Speak Up, Stand Up, Save a Life 12
OPINION
BY DR. ELLEN G. KELMAN Licensed Psychologist
W
hat does it mean to be brave? Do you have to be a soldier going into battle? Or a firefighter running into a burning building? Maybe it’s when you jump out of an airplane and hope the parachute opens. Most of us don’t describe ourselves using this word. It seems to be reserved for only those very special people who have courage or endure pain or don’t mind danger. “Wow,” you might say. “That’s not me! I avoid danger, and I’m really not a big fan of pain either!” I would certainly agree. You see, I’m a psychologist. I talk to people for a living. I don’t transplant hearts or save lost puppies. I don’t pull families from raging flood waters, and I don’t even dress up as Santa Claus once a year to delight children. I talk to people, but mostly, I listen.
WEST VALLEY VIEW NEWS | JANUARY 12, 2022
I listen to people of all ages describe their sadness, and their grief, and their disappointment. I listen to their anxiety and overwhelming fears, their heartache, and their challenges. People don’t come to see me on their best days or when life is going well. You also talk to people and are often asked to listen. With social media, text, or even in person, you might talk to hundreds of strangers, acquaintances or friends every day. You must decide whether they are having a good day or the worst ever. You differentiate between daily drama or real-life crisis. My job is easier. People expect me to ask questions like, “Are you thinking of hurting yourself or someone else?” That’s not usually how your conversations might go. But maybe that needs to change. Maybe we all need to ask more straightforward questions. For example, “Why do you sound sad?”
“Are you talking about not being here anymore?” “Why are you drawing pictures of someone getting hurt?” If something doesn’t sound right to you, take a risk, and tell someone who is able to intervene. The statistics are alarming! Recently the U.S. surgeon general issued an advisory regarding the seriousness of the mental health crisis affecting our youth today. This hasn’t happened before. In 2019, high school students reported persistent feeling of sadness and hopelessness at an increase of more than 40% since 2009. Suicidal behaviors increased from 2009 to 2019 by 36%. Completing suicide increased by 57%. Now, two years later, and living through the COVID-19 pandemic, symptoms of anxiety and depression among young people have increased dramatically. What does it mean to be brave? It’s
the willingness to no longer remain silent about your pain or someone else’s. It’s the desire to do what’s “right” instead of what’s popular or safe. If you are feeling lost, isolated, or might hurt yourself or someone else, know that you are not alone and there are people who can help. When you hear something that makes you uncomfortable or question someone’s safety, it may be honoring their wishes to stay silent, but it is also taking the easy way out. Afterall, who wants to get involved and risk being unpopular or encourage someone’s anger? What it means to be brave is having the courage to possibly save a life. Don’t leave this up to someone else. You can make a difference. To find out more about how you can help or get help, Attend the virtual conference, Speak Up, Stand Up, Save a Life on Feb. 1. Register online at speakstandsave.com.
