Recipes for broke(n hearted) law students

recipes for all you broke(n hearted) recipes for all you broke(n hearted) law students out there. law students out there.

Do you have a minimal budget, minimal cooking skills and a maximum hole in your heart because you’re sick of eating toast for breakfast, lunch and dinner? Never fear! Here are some (vaguely) nutritious meals that will help feed your brain and get you through law school. Disclaimer: If you can’t manage to cook these then there is quite possibly no hope left for you. Your only hope is to marry rich.

Recipes 1: Instant Noodles but make them ~fancy~

Long have the people minimised instant noodles as the diet of poor, lazy and malnourished Uni students. They’re right but use this recipe to show them we also possess culinary skills slightly greater than a 10 year old and only require the simplest of instructions to succeed.

Pro tip: Many packets of instant noodles are vegetarian/vegan friendly

Ingredients

• A packet of instant noodles and the flavouring (for extra nutrients) • A cup of mixed vegetables (use the frozen ones, they’re cheap just like you hun) • Chilli flakes • Soy sauce • Garlic (fresh, minced, dried - I don’t care) • Oil

Method

1. In a hot frying pan add a dash of oil and cook your garlic until golden brown – try not to let the garlic aromas permeate your clothes too much unless Buffy the Vampire Slayer is your dream aesthetic. 2. Once cooked, add in your cup of frozen veggies and let them cook 3. While the veggies are cooking in the pan take you 2 min noodles, pop them in a bowl and cover them with boiling water. 4. DON’T FORGET TO STIR THE VEGGIES!!!! 5. When the noodles are cooked, strain the water and set them aside. Afterwards, feel free to repurpose the colander as a quirky attention grabbing hat. (You know you want the validation). 6. When the veggies are cooked add the noodles to the pan along with the flavouring packets, chilli and soy sauce to taste.

A wise person once said, “you can’t taste your disappointment if you cover it in enough spice”. With this recipe you can do just that and ignore your problems while filling your stomach in preparation for your daily nap. Whip up a quick batch of some delicious tacos and enjoy!

Ingredients

• Can of kidney/black beans • Can of diced tomatoes • Half an onion diced (you can pretend it’s making you cry but we all know it’s really the impending doom of 4 unfinished assignments) • Packet of mexican spice mix (You can make this yourself but honestly who has the energy) • Any vegetables of your choice or whatever you have wilting in your crisper • Tortillas/rice/corn chips • Sour cream • Cheese • Meat. Kidding! No meat. You’re earning a law clerk’s wage remember?

Method

1. In a hot frying pan add a dash of oil and cook your onion until golden. 2. Add the can of beans and any other vegetables and stir for a few minutes before adding the diced tomatoes. 3. Add the spice mix and stir. 4. Take off the heat and serve with whatever your heart desires. 5. Stop procrastinating and go finish those readings!!!

Recipe 3: Whatever you want to eat waffles.

The best thing about this recipe? You can use anything! Your leftover burrito mixture! Your old hopes and dreams! Want to offend several cultures and foodies at once? Make a pizza quesadilla waffle hybrid!

Just pop whatever you see when you open your fridge into a waffle maker and toast it up! Don’t have any waffle mixture or anything else that resembles food handy? That’s okay! The clean, un-highlighted pages of your law textbook purchased last semester will work just as well!

Beverage suggestions to accompany your meal:

Water is for the weak. Don’t deny yourself that 10th coffee you’ve been craving. Your lawyer brain needs all the bean juice it can get.