The Fuddler October 2016

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Est. 2002

Dawn Smith Dog Holidays Overnight stays and holiday care in our home - a great alternative to kennels.

Walks in the local countryside Est 1998 Collection available

Hello once again everyone and a huge welcome to another sparkling October edition of your Fuddler!

As always we very much hope you will enjoy the issue - there’s loads of local information inside, lots of stories, the usual fun and nonsense and of course

please look carefully at those important messages from our advertisers as you never know what you might find in The Fuddler!

If you are getting ready to book your Christmas party you’ll find some mouth watering menus in this edition too!

Mobile: 07789 585766

www.dogholidays.vpweb.co.uk alfred.smiths@btinternet.com Overnight Stays

C&R PEST MANAGEMENT x 40 Yrs experience x Fully Insured x Special Rates for OAPS! Wasps, Rats, Mice, Rabbits, Moles, etc Free Estimate 01525 450046 07500 431131

NEED AN ELECTRICIAN? NIC-EIC Registered All electrical work Testing and Certification Free Estimates AMPTHILL ELECTRICAL SERVICES

01525 632921 07977173452 Why did the accountant stare at a glass of orange juice for three hours?

It said on the box, concentrate!

Accounts, Payroll, Bookkeeping, Tax, Business Advice ... and much more.

Ring to book a free, noͲobligation meeting today!

114 High Street, Cranfield, Beds, MK43 0DG Tel: 01234 752566 Email: info@vowles.co.uk www.vowles.co.uk

Enjoy our Express Lunch

from £6.95 served 12.00 - 2.30pm We are now taking bookings for Christmas! www.bangkoklounge.com When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Sick PC or laptop?

Call the Doc for Hardware & software Diagnosis & treatment

01525-402227 john.stafford@compu-doc.co.uk

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ĞůĞďƌĂƚŝŶŐ ϰϬ LJĞĂƌƐ ŝŶ ďƵƐŝŶĞƐƐ ϭϵϳϲ Ͳ ϮϬϭϲ

tŝŶĚŽǁƐ

hWs Θ ůƵŵŝŶŝƵŵ

Zϵ tŝŶĚŽǁƐ

sĞƌƚŝĐĂů ^ůŝĚŝŶŐ tŝŶĚŽǁƐ ŽŽƌƐ ƌĂŶŐĞ ŽĨ ůƵŵŝŶŝƵŵ ĂŶĚ hWs ŽŽƌƐ͘

ŽŶƐĞƌǀĂƚŽƌŝĞƐ

džĐĞůůĞŶƚ ƚŚĞƌŵĂů ŝŶƐƵůĂƚŝŽŶ ƌĞĚƵĐŝŶŐ ĞŶĞƌŐLJ ĐŽƐƚƐ͘ tĂƌŵĞƌ ŝŶ ƚŚĞ ǁŝŶƚĞƌ ŵŽŶƚŚƐ͘ ƵĂů ĂĐƚŝŽŶ ƐĞůĨͲĐůĞĂŶ ŐůĂƐƐ͘

No ǁŝŶĚŽǁ Žƌ ŐůĂnjŝŶŐ ũŽď ƚŽŽ ƐŵĂůů WƵƚ LJŽƵƌ ƚƌƵƐƚ ŝŶ Ă ĐŽŵƉĂŶLJ ƚŚĂƚ ŚĂƐ ďĞĞŶ ƚƌĂĚŝŶŐ ĨŽƌ ŽǀĞƌ ϯϬ LJĞĂƌƐ͊ &Žƌ Ăůů LJŽƵƌ ǁŝŶĚŽǁ͕ ĚŽŽƌƐ ĂŶĚ ĐŽŶƐĞƌǀĂƚŽƌLJ ŶĞĞĚƐ ĐĂůů ƵƐ ŶŽǁ Žƌ ǀŝƐŝƚ ŽƵƌ ǁĞďƐŝƚĞ͘ Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

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DH Cox & Sons General Builders x x x x x

Over 30 years’ experience Local friendly services Can undertake all aspects of building and maintenance to an exceptional standard No job too small Free & competitive quotes

Call Dave 07976 766143 or 01525 841670 dhcoxbuilding@hotmail.co.uk Bedford RSPB local group meet at ARA club Manton Lane Bedford MK41 7PF. On Thursday 20th October 2016 at 7.30p.m.

Carol Barimore presents ‘The Nest Record Scheme’.

Outlining the work of the BTO to monitor breeding birds in the UK. Suitable for Experts and Novices, RSPB membership not essential. Entrance fee, group members £1 Guest £2 annual group membership £5 Reg. Charity No. 207076, more info www.rspb.org.uk/ groups/bedford On Wednesday 19th October there is to be a demonstration by pastels portrait artist Stan Hurr, 7-930 pm at St Nicholas Church Hall, Barton-le-Clay. Visitors welcome.

On Saturday 22nd October there is to be a Watercolour pencils workshop with artist John Harrison, 1000-1600 at Barton Village Hall, Barton-le-Clay. Focused on a landscape, the pencils, brush and paper needed for the workshop will be provided; bring your own board to support the paper and a water pot. Visitors welcome; to book please call Viv Callow on 01525 712735.

Steve Wildman’s High Quality Carpet, Upholstery, Rug and Leather Suite Cleaning Service Tel: BartonͲLeͲClay 01582 882620 On November 11th and 12th 2016 Ampthill Singers present their Annual Charity Concert - ‘Gotta Sing, Gotta Dance’ at Ampthill Methodist Church, Dunstable Street, Ampthill.

The event starts at 7.30pm and promises fun for all the family with lots of songs Old and New with a little bit of Vaudeville.

The show is suitable for all age groups and tickets are available from Country Properties Ampthill or Ampthill Town Council Offices AFTER 11th October.

Alternatively ring the box office on 07506 198682 and leave a message.

Ticket prices are Adults £10, Children under 12 £6, Concessions £8 and a Family ticket (2x2) is £25.00 The Charities we are supporting this year are Autism Bedford and Carers Bedfordshire.

The next meeting is on Tuesday 18th October, 2016 at 7.30pm at the Addison Centre in Kempston. The speaker will be Nancy Gregory on “Scholars, Spectres and Surprises.”

Nancy is always a favourite. Cost £2.50 for members and more if you are a guest.

If you decide to come you will have a warm welcome. For more information contact Betty Thomas on 01480 861 421

B W Deacon Home Alone?

Maybe I can help – I offer a dog walking or daycare service (depending on your needs) leaving you with peace of mind knowing that your pet is loved and looked after in your absence.

High Class Family Butcher

Orders now being taken for Christmas

I have extensive experience with dogs over 35 years and live in Lidlington but I am happy to travel.

Limited spaces available – please contact me for further information.

Lene Newman 01525 839754 | 07890 200661

Email: lenenewman@hotmail.com

Turkeys, Poultry, Traditional Roasting Joints and much more.

Tel: Ampthill 01525 402175 Or Westoning 01525 712108 www.bwdeacon.co.uk

When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

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LORD DEE’S PONDERINGS

Crikey! Following my Birthday, people have been very kind indeed and treated me to luncheons everywhere for, which I am truly grateful. However, there is always a drawback, I have put on a little too much weight - so much so that I may not be able to squeeze in to my Santa Suit when festivities begin!

ARE YOU WORKING FROM HOME?

Why not place an economical ad like this in The Fuddler and let everyone know what you do?

Just email all the details to martin@thefuddler.com

Across: 1 Thrash, 4 Alpaca, 7 Meanwhile, 9 Pear, 10 Once, 11 Tells, 13 Endear, 14 Entity, 15 Tattoo, 17 Hither, 19 Trial, 20 Dare, 22 Kepi, 23 Yachtsmen, 24 Mulled, 25 Renown

Down: 1 Topple, 2 Aver, 3 Hinder, 4 Awhile, 5 Polo, 6 Artery, 7 Mandatory, 8 Enlighten, 11 Tarot, 12 Snail, 15 Tedium, 16 Orchid, 17 Hawser, 18 Raisin, 21 Earl, 22 Keen

Ciao

A BRIANISM

I do not eat health foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.

Jonathan’s Interior Decorating Services Painting, Wallpapering, Tiling

“The Fuddler” is published by MDA Publications. The views expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publisher. No part of this publication may be copied in any form or by any means without written permission of the Publisher. Copyright MDA Publications.

Like to book an ad, or ask about our absurdly low rates please ring Martin on

Est 1999

Based in Lower Shelton Bedfordshire

Fully Insured and references available.

Please call 07968 659877 or 01234 767597 to arrange a quote.

Or if you prefer, drop us an email to martin@thefuddler.com

Winter is coming!

Beat the rush before it’s too late ...

1, Bedford Street, Ampthill, Beds Tel: 01525 841199 www.ampthillfireplaces.co.uk Mon - Fri: 10am - 5pm Sat: 10am - 4pm Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

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THE PRINCE OF WALES 24 Bedford Street Ampthill MK45 2NB Tel: 01525 840504 www.princeofwales-ampthill.com

CHRISTMAS BOOKINGS NOW BEING TAKEN We can cater for parties of up to 50 Festive Lunch Menu Sweet Potato, Red Lentil and Coconut Soup Garlic Mushroom Crostini Rocket Salad

Game Terrine

Festive Dinner Menu Sweet Potato, Red Lentil and Coconut Soup Garlic Mushroom Crostini Rocket Salad

Game Terrine

Spiced Plum Chutney and Warm Toast

Spiced Plum Chutney and Warm Toast

Salt and Pepper Squid

Salt and Pepper Squid

Piri Piri Mayo

Piri Piri Mayo

Teriyaki Chicken

Teriyaki Chicken

Oriental Salad ******

Traditional Roast Turkey Festive Trimmings

Pork Fillet Medallions Mushroom, Apple and Cider Sauce

Baked Lemon Glazed Salmon Parsnip and Leek Mash

Mushroom and Red Pepper Frittata Cherry Tomato Salsa

Braised Blade of Beef Slow Cooked in a Stilton and Peppercorn Cream Sauce ******

Christmas Pudding Brandy Sauce

Baileys and White Chocolate Cheese Cake Lemon Tart Chantilly Cream

Chocolate Brownie Vanilla Ice Cream

Strawberry Pana Cotta

Oriental Salad ******

Traditional Roast Turkey Festive Trimmings

Roast Rack of Lamb With a Minted Jus

Pork Fillet Medallions Mushroom, Apple and Cider Sauce

Baked Lemon Glazed Salmon Parsnip and Leek Mash

Mushroom and Red Pepper Frittata Cherry Tomato Salsa

Braised Blade of Beef Slow Cooked in a Stilton and Peppercorn Cream Sauce ******

Christmas Pudding Brandy Sauce

Baileys and White Chocolate Cheese Cake Lemon Tart Chantilly Cream

Chocolate Brownie Vanilla Ice Cream

Strawberry Coulis

Strawberry Pana Cotta

******

Strawberry Coulis

Coffee and Mince Pie ******

2 Course Menu £19.95 3 Course Menu £23.95

******

Coffee and Mince Pie ******

3 Course Menu £29.95

To Reserve Your Table Please Call The Prince of Wales on 01525 840504 Or Email – Ricksbar1@aol.com When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

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Guttering Problems?

Gutters Cleaned.

SELF EMPLOYED TAX AND ACCOUNTS

Leaking Gutters repaired.

SUFFERING WITH ACCOUNTS BLUES? STUPIFIED WITH TAX RETURNS? STRUGGLING WITH TAX REMINDERS?

All by a friendly local established company Call Rob on 01525 552066 or 07977 206403

Bradnam Guttering 3

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Here’s another of Marjorie’s fine crosswords for our entertainment Across: Down: 1 Deceptive appearance (6) 1 Gambol (6) 4 Blob (6) 2 Dry (4) 7 Criminal (9) 3 Further applause (6) 9 Heavy metal (4) 4 Saturate (6) 10 Kiln (4) 5 Lion (anag) (4) 11 Heather (5) 6 Grinding tool (6) 13 King of the waves? (6) 7 Momentousness (9) 14 Compassionate (6) 8 Large spider (9) 15 Inside (6) 11 Small ornamental case (5) 17 Type of sailing vessel (6) 12 Foretell (5) 19 Cut (5) 15 Wilt (6) 20 Hoo-ha (2,2) 16 Sibling’s son (6) 22 Verve (4) 17 Vault (6) 23 Mexican food dish (9) 18 Haphazard (6) 24 Carpenter’s tool (6) 21 Burden (4) 25 Tempo (6) 22 Whirlpool (4)

22

A

Y

L C

25

U

Sandra’s been busy again looking through her big book of words (dictionary?) and brings us the word below. (Nothing to do with the crossword.) Just look at the hexagon and see whether or not the word jumps out at you!

(Answer at the bottom of the page if it doesn’t!)

T

23

24

6

F

L

JH ELECTRICAL • DOMESTIC • INDUSTRIAL • COMMERCIAL

24 HR CALLOUT AVAILABLE All electrical work undertaken email: supaspark@tiscali.co.uk Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Tactfully

2

Call 07790 672699 Email derek_story@yahoo.co.uk For your free consultation

T

New Gutters Fitted.

1

dgs accountants

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THE WINGFIELD CLUB 37 Church Street, Ampthill MK45 2PL – 01525 403321

UPCOMING EVENTS

FAMILY HALLOWEEN DISCO

OUR KEV 15TH OCTOBER 2016 8- LATE

FANCY DRESS SATURDAY 29TH OCTOBER 2016 7:30 PM - LATE

CHRIS HOBBS DJ

THE NUMBERS ARE BACK

12TH NOVEMBER 2016 8- LATE

FRIDAY 2ND DECEMBER 2016 8PM - LATE

YOU ARE WELCOME TO COME AND TRY OUT THE CLUB THREE TIMES AND IF YOU LIKE IT THEN WHY NOT JOIN FOR ONLY £10 PER YEAR PLUS A ONE OFF £3.50 JOINING FEE

MEAT RAFFLE EVERY SUNDAY 13 PRIZES TO BE WON TWO FUNCTION ROOMS AND THE LOUNGE ARE AVAILABLE TO HIRE- DAY AND EVENING AT COMPETITIVE RATES, PERFECT FOR CHRISTENINGS, WEDDINGS, BIRTHDAY’S AND WAKES. OPENING TIMES: MONDAY-THURSDAY: 12-3PM & 7-11PM FRIDAY & SATURDAY: 12-11:30PM SUNDAY 12-11PM

TOP QUALITY – LOW PRICES BEERS, WINES AND SPIRITS

BT SPORTS AND SKY SPORTS AVAILABLE ON BIG SCREENS

REAL ALES AND BEERS FROM £2.70 LAGERS FROM £2.95 VODKA/WHISKY/GIN DOUBLES £2.20 FINE NE WINES - £2.80

DARTS AND POOL TABLE ARE ALSO AVAILABLE AND BINGO EVERY THURSDAY

When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

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Spick and Span cleaning

07ϳϯϴ ϭϴϯ ϰϰϱ

Reliable, thorough and personalised domestic cleaning.

Regular weekly/fortnightly or oneͲoff deep cleans. Ͳ Natural/ecoͲfriendly products used Ͳ Fully insured Ͳ References available Ͳ PetͲowners welcome

With The Duchess of Troll

Reflections in the Dewpond.

The Photo Album 'The Old House'

It seems that transport, in the way of bicycles, motorbikes, early cars and of course old farm machinery appears in many of the sepia pictures kept in the Old Biscuit Tin, being sorted out by The Five Friends, while finishing up the plate of doorstep bread and damson jam, served with proper Bedfordshire cup of tea, that is hot, strong with a dash of milk. The Old Boys reflecting that milk was delivered early morning by horse and cart ready for that first cuppa of the day. Mrs Sam recounted that if you ran round the corner to the farm with the pint sized milk churn you could watch as the freshest milk you will ever get flowed through the cooler to the large churn, and the farmer then

ladled out the sweet smelling milk into the waiting vessel. Memories of that afternoon milking, the smell of hot cows waiting their turn in the cowshed, and watching them scurrying back out to the fields. The only time that was stressful when calves were taken from the mother and the bellowing echoed around the village. Sam Ilex spent a lot of W.W.2 on a farm in Worcester with his Mother, he recalled how he loved following his adored Uncle Ron, learning at a young age to have no fear of any dog, horse, cow or any bull, however big they were, just watching learning country ways.

That's the best way to learn, because you don't realize you are, nodded the others in agreement. I loved that first milk from a newly calved cow, Sam Ilex's eyes light up as he told this!

The bicycles you all know about, my Great Uncle Joe had a shop selling them, so he was well thought of in Houghton Conquest, so when he

Who has your keys??

When was the last time you replaced your locks?

All lock work undertaken from installation to repairs and maintenance. All major cards accepted.

Call your local locksmith today!

TELEPHONE: 01525 721001 www.lockmastersmobile.co.uk office@lockmastersmobile.co.uk died, long after the effects of being 'mustard gassed' during WW1 his wife Great Aunt Annie took on the business. The Mrs Sam told the Five Old Boys of going round to get the accumulator changed for the ancient wireless. The aerial went miles around the garden to a shared tall pole. Mind you in thunderstorms wires were pulled out, and everyone disappeared under that cupboard beneath the stairs, except Great Aunt Lizzie and The Mrs Sam, one couldn't get under, the other wouldn't. Mice !

The love of music comes little by little, listening on that ancient wireless to concerts from faraway places, the Sunday Church Services, the classical music played on the church organ, waiting for the service to begin, even the church bells rang out tunes, at school the assembly's singing and music, and the cinema, the interval when the music could was heard, but unseen, then that magical moment when a smiling

organist would appear from the depths playing the Wurlitzer. The love of the spoken word, of storytelling, the anticipation of the next episode. Sam Ilex said you are right Mrs Sam, we all rushed in at 6.45 to hear Dick Barton. Such a shame when The Archers took over the time slot, nodding in agreement The Old Boys.

It's amazing what you remember just by these photos, as Charlie talked of when he first went to work, after giving his Mother money he each week put away a few bob to save for a bike. The day came, enough saved up so to the bicycle shop in town, (he lived in town), walking up and down to see if the right height, being short in stature , this was important, at last one black shiny bicycle paid for, now how to ride home. Very eventful journey. Mostly off than on.

He did master the bicycle, as he wanted to court a girl in Rushden, his future wife.

More next time. D.O.T.

Maulden Garage Ltd FOR ALL YOUR VEHICLE NEEDS Modern Classic or Vintage Repairs, Servicing, Breakdowns, Fabrication, Tyres, Exhausts Classic Rally Car Preparation and on event service support Unit 10 Woodside Clophill Road Maulden Beds MK45 2AE www.mauldengarage.co.uk mauldengarage@btconnect.com

01525 862877 Free local delivery and collection service

Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Page 9

CHRISTMAS MENU

2 COURSES - £16.95 3 COURSES - £19.95 STARTERS… Prawns & smoked salmon with Marie rose sauce on a bed of mixed leaves Tomato & roasted red pepper soup with garlic croutons & fresh bread Mushrooms sautéed in a garlic butter on a toasted muffin topped with horseradish cream cheese & rocket Pork & chicken pate topped with cranberry jelly served with melba toast & onion chutney Mini duck spring rolls served with hoisin sauce MAIN COURSES… Roast turkey, sage & onion stuffing, pigs in blanket served with roast potatoes & gravy Oven roasted salmon with a cranberry & orange butter served with dauphinoise potatoes Breast of chicken wrapped in parma ham with a port & redcurrent jus – served with dauphinoise potatoes Baked Somerset brie in an open crisp onion, chive & thyme pastry case topped with beetroot & apple chutney - served with roast potatoes Medallions of sirloin steak with a red wine sauce & dauphinoise potatoes All served with seasonal vegetables PUDDINGS… Traditional Christmas pudding served with a brandy custard Irish cream cheesecake with clotted cream Chocolate torte with fresh raspberries & clotted cream Homemade cherry pie served warm with vanilla ice cream White chocolate & honeycomb ice cream Cheese & Biscuits Additional Teas & Coffees also available

CHRISTMAS PARTY NIGHTS

DINNER & DISCO £25 Per person Friday 9th December & Saturday 10th December The Cross Keys PROSECCO ON ARRIVAL & 3 COURSE MEAL 13 High Street, Pulloxhill, MK45 5HB 01525 712442 hello@thecrosskeys.co.uk

When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Page 10

FARMERS MARKETS The Farmers Market in Woburn is held on the third Sunday of every month from 10.00 - 2.00 at The Pitchings, whilst Ampthill Farmers Market is held on the last Sunday of each month from 11.00 - 2.00 at the rear of Natwest Bank in Ampthill.

ARE YOU OFFERING CHRISTMAS PARTY MENUS? Now is the perfect time to book your ad in the next Fuddler and let everybody know details!

To book your ad please email details to martin@thefuddler.com

Don’t forget The Charter Market in Ampthill every Thursday and Flitwick Market on Fridays!

With Jimmy The Voice

Here’s a worrying one that JTV has sent to us. If you look at the picture below you will see the various gradients in the colour….

...However, as always with JTV all is not as it seems!

The horizontal bar is the same colour right through!

By Julio Van Peebles Julio’s worries and useless facts: 1) Has anyone ever been called Clare Voyant?

2) Did you know that the toothbrush was invented in 1498?

3) Why do finger tips shrivel up in the bath?

4) Did you know that the Apple iwatch can malfunction if you have a tattoo on your wrist?

5) Has anyone ever been knocked for any other number other than 6?

6) Did you know that Louis XIV of France liked mayonnaise?

A Very Happy 18th on the 18th October Caitlin.

Love Mum, Dad, Kieran and Niall.

Happy Birthday Sweet Pea for the 19th October - hope to see you soon!

'Bert & Mary Harris' Many congratulations on your 70th Wedding Anniversary on 19th October 2016 15th October A very Happy Birthday to Julio 31st October Happy Birthday to Chloe

love from all xx

STEPHEN A very Happy Birthday for the 9th October!

THE JOLLY COOPERS

Traditional Country Village Pub and Restaurant Well we had some glorious hot weather during September and the garden looked wonderful, but the temperatures have dropped and the nights are definitely drawing in Ͳ Autumn is upon us.

Ian will have to get the winter planting done and the chimneys must be swept for it is nearly THAT time of year.

The wood pile is stacked, the Festive menu is ready (we are taking bookings already) and we must turn our thoughts to colder times. We have 3 real ales, some warm rich reds and chilled whites, all ready to match up with some real comfort food, especially our traditional Sunday roast.

A choice of 3 meats with roast potatoes & parsnips homemade Yorkshire puddings and a full selection of seasonal vegetables all for £8.95 or for those with a larger appetite Go Large for £10.95!

So come along take the weight of your feet, have a drink and maybe something to eat. Enjoy the atmosphere and the welcome surroundings.

Bobbi and Ian look forward to seeing you soon

You can always check what is going on at jollycoopersflitton.co.uk

THE JOLLY COOPERS, WARDHEDGES, FLITTON, BEDS TEL: 01525 860626 Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Page 11

AMPTHILL ACCOUNTANCY TUTORS ONE TO ONE TUITION COVERING ALL AAT UNITS and F1, F2, F3, F7 ACCA

SHOPPING IN

MILTON KEYNES There is nothing like retail therapy to improve our spirits as the darker evenings set in. With a fantastic regional shopping centre at Milton Keynes, there’s a superb range of fashion, homeware, gifts and restaurants just down the road.

PGCE Qualified Tutor

Did you know that bus service 197 takes you straight there from Maulden, Ampthill and Flitwick, timed for shopping, and running every Tuesday and Saturday.

Call 07790 672699

A family of 4 (inc 2 children) can travel for just £8 return!

Email derek_story@yahoo.co.uk

I find I always have to write something on a steamed mirror.

How is it that one match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box of matches to start a campfire?

Never lie to a dog.

My friend’s husband is so silly he has an IQ of 53. She calls him gifted.

Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.

Procrastination is the thief of time.

My friend has realised that although her husband thinks he is the head of the household - she is the neck.

The best way to pay for a lovely moment is to enjoy it.

Uninhibited dancing distracts even the most committed worrier.

If you are bored you could always make a scale model of Notre Dame Cathedral using mashed potato.

In 1999 142 British people were injured by not removing all the pins from new shirts.

He who laughs last thinks the slowest.

AA WINDOW REPAIRS DOUBLE GLAZING REPAIR SPECIALIST x MISTY DOUBLE

GLAZING REPLACED x DRAUGHTY WINDOWS

REPAIRED x WINDOW&DOOR

HANDLES REPLACED

1. An unkindness is the collective term for which creature?

2. Where would you find a solid suit?

3. What is an ‘Alewife’?

4. Hubert is the Patron Saint of whom?

5. W h a t i s a ‘ B a r b a d o s Blackbelly’?

6. Who created Superintendent Hannasyde?

7. There is a town called ‘Nowhere’. Where is it?

8. Where did pasta originate?

9. What was Tchaikovsky’s first job?

10.Where would you find a ‘Parasitic Cone’?

x WINDOW & DOOR

ADJUSTMENTS x LEAKING GUTTERS

REPAIRED x AND MUCH MORE

ON OUR WEBSITE

CALL FOR A FREE QUOTATION OR ADVICE

TELEPHONE: 01525 718432

www.aatripleglazing.co.uk

1 Raven, 2 Bridge game, 3 A fish, 4 Huntsmen, 5 Breed of sheep, 6 Georgette Heyer, 7 Colorado U.S., 8 China, 9 Office clerk, 10 Volcano.

Babs decided that she needed a challenge, so she enrolled for a parachute jumping training course.

On her first day she listened intently to the instructor.

He told the class that they should start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.

Babs asked ‘How am I supposed to know when I’m at 300 feet?’

‘Good question’ said the instructor. ‘When you get to 300 feet, you can recognise the faces of people on the ground.’

‘What happens if there’s no one there I know?’ Babs asked sensibly.

01525 719719 www.grantpalmer.com

ODD JOBS Home Improvements

Do you have a wish list of outstanding jobs around the home or garden?

Perhaps you think these are too small for specialist trades or you don’t have the time or proper tools We are a friendly local service based in Ampthill specialising in all your small building and DIY requirements around the home and garden.

Further details can be found on my website of the range of who we are, the services we can offer and local work previously done.

Please call Ian to discuss your requirements on 07415 281969 Ͳ Turn DIY into Get It Done www.SandIpropertyservices.co.uk

When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Page 12

THE WHITE HORSE Husborne Crawley

Once again we thank you of your wonderful photos of The Fuddler on itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s travels around the world! On the left this month we have Mike in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, with 'The Fuddler' and enjoying some Cocktails and below we have an amusing picture of a gentleman with his Fuddler in Las Vegas!

OPEN S DAY CHRISTMl A5.00pm 12.00 unti

W! BOOK NO

If you have any pictures of a Fuddler being read away from home please send them in to martin@thefuddler.com Christmas Fayre Menu Available 1st â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 23rd December, Monday â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Friday from 12 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 9pm

Starters Homemade Soup of the Day with Bread (GF) King Prawn & Crayfish Cocktail, Granary Bread (GF) Chicken Liver PâtÊ, Mini Pickles, Red Onion & Beetroot Jam, Toast (GF) Deep Fried Breaded Brie, Cranberry & Orange Compote

Main Courses

Roast Turkey, Roasted Potatoes, Chestnut & Sage Stuffing, Pigs in Blankets, Turkey Gravy (GF) Woburn Venison Stew, Herb Dumplings, Mash, Seasonal Vegetables, Parsnip Crisps (GF) Grilled Fillet of Bream, Caper, Dill & Shrimp Butter, Herb Potatoes (GF) Roasted Squash & Red Pepper, Grilled Goats Cheese, Pine Nut & Sage Crumb, Sweet Balsamic Onions (GF) (All Main Courses are served with a selection of Seasonal Vegetables) All our Meat is supplied by Woburn Country Foods

Homemade Desserts Christmas pudding, Brandy Sauce Warm Dark Chocolate Brownie, Chocolate Sauce, Vanilla Pod Ice Cream (GF) Lemon Meringue Fool, Gingerbread Biscuits (GF) Vanilla Crème BrulĤe, Homemade Shortbread (GF) Cheese & Biscuit Plate (£1.50 supplement) (GF)

(GF)Ͳ Dishes with this symbol are either Gluten Free or a Gluten Free version can be prepared upon request

Before placing your order, please inform your server if a person in your party has a food allergy or any special dietary requirements. Please ask to view our Allergen information sheet.

1 Course ÂŁ13.95 2 Courses ÂŁ18.95 3 Courses ÂŁ24.95 All of the above include Tea/Filter Coffee

Â&#x2021;Â&#x17D;ÇŁ Ͳͳ͡ʹ͡ ͺ͸ʹ͜ͳ͸ Â&#x2122;Â&#x2122;Â&#x2122;ǤÂ&#x2013;Â&#x160;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201E;Â&#x17D;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013;ǤÂ?Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2026;Â&#x2018;Â?Â&#x2039;Â?Â&#x2030; Â&#x2022;Â&#x2018;Â&#x2018;Â?Ǩ

A preͲorder & £5 P/P deposit (nonͲrefundable) will be required for parties of 8+ guests

Serving food 7 days a week (Until 9.00pm Monday to Saturday and 12.00 to 6.00pm Sunday)

To Book call 01525 280565

The White Horse, 1 Mill Road, Husborne Crawley, Bedford, Mk43 0XE www.whitehorsehusbornecrawley.squarespace.com whitehorsehc@gmail.com.

Â&#x2039;Â?Â&#x2020; Â&#x2014;Â&#x2022; Â&#x2018;Â? Â&#x192;Â&#x2026;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201E;Â&#x2018;Â&#x2018;Â? ̡Â&#x2013;Â&#x160;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201E;Â&#x17D;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201D;Â&#x203A; Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D; Â&#x2021;Â?Â&#x192;Â&#x2039;Â&#x17D; Â&#x2014;Â&#x2022; Â&#x192;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2021;Â?Â&#x201C;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2039;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2039;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2022;̡Â&#x2013;Â&#x160;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201E;Â&#x17D;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013;ǤÂ?Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013; Â&#x160;Â&#x2021; Â&#x17D;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2039;Â&#x2022; Â&#x192; Â&#x201E;Â&#x201D;Â&#x192;Â?Â&#x2020; Â?Â&#x2021;Â&#x2122;ÇĄ Â&#x17D;Â&#x2014;Â&#x161;Â&#x2014;Â&#x201D;Â&#x203A; Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201D;Â&#x203A; Â&#x2022;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2039;Â? Â&#x2013;Â&#x160;Â&#x2021; Â&#x201C;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2039;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013; Â&#x192;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2021;Â&#x192; Â&#x2018;Â&#x2C6; Â&#x192;Â&#x2026;Â&#x201C;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2022; Â&#x192;Â?Â&#x2021; Â&#x2039;Â? Â&#x17D;Â&#x2018;Â&#x2019;Â&#x160;Â&#x2039;Â&#x17D;Â&#x17D;Ǥ Â&#x2039;Â&#x2013;Â&#x160; Â&#x152;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2022;Â&#x2013; ͳ͜ Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2026;Â&#x160;Â&#x192;Â&#x17D;Â&#x2021;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2022;ÇĄ Â&#x2122;Â&#x2021; Â&#x160;Â&#x192;Â&#x2DC;Â&#x2021; Â&#x2013;Â&#x2039;Â?Â&#x2021; Â&#x2013;Â&#x2018; Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2014;Â&#x2022;Â&#x2022;ÇĄ Â&#x2019;Â&#x192;Â?Â&#x2019;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201D; Â&#x192;Â?Â&#x2020; Â&#x2019;Â&#x17D;Â&#x192;Â&#x203A; Â&#x2122;Â&#x2039;Â&#x2013;Â&#x160; Â&#x203A;Â&#x2018;Â&#x2014;Â&#x201D; Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2013;Â&#x2018; Â&#x2039;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2022; Â&#x160;Â&#x2021;Â&#x192;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2013;ÇŻÂ&#x2022; Â&#x2026;Â&#x2018;Â?Â&#x2013;Â&#x2021;Â?Â&#x2013; Â&#x2122;Â&#x160;Â&#x2039;Â&#x17D;Â&#x2022;Â&#x2013; Â&#x2039;Â? Â&#x2018;Â&#x2014;Â&#x201D; Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2021;Ǥ Â&#x17D;Â&#x2021;Â&#x192;Â&#x2022;Â&#x2021; Â&#x2026;Â&#x192;Â&#x17D;Â&#x17D; Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D; Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2014;Â&#x201D;Â&#x2013;Â&#x160;Â&#x2021;Â&#x201D; Â&#x2039;Â?Â&#x2C6;Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D;Â?Â&#x192;Â&#x2013;Â&#x2039;Â&#x2018;Â?Ǥ

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Page 13

Once upon a time in the midst of the night, A man on his bike gave the folks of Ampthill a fright.

Dressed up in his gear he brought surprise and some fear, Because we all know the night of Halloween was here.

He would roar round the town with his scary old frown, He was so ugly the folks would have to look down.

So a great man from McColl’s he came to their aid He wanted to tell them about a plan he had made.

Come listen, come listen, come listen to me I have an idea which will make this man flee.

He handed out masks, fake blood and finger nails too, I think there’s enough, I think this will do.

So off the folks went to hide around the town, They were all getting ready to take the scary man down.

As he approached, the folks hid in the shadows of the night And when he came close they all jumped out and gave him such a fright.

So the man left and has not been seen anymore, So the Ampthill folk all met back at their local McColl’s convenience store.

The moral of the story is your local McColl’s is still there, We have many great Halloween products that we all know can cause a great scare.

So if you’re expecting some trick or treating, We have a great range of Halloween sweets the children would love to be eating.

So please pop in and have a good look around We will try not to scare you with all the great products that can be found.

MCCOLL’S - YOUR LOCAL CONVENIENCE STORE 17 CHURCH STREET AMPTHILL TELEPHONE: 01525 404096 OPEN: MON-SAT 6AM TO 8PM SUNDAY 7AM TO 8PM

AMPTHILL ROUNDTABLE FIREWORK DISPLAY SATURDAY 5TH NOVEMBER

@ THE CROSS KEYS SHOWGROUND

PULLOXHILL

GATES OPEN @ 5.30pm BONFIRE @ 6pm FIREWORKS @ 7pm

BBQ – BONFIRE – STALLS TICKETS IN ADVANCE – (Available from The Cross Keys from Monday 3rd October)

£4 ADULT - £2 CHILD – FAMILY (2 A 2 C) £12.00 ON THE GATE -

£5 ADULT - £ 3 CHILD – FAMILY (2 A 2C) £15.00

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Page 14

HOLIDAY LET IN THE LAKE DISTRICT OF COUNTY MAYO IRELAND Ͳ LAKE VIEW LODGE, PONTOON

This 3 Bedroom Bungalow is set in extensive gardens, complete with its own stream and enjoys stunning lake and mountain views.

This famed Angling destination a t t r a c t s fisherman from many corners of the globe. Foxford Town Centre is home of the Tiernan Brothers who have been serving Anglers for four Generations. www.themoy.com

Pontoon nestles between Lough Cullen and Lough Conn. There are a number of sheltered Beaches one of which is the most famous Drummin Wood, which is a mere 3 minutes drive from the property.

Visit Enniscrone which is a 25 minute drive. Snuggled into Sligo’s Coast Line, forming part of the Wild Atlantic Way and boasting a Blue Flag Beach. www.discoverenniscrone.com

The area is ideal for walking holidays and there are a number of Forest and lakeshore walks close by.

For Golf lovers a Trip to Mayo would not be complete without playing at the renowned Carne Golf Links in Belmullett. Include County Sligo, Enniscrone and Connemara on your Itinerary and you will have played all four of the most naturally beautiful Links Courses in the World. www.carnegolflinks.com

Take one of many Cruises on either Lough Corrib with its 365 Islands and take in the stunning views of Ashford Castle. Or take in the views on Clew Bay in the beautiful Town of Westport to include the mighty Croagh Patrick.

Visit Cong, the Home of the Quite Man Film staring John Wayne. www.virtualtourist.com/travel/Europe/Ireland/County_Mayo/ CongͲ296388/Things_To_DoͲCongͲTGͲCͲ1.html

The more adventurous would love the Kayaking and Stand up P a d d l e B o a r d i n g i n C l e w B a y W e s t p o r t www.theadventureislands.com/WaterͲPoweredͲActivities/seaͲ kayaking.html

Lastly a trip to Mayo would not be complete without a visit to the Wonderful Galway. This Vibrant City has so much to offer, from Theatres and Night Clubs. To a plentiful selection of Traditional Irish Music Bars and Restaurants .

Once you have been to Mayo you will be longing to come back to this truly magical place.

A special antiques and collectables valuation event will be taking place soon in your area. The experts of Lockdales Auctioneers will be providing free valuations on Friday 14th October, 10am to 2pm at The Parkside Hall, Woburn Street, Ampthill, Bedfordshire, MK45 2HX (plenty of free car parking on-site).

Valuations will be available for the following types of collectables: Coins (including British & World, sovereigns, Krugerrands, Royal Mint commemoratives & proof sets), stamps, banknotes, medals & militaria, antiques, clocks, watches, jewellery, gold, silver, pre-1900 documents/books & maps, cigarette-cards, postcards, pre-1960 sporting programmes & tickets, scientific instruments, swords, bayonets & antique firearms. No appointment necessary.

Members of the public will have the option, if they wish, to consign their goods to auction (subject to terms & conditions). Cash purchase offers are also available.

Valuations will be provided free of charge, with no obligation. High quality illustrated catalogues from previous auctions will be given away on a complimentary basis in order for the public to get a better idea of the services available.

We will also be holding prior events in Olney 10th October, and Hertford 13th October. If you have any questions feel free to contact Lockdales’ Martlesham offices: 01473 627110, sales@lockdales.com • See Lockdales advertisement on page 13

We need more men!

A local befriending charity is looking for more men to help make a real difference in the local community! x Do you have couple of hours to spare each week? x Do you enjoy spending time chatting and listening? x Do you have a sense of humor? x Do you enjoy the occasional trip to the pub? x If yes then this is an opportunity for you! x Full training and support given and no prior experience of a life limiting illness required x But you do need warmth, reliability, empathy, common sense and a ready smile.

Interested in joining our lively team?

Then contact Nicola Mills 01234 743063 or email: respiteathomevolunteers@aol.co.uk Respite at Home Volunteers offers a FREE befriending service to people with life limiting illnesses and support to their carers at home.

Registered charity: 1161178

Sleeps 6 Prices from £450.00 per week. Direct Flights from Luton Airport to Knock Airport. Low Cost Flights and cheap car hire make this an excellent value Holiday.

Lake View Lodge is 30 mins from the Airport.

Contact Chris or Val for details on either 07455198427 or chris.hackett723@ntlworld.com

The Stewartby Club, Stewartby Way, Stewartby are holding their first beer festival from Friday the 14th October to Sunday 16th October. There is free entry to all and the event features music, beers, raffles and a disco. On the Friday the club opens at 5.30pm with hot food available from 6 - 9pm.

On Saturday the Club opens from 11.00am - 1.00am and hot food is available from 2 - 8pm. On Sunday the Club opens at 12.00 noon and features a grand raffle draw during the afternoon. You’ll find a host of beers to try and a great variety of musical entertainment!

For more details you can ring the Club on 01234 768261 or look at their website www.stewartbyclub.com

Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Page 15

When you advertise in The Fuddler - youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Page 16

T Butlin Building and Plastering Est 1987

www.timbutlinbuilders.co.uk

26 years in business For your extensions, renovations, alterations, Upvc fascias / soffitts, guttering, block paving and all plastering including artex ceilings and walls plastered back to flat.

Tel: 01525 405670 / Mob: 07778 680393

Also offering: Impressions Female decorators All aspects of painting and decorating.

With female finesse to make the most of your home Tel 01234 751282 or 01525 405670 / Mob: 07944 710179

Settling down with my Shredded Wheat one morning I decided to tune into the BBC’s flagship morning programme Breakfast. During the thirty minutes that I watched one detail struck me. The two main presenters, seated on a sofa, were both women. The business and sports reporters were also of the female persuasion as was the weather forecaster. When the programme switched to a new studio venue, for the news locally, the main presenter, female as was the weather ‘girl’ and when an outside article was aired it was fronted by yet another who possessed two X chromosomes.

Back to the main studio and three outside reports plus the weather were all fronted by members of the fairer sex. For an organisation that constantly bangs on about gender equality this seemed somewhat hypocritical. Imagine the furore and claims of misogyny issuing forth from Millie Tant and her frenzied feminist horde had the show been entirely male staffed!

P.S. The antiquated ex-landlord has just returned from a staycation in the South West. Transport, courtesy of a bus pass, was mainly by auto bus but unfortunately these were painful due to a recurrence of his old problem. Fortunately the rubber ring packed for the beach proved invaluable in easing his discomfort.

"Open Day Sunday 6th November - Free Healing at the Enterprise House, Wrest Park Silsoe, Beds from 11 am to 4 pm Free admission, healing, therapy and chiropody advice to celebrate our 19th Anniversary"

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Page 17

The Crown Station Rd, Flitwick / MK45 1LA /01525 713737

A Proper Pub for Proper People FOOD SERVED Opening Times

MONDAY-THURSDAY 11.30 - 3 / 5:30 - 11 FRIDAY & SATURDAY

11.30 – MIDNIGHT

EVERYDAY12 - 2:30 /6-8 OPEN SUNDAY 12 - 10:30 SUNDAY ROAST FROM 12 TILL 4

Upcoming Events and Live Music!

Sat 8th Oct – Charity Race Night

*BOOKING ADVISABLE

8:30pm start with free buffet, dress to impress and proceeds to Prostate cancer research.

Sat 22nd Oct – Live music with The Journeymen 9pm.

Sat 29th Oct – Halloween Party! Live music with the Sons of the Late Colonel and a Fancy dress competition.

Sat 5th Nov – Fireworks Night! Free Entry. Display at 6:30pm (approximately) and live music from 9pm.

Now Taking Bookings for Christmas Lunch/Dinner. Served between the 23rd Nov till 23rd Dec. The Kitchen will then close for a holiday break and re-open on Mon 1st Jan.

When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Page 18

FREE PRESCRIPTION DELIVERY Can’t get to the chemist or surgery?

Don’t worry, we’ll pick up your prescription from your surgery and deliver your medication to your door.

Covering Ampthill, Clophill, Flitwick, Houghton Conquest, Maulden, Silsoe, Wilstead & surrounding villages.

36 Dunstable Street, Ampthill Telephone 01525 634857 2500+ Ales from April 2010 THE PERMANENT BEER FEST SOUTH BEDS CAMRA PUB OF THE YEAR 2014

“Ooh Matron!”

Russell’s famous Themed Charity Quiz Tues 25th Oct 2016 8 for 8.30pm start. £2 per person No more than 6 per team.

Cash prizes Best named team prize In Aid of Keech Hospice Care & St John’s Hospice

Themed Beer Fest in November You can’t B&T it!

CAMRA BEDS PUB OF THE YEAR 2013 OUR OTHER PUBS ARE: The Globe, Winfield Street, Dunstable (Bedfordshire Pub of the year 2010) - Tel: 01582 512300 The Wellington Arms, Wellington Street, Bedford (North Beds Pub of the year 2010) - Tel: 01234 308033 The Elm Tree, Orchard Street, Cambridge - Tel: 01223 502632 The Brewery Tap, North Bridge Street, Shefford - Tel: 01462 628448 Seven Stars, Albert Square, Rugby, CV21 2SH - Tel: 01788 561402

www.banksandtaylor.com

CHEESEMANS PHARMACY OF AMPTHILL Tel: 01525 402173 Moisturisers for dry skin conditions What it is and how can I treat it?

Moisturisers (your doctor or pharmacist may refer to them as emollients) are lotions, creams, ointments and bath/shower additives which ‘oil’ the skin to keep it supple and moist.

They can help prevent the skin form becoming dry and itchy and flaring up into patches of eczema. They are different to steroid creams and ointments which reduce inflammation and clear flare-ups of eczema.

Moisturisers can be purchased fairly cheaply from your pharmacy, supermarket or store. And they are often cheaper to buy than to have on prescription so avoid asking your GP for them.

There are several types and brands of moisturisers - cream, lotions and ointments. As a general rule the greasier and thicker the moisturiser is, the better and longer it works, but the messier it is to use! Moisturisers that are added to the bath should generally be avoided since they are likely to make your bath greasy and slippery, increasing the chances of falling. There is no evidence that they are more effective than moisturisers applied to damp skin after getting out of the bath.

The most effective one for you will depend on the dryness of your skin, the area of skin involved, and your preference. Do try to buy small quantities of different types to find one that suits you.

Some general advice on finding the right one for you is: x Use

a lotion or cream for mild skin dryness and occasional flare-ups of eczema x Use a thicker cream or ointment for moderate-to-severe dryness x A lotion is often best for areas of hairy skin x Use a cream or lotion for area of weeping eczema Most people with eczema will be prescribed a steroid cream or ointment to use when eczema flares up. These are very different to moisturisers, and should be used and applied in s different way. If you use the two treatments - apply the moisturiser, wait 10-15 minutes and then apply the steroid cream or ointment.

For more information on moisturisers for dry skin visit www.nhs.uk

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Page 19

ŝĚĞĂů ĞLJĞǁĞĂƌ

dŽƚĂů ĞLJĞ ĐĂƌĞ ĨŽƌ ƚŚĞ ǁŚŽůĞ ĨĂŵŝůLJ ŝŶ ƚŚĞ ŚĞĂƌƚ ŽĨ ƚŚĞ ůŽĐĂů ĐŽŵŵƵŶŝƚLJ͘

hŶŝƚ ϯ ,ŝŐŚĨŝĞůĚ ,ŽƵƐĞ ϭϭϬ dŚĞ ,ĂǁƚŚŽƌŶƐ &ůŝƚǁŝĐŬ D<ϰϱ ϭ&E ϬϭϱϮϱ ϳϭϱϳϱϵ /ĚĞĂůĞLJĞǁĞĂƌ͘ĨůŝƚǁŝĐŬΛŐŵĂŝů͘ĐŽŵ ǁǁǁ͘ŝĚĞĂůĞLJĞǁĞĂƌĨůŝƚǁŝĐŬ͘ĐŽ͘ƵŬ

^ŝŐŚƚ dĞƐƚƐ ŽŶƚĂĐƚ ůĞŶƐĞƐ ^ƵŶŐůĂƐƐĞƐ

'ŽŽĚ ůŽŽŬŝŶŐ ĞLJĞǁĞĂƌ ĨĨŽƌĚĂďůĞ E,^ tĞůĐŽŵĞ

Ăůů Ϭ ϬϭϱϮϱ ϳϭϱϳϱϵ ƚŽ Ŭ LJŽƵƌ ĂƉƉŽŝŶƚŵĞŶƚ ƚŽĚĂLJ͘

KƚŚĞƌ ŽƉƚŝĐŝĂŶ͛Ɛ ƉƌĞƐĐƌŝƉƚŝŽŶƐ ĂůǁĂLJƐ ǁĞůĐŽŵĞ͘

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Page 20

OSSORY ARMS 9 Arthur Street, Ampthill 07791 908699 www.ossoryarms.co.uk Thursday 20th October Rock and Roll Bingo Quiz Night 8pm In aid of lady bird pre-school

Garage Door Solutions Ltd Your local garage door expert for:

Replacements, Repairs and Spares x All makes & designs available x 24 Hour repair service x No call out charge x All work guaranteed x Free quotations Call us now on: 01525 721615 / 07761 093468 Website: www.garagedoorsolutionsltd.co.uk Or see the yellow pages

3, Woodcock Walk, Flitwick, Bedfordshire, MK 45 1RD

Big Ozz £6.95 - 2 Sausage, 2 Bacon, Tomato, Beans, 2 Eggs, 2 hash browns, Chips and Toast Little Ozz £5.00 - 1 Sausage, 1 Bacon, Tomato, Beans, egg, Chips and Toast.

Unlimited Tea or Coffee

Sunday Roasts £8.95 Served 12pm - 3pm Freshly cooked Meat of the Day. Served with Roast Parsnips, Home Grown Seasonal Vegetables, Yorkshires and Gravy.

All Sports Fixtures now shown live on Sky Sports and BT Sports

The weather that evening was relentless; the gentle rain which had persisted all day turned in full vengeance and lashed against the windows of the inn. The atmosphere inside was no less warming as members of the Hawkhurst gang were drinking and playing cards that night. Nobody ever crossed these smugglers, the law seemed powerless to stop them and witnesses refused to testify against them for fear of their own safety. Most sobering those evenings were the usual loaded pistols lying on the card tables. During the evening a stage coach, obviously lost in the storm, pulled up and fete was about to deal another ace of spades. Out stepped two well dressed gentleman and a young lady who was wearing some exquisite jewellery. Usually more interested in liquor than glitter it was quite a turn of events when by the end of the evening the lady had been relieved of all her jewels. Her pitying cries to be able to keep the delicate diamond encrusted locket around her neck, as gift from her late father, went completely unheeded. She was inconsolable. Leaving the inn to face the severity of the night another lady turned to the sobbing young lady and with a comforting smile handed her a beautiful lace handkerchief. “Do not fear my child” she whispered “dry your tears, for not all is lost” she smiled and was gone. It seemed strange that no members of the gang challenged either the words or the gesture, but then could they see or hear? Even the two gentlemen companions did not respond. The lady twisted the handkerchief gentle round her fingers in torment and occasionally dabbed her eyes with it. Shortly after, having warmed themselves with refreshments and been given directions of how to correct their route, the party left to continue their journey, with heavy heart. Settling into her seat in the coach the young lady looked down to the floor and noticed tucked into the corner of the coach a bright red string pull purse. She stooped and picked it up wondering what it was. She opened it up gently letting its contents fall into her lap; her diamond encrusted locket.. She put her hands to her face “O my” she gasped in tears of joy this time. She fumbled for the handkerchief which she had placed up her sleeve, but there was no handkerchief. She was completely perplexed and dazed as to the evening events, so much so that, she failed to see from her carriage window a lady dressed in white walking across the fields into the night and into the unknown. ©

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Page 21

Want to pay us nothing to sell your home?

Simply instruct Indigo Residential to market your property and we will enter you into our prize draw every month.*

Visit our website www.indigo-res.co.uk

If you are thinking about selling your property please call us for a free market appraisal.

Ampthill & villages: 01525 213321 • Barton Road: 01582 847800 • Stopsley: 01582 512000 • Leagrave: 01582 490696 T&Cs. The draw will take place monthly. All customers marketing their property via Indigo Residential across all four branches will be included continuously until they win the draw or their sale has completed. In order to qualify you must sell your property to a buyer introduced via Indigo Residential. If you are already in a sole agency agreement with another estate agent you must check the terms and conditions to avoid paying two fees, we can advise you on this.

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Page 22

T.H.E. BEST BUTCHERS

* INTERESTING RANGE OF SPECIALITY SAUSAGES

Telephone (01908) 375275 www.bestbutcher.co.uk

Unit 5, Lower Rectory Farm, Great Brickhill, Milton Keynes, Bucks MK17 9AF

Please telephone: 07903 171384

Mammoth Man's Awesome Autumnal Avocado with sweetcorn, sweet chilli and lime sauce.

This works well as side salad for grilled chicken. You could make the sauce in advance and I'd be inclined to make double or treble the amount as you can freeze the sauce ready for next time.

For 4 servings.

You'll need...

4 corn cobs 10 g fresh mint, chopped 10 g fresh coriander, chopped 2 avocados, peeled, stoned and cut into 3 cm pieces 4 large spring onions, finely sliced on an angle For the sweet chilli and lime sauce 1 red pepper

40 g of caster sugar 75 ml rice vinegar 1 tbsp fish sauce 2 small red chillies, deseeded and finely chopped 5 cm piece of fresh ginger, peeled and finely chopped 1 clove garlic, peeled and crushed Finely grated zest of 1 lime, plus 2 tbsp of the juice Pre-heat the oven to 220C / 425F / gas mark 7. Starting with the sauce, put the red pepper on a small oven tray and roast for 25 min, until soft and blackened all over. When cool enough to handle, peel and discard skin, and remove and discard the seeds and stalk. Place the pepper in the food in a pestle and use the mortar to make a smooth paste. Alternatively use your processor if you have one.

Put the sugar, vinegar and fish

sauce into a small pan on a medium heat on the stove, bring to a boil, stirring to melt the sugar, and leave to bubble for 5 to 6 min, until the syrup is thick and reduced to about half. Off the heat, stir in the chillies, ginger, garlic and red pepper paste / puree mixture, and leave to cool. Once cool, stir in the lime zest and juice, and set aside.

Turn the grill on high and once hot place the corn cobs underneath, turning regularly, until fairly browned all over, cut off the kernels and mix in a large bowl with the chilli sauce, herbs, avocado and spring onion. Salt and black pepper to taste.

As I said above, perfect with grilled chicken and some warm flatbread or pitta.

Luvly Jubbly!

1st November STEPH Happy Birthday Squiffy - my Child Bride

From your Slipper xxx

Hereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a bit more mischief that a kind reader has sent in: How many people do you need in a room to have an even chance that two of them have the same birthday?

Answer below

19th October A very, very Happy Birthday to Katy

Lots of love your dutiful husband xx

For a Free 1st Class MILK DELIVERY SERVICE TELEPHONE 01525 402206 Please see our website at www.mauldendairies.co.uk We are now delivering to Greenfield, Flitton and Pulloxhill too!

Maulden Dairies Warren Farm, Woburn Street, Millbrook 23

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Page 23

When you advertise in The Fuddler - youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Page 24

Your advertisement in The Fuddler is only a click away!

If you have decided that you too would like an advert in The Fuddler all you have to do is email details to martin@thefuddler.com

Hello everyone! I am an actress starring in a very regal and lavish costume drama that is currently being shown on your televisions.

If it helps I have also done a spell doing some time travelling. (and that’s a huge clue!) But who am I? Answer at the foot of the page.

With The Imp 1. ‘When my son was young years old.’

2. ‘He was fuming, he flew up the roof.’

3. ‘I’m seven and a half and it’s the oldest I’ve ever been.’

4. ‘You should put an advert in the newspapers window.’

5. ‘Is the interview at the shop in London ? No, it’s at their shop in London.’

6. ‘He’s only playing one night, the 10th and the 11th

7. ‘We went to Wembley stadium. Is that the O2 ?’

8. ‘See you in two and a half weeks and a couple of days’ 9. ‘You’ve got a huge family, I have.’

10. ‘You could ask my husband. He won’t know though - he’s really rather stupid.’

11. ‘I was a bit disappointed with my all day breakfast - I’d finished it by 11.00!’

Thanks again Imp

Happy 10th birthday Roo, for 10th October. Life begins in double figures (time to get a job?)! Lots of love Mum, Richard, Granni, Dotty and all who put up with love you

With Basher McGraw Why is it that, in our dizzy, world, we have to succumb to ‘change’; when all we really long for is the stability of the faithful and familiar?

The latest incident was a trip to a well known department store when it was discovered that the loved well known fashion house, (not BHS) had overnight gone into liquidation.

Basher’s remark in being told this was simply, ‘OK, I will go and find a fig leaf or two; at least they are guaranteed especially at this time of the year’.

RIDGMONT STATION Tea Rooms A delightful hidden gem!

FRESHLY MADE FOOD ...

CAFÉ MENU x A selection of teas, coffees

and soft drinks x Home made cake and scones x Cream teas are our speciality! x Please note we are closed on Mondays

sandwiches x Toasted paninis x Plus lots more! x Great value and a friendly service!

LOCAL TAKE-AWAY SERVICE AVAILABLE x Telephone 01525 287 120 or

mobile 07861 732 850 for pre-orders x Collection point for takeaway orders

BIRTHDAY PARTIES We can also cater for up to 16 people for a special Birthday Party!

RIDGMONT STATION | STATION ROAD | RIDGMONT BEDFORDSHIRE | MK43 OXP T: 01525 287 120 M: 07861 732 850 E:ridgmonttearoom@gmail.com Full disabled access, toilets and free car park

HOW TO FIND US: By rail alight at Ridgmont Station By road follow station signs from A507

Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Jenna Coleman - Victoria

x SMALL

x Hot soups and jacket potatoes x A selection of fresh

Page 25

EN E S V! T S A N O

THIS MONTH’S CHESS PUZZLE Can you help with this one? It’s white to play and checkmate in 2 moves.

But how? If you can work it out please tell us and why not challenge our chess aficionado to a real match?

LOUNGE BAR RE-VAMP! Our lounge bar is shortly to be revamped - please watch this space for details for progress!

Also - we now serve Prosecco by the glass at just £6.50 for 200 ml!

Saturday 26th November Put a note in your diary as it’s our inaugural

CHEESE FESTIVAL You are invited to come along and sample cheeses from around the globe for just £5 (and there’s plenty of extras to tickle the taste buds) and help raise money for St John’s Hospice Moggerhanger.

The shenanigans take place during the afternoon with live music, plenty of banter, and possibly a surprise or two as well!

Saturday 8th October

QUIZ NIGHT EVERY WEDNESDAY

THE 12th AMPTHILL PIE FESTIVAL!!

Our highly popular quiz is every Wednesday starting at 8.00pm sharp. Come and test your knowledge with our guest Quizmasters everyone welcome.

It’s another big Charity do this year for St John’s Hospice Moggerhanger.

Pies arrive from about 11.00am, judging from about 1.00pm and tasting later!

Ampthill Park Hub Tel: 01525 406256

Ampthill Park Hub, Woburn Street, Ampthill MK45 2HX adjacent Ampthill Town Football Club

GIVE YOUR CHILDREN A TREAT THIS HALFͲTERM WEEK AT THE HUB!!

Why not bring the children along to Ampthill Park during half term, where there’s a fun family Explorer Challenge on Tuesday October 25th and Thursday October 27th (weather permitting), and our Giant Connect 4 is a very popular game!

Come and enjoy a quality LAVAZZA coffee, teas, ice creams and cakes or let us tempt you to a range of delicious meals including Paninis, sandwiches, ‘gourmet’ burgers, jacket potatoes, pasties, sausage rolls, bacon rolls etc. all served in the lovely rural setting in Ampthill’s historic Country Park.

Lots of seating inside and out!

Everybody welcome plus the dog (on a lead)!

Plenty of parking + toilets with baby changing facilities

FOOD & DRINK SERVED UNTIL LATE When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Page 26

HUMAN GIVENS ‘A NEW APROACH’ Ben Keenan

The world of counselling/psychotherapy is a very different place to what it was even ten years ago! Neurological science has provided insights that when combined with the best of other approaches provides a fast and effective solution focused therapy (SFBT) that is embodied in Human Givens. Treatment does not just mean sitting and endlessly talking, it is also about effectively understanding the issues and providing realistic change.

Depression, Sleeplessness, Anxiety, OCD, Phobia’s, PTSD, Addiction (drugs, cigarettes, alcohol, food)

These are difficult and sometimes dangerous emotions.

For the majority of people they are not biological illnesses but complex arousals that can arise from our spectrum of thought and emotion. These conditions arise as a result of circumstances preventing our innate needs being met. This gives access to fast, safe, non invasive, and drug free methods of effective treatment in as few sessions as possible, often in weeks not years!

Having had 27 years’ experience of offering emotional support in the voluntary sector, I retrained in the Human Givens approach. Achieving a distinction in the Level 2 Diploma in March 2015 allowed me to start accepting clients. Now operating as an HG.DIP.P Trainee (with supervision) as I work towards a higher level of accreditation. I also carry comprehensive professional insurance.

If you want to learn more, the Human Givens research is freely available on www.humangivens.org. Alternatively, you can contact me for a free initial interview. A fee is payable for treatment but it is very much dependent on ability to pay.

Human Givens means it no longer has to be this way for a great many people.

Therapy thoughts.

Over 40 years ago the great Milton H Erickson said: “Every person’s map of the world is as unique as their thumbprint. There are no two people alike. No two people who understand the same sentence the same way... so in dealing with people, you try not to fit them to your concept of what they should be”.

This is why the Human Givens approach (apart from its own research) takes the best from other approaches and is also informed by the latest neurobiological research. “If people are in difficulties because of being pushed into one mould then pushing them into yet another is rarely likely to be of benefit”.

Ben Keenan.

Ben Keenan Ͳ 07860 195303 or email: benkeenan@ntlworld.com

With Dr. Benjamin J Häagen - ‘Traveller Extraordinaire’ Back from Oslo and what a trip! The conference went well and Flora and I found the Gelateria. The trip was well worth the time to get there. I do love visiting other cultures, especially when they are so similar to us in many ways, yet possess those little aspects that remind you that you are not in England!

We must not forget dear reader that England is a wonderful country. As is the entire UK! I have been fortunate in having a career that has enabled me so many opportunities for travel.

Flora was saying to me on our return from Norway that she would never have had the experiences in foreign adventures if it were not for her Uncle!

It would appear that the Baskin-Robbins business will take her too many places, some accompanying Ashley and many on her own.

I met up with Kathryn upon my return. I am desperate to know what is going on in the many secretive meetings she has been attending. These weird and wonderful manuscripts do seem to hold a magical fascination. Kathryn has promised that she will explain more to me shortly but at the moment the work she and others are doing has to be kept secret. Kathryn assures me she is safe and this work will not involve any dangerous adventures!

I met Kathryn in London a few days later. I invited her to dine with me at Rules. In the year Napoleon opened his campaign in Egypt, Thomas Rule promised his despairing family that he would say goodbye to his wayward past and settle down. If history is not your bag dear reader, the year was 1798! No sooner said than he opened an oyster bar in Convent Garden. To the surprise and disbelief of his family, his enterprise proved to be not only successful but lasting.

Contemporary writers were soon singing the praises of Rules’ “porter, pies and oysters”, and remarking on the “rakes, dandies and superior intelligence’s who comprise its clientele”.

Rules still flourishes, the oldest restaurant in London and one of the most celebrated in the world. Throughout its long history the tables of Rules have been crowded with writers, artists, lawyers, journalists and actors. As well as being frequented by great literary talents – including Charles Dickens, William Makepeace Thackeray, John Galsworthy and H G Wells – Rules has also appeared in novels by Rosamond Lehmann, Evelyn Waugh, Graham Greene, John Le Carré, Dick Francis, Penelope Lively and Claire Rayner.

However we did meet earlier in the day in between her meetings and I took her to Ruby Violet at Kings Cross! All their ice cream is made in London’s Victorian Dairy in Tufnell Park. Kathryn settled for the Blood Orange and Campari Sorbet, setting her mood for the remainder of the day and I had my all-time favourite of theirs, Rhubarb and Verjuice Ice Cream. It was a close call though with the Salted Caramel with Almond Nut Brittle calling loudly!

So with one of the best days in London enjoying delicious London Ice cream at lunch and Rules for dinner, we headed home as I listened intently to more of Kathryn’s work and getting some idea in what land our next trouvaille will occur.

Dr. Benjamin J Häagen If you would like to grab an ad in next month’s edition just ping an email to martin@thefuddler.com

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Page 27

The latest to suffer interrogation over the past few weeks into the alleged spying case is the Cross Party & Political Police Officer (C-3P-O) Yogi Bear.

It was very much noticed that he continually darts from Lower House (LH) to Upper House (UH). One evenings movements were recorded as follows: LH 17.13; UH 17.43; LH 18.58; UH 19.42; LH 20.44 etc., etc.. The incredibly knackered investigator ran out of paper in his notebook at 23.10 just as Yogi Bear entered the Lower House as “time” was being called.

After all the unwanted exercise for the investigator, someone then pointed out that cartoon characters cannot possibly operate in the real world, so a new line of investigation is now under way.

Ret Insp Morse Code On a warm Thursday evening The Jigsaw Club in Ampthill met for a very special evening. The members were celebrating the 40th birthday of the club which was formed in 1976. As well as the current members celebrating there were special guests from the community. They included members of local charities and businesses who have supported The Jigsaw Club over several years.

Other guests present had been helpers when the club was first formed. During the evening ‘The Victoria and Terry McGrath Award’ was presented to Lynn and Roy Goodall for their outstanding service to the Jigsaw Club.

The Jigsaw Club is for people with physical disabilities living in Ampthill and the surrounding area. The club meets once a fortnight in the Social Centre in Ampthill, anyone interested in joining or helping should contact Jan on 07940218634

Homemade food served in a friendly and relaxed atmosphere

CHRISTMAS AT DONATELLO’S CALL: 01525 404666

With a choice of 5 separate dining rooms we can offer you a private room for your meal where you can enjoy an intimate atmosphere for 2 plus, or a larger room for parties of up to 10 Ͳ 20 people.

Please come and choose your room and discuss your menu choices as we can offer menus to suit all dietary requirements.

Complete Tyre Support

Alternatively please ring Michael on 01525 404666 or email donatellosbooked@gmail.com

AND FREE BOTTLE OF WINE WITH YOUR MEAL FOR YOUR PARTY ORGANISER FOR CHRISTMAS PARTIES OVER 6 BOOKED BEFORE THE END OF OCTOBER

Call us now!

0844 8000 333 www.threecountiestyres.com

OPENING TIMES: Monday evening 6.00 Ͳ 9.00 Tuesday to Friday lunchtime 12.00 Ͳ 2.00 Tuesday to Thursday evening 6.00 Ͳ 10.00 Friday and Saturday evening 6.00 Ͳ 11.00 www.donatellospizzeria.co.uk

91, Dunstable Street Ampthill Tel: (01525) 404666 Free parking available

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Page 28

With Geoffrey THE Golfer Best friends Jack and Len decide to play a quick round of golf.

As they were a bit short on time they decided to play just 9 holes. Jack said to Len ‘Why don’t we add a bit of fun to the game and make the game worthwhile at least for one of us and spot £5.00 on the lowest score for the day?’ Len agreed and they enjoy a splendid game. However, after the 8th hole Len is ahead by one stroke but cuts his ball into the rough on the 9th.

‘Would you help me find my ball; you look over there.’ he said to Jack. After

about 5 minutes, neither has had any luck, and since a lost ball carries a two stroke penalty, Len pulled a ball from his pocket and dropped it on the ground. ‘I’ve found my ball!’ he announced triumphantly.

Jack looked at him forlornly and said, ‘After all the years we’ve been friends, you’d cheat me on golf for a measly fiver?’

‘What do you mean cheat?’ replied Len ‘I found my ball sitting right here!’

‘You’re a liar too’ said Jack in amazement ‘I’ll have you know I’ve been standing on your ball for the last five minutes!’

GTG

with Auntie Vi Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.

Hiya Sis Thanks for everything and all the very best on your pilgrimage!

self: N ot e t o ddler. u F n i d a ristmas m Book Ch ddler.co u f e h t @ artin Email m

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Page 29

With Lauren Louella Boughalls Hello again to everyone! Very many thanks to everyone who had a go at last month’s poser. Many congratulations to Robbie, Tony, Brian, Piers, Katy, Josh, Russell and all the many other people who correctly identified the seat in the Alameda in memory of Petro (Sid) Czekaluk. Now this month once again one of our readers has been out and about scouring the towns and villages of Fuddlerland looking for an unusual photograph to bring you.

So, do you recognise this photo and where it might be?

Receive sms

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Book online at www.airportsdirectmk.com T: 01908 22 55 23 or 0800 707 6003 e: info@airportsdirectmk.com

If you think you know drop us an email to martin@thefuddler.com Answer next month!

MOT TESTING STATION IN AMPTHILL We cater for MOT and Servicing for all your individual requirements whilst also accommodating fleet needs.

Ampthill MOT Centre have a fully featured Class IV MOT testing bay. We launched the service in early 2009, serving Herts, Beds and Bucks. Fully qualified MOT inspectors are available for cars and small vans, with over 40 years experience. Authorised vehicle testing station approved by the vehicle inspectorate.

At Ampthill MOT Centre, we carry out servicing and repairs to all makes and models. To prolong the life of your vehicle it is important that you have it serviced regularly. We service all vehicle types and models, including cars, vans, miniͲcoaches & small plant / equipment. If you have your vehicle serviced with us, it will not invalidate the manufacturer's warranty.

Competitive rates.

Collection & delivery

Fault finding

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Engine rebuilds

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Tyres & Exhausts

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We are a family run business who have been working in the motor trade for over 40 years

Total Fleet Care

Unit 5, Vass Industrial Estate, Station Road, Ampthill, MK45 2RB SERVICING

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Telephone: 01525 405055 Web: www.totalfleetcare.com

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Page 30

Here we delve more into the whimsical, wacky and interesting world of Montgolfier:

In a plant shop there were 3 tomato plants about 1 foot high with a lot of cherry sized tomatoes on them Two priced at £10 and one priced at £17. There was a lot of comment about them.

I saw a sign saying Massive Carpet Sale, I didn’t go in as it didn’t say what size it was.

The reason moths never get fat is because they only eat holes.

A school friend said he was born whilst his mother was on holiday. I said that wasn’t possible.

A Great Uncle of mine was killed at the Battle of The Little Big Horn. He wasn’t actually in the battle, he was camping in the next field and went to complain about all the noise and someone shot him.

Why do we always use capital letters when doing crosswords?

Notice by a farm gate. Meadow Hay for sale. Is there any other type?

I thought I would grow some seedless grapes in my greenhouse. I went everywhere to buy seeds but wasn’t able to get any wherever I went.

A previous address of mine was Flat 1. I received one letter addressed to Fat 1.

A friend of mine made a new dress for herself - I said it would look better with a belt. She replied that you can wear a belt with or without it. Sounds interesting.

I can buy ready cooked beetroot at the greengrocer but never ready cooked potatoes or sprouts. Why?

Don’t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Page 31

BOB AMBLER HOME DESIGNS

Kitchens – Bedrooms – Home Offices

Carpentry

Replacement Kitchen Doors and Worktops

A complete design, supply & installation service

Building Preservation Specialists x

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Woodworm Treatments

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Dry / Wet Rot Treatments

x

Basement Waterproofing

Telephone/Fax (01525) 406655 Mobile: 07850 727752

01525 405393 07889 058345

16 Tavistock Avenue, Ampthill, Bedford. MK45 2RY

Free Designs and Quotations

Episode 55 ......................

A Storm in a Coffee Cup

It is said that 'Chaos Theory' is when a butterfly flaps its wings in the Amazon rain forest and sometime later there is a hurricane in India.

Something similar occurred, albeit on a smaller scale, to yours truly the other day when I was off for a jolly with Fuddler. I had already been called by Fuddler that morning to confirm our rendezvous at the railway station where he would collect me. I was on my way back from getting a coffee for my journey, when I was hit full on by a sweet old lady who was trying in vain to defy gravity by staying upright whilst holding on to her small Scottish terrier and her shopping trolley. She managed

to stay on her feet largely due to her falling into me whilst emptying the contents of my coffee cup all down my white shirt. Her trolley did not fare any better as its contents spilled out on the pavement.

Tins of vegetables, soup, and various forms of fruit causing havoc with the pedestrians who were trying desperately not to be bowled over. The little dog did not want to be left out of the events and caused a mini crisis when he chased after another dog on the opposite side of the road, paying no attention to the highway code and running out in front of a red double decker bus. The taxi driver behind the bus was completely oblivious to all events that had taken place in front and was taking out his frustration with the bus by beeping his horn constantly and quite unnecessarily. Nor

Need to get more active? You walk at your own pace in a friendly group. Choose from: Longer walks about 3 miles, last about an hour and a quarter, possibly with hills and uneven terrain.

NEW!! Shorter walks about 2 miles, last about an hour on easier terrain, slower pace. It’s all free - just turn up.

Next walks - all start at 10.00am:

7th October 21st October 4th November

Maulden, The Brache (rec ground) Ampthill Park, west car park Danish Camp, Willington

For further information please contact: Lynda on 01234 740788 or at olivetree47@googlemail.com Or Laurie on 01525 403950 or at lalowe@btinternet.com or see http://ampthillheathwalks.blogspot.co.uk

email: Jim@dunritepreservation.co.uk

was the man aware of the events around him, as he seemingly could not believe his luck at an empty taxi right there by his side, and attempted to get in. The taxi drivers annoyance at the bus was lessened at the prospect of a potential fare, but his bad mood soon returned as his passenger had now disappeared. The man trying to get into the taxi had not disappeared, but had trodden on a can of processed peas and was now lying on the ground staring up into the sky, wondering what had just occurred. The bus had now moved on and the taxi with its driver mumbling and grumbling to himself about bus drivers and time wasting potential customers and went on his way. I thought about returning home and changing my shirt, but by now I had

only 5 minutes until my train, I decided to just go and meet Fuddler as arranged and try to limit the damage of the stain in the trains bathroom. As I returned to my seat with the shirt now slightly less stained but soaking wet, a concerned and good natured fellow passenger looked over and remarked "had an accident have we", "you would not believe it" I said miserably, and I still had not had any coffee ... to drink that is.

Can a butterfly actually cause a hurricane? I don't know, but when I was involuntarily holding up the old lady who started it all off, I noticed her rather large brightly coloured butterfly broach she had in her purple beret.

"Chaos in the midst of chaos isn't funny, but chaos in the midst of order is."

Electrical Contractor Domestic and Industrial Your local Electrical Contractor All types of testing and certification undertaken

FREE QUOTATIONS NICEIC Approved Contractor Working with Ampthill Town Council 11 Cedar Close, Ampthill, Bedford, MK45 2UD

Tel & Fax: 01525 714057

When you advertise in The Fuddler - you’re online too at www.thefuddler.com!

Page 32

Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t worry if you missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com