Misc 02.25.2021

The Miscellany News February 25, 2020

miscellanynews.org

Vassar College’s student newspaper of record since 1866 Volume 155 | Issue 1

Early uptick in COVID-19 cases leads to unease on campus Lucille Brewster News Editor

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s the Vassar community transitioned back to campus this semester in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, the number of cases spiked within the first week of students’ return. On Feb. 16, active cases were at an all time high of 36, less than a week after the last cohort of students moved into their dorms. Students who tested positive were immediately placed into isolation for their quarantine. As of Feb. 23, there are seven student active cases.

Heading into the College’s third semester in the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, administrators, staff and students alike knew that bringing everyone back to campus would pose a challenge. Despite having last semester under their belt, administrators understood even

the most comprehensive movein plan could not fully account for the pandemic’s national prevalence and the existence of new, more contagious variants.

Yet even with the expectation of a higher case load in mind, it was still jarring for the campus community to see the number of COVID-19 cases quickly spike to higher than at any point last semester.

As cases climbed in early February, many in the Vassar community expressed concern about the safety of on-campus living.

“I’ve developed a habit of checking the online dashboard as soon as I wake up to see if anything has changed,” said Susanna Shull ’23.

“I was extremely anxious a week and a half ago when the number of cases was climbing a lot each day, and I was expecting that we would be sent home,” she added.

See COVID-19 on page 3

Courtesy of Vassar College via VassarTogether COVID-19 Dashboard.

Sourdough brings flavor to pandemic Janet Song

Features Editor

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or several students on campus, sourdough bread is the perfect food for the pandemic, requiring only flour, water and patience.

And as the Spring 2021 semester starts, a few students are sharing their food with the Vassar community. Two students, Cole Crile ’22 and Weipeng Xie ’21, are hoping to spread their love of baking through their sourdough creations, as well as other baked goods.

While Crile isn’t active on social media, I first came across his bread thanks to his housemate Pedro Augusto Lima ’21, who showcased the Courtesy of Pedro Augosto Lima ’21. fluffy loaves on Facebook. When

asked when he started baking, Crile explained, “I’m originally from the Midwest, so I started with a lot of classic Midwestern foods.

I made a lot of a lot of bread and rolls and biscuits and cookies ... I find [that] a lot of the time it’s just easier to bake because I have the ingredients always lying around.

With cooking, [...] I need to get this specific thing for this dish that I’m going to make, and I’m usually not great at planning things when I go to the store.” Indeed, Lima’s photographs showcase how much Crile has perfected his loaves—they are plump and crisp on the outside, soft and bubbly on the inside.

Three days after Lima’s post, Xie

also posted sourdough-related content on Facebook. Instead of bread, however, Xie offered jars of sourdough starters that he had named Prince Edward and Varg Ratimir.

As Xie isn’t housemates with Crile, he didn’t want to start competition between him and the latter. “I figured that sourdough starter can be used in so many different ways,” said Xie. “[The beauty] about sourdough starter is [that it’s] basically a leavening agent—[a] yeast that you can incorporate into any other baked goods. So you can use sourdough starter [for] pancakes, waffles, muffins, cupcakes and cake.”

Xie himself enjoys experimentSee SOURDOUGH on page 8

Dollar Yard fights to survive during COVID-19 downturn Monika Sweeney Reporter

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hile some of us spent our break catching up on sleep, reclaiming summer jobs or counting the days until we returned to campus, Vassar students Iliana Jaime ’21, Dean Kopitsky ’22 [Full disclosure: Kopistky is a Senior Editor for The Miscellany News], Brooke Perlman ’23 and Miriam Rovin ’23 worked tirelessly to save a beloved Arlington staple: The Dollar Yard.

A small business nestled between Julie’s Restaurant and My Market, The Dollar Yard has been owned and operated by Rajesh Sehgal for the last two decades. His dream, which became a reality in 2001, was to provide Inside this issue

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Eclectic JPEGMAFIA just keeps pumping out bangers

quality and useful items, such as school supplies and toiletries, to college students on a budget. To Rajesh, The Dollar Yard is more than just a nine-to-five job: “It’s the bread and butter of my family,” he said.

Since about 80 percent of its business comes from college students, The Dollar Yard has been struggling to stay afloat since the beginning of the pandemic.

Dalia Sanoff, a close friend of Rajesh as well as an affiliate mentor and advisor of Vassar College’s Chabad Jewish Community (CJC), shared with the CJC’s board that The Dollar Yard has suffered much more than other Arlington businesses this past See Dollar Yard on page 7

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Top 5 tips for your love life...from the HUMOR impeachment trial

Courtesy of dollaroneyard.com.

13 SPORTS

Osaka v. Serena represents passing of torch on and off the court

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February 25, 2021

THE MISCELLANY NEWS Ted Chmyz Taylor Stewart Tiana Headley Dean Kopitsky Olivia Watson CONTRIBUTING EDITORS Aena Khan Jessica Moss Holly Schulman Abby Tarwater NEWS EDITORS Lucille Brewster Annabelle Wang ASSISTANT NEWS EDITORS Sara Lawler Alex Wilson FEATURES EDITOR Janet Song OPINIONS EDITOR Sawyer Bush ARTS EDITOR Meghan Hayfield ASSISTANT ARTS EDITORS Nina Ajemian Leila Raines HUMOR EDITOR Isabella Migani ASSISTANT HUMOR EDITOR Madi Donat SPORTS EDITOR Alex Eisert ASSISTANT SPORTS EDITOR Jackie Molloy SOCIAL MEDIA EDITOR Natalie Bober ASSISTANT SOCIAL MEDIA Alison Carranza ASSISTANT PHOTO EDITORS Sherry Liao Grace Rousell COPY EDITORS Jacqueline Gill Phoebe Jacoby Caitlin Patterson GRAPHICS EDITOR Juliette Pope AUDIO EDITOR Alex Barnard ASSISTANT AUDIO EDITOR Mrin Somani LIVE EVENTS CHAIRPERSON Ben Scharf BUSINESS MANAGER Emma Tanner ASSISTANT BUSINESS MANAGER Logan Hyde WEBMASTER Chloe Gjoka EDITOR-IN-CHIEF MANAGING EDITOR SENIOR EDITORS

REPORTERS COLUMNISTS

GRAPHIC DESIGNER COPY STAFF

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Monika Sweeney Francisco Andrade Karina Burnett Madison Caress Doug Cobb Rohan Dutta Nicholas Gorman Helen Johnson Xin Rui Ong Danielle Recco Massimo Tarridas Sandro Luis Lorenzo Arlene Chen Katie Gebbia Glenna Gomez Jason Han Tori Lubin Bryn Marling Claire Miller Sashinka Poor Melissa Roybal Mia Stein Reese Collins Greg Calidonna Ian Rosevear

CORRECTION POLICY The Miscellany News will only accept corrections for any misquotes, misrepresentations or factual errors for an article within the semester it is printed.

Sandro Luis Lorenzo/The Miscellany News.

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The Miscellany News is not responsible for the views presented within its Opinions pages. Staff editorials are the only articles that reflect the opinion of a two-thirds majority of the Editorial Board.

February 25, 2021

NEWS

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As semester opens, College addresses COVID-19 concerns Continued from COVID-19 on page 1 Administrators, too, expressed unease even while acknowledging the College’s positivity rate is within the range of expectations. “I am concerned for the health of each Vassar community member who contracts COVID-19, as much remains unknown about its short and long-term effects,’’ commented Director of Health Services Margot Schinella in a written statement.

While some in the Vassar community expressed concern about the College needing to use more extreme mitigation measures to slow the uptick, including shutting down, administrators say sending students home is not on the table at this point. The VassarTogether website outlines measures that would be taken in the case of an uncontrollable outbreak on campus, including requiring self-quarantine for a residential house and limiting campus access only to those with a Vassar ID. In terms of shutting down, Vassar’s plan follows statewide guidance. “An outbreak of more than 100 cases for a twoweek period would indicate that we needed to most likely move to remote study only,” explained Schinella.

In response to the amount of positive cases on campus, President Elizabeth Bradley alerted students on Feb. 15 that in-

door dining and podding, two reopening steps that were scheduled to begin on Feb. 17, were paused until reevaluation on Feb. 24.

While students received multiple email communications urging them to follow social distancing protocols and warning them of potential disciplinary action, Dean of the College Carlos Alamo-Pastrana explained in a written statement that community spread was not the reason for the uptick. “While some students have engaged in unauthorized gatherings, that has not been a significant source of the cases on campus,” he commented. “So far, our Health Service personnel attribute the majority of our cases to those contracted in home communities, or during travel.”

Despite the fact that early testing was unable to catch all cases upon students’ arrival, the planning and execution of movein was deemed a success by administrators and health officials. “We have successfully moved in more than 2,000 students, and the process has been safe and effective,” explained Alamo. Unlike last semester, students were administered rapid antigen tests upon arrival and prohibited from entering their residences until receiving a negative result.

Studies show that rapid antigen testing is not as accurate as molecular PCR test-

ing, more often producing false negative results. Especially in asymptomatic cases, an infected individual may not have enough virus in their mucus to test positive. Schinella explained that rapid testing was effective in isolating a few students who received positive results, but the majority of cases were detected by the PCR tests that were done in the days following the students’ arrival. While students had to upload proof of a test taken within three days prior to arrival, the results of that test did not necessarily need to come back by the time they moved in, leading some students to move in without having a negative PCR result from the last few days.

One factor complicating efforts to combat the spread on campus is the multiple variants of the virus currently in the US. Viruses will naturally mutate over time, and the emergence of new COVID-19 strains threatens to worsen the already uncontrolled spread in the US. Some specific variants, first found in the United Kingdom and South Africa, are more contagious than previous strains and are predicted to become the dominant strains in the US in upcoming months. The first detected case of the UK variant was confirmed in Dutchess County on Feb. 20. Because of the risk of variants, students have been encouraged to wear two masks, as

double- masking has been found to lower the risk of exposure.

As of now, it is not clear whether any of the more contagious variants are on campus. Schinella explained that the regular lab process of PCR testing does not indicate if a positive result is one of the new variants. The lab would only undergo further genomic sequencing tests if the case has concerning characteristics that would suggest it is a new variant. “We have not been made aware of any such testing being performed on our specimens to date,” she confirmed.

While cases have declined, administrators advise students not to let their guards down. “The most important tool in helping control any possible spread is the thoughtful actions and care of our students to ensure that they and their peers are doing everything possible to follow our community norms so that we can have a safe and enjoyable semester,” said Alamo.

The continued drop in cases now that students are no longer arriving on campus signals that Vassar’s protocols and the efforts of the student body will be able to mitigate the spread. “I am feeling less afraid and much more optimistic that we’ll have a whole semester on campus,” explained Shull.

Vassar employees face difficulty securing COVID-19 vaccine Alex Wilson

Assistant News Editor

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s obstacles to efficient vaccine distribution have created statewide chaos, Vassar has found itself unable to advocate for its employees, leaving many of them on their own in the mad scramble to get vaccinated.

Two months since the first COVID-19 vaccines were rolled out in the US, about 10 million New Yorkers—approximately half of the state’s population—have become eligible to receive the vaccine. Yet, the high hurdles of distribution reveal a more complicated story. Statewide, under 1.1 million second doses have been administered, meaning that only about six percent of residents are fully vaccinated. Things didn’t seem to be looking up this past weekend, when New York City reported that they had fewer than 1,000 first doses on hand amidst distribution delays related to the winter storm.

In an email sent before the start of the semester, President Elizabeth Bradley said that Vassar had been “actively advocating to gain access” to the state’s vaccine supply, prompting questions as to whether the school would have a role in the vaccination of the campus community. But more recently, Vice President of Communications Amanita Duga-Carroll clarified via email that, as of right now, there is no state provision allowing the College to obtain vaccines for or fast-track its employees.

Currently, student-facing employees are eligible for vaccinations, and some have already been able to receive doses.

Yet with Vassar powerless to intervene in the state-controlled process and a supply shortage that Duga-Carroll acknowledged had created scheduling challenges, employees have generally been left to fend for themselves—indicating that their only substantial help was receiving general informational resources from the college.

It was on Jan. 11 that New York State health officials first announced that in-person college instructors were eligible to re-

ceive vaccines. At this point, Professor Lisa Lowrance of the Mathematics Department was only able to get an appointment for March 9, almost two whole months later. Lowrance added that both she and her husband, also a professor at Vassar, had been “obsessively” refreshing their internet browsers in the minutes before scheduling opened, but only her husband was able to book an appointment in Dutchess County. “There’s very few appointments in the county,” she explained, “they were gone in twenty seconds.”

“‘There’s very few appointments in the county... they were gone in twenty seconds.’”

Lowrance knows of others having to drive to Binghamton, two-and-a-half hours away, or even Potsdam, not far from the Canadian border, to get their vaccines.

“I just don’t see everyone being able to get a vaccine this semester,” she acknowledged.

Despite these difficulties, Lowrance understands Vassar’s inability to step in during the process, noting that “Everybody’s a little bit worried about getting in trouble for doing anything that isn’t quite right.” With so many high-risk groups scrambling for vaccines, the exercising of institutional authority could easily be seen as having negative ethical consequences.

Professor Chris Grabowski of the Drama Department, despite having already received both doses of the Moderna vaccine, had a similarly difficult experience with the scheduling process. Finding appointments around Poughkeepsie was fruitless, he explained, and with many open slots disappearing in the time it took to fill out

his information, he was online for a number of hours trying to book an appointment. Eventually, he was able to get his hands on a slot for the following week—but had to go all the way to Coney Island Hospital in Brooklyn.

Grabowski still had a more hopeful perspective on the ability of Vassar’s employees to get vaccinated. “We in the Drama Department have been pretty proactive about getting the vaccine,” he said, explaining that several of his colleagues have already gotten the second dose, or are getting it soon.

As for whether the eventual vaccination of professors will change teaching plans for the semester, it’s a mixed bag.

Lowrance pointed out that at least one of her colleagues in the Math Department plans to switch to in-person teaching after being vaccinated, but added that the path back to this kind of instruction is a long one.

First, without many available classrooms capable of allowing all students to socially distance—especially for a department like math, where classes tend to be larger—simply finding a physical space is a significant roadblock. In Lowrance’s own class, her weekly workshopping time involves a level of interaction between students that is not possible while maintaining social distance.

Solving this sort of issue would require students to be vaccinated, meaning that Lowrance’s own vaccination wouldn’t solve the problem.

Grabowski seemed to echo this sentiment, indicating that his own vaccination hasn’t done much to influence his planning. This semester, he’s teaching in-person and double-masking, and says that the biggest change he plans to make two weeks after his second dose is to simply stand further away from his students while switching to a single mask. Grabowski emphasized that “I don’t want to be cavalier about it,” and that he will continue to be tested.

While the state works to continue what has so far been a slow rollout, Grabowski hopes to see the college be more inclusive

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

towards faculty and staff in regards to testing.

As Duga-Carroll explained, employees with the highest levels of student contact, such as dining and custodial workers, are given access to voluntary on-campus testing. Some, like Lowrance, in her capacity as a house fellow, are required to be tested every two weeks. But for others, like

“...the lack of testing pokes a hole in the campus bubble.”

Grabowski, testing is a more difficult endeavor.

“We’re encouraged to do it, we’re not required to do it, and it’s actually hard to schedule. There aren’t a lot of appointments available,” Grabowski said. He recognizes that the College is struggling and that testing carries a financial burden, but at the end of the day, he explains that the lack of testing pokes a hole in the campus bubble.

While the Vassar community looks forward to an eventual return to normalcy, the administration is waiting to hear back on the status of their application to become a vaccination site, which would serve any New Yorker in eligible categories, not just Vassar employees. In the meantime, Duga-Carroll reminds us: “We will continue to be guided by science, and public health guidelines. We are in regular conversation with local and federal public health officials, and re-evaluate protocols based on those conversations continually.”

Representatives from Dining Services and Facilities Operations were contacted but did not provide comments.

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February 25, 2021

Annual Black History Month Keynote Address goes virtual Annabelle Wang

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News Editor

n Monday evening, Feb. 15, Vassar’s Black Students’ Union (BSU) and the ALANA Center hosted their annual Black History Month Keynote Address, for the first time over Zoom. Close to 200 Vassar students and faculty members logged on to attend the event and celebrate the history of the African diaspora together virtually.

The address, entitled “The Pandemic and Black Lives Matter: How Young People Are Building a New Normal,” featured The Cut’s Editor-in-Chief Lindsay Peoples Wagner. The event was moderated by the Director of the ALANA Center Kevin Collins, BSU co-chair of the Political Education Committee Chelsea Quayenortey ’22 and BSU co-historian Kiah Matherson ’22.

Matherson commenced the program with a reading of her own poem, called “The Black Print.” Collins followed up with a brief introduction to Peoples Wagner and explained why the members of BSU and the ALANA Center selected her to be the 2021 keynote speaker.

This past year’s events—such as the COVID-19 pandemic and the resurrection of the Black Lives Matter Movement incited by the deaths of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor—made this year’s Black History Month particularly prescient. “It was important to BSU and to the ALANA Center to bring a voice that could speak to the specific times we are in. And I think we selected the perfect person to do so,” Collins said.

In 2018, Peoples Wagner was appointed as the Editor-in-Chief of Teen Vogue at the age of 29, making her the youngest, as well as the third Black, Editor-in-Chief of any Condé Nast publication. Peoples Wagner assumed the Editor-In-Chief position at The Cut this year. Collins relished the opportunity to welcome the accomplished editor. “Sharing her own personal and professional experiences, branding savvy and leadership expertise, Peoples Wagner will provide honest, authentic advice that not only inspires, but will give us the tools to take action,” he said.

Peoples Wagner then opened her address with her personal life mantra, “inclusivity being the lens in which we see everything.” This is a refrain that guides all her work.

She remarked, “There are a lot of people who have been able to have a seat at the table. I think what has changed things… is really having that seat at the table but also then shaking the table and making changes and actually using that table so that you can push things forward.”

When she was appointed Editor-in-Chief of Teen Vogue, she wanted to ensure she used her position to change the fashion industry for the better and strive for racial inclusivity. Peoples Wagner proceeded to recount her early encounters with racism in the industry when she started out as a fashion editor at The Cut. She recalled one photoshoot she had with Emmy-nominated actress and writer Issa Rae in 2016. When Peoples Wagner tried to reach out to luxury brands for clothing and jewelry, they refused to lend any of their products because Rae did not fit their brand.

“It was a really big moment for me, personally,” said Peoples Wanger. “All these brands say they’re so woke, they say they care, they say they care about diversity.

But then when it came to me shooting a Black woman who is doing incredible things, it’s like, she’s not our aesthetic.”

The presenter then spoke about her most critically-acclaimed work “Every-

where and Nowhere: What it’s really like to be black and work in fashion.” In this article, Peoples Wagner interviewed and collected over 100 narratives from Black professionals who held mid- to senior-level positions in the fashion industry, revealing the daily struggles faced by even managerial-level Black professionals.

Peoples Wagner recalled the fear she had prior to publishing the piece: “This was really scary … There were so many senior Black people who…warned me that I would be blacklisted…if I wrote a piece like this because it was too honest and it was too transparent of what was happening in the industry.”

Still, she is glad to have published the piece because it “led to so many conversations of ‘Okay, this is not just a moment in time. How do we make this a movement?

How do we actually change the industry?’”

One way she has been trying to create systemic change in the fashion industry is through the Black in Fashion Council (BIFC). Spurred to action by her professional experiences and the deaths of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor, Peoples Wagner co-founded BIFC with public relations specialist Sandrine Charles to set a new standard for inclusivity in the fashion industry. The council is intended to promote accountability and transparency among brands that elect to be a part of the coalition. When a company decides

Lindsay Peoples Wagner, the speaker at the event, became Editor-in-Chief of Teen Vogue at age 29, making her the youngest ever Editor-in-Chief of any Condé Nast publication.

Annabelle Wang/The Miscellany News. long overdue. It really is an industry-wide standard to really see how we can really put those policies into practice.”

Peoples Wagner’s presentation was followed by a Q&A session during which she answered a variety of questions from both the moderators and the audience. The ex-

“All these brands say they’re so woke, they say they care... But then when it came to me shooting a Black woman who is doing incredible things, it’s like, she’s not our aesthetic.” to partner with BIFC, they are obligated to work with the council for three years to ensure substantial change is made. As of now, over 100 brands have signed up to be a part of BIFC. To hold brands accountable, BIFC has established a Corporate Equity Index, which is a new set of industry-wide standards for beauty brands. For example, all beauty editors are required to have extensive knowledge about Black beauty in addition to European cosmetic standards.

Peoples Wagner concluded, “What we’re really trying to do with that Corporate Equity Index is challenge a lot of these really important things that I think are

change covered a variety of topics ranging from activism during the 21st century and career advice to her current favorite Black-owned businesses.

At one point, she candidly spoke about the trials and tribulations she faced during her journey in fashion journalism. She reflected that ever since college, her life has always been “about the hustle.” She detailed her first time interning with Teen Vogue, during which she was paid $9 per hour and had to work three other jobs to stay afloat.

This particularly resonated with Quayenortey. In an interview with The Miscellany News, she shared, “For

Vassar’s BSU and the ALANA Center virtually host their annual Black History Month Keynote Address featuring Editor-in-Chief at The Cut Lindsay Peoples Wagner (bottom left). The program was moderated by Director of the ALANA Center Kevin Collins (top left), BSU co-chair of the Political Education Committee Chelsea Quayenortey ’22 (top right) and BSU co-historian Kiah Matherson ’22 (bottom right).

Annabelle Wang/The Miscellany News.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Black women, Black students, especially low-income Black people, you can’t survive in the fashion industry without having two, three, four jobs on the side.

There’re so many of us who have these talents, aspirations and these goals to make it in the industry...but we can’t for no other reason except socioeconomic injustices.” Quayenortey continued, “That really hit for me because it’s not just specific to the fashion industry but it’s every other industry.”

Further on in the Q&A, Peoples Wagner explained how she is thankful to have obtained the position she is in now because she is able to “readily make culture and not chase it.”

Towards the end of the discussion, Peoples Wagner provided young people in the audience, specifically young people of color, with some career advice. She advised burgeoning professionals to be “less thirsty for the attention, less thirsty for how it looks on social media, because if you are hungry to do the work, all that other stuff will come.”

After the event, many attendees expressed their appreciation for the program despite it not being in person.

BSU Secretary Jade Smith ’21 reflected on the broader importance of such Black History Month celebrations as the Keynote Address: “Black History Month is important for America, especially in our politically charged time of police brutality and mass incarceration, two traumas that deeply impact Black people.” She continued, “Black History Month is especially needed on Vassar’s campus. Vassar needs more Black people, from Black students to Black professors. And it needs to highlight the Black students and professors we do have on this campus, who are putting in the work year-round to create better relationships amongst Black people.”

Vassar’s BSU and ALANA Center will continue their virtual celebration of Black History Month with more events in the coming weeks. On Feb. 26 at 10:30 a.m.

EST, the ALANA Center will be co-hosting a virtual lecture on health disparities affecting communities of color with an emphasis on how COVID-19 has impacted Black communities disproportionately.

BSU will be hosting a poetry reading and Q&A featuring accomplished Afro-Latina poet Dr. Raina Leon and 2020 Ruth Lilly Poetry Fellow Luther Hughes on Feb. 26 at 5 p.m. EST.

February 25, 2021

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Rick Owens’ Fall Winter 2021 exudes aggression, simplicity Massimo Tarridas

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Columnist

ggression runs in Rick Owens’ blood. He describes his younger self as arrogant, alcoholic and aromantic, and his collections periodically revel in this state. For his menswear Fall Winter 2021 show “Gethsemane,” Owens has pared down his typical looks in order to better explore a side of anger that functions on a primitive level. The show’s title references the garden where Jesus agonized the night before his crucifixion and for Owens, Gethsemane is an analogy for our reality, where we nervously await some kind of resolution to our own agony. These connections are represented via the overwhelming use of olive colored garments as the sole contrast to his normally black and white palette, as the Biblical garden is notable for its olive groves.

The particular shade simultaneously evokes a militaristic connotation of overarching violence.

In an interview with Steff Yotka for Vogue Runway, Owens worries about the timeliness of the theme of aggression, since the collection premiered just a few weeks after the insurrection at the U.S. Capitol and just two days after Joe Biden’s inauguration.

“Aggression can also be kind of a joyful release… this time, I was more disturbed.”

The examination of his own aggression—his menswear shows are self-described as autobiographical and critical, while his womenswear shows are all about appreciation and respect—has incidentally become a deconstruction of the past four years of male hostility. He clarifies that because his menswear shows are autobiographical, they have always included some element of defiance, and though “aggression can also be kind of a joyful release…this time, I was more disturbed,” referencing the riot. Of course, the collection was designed far before the events on Jan. 6, but the root of his horror started with the fact that the election was not won in a landslide, and that in itself is terrifying enough.

But not all of Owens’ concerns with aggression are political. The Ramones’ simplistic punk energy pervades his collaboration with Converse, calling back to the revelation of attitude that the band represented for so many teenagers when they debuted. For fans, it is a moment of resolution, as years ago Owens designed both a parody and homage to the iconic sneaker which he dubbed “Ramones.” The shoes have since become one of his most popular designs.

Along the same lines Owens has said that he has included more “regular guy clothes” in the new collection, both in an effort to be more inclusive and to draw attention to a sense of raw minimalism.

Yet this is all prefabricated context. What do the actual garments say? Unfortunately, not that much. Being Rick Owens, it’s by no means bad or boring, but in trying to include those more regular-guy clothes, he also undid what makes him such a special designer and such a special designer for men in particular. Many of the looks are built on classic skin-tight jeans, relatively inoffensive bomber jackets and tighty whities. Even

though these are adorned with pentagrams, they also represent just about the most basic piece of clothing there is. Womenswear runway shows have historically been spaces for wild, imaginative and beautifully impractical creations. The catwalk becomes a theatre. Menswear runway shows are typically relegated to variations of the classics: the suit, a t-shirt, pants and shoes. There is no Iris Van Herpen for men; the closest that we have to her is usually Rick Owens.

Some of my favorite moments of pure spectacle are from his Spring Summer (SS) 2019 “Babel” collection. The model looked like he had crashed into a goth tent, and the tent had become a part of him; or from that same show, where another model stepped out wearing Birkenstocks-turned-boots, a skirt cut from the baggiest jeans imaginable and a wraparound mask that sprouted long glittery tentacles from his mouth. As long as I’m referencing his past designs—especially those that scream belligerence and flamboyance—Owens’ SS2014 “Vicious” had an Estonian hardcore band play a ten-minute song with an ever-increasing tempo.

The whole time, the band’s two drummers were strapped, along with their drum sets, to a wheel spinning perpendicular to the ground. And halfway through, the singer and the three other guitar players were swung by their feet upwards to hang and play their instruments upside down for the rest of the show. That is what I would call an act of truly bitter, cathartic and playful aggression.

Despite this, the show does have its moments. There’s a particular hooded coat whose sleeves end in gloves, which holds several layers of meaning. It has zippers running down the bicep and forearm, giving the wearer the choice of using the gloves or not, a reference to the constant shift between

“What do the actual garments say?

Unfortunately, not that much.” the presence and absence of human touch nowadays. The tip of the gloves’ index finger and thumb is also cut off, a reference to our obsession with a contemporary design ethic that prioritizes technology over all else.

And there’s something about the structure and length of the garment that also gives the timely feeling of a hazmat suit. Another amazing addition are the thigh-high “wader” boots, which were featured in the SS2021 Womenswear collection. This time, they have been reupholstered in olive colored fur. The chunky platform and clear plastic heel give the appearance of hooves, and at a glance they transform the wearer into a satyr. These boots are so transformative and so fantastical that they almost make up for the lack of innovation elsewhere.

Rick Owens has never made a collection that inspires true apathy. Considering his track record, I doubt he ever will. Nevertheless, FW21 “Gethsemane” has proved to be somewhat disappointing, as even though it claims to be aggressive, it’s his past work that really bites the audience. This one just pretends to.

Rapper JPEGMAFIA unveils more hidden gems on ‘EP2!’

Ben Scharf

Live Events Coordinator

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t the start of every show, JPEGMAFIA unassumingly walks out on stage. He plugs his computer in, checks the mic and presses play. A deluge of chaotic beats and soul-bearing screams ensues. No DJ, no hype man, no reinforcements to back him up when breathless. “I’m alone when I’m at my best,” he asserts at the beginning of his new track, “FIX URSELF!”. The singularity of JPEG’s genius endures on his newest release.

While sonically sweeter than last year’s “EP!,” “EP2!” features some of his most ruthlessly indicting lyrics to date.

JPEG remains humble when discussing the vastness of his creativity. During an interview with fellow artist James Blake he explained, “I made 93 songs [(for my last record]) and whittled it down to 18, but it’s just an arbitrary number. I didn’t mean to make a bunch of tracks for no fucking reason, I just like making music.” This compulsive creativity has made JPEGMAFIA one of the most prolific rappers of the last five years.

Fans always anticipate the next opportunity to sneak a peek at the cards Peggy holds so tightly to his chest. Most all of them are aces.

JPEGMAFIA has carved out a signature sonic space as a producer and a puckish lyrical personality to boot. Industrial bangers off of 2018’s “Veteran” such as “Baby I’m Bleeding” contrast with more pop-palatable tracks like “Jesus Forgive Me, I Am A Thot” off of 2019’s “All My Heroes Are Cornballs.”

While his music transverses genres, JPEG’s inventive song structures and bravado tie all of his projects together.

JPEG has refused to slow down, following up his last LP with a span of singles and smaller projects. November brought the release of “EP!,” Peggy’s first compilation of loose tracks. The charmingly self-deprecating single “BALD!” embraced his receding hairline, while denouncing the online lyric jockeys misquoting his bars on Genius, the most authoritative online archive of song lyrics. “COVERED IN MONEY!” flexed androgynous fashion choices over a disorienting beat:“I’m covered in money, I’m out for the bag/ I flew out the country, borderline dressin’ in drag.”

The salacious Tommy Genesis feature on “ROUGH 7” was also a highlight. Bubbly add libs garnish playing bars, such as “He put a tongue to my halo/ I talk to God and She calls me emo.”

This newest installment of tracks continues to showcase JPEG’s self-assured lyricism, but over more refined and understated production. EP2! opens with the track “LAST DANCE!,” originally released as a single in August. His references are pointed and present. Joseph R. Biden, Osama Bin Laden and “Love Island” are all mentioned in a dizzying first verse. Powerful horns reminiscent of Waka Flocka Flame garnish the beat. “Are you triggered or just weak by design?” he asks his critics.

Another EP2! standout, “FIX URSELF!”, is one of JPEG’s sweetest, most sentimental songs to date. The synthetic horns from the opening track reprise as Peggy professes love for both his partner and his fan base.

The hook is catchy and uplifting. The lines “Shoutout my refugees, my fans my family” are earnest. The next track “KELTEC!” fea-

tures beautifully subtle production, to bolster lyrics that flaunt independence in an increasingly corporate industry: “Rappers can’t do what I do ‘cause I own all my shit/ And I do all my shit and most y’all can’t relate.” JPEG is surely the sole proprietor of his sound, releasing whatever he wants, whenever he wants.

“THIS ONES FOR US!” marks the climax of “EP2!”, with a litany of shots fired at critics trying to profit off of the artist’s vibrant persona (present company included).

JPEG pulls no punches, gunning for overeducated bohemian layabouts and hipster Brooklynites.

Jabs at the over-intellectualizing world of music critique give me pause; I start to reevaluate my authorial motivations. Is this

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

review at all meaningful, or merely mental masturbation? Peggy’s pen forces me to stop and acknowledge the semi-solipsistic activity of music, if only for a moment, before shamelessly continuing.

JPEG’s principled indictment of Pitchfork and similar publications is bold, but by no means out of character for the artist.

The chaotic and carefree energy we’ve come to expect from JPEG’s performances maintain throughout “EP2!,” only concentrated and channeled through the tip of his pen.

More of the same is all that we need from JPEGMAFIA right now. His prolific and enthralling discography continues to expand, sans growing pains. Fans have yet to be let down, and don’t expect to be disappointed anytime soon.

JPEGMAFIA performs at Sled Fest 2019 in Calgary. Canada.

Courtesy of Levi Manchak via Wikimedia Commons.

ARTS

Page 6

February 25, 2021

‘About Time’: New single balances musical and lyrical duality Nina Ajemian

“A

Assistant Arts Editor

bout Time” by Ronan Sidoti ’23 is a song that sneaks up on you. Starting quietly, the track opens with drums that beat like a heart. A bouncy synth line meets the drums, and the bassline anchors the blossoming sound as Sidoti begins to sing. There’s a softness to his voice, while lower harmonies add contrasting friction and depth to the vocals. Released on Jan. 25 with a music video, the single is undeniably catchy, but also far more layered than its playfulness may imply.

On a Wednesday afternoon, I sat down (on the floor of the Old Bookstore) with Sidoti to dive into his song. “About Time” is rooted in duality and a contrast between music and lyric. Sidoti elaborated, saying: “I always want to make music that, you know, my friends can hang out to and vibe to. So the inspiration was just…a feeling of moving on with things, yet also holding a grudge...I’m always attracted to songs that do both—give a message that’s twisted in a weird way.”

The warmth and weightlessness of Sidoti’s guitar, drums and synth play against relatable, grounded lyrics: “Hey, it’s about time/ To get on where I’m going and leave you behind.” This profound realization is not inherently good or bad; it simply is. Sidoti takes a big moment and simplifies it. This is life, and moments like these hurt, but they also heal.

Sidoti’s musical upbringing is similar to that of many others: His parents forced him to learn piano when he was six. And, as others with the same experience may understand, he saw piano as a chore rather than something enjoyable. But Sidoti’s perspective about music shifted when he was ten: “I played Beatles Rock Band on the Wii for the first time and it blew my mind.” Soon after, Sidoti began learning drums, followed by bass and guitar, fully immersing himself in music.

Citing influences like Phoebe Bridgers, Tame Impala, Arctic Monkeys and

John Mayer, Sidoti described his sound as “guitar-centered, sort of feel-good music,” while emphasizing that he’s still discovering his style. All of the instruments

walking to the water on the west side of Manhattan. And I don’t know, just watching people...putting an unfinished piece of a demo maybe in my headphones and

Cover art for Ronan Sidoti’s ’23 single, “About Time.” Courtesy of Ronan Sidoti ’23. on the track are played by Sidoti himself, walking around the city and sort of listenan occurrence born out of quarantine ing to what pops into my head.” but one that ultimately makes his music A moving image—encasing yourself in more personal. a world of your own words and music, “About Time” was similarly shaped by while wandering through a much bigthe spaces Sidoti occupies at home in New ger, louder world. Both comforting and York City. He explained: “I wrote most solitary, this is another instance of the of this song looking out of my bedroom conflicting and coexisting ideas present window…Lately I’ve been getting inspired throughout Sidoti’s work. He discussed by just walking—when I’ve been home the often solitary nature of songwriting,

noting, “[I]t’s always been a really isolated process for me, and I was like if I’m gonna do this music thing it’s gonna be by myself…[But] over break I was able to work with a few producer friends of mine in the city, and we were able to make some fun stuff and it sort of opened my eyes to what you can do together with people.”

This collaboration prompted Sidoti to become more involved in Vassar’s music community as well, as he is starting a band this semester.

For the “About Time” music video, Sidoti worked with friend and previous collaborator Ian Herz ’23 to bring their shared vision to life. Herz has been shooting music videos for around four years. Over Zoom we chatted about this project. “We kind of just had pieces that came together,” Herz explained, when describing the process of creating the video. “We knew we wanted a green screen bit, we knew the panda had to be in there. I wanted some match cut weird stuff, and so I mean it really just came down to going line-by-line, sort of just figuring out what we wanted to do for that particular lyric.”

Herz and Sidoti shot the music video over four days and edited the project over Zoom. Sidoti noted, “Someone said to me that it’s sort of like a love letter to Vassar.”

The video follows Sidoti all around campus, where he keeps running into a mysterious panda-masked person as he tries to escape conflict, stemming from both a rocky relationship and conflict within himself. Herz shared his interpretation of the video: “I sort of thought of it as, you know, Ronan was kind of growing as a person...We kind of thought [the panda was a symbol of] maybe his demons or a bad breakup or something.”

At the end of my conversation with Sidoti, he mentioned that this was his first time being interviewed, a remark that stuck with me. I think that this will be the first of many interviews to follow. Sidoti’s future is wide open, and it’s about time that he steps into it.

‘The Invisible Life of Addie Larue’ explores immortality, solitude Leila Raines

I

Assistant Arts Editor

set a goal for myself at the beginning of the new year: to read at least 50 books by the end of it. While, according to my Goodreads account, I am already three books behind schedule (oops) I started my reading challenge off strong with a book that had flooded my social media feeds over the break.

Wherever I turned, I saw the black and gold cover, and it became instantly recognizable whenever I came across it, even though I had never even read it: V. E. Schwab’s “The Invisible Life of Addie Larue.”

The book follows the story of the eponymous character as she navigates an immortal life. Before her immortality, she

“With one plot twist, I can feel the clock ticking within the story....”

lived in a small village in France in the 1700s. Early on, Addie’s desire for freedom and independence becomes apparent as she grapples with her limiting role as a woman of her time. As she powerlessly watches her friends marry and her family start arranging her own marriage, she desperately looks for a way to escape the gridlock. This desperation culminates on the day of her wedding as she flees before she even reaches the altar. She encounters a god of darkness in the woods into which she fled and immediately strikes a deal with the deity, trading her soul for the independent life she never got to have: “‘I want a chance to live. I want to be free … I want more time.’”

The darkness takes her desire for freedom and grants her immortality. But Addie soon realizes that her immortality comes with a heavy cost. She discovers that everyone she encounters will forget about her as soon as she leaves their sight. In the turn of a page, Addie loses all of the people from her past life. None of her friends recognize her. Her parents treat her as a stranger, kicking her out of the house in which they raised her.

Despite how unhappy she was before, Addie is even more miserable in her new circumstances. Her curse leaves her with the crushing weight of solitude and isolation, which her immortality only aggra-

vates. For decades, Addie struggles with the limits of her curse, learning how to survive and cope with the loss of relationships with her loved ones. She is stuck in a cruel cycle of meeting and falling in love with people who are bound to forget about her. However, after three hundred years of loneliness, in which her only lasting relationship is with the god who cursed her,

“She is stuck in a cruel cycle of meeting and falling in love with people who are bound to forget about her.” she finally meets someone who remembers her name.

The story features moments from Addie’s past, starting from the eighteenth century, told alongside her present-day story in New York in 2014. While time

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

jumps back and forth, the two storylines weave together to showcase Addie’s growth and strength throughout the centuries.

Although I usually don’t read historical fiction, Addie’s story had an emotional grip on me for all four hundred pages of the novel. With every person she connects with, the crushing disappointment Addie feels every time they forget her bleeds through the pages. I held on to Addie’s hope that at least one of them would remember who she was. And when one finally does, I felt like I was releasing a breath of relief alongside Addie, as the devastating weight of her eternal loneliness was finally lifted off of her shoulders.

One of the most captivating parts of the novel was the way Schwab masterfully manipulates time. With Addie’s immortality, time seems to stretch on forever, limitless.

But with one plot twist, I can feel the clock ticking within the story, every flip of the page stealing precious seconds away from the characters. Time’s flexibility and unrelenting presence especially resonated with me because I read the book over the long winter break, when time seemed the most distorted to me.

The engrossing story, combined with Schwab’s beautiful, lyrical writing, reignited my love for reading, a passion that had been overshadowed by a long, stressful fall semester.

February 25, 2021

FEATURES

Page 7

Students help beloved local business adapt to pandemic Continued from Dollar Yard on page 1 year because it is primarily set up to meet the needs of college students.

In an effort to help this business recover from significant losses, Sanoff connected Rajesh with the aforementioned Vassar students to create a website for his store.

In approving this project, the CJC board provided tremendous support to a local POC-owned business, while also making it more accessible for Vassar students to safely purchase affordable products during the COVID-dictated school year.

Rovin, CJC Social Justice Chair, was the driving force behind this project. Beginning in early December, Rovin and Rajesh collaborated to build and design a website from the ground up. Since this was Rovin’s first time creating a website, there

“As of Jan. 31, students are now able to place, pay for and pick up orders from The Dollar Yard on the same day.”

proved to be a large learning curve. However, she attributes her success to having Sanoff and other CJC board members to share ideas with. While the website was in development, Rajesh continued to offer his support to the endeavor in any way possible and emphasized how grateful he was to continue doing business with Vassar students. “I am so thankful to the students who, within their own resources, built a website for me so that I could survive,” he expressed. After four weeks of hard work and collaboration, dollaroneyard.com was launched on Jan. 31.

As of Jan. 31, students are now able to place, pay for and pick up orders from The Dollar Yard on the same day. Orders are hand delivered by Rajesh in the parking lot between the Deece and Noyes. This free delivery system runs every Monday through Friday from 6 to 7 p.m. While dollaroneyard.com has all the store’s usual products such as school supplies, dorm decorations, over the counter medicines, personal hygiene products and the coveted campus clout items (i.e.: pink and blue b*tch hats), Rajesh has expanded his inventory based on students’ current needs.

His stock now includes face masks, hand sanitizer and disinfecting wipes. Even though the website has been up and running smoothly for nearly a month, Rovin continues to regularly upload new inventory online.

Rovin’s social media posts about the launch have been flooded with likes, comments and reposts. Slowly but surely, the overwhelmingly supportive community

response on social media has translated into an increase in sales for The Dollar Yard. Both Rajesh and Rovin have been thrilled with the new website’s function and layout. Their hope is that this platform will serve as a catalyst for more purchases in the future. “This business is [Rajesh’s] livelihood and being able to contribute to its stability and success,

“To Rajesh, The Dollar Yard is more than just a nine-to-five job: ‘It’s the bread and butter of my family,’ he said.” even in just a small way, has been such a privilege,” said Rovin.

Sadly, The Dollar Yard is still far from being saved. While the website’s first few sales were extremely exciting for both Rajesh and the students involved in this project, the financial toll that this pandemic and the closing of campus took on The Dollar Yard is nearly irreversible.

However, with every online sale, the

store is one step closer to keeping its doors open another day. Instead of instinctively buying from exploitative companies such as Amazon, students are being offered a much better alternative in supporting The Dollar Yard, a pillar of the community. Plus, nothing beats same day delivery right to campus. “I’ve seen that line by the mailroom, no one wants to wait in that,” Kopitsky joked.

Like other students who have taken advantage of The Dollar Yard’s free delivery service and acceptance of Arlington Bucks, Grace Skakel ’24 reported nothing short of exceptional service when she placed an order for tea, chocolate, school supplies and mouthwash. Although Rajesh was sold out of the type of tea she wanted, he wrote a kind email apologizing and promising to let her know when it would be back in stock. Skakel said of the interaction, “It was really sweet and beyond what I expected.”

Rajesh and the CJC team hope that the Vassar College community will continue to support The Dollar Yard online now that in-person interactions are no longer possible for the foreseeable future. Kopitsky warns, “It’s really important that folks use this website or The Dollar Yard is going to be one of the many casualties of COVID-19.” While creating a website for The Dollar Yard is just one of the many steps necessary to keep this Arlington staple alive, it is a crucial one. Hopefully, this website will breathe new life into a business Rajesh has poured his heart and soul into for the past 20 years.

Local Thai restaurant Pad Mango doesn’t disappoint—or enthrall Olivia Gross

Guest Columnist

I

recently ordered dinner from Pad Mango, a local restaurant that offers a variety of Thai and Asian cuisine.

noodles to have the attention it deserves in every bite. The sweet plum sauce provided a tangy contrast. Still, the rolls were not particularly remarkable or memorable. Perhaps a more nuanced flavor combination or a crispier wrapping would have improved the experience.

The pork and shrimp dumplings were artfully wrapped like little baskets with an impressive filling-to-wrapper ratio. Plum sauce rendered each bite more tasty. If you’re a fan of meat dumplings, these are worth trying.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t try the massaman curry due to the no-food sharing guidelines. It was reported to lack the richness of a truly excellent curry, but still made a hearty, satisfying and generously portioned entree.

Now, the staple of any Thai restaurant: pad thai. The bright orange color, reminiscent of shockingly bright Cheeto dust, suggested that this was an Americanized interpretation, as more traditional pad thai is

“The pork and shrimp dumplings were artfully wrapped like little baskets with an impressive paperto-filling ratio.” browner from the tamarind. The portion could provide dinner for three people or plenty of leftovers. I’d recommend the former, though, because it did lose much of its initial flavor after being reheated in a microwave. The bean sprouts and lime decorating the dish provided a nice crunch and acidity.

The menu offers a good selection of traditional Thai dishes, with a vegetarian option for almost every item. Most of the entrees range between $10 and $15. I sampled a number of the most popular dishes, including the vegetable spring rolls, shrimp and pork dumplings, and pad thai with chicken, while a friend tried the massaman curry. The portions are generous; my pad thai has been taking up a chunk of my trusty fridge, making for upwards of three meals.

The spring rolls were crunchy, but not overly fried, allowing the warm, salty and comforting filling of mushrooms and rice

I found myself only looking forward to the bites with the flavorful, moist, thin strips of chicken because the rest of the dish was lacking both in sauce and imagination.

If your expectations for Pad Mango are mediocre, you will not be disappointed.

They served large portions for the prices, and it was definitely a good break from campus food. Pad Mango is available on Grubhub, Uber Eats and Caviar. If I have another craving for Thai food, I’ll probably order an array of appetizers and leave the big entrees for when I can share with my friends, hopefully elevating the fun and the flavor.

Pork and shrimp dumplings (upper left); massaman curry (center); pad thai (upper right).

All photos courtesy of Olivia Gross.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

FEATURES

Page 8

Bakers

showcase

ing with different cooking styles, whether it’s baking Japanese cheesecake, cooking paella or frying tteokbokki (Korean rice cakes).

Out of this desire to experiment rose his interest in sourdough. “Because we have more time [staying at home in the pandemic], and we’re around the kitchen a little bit more, I got into sourdough,” Xie said.

What makes sourdough unique, according to the two bakers, is how the taste improves over time. “One of the things I love about sourdough is you can fit it into your schedule,” Crile said. “If you are at work late one day it doesn’t matter; your bread can sit in the fridge for 12 hours, 18 hours, 24 hours—it’s not gonna hurt it and it’s just going to enhance the flavor because the bacteria [is] fermenting the dough in the fridge.”

Crile typically begins baking with an autolyse, which is mixing warm water with flour.

Next he lets the bread sit for an hour, which allows the flour to absorb the water and become a smoother mixture. After this, he adds his starter (which is prepared by forming a bacteria culture in water and flour and allowing it to ferment) with salt. He stretches and folds the dough every 30 minutes for about two and a half hours. Later, Crile allows the dough to bulk rise for another three to four hours before letting it sit overnight in the fridge. While this is his usual process, Crile emphasized that certain factors, such as the temperature of the kitchen or type of flour, can influence the baking process. “You

can look at plenty of different recipes, videos [and] articles [on sourdough] and they’re all going to have some variation that’s unique to that recipe,” Crile said. “And it’s not necessarily that any of those variations is better or

patience,

love

February 25, 2021

with

sourdough

worse than the other. It’s a science [and] also an art of learning how the dough should feel and how each stage works.”

Xie, whose process is similar to Crile’s, also mentioned the many artistic forms of sourdough bread. He added, “You can make it into an oval shape. You can make it into a round shape. And some people even make triangular shapes.” Additionally, he noted how scoring, which is slashing the bread to allow the gases to escape and give loaves their signature puff, can serve as a baker’s signature. “You can make it into one singular slash. You can make designs. You can draw wheat on it, you can make it like an S shape, you can make it a cross shape, whatever you want,” said Xie. As he discussed bread-baking, Xie found himself reminiscing about the Vassar food community. “[I’m the president of] an organization called Vassar Generations,” Xie told me, “and we usually go off campus every weekend to the Vassar-Warner Home, which is a senior home nearby in the community ... We have collaborated with Challah for Hunger [a nationwide student organization dedicated to fighting hunger] many times, where they would bake [breads], and we would come together and bring the bread to [Vassar-Warner Home], and share the food that we’ve made and prepared. Unfortunately, this year has been very restrictive.

So unfortunately, we cannot share our joy of being next to the senior home and sharing

Courtesy of Pedro Augosto Lima ’21. the food [with them].” Xie would like to give his homemade goods to those in need, but admitted he hasn’t yet thought of a means of distributing them out of campus.

Crile has also considered sharing his food

in the Vassar community, but lamented that there haven’t been many opportunities given the current restrictions. Still, he enjoys seeing how food has brought Vassar students together during the pandemic. “Everybody is more or less stuck on campus,” said Crile. “So there’s no outside sources near as much for all of these things. And so people start making [food] themselves [since] you can’t get it anywhere else [outside of campus]. And it’s great to see how many people are doing more baking and cooking through this.” He added that moving into the townhouses this year has made cooking easier for him. “It makes everything so much more accessible, because it’s really hard to [make food] in a dorm. And I think that’s kind of the break off in the food community. Unless it’s done [in org events] that have other spaces available, then it gets really hard to do for a lot of students.”

For those who are looking to bake during their time at Vassar, Crile and Xie offer three words of advice. First: Baking is not a huge operation. “You don’t really need super fancy equipment to start,” Xie said. Second: Expect to mess up. “The first thing you make is probably not going to be good,” Crile explained.

“I’ve made plenty of things that I’ve had to throw straight in the trash, because it’s just

Courtesy of Pedro Augosto Lima ’21.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

Courtesy of Weipeng Xie ’21. inevitable. But it takes practice, and you’ll get there eventually. And it’s a lot of just getting the feel for it and learning some of the principles. It’s not all as complicated as it seems.” He even advises beginners to keep a journal to note what works and what doesn’t while baking, sharing, “You’re always gonna find new ways, learn new ways to do things [whenever] you’re in the kitchen.”

Lastly: connection. Xie emphasized the importance of bridging the gap between baker and audience. “I’m always trying to ask for constructive criticism and be receptive,” said Xie. “Sometimes the people who are making food have a biased taste [and] are sometimes blind to some of the faults that you might have when you’re baking. So [you should] really ask for the people who are eating or trying your food their honest opinion and be receptive to that.”

But no matter what it takes, the byproduct of baking is always worth it. “Some of the best feel-good moments I’ve had in [my] house is making something and giving it to people,” Crile remarked. “I’d never think a silent room could sound so good.” The two bakers continue to make food on campus, awaiting the day they can finally share it with the Vassar community.

Courtesy of Pedro Augosto Lima ’21.

February 25, 2021

FEATURES

Page 9

As students remain cooped up on campus due to COVID-19, some Brewers are capturing their creative spirits through the temporary, but beautiful, medium of snow. From Matthew Vassar and his dog to a giant “SEX” by the library’s lawns, enjoy these crystalline pieces of art before they melt away.

Chloe Gjoka/The Miscellany News

Janet Song/The Miscellany News.

Janet Song/The Miscellany News.

Natalie Bober/The Miscellany News.

Courtesy of Emily Lesorogol.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

HUMOR

Page 10

February 25, 2021

Breaking News

From the desk of Izzy Migani, Humor Editor

Coverified notifications fool naive students into thinking their social lives are intact Dr. G’s Love Advice: How to hookup when you’re COVID-positive Dear Dr. G, I just got out of a 10-day isolation after testing positive for COVID-19. How do I explain to potential hook-ups that I am now officially 100% COVID-free?

-Quivering Post-Quarantine Dear Quivering, Yes, you are correct that you now have a clean bill of health for COVID, not just at this time but for the entire rest of the semester. It may be vexing to you that any possible future hookup may be wary of your lack of testing and presence of antibodies. So, the challenge presents itself; how can you deal with the understandably COVID-wary Tinder match you’ve always thought was hot but only just matched with while quarantined in Alumni House?

First, this is a fantastic opportunity to spread some community COVID-knowledge. After all, this is a Highly Selective Liberal Arts College, so the only thing that spreads faster than COVID is education (“aNd gOssIP” don’t you think I already know that? Come on now, education comes in many forms)! You can start by using this link, to a guide on how soon you can be around others after having COVID. Specifically, you can turn the website into a QR-code and add it to your Tinder/Grindr/Bumble account. Not only is it oh-so mysterious and eye-catching to have a strange link on your dating profile, it shows potential partners that you are tech-savvy and could probably help them cheat on the coding assignment they didn’t know would be a part of their Cognitive Science course. Plus, if you’re really lucky, you’ll be tagged as a bot and permanently banned from the app, saving you from the awkwardness of matching with your boss next week and being unsure if it was just a friend-swipe or what. If you seriously want to commit to the bit, you could even

send it to the post office as a print job, or get stickers made in the Vassar Innovation Lab, I’m sure they’d love spending their actual paid time helping you get laid.

If you’d rather leave the Care-fronting to the CCT, then you can start figuring out ways to show your potential partner that you aren’t a health risk. Vassar has provided us a wonderful new tool, the CoVerified app, and in addition to being useful to check eligibility for athletics, you can start flashing your badge to your friend with benefits before entering their room.

We might as well put the little “CLEARED” message to use since more than half the student body has no use for them on a dayto-day basis. Next, you could send them screenshots that you completed the New York State Contact Tracing Automated Text System for ten days, verifying that you’ve cleared your infection. Better yet, call Health Services on campus and ask for some proof that you won’t be spreading any (respiratory) diseases by linking up

(ask for Bridget). On that note, you could get tested. Not for COVID, that would come back positive, but for STI’s! When was the last time you got tested? You have been so caught up in the sweet joys of a plastic swab assaulting your nasopharynx that you forgot about the simple pleasures of getting light-headed while the Baldwin nurse draws your blood because you are irrationally certain you have chlamydia.

Presenting a clean bill of sexually-transmitted health will show your partner that you are health conscious and may show them that you aren’t just making up the fact that you won’t give them COVID. Let’s say that you just can’t convince your partner that you’re COVID-safe. I don’t want you to get SARS-CoV-Too ahead of yourself; maybe they are more than aware that you won’t give them COVID and this is just the line they’re feeding you because they just don’t wanna slam anymore.

There are plenty more COVID-positive fish in the sea. To-date, there have been

87 COVID cases among students on campus. It’s not a sure thing, but at least one of them has got to be DTF. Maybe they’ve had challenges similar to yours in the fall and have the added bonus that they can actually test positive this semester. You can bond over shared experiences, like filling out the meal order form everyday or getting into weird, WEIRD things while gently losing your mind in the Alumni House.

See how far you can get with your fellow COVID-patient without violating any HIPAA laws.

Boning on campus has been a hot-button topic for decades, but especially in these “unprecedented times” it’s important to hold on to what gives you joy, and it is also important not to give someone COVID through your ejaculate. By following this guide, you can be sure to ease back into the dating scene on campus, and you can even work your way back up to spitting in your hookup’s mouth by the mid-semester recess.

Juliette Pope/The Miscellany News.

Brewer’s Texas family experiences snow for the first time Vivian Phillips

I

Brave Explorer Of The Icy Tundra

have seen more snow in the past week than Ted Cruz. Normally this wouldn’t be saying much—Cruz, like me, is from Texas, but given the circumstances it is deeply upsetting. I don’t know what Ted was expecting to come out of a trip to Cancun during a debilitating Texas snowstorm.

As someone who boasted to my college friends every day about the beautiful weather I was experiencing over the break, I have experienced hate for being in a warm climate while everyone else is freezing firsthand. The only difference here is that I have a legitimate reason to blame my family for my trip to a warm climate. Sure, Cruz’s daughters probably would have cried for a little bit if their beach trip was cancelled—if my dad was Ted Cruz, I’d want to cry too. If I wasn’t home for Christmas, though? My mother would be lamenting about that for years.

Ironically last week my family members

back in Texas were just as concerned for me as I was for them. My dad sent me an article from CNN that claimed, “It will be so cold this weekend in the northern US, you could catch frostbite in less than 10 minutes.”My mom called me on the phone during a brief five minute interval of power. “Sweetie, if you want to move back home for college don’t worry about it just tell us,” she said. “I don’t want you to have to live like we are for the next four years.”

Weather that was once unimaginable to my loved ones was suddenly tangible to them, as a fierce snow and ice storm swept through Texas, and all of the sudden my Texas family members thought I, a college student on the frequently-snowy East Coast, was a warrior of the tundra.

On Wednesday a friend of mine from high school’s Instagram story read, “Northerners, how do you do it?” As a Texan currently dealing with the same weather in the North that Texans are dealing with in Texas, I can assure you that we are not the problem. In

fact, I would argue that Texans are more tough when it comes to handling the cold than Northerners are. People on the East Coast have their Canada Goose jackets and hand warmers to help them handle the 20 degree weather. For the few days out of the

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

year that Texas is afflicted with truly cold weather, people just throw on a jean jacket and call it a day. Unfortunately, I forgot to pack my jean jacket when traveling to Vassar, but I’ll figure out a way to cope.

Juliette Pope/The Miscellany News.

HUMOR

February 25, 2021

Page 11

Lessons from the impeachment trial to apply to your love life Blair Webber

In Love With Mitch McConnell

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hile Valentine’s Day may have passed us by already, it is never too late to reevaluate your romantic relationships and ask yourself, “What can I do differently?” And where better to look for insights into sex, dating and intimacy than the second impeachment trial of former President Donald J. Trump? It could not have come at a better moment to make us all take a step back and desperately try to figure out not only what is wrong with this world, but also what is wrong with our sensual selves. The trial did not disappoint with tips and tricks to make everyone you meet fall to their knees and scream “Why, god, why is this happening?” Here’s a round up of the most useful romantic takeaways: Denial: The truth is overrated. Ask anyone. Well, ask yourself when someone says something that makes you feel like a bad person. Did you make fun of some-

thing your partner is sensitive about? Deny you ever say it. Did you storm the Capitol and smear your feces along the walls? If you insist it never happened—guess what?

It never did!

Lie: Much like denial, lying makes everything difficult and stressful about your love life, or inciting a coup, just melt away.

“But Blair,” you say, “lying makes me feel guilty!” Boo freaking hoo. Do you want to have a happy, successful, perfect relationship? Take a deep breath and insist that everything everyone is saying—and the video evidence they have to support it—is faked by the same people who were under attack weeks before just to make you look bad.

Empty Promises in Impassioned Speeches: We all knew Mitch McConnell must be quite the heartbreaker, didn’t we?

Well he proved it with that little number on the Senate floor. Voting to acquit and then shouting for a long time about accountability? Hold the magic still, Mr.

Senator! This might seem like a very specific action that is largely inapplicable to the average person’s romance—but trust me, next time you have to get your in-laws from the airport you’re going to want to use this one! Make bold claims about how on time you’ll be and then don’t show up. It’s a handy tactic with basically any behavior you don’t want to change because you get off easy, and your partner (or 70-some million Americans) hate it.

Cower: This one goes out to my fellow single people looking for love! But how do you find it? Try what the Senate Republicans who wanted to vote against the former president but just couldn’t bring themselves to do it did: Simply cower in fear.

Forget your values, your principles, your belief, your experiences hiding under your desk while an angry mob called for your colleagues to be hanged and just don’t put yourself out there. Why risk the discomfort of honesty when you could just...not?

Stay single. Stay morally compromised.

If you want some good tactics for cowering, see the sections on “lying” and “empty promises.”

Drop a Game-changing Piece of Information and then Do Nothing With It: Want things with your partner to get more serious? Want them to get less serious? Scream these things at the top of your lungs and then never break the silence that follows. It helps if, like representative Jaime Herrera Beutler, you have a whole group of other representatives threatening time-consuming legal procedures to ensure that your partner never has the chance to fully process or respond to what you just said.

No one ever said relationships or democracy were easy, but thanks to the impeachment trial, we now all know a few ways we can pretend to make big changes in our lives without doing anything differently.

B’S CORNER

BY B GOMEZ

FROG AND TOAD ARE FRENEMIES

by Julianna + Olivia

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

OPINIONS

Page 12

February 25, 2021

Fear and hatred rule the Republican Party, not Trump Sawyer Bush

P

Opinions Editor

olitical commentators and analysts need to stop saying Donald Trump still has a grip on the Republican Party.

Yes, there are still some senators and other Republican elected officials who lay their allegiance squarely with him, but the problem is much bigger than that. During his presidency it was not unusual for people to call the Republican Party Trump’s party as Republican officials fell in line behind him, refusing to check his abuses of the office of the Presidency. As tempting as it is to attribute all the blame of the radicalization of the Republican Party to one bad actor, we need to come to terms with the fact that there is a much larger problem with the party and its base. It is no longer about Republicans siding with or defending Trump.

Trump is no longer in power. It is not him whom Republicans fear; they fear the same voter base that launched Trump into power. They fear another angry, violent mob of his voters, like the one that attacked the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6.

To attribute all blame for the Republican Party’s behavior regarding Trump is to deny accountability and ignore a much more grave reality: there is a growing radical, extremist faction within the Republican voter base. This base harbors racism, sexism, xenophobia, science denial, and an appetite for baseless, dangerous conspiracy theories. It is not politicians like Trump who create this faction. They simply give it a voice. As long as we refuse to hold the alt-right, the extremist wing of the Republican Party that became more vocal under Trump, accountable for their power over Republican politics, this dangerous faction will grow and fester. Trump is out of office.

It’s time we start addressing what’s truly stoking widespread fear and hatred, particularly in rural regions of our country.

Trump did not create the alt-right, he created the path for its status in mainstream politics. This base allowed him to hold the presidency, but its power is not

Courtesy of Ted Eytan via Wikimedia Commons conditional on him. Rather, this extremist Republican base had a grip on Trump and now has a grip on the majority of Republican Congress members. Instead of focusing all of our attention on Trump and looking back on the atrocious four years that were his presidency, we need to take a deeper look at what was behind the floodgates that he opened. We are now retroactively trying to fix all aftermath of Trump’s presidency because we spent the last five years fixated on the figurehead instead of what the figurehead represented. After Trump’s four years of echoing and perpetuating their sentiments, these people have voices in mainstream Republican politics. The 197 House Republicans who voted against his impeachment and the 43 Senate Republicans who voted against conviction did so

not because of an allegiance to Trump, but out of either allegiance to or fear of the now vocal extremist faction of the Republican Party.

Trump is not the one dictating the actions of state and federal Republican officials. Trump was a doorman who escorted extremism into mainstream Republican politics. He gave them a seat at the table, but they existed before his rise to power.

He didn’t create them and he doesn’t control them. We need to stop acting like putting a bandage over Trump will eradicate the disease of American radical right wing extremism. Instead, we need to do some self-evaluation on what we did to radicalize a large portion of the country into waging war on our democracy. This extremist group elected several of its own to both the

House of Representatives and the Senate.

We can rationally expect the behavior of those Congress members to reflect the beliefs and values of this extremist faction of the Republican party. But other traditionally conservative Congressional Republicans who now either don’t condemn this extremism or enable it do so out of fear, not only for their career, but for their person.

Yes, Trump was the worst president in the history of our country, and there is much blame to place on him, but he does not control the Republican Party. The party does not act out of fear of him, it acts out of fear of the very same base that put him in office, and the very same base whose values he amplified. We need to stop worrying about the orange doorman, and start worrying more about whom he let through the door.

Greenwashed: How Utility Climate Pledges Are Purely Performative Johnathan Dean Guest Columnist

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rom a climate perspective, the new Biden administration is something to be happy about, particularly after a four year stretch replete with climate change denial and rampant misinformation. Biden has made it clear that climate change will be a central focus during his time in office. This is good, but only the beginning of a multi-decadeslong stretch of restoration and recovery. A New York Times analysis identified nearly 100 environmental rules and regulations “reversed, revoked or otherwise rolled back under Trump, [with] more than a dozen other potential rollbacks” that were never finalized. In his first day in office Biden undid a handful of rollbacks through executive orders, most notably rejoining the Paris climate accord. Biden and his team will have the opportunity to set the groundwork for a path toward a decarbonized nation—a task that will require the commitment of leaders across all industries and political associations.

Even with the new, climate-conscious administration may feel like a silver lining, it’s important to remember that Mr. Trump’s undoing of emissions policies will have permanent consequences. The pollution from emissions will remain in our atmosphere for decades and policy changes can do nothing to prevent this. New innovations in

carbon management and sequestration like carbon capture are promising for future use, but high costs and lack of scalability have prevented these technologies from being used to any meaningful extent. It’s possible, if not likely, that they’ll play a role within a decade.

But until then, the damage is done.

Joe Biden has stated he wants 100 percent percent clean energy by 2035. He plans to accomplish this in part by building on state-level renewable portfolio standards, stimulating significant growth in clean options by

“The discrepency between the greenwashed pledges being put out by the large parent companies and what is happening on the ground is astounding.” mandating utilities to buy a certain amount of power by a deadline. The price of renewables—in particular solar, wind and storage, have dropped dramatically in the past decade

(solar as much as 80 percent, and wind by 40). These three elements are essential for all deep-decarbonization scenarios, and their prices have fallen enough that decarbonizing is often the cheapest option. So this begs the question: Is America taking advantage of these falling costs? The answer to this question is nuanced, and varies based on which subsector you look at. In this article, I wanted to highlight the electric utilities industry.

Cleaning up the electricity sector is essential to nationwide decarbonization, and the companies in this industry will play a key role in ensuring a path to a livable future.

In the first month of this year, The Sierra Club, an influential grassroots environmental organization published a damning analysis of the electric utilities sector titled “The Dirty Truth About Utility Climate Pledges.”

This study looked at 50 parent utility companies and 79 operating companies, who are currently responsible for 43 percent of the country’s electricity supply.

The study examined their plans as of Dec. 1, 2020 to retire coal, stop building new gas plants and build clean energy in the next decade. They then assigned a score to every utility based on their findings out of 100. The average was a whopping 17 out of 100. The companies studied have committed to retiring just 25 percent of their coal generation by 2030.

In addition, “thirty two of the operating

The opinions expressed above do not represent those of The Miscellany News as a whole.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

companies included in this study are planning to build new gas plants totaling over 36 gigawatts through 2030.” Many of the electric utilities have pledged to decarbonize (still, over half have no such goal)—the problem is that almost none have plans to actually follow through or their goals fall short of what is needed to protect the planet. In fact, only five of the operating companies are legally bound to meet their goals.

Lastly, the Sierra Club found that “The average score was 20 out of 100 for utilities with a net-zero climate pledge and 14 out of 100 for utilities without such a pledge, showing that the pledges have not led to any appreciable amount of near-term ambition or action.”

These companies are spewing lies and false promises; the discrepancy between the greenwashed pledges being put out by the large parent companies and what is happening on the ground is astounding. In order to preserve a habitable climate, utilities must decarbonize, and they need to do it fast.

In conclusion, I would implore you to learn about your state’s current plans to decarbonize. What proportion of your state’s energy portfolio is nonrenewable? How invested in fossil fuels is your state? How central of a cause is a green economy to your state’s political leaders? Despite it being only a portion of our country’s carbon footprint, a green electricity sector is foundational to a decarbonized economy.

February 25 ,2021

SPORTS

Page 13

Australian Open Highlights Stars’ Intertwined Legacies Jackie Molloy

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assistant sports editor

hen Serena Williams and Naomi Osaka faced off in the semifinals of the 2021 Australian Open last week, the tennis world, athletes and avid sports fans alike had a hard time choosing one competitor to cheer for. On one side: one of most dominant athletes of her time in sport, politics and pop culture, the reigning GOAT of GOATS, looking for that long-awaited 24th Grand Slam singles title—the self-dubbed “Queen,” Serena. And on the other side, the heir apparent in all of the above, one of the 2020 Sports Illustrated Sportspersons of the Year, 23-year-old Naomi. Two of the biggest athletes in the world. Two of the most famous Black women in the world. The monarch and her successor. How can you choose just one to root for?

The easiest way to avoid such distress was by simply cheering for them both. No matter who advanced, there was sure to be a Black woman (not to mention a publicly-adored superstar) in the 2021 Australian Open Final, no small feat in a historically white and elitist sport. For Serena, it would be a chance at another opportunity to secure that elusive 24th Slam, tying Margaret Court’s all-time record en route to hopefully expunging the homophobic and transphobic former champion from the record books. Williams has been chasing the accolade since 2017, when she won her last title (also at the Australian Open) while pregnant with her daughter. Serena’s journey back to the biggest stages since her pregnancy has been challenging, an odyssey which few athletes can relate to. Postpartum blood-clots leading to a near-death experience (one that she almost single-handedly saved herself from after medical professionals refused to take her seriously at first), injuries from training, four Grand Slam finals losses since 2018 and simply her age at 39-years-old, have all contributed to a long, hard-fought climb back to the podium.

Naomi, on the other hand, “the most thrilling athlete of her generation,” is fresh off a 2020 in which she won the US Open and emerged as a leading activist in sports: She used her platform at the US Open to high-

light six Black Americans who were killed in the past few years, most by police, on her face masks walking into matches. She also wrote an op-ed piece for Esquire on supporting the Black Lives Matter movement and protesting police brutality.

So, when the two took the court at 10 p.m. on Wednesday night, the anticipation was high—most didn’t want either to lose. Serena came out hot the first two games, going ahead 2-0. She had been playing excellent defense the entire tournament, looking the fittest she has in a long time, and going up early and capitalizing on Osaka’s nervousness could have helped safeguard a victory for Serena. But, after the third game and some unforced errors from Serena, Naomi settled in and loosened up. From there, Naomi’s fast, hard serve and control of the center of the court proved too much for the defensive prowess of Williams, and Osaka won easily in straight sets, 6-3, 6-4.

Osaka advanced to the final that took place the following Saturday, where she prevailed over Jennifer Brady in straight sets as well, 6-4, 6-3. After Osaka’s win over Williams in the semifinal, it all seemed rather anticlimactic. The hype of the matchup between Osaka and Williams (will Serena defeat the kid to retain possession of the title of top female tennis player in the world?

Will it be a long, drawn out, hotly contested match between the two heavyweights?) did not necessarily match what was played out on the court. Ultimately, the match proved that this is simply Naomi’s show now.

Naomi and Serena will always be entwined in their legends, for reasons beyond Naomi’s rise to become her successor. Their rivalry truly began with Naomi’s first title.

Serena and Naomi met for the second time in their careers at the 2018 US Open final, the second Grand Slam final Serena had been in since returning from the birth of her daughter and the first final appearance for Naomi. The final became a controversial one when Serena was warned for illegally being coached from the stands and penalized for breaking her racket, eventually being penalized a game, all of which she adamantly protested throughout the match.

Her frustration and anger at the calls boiled

over onto the court and into the crowd, so when Naomi finally won 6-2, 6-4 and was rewarded her trophy, the stadium booed and the 20-year-old tearfully apologized for winning her first Grand Slam title. The wildness of the match immediately thrust Osaka into the limelight, one which, at the time, she was reluctant to step into.

The 2018 US Open final set Naomi and Serena up immediately as rivals, a description that would likely be disavowed by both.

But that doesn’t make it any less true. Naomi has emerged as the only legitimate opposition in Serena’s quest for 24 (besides Serena herself). There will always be a degree of emotion in their matches against each other—an opportunity to best your idol that few get for Naomi, and an opening for Serena to prove that she can still compete at the highest level. Yet, what has become clear after the travesties of 2020 and the 2021 Australian Open is that Naomi Osaka is more than Serena’s rival. She’s her enduring legacy.

Osaka was born in Osaka, Japan to Haitian and Japanese parents, and she lived in Japan until she was three years old, when she moved to Long Island, New York. Her father was inspired by the work Richard Williams did in coaching his daughters, Venus and Serena. Since the beginning of her career, Naomi has acknowledged the impact Serena has had on her as a young athlete, especially as a young Black female athlete, and admits she still watches all of Serena’s matches, even if it is not in preparation for playing her. You can easily see the impact that Serena has had on Naomi’s playing style: They both are extremely athletic baseline players, utilize powerful, fast serves and have a clutch ability to take over matches at the flip of a switch. But beyond their similarities on the court, Naomi has found herself as the true heir apparent to being the leading woman athlete in the world.

Since the beginning of her professional career in the 1990s, Serena, along with her sister Venus, has always unapologetically celebrated her Blackness and her identity as a Black woman. Despite being constantly criticized for the beads in her hair when she was young, her match outfits (like the one-legged catsuit she wore at the Austra-

lian Open this year to commemorate another famous Black female athlete, trackstar Florence Griffith Joyner), c-walking at Wimbledon and her outspoken support for the Black Lives Matter movement since 2016, Serena has always revered her identity and been outspoken about the injustices she has faced as a Black woman in the U.S. and while playing tennis across the world.

She has also never been afraid to clap back against any racist and misogynist critics that have stalked her career, including officials at Grand Slam tournaments. Perhaps thanks to Serena’s inspiration, Naomi has also publicly and unashamedly celebrated her biracialness. You can find her on social media posting about how she will be a character in a new manga magazine, on the cover of “Harper’s Bazaar Japan,” wearing a Haitian head wrap or remembering Emmett Till. Following in Serena’s footsteps, this past year has been huge for Osaka in stepping out as a leading activist in fighting racial injustices, as she attended the protests in Minneapolis over the murder of George Floyd and urged the 2020 Cincinnati Open to postpone play after she announced she would withdraw in protest of the shooting of Jacob Blake. The space Serena and Venus both occupy as leading Black women athletes who have continuously fought and lauded their identities for those like them, has allowed Naomi to thrive and inherit this space as a leading Black female athlete and activist.

The passing of the crown in women’s tennis most likely occurred this past week when Naomi Osaka beat Serena Williams in the semifinal. Even though Serena might still have enough in her to finally capture that 24th title, it truly is Naomi’s world now, with Serena just living in it. Naomi will continue to follow the path Serena has treaded for so long. She has even followed Serena’s lead already by uplifting more women in sports, investing in the National Women’s Soccer League’s NC Courage just after Serena invested in the new NWSL franchise, Angel City. Naomi will be a name the sports world will come to know as well as any. But just like her idol, only the first name is necessary.

Serena Williams and Naomi Osaka at the Stanford Classic in 2014, the first time the young Osaka qualified for the WTA Main Draw. Courtesy of topol6 via Wikimedia Commons.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

SPORTS

Page 14

February 25, 2021

Pandemic bolsters the case for college athlete compensation Doug Cobb

“A

Columnist

s far as paying players, professionalizing college athletics, that’s where you lose me. I’ll go do something else, because there is enough entitlement in this world as it is.”

These words come from renowned college football coach Dabo Swinney. Swinney is the head coach of Clemson University’s football team, and during his tenure he led the team to two national championship victories.

But Swinney’s comments have nothing to do with winning or losing football games.

They’re about a much more contentious and growing debate in the college sports world: Should college athletes be paid?

Swinney’s stance is abundantly clear. And he’s right. There is too much entitlement in our world.

But the players aren’t the problem; people like Swinney are. His annual $9.3 million salary coats his comments in sheer irony.

How dare these college athletes, who rake in billions of dollars for their colleges and universities and watch their coaches (who never put their physical health at risk for their job) make millions a year, suggest they should get their slice of the pie?

The better questions are: why is Dabo Swinney entitled to free labor to fuel his multimillion dollar salary? How is what he does—standing on the sidelines and screaming obscenities at players—more worthy of compensation than student athletes putting their bodies on the line to win a game Swinney will get credit for? Don’t throw stones from your glass house, Dabo.

If big Division 1 schools want to be treated like they are institutions whose top priority is education, that is fine by me, but their actions have to back it up. If you claim to be a school first and foremost, then why is your football coach paid more than any other employee (including the school president)?

Why does your budget depend so heavily on football and basketball that you need to cut other sports once you lose one season (of football and basketball) to a pandemic? If education is what you stand for, then why do you rake in millions off of students who usually don’t end up with a degree?

Yes, technically all these athletes are given a scholarship, but an often overlooked point in this debate is that most schools only offer scholarships on a yearly basis. A scholarship your sophomore year doesn’t entitle you

to one your junior year. The college (more specifically the coach) decides scholarship renewals. So what happens if you get injured? The rules vary by school, but many can decide not to renew a scholarship due to an off-field injury. Broke your leg in a car accident? You can kiss that degree goodbye.

Other things completely out of an athlete’s control, like a coaching change, can also lead to the loss of a scholarship. The same applies if you aren’t performing as expected and get cut; cutting players who are injured (even on-field) could also mean the loss of a scholarship. The rules supposedly in place to prevent this from happening can be utilized upon appeal, but that could take months or even years to come to fruition.

What about the starry-eyed student-athlete who lets their pro-basketball dreams blind them from the harsh reality that they might not make it pro? How is it acceptable for a college to turn away one of their students if they declare for the draft and it doesn’t work out? 19 year olds don’t get a second chance if they make a risky career decision. We need to stop pretending that everyone who plays college basketball or football gets a guaranteed education (or for that matter, a trip to the pros). They don’t.

Colleges use the free labor of 18-22 yearolds to make billions of dollars, and they neither compensate that workforce nor guarantee them a secure path to a degree. College athletes at Division 1 schools don’t have anyone protecting their interests. They aren’t allowed to unionize, and although the NCAA claims to protect student-athletes’ interests, these young adults have next to no say in the organizations’ policies. Doesn’t it seem predatory for schools to make billions of dollars off student athletes, many of whom are teenagers, all while denying them compensation, educational security and a voice in the policies governing them? What adults are looking out for the financial interests of 18 year-olds living on their own for the first time?

The COVID-19 pandemic only exacerbates all of these problems. Even though many schools have deemed it unsafe to return for in-person classes, their football and basketball seasons go on unfettered. At the height of the pandemic in December and January, when the United States saw record cases and many universities sent their students home for remote learning after Thanksgiving, NCAA basketball (a full-contact indoor

Clemson Tigers’ Coach Dabo Swinney has expressed disgust for the idea of paying college athletes.

Courtesy of Lauren Nelson via Wikimedia Commons. sport!) played on.

One of the most appalling examples is Duke basketball. On Dec. 25, Duke announced the cancellation of its remaining women’s basketball season due to COVID-19 safety concerns. Surely the men’s team playing the same sport at the same university had their season cancelled too, right? Wrong. As I am writing this, the Duke men’s basketball team is still chugging along. Do college-aged males have some genetic difference from their female counterparts that lowers their risk for infection? No. So if it isn’t safe for the women’s team to play, then why is it safe for the men’s team? The answer is that it’s not, but the NCAA and its big time basketball schools can’t bear to lose all the money that will come from having a men’s basketball season. The health of these athletes is the sacrificial lamb for collegiate sports’ pockets, and students don’t have a say in the matter.

If it is too dangerous to force professors into classrooms, then why force unpaid students to face similar risk?

And before you argue that “they don’t have to play if they don’t want to” or “they aren’t at

risk because they are young and healthy” let me stop you. It is true that no one is holding a gun to these athletes’ heads and forcing them to compete, but you can’t discount the pressure they face to serve prestigious sports programs like Duke’s. Pressure from teammates and coaches to return, the fear of losing a scholarship (which we’ve established is a real possibility) or one’s standing on a team and, worst of all, the lack of knowledge of what the risks actually are make this an unfair decision to place in the hands of young people with little to no one looking out for their interests. And while it is indeed believed that COVID-19 is unlikely to have devastating effects on young and healthy athletes, there is certainly evidence that it can.

Now more than ever it is clear that colleges and the NCAA have been getting away with exploiting the workforce that makes them billions. And they aren’t going to start looking out for the athletes out of the goodness of their hearts; they will only look out for them if we pressure them to do so. After all, the pandemic has revealed that nothing is more important to the NCAA than its bottom line.

Juliette Pope/The Miscellany News.

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

February 25, 2021

Page 15

The Miscellany Crosswords “Wanna see a movie?”

ACROSS 1. Ready to swing 6. Think ahead 10. A text, for short 13. Quagmire 14. Structure in a grainy photograph?

15. Shirts 17. Prefix with -plasm 18. Radiate 19. Unmoving 20. Result of a hard drive crash, maybe 23. “___ humbug!”

25. Doze, with “off” 26. Pontius ___ 27. “The back door” 29. Injection risk for a herpetologist 32. Transforms 34. BMW competitor 35. Punishment for wrongdoing, per Hammurabi 36. Unit of resistance 37. Significant 42. ___ avis 44. Nobel-winning mother 45. - Nevada’s capital 50. 1998 animated film about a bug’s life 51. Late Swedish musician with the 2013 hit “Wake Me Up” 52. Mid-Apr. pen pals, for many 54. Dedication 55. Bonnie, vis-à-vis Clyde 59. Seven Dwarfs’ refrain 60. “So long!”

61. Shocking defeat 64. Revise

By Ian Rosevear and Greg Calidonna

65. Point-of-view newspaper piece 66. The Philippines’ highest peak: abbr.

67. French possessive pronoun 68. Finger, as a culprit 69. Animation studio behind 2021’s “Luca”, and four other films hidden in the starred clues

DOWN 1. Unit of current 2. Street sludge 3. Pamphlet 4. Regarding 5. Plant pricker 6. False prefix 7. Walk unsteadily 8. Touched down 9. Spot to jot 10. Halt, as a laugh 11. Middle 12. Do business with 16. “I call ‘em like I ___!”

21. Mythical birds 22. Holy 23. The Crimson Tide, colloquially 24. Auth. unknown 28. Act as mole might 30. 19th-century Persian-born religion with over 5 million followers worldwide 31. Spirit made from fermented sugar 33. Addictive drug 36. Villainous creatures of Middle Earth 38. 60 minuti 39. John Coltrane’s instrument of choice 40. Founded: abbr.

“Social Distancing” ACROSS 1. Small swellings 6. Newest 14. Zen Buddhist’s Enlightenment 15. French lexicographer Pierre 16. Surpass 17. Restrained 18. Uninhibited, or let the genie out of the bottle?

20. Coffee dessert 21. Cath., Prot., etc.

24. Meaning of a nod 25. Kick-ass Pokémon 30. Sincerely 33. Simon and Garfunkel song 36. Wikipedia battle 37. “Look forward” 39. Drug that treats insomnia 40. ___-cone 43. Hollywood union 44. 1950 Kurosawa film 48. Following CDC guidelines, or what the circled letters literally are 52. García Márquez’s homeland 55. Nintendo action figure 56. Fire-dog 57. ______ Mae 58. Escape door 59. Armada

DOWN 1. Hugh of “House” Says

“Don’t ____ muscle” Rainbow maker Opera singer Cesare Heyday A raja’s wife Was in Latin Lonely fish?

Colored That in Spanish Snake sound Common tpyo Sentimental person 19. “Call me ______.” first line of Moby Dick 21. Lobster limb 22. Greek goddess 23. Done working, abbr.

26. Roman baths 27. “Love ____” Beatles Song 28. “__, __ there?” Possible response to directions 29. Profit, Brit’s spelling 30. Odin’s wife, alternative spelling 31. Cracker brand 32. Cinco y tres 33. Post-noon times 34. Rooney of “The Social Network” 35. Juul, for example 38. Where Marco Polo traveled 40. Land e. of NH 41. 2007 Eddie Murphy movie 42. Like a ballerina 45. Rod 46. Aries star 47. Express view

41. In a ___ (confused) 43. “Friends” actress 44. Banks of modeling fame 45. Squirrel away 46. Dodges 47. Lionel of Neo-Soul 48. Moves over a bit

By Reese Collins

48. Silk in French 49. Popular Hungarian men’s name 50. Halo console 51. Foreign film ending 52. Half-___ (Starbucks order) 53. Japanese demon 54. POTUS, or PM

MISCELLANY NEWS | VASSAR COLLEGE

49. Slew of invective 53. Befuddle, as with a brain teaser 56. Daddy 57. Part of a supermarket list 58. Eye opener?

62. Gov. group formed by Nixon 63. The Raptors, on scoreboards