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Monday, July 1, 2019
Owning a car doesn't have to break the bank Hey Taylor - Between insurance, my lease, and gas, my car is costing me over $1,000 a month. How can I get this number lower? I’m feeling pretty helpless right now. - Steve
or the days you drive to lunch instead of eating at the office? Cars give us a great convenience that we’re all too happy to take advantage of, but you have to remember that travel comes at a price.
3. Think about getting a different car. It seems like a lot of work, but trading in an expensive car for a cheaper model will help Taylor Kovar with all your problems. You might be resistant because you don’t want money issues to keep Hey Steve - I completely you out of your dream car, but empathize. Our cars are so vital to believe me - it feels a lot better our daily lives, and there’s nothing sitting behind the wheel of an cheap about owning and awesome car when you can maintaining a vehicle. Let’s see if I rightly afford to do so. Look at can help you chip away at that certified pre-owned vehicles or monthly bill. see if anyone you know and trust might be looking to sell a good 1. Inquire about insurance costs. car. If a lease is making it hard to Different plans will save you in get by every month, you different ways. You don’t want to probably need to ditch the lease. go with a super low premium because that could leave you in a You might have to shake things bad way when it comes time to use up more than you want, but your deductible, but you might be there’s a way to save money and able to adjust your plan to better keep on driving. Keep your longmeet your needs and save you a term goals in mind, make the little money. Sometimes coverage savvy choice and everything will includes benefits you don’t really work out. Good luck, Steve! need and a quick call to your agent will save you $50 bucks a month or Taylor Kovar, CEO of Kovar so. If you’ve had the same policy Capital. Read more about through the same agent for a long Taylor at GoFarWithKovar.com time, get on the phone and see what they might be willing to offer or Disclaimer: Information even take a few minutes and shop presented is for educational around your policy to different purposes only and is not an offer carriers. or solicitation for the sale or purchase of any specific 2. Don’t drive when you don’t have securities, investments, or to. You’re probably looking at investment strategies. insurance and the lease as the Investments involve risk and, numbers you most want to drive unless otherwise stated, are not down, but if you put some effort guaranteed. Be sure to first into it, I bet you can lower your gas consult with a qualified financial spending significantly. I’ve got a adviser and/or tax professional post on GoFarWithKovar.com before implementing any about easy ways to save for strategy discussed herein. To vacations and I note changing your submit a question to be driving habits as one of the best answered in this column, please ways to put more money in your send it via email to bank account. I’m sure you have to Question@GoFarWithKovar.com, or go to and from work every day, but via USPS to Taylor Kovar, 415 S how about those quick drives to the 1st St, Suite 300, Lufkin, TX store when you could easily walk, 75901.
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Living with children Q: On several occasions over the last six months or so, our 12-year-old son has told us he’s been thinking about suicide. Apparently, he’s been the John Rosemond target of a couple of school bullies and sometimes feels like life is too much. We’ve talked to him, tried to help him express his feelings, and tried to help him figure out how to solve these problems, but do you have other suggestions? Other than these three episodes, by the way, things in his life seem to be great. He has lots of friends, is liked by his teachers, and doesn’t act generally depressed.
worth living” meme. The second question is, what should parents do? The best advice I can give along that line is “If and when your child begins talking about suicide, even in a veiled way, make statements as opposed to asking questions.” Asking questions is likely to lead parents down one emotional rabbit hole after another.
In a situation of this sort, questions have a way of validating the child’s feelings. Despite what many therapists will advise, that is NOT the proper approach. Much better to make statements, such as: “To be honest, suicide is an inappropriate response to a problem, no matter how big the problem seems at the moment, so let’s talk about real solutions rather than dwelling on your feelings,” “The problems you are dealing A: I have one suggestion, but with are not unusual and they certainly aren’t forever, but suicide first, a fact: Over the past fifty is most definitely forever,” years, child and teen suicide has “You’re thinking entirely too increased, per capita, more than much about yourself. Perhaps you ten-fold, and that may well be an need to do some service work, underestimate. Two questions something that will take your mind ensue: off the subject of you and your troubles,” and “Let’s talk about First, what’s going on? The short answer is that post-1960s parenting solving these problems, because if you commit suicide, they will not – informed as it is by bogus be solved. The kids who are psychological parenting picking on you will simply start on propaganda – leaves many young someone else because the problem people inadequately prepared to deal with the challenging realities is them, not you.” Even, “That’s of life. That objective requires that not the intelligent response to a problem, ANY problem, and you parents, by and large, expect children to solve problems of their are, in fact, an intelligent person. You can tough this out. Let’s talk own making (and even a good about how.” number of the ones they don’t make), say “no” to at least 99 The child in question does not percent of a child’s requests for indulgence and entitlement, enroll need to be engaged in a personal children in more household chores pity-party that lends authenticity to his/her out-of-control emotions; than after-school activities, and but rather led to think correctly. insist, from a relatively early age, Another way of saying this: When upon good emotional control. a child lacks a governor on his/her That’s merely the short list. thinking and emotions, the child’s Beginning in the 1960s, people in parents (or some other emotionally competent person) need(s) to step my field (including an earlier version of yours truly) told parents in and be the governor. that children should be allowed to It’s become cliché, but it’s truth express their feelings freely lest they “bottle up” their emotions and nonetheless: The most powerful love is tough love. develop all manner of psychological malfunctions. The Family psychologist John result of this atrocious advice has Rosemond: johnrosemond.com, been children who have no parentguru.com. governor on their feelings. To all too many of today’s kids, every John Rosemond has worked with feeling is a valid state, worthy of families, children, and parents expression and deserving of since 1971 in the field of family attention. For proof of this, one psychology. In 1971, John need only understand that social media has become, for many teens, earned his masters in psychology from Western Illinois University a stage upon which they perform and was elected to the Phi their personal soap operas, one of Kappa Phi National Honor which involves the “my life isn’t Society.
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