Owning a car doesn't have to break the bank

Hey Taylor - Between insurance, my lease, and gas, my car is costing me over $1,000 a month How can I get this number lower?

Taylor Kovar

I’m feeling pretty helpless right now

- Steve

Hey Steve - I completely empathize Our cars are so vital to our daily lives, and there’s nothing cheap about owning and maintaining a vehicle Let’s see if I can help you chip away at that monthly bill

1 Inquire about insurance costs

Different plans will save you in different ways You don’t want to go with a super low premium because that could leave you in a bad way when it comes time to use your deductible, but you might be able to adjust your plan to better meet your needs and save you a little money Sometimes coverage includes benefits you don’t really need and a quick call to your agent will save you $50 bucks a month or so If you’ve had the same policy through the same agent for a long time, get on the phone and see what they might be willing to offer or even take a few minutes and shop around your policy to different carriers

2 Don’t drive when you don’t have to You’re probably looking at insurance and the lease as the numbers you most want to drive down, but if you put some effort into it, I bet you can lower your gas spending significantly. I’ve got a post on GoFarWithKovarcom about easy ways to save for vacations and I note changing your driving habits as one of the best ways to put more money in your bank account I’m sure you have to go to and from work every day, but how about those quick drives to the store when you could easily walk,

Living with children

or the days you drive to instead of eating at the Cars give us a great co that we’re all too happ advantage of, but you h remember that travel c price

3 Think about getting car It seems like a lot but trading in an expensive car for a cheaper model will help with all your problems. You might be resistant because you don’t want money issues to keep you out of your dream car, but believe me - it feels a lot better sitting behind the wheel of an awesome car when you can rightly afford to do so Look at certified pre-owned vehicles or see if anyone you know and trust might be looking to sell a good car If a lease is making it hard to get by every month, you probably need to ditch the lease

You might have to shake things up more than you want, but there’s a way to save money and keep on driving Keep your longterm goals in mind, make the savvy choice and everything will work out Good luck, Steve!

Taylor Kovar, CEO of Kovar

Capital Read more about Taylor at GoFarWithKovar com

Disclaimer: Information presented is for educational purposes only and is not an offer or solicitation for the sale or purchase of any specific securities, investments, or investment strategies

Investments involve risk and, unless otherwise stated, are not guaranteed Be sure to first consult with a qualified financial adviser and/or tax professional before implementing any strategy discussed herein To submit a question to be answered in this column, please send it via email to Question@GoFarWithKovar com, or via USPS to Taylor Kovar, 415 S 1st St, Suite 300, Lufkin, TX 75901

Q: On several occasions over the last six months or so, our 12-year-old son has told us he’s been thinking about suicide Apparently, he’s been the target of a couple of school bullies and sometimes feels like life is too much We’ve talked to him, tried to help him express his feelings, and tried to help him figure out how to solve these problems, but do you have other suggestions? Other than these three episodes, by the way, things in his life seem to be great He has lots of friends, is liked by his teachers, and doesn’t act generally depressed

A: I have one suggestion, but first, a fact: Over the past fifty years, child and teen suicide has increased, per capita, more than ten-fold, and that may well be an underestimate Two questions ensue:

First, what’s going on? The short answer is that post-1960s parenting – informed as it is by bogus psychological parenting propaganda – leaves many young people inadequately prepared to deal with the challenging realities of life That objective requires that parents, by and large, expect children to solve problems of their own making (and even a good number of the ones they don’t make), say “no” to at least 99 percent of a child’s requests for indulgence and entitlement, enroll children in more household chores than after-school activities, and insist, from a relatively early age, upon good emotional control That’s merely the short list

Beginning in the 1960s, people in my field (including an earlier version of yours truly) told parents that children should be allowed to express their feelings freely lest they “bottle up” their emotions and develop all manner of psychological malfunctions The result of this atrocious advice has been children who have no governor on their feelings To all too many of today’s kids, every feeling is a valid state, worthy of expression and deserving of attention For proof of this, one need only understand that social media has become, for many teens, a stage upon which they perform their personal soap operas, one of which involves the “my life isn’t worth living” meme

The second question is, what should parents do? The best advice I can give along that line is “If and when your child begins talking about suicide, even in a veiled way, make statements as opposed to asking questions ” Asking questions is likely to lead parents down one emotional rabbit hole after another

In a situation of this sort, questions have a way of validating the child’s feelings Despite what many therapists will advise, that is NOT the proper approach Much better to make statements, such as:

“To be honest, suicide is an inappropriate response to a problem, no matter how big the problem seems at the moment, so let’s talk about real solutions rather than dwelling on your feelings,” “The problems you are dealing with are not unusual and they certainly aren’t forever, but suicide is most definitely forever,” “You’re thinking entirely too much about yourself Perhaps you need to do some service work, something that will take your mind off the subject of you and your troubles,” and “Let’s talk about solving these problems, because if you commit suicide, they will not be solved The kids who are picking on you will simply start on someone else because the problem is them, not you ” Even, “That’s not the intelligent response to a problem, ANY problem, and you are, in fact, an intelligent person You can tough this out Let’s talk about how”

The child in question does not need to be engaged in a personal pity-party that lends authenticity to his/her out-of-control emotions; but rather led to think correctly Another way of saying this: When a child lacks a governor on his/her thinking and emotions, the child’s parents (or some other emotionally competent person) need(s) to step in and be the governor

It’s become cliché, but it’s truth nonetheless: The most powerful love is tough love

Family psychologist John Rosemond: johnrosemond.com, parentguru com

John Rosemond has worked with families, children, and parents since 1971 in the field of family psychology In 1971, John earned his masters in psychology from Western Illinois University and was elected to the Phi Kappa Phi National Honor Society