Compassionate Conflict

Compassionate Conflict BY LESLIE SPEAS

Have you noticed that there are a lot of dissenting opinions in the world today? There are so many areas where we think differently – vaccines, government, abortion to name a few. And many people are very passionate and vocal about their positions. And guess what? This can result in conflict. But all is not lost. When managed biblically and compassionately, conflict can help us to maintain and grow our relationships.

BELOW ARE SOME GUIDELINES FOR COMPASSIONATE CONFLICT MANAGEMENT.

Before you respond to the situation:

Take a break, think it through, and pray about your response. Doing this may prevent crucial mistakes which can negatively impact the relationship. Proverbs has some good advice that encourages us to take a pause – “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control” (Proverbs 29:11).

Think about whether it is worth your time and effort to address the situation. Then, reflect on your own attitudes, strengths, and weaknesses and whether you may have contributed to the situation. It’s hard to believe but sometimes the problem may be more about us than the other person.

If you are moving forward with addressing the conflict situation:

Press forward slowly, with forethought and self-control. Jesus provides us with direction for approaching someone in a conflict situation. Matthew 18:15 says, “If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you won your brother over.” I believe this is an encouragement to go to the other person and speak with them alone – without sharing with others, without gossiping about it, and without trying to recruit others to your side. This will provide a much better chance of restoring the relationship. BELOW ARE SOME ADDITIONAL GUIDELINES TO USE:

Plan a time

to discuss when you are both well-rested and in a good state of mind to be objective and show compassion to the other party.

Clearly define the issue and keep the discussion focused on it.

I used to be really good at dredging up all kinds of things from the past (and may still do this on occasion). It’s best to stay focused and not rehash past issues or hurts.

Affirm the relationship.

For example, “Our relationship is important to me, so I wanted to discuss something that has been on my mind with you. I feel hurt when you cancel the plans we have made at the last minute.”

Show compassion and kindness.

Once you share your feelings, lean in and listen actively to the other person’s perspective. Make sure that your body language, tone of voice, and other actions convey that you are open to their viewpoint. No eye-rolling, shrugging, or sighing allowed – even if you want to! Summarize and reflect back to the individual what you believe you have heard.

Propose a solution.

When working toward a solution, consider Philippians 2:4-5: “Each of you should look not to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.” Strive for solutions that keep everyone’s best interests in mind.

What if the other person isn’t receptive to your efforts and/or willing to resolve the conflict? Then, as hard as it may be, forgive just as God in Christ has forgiven you. “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God” (Matthew 5:9).

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to Enable Getting Your Hold on Happiness Hope, Healing and Empowerment

BY SUSAN BB SCHABACKER

It’s not always rainbows and butterflies, but sometimes when life gives us lemons we need to remember how refreshing lemons can be. The more you feel empowered to move your mindset and shift your perspective to the healthy and positive, the better off you’ll feel and be.

Embracing the power of positivity can benefit your life and livelihood in many ways. Seeing the world through rose colored glasses can help you focus on the good and what to be grateful for.

Make a short “happy” list and keep it handy, whether on your phone (in your notes, doc, or pic) or printed out. Think: “In sight, in mind.” The more you review your list, which can vary from time to time and can always be adapted, the more you’ll be able to focus on your happiness. And, your happiness has a ripple effect on the people, animals, and even plants around you.

Also, the happier you are, the more you’ll be able to tap into achieving your greatest potential. If all you see are rain clouds and neglect to see the rainbow created by the sun shining through the storm, you’ll be missing out on the magical beauty of the hope you have to hold onto.

It also helps to be around people who bring you up, not down.

How depressed and dismal would Eeyore feel if he weren’t around his friends, Pooh, Piglet, and Roo to lift his spirits, comfort and encourage him. He may have had a constant rain cloud hanging over him, looking through a lens of only shades of gray, but just being around them brought much needed rays of sunshine and color to his otherwise colorless world.

Rid yourself of shame or judgment about feeling down in the dumps and remember you’re not alone. You’re never alone. Whether it’s once-in-ablue-moon blues or serious, chronic depression that ails you, there are many who can relate.

You’re not without help or support. Be honest with yourself and others about your true feelings to help get the help you need. Seek to better understand your current status - how you feel and why you might feel this way. Reflect on past situations so you have a greater perspective and scope of reference. Maybe what’s bogging you down is something you’ve carried with you all the way from childhood or even babyhood, unwanted heavy baggage you’ve never truly let go of that continues to weigh you down. Once you delve deep into memories, you’ve already taken steps in the right direction.

Hard work and ample time may be needed to uncover, understand, heal, and move forward from sometimes painful and even traumatic memories, but in doing so, you’re enabling and empowering yourself to overcome and thrive, not just survive. It’s not always an easy task, so be patient with yourself, your supporters, and the process. Set your worries and fears aside, ask for help as needed, and feel reassured you will make it through as a stronger, wiser person and ultimately better off.

We are each uniquely created so tap into your own innate loves, likes, wants, and desires as you take to heart some of the following tips and hacks for happiness:

• Get and give hugs (air hugs are also an option) • Get fit and have fun with a dance party movin’ and groovin’ to your fav music • Pamper party and spa day/night • Meal and a movie • Gather garden edibles and bouquets (meadow flowers are a happy option) to give and display in a vase • Substitute yummy, healthier foods and beverages • Get artsy and craftsy with decoratables and wearables (which make great handcrafted gifts) • Tea party with a theme (e.g. Alice in

Wonderland/Japanese geishas and samurais/British afternoon) • Nature walk, fishing and camping trip • Beach bound to soak up sun (while wearing sunscreen), dig toes into (and exfoliate with) sand, collect seashells (for DIY arts and crafts), and surf (whether you wade or dive in; surf’s up, dudette!)

Good news: There are excellent and plentiful resources in your community, online, and worldwide to assist you and help you recover, get happier, and live a healthier, better life.

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THE WRONG LADDER?

REEVALUATING YOUR CAREER PATH AT ANY STAGE.

BY TARYN JEREZ

I love asking my nieces and nephews, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I get responses that include everything from art teacher to astronaut! It’s amazing hearing the excitement and creativity behind every answer but my favorite part is re-asking that same question every year or so because their answers change so frequently.

When we are growing up the world seems so full of possibility and when we think about our future career, there is that hunger and excitement to find something that we truly love!

What answer would you have given as a five year old? What about at age twelve or sixteen? How about right now? Chances are your answer evolved over time, just like you did as a person.

The truth is that as we grow in our careers, we build on our wisdom, confidence and perspective and those things can fundamentally change us. We are meant to evolve our entire lives, not just as children. So why is it that, as adults, it’s so common to feel stuck in one career path? Especially when something else may be calling our name?

When was the last time you asked yourself, “Am I climbing the wrong ladder?”

Here’s what this might sound like: • Does the trajectory I’m on support the career I really want? • Does the career I have support the life I want? • Does the answer to these questions sit well with me? If you answered “no” to one of more of these questions it may be a sign that you’re climbing the wrong ladder! Do you really want to move up in your current career path or move to something new entirely? It’s easy to get up and go to work every day without taking inventory of your needs and how your career plays into them, but it makes a world of difference when you do. Your answers matter!

If you are faced with the reality that it may be time for a change but you aren’t exactly sure what to do next here are a few questions to think on: • What are you really good at/what do you enjoy doing? • What are you genuinely looking for in a career? • What lifestyle do you want your career to support?

All of these are important but especially the last one because too often it’s overlooked. If your current career doesn’t allow you the schedule, flexibility, purpose or income you want, take those things into consideration as you begin looking for your new ladder.

Is changing career paths scary? Absolutely, but remember that Lewis Carroll once said, “In the end we only regret the chances we didn’t take.” Risk taking is a skill that you have to push yourself into sometimes to learn and get better. Maybe that journey of hopping from your current ladder onto the next one feels frightening, but think about how much more frightening it is to look back and realize you didn’t take the risk that could have paid off in the end.

When you challenge yourself to answer questions honestly about your current career and your feelings around it, you may discover something you didn’t know you were after. Don’t keep climbing the current ladder you’re on just to wind up on top of the wrong building! Bet on yourself and take that first step towards a new path.

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Despite Daily Distractions

BY SUSAN BB SCHABACKER

Even those without ADHD can have their attention overstimulated and challenged by all sorts of daily distractions. Our brains and mind-body-spirit connection have more power over our lives than we sometimes realize.

Here are some tools, tips and techniques to try to help you keep your calm, maintain your concentration, and stay focused on your busy life. The more you exercise and practice this, like a muscle, the stronger you’ll be at not letting those daily ubiquitous distractions deter you from who and what you want to be focusing on or the task at hand.

How effectively can a building be constructed without a blueprint or a business without a business plan? Integrate your plan and planning into your daily routines, review your goals and remind yourself of your mission and vision. Stay better on course by charting your course along the way. It may take some reassessing and refocusing, so do a much needed “refresh” like you would your browser after it times out.

Take 5, 10, or 15 with some R & R and deep breathing. As hard as we may work and as productive as we may want to be, we have to remember we’re humans, not robots. Even if you’re like the Energizer Bunny, we all need to recharge our batteries to keep going. Sometimes it’s important to take a break, have a change of scenery, and physically and mentally step away from the task at hand before coming back to it. If you’re having a difficult time just getting back into the mental state of continuing to work on a project, set the worries aside. They can easily become blockages that obstruct your path from proceeding.

Instead, focus your mind and energy around the positive aspects that you want to achieve and the feelings you have in the process of achieving them. It should feel good and rewarding. Be your own cheerleader and encourage yourself. You’re further along than you were just mere seconds ago and you’re making progress, no matter how slowly it may seem.

Before you get too thoroughly invested in something or someone, consider the pros versus cons. Worth your time, money, and energy? Do the pros outweigh the cons?

And consider risks versus rewards. There may be risks involved, but some are worth taking and the more you concentrate on the rewards and positive reinforcement, generally the better outcome you’ll have.

Treat yourself to something healthy (and yummy to your tummy) when you’ve accomplished something. Baby steps can add up into gigantic strides and eventually cover miles and miles of ground. Also, chart and document your progress along the way. Snap a few behind the scenes pics and share via social media or just to review later and reflect on.

Once you’ve prioritized what and who to focus on, such as the top 3 items, factoring in time sensitivity/urgency/deadlines and meaningfulness/importance, congratulate yourself. You’ve already accomplished a lot more than you think by figuring and plotting out your direction.

Clear the clutter and create a cleaner environment. A tidier, more controlled (and more breathable - plants are always welcome) work and living space will help you re-center and refocus.

Energy work (like qigong and reiki) and essential oils can soothe your senses and improve your mental clarity. Clearing your energy and removing blockages can make a world of difference in the way you feel and think. Your mind, body, and spirit will be more aligned and you’ll be able to improve your concentration.

Simply breathing in a few whiffs of pure essential oils can have health benefits and help you concentrate while boosting your cognition. Maximize your aromatherapy experience with a massage (even a 5 minute DIY massage) with essential oils added to carrier oils like fractionated coconut oil, olive oil, avocado oil, apricot kernel oil, and jojoba oil. Utilize reflexology by massaging hands, feet, ears, scalp, neck, shoulders, or full body.

For energizing and awakening effects, try eucalyptus, rosemary, mints (peppermint and spearmint) and citrus (lemon and orange). For relaxing and calming effects, try lavender, chamomile, ylang ylang, and jasmine. For grounding and centering effects, try cedarwood, sage, patchouli, and sandalwood.

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Eight Great Movies Inspired by Favorite Southern Books

BY KAREN COOPER

The next time you’re looking for a great movie to watch, consider one of your favorite southern-themed books for inspiration. What’s more entertaining than watching movies based on the characters we already know and love? Here are some you might want to watch for the first time or watch for the 10th time!

COLD MOUNTAIN (2003)

Based on the National Book award-winning novel by Charles Frazier, this movie is set in North Carolina during the Civil War. It stars Jude Law, Nicole Kidman, and Renee Zellweger. A wounded Confederate soldier deserts his unit and travels a long way to get back to a woman he barely knows, but with whom he shared a brief but significant bond. Back at home, his beloved struggles to keep her home and herself together with the help of some good friends.

THE COLOR PURPLE (1985)

Alice Walker’s 1982 book won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction and the National Book Award. Soon after, it was adapted into a film starring Whoopi Goldberg, Oprah Winfrey, and Danny Glover, and directed by Steven Spielberg. Celie, an African American woman living in the South in the early 1900s survives horrific abuse and prejudices of the time. She is married off to the worst kind of man, “Mister” and is left to find companionship where she can. She has a sister she truly loves and through sheer will and determination she continues to persevere and finds a way to live in the world on her terms.

FRIED GREEN TOMATOES (1991)

Based on the book Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe by Fannie Flagg, this film, which is set in Alabama in the 1920s stars Kathy Bates, Jessica Tandy, Mary Stuart Masterson, Cicely Tyson, and Mary-Louise Parker. A frustrated housewife visiting a nursing home, meets a fascinating old woman who shares captivating tales from her past. As the old woman continues to tell her stories, the two become good friends and the housewife gains the courage to change her own life for the better.

THE SECRET LIFE OF BEES (2008)

The Secret Life of Bees brings to life Sue Monk Kidd’s popular novel. It’s set in South Carolina in the 1960s and stars Queen Latifah, Paul Bettany, Jennifer Hudson, and Dakota Fanning. Preoccupied by memories of her dead mother and abused by her father, 14-year-old Lily runs away with her friend and caregiver to the South Carolina town that may hold the key to her mother’s past. While there, Lily meets three sisters who take her under their wing and teach her about beekeeping, honey, and the Black Madonna. MY DOG SKIP (2000)

Based on the memoir by Willie Morris, and starring Frankie Muniz, Diane Lane, Luke Wilson and Kevin Bacon, this movie follows a shy boy growing up in 1940s Mississippi. He starts to open up to the world with the help of a mischievous family dog named, Skip. My Dog Skip is a feelgood movie about a boy and his dog in a small, sleepy Southern town that teaches us about family, friendship, love, devotion, trust, and bravery.

THE HELP (2009)

The Help is based on a historical fiction novel by American author Kathryn Stockett. The movie stars Emma Stone, Viola Davis, and Octavia Spencer in a tale of the relationships between white Southerners and their African American maids. Unforgettable characters lead the viewer on a journey through their experiences with the best and worst of Mississippi (and the South in general) in the 1960s.

THE PRINCE OF TIDES (1991)

Based on the book of the same name by Pat Conroy, this drama starring Barbara Streisand and Nick Nolte is set in New York and South Carolina. A New York psychiatrist whose patient is an emotionally troubled woman asks to discuss her South Carolina family’s troubled past with the woman’s twin brother. The brother and the psychiatrist become close allies as he tells the story of the twins’ fraught South Carolina upbringing.

TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD (1962)

Harper Lee’s 1960 novel won the Pulitzer Prize and was adapted into a popular movie starring Gregory Peck, Mary Badham, Estelle Evans, and Robert Duvall. In small-town Alabama, Scout Finch and her older brother Jem spend much of their time with their friend Dill, spying on their mysterious neighbor, Boo Radley. When their widowed father, a respected lawyer, defends a black man against fabricated rape charges, the trial and related events subject the children to the evils of racism and stereotyping.

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There are few words as “loaded” as forgiveness. We hear it, we nod in recognition, and think: Why is it so hard? Or I know I should forgive, but…

The Mayo Clinic provides this insight: “Being hurt by someone, particularly someone you love and trust, can cause anger, sadness and confusion. If you dwell on hurtful events or situations, grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility can take root.”

You have probably been there. I have. We pay a big price when we hold on to these powerful emotions: • Bringing anger and bitterness into our relationships and experiences • Becoming absorbed in how we were wronged, preventing us from enjoying the present • Becoming depressed or anxious • Feeling that our life lacks meaning or purpose, or battling with our beliefs and values • Becoming distant from others

No one wants to live from that place. Forgiveness is the key to moving forward because it is the release of resentment and anger.

We want that, but we may hold back forgiveness because we mistakenly believe that to forgive means: • to forget, as if it didn’t happen • that whatever caused the pain was no big deal • simply picking up where you left off in the relationship Forgiveness is none of that, because: it did happen, it was a big deal to you, and you can’t just go back to “before.” This is precisely why some say that forgiveness is mainly for you. Yes, it usually makes the other person feel better, less burdened, less guilty. But you don’t control how much of that actually happens. So, here’s the thing - forgiveness allows you to get on with your life. It creates a kind of peace that research tells us can contribute to: • Healthier relationships • Improved mental health • Less anxiety, stress and hostility • Lower blood pressure • Fewer symptoms of depression • A stronger immune system • Improved heart health • Improved self-esteem

AUTHENTIC FORGIVENESS IS KEY

We know from past experience that saying “I forgive you” or “It’s fine” will not bring about a release of resentment or anger. Authentic forgiveness is grounded in a genuine willingness to let it go. I’ve looked at several models for practicing forgiveness and found the one offered by Dr. Everett Worthington particularly realistic and approachable. It includes these key steps:

RECALL THE HURT

Face the fact that you’ve been hurt. Don’t be nasty and hurtful, and don’t treat yourself like a victim, or the other person unkindly. Truly decide that you will forgive without retribution. Remember that she is a valuable person and so are you. Pretend that the other person is sitting in an empty chair across from you. Talk to them from your heart. Then, when you’ve gotten it all out, sit in their chair. Talk back to the imaginary you in a way that helps you see why the other person might have wronged you. Perhaps you feel empathy for them, or maybe gain an understanding of their actions. You may be reminded that people sometimes lash out from their own hurts or disappointments, or that you were the trigger for their “hot button” issue.

ALTRUISTIC GIFT

Extend your forgiveness as an unselfish, altruistic gift. You remember how you felt when someone forgave you, right? You were released from a particular type of misery and felt freed. In other words, forgive unselfishly.

COMMIT

Seal your forgiveness by writing a note to yourself – on a post-it or in your phone. It could be a few words such as “I have forgiven Lexi.” This simple act helps bring closure.

HOLD ONTO FORGIVENESS

Remind yourself that you have released your hurt, anger, and resentment. We humans have a way of forgetting this. So, as often as you need to, go back and look at that note you wrote to yourself.

If forgiveness is a challenge right now, explore this and other models more deeply or, consider reaching out to a trusted friend, counselor, or therapist. Why? Because forgiveness is essential to a well-lived life.

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The Early Church BY ANGELIA CORNATZER

The Fellowship of the Believers, Acts: 2:42-47

“And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.”

This is one of my favorite passages of scripture because we see so much beauty and power in the way these believers lived loving God and each other. Let’s look at the way they lived and it will be an encouragement and refocusing for our lives with God and others.

This group of early believers had just seen the most extraordinary and powerful events in the days before, including 3,000 people becoming Christians. They continued in their faith by dedicating themselves to continuing and deepening their knowledge.

How can you dedicate yourself to obtaining a deeper knowledge of God this week?

They were absolutely not alone. Their lifestyle was one defined by sharing. They shared ups, downs, meals, responsibilities, and they shared a deep love for God. They were devoted to living in likeminded community.

How can you share your life with someone this week?

Breaking bread and prayer was a way that they remembered Jesus’ sacrifice together. They made it a point to be aware of what God had done for them. They devoted themselves to honoring and praising God in this way.

How can you choose to honor and praise God this week?

They did not feel apathetic towards the Lord, but they were in awe of Him. Their souls took a posture of worship and reverence as they lived this way. Take time to reflect and journal on all that God has done for you.

Seeing evidence of God’s power and goodness all around them through signs and wonders was a part of life because they were devoting life to God. They were ready and pure vessels, so God was working through and amongst them.

Pray that God would use you for His will and works.

They continued a life of sharing and togetherness. They practiced selflessness and serving for the sake of those in need. The things they owned did not matter as much as loving those in need as Jesus would.

What can you give to those in need this week?

It was part of their every day to attend the temple together and share a meal together. Their hearts were open to God and each other. Their homes were a place of fellowship and community. It was a daily rhythm of life to worship and dine together. Their hearts were not selfish and rushed or unsatisfied and striving, but glad and generous. Even simply at a meal time, there was evidence of their hearts being delighted and selfless.

How is your heart? Pray God would strengthen your heart to be glad and generous this week.

Praising God was just what they did. Blessing and honoring the Lord was a habit and routine they carried through each moment of their day. They did not have hostility with people, they enjoyed favor together. Their eyes and hearts were fixed on the right thing: giving God praise.

Spend time reflecting and praising God for who He is.

They were obedient and faithful to God, and God brought fruit. They simply lived in awe of God and selflessly loved each other, and God was the one who added to their number.

Down with the DRAMA

BY LESLIE SPEAS

Are you tired of dealing with drama? Do you have anyone in your life that you would classify as a drama queen? As I have gotten older, I have less tolerance for drama. I just want to be around peaceful people, do positive things, and enjoy life.

So, what is a drama queen? This is a woman who makes every issue and problem about her. Drama usually surrounds her and, if it isn’t already there, she will create it. And keep in mind that there are plenty of drama kings out there as well!

Here are some behaviors that are common with drama queens and kings - they tend to: • Keep tabs on everyone just in case material is needed to create drama • Make a big deal out of little things • Stir things up by gossiping and manipulating to cause trouble and arguments with others • Never see themselves as part of the problem – there is always someone or something else to blame • Never be satisfied unless they get their way • Demand compassion but extend none • Dramatically share the highs and lows of their lives and expect others to ooh and aah over the things they share • Like being the center of attention and thrive on the chaos they create

So, what can you do to deal with the drama they create? If the drama queen is a friend or acquaintance, you may be able to distance yourself. However, if it’s a coworker or family member, it may be a little more difficult. Below are five strategies that you can consider employing to decrease the drama!

SEE THE HUMAN BEHIND THE DIFFICULT BEHAVIOR

I don’t think that most people are difficult just for the sake of being difficult. There is usually some underlying reason that is motivating them to act this way. They may create drama as a result of their own pain. Looking at it from this perspective may help you to be more understanding and tolerant of these behaviors. TREAT THEM WITH RESPECT, EMPATHY, AND KINDNESS

Many people operate under a constant feeling of not being appreciated or respected. This could be due to previous life or work experience. Showing them empathy by saying things like, “I imagine it’s difficult to be in your situation” can help the person to feel understood and valued.

EXAMINE YOURSELF

Drama queens aren’t generally very self-aware. In fact, you may hear them say, “I don’t do drama.” So, who knows? You might be one! We are all probably somebody else’s difficult person at some point in time. Sometimes the reason people rub us the wrong way can be found by simply taking a good look at ourselves. Some people may remind us of past hurts, which can dredge up past pain. If we stop and ask ourselves why we are reacting in that way, the answer may be in your past. In doing so, we may gain some insight about ourselves that will help in the future.

SET BOUNDARIES AND STANDARDS AROUND WHAT YOU WILL TOLERATE

If you don’t have the time or patience to deal with drama, give the other person some feedback about how their behavior is making you feel (see last month’s article on High Impact Feedback). If you show empathy and compassion initially and the drama continues, you may have to end the interaction kindly and set some boundaries around your time in the future.

DON’T ENABLE THEM

If they come with you to share a problem or complaint, redirect them and encourage them to stick to the facts (which they generally don’t do). Further, put the problem or issue back on them and ask what they plan to do about it. If you do this a few times, they may stop interacting with you as often.

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Why Getting Organized Now Will Determine Your Holiday Sales

This column is meant to serve as a resource for readers who seek inspiration and knowledge for building their own small business brands. Through actionable advice, find the encouragement to help you keep living your life with hustle and heart.

If you are anything like me, you’re looking at the calendar and can’t believe it’s already October! The truth is, from here on out 2022 is full speed ahead and that means the winter holidays will be here before we know it!

For most small businesses the largest sales season is right around the corner which makes this month the perfect time to start establishing your holiday sales plan! From narrowing down your offers to deciding on promotions and planning your marketing efforts, keep reading to learn how to organize it all and set yourself up for your best holiday sales!

FINALIZE YOUR HOLIDAY & END-OF-YEAR OFFERS

Think about what your current offers are and which ones you want to concentrate on promoting during the last quarter of the year. Consider which offers are most likely to take a back seat to customers’ needs during this time of year versus those that will be even more sought after. Are there new products or services you want to introduce or bring back for the holidays? How about any giftable offers that could do well with your audience as they are shopping for loved ones? The way we look at what we sell should evolve throughout the seasons because customer spending habits and priorities absolutely do. Once you have each offer that you’ll be selling finalized, make a quick list and let any team members know who will benefit from this information.

PLAN OUT YOUR PROMOTIONS

Come holiday time it can be very overwhelming to first start creating promotions which can often lead to quick decisions that end up losing you money. Allow your focus to come from creating a promotions experience for your customers rather than a random sale to encourage them to purchase. Try choosing something specific to what your customer finds valuable! Perhaps it’s about offering free gift wrap with a custom card for items from your shop or doing a free gift or donation on their behalf when they purchase a certain amount or book a specific service? For discounts you plan to offer, what could help them see added value and excitement but not take away from your bottom line? Think about things that encourage your customer to hit a specific threshold transaction amount or encourage them to buy or book more with you. GET ORDERS AND BOOKINGS IN EARLY

Now that you know what you’ll be offering, it’s time to get everything you’ll need to get your products or services into customers’ hands, both literally and figuratively. If you need any physical items, start ordering them now to avoid shipping delays. This could include supplies to make products, shipping and handling items, promotional collateral, client gifts and more! If you plan to book any specific services to help you during the holidays, begin looking into who you’ll be working with and checking their availability early on. You may need to bring on a photographer, virtual assistant, social media manager to help with holiday marketing efforts, etc. Make this a priority now so you don’t miss out. ESTABLISHING YOUR TIMELINE

This time of year, your calendar is your BFF in your business! It will help you stay on top of your marketing, shop or website updates, inventory needs, and your own personal life! Consider getting very specific with your dates and include even the smallest reminders and deadlines to help you stay on top of everything. Create your calendar in a way that is realistic for you to stick to! Start with any dates you are personally unavailable due to holiday plans to avoid overlap and overwhelm! Have things like inventory delivery, promotions going live, client gifts mailed, social media content ready, shipping cut-offs and more all with an understanding of your holiday timeline as a whole.

Hustle & Heart Challenge

This month, challenge yourself to think ahead to the upcoming holiday season and decide what your main sales goal is and how you’re going to get there! Confirm which offers you are going to be selling and what you need to do in order to get those offers into your ideal customers’ hands over the next few months!

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Patiently Rooted BY KELLI MESSICK, OWNER OF PATIENTLY ROOTED

What plants are good for my lighting?

Hi, plant friends! My name is Kelli and my goal is to help more people become plant people and see all the amazing benefits plants can bring to your life. As the founder and owner of Patiently Rooted, a company dedicated to spreading the word about the benefits of plants, I have always had a love of nature and plants, and now I want to share my obsession with other people.

PLANT LIGHTING TERMS

A common question among new or experienced plant owners is: what type of light does this plant need? Most people buy plants based on this preference so they can make sure the plant will thrive in their space. A misconception that most people have is that since they have dark lighting in their house or not enough natural light, they can’t own a house plant – which is wrong. There are plenty of plants that can survive in lower lighting and some that prefer it.

When talking about lighting there are a few terms you might hear. These include Direct, Bright Indirect, Medium, and Low light. Direct light is when the sun is directly hitting the plant’s leaves. This is usually in the window or directly in front of the window. Bright Indirect is when the plant is close to the source of light but the light might not be directly on the leaves. This is usually a couple feet from the window. Medium is in the middle of the room where the plant will still get a majority of the light coming in the room. Low light is considered the back of the room or even a corner of the room that is anywhere from 8-10 ft away from the light coming in.

You will also hear a lot of people talk about east, south and west facing windows being the best spots for plants. This is usually true, but there are a few plants that would do well in north facing windows, too. Most people prefer to put their plants near a south facing window because it gets light in it a majority of the day. If you only have windows on the east or west, don’t worry, there are lots of plants that will enjoy the hours of the sun they will get in the morning or evening. For the north facing windows or side of the house, I would stick with lower light plants to fit in the space. Plant Recommendations Based on Lighting

DIRECT LIGHT

If you have a lot of direct light or places near your window, here are some plants I recommend for that space. Succulents and cacti are obvious choices but one of my favorite choices is a Bird of Paradise. They love direct light and only need to be watered every two weeks. Some other good options are pothos and snake plants. These are both beginner plants needing very little care.

BRIGHT INDIRECT LIGHT

This is the most common light people have because they can’t get plants right next to the window. My recommendation would be a Pilea Chinese Money plant. They thrive in this lighting and only need to be watered every two weeks or when the leaves start to droop. Other great options are Fiddle Leaf Figs and Ficus Audreys.

MEDIUM LIGHT

There are a ton of plants that are perfect for medium light. Some of my favorites include prayer plants, Calatheas, and Peperomias. A rule of thumb for plants in this lighting and low light is to make sure the soil is mostly dry before you water it. Since they are not getting a lot of sun, you want to make sure you aren’t overwatering it.

LOW LIGHT

The best low light plants I can recommend are the Snake Plant and the ZZ (Zamioculcas zamiifolia). These are beautiful plants that bring any darker spot in your house some life and greenery. For these plants make sure they dry out completely between waterings, they also only like to be watered every two to three months. These are great low maintenance plants that can actually survive in any lighting situation.