Tucson Weekly, June 17, 2021 by Times Media Group

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Border Visions Virtual art exhibit ‘THIRST 2021’ raises funds for humanitarian organizations By Christina Duran INSIDE: Senior Resource Guide

TUCSON SALVAGE: Surviving a Tucson Summer on the Streets

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JUNE 17, 2021 | VOL. 36, NO. 24

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STAFF

CONTENTS CURRENTS

Virtual art exhibit ‘Thirst for Humanity’ raises funds for humanitarian organizations No Más Muertes and Casa Alitas

TUCSON SALVAGE

Surviving a Tucson summer on the streets

CHOW

Flora’s Market crudo bar elevates the raw food conversation

CITY WEEK

ADMINISTRATION Steve T. Strickbine, Publisher Michael Hiatt, Vice President

EDITOR’S NOTE

Jaime Hood, General Manager, jaime@tucsonlocalmedia.com Tyler Vondrak, Associate Publisher, tyler@tucsonlocalmedia.com

SENIOR SUPPORT

Claudine Sowards, Accounting, claudine@tucsonlocalmedia.com Sheryl Kocher, Receptionist, sheryl@tucsonlocalmedia.com

OVER THE LAST YEAR, THE pandemic was especially cruel to seniors. Not only was COVID-19 more deadly to older Arizonans, but stay-at-home directives and other coronavirus restrictions meant many seniors were cut off from their social life and even visits with family. Home health services—the folks who help care for seniors so they can remain in their own homes as they age rather than needing to move into an assisted-living facility—also struggled to provide services. This week’s special section looks at some of those challenges and includes a listing of resources to aid the older residents in our community. Elsewhere in the book this week: staff reporter Christina Duran looks at THIRST for Humanity, a virtual art exhibit whose proceeds will benefit humanitarian aid organizations such as No More Deaths and Casa Alitas, which serves as a waystation for the refugees who are seeking asylum in the United States; Tucson Salvage columnist Brian Smith spends some time with a homeless man trying to get by in the Tucson summer; food writer Matt Russell takes a look at the Crudo raw food bar at Flora’s Market Run,

which has recently opened in the old Rincon Market space; Tucson Weedly columnist David Abbott looks at an upcoming clinic designed to help people clear their record of past marijuana offenses; calendar editor Emily Dieckman tells you about things to do in our town, even in these sizzling summer days; sex columnist Dan Savage answers questions from his European readers, ooh-la-la; and, of course, we have the usual collections of cartoons, columns and other diversions to keep your busy as you flip through our pages. One more important note: Best of Tucson® voting is underway, so head over to TucsonWeekly.com and cast your ballot for your favorite people, places and things in this town. We can’t do it without you! — Jim Nintzel Executive Editor Hear Nintz talk about the latest on the outbreak and other news at 8:30 Wednesday mornings on The Frank Show on KLPX, 91.1 FM.

RANDOM SHOTS By Rand Carlson

EDITORIAL Jim Nintzel, Executive Editor, jimn@tucsonlocalmedia.com Jeff Gardner, Managing Editor, jeff@tucsonlocalmedia.com Mike Truelsen, Web Editor, mike@tucsonlocalmedia.com Christina Duran, Staff Reporter, christinad@tucsonlocalmedia.com Ireland Stevenson, Staff Reporter, istevenson@tucsonlocalmedia.com Contributors: David Abbott, Rob Brezsny, Max Cannon, Rand Carlson, Tom Danehy, Emily Dieckman, Bob Grimm, Andy Mosier, Linda Ray, Margaret Regan, Will Shortz, Jen Sorensen, Clay Jones, Dan Savage PRODUCTION Courtney Oldham, Production Manager, tucsonproduction@timespublications.com Ryan Dyson, Graphic Designer, ryand@tucsonlocalmedia.com Emily Filener, Graphic Designer, emilyf@tucsonlocalmedia.com CIRCULATION Alex Carrasco, Circulation, alexc@tucsonlocalmedia.com ADVERTISING TLMSales@TucsonLocalMedia.com Kristin Chester, Account Executive, kristin@tucsonlocalmedia.com Candace Murray, Account Executive, candace@tucsonlocalmedia.com Lisa Hopper, Account Executive, lisa@tucsonlocalmedia.com NATIONAL ADVERTISING VMG Advertising, (888) 278-9866 or (212) 475-2529 Tucson Weekly® is published every Thursday by Times Media Group at 7225 N. Mona Lisa Rd., Ste. 125, Tucson, Arizona. Address all editorial, business and production correspondence to: Tucson Weekly, 7225 N. Mona Lisa Rd., Ste. 125, Tucson, Arizona 85741. Phone: (520) 797-4384, FAX (520) 575-8891. First Class subscriptions, mailed in an envelope, cost $112 yearly/53 issues. Sorry, no refunds on subscriptions. Member of the Association of Alternative Newsmedia (AAN). The Tucson Weekly® and Best of Tucson® are registered trademarks of Times Media Group. Back issues of the Tucson Weekly are available for $1 each plus postage for the current year. Publisher has the right to refuse any advertisement at his or her discretion.

Local music, food and art events this week

TUCSON WEEDLY

Local clinics helping people clear past cannabis convictions

Cover photo by Lacey Wolf

Copyright: The entire contents of Tucson Weekly are Copyright Times Media Group No portion may be reproduced in whole or part by any means without the express written permission of the Publisher, Tucson Weekly, 7225 N. Mona Lisa Rd., Ste. 125, Tucson, AZ 85741.

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CURRENTS

COURTESY PHOTO

“From the Ethers” by Lacey Wolf is on exhibit in THIRST 2021.

BORDER VISIONS

Virtual art exhibit THIRST 2021 raises funds for humanitarian organizations No Más Muertes and Casa Alitas By Christina Duran christinad@tucsonlocalmedia.com IN A SOLO MARCH, FORMER Tucsonan Cassandra Kehoe walked down the streets of her Oregon neighborhood dressed as a weeping Statue of Liberty, holding a sign with the number Self Serve All You Care to Eat Returning June 29th!

“545”—the number, at the time, of known missing children separated from their families at the border. This is not the first or the last time Kehoe—an attorney and artist and the daughter of an Argentinian immigrant— used art as activism, but this act inspired her to bring together artists from across the country to support their art and a

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cause close to her heart. Kehoe curated THIRST 2021: Artists for Humanitarian Aid, a virtual event and shop that gathered more than 80 artists to create art to raise awareness and funds for Tucson-based humanitarian-aid nonprofits. “Just knowing the power of art as activism, I just thought I’m going to continue to do this,” said Kehoe, “and then it became, ‘one person doing something is great but if we have a collective of it, it’s amazing.’” While living in Tucson, Kehoe learned about the work of No Más Muertes, the nonprofit organization which has left water jugs throughout the desert on migrant paths in the Southern Arizona desert since 2004. She also closely followed the 2017 trial of Dr. Scott Warren, who was charged with a felony for providing humanitarian aid. (A jury deadlocked on his 2017 trial; when prosecutors retried Warren in 2019, the jury acquitted him.) “It’s a combination of kind of their spirit, of just this, ‘I care for you as a human and I’m doing this work on behalf of humanity and it doesn’t matter which side of the border you come from, right, it’s that you’re human, that you have blood in your veins and you have a heart.’ And these really brave amazing volunteers going out into the desert and dropping water. It’s such powerful work that they do,” said Kehoe. Before the pandemic, Kehoe also volunteered at Casa Alitas, which provides a temporary shelter for people seeking asylum. Since the pandemic limited the opportunities to volunteer, Kehoe created this event to connect many to support their efforts. Kehoe chose No Más Muertes and Casa Alitas because of their commitment to not only humanity through active humanitarianism, but also the embodiment of transformation. “It’s one thing to continue to try to change something that is in its way or fund supportive ways of being, but I think it’s something else to say, there’s a different future that we can have and there’s a different way of being that we could have, a different way of treating each other. It’s possible,” said Kehoe. “Both of the organizations are transformative in the vision that they see and it’s a vision that I share with them too.” In a grassroots effort, Kehoe reached out through Instagram and personal letters to find artists that would share the same vision.

“It was definitely an invitation for those who are called to really serve and help and be part of the movement of being humanitarian, what it means to be human and to not destroy humanitarian aid at our borders and those who are not comfortable and not OK with the idea of family separation policies and just wanting to make a difference in their way,” said Kehoe. THROUGH OTHERS’ INSTAGRAM stories, Tucson-based artist Nadia Anais de Stefano found the call for artists and decided to join. Stefano has always been tied to the border and Mexico through her family’s own experiences. Her great-grandfather came to the U.S. through the Bracero Program, created from a bi-lateral agreement between the U.S. and Mexico during WWII that allowed Mexican men to work on short-term agricultural contracts. Her grandfather, now a citizen, came to the U.S. illegally. “These generations that have progressively started to lose an understanding of where we came from and a lot of people don’t know about the complexities behind the issue now. Now it’s not necessarily so much about people just trying to find a new life, but lots of people in many Latin American countries are fleeing violence,” said Stefano. “I just became so interested in wanting to learn where I came from and the history. It’s also taboo to talk about, and shameful to talk about that we came from more poverty or some relatives of ours may have crossed illegally.” Because of her family’s history, Stefano felt the need to learn and volunteer for humanitarian aid efforts. In her early teens, Stefano completed No More Deaths training with her mother and dropped off water jugs in the desert. In high school she volunteered at a comedor in Nogales, and recently volunteered with Tucson Samaritans placing crosses in the desert to commemorate those who have died. Stefano submitted four art pieces for the project, displaying different aspects of the humanitarian cause, with one set of earrings made to look like the water jugs she helped No Más Muertes leave in the desert. Like those gallons, Stefano wrote the words of hope “Si se puede,” which translates to “Yes, it can be done.” Artists could create art based around the theme of water, a nod to the work of No More Deaths, but had no obligation

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to follow the theme. Stefano made all her art after finding out about THiRST 2021 and designed the pieces for the event. Stefano also created earrings showcasing the monarch butterfly’s wings, a common symbol for migration, and used turquoise beads above the wings to symbolize water as well as a “protective stone for travellers.” Stefano has two different versions of her “Voyage Earrings,” with one including the moon as migrants often travel at night. On one of her last trips while leaving crosses in the desert, Stefano found a tortillero, a cloth used to wrap tortillas to keep them warm, emblazoned with the words: “Sin Ti No Puedo Vivir,” or “without you I cannot live.” After learning about THIRST 2021, Stefano decided to create art out of tortillas to accompany the cloth she found. She covered three tortillas with multi-colored flowers, gold and silver lead in resin and wrote one stanza of poetry on each tortilla. Stefano was surprised the art sold in the show; she said she just wanted to create a piece that called back to the artifact she found and was happy her art resonated with someone. “I’m hoping that with the little bit of symbolism in there that could bring more awareness to the common symbols and themes that are seen and maybe

provide background into the symbols and then to what people experience who cross,” said Stefano. UNLIKE STEFANO, TUCSON-BASED fine artist and photographer Lacey Wolf is not intimately connected to the border, but has supported the work of No Más Muertes. “I can’t imagine going through what the migrants have to go through to get across the border. It’s something that I’ve thought about a lot, especially through COVID and the pandemic,” said Wolf. “Our desert is so, so hot, and so difficult to survive in that it’s just a cause that has always had my heart. I believe that the right to live and the right to live happily and safely and with good health is something that everyone should be afforded.” Through her art, Wolf explores mortality, the transience of life, and the concept of “memento mori,” (Latin for “remember you must die’’), which expresses the inevitability of death. Wolf submitted two photographs from this series, one inspired from Tucson’s All Souls Procession, a celebration of Dia de los Muertos. The photograph, titled “From the Ethers,” features her friend modeling the sugar skull makeup like Catrina, the goddess of death. Wolf also depicts skulls through her second submis-

sion, “Mundemala,” shot at the Sedlec Ossuary in Prague. Known as the “Bone Church,” the Sedlec Ossuary is decorated with the bones and skulls of people buried there. “The decoration of the church is that essentially under God’s eyes, we’re all equal. We’re all the same. Stripped down, our essence is all the same no matter who you are,” said Wolf. From reading on Hindu iconography, Wolf learned about Mundemala, a garland of skulls. The god Shiva is often portrayed wearing the mundemala and is representative of death and destruction, but also rebirth. Wolf saw echoes of that imagery in the iconography of Dia de los Muertos. She said that “From the Ethers” represents “that death and destruction is something that is a natural part of the cycle of life and can also be a really important part of progress. In personal evolution, in politics and social issues, and in the issues of the world, certain structures need to sort of crumble and die first, in order for things to to be reborn. So, when I work with themes of death and the transience of life, while thinking about decay and those sorts of structures, I’m also thinking about how those processes leave room for something better to grow in its place.” THE MAJORITY OF THE participating artists are Tucson-based, but other artists from coast to coast contributed their artwork for this cause and vision. Massachusetts-based Yuko Okabe, while not personally connected to the crisis at the border, is a child of immigrant parents and has previously made social impact-focused work. As a current art fellow collaborating with the community development organization in Salem, Okabe supports their public arts and community engagement programs. At the start of the pandemic, she helped create a call for local artists to support their work, but also create health posters that felt relevant to the communities they worked with. Her other work has also focused on mental health care for children and climate change. “I’ve been kind of pursuing these types of social impact and arts projects or social impact and cultural projects, because I felt like those types of programs really resonated with me and it felt like art had a more impactful way

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of reaching out to people in different ways,” said Okabe. This cause also resonated with Okabe. In the ’80s, her parents immigrated from Japan and “they came in with the idea of building a new life and building a family.” She has seen the photos of children in cages and news reports about people escaping from “horrible and disenfranchised situations,” only to be sent back to those conditions by U.S. authorities. “People are trying to find space all the time,” Okabe said. “It doesn’t go away when you don’t see it. It is nearly always there somewhere in the world. So I think that’s what I’ve been thinking a lot about from this project.” Okabe submitted seven works of art and tried to incorporate at least one that followed the theme. Her piece “Branching Into Life” depicts the story of two children who take hold of the water provided by a single water jug and each stream of water illustrates different phases of their lives, whether they go to school, learn a craft, fall in love or have a family. “All these little streams of water go upwards, and the streams of water kind of act as pillars or even like steps or even like foundations for different parts of these two children’s lives,” said Okabe. “One thing kind of leads to another when you just do this one simple gesture.” IN SUPPORTING THIS CAUSE, Kehoe also sought to create a platform to support artists who may have struggled during the pandemic but wanted to make a difference. “(For) some of them it’s like, ‘I’m not able to financially contribute but I want my art to be part of this,’ and so that was a cool way to say we can support artists and humanitarian aid efforts,” said Kehoe. At the start of the pandemic, Wolf could no longer travel to make photographs and had to cancel many projects in late spring and summer last year because of safety concerns with photographing people in person. She shifted to creating self-portraits and photographing a small group of people. Wolf also found more time to revisit her old work. “I was able to sort of go through a lot of half finished projects and revisit the gems that had stayed buried CONTINUED ON PAGE 6

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BORDER VISIONS

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there, and bring out new work out of some of those old things that I’d worked on,” said Wolf. “For the first time I was able to dedicate myself in a more disciplined way to the practice of making sure that I sit down every single day and touch my art, and connect with it and learn more from it or let it reveal to me what needs to be done or more about about the meaning of it.” For others the pandemic allowed them to re-evaluate their art and themselves as an artist. “I really took the time of the pandemic to really solidify and be able to call myself an artist because I’ve always created art and been producing art and selling art and whatnot, but I never really thought that was a primary way that I would define myself,” said Stefano. Around November of last year, Stefano began making jewelry and selling it in her Etsy shop and now she is embracing her identity as an artist. Okabe has been contemplating eventually opening her own shop, as the pandemic exacerbated feelings of uncertainty while making her consider her autonomy as an artist in a sometimes gig-based industry. “With a lot of things, the pandemic kind of exaggerated the feeling of wanting to explore more personally-led projects and more independently-led projects, not always being reliant on someone to hire me to do something,” said Okabe. The artists set the price for their artwork and the percent of profit that would be donated to No Más Muertes/No More Deaths and Casa Alitas. For each work, people are able to see how much will go to support the artist and their work and how much will be donated to either organization. At the end of the event, the donations will be split between the two nonprofits. “It’s just been a beautiful collective of people coming together with their

hearts,” said Kehoe. “It’s my learned life experiences, and then also just wanting to have a way to really send out that good positive love and communication and raise funds for such an important cause.” On the project’s Instagram account, Kehoe continues to share the art of participating artists. Stefano appreciates the community that was built amongst artists through this project. “The artists who are participating have definitely been exploring each other’s work, or sending messages to each other, commenting on people’s posts,” said Stefano. “Especially since it’s not an in-person thing, it’s extra special to still be able to make those meaningful connections, not only with local artists but artists who are in other parts of the country.” The exhibit has raised more than $7,000 and the majority of the art has been sold, but Kehoe continues to look for artists and hopes to continue adding new pieces and continue raising funds. Kehoe says she tells artists: “Your art is saving lives in its own way.” She add that she does “really, truly believe that artists are powerful and they can change and make movements happen.” ■ The virtual shop will close on June 26. To purchase artwork and donate to these organizations visit thirstforhumanity.com.

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Story & photos by Brian Smith

The Boxer IF EVER EXISTED A CITY BEACON of sugary optimism and hope, it is one of those Dunkin’ Donuts/BaskinRobins combo things, all pink-orange chirpy and bright, and when the hot wind shifts just right, the smell of donuts sweetens the nauseating mix of car exhaust and melting parking-lot tar. Wreaks unholy chaos on an empty stomach. The Tucson intersection is otherwise marked by wholly universal cheerlessness, the 24-hour Walgreens, a BBVA bank, a closed auto-detailing joint. Wait there in the shadeless, 106-degree parking lot like you’re a cop, or like you’re copping, or like you’re waiting for some midday action, any action and there he is, moving by some internal force, pacing, between the Dunkin’ Donuts/ Baskin-Robins sign (whose flashing message board reads “Order ahead and skip the wait”) and the shaded bus-stop. Soon there is some assessment of the enemy, the corner traffic-signal pole, an elbow bump. Like a boxer he leaps a few steps back, featherweight-thin in a red bandit scarf, and lowers into fighter position, fists up, feet apart, and he fires, knuckles cracking street metal in precise rhythm, um-bip-bip, um bip-bip, yeah. He jumps back, satisfied, spins once, and again, fists pulled to face, this time a two-step dance, and, um bipbip, um bip-bip, yeah ... If that official Department of Transportation pole were a person, he’d be down, man. A snow-haired dude in a cowboy hat and crappy white pickup with a droopy front bumper parks at Dunkin’, steps out and takes a seat beneath the chintzy orange awning, a meager overhang that only implies shade but hardly guards against bird shit, a cosmetic prop, like they don’t really want people hanging

around out front in daylight. He doesn’t notice the boxer. A woman lecturing her son, hard-pointing a finger in his face, at the head of traffic waiting at the red street light, SUV air-conditioning blowing her hair back, doesn’t see the boxer, though he’s right there. In fact, the maybe hundred people in all directions at that busy intersection, in that moment, would see him, if they looked. There is no audience, and like something Paul Simon once sang, his story is seldom told. Then the boxer sees green flash, vanishes across the street into a blur of storefronts at Grant Road and Swan. He reappears later across the street in the outdoor shade shelter of the closed auto boutique, long ago a gas station. The boxer is A.G., “A.G. Gonzales.” His aesthetic shows self-care, careful street-samurai lines, a hoodie hangs from his head, a knife and bandanas dangle from beltloops, black cyclist gloves decorate his hands. He wears white, sturdy construction-site boots, keeps his clothes folded neatly inside his two shopping carts, which are tied back to front and also contain boxes, backpacks and a serrated machete on the side, handle out. Hand sanitizer on top. There are six others here, men and women, young and tough-wrinkled, huddled for the shade and the one working electrical outlet, their belongings and bagged ice, food items and loam. Veiled, tired and patient as livestock, as if waiting to be told what they’re doing wrong. The summer gawps before them— the run-on scorcher days, the plod of hours a vacuum, the traffic’s constant ugly sizzle the shittiest song you can think of stuck on repeat, blasting from

A.G., hanging but ready.

invisible speakers. There’s indifference here, adept and smooth, and a few come and go, all energy subsumed into the horrors of street-living, that vain search for a tiny modicum of comfort. Might as well be handcuffed to a heating pipe. Yet there’s peace and contribution here, a place where the have-nots share and reveal so much more—hell, everything— than the haves. It is unwritten benevolence, easy to see they value one another—there’s an unspoken domestic bond, a kind of family surety in what they are communally. A young woman with a fascinating swirl of a thigh tattoo, seafaring greens and blues, steps over and hands Gonzales a full container of apple juice. Another asks if he’d like banana chips. The collection of folks are not friends exactly, Gonzales calls them acquaintances, yet he trusts them with his carts if he steps away, his knowing sense of people, how to detach from the “liars and the thieves.” One guy with tremendous Jesus hair massages the back, shoulders and stomach of a woman perched on a front curb, the tenderness softens her face under long blond locks, exposing some urgent need.

Gonzales talks and doesn’t elaborate on much, as if he sees himself as a sequence of hand-me-down anecdotes, a disconnect from himself and the world: He never met his father, has no desire to. He’s 29 and been homeless for 10 years, been jailed (“everyone has”) for trespassing, and is often hassled by cops to move along (“they’re trying to get us to go northwest of here.”) He suffers hard from PTSD, “abandonment issues” mostly; his mother had “her own life” when he was growing up, and she now stays somewhere in Tucson, he doesn’t know where. He has siblings but talks only to one, a sister, who helps him with money sometimes, and on a rare day, when there is nothing left to share, he’ll fly a sign on a corner for handouts. His Spanish is OK, which helps. Born in Tucson, attended high school somewhere on “the east side” and studied for a GED, and the last time he laughed was yesterday, and it was a good one. “We have our shows,” he nods, “and I rap some.” Gonzales suffers from bi-polar, ADHD, multi-personality disorder, “all of it.” And the doctors? “They never helped.” CONTINUED ON PAGE 8

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“Honestly,” the boyish man says, “I’ve been doing this too long, I’m tired of it.” He pulls his scarf down for conversation clarity and a strikingly handsome face is revealed, that prepossessing blend of Native American and Hispanic genes did him many favors, the dark features, sharp with bits of facial growth, and considering the decade of insufferable hard road, he looks younger than his years. When Gonzales stands still, his wiry frame gives the sense it could buckle under the pressure of the act. When he moves, he’s boxer lissome. Makes sense, given the constant street hassles and persecutions, the unprovoked run-ins with right-wing assholes and elitist liberals. “It’s not like we’re hassling them. Some want to help the community—the good side—yet they still make us out to be the bad guys. A lot of us do nothing to hurt or steal from anyone. Why be rude to us? “They get to be in a house,” he continues. “We have to make ours. They get to go to work every day, take a shower every day. “We’re hurting. He adds after a moment, “I’m not houseless. I’m homeless. I can build a little house where I sleep with cardboard and my shopping carts.” Gonzales’ street boxing is release, a kind of subsistence, a frustration in the wounds of a life so learned he can hardly recognize them. The machete and knife guard against that, though he insists he’s never had to

A.G. in the fight.

pull them on anyone, “but you never know.” He gave up looking for work after a few under-thetable jobs years ago. Beyond intellectual disabilities, someone out here stole his birth certificate and ID, another absolute nightmare to negotiate. He has nothing to show who the hell he is. And he won’t hock stolen goods, himself or drugs: “Hell no. That will lead you to jail, death. That’s crazy. My only drug is cigarettes and weed, which isn’t even a drug anymore, if I can get it.” Fear of self relieves some struggles as much as amplifies the others. He’ll explode if he goes to jail, or gets locked in handcuffs, or is sheltered in a temporary home like Salvation Army. There’s the claustrophobia for one, the PTSD. “It’s better that I don’t, I don’t know what could happen. I’ll have blackouts so I don’t know what the outcome will be in the morning.” He pulls a half-melted popsicle from a cellophane wrapper, the last from a box shared among his acquaintances. “Ok, I’m going to get on with my day,” he says, biting into what’s left of the thing, careful not spill the red liquid on himself. He half-grins, “I’m waiting to talk to some people who owe me money.” And the boxer steps to his grim shopping-cart motorcade, arranges a few things on top, and moves to begin the fight again, at least until the gift of nightfall arrives. He turns and says, “The world is corrupt, people are intrigued by violence. It’s one big mystery.” ■

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JUNE 17, 2021

CHOW

Torched Ahi. The raw fish is rubbed with togarashi, a Japanese spice blend, and torched to produce a light crust. It’s plated with watermelon that’s been compressed to produce the same deep red color as the ahi and then dressed with a cherry blossom-infused soy sauce. “This is a nice, bright, cooling, perfect for the summer crudo,” he said. “And what’s fun is when the ahi and watermelon take on the same color, some people can’t tell the difference visually between the two. The Crudo Bar also has an option for landlubbers, and the Kobe Wagyu Beef is a carnivorous variation on the crudo theme. It starts with shaved raw Wagyu beef from Texas which is COURTESY PHOTO topped with fried Brussels sprouts, Flora’s Kobe Wagyu Beef is a carnivorous variation on the crudo theme. fried chiles and roasted peanuts, and dressed with a sweet ponzu sauce. “The Wagyu gives you all of that great marbling and fat, which is a nice contrast to the crunch from the Brussels and peanuts, as well as from Flora’s Market Crudo Bar elevates the raw food conversation the chiles that we cook down for hours, frying them in their own oil to render a dark, crispy, Sambal-style sauce,” he posed dish,” said Nottingham. “There said. are elements of acid, of fat, of texture, Rounding out the Crudo Bar menu By Matt Russell and it’s about taking the nuances of are Oysters Al Fresca, a rotating setucsonweekly@tucsonlocalmedia.com whatever raw fish you’re working with lection of raw oysters that are sourced and amplifying it with other ingredifrom the waters of some of the world’s ents.” oyster capitals. They’re served with To further amplify the offering, Not- mignonettes, horseradish, hot sauce, ONLY FOUR DISHES AT THE NEW tingham brought longtime fish monFlora’s Market Run restaurant constiand lemon. ger Jamie TeBockhorst to the Flora’s tute the Crudo Bar section of its 25“We don’t just look at what oysters dish menu, yet there are three full-time team after 20 years of seafood superin- are available, we only bring in those employees dedicated exclusively to its tendency at Canyon Ranch. that meet our harvest date specifica“Jamie brings an incredible amount tions,” he said. “We’re highlighting operations. of knowledge and close relationships Crudo means “raw” in Italian, and a different oyster almost every other with sustainable purveyors which this kind of staffing ratio suggests night.” that the raw fish element of the Flora’s makes our fish program pretty impresConsider going crudo on your next story is as significant as the wood-fired sive,” he said. “He’s a big deal.” visit to Flora’s Market Run. Start with a Leading off the Crudo Bar menu is pizza, house-made pasta, grilled meats dish or two before you dive into a Merthe Hamachi Crudo, with raw yellowand other elements. cado Pizza, the Short Rib Bolognese, or tail, fresh citrus, and a grapefruit, orAt the center of the story is Kyle the Sumac-Crusted Lamb. You might ange and sesame vinaigrette. The dish find that raw can really be rad. ■ Nottingham, chef/partner with Tucis topped with thinly sliced serrano son-based Ares Collective, which owns and operates Flora’s Market Run chiles, fresh greens and Maldon salt. Contact Matt Russell, whose day job “This is a simple and light dish with is CEO of Russell Public Communicaat 2513 E. Sixth Street. But he’s not talking about items that you might see a crunch of salinity from the salt,” he tions, at mrussell@russellpublic.com. at a conventional raw bar. He’s talking said. “Hamachi is a delicate fish and Russell is also the publisher of OnThewe didn’t want to overcomplicate it.” crudo, a chef-driven program which MenuLive.com as well as the host of the Tuna has a starring role on the elevates the raw food conversation. Friday Weekend Watch segment on the “Crudo is really a balanced and com- Crudo Bar menu as well with the “Buckmaster Show” on KVOI 1030 AM.

SAVE THE SEAR

By Jeff Gardner jeff@tucsonlocalmedia.com

Pacific Northwest at Kingfisher. Kingfisher Bar & Grill is continuing its Summer road trip series with a taste of the Pacific Northwest. Although you can’t escape Tucson’s heat into those foggy trees, their serving of regional seafood may help distract you if only for a little while. Kingfisher will be serving up Alaskan halibut, steelhead trout, fried oysters, smoked salmon belly, and cobbler for dessert. Their Pacific Northwest menu runs through Saturday, June 26. And after that, get ready for the food of the Great Plains and Midwest. Their Summer Road trip, with various regional menus, runs through the beginning of September. 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. Tuesday through Saturday. Closed Sunday and Monday. 2564 E. Grant Road. Father’s Day at the Cup Cafe. Aside from being a nice rhyme, the Cup Cafe is serving up plenty of big specialty dishes for Father’s Day. Their specials start with a slow-roasted honey sage prime rib, topped with au jus, along with bbq grilled shrimp, smoked cheddar grits cake and grilled white asparagus all for $32. Or, you can treat dad to a Monte Cristo with pit ham, house smoked turkey, Swiss cheese, and raspberry habanero compote with choice of side all for $22. Take him out for dinner, that way it seems like you didn’t forget a gift. 311 E. Congress Street.

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JUNE 17, 2021

by Emily Dieckman Space Wars. It’s been over a year since the Gaslight Theatre did an indoor melodrama. They did some really incredible outdoor shows, which you could enjoy from your car. But there’s nothing like the atmosphere inside the Gaslight Theatre. For their first show back (with limited capacity seating), they’re doing this parody of Star Wars. Do Duke Starfighter, Princess Layla and the rest of the Rebels have what it takes to stop the Evil Dark Visor from destroying the universe? The wisdom of Yoga (the little green sage dude) enough to keep Duke on the Course, is it? Only one way to find out, and it’s INDOORS! May the Farce Be With You. Showing most Wednesdays through Sundays through Aug. 29. (Most of June is already sold out!) Gaslight Theatre, 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. $23.95 adults, $21.95 seniors/students/ military, $13.95 kids.

are we excited. Headliner Jimmy Callaway, in from Los Angeles, is sharing his energetic, irreverent, surprising and witty humor. (He’s also the author of Lupo Danish Never Has Nightmares, a superhero-gangster novel.) Roxy Merari hosts, and a slew of local favorites are doing sets as well. Take dad out for a laugh, or just take yourself out for a laugh. They’re also offering a livestream option if you aren’t yet ready to attend in-person (or if Dad lives far away and you want to tune in together). 7 p.m. Sunday, June 20. Surly Wench Pub, 424 N. Fourth Ave. $15.

Gallery of Food Bodega Grand Opening. Kristine Jensen was the chef behind the Tucson Botanical Garden’s fantastic Café Botanica. When the restaurant closed during the pandemic, she launched with local purveyors like Pivot Produce, Barrio Bread and Top-Knot Farms to create a super cool weekly delivery service, through which people can sign up to receive fruits and veggies, meats, breads, and dishes made by Gallery of Food Chef Christopher Baldwin. Now, Jensen is launching a beautiful market, full of locally sourced, hand-crafted items—including all the goodies from the online shopping list and more. The grand opening features live music, a store and kitchen tour and plenty of shopping. Noon to 6 p.m. Sunday, June 20. Gallery of Food Bodega, 2522 E. Fort Lowell Road.

Summer Safari Nights: Large and In Charge. If you attended Summer Safari Nights last weekend, then it’s already been almost a whole week since you got a Reid Park Zoo fix, and we can imagine you must be ready for another. This week’s focus is on some of the zoo’s biggest animals, such as the giraffes, rhinos and lions. And of course, their elephant Mabu, who is the largest resident of Arizona at over 13,000 pounds! Wear a muscle shirt if you want to go along with the theme, or just bring a smile and be ready for some fun. Tonight’s live music is classic rock, rock ’n’ roll, blues and country covers by Jamie’s Gang. As always, the night also features games and wildlife activities, food and drink specials, and carousel rides. 5:30 to 8 p.m. Saturday, June 19. Reid Park Zoo, 3400 Zoo Court. $10.50 adults, $8.50 seniors, $6.50 kids ages 2 to 14.

Comedy at the Wench: Back in Person! It’s been 17 months since this comedy act has actually taken place on the Surly Wench Pub stage, and boy

Cool Saturday Nights at the Desert Museum. Sometimes we Arizonans

are so exhausted at the end of summer days, just from trying to SURVIVE in the oppressive heat, that we forget it gets a little bit nicer outside after dark. Plus, there’s all sorts of interesting wildlife to see, like bats and glow-inthe-dark scorpions. Over at the Desert Museum, you can also watch the beavers splash around and spend some time with the stingrays. On Saturdays throughout June, they’re open until 9 p.m. Time it right to watch the sunset fade into a sky full of stars, then wander around with a local beer and marvel at all the sights. 7:30 a.m. to 9 p.m. Saturday, June 19. Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum, 2021 N. Kinney Road. $23.95 GA, with discounts for youth, seniors, military and Arizona/ Sonora residents. Tucson Sugar Skulls vs. Massachusetts Pirates. The Sugar Skulls are Tucson’s indoor football team, part of the Indoor Football League. There are 17 teams in the IFL, and this year marks the league’s 13th consecutive season of play. Ever seen an indoor football game? It’s not so different than outdoor football—in fact, IFL players have been known to go on to the NFL. The “field,” an indoor padded surface, is 85 feet wide and 50 yards long, with eight-yard endzones. Goal posts are 9 feet wide with a crossbar height of 15 feet. Whether you’re a football fan or completely new to sports, the team is worth checking out, and certainly worth rooting for. Go Sugar Skulls! 6:05 p.m. Saturday, June 19. Tucson Arena, 260 S. Church Ave. $17 to $91. Quilts in the Garden. We know and love the Tucson Botanical Gardens as a place that’s bursting with color. This summer, the plants aren’t the only source of rainbows at the garden. Handmade quilts from the local charity Quilt for a Cause are hanging throughout the garden’s indoor spaces—including the gift shop, the legacy gallery and the education classroom. And all of them are for sale! Quilt for a Cause often raises money to support breast and gynecological screening and treatment, but the proceeds from this display will be donated to the Tucson Botanical Gardens to help care

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for the gardens. Pop in to say hi. You might just leave with a new quilt! On display through Sept. 19 at the Tucson Botanical Gardens, 2150 N. Alvernon Way. Hours are 7:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. daily. $15 adults, $13 students/seniors/ military, $8 kids 4 to 17.

Mark Insley and the Broken Angels. The Rhythm and Roots concert series at Hotel Congress continues this week with a performance by Mark Insley, a mainstay in Americana music for over 20 years. Insley has four albums under his belt—including Tucson, which spent 10 weeks in the Top-10 of an Americana music chart. His most recent album, Ten Cent Redemption, was recorded last year in Tucson, live, in one take, in just a little over five hours. His high-energy music and outlaw-style country will be a balm for your tired soul. 7:30 to 9:30 p.m. Tuesday, June 22. Hotel Congress Plaza, 311 E. Congress. $8. Friday Night Concerts at Little Anthony’s Diner. There’s nothing like a meal at a diner on a summer night, you know? A nice big burger with crisp lettuce and tomato, a heaping side of fries, and a malt to finish the meal off. This summer, pair a meal at Little Anthony’s Diner with a chance to see some live music. The atmosphere at these shows is so fun. Don’t be shy if you want to start dancing in the parking lot! This week’s band is Johnnie and the Rumblers, a trio specializing in classic rock, blues and a little bit of country. 7 to 9 p.m. Friday, June 18. Little Anthony’s Diner, 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. Free.

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JUNE 17, 2021

SPINNING RECORDS

Local clinics help people clear past cannabis convictions By David Abbott david@tucsonlocalmedia.com WHEN ARIZONA VOTERS WENT TO the polls last November to legalize cannabis via Prop 207, they not only opened the door to recreational marijuana use, but also expungement of pot-related convictions for nearly 200,000 residents. As the July 12 start date for qualified individuals to submit petitions to clear their records nears, clinics designed to help navigate the system have begun to pop up around the state. In the Tucson area, cannabis entrepreneur Zsa Zsa Simone Brown will provide information at a Tucson Urban League Young Professionals Juneteenth event on Saturday, June 19, and Southern Arizona NORML will host a free Expungement Resource Clinic at Harambe Café in Tucson on Saturday, July 3. The Arizona Department of Public Safety reported that as of June 2020, there are more than 192,000 residents with low-level pot charges that can be expunged, although the number of people expected to follow through with petitions is expected to be a fraction of that number, according to analysis by the Joint Legislative Budget Committee in 2020. The Medical Marijuana Fund will provide $4 million to help facilitate the expungement process to be distributed by yet-unidentified nonprofits that applied to the Arizona Department of Health Services last month. Anyone with an existing conviction that has been decriminalized or made legal with the passage of 207 can be have their records eliminated and sealed, including charges or convictions for possession of up to 2.5 ounces of flower or up to 12.5 grams of concentrate, possession of paraphernalia, or a charge of growing up to six plants for personal

consumption. A Southern Arizona NORML board member, Brown will participate in the Juneteenth event, not as a NORML representative, but as a Black businesswoman who hopes to expand opportunities for people of color in what is expected to be a multi-billion-dollar cannabis industry. “Petty cannabis crimes can scar peoples’ lives just because of possession of medicine,” she said. “Why should these people have their lives ruined while other people in the industry are getting rich? This is an opportunity for people to have a life after cannabis.” Brown is a member of a group calling itself Acre 41, composed of four “influential female Black, Indigenous, and people of color” who hope to procure one of 26 social equity licenses, but also advocate for underserved communities in the growing cannabis market. Acre 41 alludes to the idea that “not only is it time for the long-promised 40 acres and a mule to Blacks, it is time for an extra acre—41 acres,” according to a May 7 press release from the group. The Juneteenth celebration, hosted by the Tucson Urban League Young Professionals, will take place from 4 to 8 p.m. at the Dunbar Pavilion, 325 W. Second St. Brown will offer information about the expungement process, but also about business opportunities in the cannabis industry. “How would you know you could get it expunged if someone doesn’t tell you you could get it expunged on July 12?” Brown asked. “There are people who don’t have computers, access to information or a way to file the paperwork. Some people think they don’t have the money to do it. There are a lot of reasons we need to get the message out.” She has been getting as much information out as she can through social media

and through her business and advocacy work in Tucson and has identified three additional places she hopes to utilize this summer. More information is available by emailing acre41@gmail.com. Acre 41 is working with NDICA, a Los Angeles-based 501(c)(3) nonprofit whose mission is “to create an ethical and equitable cannabis industry to reduce barriers contributing to the lack of representation of those most impacted by the War on Drugs, including people of color and other marginalized community

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members.” For Brown, the mission is to legitimize the cannabis business and treat marijuana like the medication it can be for people like her, whose life has been positively affected by the plant. It’s also about being a conduit for people whose lives have been negatively affected by draconian pot laws. “They can’t rely on the state or cities to help them,” she said. “I think there should be auto-expungement with the court system ... why not make it automatic?” ■

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JUNE 17, 2021

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

By Rob Brezsny. Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY HOROSCOPE 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700 $1.99 per minute. 18 and over. Touchtone phone required.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Aries playwright Tennessee Williams was honest about the trickery he engaged in as he composed his entertaining masterpieces. “I don’t want realism,” he exclaimed. “I want magic! Yes, yes, magic! I try to give that to people.” I fully support you, Aries, if you would like to make that your goal in the next three weeks. In my astrological opinion, you and the people in your life have more than a mild need for magic. Your ability to thrive depends on you all getting big doses of magic. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): On my wall is a poster that says, “Avoid the Tragic Magic Triad: taking things too personally, taking things too seriously and taking things too literally.” This advice doesn’t refer to important matters, like my health or my ongoing fight against our culture’s bigotry. I take those issues very personally, seriously, and literally. Rather the motto refers to trivial and transitory issues, like the new dent made in my car by a hit-and-run driver in the Whole Foods parking lot, or the bad review of my book on Amazon.com, or the $18 that a certain Etsy seller cheated me out of, or the joke about the size of my nose that some supposed friend made on Twitter. According to my reading of astrological omens, Taurus, you would benefit right now from meditating on things like these that you take too seriously, personally and literally. Here’s Don Miguel Ruiz: “There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally.” GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “I remember wishing I could be boiled like water and made pure again,” writes poet Jeffrey McDaniel. Judging from the current astrological omens, Gemini, I think you could be made reasonably pure again without having to endure an ordeal like being boiled like water. Do you have ideas about how to proceed? Here are mine: 1. Spend 15 minutes alone. With your eyes closed, sitting in a comfortable chair, forgive everyone who has

hurt you. Do the best you can. Perfection isn’t necessary. 2. Spend another 15 minutes alone, same deal. Forgive yourself of everything you’ve done that you think of as errors. Perfection isn’t required. 3. Spend another 15 minutes alone. Imagine what it would be like to unconditionally love yourself exactly as you are. 4. Spend another 15 minutes alone. Remember 10 amazing moments that you enjoyed between ages 5 and 13. CANCER (June 21-July 22): On June 23, 1940, Wilma Rudolph was born prematurely to a family that already had 19 other children. During her childhood, she suffered from pneumonia, scarlet fever, polio, and infant paralysis. The latter two diseases damaged her left leg, and she wore a brace until she was 12 years old. Nevertheless, by the time she was in high school, she had become a very good athlete. Eventually she competed in the Olympics, where she won four medals and earned the title “the fastest woman in history.” I propose that we name her your official role model for the rest of 2021. May she inspire you to overcome and transcend your own personal adversity. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Leo-born P. L. Travers wrote the children’s books about Mary Poppins, a nanny with magical powers. She was thoroughly familiar with folklore, ancient myths and the occult. The character of Mary Poppins, Travers said, was a version of the Mother Goddess. But in her writing process, she drew inspiration mainly from what she thought of as the vast dark nothingness. She wrote, “I’ve become convinced that the great treasure to possess is the unknown.” To generate her tales, she listened to silence and emptiness. I recommend you emulate her approach as you create the next chapter of your life story. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Virgo poet Melissa Broder writes, “Romantic obsession is my first

SAVAGE LOVE THE EURO ZONE

By Dan Savage, mail@savagelove.net

We’re a happily married couple from Europe, longtime readers, both in our thirties, and both interested in having sex sometimes with other people. Before the pandemic we were invited to a private sex party in a major European capital. It was an age- and face-controlled swingers night with background checks on every participant. It was our first experience and it was eye-opening, wonderful and very sexy, even though we were too shy to fool around with anyone else. But we promised ourselves

we would return and explore further. Then COVID-19 happened and we couldn’t travel. We decided to hook up with other people locally. We had amazing threesomes and foursomes, and it all went ridiculously well, up until the part when we got herpes from another couple. This other couple didn’t know they had it or didn’t bother to disclose. Herpes isn’t as common here as in the U.S., as far as my research went, and it was a huge bummer, but after educating and medicating ourselves, we decided to

language. I live in a world of fantasies, infatuations and love poems.” I wouldn’t normally authorize you to share her perspective, but I will now. The astrological omens suggest you have something important to learn from being more enamored and adoring than usual. If you say YES to the deluge of yearning, you’ll gain access to a type of power that will prove very useful to you in the coming months. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Libran author Oscar Wilde disproved the misconception that Libras are wishy-washy, overly eager to compromise, and inclined to overthink everything. His writing had wit and flair, and his life was vivid and daring. He wrote, “There are moments when one has to choose between living one’s own life, fully, entirely, completely—or dragging out some false, shallow, degrading existence that the world in its hypocrisy demands.” I suspect that one of those pivotal moments will soon be coming up for you. Be Wilde-like! SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Philosopher Simone Weil wrote, “Only the light that falls continually from the sky gives a tree the energy to push powerful roots into the earth. The tree is actually rooted in the sky.” As you bolster your foundations in the coming months, as you deepen your roots, I hope you keep Weil’s brilliant observation in mind. Like a tree, the nourishment that will help you grow the stamina and strength and structure you need will come as you turn to the brightest, warmest, highest sources of inspiration. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): To be in groovy alignment with cosmic rhythms, you won’t merely walk, and you certainly won’t trudge. Rather you will saunter and ramble and promenade. You will strut and rove and prowl. Likewise, you won’t just talk, and you certainly won’t mutter or grumble. Instead you will banter, rhapsodize, improvise, beguile and lyricize. Catch my drift? You won’t simply laugh, but will chortle, cackle and guffaw. In other words, Sagittarius, you are authorized to imbue everything you do with style, panache, and imagination.

continue having hookups with others. We tell everyone in advance because we believe it’s the right thing to do. Some cut us off, some don’t care, some admit they also have it, which always leaves us wondering if they would have admitted it without us “coming clean” first. We are still part of the online community that organized that wonderful party and, with things opening up here, they are beginning to plan the next event. We would love to go back. My question is: Can we? Should we? Should we tell everybody about the herpes? Or is that a risk you take at an orgy involving 50 or more people? We’ve read a lot about transmission and know that sometimes skin-to-skin contact is

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Congratulations on being such a duty-bound, no-nonsense adult. May you continue to ply your dogged persistence and beast-of-burden attitude as long as it gets important tasks done, helps you feel useful and doesn’t make you sick. But if you do get tempted to depart from the sacrificial path anytime soon, please know that you will not offend any gods or demons. Nor will you incur a karmic debt. In fact, I believe you have cosmic clearance to dabble with lightheartedness for a while. You should feel free to experiment with fun and games that appeal to your sense of wonder. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “I can barely conceive of a type of beauty in which there is no melancholy,” wrote poet Charles Baudelaire. What?! That makes no sense. I’m aware of millions of beautiful things that aren’t tinctured with melancholy. California’s Mount Shasta in the late spring twilight, for example. New York City’s Guggenheim Museum, a gorgeous gleaming building designed by genius architect Frank Lloyd Wright. The Marmore waterfalls in central Italy. The gardens of painter Claude Monet in Normandy, France. David Byrne’s gloriously hopeful website, ReasonsToBeCheerful. world. I mention this, Aquarius, because I expect life to bring you a flood of non-melancholic beauty in the coming days. Take advantage of this grace to replenish your trust in life. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Piscean author César Aira praises the value of escaping one’s memories. He writes, “Forgetting is like a great alchemy free of secrets, transforming everything to the present.” I’d love to see you enjoy alchemy like that in the coming weeks, dear Pisces. It’s a favorable time to lose at least some of the inhibitions and limitations you think you have to accept because of what happened in the past. As Aira says, forgetting “makes our lives into a visible and tangible thing we hold in our hands, with no folds left hidden in the past.” ■ Homework: My birthday’s coming up. I welcome your blessings! newsletter@freewillastrology.com or PO Box 4399, San Rafael, CA 94913.

enough. We also know that it’s possible to have herpes and not be aware of it, which means other participants may already have it and not know. So what’s the right thing to do? Should we just pass up this orgy for the rest of our lives? Take the viral suppressants that weekend and fuck as many people as we can without worrying about it? —Sincerely Wondering About Post-Pandemic Explicit Disclosures P.S. I found a piece of advice online about this issue from Betty Dodson, written in 2009, but I’d love to hear your thoughts. Hm. I would think an invite-only swingers party with “age- and face-controlled”

JUNE 17, 2021

background checks (meaning: no olds*, no uglies**) would also put a few questions to prospective attendees about sexual health. If the organizers of this party don’t require you to disclose that you have herpes or other sexually-transmitted infections—because they enforce safer-sex protocols that minimize the risk of transmission and/ or they quite rightly assume that anyone down to sex with 50 strangers in a single evening either already has herpes or at least willing to chance it—then I don’t think you have to disclose. Don’t confuse “don’t think you have to” with “don’t think you shouldn’t.” I think you should disclose—I think you should keep disclosing—and if disclosing gets you scratched off the guest list, SWAPPED, you will have other opportunities to fuck other people in other major European capitals. I mean, you’ve been disclosing to couples locally and haven’t exactly wanted for opportunities… even during a pandemic. (People who weren’t worried about catching COVID-19 during the pandemic—which isn’t over yet—probably weren’t too worried about catching herpes.) Yes, some couples ghosted after you disclosed but it sounds like just as many or more weren’t scared off. And the couples who ghosted? Some already have herpes and don’t know it—and HPV as well, SWAPPED, as both of these very common STIs are easily transmitted through skin-to-skin contact. Anyone who wants to avoid contracting them shouldn’t have multiple sex partners—or arguably any sex partners at all, considering how common these infections are and, again, how easily transmitted they are. And anyone who attends orgies—anyone who’s sexually active at all—should get regular STI screenings, get treated for treatable STIs, and refrain from having sex (or attending sex parties) when they’re symptomatic or still infectious. (And everyone can and should get the HPV vaccine and

people with herpes can take meds that make outbreaks less frequent and less intense and make them less likely to pass herpes on to others.) And while it’s my official position that you should disclose—because, like you, I think disclosing is the right thing to do— my unofficial position is that anyone who has sex with 50 strangers in a European capital, be it major or minor, has volunteered for herpes. P.S. The late, great Betty Dodson was never one for mincing words. Not only did Dodson tell a couple with herpes that they didn’t need to disclose unless asked in the column SWAPPED found, Dodson also shared that she didn’t tell her own partner she had herpes until she had an outbreak 10 years into the relationship. (“Orgy Guilt Because We Didn’t Share We Have Herpes,” Dodsonandross.com, July 7, 2009). “I abhor how our society has turned herpes into an STD,” Dodson wrote. “My first genital herpes outbreak was in the ’70s. If you didn’t have herpes back then, it meant you weren’t having sex. It was more like a badge of sexual abundance.” I’m a 24-year-old heterosexual French man. (Sorry for my English.) I really love my girlfriend. Our relationship is deep, we listen and understand to other, and we take care of the other. The sex is great, truly great. We try many different things and we try to fulfill our common desires and the desires of the other. Long story short: everything with her and our relationship is perfect. The only thing is that she wants our relationship to be monogamous and I would like to have sex with 75% of the girl I bump into. Normally this is not a big deal because, since I’m not particularly attractive, so there are not many girls that want to have sex with me. But during the four years we have been together I had some opportunities to which I had to say no. Once I kissed another girl and the day

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after I confessed this to my girlfriend. Now every time I find myself attracted to someone else I immediately tell my girlfriend. She doesn’t blame me for finding other women attractive or even when I confess to flirting with another woman but I know she doesn’t feel good about it. If I have to choose I will always choose her but I love to flirt. I would also love to see how is sex with someone else, as I have never had sex with anyone else. But at the same time I don’t want to hurt her and I feel childish for not being able to control my instincts. How do people get out of these sorts of situations? —Diligently Escaping Sexual Intercourses, Relentlessly Excited

Monogamists Anonymous. (“Hi, my name is ASSHOLE BOYFRIEND and I’ve been monogamous for four years and each day is a struggle.”) If you don’t wanna be in a monogamous relationship with this woman, DESIRE, if monogamy isn’t the price of admission you’re willing to pay, end this relationship. But if it is a price you’re willing to pay, DESIRE, then pay it and SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT IT. If you can’t shut the fuck up about it—if you can’t keep these thoughts to yourself and/or find someone else to confide in about them (a friend? a bartender? a pompier?)— your girlfriend is going to realize she’s paying way too steep a price and dump your ass.

First… your English is way better than my (non-existent) French. No need to be feel bad about that. Second… if you wanna be feel bad about something, DESIRE, feel bad about being a jerk to your girlfriend. In other words: OH MY GOD, DUDE, SHUT THE FUCK UP. Stop running to your girlfriend to “confess” every time you have an impure thought about another woman. Constantly and needlessly reminding your girlfriend you would like to fuck other women is just cruel. She knows that, DESIRE, so you don’t need to tell her. You’re not being honest, you’re not being transparent, you’re being an asshole. This is a relationship, DESIRE, not a meeting of Reluctant

* Age is just a number, of course, but people, alone or in groups, are allowed to seek sex partners in their own and/or their preferred age range—and I say that as someone who would most likely be excluded from this particular sex party based on my age. ** A person doesn’t have to be conventionally attractive to attract sex partners—and a person can be conventionally attractive in every sense and repel more people than they attract.

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COVID Precautions Taken Body Rub Ajo and Kinney area. You all stop by and enjoy a stress free body rub by a man for a man. Private/Discreet. Call or text Oliver: 520-358-7310

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COMMERCIAL/ INDUSTRIAL/RETAIL SPACE Artist Work Space for Rent 550 sq ft artist work space for rent. Call Steve 520-406-0875

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HEALTHY LIVING/ FITNESS Full Body Massage by a licensed professional of 27 years. Centrally located in Tucson. New client special, $60/ hour. Incalls only. Call 520-461-2881. Please, no texts.

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Mature Woman Full Body Massage Satisfaction Guaranteed. Provided by a woman for a man. 10 am to 8 pm Text or Call 520-278-0597  FULL BODY RUB Best full body rub for men by a man. West Tucson. Ajo and Kinney. Privacy assured. 7AM to 7PM. In/Out calls available. Darvin 520-404-0901. No texts. 

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