TIPS Issue 15

COECT EXCLUSIVE MAGAZINE

T.I.Ps

Trauma Informed Parents A COECT Special Edition

IN THIS ISSUE:

ISSUE No.15 May 2025

A NEW CHAPTER FOR COECT “I Hear You” Introducing our new Supportive Listening Service

“ Let’s Meet-Up” Finding Strength in Shared Experience: The Power of Peer Support at COECT

Working Together: Aligned in a Trauma-Informed Approach Our Free Training for Universities, Local Authorities and Charities

New Limited Series: Trauma Talks Podcast A Sneak Peek at Our Upcoming Podcast Series

Photo: ©Coect

Meet the Team!

Executive Editor - Sarah Naish

Executive Editor - Sair Penna

Managing Editor - Kathryn Talbot

Contributor - Emma Edwards

Kathryn is co-founder and Director of The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C specialising in communications and public relations.

Emma is a Therapeutic Parent, Adopter, Parent Coach. Emma is also co-founder and Director of Therapeutic Services and Ambassador for England at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C.

Contributor - Gareth Thomas

Contributor - Jessica Spenceley

Contributor - Joanne Wilson

Contributor - Danielle WhatlingGleadall

Sarah is a Therapeutic Parent, an Adopter of five siblings, Best selling international Author, Keynote Speaker and founder of three Independent Therapeutic Fostering Agencies. Sarah is also and cofounder and CEO at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C.

Sair (Sarah) is a Therapeutic Parent, Author, Parent Coach and Havening practitioner. Sair is also co-founder and Director of Training, Qualifications & Quality at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C

Gareth is a Kinship Carer to three children, and has volunteered with children for fifteen years. He hosts and produces the new CoECT Podcast series "Trauma Talks". Gareth is also a Senior Trainer and Ambassador for Wales at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C.

Joanne is an experienced assessor who has been part of our qualifications team for several years. She has recently stepped into the role of Operations Manager at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C., and she is based at our Head Office in Gloucestershire.

Jessica is a therapeutic social worker with over 20 years of experience helping adoptive parents navigate their parenting journeys using the attachment-based, trauma-informed parenting approach of TBRI®.

Danielle is an experienced member of the COECT team, having overseen the training division for several years. She now supports our Corporate Members, at our Head Office in Gloucestershire.

Contributor - Amanda Mauger-Jones

Mandie is a therapeutic foster parent with expertise in empathic listening. She is a practitioner informed by Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy (DDP), a TraumaInformed Trainer and practitioner for our Therapeutic Services, including the newly launched Supportive Listening Service.

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TRAUMA-INFORMED PARENTS

CONTENTS

9 Working Together: Aligned in a TraumaInformed Approach

13 “I Hear You” Introducing our new Supportive Listening Service

4 A NEW CHAPTER FOR COECT

15 “Let’s Meet-Up” Finding Strength in Shared Experience: The Power of Peer Support at COECT

3 Editor's Note

Written By Sarah Naish

5 Introducing TIPS Consults

6 When Meeting with Family Stirs Up Big Feelings: How to Support Your Child

8 Are Family Courts Meeting Their Purpose?

Do They Understand Trauma?

Photo: ©COECT via Canva

17 Unveiling the New TIPs Hub Membership

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18 New Limited Series: Trauma Talks – from The Therapeutic Parenting Podcast

20-22 UPCOMING EVENTS & TRAINING

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From its beginnings as a Therapeutic Parenting Group on Facebook a decade ago, we have evolved into a Community Interest Company dedicated to supporting parents of children who have faced early life trauma and display neurodiverse charachteristics. This edition focuses on The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C.

Editor’s Note Welcome to May's edition of TIPS magazine!

This is a special issue that we have been eagerly awaiting to publish, as it shares some exciting news. For the past six months, we have been working tirelessly behind the scenes to merge the companies that provide Training, Peer support, and Therapeutic services. As of 1 May 2025, we proudly announce that we are now The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C! In this edition, we will showcase our new membership, which brings all services in one place. I will leave our CEO, Sarah Naish, to tell you more about this in the article she has written in this edition of TIPs. We also have contributions from Joanne Wilson, our new Operations Manager, and Danielle WhatlingGleadall, our Corporate Members Coordinator. They will discuss their roles in supporting our members, the benefits of membership, and how they can help you access these services.

We join our Director of Therapeutic Services, Emma Edwards, who introduces our new peer support services, and Amanda Mauger-Jones has written an article on her new role in the Supportive Listening Call service, which all members can access as part of the new membership.

Gareth Thomas, our Trainer and Ambassador for Wales, will also share details about our exciting new COeCT podcast series, "Trauma Talks," which he is hosting.

We are also joined by our resident writer Jessica Spenceley who has written about family time/meeting with family members which some refer to as contact, and how parents and carers can support children in navigating their time with their birth families.

As always, we would love to hear from you. Do get in contact with us by emailing tips@coect.co.uk.

Sair Penna Executive Editor

Kathryn Talbot Managing Editor

Warmest wishes Sair, Sarah & The Team at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C

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A NEW CHAPTER FOR COECT

gs, win ve ha lys !” uin an f tead s c ng pe hey im in r t ou w se mean to s t rn cau be esn’ lea t s o m h “Ju it d p the ais l hN he ara t’s S e L

The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C

Written By Sarah Naish We are delighted to announce that all our companies have now merged into one not-for-profit company called The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma.

We made the decision to combine the National Association of Therapeutic Parents, Inspire Training Group, and The Haven Parenting and Wellbeing Centre Ltd to make things easier for our members and service users.

Since forming Inspire Training Group in 2014, I have become more committed to making sure we can provide services for parents of neurodiverse children, whether through trauma or any other way, social workers and other supporting professionals. We felt it was only by combining all our services into one place that we could make it easy for everyone who needs access.

As a trainer and author in the field, I have become aware that there are still

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huge gaps in training and meaningful support for parents who are trying to get their head around therapeutic parenting. One of these shortfalls is in social work training, where social workers are still woefully unprepared to meet the challenges of behaviours our children demonstrate due to their past trauma. Now, The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma will be able to roll out free training for social workers who are working for Local Authority teams or in charities.

Our First Steps in Trauma Informed Practise will make relationships easier for social workers and the families they support. This month, I have delivered training in Universities and Local Authorities.

Our training team go out every single day delivering this essential trauma-informed basis. We work with schools, we have our own

own education team and we continue to work away at changing the world for you.

We can now be confident that parents who feel isolated, alone, and judged no longer need to stay in that lonely place. The support network which ran through The National Association of Therapeutic Parents will be able to access enhanced support through our TIPS Hub. We have also joined up with Kinship Carers UK to increase the number of support groups available, both online and face to face.

Virtually everybody who works in our team, has firsthand experience of parenting neurodiverse children, or indeed are people who spent some of their childhood in care. It is this unique perspective that allows us to really identify the issues of the day and come up with practical

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strategies and solutions for them.

trauma and neurodiversity, and to meet all those unmet needs.

Along with my long-suffering business partner, Sair Penna, I believe we have managed to overcome so many of the obstacles and challenges placed in our path. Sair has now put together a whole raft of Trauma Informed qualifications.

All are independently

Our mindset is one of solving complex problems. Finding outdated models and methods of intervention and changing them!

When my five adopted children were young, there was very little help for me. I was largely left to raise them and work it all out for myself as I went along. This is not right. It is not a good service for families who adopt or foster. It is

accredited and truly help parents and supporting professionals to upskill, see behaviours through the lens of

not a good service for kinship carers, and it definitely fails our children.

By bringing all our services under one umbrella, on a notfor-profit basis, we can now address the root of the problems facing professionals and families.

Sarah Naish, CEO of The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C

Introducing

Are you looking for a supportive space to explore real-life challenges in therapeutic parenting and session is packed with insight,

is your chance to be part of a

empathy, and real-world

community that truly

The CoECT team invites you to

advice. These aren’t just

understands. Join us, share

our monthly Virtual Group

conversations—they’re

your story, and leave with tools

Meet-Up called TIPS Consult —

opportunities to develop

you can use to support your

a welcoming online support

insight, connect with others

family.

group designed to empower

and bring clarity to situations

you with practical, solution-

relating to parenting children

focused strategies.

who have experienced early

trauma-informed care?

life trauma, or those who Led by our expert-by-

display neurodiverse

experience team—including

charachteristcs,

Sarah Naish, Sarah Dillon, Sair Penna, Emma Edwards, Gareth

Whether you're a parent,

Thomas, Dave Edwards and

carer, or professional, this

our team of trainers - each

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Membership Benefit Join us on Thursday 26th June 10:00 am - 11:00 am via Zoom To book go to https://www.coect.co.uk/ coect-training-events

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Photo: ©JSpenceley

When Meeting with Family Stirs Up Big Feelings: How to Support Your Child Written By Jessica Spenceley Spending time with past caregivers or relatives can stir up a mix of emotions and trigger past traumas. Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) offers you a range of strategies to help your child navigate these experiences.

Through increasing containment, recognising feelings, and supporting felt-safety, you can help your child feel more secure and regulated as they process the complexities of these relationships.

Increase Containment Whether family time involves seeing people in person, calls, or letters, creating a greater sense of containment around the experience will help your child to feel safer. It can be as simple as walking your child through what’s going to happen so they know what to expect: “We’re going to meet your brother and his parents at the park on Saturday morning. We’ll play for a bit, and then we’ll head to the café for lunch. When we’re all done with lunch, we’ll say our goodbyes and come home. And we’ll look forward to seeing your brother again during your next school break.”

Having a clear sense of structure around contact will help your child manage the uncertainty ISSUE 15

they’ll likely be feeling. However, words alone aren’t enough.

Adopted children often need visual cues to help them process information and understand what’s happening. Consider what your child might respond to: maybe it’s a calendar on the fridge with the date of the meeting clearly marked; maybe it’s pictures showing each part of your upcoming visit; or maybe you create drawings together.

The idea is to connect your words and the visuals so that your child has a sense of structure around what will be happening.

Role-playing or acting out parts of the experience ahead of time can also help. You might use stuffed animals to practice saying goodbye or act out different parts of the visit. Creating a safe way for your child to “try on” the experience before it happens can help ease uncertainty and provide reassurance.

Recognise Feelings Meeting with family can trigger complicated feelings, and holding both the “positive” and “negative” emotions around it can be confusing and overwhelming for your child. However, a simple acknowledgment of what they’re feeling can help make things feel more manageable for your child:

"I wonder if getting the letter from your birth mum made you feel a bit happy and also a bit mad?"

Meeting with birth family can be complex, and so are your child’s feelings about it. These sorts of responses help your child make sense of what’s happening for them on the inside and know that it’s ok to feel different emotions at the same time. Even if your child doesn’t give you a lot of feedback in the moment, they’ll be taking in the very big message that you understand them and that they aren’t alone.

You might also notice that your child needs extra connection before or after contact. These shifts are signals that they need more support, and playfully engaging, doing sensory activities, and simply being present can help them regulate.

Support Felt-Safety Family time/contact often stirs up the impact of the past. You might notice that difficulties suddenly resurface, behaviours become challenging, or your child just seems off. One of the ways you can help your child to feel more secure and in balance is through supporting their sense of felt-safety.

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A primary way to do this is through increasing your connection in intentional ways. TBRI offers you a lot of strategies to do this, like

Photo: © COECT via canva

offering your undivided attention, using reassuring touch, being mindful of your tone of voice, or playing. Sometimes, your child’s nervous system will need extra support to return to balance.

Simple, regulating activities like rocking, swinging, deep pressure, or even quiet time together can help. Pay attention to what helps your child feel calm and use those strategies when you notice dysregulation.

Final Thoughts Supporting your child through meetings with family members is a journey. By increasing containment, recognising their feelings, and building felt-safety, you can help them navigate its complexities in a way that feels reassuring. Over time, your child will feel more equipped to manage the complexities that family time brings.

98%

Jessica is the founder of Nurtured Belonging where she helps parents and adopted children overcome challenges, heal from the past, and build strong, connected relationships.

To connect with Jessica, go to https://nurturedbelonging.com/.

That’s the percentage of SAfER foster families who stay together, year after year.

In a system where children too often move between homes and lose vital relationships, stability is everything.

At SAfER, we’re here to help families stay strong so that children can stay where they belong—in safe, loving homes that last.

https://saferfostering.org.uk

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Stability is possible. We’ll help you get there.

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Are Family Courts Meeting Their Purpose?

Do They Understand Trauma?

Time after time, we see children who have been traumatised by birth parents being ordered to see them or returned to them inappropriately. The children are re-traumatised each time.

We would love to hear your thoughts.

Please can you take a few minutes to complete our survey?

https://tinyurl.com/yc39tb7a

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Working Together: Aligned in a Trauma-Informed Approach Written By Sair Penna The term "trauma-informed" can sometimes be perceived as a buzzword, which isn’t a bad thing; buzzwords can raise awareness about important concepts and encourage practitioners and the organisations they work for to adopt supportive practices. However, there is the risk, with anything, that a term can be used superficially, lacking a true understanding of its principles, and used as a “tick-box exercise,” which can lead to the approach not meeting the needs of the individuals it is there to support.

Recognising the impact of Trauma To be truly trauma-informed allows you to understand what it means for an individual to experience a traumatic event. There are many causes of trauma; physical, emotional and sexual abuse, neglect, bereavement, domestic abuse, war, illness, injury or witnessing a traumatic event can all impact a person in some way, shape or form.

The way trauma affects a person can also be a uniquely individual experience and vary from person to

qualities and resources that enable us

Our brains are able to find patterns

to cope with and recover from

in the things we see, hear, smell,

adversity effectively, then our

taste and do, mainly to perceive

landscape has resilience to

threat and danger and keep us safe,

experiences. How resilient a person’s

which has been a great tool in

landscape is depends on many

keeping us safe since we existed on

factors, including our life experiences

earth, especially as it kept people

and the impact that they have had

safe from fierce predatory animals,

on us, our relationships with others,

by triggering our fight & flight

and whether we have secure

response. Sometimes our brains

attachments to significant others

recognise patterns that are similar

who can give encouragement, care,

but not exactly the same.

and guidance. Epigenetics can

person. What might be traumatic for

impact how we have adapted

This can lead to problems when

one person may not impact another

through generations to manage

specific situations are associated

person similarly. Our ability to cope

traumatic events, which can then

with traumatic memories,

with experiences depends on our

impact our biological makeup. Also,

potentially triggering a child or

emotional and mental landscape and

having the resources like education

young person’s emotional response.

its resilience. In other words, if we

and information to adjust to

These triggers can include a whole

possess a robust set of personal

situations can affect whether

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range of stimuli, like people, buildings,

Parents will be able to work with

The best-selling A-Z books by

objects, places, smells, other actions and

professionals to share information

Sarah Naish and the COECT team

routines, to name a few. Parents and

about their child and this

have proven to be valuable

carers of children and young people who

partnership can greatly benefit the

resources for parents and

have experienced trauma often become

child in helping them thrive and

professionals alike, helping to

very attuned to these triggers,

meet their full potential with

bridge the knowledge gap

particularly if they are familiar with the

therapeutically aligned support.

regarding trauma-informed

child’s early life experiences and life story

When there is a gap in knowledge

practices through real-life

and the impact those experiences have

or skills between the family and

perspectives. Many parents and

had on the child's internal working

professionals, it can become a

carers have shared that they

model.

barrier to the family receiving the

purchased a copy for their child’s

necessary support for their child.

school or social work team to

Trauma-informed Families

support their understanding of

Caring for a child who has experienced

At COECT, the parents, families,

their child’s needs and get them

trauma adds a new dimension to the

social workers, teachers, and

on the same page, so it is easier

concept of a trauma-informed approach.

healthcare professionals we work

to come up with a plan to help

Families raising children with a history of

with share a common goal: to

the child.

early life trauma often find themselves

understand developmental trauma.

deeply affected by the after-effects of

They seek to comprehend why

Closing the gap

that trauma. They experience its impact

children display behaviours that

This is where we began to think

through both the subconscious and

can be considered challenging or

about how we could help

conscious behaviours of the child, and

socially unacceptable, and they

support parents and the

for some families this can be a daily

want to learn how they can support

professionals they work with

reality, which is often compassionately

these children in their growth,

further understand trauma,

accepted as part of the norm of their

learning, development, and healing.

including the impact which

family life.

More often than not they want to

parental compassion fatigue can

Parents and carers can be powerful

learn about trauma-informed

have on the parent and family,

advocates for their children, particularly

practices and therapeutic parenting

and how underestimating how

when they understand their child's

strategies because it enables them

much compassion fatigue does

triggers and how to provide support.

to support and advocate for the

impact the family can also be

This awareness can be incredibly

child or young person, they are

detrimental to family stability. In

beneficial for the professionals working

caring for in the best possible way

the therapeutic foster agencies,

with the child, whether in social care,

for their child’s needs to be met.

we work with in the COECT

healthcare, or educational settings.

community; we know that having supporting professionals who see the impact of trauma on families can prevent family breakdowns and the need for children to move homes.

It also empowers those working in the social, health and education sector to use their underpinning knowledge and tools to support children and their families, with confidence.

Having someone who understands that the behaviours children display is a way of communicating their experiences can be life changing.

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It is important to acknowledge the

supporting professionals as we can

families receive the support

support families need and recognise

seeking to access trauma informed

they need to change their

the resources a child may require to

training to support the children and

narrative. A child's past

adapt and learn. We know of

families they work with. Our Social

experiences do not have to

thousands of professionals who

Care Sector Hub was established as

dictate their future and by

have accessed our training and

a platform offering webinars on

supporting them in their

implemented trauma-informed

various aspects of a trauma-

healing journey with a

practices. We often hear about

informed approach. This resource is

trauma-informed approach,

dedicated professionals who

accessible to Local Authority social

can give them the

provide invaluable support to

care services and charities.

opportunity to choose how the next chapter of their life

families, making a significant difference in their lives through the

Additionally, we provide training

assistance they offer.

sessions for Universities within the

story unfolds.

Social Work and Care Sector. We As part of our mission at COECT we

believe that these initiatives will

want to support as many

ultimately help children, and their

The Social Care Sector Hub

To learn more about The Social Care Sector Hub, please visit our website. Currently, The Social Care Sector Hub is available to Local Authorities, Social Care and Fostering Teams, as well as Charities.

www.coect.co.uk/freetrainingforsocialcaresector

Scan the QR code provided

Have you subscribed to TIPs yet?

Find out more by visiting our website www.coect.co.uk

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Introducing the TIPs Hub Membership

Online Training Portal

Online Wellbeing Programme

TIPs Consult (Virtual problem solving meet-up)

TIPs Meet-Ups (Regional & Virtual Peer support groups)

Family Meet-Ups (Regional Family Events)

Discounts on Qualifications & Havening Sessions.

www.coect.co.uk

Access to Trauma-Informed Parenting Resources

Parental Peer Support Forums

Supportive Listening Calls

Join Now £18 per month

“I Hear You” Photo: ©A Mauger-Jones

Introducing our new Supportive Listening Service Written By Amanda Mauger-Jones I hear you.

What does your support network look like? Do you have someone who understands your child’s needs? Can you speak to someone who truly understands what it is like to parent a trauma experienced child? I am sure it will be of no surprise to you that most of the time the answers to these questions are often ‘No’. We all need to be heard and supported and that is where the Supportive Listening Sessions can help you.

Do you have ‘that’ friend? You know the one. The one who is a reincarnation of Mother Theresa. The one who is always super organised, making organic healthy pack lunches and having the ability to take their children to every single after school club they want to attend. Are they a great person? I’m sure they are.

Are they able to empathise with my inability to get my child to eat anything other than chicken nuggets and cheese strings? Probably not.

Can I tell them what it is like to not be able to shower for 3 days in the holidays as my 10 year old is constantly stuck to my hip from 5 in the morning until 11 at night?

Erm … no. Will they try to share their parenting wisdom with me when I try to explain how challenging my morning school run has been?

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Absolutely! Whilst also telling me how difficult their little Johnny is in the morning when he is being a ‘pickle’. It’s just not the same.

As a foster parent, I have been lucky enough to have a social worker who will listen to me ramble on about how hard my life is and how my children ‘just won’t listen!’ whilst having a cup of tea in the comfort of my own home. I know that this is not always the case. But this is something that we all need. Parenting a neurodiverse or trauma experienced child means that we have to be super parents.

All the time.

And its exhausting.

And isolating.

Now breathe.

The good news is there is someone here to help you.

Someone to listen. Someone to fill your empathy cup. This will then allow you, as the predictable, consistent parent, to be able to be that great amazing parent again that you want to be.

How does this work?

Let me tell you.

I speak to parents and carers every week who are finding things tricky and offer them a safe space

to offload, without judgement. Then when they are ready to hear them, I offer strategies which may help them moving forward out of the rut they are finding themselves in at the moment.

What do I know?

As I have already mentioned I have been a foster parent for over 10 years and during that time, I have been lucky enough to see lots of different behaviours, reactions and outcomes. I have also felt rubbish and useless when my child is going into a rage for the 4th time that day. I have experienced the lows of compassion fatigue but also the highs when I have tried something new and it has worked.

Based on all this experience and the knowledge I have gained through my DDP training and Therapeutic Parenting qualifications, I can also explain what is going on for your child at this time, how they might be feeling and the driving force behind. And let me tell you, most of the time, it’s not you, it’s how they see the world.

But, my gosh, it can feel so personal when you are in it!

If you are seeing it as a problem or an issue, or you are just feeling run down by it, I can still help. It could be that the lack of understanding with school is stressing you out or

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that they just won’t put their shoes on in the morning. Or it could be that you are having to lock yourself in another room to stay safe or they have stolen your credit card and now you have a massive bill. It doesn’t matter. If it is impacting on you being able to be your best self, I can help. Remember, a problem shared is a problem halved!

What if there is no quick fix?

Sometimes there just isn’t something that I can suggest that will make a difference in one call.

That’s ok. Here at the COECT, we work as a team around you, the parent, and there are many different options we can suggest from training courses, to Havening, to regular sessions strategizing with me. The support we offer is individual to your needs. You are the most important person in all of this and we are here to help you feel that.

OK, So how do I book a session?

You can phone head office or pop on the website and book a call. If you are not sure what support you need then book a quick 20 minute call through the Haven or book a Supportive Listening call for 45 minutes. We can then find out how best to support you moving forward.

Photo: ©Coect via Canva

So really, the only question left to answer is will this help you?

As a member, you are able to book one call with me every month at no extra cost.

What have you got to lose?

Once we have spoken, we can discuss your options.

Membership Benefit What if I don’t like you?

Fair point. But this hasn’t

Members benefit from 12 sessions each year

happened before (as far as I

of Supportive Listening Calls included with

know!). We can still help and

their TIPs membership. These sessions can

support you through another

be easily booked online via the membership

member of team. My role is not to ‘fix’ you or ‘rescue’ you but to help support you through listening and understanding.

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hub or by calling Head Office. For further details, please visit www.coect.co.uk or scan the QR code provided.

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“Let’s Meet-Up” Photo: ©Coect via Canva

Finding Strength in Shared Experience: The Power of Peer Support at COECT Written By Emma Edwards

When a child has experienced trauma, the journey to healing can feel overwhelming.

Parents and carers often find themselves searching for answers, for understanding, for someone who truly gets it. That’s where COECT steps in—a beacon of hope, a place where no one walks this path alone.

At COECT, peer support isn’t just a service; it’s a lifeline. Through the TIPs (Trauma-Informed Parents) membership, families gain access to a compassionate, understanding community that offers strength through shared experience.

One parent described their experience of finding COECT as "like finally taking a breath after holding it for too long." That breath comes through connection—whether it’s the regional and virtual TIPs Meet-Ups, family gatherings, or TIPs Consult, a virtual problemsolving session led by COECT’s Experts by Experience team. These spaces allow parents to exchange strategies, gain insights, and find reassurance that they are not alone.

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What are TIPs Meet-Ups? These supportive gatherings are designed for parents just like you—those seeking understanding, reassurance, and connection in their journey through trauma-informed parenting. Held both virtually and in-person, TIPs Meet-Ups create safe, welcoming spaces where you can connect with others who truly understand.

Our in-person TIPs Meet-Ups take place across the country, hosted by our incredible volunteers in local cafes, community spaces, and other relaxed settings. There's no formal agenda, no expectations—just a chance to share experiences over a warm drink (and often a slice of cake!).

Whether you're ready to open up or simply want to listen, there’s no pressure to speak. You can participate as much or as little as you feel comfortable.

One parent described their experience of finding COECT as "like finally taking a breath after holding it for too long."

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More than just meetings, TIPs MeetUps are places where real connections are made, and lasting friendships are formed. No judgment, no expectations—just a community ready to support you every step of the way.

Our virtual meetups offer the same supportive experience as our inperson ones, with the added convenience of joining from the comfort of your own home. No travel, no hassle—just connection. Perfect for those with busy schedules, these sessions make it easy to access encouragement and understanding without disrupting daily life.

Whether you prefer face-to-face or virtual meetups, there’s no obligation to attend every session. You can join whenever you need support, guidance, or simply the reassurance that others are walking this journey alongside you. Our goal is to make these meetups a helpful resource— never an added pressure in your already hectic world.

Family Meetups: Connection for the Whole Family In addition to regular meetups, some regions also offer family meetups, where you and your loved ones can connect with others in a welcoming, judgment-free space.

These gatherings provide an opportunity to relax, share experiences, and receive support, all while your children play and enjoy themselves.

The beauty of family meet-ups is the deep understanding within the community—if your child feels overwhelmed or struggles with social situations, you won’t be met with judgment or disapproving glances. Instead, you’ll find empathy, patience, and unwavering support from those who truly understand.

Beyond Meetups: A Wealth of Support COECT provides members with an online training portal, a well-being programme, and an extensive collection of Trauma-Informed ISSUE 15

Photo: ©Coect via Canva

Parenting resources everything needed to navigate the complex realities of parenting a child affected by trauma. And when the weight feels too heavy, COECT offers one-to-one supportive listening calls, ensuring that no parent ever faces this journey alone.

You are never alone in this," reads one of COECT’s most shared messages of hope. And that’s the heart of it all. Through shared experiences, parents and caregivers grow stronger, discovering that together, healing isn’t just possible—it’s inevitable.

If you’ve ever felt alone in this journey, COECT is here to remind you—you’re not. Through the TIPs membership, a community is waiting to lift you up, share in your struggles, and celebrate your victories.

Membership Benefit

For more information click on the QR code or go to To find out more about our meet-ups click on the link and search “Meet-Ups” For more information click on the QR code or go to https://www.coect.co.uk/ coect-training-events

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Unveiling the New TIPs Hub Membership Written By Joanne Wilson & Danielle Whatling-Gleadall The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma C.I.C. was created to make a meaningful difference in the lives of children and their families. We are grateful to have an experienced team of trainers, social workers, coaches, and therapists who understand firsthand what it means to care for children who have experienced early life trauma or who display neurodiverse characteristics.

We would like to tell you more about the new membership for individual and corporate members, which gives access to our Trauma-Informed Parents hub or TIPS Hub for short. We are Joanne and Danielle, and we are based at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma’s Head Office in Gloucestershire on the outskirts of the Cotswolds.

As Operations Manager, Joanne ensures our internal systems and processes run smoothly so our team can support our members best. By streamlining operations, managing resources, and improving workflows, helping to create a stable foundation that allows our services and events to be delivered efficiently and effectively, always with our members’ needs in mind.

Danielle serves as our Corporate Membership & Events Coordinator.

She is the primary point of contact for our corporate members and assists them in customising their support and training for the members they have registered. Additionally, Danielle plays a vital role behind the scenes during our events and annual conferences, working alongside our other Director Kathryn to ensure everything runs smoothly on the day!

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Photo: ©Coect

Supporting Parents Through Challenges We understand that parenting can be difficult, particularly in complex situations. Our commitment is to equip parents with the necessary tools and guidance to successfully navigate the journey of parenthood.

Our new membership integrates Therapeutic Parenting, TraumaInformed Training, a Wellbeing Platform focused on recovery from and prevention of compassion fatigue, along with peer support, all in one comprehensive package.

Here’s what we provide for parents: Help and Support Our therapeutic services are designed to assist families in trauma-informed/therapeutic parenting, interrupt and relieve symptoms of compassion fatigue through a psychosensory technique called Havening® and support those families experiencing child-on-parent violence and contemplating Section 20 (Children Act 1989) where we offer support packages for families on the verge

of crisis, providing parental support during difficult times to support the family to stay together.

Training We offer comprehensive courses on Therapeutic and TraumaInformed Parenting, from managing compassion fatigue, to supporting your child or young person in managing challenging or violent behaviour. We also have an introductory course for individuals who are interested in learning more about or becoming a Trauma-Informed Life Story Work Practitioner.

Training is held online and in person. Do check out our events section to see specific dates and locations of training.

Qualifications As part of our membership, we offer a 25% discount on selected qualifications, including our accredited programs through NCFE CACHE. These qualifications are designed for both parents and professionals, and they range from Levels 1 to 4. Our offerings include courses on therapeutic parenting, traumaT.I.P'S MAGAZINE

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informed life story work, parent coaching, and trauma-informed practitioner qualifications.

Peer Support Our Trauma-Informed Parents Hub membership offers a valuable connection to likeminded parents through support groups known as TIPS Meet-Ups. Each month, you have the chance to meet up with other parents either in person, or virtually.

Online Training Portal Our online training portal offers valuable insights into therapeutic parenting techniques, managing challenging behaviors, and understanding the impact of trauma. It features webinars and resources tailored for both parents and professionals.

Wellbeing Platform The Wellbeing platform assists parents and professionals in addressing compassion fatigue through a variety of resources,

including videos, guided meditations, and self-care tips.

It is designed to complement the therapeutic services we provide, specifically focusing on alleviating the symptoms associated with compassion fatigue.

TIPS Consult & Topical Discussions - Virtual Events Engage in problem-solving strategies with our expert team during our online Q&A sessions.

Additionally, we host monthly virtual discussions on parenting-related topics though our topical discussion event series “Through the Keyhole.”

Family Meet-Ups Join our volunteer-led gatherings where you and your family can connect with others and build a supportive community.

Supportive Listening Calls As part of the TIPS Hub membership, schedule a

monthly supportive listening call whenever you need someone to talk to. Each members is entitled to a 45 minute call every month.

Peer support forums Access trauma-informed parenting strategies and connect with other parents on our member portal or closed Facebook group.

Discounts Benefit from a 25% discount on selected parental support services and qualifications.

For more information or to join as a member, visit our website or contact us today.

We are here to support you to navigate your membership benefits.

Contact us info@coect.co.ik www.coect.co.uk

Photo: ©GThomas

New Limited Series: Trauma Talks – from The Therapeutic Parenting Podcast Written by Gareth Thomas I’m thrilled to announce Trauma Talks — a brand-new, limited-series podcast within The Therapeutic Parenting Podcast, created for anyone parenting or supporting children who have experienced early-life trauma.

Since its launch, the podcast has been downloaded over 500,000 times, and this new series takes the conversation even deeper.

Across the episodes within Trauma Talks, I’m joined by Sarah Naish — a therapeutic parent, trainer, and author of several best-selling books on therapeutic parenting — and Sarah Dillon — a therapist, author, and keynote speaker specialising in ISSUE 15

developmental trauma, fostering, and adoption. We’ll also be welcoming a range of special guests throughout the series.

Together, we explore the raw, honest, and often messy realities of trauma and therapeutic parenting — and what actually helps. Expect honest conversations, practical insight, and the kind of connection that reminds you you’re not alone.

🎧 Listen and subscribe:

www.coect.co.uk/podcasts or tell your smart speaker to play The Therapeutic Parenting Podcast to listen to previous episodes, and subscribe to get this new series.

Whether you’re a foster parent, adoptive parent, kinship carer, or working in education, social care, or mental health — Trauma Talks is for you.

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TIPS MEET-UPS

Introducing Our New Peer Support Groups We are excited to announce our new peer support groups, which are hosted in cafés, community rooms and green spaces across the UK.

Our virtual support groups are organised on a monthly basis. Keep an eye out for a regional online group, where you can connect with others prior to attending an inperson event.

There are also opportunities to create your own local “village of support”.

For more information click on the QR code or go to https://www.coect.co.uk/coect-training-events and search “Meet-Ups” ISSUE 15

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UPCOMING EVENTS In- Person Training MAY - JULY 2025 Exploring the Foundations of Attachment Tuesday 17th June 2025 - 10:00 am – 1:00 pm (BST) Carmarthenshire First Steps in Therapeutic Parenting Wednesday 25th June 2025 - 10:00 am – 1:00 pm (BST) Bath First Steps in Therapeutic Parenting Tuesday 1st July 2025 - 10:00 am – 1:00 pm (BST) Manchester Exploring the Foundations of Attachment Thursday 3rd July 2025 – 10:00 am – 1:00 pm (BST) Essex

Managing Feelings for Parents (CF) Wednesday 9th July 2025 – 10:00 am – 1:00 pm (BST) Bristol Managing Feelings for Supporting Professionals (CF) Wednesday 9th July 2025 - 2:00 pm – 5:00 pm (BST) Bristol

Compassion Fatigue Day Retreat Friday 11th July 2025 – 10:00 am – 4:00 pm (BST) Brockworth, Gloucestershire

Managing Challenging & Violent Behaviour at Home for Parents Tuesday 15th & Wednesday 16th July 2025 10: 00 am – 4:00 pm (BST) Cardiff For more information click on the QR code or go to https://www.coect.co.uk/coect-training-events

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UPCOMING EVENTS VIRTUAL TRAINING DATES MAY - JULY 2025 The A-Z of Trauma-Informed Teaching – Controlling Behaviours & Defiance Wednesday 21st May 2025 - 4.00 pm (BST)

The A-Z of Trauma-Informed Teaching – Coparenting Thursday 5th June 2025 - 4.00 pm (BST) Through the keyhole - Summer Holidays Prep Friday 6th June 2025 - 12 noon - 1pm

The A-Z of Trauma-Informed Teaching – Damaging and Disruption Tuesday 17th June 2025 - 4.00 pm (BST) The A-Z of Trauma-Informed Teaching – Emotional Age & Regulation Monday 30th June 2025 - 4.00 pm (BST)

Through the Keyhole – Compassion Fatigue in Summer Holidays Friday 4th July 2025 - 12 noon (BST)

The A-Z of Trauma-Informed Teaching – False Allegations Thursday 10th July 2025 - 4.00 pm (BST)

The A-Z of Trauma-Informed Teaching – Holidays Friday 18th July 2025 - 4.00 pm (BST)

For more information click on the QR code or go to https://www.coect.co.uk/coect-training-events

Desperate to Belong My fragile heart is broken Locked inside a cage Shattered through rejection Defended by my rage

How can you achieve this I hear you think out loud You’ve told me that you want me You love me and you’re proud

Fear that you wont love me Will make me move away Scared that you will hurt me Surviving every day

Before I can receive it Firstly you must recognise That I just don’t believe it It may take many years

Trapped inside my body Memories of the past Terror coursing through me My time with you won’t last

Validate my feelings Let me know you see Why I sabotage connection Warmth and empathy

Searching for acceptance A home where I belong More than just a focus On all that I do wrong

Help me build a story An honest gift of why I push you all away And don’t appear to try

A family where I’m wanted A place where I can stay Not terrified of settling Till they make me go away

I haven’t learned to do this Trust that you will be A ever present source Of comfort and safety

A home that offers nurture Where adults see behind My challenging behaviour To the lonely child inside

Therapeutic Parenting will give you what you need To see beyond my armour so we can both succeed You’ll interrupt the cycle of other kids like me Desperate to belong in a forever family

Although I say I hate you Surely you can see The one I really hate Is evidently me!

Thrown around the system Will never solve the issue My behaviours will reduce When I’m certain I’ll stay with you

Written By Sarah Dillon ©2025

www.coect.co.uk