FW October 2022

October 2022

Atrium Health

Windsor Jewlers

Fall Forecast…

Casual & Comfortable

Nitsa’s

S K I N C A R E , S P O R T S W E A R , S P E C I A L O C C A S I O N , B R I D A L , P R O M , A C C E S S O R I E S , A LT E R AT I O N S

Winston-Salem 336.725.1999 107 South Stratford Road, Stratford Village

nitsas.com

#wewearnitsas

@nitsasapparel

Salemtowne Retirement

Best Asian Restaurant & Runners Up Sushi 2020

Winner Best Asian Best Sushi Runner Up

HakkaChow

NEW:

Biggest Sake Selection in the Triad.

WEEKLY DRINK SPECIALS

More than 20 different Sake available.

Tuesday all moscow mule cocktails $2 off Wednesday all mojito cocktails $2 off Thursday half price wine by the glass Friday & Saturday bottled beer $1.50 off and draft beer $2 off Sunday mimosas and bloody marys $6 half price flavored sake by the glass

(336) 893-8178 | hakka-chow.com 615 Saint George Sq Ct | Winston-Salem, NC 27103 (Right off Hanes Mall Blvd. across from the Wynnsong 12 Movie Theater)

Monday Closed Tuesday -Thursday 11:30am - 9:30pm Friday 11:30am - 10pm Saturday 12pm - 10pm Sunday 12pm - 9pm

Budget Blinds

WINSTON-SALEM

FUNCTIONAL TRAINING

TEAM TRAINING

ALL ABILITIES

Strength, Hybrid & Cardio Full Body Workouts 45 minutes

Build community & accountability 1 on 1 coaching in a group training environment

Programming designed to cater to all abilities in 1 class!!

F45

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f45training.com/winstonsalem | 336.703.7556 winstonsalem@f45training.com |

@f45_training_winstonsalem

486 N Patterson Ave, Suite 125 | Winston-Salem, NC 27101

New Fresh Look. New Extended Weekend Hours. New Coffee Bar Menu

Same Great Hospitality

Midtown Dessertery

151 S. Stratford Road | Winston-Salem, NC 27104 | 336.724.9800 | MidtownCafeWS.com

PUBLISHER Brooke Eagle Brooke@ForsythMags.com

EDITOR Keela Johnson Keela@ForsythMags.com

SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE Tamara Bodford

ADVERTISING MEGAN BLACK PHOTOGRAPHY

Advertising @ForsythMags.com

H

EDITORIAL DIRECTOR Vonda Henderson

BACK OFFICE & VIRTUAL ASSISTANT The Office Nerd, Denise Heidel

COVER PHOTOGRAPHER ere I am, the day we go to print, frantically attempting to write this.

I always aim to share something inspiring, something that resonates, or something you’ll remember so my goal for next month is to start Brooke Notes earlier!

The months sure do roll around quickly… I can hardly believe we’re already in the last quarter of 2022. Time is a funny thing, isn’t it? My Pop Pop Charlie told me once that life is like a roll of toilet paper… the closer you get to the end, the faster it goes. This saying always makes me laugh, but also slightly terrifies me. I’m only 32 years old and it’s already going too fast!

I was having a conversation with a close friend of mine the other day about how sometimes we thrive on being busy.

Do you know the feeling? It’s almost an adrenaline rush to be constantly going and going and going. Until you can’t. Until your body decides it’s finally had enough, and it forces you to rest. For me, my body has been deciding to give me migraines. I had one recently that lasted for a couple of DAYS. Talk about forcing you to slow down.

While I certainly don’t have life figured out, I do think it’s important to listen to your body and slow down before it forces you too. Slowing down may mean setting better boundaries with work, spending more quality time with your family and friends, making exercise and sleep a priority, fueling your body with healthy foods, picking up a fun hobby, etc.

I don’t know about you, but I know I feel better when I do those things. My stress and anxiety levels go down and I’m an overall happier person. I mention this because often this last quarter of the year is a busy one. Lots of extra events, a school routine, the holidays… it can be a lot!

Here’s to making October a month where we make time to slow down and soak in the important little moments of life.

We hope you enjoy reading this issue as much as we enjoyed putting it together. While of course I encourage you to read cover to cover, I want to point out a few highlights in this issue:

• Read all about our cover feature-- the fabulous Black Mountain Chocolate team—starting on page 66. They encourage you to “simply slow down and savor the chocolate” and I couldn’t agree more!

• Brenner Children’s Atrium Health Wake Forest Baptist presents Cheers! Happening on November 4th at Truist Baseball Stadium.

Learn more and purchase tickets via the QR code on page 71.

This month, our sister publication, LKN Magazine, is featuring Dynamis Estates on their cover! I’m sharing because this stunning vineyard is only about a 35 minute drive from Winston-Salem, and it is oh-so-worth the drive!

I’m not kidding when I say it feels like you are visiting Napa Valley. You can read all about Dynamis (and see the stunning photos) at lkn-magazine.com I can’t end this without mentioning Breast Cancer Awareness month. My mom, Keela, is a two time breast cancer survivor and I have countless other women in my life who have had breast cancer. I bet you know someone who has suffered from breast cancer. Maybe YOU personally have. I saw on a billboard recently “breast cancer doesn’t wait until October.” So, while this awful disease gets a lot of exposure this month, please, please always remember to get your annual mammograms no matter what month it is. Even if you’ve already had breast cancer, it’s still so crucial to go annually. My mom had a double mastectomy in 2007 and I naively thought it “wasn’t possible” for her to get breast cancer again. This is your sign to remind all of the women in your life to schedule their mammograms!

As always, wishing you a happy and healthy month of October!

CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS JEJ Photos Jodie Brim Creative Megan Black Photography Photo Artistry by Melinda *others credited throughout accordingly

CONTENT EDITORS Kim Beane Meghan Corbett (Assistant)

SENIOR STAFF WRITER Carolyn Peterson

OTHER CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Debbie Barr Karen Cooper Elisa Coppede Angelia Cornatzer Candice Deal Martie Emory Anne Glenn Amy Hill Taryn Jerez Jean Marie Johnson Debbie Lanier Kelli Messick Susan Schabacker Renee Skudra Lauren Sephton Leslie Speas Erika Taylor Megan Taylor Sheridan Watkins *others credited throughout accordingly

GRAPHIC DESIGN & PRODUCTION Emerson Designs

• Once again, Trellis Supportive Care presents their amazing and inspirational Living Your Best Life Annual Speaker Series! Learn more on page 22.

• Girls’ Night Out will take place on Tuesday October 11th at ROAR in downtown Winston-Salem! Learn more and see photos from last month’s GNO event on pages 52-53!

Jodie Brim Creative

Brooke Eagle, Publisher

WEB DESIGN/ MAINTENANCE McIlwraith Enterprises, LLC

CONTACT ForsythWoman.com 888-892-3204

Forsyth Woman Disclaimer: Please note that the inclusion of stories and articles in Forsyth Woman magazine does not imply endorsement of products or people. The views of the authors are presented for information and entertainment only, and may not necessarily reflect the views of Forsyth Woman. Specifically, Forsyth Woman in no way endorses any claim associated with health and/or well being with respect to any particular person. We disclaim all warranties, express or implied, including, but not limited to, implied warranties of merchantability and fitness for a particular purpose. We will not be held responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any loss or damage that is caused or alleged to have been caused in connection with the use of, or reliance on, any content in this magazine. Forsyth Woman reserves the right to deny any advertisement or listing that does not meet Forsyth Woman standards. Submissions are welcome but unsolicited materials are not guaranteed to be returned. Forsyth Woman assumes no responsibility for information, products, services or statements made by advertisers or editorial contributors. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher is prohibited. ©2005 by Forsyth Woman, Inc.

the publisher perspective

Black Mountain Chocolate

66 COVER STORY 56 52 42

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Juicy Pulled Chicken Crispy Tacos

18

Living Your Best Life Annual Speaker Series

22

Migraine: How Much Do You Know?

36

Family Activities for the Fall Season

48

COVER STORY Black Mountain Chocolate: Simply Slow Down & Savor the Chocolate!

66

Bad Decision? Stress Could Be the Culprit

84

Compassionate Conflict

88

Women on the Move

108

Restoration Med Spa

Keeping It Real THE TIPPING POINT

BY DR. DEBBIE LANIER | PHOTO BY JODIE BRIM CREATIVE

Is it just me, or are you feeling the weight of the hour, too? So many significant things seem to be hanging in the balance. Governments and economies hang by a thread. Significant situations in our own lives feel increasingly fragile, too.

Speaking of something small that takes off and cannot be reversed…let’s talk ‘mustard seed.’ It’s one of the tiniest seeds in all of the botanical world. In fact, it’s smaller than a speck of pepper. For real! It would seem powerless to fight even a flea. YET, once this tiny but mighty seed takes root, it gradually inches toward that tipping point where it cannot be destroyed! (I’m telling you the truth!)

Our inability to squash the things that seek to squash us leaves us feeling small and weak. We lose steam, and the burden of it all makes us wonder why we keep trying. (If this is you, stay with me!)

Once that infinitesimal seed reaches that breakthrough moment, you can try stomping it down, burning it out, even tearing it up. Have at it! It’s not going anywhere!

Imagine for a moment that the daunting situation in your life sits on a scale. That dire circumstance hangs in the balance. No matter what you do, nothing changes. But hear me… that’s only what it FEELS like.

In reality, every small step in the right direction draws us closer to the tipping point of that scale. In one moment, what once seemed impossible slides toward “possible!” (Y’all! Every step in God’s direction tilts you closer to “possible!”)

Something that once seemed lesser now becomes GREATER! The situation incrementally gains momentum until the result becomes unstoppable! You discover the breaking point.

Actually, YOU DISCOVER THE BREAKTHROUGH POINT! (Big difference!)

Are you getting this?

A tipping point is that watershed moment which alters the trajectory of a thing. Something that once teetered in the balance now takes off in your favor and overtakes the obstacle that stood in your way.

And get this: once that tiny seed hits that threshold, it aggressively takes out everything in its way.

This minuscule mustard seed is the most feared plant in all of Israel because once it reaches that tipping point, it becomes indestructible!

Are we connecting the dots? Jesus is essentially saying, “When your Faith is in ME…not your skills, or experience, or connections…when your heart is wholly fixed on the King and His Kingdom...THEN look out because breakthrough is coming! No matter what it looks like in this moment, as you keep acting in Faith…your tipping point hastens.

And from there, you take out the thing that tried to take out you!” (Luke 13:18-19, Lanierian Translation) Friends, just as the mustard seed grows strong, secure, and able to withstand all conditions, God desires that your Faith in Him become that unstoppable!

Keep taking that next step. Keep believing even when nothing seems different. Keep trusting when you want to quit.

Step of Faith…by step of Faith…you inch closer to that tipping point when the Faith inside you becomes indestructible in all seasons and situations. From that place, all God has spoken over your life comes to pass and no one alive can stop it! Oh, Hallelujah!

For comments or prayer, contact Dr. Lanier at PastorDebbie@HopeCommunityChurch.tv.

Salem Plastic Surgery

I NS P I R AT I O N F RO M A ROU N D T H E WO R L D

BY MARTIE EMORY There’s nothing quite like a bit of that Windsor Jewelers magic when it comes to starting – or enhancing – your fine jewelry collection. With a rich history of tradition and timeless excellence known throughout North Carolina, Windsor Jewelers offers every type of precious gemstones and jewelry, and the finest customization available.

Classic, contemporary, and an artful variety of everything in between, Rob Simon has always been attracted to unique jewelry, bringing in new designers who will appeal to current customers, and undoubtedly attract new ones. In addition to many beloved U.S. designers, Windsor Jewelers also carries lines from all over the world, boasting stunningly beautiful options for a variety of tastes. Here are some favorites!

Designer Elizabeth Locke has had a lifelong fascination with antique jewelry from the Etruscans, Greeks, and Romans. Every year, she goes on a world-wide quest for unusual antiquities that she turns into her latest piece of jewelry.

Elizabeth is known for her luminous gemstones and Venetian Glass intaglios, which are all created in her signature 19k-yellow gold, and she hand picks every stone and personally designs every piece of jewelry herself. With two flagship stores – one in Boyce VA, and one in Manhattan – Elizabeth Locke is a woman-owned design firm with a bright business sense!

Ilias Lalaounis founded his line in Greece in the 1990s, and was inspired by the classical and Hellenistic art of his ancestors.

Responsible for reviving forgotten jewelry techniques such as granulaton, filigree, hand-weaving, and hand-hammering, his jewelry is both intricate and labor intensive.

Ilias believes in producing objects of beauty tied to the past, in his favorite rich 18- and 22-karat yellow gold. In 1998 he brought his four daughters to the helm of the company, aspiring to new heights of creativity. The sisters plan to make sure the Lalaouinis legacy will be passed on to future generations.

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Konstantinos Siolas founded his company in Athens, Greece, in 1993, drawing his inspiration from his passion for ancient Greek history, music, and fine art. He employs experienced goldsmiths who specialize in cutting patterns into metal, offering delicate detail to his complex designs. Each piece of jewelry is created with hard work, love, and passion in 18k-yellow gold and sterling silver, as well as with matte stones of opal and mother-of-pearl. Konstantino strives to evolve his collections each season to reach current collectors and new customers of all ages.

Lauren K designs her jewelry collection entirely around personally hand-picked gemstones set in 18k-yellow gold, with delicate diamond micro pave. She loves distinctive gemstones with character and flaws, making each piece of her jewelry unique. With such an abundance of striking gems, her collection is feminine, edgy, and bohemian, and proudly created in New York City, where Lauren resides.

Other international favorites featured at Windsor Jewelers include Jochen Pohl of Germany, known for rare gemstones and precious metals; Temple St. Clair – a beautiful mix of 18k-gold and colored gemstones; and Jude Frances, designer of brilliant cocktail rings and gold bangles with on-trend shapes and styles.

The Simon family has been joyfully celebrating traditions past and present since launching in 1986, having played a part in the lives of so many local families. Windsor Jewelers is honored to bring these talented designers – with their own nod to history – to both their North Carolina stores. Join them for an Elizabeth Locke Trunk Show December 7 at the Winston-Salem location, and a Lalaounis, Konstantino, & Lauren K Trunk Show October 28 in Charlotte, and October 29 in Winston-Salem.

Visit the Windsor Jewelers showroom at 526 South Stratford Road in WinstonSalem, 336-721-1768, or at their second location in Charlotte at Phillips Place, 704-556-7747.

For more information, visit Windsor-Jewelers.com, like them on Facebook and follow them on Instagram.

Novant Health

Hi! I’m Lauren. I’m a freelance writer, a food blogger and the official Forsyth Mags Foodie! Stay tuned each month to find everything from achievable dessert ideas to healthy, quick dinners that’ll happily feed the family. @brightmomentco | abrightmoment.com

BY LAUREN SEPHTON

Juicy Pulled Chicken Crispy Tacos These Juicy Pulled Chicken Crispy Tacos are my healthier take on Birria Tacos. An easy 10-step process, simple ingredients, and packed with flavor!

INGREDIENTS

• 1 lb Chicken Breast or Thighs • 1/2 Red Onion, thinly sliced • 2 Bell Peppers, thinly sliced • Juice if 1 Lemon • 1 tbsp. Olive Oil • 1 tsp Ground Cumin

INSTRUCTIONS

• 1 tsp Chili Powder • 1 tsp Garlic Powder • 1 tsp Black Pepper • 1/2 tsp Salt • 1/4 cup Cilantro, chopped • 14.5-oz Crushed Tomatoes • 6-8 Tortillas • 2 cups Mozzarella Cheese, shredded

1. In a large bowl, toss the chicken, red onion, bell peppers, lemon juice, ground cumin, salt, garlic powder, chili powder, and black pepper together.

2. In a large skillet over medium high heat, add the olive oil.

3. Sear the chicken and vegetables for 2-3 minutes of each side.

4. Add the crushed tomatoes and chopped cilantro, cover with a lid, and simmer 20-25 minutes (chicken should be fully cooked and tender to fork).

5. Shred the chicken with two forks.

Summer another 5 minutes.

6. Heat up a large cast iron skillet over medium high heat.

Press both sides of each tortilla into the chicken pan to coat in sauce.

7. Add tortillas to cook in the hot skillet for 1 minute on each side.

8. Add the cheese all over the tortilla and then a generous scoop of chicken on one side.

9. Fold the remaining cheese side of the tortilla over the chicken. Cook until crispy on both sides.

Repeat with remaining tortillas.

10. Enjoy warm!

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GOLDMAN CENTER for Facial Plastic Surgery

Goldman Center

108 Dornach Way | Advance, NC | (336) 245-9595 Kinderton Village – across from Bermuda Run NEAL D. GOLDMAN, MD Double Board Certified Facial Plastic Surgeon

717 Greenway Road | Suite A | Boone, NC | (828) 278-9230

FacialPlasticSurgeryNC.com

With Offices Serving the Piedmont & High Country

BY TARYN JEREZ

A monthly column that keeps its finger on the pulse of Forsyth’s artists and their inspiring stories!

This month’s featured artist, Vikki Vassar, is a multi passionate mixed media artist creating unique pieces that incorporate her love for nature, local flavor and all things pop culture. Vikki’s work invites viewers to come along for the ride of a one-of-a-kind creative journey.

Vikki Vassar | Mixed Media How would you describe your work? Fun and weird.

Nothing is ever exactly the same, and I work in a variety of mediums. Lately, however, I have been doing a fair amount of digital work. Given that my work experience for my entire working career has been some kind of retail, I take a very Lisa Frank-esque approach to things: Along with originals, I digitize and translate my work to stickers, prints, and I am always looking into other products.

What local landmarks have been your favorite to design? Oh, definitely the Silver Moon Saloon and the Shell Station. Those are two iconic Winston-Salem landmarks. The Silver Moon Saloon holds a special place in most folks’ hearts because it’s such a dive, but everyone there is so great. The Shell Station is a great piece of novelty architecture. There were only eight built nationwide, and ours is the last one standing, thanks to Preservation North Carolina.

What influences your art most? Most of my art stems from whatever I’m observing or learning about. I occasionally dive into Winston-Salem’s history for fun, and find things to draw there. For my non-Winston art, it’s more about what I’m doing at the moment. I like to work off of photos I’ve taken on my phone, so that’s why you see a lot of WinstonSalem, or a lot of nature. I love insects and mushrooms.

I grew up watching Masterpiece Mystery Theater on PBS with my parents - it was Ed Gorey’s illustrated introduction to the show that has stuck with me all these years.

You’ll see a lot of his influence in my work, along with pop art influences.

How have you evolved, personally, as an artist? My mindset about art has evolved a bit, but I continue to maintain that everyone is an artist - some just haven’t found their medium yet. I love to watch people explore to find that medium. Art is inclusive. As for the way I make art? It hasn’t changed. My mental process for art hasn’t changed. I don’t think that’s a bad thing at all - I think it means I’m consistent and I know what I like.

How do you carve out time to be creative? I make time when I am feeling creative. Either I’m working at home on my computer, or I bring my sketchbook where I am and doodle; art can be very portable.

What are you working on right now that excites you? Honestly, I’m taking a break right now. I believe artists need to practice self-care, and take breaks when they feel creatively tired. I hope to be in the Ardmore Art Walk coming up on Nov 5th and I am 100% looking forward to that.

What is one piece of advice you’d like to share with fellow artists? If you’re online, use your accounts to show the world what you’re doing!

Progress shots, videos, finished pieces… the exposure for artists relies heavily on the internet these days. Don’t be afraid of showing your errors and mistakes - it encourages others!

If you are interested in learning more about Vikki Vassar, you can follow her on Instagram and Facebook via @thatblondegirlvikki as well as find her work online at thatblondegirlvikki.com. You may also check out her work locally at Southern Charm at the Farm on October 8th and the Ardmore Art Walk on November 5th.

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Duke Eye Center

Women of the Piedmont/Triad are in for a double dose of female empowerment this fall. First, we will have an opportunity to hear from a renowned therapist and relationship guru, Nedra Tawwab, who will share valuable insights to help us all live our best lives. Second, we will see one of our community’s most inspiring female leaders, Winston-Salem Police Department Chief Catrina Thompson, receive the seventh annual Best Life Leadership award.

Both opportunities are part of the Living Your Best Life Speaker Series, hosted by Trellis Supportive Care. “We named this event Living Your Best Life to help spotlight our mission of helping people live fully and comfortably, making the most of every day,” shared Linda Darden, President and CEO of Trellis Supportive Care. “Each year I am thrilled with the level of expertise we bring to the region, and I’m eager to gain insights from this year’s speaker, Nedra Tawwab,” she continued.

ARE YOU READY TO START TAKING CARE OF YOU? If you are a people pleaser or have trouble setting boundaries in relationships, work life, or family life, you may find much of what Nedra Tawwab has to say life-changing. Her presentation will aim to help us all start building and maintaining better, healthier relationships.

Tawwab has practiced therapy for 14 years and is the founder and owner of the group therapy practice Kaleidoscope Counseling, based in Charlotte, NC. Her best-selling book: Set Boundaries, Find Peace – A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself, will be the focus of her presentation. Her philosophy is that a lack of boundaries and assertiveness underlie most relationship issues, and her gift is helping people create healthy relationships with themselves and others. She will share simple yet powerful tools to help – as the title of her book suggests – find peace and reclaim yourself.

THE BEST LIFE LEADERSHIP AWARD GOES TO…

Two Phenomenal Women.

Both Living Their Best Lives.

BY ANN GAUTHREAUX

Each year as part of the Living Your Best Life event, Trellis presents the Best Life Leadership Award to a community leader who exemplifies what it means to elevate the possibilities and potential of lives in the Triad. Winston-Salem Police Chief Thompson’s steadfast leadership and unyielding commitment to the community make her an ideal candidate for this recognition. By her example, she inspires others to make a positive difference in the world. As a leader, community volunteer, and advocate in the nonprofit world, she has worked to create a community that is indeed a better place to live your best life.

Funds raised directly benefit patients and families receiving hospice care. “We are thrilled to be back in person this year and look forward to the luncheon as a way to connect with the community,” shared Rosalie Bland, Director of Donor Relations. “We are also thrilled for the opportunity to present our Best Life Leadership Award to Catrina Thompson,” added Rosalie. Presenting the award to Chief Thompson will be last year’s award recipient, Wanda Starke.

The event is set for October 20 at the Benton Convention Center. Please visit www.BestLifeSeries.org for additional information and registration - or contact Jordan Helms with Trellis Supportive Care at (336) 331-1323 or by email at JHelms@trellissupport.org to reserve your seat!

Lewisville Laser

BY MEGAN TAYLOR Learning the history of my hometown has always been fascinating to me. Winston-Salem is a city with a longstanding history and familiar historic family names.

When you hear the names RJ Reynolds, Hanes, and Bowman Gray, certain businesses and legacies pop into your mind. You connect the Reynolds name with tobacco, Bowman Gray with racing, and Hanes with clothing. While driving through the Old Salem graveyard around Easter time, I started to wonder who were the families behind the names I saw on the prominent stones. Do you know the stories behind these connections and how these names appeared in the Camel City? Let’s take a look together at the history of the famous Winston-Salem families.

R.J. Reynolds family 1914

THE REYNOLDS FAMILY

While 1906 to 1924 may be known as the “Reynolds Era” to many, Richard Joshua Reynolds actually started in the tobacco industry in 1875. Reynolds’ small tobacco factory grew and was incorporated as The R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company in 1888, paving the way for industrialization in the south.

In 1905, Reynolds married Katharine Smith, who had previously worked as his private secretary. Once married, they moved into a house on West Fifth Street in Winston and had four children, Dick, Mary, Nancy, and Smith. Katharine became a partner to R.J. in many ways, not just as his wife. She gave him advice on business matters, as well as private matters. The creation of the Reynolda House came from Katharine’s efforts and determination. After R.J. purchased the land, 1,067 acres to be exact, Katharine took on the task of building a self-sufficient country estate. Her ideas came from the American Country House movement. Katharine hired an architect and landscape engineers to design a large-scale bungalow, village, and farm.

Today, the Reynolda House Museum of American Art and R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company are just two of the legacies honoring the family’s wealth, name, and contributions to Winston-Salem. In fact, the R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company is the second-largest tobacco company in the United States.

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THE GRAY FAMILY

The Gray family’s name is also connected to the Reynolds family.

Bowman Gray, Sr was a former president and chairman of the R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company and a major benefactor of the Wake Forest University School of Medicine. Bowman Gray, Sr was the son of James Gray, one of the founders of Wachovia Bank, and had two sons, Bowman Gray, Jr and Gordon Gray. His sons both turned into philanthropists and built upon the Gray family legacy. Bowman Gray, Jr was a tobacco executive who started as a salesman at R.J. Reynolds when his father was president.

During his time at the company, he was promoted to many different positions, eventually becoming the president of the company from 1957 to 1959 and then chairman of the board and chief executive officer. Under his leadership, R.J. Reynolds Tobacco Company grew, contributed to cancer research, and expanded employee benefits. Bowman Gray, Jr gave back to numerous nonprofits during his life and was involved with many fundraising projects, cementing his and his family’s name into Winston-Salem history.

THE HANES FAMILY

Born in Davie County, John Wesley Hanes is one of the main patriarchs of the Hanes family. In 1738, Philip Hohns (Hanes is the phonetic spelling) and his son Marcus first arrived in Pennsylvania from Germany. About 10 years later, Marcus and his wife joined the Moravian church in Lancaster, PA. In 1774, Marcus, his wife, and their 10 children moved to Friedberg, an area near the Moravian settlement of Salem in North Carolina. Over a hundred years later and after the Civil War, Marcus’ great, great grandson, John Wesley Hanes, joined forces with his brother, Pleasant Henderson Hanes, as well as a friend, and created P.H. Hanes and Company.

The company’s purpose was to manufacture and establish a wagon trade in tobacco. The idea proved to be successful and they partnered with Dulin and Booe in Mocksville. The company eventually sold their business to James B. Duke’s American Tobacco Company trust through R.J. Reynolds. Once out of the world of tobacco, John Wesley Hanes and Pleasant Henderson Hanes went into knitwear. Pleasant and his sons established P.H. Hanes Knitting Company and John Wesley formed the Shamrock Hosiery Mill. In 1914, the company became known as Hanes Hosiery Mill and was the world’s largest producer of women’s seamless nylon hosiery. To date, the Hanes brands are still the world’s largest apparel brand.

When looking at three of the most well-known families of Winston-Salem, one can’t help but think they all have one thing in common - a connection to R.J. Reynolds. Our city’s history is filled with many more famous families, however, the names Bowman Gray, Reynolds, and Hanes will always ring a bell with people throughout the world.

Lyndhurst

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We are in the Novant & Atrium Health Wake Forest Baptist Networks.

SHERIFF BOBBY KIMBROUGH SERVING OUR COMMUNITY AND ITS CITIZENS

BY CAROLYN S PETERSON | PHOTOS BY MEGAN BLACK

KEEPING THE FUTURE GENERATION FOCUSED ON EDUCATION

Sheriff Kimbrough knows the importance of keeping the youth of the community engaged in education and informed of the consequences of their actions. Sergeant Butch Moore, FCSO Community Outreach, has seen firsthand how the sheriff steps up for those at risk of falling through the cracks of society.

When Sheriff Bobby Kimbrough took office in 2018, he faced many of the same challenges law enforcement across the country face, like crime, school safety and an increasing community drug problem; however, he had no idea the challenges that were ahead for our community with the country, county and city on lockdown, much of two years, due to Covid-19. A whole new set of concerns and uncharted territory lie ahead, but he took his role on with a dedication and commitment to making our community safe and giving its citizens a voice.

On November 8th, Sheriff Kimbrough will be on the ballot for re-election, and the work and time he has put into his role in Forsyth County has made and continues to make a difference in our community. From those who have worked by his side for the past four years, to those who have seen their lives improved with the Sheriff’s Office under his leadership, the accolades go on and on for this man of the people.

SEEING LAW ENFORCEMENT THROUGH FRESH EYES

Captain Charlene Warren, Commander of Operational Services for the Forsyth County Law Enforcement Detention Center (FCLEDC), one of three, has been in her role for more than 28 years, working with three different Forsyth County sheriffs. “Bobby Kimbrough came into our law enforcement family four years ago with a clean slate and fresh eyes. He had a vision, and if we didn’t agree or had reservations, he allowed us to have a voice without repercussions. Sheriff Kimbrough truly listened to our concerns and did everything he could to make working conditions even better. He knew very little about the detention side of FCSO, but he took the time to listen and learn, realizing that the Detention Facility is a city within our city. He makes rounds throughout the facility and listens to the residents. Sheriff Kimbrough also makes sure that the staff is doing well and never fails to express his appreciation for what we do. He has mentored each of us into being better people and, from the beginning, has called the Sheriff’s Office the ‘Office of the People’,” said Captain Warren.

Sheriff Kimbrough has a special passion for the youth of our county, and, in the past four years, he has gone above and beyond working with youth.

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“Through the Community Outreach within the FCSO, we work at building relationships with people, meeting their needs and establishing trust with people, especially the youth. There’s so much out there today seeking to destroy our kids, and meeting them where they are is important.

From being hungry, to needing a bed, to dental care, to backpack and school supplies, we have so many kids in need, and Sheriff Kimbrough has taken the lead in addressing concerns with our youth. FCSO is involved with organizations in our community, like Samaritan Ministries, Camp Hanes and Second Harvest, to mention a few, to meet the needs of our youth and their families. We’re all very aware of the problems of drugs and addiction in our community, so Sheriff Kimbrough started the Never Walk Alone event, where we help residents of Forsyth County learn about both the disease of addiction and the many resources available in our community. During this event, multiple community leaders and local organizations who address addiction come and give people not only hope, but information on recovery, education and the resources they have available to them locally,” Sgt. Moore commented. Beyond those that work with Sheriff Kimbrough, local residents have been able to see a difference the last four years.

A RESIDENT’S PERSPECTIVE

Mattie Young has been a resident in her Cleveland Avenue neighborhood for more than 50 years and has seen first-hand how the presence of law enforcement affects her community.

“Since Sheriff Kimbrough has been in office, he has made sure there are deputies patrolling my neighborhood, which has made a difference in crime. The deputies go out of their way to meet the residents, like myself, and let us know they are here for us and that we can talk to them anytime about our concerns,” Mrs. Young stated.

As Sheriff Kimbrough looks toward another four years, upon re-election, he wants to continue to work toward a better tomorrow. “To me, education is the true emancipator,” said Sheriff Kimbrough.

“Education frees you and allows you to accomplish many things that otherwise you could not believe, much less achieve. People literally die from lack of education, which is why it is so important that we do all we can to provide pathways to education for our community. I can visibly see in the community the trust that we at the FCSO have nurtured the last four years. Through the trust and dedication of the FCSO family members and our community, I have had the privilege of implementing a variety of new events, initiatives and programs in my time as Sheriff. The entire FCSO family has been busy over the last four years, and we continue to move forward. We remain committed to reinforcing the structures we have built, while enhancing and multiplying the ways in which we are able to both protect and serve our community.”

RE-ELECT SHERIFF BOBBY KIMBROUGH

We Are Better Together.

Let’s Stay Together.

Bobby F. Kimbrough, Jr. Sheriff, Forsyth County, NC Bobby Kimborough Proven Leadership.

Passionate Commitment.

Purposeful Results.

I am honored to have served Forsyth County, NC as Sheriff for the last three years.

Everything that we promised in the first run for election, we have delivered.

From 21st Century Technology to building bridges within the community, from leveraging resources to maximize our capabilities to collaborating with both entity and grassroots leaders - our work has created a formidable blueprint that is making an impact not only in our county but around the state of North Carolina.

As your Sheriff, the Office of the People has made strides, broken many barriers, and elevated law enforcement in Forsyth County in many ways. We are just getting started. I ask for your vote in 2022. Most immediately, I ask for your financial support to run this race and win.

Donate Today at bit.ly/DonateKimbrough2022.

#KEEPKIMBROUGH #KIMBROUGH2022 #BETTERTOGETHER Paid For By The Committee To Re-Elect Sheriff Bobby F. Kimbrough, Jr.

The Wild Horses of the Outer Banks

BY MEGAN TAYLOR

There are many unique features that make up North Carolina’s coast.

This area is known for its beaches, for being first in flight, the setting for multiple Nicholas Sparks’ books, and home to historic lighthouses and the Battleship North Carolina. It is also home to the chain of barrier islands off the coast in Dare County which are commonly known as the Outer Banks.

Beginning at the border of Virginia and going down North Carolina’s coast for about 120 miles, the Outer Banks consists of Corolla, Kitty Hawk, Kill Devil Hills, Nags Head, Roanoke Island, Hatteras Island, Ocracoke Island, and other islands and towns. As for beaches, you have Carvoa, Currituck, Rodanthe, Avon, and others. Just like the other areas of the coast, the Outer Banks have their own treasured characteristics, including the wild horses.

Commonly known as the Corolla Wild Horses due to their location, the wild horses have been a favorite tourist attraction for decades and have lived in the area since the 16th century. Along with the majority of horses living in the northern portion of the Outer Banks, some more feral horses have been seen towards the southern islands in the area. According to researchers, the current wild horses share similar DNA and genetics with the Colonial Spanish Mustangs. This type of horse originated in Spain, and the coast’s current wild horses are said to have arrived with Spanish explorers in the 1500s and after. The first herd is believed to have arrived with Spanish explorer Lucas Vasquez de Allyon and his expedition.

Today, the Colonial Spanish Mustang or Horse is the state horse of North Carolina. They are also listed as a critically endangered and nearly extinct breed due to being one of the oldest and rarest breeds left in the world.

Another theory as to how the horses arrived is that they arrived by themselves. Yes, you read that right. A shipwreck of a Spanish expedition caused a boat to sink and as a result the crew had to get rid of extra heavy goods, which included horses. Once displaced from the boat, the horses made their way to the mainland and formed their own herds. However the wild horses made it to shore, one thing is for sure - the present-day horses’ ancestors came from Spain in the early 1500s.

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To survive, the wild horses dig for fresh water and swim from island to island for fresh grazing areas. In addition, they eat a diet of sea oats, coarse grasses, acorns, persimmons, and other vegetation native to the Outer Banks. Note to self - if you visit the Outer Banks and see the wild horses, please don’t feed them. Eating non-native foods can cause digestion issues and possible death. In fact, it is illegal to get within 50 feet of a wild horse. Volunteers and employees of various non-profits, including the National Park Service and the Corolla Wild Horse Fund, help provide for and protect the herds of horses, although the animals do mainly live, breed, and survive on their own. In fact, a herd can roam up to 25 miles a day from place to place. Sadly, the population of wild horses has steadily declined throughout the years. In the mid-1920s, 5,000 - 6,000 horses lived in the Outer Banks. Today, only about 100 horses are in the northern part. The decline is a result of increased human development and movement to the area. Fun fact: a helicopter count is taken once a year to track the horses.

There are many opportunities for tourists to catch a glimpse of a wild horse. If you are traveling on your own, it is suggested to have a 4WD car that is suitable for off-road driving. Tour and rental companies are located throughout the islands if you don’t already have this feature on your vehicle. Wild horse tours are also available and are actually the best chance to see the animals. Jeep, kayak, ATV, and boat tours are just some of the options.

The mystique of the wild horses of the Outer Banks have a history that’s longstanding and valuable to the Tarheel state.

Seeing these beautiful creatures should be on every North Carolinian’s bucket list - it is definitely on mine.

After seeing the Outer Banks, continue your trip to the coast of Virginia and see the ponies of Assateague and Chinconteague.

Barn on Country Club

Winston-Salem’s Best Kept Secret!

Home Decor | Artwork Custom Built Tables, Benches & Much More!

336-661-8400 | thebarnoncountryclub.com

4886 Country Club Road Winston-Salem | Closed Monday, Tuesday-Saturday 10am-6pm, Sunday 12-6pm

Haunted Carolina Places to Visit

BY ELISA WALLACE COPPEDE

North Carolina is a state rich in history, with countless fascinating stories that go back to colonial times. However, not all the stories end happily.

Numerous anecdotes end with mystery and some with murder. Many haunted locations are within driving distance from Winston-Salem. With fall season in full swing, and Halloween right around the corner, plan a trip to view one or all of these terrifying yet enthralling sites. Let’s learn about a few of the most haunted North Carolina locations and begin planning a spooktacular trip today!

The Devil’s Tramping Grounds, Siler City, NC

Teach’s Hole, Ocracoke Island, NC This location requires you to plan a weekend trip, as it is in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. However, this site is easily one of the most haunted locations to visit. Plus, the pirate enthusiasts will love the story that comes with Teach’s Hole. According to the Thrillist article, “The Most Haunted Places in All of North Carolina,” by Erin Breeden, Teach’s Hole is a small cove located on Ocracoke Island, named after Edward Teach, aka “Blackbird.” In 1718, this was the final location, where Teach was captured, and beheaded. Rumor has it that to this day, his headless body can be seen walking the beach at night, looking to reunite with his missing head.

The title of this location is shocking enough! Our next stop is a short 56-minute drive from downtown Winston-Salem. The site itself is a foot-wide bare path forming a perfect circle forty feet in diameter.

What is scary about this path, is the legend that follows it. According to the article, “10 hair-raising haunted destinations for North Carolina travelers,” by Todd Wetherington, “Regional legend supports that Satan frequents the area on his nightly walks, pacing the circle as he contemplates his nefarious deeds.” Normal vegetation surrounds the circle, but only a wiry grass grows inside it, with no vegetation found on the path itself. Many visitors claim to also see red glowing eyes in the circle, especially at nightfall.

The Mayo House, Tarboro, NC

Lydia’s Bridge, Greensboro, NC

For a visit to the Mayo House, be prepared for another short road trip, manageable within a days’ time. (Tarboro is a 2 hour and 40-minute drive from Winston.) Regional accounts maintain that the house was owned by the respected Mayo Family. One night, Mr. Mayo completely snapped. In a fit of rage, he murdered his entire family, including the family dog.

Afterwards, Mayo hanged himself from a noose off one of the rafters. Visitors claim, upon arriving you are welcomed by a dog in the front yard, who will chase you to the porch.

Once there, the entire family will beckon you to come inside.

Should you dare go inside, the door will slam shut behind you, and suddenly the family vanishes. The only thing left now is the sound of an old noose, swinging above your head.

One of the closest locations from Winston-Salem to visit is Lydia’s Bridge.

Legend maintains that if you drive down US 70-A, in Greensboro, you will pass a sweeping curve which will lead to an overgrown underpass. It is by this underpass that many drivers claim to see a young woman in a white evening dress. This underpass is “Lydia’s Bridge.” According to Breeden, “Over the years, many drivers have claimed to give her a ride, and every time the story is the same.” Lydia climbs into the back seat of the car and talks about a dance she just attended. “She gives an address not too far away and for the rest of the ride stays quiet but looks concerned.” Once the driver stops to let her out, she is gone. Legend supports that Lydia died in a car crash on her way home from a high-school dance, and her grief-stricken mother never left the house after. They say she stayed in every night until she died, waiting for her daughter to come back home.

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4961 S Main Street, Winston-Salem Monday - Friday 8:00am - 5:30pm

On the Road Again:

Florida Keys

BY AMY HILL

Florida is a tough state to cover in just seven days alone. To best capture everything the Sunshine State has to offer, we’ll focus on one region at a time. First, we’ll head to Florida’s southernmost islands. Here’s how to spend seven days in the beautiful Florida Keys.

Day 1: Find Your Way to the Keys

Key West International Airport (EYW) is the most convenient location to fly into in order to access the Florida Keys.

If flights to and from are too pricey or too limited, another popular airport visitors use to access the Florida Keys is Miami International Airport (MIA). Depending on where your accommodation lies, MIA might be closer, as Key Largo is only an hour away.

Key West, on the other hand, is a whopping nine hours from Miami. Don’t even think about skipping a rental car for this trip, as accessing everything the Keys have to offer is nearly impossible without one. Those craving nightlife are likely to find desirable, although pricey, accommodations in Key West, while those seeking a more centrally-located accommodation will find more affordable options in Islamorada, Marathon, or even Key Largo (for those wary of straying too far off the Florida mainland).

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Day 2: Dry Tortugas National Park

When I first read about Dry Tortugas National Park, I was stunned that I hadn’t heard about it sooner. Often overlooked by tourists, as it requires traveling by plane or ferry to visit, Dry Tortugas sits nearly 70 miles west of Key West in the Gulf of Mexico. What makes this treasure a must-see is historic Fort Jefferson surrounded by crystal blue waters, sea turtles, coral reefs, and seabirds.

Day-trippers receive guided tours of Fort Jefferson and have the option to kayak within the park’s crystal, calm waters. Adventurous travelers can also camp overnight, although they are responsible for bringing along all necessary camping supplies.

Day 3: Robbie’s of Islamorada

Robbie’s of Islamorada has earned its beloved reputation in the Keys as the number one place for giant tarpon feeding.

Try your hand at feeding jumping fish that can grow up to 8-feet in length, and weigh between 30 and 80 pounds on average.

Robbie’s also serves as a hub for fishing trips of all kinds, including night fishing trips, shark fishing, backcountry fishing, and much more. If you’re hungry, order fresh fish tacos, a bowl of conch chowder, and a frozen pina colada from the waterfront Hungry Tarpon Restaurant to cool off in the Florida heat.

Day 4: Wildlife Watching

Animal lovers will find no shortage of activities in the Florida Keys, as wildlife and opportunities for birdwatching are in abundance. In the Lower Florida Keys, the National Key Deer Refuge affords visitors the opportunity to spot adorable key deer that are unique to the region. In Marathon, register for an educational program with the Turtle Hospital in order to tour the facility, learn about sea turtles, and feed long-term turtle residents under the supervision of employees.

Day 5: Beach Day

While the Florida Keys aren’t known primarily for their stretches of sandy beaches like other tropical destinations such as Hawaii or the Caribbean Islands, there are a number of sandy beaches throughout the Keys that are ideal for relaxing by the turquoise sea. Sombrero Beach in Marathon is an excellent public beach with volleyball and picnic facilities, in addition to being a great spot to see turtle nesting during the months of April to October. On Key West, Smathers Beach is a popular tourist beach with plenty of sand to go around.

Day 6: Bahia Honda State Park

Big Pine Key’s Bahia Honda State Park is one of the top state parks in the Florida Keys, packed with sandy beaches, boat tours, camping facilities, and birdwatching. Visitors who pay the entrance and parking fees are able to rent kayaks, hike nature trails, snorkel or scuba dive, and purchase snacks and souvenirs. Take a stroll across the picturesque Bahia Honda Railroad Bridge, built between 1905 and 1912, that was an essential portion of the East Coast Railway in the Bahia Honda Channel.

Day 7: Catch Your Flight

Whether you’re departing from EYW or MIA, be sure to give yourself plenty of time for potential traffic delays in order to make it through airport security and head home. If you have time before your flight, it’s never too early to stop along the road at a local cafe or restaurant for a slice of key lime pie for one last treat before your return to reality.

Evelyn Rose

S H O P E V E LY N R O S E B O U T I Q U E . C O M 916 Burke Street Winston-Salem, NC | Tuesday-Friday 11-6, Saturday 11-5, Sunday & Monday Closed @theevelynroseboutique

THE SPARKLE & SHINE YOU DESERVE!

BY MARTIE EMORY, PHOTOS BY MEGAN BLACK

soar, and she’s an avid supporter of other local small business owners in the area.

“We sincerely cherish the many friendships we have made from our clientele base,” she says. “Most of them have been with us from the very beginning!”

The Your First Class Cleaning team offers weekly, bi-weekly, and monthly cleaning services, as well as move-in and move-out cleanings, or even just a one-time cleaning for special circumstances or a family event. The team services both residential and commercial clients, as well as working regularly with apartments and new construction in the area.

Local realtors are also among their many clients, and Brandy is actually a realtor herself, with Reel Realty in Kernersville.

Nearly 12 years ago, entrepreneur, realtor – and busy mom! – Brandy McMillian realized she was weary of always being on someone else’s schedule every single day of the week. It was time for her “dream agenda” to receive a muchneeded update and definitely more flexibility, adding in time for ball games and school activities with her children.

“I really wanted to be with my kids when they were sick without the worry of not getting paid or making up missed time away from work,” says Brandy.

She enthusiastically launched Your First Class Cleaning in Winston-Salem, a service-based business that allows Brandy to fill a need in the community she is truly passionate about – waking up, or coming home to, a sparkling clean home!

Without a doubt, we all agree!

“Honestly, when I first started I was a nervous wreck!” she says. “Would I make it all work? I truly believe word-of-mouth and consistent customer referrals are absolutely everything when it comes to a business.”

Brandy is also convinced community effort and involvement are what make a new small business

“I did a great deal of move-in and move-out cleanings for realtors before I became licensed in the cleaning industry, and it has really helped to be able to offer our services to even more clients in the real estate industry. It was a nice way to bring the two fields together,” says Brandy.

When asked what she feels sets her business apart from the others that homeowners, apartment dwellers, and business owners have to choose from in the Winston-Salem area, Brandy emphasizes her team’s goal of impressing the customer at every opportunity, no matter how small the gesture might seem.

“That includes the quality of our service, as well as the ability of my staff to go above and beyond to help each client, no matter what their situation is, and always provide top-notch customer service and complete satisfaction.”

Her amazing staff stands behind that promise, and as the business owner, Brandy knows she would be lost without such a supportive team. She also realizes every company – especially a small business – is based on human relationships. So she has created Your First Class Cleaning to be a company based on trust and respect for one another – and empathy for all of their clientele!

If your home or business needs the special touch of Your First Class Cleaning, give them a call at 336-409-1133 or email yourfirstclasscleaning@gmail.com.

Fraleigh Boutique

Fraleigh’s helps you stay trendy and fashionable at any age!

336-766-7440 | FraleighsBoutiqueNC.com Monday-Friday 10am-5pm | Saturday 10am-4pm | 2626 Lewisville-Clemmons Rd. Clemmons, NC 27012

Migraine: How Much Do You Know (Take our quiz and find out!) BY DEBORAH BARR Migraine disease...maybe you know someone who has it, or maybe you even have it yourself.

But how much do you really know about it? Take our True/False Quiz to find out! Decide if each statement below is true or false and then see the answers at the bottom.

5. TRUE. After a migraine, many people have a “migraine hangover,” also known as brain fog. They may feel distracted, find it hard to concentrate, or have trouble thinking clearly. Brain fog can also occur up to 48 hours before a migraine begins, or during an attack, or in between attacks.

TRUE OR FALSE? PLACE A T OR F IN EACH BLANK.

6. FALSE. While there are many effective treatments for managing migraine, there is no cure yet.

1. ___ Migraine is a contagious disease.

2. ___ Migraine affects women, but not men or children.

3. ___ Migraine is just a bad headache.

4. ___ A short night’s sleep can trigger a migraine attack for some people.

5. ___ Some people have “brain fog” after a migraine attack.

6. ___ People with migraine disease can be cured.

7. ___ A migraine attack can occur in phases.

8. ___ Migraine attacks never last long.

9. ___ A migraine aura occurs because of electrical activity in the brain.

10. __ Migraine disease is diagnosed with a brain scan.

ANSWERS

1. FALSE. Migraine disease is not contagious.

It does, however, often run in families. If one parent has migraine, each child has a 50% chance of having it too. If both parents have migraine, each child has a 75% chance of inheriting migraine disease.

2. FALSE. Migraine disease affects three times more women than men, but anyone at any age can have migraine. According to the American Migraine Foundation, about 40 million Americans have migraine disease—1 in 5 women, 1 in 16 men, and 1 in 11 children.

7. TRUE. A migraine attack can occur in four distinct phases.

Not everyone experiences all four phases; some people only have one or two phases.

• Prodrome: a painless warning that a migraine is coming. About 30-40% of migraine sufferers experience prodrome. Hours to days before a migraine, people may feel sluggish, irritable, depressed, and have food cravings, yawning, constipation, diarrhea, or brain fog.

• Aura: a second warning phase that lasts from 5-60 minutes. It is most often visual: flashes of light, colors, zig zag shapes, or blind spots. Some people hear sounds that aren’t really there, such as footsteps or a ticking clock. For others, aura is numbness or tingling in a hand or near the lips. Some have trouble speaking or have weakness on one side of the body. Still others smell odors that aren’t there. About 30% have aura.

Some do not go on to the headache phase.

• Headache: the phase most people think of when they hear the word migraine. Along with a pulsing headache that can be severe and long-lasting, people may experience any of the various debilitating symptoms described in #3 above.

• Postdrome: the “migraine hangover” that about 80% of people experience after the headache phase has ended. People may feel extreme joy, tiredness, depression, scalp tenderness, body aches, or brain fog.

8. FALSE. A migraine attack can be as brief as a few hours or last as long as three days.

9. TRUE. A migraine aura is preceded by a wave of electrical activity in the brain called cortical spreading depression.

It flows across the brain from back to front. In the back of the brain where sight is controlled, it may create the visual disturbances of aura.

3. FALSE. A migraine attack is much more than a bad headache. The throbbing, pounding, or pulsating headache is just one symptom of this debilitating brain disease. Other symptoms vary from person to person but can include nausea and/or vomiting, hypersensitivity to light, sound, touch or odors, fatigue, dizziness, hot flashes, chills, insomnia, or tearing eyes.

10. FALSE. There is no blood test, brain scan, or any other test that can diagnose migraine disease. Doctors reach a diagnosis based on family history, the patient’s symptoms, and their answers to specific questions about how their pain impacts their daily life.

4. TRUE. A trigger is anything that sets off a migraine. Getting too little (or too much) sleep can trigger a migraine for some people. Other common triggers are stress, missing a meal, smoke, red wine, or weather changes.

To learn more about migraine, visit https://americanmigrainefoundation.org/

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How many questions did you get right?

Give yourself 10 points for each right answer!

Deborah Barr is a patient educator in the Comprehensive Headache Program at Atrium Health Wake Forest Baptist.

Brookridge Retirement

SUPPORTING FINANCIAL WELLNESS IN THE WORKPLACE

BY MARTIE EMORY

As the oldest financial institution founded in Winston-Salem still in existence today, Piedmont Federal Savings Bank continues to keep the mission of its founders intact. Back in 1903, those forward-thinking business leaders made a pledge to serve their local market with unsurpassed customer service, and they would be proud of how the Bank is fulfilling that commitment in 2022.

As part of the expansion of that customer service, Eric Hermanson, Director of Business Partner Relations, has introduced Piedmont Plus, a new financial wellness employee benefit program, built around supporting the employees of local businesses and nonprofit groups. The program centers on financial health, as well as savings and perks on banking services, which benefit individuals, companies, and the overall community.

“Financial stress in the workplace is on the rise, leading to increased absenteeism and decreased performance, to name only a few of its effects,” says Eric. “This program is a financial wellness employee benefit at no cost to the company or the employees, and it is appropriate for any local business in the Triad. Those businesses and organizations aren’t required to bank with Piedmont Federal, though many of them do.”

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FINANCIAL WELLNESS “We offer online, self-directed financial wellness in the form of short videos on pertinent topics such as budgeting, planning for an emergency, starting a new job, moving your family, and many more,” explains Eric. “Piedmont Federal also offers onsite, in-person financial wellness seminars designed to educate company employees about choices that crucially impact their day-to-day financial habits. Topics include building or improving credit and credit scores, preventing financial scams or identity theft, aging in place, and others.

Piedmont Federal can also customize financial seminars, based on employee input and requests.

One-on-one financial counseling is also available.

BANKING SERVICES AND PERKS Piedmont Federal offers free checking with no minimum balance requirement, no ATM fees anywhere (domestic or international), unlimited branch access, and the ease of electronic banking.

Accounts can be opened online and onsite, and other benefits include a credit towards closing costs when an employee obtains a mortgage with Piedmont Federal. We offer consumer loan and line of credit rate discounts, a no-fee home equity line of credit, and a rate discount on an overdraft line of credit. Also, since we do not sell our mortgages and keep them in-house, we are able to provide loans for acreage, log homes, non-traditional homes, second homes and family member loans with primary residence rates, and a no PMI first-time homebuyer program.

Workplace banking allows Piedmont Federal to bring customer service and convenience right to your company.

Piedmont Federal Savings Bank has 10 branch locations in the Triad and the Western Piedmont.

Learn more about the Piedmont Plus program by contacting Eric at 336-770-1127, via email at ehermanson@piedmontfederal.com, or online at piedmontfederal.bank.

Piedmont Federal Savings Bank

Sweet Dream Designs for Master Bedrooms We all deserve a little luxury in our day-to-day lives, and there’s no better to place to start than your master bedroom. Even when you’re redecorating, the bedroom often slips to the bottom of the list. So, start thinking dreamy: Don’t leave your bedroom as a last thought. Do give it – and yourself – some well-deserved love.

Let’s consider your master bedroom one of the most important rooms of the home and let’s update it to bring about instant Zen as it becomes your haven for relaxation and peaceful slumber.

Now, let’s talk linens. We make it a pleasure to select your new linens and bedding accessories with one easy visit to our retail store. Just imagine the possibilities!

Does a romantic bed straight from a Tennessee Williams novel sound appealing? From our collection of luxury lines, Bella Notte has you covered with its scalloped edges, all-over embroidery, rich silk or cotton velvets, ruffles, lace, and buttery feel linens.

These irresistible linens are manufactured with non-toxic dyes and only get softer with each washing.

If a crisp, more tailored look is your style, then I recommend Sferra, an Italian bedding we carry that uses premium Egyptian cotton so fine it is referred to as “The Queen of the Nile.” With double-faced sheeting, the reverse side is as sleek as the front side, delivering elegance with easy care and durability.

Peacock Alley believes in the beauty of simplicity enhanced by exquisite detail, and if you prefer a classic look, this bedding line will catch your eye. We offer several selections of beautiful Matelassé coverlets and fine Italian linens in a variety of shades from neutrals to vibrant colors to cotton prints from Portugal.

We also carry Eastern Accents and once you’ve chosen your favorite among our fine linens, we can also custom make bedding including dust ruffles and pillows. Call us at June DeLugas Interiors and let your next design project be the creation of a completely new dream bedroom!

Visit our retail store and design center in Clemmons. While thinking about redoing your master bedroom with new bed linens, also think about your next remodel project. It is that time of year to start planning. We turn-key remodel projects, as well as customize and order home furnishings for your home.

We are here to help. A great team awaits you at June DeLugas Interiors, Inc. God Bless!

PHOTO COURTESY OF ©AMBELLAHOME

June

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2018, 2017, 2016, 2016, 2013

PHOTO COURTESY OF ©AMBELLAHOME

Dear June Interiors

Beautiful Bedding TURNKEY REMODELING AND INTERIOR DESIGN! FROM START TO FINISH AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN! LIGHTING • FLOORING • FURNITURE • WINDOW TREATMENTS • AND MORE!

junedelugasinteriors.com North Carolina’s Premier Interior Design Firm | 2575 Old Glory Road, Clemmons | 336-778-1030

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Wood & Thread strives to support fellow local boutiques and small businesses.

In fact, the boutique re-established its pop-up roots in 2020 by setting up outdoor shops in parking lots alongside other small businesses to circumvent the challenges imposed by local restrictions and social distancing guidelines. Having the opportunity to work with fellow small business owners gave Theresa and her team the opportunity to network and gain inspiration for Wood & Thread. This fall and winter, you can expect to see more Wood & Thread pop-ups throughout the community.

If you’re searching for the perfect part-time gig, Wood & Thread Boutique is currently hiring for weekday and weekend help. Bring your resume to the Boutique and speak to Theresa and her team to apply in-person.

Ready to start shopping? Visit woodandthreadboutique.com to view store hours and current products online, and follow @woodandthreadboutique on Instagram to stay posted on the boutique’s newest items. Check out Wood & Thread on Facebook and stop by the store in-person to see what this Brookstown boutique has to offer.

B O U T I Q U E

As the owner of Wood & Thread Boutique, Theresa Burton is always staying updated on the latest trends to find the perfect inventory to sell with her shop’s boho chic ambiance in mind. Customers can rest assured that Wood & Thread carries tops with short and long sleeves year-round, while loungewear remains a shop staple as working from home is on the rise. Neutral colors fill the racks at Wood & Thread, which are must-haves for versatile wardrobes and women on the go.

Since moving the boutique to its current location in 2018, Theresa has grown to love the neighborhood’s family-like atmosphere and has thoroughly enjoyed immersing herself and the boutique in the Brookstown community. After establishing pop-up shops for over a year, Theresa decided to snag a spot to open the boutique in Downtown Winston-Salem - a spot she had been eyeing for months at 301 Brookstown Avenue. As it turns out, Wood & Thread was a perfect fit for the Brookstown area, as residents of nearby apartment complexes, convention center visitors, guests of the Brookstown Inn, and students from Salem College and UNCSA frequent the shop. Wood & Thread’s small business neighbors have welcomed Theresa and her team with open arms, along with welcoming the new foot traffic that Wood & Thread has attracted to the area. Theresa has been touched by how much the community has uplifted the boutique through its ups and downs, and is forever grateful for the support of nearby local businesses, friends, and customers, old and new.

T H R E A D

As crisp fall weather approaches, many shoppers are looking to upgrade their autumn wardrobes and stock up on festive home décor all at once.

Why drive from store to store when you can find trendy maxi dresses, jackets and outerwear, and giftable décor in the same shop? WinstonSalem’s Wood & Thread Boutique carries a taste of everything for local fashion lovers looking to keep up with fall appearances. Located on charming Brookstown Avenue, Wood & Thread Boutique is the ideal stop for a Saturday morning shopping day, complete with artisan coffee and baked goods from nearby local coffee shops.

In need of a quick pick-me-up during your lunch break on a stressful Monday afternoon?

Browse the shelves at Wood & Thread for unique accessories and delicious smelling candles sporting quirky and witty sayings that will lend you a much-needed laugh.

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T H E

O D

F I N D

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BY AMY HILL | PHOTOS BY HAILEY PORT

@womenownednc

Ivy & Dust

Kayla Berry Realtor Kaylaberry.exprealty.com | @kbbbroker 336.528.3333 | kaylaberryhomes@gmail.com

ivyandduststudio.com @ivyanddust

Mom-Owned | Kid-Approved | Styles for All Ages

Pigtails & Crewcuts Greensboro

1615 Westover Terrace 336.543.6787

info@megansmith-photography.com

Check out our website for a full list of services!

pigtailsandcrewcuts.com

Winston-Salem 205 S. Stratford Rd. 336.997.8981

Bridal Hair & Makeup | Hair Extensions | Microblading Blonding & Balayage | Waxing | Teeth Whitening Lash Lifts, Tints & Extensions

Mae’s Makeover

Dew You Boutique

www.dewyouboutique.com @dewyouboutique

Megan Smith Photography megansmith-photography.com

(336) 934-3613 | maesmakeoversbeautybar.com 121 Pineview Drive | Kernersville, NC

Wood & Thread woodandthreadboutique.com

301 Brookstown Avenue Suite #500 Winston-Salem, NC @woodandthreadboutique

Opal & Onyx opalandonyxhairco.com 431 W End Blvd Winston Salem NC @opalandonyxhairco

October 2022 | 43

A TRIAD DRIVER’S BREATH OF FRESH AIR

BY AMY HILL | PHOTOS BY JODIE BRIM CREATIVE

In the past, I dreaded getting my oil changed and put it off for as long as possible. I knew that as soon as I showed up to popular oil change specialty shops, I would be misled about the most cost effective oil my vehicle could scrape by with, and that I would be told there were various things like windshield wipers and air filters that unnecessarily needed to be replaced. There were only a few occasions in which my dad didn’t get a phone call from me verifying that what the technicians were telling me was accurate. Naturally, I became fed up with stepping into the salesman’s lion den each time my car needed fresh oil, and I began researching alternatives to the companies that I had been visiting in the past.

NO MORE UPSELLING OR FEES FOR THINGS YOU DON’T NEED

When a Google search led me to stumble upon Express Oil Change & Tire Engineers, the number of positive reviews seemed promising, so I took my vehicle for a quick oil change. Additionally, my tire pressure monitoring system sometimes sends me false alarms, and I wanted to make sure my tires had no leaks in them while I was there. I was greeted by friendly, enthusiastic technicians and was quickly attended to. There was no attempt at upselling oil, and it was only a short amount of time later that an employee informed me that the only issue with my tires was a dying sensor battery. For once, I didn’t have to call my dad. I was quite stunned at the transparency of the Express Oil Change & Tire Engineers team, who hadn’t even tried to convince me that my air filter was filthy. I paid one of the lowest prices I had ever paid for a quality oil change, and was on my way home shortly after.

LOCAL BUSINESSES GIVE RAVE REVIEWS

Although it may sound like beginner’s luck to other skeptics like myself, I quickly learned that my experience with the integrity and honesty among the Express Oil team was not an isolated incident. A local business called Here ‘2 There Transportation, co-owned by Wanda Morrison and Glenda Shepard, had a similar experience with Express Oil that turned them into lifelong Express Oil enthusiasts. The business of Here ‘2 There Transportation is to provide nonemergency medical transportation, social and recreational transportation, daily and long distance travel to passengers in need. Their vans see 200 to 300 miles per day and need frequent upkeep and maintenance to stay up to par for transporting passengers to dialysis treatments and more.

When Express Oil Change & Tire Engineers accidentally misquoted a price for tires, the technicians realized their mistake and gave the Here ‘2 There Transportation team a higher quality set of tires for the lower price they were initially and mistakenly quoted. To Wanda and Glenda, the honesty of Express Oil owners Rebecca and Gary Howorka showed that they ran a business based on reputable values and integrity.

According to Wanda, Express Oil is Here ‘2 There’s go-to shop for any services their vans need. “We greatly appreciate that Gary and Rebecca respect what our organization does, and that they understand that we are in the same boat together,” explains Wanda. “We couldn’t operate without Express Oil and don’t know any other companies that would treat us so well. Anyone who has a mechanical need and wants it serviced in a timely manner is in good hands at Express Oil Change & Tire Engineers.”

WINSTON-SALEM 336.727-3681

3499 Robinhood Rd. Winston-Salem, NC 27105 (across the street from YMCA)

A VALUED TEAM AND CONVENIENT LOCATIONS

One reason Express Oil technicians and staff so easily uphold company values is because they feel valued and appreciated by owners Gary and Rebecca, who place a strong emphasis on investing in their team. Express Oil’s senior team members consistently impress customers with their expertise and professionalism.

Gary and Rebecca opened Express Oil Change & Tire Engineers after moving to Winston-Salem 14 years ago. They have now grown their business into three locations throughout the greater Winston-Salem area. After eminent domain closed their Hanes Mill location in September, Gary and Rebecca plan to open a new Hanes Mill location in early 2023. In the meantime, the pair encourages customers to visit their locations in Clemmons and on Robinhood Road.

As for me, I’ll continue visiting Express Oil Change & Tire Engineers with pleasure, as I no longer have to dread oil changes and state inspections. If you need a fresh set of tires, a state inspection, or one of the speediest oil changes in town, visit Express Oil Change & Tire Engineers Monday through Saturday at one of the two current locations below, and keep your eyes peeled for the reopening of a brand new Hanes Mill location next year. Visit www.expressoil. com to schedule an appointment and learn more about the services provided.

CLEMMONS 336.283.9552

2750 Lewisville-Clemmons Rd. Clemmons, NC 27012 (next to CVS)

Hanes Mill location in process of rebuilding

Second Harvest Food Bank

• Don’t beat yourself up. You don’t have a magic wand to make everything perfect. Accept your limitations and focus on the difference you can and do make in your loved one’s life.

Managing

Caregiver Stress

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

DID YOU KNOW THAT: • there are 53 million family caregivers in the US? • 61% of caregivers are women?

• adults ages 45 to 64 are the most likely to be caregivers?

A caregiver is “a family member or paid helper who regularly looks after a child or a sick, elderly, or disabled person.”

If you are a caregiver, you are probably familiar with caregiver stress. The Pew Research Center has found that while the majority of caregivers find their role rewarding, at least a third also indicate that caregiver stress is a struggle.

THE SIGNS OF CAREGIVER STRESS Caregiver stress can take many forms.

The Mayo Clinic cites these key signs to look out for: • feeling overwhelmed or constantly worried • feeling tired often • getting too much sleep or not enough sleep • gaining or losing weight • becoming easily irritated or angry • having frequent headaches, bodily pain, or other physical problems • abusing alcohol or drugs, including prescription medications

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Recent research from the Cleveland Clinic, Johns Hopkins Medicine suggests that beyond the time and emotional energy that caregiving requires, caregivers stress out because they: • struggle with balancing their own needs with those of their loved one • may lack the control over resources or the skills to deal with their loved one’s needs • experience a lack of privacy or “alone time” • have unreasonable expectations about the impact they can have • face the unreasonable expectations of other family members

A LOOK AHEAD From 2015 to 2020, there was a 9.5 million increase in the number of family caregivers in the United States. The aging of the population, combined with other social, cultural, and economic factors indicate that the role of caregiving is projected to increase even more.

CARE FOR THE CAREGIVER Yes, we care for a loved one because it’s “the right thing to do.” But the vast majority of us provide this care because we find it deeply rewarding and know that it makes a positive difference in our loved one’s life. We also know that if the shoe were on the other foot, we’d hope that they would be there for us. Nonetheless, the stress can and does get to us. Here are several key steps you can take to manage that stress:

• Be realistic. Try not to take on more than you can reasonably handle and remember that “No” can be the best response when someone asks you to take on yet another responsibility.

• Enlist and accept help. Get clear about how others can help you.

Make a list and then enlist help. Ask a sibling, a close friend, maybe even a neighbor to lend a hand. When someone says, “Let me know what I can do to help,” put aside your misplaced pride and give them one specific thing they can do.

• Keep your personal network strong. At various times, my friends and I have taken on the role of caregiver for family members – even for an ex-spouse! Be sure to stay close to those who lift you up and provide you with a non-judgmental shoulder to lean on. Make a point of talking with them and seeing them in person as much as possible.

• Stay informed. Remember that knowledge is power. Learn enough about what ails your loved one so that you can proceed to care for them in an informed way.

Understanding also reinforces empathy, which can run thin when stress is high.

• Reach out for resources. Don’t assume that you know what our local community can offer. Look into services such as transportation, housekeeping, and meal delivery.

Ask other caregivers, as you may be surprised to learn that they have already done the legwork.

• Take care of yourself. You’ve heard it countless times before because it is true: if your well is dry, everything suffers – including the care you are able to provide. Everyone is different, but taking care of the basics – diet, sleep, exercise, screening exams – always matters.

Do it for you and for them!

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Family Activities for the Fall Season

BY ELISA WALLACE COPPEDE

The colors on the leaves have changed. There is a crispness to the morning air. Pumpkins have begun appearing on the front stoops of homes. Yes, the fall season is in full swing. Since this is my personal favorite time of year, any activity outside could be fun for me. However, I do realize that when it comes to activities that are family-friendly for my crew, not anything will do. If you are like me and would like to share your love of this time of year with other family members, be ready to put on your younger self shoes. Simple acts, like hunting for different colored leaves while on a walk, can bring out the child in all of us, as well as fascinate the younger minds in our homes. If you have older children at home, there are still different autumn geared activities to enjoy. Curious for easy, affordable, yet fun activities that will have all loving pumpkin spice as much as you do? Read on for five different family activities every member of your team will love.

FALL FAMILY ACTIVITY #1: Explore the outdoors, while noticing how it has changed.

An amazingly simple and free activity is to simply go for a walk with your loved ones. From here, the activities are endless.

From jumping into a pile of newly raked leaves, to picking up beautiful ones and talking about the assorted colors and textures of them, these outdoor acts will create long-lasting memories for your family members.

FALL FAMILY ACTIVITY #2: Create a collage of the different leaves you have picked up.

There are a variety of different art pieces you can create with your little or older ones using old leaves and acorns. From designing press-leaf art pieces, to using leaves to create stamps, there are countless different art masterpieces you can create. Check out the blog “Mother Natured” for great tips on how to make leaf art and crafts.

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FALL FAMILY ACTIVITY #3: Take a road trip to visit a haunted location.

While some locations may require a small fee, and some may not be friendly for the younger members, there are a number of exciting locations to check out near Winston-Salem this fall. These visits will absolutely get everyone excited for Halloween! Check out my other article, “Haunted Carolina Places to Visit,” in Forsyth Family this month for a full list of different spots to check out this spooky season.

FALL FAMILY ACTIVITY #4: Welcome autumn by baking!

It is the perfect time of year to make anything featuring a fall lover’s favorite flavor—pumpkin spice! Try out a new pumpkin bread recipe or make pumpkin banana pancakes for your family one morning. Not a pumpkin spice fanatic? There are other great fall recipes to enjoy. From apple crumble cinnamon rolls to sweet potato cobbler, there are many different sweet treats to create!

FALL FAMILY ACTIVITY #5: Enjoy fall crafts with the young, as well as young at heart.

From traditional Halloween crafts, like pumpkin carving, to creating turkey placemats to adorn your Thanksgiving dinner table, fall is a great season to create art together. There are numerous different autumn crafts to choose from, too. Many blogs online have a wide variety of activities to choose from. For example, if you have littles at home, you may want to incorporate an easier activity, like making a turkey placemat out of different pieces of construction paper, or toilet roll paper turkeys. If you have older children, you can create something more detailed, like creating and painting robot gourds. Regardless of the age, the entire family can enjoy these crafts.

Jodie Brim Photography

SHOWCASING THE STORY BEHIND THE BRAND

PHOTOGRAPHY VIDEOGRAPHY for business owners

jodiebrim.com | 336.997.9487 | @jodiebrim 405 N. Cherry Street, Winston-Salem

Jodie Brim, Photographer + Creative Director

Purpose Push: Mindshifting is scary - do it anyway

Sheridan C. Watkins is a journalist and the owner of Perennial Peaces (formerly Shairpins), a jewelry and gifts brand focused on transcending self-worth to all women. Her true work began after climbing out of a dark place with the help of God and therapy and her life mission is to provide tangible peace through her Divine gifts to help women heal and transform their life. Follow the mission on Instagram and Facebook: @shairpinsgarden

BY SHERIDAN WATKINS

“Who am I to think I can accomplish everything I set out to do?” This a common question entrepreneurs may ask themselves out loud, internally and subconsciously, while simultaneously pursuing their goals. One part of them believes they can do it because they’ve seen others do it, while the other part believes it’s too late for them. Can you relate? Your biggest role model can throw all the best tips at you to help reach your goals financially, mentally, and physically but if your mindset isn’t in a good place, you’ll never consistently implement any of the tips that can change your life.

Today, we are exercising a term called “mindshifting” and retraining the brain to believe you can accomplish the goals that may seem insurmountable.

Because you can!

What you need for peace of mind Mindshifting means to change your mindset and unlearn paralyzing habits and patterns for the betterment of your lifestyle. For mindshifting to be easier, you should first look at your environment and reflect on what is contributing to the stress, discouragement, or unfulfillment you may experience. Could it be the way your home is organized, what you watch and listen to, people you interact with, or constant distractions that leave the door open for road blocks on your success journey? Those things are extremely important to consider, and I won’t tell you what to do, but I will say you need to do something.

I’ve learned peace is a choice so you must put your best effort to surround yourself with nothing else. Of course, every day won’t be perfectly peaceful but when you are in the mindset of being purposeful with your days instead of going with the flow, you take on a proactive approach to life instead of reactive.

You’ll begin to see how your boundaries are respected, you inspire others to seek peace for themselves, and you get more things done!

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How to retrain the brain This will likely be the hardest yet most liberating thing you ever accomplish, but do you believe in yourself? (The answer is “yes”-even if you’re thinking “no.”)

Even when you don’t believe you can achieve a goal, pretend you can and write affirmations to yourself so your brain is used to ingesting a new reality. However, it shouldn’t stop there because that’s simply a tactic. What we often miss is pairing it up with our faith, health, and purpose. It’s the linchpin that keeps you from giving up. As you work on retraining your thought patterns, you will meet resistance that can come up in a number of ways.

Your brain is like a muscle, and muscles get sore when they workout in a different way.

Mentally, it can look like discouragement. That

soreness (in this analogy, discouragement) won’t subside unless you keep working out! Mental workouts can include reading your Bible, meditating consistently, praying constantly, going to therapy, and taking breaks.

One of the scariest parts about mindshifting is wondering, what if you make this drastic change only to be completely wrong? Well, I challenge you to realize something is already wrong otherwise you wouldn’t be seeking solutions or reading articles like this. So would you rather be knowingly wrong for part of your life or all of it? Choosing the latter is the easy road and requires you to do nothing more than what you’re doing right now. And if you do what you’ve always done, you will get what you’ve always got. Choose something different. It’s scary, but do it anyway. I have faith in you.

iHeart Radio

PHOTOS BY MEGAN BLACK

GNO - ROAR

The Joy of Spontaneity

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

While I like to think that I’ve made a lot of hard-won progress in terms of spontaneity, my heart sank in recognition when what I read in Psychology Today sounded a lot like me: “Even small decisions are as weighty as those of the Supreme Court; everyday life is heavily routinized and breaking out in even small ways can require a lot of planning. Maybe it’s time to loosen up.”

Well, not as weighty as the Supreme Court, but still….

First, I learned that my rational, overly cautious, anxiousleaning mind was getting in my way of “loosening up.” That rang true. But hope springs eternal because it turns out that even my malleable, pliable, learning brain could improve by “shifting my source of internal info,” taking action and taking risks. My planful way of moving through my world and through my life is a source of calm – something I control and count on. But I also know that it works against me when my gut is telling me to change it up, to do something else.

Bingo. The first step in the road to enhanced spontaneity is listening to your gut, more specifically, to “the wants and not-wants, the like and not like.” When my gut asks me to pay attention to something that’s not part of the plan, I become uneasy, confused. Sticking to the auto-pilot plan is easier, safer, but listening to my gut could be the key to unlocking my spontaneity superpower. I might as well aim high, right?

The next bit of wisdom I discovered was to take it slow and make it small. I don’t need to pack a bag, book a flight and show up on my friend’s doorstep in the wild abandon of spontaneity.

Instead, I could call her out of blue if connection is what my gut is telling me I want and need. The idea is to pause to consider what I’m feeling, and not push it down because it’s not in the plan or on the schedule. Instead of always tracing the same route on my morning walk, I could follow the urge to step out in the opposite direction. If this counts as spontaneity, then yes, there is hope for me. I understand it will feel weird at first, but that doing so is actually strengthening circuits in my brain. That’s cool!

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It’s what the experts say will lay the foundation for making bigger moves, maybe a whole day where I follow my gut. I think the only place I have that down to an art is shopping, but that’s another story. This is about shaking up my comfort zone and getting comfortable with doing so.

Here’s a wrap on my spontaneity lessons: • Trust my gut – pause, listen, identify the message • Step out of my comfort zone – take the unplanned action; build from there • Create the space for spontaneity – give myself permission to be “planless”

Sharpen the Saw, Hone the Skill It’s like anything else: changing a habit takes commitment and practice. Here are some ways to get started: • Eat something very different for breakfast • Watch a program you’ve never seen before • Drive a different route to the grocery store • Say “yes” to an Invite you’ve declined in the past • Go out and buy something you WANT but don’t NEED • Sign up for a class, something different and fun • Start a conversation with someone • Give yourself a “Free” day where you follow wherever your gut leads you • Try a new drink at your coffee shop (same goes for wine or a craft beer!)

• Make a small change in your appearance: a new lip color, a slightly different haircut, a bolder pair of earrings And if you’re partnered up, ask your significant other to join you on a day of spontaneity. Instead of asking “What do I feel like doing today?” suggest: “Why don’t we try doing something different today?”

Spontaneity can feel scary for some of us, but I am not letting that stop me. How about you?

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BY ERIKA TAYLOR, FOUNDER OF TAYLOR YOUR CLOSET & TAYLORINGSTYLE BLOG | @TAYLORINGSTYLE

The fall season is officially upon us and I personally could not be more excited! This month we’re kicking off the season at Fraleigh’s Boutique. Donna (owner) dreamt of owning her own boutique since she was a child and in 1981, she and her mom made that dream their reality. Special from the start, Fraleigh’s Boutique was named after owner Donna’s middle name (Leigh) and her Mom’s middle name (Francis). Fraleigh’s is a pillar in the Forsyth community and epitomizes the American Dream and females as entrepreneurs.

So what do they have at Fraleigh’s? Everyday fashion with a little flare, accessories, shoes, and formal wear - they pretty much have something for every woman.

I am big on versatility and I love when that is offered not only in an outfit, but in a place where I’m buying my outfits. They also have clothes that are appropriate for teachers/a classroom setting (which I definitely appreciate) and really, outfits for multiple places of work.

This next look is a great one for the workplace, church, or a girls’ mountain trip. This sweater is lightweight, yet warm, and is perfect to wear with jeans or leggings. We paired it with booties, but you could also do a pair of flats, mules or even tall boots. You can do a similar color bootie, black, or even a pop of leopard for your shoe with this look. Remember, leopard prints are our friends, don’t be scared to add a little in with your accessories.

For our first look, we have this beautiful light blue and white shacket. It is great quality and perfect for layering all season long. You can style this shacket similar to how we did with denim or even with a pair of leggings.

These jeans (and the others I tried on) are so comfortable and they carry a wide variety of sizes.

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Y’all. This. Dress. I wish I had somewhere to wear it! It is gorgeous and I love it. This and the jumpsuit above are just two examples of the beautiful formal pieces they have at Fraleigh’s. They are your onestop-shop for events and to me, that convenience is huge and hard to find.

They even do in-house alterations! I’m telling y’all, these ladies at Fraleigh’s are so sweet and on it when it comes to helping their customers.

We really love a good jumpsuit! They can still be appropriate for formal events or weddings, especially when they are this beautiful! This one would be perfect to wear as a wedding guest and is a great choice almost all-year round. The quality is great and the look is stunning!

This next look is definitely one for the teachers. I love this muted leopard sweater. It is warm, soft, and easy to style. It goes great with light or dark denim and/or black pants. A taupe, cream, or tan is going to be your go-to color for your shoe with this look.Throw this on with a jacket and you are warm and good to go, girl!

Let’s talk a little more about Fraleigh’s formal wear. The ladies have it going on! No matter what role you’re playing in an upcoming wedding bridesmaid, Mother of the Bride, grandmother, etc. they have you covered from head to toe. In addition to their gorgeous selection, you’ll find shoes, purses, and jewelry for your special occasion.

Now that you’re in the mood for shopping, you can visit Fraleigh’s Boutique in person, but you can also shop their website and social media. Their social media is where you can go to shop all of their new arrivals right there in the comments! Bottom line, when it comes to your fall wardrobe, don’t sleep on Fraleigh’s Boutique.

Casual, formal, or workwear, they will help you find something to leave you feeling confident and excited about what you’re wearing!

Happy Shopping!

XO, Erika Taylor Erika Taylor is the creator of Tayloringstyle Blog & founder of Taylor Your Closet, her personal styling business.

Her love for style, writing, and helping others came together to produce a business that makes day-to-day styling attainable for women from all walks of life. She tailors her clients' wardrobes so that they can save time putting outfits together, feel confident in what they wear, and conquer whatever the day brings.

Maintaining Your Christian Values in the Workplace

BY LESLIE SPEAS

If you have spent any time in the workplace, you know that it can be a struggle to maintain your Christian values. The workplace is a hotbed of different beliefs, different personalities, different attitudes, and different work styles. There are people with a wide range of aspects of diversity, including religion. In the midst of all this, Christians are called to display values and behavior that show the love of Christ. This can be very difficult at times when you are dealing with politicking, backstabbing, gossiping, lack of integrity, and poor work ethic.

HUMILITY C.S. Lewis says that “Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less.” Humble people listen more and talk less.

They put others’ needs before their own; admit mistakes; show appreciation, and minimize status differences. 1 Peter 5:5 says, “Clothe yourselves with humility towards one another because God opposes the proud and gives grace to the humble.”

STRONG WORK ETHIC

Let’s briefly explore five of these values:

A strong work ethic is exemplified by demonstrating a good attitude; being dependable; managing work time wisely; performing well consistently, and showing loyalty to your organization. Individuals with a strong work ethic also work well with others – and they show integrity and respect. Ephesians 6:7-8 says, “Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men, because you know that the Lord will reward everyone for whatever good he does, whether he is slave or free.”

INTEGRITY

COMPASSION

So, what exactly are values? Your values are the things that you believe are important in the way you live and work. They determine your priorities, and, deep down, they’re probably the measures you use to tell if your life is turning out the way you want it to. We all have our own individual values but I believe that some values should be common for Christians to demonstrate in the workplace.

Integrity connotes a deep commitment to doing the right thing for the right reason, regardless of the circumstances, even when no one is watching. Integrity includes a sense of honesty, dependability, and consistency of character. People with integrity adhere to company policies. They own up to their mistakes. They are honest and don’t tell untruths. They are trustworthy and dependable. Proverbs 10:9 says, “Whoever walks in integrity walks securely, but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out.”

RESPECT A study by Harvard Business Review found that respect was the number one thing that people wanted at work. We show respect to others by treating them with courtesy and kindness; encouraging them to share opinions and ideas; really listening to them; treating them fairly, and being inclusive. So, why do we need to respect others? Remember the golden rule, “Do to others as you would have them do to you (Luke 6:31).”

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There are so many needs and struggles where we can show compassion and be an encouragement to others around us. As Christians, we are called to show compassion to others in all aspects of our lives. Jesus had an extremely busy, three-year work schedule but he still made lots of time to show kindness and compassion to others. He taught us not to walk away from those who are facing difficult situations in life but to be a companion that walks with those who are suffering. We can do this by noticing when colleagues are in pain or are undergoing personal stress and trying to make them feel secure and comfortable at work.Colossians 3:12 says, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.”

In summary, living our Christian values is the best way to stay true to yourself and show others that you’re a person of faith in the workplace. We are called to be the salt and the light of the world (Matthew 5:13-16) and that includes the workplace!

Roar

The Real Deal with Candice Deal

OH, SUGAR SUGAR!

BY CANDICE DEAL

Holidays are just ahead. Halloween, Thanksgiving and all the holidays of December and New Year’s. Holidays are exciting and full of family and friends. However, for those on diets, holidays can be stressful because holiday treats are often filled with sugar. Sugar, as we know, is not great for our health. It is inflammatory, addictive, and oh, so sweet! And if you’re someone trying to lose weight, sugar can derail a diet in a bite, if that bite turns into eating the whole cake!

There are a lot of great options to help kick sugar to the curb and some easy swaps that make all the baking and delights just as tasty without the brain inflammation.

Sugar, in addition to the aforementioned negatives, also kicks our insulin and glucose levels into high gear. When this happens, it can also stimulate cell growth, and not happy cell growth, but cellular growth of the mutated cells, the cells we want to get rid of, not multiply.

If you are a tea or coffee drinker, try swapping sugar for cinnamon.

Cinnamon can cut the bitterness like sugar does. It can make your morning coffee taste like fall all year long and the smell of it with each sip makes for a happier morning! In testing, cinnamon has been shown to reduce blood sugar levels, lower triglycerides, and help those that suffer from diabetes bring down their blood glucose levels. It’s also a great addition to baked items or even morning oats.

Adding it to fresh baked breads gives your baked goods a whole different taste and it’s a perfect pairing for fall and holiday baked items. Some tips suggest combining a shot glass of oil and a dash of cinnamon to thwart any blood sugar spikes after eating.

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Commercial sweeteners – there are a plethora.

Stick to the ones from nature!

Monk fruit is a fantastic option for a natural sweetener. I find that this one is easier to compare to sugar when it’s a 1:1 measurement for adding to any food or drink and it’s packed with healthy positives. Monk fruit is native to southern China. It’s in the perennial family of gourds and the sweet part is the fruit extract called mogrosides. Monk fruit doesn’t contain calories or carbohydrates like sugar cane. It has been used to cure ailments long before it became popular in the U.S. The mogrosides are a powerhouse of antioxidants, even immunity boosting Vitamin C. Its antiinflammatory properties will help thwart arthritis, digestive issues and even cancer.

Studies have shown that monk fruit can inhibit the growth of cancer cells by lowering the DNA damage from free radicals. It can be added to warm drinks to soothe a sore throat during cold, flu and allergy season. It’s even been shown to have a natural histamine effect, blocking allergens. It’s anti-fibrotic, meaning it can fight inflammation and scar tissue in the lungs. On top of those, it’s antimicrobial, meaning it can help create a healthy environment in the gut.

Unlike artificial sweeteners that can wreak havoc on the gut as they can add to any pathogenic bacteria lurking in the gut. Monk fruit is a much better option than refined sugar. Sugar simply doesn’t pack all these amazing benefits!

Stevia is another great option. In liquid form you can cut out the other additives. The trick to Stevia is to use less than you think. It’s actually sweeter than sugar, sometimes fifty times the sweetness! Once you have too much, it can be bitter instead of the natural sweetness people have come to love it for. Liquid can be tricky for baking; you want a granular form. So just read those labels and make sure there aren’t sneaky chemicals.

When going to any gathering, consider bringing a dessert! Even if you must make an extra dish, it can reduce the sweet tooth guilt that comes after that slice of cake or pie, knowing it’s packed with sugar or even worse, high fructose corn syrup! This way, you can control exactly what’s in the dessert and you can feel confident when adding that treat to your plate and knowing that it is a better, healthier option and you can feel good about sharing it with family and friends.

A brand that’s super easy and makes a fantastic cake, cupcake, or dessert is Fit Bake. They have fun, fantastic recipes and batters that are super easy, sugar free and contain simple, natural ingredients. These are a staple for any birthday or holiday treat I want to make for a party. They are also gluten free, which makes them friendly for even more of the party!

When it comes to holidays, or every day, there is a better way to enjoy the sweetness of life!

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October 2022 | 61

BY AMY HILL

Clemmons consignment shop Carolina Vintiques dazzles customers with its charming interior, welcoming staff, and neverending influx of distinctive modern and vintage home furnishings and decor. Home to a combination of imported retail items and antiques, every corner of the shop is sure to catch your eye.

On Saturday, December 1st, Carolina Vintiques will be celebrating its second anniversary at its Clemmons location at 2550 Lewisville Clemmons Road. Visit the shop between 10:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m. to celebrate with the vendors, enter raffles and drawings for your chance to win giveaway prizes, and snack on refreshments as you browse the store floor.

Seven full-time vendors, including shop owner Shelle, share floor space in Carolina Vintiques, which generates a constant flow of new, unique inventory for customers. Each vendor renting space in the store display their products with an individual flair.

Although the store is a blend of various vendors with individual styles, the inventory at Carolina Vintiques blends beautifully together without seeming cluttered or overwhelming, a challenge that many antique shops struggle with.

Before you rely on major retailers or online shopping to find the perfect gifts for friends, family, and co-workers, Carolina Vintiques is the ideal spot to snag one-of-a-kind items for any special occasion. What sets Carolina Vintiques apart from other antique and consignment shops in the Triad is its selection of top-notch curated products for sale, but also its perfect balance between modern home goods and products with a vintage vibe.

Upon entering the store, customers are pleasantly welcomed

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with a vast selection of hand poured candles, including dough bowl candles and diffusers, home décor, and striking accent pieces that are nearly impossible to find anywhere else in the Triad.

Carolina Vintiques also performs custom work on all types of furniture for customers. Text a picture of the piece you’d like painted for a price quote. Pick the perfect color from the wide variety of mineral paint colors sold in-store. Custom pieces only take a few days from start to finish, so you’ll have your favorite piece back in no time. Shelle and her team also provide in-person and virtual consulting services to customers who need assistance in restructuring rooms in their homes and creating vignettes to create an aesthetically pleasing living space.

Those interested in trying their own hand at furniture painting will delight in the ease of the Fusion furniture paint sold at Carolina Vintiques. All in one, primer, paint, and topcoat, makes the painting process enjoyable for DIY enthusiasts. View Fusion’s website for painting tutorials at www.fusionmineralpaint.com.

If you have retail experience and an enthusiastic attitude, a sales associate position at Carolina Vintiques might be the perfect gig for you. Stop by the store in-person to introduce yourself and learn more about flexible job opportunities.

Ready to start shopping? Visit the store in Clemmons, but also stay posted on the latest news and updates from Carolina Vintiques on Facebook and Instagram. For custom orders and other inquiries, call (336) 829-1173 or email carolinavintiques@gmail.com.

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October 2022 | 63

IT’S OK TO BE “INDOORSY” Great pastimes for those who prefer the indoor life.

BY KAREN COOPER

I admit it. I’m not much of an outdoor person. Regardless of the season, I simply prefer indoor pursuits. I’m sure there are others out there like me, although they can be hard to find. It’s much more popular to be “outdoorsy.” Case in point…my children are athletic and enjoy all kinds of outdoor activities.

My husband has hiked sections of the Appalachian Trail several times, he is scuba certified and loves to camp and fish. I am definitely the odd (wo)man out among these adventurous men! Of course, I understand that staying active and engaged is important and there are many activities my family likes to do together. Still, I stand by my preference for indoor pastimes. In fact, there are times when I love being left to enjoy these activities…even if I’m doing them alone…especially if I’m doing them alone! These activities feed your mind, body, and spirit. Here are some of my favorites…

MUSEUMS AND OTHER HISTORICAL SITES If you’re a history buff like me, visiting museums and historical sites is a great way to learn something new or study an area you’re interested in. It’s also a great excuse to travel. I like to identify museums or historical sites that are interesting to me and plan either a day trip or a longer trip to visit these locations. It’s like taking a trip back in time. You can lose yourself in a museum devoted to whatever subject interests you. If you choose to travel, you may also want to make reservations at a restaurant you’d like to try and treat yourself to a delicious meal as part of your adventure.

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TAI CHI

BOOK CLUBS Sometimes I let books pile up and then get so overwhelmed by the pile I don’t read anything. Being involved in a book club not only allows you to interact with like-minded people who also enjoy the same hobby, but it basically forces you to get going on the book that’s being discussed (unless you want to come to the meeting unprepared). If you’ve ever been to a book club, you know there is true joy in discussing your thoughts about a book you really like and hearing others’ opinions on what they think of the characters and storylines. This is one indoor pursuit I have loved for years and look to when I am needing a shot of camaraderie and a reason to dive into a great read.

COOKING AND BAKING Cooking is a great creative outlet and has positive mental health benefits. Cooking and baking can be calming, stimulate the senses, make those around you happy and as a big bonus…can offer delicious rewards.

WATCHING MOVIES Whether it’s an old favorite or new film, people of all ages and activity levels enjoy getting comfortable and watching a great movie.

Laughing through comedies, and even crying through a good drama can have health benefits.

Multiple studies have found that laughter not only enhances your mood but can also improve your immune system and decrease stress hormones. Crying can increase the production of endorphins. Re-watching favorite movies can provide comfort and evoke nostalgia, which can improve connection to family and friends. You can also make movie-watching a social event by inviting friends and serving yummy snacks!

Tai Chi is considered an art that embraces the mind, body, and spirit through light exercise, stretching, and meditation. It improves balance and flexibility and contributes to an overall improvement in fitness. Many studies have shown that practicing Tai Chi can reduce the risk of falls for older adults by as much as 45 percent. There are many beginner classes online for anyone who would like to learn about this ancient Chinese exercise technique.

VOLUNTEERING Preferring to be indoors doesn’t mean you’re avoiding hard work. One indoor activity that may appeal to those who would rather be indoors is volunteering. There are many ways to volunteer, including serving in a soup kitchen, helping children with homework after school, tutoring adults in reading or computer skills, sorting clothing or toys at a shelter, among many others. Seek out organizations and opportunities that interest you.

BOARD GAMES, CARDS, AND PUZZLES A fun and effective way to enhance your thinking and decision-making skills is to play board games or complete puzzles. These activities require us to use essential cognitive skills, help maintain brain function and support the problem-solving and memory components of the brain.

Remember to clearly define for yourself those things that YOU like to do and make space for them in your life! As women, we often end up going along with what others want to do because we love to make the people we love happy! Practice self care and put some focused energy on making sure you’re keeping yourself happy, too….whether that means staying indoors, outdoors or a little bit of both.

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October 2022 | 65

Simply Slow Down & Savor the Chocolate!

BY MARTIE EMORY | PHOTOS BY JODIE BRIM CREATIVE

It’s no secret that visiting Black Mountain Chocolate Bar in Winston-Salem is a bit like coming home. Filled with the fragrance of the world’s favorite treat, there’s also a warm sense of hospitality that truly comes from its “Black Mountain” roots.

Just as you’d find in the original Black Mountain (a rustic destination nestled in the NC mountains), an afternoon at the chocolate bar here in the Innovation Quarter might mean the pace moves a little slower, and patrons know how to make the most of an afternoon or evening. After all, isn’t savoring chocolate the ultimate indulgence?

Owners Brent and Millie Peters think so, and they proudly welcome you to their location in Bailey South. With expanded gathering and seating space, and popular nighttime hours to end your day on a sweet note, and maybe even some chocolate-inspired spirits, their journey to now has been heavily about family and fate. Brent worked in a chocolate shop while in college, always nurturing an interest in how the flavorful treat was made. When he purchased BMC in 2013, while it was still located in the mountains, he spent a year filled with long weekends learning the chocolate business along with his daughter, Megan, a recent culinary school graduate. Brent put the finishing touches on a personal dream, left the corporate world for something more creative, and turned an atypical mid-life venture into a much-loved, successful local business.

When he moved BMC to its Trade Street location, the chocolate flowed but foot traffic was slow, and Brent’s devoted wife, Millie, challenged her husband to really think big! The recent expansion to Innovation Quarter syncs perfectly with the area’s energy and neighborhood vibe.

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The newest version of Black Mountain Chocolate Bar may be centered around taste, but the entire BMC experience is much broader. “We’ve designed it to be about spending quality time with friends, and simply enjoying yourself,” says Brent. Think of it as more of a “hospitality bar” really – with an endless menu of chocolates, desserts, and decadent beverages.

Still the original North Carolina bean-to-bar chocolate, Black Mountain Chocolate comes to you fresh from the local workshop. “We work in small batches to coax the maximum flavor from each and every cocoa bean,” explains Brent. And with a dedicated staff that has also learned the finer points of chocolate-making, every day is a delicious opportunity to spread some joy and some sweetness, and to watch employees grow in their careers, as well as their love for chocolate! Lucky Black Mountain Chocolate staff members shared their favorite things with Forsyth Woman!

Tirra C.: My favorite thing about working at BMC is growth, and this job has allowed me to grow both personally and professionally in many ways. My favorite part? It’s 100% the smells – all of them. Every room in our beautiful space has a different smell and it primes all your other senses.

My ultimate choice? A chocolate batch before the conche, raw cocoa beans, cinnamon chips, and eclair shells fresh from the oven.

Elise P.: This is simply a great place to work, and I know it’s all because of the staff we have built over the years. The flavor of our chocolate alone is what sets us apart from anyone else in the industry, and I love being able to use it to create wonderful desserts for our customers.

Katelyn W.: Everyone at BMC is super-supportive and friendly. I work in my chosen career field, and do what I enjoy on a daily basis. My favorite thing is our house-made marshmallows! Both regular vanilla or flavored, they are fluffy and delicious, not to mention fun to make.

Katie R.: The BMC team is like no other I’ve ever worked with. They are compassionate, hard working people. My favorite treat? The salted caramel tart. It’s the perfect balance of flavors and textures.

Anna R.: Everyone here is so talented in so many ways, and we love to see each other succeed. I love our Mocha because our house-made chocolate sauce really elevates the flavor profile of the drink.

Joanna H.: I have learned valuable skills and techniques in baking, although I wouldn’t be anywhere without my amazing co-workers! My go-to treat is the peanut butter cookie because it’s packed to the brim with peanut butter, and has the perfect crunch/softness ratio.

Rae C.: Since day one at BMC, my coworkers have been supportive, kind, and always willing to help me succeed. My favorite treat is the s’mores tart because of the texture – it’s like a little chocolate chess pie, and it’s also very beautiful!

Nate W.: BMC has been one of my favorite quiet study spots for getting classwork done, and I now enjoy working here for our friendly crew of staff, who make the store a lively place! My go-to treat is always the extremely fudgy chocolate torte, as it never fails to satisfy a sweet tooth.

Owner Brent P.: I love watching this team create inviting hospitality for our guests. And I prefer to watch while enjoying our Nib’s Old Fashioned, a soothing blend of bourbon, agave, and chocolate bitters.

Owner Millie P.: I love our team at BMC. They have made my husband’s dream a reality, and I’m fortunate to be a part of it. I’m so proud of them every time I come in our doors.

And my favorite treat? The Malted Millie truffle, of course!

Make time soon to visit with friends, or schedule a meeting in this supremely comfortable setting! Black Mountain Chocolate Bar is located at 450 N. Patterson Avenue, Suite 110, Winston-Salem. Call them at 336-293-4698, or visit blackmountainchocolate.com, where you can order online for pick-up and delivery. Hours are Tuesday through Wednesday noon – 6 p.m., Thursday noon – 8 p.m., Friday and Saturday 10 a.m. - 11 p.m., Sunday noon – 6 p.m., closed on Monday. Bar hours are 2 p.m. - 8 p.m. Thursday, 2 p.m. 11 p.m. Friday and Saturday, and noon – 6 p.m. on Sunday.

October 2022 | 69

Cheers!

THE LIFE-SAVING EXPERTS YOU NEED Next-level care from Amanda Cooksey, PA

BY MARTIE EMORY

With incredible, life-long support from a family who has always been a part of the medical field, Amanda Cooksey, PA, has arrived in a competitive profession with all the talent and drive needed to achieve her own dreams.

In her first year as a PA with Novant Health Vein Specialists, Cooksey has felt blessed to become a permanent part of the Winston-Salem community, has found a church family, and is choosing to make this her home while treating patients of Novant Health Vein Specialists.

Originally from Charlotte, and still very close to her parents and brother there, Cooksey has felt empowered with her choice to begin her career in the Triad.

She completed her undergrad studies at UNC Chapel Hill, and PA school at Wake Forest University. Being a PA was a natural choice, given her peopleoriented personality, and an option her aunt – an ob-gyn – suggested, knowing

Cooksey would enjoy the patient interaction. During clinical rotations in PA school, she spent time in the operating room, clinic, and in the field – enjoying that every day was different and that care could be both broad and specialized, all at once.

Since joining Novant Health Vein Specialists, Cooksey has been continually impressed with the talents and experience of all the providers, and particularly inspired by Ashley Rickey, MD. Observing how Dr. Rickey balances work life with raising a family is also empowering, and such a positive role model for women entering the field.

“Society can put women in one mold or another,” said Cooksey, who looks forward to having a family herself one day. “It’s inspiring to see you don’t always have to choose.”

Cooksey also admires Novant Health’s focus on community medicine.

“Even outside the vascular group, all the Novant Health providers are very supportive, and I find other groups within the system to be very approachable,” said Cooksey. “They are all so respectful and let me have a voice.

Our work is very peer-to-peer oriented.”

For someone considering the PA field, especially a female, Cooksey encourages always pursuing your goals.

“Create your own opportunities,” she said. “Shadow a PA and continue to network outside your comfort zone.

Always maintain your humility, but certainly be confident in your skills.”

In other words, go for it! Like Cooksey did when she was asked to be involved in Forsyth Woman magazine’s inaugural Women on the Move Conference in March of 2022, to speak on behalf of Novant Health Vein Specialists, a Platinum Sponsor of the event. It was the perfect local platform to talk about her role as a PA, the importance of taking care of your health, and the strong values Novant Health providers share within the community. All those messages reinforce the life goal of truly believing in yourself, and seeing how far your dreams can take you!

Novant Health Vein Specialists has 10 experienced vascular providers you can trust to meet your needs, both in-person and virtually.

The care team uses the latest technology to provide advanced, individualized programs and treatments, and the clinic also offers free monthly screenings at the Winston-Salem location. The remaining 2022 dates are Oct. 4 and 20; Nov. 1 and 17; and Dec. 1 and 6. There’s always a chance you’ll get to meet Amanda at your screening!

For more information or to schedule an appointment, visit SalemVeins.com or call 336276-0776.

Trellis

Novant Skin & Vein

October 2022 | 73

Have you heard about the Dolly Parton Imagination Library and its impact in Forsyth County? Over 13,000 kids in Forsyth County receive its FREE books every month in the mail! That is 60% of the kids that are eligible for this program!

Each month, the Dolly Parton Imagination Library (DPIL) provides an age-appropriate book (in Spanish or English) for each registered child in Forsyth County, absolutely free to the family. This program is locally managed by Smart Start of Forsyth County (SSFC).

SSFC provides an equitable early childhood system that fosters an environment for learning, growing, developing, and succeeding.

Education begins at birth. As soon as a baby takes their first breath, they begin to gather and retain information about the world around them. Smart Start of Forsyth County exists to strengthen a child’s natural desire to learn. Smart Start is a nationally recognized program that assists families by preparing their young children (from birth through age five) for success in school and life. SSFC is also responsible for providing free resources to Early Childhood Educators across Forsyth County. DPIL is one of many of the resources that SSFC has to offer our community.

SSFC’s Chief Strategy Officer Garet Beane said, “Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library provides an efficient and effective strategy to promote literacy and a love of reading in Forsyth County.

We are thrilled to offer these books in English and Spanish to all children from age birth to 5 years old. It is a great way for children to receive a special book in the mail addressed to them. It also gives them a wonderful

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opportunity to put their screens away and read their own books! We are thrilled to offer this valuable program to parents and children in our community in partnership with DPIL and the NC State Legislature.”

Improving early childhood literacy with Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library creates opportunities for children to thrive and succeed in school, helping their communities grow and prosper. Research indicates every $1 a community invests in early childhood education yields a 13% return on investment per child annually through better education, economic, health, and social outcomes. To register a child for this free program, please visit www.

SmartStart-FC.org

ABOUT DOLLY PARTON’S IMAGINATION LIBRARY Since launching in 1995, Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library has become the preeminent early childhood book gifting program in the world. The flagship program of The Dollywood Foundation has gifted well over 150 million free books in Australia, Canada, The Republic of Ireland, the United Kingdom, and the United States. The Imagination Library mails more than 1.8 million high-quality, age-appropriate books each month to registered children from birth to age five. Dolly envisioned creating a lifelong love of reading, inspiring them to dream. The program’s impact has been widely researched, and results suggest positive increases in key early childhood literacy metrics. Penguin Random House is the exclusive publisher for Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library. For more information, please visit imaginationlibrary.com.

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October 2022 | 75

DIY Girls Night:

How to Host a Wreath Making Party

BY TARYN JEREZ

Pumpkin spice lattes are in the air which means you just might be getting that familiar fall itch to get a little crafty! Kick off the season by gathering your girlfriends together and host a wreath making party this month!

Wreaths are the perfect DIY project for a group because you can share supplies, keep things cost effective and create your project sitting down just about anywhere! Here’s everything you need to host the perfect fall girls’ night of wreath making memories!

PLAN THE DETAILS IN ADVANCE

Once you select a date and time, get a headcount for who’s joining the fun so you can gather all of your supplies. You’ll want to head to your local craft supply store to pick up the things you want to provide for everyone and ask your guests to bring whatever supplies they want to contribute as well. You can even send them a “suggested supply” list to help!

• Wreath base (foam, metal, grapevine, etc.)

• Faux flowers and leaves • Decorative add-ons (ribbon, twigs, wood letters etc.)

• Glue guns and glue sticks • Scissors and wire cutters • Power strip (optional) You can choose one kind of base for your wreath projects, such as a grapevine wreath, or let everyone decide on their own! It can be really fun to let everyone choose different wreath styles and be surprised by what everyone ends up making.

SET UP THE PARTY

Whether you decide to enjoy the cooler weather on the back patio or have everyone at your dining room table, set up your craft station. You can grab a roll of kraft paper or some fall tablecloths from the Dollar store to decorate and place all of your wreath making supplies within easy reach of your guests. Make sure you are somewhere near an electrical outlet to plug in your glue guns, and plug in a power strip if you want multiple glue guns used at once. Set up a few fall treats and drinks somewhere close by for everyone to dig into!

Quick hostess tip: leave out a few empty serving dishes if guests are bringing something to contribute to make it easy for them to add their items.

GET THE PARTY STARTED

As each of your guests arrive, be sure to invite them to choose their spot where they will be making their wreath, unload any supplies and grab something yummy before the crafting begins!

Take a few moments to get everyone situated and then welcome them by sharing a little about what the night will look like and how the wreath making process will go. Make sure everyone knows where to find everything and what order of operations to follow to ensure they get to leave with a finished project!

ASSEMBLING YOUR WREATHS

If everyone knows what kind of wreath style they are after they can begin jumping right in and prepping their supplies; cutting flowers, tying bows, etc. Some friends may come with a Pinterest perfect vision in their head while others will just let the wind take them wherever they are meant to go! If anyone seems totally stuck on what to do, a great suggestion is to head to the Pinterest app and look up “fall wreath ideas.” Remind guests to be cautious when it comes to using wire cutters and hot glue guns to avoid injuries! Remember that things may get a little messy! Wreath making involves a lot of fallen leaves, faux flower parts and little bits and pieces falling to the wayside so prepare to sweep up after.

FREEZE YOUR FALL EVENING IN TIME

At the end of the night it might just look like the inside of a Hobby Lobby in the fall with so many different wreaths everywhere!

Take the opportunity of having all the girls together to grab a group photo with your wreaths. You can encourage everyone to snap a selfie of themselves with their wreath or when they get home share a photo of what it looks like on their door! Invite everyone to grab another treat or two while finishing the evening together and make sure to remind them to grab their new wreath on the way out.

My biggest advice is just to have fun and don’t worry about the details. Enjoy the time together hanging out and being creative, and that is what will make it a girls’ night to remember.

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October 2022 | 77

BY AMY HILL

This fall, expect customer-favorite flavor pumpkin spice to be making an appearance through the end of November. An exceptional after-dinner treat for Thanksgiving gatherings, a pumpkin spice Nothing Bundt Cake can last for up to five days in the refrigerator, leaving customers with plenty of leftovers. Pre-purchase themed cake toppers, candles and serving packs to enhance your party decor. Year-round flavor staples include decadent Chocolate Chocolate Chip, Red Velvet, White Chocolate Raspberry, Lemon, and Carrot to name just a few.

Ditch bland box cake mixes, and dry pre-baked desserts for your next big day. Why not spice up your celebration with a mouth-watering, postdinner treat without lifting a finger? Nothing Bundt Cakes has been serving customers nationwide since the late 1990s and has earned its reputation as being home to one of the best Bundt cakes in the country.

Nothing Bundt Cakes founders Dena Tripp and Debbie Shwetz used family recipes to tirelessly bake cakes and mix butter cream cheese frosting in order to perfect the Bundt cake. In fact, Nothing Bundt Cakes was created in their family kitchen 25 years ago. Currently, each Nothing Bundt Cakes location across America is staffed with a dedicated culinary team that is hard at work to ensure each season’s new flavors stand the test of time. With Nothing Bundt Cakes, customers and party guests never have to worry about their cakes being too dry or not having enough flavor.

With a variety of flavors and sizes to choose from, customers can purchase Nothing Bundt Cakes to serve anywhere from one to 20 individuals.

Bundtinis, or bite-sized Bundt cakes that pack a flavorful punch, are sold by the dozen. Bundlets are ideal for one to three people, while 8-inch Bundt cakes serve 8 to 10 guests. For up to 20 guests, a 10-inch Bundt cake is perfect. Step your cake game up a notch and purchase a tiered Bundt cake, which is handcrafted, beautifully wrapped and ready to serve for up to 30

Winston-Salem’s Nothing Bundt Cakes location recently celebrated its eight-year anniversary on September 24th. Last November, Nothing Bundt Cakes opened in Burlington, and Triad locals can expect to see a new location opening in High Point located in the Palladium Shopping Center as early as Spring 2023.

individuals. Interested in decorating your own cakes for birthday and holiday-themed parties?

Nothing Bundt Cakes offers more than 40 unique decorating kits, including kits that will wow Halloween party guests this October.

One of the most appealing aspects of Nothing Bundt Cakes, aside from the dubious deliciousness of its products, is how convenient customers find the cake pick-up and ordering process to be.

Online ordering makes for a seamless reservation, and customers can rest assured that their orders will be ready for a rapid in-store pick-up. To keep cakes in tip-top shape ahead of a party, event or simply just dessert after a family dinner, Nothing Bundt Cakes highly recommends refrigerating all

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cakes and removing them from the refrigerator approximately one to two hours prior to serving.

For Bundtinis and Bundlets, removing them from cold temperatures 20 to 30 minutes prior will be just the right amount of time to leave the cakes tasting and feeling fresh to serve, since Nothing Bundt Cakes truly shine at room temperature.

In 2013, Franchise Owner Traci Moore fell in love with Nothing Bundt Cakes at first sight. Blown away by Nothing Bundt Cakes, she decided that Winston-Salem would be the prime place to establish her first location. Traci and her team look forward to serving guests in their bakery daily and find joy in helping customers prepare for their big celebrations. Over the last eight years of operation, Traci and her team have learned many tricks of the baking and business trade, and credit her staff for much of Nothing Bundt Cakes’ growing success. According to Traci, “Most of our team members have been with us for more than four years. Without them and their dedication, there definitely wouldn’t be a Winston-Salem Nothing Bundt Cakes.”

Ready to place an order for your next family dinner or special event? Visit nothingbundtcakes.com to see flavor and size options, place an order and pre-purchase cake décor. Visit the Winston-Salem branch in person at 678 Saint George Square Court, and call the store directly at 336.306.9146 to speak with a team member.

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October 2022 | 79

This Morning’s

REFLECTION:

When Your Dog Looks Better Than You Do

BY RENEE SKUDRA

It is another introspection-filled pandemic day and I’m sitting at my keyboard thinking about starting an article about a Southern writer named Wiley Cash whose good fortune it is to live on the beautiful North Carolina coast in a history-driven city named Wilmington. Outside my window the leaves of the dogwood tree have begun to turn red and the autumn wind is whistling in a forlorn tone whose sounds punctuate a heretofore quiet landscape.

My Bichon Frise, Jackson, is watching me as he reclines comfortably on a velvet blanket that I purchased for a small fortune on the Etsy site. He is a study in canine beauty – all white fluffiness shaped into the breed standard by a careful and all-knowing groomer who reminds me regularly that “it takes at least six hours to make him look right.” If you know anything about the Bichon Frise, you’ll know this: he or she is a Diva Dog whose double-coat must be brushed daily. Once you have committed to owning this breed, there is an investiture of time and money that you must be willing to make, a labor of love that must be undertaken so your pet is a representation not only of his type, but of his very best self. All those baths and groomings cost a pretty penny which make him a stand-out dog: faux-diamond collar and leash, trendy pet clothes, toys and accessories which announce that he is royalty in the canine world.

I love this dog beyond all reason, he is my anchor in a never-ending anxiety storm. When the power goes out in

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my Greensboro home, he is by my side, soft as a cloud and yielding to the angst of any moment, supreme in the apparent confidence that this, too, shall pass. Looking at him I recall a friend’s casual comment that, “Your dog looks better than you do!” It is true that I myself have not been to the beauty salon or had my nails done since February 2020. I wince in the acuity of this observation because while I have gone without, that cannot be said of my Bichon Frise. I have taken virtually no pains with my appearance, wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans.

No one has fussed over my hair, massaging it with specialty shampoos and concoctions and blowing it expertly out. If truth be known, I yearn for someone to fuss over me with inordinate amounts of attention, getting me into a regal and glamorous shape. I’m missing the “perks” of single adult living: no expensive diets, clothes or toys and while my fur baby has pet insurance, I have limited insurance myself.

Still, I must admit to enjoying all the compliments about “your beautiful dog” and how passers-by cluster around him during his evening constitutional at Harmon Park. The bi-monthly visits to the groomer are worth the exhilaration I feel as I look at his geometrically perfect halo of white glistening hair and perfectly white combed out (but still curly) coat. His ambercolored eyes are the same beautiful hue as that precious stone in an antique ring bequeathed me by my Latvian in-laws.

I’m proud of my boy who elicits audible sounds of visceral pleasure from onlookers, as well as the occasional “Is he for sale?” Jackson knows he is beautiful, a centrifugal force of inspiring compliments, walking on the grass as a show dog might confidently traverse the contest ring, his gait measured and precise, elegant head held high. If you have been around Bichons, you are familiar with their undeniable charm and sense of humor. I wish I had half as much composure.

Nothing can sully his day – not a thunderclap or a yapping dog bent on undermining Jackson’s poise. He’s doggy royalty and he knows it.

As for me, I’m giving some thought to getting my own hair done and buying some new clothes. I’ll admittedly still follow the pricey regimens that my pooch is accustomed to. His groomer is a diva, too and any terse suggestions by her that I am not maintaining my Bichon Frise exactly as required makes me shake in my purchased-at-a-yardsale cowboy boots.

The two of them are a package deal and she’s a critical part of the taking-care-ofthe-dog infrastructure. I tolerate her criticisms because she is part and parcel of making him shine just as the breed standard demands.

A bumper sticker that I saw today on an old dented Honda made me laugh out loud – “My dog is in charge.” How well I know the truth of that sentiment. I can live with the quip that Jackson looks better than I do. As soon as I find another job, I’m hoping to work on that scenario.

PHOTO BY JODIE BRIM

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Anne Glenn

Owner, Best of Winston

BEST OF WINSTON

5 LOCAL VINEYARDS TO VISIT

If you’re looking for an afternoon escape, head to a local vineyard for a change of pace. Here we’re sharing 5 of our favorite local vineyards that are all within an easy drive of Winston-Salem. (And make sure to follow us on social media @bestofwinston for more inside info on the local food and drink front!)

1. MEDALONI CELLARS

About 15 minutes from downtown Winston-Salem is Medaloni Cellars, whose beautiful grounds feel like a peaceful respite. The main tasting room of Medaloni overlooks rolling hills, plus there are several areas for a quiet glass of wine. There are frequently food trucks on the weekend, and Medaloni rents 3 different cabins on the property for those wishing to extend their time. With great wine and a beautiful view so close to WinstonSalem, put Medaloni at the top of your list.

2. JOLO WINERY AND VINEYARDS

JOLO offers views of Pilot Mountain and awardwinning wine, plus a restaurant that serves brunch, lunch, and dinner. This is the perfect date spot, with an elevated ambience and delicious offerings. Opt to dine alfresco so you can enjoy the covered patio’s views, or upgrade to the reserve tasting flight. You will feel a bit of California Wine valley vibe here.

JOLO currently does not allow the under 21 crowd, so don’t bring the kids.

3. DYNAMIS ESTATE WINES

Though a newcomer, Dynamis is already making a name for itself for its outstanding wine. Located on a large estate about 40 minutes away, Dynamis

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is idyllic amidst rolling hills and orchards. There are plans to expand the tasting room and offer a restaurant in the future, but at this time, you can only order a variety of snacks (made fresh at a nearby deli - and truly delicious! - so we’d encourage you to try some). Dynamis can only be visited by making a reservation, but trust us, it’s worth it. Some of the best North Carolina wine we’ve ever tasted was at Dynamis.

4. DIVINE LLAMA VINEYARDS

What’s not to love about wine served next to llamas? Divine Llama certainly has a quirky charm that makes it a fun place to visit. The entire experience feels like you’re on a farm in the country (which you are!), so expect plastic cups and a friendly staff. Divine Llama frequently offers llama trekking and hosts food trucks on the weekend. To see the llamas, you do have to walk down a short path.

5. SHELTON VINEYARDS

This multi-generation family-run vineyard is just under an hour away from Winston-Salem. With a robust music offering, highly rated restaurant, gardens, and other events, Shelton Vineyards certainly encourages visitors to come and stay a while. Do a tasting experience in the main tasting room, then grab a glass and find a spot to sit around the large pond for a tranquil afternoon. In the summer, Shelton Vineyards puts on concerts in their amphitheater bringing in bands like The Embers for an evening of dancing under the stars. And if you don’t want to drive home, there is a Hampton Inn & Suites within walking distance.

Butcher & Bull

JEJ Photos

October 2022 | 83

Bad Decision?

BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

Stress Could Be the Culprit

This past summer, I made a bad decision. Okay, to be more kind, it was a “poor” decision. Once made, I couldn’t change it, and I have lived with the negative consequences ever since.

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

Licking my wounds and practicing self-forgiveness, I decided to take that sour lemon and turn it into an opportunity for “lemonade learning” by diving into “the why” behind the decision. Once I had calmed down a bit, I sensed that the culprit was stress; that I had chosen unwisely because I was stressed out and not thinking in my usual, level-headed manner. Then I went to research the issue and quickly homed in on what appeared to be in play. Ron Carucci, writing for the Harvard Business Review explained: “As research on decision-making shows, our brains are wired to be more reactionary under stress. In tough moments, we reach for premature conclusions rather than opening ourselves to more and better options. Faced with less familiar conditions for which our tried-and-true approaches won’t work, we reflexively counter our natural anxiety by narrowing and simplifying our options.” In other words, we become more reactive and far less analytical.

Which was exactly what I had done.

Another finding that seemed right on point was this: when a stressed-out person is faced with a difficult decision, they focus on the potential upsides in their options, as opposed to the downsides. This made me think of a former co-worker who decided to build his dream house in Florida. He focused on the positives of retiring in the “Sunny South” (yes, a proper noun, no less!) while downplaying the reality that he wouldn’t see his close-knit, extended family of 26 children and grandchildren nearly as often. In his case, the impact was so profound that he ended up selling the house and hot footing it back to New Jersey.

But not every decision can be undone.

MAKE A BETTER DECISION

The average person makes roughly 35,000 decisions a day. It sounds impossible, but when you think about it, deciding to look out the window at any given moment is as much a decision as is parking farther away from the Harris Teeter to get in a few more steps, or accepting that job offer in Timbuktu! The question is: how can we improve our decision-making – particularly when the practical or relational implications are high?

First: • Make managing your stress an ongoing priority • Avoid making “big” decisions when you are feeling stressed.

Then, • Create a context for decision-making You do this by creating some distance, some space. In other words, why not “sleep on it”? Clarity comes from calm, not from impulsivity or overwhelm. It can also help to: • Imagine that you are giving a friend advice on how to proceed We tend to be less emotional when it’s someone else’s decision – which is why this tip is right on target. Next, consider these two key skills: • Get better at identifying likely outcomes • Explore the desirability of each likely outcome Clearly, this requires us to slow down, to nip either-or thinking in the bud, and to temper the tendency to over-emphasize the positive aspects of an outcome. If my friend had done this, he may never have moved to the idyllic Sunny South in the first place, given his focus on family connection. It means pausing to consider the likely less-desirable aspects of a choice.

And finally, • Stay true to your values As I look back on my own decision faux pas, I realize that if I had indeed “slept on it,” and not over-emphasized the positive outcome of the decision I made, I would have chosen otherwise. What about you? What trips you up and how can you incorporate these tips and strategies to improve your decisionmaking process?

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Making Dollars, Making $ense Securities offered through LPL Financial, Member FINRA/SIPC, Investment advice offered through Independent Advisor Alliance, a registered investment advisor, Independent Advisor Alliance and Marzano Capital Group are separate entities from LPL Financial.

A Team-Oriented Approach

BY BRANDON JAMES, FINANCIAL ADVISOR

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to work with a financial advisor? What about having a team of advisors behind you? A team that works as a cohesive unit, building your financial plan, managing your risk and investments, all to help you confidently pursue your goals?

One of the key differentiators in Marzano Capital Group, as compared to other advisors and firms, is our team-oriented approach. This is a distinctive quality for a firm in our industry, as many advisors operate as solo-practitioners or in bank-led brokerage models. Client meetings, ongoing reviews, service, and ultimately investment selection and management are all things we collaborate on together. By operating in this manner, each person who walks through our door understands that we are all working for them and they have access to our entire team.

Another trait that sets us apart from many other advisors is our ability to truly put our clients first. We work for and are employed by our clients. Each of us on the team has a fiduciary responsibility to act in the best interest of the client regarding all recommendations and advice. We are not competing for sales goals and do not have incentives like many other firms. This positions us on the same side of the table as our clients, which is exactly where you want your advisor to be. Therefore, our focus is solely on each person we are fortunate enough to work with. In an article with Business Wire, 50% of Americans stated that they are certain they are working with a fiduciary advisor, while 38% have no idea if their advisor has taken the promise to put their clients’ best interests before their own and act in good faith to provide all relevant facts to clients (Business Wire, 2017).

Due to our size and scale and the efficiencies we have created, we have the ability to invest in potential clients before they invest in us. We want to educate our clients in the areas we are going to help them with and be sure they know what they own inside their portfolios and, more importantly, why they own them. A lot of what we do goes above and beyond the management of assets. We are fully engaged with each client in all things financial. Assessing life insurance needs and other risk-based topics, building financial plans and crafting budgets, creating income strategies and distribution plans are just a small slice of the value we strive to add.

At the end of the day, there are many advisors and firms in our area who do a good job for their clients. At Marzano Capital Group, we are constantly growing and continuing to build a team of individuals who complement each other. We feel that this team-oriented approach to financial planning creates continuity and long-term success for our clients.

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October 2022 | 87

Compassionate

Conflict

BY LESLIE SPEAS

Have you noticed that there are a lot of dissenting opinions in the world today? There are so many areas where we think differently – vaccines, government, abortion to name a few. And many people are very passionate and vocal about their positions. And guess what? This can result in conflict.

But all is not lost. When managed biblically and compassionately, conflict can help us to maintain and grow our relationships.

BELOW ARE SOME GUIDELINES FOR COMPASSIONATE CONFLICT MANAGEMENT. Before you respond to the situation:

Plan a time to discuss when you are both well-rested and in a good state of mind to be objective and show compassion to the other party.

Clearly define the issue and keep the discussion focused on it.

I used to be really good at dredging up all kinds of things from the past (and may still do this on occasion). It’s best to stay focused and not rehash past issues or hurts.

Take a break, think it through, and pray about your response.

Doing this may prevent crucial mistakes which can negatively impact the relationship. Proverbs has some good advice that encourages us to take a pause – “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control” (Proverbs 29:11).

Affirm the relationship.

Think about whether it is worth your time and effort to address the situation. Then, reflect on your own attitudes, strengths, and weaknesses and whether you may have contributed to the situation. It’s hard to believe but sometimes the problem may be more about us than the other person.

Once you share your feelings, lean in and listen actively to the other person’s perspective.

Make sure that your body language, tone of voice, and other actions convey that you are open to their viewpoint.

No eye-rolling, shrugging, or sighing allowed – even if you want to! Summarize and reflect back to the individual what you believe you have heard.

If you are moving forward with addressing the conflict situation: Press forward slowly, with forethought and self-control.

Jesus provides us with direction for approaching someone in a conflict situation. Matthew 18:15 says, “If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you won your brother over.” I believe this is an encouragement to go to the other person and speak with them alone – without sharing with others, without gossiping about it, and without trying to recruit others to your side. This will provide a much better chance of restoring the relationship.

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BELOW ARE SOME ADDITIONAL GUIDELINES TO USE:

For example, “Our relationship is important to me, so I wanted to discuss something that has been on my mind with you. I feel hurt when you cancel the plans we have made at the last minute.”

Show compassion and kindness.

Propose a solution.

When working toward a solution, consider Philippians 2:4-5: “Each of you should look not to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.” Strive for solutions that keep everyone’s best interests in mind.

What if the other person isn’t receptive to your efforts and/or willing to resolve the conflict?

Then, as hard as it may be, forgive just as God in Christ has forgiven you. “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God” (Matthew 5:9).

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October 2022 | 89

Embracing the power of positivity can benefit your life and livelihood in many ways. Seeing the world through rose colored glasses can help you focus on the good and what to be grateful for.

BY SUSAN BB SCHABACKER

Getting Your Hold on Happiness to Enable Hope, Healing and Empowerment

It’s not always rainbows and butterflies, but sometimes when life gives us lemons we need to remember how refreshing lemons can be. The more you feel empowered to move your mindset and shift your perspective to the healthy and positive, the better off you’ll feel and be.

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Make a short “happy” list and keep it handy, whether on your phone (in your notes, doc, or pic) or printed out. Think: “In sight, in mind.” The more you review your list, which can vary from time to time and can always be adapted, the more you’ll be able to focus on your happiness. And, your happiness has a ripple effect on the people, animals, and even plants around you.

Also, the happier you are, the more you’ll be able to tap into achieving your greatest potential. If all you see are rain clouds and neglect to see the rainbow created by the sun shining through the storm, you’ll be missing out on the magical beauty of the hope you have to hold onto.

It also helps to be around people who bring you up, not down.

How depressed and dismal would Eeyore feel if he weren’t around his friends, Pooh, Piglet, and Roo to lift his spirits, comfort and encourage him.

He may have had a constant rain cloud hanging over him, looking through a lens of only shades of gray, but just being around them brought much needed rays of sunshine and color to his otherwise colorless world.

Rid yourself of shame or judgment about feeling down in the dumps and remember you’re not alone. You’re never alone. Whether it’s once-in-ablue-moon blues or serious, chronic depression that ails you, there are many who can relate.

You’re not without help or support.

Be honest with yourself and others about your true feelings to help get the help you need. Seek to better understand your current status - how you feel and why you might feel this

way. Reflect on past situations so you have a greater perspective and scope of reference. Maybe what’s bogging you down is something you’ve carried with you all the way from childhood or even babyhood, unwanted heavy baggage you’ve never truly let go of that continues to weigh you down.

Once you delve deep into memories, you’ve already taken steps in the right direction.

Hard work and ample time may be needed to uncover, understand, heal, and move forward from sometimes painful and even traumatic memories, but in doing so, you’re enabling and empowering yourself to overcome and thrive, not just survive. It’s not always an easy task, so be patient with yourself, your supporters, and the process. Set your worries and fears aside, ask for help as needed, and feel reassured you will make it through as a stronger, wiser person and ultimately better off.

We are each uniquely created so tap into your own innate loves, likes, wants, and desires as you take to heart some of the following tips and hacks for happiness: • Get and give hugs (air hugs are also an option) • Get fit and have fun with a dance party movin’ and groovin’ to your fav music • Pamper party and spa day/night • Meal and a movie • Gather garden edibles and bouquets (meadow flowers are a happy option) to give and display in a vase • Substitute yummy, healthier foods and beverages • Get artsy and craftsy with decoratables and wearables (which make great handcrafted gifts) • Tea party with a theme (e.g. Alice in Wonderland/Japanese geishas and samurais/British afternoon) • Nature walk, fishing and camping trip • Beach bound to soak up sun (while wearing sunscreen), dig toes into (and exfoliate with) sand, collect seashells (for DIY arts and crafts), and surf (whether you wade or dive in; surf’s up, dudette!)

Good news: There are excellent and plentiful resources in your community, online, and worldwide to assist you and help you recover, get happier, and live a healthier, better life.

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ARE YOU

CLIMBING

THE WRONG LADDER? R E E VA L U AT I N G YO U R C A R E E R PAT H AT A N Y S TA G E .

BY TARYN JEREZ

I love asking my nieces and nephews, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I get responses that include everything from art teacher to astronaut! It’s amazing hearing the excitement and creativity behind every answer but my favorite part is re-asking that same question every year or so because their answers change so frequently.

If you answered “no” to one of more of these questions it may be a sign that you’re climbing the wrong ladder! Do you really want to move up in your current career path or move to something new entirely? It’s easy to get up and go to work every day without taking inventory of your needs and how your career plays into them, but it makes a world of difference when you do.

Your answers matter!

When we are growing up the world seems so full of possibility and when we think about our future career, there is that hunger and excitement to find something that we truly love!

If you are faced with the reality that it may be time for a change but you aren’t exactly sure what to do next here are a few questions to think on: • What are you really good at/what do you enjoy doing?

• What are you genuinely looking for in a career?

• What lifestyle do you want your career to support?

What answer would you have given as a five year old?

What about at age twelve or sixteen? How about right now? Chances are your answer evolved over time, just like you did as a person.

The truth is that as we grow in our careers, we build on our wisdom, confidence and perspective and those things can fundamentally change us. We are meant to evolve our entire lives, not just as children. So why is it that, as adults, it’s so common to feel stuck in one career path? Especially when something else may be calling our name?

When was the last time you asked yourself, “Am I climbing the wrong ladder?”

Here’s what this might sound like: • Does the trajectory I’m on support the career I really want?

• Does the career I have support the life I want?

• Does the answer to these questions sit well with me?

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All of these are important but especially the last one because too often it’s overlooked. If your current career doesn’t allow you the schedule, flexibility, purpose or income you want, take those things into consideration as you begin looking for your new ladder.

Is changing career paths scary? Absolutely, but remember that Lewis Carroll once said, “In the end we only regret the chances we didn’t take.” Risk taking is a skill that you have to push yourself into sometimes to learn and get better. Maybe that journey of hopping from your current ladder onto the next one feels frightening, but think about how much more frightening it is to look back and realize you didn’t take the risk that could have paid off in the end.

When you challenge yourself to answer questions honestly about your current career and your feelings around it, you may discover something you didn’t know you were after. Don’t keep climbing the current ladder you’re on just to wind up on top of the wrong building! Bet on yourself and take that first step towards a new path.

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Despite Daily Distractions

BY SUSAN BB SCHABACKER

Even those without ADHD can have their attention overstimulated and challenged by all sorts of daily distractions.

Our brains and mind-body-spirit connection have more power over our lives than we sometimes realize.

Here are some tools, tips and techniques to try to help you keep your calm, maintain your concentration, and stay focused on your busy life. The more you exercise and practice this, like a muscle, the stronger you’ll be at not letting those daily ubiquitous distractions deter you from who and what you want to be focusing on or the task at hand.

How effectively can a building be constructed without a blueprint or a business without a business plan? Integrate your plan and planning into your daily routines, review your goals and remind yourself of your mission and vision. Stay better on course by charting your course along the way. It may take some reassessing and refocusing, so do a much needed “refresh” like you would your browser after it times out.

Take 5, 10, or 15 with some R & R and deep breathing. As hard as we may work and as productive as we may want to be, we have to remember we’re humans, not robots. Even if you’re like the Energizer Bunny, we all need to recharge our batteries to keep going. Sometimes it’s important to take a break, have a change of scenery, and physically and mentally step away from the task at hand before coming back to it.

If you’re having a difficult time just getting back into the mental state of continuing to work on a project, set the worries aside. They can easily become blockages that obstruct your path from proceeding.

Instead, focus your mind and energy around the positive aspects that you want to achieve and the feelings you have in the process of achieving them. It should feel good and rewarding. Be your own cheerleader and encourage yourself. You’re further along than you were just mere seconds ago and you’re making progress, no matter how slowly it may seem.

Before you get too thoroughly invested in something or someone, consider the pros versus cons. Worth your time, money, and energy? Do the pros outweigh the cons?

And consider risks versus rewards. There may be risks involved, but some are worth taking and the more you concentrate on the rewards and positive reinforcement, generally the better outcome you’ll have.

Treat yourself to something healthy (and yummy to your tummy) when you’ve accomplished something. Baby steps can add up into gigantic strides and eventually cover miles and miles of ground. Also, chart and document your progress along the way. Snap a few behind the scenes pics and share via social media or just to review later and reflect on.

Once you’ve prioritized what and who to focus on, such as the top 3 items, factoring in time sensitivity/urgency/deadlines and meaningfulness/importance, congratulate yourself. You’ve already accomplished a lot more than you think by figuring and plotting out your direction.

Clear the clutter and create a cleaner environment. A tidier, more controlled (and more breathable - plants are always welcome) work and living space will help you re-center and refocus.

Energy work (like qigong and reiki) and essential oils can soothe your senses and improve your mental clarity. Clearing your energy and removing blockages can make a world of difference in the way you feel and think. Your mind, body, and spirit will be more aligned and you’ll be able to improve your concentration.

Simply breathing in a few whiffs of pure essential oils can have health benefits and help you concentrate while boosting your cognition.

Maximize your aromatherapy experience with a massage (even a 5 minute DIY massage) with essential oils added to carrier oils like fractionated coconut oil, olive oil, avocado oil, apricot kernel oil, and jojoba oil. Utilize reflexology by massaging hands, feet, ears, scalp, neck, shoulders, or full body.

For energizing and awakening effects, try eucalyptus, rosemary, mints (peppermint and spearmint) and citrus (lemon and orange). For relaxing and calming effects, try lavender, chamomile, ylang ylang, and jasmine.

For grounding and centering effects, try cedarwood, sage, patchouli, and sandalwood.

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Eight Great Movies Inspired

by Favorite Southern Books

BY KAREN COOPER

The next time you’re looking for a great movie to watch, consider one of your favorite southern-themed books for inspiration. What’s more entertaining than watching movies based on the characters we already know and love? Here are some you might want to watch for the first time or watch for the 10th time!

COLD MOUNTAIN (2003)

Based on the National Book award-winning novel by Charles Frazier, this movie is set in North Carolina during the Civil War. It stars Jude Law, Nicole Kidman, and Renee Zellweger. A wounded Confederate soldier deserts his unit and travels a long way to get back to a woman he barely knows, but with whom he shared a brief but significant bond. Back at home, his beloved struggles to keep her home and herself together with the help of some good friends.

THE COLOR PURPLE (1985)

Alice Walker’s 1982 book won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction and the National Book Award. Soon after, it was adapted into a film starring Whoopi Goldberg, Oprah Winfrey, and Danny Glover, and directed

by Steven Spielberg. Celie, an African American woman living in the South in the early 1900s survives horrific abuse and prejudices of the time. She is married off to the worst kind of man, “Mister” and is left to find companionship where she can.

She has a sister she truly loves and through sheer will and determination she continues to persevere and finds a way to live in the world on her terms.

FRIED GREEN TOMATOES (1991)

Based on the book Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg, this film, which is set in Alabama in the 1920s stars Kathy Bates, Jessica Tandy, Mary Stuart Masterson, Cicely Tyson, and Mary-Louise Parker. A frustrated housewife visiting a nursing home, meets a fascinating old woman who shares captivating tales from her past. As the old woman continues to tell her stories, the two become good friends and the housewife gains the courage to change her own life for the better.

THE SECRET LIFE OF BEES (2008)

The Secret Life of Bees brings to life Sue Monk Kidd’s popular novel. It’s set in South Carolina in the 1960s and stars Queen Latifah, Paul Bettany, Jennifer Hudson, and Dakota Fanning. Preoccupied by memories of her dead mother and abused by her father, 14-year-old Lily runs away with her friend and caregiver to the South Carolina town that may hold the key to her mother’s past. While there, Lily meets three sisters who take her under their wing and teach her about beekeeping, honey, and the Black Madonna.

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MY DOG SKIP (2000)

Based on the memoir by Willie Morris, and starring Frankie Muniz, Diane Lane, Luke Wilson and Kevin Bacon, this movie follows a shy boy growing up in 1940s Mississippi. He starts to open up to the world with the help of a mischievous family dog named, Skip. My Dog Skip is a feelgood movie about a boy and his dog in a small, sleepy Southern town that teaches us about family, friendship, love, devotion, trust, and bravery.

THE HELP (2009)

The Help is based on a historical fiction novel by American author Kathryn Stockett. The movie stars Emma Stone, Viola Davis, and Octavia Spencer in a tale of the relationships between white Southerners and their African American maids.

Unforgettable characters lead the viewer on a journey through their experiences with the best and worst of Mississippi (and the South in general) in the 1960s.

THE PRINCE OF TIDES (1991)

Based on the book of the same name

by Pat Conroy, this drama starring Barbara Streisand and Nick Nolte is set in New York and South Carolina. A New York psychiatrist whose patient is an emotionally troubled woman asks to discuss her South Carolina family’s troubled past with the woman’s twin brother. The brother and the psychiatrist become close allies as he tells the story of the twins’ fraught South Carolina upbringing.

TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD (1962)

Harper Lee’s 1960 novel won the Pulitzer Prize and was adapted into a popular movie starring Gregory Peck, Mary Badham, Estelle Evans, and Robert Duvall. In small-town Alabama, Scout Finch and her older brother Jem spend much of their time with their friend Dill, spying on their mysterious neighbor, Boo Radley. When their widowed father, a respected lawyer, defends a black man against fabricated rape charges, the trial and related events subject the children to the evils of racism and stereotyping.

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BY JEAN MARIE JOHNSON

There are few words as “loaded” as forgiveness. We hear it, we nod in recognition, and think: Why is it so hard? Or I know I should forgive, but…

The Mayo Clinic provides this insight: “Being hurt by someone, particularly someone you love and trust, can cause anger, sadness and confusion. If you dwell on hurtful events or situations, grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility can take root.”

You have probably been there. I have. We pay a big price when we hold on to these powerful emotions: • Bringing anger and bitterness into our relationships and experiences • Becoming absorbed in how we were wronged, preventing us from enjoying the present • Becoming depressed or anxious • Feeling that our life lacks meaning or purpose, or battling with our beliefs and values • Becoming distant from others No one wants to live from that place.

Forgiveness is the key to moving forward because it is the release of resentment and anger.

We want that, but we may hold back forgiveness because we mistakenly believe that to forgive means: • to forget, as if it didn’t happen • that whatever caused the pain was no big deal • simply picking up where you left off in the relationship

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Forgiveness is none of that, because: it did happen, it was a big deal to you, and you can’t just go back to “before.” This is precisely why some say that forgiveness is mainly for you. Yes, it usually makes the other person feel better, less burdened, less guilty. But you don’t control how much of that actually happens. So, here’s the thing - forgiveness allows you to get on with your life. It creates a kind of peace that research tells us can contribute to: • Healthier relationships • Improved mental health • Less anxiety, stress and hostility • Lower blood pressure • Fewer symptoms of depression • A stronger immune system • Improved heart health • Improved self-esteem

EMPATHIZE WITH THEM

AUTHENTIC FORGIVENESS IS KEY

COMMIT

We know from past experience that saying “I forgive you” or “It’s fine” will not bring about a release of resentment or anger.

Authentic forgiveness is grounded in a genuine willingness to let it go. I’ve looked at several models for practicing forgiveness and found the one offered by Dr. Everett Worthington particularly realistic and approachable. It includes these key steps:

RECALL THE HURT Face the fact that you’ve been hurt. Don’t be nasty and hurtful, and don’t treat yourself like a victim, or the other person unkindly. Truly decide that you will forgive without retribution. Remember that she is a valuable person and so are you.

Pretend that the other person is sitting in an empty chair across from you. Talk to them from your heart. Then, when you’ve gotten it all out, sit in their chair. Talk back to the imaginary you in a way that helps you see why the other person might have wronged you. Perhaps you feel empathy for them, or maybe gain an understanding of their actions. You may be reminded that people sometimes lash out from their own hurts or disappointments, or that you were the trigger for their “hot button” issue.

ALTRUISTIC GIFT Extend your forgiveness as an unselfish, altruistic gift. You remember how you felt when someone forgave you, right? You were released from a particular type of misery and felt freed. In other words, forgive unselfishly.

Seal your forgiveness by writing a note to yourself – on a post-it or in your phone. It could be a few words such as “I have forgiven Lexi.”

This simple act helps bring closure.

HOLD ONTO FORGIVENESS Remind yourself that you have released your hurt, anger, and resentment. We humans have a way of forgetting this. So, as often as you need to, go back and look at that note you wrote to yourself.

If forgiveness is a challenge right now, explore this and other models more deeply or, consider reaching out to a trusted friend, counselor, or therapist. Why? Because forgiveness is essential to a well-lived life.

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The Early Church

BY ANGELIA CORNATZER

The Fellowship of the Believers, Acts: 2:42-47 “And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.”

This is one of my favorite passages of scripture because we see so much beauty and power in the way these believers lived loving God and each other. Let’s look at the way they lived and it will be an encouragement and refocusing for our lives with God and others.

This group of early believers had just seen the most extraordinary and powerful events in the days before, including 3,000 people becoming Christians.

They continued in their faith by dedicating themselves to continuing and deepening their knowledge.

How can you dedicate yourself to obtaining a deeper knowledge of God this week?

They were absolutely not alone.

Their lifestyle was one defined by sharing. They shared ups, downs, meals, responsibilities, and they shared a deep love for God. They were devoted to living in likeminded community.

How can you share your life with someone this week?

Breaking bread and prayer was a way that they remembered Jesus’ sacrifice together. They made it a point to be aware of what God had done for them. They devoted themselves to honoring and praising God in this way.

How can you choose to honor and praise God this week?

They did not feel apathetic towards the Lord, but they were in awe of Him. Their souls took a posture of worship and reverence as they lived this way.

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Take time to reflect and journal on all that God has done for you.

Seeing evidence of God’s power and goodness all around them through signs and wonders was a part of life because they were devoting life to God. They were ready and pure vessels, so God was working through and amongst them.

Pray that God would use you for His will and works.

They continued a life of sharing and togetherness.

They practiced selflessness and serving for the sake of those in need. The things they owned did not matter as much as loving those in need as Jesus would.

What can you give to those in need this week?

It was part of their every day to attend the temple together and share a meal together. Their hearts were open to God and each other. Their homes were a place of fellowship and community. It was a daily rhythm of life to worship and dine together.

Who can you share a meal with this week?

Their hearts were not selfish and rushed or unsatisfied and striving, but glad and generous.

Even simply at a meal time, there was evidence of their hearts being delighted and selfless.

How is your heart? Pray God would strengthen your heart to be glad and generous this week.

Praising God was just what they did. Blessing and honoring the Lord was a habit and routine they carried through each moment of their day. They did not have hostility with people, they enjoyed favor together. Their eyes and hearts were fixed on the right thing: giving God praise.

Spend time reflecting and praising God for who He is.

They were obedient and faithful to God, and God brought fruit. They simply lived in awe of God and selflessly loved each other, and God was the one who added to their number.

Pray that God would add day by day people being saved in Forsyth County.

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October 2022 | 101

Down with the

DRAMA

BY LESLIE SPEAS

Are you tired of dealing with drama? Do you have anyone in your life that you would classify as a drama queen? As I have gotten older, I have less tolerance for drama. I just want to be around peaceful people, do positive things, and enjoy life.

So, what is a drama queen? This is a woman who makes every issue and problem about her. Drama usually surrounds her and, if it isn’t already there, she will create it. And keep in mind that there are plenty of drama kings out there as well!

Here are some behaviors that are common with drama queens and kings - they tend to: • Keep tabs on everyone just in case material is needed to create drama • Make a big deal out of little things • Stir things up by gossiping and manipulating to cause trouble and arguments with others • Never see themselves as part of the problem – there is always someone or something else to blame • Never be satisfied unless they get their way • Demand compassion but extend none • Dramatically share the highs and lows of their lives and expect others to ooh and aah over the things they share • Like being the center of attention and thrive on the chaos they create So, what can you do to deal with the drama they create? If the drama queen is a friend or acquaintance, you may be able to distance yourself. However, if it’s a coworker or family member, it may be a little more difficult. Below are five strategies that you can consider employing to decrease the drama!

SEE THE HUMAN BEHIND THE DIFFICULT BEHAVIOR I don’t think that most people are difficult just for the sake of being difficult. There is usually some underlying reason that is motivating them to act this way. They may create drama as a result of their own pain. Looking at it from this perspective may help you to be more understanding and tolerant of these behaviors.

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TREAT THEM WITH RESPECT, EMPATHY, AND KINDNESS Many people operate under a constant feeling of not being appreciated or respected. This could be due to previous life or work experience. Showing them empathy by saying things like, “I imagine it’s difficult to be in your situation” can help the person to feel understood and valued.

EXAMINE YOURSELF Drama queens aren’t generally very self-aware. In fact, you may hear them say, “I don’t do drama.” So, who knows? You might be one!

We are all probably somebody else’s difficult person at some point in time. Sometimes the reason people rub us the wrong way can be found by simply taking a good look at ourselves. Some people may remind us of past hurts, which can dredge up past pain. If we stop and ask ourselves why we are reacting in that way, the answer may be in your past. In doing so, we may gain some insight about ourselves that will help in the future.

SET BOUNDARIES AND STANDARDS AROUND WHAT YOU WILL TOLERATE If you don’t have the time or patience to deal with drama, give the other person some feedback about how their behavior is making you feel (see last month’s article on High Impact Feedback). If you show empathy and compassion initially and the drama continues, you may have to end the interaction kindly and set some boundaries around your time in the future.

DON’T ENABLE THEM If they come with you to share a problem or complaint, redirect them and encourage them to stick to the facts (which they generally don’t do). Further, put the problem or issue back on them and ask what they plan to do about it. If you do this a few times, they may stop interacting with you as often.

SO, GO FORWARD, KEEP CALM AND STAY DRAMA-FREE!

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BY TARYN JEREZ OF ONECRAFTYMISS.COM

Why Getting Organized Now Will Determine Your Holiday Sales This column is meant to serve as a resource for readers who seek inspiration and knowledge for building their own small business brands. Through actionable advice, find the encouragement to help you keep living your life with hustle and heart.

If you are anything like me, you’re looking at the calendar and can’t believe it’s already October! The truth is, from here on out 2022 is full speed ahead and that means the winter holidays will be here before we know it!

For most small businesses the largest sales season is right around the corner which makes this month the perfect time to start establishing your holiday sales plan! From narrowing down your offers to deciding on promotions and planning your marketing efforts, keep reading to learn how to organize it all and set yourself up for your best holiday sales!

FINALIZE YOUR HOLIDAY & END-OF-YEAR OFFERS Think about what your current offers are and which ones you want to concentrate on promoting during the last quarter of the year. Consider which offers are most likely to take a back seat to customers’ needs during this time of year versus those that will be even more sought after. Are there new products or services you want to introduce or bring back for the holidays? How about any giftable offers that could do well with your audience as they are shopping for loved ones? The way we look at what we sell should evolve throughout the seasons because customer spending habits and priorities absolutely do. Once you have each offer that you’ll be selling finalized, make a quick list and let any team members know who will benefit from this information.

PLAN OUT YOUR PROMOTIONS Come holiday time it can be very overwhelming to first start creating promotions which can often lead to quick decisions that end up losing you money. Allow your focus to come from creating a promotions experience for your customers rather than a random sale to encourage them to purchase. Try choosing something specific to what your customer finds valuable! Perhaps it’s about offering free gift wrap with a custom card for items from your shop or doing a free gift or donation on their behalf when they purchase a certain amount or book a specific service? For discounts you plan to offer, what could help them see added value and excitement but not take away from your bottom line? Think about things that encourage your customer to hit a specific threshold transaction amount or encourage them to buy or book more with you.

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GET ORDERS AND BOOKINGS IN EARLY

ESTABLISHING YOUR TIMELINE

Now that you know what you’ll be offering, it’s time to get everything you’ll need to get your products or services into customers’ hands, both literally and figuratively. If you need any physical items, start ordering them now to avoid shipping delays. This could include supplies to make products, shipping and handling items, promotional collateral, client gifts and more! If you plan to book any specific services to help you during the holidays, begin looking into who you’ll be working with and checking their availability early on. You may need to bring on a photographer, virtual assistant, social media manager to help with holiday marketing efforts, etc. Make this a priority now so you don’t miss out.

This time of year, your calendar is your BFF in your business! It will help you stay on top of your marketing, shop or website updates, inventory needs, and your own personal life! Consider getting very specific with your dates and include even the smallest reminders and deadlines to help you stay on top of everything. Create your calendar in a way that is realistic for you to stick to! Start with any dates you are personally unavailable due to holiday plans to avoid overlap and overwhelm! Have things like inventory delivery, promotions going live, client gifts mailed, social media content ready, shipping cut-offs and more all with an understanding of your holiday timeline as a whole.

Hustle & Heart Challenge

This month, challenge yourself to think ahead to the upcoming holiday season and decide what your main sales goal is and how you’re going to get there! Confirm which offers you are going to be selling and what you need to do in order to get those offers into your ideal customers’ hands over the next few months!

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Patiently Rooted

BY KELLI MESSICK,

OWNER OF PATIENTLY ROOTED

What plants are good

for my lighting?

Hi, plant friends! My name is Kelli and my goal is to help more people become plant people and see all the amazing benefits plants can bring to your life.

As the founder and owner of Patiently Rooted, a company dedicated to spreading the word about the benefits of plants, I have always had a love of nature and plants, and now I want to share my obsession with other people.

PLANT LIGHTING TERMS A common question among new or experienced plant owners is: what type of light does this plant need?

Most people buy plants based on this preference so they can make sure the plant will thrive in their space. A misconception that most people have is that since they have dark lighting in their house or not enough natural light, they can’t own a house plant – which is wrong. There are plenty of plants that can survive in lower lighting and some that prefer it.

When talking about lighting there are a few terms you might hear. These include Direct, Bright Indirect, Medium, and Low light. Direct light is when the sun is directly hitting the plant’s leaves.

This is usually in the window or directly in front of the window. Bright Indirect is when the plant is close to the source of light but the light might not be directly on the leaves. This is usually a couple feet from the window. Medium is in the middle of the room where the plant will still get a majority of the light coming in the room. Low light is considered the back of the room or even a corner of the room that is anywhere from 8-10 ft away from the light coming in.

You will also hear a lot of people talk about east, south and west facing windows being the best spots for plants. This is usually true, but there are a few plants that would do well in north facing windows, too. Most people prefer to put their plants near a south facing window because it gets light in it a majority of the day. If you only have windows on the east or west, don’t worry, there are lots of plants that will enjoy the hours of the sun they will get in the morning or evening. For the north facing windows or side of the house, I would stick with lower light plants to fit in the space.

Plant Recommendations Based on Lighting

DIRECT LIGHT If you have a lot of direct light or places near your window, here are some plants I recommend for that space. Succulents and cacti are obvious choices but one of my favorite choices is a Bird of Paradise. They love direct light and only need to be watered every two weeks. Some other good options are pothos and snake plants. These are both beginner plants needing very little care.

BRIGHT INDIRECT LIGHT This is the most common light people have because they can’t get plants right next to the window. My recommendation would be a Pilea Chinese Money plant. They thrive in this lighting and only need to be watered every two weeks or when the leaves start to droop. Other great options are Fiddle Leaf Figs and Ficus Audreys.

MEDIUM LIGHT There are a ton of plants that are perfect for medium light. Some of my favorites include prayer plants, Calatheas, and Peperomias.

A rule of thumb for plants in this lighting and low light is to make sure the soil is mostly dry before you water it. Since they are not getting a lot of sun, you want to make sure you aren’t overwatering it.

LOW LIGHT The best low light plants I can recommend are the Snake Plant and the ZZ (Zamioculcas zamiifolia). These are beautiful plants that bring any darker spot in your house some life and greenery. For these plants make sure they dry out completely between waterings, they also only like to be watered every two to three months. These are great low maintenance plants that can actually survive in any lighting situation.

I hope this lighting guide is helpful for you as you pick out your next plant!

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WOMEN ON THE MOVE REV. VICTORIA REID, M.DIV

Rev. Victoria Reid, M.Div is the Hospice Chaplain for Well Care Hospice in Advance serving families in seven surrounding counties. “I have served as the Associate Pastor Outreach and Family Ministries of Fairview Moravian Church in Winston-Salem and as the Intentional Transitional Interim Associate Pastor of Kernersville Moravian Church,” said Victoria. She served from 2018-2022 on the Board of Trustees for Salem Academy and College in Winston-Salem and currently has served the last five and a half years on the Board of Directors for Laurel Ridge Camp, Conference and Retreat Center in Laurel Springs, as chairwoman for 2019 and 2020. In December of 2021, Victoria offered the Invocation for the Carolina Panthers vs. Tampa Bay Buccaneers NFL game in Charlotte. She earned her bachelor’s degree in Religion from Salem College, a Master of Divinity degree from Wake Forest University’s School of Divinity and earned a Certificate of Studies from Moravian Theological Seminary in 2017. Victoria also completed one unit of Clinical Pastoral Education with Wake Forest Baptist Faith Health Department in 2017. She was ordained in the Moravian Church Southern Province in July 2017. In 2019, Victoria became a certified Intentional Transitional Interim Pastor. She also volunteers with Forsyth County chapter of the USMC Toys for Tots program. As a single mother, in her spare time, she enjoys spending time with her two children and two dogs, anything sports related, traveling, snow skiing, finding sand and warm water with cool breezes anywhere she can, and she loves to try new foods.

ANNIE CAMP

Annie Camp is a morning show host for 93.1 The Wolf at Audacy. She grew up in the Triad and fell in love with radio at a young age when her father was working at a radio station. “I love what I do, and the people are what make my job fulfilling,” said Annie. She graduated with honors from Forsyth Technical Community College with an associate’s degree in broadcast production and technology.

Annie was nominated for an ACM Award for On Air Personality of the Year in a Large Market. “I enjoy getting to work special events like concerts and getting to know people,” she said. In her spare time, Annie enjoys hanging out with her family, including her husband, Danny, and her son, Franklin, as well as her friends. She also spends time crafting, organizing and being a mom to her plant babies!

JOANNE FROST

Joanne Frost is the photographer and owner of Joanne Frost Photography. Joanne moved to Winston-Salem in the summer of 2019 and made the decision to pursue her dream career of becoming a photographer. Starting a new business in a new state and not knowing anyone was always going to be hard but, nonetheless, Joanne is making a successful start to her business, offering not just senior portraits but a full senior experience. Every portrait session is customized to reflect everything high school has meant to her clients. As an added bonus, in 2021, Joanne partnered with Armored Self-Defense, and now, every senior client gets access to a complimentary self-defense seminar to help them take care of themselves as they move onto the next chapter in their lives. In addition to offering the senior experience, Joanne also runs two successful spokesmodel teams of high school juniors and seniors.

Both teams work with Joanne for a full school year and receive multiple portrait sessions and events, building their confidence every step of the way. Joanne also likes to give back to the community, and every year, she partners with a non-profit organization to help bring funds, exposure and awareness to their businesses. In the fall months, Joanne enjoys doing family portraits, but when she doesn’t have her camera in her hand, she loves to spend quality time with her family and their pet boxer, Skye.

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HALEY SLIMMERWASHINGTON Haley Slimmer-Washington is a content creator with 1.1 million Pinterest views, 88,000 TikTok followers and an up and coming podcast host. Haley credits her mom, Lisa, her aunt, Stephanie, and her husband, Rashawn, with her success. “I am a stay-at-home mom that enjoys sharing food places in the Triad, my faith, honest motherhood struggles and creating content for myself and others,” said Haley. Haley is also a blood clot survivor and endometriosis warrior.

COURTNEY SMITH

Courtney Smith is the artist and designer behind Creatives by Courtney, a design studio specializing in bringing brands to life for small business owners and entrepreneurs locally and across the country. She offers a branding package that gives business owners all the graphic elements they need to build a professional and consistent brand presence in-person and online. She graduated from Appalachian State University with her BFA in graphic design in 2015 and has been working in the industry ever since. Courtney is a North Carolina native with a huge heart for design, but there are a few other things that share an equal piece of her heart. She lives for tacos, sunshine, sweaty workouts, quality time with her fiancé and taking her English bulldog on trips for a pup-cup and iced coffee in the mornings. Last, but not least, she loves planning events with her fellow organizers for Women-Owned NC.

SAMANTHA DILMORE

Samantha Dilmore is a Realtor® with Samantha Dilmore Realty, LLC – JPAR Legacy Group. She describes her job as giving her the honor of helping numerous families find their dream homes as well as invest in their future through Real Estate. “I pride myself on always delivering a high quality, positive and fun real estate experience,” said Samantha. “I have an eye for interior design and décor as well as a passion for helping others and making a sincere impact on those around me. My favorite part about real estate is to negotiate for my clients, and to get them in their dream home.” In her spare time, Samantha enjoys spending time with her husband, four children and golden retriever Skye, with an iced coffee in her hand.

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Plantable Edibles to Grow in Your NC Garden this Fall/Autumn

BY SUSAN BB SCHABACKER

Make sure to grow your plants in plenty of sunshine and keep them well-watered. Clear any dead debris that could easily become a fertile breeding ground for hosts of insects and bugs, potentially soon-to-be rapidly spreading bugaboos for any garden and gardener.

Try some of the following tips to protect your garden from weeds and ravenous pests:

• Garlic and onions • Root veggies: carrots, beets, and parsnips • Leafy veggies: kale, swiss chard, arugula, spinach, and lettuce • Cruciferous veggies: broccoli, cabbage, and Brussels sprouts • Fruit trees: figs and pomegranates • Herbs: parsley, cilantro, and dill • Flowers: sunflowers, cosmos, and dahlias

• WEED WACKING SALT & VINEGAR - No need to worry about weeds wasting space taking over your garden with this natural, yet potent concoction. Combine 1 gallon white vinegar with 1 cup salt. Add 1 tablespoon liquid dishwashing soap into the solution so the solution will stick to the leaves of the weeds. This is a powerfully natural weed killer, so don’t spray too close to any plants you’re protecting.

Whatever you decide to grow this fall/ autumn, remember that all your hard work of composting, mulching, weeding, watering, fertilizing, pruning, and deadheading will contribute to a most glorious garden. You may not be able to control every aspect of your plants’ growth but, God willing, combined with your green thumb efforts, you’ll reap quite a harvest of edibles in due time.

• TOMATO LEAF APHID AND MITE REPELLANT SPRAY - Soak 2 cups tomato leaves in 2 cups of water overnight. In the morning strain and remove leaves, add 2 more cups of water and pour into a spray bottle.

Plus, you’ll benefit in bountiful ways from being out in the fresh air in nature as you garden, burn calories (you burn about 150 calories gardening for about 30-45 minutes), and grow organic, nutrient-rich homegrown produce for healthier living for you and your loved ones!

Be on the lookout and guard against flea beetles, slugs, Harlequin bugs, stink bugs, potato beetles, cucumber beetles, squash bugs, and aphids.

Ready for a break from grocery store food?

There’s nothing quite like enjoying the harvest of fresh edibles (veggies, fruits and herbs) from your own garden. Green thumb or not, you can grow a thriving garden that will make nutritious and delicious meals for you and your loved ones.

Try to plan your planting of vegetables at least 55-85 days before a potential first frost, though root vegetables are likely to be more resilient through the cold weather. Root vegetables seem to be best through direct seeding, while others you can grow from table scraps that are transplanted.

Consider composting with organic matter such as tea leaves that contain mineralrich macronutrients and micronutrients that boost your plant’s growth. Some key benefits composting with tea can offer your plants include deterring plant diseases and increasing nutrient turnover.

Plants aren’t the only ones growing.

Because fall temperatures start out warmer, the populations of pests are also rapidly multiplying. It’s best to be equipped to tackle impending insects with preventative measures as early as possible while your plants are still young and tender.

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POPULAR GARDEN CHOICES FOR YOUR NC FALL/AUTUMN GARDEN:

• BREWSKI BUGABOOS BE GONE - Sink a tuna can or small disposable pie plate about an inch below the ground. Add beer to just below the top of the container. Slugs will head to happy hour, get drunk on the beer, and drown. Not the happiest ending for the slugs, but this trick will save your plants.

• STOP MAMMALS FROM MESSIN’ RED PEPPER SPRAY - Mix 4 tablespoons hot sauce with 1 quart water and 1 teaspoon dish soap in a spray bottle. Shake well and spray to deter deer, bunnies, mice, squirrels, and birds from chowing down on your crops.

• AIN’T NO MORE ANTS AROUND SPICES - Sprinkle ground cinnamon and cayenne pepper on and around plants to ward off ants.

Organic Insecticide & Pest Repellent Recipes from: https://home.howstuffworks.com/greenliving/homemade-organic-gardening-sprays

Happy Fall/Autumn & Happy Gardening!

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*Disclaimer: event details are subject to change.

Please check event websites & social media pages for updates as the dates draw near.*

SEPTEMBER 29-OCTOBER 1 THE FRIENDS OF LEWISVILLE PUBLIC LIBRARY’S ANNUAL FALL USED BOOK SALE 4-7pm (29th); 9am-5pm (30th); 10am3pm (1st), Lewisville Public Library, 6490 Shallowford Road in Lewisville. There will be many categories including paperback/ hardback, fiction, non-fiction, adult/teens/ children...and many, many more. All proceeds go to support the Lewisville Branch Library in many wonderful ways – providing new books, audiobooks, DVDs, library supplies and many other much-needed items. Parking is free, and the library is handicapped accessible.

Saturday is “Buy a Bag of Books for Only $5.”

SEPTEMBER 30-OCTOBER 9 CAROLINA CLASSIC FAIR Ridin’, Rockin’, Livestockin’. Buy tickets early, and save! For more information, visit carolinaclassicfair.com.

OCTOBER 1 BOOBAPALOOZA BENEFITTING PRETTY IN PINK FOUNDATION 12-8pm, Incendiary Brewing Company, 486 North Patterson Avenue #105 in W-S. Winston-Salem. What better way to kick off Breast Cancer Awareness Month than a big celebration that gives back! Join us for beer, food, music, vendors and more! Incendiary Brewing Company is teaming up with Longleaf Provisions Company and Revival Junkies to host this one-of-a-kind event that the whole family can enjoy! For more details, make sure to follow their Facebook event page!

OCTOBER 5 FOOD DAY AT THE CAROLINA CLASSIC FAIR 11am-9:30pm. Get free admission to the Carolina Classic Fair for food day at the fair on Wednesday. Food day at the fair benefits Crisis Control Ministry’s food pantries. Bring five nonperishable items per person in your party to get free admission to the fair. Crisis Control Ministry will have volunteers standing by at every public entrance of the fair to accept your donations. This is a great way to save some money while having fun at the Carolina Classic Fair. This year’s food day at the fair is presented by Pinnacle Financial Partners.

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OCTOBER 7-8 CLEMMONS UNITED METHODIST CHURCH FALL BAZAAR 8am-6pm (7th); 8am-1pm (8th), Clemmons United Methodist Church, 3700 Clemmons Road. Bargains on gently used children’s clothing and toys, books, puzzles, furniture, electronics, household and holiday items, women’s clothing, accessories and boutique, men’s clothing and sporting goods. clemmonsumc.org/ bazaar

OCTOBER 8-9 & 15-16 2022 TRIAD FALL PARADE OF HOMES 1-5pm. Free event for the public! Visit paradeofhomesws.com for information.

OCTOBER 7-17 TRUNK SHOW - MOTHER OF AND SPECIAL OCCASION Nitsa’s Apparel. Join us at Nitsa’s Apparel in W-S for the Alexander by Daymor Trunk Show. We will have gowns suitable for mother of or special occasions. Daymor has broad color options and inventory available for immediate delivery on many of their gowns. As always, Nitsa’s provides signature personal service and exceptional in-house alterations. Please call to schedule your appointment.

Fabulous since 1964!

OCTOBER 8 TODDLER TREK Minglewood Farm and Nature Preserve, 238 Minglewood Road in Westfield. Are you ready to take your toddler on an outdoor adventure?

Join us for Toddler Treks where we will read a story, smell fresh herbs from the garden, investigate specimens up close from the natural world and explore the great outdoors. This program is donation-based. Visit our website to learn more about our mission and upcoming opportunities (minglewoodpreserve.org). Please register all participants attending (adults and children).

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OCTOBER 11 GIRLS’ NIGHT OUT 5pm-until…Est! Est!! Est!!! 633 North Liberty Street in W-S. Grab a friend, a neighbor, your sister, your mother, a co-worker and have a much-needed Girls’ Night Out! Enjoy $10 cocktails as well as appetizer, dinner and dessert specials. As always, each attendee receives four tickets for the fabulous prize board drawings! Reservations highly recommended.

OCTOBER 13 KIDS’ MORNING OUT 10-11:30am, Rise Indoor Sports, 419 Twins Way in Bermuda Run. Come see all Rise Indoor Sports has to offer with a variety of individual activity stations featuring all the sports kids love!

Soccer, basketball, volleyball…we’ll be doing all things active and fun! And as always, each adult also receives four tickets for the fabulous prize board drawings.

LEWISVILLE LASER’S BIG EVENT 11am-6:30pm, Lewisvile Laser and Aesthetics. It’s our birthday, but you get the presents. Please join us for our 14th annual BIG event. Take advantage of our best deals of the year, meet all of our providers and staff and enjoy great food and drinks! Learn more about the latest in aesthetic procedures and products from industry experts that will be on site all day long. Plus, enter to win one of our legendary prize packages – this year we are giving away over $12,000 in products and services. So, mark your calendars now, and we can’t wait to see you!

OCTOBER 15 SHREDDING EVENT SPONSORED BY BERMUDA RUN GARDEN CLUB 9am-12pm, 120 Kinderton Boulevard in Bermuda Run. $5 per bag or equivalent size box. Cash only. Rain or shine. Proceeds go to various Davie County community programs supported by the Garden Club.

YOUNG NATURALISTS ALL-DAY CAMP (AGES 6-12) 10am-4pm, Minglewood Farm and Nature Preserve, 238 Minglewood Road in Westfield.

Our Young Naturalists Camp is budgetfriendly and fun! Only $55 for a full-day of fun exploring the farm, forest, creek and more!

We can’t wait to see you out on the farm! minglewoodpreserve.org/camps

OCTOBER 16 CAROLINA VINTAGE MINI COMIC CON Village inn Event Center, 5402 Ramada Drive.

Vintage comic books, artists, food trucks.

Comic book will be given away as a drawing every hour. Cost: $4/person over the age of 12.

OCTOBER 21

OCTOBER 22-23

TRIAD GALA FOR LIFE

SHREK THE MUSICAL, JR.

Benefitting The Pregnancy Network.

Empowering women to face their unplanned pregnancies without fear. With Keynote Speaker Christina Bennett. Visit thepregnancynetwork.org/triadgala for more information.

The Andy Griffith Playhouse, 218 Rockford Street. Join us for a Surry Arts Players Community Theatre performance of Shrek the Musical, Jr. at The Andy Griffith Playhouse. Reserved seat tickets are $20 for adults and $15 for youth 12 and under. Based on the DreamWorks Animation Motion Picture and the book

by William Steig. surryarts.org

OCTOBER 22 FALL HIKE WITH DR. KEN BRIDLE & NATIVE PLANT SALE Minglewood Farm and Nature Preserve, 238 Minglewood Road in Westfield. Join us for a beautiful fall hike with Dr. Ken Bridle and shop our native plant sale! Discover the great biodiversity of Minglewood’s forests. The foothills of North Carolina are the perfect place to enjoy a fall hike. The cooler temperatures and beautiful fall foliage create a picturesque backdrop for an outdoor adventure. In celebration of World Planting Day, we will have native plants for sale! Don’t forget to check-out our awesome Minglewood t-shirts, too! Find the event on Eventbrite!

OCTOBER 30 TRUCK & TREAT BOOSTED 2022 1-5pm, Kaleideum North. Join us for a SPOOKTACULAR good time! Trick-ortreat in Kaleideum North’s Outdoor Science and Environmental Park and have some some BOOsted fun! We’ll have weird science, a balloon artist, specialty vehicles, food trucks, live entertainment and other spooktacular activities to experience! Save money by purchasing online before the event. Cost: Adults: $5-$7/adults and children two and older.

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Conversations with Your BFF In a recent conversation with a friend, we discussed things that bring us comfort as adults.

The smell of fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies, newly cut grass, a summer rain, and then she said, ‘Do you sleep with a stuffed animal or a baby blanket? Don’t tell anyone, but I have a stuffed animal I’ve had since high school that I sleep with every night. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t sleep with a stuffed animal.’ The conversation got real when I admitted that yes, I do sleep with a baby blanket. So, are my friend and I weird and in need of therapy with our stuffed animal and blanket in tow every night?

I am so glad you asked!

WE’RE IN GOOD COMPANY In a 2017 survey, out of 2,000 plus adults, 40% of American adults admit to sleeping with a stuffed animal or baby blanket. Reading this statistic, I quickly canceled my appointment with my psychiatrist. Since it isn’t that odd of a habit, what purpose do these familiar items play in our adult lives?

Upon a bit of research, I found that mental health professionals call items like a favorite teddy bear or blanket, ‘transitional objects,’ because they help children make the emotional transition from dependence to independence. Not sure what that says about me and my friend…we may still need therapy. For me, personally, as a little girl, I slept with a blankie every night and it traveled with me every day. Both of my parents worked and my mom would take me to my grandparents’ house every morning at 7am. She would place my blankie over her shoulder and pick me up, carrying me inside, gently placing me on the couch. The blanket smelled like my mom and I now know I missed her so much that the blankie gave me comfort while she was at work. My blankie helped me to feel close to her.

I also remember times when I was scared during a thunderstorm or in need of a nap, the blanket would soothe me. But that was as a child, what about as an adult?

DON’T BE EMBARRASSED While many adults grow past needing items of comfort, there are times in life, during extreme stress or emotional despair, that it is considered quite normal for an adult to have a childhood source of self-soothing like a stuffed animal or blanket. If you’ve come to this point in my column and you are thinking, ‘Girl, you need some help with your coping mechanisms,’ it’s healthier finding comfort in a blanket than in alcohol or drugs…at least that is what experts say. But there are times when your emotional support item may need to be retired.

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‘Is It OK to Sleep with a Stuffed Animal or Baby Blanket as an Adult?’

BY REBECCA COOPER

IF IT BECOMES A RELATIONSHIP ISSUE It kind of goes without saying, but I’ll say it anyway, ‘If you’re looking to your baby blanket for support instead of your partner, you might have an issue.’

If you are finding comfort in an object rather than in your partner, that is a symptom of a larger intimacy issue.

YOU CAN’T SLEEP WITHOUT IT If you actually believe that you can’t fall asleep without your teddy bear or blankie, you may have a problem. Basically, if you are overly reliant on the object as an adult, the item is counterproductive to why you latched onto it as a child. An example is your teddy bear was to help you with your coping and autonomy as a child, but if you can’t sleep or rest without it as an adult, it may have too much importance.

BREAKING UP WITH TEDDY If you decide you need to break up with your teddy or blankie, the good news is we all are able to fall asleep naturally, you just may need to retrain yourself. Try sleeping on your own without your comfort item once in a while to prove you can do it, perhaps weaning yourself away from it all together. When it comes to me and my friend, we aren’t quitters, so we’ll continue to snuggle with our teddy and blankie…you do you and I’ll do me!

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321 WEST FOURTH STREET | WINSTON SALEM | 336.448.1714 | TUESDAY-THURSDAY 4pm-9pm | FRIDAY - SATURDAY 4pm-10pm | SUNDAY 4pm-9pm

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336-448-5188 | HOURS: Monday Closed | Tuesday - Sunday 8am - 3pm

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