Sorrento Bowling Club Magazine Issue 53 September 2013

r e t t e l s w e N b

u l C r u O

Number 53 September 2013

Welcome Daniel Woodrow our new Bowls Manager

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Contents

President’s Report Some Notes from Your Editor Deputy President’s Report Croquet Report Men’s Captain’s Report Ladies Captain’s Report Greens and Grounds Report Men’s Match Report Umpire’s Corner Men’s Selector’s Report Ladies Selector’s Report Women’s Champion of Champion Singles Darts Report Some More “Hot Hints from Heardie” Thanks to Glenn Boston Sorrento Birthday Boys Where Can I Shop Now? Changes to the Heat Rule The difference if you marry an Aussie girl!

Tribute to Euie Tennant The Club Personality Guide Very Clever The Good Ol’ Days Some of our members enjoying their holidays Some more member’s holiday photos Welcome to “Cafe Sorrento” Around Our Club Answers to Quiz A Clean Energy Future A Short History of our Club Some More History BOWLS RULE Our First Newsletter April 1978

4 5 9 11 14 15 16 17 18 20 22 22 23 23 24 27 28 28 28 29 30 32 32 33 34 35 37 37 38 39 40 41 42

President’s Report

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he Management Committee, for 2013 to 2015, has the task of continuing the great work by previous Committees.

My view is that our club rates number one in most areas and this has been achieved by good management, a large number of willing volunteers, and friendly devoted members. I believe your new committee has the quality to take this great club forward.

Daniel Woodrow has been appointed Bowls Manager. Daniel brings many skills to our club and we look forward to improvement in performance on the greens. Well done to the Sub Committee led by our club Captains John and Sharon. The concept of having a Bowls Manager is a step forward for our club.

Brian Lucas has worked tirelessly on our new POS system. The introduction of our new Smart Card will streamline our service to members and control events more efficiently. Thanks Brian.

Friday night dinners have been an immediate success with over 100 meals served most weeks. We welcome Chefs – Ross and Trish to our club – and look forward to their continued success. Bookings are essential so don’t miss out. I think that if 100 members and guests dine at our club in the off season, numbers will soar during the Bowls season. Well done by Glenn Boston and Greg Day for seizing the opportunity when it presented itself.

Sponsors are very important to our club, where possible please give them the opportunity to win your business and please let them know you are from the Sorrento Bowling Club. Greg Day does a lot of work to secure Sponsors, Thanks Greg.

I am confident that our club will continue to prosper and wish you Happy Bowling.

Please feel free to contact me if you have any problems or suggestions – Barry Bradshaw

Some Notes from Your Editor – Neville Odell If you would like to comment or contribute to our newsletter please contact Denise or I on 93093108 or at nevodell@bigpond.net.au Welcome to our September 2013 newsletter! First of all we now have a new “comments, complaints, corrections, clarifications and compliments” section: Comments, Complaints, Corrections, Clarifications and Compliments Our June 2013 special bumper commemorative edition of our newsletter was well received by members with some favourable comments and compliments: “What a quality publication. Congratulations to your Club and to you and your wife as the publishers of the newsletter” “Thank you again Neville and Denise for a superb newsletter” “Congratulations! What a great newsletter and a great Club. I read every bit of it” First of all apologies to Anne Lilley for leaving out the tail end of her Delegates report.

We missed the fact that there was a second page. The missing bit about the heat rule is included in this newsletter. We also managed to call Wilma Bradshaw “Thelma”. Once again apologies but we do try hard to get everyone’s name correct.

A special prize goes to Derry Ellis for finding the deliberate error in the Greens and Grounds Report. The ink was hardly dry when Derry discovered that we were going to irradiate the earth worms in C and D greens when we meant to eradicate the earth worms. At least we know that some members read every word!

Some more “Did your Know/Hear” Did you hear that Jem Shorland will be entering his latest poem – “Smart Dogs” in the Boyup Brook Bush Poets Breakfast in February 2014 ?

Did you hear that Dick Oates studies the inside of his toilet rolls? Whilst in the process he discovered a hidden message from Quilton on the inside of the card-board roll. This message tells users that “Quilton Loves Your Bum”. It is always interesting to hear what members do in their spare time!

Did you hear that John Sturk managed to fall over whilst visiting the Vanuatu volcano? Barry Bradshaw tells about how he had to fire-man lift him down the mountain and clean his wounds with ginger beer.

He apparently tried to blame Barry for pushing him over!

Did you know that at the second Dash for Cash a well known and respected member of one of our Pennant teams bowled down no less than four (4) wrong biased shots? I know we have all done this at some stage, but after the fourth shot a team investigation took place and it was noted that the offending bowl had the small circle from the Pennant stickers on ‘ both’ sides!! A good ploy if bowling at a batsman but disastrous if trying to get to the ‘Jack’. No names need to be mentioned but his father may have been in the “baker-y’’ trade. To assist this member (and a few others) we publish the photo alongside hoping that this will help in the future.

Did you know that Buzz Aldrin’s mother’s maiden name was Moon?

Did you hear that your Editor managed to upset the Ladies Match Committee when he got the “Them” and “Us” mixed up on his score card? This is what happens when you promote a Lead to a Skipper.

Did you hear that lawn bowlers are still fighting an Equal Opportunity Tribunal ruling that competitions in South Australia must abandon single-sex teams or risk being in breach of the Equal Opportunity Act. Many of the State’s 17,000 bowlers are not opposed to mixed social games, but playing with Jack (and Jill) is not everyone’s cup of tea. “If you’ve got the women in the rink you tend to take it a bit more easy and of course your language is curbed down too,” one male bowler said. “Theirs is a different game, believe it or not, it’s a much more aggressive game,” a woman bowler said. More than 5000 lawn bowlers have signed a petition calling for Bowls SA to be allowed to keep running single-gender and mixed competitions.

Did you hear that a US man has become an overnight quadrillionaire after a Pay Pal error left him with a 17 figure bank balance. Chris Reynolds, opened his monthly e-mail account to find $92,233,720,368,547,800 had been credited to his account?

Mr. Reynolds, who uses Pay Pal to buy and sell vintage car parts, said he opened his account expecting to see the usual $100 but received a major shock. He planned to use the money to pay down the national debt and buy a local baseball team. However, he

didn’t get the chance, as the error had been corrected by the time he logged into his Pay Pal account.

Some more “Did you hear?”

Did you hear that members of the Brimfield and Little Hereford Bowling Club were stunned to see the Queen of England watching their game from the side-line before striding across the green for a CHAT. The game was taking place in the grounds of Windsor Castle last Sunday when Her Majesty decided to go for a walk to take in some “fresh air”. The Queen chatted with the bowlers who “were absolutely delighted”.

Did you hear lawn bowling dress codes were challenged at the Central Division Men’s Pairs tournament as three bowlers showed up in uncoventional foot coverings. The Laws of the Game were scoured to see if the bowlers were in violation of any sock regulations. Calls to the head umpire went unanswered, so in the end the matter was settled with an agreement by the three to submit to a photo.

Did you hear Ray and Maureen Green celebrated their GOLDEN WEDDING ANNIVERSARY in spectacular fashion at the Fremantle Town Hall? Congratulations to you both! In the photo alongside we have Coral and Jan sharing a moment with Ray. Ray and his daughter Nikki own Trevor’s Carpets and are one of our important sponsors.

Did you hear that one of our members, who shall remain nameless as he is an influential member of the Selection Committee, whilst on holiday on a cruise ship, was banned from all future wine tasting functions because he tried to take four glasses of wine back to his cabin as the event was closing? Apparently his argument for doing this was that “the wine was required for medicinal purposes”. His lovely wife was personally invited by the Captain to all future wine-tasting events on condition she did not bring her husband! This same gentleman also got banned from the carpet bowls competition when he put his first two bowls out of bounds. This meant that he was sin binned for a minute with a seven shot penalty. This allowed the opposing Ladies team to draw the match. This did not go down too well with his fellow team mates and he was banned from future bowling tournaments!

Did you know that squirrels can remember the hiding places of up to 10 000 nuts?

You’re Editor can’t even remember where he has put his bunch of keys!

Did you know that disappointed lawn bowlers are threatening to quit Pennants because Bowls South Australia wants to scupper cuppas? The 15-minute interlude for sandwiches, coffee and cake will end. Older bowlers say they will lose important social time together and the chance to “take a breather’’.

Did you hear that Snowy, aged 70, managed “to pull a muscle” on D Green at a critical stage of a game? His play deteriorated from brilliant to average as he tried desperately not to fall over!

Did you hear that Beryl Taylor (Ron’s Mum and the late Shane Taylor’s Granny) celebrated her 91st birthday on the 8th August? Beryl has been playing bowls for more than 50 years. She and her husband Ernie Taylor were founder members of the Bedford Bowling Club.

Did you know that Pat Dichiera, our new Treasurer, has four different business cards?

Depending on your question he will offer the most appropriate one!

Those members who enjoy going to the theatre will know that the Wanneroo players recently produced “Calendar Girls”.

It was a great success and sold out every night. It has been suggested that the Sorrento Bowling Club produce a similar calendar as a fund raising opportunity. We therefore need a volunteer for each month. It will be very discreet and member’s wrinkly and/or wobbly bits will be covered with fruit or a lawn bowl. Croquet balls and mallets will also be permitted. Please contact your Editor who is keen to try out his new camera!

Did you know that England has been the most successful bowling team at the Commonwealth Games, with 18 Gold medals to date? Bowls is played in over 40 countries.

Did you know that a Daily Mail survey listed the ten things men do poorly. These are buying clothes for women, remembering anniversaries/birthdays; dancing; ironing; cooking; domestic chores; buying gifts; multi-tasking; keeping up with fashion and picking furniture.

Did you hear Judy and Peter Farrell went to Caernarvon and spent three weeks playing bowls. Peter tells me the greens would have been the envy of many bowls clubs.

There were players from many WA Clubs.

Peter got lucky and was drawn in a strong team that went onto win the Wintersun Caravan Park July Carnival with four wins from four games!

Please support our Sponsors In the past we have asked members to please support our sponsors. You will note that we are now including some adverts for members who provide a service.

We have Ray Green who owns Trevor’s Carpets, Mick Martin who provides a carpet cleaning service, Greg Day who provides a garden service, Allison Waldock who is a qualified naturopath/herbalist and Nick Paniperis (Jan’s son who is a Chiropractor). So please support them as well!

A few words of thanks

Why You’ll Love It “With plots, intrigue and surprise endings – lawn bowls is a thriller, not a snoozefest. Tactics play a huge part in the game, along with razor-sharp hand eye coordination.”

Thanks to John Hauck who tells us the average man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

Finally I would once again like to thank all the members who have contributed to this newsletter. Without your help we would not have a regular newsletter.

Deputy President’s Report

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i to all our members both old and new. What a success it has been that we are doing Friday night meals at Cafe Sorrento.

As I write this we are going into our fifth week and the fantastic support from members is really appreciated.

We have served over four hundred meals so if you haven’t tried our new Cafe come and join us. Remember to book by 12 noon on a Friday.

Our Club has had a successful trading period this winter and all is going well. Thanks again to all the bar staff, grounds people and our volunteers. What would we do without you.!

Don’t forget to diarise our Melbourne Cup event on Monday 4th and Tuesday 5th November 2013. More details will be sent out to members next month.

Good bowling!

– Greg Day

Jem Shorland’s Tribute to his Wife – Bev DOWN THE AISLE In Seventy-two my wife set the date, By happily telling me she’d be my mate.

On January the tenth I waited a while As she relished her last single steps down the aisle.

She’s given me moments of rapturous joy But most of the time I’m a, ‘Yes dear!” toy boy.

A better schooled husband would run for a mile From changes to lifestyle she brought down that aisle.

For forty-one years now through sunshine and rain, She’s learned to manipulate now and again, And again, and again, as she maintains the smile That first greeted me as she tripped down that aisle.

After my marriage I became quite resigned To the fact that my brain had been badly designed, And like a test dummy that’s been used in a trial, My brain’s been re-wired since my wife walked that aisle.

Women are wonderful creatures I’ve found Often they’ve both of their feet off the ground.

Designed to bewitch, to confuse, and beguile, They’re all in “The Zone” once they’ve walked down that aisle.

But things have regressed now, of late, as I find I’m at serious risk now of losing my mind.

Woollies and Coles do not feed her denial To purchasing goods as she walks down their aisle.

And IGA, Myers, and David Jones too All give our wives lots of things they can do.

They chat and they wear all the latest in style As they follow their instincts to walk down an aisle.

They look and they chat as they finger the wares.

How much will they spend on what soon will be theirs?

They care not to tally or dare to compile The total of money spent walking that aisle.

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So back for a coffee, comparing their buys, No doubting their reasons, no questions, no whys?

They’ve had a great time. They’re tired, but docile.

They’ve enjoyed yet another slow walk down an aisle.

So now I’m declining both in years and in health, Prescriptions and Myer’s have diminished my wealth.

I’ll sit in my wheelchair, sad eyed and senile, Discomfort displayed as I’m pushed down the aisle.

But men are like Mars and women like Venus.

We’ve been easy meat since the day they’d first seen us.

I know on their faces they’ll have the same smile When final bells toll, and they dance down the aisle.

Marriage for men is like lambs to the slaughter.

But me, I enjoyed life with more than one daughter.

I publicly state here I’ll never revile, And never regret my wife walked down the aisle.

– Jem Shorland

Croquet Report

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e begin our newsletter again, by thanking all the volunteers who have assisted with the ongoing maintenance in the Croquet area. Tree roots levelled, paving fixed, bricks laid and the list goes on. WE ARE GETTING THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mary Gardner had a week long birthday celebration as we all seem to do as we get older. Mary shared her special day with her Croquet friends at the Kingsley Tavern. Mary told us all that when she first came along to play croquet, her first thoughts were “CROQUET WAS AN OLD PEOPLES GAME” she quickly realized how “WRONG SHE WAS”.

Wandering Members News: Terry Harvey and Trish Klemp made the journey to Gosnell’s Croquet Club for the “Gosnells 12 Gold Croquet Tournament” They played 6 games on Saturday and 5 on Sunday. They won 4 games against better players, and were in with a chance against the others. Both their handicaps were 8 and in one game they had to give away 4 free hits. They even had to give last year’s winners 2 free hits! Gosnells is a very friendly and sociable club. A wonder spread of snacks and drinks was provided all day long on both days.

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Our club shirts and colours were much admired and they thoroughly enjoyed the good company and competition.

Ricochet Tournament held at Como: Judith and Kerry with Peter and Terry decided to show their croquet prowess and skills by competing in the event held at Como. It was absolute slaughter. The girls got off to a good start and won their first game, we won’t mention how the fella’s faired other than to say that both teams were annihilated. We are obviously not as good as we think we are!!!!!!

In House Golf Doubles Tournament: Many of our members entered in this tournament. It was a great day, the sun shone, the worms abundant and we played dodgem with Magpies and Willy Wag tails. Atmosphere was perfect. Trish and Kathy won the day with a twist in the run for second place between Kerry/Kerry won. (No it’s not a typo) due to a last minute withdrawal, lead to her playing a double. Kerry/Kerry won the booby prize.

York Croquet Club - over 65’s Progressive Golf Doubles: This event was held over the first weekend of August and was attended by three of our members. As usual, the hospitality was warm and the games most enjoyable with players changing partners for each game. This became a great learning experience, which is inevitable when you get to play with top players. Everyone who entered had a most enjoyable time and shared lots of laughter in a delightfully congenial atmosphere. Trish Klemp not only celebrated her birthday in York, but also came 3rd in the Tournament. She turned a slight shade of red when everyone sung “Happy Birthday” to her at the presentation of prizes.

The social highlight of the weekend was a dinner held at the nearby Tennis Clubhouse where the York members produced a delicious 3-course meal accompanied by an excellent homeproduced Cabernet Merlot wine. The only competition to the deep red colour of the wine, were the bruises sustained by one of our members, who slipped in the bathtub, pulling the towel rail off the wall in the process! We have been reassured that only shampoo and 13

clumsiness (no alcohol) was the cause – and as hubby was not there, we cannot point a finger at him.

In House Ricochet Doubles: Sadly not many of our members supported this event, but for those who did attend a good day was had. It was a full day, topped off by a few wines at the end of the day.

Winners of the day were Trish Klemp and Pat Hobson.

Up and Coming Events: In House Golf Singles Tournament – at the club on Saturday 7th September.

Bowling Club – Opening Day Sunday 15th September.

Platinum Day – Friday 20th September.

Ricochet Singles Tournament – Saturday 5th October.

Quote from Bernard Shaw: (supplied by Tony Fowke) “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”

– Judith Skeet

Men’s Captain’s Report

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he Executive of the Sorrento Bowling Club proudly announce the part time appointment of Daniel Woodrow to the position of Bowls Manager. Daniel is the Bowls Australia Community Development officer who has shown interest in the SBC since his first visit to the club.

Daniel’s duties will include.

• Representing the SBC in Pennant competition.

• Forming close relations with Club coaches.

• Being part of/closely involved with the Pennant teams selection panels.

• Organising practice sessions, pre season events and out of club practice.

• Working with the Men’s and Ladies Bowls committees in implementing strategies that will see the club going forward in bowling prowess.

Daniel, has played Premier Division for Essendon Bowling Club in Melbourne , he has also represented Victoria in State challenges. Daniel comes to SBC with ideas that he believes will make the SBC a better, stronger and a more competitive Bowling club in the Metro Area.

There are exciting times for the Club coming into our next Bowls season and we are certain that all bowlers will support Daniel and the other committees of the Men’s and Ladies Bowls in making the Sorrento Bowling club “the best bowling club in Western Australia” 14

Some things to remember.

• Opening Day 15 September 2013 • Complete Pennant notification form, selectors need final numbers to nominate teams.

• Enquire about “Thumbs Up” club – contact Kevin Cook • Enquire about general volunteering – contact Ken Giles • We require Volunteers to organise Community Bowls – contact Ken Giles.

• First Pennant trial Saturday 5 October • Under 18 National Championships commencing 30 September volunteers required- contact Ian Wittber/Ian Marshall.

• New shirts arriving in a few weeks.

• Support all your Committees.

– Abba

Ladies Captain’s Report

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he newly-elected Ladies Management Committee has been very busy already since the AGM in June. By the time this newsletter goes to press, we will have met three times to discuss and plan organisation of the events, both bowling and social, for the coming season.

Up coming events and dates to make note of are: 1. Ladies Quarterly Meeting on Tuesday 3rd September at 10am at the club. This meeting is an important one as lots of information is shared about activities for the up coming season.

2. The Club’s Opening Day on Sunday 15th September with two games of bowls and lunch plus the official opening by honoured guests. The format for the composition of teams will be changed this year to provide a more competitive and fair contest – hopefully also lots more fun. A new trophy will be purchased in honour of this changed format.

3. The annual Ladies Fashion Parade will take place on Tuesday 24th September, starting at 10 am with morning tea, show and lunch. Fashions will again be provided by Kings Park Fashions modelled by some of our own lovely ladies. Tickets are available from the bar at the club.

4. Pennants Practice dates are as follows: Wednesday 25 September (the Tuesday is the Fashion Parade), Tuesday 8 October and Tuesday 15 October. All days will be 9.30am for a 10am start and club uniform is to be worn. More information will be given nearer the dates.

5. Circuit Training will begin on Monday 21st October, starting at 2.30pm.

6. Tuesday 22nd October is the first official game of Pennants for the 2013-14 season.

7. Saturday 2nd November is the first official game of pennants for the 2013-14 season.

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I am endeavouring to make very regular contact with as many of our lady members as possible by e-mail. It is a very quick and efficient way of contacting a lot of people at once. It also means that I can send an e-mail at 11pm at night if need be, without disturbing anyone. I am still putting paper notices and meeting minutes up at the club, as per usual, for those who don’t have e-mail.

I am hoping that this bowling season will be a productive, successful and happy one for all club members. I trust that I will be able to serve the ladies, and the club in general, productively and professionally in my capacity as Ladies Captain. Have a great New ‘Bowling’ Year!

– Sharon Eggers

Quiz for those with Ageing Brain Cells!

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hanks to John Forkin and Mike Berecry for this quiz.

Answers on Page 37

1. Johnny’s mother had three children. The first was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child’s name?

2 Before Mt. Everest was discovered what was the highest mountain in the world?

3. What word in the English language is always spelt incorrectly?

4. In California you cannot take a photograph of a man with a wooden leg.

Why not?

5. If you were running a race and you passed the person in 2nd place what place would you be in now?

6. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?

7. Is it legal in Australia for a man to marry his widow’s sister?

8. A farmer has 17 sheep and all but 9 die. How many are left?

Greens and Grounds Report

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ou may have noticed that “A” is not advancing in leaps and bounds; however, that is expected in the slow growth period associated with winter. In early spring we will notice an increased growth rate that will enable us to Laser level and to top dress, 16

with heavy fertilising. We do not expect the green to be available until the New Year.

At this point in time we do not envisage any of the other greens having to be renovated like “A”.

Paving between all the greens, also “E” green and the Croquet court have been completed. Other areas are being considered for paving or edging.

The “Thumbs Up” club met on the 8th and on the 22nd of July, we can do with a few more volunteers to attend. This time of the year is much slower paced than in the summer, so it is an ideal time to learn some of the things we will be doing later.

The greens have been looking a little dry (prior to recent rains), however, that has come about by the need to treat the Earth worm infestation and associated with that, the need to spray for Pearlwort (a type of weed that looks similar to Moss). We expect a return to normal in the future as growing conditions improve.

The lockers have been repaired and strengthened so they should last us for a long time when back in place, in the change rooms. A big thanks to Jaffa for the effort he put in fixing these. Brian Saul has been working hard on replacing the wheels on the Community bowls carts, thanks Brian.

The Thumbs up club are working on refurbishing the scoreboards (painting and renewing spacers.etc) and also painting of the safety rails around the greens is taking place. Thanks also to Colin Bangs for the extra time spent on painting.

We are not happy about having to close the greens, however this month has been a very wet one and therefore damage would be done to them. We will err on the side of preservation of greens rather than ensuring games take place. This way we will have good greens for next season. We will endeavour to give as much notice of closure as we possibly can, but that also has to rely on forecasts sometimes.

– Kevin Cook

Men’s Match Report

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he second of four 2013 Dash for Cash events took place on Saturday 27th June. The weather was again brilliant, and we had a full roster of 24 teams entered, including several from neighbouring clubs. Mind you, we had a few minutes panic shortly before we started when we realised that one player was in two teams, and we had to scramble to find a fill-in. Thanks to Monique Kopec for making herself available when we ran out of men to call. (Why is it there never a man around when you need one, ladies?)

At the conclusion of the morning rounds, seven teams had won both games, but by the end of the day only 3 teams had won all four 10-end matches. The overall prizes were 17

then decided amongst these three teams with John Brown’s team (Richard Bone, Brian Lucas and Wayne Gray) beating Tom Nasuti’s team (Bruce Eagles, Warren Elliott and Steve Mortimer) into second place, with a visiting team from Quinns skipped by Ian Parker filling 3rd spot.

Note from your Editor: John Brown, the Skipper of the winning team, displaying the prize across his chest! Unfortunately we were unable to get the full team together for a photograph.

Best pair of morning results were carded by Mick Murray with Ron Kuziela, John Dilley and Brian Clausen, and the best pair of afternoon cards were from Juris Lorencs and his team of Steve Draper, Mick Martin and E Taylor.

Other winners Best 1st round Best 2nd round Best 3rd round Best 4th round

Aaron Delaporte, Brian Saul, Jim Welch and A Elmer Alan Anderson, Mike Carrigy, John Abercrombie and Peter Crow Tony Sabatino, Derek Smith, Ken Giles and Graeme Heard Colin Campbell, Greg Day, Monique Kopec and Peter Bartlett

Our thanks to Safeway Security Screens for their continued sponsorship of these events. Unfortunately the August Dash for Cash was rained out and abandoned with 22 disappointed teams!

Some Up-coming Events (Men/Mixed) Opening day Sunday 15th September Cancer Charity Day Friday 20th September National Under 18 Championships Monday 30th Sept. to Thursday 3rd October (Spectators welcome) Mixed Fours Championship Sunday 13th and Sunday 20th October Full fixtures and club events schedules are in preparation and are planned to be available on opening day.

– Trevor Orton

Umpire’s Corner

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owls Australia are currently reviewing the Laws of the Sport of Bowls and Domestic Regulations as part of the four yearly review by World Bowls. Bowls WA have invited Clubs to submit proposed amendments to the Laws and Regulations, which if supported by Bowls WA and the majority of other states and territories, will be submitted by Bowls Australia to World Bowls for consideration.

In response to the Bowls WA notice placed on the notice board several members raised 18

Show your Sorrento Bowling Club membership card at Brumby’s Bakery in Darch and receive a 25% discount on inhouse baked items 19

with me the issue of Skips versus Seconds scoring in a game of Fours. As a result, Sorrento has made a submission to Bowls WA to change the law(s) to allow Skips in a game of Fours to delegate scoring to the Seconds. A number of other WA clubs have made similar submissions and Bowls WA have put the proposal to Bowls Australia for further consideration. A final decision on proposed law changes will not be made until World Bowls meet during the 2014 Glasgow Commonwealth Games.

During the summer months you may have noticed a small white wooden box attached to the shade cloth frame between A and C greens, used to house the thermometer for Bowls WA’s extreme heat rule. The recommended housing for air temperature measurement is a structure known as a Stevenson Screen costing around $600. We have been very fortunate to obtain such a housing, second hand, kindly donated by Kevin Coffey. Thanks Kevin. Arrangements are being made to mount the Stevenson Screen on a trolley so that it can be wheeled out or stored away securely as required.

Thanks also needs to go to Bill Long who has kindly remodelled the umpire’s equipment boards which should better protect the precision measuring equipment and allow easier access through the doorways. Thanks Bill.

Men’s Selector’s Report

– Jim Ironside

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he Saturday pennant practice will be played on the 5th, 12th and 19th October and the Thursday pennant practice will be played on the 10th and 17th October . Because the greens are unavailable on Thursday 3rd October we will only have two Thursday pennant practice days before the official pennant games start.

A number of members have not submitted their Pennant forms. We may have to “name and shame” those who have been a bit slack.

The unavailable sheets will be on the notice board in the next couple of weeks. If you are available, we would like you to be here by 12.30pm., but if you are running late, please telephone the club by the above time, to let us know that you will be attending, as we hope to get started by 1pm. and whites will be required for these practice games.

For the 2013/14 pennant season, we have been allocated the following teams.

Thurs. 1 – 1st Division Sat. 1 – 1st Division 2 –2nd Divisions 1 – 2nd Divisions 2 – 3rd Divisions 2 – 3rd Divisions 2 – 4th Divisions 2 – 4th Divisions 2 – 6th Divisions 1 – 6th Division Any extra divisions will have to be applied for and they will be in 6th division.

– Mens Selection Committee 20

Contact Nikki Green on 9443 1911

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Ladies Selector’s Report

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uesday Pennants have been allocated, for the 2013/14 season, the following: Two first Divisions viz, 1 White and 1 Green North, One Second division, One Third division, and two Fourth division sides.

Saturday Pennants at this stage only have enough full time players for one division and we would need at least another four players to nominate two divisions. If anyone else is interested in playing please call Jan Cook (94486213) at the earliest possible opportunity.

Our first Pennant practice will be the 25th of September followed by the 8th of October and then the 15th October. Please watch the notice board for further information.

Circuit training will commence on October 21 and we are looking for a good roll up to commence this year. We trust this year will be more successful than last and to do this we need to put in the effort as a total group.

– Jan Cook

Women’s Champion of Champion Singles

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endy Saul was the very deserving Women’s Singles Champion for Sorrento Bowling Club for the 2012-13 season. This then qualified her to play in the Champion of Champion Singles held at Yokine Bowling Club on Saturday, April 20th, where Wendy was to play against the singles champions from other clubs around the state.

The weather was sunny and a vast improvement on last year’s rainy conditions. The first round of the competition is always sectional, and then, subsequent rounds are knockout. Wendy drew two country opponents in her section. Her first game was fairly close, but Wendy was in the lead for the entire time. She then marked the second game, after which she played the remaining lady who was from Kukerin. Wendy won this match very easily, making some exceptional shots and consistently putting multiple bowls close to the jack. She remained focused at all times and never allowed herself to be ‘rattled’ by challenging situations in any of the heads in either of the games.

These two wins took her comfortably into the next round, where Wendy came up against Bev Scott of Capel who is a state player as well. Wendy bowled very well, making Bev work hard for every shot won and winning a very creditable number of shots herself. The final result was a gap of only a half a dozen shots between the players.

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Bev was very complimentary about Wendy’s game and congratulated her on making the game so challenging.

Wendy did herself and Sorrento Bowling Club very proud with her performance and demeanour during the competition. And we are certainly full of pride for her achievements during the season. Well done, Wendy.

– Sharon Eggers

Darts Report

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nfortunately due to the unavailability of the community hire bus the club has had to cancel the planned trip to Bruce Rock on 17th August 2013.

The trip will be rescheduled to a date in the new year dependant on when the community hire bus becomes available and the Bowls Pennant dates.

I would like this opportunity to thank Ian Marshall and Glenn Boston for the efforts they put in to organise the trip.

We are still awaiting the Bowls events calendar to be determined. Once this is made available the dates “Bowls vs Darts” bowling day and the “Darts Wind-up” will be announced.

– Wayne Gray

Some More “Hot Hints from Heardie” As we get close to the start of our Pennant season it is important to remember the following: • Earn respect from your opponents. Fight the game out to the very end.

• Every bowl counts! So be sure that your grip, stance and balance are correct for the shot you are about to play.

• Warming up and stretching will reduce your chance of injury and enable you to bowl better, earlier in the game. This can give you the winning edge.

• Fluid intake is vital. Don’t wait until you are thirsty and this means water.

• Practice makes perfect is wrong, perfect practice makes perfect. Remember, the harder you work the better you perform.

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• Do not discuss wet or slow greens. Just get out and play.

• If you are not sure of the shot to play, don’t play, find out and then play with just one shot in mind.

• If someone on your rink is performing poorly you need say nothing - they know!

What you do is lift your own game – it may be your turn next week.

– Graeme Heard

GET BACK TO OPTIMUM MOVEMENT and HEALTH

Do you have any of the following?

• lower back pain and/or stiffness, • neck pain or stiffness, • mid-back pain, • headaches, • sciatica, • muscle spasms or cramps, • leg or arm tingling or numbness?

For all your musculoskeletal and chiropractic needs see –

Nick Paniperis, Musculoskeletal Therapist and Chiropractor Complete Care Chiro and Physio 384 Scarborough Beach Road (inside Fitness First) Innaloo Ph: 9204 1010

Thanks to Glenn Boston

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ne of the most endearing characteristics of the Sorrento Bowling Club is the loyalty of its members and the length of time that they remain members of the Club. Glenn Boston is no exception.

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He joined the Club back in 1991, just after the Western extension of the clubhouse was completed and EGreen became operational. Joining initially to play darts, Glenn joined the bowling fraternity in 1995, playing under the skilled captaincy of Lee Walker with Bill Henry leading. Social bowls which was organised

by Ron Needham in those days, became an important activity for Glenn. Glenn fondly remembers the two eight badges that he won as a Skipper.

Succumbing to his masochistic tendencies, Glenn decided to become a bowls selector in 2000, working alongside Steve Draper and John Dawson. It is only now that he his starting to recover from the experience.

Glenn also supported the Greens Committee, helping to roll the greens and undertake other tasks.

It was also about this time that Glenn became involved in running the Club’s bingo nights, working with such famous people as Con Stephenson, Marie Smart, Ian Wittber, Gordon Kirkham and Euie Tennant over the five or so years that the competition ran.

As a dart player, Glenn supported the Club as its Treasurer and vividly recalls the two 180 badges that he won playing competition darts.

It was about that time that Glenn showed an interest in the operations of the bar, working with Vicki Miles and Ken Barker and the then Chair of Bar Peter Chipman (Chippy).

Des Bennett taught Glenn how to clean the beer lines. After Chippy left around 1998, Glenn became a regular member of the Bar Committee and Executive Committee, working in various roles on and off for around 9 years before becoming Club Manager over the past two years.

Two challenges that Glenn faced during his time with the bar is introduction of computerised tills around eight years ago and running the show while the Club was undergoing its major renovations in 2008, when the bar was being completely stripped and without cool-rooms and half the clubhouse was a no-go zone.

Attending the Club to undertake his various duties became more difficult for Glenn when he moved from Hillarys to Butler 10 years ago, requiring a 46 kilometre round trip.

Glenn was born on New Year’s Day back in 1951 and married Alison twenty-one years later. He recalls with some pride that he has spent more than one-third of his life at the Sorrento Bowling Club as a member and as a volunteer and it is naturally an integral 25

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part of him and his life. He particularly enjoys the characters of the Club like Smithy, Con Stephenson and Charlie Beggs. He also loves the bowls and darts carnivals to places like Wongan Hills, Koorda, Narembeen and Rockingham.

Looking back at past years, Glenn recalls the success of the Police Bowls Carnival hosted by the Club; introduction of Chase-the-Joker; renovations to the Club since 2007; the introduction of meals and regular entertainment; winning Club of the Year awards; the willingness of so many people to lend a hand; and so much more.

Looking to the future Glenn believes that the Club’s challenges are to effectively deal with and sustain the growth achieved in recent years; keep up to date with new technologies such as the new till system, membership and room booking systems and better computer technology; and adapt to the recent growth demands that move the Club from one that could be run largely by volunteers in past years to one that is increasingly requiring a professional focus that will require more paid staff.

Glenn’s hope for the future is that we will sustain and deal with our recent growth; lawn bowls will remain the central focus of the Club with membership growth to that which our greens can accommodate; further extensions to allow the administration and match areas to be improved and the kitchen extended; continued meals and entertainment with dancing and shows; and a continuation of all the great things and people who have made the Club the success that it is.

Glenn attends the Club most days, enduring his 46 kilometre round trip. He is the familiar face that we love to see; the happy chap that is always willing to lend a hand; and the person who always keeps the interest of the Club at the forefront. We thank you Glenn for all of your hard work and dedication and for simply being you.

– Neville Odell

Sorrento Birthday Boys

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he 19th of July was a very important day for Sorrento Bowling Club with four of its members celebrating their birthdays on that day. Alan Rolls, Les Float, Dick Currie and Mike Smith were all born on the 19th July, although in different years so any claims that they are “quadruplets” cannot be substantiated. Marty and Eric Tompkins both had birthdays several days later in July and their birth year was the 1933, so they were nearly twins.

It would be interesting to know how many other members were also born on this date, so come on girls confess, you don’t have to state your age just your month and day to be included in the birthday group.

– Dick Currie 27

Where Can I Shop Now?

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hen I was ready to check out and pay for my groceries the cashier said, “Strip down, facing me.” Making a mental note so I could complain to my local MP about this running amok security rubbish, I did just as she had instructed.

After the shrieking and hysterical remarks finally subsided, I found out that she was referring to how I should position my credit card.

Nonetheless, I’ve been asked to shop elsewhere in the future. They need to make their instructions a little clearer for seniors. Man I hate this getting older stuff.

– Ray Stapledon

Changes to the Heat Rule

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his is the paragraph that was left out of our June Newsletter: Extreme Weather Policy “Bowls WAFixtures and Events Committee will consider the recommendations put by Club delegates on these issues and any changes will be included in the 2013/14 fixture book. In view of the overwhelming support from delegates it appears highly likely that a General Abandonment of a game will be called

by Bowls WA should the weather forecast be for 38 degrees on the day. This decision will be placed on Bowls WA web site and broadcast on the radio as previously. I will keep you advised as soon as further information becomes available on any of the above issues”.

–Anne Lilley: Bowls WA Delegate

The difference if you marry an Aussie girl!

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hree friends married women from different parts of the world. The first guy married a Greek girl. He told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning.

It took a couple of days, but on the third day he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away.

The second married a Thai girl. He gave his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes and the cooking. The first day he didn’t see any results but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done, and there was a huge dinner on the table.

The third guy married an Aussie from Port Kennedy. He ordered her to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed, and hot meals on the table every day. The first day he didn’t see anything, the second day he didn’t see anything 28

either....... By the third day, some of the swelling had gone down, he could see a little out of his left eye and his arm was healed enough that he could fix himself a sandwich and load the dishwasher!

– Thanks to Mike Berecry for this story

Tribute to Euie Tennant 22 December 1929 to 5 June 2013

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n 5th June 2013, the Sorrento Bowling Club lost one of our great friends, Euie Tennant. Euie had the most commonly misspelt Christian name in the club (most people called him “Hughie”), but whatever people called him, I never heard anybody say anything bad about him. He was a friend to all. Up until his health began to fail, Euie could be seen practising at the club several times a week.

A number of our club members were at his funeral and shared his life with his family and friends. His family called him “The Professor” because he always seemed to have a solution for everything.

Euie’s trips to Ningaloo each winter were legendary. Euie even took his carefullynurtured tomato plants with him for some fresh fruit during his stay. I heard of the fish he caught, but I never actually saw any.

Euie was my loyal Twilight Bowls partner for over six years.

Even on his ‘bad’ days he could usually find a way to rescue the head, and we certainly won more matches together than we lost.

We even managed to beat “God” one afternoon (see photo).

But Euie was much more than just my bowls partner – he was my friend and will be remembered fondly.

– Trevor Orton 29

Trevor Orton, Cal O’Donnell, John Goddard and Euie Tennant playing in the Twilight Pairs Cal tells me that on that day“although he played with ‘the God’ the Devil got the better of them and they lost the game!”

The Club Personality Guide

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hanks to Glen from the Edithdale bowling club for this “club personality guide” which has been adapted for the Sorrento Bowling Club by Jem Shorland.

THE GRUMPIES This lot are a dime a dozen. They are always at the club in some capacity, yet grumble every second they are in the Club. They will go on and on about how good things were in 1975 and will criticize anything anybody says. Any good ideas you present to them will be swallowed up in their black hole of negativity and they will constantly gripe about women playing on Saturdays. The only way to tolerate them is to agree with whatever they say, no matter how absurd, and add your own grumble.

THE PLEASANT OLD LADIES In our Club “Our Pleasant Old Ladies” are pure gold. They work tirelessly for the club, love a good laugh and love to bowl and play croquet or cards. Every Club needs them.

Where would we be without our delicious sandwiches, date scones, sausage sizzles etc.? Joan is beautiful and ageless.

THE VOLUNTEERS We are lucky to have more than 100 members who are always prepared to help with painting, plumbing, gardening, helping behind the bar, rolling the greens and all the odd jobs required around our club. We tend to take them for granted and even criticise them when we don’t like what they do. If it was not for our cheerful and helpful volunteers we would need to increase our annual subscriptions and fees.

THE RETIRED EX CRICKETERS/FOOTBALLERS/GOLFERS/TENNIS PLAYERS/BASKETBALLERS This “sporty” group (Alan, Peter, Trevor, Barry, Bob, Beth, Shelly etc.) are the number one recruits of modern day bowls. Ranging from thirty to seventy years of age, they have slowly realized they can’t compete with the young guys in their chosen sport and have found their Nirvana at the Sorrento Bowls Club. Half a dozen of these guys can turn your bar trade into a cash cow. They tend to be a bit cocky as being “naturals” as they adapt very quickly to bowls.

THE REGALERS The Regalers (e.g. Dick, Max and all the Brian’s) never laugh at your best jokes and always tell you one back, even though you have obviously heard it before and don’t want to hear it again. Tend to tell you what a great game they played while listing you amongst the poorer performers.

THE ONLOOKERS The Onlookers such Bill, Pat, Terry etc. always sit in a group observing and muttering.

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They know it is not necessary to speak clearly or loudly because fellow onlookers have all fared badly at hearing tests, wear cheap hearing aids, and they are not interested in news about any other football team. They are all ‘THE WEST’ subscribers.

THE NOTE TAKERS Note Takers such as the Newsletter Editor – Neville, Derry and the selectors find fault in all you do, especially on the green. Fail to see the point of your message, and refuse to laugh at anything genuinely humorous. Frequently ask to borrow your ball point pen.

THE OLD SILENT PLODDERS Any club worth its salt has some old plodders (Graham, Graeme, Ray etc.). They rarely talk and spend hours walking extremely slowly around our Club. What they do is a mystery, but be assured their work is essential. Once in a blue moon they will suddenly turn in your direction and ask a very important question that you will not have the answer for. They will then get back to their business and not speak until next season. Don’t be fooled by their pace. They are deadly bowlers and win multiple Championships. How, I hear you ask?

THE POLITICALLY CORRECT PAIN IN THE BUTT MEMBERS This type will have already made a complaint to some Government body about all my comments above. These men and women have joined the Club to, “Get involved with the community” or “Help the club through hard times”, or some similar drivel. They will get stuck straight into your constitution, run for the Executive Committee and talk to you like a patronizing bozo. Within seconds of becoming members they will nail a proposal for a code of conduct on the notice board, and then proceed to suck the fun out of the club.

THE PANIC MERCHANTS Finally you are guaranteed to find a panic merchant at every Club . Their usual modus operandi is to read a snippet in the Club Newsletter, Executive meeting minutes or a WABA notice, focus on one sentence and then proceed to yell out across the club that immediate action is required. If they hear of a POSSIBLE change to the club uniform, or a rule change MIGHT be taking place; be assured that the panic merchant will interpret the POSSIBLE and MIGHT into DEFINITELY WILL in a split second. It will take hours of discussion to stop the panic. BE WARNED!!

They are also adept at over fussing about any new member to the club. They will be paranoid about what hat/cap they are wearing, will be scared that they haven’t had ten hours coaching before they even touch a bowl and generally annoy the living daylights out of any person interested in joining the club.

– Thanks to Jem Shorland and Edithdale Bowling Club 31

Very Clever

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he Australian Medical Association has weighed in on the Prime Minister’s new health care proposals.

• The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

• The Gastroenteritis had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but the • Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.

• The Obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception.

• Ophthalmologists considered the idea short-sighted.

• Pathologists yelled, “Over my dead body!” while the • Paediatricians said, “Oh, Grow up!”

• The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the • Radiologists could see right through it.

• The Surgeons were fed up with the cuts and decided to wash their hands of the whole thing.

• The ENT specialists didn’t swallow it, and just wouldn’t hear of it.

• The Pharmacologists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the • Plastic Surgeons said, “This puts a whole new face on the matter....”

• The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the • Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.

• The Anaesthetists thought the whole idea was a gas, but the Cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say no.

In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the arse holes in Canberra – Jem Shorland

The Good Ol’ Days

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was born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, copy machines, contact lenses, mobile phones and the pill. There weren’t things like radar, credit cards, or ball point pens. Man had not invented pantihose, dishwashers, clothes dryers, electric blankets or air conditioners.

Mum and I got married first then lived together, Every family had a father and a mother Until I was 21 I called every man older than me ‘Mister’.

Sunday was set aside for going to Church as a family or visiting your relatives, without 32

first making an appointment or telling them of your intended visit.

We were before gay-rights, in fact the word gay meant having a good time and was not linked to any same sex unions.

We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions. Serving your country was a privilege, living here was a bigger privilege.

We never heard of FM radio, tape decks, CD’s, word processors, yoghurt, smart phones, computers or guys wearing ear rings. We listened to serials or “top of the pops” on the radio, and our only drugs were a Bex powder to heal a headache.

You could buy a Holden for $500 but who could afford one. Too bad because fuel was only 3 shillings (30 cents) a gallon.

We were before sex change and we were the last generation that was so dumb as to think that you needed a man and a woman to have a baby.

No wonder people today call us old and confused, there is such a generation gap.

– Dick Currie

Some of our members enjoying their holidays

Carmel on an ostrich!

Lorraine and Carmel at Victoria Falls

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Carmel says she sent the above picture to her sons and said – “Look what I found, meet your new Daddy”.. They emailed back saying – “Oh dear there goes our inheritance”.

Some more member’s holiday photos

Hilda eating ice-cream and Pat drinking beer outside a church in St. Petersburg Russia. Our members certainly get around in the winter

Can your spot Croquet players, Vini and Charli amongst the Terracotta Warriors in China?

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Chris Burwood showing off the fish he caught on holiday

Carmel in Africa walking with the lions

Welcome to “Cafe Sorrento”

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y now a lot of members will recognise this couple as Trish and Ross Cunningham who are now providing our Friday night meals. Previously at Scarborough Sportsmen’s Club for approx. 20 years, they are skilled operators and our Vice President Greg Day was able to secure their services for the benefit of our Club. We welcome them to a long and successful venture and urge all members to give them full support.

Footnote: Ross and Trish are also skilled bowlers and will help strengthen our Pennant teams!

Left: Our Vice President and his charming wife Janine

Clive and Jan Webber and Ken Partridge enjoying a laugh

Peter and Judy Farrell enjoying the evening

Mike McGeehan and his wife Avril

As usual the event was well supported by our Croquet members

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George and Kerry Sjepcevich two of our regular supporters

On the opening night, Mike Smith and Margaret Staddle celebrated their birthdays

Con Stephenson and Barbara Stow another two of our regulars New members John and Wendy Wright showing us how its done!

Alongside:Tony Pilgrim and John Abercrombie enjoying the evening

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Around Our Club

Tony Sabatino with his restored 1982 Mercedes

Tony Pilgrim, Neil Breakell and John Hauck enjoying a beer

Dick Merton working on the flower-beds and Ron Kuziela hard at work coring D green. Some members think the fairies do the work at night

Answers to Quiz on Page 16

Margaret Watson showing off her bowling skills 37

1. Johnny of course 2 Mt. Everest; it just wasn’t discovered yet 3. Incorrectly 4. You can’t take pictures with a wooden leg.

You need a camera 5. You would be in 2nd. Well you passed the person in second place , not first 6. Moses didn’t have an ark, Noah did 7. No because he is dead 8. Nine

A Clean Energy Future

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hanks to Daniel Woodrow (from Bowls Australia), Dylan Fisher (one of Bowls Australia’s up and coming young players) Raj Suares (from Bowls WA)and Paul Hart (from Solargain) for their presentation and for sponsoring a bowls competition for our social bowlers.

Look carefully at the above photo and you will see a few of our members resting their eye lids whilst deep in concentration as they absorb the words of wisdom emanating from the presenters

The winners on the day were the rather loaded team of Mike and Bev Carrigy, Lorna Glew and Richard Bone 38

Teams had to consist of not more than two first or second division bowlers. A few Skippers tried to sneak in one or two stronger players but the organisers were wide awake and prevented any borderline additions!! A good day was had by all. Many thanks to the organisers

Some club members studying a rather scattered head at a critical stage of the competition

A Short History of our Club

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hanks to Arthur Stewart who recorded some of our early history and to Peter Wooldridge who supplied some old photographs we have used below.

FOUNDATION MEMBERS

The origins of our Club go back to 1970 when the Commonwealth Government arranged a public meeting to organise sporting facilities in the district. Two ladies and three men were present. Arthur and Edna Stewart agreed to look after local bowling interests.

The following persons are the original Foundation Members of the Sorrento Bowling Club (Inc.).

In 1975 the Sorrento Sporting Club was formed with the State Government providing a five acre site for a club-house and greens.

• Arthur Stewart

– Our 1st President • Roy Schofield

– Our 1st Secretary • Edna Stewart • Graeme Heard • Bernice Herbert • Bill Leyland • John Murphy • Jack Pitt • Flo Pitt • Alex Pullar • Min Pullar • Peter Wood

Adjoining areas had been ear-marked for parking and other sports and the whole area was later combined as the Percy Doyle Reserve.

Some tentative advertising resulted in six bowlers meeting in 1976 and this was followed in June 1976 when 16 interested bowlers met in the local coffee shop.

The meeting was chaired by Peter Wooldridge the President of the Sorrento Sporting Club. Arthur Stewart was appointed President of the Mens’ Lawn Bowls Section and Dot Rundle was appointed President of the Ladies Lawn Bowls Section.

In July 1976 it was decided to enter one team into the 6th Division in the Men’s Pennant Competition, there being only nine confirmed players with two reserves. The ladies were unfortunately unable to enter a Pennant side that year.

At this stage the Sorrento Sporting Club were investigating the construction of Club rooms.

The first design for a grandiose 2-storey building with entrance and toilets on the upper 39

floor was scrapped and $140,000 was made available for construction of a single storey building.

There was considerable argument about the Ladies toilet facilities and a kitchen. A small store room had to be hastily converted into a decidedly inferior kitchen.

The size of the steel girders supporting the gable roof often drew comment from visitors, with some comparison to Sydney Harbour Bridge The Club-house were handed over and available to members on the 15th December 1976.

Some More History

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raeme Whitehorn has been culling a lot of old papers and photographs gathered over 20 years. He has managed to find a photo of the midweek Pennant winners for the 1994/1995 season. It was interesting to see that members were required to practise three times a week and provide the Selectors with details of their practice times. Thanks Graeme. A number of our current and “older� members will be interested in this bit of history.

1994/95 1st Division Winners Sorrento Bowling Club Back row left to right: Ben Dinning, Ron Nielsen, Ron Mentiplay, Niel Adams, George Kerr, Mick Malone, Graeme Whitehorn Front row left to right: Allan Partington, Con Parker, Doug Fitzgerald, Ron Butler, Allan Stain (not in photo) 40

BOWLS RULE

I must confess I disobeyed

A Bowling Golden Rule,

Last Saturday at Social Bowls

“I did feel such a fool”.

With all the Bowlers gathered ‘round.

They knew that I had sinned)

When as I bowled my second bowl,

I couldn’t help ‘Pass Wind”.

It wasn’t just a sneaky one

That people could ignore,

It reverberated ‘cross the Green –

The bowlers stopped in awe.

It travelled at the speed of sound,

The Clubhouse door blew wide.

And the ladies making sandwiches,

They dropped their plates and cried.

They called out for the Fire Brigade

‘Disaster!’ was the cry,

‘Explosion’ or a ‘Sonic Boom’,

They thought they all would die.

Meanwhile --I tried to bluff it out – ,

I pointed to Rink Three,

But it was a wasted effort,

They all knew that it was ‘ME’.

The Skipper came and said to me,

“Are you sure that you’re O.K.?”

And the opposition Skipper

Lodged a protest straight away.

He said that “It was ‘foul’ play

And by Rule Thirty Three,

A distracting noise while on the mat

Can cause catastrophe!”

But our Club won the protest,

And that rule they did rescind,

And the new rule states “That play goes on --- Against Prevailing Wind!”.

– Grahame “Skew Wiff”Watt 41

Our First Newsletter April 1978

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hanks to Peter Woolridge for this copy of our first newsletter. You will see we were still a sporting club at that stage. In these day a middy of beer cost $0.44 and a bottle of beer was $0.77!

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