Universe Issue 2 - 2018

TIPSANDTRICKS

WHAT WE’VE

JOBINTERVIEW OVERHEARD ON CAMPUS HOROSCOPES+ GAMES

INSEMESTERONE HOWTOPREPARE FOR THE

TO NAIL THAT

been up to beginning

OF THE END GUILD BALL

PHOTOS

PUPPIES+ pancakes

IN THIS

issue

PUPPIES+PANCAKES10

NAILTHATINTERVIEW24

GUILD 101

GENDER AND SEXUALITY

GUILDBALL201812

President’s Update

04

Check Yourself

28

Your 2018 Execs

05

Mental Health and You

29

From the Universe Team

06

“It’s Just Recreational”

30

What is the Guild?

07

What We’ve Been up to in Sem 1

09

SPORT

Puppies and Pancakes

10

Benefits of Social Sport

Campus Culture Recap

15

New Clubs on the Block

16

19

Student Rights

Things to Expect from Uni

26

Game Changing Principles

27

PROCRASTINATION

STUDENT RIGHTS 18

PHOTOS 12

LIFESTYLE How to Prepare for the Beginning of the End

INTERNATIONAL CLUBS and societies

+QUTBALL 25

Law Library to Implement New Security Measures

32

Overheard on Campus

33

Self Expression at Uni

34

10 People You Have in Every Class

35

Irrational Uni Fears

36

An Official Ranking of QUT Wildlife

37

Horoscopes

42

Can You Not?

38

Games

43

Sharehouse Horror Stories

39

follow your social hub

GUILDNEWS,WHAT’SON,LIFESTYLE +ALITTLEBITOFPROCRASTINATION

QUTUNIVERSE

QUT_GUILD

QG_UNIVERSE W W W.QUTUNIVERSE.COM

G U I L D 101

PRESIDENT’S update Semester one has flown by and semester two is now here! It’s time for mid-year study habit resolutions, ball season and the inevitable relapse into bad study habits.

Semester one was jam packed full of events and new ideas. Starting with San Cisco headlining TOGAFEST, semester one saw everything from open air cinemas, sporting festivals, and glow parties, to free headshots, cheap fruit and veg, and puppies on campus!

As your personal uni wingman, we’ve got your back, and we’re here to make sure this semester is even more epic than the last! You may have seen us out on campus each week at our VENT TENTS. We listened to thousands of your welldeserved rants and have taken those issues straight to the university!

Two years of campaigning from the QUT Guild has finally seen STANDARDISED SUBMISSION TIMES become policy, in effect from this semester! This means there will be no more 9am or 4:59pm submission times to confuse you everything will be due at 11:59pm, the last minute of the day!

Now, we’re campaigning to see an easier and fairer class registration system and a uniform policy for assessment extensions when Blackboard goes down. If there’s something else grinding your gears about the uni - shoot me an email at president@qutguild.com and I can help you out!

That’s not all that we have planned! We know that students are struggling to find jobs, and that’s why we are super excited to be launching our Entrepreneurship and Employment Hub this semester!

We love that students aren’t just looking for jobs, but are creating them through startups! We’re offering bursaries for

4

students interning at student startups, providing funding for student focused small businesses and linking students with amazing corporate experiences and opportunities. We’ll also be running heaps of workshops on resumé building, personal branding, job interviews and more, and taking free headshots on campus every week! For more info, head to qutguild.com/employmenthub.

It’s important to remember though, uni isn’t just about studying and jobs - it’s also about having fun! We’re super excited to announce that the Botanic Bar is Australia’s number one uni bar YET AGAIN! This goes to show just how much QUT students like to have fun. That’s why we’ve got epic parties, an international welcome dinner, creative industries festival and more open air cinemas lined up! We’re also giving out an additional $100 000 in club funding so that our 170+ clubs and societies can continue to throw incredible events!

In other news, this semester we’ll be running our fruit and veg markets EVERY Thursday!

We know just how tight a student budget can be, and that’s why we’re pumped to be able to bring you a bag full of fruit and veg for only $5! We’re also working on an exciting project that will bring you cheap coffee - so keep your eyes peeled!

To stay up to date with all our projects, make sure you’ve liked the QUT Guild on Facebook!

Yoursinbeers,studiesand an ever open office door, Isobella

G U I L D 101

YOUR2018 execs

Isobella Powell

Emily McIntyre

Jayden Dawson

Jack Collins

Bethany Fitzsimon

Georgiana Vine

Thomas Pumpa

Gurvinder Singh

Sport

International

Larissa McGovern

Nicholas Lam

Olivia Wood

Kelsey Robbie

Daniel Cabrera Lozano

Samantha Crossley

Jiajun Tian

Universe

Kate McCormack

Nissah Blanchfield

Universe

Kaveesha Samaraweera

Juval Stephens

Dominique Tassell

Callum Scott

President

Student Rights

Student Rights

Universe

Secretary

Campus Culture

Campus Culture

Universe

Treasurer

Gender & Sexuality

Gender & Sexuality

Universe

Universe

Sport

International

Universe

Universe

5

G U I L D 101

LETTER fromthe

THE UNIVERSE TEAM Dominique Tassell Editor Nissah Blanchfield Marketing Samantha Crossley Clubs Communication Kate McCormack Journalist Callum Scott Portfolio Projects Juval Stephens Portfolio Projects Kaveesha Samaraweera Intern Coordinator Jiajun Tian Photography

EDITORS Welcome to Universe!

You now officially have in your hands the one stop guide to uni from your personal uni wingmen! Inside this edition you’ll find everything you need to know about surviving student life, and who better to be with you at every step of the struggle than other normal students?

We’ve covered everything from assignments, exercise and other trauma, all the way to laughs and games. What more could you ask for? Universe is dedicated to keeping you up to date with everything that’s anything on campus. Our approximate knowledge of it all should be enough to get you through (or at least provide the tools to make you sound competent). Keep an eye out for online content, and weekly “What’s On?” posts for the best of #qutlife.

Get keen for semester two!

Your Universe Team

follow your social hub

GUILD NEWS, WHAT’S ON, LIFESTYLE + A LITTLE BIT OF PROCRASTINATION 6

QutUNIVERSE QUT_GUILD QG_UNIVERSE

what is

QUTGUILD? The QUT guild is an awesome organisation, run by students, for the benefit of students. Think of us as your personal uni wingman.

We do heaps around campus, including funding over 160 clubs and societies and organising Queensland’s largest social sport competition. We run a 24/7 academic advocacy service, food banks at each campus, a second hand bookstore, offer free legal advice and much, much more! We do all this because we know uni is much more than just classes. It’s our goal to ensure QUT students have the best uni experience in the world.

Unlike most Australian student unions and guilds, the QUT Guild is 100% financially independent from the uni!

Under EPIC, we don’t take any SSAF money (that annoying $150 you pay the uni each semester). Being financially independent means we can advocate for students against the university and be your student voice without fear of losing funds. Your rights and wellbeing are our first and only priority!

We finance our epic services through our bars, stores and academic gown hire.

Next time you find yourself in the bar at 11am or downing a bag of pick and mix lollies, don’t feel guilty. Instead, think of yourself as helping your mates out by funding our 1800WINGMAN service, food bank and second hand bookstore.

YOURPERSONALUNIWINGMAN Each year our 1800 WINGMAN service helps over 1600 students in need of academic advocacy. We’ve always got your back, and ensure the university treats you fairly.

SOCIALSPORT Keeping fit can be hard when you’re always studying or socialising, but research shows that staying active is important for your mental health. We have over 2000 participants in our social sport program, so it’s also a great way to make friends and keep fit.

CLUBSANDSOCIETIES Before EPIC, there were less than 30 clubs on campus. Now, there are over 160! We help fund all of these clubs and societies because together they make up the culture of our campuses. They provide fantastic professional and social opportunities so get out there and join a few!

FOODBANK We know times can get tough, so we’ve opened a second food bank!

You can visit up to three times per semester, no questions asked.

Simply head to X Block at Gardens Point, or C block at Kelvin Grove for more information.

STUDENTRIGHTS Your rights are our biggest priority. Whether you think the university is pulling one over on you, or you just have a lecturer that isn’t treating you fairly, we want to help you! We’ll be out on campus each week, so come down, say hi and feel free to vent.

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when times get tough

THE QUT GUILD HAS YOUR BACK NOW AVAILABLE AT GARDENS POINT TOO!

f odbank X BLOCK, LEVEL 2, GARDENS POINT

C BLOCK, LEVEL 2, KELVIN GROVE

buy and sell

USED TEXTBOOKS WE TAKE ANY CURRENT EDITION TEXTBOOKS FROM ANY UNIVERSITY

G BLOCK, ROOM 201, GARDENS POINT • WWW.QGTEXTBOOKS.COM

G U I L D 101

WHATWE’VE been up to in SEMESTERONE helped over 1000 students with grievances against uni standardised submission time open air cinema guild games gp foodbank fruit & veg markets togafest handed out over 6000 pancakes at puppies & pancakes FOLLOW US FOR ALL THELATESTNEWSANDEVENTS

QUTGUILD QUT_GUILD 9

G U I L D 101

PUPPIES+ pancakes Uni can be pretty stressful at times! Studies by the National Youth Mental Health Foundation found that over 70% of university students report high or very high levels of psychological stress.

In particular, exam block places a huge amount of pressure on students, bring many weeks of worry and stress. Trying to catch up on weeks worth of study while also finishing off that last assignment can be extremely difficult, especially when you’re also balancing work and family commitments plus trying to maintain a social life. It’s often during this time that we start to get caught up in all the stress, and forget to take care of ourselves. Maintaining a positive headspace and looking after your mental health is extremely important for ensuring your best performance in an exam!

That's why every exam block, we host four epic days of puppies and pancakes!

It’s been proven that cuddling puppies and other furry animals reduces stress, and that’s why we bring in the AWLQ’s cutest puppies and QLD’s furriest farm animals. We also have our Guild team serving up thousands of pancakes drenched in Nutella and hundreds of litres of hot milo, coffee and tea! If that doesn’t cure your exam blues, don’t forget about the ball pit, art therapy and so much more!

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photos from

GUILD BALL

grab a drink

AFTER CLASS YOU DESERVE ONE

P BLOCK, LEVEL 3, GARDENS POINT

C BLOCK, LEVEL 4, KELVIN GROVE

G U I L D 101

CAMPUS CULTURE Nick

recap

Welcome Back to Semester Two Semester one saw over 170 clubs and societies on campus take student life at QUT to the next level! From us, there was also a Survivor party, a Glow party and many others along the way. All the extra effort that our clubs put in really showed, across so many great social and professional nights.

Here are some of our favourites:

BSX

QUT Economics and Finance Society With fake cash and poker chip stocks at the ready, students went head to head like it was a trading floor on Wall Street to either get rich quick, or get drunk quicker. Those who profited won big and took home a fantastic prize, and those who didn’t were having too much fun to care. All in all, another successful day at the office.

Panel Night QUT Journalism and Media Society On the flip side of things, the industry night held by JAMS went off like clockwork. One of the most interesting professional events

of the semester, we heard from speakers whose businesses and livelihoods revolved around social media, and how they managed that lifestyle. On top of that, everyone was very well fed!

StudentWelcomeReception QUT Singaporean Student Association

One of the more elegant events throughout the semester, the SSA held a wonderful dinner reception to ring in the new year. This was a great way to help our friends from overseas settle into life in Brisbane and at QUT. With prizes drawn, lots of great food and even better company, the welcome reception left everybody wanting more!

Special mentions also go out to the Creative Industries Society for their ‘Anything but Clothes’ Pub Crawl, AMPed for their unforgettable ‘EOFY’ End of Sem event, and QUT Surfers for their regular weekends out and how to surf lessons!

QUT Ball Even with all these events going on, we were still busy behind the scenes

Bethany planning the best Guild Ball yet. Darling & Co played host to us and 700 of our friends as we ventured down the rabbit hole, and partied long into the night. With wandering magicians showing off their tricks, an enchanting dancing Absolem, and even a visit from the Mad Hatter himself, Guild Ball will go down for us as one of the best nights in the year. We already can’t wait for the next one.

Don’t forget that the Club Awards night is coming up in semester two, and there are tonnes of prizes up for grabs for award winning clubs and individuals, ranging from extra funding to cool freebies. Stay locked to our socials to find out how to nominate.

We’ve had a heap of fun so far this year, and we can’t wait to see what clubs have planned for semester two!

As always, make sure to reach out to us via campusculture@qutguild.com if you need a hand, from starting a club to booking a room, or anything in between.

Love, Nick and Bethany 15

new kids C LU B S

ONTHEBLOCK Newly Affiliated Clubs in Semester One

QUTExerciseand +PhysiologySociety

QUTGermaNSOCIETY

QUTPokemon

QUTTableTennis

QUTNatureSociety

QUTPakistani StudentAssociation

EcoQUT

QUTCulinaryClub

QUTRepublicanClub

QUTGloriousCampusClub

AhmadiyyaMuslim StudentAssociation

QUTPapuaNewGuinea 16

Student Rights Hub Your Personal Uni Wingman

HERE TO HELP YOU WHEN YOU NEED IT MOST! ACADEMIC MISCONDUCT APPEALS AGAINST EXCLUSION REVIEW OF GRADES

Shane

GENERAL GRIEVANCE

1800 WINGMAN wingman@qutguild.com

Jessica

STUDENT RIGHTS

STUDENT rights

In 2018, Stud Rights has tu ent a large part rned o focus to exp f our a our welfare p nding rogram.

FoodBank Fruit & Veg Market We know as students that managing uni, work and expenses can be difficult and it only takes a couple of unexpected expenses to put you in a tough situation. Our Foodbank service aims to provide you with peace of mind if you ever get caught out before payday. Our Foodbanks hold a number of pantry, dairy, fresh fruit and veg and hygiene products. We never ask you to provide any personal information, all you have to do is email studentrights@qutguild.com to organise a time to use it. In expanding the popular service we’ve also added another Foodbank at GP!

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In 2018, we’ve introduced Fruit and Veg Co-op Markets!

Through these markets, we‘re hoping to make healthy eating and looking after yourself a lot cheaper and easier! All profits made from the Fruit and Veg Co-op go directly back into expanding and servicing the Co-op and Foodbank. We’re excited to announce our markets will now run weekly! Catch us EVERY Thursday from 2-3pm, alternating from GP to KG each week – for more details, head to our Facebook page!

SPORTS

BENEFITSOF social SPORT TEAMWORK Teamwork is a well-known life skill, and what better way to develop that skill than to play sport in a fun environment?

Better than group assignments, right?

You’ll learn how to work well with others, support your fellow teammates and also develop other important values such as resilience, responsibility and patience.

BRAINPOWER Exercise has been proven to boost academic performance, due to an increase in blood flow to the brain.

Kicking goals and shooting hoops can help improve concentration, creativity and memory, and it’s a great way to break away from that report!

MENTALWELLBEING Exercise increases serotonin levels, and serotonin makes you happy.

It makes sense then to exercise regularly, and what better way than to join a social sport team. Relieve your stress by running towards the try line in touch or pegging the ball at the opposition in dodgeball!

Stayfitandhealthy Staying fit is an obvious benefit to social sport, but there are some added bonuses that may have slipped your mind. Exercise can improve sleep, something all uni students love, and can help advance coordination and balance too.

BeingSocial Social sport gives students the opportunity to be part of a fun and energetic community. It’s an easy way to make friends, because the competition is full of different people who love sport. Through social interaction and encouragement from others, social sport makes you feel good on the inside as well as the outside.

WWW.SPORT.QUTGUILD.COM

want to find out more about qut guild social sport?

qut guild social sport 19

QUTGUILD

SPORT

SEM 2 SOCIAL SPORT

LOOKING FOR A FUN, SOCIAL ACTIVITY DURING SEMESTER?

With 9 sports to choose from, we welcome groups and individuals of any level of ability.

10 WEEKS OF SOCIAL SPORT, PLUS

FREE ENTRY to the Social Sports Awards Night with bar tabs, pizza & more FREE ENTRY to Social Sport Events at Botanic Bar & The Grove...

FREE QUT Social Sport Tee!

Registration closes July 27, or earlier should competition capacity be reached.

REGULAR PRICE*

INDIVIDUAL $77

$99

TEAM

$660

$605

BASKETBALL NETBALL VOLLEYBALL BADMINTON TOUCH DODGEBALL

REGISTRATION PRICES

EARLY BIRD PRICE* (O WEEK)

SOCCER

TENNIS ULTIMATE FRISBEE

* Registrations open now. Early bird special finishes on July 22. * Prices apply to all sports except Badminton. For Badminton prices, please check www.sports.qutguild.com

REGISTRATIONS NOW OPEN! FOR MORE INFO

f QUT GUILD SOCIAL SPORT

Epic Snow Tours is an Australian Snow Tour Company which is based in Brisbane and

provides unique guided snow experiences to the snowiest destinations around the world!

epicsnowco • epicsnow.co

LIFEST YLE

tips+ TONAILTHAT INTERVIEW ByKaveeshaSamaraweera+StefanRalston

Many job candidates do so well to get to the interview stage, but stumble at the last hurdle. Interviews can be traumatic and nerve wracking times, so we’ve consulted QUT’s HR specialist in the making and Australian HR Institute Ambassador Stefan Ralston for some tips to get you over the line.

Confidence is key Make sure to exude confidence (but not arrogance) throughout your whole interview process. Remember, the hard part is done; you already have the interview! That means the employer already considers you the right person for the job, they wouldn’t waste your time (or more importantly theirs) if you weren’t an appointable candidate. All that’s left is to show that you’re just as good in real life as you are on paper.

Don’t Assume When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me. If you walk into the interview expecting the panel to know all about you and have your documents handy, then you might be in for a shock. Make sure to take a copy of anything relevant just in case. If you fail to prepare, you prepare to fail.

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Use Examples It’s easy for anyone to claim that they have the skills required for a job, and that’s why it is so important to have proof and examples to back up what you say. Lying in a job interview or on your CV won’t get you anywhere (in fact it might seriously damage your career prospects when other companies find out), nor will using empty words – the employer has seen it all before.

Make sure your examples are engaging and add substance to your experience and qualifications.

Be Polite Just because the receptionist isn’t interviewing you, doesn’t mean they won’t influence the outcome. Make sure you have your etiquette in check from the first phone call or email, all the way up to the interview. If the interviewers or other staff already have an unfavourable opinion of you pre-interview, then it’s a very difficult climb to change their minds.

Ask Questions The correct response to “Do you have any questions for us?” is not “No, thank you” or “I think you’ve covered everything”.

Make sure you have something insightful to offer, so it looks like you have taken what they said on board. Some easy go-to

questions could be about upward/lateral progression opportunities within the company, the nature of the organisational culture, or something as simple as “what is your turnover rate?” or “what does your training and orientation program involve?”.

Don’t Prepare Responses Nobody wants to hear your predetermined responses to every question they have.

Sure, practice some lines of answering particular type of questions, but each interview panellist will have their own style of questioning, so it’s important to be wary. Most importantly, not preparing responses will show that you can do things impromptu - which is what many employers will be looking for - and if it goes well it’ll definitely impress the panel.

Lastly, it’s important to make sure that you are actually answering the question you are being asked, so make sure to adjust anything you are about to say to fit the context of the question.

And that’s all there is to it! Make those simple adjustments to your interview strategy and your phone will be ringing with job offers in no time. If you want to know more, the HR and Management based club, QUT BAMSA is definitely the right place to go!

HOW TO prepare BEGINNING END lieves good ntre) firmly be Br yson Head (ce a good GPA p m tru ll always networking wi

FOR THE

OF THE

ByKateMcCormack

Whether your graduation is just around the corner or you plan on stretching your degree out until 2028, at some point in the future you will be facing the beginning of the end of your time at uni.

Universe caught up with two recent QUT graduates who have both gone on to score their dream jobs in their chosen careers. We picked their brains about how they set themselves up for employment success after their degree and how to best prepare yourself for the end of your time at university.

Jenny Archdall, QUT journalism graduate and the newest member of the WIN News team in Wagga Wagga, firmly believes it’s never too late to get experience.

“While you’re applying for jobs you can continue to do internships to gain more experience as well as connections,” said Archdall.

“And don’t be coy about using the connections you’ve made. Send emails with your resume out, they might not have jobs currently going but if you keep in contact you could be at the forefront of their mind when they do.”

Jenny also stresses that sometimes patience is key. You may not find yourself in your dream career the day after graduation.

“Be prepared to wait, some people

will leave uni and be straight into their dream job but for others it can take up to six months (or longer) to find full-time employment... don’t give up and you’ll get there! Just keep pestering and checking in on your connections.”

Graduate Earth Science student, Bryson Head, urges students not to get too cocky in their final semester.

“Even though you think you’ve got it down to a fine art, give yourself more than 1% margin for error on your final target grade!”

But the junior geologist also warns that your grades are not the be all and end all.

“Your GPA doesn’t mean anything if you’ve spent any reasonable amount of time throughout the years networking and meeting people within your industry. It’s easier, and way less stressful if you can find a job through people you know, rather than going through the hoops of a grad job application. ”

“The earlier the better, exams are a busy time, so I would highly recommend using the September break to refine a list of who you’d like to work for. Have your CV and a cover letter template ready to go and start emailing businesses throughout the holiday period.”

One last piece of crucial information comes from Shane Snow, from QUT Guild’s Wingman student advocacy service.

“The first thing all students need to be made aware of is that they are entitled to up to two supplementary assessments in their final 96 credit points if they receive a grade of 3. This means they don’t have to come back just to redo one unit. It’s amazing how many students don’t know that!”

If you have any questions about your academic situation, reach out to the Guild’s Wingmen via wingman@ qutguild.com or on the 24-hour help hotline 1800 WINGMAN.

If you’re nearing the end of your time at university and you can’t boast a high GPA or a broad professional network, don’t sweat it!

Bryson says it’s never too late to start.

“Finding a company you’d enjoy working for, turning up cold and asking if you could do some work experience for one to two days a week is a great place to start. It may not always work with large businesses, but small to medium sized places are hardly going to turn down the offer of free work.”

Bryson does however advise if you want to consider yourself employed in industry before Christmas, you need to start early.

QUT Journalis

m graduate, Je

nny Archdall

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I N T E R N AT I O N A L

THINGS TO EXPECT FROM

STUDYING abroad ByGurvinderSingh You know what's tougher than 3. Challenges in your University? Doing it abroad! assignments!

Regardless of your background, starting university as a student can be intimidating. Personally, I wish someone would have given me some advice beforehand so that I could have better prepared.

Here are three things you can expect from uni as an international student!

1. Lots of events Firstly, you can expect for QUT clubs to be hosting events throughout the semester! This would be a good way for you to meet new students and possibly develop a long-term friendship through engaging with them. When I initially came to Australia, I was a bit homesick and bored from just attending lectures and doing assignments. Once I started attending various events it helped to grow my network and I even found friends who were in my course! Through the Guild, Daniel and I have weekly International Hangs that is hosted every Wednesday evening for students to come together at Kundu Park and have a relaxed evening during the week! Do join us in Semester 2 for it!

2. Changes in lifestyle and culture Queensland is a vibrant state and has a wide range of culture that is displayed on and off the University campus. Get ready to experience Australians using terms such as “arvo” for Afternoon or “Straya” for Australia, but don’t worry you’ll eventually adapt to it! The Guild is here to help you with any issues you have in adapting to the environment, so do come to us if we can be of any help!

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Studying at QUT has been very different compared to my education back in Singapore, as the education system is more laid back than what I am used to. Assignments are given beforehand and you have ample time to complete them. However, this led me to procrastinate on some of my assignments till the last minute, which I would not suggest for anyone! Although it is more laid back than expected, you should not take it lightly and procrastinate on your assignments. Therefore, do your assignment beforehand and if you have any issues with it, speak to your tutors about it or come to the Guild and we will do our best to help you!

Here are a few tips on how you can balance both academics and social life through your journey in QUT!

•

Follow the QUT Guild and QUT Universe pages to update yourself on upcoming events

•

Attend Orientation as this would be a great time to make new friends!

• •

Join various student clubs and actively participate in them.

•

Speak to your peers and clarify questions you have! People here are willing to help!

Get a calendar and fill in all your assignments and events you plan to attend for the semester! This will help you keep track of what is due soon.

I N T E R N AT I O N A L

THREE

GAME G AMECHANGING principles ByDanielCabrera

HOWTONAILSTUDYINGABROAD

As the plane takes off and then lands in a new place, many thoughts can cross your mind. Doubt and uncertainty can easily consume the thoughts of a young adult when first travelling abroad for long-term study. Visa requirements, family expectations and personal goals begin placing pressure over a journey that has only begun and will continue to unravel over the course of years.ThefollowingarethreeencouragingprinciplesthathaveenhancedmyexperienceasaQUT international student that I believe can act as a game changer for your time at university!

STEP OUTOFIT! Perhaps this sounds like a clichéd phrase that sends chills down your spine. Being distant from those who’ve shaped you and away from the roots of the culture that watched you grow can leave a sense of emptiness. At first, this may seem like an unhappy space, but do not be mistaken.

Being away from home can be a massive opportunity! Attending social events or joining an interesting club from the very beginning can set you up for a win, and enhance your university experience. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not about attending a party and meeting hundreds of strangers, but rather about positioning yourself to find the countable few who will become your uni-years-family. We all long for a place to belong and uni provides these by the dozen. It’s easy to get caught up in the comfort-zone of “gathering amongst friends of the same tongue” or “staying at home for another episode of that TV show”. But who knows? - You might be one trivia night or BBQ away from making lifelong friends.

DON’TSETTLE, KEEPEXPLORING!

PAUSINGISNOT PROCRASTINATING!

The difference between a great uniexperience and a not-so-great one goes well beyond the books and lectures.

There is always more to explore across campus than what you have got currently on your plate. Get involved with campus life, become an active member of a student club, put together a social sports team or help with a regular Guild event.

Become part of something larger than yourself and watch how you grow and earn experience in areas you never even imagined.

On a personal level, juggling between work, volunteer roles, extracurricular activities and full time studies can easily result in a “yeah good but busy” kind of life. This, although quite “normal” for the average student is not ideal. Practicing activities that replenish you and provide authentic rest (not merely a distraction) will result in a higher performance and better attitude across challenging periods of study. Challenge yourself to a bit of rest, and treat your mind to pause in the middle of busy weeks. You’ll be amazed at the results that quality rest can have on your academic and young professional years.

stay up to date with the latest from our international execs qutguildinternational

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G E N D E R + S E X UA L I T Y

CHECKyourself ByOLIVIAWOOD At the start of semester 1, this gal found herself recently single and not quite sure what to do next. A friend suggested that I first get an STI check, 'just to check, you know'. This got me thinking and suddenly I had A LOT of questions, and so started my semester long search for the answers around sexual health, when & where I could get STI checks, and of course why! Here’s what I found (and be prepared, I’m a nursing student, so this is technical):

What is an STI?

STI stands for sexually transmissible infection, and they are infections that can be passed from one person to another during unprotected sex or just from intimate genital contact. This includes insertion of fingers, sex-toys and any other objects, that might be contaminated, into the vagina, mouth or anus.

It’s also possible to transmit viruses such as warts and cold sores (herpes) just from skin-to-skin contact, like kissing!

I found out that STIs are caused by microscopic bacteria or parasites, but that sometimes STIs don’t always cause visible symptoms!

What puts you at risk of an STI?

“Unprotected” vaginal or anal sex seemed to be the common answer to this question.

Unprotected sex seems to be the common term used when sexual partners don’t use barrier protection such as male or female condoms for penetrative sex, or a male condom or dental dam for oral sex.

Some other factors that increase your risk of acquiring an infection are thing such as:

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Having sex with casual partners...the more partners = a greater risk. Having sex with someone who has had unprotected sex with other casual partners…who know what they are carrying? When you are having sex while travelling outside of Australia. Ditto if your partner has had unprotected sex while travelling outside Australia. Having sex with a partner who has injected drugs (IV drug use, the reuse of needles, or use of unclean needles can cause transmission of HIV and Hepatitis C amongst other things).

There’s also increased risk for men who have unprotected sex with other men.

a professionally-collected blood sample for testing. Depending on whether you have any symptoms the clinician may ask to take some swabs of any genital sores.

They may also want to do a cervical screen test for women, or a prostate exam for men as this time.

When should I get tested?

•

QUT Medical Centre recommend students are tested at the end of a sexual relationship, before starting a new sexual relationship, after any unsafe sexual contact or if you think you may have an STI.

Where can I get tested?

I got in touch with various organisations here in Brisbane. Here is a list of organisations which offer free (bulkbilled) STI testing to university students:

• • • • • • •

QUT Medical Centre (QUT GP & KG Campuses) PASH (Princess Alexandra Hospital) RAPID (Fortitude Valley) True Relationships (Windsor) Brisbane Sexual Health Clinic (BNE CBD) Metro North Sexual Health and HIV Service (Roma St – BNE CBD, & Kippa Ring – Redcliffe) The Marie Stopes Clinic at Woolloongabba

What’s a typical appointment going to be like?

The appointment will generally go for about 30 minutes. During this time, you will be asked questions about your sexual activity and health. You may also need to provide a self-collected urine sample and

Some things to ponder: Don’t count on a partner to offer you the information you need. If you are thinking about having unprotected sex, make sure you first ask your partner:

• •

Have they had an STI before?

When was the last time they were tested for STIs? What were they tested for?

Have they had sex with anyone since they were last tested?

It can be a little embarrassing, but make sure you do ask these questions, and if you get asked, be honest! They have a right to know if there is a risk of getting an STI and to decide whether or not they are okay to have unprotected sex.

What else is out there?

In 2017, a collaboration between 13 HEALTH, Pathology Qld & Communicable Diseases Branch launched a pilot project which offers at home, free gonorrhoea and chlamydia testing. 16+ participants can order a home mailing kit, pee on a stick and send it back in the mail. While this is not the same visiting a clinic for a comprehensive check, I found it super simple, I got my results texted back to me in less than a week, and I got a follow up call to make sure that I didn’t have any symptoms.

So there’s a quick snapshot of some of the things I have learnt. Want to know more? Got questions? Then make sure you visit the websites for the clinics listed above, call 13 432 584 (13 HEALTH) or get in contact with us at genderandsexuality@qutguild.com

G E N D E R + S E X UA L I T Y

MENTALHEALTH and you ByGeorgianaVine

Life as a student isn't always bad - we get plenty of discounts, opportunities to make lifelong friends, and the benefit of attending lit club events (that are normally accompanied by a healthy bar tab). However, like most things in life, there are are always a few cons. Being at university presents a number of unique challenges to students' mental health and wellbeing.

Our years that we spend at university just so happen to coincide with the peak age of onset for a variety of mental health conditions, with 75% of all mental health difficulties developing by the mid-20s.

Our generation often cops a lot of hate, being deemed the ‘entitled generation’ - I feel that we are all a bit tired of constantly being told about how easy we have it nowadays - especially when research shows that today’s generation of young adults are more likely to experience mental illness than previous generations.

Largely due to the lack of close support and trust channels, this absence of a sense of community has been identified as one of the biggest challenges to student mental health. Simple factors like this can largely impact on our willingness to get involved in university life. In order to help create a platform where both students and staff can be supported, it is extremely important that we find, and become apart of a powerful community with a stable support network that we can all rely and fall back on at any time.

Over a quarter of students qualify as having a clinical level of psychological distress.

This is associated with an increased risk of depression, anxiety, personality disorders, and substance abuse. Over the past five years, universities have experienced a significant increase in demand for counselling services.

Having a strong support system in place is fundamental to your mental health and wellbeing. It will also promote a sense of belonging, resulting in positive wellbeing and improved mental health outcomes.

We all have mental health, and therefore, it is all of our responsibility to fulfil our role in creating a healthy and accepting university community so that each and every one of us can feel comfortable, and perform at our best.

For most of us, our time at university are the first years we will spend away from our comfortable, established networks of support. This can provide a gap where feelings such as depression, anxiety, sadness, loneliness, and insecurity can seep through and begin to weigh us down.

We want to empower all students at uni to become an active member in supporting better student mental health. We need to ignite the conversation about mental

health, and empower as many people as we can to seek support if they need it. We should all have someone that we can turn to. However, if you are feeling a bit lonely, or feel that you may be experiencing the initial symptoms of progressive mental illness, please, please, please don’t be afraid to speak up. You aren’t weak if you need help. In fact, you are so strong for simply acknowledging that you are in an unhealthy mindset.

If you are curious to learn more about the of mental health, look out for QUT Guild’s mental health week coming up in october! We will be hosting a morning tea at 10am on the 10th of October to coincide with World Mental Health Day. We encourage you to come along and take a moment to really consider the importance of reducing the stigma that surround mental illness.

If this article has highlighted any concerns for yourself or someone you love, please seek help immediately. You can talk to your GP, seek counselling or contact the QLD Alcohol and Drug Information Service (ADIS)—1800 177 833.

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G E N D E R + S E X UA L I T Y

IT’S JUST RECREATIONAL HaveyoudevelopedanAccidentalDrugDependency?

ByEmilyHill Everyonehashadsomeone tell you that university is the best time of your life.

I humbly disagree.

relieve stress and improve concentration.

We’re talking meditation, scheduling tips, yoga, seeing a university counselor, budgeting or lightening your study load for a semester.

Don’t be mistaken, university is fantastic. You have plenty of unallocated time, a disposable income (hello online shopping and a mid year trip to Europe), and the freedom to sleep in most days if you choose to.

However, when you’re in a moment of overwhelming stress, unfamiliarity or a dark nightclub with your friends, none of those options seem like the quickest or most effective way to relieve the pressure and have a good time (or get your assignment done on time without crying).

But it’s also really hard. You are studying upwards of 20 hours a week, you most likely have a part time job, financial pressures (the side effects of online shopping and a mid-year trip to Europe), while trying to maintain your social life, exercise three times a week, and eat a decent meal – you know, vegetables or something green.

What is readily available to students and relatively fast acting is both drugs and alcohol. Recreational drug use is prevalent among a typically young student demographic, and many people believe that recreational drug use is fine as long as it is causing little harm to yourself or others.

Whether you’re in a good place and you feel a-okay, or you’re struggling to even get through the day without a panic attack, we all have different levels of capacity to cope with the stresses of life. And with all of the things mentioned above, it’s not a wonder students are looking to anything and everything that will help relieve some of the strain on our mental health.

In recent years, many universities have shone the spotlight on the positive and practical techniques students can use to

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Drug addiction or dependency however is a very different story. There is a huge social stigma relating to drug dependency, and it takes great bravery for someone to seek help.

Unfortunately, this is leading a huge number of young people to develop a drug dependency or addiction without being aware of it.

As a 21 year old student working in a drug and alcohol rehabilitation centre, I am constantly supporting people

who began their relationship with drug dependency as a way to help themselves relax on a Friday night. But Fridays quickly turn into Friday and Saturday. Friday and Saturday become Sunday too, and then Monday as well.

Before you know it, you can’t really feel alive without the effects of the drugs or alcohol – the world doesn’t seem as bright without it, you don’t feel as alert or awake, you never really have as much fun, or perhaps you can’t fall asleep unless your thoughts have been placated. These are just a few potential signs of psychological drug dependence. More importantly, they are signs that your recreational drug use may be more serious than you think, and your mental and physical health may need some professional attention.

If this article has highlighted any concerns for yourself or someone you love, please seek help immediately. You can talk to your GP, seek counselling or contact the QLD Alcohol and Drug Information Service (ADIS)—1800 177 833. The QUT Guild is dedicated to creating a safe space for students to access the resources they require for a full and healthy study experience.

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LIFEST YLE

LAWLIBRARYto implementnew SECURITY MEASURES ByKaveeshaSamaraweera

QUT’s Faculty of Law has today announced a new plan to introduce security guards outside the fabled law library on Gardens Point campus. The announcement comes after fears that too many law students are bringing shame upon the degree by engaging in various fashion faux pas such as coming to uni in their sherbet leisurewear, or even worse, sneans.

“It’s unbelievable, back in the day we were able to preserve the sanctity of the law degree because students knew the way to make it clear that you studied law was to flaunt some genuine Australian leather, and a horse on your chest” said a sixth year student who didn’t want to be identified. “And now after the PM has come out and told us how useless our degree is, everyone thinks that means it’s time to blend in with the rest of those plebs in SEF.” The new system will compel students to present their student IDs - to prove that they are indeed an Honours scholar – followed by a screening of their attire, with nothing short of designer being allowed in.

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Now I'm going have to ask Dad for more money," guffawed a concerned first year, "this is still better than having to settle for creative industries though.

We approached representatives from both the faculty and the Law Society, but both declined to comment.

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LIFEST YLE

So I’m standing there in netherworld playing connect 4 and watching a b grade sci fi flick in a fucking polo dress looking like I’m ready to fuck a golfer.

I just got off the lift with someone who had a shopping trolley tattooed on their arm.

If Pauline Hanson came out and said ‘asians and muslims, I’m loving them’ you should probably fact check.

-journo lecturer

Facemasks are like a bandaid on my life. They make me feel like I have my shit together.

Imagine being in the middle of sex and just going ‘okay google, play Spotify.’

I’m just gonna pick a car and try and get into it. It’ll be fun. And not at all illegal.

I’m no chemist but that much handsome and that Does your USB get much dumb does not heavier the more you save balance out. stuff to it?

Orally I perform excellently.

- a guy talking about speaking English

The ocean was inside me, I think I have a UTI. Person 1: *steals phone charger* Person 2: dude that’s mine Person 1: I’m not gonna ask, it’s already in Person 2: sounds like every guy I’ve ever dated

These bangs are ruining my fucking life.

How long do you think I can look up sex-related buzzfeed quizzes on this uni computer before I get into trouble?

Girl at a 9am tutorial: I mean, I made it...

The buttons for my car windows had to be taken out because when you used them it started a fire and the air con can only work on high, but other than that it’s a really good car.

If that thing doesn’t work, use your mouth.

Where’s the best place to cry on campus?

Person 1: Do you remember what the lecturer said about the assignment last week?

Person 2: I dropped that unit 7 weeks ago, definitely haven’t been there.

She called a bush turkey a bin chicken. That’s just wrong.

Person 1: He’s cute but ridiculously stupid.

Person 2: Isn’t that your type?

They snuck me in and out like I was an illegal immigrant.

GOTASUBMISSIONFOR “OVERHEARDONCAMPUS”?

Email us at universe@qutguild.com

BEST OF

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LIFEST YLE

selfEXPRESSION

ATUNI

AND WHY IT'S IMPORTANT

By Sarah Carroll

University can be a confusing time, but it’s also a place for freedom and openness, to work out who you really are and what you really want in life.

Katie and Brianna are QUT students, studying Biomedical Science and Social Work respectively.

I met these girls at the recent QUT Guild Ball where they stood out for their bold choices in appearance, from Katie’s shaved head to Brianna’s sizeable back tattoo. I spoke to the girls about the importance of expression, especially at university, and how it helps create you.

HAVEYOUGOTTENMUCH NEGATIVITYABOUTTHESE THINGS? Katie: People didn’t really expect me to be someone who would shave their head but no one has been really negative about it.

Brianna: The only negativity I have gotten about my tattoos has been from my family. However, I recognise that they are from another generation. My dad is especially concerned about employability and an aunty who believes I am just following a ‘trend’. I have family who don’t really understand things like self-expression and personal autonomy.

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WHOHASBEENYOURMAIN WHY DO YOU THINK IT’S SUPPORTBASEINEXPRESSING IMPORTANT TO EXPRESS YOURSELF? YOURSELF AT UNI? Katie: I didn’t really have a support base.

I kind of went “this is something I want to do, so I’m going to do it”. I didn’t really feel like I needed someone to suggest it or agree with it.

Brianna: I have a group of friends who have been a great support base. We are very like-minded in that we are big advocates for self-expression, body positivity and supporting individuality. It’s an environment with no judgement and that’s really refreshing.

DOYOUFEELUNIISASAFESPACE FORPERSONALEXPRESSION? Katie: I think uni is a great place to express yourself. Most people are of similar age and are starting to learn who they are and where they fit in the world, which means wearing different clothes, different amounts of makeup and styling your hair differently. I’ve definitely learnt how I’m most comfortable expressing myself since being at uni. Most people love to see you express yourself in a way that makes you comfortable and happy.

Brianna: Absolutely. There are thousands of people from all different counties, cultures and religions at uni. There are people with different interests and different backgrounds, and I feel that at uni there is no ‘right’ way to be. You’re free to have different political standings, different niche hobbies and interests, and I think all this difference and individuality is expressed in the way we can present ourselves.

Brianna: I feel the way I express myself and present myself is very reflective of who I am. When I graduated high school in 2012 and started my first uni degree I especially felt that it was the first opportunity I had to express myself fully and without judgement.

This process really helped me find myself and discover what was important to me (as corny as that sounds).

HASITMADEYOUFEELDIFFERENT INANYWAY?(E.G.EMPOWERED, CONNECTED,VULNERABLEETC.) Katie: I think the biggest difference I’ve found is that people don’t actually care as much as I thought they would. I thought I would get so much judgement or questioning on my choice. But people care less about how we look than we actually think they do. It’s made me worry less about how I look than I used to. I used to worry that someone would think something negative about me based on how I dressed. But now, I really couldn’t care less about what other people think because I know most of them don’t care either.

Brianna: I’ve definitely felt more empowered after these past few years of starting social work and expressing my individuality more freely. Ignoring the scrutiny and deciding to get my tattoos meant I felt like I had more control over my body than ever before. I often preach self-love, body positivity and ignoring negative body rhetoric, and I’m glad that I’m able to confidently practice what I preach. I express myself in ways which are unconventional, and against the status quo, but, I’ve never been happier with the way I look and how I feel.

LIFEST YLE

10people you have in EVERYCLASS ByJESSPERKINS

1. The person who asks 4.THETHOTTYNAILTYPIST 8.Theopinionatedguywho stop slamming each key with your all the questions, even if Please argues with every topic long af nails, you are seriously getting in they’re stupid. discussed the way of my ability to learn. How do you You’re interrupting my in-class zen moment with your incessant questioning.

The teacher doesn’t even know your name, so you can stop asking so many questions and just learn to ride the wave of failure like the rest of us. Okay pal?

2. Latecomers

We all know someone who walks in with 20 minutes of class to go, because something happens to “come up” on that day at that time every week. Oh and, something else just came up, so “I have to leave early” while we’re at it. But at least my name is now marked on the attendance sheet.

3. Mr. Knowitall

There’s always one person in every class who thinks they know the answer to everything. And even when their answer makes no sense whatsoever, they always unnecessarily answer with too much confidence. Shut up.

go about your day with those nails?

This is the bloke who would waste his time arguing with NASA that the earth is flat, and still think he’s right.

5. Note takers who insist on writing by hand 9. The borrower Okay buddy, it’s the 21st century and we’re in week 10 of uni. Cut the week 1 “I’m a good student” episode and just become a lazy laptop user like the rest of us. We’re all sick of you asking the tutor to go back on the slides.

6. The shopaholic

Who needs uni when you can waste money on a smashing outfit for Friday night in Brisvegas??? There’s no better time than class to online shop. Am I right or am I right? Make sure you check out those UniDays discounts while stocks last!!!

7. The person who sits up the front of every class

Homie, not sure if you know this but we can hear the exact same information by sitting at the back of the classroom. You’re blocking my view of the empty seats.

It’s week 11 and this person still comes to class unprepared and asks everyone around them for a pen, a piece of paper, a ruler, some lunch and maybe even your notes for the final exam. Who are you? Do you even belong in this class?

10. The person who uses class to catch up on sleep

We all get through uni relying on our daily naps, but this guy’s naps are costing him $50 000.

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LIFEST YLE

IRRATIONAL uni fears Waking up after midnight and realising you haven’t submitted the assignment that was due at 11:59pm.

Submitting the wrong assignment OR mixing up the due dates of your assignments

Calling the tutor ‘Mum’

A silent but deadly not being silent Getting an ugly photo at the bar and having it used as a promotional picture.

Going to class without checking blackboard when there’s no class that week

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Losing your parking ticket, finishing uni really late and then getting stuck in the parking lot.

Losing your parking ticket AND your student ID so you have to pay the full $75

Becoming a uni meme

LIFEST YLE

ANOFFICIAL ranking of QUTWILDLIFE ByDominiqueTassell QUT's campuses are home to some very distinct wildlife, and here's the official Universe ranking of best to worst.

1. Ibises

6. KG Cats

2. Stumpy

7. Snakes

3. Possums

8. Smokers

Forget tigers, the bin chicken is basically the QUT mascot.

A close second, Stumpy is the angry old man of QUT.

They’re cute but angry, like your favourite short friend.

4. Girls in activewear

She’s beauty, she’s grace, be damn sure she could beat you in a race. She’s ready for anything, including whatever her tutor is about to throw her way.

5. Ants

We all know that perfect image of students sitting on the campus lawn having a grand ole’ time. Well, truth is they’re covered in ants and hating life.

They look cute and cuddly but I wouldn’t touch them.

Sightings are fairly rare but extreme when they happen.

Once upon a time they were all contained next to the library at GP, now you’ll find them lining the perimeter of campus.

Majestic, aren’t they?

9.Thosepeoplewhoplay video games on the S block computers

No, it’s fine. No one needs that for uni work. Go ahead.

10. Socialists

Lol. Earphones in, eyes distant.

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LIFEST YLE

BEST OF

make me take ridiculous routes to class because of the construction sites EVERYWHERE

walk ridiculously slowly make us go through “ice breaker activities”

drive off in the 391 while I’m standing at the door

make me suffer through first year courses when I’m a third year student: “so this is blackboard” say “I’ll be picking someone at random to answer the question”

stop in the middle of a walkway drive off in the 391 early take forever to give us back our marks submit your section of the group assignment the day it’s due

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make me pay a ridiculous $150 on top of my overpriced fees

put activities worth marks in lectures so I have to attend

make 80% of the food at the bottom of death hill make assignments due at 9am (everything has to be due at 11:59pm from next semester, you’re welcome)

stand in the doorway on the bus then complain when people want to get out

change class plans the day before (I seriously have beef with my unit coordinator) sign up for a Monday tutorial with group work then say you can never come to them

make me write a 1000-word paper for 10%

set weekly tutorial tasks worth 2%, I don’t have time for that shit

leave your phone on loud in class when your friend is bulk texting you

require a round of applause for doing the smallest piece of work in a group assignment

post a ridiculous amount of times in the class fb group

GOT A SUBMISSION FOR “CAN YOU NOT”?

Email us at universe@qutguild.com

LIFEST YLE

sharehouse

HORRORSTORIES BEWARE!

The following uni share house horror stories will haveyoutremblinginyour Birkenstocks!

My housemate went into my room (and let other people into my room) when I had gone away, so the next time I left for a weekend back home I locked my door. They ended up climbing onto the patio from the carport roof to break into my room and sleep in my bed. They broke my window in the process but denied it even though my bed had been left unmade, there was hair in my bed and my window was obviously broken?

Jenna Nursing My boyfriend’s housemate was a complete grub. She would leave the milk out on the kitchen counter to go bad and would spend hours in the one bathroom in the house taking long baths and showers, even when we would bang on the door asking her to finish up because we needed to pee.

When she finally moved out we were giving the house a clean and found an entire bathroom drawer full of dirty sanitary pads! Weirdest girl ever!

Savannah Creative Industries

When I was looking for a share house to move into I found a particularly scary one with twelve tenants crammed into the one house. When I went downstairs to take a look at one of the bedrooms a guy in a shitty suit ran up and barged me to the side, yelling at me for making him late.

When I first looked downstairs there was six housemates in full costume, day drinking playing Dungeons and Dragons, (which isn’t too bad to be honest) the first thing they said to me was “ugh another one for the upstairs c****s”… The kitchen and shower was covered in mould and as I took a look around, the other housemates said, “don’t be all snobby and judge us”. Needless to say, I did not place an application in to the real estate.

Bryce Media+COMmmunications My friend’s bed shared a wall with his roommate’s wall and she had THREE boyfriends at the same time all of which knew about each other…

Anyway, I get a text one night of him asking me “why does she bang up against her wall so much?” Which was shortly followed by a very innocent realisation that the rhythmic banging was actually one of her three boyfriends rhythmically banging her (winky face).

It’s my first time living in a house where I’m the only girl and one of the guys pees with the door open, doesn’t lift the seat up and has terrible aim. Our toilet seat always has little piss puddles and stray hairs on it!

A previous female housemate used to share a wall with me and would always slam her door and make a lot of noise. She often came home at crazy hours in the morning and slam her doors, which would shake the wall between us and wake me up!

Adelynne Creative Industries New housemate told us her new boyfriend would be staying for a couple of days until he found a place.

She then proceeded to let him use our address for his court hearing, which he never showed up to, and he stayed over almost every night for a month despite all of the housemates banning him. He ended up skipping court multiple times (and so did she for drink driving and theft charges) and we ended up having police raids with search warrants at our house at 3AM. Good times.

Nelson Physiology

Payton Creative Industries

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P R O C R A S T I N AT I O N

games SPOTTHEDIFFERENCES (psst, there’s five to be found!)

Answers: 1. Jayden’s bow tie is green. 2. Dan is missing his glasses. 3. Tom (back left) has disappeared. 4. Sam’s clutch is pink. 5. The pattern on Beth’s dress (front centre) has disappeared.

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P R O C R A S T I N AT I O N

horoscopes Taurus

The stars have spoken and Claire Voyant, the Guild's resident psychic has your semester all worked out...

20 Apr – 20 May

You decide to take up horse riding as a means to set you apart from the crowd. Unfortunately, with your uni budget you might have to get creative on the definition of a “horse”.

Gemini 21 May – 20 Jun

With your evil demeanour in play you can often find yourself in sticky situations. This Friday at Johnny Ringo’s will be no exception.

Cancer 21 Jun – 22 Jul

Your love life ventures in a new direction, with a date on the horizon. Stay away from tacos, all the fire you need will be in the fireworks sparking off during the date. Maybe you’ll get two burritos for the price of one.

Leo

23 Jul – Aug 22 You’re confronted with an interesting debate this month about family sharing one communal piece of toilet paper. Unfortunately, you are very hungover when this debate happens and you end up being sick outside B Block in Garden’s Point.

Virgo 23 Aug – 22 Sep

You decide to follow the crowd and get a “keep-cup”. Unfortunately you fork out $45 for a glass cup that breaks the first time a barista pours your overpriced coffee.

Libra

23 Sep – 22 Oct The planets are lining up for a massive month for you. I’m sensing three speeding fines and one parking fine in your horizon.

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Scorpio 23 Oct – 21 Nov

Try changing up your look or style this month to impress that special someone. Basic is so out, but I’ve heard green mullets are in at the moment.

Sagittarius 22 Nov – 21 Dec

November to December baby, you’re the classic “it’s all about me” from years of being rejected at Christmas time. Show your family you’re really serious about it this year by not getting them any gifts.

Capricorn 22 Dec – 19 Jan

A bin chicken will attack you this month, be on the lookout.

Perhaps consider carrying some spare crackers as a decoy.

Aquarius 20 Jan – 18 Feb

You decide to be spontaneous this month and go for a drive to the beach. All four tyres burst on the way and you find yourself stranded for a few hours. My advice, pack water.

Pisces 19 Feb – 20 Mar

The stars are pointing to fishy times ahead, make sure to bite the bullet and book that doctors appointment you’ve been putting off for so long.

Aries

21 Mar – 19 Apr You will find your hair will grow a lot faster this month.

Everywhere.