Misc.04.08.2021

The Miscellany News

Vassar College’s student newspaper of record since 1866

April 8, 2021

miscellanynews.org

Volume 155 | Issue 6

Prison divestment group presses Vassar admin VC athletics' strange F season Alex Wilson

Assistant News Editor

ollowing months of research and collaboration, the Vassar College Prison Divestment Campaign—a partnership between the Black Students’ Union, Gradient (a men of color group on campus) and the Vassar Prison Initiative—released a final statement and petition last week outlining their demands for the college’s divestment from the prison industrial complex (PIC).

The statement, which organizers said was a product of collective effort between at least a dozen people and involved the voices of many more students and faculty, outlined a score of ways that the college has involved itself with the PIC. This includes paying $6 million annually to Vassar’s food service provider Bon Appetit’s parent company, Compass Group, which provides food services to prisons, to asking professional and student applicants about their histories of felony convictions—a practice that the Vassar campaign says other institutions, including Duke University and the SUNY & the University of California systems, have

Inside this issue

Jackie Malloy

Assistant Sports Editor

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The Prison Divestment Campaign's statement details the College's alleged involvement in the prison industrial complex.

Taylor Stewart/The Miscellany News. banned.

Campaign organizers Xade Wharton-Ali ’22, Chelsea Quayenortey ’22, Sulekh Fernando-Peiris ’22 and Jhujhar Sarna ’22 expressed an understanding that their holistic, diverse set of demands reflects the reality of the PIC’s far reaching, deeply-rooted consequences, especially for people of color.

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garding financial divestment, community relations and diversified hiring, the campaign also admonished the college’s lack of transparency in these matters. “Vassar needs to come forth and let us know what we’re invested in,” said Wharton-Ali. “We think that’s really important because at the end See Prison on page 4

Vaccine hotline helps Poughkeepsie community Mahlia Neely

Recently the Bridge for Laboratory Sciences has been ARTS transformed into a majestic crochet coral reef.

Read more on this work of art, math and environmentalism.

The campaign’s demands include divestment from private prisons and companies benefitting from prison labor, increasing student voice in monetary decision-making and reinvestment in companies that hire formerly incarcerated people and local programs benefiting minority communities.

Besides specific demands re-

escheduled games. No spectators. Gameday testing. Socially distanced benches. Masks on.

No hand shakes. No celebrations.

When Vassar announced that spring athletes would be allowed to compete for the upcoming season, no one knew exactly what competition would entail. Now, after two weeks of games (the first that any Vassar team has seen in a year), it seems we still don’t know exactly what a season looks like in the time of COVID-19. From other teams’ viral concerns leading to time changes for testing and matchups at the last minute, to not knowing when (or how) to celebrate after scoring, competition still remains a big question mark for Brewer squads. Planning weeks in advance is a thing of the past. Yet, despite these new variables and unknowns they face each day, Vassar athletes have found success in returning See Sports on page 13

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Guest Reporter

n April 6, 2021, everyone over the age of 16 became eligible to receive a COVID-19 vaccination in New York State.

However, the federal supply of vaccines to New York has been unable to keep up with the growing number of eligible residents, resulting in many people in Poughkeepsie—includ-

ing vulnerable members of the population such as older adults and immunocompromised residents—having difficulty in booking a vaccination appointment.

To combat this, some members of the Vassar community have created the Vassar vaccine hotline, which helps Poughkeepsie residents secure an elusive vaccination appointment.

Eleanor Carter ’22, one of

the head organizers of the hotline’s volunteer team, credited her mother for the idea to start a Vassar-centered hotline.

Carter said, “[My mom] kept sending me articles about other students and young people who were volunteering to help residents sign up for vaccines and asked if Vassar was doing anything like that.” When she realized that there was no such

program at Vassar, Carter spoke with History professor Rebecca Edwards who is also a Dutchess County Legislator and leader of the Democratic Caucus. Prior to the hotline, Carter had done other constituent service projects with Edwards this semester through a community-engaged learning credit, and, after they sorted out the logistics, the VasSee Vaccine on page 7

Class of ’25 most competitive year yet for applicants Lucille Brewster

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Wondering what happend to the Rabid Coyote Husbandry Club HUMOR and the Random Wild Mushroom Tasting Club? Find out here.

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Try your luck at the latest editions of the Miscellany CROSSWORD News Crossword: "Physique Tune-up" and "Google Easter Eggs."

News Editor

assar students have had a tough year, and so have many prospective students who hoped for a spot in the college’s Class of 2025. On March 31, Vassar notified those in the regular decision round of their admission status. For administrators and students alike, COVID-19 triggered an especially competitive and grueling year of the college admissions process.

According to Dean of Admissions and Financial Services Sonya Smith, Vassar received 10,884 firstyear applications this year, a record high number and a 25 percent increase from last year. The admission rate this year was 19 percent, down from 24 percent last year.

Smith explained the school won’t know how their yield rate shifted until students accept their offers.

Competitive colleges all over the country reported a similar increase in applications this application cycle. According to the Common App, the nation’s most selective

four-year private and public institutions saw an average increase of 17 percent this year. Other liberal arts colleges like Haverford and Swarthmore saw jumps in applications of 16 percent and 12 percent, respectively.

Selective institutions saw their applications spike during the pandemic because most schools, including Vassar, went standardized test optional, meaning students could choose whether to submit ACT or SAT scores. This was meant to accommodate interruptions in local testing and grading policies for high school students due to the pandemic. Without having to submit test scores, many students widened their college search.

While top-ranked schools saw their admissions pool increase, less competitive institutions saw a devastating drop in admissions amid already mounting financial problems. The State University of New York (SUNY), which is the largest public school system in the

country, saw admissions fall by 14 percent this year.

Admissions officers across the country expressed concern about how to evaluate an increased pool of applicants, all while considering the conditions of the pandemic and the absence of test scores—and, in many cases, gaps in junior year transcripts and a lack of available extracurriculars during the pandemic. “We've always had a holistic application review process and that did not change,” commented Smith. “We know many students didn't have access to the same opportunities that they have had in the past, many had to care for others or had their own challenges, and many schools temporarily changed their grading policies,” she explained.

Smith was a signatory on a statement released by the Making Caring Common Project organized by the Harvard Graduate School of Education, which was directed towards high school students and outlined how admissions officers

would take the pandemic into account when evaluating applicants.

“We are keenly aware that students across the country and the world are experiencing many uncertainties and challenges. We primarily wish to underscore our commitment to equity and to encourage in students self-care, balance, meaningful learning, and care for others,” the statement reads. The document also explains that schools will evaluate transcripts, extracurriculars and test scores in the context of the pandemic.

Some shifts in admissions policy may become permanent. Many schools have announced they will become completely test optional.

Vassar has extended the policy for the next two admissions years, continuing until the 2022/23 admissions cycle.

Even with the uncertainty of next fall, students are excited to begin their time on Vassar’s campus.

Vassar posted a welcome message to new students, who expressed enthusiasm in the comments.

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April 8, 2021

THE MISCELLANY NEWS Ted Chmyz Taylor Stewart Tiana Headley Dean Kopitsky Olivia Watson CONTRIBUTING EDITORS Aena Khan Jessica Moss Holly Schulman Abby Tarwater NEWS EDITORS Lucille Brewster Annabelle Wang ASSISTANT NEWS EDITORS Sara Lawler Alex Wilson FEATURES EDITOR Janet Song OPINIONS EDITOR Sawyer Bush ARTS EDITORS Nina Ajemian Leila Raines HUMOR EDITOR Isabella Migani ASSISTANT HUMOR EDITOR Madi Donat SPORTS EDITOR Alex Eisert ASSISTANT SPORTS EDITOR Jackie Molloy SOCIAL MEDIA EDITOR Natalie Bober ASSISTANT SOCIAL MEDIA Alison Carranza ASSISTANT PHOTO EDITORS Sherry Liao Grace Rousell COPY EDITORS Jacqueline Gill Phoebe Jacoby Caitlin Patterson GRAPHICS EDITOR Juliette Pope AUDIO EDITOR Alex Barnard ASSISTANT AUDIO EDITOR Mrin Somani LIVE EVENTS CHAIRPERSON Ben Scharf BUSINESS MANAGER Emma Tanner ASSISTANT BUSINESS MANAGER Logan Hyde WEBMASTER Chloe Gjoka VIDEO PRODUCTION MANAGER Ian Herz EDITOR-IN-CHIEF MANAGING EDITOR SENIOR EDITORS

REPORTER COLUMNISTS

GRAPHIC DESIGNER COPY STAFF

CROSSWORD

Monika Sweeney Francisco Andrade Karina Burnett Madison Caress Doug Cobb Johnathan Dean Rohan Dutta Ben Fikhman Nicholas Gorman Helen Johnson Xin Rui Ong Danielle Recco Massimo Tarridas Sandro Luis Lorenzo Arlene Chen Katie Gebbia Glenna Gomez Jason Han Sophia Jahadhmy Tori Lubin Bryn Marling Claire Miller Sashinka Poor Melissa Roybal Mia Stein Greg Calidonna Reese Collins Ian Rosevear

CORRECTION POLICY The Miscellany News will only accept corrections for any misquotes, misrepresentations or factual errors for an article within the semester it is printed.

The Miscellany News is not responsible for the views presented within its Opinions pages. Staff editorials are the only articles that reflect the opinion of a two-thirds majority of the Editorial Board.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

April 8, 2021

NEWS

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Poughkeepsie Common Council approves police reform plan Dean Kopitsky Senior Editor

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lmost one year ago, in June, public pressure following the killings of Ahmaud Arbery, George Floyd, Breonna Taylor and others at the hands of police compelled New York Governor Andrew Cuomo to sign Executive Order 203. The order mandated all New York police departments to conduct a review of their practices and to draft and pass reforms

by April 1, 2021, or lose state and even federal funding. On March 29, the Poughkeepsie Common Council responded to the order, voting to affirm the Police Reform and Modernization Collaborative. The collaborative was proposed by Police Chief Thomas Pape and Mayor Rolison, and its creation lasted months with input from the Common Council, the CPPD, community stakeholders and the city’s Procedural Justice Committee. The plan is a catalogue of recommended commitments and changes to law enforcement in the city of Poughkeepsie.

Six years ago, Natasha Cherry, Council representative for the Sixth Ward, arrived to the Common Council with a goal in mind: “One of the things that was important to me, in regards to police reform, was the relationships in the Black community with the police department,” she said in a phone interview with the Miscellany News. Just after arriving in office she began to meet with Pape and Rolison to express her concerns. While they both committed to help, progress was slow. “The mayor was the most colorblind person I met ever,” said Cherry, letting out a laugh in the March 29th meeting, “when I used to tell him about some of the issues in the Black community...he couldn’t believe it.” Since then, internal collaboration towards reform has grown alongside public demand for change.

Earlier this year, local group Poughkeepsie Community Action Collaborative (PCAC) compiled a report of what it claimed was a record of overpolicing by the CPPD. Using court documents and the FBI’s Crime Data Explorer it found that out of the 1,409 arrests conducted annually by the CPPD between 2014 and 2019, only 821 average conformed to Uniform Crime Reporting Handbook standards. The PCAC also found that as the Poughkeepsie crime rate ticked down, the arrest rate did not. Using UCR figures, which were limited to Black and white demographics, the PCAC report found Black people were 53 percent more likely to be arrested for drug abuse violations, 42 percent more likely to be arrested for all other non-traffic violations and 55 percent more likely to be arrested for disorderly conduct. Black people were also three times more likely to be arrested for maurijuana possession. Using further statistical analyses, PCAC claims that the amounts to “hardcore discrimination.” The CPPD has claimed that it has no further demographic data on those figures. There is, however, an ongoing lawsuit against the city which PCAC believes will uncover that information.

To Brian Robinson, a member of End the New Jim Crow Action Network (ENJAN) and PCAC, good faith collaboration from the police department throughout the process was dubious. “It's like hiring a consultant to come into a company to improve your sales,” said Robinson, “They say, ‘Okay, let me see your sales figures,’ and the response is, ‘We're not letting you see the sales figures. Well, then how are we supposed to improve your sales figures if we don't know what they are?’” Police Chief Pape and Police Captain Wilson did not respond to requests for comment on the PCAC report or the reform collaborative.

Councilmember Yvonne Flowers, who represents the 5th ward, said the Procedural Justice Committee had already submitted their recommendations to the city and the CPPD by the time the PCAC report was published.

She added that once the committee and the Common Council have a chance to vet the numbers, they will begin taking the report into consideration on future reforms.

Beginning in 2017, Poughkeepsie activists and organizations called for the Right to Know Act, which now compels officers to identify themselves upon interacting with the public, to state the reason for the encounter and provide their business card. That bill passed unanimously in July 2020, just a few weeks after Order 203.

That same year, activists supported the formation of a civilian review board (CRB).

The legislation, sponsored by councilmember Evan Menist, would appoint an oversight structure separate from the CPPD’s own review process. The CRB would receive and review complaints brought against the police department among other roles yet to be determined. Supporters of the legislation said the civilian review board would create common-sense transparency between the City of Poughkeepsie Police and its majority Black and brown population.

A citywide 2019 poll administered by the city and Marist College found a considerable level of concern about police accountability among the community and city residents. A total of 389 surveys returned for a response rate of 10.24 percent. One question was: “How strongly do you agree that the police department holds officers accountable for wrong or inappropriate conduct in the community?” Just 42 percent of respondents agreed or strongly agreed that the department held officers accountable. Only 46 percent replied that they agreed or strongly agreed that the police are responsive to community concerns.

Despite some community members’ support, there was well-publicized opposition to the review board among civilians and the Poughkeepsie Police Benevolent Association (PBA), the city’s police union. Union members felt that it was an uncalled-for intrusion by non-police actors into the department’s own disciplinary process. A lengthy Facebook post from the PBA blasted local activists by calling them outsiders, and lambasts councilmembers Evan Menist, Sarah Salem and Sarah Brannen as “Carpetbaggers.”

Some opponents of the CRB claim that the extra oversight was hypocritical of the Common Council. They argue moving forward with the CRB while the council’s own oversight structure lay dormant was an example of expecting accountability for others while dismissing it for themselves. Ethics Committee chair Colleen Kinneary-McCabe explained that the holdup to the Poughkeepsie Ethics Committee was caused by protracted communications between the Common Council and Corporation Council, the city’s lawyer.

Since the controversy over the CRB bill has died down, the PBA has changed their tone.

In a marathon Common Council meeting on March 1, Rolison, Pape and Captain Wilson presented the police reform plan to the Common Council. Weeks prior, when the plan was released for public input, the PBA Facebook posted, “The members of the City of

Poughkeepsie PBA are proud to be at the forefront of progressive policing. We are proud of our accomplishments and will continue to improve the way we serve our community.” Moving forward, collaboration between the mayor, the council and the union will be imperative, as it will take legislative action to bring some of the policy plans to fruition.

The Police Revitalization and Reform Plan calls for a civilian review board ostensibly similar to the one outlined in the legislation introduced by Menist back in September 2020. The proposal raises questions about the CRB’s authority, including its level of sovereignty from the police department, its ability to subpoena and whether or not the body will have the power to discipline offending police officers. The plan acknowledged Menist’s legislation, but stated that the city administration and police chief would “carefully weigh all the options, including ensuring such a board has qualified members who receive adequate training in the nuances of this highly important function.” Their plan calls for “two City of Poughkeepsie PBA members; two members of the Police Command Staff; two members of the Common Council; two members of the community,” to recommend the structure and sovereignty of a future review board. Menist’s original legislation called for all board members to be filled by non-police officers.

Commitments extend to the city's education system. In police reform thought, the “school to prison pipeline” is a well known phenomena. It refers to the carceral nature of discipline in school as well as the economic and societal mechanisms that disproportionately accelerate low income and BIPOC communities into the justice system. The Poughkeepsie School Disctrict’s only high school, PHS, is nearly 90 percent Black and Hispanic, 64 percent economically disadvantaged and has a 60 percent graduation rate, compared to Dutchess County’s average graduation rate of 88 percent.

The reform plan calls out that trend with an eye towards creating diversity in the ranks.

The CPPD intends to form a “pathway to policing” with the Poughkeepsie school district and Dutchess Community Colleges, creating programs for high school students to earn an education in criminal justice and the opportunity to take a free civil service exam. The department already has a detective in place as a school resource officer which it claims, “Forged positive relationships with students and staff as well as community stakeholders as well as coordination with available service agencies,” though police presence in school is commonly thought to be a symptom of the school to prison apparatus.

Though a step in the right direction, the plan is missing a critical “residency requirement” for CPPD officers according to councilmember Cherry, who expressed her displeasure with the missing reform. The Poughkeepsie native recalled that, when she was growing, there was a residency requirement and less of a diversity problem within the police department: “interactions with

Dean Kopitsky/The Miscellany News.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

the police were completely different...it was nothing for us to be at King Street Park playing kickball with police officers. It was nothing for us to be on Main Street and officers know you by name,” she recalled.

That residency requirement was negotiated away years ago. One measure in the plan that Cherry supported was the lifting of the 60 college credit requirement for becoming a candidate for the department, although recruits will have five years to reach the 60 credit threshold once they graduate from the Police Academy, which counts as 30 credits for DCC or SUNY schools.

In a move towards transparency, the CPPD will also make its internally collected criminal justice statistics more public and commit to the New York State Police Statistics and Transparency Act. Signed in June 2020, the law requires any officer that discharges their weapon on or off duty where a person could be struck by a bullet from their weapon report to their supervisor within six hours and file a written report within 48 hours after discharging their weapon. The department will also commit to making its civilian complaint process more accessible as well as remodeling its website along with the rest of the city’s website.

Another stated goal of the collaborative is to renew the department’s work on de-escalation practices. It instituted a 40-hour training program which teaches officers to recognize a mental health crisis, properly mitigate the situation and transport those in crisis “to the appropriate facility for treatment by experts.”

The plan’s stated reform is to ensure that all members of the department receive the training. As it stands, 70 out of approximately 90 officers have done so.

Diversion from law enforcement is a tenant of a new LEAD, or Law Enforcement Assisted Diversion Program. The program, modeled after others in the state, will decentralize the carceral system in dealing with those with mental illnesses or developmental disorders.

Though details of the program aren’t enumerated by the report, it will work in conjunction with the Crisis Intervention Team (CIT), a program launched in 2015 which redirects applicants towards resources better suited for treatment than the justice system.

Many of the stated policies in the plan are unspecified and often refer to already existing programs. Eight hours of instruction on implicit bias, what the reform plan defines as “the automatic association people now make between groups of people and stereotypes about those groups,” already exists for department members, as does training on procedural justice, which the plan alludes to as well. In fact, six CCPD members already teach procedural justice across New York. Another example is the Right to Know Act, which passed in August and is listed among reforms.

Robinson voiced his skepticism of the reinvention plan over the phone: “It is still a failing of Executive Order 203 that it still allowed the police to decide whether or not they wanted to change themselves. They’ve wanted to change themselves. They're an establishment...they don't change easily.”

Despite the impersonal quality of a Zoom call, there was a contemplative weight to the vote on March 29th. Councilmember Cherry became emotional when she used her time to bring the revitalization into a personal scope.

“I have an African-American son...there’s not much you can tell me about police reform. I had to raise him to do certain things that other parents did not have to raise their children to do.” Council Chair Sarah Salem noted that it was the first day of the trial of Derek Chauvin, whose alleged murder of George Floyd thousands of miles to the west in Minneapolis had indirectly resulted in the vote on EO203 that evening.

NEWS

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April 8, 2021

Prison Divestment Campaign releases demands to Vassar admin Continued from Prison on page 1 of the day, the endowment is made out of Vassar family money, our money, so we have a right to know where it goes and have a say in where it goes.”

Speaking in regards to the college’s investment in Trinity Services Group (another prison food service provider the College invests in), Amanita Duga-Caroll, the college’s Vice President of Communications, commented, “Vassar has no control over this investment, as it is co-mingled with other investors and controlled by a common fund. The endowment exists to support the mission of the College and the primary goal of its management is to achieve the best risk-adjusted return. Our endowment’s portfolio manager is a signatory to the United Nations’ Principles of Responsible Investment.”

Quayenortey countered these concerns about the difficulty of financial divestment. She stressed that the college’s decisions must align with its claims that it cares for its communities of color. “It may be difficult to change regulations and institutional rules, but difficult doesn’t mean impossible,” she said. Similarly, Fernando-Peiris believes that none of the campaign’s demands are unreasonable, noting that previous divestment campaigns have succeeded at peer institutions such as Columbia University. Wharton-Ali also said,“It’s actually not as hard as they make it seem,” mentioning that

Vassar previously divested successfully from apartheid after a strong surge of student-led activism.

Citing research done at Freecap Financial, the campaign’s letter asserts, “Having prison labor in a company’s supply chain, or having an active role in the PIC, poses a huge risk to businesses,” and that therefore, divestment is an effective risk-management strategy. For example, they reference the plunge in the reputation of Victoria’s Secret and its publicly-traded parent company, L Brands, after

come communities [has] been the source of getting prison labor, so this is a really good step in the direction of decriminalizing Black people as a whole, but also other people of color as well.” In fact, despite the fact that there are five times more white drug users than Black, 62.7 percent of drug offenders admitted to prison in the United States are Black.

These racialized characteristics of the criminal justice system, such as the criminalization of drug use, have also made Vassar’s hiring practices a central part of

“The organizers rebuked the college for its failure to 'ban the box'—or remove the felony conviction question from professional and student applications.” revelations of the company’s use of prison labor exemplifies the financial risk of investing in the PIC. The campaign also recognized that New York State’s recent legalization of recreational-use marijuana has major implications for the deconstruction of the PIC. Quayenortey noted that legalization alone does not solve the problem, and that there are still major questions relating to the release of currently-incarcerated drug offenders, but said, “The criminalization of a lot of drugs that … are found in low in-

the divestment campaign. The organizers rebuked the college for its failure to “ban the box”—or remove the felony conviction question from professional and student applications.

“Professional and student applicants are not required to answer the felony conviction question, as they are provided with the ability to decline to answer. We are not in the practice of automatically screening out applicants who decline to answer the question,” Duga-Caroll explained. Nonetheless, Sarna said, “Banning the box is a

preliminary first step, so the fact that they haven’t even done that says volumes.” The organizers expressed that they also hope to see increased transparency in regards to the hiring and admission rates for those with past convictions.

Fernando-Peiris lamented that the administration’s rhetoric on the matter falls into a broader pattern of unresponsiveness to student activism. “Vassar was so unresponsive to a no-fail policy, which, again, peer institutions instituted, and yet Vassar somehow is lagging behind. If this summer taught us anything, it’s that there’s a lot of talk going on, and very few people can actually do something about that. And I think Vassar’s primed to set an example of what a responsible institution would do when presented with these issues,” he said.

As the campaign moves forward, its organizers have stressed the importance of approaching the campaign with a pluralistic, inclusive vision—emphasizing their hope that even more people will come to speak with them and get involved in the work. Sarna hoped that regardless of whether each reader decides to sign on to the campaign, reading the document itself will be an eye-opening experience that will compel them to at least share the document and engage in conversation about its goals. At the end of the day, he said, “This isn’t about the four people here, this is about all of us, and all of our money.”

Off-campus travel: Enriching experience or health hazard?

Danielle Recco

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Columnist

n March 1, President Elizabeth Bradley sent out an email announcing Vassar’s prospective plans to institute pre-approved off-campus travel. This updated policy allows for class field trips, sporting events, field research, volunteering, guided tours and fitness events. Individual travel is not included, and all events must be supervised by a faculty member. Despite fluctuating COVID-19 on-campus case numbers, this decision was implemented on the week of March 22.

Bradley assured students that “Exten-

PCR test will be the main indicator, but that “the antigen test is a strong indicator of infectiousness.” An additional PCR test will be required four to seven days after returning to campus.

When asked about the fluctuating number of COVID-19 cases on campus, Hoynes reiterated that health and safety are the administration’s top priority, but that consideration for off-campus travel had been in development since the beginning of the spring semester.

The safety of off-campus travel will be continually assessed. Director of Safety and Security Arlene Sabo notes that off-campus

“Those who have expressed concern about the new policy stand on two opposite sides of the spectrum: those who believe off-campus travel may open the door to more COVID-19 cases on campus and those who believe that the policy is not enough and may favor athletes.” sive health and safety protocols will be in place for students who participate in such off-campus activities.” These protocols included the wearing of a mask at all times and a rapid antigen test within 24 hours of returning to campus, as well as the prohibition of indoor dining and large groups of over fifty students.

However, rapid antigen testing has a 41.2 percent accuracy rate in asymptomatic people. When questioned about this statistic, Dean of the Faculty and Professor of Sociology William Hoynes replied that students and faculty will receive a PCR test three days prior to leaving campus, which have higher accuracy rates but are still prone to error. If the results are not received in time, a rapid antigen test will be administered 24 hours prior to travel. Hoynes said that the

travel can be paused at any time due to an increasing number of COVID-19 cases on campus. Due to the precautions that have been developed based on scientific research and other university policies, Sabo believes “the risks are manageable and if something arises calling for the need to cease the program, we are prepared to do so.”

As for athletics, Vassar has adopted guidelines developed by the Liberty League and the National Collegiate Athletic Association for those competing in intercollegiate competition. According to Sabo, Vassar either meets or exceeds all of these guidelines.

Sabo believes that off-campus travel will help to enrich the college experience, especially because so many activities have been cancelled this year. Hoynes added

that off-campus travel will allow for an extended educational experience through both increased academic opportunities and through community engagement. On a similar note, Bradley wrote in her email that “We recognize that organized off-campus activities are important components of students’ experience. They contribute to positive mental health and intellectual growth, and they forge meaningful connections with the local community.”

Logan Scott ’24, a member of Vassar’s basketball team, wrote, "I believe that off-campus travel, with all the precautions the Liberty League and Vassar implemented, for student-athletes is important, specifically for spring sports this year. Their seasons were canceled last spring and losing 2 years of the sport you've dedicated your life to is devastating."

Those who have expressed concern about the new policy stand on two opposite sides of the spectrum: those who believe off-campus travel may open the door to more COVID-19 cases on campus and those who believe that the policy is not enough and may favor athletes. Maeve Smith ’24 wrote, “I just am absolutely wary of it because I got COVID-19 last month, and I have no idea where from.”

Another student, who asked to remain anonymous, wrote, “My opinion is that either we have off-campus travel for everyone or no off-campus travel. Even though we are allowed organized travel off-campus, I haven’t seen a lot of opportunities for non-athletes while spring athletes get to play various games. Also, Vassar is the only college that I know of where off-campus travel is for the most part prohibited, and I feel like our COVID-19 cases are comparable to those of other colleges in the Northeast.”

On April 5, The VSA released results from a survey of students in which 679 responses were recorded. In response to

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

a question on whether off-campus travel should be increased, decreased or undergo no change, 57.1 percent opted for reduced off-campus travel, showing that a majority of the student body is concerned about the opportunity to leave campus. Howev-

“Sabo believes that off-campus travel will help enrich the college experience, especially because many activities have been cancelled this year.” er, 58 percent also replied that they would be willing to participate in an off-campus event, showing that the majority of students are also receptive to change.

153 comments were submitted in response to the results as well. These responses show a divide between students on their level of comfort with off-campus travel. They range from “NO OFF CAMPUS TRAVEL!” to “Off campus travel is blatant pandering to the sports students and their parents' money” to “I believe we should allow normal off campus travel regardless of what it is for. I believe that our student body is mature and knowledgeable enough to take precaution and wear masks…” The comments convey the fears and apprehension that the pandemic has created, but how can the administration reconcile the two completely different sides of the spectrum?

Sabo noted that regardless of concerns, multiple applications have been submitted for off-campus travel already, and she predicts that this new policy will be utilized to its full extent.

April 8, 2021

ARTS

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'Every designer has an ideology': In defense of logos Massimo Tarridas Columnist

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ogos are generally hated by anyone who considers themselves interested in art.

They’re dismissed, rightfully so, as soulless identifiers. I love them. I’m not referring to the golden arches and curvy white calligraphy set against a blood red background—though those have their own merit in terms of graphic design—but to logos that specifically occur in fashion. There are plenty of reasons as to why they should be appreciated and even respected.

One important reason is strictly economic.

Runway shows will never support a designer’s label, and selling the clothes that appear on them doesn’t help much either. The amount of people who would dare to wear runway clothes are few, and of those, the people who can afford to are even fewer. The solution invented by major fashion houses comes in the form of diffusion lines: a series of cheaper and simpler garments that provides enough income to support their experiments in textile sculpture. Usually, these diffusion lines are subject to negative reception (“diffusion” is an industry euphemism for “watered down”), but this is not always the case. I don’t want to seem obsessed with the duo, but once again the clearest example of this comes from comparing Yohji Yamamoto and Comme des

Garçons’(CDG) Rei Kawakubo. Kawakubo’s runway shows have always been considered among the best, and the artistic gap between these and CDG PLAY is the reason why they have recently been derided for sharing the same first name. Yamamoto collaborated with Adidas to form Y-3, an athletically-oriented distillation of his mainline aesthetics; Kawakubo collaborated with Polish artist Filip Pagowski to create the infamous heartwith-eyes logo for CDG PLAY. Y-3 merits its own runway show, whereas CDG PLAY does not. While the former is seen as a relatively valuable and accessible way of interacting with Yamamoto’s work, the latter is seen as tacky conspicuous consumption, bought and worn by those who will never know Kawakubo’s name, image or importance. But the most crucial aspect of this demographic is the word “bought.” They are the ones supporting the artist, which the rest of us sneering fashion enthusiasts all indirectly benefit from. Those who have purchased a T-shirt and a pair of the mocked Converse x CDG PLAY shoes have given more money to Kawakubo than I have.

I’d venture to say that this is true for most of the people doing the mocking.

Many of these logos also reveal interesting stories or information about the brand. Alessandro Michele at Gucci has been re-appropriating ʼ80s bootlegs for years now, writing

the logo as “Guccy” or with the same cheap colors and font used by the knockoffs. Hermès’ horse-drawn carriage refers to its history of producing accessories for the aristocracy, and its unusual orange color is a product of the post-WWII ink shortage. And as far as PLAY goes, legend has it that Pagowski sketched it once on a napkin and turned that into his final design. Hedi Slimane’s makeover of Yves Saint Laurent included the controversial shortening to simply “Saint Laurent” and the removal of its highly stylized vertical YSL logo for an all-capitalized san-serif bold font. His tenure was so successful for the brand that in the years that followed Balenciaga, Burberry, Berluti and Balmain all switched from beautiful serif fonts (or otherwise “old-world luxury” looking designs) to capitalized san-serif bold fonts that all practically look the same. If I sound bitter, it’s because this faux simplicity removes more of the design language that ultimately defines each label. Simplifying a logo is, from a marketing standpoint, an appeal to the intuition that because they are minimalistic, they are applying their resources towards bettering quality. It implies an increase in substance, with a decrease in ostentatiousness.

This is a false relationship, as these perceived increases and decreases are meaningless if the end product is identical to everything else on the market. Originality is what creates sub-

stance. Thus, I’d prefer it if the companies were self-aware enough to embrace their already ridiculous existence, thereby fulfilling the creative possibilities afforded by big budgets and big price tags.

Those who agree with me might also point out that even when these designers are expressing themselves in ways we deem authentic (or otherwise free from these corporate symbols), the very design of their garments can become a logo itself. Take the Margiela tabi boot, whose divided hallux has become more famous than its inspiration, the Japanese jika tabi; or the classic Chanel suit. I see where this argument comes from, but I’d have to disagree—these garments are iconic instead because of their construction. Both the specificity of the target audience and its lack of promotional intent are barriers for this kind of identifier being deemed a true logo; the CDG PLAY Converses are recognizable by their logo, as a pair of regular Converses are recognizable because of their construction. And some logos happen to be pretty great pieces of art, as defended by Warhol and the rest of the pop art movement. When paired with the designer’s ideology—and every designer has an ideology, obvious or not—the magical effect of the logo fulfills itself and bestows the wearer with a combination of efficient and implicit aesthetic elaboration.

Lovato comes back to life, music with new album Ilana Frost

Guest Columnist

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emi Lovato, the queen of comebacks herself, has finally mastered “the art of starting over” with a candid new redemption album and fresh lease on life. The 28-yearold popstar is no stranger to struggle, having dealt with a plethora of hardships enough for multiple lifetimes: an abusive father, bullying, sexual assault, eating disorders, bipolar disorder, depression and substance abuse.

In July 2018, Lovato’s demons drove her to a near-fatal heroin overdose. She consequently suffered three strokes, a heart attack and permanent brain damage that impaired her vision. Doctors later determined that she was in fact five to 10 minutes away from death on the day of her overdose. Even after years of addiction and her brush with death, though, Lovato’s stunning vocal instrument has remained entirely unscathed and has even grown stronger, which is nothing short of miraculous.

The powerhouse vocalist released her seventh studio album, “Dancing With The Devil...The Art of Starting Over,” on April 2. The record addresses a harrowing chapter leading up to 2018 and explores her journey coming back to life after narrowly escaping the infamous “27 Club.” “DWTDTAOSO” is a flawed but refreshing relaxation of the rigidity that used to define her career. Lovato trades strictly electronic pop production and recycled pop lyrics for a multi-genre album that embraces nostalgic live instrumentation and highlights complex and poetic lyricism. The uninhibited sound reflects a newfound fluidity in her own life, and feels like swapping tight black leather pants for breathable yellow culottes.

The “Dancing With a Devil'' section is a prelude to the bulk of the album, “The Art of Starting over.” In “Anyone,” “Dancing With the Devil'' and “ICU (Madison’s Lullabye),” Lovato cries for help, confesses her sins and dedicates a tear-jerking moment to her baby sister, Madison De La Garza. These tracks spotlight the classic, raw, Aguilera-esque vocals packed with sky-high notes and effortless runs that Demi fans have come to know and worship. “Dancing With the Devil” is a perfect (half) title track; the R&B and jazz-piano-infused tune sonically captures the darkness of Lovato’s relapse with drugs and alcohol that almost led to her downfall. “ICU (Madison’s

Lullabye)” gives a chilling account of the moment she woke up blind in the hospital and couldn’t identify her little sister sitting beside her bed. “I was blind but now I see clearly/ I see you,” she sings to Madison, alluding to the quintessential Christian hymn “Amazing Grace.”

However, the album is no sob story. After those three intro tracks, Lovato transitions into “The Art of Starting Over,” which is primarily, as she puts it, “ethereal dream pop.”

The songs are breezy and bop-worthy, appropriate for cruising through Malibu with the windows down on a sunny day. It’s a new sound for Lovato, who has experimented with everything from pop-rock to R&B to madefor-radio cookie cutters, and it suits her. After her sophisticated pop/R&B sixth studio album, “Tell Me You Love Me,” it was hard to predict what style the singer would conquer next. The record seemed peak maturity, peak serious, peak adult Demi. Of course, the answer was simple—the only direction to go was less serious. In “Dancing With the Devil...

The Art of Starting Over,” we see a glimpse of the “old” Demi at the beginning, but then we are introduced to the “new” Demi. She’s light-hearted and fun. She’s single and fabulous, having a good time with her girls in “California Sober,” proudly queer and finally living her truth in a “Good Place.”

With the exception of “My Girlfriends Are My Boyfriend” with Saweetie, the collaborations are some of the weakest links of the record. The highly anticipated Ariana Grande duet seems out of place and a lot more characteristic of Grande than Lovato, with its overwhelming drama of strings and synths backing playful, but predictable, lyrics.

Grande wrote the track with Lovato in mind— not alongside her—and that much is obvious without checking the song credits. Without a doubt, the pair of top notch female vocalists complement each other vocally, but the album would have benefited from a better contextual fit. The Noah Cyrus collab “Easy” was also disappointing; although there’s nothing wrong with the song itself, neither Cyrus nor Lovato had a hand in its writing and that is again blatant. This ballad about relationships ending is not “ethereal dream pop,” nor is it especially personal to either of the singers, though their voices do sound spectacular to-

gether. Similarly, “What Other People Say” is more driven by Sam Fischer than Lovato, and the generic pop song just doesn’t belong with the rest of the album’s deeply confessional and whimsical pop.

The only successful collaboration is Saweetie’s. It’s the duo we didn’t know we needed, but oh, does it quench that pandemic-era thirst for a high-caliber club hit powered by badass women. “My Girlfriends Are My Boyfriend” is the certified banger of the record, and Saweetie kills her lady empowering, “Best Friend”vibes verse. The bop is well-positioned to be the single girls’ anthem of summer 2021 with its pop gold hook (“My girlfriends are my boyfriend but we’re never gonna break up”) and Lovato’s pointed staccato delivery over an electronic dance beat.

With the likes of Julia Michaels, Madison Love and Justin Tranter, the record is packed with superstar songwriters who are the secrets behind the success of A-list artists like Selena Gomez, Justin Bieber, Camila Cabello and pretty much everyone else on the top 40.

If you’re familiar with their work, you can detect the trio’s signature sharp lyrical prowess and knack for unusual, catchy melodies throughout the album. However, Lovato’s own writing contributions are the moments that really make the record; her story hardly needs embellishment.

The singer takes control of her own narrative in the album’s crowning jewel “The Art of Starting Over.” The light-R&B groovy track sounds like fresh air and new beginnings.

“Give me a pen/ I’m rewriting another ending,” she sings in a controlled, breathy tone (a neat contrast from her signature power belt), “Guess I’m mastering the art of starting over.”

This other title track calls for snapping along, dancing around your room and celebrating Lovato’s newfound comeback.

In “The Way You Don’t Look At Me” and “Melon Cake,” the star offers musical diary entries about her decades-long battle with anorexia and bulimia. In the first, she candidly admits to losing 10 pounds in two weeks after forcing herself to. In the latter, she tells the haunting story of an emotionally abusive team who encouraged her to eat melon cake instead of birthday cake and fired an assistant for buying her a chocolate bar. Now, the singer’s saying, “No more melon cakes on

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

birthdays/ No more barricades in doorways/ Finally get to do things my way.”

Although it’s not the focus of the project, we get glimpses of Lovato’s single and queer love life in several songs. “The Kind of Lover I Am,” is a jam draped in daydreamy reverb that details all of her relationship quirks. With chill acoustic guitar and airy drums, she croons with confident ease, “Doesn’t matter you’re a woman or a man/ That’s the kinda lover I am.” The track illustrates six years of immense growth since “Cool For the Summer,” the 2015 hit where Lovato subtly alluded to experimenting with women and “not telling her mother.” This time around the queer tune is sweet, simple and unabashedly honest.

“15 Minutes” savagely blasts the singer’s ex-fiance, actor Max Ehrich. The couple’s engagement was brief, only lasting for a few months before it became clear that Ehrich was only interested in his “15 minutes” of fame.

The bridge, “Cryin’ in Malibu, cryin’ in Malibu/ How could you, how could you” seems like a direct reference to Ehrich’s alleged publicity stunt when he cried for paparazzi at the beach where he initially proposed. Lovato’s unforgiving sing-growl on the chorus and the blunt diss makes Ehrich the butt of the joke; he likely regrets his “15 minutes” now.

“Good Place” is a satisfying ending to the story where Lovato assures us she’s finally doing well, but “California Sober” is the golden track of “DWTDTAOSO” and best embodies exactly where she’s at in this new era of life post her momentary death. “I’m California sober/ It doesn’t have to mean the growing part is over/ No it ain’t black and white, it’s all of the colors that I only just discovered.” Lovato finds freedom through balance; she no longer restricts or binges food, limits her love life to men or entirely denies herself weed here and there. In the past, she had to be skinny, heteronormative and stone-cold sober, and those “black and whites” were the vehicle that nearly drove her to her deathbed. Amidst ongoing backlash over her unconventional recovery plan, the star pleads with fans to understand that life is complicated, she’s complicated and everyone should do what works for them.

Finally, three years after waking up legally blind, she sees all of the colors. “DWTDTAOSO,” much like Demi, is complex, imperfect and triumphant.

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April 8, 2021

Crochet Coral Reef nurtures interdisciplinary communities Naima Saini

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Guest Columnist

f you enter the Bridge, you can see that a new ecosystem has taken over. An array of colors and textures intertwine with each other, spilling out over the building’s platforms, with parts even adhering to the stone walls. It is fluffy, ridged, soft and wrinkly, it is every color of the rainbow, and it wraps around itself countless times.

It belongs in an ocean, but it’s made entirely out of yarn. This is the Vassar College Crochet Coral Reef.

The Crochet Coral Reef is a collaborative art piece made by about 40 Vassar students and faculty members and organized by the Grand Challenges Program. According to their website, “The Grand Challenges Program is an opportunity for students to actively shape our Vassar experience, to equip ourselves and future students to critically understand climate change and its accompanying injustices, and to use our distinct perspectives to collaboratively construct solutions.” Lab Coordinator for the Earth Science and Geography Department Rick Jones and Environmental Studies major Maya Pelletier ’22 led the project; they reached out to students, mailed yarn to participants, facilitated meetings and webinars and worked on piecing together individual corals into the finished product.

Participants crocheted their corals during winter break and connected with one another online. The reef was designed to create an opportunity for intersection between different disciplines. “We hoped that an art major would get some math out of it and understand a little bit more about their world, and maybe a math major would start to groove on the art a little bit, and the biologists would figure out how math and art intersect with their stuff,” Jones explained.

Amber Huang ’23 appreciated how participating in this project made complex topics more accessible. “I learned a lot about corals and the math behind corals,” she said. “I am a math correlate, but I am [specifically] a stats correlate, so the theoretical math behind it isn’t really what I’m into, but it was really cool learning about how corals and especially crochet are ways to replicate this super complicated math. I also love that crochet is the way to do it, because math seems so sterile.”

In addition to having Zoom meetings where people could hang out and chat about their crocheting, Grand Challenges also hosted webinars where participants could learn more about different topics related to the project. These subjects ranged from hyperbolic math to fiber arts as a form of political expression. Anjali Krishna ’23, a biology major who participated in the project, liked getting to learn more about corals through a lecture by Associate Professor of Biology Jodi Schwarz. “That was really cool, to learn what we were replicating,” Krishna said.

Krishna used to know how to crochet, but had forgotten by the beginning of the coral project. She quickly picked it back up again, though, by watching video tutorials. “I watched two of them and kind of taught myself, and did troubleshooting from there,” she said. “It was pretty easy to learn.” Krishna ended up making five corals for the reef.

The instructions for the crochet reef were meant as inspiration rather than strict direction; participants were allowed to take creative license with their pieces. Because of this, the corals that people made varied in size, shape, texture and color. “It’ll look brighter than a coral reef would,” Jones said of the installation. “But in the impression

of form and life, it’ll feel a lot like it.”

The piece that is currently on display at the Bridge also includes creations from 2011, when Vassar did a similar project as part of a greater global network of crocheted coral reefs. Margaret and Christine Wertheim, two artists who wanted to creatively represent science concepts and

experience. “It really was a great way to create community in this time where we were all so isolated, without making it too centered on the virtual,” she said. “It was a very concrete project that had a virtual element to bring out the best in it.”

The project culminated in the Coral Expo on April 1, the grand opening of the

portant ecosystems, and they are in danger. A poster next to the installation calls attention to this issue, explaining, “The biggest threat to corals is rising ocean temperature, which causes coral symbiosis to break down.” When the ocean becomes warmer, corals can lose the algae that they have a crucial symbiotic relationship with,

Juliette Pope/The Miscellany News. bring awareness to environmental issues, were the first to create such a reef, and their project was exhibited in the Smithsonian and other galleries around the world. They were inspired by Daina Taimina, a mathematician who had discovered the ability to model hyperbolic curves by crocheting corals. In addition to the Wertheims’ project, communities in any location could create “satellite reefs” crocheted collaboratively by local individuals, and Vassar became one of them.

Ten years ago, the project looked very different—students learned their stitches at in-person events, and there were no limits on how many people could gather together to do so. But part of the reason Grand Challenges decided to revisit this project during this year was precisely because of the pandemic and the newfound difficulties in fostering relationships with others.

Jones and the others who spearheaded the project wanted a way to develop a sense of community that people might otherwise be lacking during this year’s extra-long winter break.

Nandeeta Bala ’22, an intern for Grand Challenges, appreciated this aspect of the

installation. Open to anyone at Vassar, the event included live sea anemones from Schwarz’s lab that attendees could feed and observe under a microscope, seaweed snacks for visitors and instructional hand-

causing what is known as coral bleaching.

Other threats, according to a visual on the poster, include overfishing, tourism and poor water quality. It is an important reminder that the Crochet Coral Reef rep-

“The project is a beautiful work of art, but it is also a tool to raise environmental awareness. Coral reefs are incredibly important ecosystems, and they are in danger.” outs on how to crochet your own corals.

Of course, though, the reef itself was the main attraction. “It was so pretty,” said Huang. “I loved trying to figure out which ones I made.”

While the event was only open to those on campus, the project was also accessible to those who are remote. “It was so easy to participate remotely,” said Bala. “I just sent photos in, and [Jones] printed them out on thicker paper, and cut it out, and put it with the rest of it, and sent me photos of that. It was really sweet.”

The project is a beautiful work of art, but it is also a tool to raise environmental awareness. Coral reefs are incredibly im-

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

resents one of the many biological communities threatened by climate change.

The accessible, collaborative nature of the project makes its message of awareness particularly powerful. “You don’t have to have had 10 years of painting in order to make a statement,” said Jones. “You can use a traditional hand craft, or what’s thought of as ‘women’s work’ as a tool for expression and as a tool for circumventing normal artistic boundaries.” The vibrant Crochet Coral Reef lives up to this, both fostering community and delivering an impactful message.

The VC Crochet Coral Reef is at the Bridge through the end of April.

April 8, 2021

FEATURES

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Vassar hotline assists in securing vaccine appointments Continued from Vaccine on page 1 sar Vaccine Hotline was formed.

Booking a vaccination appointment can be a confusing, complicated process.

First, users must find their way to the COVID-19 vaccine section on the official New York State website. Then, after clicking a few links, users must fill out questions to confirm their eligibility, before perusing locations near them that have appointments available. The entire process requires technological knowledge and access to the Internet, which some people may not have. Even if one has the means and the know-how to make an appointment, actually finding an availability is an entirely different battle. Bookings are filled quickly, and some vaccination spots, including many pharmacies and local pop-up locations, aren’t even shown on the New York State website.

Edwards distributed the Vaccine Hotline phone number to every resident in her district via a robocall and robo-email, paying special attention to marginalized communities and residents over the age of 65. The hotline number is a Google Voice number, which is connected to Carter’s personal cell phone. When she gets a call, Carter notes the caller’s personal information and additional details like their access to transportation and the furthest they are prepared to travel for an appointment.

Carter mentioned that she also often finds herself lending an ear to callers’ frustrations and hopes for the future. “A lot of times people also need someone to listen

while they vent about how difficult it is to get the vaccine, or how excited they are to get back to normal life,” she said. After all the information is recorded in the program’s shared spreadsheet, the volunteers begin to hunt for available appointments.

Currently, around 10 students are volunteering at the hotline, scouting appointments for persons who place a call.

One active volunteer is Chelsea Zak ’23, who found out about the hotline from a post of Carter’s on the Facebook group Vassar: The Virtual Version. “I was a little intimidated at first because…I know how hard it is to book appointments,” Zak admitted. But, after helping a few callers, she found that she had a knack for finding available vaccination spots. Finding an appointment, especially when it’s on behalf of another person, is an art that requires experience, strategy and patience.

“We need to have all the right information,” Zak stressed. “We need the email, the [phone] number, the date of birth, what qualifies the person for a vaccine…

[We] need to have it all because there are so many little hurdles.”

After she gets the caller’s information from Carter, Zak goes on several vaccine websites to see if there are appointments in their desired area. Sometimes appointments are extremely hard to find, and Zak finds herself looking for an availability for a certain caller for weeks. Other times, the stars align, and she quickly finds an appointment at the right place and right time. “It’s a lot about luck, but it’s also

putting in the time,” she explained. So far, Zak’s vaccine-hunting skills have helped three hotline callers secure an appointment, and she is currently searching for appointments for others.

At the moment, the hotline only serves residents in Edwards’ district, which includes the majority of the town of Poughkeepsie. “We wanted to keep it small to make sure we could keep up with demand at first—it’s still a pretty new service,” Carter stated. “But we’re hoping to expand to Barrington Atkins’ district soon (City of Poughkeepsie) and possibly other legislators around Dutchess.” Edwards also mentioned that, this week, the hotline will begin to include Spanish-language phone calls to residents to advertise the resource.

Although the hotline has been running for less than a month, it has already gotten around 30 calls, about half of which were persons getting permission to share the number with others or asking for the steps to make an appointment themselves. “It’s a rare day where I don’t get at least one call, whether it’s someone new or someone checking in,” Carter mentioned.

One thing that gets the volunteers through the rough days of scouring the web: the success stories. “I had the sweetest woman with the best Long Island accent call in asking for an appointment, first for herself and then for someone who she is a caregiver for,” Carter remembered. “We were able to get those appointments quickly, and she has been so thank-

ful, and passed around our information to many of her friends!”

So far, the hotline has helped six people get vaccination appointments and has directed others to vaccine resources and websites. The team is expecting more calls as they expand their horizons, though, and welcomes any Vassar students who want to join the cause.

With mass vaccination suggesting the possibility of ending the year-long pandemic, there is a sense of urgency running through the hotline volunteers— and a feeling that they are inspiring real change. “Though I happily got the vaccine as a work-study student when my supervisor asked me to, I’ve felt a lot of guilt about receiving it when people in the community who are much older and much more at risk haven’t yet,” Carter said. “So it has been really rewarding to feel like I’m doing my part to help out, and that Vassar students are using [their] time and energy to make connections to people in the area. It can be stressful to manage because it feels like so much is on the line—and so frustrating to see how difficult and inequitable the process is for people—but that stress is so worth it, even if we just get one person a vaccine.”

As the hotline volunteers continue to hunt for vaccination appointments for the community, Zak’s sentiment resonates with the entire team and keeps them pushing forward: “Vaccines are so important, and we need to get them in as many arms as possible.

Birthday celebrations during COVID-19: Aries Edition Monika Sweeney

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Reporter

hile COVID-19 restrictions make it difficult for big birthday bashes to be held on the quad or packed into a Main suite, Vassar students have found a way to make the most out of their situation by hosting subtle celebrations instead.

Jules Cianciotta ’24 rang in her March 22 birthday by watching reruns of “America’s Next Top Model” with her pod. As soon as the clock struck midnight, her pod sang “Happy Birthday” with a few other masked friends joining in for the chorus from the hallway. “It was just a really cute moment with a few of my favorite people making it extra special,” she said. Afterwards, Cianciotta and her pod spent a few hours sitting in the hallway talking about everything from dinosaurs to fun socks. “It was a lot of laughs and smiles and just a really positive way to start off my birthday,” she said of those early morning hours.

As for the rest of her day, Cianciotta spent it in various ways: class, ordering Chinese food

Jules Cianciotta ’24, Joseph McMahon ’24 and Fudgie the Whale.

Courtesy of Abbie Smith ’24.

and relaxing in Noyes’ MPR. While Cianciotta usually favors over-the-top celebrations with a lot of people, she was happy to downsize this year to keep herself and others safe.

“COVID kept me from having more people [invited] and a bigger party, but all in all it was pretty fun,” she admitted. Her favorite gifts included a “blanket-sweatshirt hybrid,” otherwise known as a comfy, from her roommate and a gold bracelet from her boyfriend.

Cianciotta, whose only birthday wishes were to have a Fudgie the Whale cake (for those not familiar, Fudgie the Whale is the best ice cream cake ever, created and exclusively sold in Carvels, a predominantly East Coast ice cream franchise) and for everyone to enjoy themselves, was very happy with a relaxed celebration this year. “It was a pretty chill birthday, it was nothing big and it really shouldn’t have been big because of COVID anyways,” she noted.

Katie Reisig ’24, a fellow Aries, turned 19 on March 28. She celebrated with an eventful birthday weekend full of fun festivities, good food and even better friends. To kick off the celebration, her parents ordered takeout for her and her podmates from a Mexican restaurant, complete with vanilla and chocolate cupcakes topped with pastel frosting. Her aunt also sent an assortment of fancy cheeses, which were quickly used to make late-night grilled cheese sandwiches. Other surprises sent from home included flowers and Taylor Swift socks from her parents. One of her favorite gifts was an Aries-themed vinyl from her friend Steven.

In terms of festivities, Reisig and her pod decided to throw a COVID-safe iCarly party, complete with an iCarly and Victorious playlist and homemade Penny Tees just like the characters made in the show. “I love my birthday and this was the first time in a long time that I didn’t spend it with my family, but my friends made it amazing and my family sent love from home,” she commented. Reisig’s intimate get-together concluded around the

fire pits stationed by Ely Hall with music, latenight conversations and round after round of musical chairs with friends. While COVID-19 restrictions swiftly narrowed down the ways Reisig could celebrate, she was just glad to have had the opportunity to be around her friends in a safe environment. “Being outside and keeping the circle small helped keep us safe and happy,” she explained.

Tabby Hannam ’23, who celebrated her 20th birthday on April 2, adored her birthday celebration this year. To start her day, Hannam called her family back home to catch up and open presents they had sent. Katie Grove ’23, a close friend of Hannam’s, then spent the rest of the day orchestrating a slew of surprises. Such surprises included a lunch with friends in Blodgett’s courtyard, dinner from Falafel Town and gooey cinnamon rolls for dessert in Cushing. Surrounded by pod members, the Boxing Nuns Ultimate Frisbee team and a group of friends from her dorm, Hannam expressed nothing but gratitude and happiness for the celebrations.

Hannam’s favorite part of the day was when

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

two of her friends surprised her with homemade cinnamon rolls, still soft and warm from the oven. They were able to enjoy these sweet confections with Lizzo and Taylor Swift on shuffle in the background. “My friend Katie had already pulled out so many surprises and that was the metaphorical cherry on top,” Hannam commented.

While it was difficult working out the logistics of celebrating birthdays during a pandemic, the biggest issues being how many people can be invited and what space can safely fit an appropriate number of people, Cianciotta, Reisig and Hannam all safely navigated Aries season without sacrificing the fun of a birthday celebration. “The older I get, [birthdays have] definitely become more of a chance to spend time with friends and family than to be oriented around presents,” Hannam added.

All three women emphasized that the most important aspect of celebrating a birthday was being surrounded by friends, good food and music. Luckily, they were able to do just that by utilizing the pod system, Grubhub, on-campus fire pits and nostalgic 2010’s hits.

Ruby Garcia ’24 and Eli Hinerfield ’24 enjoying birthday treats.

Courtesy of Katie Reisige ’24.

HUMOR

Page 8

April 8, 2021

Breaking News

From the desk of Izzy Migani, Humor Editor

Legal weed in New York makes watching Fast and Furious movies suddenly very fun One TV show to watch instead of applying to jobs Blair Webber

W

Crazy Ex Girlfiend Expert

ith graduation and the end of the school year only a few short months away, many students are shifting their focus from their academic work to job searching. Whether for a summer internship or a first job after college, job hunting takes time, navigating exhausting cyber etiquette and handling strings of rejection.

But there is a way out for students overwhelmed by the job hunting process: stop doing it and watch “Crazy Ex Girlfriend.”

Originally airing on The CW in 2015, this four-season musical comedy has something for everyone: romance, power struggles and discussions of serious mental health issues through comedic song and dance. In spite of critical success and the adoration of its fandom, according to Wikipedia, “Crazy Ex Girlfriend” is, “one of the lowest-rated shows in television history to be renewed through four

seasons by its parent network.” However, don’t let this stop you. Keep in mind that Netflix launched its streaming platform in 2007, followed a year later by Hulu, so in the context of TV history, by 2015 network television viewers were probably dropping across the board since how people consumed content was changing.

The historical context of “Crazy Ex Girlfriend” as a cable channel show in the mid to late 2010’s, as well as its having been a show on the CW that was not about werewolves or vampires, are just a few of the many rabbit holes you can go down as you watch “Crazy Ex Girlfriend.” The show itself offers plenty of distractions. There are more couples to ship than “Twilight.”

Not only does the show ask us to ask ourselves, “Who will Rebecca end up with?”, it also begs the questions, “Who will Darryl end up with? and “When they sing, is it just in Rebecca’s imagination, is everyone else imagining it to or does it actual-

ly happen in the world of the show?” An entire love square develops in season four, prompting the send up of old Marilyn Monroe musical comedies, “The Math of Love Quadrangles,” which is itself a send up of “The Math of Love Triangles,” a musical number featured in an earlier season. This show is more self-aware than a college senior trying to balance humor and professionalism in an email to a former internship supervisor.

Some may find the show drags a little at the beginning of season four, but do not let your future career and need for economic stability distract you from watching. You won’t want to miss their spoof on Chicago’s “Cell Block Tango.” It’ll have you singing “ra ta ta” as you stare blankly at your LinkedIn page for three hours before deciding you have done enough job hunting for the day.

“Crazy Ex Girlfriend” has something for everyone entering the job market.

Those who are not men may find comfort in one Season 3 opening number, “Let’s Generalize About Men,” since honestly it’s still a man’s world out there no matter what industry you’re going into. The same season also offers comfort to all the men out there needing to dance out their feelings of rejection and fear and childhood trauma in, “Fit Hot Guys Have Problems Too.” Either way, these little ditties will cure you of the fatigue of having to write “I hope this email finds you well in these uncertain times” over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over.

And of course, for those of us feeling some nostalgia about college coming to an end, maybe even contemplating applying to grad schools in the next year just to drag this stint in academia out a little longer, “Crazy Ex Girlfriend” is here to remind us exactly what college has been: “It Was A S*** Show.”

Dr G’s Love Advice Week 13: A post-nut clarity conundrum Dear Dr. G, I had a hook-up last weekend who I thought was super hot and totally my type, but as soon as I came I felt like I never wanted to have sex ever again. I had sex again this morning with my neighbor and it happened again. What’s wrong with me?

-Is this Catholic Guilt?

Dear Guilt, I fear that this may be a topic which hits close to home for many readers, but nonetheless I have a duty to discuss it. Let’s talk about post-nut clarity.

This phenomenon is most common after watching porn. It’s always the porn that you would normally scroll past, where they’re doing something sort of weird thing that you’re not really into.

The type of stuff that you would usually see an ad for in the corner of the porn you want to actually watch, which has a ridiculous or problematic plot, but for some reason today you think, “Maybe this is hot?” But, as soon as you’re done with the deed, you look at your screen and realize you just nutted to “big t*tty goth M*LF catches step-son with a new young girlfriend” or something equally as cringe (I’m not here to kinkshame but the production value is just … low). This can happen with your own thoughts, too; you’re just letting your mind wander as you go to town thinking about your hot biochemistry professor, but half an hour afterwards you’re in lab looking at him and he’s just not the sex god you were imagining him to be. For those who need no mental or visual aid to reach climax, idk why are you reading a sex advice article? Go do your Urban Studies Essay, I know you already got two extensions on it :/.

So, how do we fight this epidemic of somber post-nut clarity? The first option is much easier said than done; I encourage you to try only having sex with people you like. In a campus utterly saturated

Juliette Pope/The Miscellany News. with hookup culture, during a semester where the only people you see outside of your pod are those you grab a “socially distanced meal” with or are boning, many of us will tend to reach out to that Tinder match that we are not totally enthused about. But if you think about it, who does that help? In the end, feeling like you just watched a Studio A24 film after each time you climax with a near stranger is not a joyous way to spend your precious time.

Look, I’m not saying you have to marry the person, but maybe more than three messages back and forth before you decided to f*ck would make you feel a little better about your nearly random sexual partner. Plus, what’s worse than having sex with someone and then finding out they like the Deece Chicken Bacon Ranch pizza only after they have already cum inside of you? By then, the ship has simply sailed.

To combat the issue when you’re rock-

ing solo, consider whether your porn is ethical or not. I know that we all have that favorite video/story which we could reproduce shot-for-shot if asked, and I’m not asking you to give that up. But, I’m gonna bet that if you consume porn you probably do almost all of it for free on places like PornHub, XVideos, or Twitter (RIP Tumblr for porn). It’s always the weird video that you never thought you’d watch on one of these massive sites, where neither (or none, if you like group stuff) of the people even look like their heart is in it. Do you think you being the three millionth viewer of a porn produced nine years ago is going to make a significant contribution to that sex worker’s income?

My alternative is certainly not the cheapest, but it’s certainly the more sustainable choice, which is to support more local sex workers through websites like OnlyFans.

Don’t you have someone you follow on

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Twitter who you think you would be best friends with? You love their content, their jokes, and you just want them to be successful and live their best life? And then suddenly one day they drop an OnlyFans link? This is your chance. Better yet, maybe you have a favorite pod at Vassar who is on the verge of making the jump into amateur porn stardom; they’re going to need some support, so don’t be afraid to ante up to get off.

I’m sure there’s some studies or actual real life scholarship that discuss this, so if you want to do a deep dive into postnut clarity scholarship, be my guest. But, wouldn’t you rather drink the gospel truth straight from the mouth of your favorite Vassar sexual anthropologist? Tbh, next time I can spit the information directly into your mouth if you’re into that (hmu through a cryptic post on @VassarConfessions on Instagram, I’ll see it, probably).

HOROSCOPES

HUMOR

April 8, 2021

Page 9

Madi Donat

Astral Projector

ARIES

March 21 | April 19

Here’s your excuse to BE DARING. Maybe get a tattoo or something? Send a long sext in public complete with many descriptive emojis and wait for someone to look over your shoulder to see what’s up. I am not very daring. Write in and tell me how to be more daring!

LIBRA

September 23 | October 22

I think we undervalue the simple act of being very very goofy. Let’s all be jesters for a little bit! Make a notebook for creative but unfunny puns. Buy some silks to tie together and pull out of your sleeves. Pile into a car with your pod (to get VACCINATED! But also to be clowns.)

If you could be any animal, which would it be? If you

TAURUS can’t be that animal, pick a different one. Keep doing

April 20 | May 20

GEMINI

May 21 | June 20

this until you have five animals. Now Google each of the five and find the cutest picture. Save them, make a collage, and make that your screensaver. You’re welcome.

I am ADDICTED to Sudoku. I think I need an intervention. Puzzle games are fun but this is your warning to quit while you’re ahead. As soon as the mobile ads start bothering you DELETE IT. Otherwise you’ll end up where I am––really good at Sudoku. But at what cost?

Anyone else feeling particularly ~fragile~ lately? Like

CANCER you’re a human but also a balloon and anyone who says

June 21 | July 22

anything to you ever is actually holding a very sharp needle very close in your direction. If so I hope you get well soon. If not, teach me your ways.

July 23 | August 22

Watching old movies IS therapy! Here are some ideas to get you started: “High School Musical.” “High School Musical 2.” “The Cheetah Girls.” “Spy Kids.” “Sharkboy and Lavagirl.” “Ratatouille.” And et cetera. [Please also do actual therapy if you need. Therapy is very good.]

VIRGO

Change is good! Sometimes. Changing little things is

LEO

August 23 | always a neat and fun way to spice up your life. Like September maybe, instead of not studying, you could try actually studying. I don’t know though, maybe that’s a little too 22 wild. I’m certainly not at that level of novelty yet.

SCORPIO

Cooking for others is honestly the highest possible form

October 23 | of love. You don’t even need to be a good cook to make November 21 some killer stew for your friends! Oil + spices + vegetables + broth + rice = being able to shake hands with God.

Learning is so awesome. You should learn a new SAGITTARIUS language! It’s fun and builds synapses in your brain November 22 | or whatever, even if you don’t use it everyday. Create your own Tower of Babel in your head when you December 21 remember the word you need in every language you don’t need it in.

Walking is so freeing! Literally just go on a really long

CAPRICORN walk and explore buildings you’ve never been in. I’m

December 22 | always surprised at how many places on this campus January 19 I’ve just never bothered to visit. Email me a picture of your most unexpected find: mdonat@vassar.edu.

AQUARIUS

January 20 | February 18

PISCES

February 19 | March 20

Write a poem! I know, ew. But it can be really neat if you put your mind to it! Remember, poems don’t have to rhyme and they don’t even need to have line breaks!

As long as you’re putting words to the emotions that make you feel like you got punched in the gut you’re good.

Get up really early one day this week just for fun. You might be mad at yourself the rest of the day, but that’s what naps are for. I see so few sunrises but the ones I have are staggeringly beautiful. Take pictures and send them to me: mdonat@vassar.edu. My inbox is DRY.

FROG AND TOAD ARE FRENEMIES

by Frog

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

HUMOR

Page 10

April 8, 2021

VSA reevaluates org approval process after string of incidents Zachary Cohen

Definitely Not MarkyMark

A string of on-campus incidents has forced the Vassar Student Association to re-evaluate the validity of some of its student organizations. After review, multiple preliminary and even some certified organizations were suspended or shut down for reckless conduct. This morning, the VSA released a full list of club closures and suspensions.

The first club to be shuttered by the VSA was the Rabid Coyote Husbandry Club (RCHB). The popular coyote-breeding organization first received complaints on Thursday night, after Hermione, their most prolific stud female, escaped her first-year handlers during an artificial insemination session, and resurfaced in the ecological preserve the following morning to attack a trail runner in broad daylight. When asked to comment, Hermione growled menacingly and drooled all over the floor. The trail runner requested anonymity, but when asked to comment, responded, “RCBH is an absolute disgrace. I don’t know what they’re playing at, but they need to get those coyotes out of there before someone gets killed.” The trail runner then growled menacingly and drooled all over the floor.

Next on the list was the Uranium Enrichment Club, whose first year of existence came to a sudden end after a leak of radioactive chemicals in the woods near Sunset Lake. The group had been a hot topic across campus for its attempts to extract large quantities of uranium-235 isotopes every Tuesday and Friday from 6 to 8 p.m. Despite having a pair of physics and chemistry double majors in leadership positions, the group was unable to safely contain their experiments, as one of the gas centrifuges they had commissioned from the art department’s introductory sculpture class ruptured, irradiating a 500-meter stretch of trees along Raymond Avenue. An anonymous source from the president’s office reported the college was ill-equipped to manage the effects of radiation poisoning, but they did confirm that many afflicted students have been used by roommates as a cheap

alternative to LED lighting.

The Random Wild Mushroom Tasting Club was also permanently disbanded, as the group’s remarkably short meeting times were linked to the onset of vomiting spells and extreme hallucinations after an average of seven minutes. The final straw was a formal complaint from Health Services, claiming that the club needed more buckets and straitjackets than they could provide. When asked about the future of random wild mushroom tasting on campus, the club’s former president, who gave her name as “Uh, all the stars in the— the grass”, refused to comment, citing the presence of a nearby group of fifteen-foot bipedal rainbow squirrels doing push-ups and practicing their Scottish accents.

Undoubtedly, one of the most controversial club closures was Intramural DodgeBow. Founded by roommates frustrated with Vassar’s lack of investment in archery and dodgeball, Intramural DodgeBow racked up a record number of signatures on its application petition in August. However, the VSA shut the club down after its first week of practices, all of which ended with double-digit punctures. Speaking from Vassar Brothers Hospital, club Treasurer Karl Johnson addressed the club’s critics with an impassioned “Not…a foul…mommy” before being interrupted by his doctor.

With such a high-profile list of closures, most club suspensions have flown under the radar. One group whose suspension may have warranted more attention was the Unscrupulous Hackers’ Alliance (UHA), an affinity group for skilled programmers with no aversion to stealing their fellow students’ personal information. The UHA was suspended in conjunction with Vocally Compromised, an acapella group founded by UHA’s president—known only as MarkyMark. The group was suspended after its first public performance—a vocal arrangement of the ID’s and passwords of more than two dozen students. Putting two and two together, the VSA, many of whose ID’s were featured in the performance, suspended the UHA. The decision was met with internal uproar. Fifteen minutes after the

Juliette Pope/The Miscellany News. announcement the VSA’s official Facebook account posted, “Our decision was bullshit. The UHA did nothing wrong.

MarkyMark will rise again.”

So far, the only theatre org to face any repercussions is Vassar’s experimental Bonfire Theatre troupe, whose programming was suspended following the most recent in a series of theatre fires. This did not sit well with Luna Vargas ’22, who was supposed to play the lead role in their upcoming production “Let’s Burn This Place to the Ground”. When asked to comment, Vargas took a break from spreading handfuls of dried grass across the floor of the Powerhouse Theatre and covering them with lighter fluid, and embarked on a fifteen-minute tirade about how little the VSA appreciates art.

With the recruitment of new members high on every club’s mind at the start of the year, the VSA preemptively suspended both the Espionage Club and the Counter-Espionage Club, to avoid a repeat of last year’s mysterious accidents and

B'S CORNER

BY B GOMEZ

The opinions expressed above do not represent those of The Miscellany News as a whole.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

international intrigue. The Miscellany News has received comments from both clubs, but our staff cryptanalysts have not come close to deciphering either one.

STOP PRESS In a revision to their initial list, the VSA has announced the suspension of two further clubs. Vassar Headbangers, which was approved after the VSA’s mistaken assumption that it was a thrash metal appreciation club, has been suspended after Health Services confirmed that the campus was on track for a record number of concussions. Another new affinity group, Students for Destruction of Property, was shut down before it had even finished the application process, after campus security reported multiple incidents of destruction of property. Finally, in response to swirling rumors that the student body might finally petition for a Vassar Gladiators club, the VSA has made its position clear: “Don’t even think about it.”

April 8, 2021

OPINIONS

Page 11

Protect student mental health in transition to normalcy Ben Fikhman Columnist

O

n March 19, 2020, President Elizabeth Bradley sent an email launching the complete upheaval of Vassar life: in-person learning was discontinued for that remaining semester. Beyond that spring, Vassar as we knew it has not been the same.

Every student on campus had to begin relying on technology for educational access and be away from the people whom they see regularly or with whom they have formed close relationships. Some were just disappointed knowing that their approach toward maintaining a routine that balanced social life, academic life and other aspects would grind to a halt, and they had to readjust. Most importantly, however, this monumental transition was a serious blow to people’s mental health. People began to feel more lonely, more uncertain about the future, and the student body had to collectively grapple with a new means of getting by throughout the semester. Even up until now, based on the student, the COVID-19 era may be challenging, demanding and possibly even psychologically gut-wrenching.

Now we are coming upon a new transition—a transition to normalcy. In the long term, it will surely be a boost to our collective prosperity, as we can finally gather in large groups, do the same activities that we couldn’t do during the COVID-19 era and most importantly, not hurt or fear hurting our loved ones. I’m personally thrilled to see my grandparents. It is vital, however, to acknowledge that this will be a new and monumental shift. Just like the one we all underwent going into lockdown, it will be challenging. This challenge indicates why the Vassar student body and administration must prioritize the mental health of students during such a transition.

A large part of our lives during the pan-

demic did not feature seeing other people’s faces on the campus sidewalks or in the hallways. Students on campus are accustomed to simple head nods or waves without the smiles. As more students get vaccinated and the end of the pandemic appears in sight, we will once again see one another’s faces much more frequently. But while that may be a very positive thing for some, it could be a foreboding prospect for others.

People may feel self-conscious about their facial appearances, since masks have been a coping mechanism for interactions with people who are not close. Those living on campus pass by people whom they do not know, and that may even include next-door neighbors. These interactions range from hellos to head nods to no acknowledgement at all, but imagine how different from our current norm it would be if at some point, when it is deemed safe, facial coverings become unnecessary. Revealing the bottom half of the face to a consistent set of people every day can be daunting.

Wearing a mask has helped students abandon the emotional labor that comes with smiling, a reality on campus as much as in the rest of the world. As unimportant in the grand scheme of things as it may be, humans often overthink small interactions, like how they move their mouth in practicing acknowledgement. Determining when it is appropriate to smile is not easy, and masks have provided an escape. Transitioning to normalcy can be a difficult adjustment considering just how often people on campus see others whose bottom half of their faces are obscured. I suspect that this reality may resonate most with on-campus first-years who began their Vassar lives amid the pandemic.

As the goalposts in the transition to normalcy shift back and forth due to mixed health updates and occasional upticks in

COVID-19 cases, what’s encouraging is that action inside and outside of the government is being taken to charge forward. With the long awaited end to the pandemic comes jittery anticipation for one vitally important part of life—fun. From a mental health and socialization perspective, children, teenagers and young adults are among the groups most impacted by a pandemic. As a result, students may envision parties, travel, concerts and worry-free gatherings as they hear of news suggesting incoming normalcy. A galvanizing reset in social life is not only welcomed, but fantasized about. I myself am so eager to be around large groups of people comfortably and hug my closest friends.

This anticipation could, however, have unintended consequences on some students’ mental health. The reality is that not everybody on campus has the invigorating and mentally satisfying social lifestyles that they would want, and that may not change with the start of a largely COVID-19-free life. Students may find themselves underwhelmed.

A Boston Globe article asserting the need for parents to pay attention to teenagers’ mental health suggests that attempts to re-acclimate after a period of social isolation, especially for students most dependent on that aspect of growth, may be met with disappointment if the bar is not kept low. A return to normalcy could be a very slow process, and it could fail to meet people’s expectations. There is an element of social stamina that may be necessary to re-engage with others, which can be a real source of anxiety.

Our initial transition into the COVID-19 era featured a rapid restructuring of social interactions. As a result, after more than a year, flexing that social muscle as we hope to spend more time outdoors with people and engage physically with others may become exhausting and nerve-wracking.

Taking all of these realities into consid-

eration, Vassar should strengthen its mental health services for those who may need them. It is important that the administration avoid oversimplifying the manner in which the pandemic timeline affects college students. If normalcy were to reappear during a time at which students were on campus, we need to ask the important questions about how we can best facilitate interactions and changes in such a manner that will mitigate transitional side effects. The Vassar student body has suffered a deterioration in mental health during this pandemic, notably due to isolation. Now excitement and anxiety coexist in the anticipation for this new upcoming journey towards normalcy. How can the administration do its best as a guiding force in the coming months?

The College should consider the realities about transitioning to normalcy in the action that they take going forward. Being underwhelmed, self-consciousness, social anxiety and concerns caused by the student’s circumstances are valid and must be heard. I believe this can be addressed through a more direct outreach by the Vassar administration through surveys conducted on a regular basis. After all, such a course of action can also provide students with a space to reflect, while the administration uses input to zero in on how it can help students.

Vassar offers free self-care services on their website, as well as off-campus services within the community. A centralized database that includes tools to tackle concerns created by the upcoming collective transition could increase the impact of these resources. While the administration is not an all-encompassing force and cannot revolutionize students’ mental health, it can do its best to mitigate the detrimental effects of the transition by connecting on-campus, community, and online resources to the relevant guidelines.

Amidst economic collapse in Lebanon, hope dwindles Rayan El Amine Columnist

F

or a lifetime, hope was the lifeblood of the Lebanese people, a marker that—in spite of all else—our existence would remain simply because we willed it there. For a nation that was left shackled at the back of French colonialism, battered by a 15year civil war and still at its knees following generations of brain drain, hope was the only commodity in a place where the rich could eat and the poor couldn’t afford to watch. It was that existence that defined my youth, that hope that rooted itself in my consciousness.

But even hope is hard to come by these days.

Over the last month, protests that began nearly two years ago in October of 2019 have reached a point of inferno. Lebanon’s economic crisis continues to devastate its people, and the rapidly falling Lebanese pound means that with every passing day the situation becomes more dire.

Explaining how the economic crisis came to be is difficult. A confluence of factors that include local and neighboring wars, a reliance on an emigrant community that supported their families through remittances and was quickly losing its financial standing and a dysfunctional banking system pushed Lebanon and its economy to the brink. This difficulty is really part of the problem, with no real way to pinpoint exactly how this situation came to be, and most people are left to argue about what’s to blame while their households fall deeper below the poverty line.

Now, while what’s to blame remains up for what’s now become a violent debate, there is one frustrating reality that almost every Leb-

anese person agrees upon today: If it’s asses at the top of your political hierarchy, it usually means shit is falling down on you.

Lebanon’s political order looks more like a circus than a functional government. What was meant to be a parliament that was divided religiously across Lebanon’s 18 recognized sects has devolved into a ruling class that enters and exits the political sphere as it so pleases, taking with it any and all financial hope for a rebuild.

The ultimate example of this nation’s dysfunction is without a doubt the nearly 30-month span that saw the Parliament unable to elect a president. Meaning that a country that was surrounded by both civil and proxy wars, and thus in desperate need of some kind of valuable representation, was left without a leading figure from May of 2014 to October of 2016.

It’s almost hilarious to think about: a country that has produced some of the world’s most important voices led by a group of incompetent old men unaware of how to use a modern cellphone, much less run a functional government. And the thing is, for a long time, it was funny.

We made light of those situations that formalized our upbringing, joked at the fact that turning the laundry machine and the air conditioner on at the same time meant an apartment-wide blackout. These struggles defined our existence, and the incompetence said more about our affinity for survival than our desperate reality.

Unfortunately, nobody’s laughing now.

What’s crippled the country, and what continues to feel different in the contemporary context is that now even basic survival feels

like a challenge. The Lebanese pound (LBP)— initially valued at 1,500 LBP to the American dollar since 1997—has now plunged to a value at somewhere around 11,000 LBP to the dollar, an almost 700 percent decrease that saw families’ life savings decimated and the hopes they had for their children up and vanish.

In the context of this kind of vicious collapse, statistics often don’t do justice to explain just how gutting this kind of loss is. Say a family had accumulated savings of close to 100,000 dollars in Lebanese pounds across their lifetime—money that theoretically could begin to establish the kind of generational wealth necessary to continue living under government corruption. Today, that family’s life savings would be worth somewhere around 15,000 dollars.

The implications of this kind of rapid collapse are both vast and incredibly minute.

On one hand, it now means that a generation of Lebanese intellectuals with hopes of emigrating away from the wilting nation and supporting their families from the outside-in are now landlocked. See, unless a family has miraculously accumulated unimaginable wealth, their entire foundation for building any kind of life away from Lebanon is gone.

It’s no hyperbole to say that the economic effects of that kind of internal lockdown could be felt for centuries. Lebanon was defined by its emigrant population, a group strong enough to have moved away from home who now continue to support the country outside the greedy reach of its political dictators. For this new generation—my generation—that reality has been obliterated.

On a more daily and pressing level, it now means that most people don’t have the ba-

The opinions expressed above do not represent those of The Miscellany News as a whole.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

sic capacity to make it through the day. The Beirut explosion left nearly 300,000 people homeless, and now close to 60 percent of the population has fallen below the poverty line.

Hyperinflation has brought the country to its knees, with basic goods now being sold at unimaginable rates. The entire situation reads like a horrid nightmare, but it’s become the poisoned reality for what really was the world’s rose.

On a personal level, it’s nearly indescribable to express what it’s like to witness your home fall to its knees. To simultaneously feel both incredible guilt and deep gratitude that you get to exist outside the bounds of total imprisonment while the people and places you love fade to obscurity; to be nothing more than a story or a memory.

I haven’t been home in close to a year. I left a world behind that I loved and truth be told I have a hard time recognizing it even on TV, but there are moments that are seared into my consciousness. July 3, nearly a month before Lebanon’s vicious explosion, a 61 yearold man walked onto the street I grew up on and took his own life. No longer able to feed his family, he could not bear to witness his country collapse in on itself and frankly, I don’t blame him. In a painfully strange way, his death was mourned, but also understood.

He did not become a martyr in the ways revolutionaries before him did, rather—and this is particularly difficult to say—he was envied.

For so many generations, hope defined our existence, but that commodity—like food, like money, like life—has all but vanished. What we’re left with is hungry children, deceased fathers and a community that now sees death as a relief, not a tragedy.

OPINIONS

Page 12

April 8, 2021

Mainstream media ignores root cause of migrant surge Helen Johnson

I

Columnist

f you have been following the news, you have probably heard about the recent surge in asylum seekers arriving at the U.S.-Mexico border. The United States has seen an influx in migrants since President Joe Biden’s inauguration: In February, border officials encountered 18,945 family members and 9,297 unaccompanied minors. That’s an increase of 168 percent and 63 percent, respectively, from January, according to the Pew Research Center.

As of Thursday, March 18, about 4,500

“No one seems to place blame on the true culprits: The United States’ long history of interfering in Latin American governments.” unaccompanied children were being held in short-term Custom and Border Protection (CBP) facilities, and as of Wednesday, March 19, there were over 9,500 minors being housed by the U.S. Refugee Office.

These are the highest monthly levels of migrants the southern border has seen since 2019, and every major news outlet has been covering the surge. Many reporters have used the word “crisis” to describe the spike in asylum seekers or have quoted news organizations that have done so, including at CBS, NBC, the New York Times, and the Chicago Tribune. However, I have yet to read an article that attributes the “crisis” to the correct cause.

As the BBC reports, lawmakers in Washington are pointing fingers over who is to blame for the current spike in asylum seekers. The mainstream media seems fixated on this finger-pointing. CBS reports how chair of the Senate Appropriations Committee on Homeland Security, Democrat Chris Murphy, cited the “mess” Trump left for the current administration and the construction of the border wall as a failure in immigration policy. NBC News cites White House press secretary Jen Psaki placing the blame on the Trump administration. The New York Times reports on Republicans’ criticism of the Biden administration’s immigration policies.

the poverty and violence present in Latin American countries today.

The only reporting I have seen that has at least attempted to explain the “root causes” of the surge in migration is from NPR’s Up First and Morning Edition. NPR’s correspondent in Mexico City, Carrie Kahn, says, “Remember, in Guatemala, Honduras and El Salvador, you’re already dealing with high levels of violence, gangs, grinding poverty. Then two hurricanes hit the region, and then now, this year of the pandemic.” Other news outlets have briefly mentioned the high levels of poverty and violence, hurricanes and the pandemic as reasons behind the spike in asylum seekers, but chose to focus mostly on the Biden administration’s handling of the situation at the border, possible upcoming immigration legislation and the finger-pointing in Washington.

NPR notes how the Biden administration wants to spend money in the home countries of the migrants in order to attack the root causes of migration, but this aid will be conditional. When Steve Inskeep asked why these conditions are necessary, Kahn explained, “Basically because corruption is rampant and endemic in these countries. We’re talking about collusion with drug traffickers and organized crime gangs...There’s a lot of embezzlement too, personal enrichment of politicians, outright theft and misuse, and checks and balances on power there is very weak.”

But even NPR’s coverage of the “root causes” of migration is problematic.

Guatemala, Honduras and El Salvador. Although these may be accurate descriptions for conditions in many of these countries, they perpetuate negative stigmas about Central America and contribute to racist perceptions of Latin American immi-

1979 coup d’etat. Over 75,000 Salvadorans were killed while the United States supported the right-wing military forces who tortured, raped and executed left-wing insurgents. Over 85 percent of the killings, kidnappings and torture during the Salvadoran civil war were acts of the government forces trained by the United States.

An operation in December 1981 resulted in

Courtesy of Peter Haden via Wikimedia Commons. ship, and a series of U.S.-funded military and authoritarian governments followed.

These governments were characterized by violent repression of guerilla opposition and indigenous peoples in Guatemala.

The United States was directly involved in training the Guatemalan forces that

Courtesy of Southern Border Communities Coalition.

Words like “violence,” “gangs,” “corruption,” “collusion,” “drug traffickers,” “organized crime” and “embezzlement” leave the listener with an incredibly negative perception of the Latin American countries to which they are referring, including

Courtesy of Martin Leveneur via Flickr.

But no one seems to place blame on the right culprit: The United States’ long history of interfering in Latin American governments—sponsoring coups, overthrowing leaders and funding contra wars which has caused massive instability and led to

grants. They also insinuate that the blame for these conditions lies with the people and governments of Central America.

This is incorrect.

In 1954, the CIA orchestrated the coup d’etat that deposed democratically elected Guatemalan President Jacobo Árbenz. The United States then installed Carlos Castillo Armas as the head of a military dictator-

killed thousands of civilians and massacred indigenous villages. As a result of the civil war in Guatemala that followed the U.S.-orchestrated coup, 200,000 civilians were dead, economic growth was squelched and political independence gave way to corruption.

In 1914, U.S. banana companies owned almost 1 million acres of the best land in Honduras. These holdings increased to the point where Hondurans themselves had almost no access to the country’s most prosperous land. Coupled with American control of the country’s banking and mining industries, this left little hope for independent economic growth. Then, during the Reagan era, the United States stationed thousands of soldiers in Honduras in order to train the Nicaraguan “contra” rebels.

During this time the United States also pushed huge economic reforms, including deregulating the economy, which left the country vulnerable to exploitation. Then, on June 28, 2009, a United States-backed coup d’etat deposed Honduran president Manuel (Mel) Zelaya. This led to excessive violence, human rights abuses and economic servitude to the United States.

During the civil war in El Salvador in the 1980s, the United States contributed to the conflict by providing $1-2 million in aid per day to the El Salvadoran government and training death squads to target and terrorize civilians who opposed the

The opinions expressed above do not represent those of The Miscellany News as a whole.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

the El Mozote massacre, where 1,200 men, women and children were killed—one of the worst massacres in Latin American history. The Reagan administration dismissed it as “propaganda.”

The story of United States interference in Latin America does not end here. Ronald Reagan funded (illegally) the Contra War in Nicaragua in the 1980s in order to oppose the Sandinista government which had overthrown the brutal Somoza dictatorship. This led to the Iran-Contra scandal, which saw tens of thousands of Nicaraguans killed and horrific human rights abuses. In 1973 in Chile, the United States backed the military coup d’etat that ousted democratically elected socialist president Salvador Allende and instated General Augusto Pinochet. This led to 17 years of a brutal and violent military dictatorship; the torture, disappearance and murder of tens of thousands of Chileans; and an economic overhaul that has led to massive wealth inequality in the country today.

These are just a few of the instances of U.S. interference in Latin America that resulted in extreme violence, political instability and economic collapse. In many cases, without U.S. involvement and/or economic exploitation, these countries would not be facing the levels of violence and poverty present today. The migration patterns of people from Latin America— especially Central America—to the United States are a direct result of U.S. policies of imperialism and exploitation for capital gain. And yet, almost no mainstream news outlets mention this when reporting on the influx of asylum seekers at the border.

It’s time to stop villainizing Latin American countries and the people who are forced to flee their homes and attempt to cross our southern border. The mainstream media needs to acknowledge that the conditions in many of these countries are a direct result of U.S. interference, and that the United States is now simply witnessing the consequences of the upheaval, disruption and instability that it caused.

It’s time to stop perpetuating harmful narratives about the conditions in these countries without acknowledging the true root of the problem. If you’re going to focus on finger-pointing, don’t be shy; place blame where blame is due: the United States of America.

SPORTS

April 8, 2021

Page 13

A strange season for men’s volleyball, women’s tennis Continued from Sports on page 1 to their sports. For men’s volleyball, one of the biggest challenges of playing during the COVID era was always going to be fitting a three month season into two or three weeks.

When asked via email, volleyball players Andrew Kim ’23 and Matt Usui ’22 both highlighted the condensing of the season as one of their toughest hurdles. The shortening of the season means more double-headers, which can impact class and sleep schedules and result in less time to prepare for other teams. Usui also cited the restrictions on celebrating as something that was particularly hard to overcome. Yet, it seems the squad has already found ways to persevere past these hardships: They are 6-3 and currently ranked No. 4 in all of Division III, continuing their run as one of the most successful programs in Vassar’s recent history.

Although both Kim and Usui acknowledged the strangeness of the season, they remained appreciative of the chance to play even a few games. “Returning to competition with the team is a dream come true considering the circumstances,” Kim explained. The

fact that the team has found unity through the unknowns is an added bonus, Kim elaborated: “Team comradery has been developed with this team differently than I have ever seen because of these restrictions, but we face these challenges and smile (under our masks) while we enjoy this strange season.”

Usui called the season “unprecedented” and reflected, “It’s been a huge blessing, especially considering last year’s season ended prematurely. After a year of no competition, I forgot how much I love being on the court.”

Although they have only played one match so far, the women’s tennis team is also no stranger to the ebbs and flows of COVID athletics. Their first match on the docket, against Union, was postponed due to viral precautions on Union’s side, an early setback in another condensed season with only seven matches scheduled. The team was finally able to play against Ithaca this past weekend, a matchup they won 7-2, resulting in their first victory. Captain Melina Stavropoulos ’22 referred via email correspondence to the postponement of the Union match as one of the first big challenges for this season: “We

had spent the week preparing for the match, so having it postponed was difficult news to accept at first. However, the fact that we had the match postponed is a reminder that the system setup for competition is working.” She further added that it has been an adjustment to learn to play with masks on, but quipped, “Our stamina levels are off the charts now!”

Even with all the tribulations of playing a season with COVID restrictions, like Kim and Usui, Stavropoulos and teammate Sofie Shen ’24 both expressed how thankful they were to be given the chance to play again.

Shen wrote via email, “As a student-athlete, it has been really exciting to have something to work towards which I feel has brought me a greater connection to the team, more meaningful practices, and a renewed love for tennis…The return to competition has definitely brought a sense of normalcy.”

Stavropoulos addressed how enthusiastic not only her teammates but her competitors seemed to be for competition: “We were all so excited and nervous for our first match, and as we played it really felt like each and every

person on our team and on the opposition was deeply appreciative to be competing.”

While men’s volleyball plays in their conference semifinal this Friday against St. John Fisher College, women’s tennis will play in only their second match, against Skidmore, on Saturday. When Vassar decided to commit to spring competition, no one, not even the administration, really knew how this season would play out. Although COVID restrictions and precautions are no doubt extremely necessary when it comes to allowing competition of any degree, it wasn’t clear how this would affect the success of teams, on and off of the court. But if men’s volleyball and women’s tennis are any indication, even under changing circumstances and new rules, Vassar’s teams can still find success in their leagues. And rather than being sluggish and out of practice, the squads seem reenergized. In the end, it is clear that win or lose, student-athletes are just relieved to be playing again. Perhaps Usui put it best when he wrote, “COVID has made it abundantly clear that I won’t be playing volleyball forever, so I cherish each moment that I get.”

Once more, with feeling: Deshaun Watson and the NFL Ryan Mazurkewiz Guest Columnist

S

top me if you’ve heard this one before: A star NFL player is facing multiple counts of sexual assault/harassment, casting doubt on his future with the league but by no means ending his career. This time, the offender is Houston Texans’ quarterback Deshaun Watson, who at the time of this writing has a staggering 22 cases of sexual misconduct leveled against him, with new cases becoming public as recently as April 5. I won’t go into explicit details here, but I’d encourage anyone unaware to examine how Watson repeatedly assaulted massage therapists during his time in the NFL. The case, like many in the NFL’s history, is horrific and appears to show serial predatory behavior on Watson’s part. In the face of so many accusations, the question I will be examining is not one of Watson’s guilt. Another, more uncertain question looms: What is the NFL going to do about Deshaun Watson?

I’ll start in a place I wish wasn’t relevant to this conversation, but has proven a deciding factor in the fates of many NFL careers marred by misconduct: Watson’s talent. Deshaun Watson is an extremely skilled NFL quarterback. He’s arguably one of the five most gifted people in the world at the single most important position in football, making him an extremely valuable on-field asset. Unless you have someone who has received MVP votes in the past, your team would be better at football with Deshaun Watson on it.

Why does this matter? Because NFL front offices generally make two considerations in signing so-called “problem guys” to their teams. The first and most obvious one is

“Would this player potentially make our team better?” The second, a more nuanced inquiry, is “Is the team’s improvement going to be worth the PR hit we’ll take from signing this guy?” Note that this is not “Is this right?” Not “Has this guy proven he deserves a second chance?” Rather, it’s a question with a calculated risk and reward, separate from any discernible ideology or code other than that of team and league self-interest.

That doesn’t mean Watson won’t be punished—far from it. The NFL has a family friendly image to maintain, and the “football is family” commercials don’t work quite the same way when the smiling player on the screen is a known serial predator. There are no perfect comps, but while the longest suspension for gendered violence was Greg Hardy’s ten-game ban, I think Deshaun Watson will probably be suspended from the league for somewhere around the length of one season due to the mountain of accusations against him. He might even be cut by the Texans entirely. Roger Goodell will give a scripted speech about the league taking steps to improve its relationship with women. Fans, even cynical ones like myself, will want to see Goodell’s statement as genuine. After all, we’ve made great strides in very recent history! The Me Too Movement surely changed perspectives on what’s acceptable and made organizations like the NFL reflect on their actions. Right?

But then the world will keep on turning.

A year will pass. Fans will move on to the next Mahomes highlight, some dumb thing Gronk said or another rabid Bills fan subjecting themself to serious bodily harm while intoxicated enough to feel immortal. Foot-

ball will be played, teams will win and lose, and Deshaun Watson’s abuses will slowly fade from public memory into just another offseason story. When he eventually returns to play or signs with a new team, the league will roll out the second chance bandwagon, highlighting Watson’s charity work and his former role as a poster child for off field contributions. Watson will repeatedly profess his commitment to reshaping himself as a man and learning from his horrific mistakes. He might be sincere. He might be full of crap. Either way, by the time he suits up for opening day in 2022, the fans of whatever team he’s playing for will have convinced themselves he’s a changed man. Me Too didn’t alter the thought processes of the men running the NFL. It only scared them into trying a little harder to cover up their blatant immorality.

I can’t tell you what Deshaun Watson’s punishment should be beyond a temporary suspension, which he already seems likely to receive. I don’t know all the facts, and even if I did, I know that I’m not in any position to deem him worthy of a second chance or not. What I can condemn is the NFL’s decision-making process when it comes to player misconduct. I can condemn the league treating matters of abuse, assault and worse as business decisions rather than questions of character. If football is family, then act like a family. Teach your sons to respect women, because cases like Watson’s show the consequences of handing abusive men wealth and status without impressing upon them how that status can be used to hurt people.

Handing out suspensions doesn’t serve that purpose. And what’s worse, that punishment is going to be based just as much on

Answers to last week’s crossword puzzles

“Spring is here”

By Reese Collins

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By Ian Rosevear

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Watson’s talent as it is on his conduct. The fact that he’ll have been reprimanded already will give whatever team brings Watson in as their starter in 2022 plausible deniability that they really care about the character of the man leading their team, that they couldn’t do anything more than what the league has. As if they wouldn’t let Hannibal Lecter suit up if he could throw touchdowns. Punishment is codified to serve the league image alone, but it’s clear that the NFL needs to go beyond that, not only suspending players who engage in gendered violence, but also educating teams on consequences and seriously attempting to change a toxic leagewide culture with regards to gender.

Maybe this time will be different. Maybe a case against a player of Watson’s profile will actually convince the league to take proactive measures to educate their players about sexual violence and other issues of abuse. But I doubt it. Because if players [CW: the links are graphic] beating women on video, abusing children with a switch or many players being accused of rape didn’t force the league to take drastic measures to stop domestic violence, there’s no reason to think they will start now.

All those guys are talented enough to still be in the league, and the only time the above incidents are remembered by football fans is when we see a meme mocking the player.

So yeah, you’ll forgive me if I don’t hold my breath on real preventative actions taken by the league office. But hey, they’re about to do the whole disappointment and outrage bit to convince us this particular suspension is the one that’ll really change league culture, we mean it. Don’t let me stop you, Roger—take it from the top.

Page 14

CROSSWORD The Miscellany Crosswords “Physique Tune-up”

ACROSS 1. Native plains tribe 5. Sax type 9. Rate 13. Reznor of Nine Inch Nails 14. Uncommon 15. Like a yearning heart 16. Recruitment specialist 18. Mufasa's double-crosser 19. Non-Rx 20. Came up 21. Musician's manuscript 22. Type of scan 24. Begin 25. Show of deliberate dismissal 29. Airbnb competitor, in a way 32. What lies between North America and Europe, in saying 33. 401(k) alternative 34. Children's author Blyton 35. Marks for review 37. Wordsmith 38. Money maker?

39. Family clan 40. SCUBA malady, with "the" 41. Simply ideal 45. Chopin work 46. EST part 50. Use a rubber?

51. Wee bit 53. Outstanding 54. Burgles 55. Get ready to race?

57. Mighty wind 58. Of the mouth 59. Referred to

By Greg Calidonna and Ian Rosevear

60. Venerating verses 61. Just 62. Company seen on toy trucks

DOWN 1. Greek island 2. Don't just stand there 3. Purpose 4. Gasoline additive 5. Palmer with a famous drink 6. Back parts, for short 7. It may have limbs to climb 8. Jingle Bells contraction 9. Namesake of a helpful triangle 10. Weird Al's main squeeze?

11. Rented for private use 12. "Jane ___" 13. Mjölnir chevalier 17. Russian mountain range 21. Poker variety 23. Pranked with Smirnoff 24. Mama's boys 26. Bum rap?

27. Hoard, as blankets 28. Colorblind rodents 29. Warmth 30. Tripping in a car 31. Schedule 35. Bugger off 36. ___ Vegas 37. Household annoyance 39. Give up 40. Supplicate 42. Transports around town

43. With much precision 44. A pop 47. Modifies 48. Magical markings 49. Require 50. Therefore 51. Rended 52. On the level

1. Couch 5. Following 10. "We'll fix it in ____" (filmmaker's reply) 14. Greek god of sex 15. Clog remover 16. Possible Zoom audio problem 17. Steak spec 18. Dora's cousin 19. Amount of homework, in a hard class 20. *Did you mean: who is 20-across 22. "____ get it!"

23. "Wha?" 24. Reims refusal 25. Netflix show inspired by Arsène 26. Got the OK from the trainer 29. On keto 31. All better 32. Religious offshoots 33. Like 2021 34. *Did you mean: nag a ram 36. URL ender 39. Turn the key 40. Goes together well 42. Blue feeling 45. “The Searchers” genre 46. Practice repeatedly 47. Id's partner 49. Long time 50. First four letters of an Aretha hit 51. *Did you mean: my preciousss 55. "Am ____ only one here?"

56. CR-V maker

55. Additionally 56. Loll

By Reese Collins

“Google Easter Eggs” ACROSS

April 8, 2021

57. Former world no. 1 Năstase who deceives?

58. She plays Meryl's mom in the "Mamma Mia!" sequel 59. 1979 spaceship horror flick 60. Actress Fanning 61. "Bill & ____ Excellent Adventure" 62. TikTok audience, mostly 63. Partner of hide

DOWN 1. "Buona ____" (Italian greeting) 2. Televangelist, and university founder, Roberts 3. Upper part of the face 4. Last letter in LGBTQIA+ 5. Envelope dest.

6. Joey or Rachel 7. Billy Blanks’ fitness system 8. Beget 9. Chess piece involved in castling 10. Schulz's strip 11. Eight-legged inkers 12. Acts as an usher 13. Arm day goal, perhaps 21. Menace 25. "Hmmm..."

26. Stand-up Margaret 27. Type of light 28. St. Vincent Millay and Ferber 30. Start of Caesar's boast 32. Army NCO 35. Brit's cuss 36. Fabric that is French for caterpillar

37. Contraction in an anthem 38. Web portal launched same day as Windows 95 39. Some Fortnite players 41. Bedtime ritual, maybe 42. Stern 43. "We ______ World" (charity single) 44. Ran

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45. Like a plank 48. Lamp liver 51. This go-with 52. Mums' mums 53. World's longest river 54. Member of a squad at Best Buy