The Fuddler February 2019

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Est. 2002

Sick PC or laptop? Call the Doc for Hardware & software Diagnosis & treatment

01525-402227 john.stafford@compu-doc.co.uk

Hello young lovers wherever you are and a very big welcome to this latest edition of your Fuddler! As always we very much hope you will enjoy this issue - you will find lots of interesting stories inside plus the usual fun and nonsense and of course

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those all important messages from our advertisers! Do please look carefully through as you never know what you might find in The Fuddler! Don’t forget now is a very good time to book your advertising in The Fuddler for Mother’s Day!!

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Perfect for Valentine’s Day CHEESEMANS PHARMACY OF AMPTHILL Tel: 01525 402173

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A.C.G MASSAGE Call Alfie to book your home visit 07861 198696

07977 173452

Call Kelly Marie today for a free quote All aspects of tree and gardening work carried out Weeding, Digging, Pruning, Grass Cutting, Hedges Trimmed, Trees Pruned, Jungles Cleared and all rubbish taken away Please Call:

01525 794103 / 01908 887295 When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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ŵƉƚŚŝůů 'ůĂƐƐ ĞŶƚƌĞ YƵĂůŝƚLJ tŝŶĚŽǁƐ Ͳ ŽŽƌƐ Ͳ ŽŶƐĞƌǀĂƚŽƌŝĞƐ Ͳ 'ůĂƐƐ DĞƌĐŚĂŶƚƐ Ͳ 'ůĂnjŝŶŐ ŽŶƚƌĂĐƚŽƌƐ ϭϮ ŵƉƚŚŝůů ƵƐŝŶĞƐƐ WĂƌŬ͕ ^ƚĂƚŝŽŶ ZŽĂĚ͕ ŵƉƚŚŝůů͕ ĞĚĨŽƌĚƐŚŝƌĞ͕ D<ϰϱ ϮYt dĞůĞƉŚŽŶĞ͗ ϬϭϱϮϱ ϰϬϯϬϭϱ ͬ ϰϬϯϲϬϵ &Ădž͗ ϬϭϱϮϱ ϰϬϮϱϮϭ ǁǁǁ͘ĂŵƉƚŚŝůůŐůĂƐƐĐĞŶƚƌĞ͘ĐŽ͘ƵŬ

With energy costs rising and temperatures falling why not save on your monthly bills and complement your house with great looking, thermally efficient windows and doors.

tŝŶĚŽǁƐ hWs Θ ůƵŵŝŶŝƵŵ Zϵ tŝŶĚŽǁƐ sĞƌƚŝĐĂů ^ůŝĚŝŶŐ tŝŶĚŽǁƐ

ŽŶƐĞƌǀĂƚŽƌŝĞƐ

ŽŽƌƐ

džĐĞůůĞŶƚ ƚŚĞƌŵĂů ŝŶƐƵůĂƚŝŽŶ ƌĞĚƵĐŝŶŐ ĞŶĞƌŐLJ ĐŽƐƚƐ͘ tĂƌŵĞƌ ŝŶ ƚŚĞ ǁŝŶƚĞƌ ŵŽŶƚŚƐ͘ ƵĂů ĂĐƚŝŽŶ ƐĞůĨͲĐůĞĂŶ ŐůĂƐƐ͘

ƌĂŶŐĞ ŽĨ ůƵŵŝŶŝƵŵ͕ ŽŵƉŽƐŝƚĞ ĂŶĚ hWs ŽŽƌƐ͘

,ĂƉƉLJ sĂůĞŶƚŝŶĞ͛Ɛ ĂLJ͊

EŽ ǁŝŶĚŽǁ Žƌ ŐůĂnjŝŶŐ ũŽď ƚŽŽ ƐŵĂůů WƵƚ LJŽƵƌ ƚƌƵƐƚ ŝŶ Ă ĐŽŵƉĂŶLJ ƚŚĂƚ ŚĂƐ ďĞĞŶ ƚƌĂĚŝŶŐ ĨŽƌ ŽǀĞƌ ϰϬ LJĞĂƌƐ͊ &Žƌ Ăůů LJŽƵƌ ǁŝŶĚŽǁ͕ ĚŽŽƌƐ ĂŶĚ ĐŽŶƐĞƌǀĂƚŽƌLJ ŶĞĞĚƐ ĐĂůů ƵƐ ŶŽǁ Žƌ ǀŝƐŝƚ ŽƵƌ ǁĞďƐŝƚĞ͘ Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

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The Accountants you can count on!!

DH Cox & Sons General Builders x x x

Accounts, Payroll, Bookkeeping, Tax, Business Advice ... and much more. Ring to book a free, noͲobligation meeting today!

114 High Street, Cranfield, Beds, MK43 0DG Tel: 01234 752566 Email: info@vowles.co.uk www.vowles.co.uk

Fancy doing something new and meeting some amazing people this year? A local befriending charity is looking for volunteers to help make a real difference in the community! Respite at Home Volunteers are currently recruiting befriending volunteers in Ampthill, Flitwick and the surrounding area. This is your chance to make a positive and immediate difference to the lives of people living with life limiting illnesses and their carers in your local community. If you have a couple of hours to spare each week or fortnight, enjoy spending time chatting and listening, have a sense of humour and want to meet some genuinely interesting and inspiring people then this an opportunity for you. As part of our befriending team you’ll receive full training and support as we match you with one of our families who are looking for a little extra companionship and help to live well with illnesses. As a volunteer you don’t have to have prior experience of a life limiting illness, but you do have to have warmth, reliability, empathy, common sense and a ready smile. For more information about how to join our team contact Nicola Mills 01234 743063 or email: respiteathomevolunteers@aol.co.uk

Flitwick Pet Services We care for your pets while you’re at work or on holiday x x x x x x x

Countryside walks Home boarding Puppy care Canine first aid trained Day care Police checked/fully insured Secure transportation

www.flitwickpetservices.co.uk or find us on facebook

07379 690824 / 01525 635465

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Over 30 years’ experience Local friendly services Can undertake all aspects of building and maintenance to an exceptional standard No job too small Free & competitive quotes

Call Dave 07976 766143 or 01525 841670 dhcoxbuilding@hotmail.co.uk Flitwick & Ampthill Sea Cadet Unit are holding a Jumble Sale on Sunday 3rd March at Althorp Close, Flitwick MK45 1HY. The sale will be held from 11am - 1pm and entrance is 50p. The unit is open from 09:00am - 10:00am to receive Jumble or it can be dropped off at the Sea Cadets Unit, Althorp Close, Flitwick on a Monday or Thursday 7:30pm 8:30pm the week beginning 25th February. Why not go along and see if you can grab some bargains? Tea/coffee and cakes will also be available. Tell your family and friends! All proceeds to Flitwick & Ampthill Sea Cadets. Registered Charity 287167 Meet at ARA club Manton Lane Bedford MK41 7PF. Thursday 21st February 7.30 pm Mark Ward, - Editor-in-Chief of Nature’s Home (RSPB Magazine). This evening’s talk is entitled ‘16,000 Species and Counting’, - an insight into the many different species all around us. Suitable for Experts and Novices, RSPB membership not essential. Entrance fee, group members £1 Guest £2 annual group membership £5. Reg. Charity No. 207076, more info www.rspb.org.uk/groups/bedford

OFFER Winter Coat Dry Cleaned

£10

(Does not include down, suede, wax or leather) Our Many Services Include Specialist Drycleaning Wedding Dress cleaning Shoe Repair Key Cutting Shoe & Bag Cleaning Ironing Service

@BradleysDryCleaners

NOW OPEN EVENINGS BRADLEYS DRYCLEANERS 109 Dunstable Street, Ampthill, Bedford. 01525 405817 Open Mon - Fri 8.30am - 7pm ] Sat 9am - 4pm

When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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LORD DEE’S PONDERINGS

Everything seems well on the estate and things. Duster lV has been careering around in the snow, the fish are happy because the heron has not so far revisited and I turned the heating on in their pond. In the meantime a very Happy Birthday to Doreen for the 7th and of course the Lady Miriam for the 18th. Ciao

A BRIANISM (With fond memories) My five a day co-ordinator works behind the bar in the pub.

Small company requires help with accounts and general office work. Flexible working times, days and hours available. Please contact Andi on 07901 722649

Across: 1 Hubris, 4 Fellow, 7 Scoundrel, 9 Note, 10 Sage, 11 Shrek, 13 Avaunt, 14 Thesis, 15 Buffet, 17 Skated, 19 Reiki, 20 Rise, 22 Adze, 23 Transpire, 24 Teases, 25 Deadly

Down: 1 Hernia, 2 Race, 3 Sought, 4 Fidget, 5 Lees, 6 Widens, 7 Steadfast, 8 Lassitude, 11 Sneer, 12 Khaki, 15 Bereft, 16 Tennis, 17 Skyped, 18 Dreary, 21 Eros, 22 Area

When the time comes to say goodbye

“The Fuddler” is published by MDA Publications. The views expressed herein are not necessarily those of the publisher. No part of this publication may be copied in any form or by any means without written permission of the Publisher. Copyright MDA Publications.

Like to book an ad, or ask about our absurdly low rates please ring Martin on

Talk to Pam Woods Civil Funeral Celebrant for a service that reflects only your own beliefs and wishes. 01234 742 3 07515282755 pamwoods55@gmail.com

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Or if you prefer, drop us an email to martin@thefuddler.com

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When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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Guttering Problems? Gutters Cleaned.

JH ELECTRICAL

Leaking Gutters repaired.

• DOMESTIC • INDUSTRIAL • COMMERCIAL

New Gutters Fitted.

24 HR CALLOUT AVAILABLE

Call Rob on 01525 552066 or 07977 206403

Bradnam Guttering 2

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Here’s another of Marjorie’s fine crosswords for our entertainment Across: Down: 1 Sleeveless jerkin (6) 1 Frippery (6) 4 Coarse laugh (6) 2 Land measurement (4) 7 Rational (9) 3 Short knife (6) 9 Run away (4) 4 Arraign (6) 10 Type of Pacific salmon (4) 5 Fashionably elegant (4) 11 Condescend (5) 6 Envelop (6) 13 Captivate (6) 7 Damnation (9) 14 Wasn’t just given (6) 8 Orange flavoured liqueur (9) 15 Groups of eight (6) 11 Popular pub game (5) 17 Loathing (6) 12 Water nymph (5) 19 Spirited horse (5) 15 Eloquent speaker (6) 20 Vast period of time (4) 16 Suppress (6) 22 Breakfast cereal (4) 17 Playing card suit (6) 23 Dracula? (9) 18 Gloomy (6) 24 Irritate (6) 21 Cranny (4) 25 Informal gathering (6) 22 Ear related (4)

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Sandra’s been busy again looking through her big book of words (dictionary?) and brings us the word below. (Nothing to do with the crossword.) Just look at the hexagon and see whether or not the word jumps out at you! (Answer at the bottom of the page if it doesn’t!)

O

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email: supaspark@tiscali.co.uk

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Garage Door Solutions Ltd Your local garage door expert for:

Replacements, Repairs and Spares x All makes & designs available x 24 Hour repair service x No call out charge x All work guaranteed x Free quotations Call us now on: 01525 721615 / 07761 093468 Website: www.garagedoorsolutionsltd.co.uk Or see the yellow pages

3, Woodcock Walk, Flitwick, Bedfordshire, MK 45 1RD

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Commenced

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All electrical work undertaken

M

All by a friendly local established company

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Ex display models Clearance, up to 25% off !

Visit our 'Discount Den' for more details. There will be a room in our showroom full of discounted Fires Stoves and Accessories. Don't miss out! 1, Bedford Street, Ampthill, Beds Tel: 01525 841199 www.ampthillfireplaces.co.uk Mon - Fri: 10am - 5pm Sat: 10am - 4pm When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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With The Duchess of Troll Reflections in the Dewpond.

‘The No 200 Bus’

NOW OPEN Come and discover Ampthill’s rich history and learn about the towns association with Henry VIII and why Kit Williams chose the town as the hiding place for the treasure of his 1979 book Masquerade. The museum occupies part of the top floor of Ampthill Fireplaces showroom in Bedford Street and is open 6 days a week. Admission is free

‘Possibly the smallest museum in the world’

The Five Old Boys and the Mrs Sam were continuing to talk about Chicksands, once a Priory, then during W.W.II a base, mainly remembered as an American Base then and for a long time during the Cold War. Americans posted here, never went off base, having had a small U.S town built on site, with everything an American could wish for, a taste of home when posted to a foreign land. Personnel did rent houses in surrounding villages, so blended in and locals got to know them. As the Mrs Sam recalled gave work to locals, looking after the house and the gardens, babysitting too. As locals paid one shilling and three pence per hour for babysitting, U.S. service personal paid half a crown (two shillings and six pence) Good money and fed you too, most had a housekeeper and gardener, 7 up a new taste, skin on New potatoes, (never have scraped New potatoes,) and tasty U.S. dishes and wonderful ice cream fondly remembered. The Americans loved talking to the locals, many that the Mrs Sam babysat for were Officers, fondly remembered, a couple both doctors, who had long shift patterns. Always returned me safely to the parents, and still had time for a matter. Recall when my Father told about W. W. II and his chance meeting of an American soldier, on his tour of duty on the Contin ent, whom he befriended . The two exchanged spoons, as a sign of their friendship. Still treasured, as a memento of a parent and his friend. Silence for a moment, broken by, a do you remember the Elephant Cage? Dominating the landscape. Of wooden construction, for

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

communication purposes. When the U.S. left this was decommissioned and dismantled. No longer needed. A signpost that when you had been to the East Coast you were nearly home. The base is still in use, as is part for Central Bedfordshire Council, the houses now privately owned. A bus stop near by, can walk the extensive woods, or for fitness folks amongst us a fantastic bike track. In Shefford the tributaries of The River Flit and the River Hit join The River Ivel, the bus route soon winds its way to Clifton, in a car you might miss it, in a bus the slow turn past the Duckpond, the ducklings growing up on their floating deck. Always children stop to feed them on the way to school. Clifton has a church, pubs village hall and where the River goes under the road, meadow fields, past the horse fields, and best of all, shaded by tall trees a fantastic cricket pitch. What a lovely setting! The bus meanders along narrow country lanes to Stanford, Of course any place with Ford in its name must have had a river crossing. somewhere, The Five Old Boys were looking out for it, mind you often rivers have a way of changing course over time, even drying up, especially in hot summers, in wet winters they can run again. The Ford could be now the road and not a bridge as such. Another friendly pub stood on the crossroads, The Five Old Boys making another mental note to make a visit for lunch. Wouldn't be them if the day didn't involve food and talking! Much of the next few villages and farming land are part of The Southhill Estate, are diverse and will take you through them next time. D.O.T.

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ŝĚĞĂů ĞLJĞǁĞĂƌ

dŽƚĂů ĞLJĞ ĐĂƌĞ ĨŽƌ ƚŚĞ ǁŚŽůĞ ĨĂŵŝůLJ ŝŶ ƚŚĞ ŚĞĂƌƚ ŽĨ ƚŚĞ ůŽĐĂů ĐŽŵŵƵŶŝƚLJ͘ hŶŝƚ ϯ ,ŝŐŚĨŝĞůĚ ,ŽƵƐĞ ϭϭϬ dŚĞ ,ĂǁƚŚŽƌŶƐ &ůŝƚǁŝĐŬ D<ϰϱ ϭ&E ϬϭϱϮϱ ϳϭϱϳϱϵ /ĚĞĂůĞLJĞǁĞĂƌ͘ĨůŝƚǁŝĐŬΛŐŵĂŝů͘ĐŽŵ ǁǁǁ͘ŝĚĞĂůĞLJĞǁĞĂƌĨůŝƚǁŝĐŬ͘ĐŽ͘ƵŬ

^ŝŐŚƚ dĞƐƚƐ ŽŶƚĂĐƚ ůĞŶƐĞƐ ^ƵŶŐůĂƐƐĞƐ

'ŽŽĚ ůŽŽŬŝŶŐ ĞLJĞǁĞĂƌ ĨĨŽƌĚĂďůĞ E,^ tĞůĐŽŵĞ Ăůů Ϭ ϬϭϱϮϱ ϳϭϱϳϱϵ ƚŽ Ŭ LJŽƵƌ ĂƉƉŽŝŶƚŵĞŶƚ ƚŽĚĂLJ͘ KƚŚĞƌ ŽƉƚŝĐŝĂŶ͛Ɛ ƉƌĞƐĐƌŝƉƚŝŽŶƐ ĂůǁĂLJƐ ǁĞůĐŽŵĞ͘

When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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ARTISANS IN THE YARD

KINGS ARMS PATH GARDENS, AMPTHILL These beautiful gardens are open on the last Sunday of the month from January until October from 2.30 until 5.00pm Adults £1.00 admission under 16’s free Plants for sale. Refreshments available.

With Jimmy The Voice Being full of romance JTV has sent us this picture of a Valentine's card he received. He reckons the heart is on the front ...

... but we reckon that the heart is on the inner part of the card. But, what do you think?

JEWELLERY, PAINTINGS, SCULPTURES IN PEWTER, IRONWORK, TURNED WOOD, FURNITURE, OBJECTS D’ART, CARDS, BOOKS

UNIQUE & CREATED BY LOCAL ARTISANS OPEN FRIDAY SATURDAY 10 - 4 44 HIGH STREET SHEFFORD SG17 5DG REAR OF HARDWARE STORE

or www.projectsinwood.co.uk

Belated Happy Birthday to Pat for 30th January

By Julio Van Peebles Julio’s worries and useless facts: 1) Did you know that the first bomb dropped on Berlin in World War II only killed an elephant? 2) How do you eat a kumquat? 3) Did you know that there is a town in Chile in the Atacama desert where it has never rained? 4) What is the Inland Revenue known as seaside resorts? 5) Did you know that a Bombardier beetle can survive being eaten and come out the other end alive?

‘I waited and waited and when no call came I knew it must be from you.’

Julio’s interesting ‘Pie’ fact: Did you know that a form of pie containing oats or wheat around a honey filling, can be traced back thousands of years to Ancient Egypt ? Happy Birthday Preston for the 15th February

A very Happy Birthday to Stuart for the 5th February

Happy Birthday JD for the 13th February

THE WINGFIELD CLUB 37 Church St, Ampthill, MK45 2PL (01525) Bar - 403321 Office - 841736 thewingfieldclub@tiscali.co.uk

DATES FOR YOUR DIARY

6 NATIONS RUGBY All games shown live on our big screen projector Complimentary food with England games

6 large HD screens showing all main sporting events

Supreme pool table and spacious darts area

Large car park for members

Saturday 16th February

Private parties catered for

Come and Celebrate Valentine’s at our swing night with ‘Dylan’ 8.00pm onwards

Meeting rooms available

Competitively priced Drinks

NEW MEMBERS WELCOME Please fully complete a membership form and hand the money to The Bar staff, Your New Membership card will be posted to your address.

Sunday Meat Raffle & Members Tote

2019 MEMBERSHIP NOW AVAILABLE FROM THE BAR

New Members Welcome

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

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Your local Electrical Contractor All types of testing and certification undertaken PAT testing & Landlords

FREE QUOTATIONS NICEIC Approved Contractor over 25 Years 11 Cedar Close, Ampthill, Bedford, MK45 2UD

07702 080623 Tel & Fax: 01525 714057

Our prescription service means you can have your repeat prescription dispensed and delivered hassle free! FREE DELIVERY TO YOUR DOOR The NHS Electronic Prescription Service allow Doctors to send your prescription to us at Cheeseman’s Pharmacy. We will then dispense your repeat prescription and deliver to your address. We cover/deliver around Ampthill, Clophill, Flitwick, Houghton Conquest, Marston Moretaine, Maulden, Silsoe, Stewartby, Wilstead and Wixams. TO REGISTER OR FOR MORE INFORMATION CALL US NOW ON 01525 402173

CHEESEMANS PHARMACY OF AMPTHILL Tel: 01525 402173

Happy Birthday to Miriam for the 18th February Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said "Parking Fine". So that was nice. 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot. If history repeats itself, and the unexpected always happens, how come we don’t learn from experience? Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes. The chief danger in life is that you may take too many precautions. I could give up chocolate but I’m not a quitter. It only seems like you are doing something wrong when you are worrying. There are three kinds of people; those who can count and those who can’t. My idea of exercise is a good, brisk lay down. My friend’s husband is so silly that he bought a new car because he couldn’t keep up the payments on the old one. If you clean out your vacuum cleaner, have you become a vacuum cleaner? Valentine’s day? I can almost smell the roses that I’ll be sent.

with Auntie Vi Age doesn’t make you forgetful. Having too many silly things to remember makes you forgetful. ‘Can’t catch me!’

Happy Birthday to ‘Wheeze’ for 29th (?) Thought for the month: Lying can be done with words and also with silence.

1. Who sent the 1st Valentine’s card? 2. Who wrote the novel ‘Gigi’? 3. Where would you find a ‘Nock’? 4. What is a ‘Malleus’? 5. In which Dickensian novel would you come across ‘Smike’? 6. A ‘Cria’ is the young of which animal? 7. Where in the US is there a place called ‘Romance’? 8. What is the collective name for a group of ‘Wombats’? 9. I f y o u s u f f e r e d f r o m ‘Philophobia’ what would you fear? 10.What was the name of the wife of ‘Rembrandt’? 1 Charles Duke of Orleans, 2 Colette, 3 Archer’s bow, 4 Small bone in the ear, 5 Nicholas Nickleby, 6 Alpaca, 7 Arkansas, 8 Wisdom, 9 Love, 10 Saskia

Est 1965 Electrical Contractor Domestic and Industrial Rewires & Fuseboard upgrades

FREE PRESCRIPTION DELIVERY

BOB AMBLER HOME DESIGNS

Kitchens – Bedrooms – Home Offices

Carpentry

Replacement Kitchen Doors and Worktops

A complete design, supply & installation service

Building Preservation Specialists x

Damp Proofing

x

Woodworm Treatments

x

Dry / Wet Rot Treatments

x

Basement Waterproofing

Telephone/Fax (01525) 406655 Mobile: 07850 727752

01525 405393 07889 058345

16 Tavistock Avenue, Ampthill, Bedford. MK45 2RY

Free Designs and Quotations

email: Jim@dunritepreservation.co.uk

When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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Beer n o ditati Accre

In addition to our weekly specials and fantastic Sunday Roasts we are pleased to offer ... Coming soon ... Takeaway Menu Our Freshly Cooked Food in your own home!!! (Collection only) 'Fish Supper Friday' Battered Cod, Wholetail Scampi or Fishcakes served with all the trimmings. (Eat in or Takeaway)

Dates for the diary ... 1st February - 16th March 'Guinness Six Nations Rugby' (All England Matches on a Big Screen) Tasty Bar Snacks available before, during & after. 8th February (Friday) Live Music with 'Down South' Local Rock & Blues Cover Band from 8:30pm 14th February is Valentines Day (Thursday) Serving our A la Carte Menu & Valentines Specials in a Romantic Setting. Book Early!! 4th - 10th March is British Pie WeekServing Mouth Watering Homemade Pies with all the trimmings and Extra Gravy. Serving food 7 days a week (Until 9.00pm Monday to Saturday and 12.00 to 6.00pm Sunday)

To Book call 01525 280565

The White Horse, 1 Mill Road, Husborne Crawley, Bedford, Mk43 0XE www.whitehorsehusbornecrawley.squarespace.com whitehorsehc@gmail.com.

WHO LIKES MODERN ART? Modern Art is routinely puzzling. Weird. Shocking. Incomprehensible – sometimes. But Tate Modern is the most visited art gallery in the UK. What explains this paradox? The Arts Society Woburn Area continues its arts lecture series at the Village Hall in Aspley Guise on Thursday 28th February when art critic and historian Kate Aspinall presents her lecture entitled “The Awkward Bodies of British Modernism”. She will talk about how British 20th century painters have related their own conception of the world to the human form. So, she will be talking about Lucian Freud, David Hockney, Francis Bacon, David Bomberg, his pupil Frank Auerbach, and a stream of others. Through their eyes realism becomes more important than beauty. Indeed, even beautiful people are deliberately distorted. And man’s evil is portrayed through tortured images. As a young soldier in the Great War David Bomberg witnessed his brother and friends killed in the trenches. What he saw there changed his own art forever. This art is not pretty, it’s often challenging, but it’s always fascinating. Later this season, on Thursday 21st March, The Arts Society Woburn Area will be presenting art historian Julia Musgrave on “Caravaggio: Murderer or Genius?”, and on Thursday 25th April “A Decorative Art: the History of Wallpapers”, presented by lecturer and writer Jo Banham. “The Awkward Bodies of British Modernism” starts at 7.30pm. Booking is unnecessary and all are welcome. Cost £7.50. Alternatively, if you would like to join the Woburn Area branch of The Arts Society the membership fee is reduced to £30 from February onwards: please contact Peter Lomax 01908 582313; peter@lomaxnet.com for further information.

Fresh air, friendly, fun – and free!

Bedfordshire Rural Communities Charity is looking for new volunteers to join up at historic Warden Abbey Vineyard, near Old Warden. The secateurs are being sharpened as volunteers at Bedfordshire’s community-run vineyard start the major task of pruning some 4000 vines – and new volunteers are very welcome to join in. Vineyard Manager Jane Markham explained “We start pruning the vines in January and it’s a great way to shake off the cobwebs if you’re feeling a bit jaded after the festive season. It’s also a really good time for new volunteers to join us as you can see how the vineyard develops through the year. Essentially, the vineyard offers a unique way to enjoy the outdoors, get fit, meet new people and relax from the stresses of life, in a beautiful setting. We provide all the training and equipment you need so beginners are very welcome.” The charity has leased the vineyard since 2010 and run it as a “not for profit” community project, offering opportunities for learning, improving physical and mental wellbeing, and reducing isolation. All proceeds from its award winning wines go to keeping the project going. As well as working on the vines, there are a range of other volunteering opportunities on offer, including organising events and activities, working with school and special needs groups, tour guides and marketing. If helping at this unique project appeals, please contact Jane to find out more, on 07981 113714 or info@wardenvineyard.org.uk or check out www.wardenvineyard.org.uk/get-involved

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

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ABOUT BLUE SPEAR...

OUR CLIENTS SAY... Morestaff Recruitment ‘Blue Spear have provided reliable transport solutions for Morestaff over the last 10 years. The team at Blue Spear manage a minibus service for our staff, transporting employees to and from work locations on a daily basis. Blue Spear deliver a fantastic transport package for us, which we are extremely pleased with and would highly recommend to anyone'

John Dearman - Bonds Homes 'We have been using Bobby from Blue Spear Cars for many years, as the service he provides is exceptional and great value. We have and would recommend him to anyone looking for professional taxi service'

TO DISCUSS YOUR TRANSPORT REQUIREMENTS CALL BLUE SPEAR : 01525 839333

Airport Transfers - Events - Special Occasion - Business Travel - Chauffeuring When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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T Butlin Building and Plastering Est 1987

www.timbutlinbuilders.co.uk

Over 30 years in business For your extensions, renovations, alterations, Upvc fascias / soffitts, guttering, block paving and all plastering including artex ceilings and walls plastered back to flat.

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Here we bring you more of your splendid photos of The Fuddler being read all around the world! On the left we have Malcolm at Petra, the ‘hidden city’ carved from rock in Jordan, with his copy of The Fuddler, and below is Steve reading his Fuddler at the Temple Bar pub in Dublin. Many thanks for those and if you are going away don’t forget to pack your Fuddler too! Please send your photos of a Fuddler being read away from home to martin@thefuddler.com

Also offering:

Impressions Female decorators All aspects of painting and decorating. With female finesse to make the most of your home

07944 710179

email:sophiebutlin@hotmail.co.uk

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Page 15

It's that time of year happy couples cheer Because Valentine’s day will soon be here. Boxed chocs special gifts and cards as well All out on display for us to sell. Plus we have some new special wines nice and tasty But please drink sensibly not to hastily. So what else is going on in our store, Well at McColls we offer our customers so much more. With many new lines placed on shelf We have run out of space for any thing else. New pasta and mug soups we now sell Even tinned spaghetti hoops as well lol. Our chilled range has now got bigger And some of the products won't effect your figure. Whole chicken, and cooked chicken thighs, Here at McColls we have many good buys. And I'll also like to mention our newspaper offer Where you get free six week delivery yes that's delivery for free. So to save you going out in the cold and snow And would like papers delivered just call in and let us know... And just before I go We need some new paper boys or girls did you know Ampthill and Maulden we do deliver But you need to wrap up warm or you will definitely a shiver.... MCCOLL’S YOUR LOCAL CONVENIENCE STORE 17 CHURCH STREET AMPTHILL TEL: 01525 404096 OPEN: MON-SAT 6AM TO 8PM SUNDAY 7AM TO 8PM

POTENTIAL DEVELOPMENT LAND WANTED If you have land that you think may be suitable for development for one house or one hundred houses give us a call and we will be pleased to come round and give you our opinion at no charge and without any obligation. It might be the best call you make this year. HUNTERHILL ESTATES Ltd 01234 766271 & 07786 038906 hunterhillestate@btinternet.com

Tel: 01525 403319 email: engineandtender@live.co.uk F: Find us on Facebook

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FOOD SERVICE Lunchtimes Wed - Fri 12 - 2 Evening Wed & Thurs 6 - 7.45

Monday & Tuesday SANDWICHES & TOASTIES Available Come and try The Engine & Tender home cooked meat sandwich on bloomer bread which you can enjoy hot or cold! Served Monday & Tuesday HOT! TASTY! DELICIOUS!

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ARE YOU WORKING FROM HOME?

Why not place an economical ad like this in The Fuddler and let everyone know what you do?

Just email all the details to martin@thefuddler.com

36 Dunstable Street, Ampthill Telephone 01525 634857 3500+ Ales from April 2010 THE PERMANENT BEER FEST SOUTH BEDS CAMRA PUB OF THE YEAR 2014 Russell and the team are now busy planning a whole host of Charity Events to keep you entertained for the forthcoming Spring and Summer!

Keep your eyes peeled for all the details. Ampthill Writers’ Group meet at The Albion, first Wednesday of every Month 8pm You can now see us on Facebook You can’t B&T it!

CAMRA BEDS PUB OF THE YEAR 2013 OUR OTHER PUBS ARE: The Globe, Winfield Street, Dunstable (Bedfordshire Pub of the year 2010) - Tel: 01582 512300 The Wellington Arms, Wellington Street, Bedford (North Beds Pub of the year 2010) - Tel: 01234 308033 The Elm Tree, Orchard Street, Cambridge - Tel: 01223 502632 The Brewery Tap, North Bridge Street, Shefford Tel: 01462 628448

www.banksandtaylor.com

With Henrietta Wainsworth.

History never fails to surprise or teach. Did you know that Queen Victoria had a secret sister? No, neither did I and so here are a few facts about that shadowy historical figure. - Technically a half sister, Princess Feodora was born in Germany to HRH the Duchess of Kent (Victoria’s mother) from her first marriage to His Serene Highness Prince Emich Charles of Leiningen. - When her mother married HRH the Duke of Kent, Feodora was bought to England to live in Kensington Palace and it was here in May 1819 when she was 11 years old that Victoria was born. - Feodora had many admirers. Augustus d’Este (son of Victoria uncle HRH the Duke of Sussex); an Irish furrier and none other than King George 1V himself. All were considered unsuitable by her mother so the Princess was shipped back to Germany where her grandmother found her a suitable suitor in Prince Ernest of HohenloheLangenburg whom she married in February 1837 and so began a very happy married relationship which produced six children. - Princess Feodora was happy to live in Victoria’s shadow, playing a supporting role so as not to upset the status quo. - The sisters were very close and from the moment Feodora returned to Germany in 1828 they corresponded regularly.

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

- Feodora became a mentor to Victoria. In Victoria’s early year s Feodora influenced Victoria on her behaviours and sense of duty but later, when Victoria became Queen and married, she counselled her on ‘matters of matrimony and motherhood’ - Prince Albert it seems was a little jealous of the sisterly relationship and did his best to limit their meetings when he and Victoria visited Germany. - Princess Feodora was present on the important days of Victoria’s life including her coronation. She was also a great comfort to Victoria on the death of Prince Albert. Maybe that was because she had an affinity due to the fact that Prince Ernest had died the year before Prince Albert. - Queen Victoria visited Princess Feodora in Baden shortly before Feodora’s death in September 1872. This is a very short summary of Princess Fedora’s life but as this May is the bicentenary of Queen Victoria’s birth, perhaps the sister who seems to have been airbrushed from the public stage, (perhaps due to her embarrassing social and political standings of the times,) should herself be honoured. She was after all, the sister so ‘dearly loved and respected’ by our revered matriarchal monarch, Queen Victoria. © HW. (ref: The Lady 18-31 January 2019)

©Henrietta Wainsworth.

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GOLD AWARD WINNERS

New members wanted for Ampthill & District Probus Club (for retired professional business people aiming to give their grey matter a work out). Reward - good company and enjoyment with like minded ‘young at heart ‘ professionals. Contact Alan on 01234 961786 for the low down or view our website on www.ampthillprobus.co.uk. Ampthill Town CC will in the summer of 2019 be fielding 4 senior elevens on Saturdays & 3 on Sundays. On Saturday the first & second elevens will compete in the Saracens Hertfordshire League with the third eleven taking part in the more local Four Counties League Sunday all three elevens will take part in the Bedfordshire County League We also have a Mid-Week XI entering the Cup Competitions as organised by Beds Cricket Ltd & East Beds Charity Shield (In 2018 we won the Heritage Cup organised by the East Beds Shield). Indoor nets are on Sunday evenings starting on 10th February (for nine weeks) between 5pm & 7pm at Flitwick Leisure Centre. (Players of all abilities welcome) Practice during the season will take place on Wednesday nights on our Park ground More details from Jeremy Degnan 07958 524613 jeremy.degnan@tui.co.uk or William Sneath 07884 070103 willsneath@hotmail.com We shall be running youth teams at Under 9, 11, & 13 (In 2018 our Under 13s were the Bedfordshire Southern Champions). To join this popular section of the club please contact Dave Bradley on 07468 912586 dave.bradley@hotmail.co.uk We will be hosting Bedfordshire CCC vs. Oxfordshire CCC on Sunday 12th May with an 11 am start for a 50 over a side game in the Minor County Knock Out

2016/17 Best UK Pizza Restaurant

FINALISTS Best Team 2017 Pasta Chef 2017 2018 Pizza Chef 2018

VALENTINE’S DAY Have you booked your romantic meal yet? Please see our Facebook page or ring Michael on 01525 404666 for details OPENING TIMES: Monday evening 6.00 Ͳ 9.00 Tuesday to Friday lunchtime 12.00 Ͳ 2.00 Tuesday to Thursday evening 6.00 Ͳ 10.00 Friday and Saturday evening 6.00 Ͳ 11.00 www.donatellospizzeria.co.uk

91, Dunstable Street Ampthill Tel: (01525) 404666 Free parking available

RECRUITMENT OPEN EVENING Š—”•†ƒ› ͚–Š ƒ”…Š ʹͲͳ͝ ƒˆƒ”‹ ‘†‰‡ǥ ‘„—”Â? ƒˆƒ”‹ ƒ”Â?ÇĄ ͳ͚ Íť Drop-In „‡–™‡‡Â? 5pm and 7pm! Woburn Safari Park Šƒ• ƒÂ? ‡š…‹–‹Â?‰ ƒ””ƒ› ‘ˆ •‡ƒ•‘Â?ƒŽ ƒÂ?† ’‡”Â?ƒÂ?‡Â?– ‘’’‘”–—Â?‹–‹‡• ƒ˜ƒ‹Žƒ„Ž‡ ™‹–Š‹Â? –Š‡ ˆ‘ŽŽ‘™‹Â?‰ ÂƒÂ”Â‡ÂƒÂ•ÇŁ Catering Leisure -Attractions Retail Go Ape ‡ ƒ”‡ Ž‘‘Â?‹Â?‰ ˆ‘” ’‡‘’Ž‡ ™Š‘ …ƒÂ? †‡Â?‘Â?•–”ƒ–‡ ‹Â?–‡‰”‹–›ǥ ™Š‘ …‘Â?–‹Â?—ƒŽŽ› •–”‹˜‡ ˆ‘” ‡š…‡ŽŽ‡Â?…‡ǥ Šƒ˜‡ ƒ ’ƒ••‹‘Â? ˆ‘” †‡Ž‹˜‡”‹Â?‰ ƒÂ? ‡š…‡’–‹‘Â?ƒŽ …—•–‘Â?‡” ‡š’‡”‹‡Â?…‡ ƒÂ?† ˜ƒŽ—‡ ƒ •‡Â?•‡ ‘ˆ …‘Â?Â?—Â?‹–›Ǥ

ˆ ›‘— ƒ”‡ Ž‘‘Â?‹Â?‰ ˆ‘” ƒ Â?‡™ …ŠƒŽŽ‡Â?‰‡ǥ ™Š› Â?‘– …‘Â?‡ ƒŽ‘Â?‰ ƒÂ?† •‡‡ —•Ǎ Ž‡ƒ•‡ —•‡ –Š‡ Husborne Crawley Entrance ƒÂ?† ˆ‘ŽŽ‘™ –Š‡ ›‡ŽŽ‘™ •‹‰Â?• –‘ ÇŽ ƒˆƒ”‹ ‘†‰‡ǯǤ ‡ Ž‘‘Â? ˆ‘”™ƒ”† –‘ •‡‡‹Â?‰ ›‘— –Š‡”‡Ǩ Ž‡ƒ•‡ Â?‘–‡ǥ ™‡ ™‹ŽŽ Â?‘– „‡ ”‡…”—‹–‹Â?‰ ˆ‘” ƒÂ?‹Â?ÂƒÂŽÇŚÂ”Â‡ÂŽÂƒÂ–Â‡Â† ”‘Ž‡• ƒ– –Š‹• ‡˜‡Â?–Ǥ ‘” Â?‘”‡ ‹Â?ˆ‘”Â?ƒ–‹‘Â?ÇĄ †‡–ƒ‹Ž• ‘ˆ ‘—” ‡š…‹–‹Â?‰ „‡Â?‡ˆ‹–• ƒÂ?† ƒ Ž‹•– ‘ˆ ‘—” …—””‡Â?– ˜ƒ…ƒÂ?…‹‡•ǥ ’Ž‡ƒ•‡ Â˜Â‹Â•Â‹Â–ÇŁ ™™™Ǥ™‘„—”Â?Ǥ…‘Ǥ—Â? ƒÂ?† …Ž‹…Â? ÇŽ ƒ”‡‡”•ǯǤ We welcome all applicants, but due to H&S and/or legal restrictions, you must be 18+ to work in our Go Ape, Leisure or Bar based positions.

When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

Page 18

If you are quick you could book an advert like this in our next edition!

Pat Eldin

Just ring Martin on

Carpentry, Joinery and Building Services

07530 869 365 or email

07768 008951

martin@thefuddler.com

01462 812242

McMammoth Man's Scottish Gamekeeper's Pie (A Burns Night Alternative) Serves 2-3 Tailor this mash-topped stew to suit whatever game is in season - add more matured meat if you like a strong game flavour. You will need: 25 g butter 1 tbsp olive oil 1 onion, chopped 1 carrot, chopped 350 g mixed game meat (partridge, pigeon, pheasant, rabbit and hare all work well), deboned and cut into small chunks 150 g venison sausages (3 or 4 sausages), removed from their skins 1 tbsp plain flour 1 tbsp tomato purée

1 tbsp Worcestershire sauce 2 bay leaves 2 tbsp thyme leaf, chopped 75 ml red wine 250 ml chicken or beef stock 200 g potatoes, peeled and cut in pieces 300 g mixed root vegetables (parsnips, swede, turnips or celeriac), peeled and cut into chunks And here’s what you do: Heat half the butter and the oil in a large pan, add the onion and carrot, and cook for about 10 minutes until soft. Add the game and sausage meat to the pan. Turn up the heat, squash the meat with the back of your spoon to break it up, and cook for a further 10 minutes until nicely browned. Stir the flour and tomato purée into the meat, cook for approx 1 min, then add the

Electrical Services Contractor Commercial / Light industrial Sockets Switches Lighting, Extractor fans Electric blinds Installation and repair. PAT testing

Ampthill and surrounding area. Trading for 30 years Discount for Fuddler readers with this ad

pateldinbarbel@hotmail.co.uk wine, stock, sauce, bay leaves and 2 thirds of the thyme. Bring to a simmer, reduce the heat, cover with a lid and cook for 1 hr. Remove the lid and cook for another 15 minutes to allow the meat to get tender and the sauce has thickened. Put the potatoes and vegetables in a large pan, cover with water, bring to the boil and cook for 20 minutes until really tender. Drain, leave to steam for another 5 minutes, then mash with seasoning, milk and the remaining butter. Heat oven to 220C/200C fan/ gas 7. Tip the meat into an ovenproof dish and spoon on the mash. Sprinkle with the remaining thyme and bake for 45 minutes until the top is golden and the sauce is bubbling.

Have a go at this but don’t use a calculator. Take 1000 and add 40. Add another 1000, plus 30. Add 1000 again and then add 20. Plus a further 1000, plus 10. What’s your answer? 5,000? See below. Here’s a little more whimsy from one of our readers: My boss sacked me because of my long-jump obsession. I came out of his office and cleared my desk. Oh Dear! But thanks!

Kindly sent to us by a reader: ‘You are my one and only’ Valentine cards now for sale 1 for £1.00, 4 for £3.00 Thanks again !

T.H.E. BEST BUTCHERS

* INTERESTING RANGE OF SPECIALITY SAUSAGES

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Unit 5, Lower Rectory Farm, Great Brickhill, Milton Keynes, Bucks MK17 9AF

Call Martin 07449 105386 4,100

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

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NEWPAPER DELIVERERS REQUIRED IN THE AMPTHILL/MAULDEN AREA

FARMERS MARKET

Need to be 13 years old or above. For more information please contact

The Farmers Market in Woburn is held on the third Sunday of every month from 10.00 - 2.00 at The Pitchings in the village.

McColl’s Convenience Store 17 Church Street, Ampthill 01525 404096

Don’t forget The Charter Market in Ampthill every Thursday and Flitwick Market on Fridays!

Bringing Home In our family it is a custom for animals and birds just suddenly to appear, quickly becoming part of the family. A sad, sob story soon opened the door, everyone being guilty of not being able to say no. No one ever said what have you done that for, who was going to provide the time to feed another newcomer. Young Andrew, bringing home a pair of Muscovy ducks, note a pair, in his pockets, while riding his bike from Pulloxhill. They too needed a home. Quickly adjusting to life with, the

hens, rabbits, dogs and cats, and soon the Bantam hen Daisy May taught them how to get tasty treats in the house. Muscovy Ducks are quite large, very strong, in body, fearless. These two also liked adventures. Let out first thing to graze and swim and socialise with the other animals. As they grew, the handsome pair soon had young, now a family of their own. Everyone was used to seeing them wandering about up and down the yard. The lorry drivers who came down to the stores, shared their sandwiches. However ever protective, to the New young

ones the drake began to chase the drivers, back into the lorry cab. Nipping their legs. The dog, his job to keep an eye on things, just let the Muscovy Drake get on with it. Will still get fed if all the dog did was to lay in the Sun. In the end the drake was confined to barracks while a lorry unloaded. Whether it was revenge for this temporary imprisonment he and his mate decided that a good wiz would be flying to the neighbour’s bungalow roof, eyeing up the prize fish in the pond, diving, swimming and whatever ducks enjoy, passing the

time. Nothing against their natural custom. A quick wing trim solved the problem, short term anyway, they do grow back quickly. The next adventure began when a workman, at another neighbour’s house, left his back doors open to his van. He apparently nearly had a heart attack when the pair flew out over his head to escape. What with ducks thinking they are dogs, or fishermen, a rabbit convinced it too is a dog, why do people still asked for us to take in yet another creature. Mind you Nature Knows Best! D.O.T

EN E S V! T S A N O

THIS MONTH’S CHESS PUZZLE Here’s another puzzle for you. It’s white to play and mate is achieved in two moves. If you enjoy our monthly chess puzzles why not pop in and have a beer and maybe challenge us?!

‘TOAD IN THE HOLE’ PLAYERS WANTED! If you would like to join our new league to play in this good old fashioned English bar game please come in and see Richard. It’s all starting soon. ‘Foozball’ also played here! Come and see!

SUNDAY LUNCHTIME NIBBLES You are invited to enjoy your Sunday lunchtime drink with more bar snacks than you could shake a stick at, and all with Richard’s compliments!

Saturday 2nd March Live music from 7pm with

ELECTRIC UKES Why not come along, blow away those winter blues and have a boogie! Don’t miss it!

SIX NATIONS RUGBY Don’t miss a match - we will be showing all games, so we would be pleased to see you! WEDNESDAY QUIZ FROM 8.00pm February 13th - Guest Landlord’s quiz. Plus, over the month, regular quizmasters - JVP, H & Miri and Malcolm. Why not call in one Wednesday night and join in? There’s no charge and we can probably even find you a pencil! Everyone welcome. If you would like to be a quizmaster please speak to Richard and add your name to the rota!

When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

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Your advertisement in The Fuddler is only a click away! If you have decided that you too would like an advert in The Fuddler all you have to do to book your space is to send an email over to martin@thefuddler.com for all the details

With The Imp

With James Shue Here’s a handy exercise that you will find a useful start on that all important road to fitness and well being. The exercise is designed to develop muscle strength in the arms and shoulders. Stand on a comfortable surface where you have plenty of room around you. With a 2lb potato bag in each hand, extend your arms outwards from your body and hold them there for as

long as you can. Ideally try for a full minute. Repeat the exercise daily and you should find that you can hold the position a little longer. After a week or so move up to a 5 lb potato bag and then later even a 25 lb potato bag. Try each time to hold the bags for a full minute. Once you are feeling confident and comfortable try putting a potato in each bag.

Very many congratulations to Rosie and Ben !!

Hello everybody! I am an actress who plays a lead role in a long running and highly popular US police and legal drama series in which my character does a tremendous amount of meaningful whispering! (And that’s a clue!) Answer at the foot of the page.

ote: n y r a i D

y i s at a D s ’ r e et Moth g r o f t ’ n Do sure e k a M ! of March d n e e h t ement s i t r e v d k your a o o b u o y uddler! F e h T n i

Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

Mariska Hargitay - Law & Order SVU

1. ‘My favourite flavour of cake is more’ 2. ‘It was imagination of the mind.’ 3. ‘I get my takeaways delivered by Buckaroo.’ 4. ‘Who invented the Hammerhead shark?’ 5. ‘I prefer my kale with a silent k.’ 6. ‘Those facts were not true.’ 7. ‘It came up 'No caller ID' So I knew who it was.’ 8. ‘Do you eat greens?’ ‘Yes. Carrots, onions and mushrooms.’ 9. ‘I’ve seen him by sight.’ Thanks again Imp

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Ben Keenan With Lauren Louella Boughalls Greetings to everyone and once again a big welcome to another picture challenge. Thanks to everyone who had a go at last month’s poser and congratulations to Brian, David and everyone else who correctly identified last month’s photograph as the Mausoleum at Maulden Church and once again many thanks to the reader who sent us the photograph.

Now for this month once again, one of our readers has been out and about in the town and villages in Fuddlerland and has taken this interesting photograph of an old water pump which is situated in one of the villages. He has very kindly sent it to us so we can share it with you. And, many thanks. But do you recognise it and where it might be? If you think you know drop us an email to martin@thefuddler.com Answer next month!

HUMAN GIVENS THERAPIST MHGI. HG Dip. (Dist) PSA. Public Standards Authority Accredited Register

The world of counselling/psychotherapy is a very different place to what it was even ten years ago! Neurological science has provided insights that when combined with the best of other approaches provides a fast and effective solution focused therapy (SFBT) that is embodied in Human Givens. Treatment does not just mean sitting and endlessly talking, it is also about effectively understanding the issues and providing lasting realistic change. Therapy thoughts Depression, Anxiety, or Stress are often written about as definable conditions with neat pathologies to describe what they are. I struggle with this perspective, where does depression end and Anxiety begin? Where is the border between suffering from stress and depression? My experience from working with clients is that from a distance you can see a recognisable condition but when you start to work with a client the truth is that they are all experiencing these conditions in varying ways because of differing circumstances. However these conditions are looked at the truth is that for most people they are packed down compressed thinking brought about by barriers to their innate needs being met. This is how the Human Given's approach begins the path to fast safe recovery.

Ben Keenan Ͳ 07860 195303 or email: therapyinbedforshire@outlook.com www.therapyinbedfordshire.co.uk Advert funded by BKPH Ltd

Maulden Garage Ltd FOR ALL YOUR VEHICLE NEEDS Modern Classic or Vintage Repairs, Servicing, Breakdowns, Fabrication, Tyres, Exhausts Classic Rally Car Preparation and on event service support Unit 10 Woodside Clophill Road Maulden Beds MK45 2AE www.mauldengarage.co.uk mauldengarage@btconnect.com

01525 862877 Free local delivery and collection service

When responding to an advert please say you found it in The Fuddler!

Page 22

Here we delve more into the whimsical, wacky and interesting world of Montgolfier:

In 1940 I went to see the film ‘The Way Ahead’ at a large country house where troops were stationed. Some of the Land Girls from the Agricultural college came too. David Niven was in the film. He was also in the audience with us dressed in his Army uniform. Did you know that all tree roots are in the top 1ft of soil and if you pile a couple of feet more soil over them you can kill the tree. If your name was Rhodes and you joined the army you would become Private Rhodes. I live and learn. I found out that young Peregrine Falcons are called Eyasses. Did you know that? It is impossible to fold a piece of paper in half more than eight times even if it is the size of a football field. All stations differ. I was driven by a friend to a North Scottish station and we stop with the front bumper about five feet from the edge of the platform. We sit and wait, then I get out and onto the train with no ticket. The train attendant then comes round and you get your ticket. Moments later the tea trolley comes round and you get your drinl and a snack. You then enjoy the best train ride along the coast and round the lochs for just over 4 hours before arriving down in Inverness. Super! Statement on TV ad: These are real people not actors. So does that mean that actors are not real people? Always remember that a verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it is printed on.

Flittabus needs YOU ! Volunteer drivers wanted!

Driving a Flittabus can be fun; it’s also very worthwhile.

We have 3 buses and 11 routes, driven (and managed) by over 30 men and women volunteers, providing scheduled services around Central Bedfordshire. ANYONE can use Flittabus but most of all we help many elderly people to remain independent.

If you can spare just one or two half days a month we would like to hear from you. Why not come for a trial drive & see if you like it?

Full support & training will be provided. To learn more please contact Chris Tarmu 01525 861940.

Note: New drivers do need to be under the age of 67

Help line for bus information 07960 388 111 or see www.flittabus.co.uk Don’t forget - if you have missed an issue - you can catch up at www.thefuddler.com

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If you have decided that you would like an advertisement in The Fuddler please ring Martin on 07530 869 365 or if you prefer please send an email to martin@thefuddler.com for details.

Episode 70 ........ First Catch Your Haggis! By the time you read my column this month Burns Night will have been and gone, however, I will offer here a witty ditty of how one can prepare for the next time you feel like cooking haggis. I personally love haggis with neeps (mashed swede) and tatties (mashed potatoes) any time of the year:- for a New Year or Burns Night alternative see my Scottish cousin's recipe on page 18 of this issue. My cousin always cooks haggis the traditional way, and sometimes it takes him hours of stalking these strange little beasties up in the Highlands. Through the heather, through the glen. Go the Highland hunting men. Wrapped up warm in kilts 'gainst winter cold. Only the bravest, and the bold. For who knows where the Haggis hides. Amidst these frozen mountain sides. In the loch with neeps and tatties? Or lurking with the sheep and ratties. They seek him here, they seek him there. But none can find the Haggis' lair. This chieftain of the pudding race' is lying low without a trace. Only the piper and 'Selkirk Grace' can summon Haggis to this place. But then with toasts, all passed around, we see the Haggis, firm and round. The humble Haggis, cooked and dressed. Is here to feed men truly blessed.

So let this gathering on Burns Day, eat and drink, laugh and play. Then, for this Chief of Scottish rhyme, lets sing Burns' song of Auld Lang Syne! By Brenda Williams According to sources, the wild haggis's left and right legs are of different lengths allowing the beastie to run quickly around the steep mountains and hillsides which make up its natural habitat, but only in one direction. It is further claimed that there are two varieties of haggis, one with longer left legs and the other with longer right legs. The former variety can run clockwise around a mountain (as seen from above) while the latter can run anticlockwise. The two varieties coexist peacefully but are unable to interbreed in the wild because as the male of one variety becomes amorous with a female of the other, he must turn to face in the same direction causing him to lose his balance. As a result of this difficulty, differences in leg length among the haggis population are accentuated. The notion of the wild haggis is widely believed, though not always including the idea of mismatched legs. "Some hae meat and canna eat, and some wad eat that want it. But we hae meat and we can eat, sae let the Lord be Thankit!" The Selkirk Grace Robert Burns

FEBRUARY 2019 Volunteer Task - Millennium Country Park Thursday 7 February 9.30am to 3.30pm stephen.gascoyne@marstonvale.org or 01234 762610. Volunteer Task - Millennium Country Park Sunday 10 Februaury 10am to 3.30pm anna.charles@marstonvale.org or 01234 76261 Public Tree Planting Sunday 10 February 11am to 3pm Free turn-up-and-go shuttle bus from Forest Centre. 01234 767037 or www.marstonvale.org/events Theatre of Widdershins presents... 'Snow White, Rose Red, Bear Brown' Wednesday 13 February 4.30pm to 6pm Booking essential: 01234 767037 or www.marstonvale.org/events Family Fun in the Woods Thursday 14 February Sessions 10am to Midday, 1.30pm to 3.30pm Booking essential: 01234 767037 or www.marstonvale.org/events The Greatest Showman Tribute - Family Show Saturday 16 February 2pm to 2.45pm Booking essential: 01234 767037 or www.marstonvale.org/events Learning Lunchtime Monday 18 February 11am to Noon Bedfordshire's Secret War 01234 767037 or www.marstonvale.org/events Volunteer Task - Millennium Country Park Thursday 21 February 9.30am to 3.30pm stephen.gascoyne@marstonvale.org or 01234 762610 Wedding Fair Thursday 21 February 6.30pm to 9pm Free - Pre-book to receive goodie bag: 01234 767037 or www.marstonvale.org/events Learning Lunchtime Monday 25 February 11am to Noon The Exmoor Ponies of the Park 01234 767037 or www.marstonvale.org/events Volunteer Task - Grange Estate Tuesday 26 February 10am to 3.30pm darren.woodward@marstonvale.org or 01234 762603. For a full list of events - see www.marstonvale.org/events

Short led walks, all welcome. Need to get more active? This could be just the thing for you. Walks last about an hour and a quarter (some hills). Walk at your own pace in a friendly group. It’s all free - just turn up. Next walks - all start at 10.00am: 8th February 22nd February 8th March

Flitvale Garden Centre, Westoning Ampthill Park, west car park The Compasses PH, Greenfield

For further information please contact: Lynda on 01234 740788 or at olivetree47@googlemail.com Or Laurie on 01525 403950 or at lalowe@btinternet.com or see http://ampthillhealthwalks.blogspot.co.uk

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