Bl ck Love It’s impossible to apply real or digital advice if you don’t know who you are at the most basic level. It is essential that you are aware of your core values; the stuff that really matters to you. The “you” that maybe no one really knows, or you forgot about. Take this moment as a golden opportunity to meet the “you” you were before your family, peers, former lovers and social media coached you into being somebody else. Ask yourself: Who were you before someone told you were unlovable? Too big, too small or not enough to be loved? You’ve fashioned yourself according to everyone else’s requirements for so long your identity is distorted. And when you tried to push back and advocate for yourself, your past mistakes were thrown in your face. So you began to doubt that you really could make decisions for yourself at all. You concluded maybe it’s just better to listen to those who “care” about me. In the process of becoming acceptable to all these external forces, you succumbed to the pressure, and allowed your voice to be drowned out along with your identity. “Hey Black Child, do you know who you are? Who you really are?” 2 How do we propagate Black Love winning? By intentionally preparing ourselves to give what we desire and possess what we require. You can start by considering these gentle calls to action: 2 Perkins (1975)
Learn yourself, for real. Self-knowledge activates your ability to hear your voice, authentically. Having conversations with yourself by yourself provides space for selfdiscovery. After you reintroduce yourself to yourself you will quickly be better equipped to recognize what does not bring you joy. If it doesn’t propel you toward your highest good, your spirit will subsequently reject it. As an added bonus, your social circle will alter itself, as you consistently emerge selfreliant and self-confident. Get back to her. Rediscover that girl you left behind or hid so you could survive and avoid getting your heart broken. Apologize to her, forgive her and extend some grace to “little you” that's screaming to be heard. Find out what she likes, what turns her on, what makes her eyes sparkle. Daydream big, high definition, 3D, vivid fantasies like you did as a child, before adulting and adults forced you to be logical. Replace the soundtrack of unrequited love and heartbreak with mental replays of the love you secretly desire but may be embarrassed or too jaded to admit!
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