feature
Turning your
‘curse’ into a cause
Life as a challenged parent of a challenged child by Omokorede Adewale Fasoro
photo by Jake Levin
‘I am sorry, Mrs Fasoro, we cannot take him in again this term. His presence in the school...’,‘Why does he sound so different?’, ‘Why does he not act like children his age?’, ‘Aunty, why is Daniel not talking to me and not playing with me...?’ The list could go on and on. These were some of the statements and questions I had heard a number of times from different people( both young and old), since I embarked on this interesting journey, as a challenged parent of a challenged child. A special-needs child is one that 46
has a challenge in certain developmental areas of his physical or psychological make up. It could be a physical or a mental challenge, or sometimes, both! Examples of these are Cerebral Palsy, Down syndrome, Autism, ADHD, mental retardation, physical blindness,deafness, speech delay and so on. As a result, the child’s growth and development is hampered. So most times, he/ she needs special attention and care to be able to get by like his peers in simple everyday activities. Each of the conditions mentioned above has its own unique characteristics, depending on its level of seriousness. For me, the journey started about seven years ago, thirty weeks after my son’s birth. As a matter of fact, the doctor had secretly told my husband that considering the complications involved, Daniel had just 50% chances of surviving. However, I thank God that after about two weeks battle for his
survival, he made it through. As we were being discharged from the hospital, I heaved a sigh of relief, thanking God it was all over, not realising that we (my husband and I) had just enrolled in the ‘school of life’; as parents of a very special child. As the days, months and years unfolded, we realised we had a very special young man in our hands to care for. Every thing about him became a prayer point and faith project. Issues about my older children which I had always taken for granted and never even bothered to pray to God about, let alone to thank Him for, soon became more significant. Some of these issues are his being able to sit at the right time, crawl, stand, walk, call me ‘mummy’, become potty trained, brush his teeth himself, and so on. I then realised how ungrateful I had been to God concerning my older children. Previously, I had assumed that everything concerning any child would take its normal course. The good news however, is that the Lord has always proved Himself faithful. Re-calling the events of the past years, my conclusion is that though we’re still preparing for where we believe God is taking Daniel, we know that we’re not where we used to be; we’ve moved forward. You might read the last statement and wonder what woman of great faith, power and might I must be. I must confess that this is not exactly true. Over the years, I have had to cry, get worried, grumble, complain and question God over and over again on why my child’s situation was that bad. Sometimes, I felt ‘cheated’ by nature, especially when I saw him with other children his age. Then, I admired their parents because they did not seem to have anything to struggle over with their kids. Despite all these past thoughts of mine,God had gemwoman | November/December 2007
