better better call call saul saul about about the the eshays eshays
words by: daniel sladojevic
Have you ever wondered how you can actually arrest someone? Sure, we’ve all seen it on Law & Order and that Night Stalker documentary, but what can I legally do if I need to arrest someone? What if they resist? And what if they’re an eshay? What is an eshay? Like yourself, I didn’t really care about, or think I needed to know the answer to any of, these important questions until very recently.
happen if I had tried to tackle one and put him under citizen’s arrest. Was I even allowed to do that? Surely, but when could I? Would it be assault if I hurt him while tackling him?
First, an eshay? Do you mean those skinny wanna-be gangsters who roam around Rundle Mall with their speakers and bum bags just screaming Kerser lyrics? Well yes, basically. Urban Dictionary would add that they usually walk around in polo shirts, tracksuits and weird Air Max’s while adopting a strict dresscode of Ralph Lauren, Nike, Tommy Hilfiger and Adidas – but you get the message.
In circumstances you may need to arrest and detain, a person – you better keep in mind the following information:
Instead of trying to work this out by myself, I did the smart thing and called attorney-at-law Saul Goodman, who gave me the following advice:
In SA, you can legally arrest and detain a person if you witness them commit:
1. An indictable offence 2. Theft 3. An offence against the person (homicide, Now, a few weeks ago while picking up pizza neglect, assault, rape, etc.) from Dominos at 11pm on a Friday, a group 4. Interference with, damage to or destrucof four young eshays decided to jump out on tion of property the road and egg my car with nearly a dozen eggs. Yes, that actually happened, and I’ll ad- If arresting someone, you must: mit there were nearly tears then – but I clearly 1. Witness them commit the required ofsee the humour in it now. However, at the fence. time I was seeing pure red in anger, and had 2. Tell them you are arresting them, and I not been on crutches, I would have parked why. the car, attempted chase and hopefully tack- 3. If force is required, it must be reasonable led at least one of them. 4. Once they submit to arrest, you must call police or otherwise deliver them into poLuckily, this didn’t happen and I helplessly lice custody. watched them finish recording their Snapchat and run off into the adjacent Foodland For more information, see section 271 of the carpark. After cooling off and eating my piz- Criminal Consolidation Act (SA). za(s), I thought about what would actually 32
