Ponca City Monthly March 2023

Serving Northern Oklahoma

MARCH 2023

PONCACITYMONTHLY.COM

FREE PUBLICATION

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MARCH 2023 • VOL. 4 NO.3 Publishing Company MyMediaMatters Creative Agency Editor-in-Chief Kelsey Wagner

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Associate Editor & Advertising Director Robyn Ryan 580-761-1295 robyn@poncacitymonthly.com

BUILDING RAMPS TO FREEDOM

Staff Writers Carey Head Everett Brazil, III Andy Hicks Chelsea McConnell Kayley Spielbusch Jill Rowe Hayley Harrison Patrick Jordan Ad Designer Robyn Ryan Magazine Designer Andy Hicks

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GOOD CITIZEN SPOTLIGHT: LEMONS TO LIVING

GRAVE & GRITTY WORLD 18 THE OF GARBAGE

FEATURE STORIES

MONTHLY FAVORITES

Free 2022 Income Tax Services Available at the Ponca City Library for Low - and Middle-Income Taxpayers of All Ages

Sudoku Challenge

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Backyard Gardener

30

Teaching Artists Exhibition on View at NOC

Cocktail Of The Month: Ranch Water

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Crossword

50/62

Soulful Being: Let’s Talk Faith and Lent

26

Get Fit with Kera Kester

50

Cover Story:

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Food Crush: Bachman Family Farms

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Book Reviews

54/55

Learning with Leaming

58

Stream It

60

Stew On That with Rachel Stewart

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Kids Say The Darnedest Things

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5 Under 40

Proud Member of the Chambers of Commerce of: Ponca City, Newkirk, Tonkawa, Blackwell, Arkansas City

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Story Editor Sherry Cable Copy Editor Patrick Jordan Contributing Writers Amy Geurin Lorrie Layton Adam Leaming Kat Long Rachel Stewart Kera Kester Staff Intern Kendra Stolhand Circulation Carol Murphy

© MyMediaMatters, LLC, dba Ponca City Monthly 2023.

For permission to reproduce any article in this magazine, contact editor@poncacitymonthly.com.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or by other electronic means without written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

Ponca City Monthly is a Member of the Society of Professional Journalists.

We believe that public enlightenment is the forerunner of justice and the foundation of democracy. We strive to ensure a free exchange of information that is accurate, fair and thorough. We pledge to: Seek the Truth, and Report It; Minimize Harm; Act Independently; and to Be Accountable and Transparent. To read our full pledge, visit: spj.org/ethicscode.asp

Letter from the Editor Home is where the heart is, or least, that’s how the phrase goes. For many, their heart is here, in Ponca City. It is for me. Over the last 15 years of living in this city, it’s proven to me over and over again that this is where I want to be.

A few years later, after I started working at a local non-profit, I met the most dedicated, generous volunteers and philanthropists in this town who repeatedly gave their time, talents or treasure to the causes they believed in. They still do.

Has there been hardship? Absolutely. Launching a magazine during a pandemic was hard, but we pushed through it. And when I look back on the hard times, there was always one thing, one guiding principal, that acted as a driving force for me through that time, and that is my love for Ponca City and its people.

When I started each of my businesses, I was always given advice, mentorship and patronage from people throughout this community.

They cared about me, and they supported me. Everywhere I would go people asked me how they could help me be successful.

When I first began living in Ponca City, I met so many wonderful, helpful, kind people. I was a young stay-at-home mom at the time with a newborn and a toddler, and my husband had just been deployed.

When my husband left to go oversees, his coworkers took turns mowing my yard, once a week for an entire summer until my husband got home. My gratefulness for their help, and others during that difficult time still brings me to tears at times.

This city has shown me time and time again that this is where I was meant to be. The abundance of love and support for me, my family and my businesses is the reason I have dedicated myself to this community. That is why I launched this magazine, why I volunteer and why I care about its future. This community is my home. My heart is here. It’s where I choose to live, it’s where I choose to invest and there is no where else I would rather be.

editor@poncacitymonthly.com

On the cover:

Cover Design by Andy Hicks Photography by: Jes McIntosh

MARCH 2023

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Lemons to Living The Resilient Life of Jennifer Hurley Story and Photos by Chelsea McConnell / Staff Writer Each month Ponca City Monthly will be highlighting an area community member in our Good Citizen Spotlight.

The goal of each spotlight is to honor a citizen who is making our community a better place every day through the goodness, kindness and strength of his/her character.

We’ve all heard the adage about life handing us lemons and what we’re supposed to do next. But what does this look like in practice? What would you do with real-life lemons, like the deaths of loved ones and a stroke that landed you in a wheelchair?

We all face difficulties in life and we all get to choose how we let those difficult things shape us. You can let the hard things harden you. You can make yourself small, shrinking away from life. You can also choose to take the hard things and make them work for you.

Upon meeting Jennifer Hurley, it’s immediately clear that she has taken the difficult things life has dealt her and used them to hone her strength and resilience.

Being in her presence is akin to basking in the sun on a warm spring day. She is wholehearted, kind, full of light and quite good at making proverbial lemonade.

Jennifer was born in Texas and grew up in Ponca City. Her dad, Bill Hicks, served as principal at Po-Hi for many years and was even her principal, which Jennifer loved.

Jennifer’s mom was in education as well, working as an elementary school teacher.

On June 13, 1998, Jennifer married her

husband, Kevin. The couple had two daughters, Maddie and Callie. Early in their marriage, Jennifer’s husband was diagnosed with cancer. He fought the disease for six years before passing away, leaving Jennifer to raise her two daughters alone. Maddie was in 3rd grade and Callie was in Pre-K when they lost their father in 2011. One year later, Jennifer’s father passed away.

Jennifer admits that it has been hard raising her two daughters alone. But she quickly counters that by championing the incredible support system she has with her family, friends and church, especially her mom.

“My mom is my rock. She is amazing,” says Jennifer.

Six years after losing her husband, Jennifer suffered a debilitating stroke on Feb. 11, 2017. She talks about her recovery from the stroke and what that time meant to her. “The doctors just kept saying, ‘You dodged a huge bullet’.” Jennifer had a massive stroke and would go on to spend three months recovering in Tulsa at St. Francis in the Traumatic Brain Injury Unit. Jennifer did not let the stroke stop her from making the most of life. On the contrary, she says, “That whole experience was just something else for me.

It really made me realize some things are more important than others. The things I thought were important were not important

at all. Having your friends and your family, that’s the most important thing to me.”

Jennifer spent her three months of recovery getting to know the other patients on her floor. While doing her own physical therapy and learning to walk again, Jennifer never missed a moment to lift up those around her. She could often be found in any room but her own, making friends and encouraging other patients during their exercises. She was so effective at motivating other patients, St. Francis offered her a job as a Mentor in the Physical Therapy unit after she was discharged. While a job with that kind of commute wasn’t in the cards for Jennifer, she believes she would have enjoyed it immensely. Each year she celebrates Feb. 11 in honor of having overcome so much.

One of the things that brings Jennifer joy is her job at Peckham School. She works with special needs students and as the secretary for the school. She’s been there since 2007 and says the work is one of the most rewarding things she’s ever done. She tells a story about a student who had suffered a traumatic brain injury. He came to her at the beginning of a school year barely talking.

He didn’t know more than A,B,C and wasn’t counting higher than 5. “By Christmas he was counting to 100, knew all his ABC’s and

COMMUNITY L

First Christian important issue weekly sessions

The topics are p

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Meaning and P

How do we fin happens to the next? When ki

COMMUNITY LEARNING SEMINARS

NOW OPEN oiunr NEW LOCATION! 203 E. Grand

First Christian Church will be offering a series of Community Learning Seminars addressing a number of important issues that many in our community will find interesting. This series will begin in March and will consist of four topics that run in weekly sessions for 2-4 weeks. Each session will last about an hour and is intended for small groups of 8 to 12 people.

The topics will include the following:

Downtown Ponca City

580-304-3773 Live

Auction

Impact of Poverty on Children Generational poverty can have dramatic impact on children’s attitude about life and their future. These sessions promote the understanding of the culture of poverty and the possible responses helpful to these children. These sessions are for those who want to begin learning to help children escape from the shackles of poverty. The first session on this topic is scheduled on Monday, March 20: 4:00- 5:00 pm at First Christian Church.

Meaning and Productivity in Later Life How do we find success, happiness and deep purpose in the second half of life? What makes life meaningful? What happens to the brain as we age? Are you in or approaching the second half of life? Wondering as life changes, what will be next? When kids are gone? How can we continue to be useful? What keeps us vibrant and alive? The first session on this topic is scheduled on Tuesday, March 21: 4:00-5:00 pm at First Christian Church.

Memory and Brain Health How do we strengthen our brain? Why it’s so important and how to keep the brain in good shape. How is memory the key to brain enhancement? Our identity is rooted in our memories and our memories give us a richer sense of ourselves. Shared memories- the memories we share with others- are amazingly important to us and those around us. How do we make the most of these memories? First session to be announced.

Loneliness and Health Connection with others is actually a very healing process, especially in what seems to be a very lonely world. Loneliness has become a public health concern. It affects us, our children, our work and our attitude toward life. Anxiety and depression have some of their deep roots in loneliness. How can we begin to interact with others in a fun and meaningful way? The first session is to be announced.

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These Community Learning Seminars will all be held at First COMMUNITY LEARNING SEMINAR ANNOUNCEMENT Christian Church located at 210 North 5th Street in Ponca

First Christian Church will be offering a series of Community Learning Seminars addressing a number of relevant and City. Attendees should enter the building from the west door. important issues we all re or will be facing. This series will begin in March and will consist of four topics that run in moreEach information and toansign-up attend, please call the8-12 people. weekly sessions for For 2-4 weeks. session will be about hour and to groups are intended to be small-

church office at 580-762-1667.

The topics are planned to be:

Meaning and Productivity in Later Life

How do we find success, happiness and deep purpose in the second half of life. What makes life meaningful? What happens to the brain as we age? Are you in or approaching the second half of life? Wondering when works ends, what's next? When kids are gone? What's next? How can we continue to be useful? What keeps us vibrant and alive?

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SPRAY’S

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FRIDAY • MARCH 3 • 5-9 PM WE CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU! Shop our new Kendra Scott Jewelry, Hobo Handbags & Capri Blue.

Enjoy complimentary food and drinks!

Nomination Submission from Marie Trenary: If there ever was a person who has overcome adversity and continues to be a positive and uplifting person, it is Jennifer Hurley. Jennifer’s husband passed away at a young age, leaving Jennifer to raise their two daughters, Maddie and Callie. Several years later Jennifer suffered a stroke, leaving her dependent on a wheelchair but Jennifer ignores that fact and is the most independent person I have met. She “always” has a smile on her face. Jennifer is a longtime Ponca resident.

Her dad Bill Hicks served as PCHS principal for many years. Jennifer works at the Peckham school and gives 100% every day, sharing her love of learning with her students. Once you meet Jennifer, you will never forget her determination, her smile and her classy style. was talking to his classmates. It was the best thing that I have ever done.

I would leave school every day and I wanted to cry because it made me so happy.”

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MARCH 2023

Jennifer loves greeting the students each morning. She believes a positive interaction at the beginning of each student’s day can profoundly impact the way the rest of their day goes. Jennifer prides herself on bringing that positivity. “I think if you build them up that act of kindness will make their day so much better.”

While this article is meant to paint a picture of someone who’s taken hardship and made the best of it - it also warrants sharing that Jennifer doesn’t live in a make-believe world, where everything is sunshine and rainbows. She’s honest about her setbacks. Her stroke killed about 1/3 of her brain cells (but she’d like to know what your excuse is ). She gets frustrated sometimes and needs to take a moment for a meltdown.

She shares, “I had a total breakdown the other day. But I just have to let that out. Sometimes I think everyone needs to do that. You don’t want to keep it in because that does no good. I’ve learned that this is my life now. I can take it or leave it. I can learn to deal with it or I can just be really angry about it, but anger gets you nowhere. I’ve accepted it and I’m okay with it. I never want anyone to feel sorry for me. Actually, it’s made me a better person. I try to stay positive. And you’ve got to laugh; laughter is so important.”

Jennifer isn’t afraid to feel pain and

frustration, but she doesn’t stay in those emotions. She feels them and then moves on.

We all get to choose what to do with the proverbial lemons of life. Jennifer has chosen not to be a victim. She remembers watching other patients sit in self-pity while she was in the hospital and that’s not for her. She says she can still do the same things she’s always done, she just does them a little differently now.

“You take what you have and you try to make that better.

I don’t take days for granted anymore, that’s for sure.

It’s important to enjoy life because it’s so short and you never know what’s going to happen. I mean, I didn’t think my husband was going to get sick and then pass away. I didn’t think I was going to have a stroke. You just never know. But I try to make the best of everything that’s given to me. That’s all you can do. I’m a very strong, determined person. I think I got that from my dad. He was pretty determined. And I think God gives me strength every day to go on.

I try to help everybody I can. I try to make their day.

I think making people happy is important.”

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Splash into Summer!

Call Today to Schedule your Pool Opening 580-762-3444

We are lucky to be in a position to help the wonderful non-profit organizations doing great things in this community. Ponca City’s future is brighter than ever!

Carl Renfro

Directors Brenda Renfro

President

Randy Renfro

Rich Cantillon

Treasurer, CPA

President Ponca City Chamber/Tourism

Rick Renfro

Secretary, Restaurateur

Jeff Cowan

RCB Bank, Retired

Cindy Gorrell

T.L Walker

Vice President, Investments

Executive Director Standing Bear Foundation

QUALITY POOLS & SPAS

Jerod Helling

115 E. Highland Ave. • Ponca City

We are proud to support Ponca City 501c3 organizations through charitable grants.

RCB Bank, Market President

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This is a proof only and an opportunity to identify any error made during the creation of your advertisement.

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ABC Advertising Agency Inc. shall not be held responsible for any errors not marked, image quality loss, color fluctuations, and/or font legibility.

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Advertiser AUTO INTINTIONS

Date 2018-11-06

To Be Completed By Advertiser Only

580-762-5283 • autointintions.com

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MARCH 2023

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TRIAD

Accepting New Primary Care Patients

COMPLETE HEALTHCARE

Now Serving You in 2 Locations!

400 Fairview, Suite 17

2703 N. 14th Ponca City 580-765-9451

Dr. Patrick Gray’s former office

Original location

Former Patients of Dr. Gray:

10 MARCH 2023

Ponca City 580-762-3696

We would love to provide you the same quality care in the same office. We have your charts and records. Please call the number above to schedule an appointment.

Congratulations!

Congratulations Dr. Patrick Gray on your well-deserved retirement. We appreciate the trust you’ve placed in us to take care of your former patients.

The TRIAD Team MARCH 2023 11

Building Ramps to Freedom Retired Senior Volunteer Program (RSVP) Makes a Difference in Kay County Story by Chelsea McConnell / Staff Writer

All photos provided by Bill Thomason c/o The Ramp Ministry/RSVP.

Imagine for a moment being confined to your home – unable to leave to go to the store, the bank or run other errands essential to everyday life. Imagine being unable to cross the threshold of your home and enter the outside world. Consider how incredibly difficult it would be to feel stuck and isolated all the time. What if all that was needed was a wheelchair ramp? Volunteers from St. Paul’s United Methodist Church started The Ramp Ministry to see to this need in our community.

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RSVP Director Lilly Freeman explains the need for ramps in our community. “People suffering from a disability or mobility issues often find independent living to be complicated and at times it can be impossible given the extent of the disability.”

Not having a ramp could mean the difference between staying in your home and seeking placement at a costly healthcare facility. Ramps make life more feasible for disabled citizens and are crucial to their safety in the event of an emergency. Access to a ramp can also improve quality of life, according to www. payingforseniorcare. com. “Wheelchairbound seniors with easy access to a handicap ramp will likely interact more socially, access social services more and generally age in place more easily. Ramps also serve an important function in emergencies should medical staff need to enter and exit the senior’s home.”

The major obstacle in our community is that many citizens can’t afford to have a ramp installed. One of the goals of RSVP is to help the citizens of Kay County “age in place with safety and dignity.” This goal makes their partnership with the Ramp Ministry a perfect fit.

The Ramp Ministry is granting more freedom in our community one ramp at a time. The Ministry started in 2007 with volunteers from St. Paul’s United Methodist Church and has since partnered with RSVP of Ponca City to make their efforts more effective. The group was led by Burton Casad from

MARCH 2023 13

can mean the whole world to the disabled person who’s stuck inside his/her home.

Ramp costs are an obstacle the team must continue to overcome each year. In 2017 the average cost of materials to build a ramp was $370. In 2022, the cost was $670. Ramp funds are currently procured through individual and team grants from ConocoPhillips and Phillips 66, as well as donations from area foundations, businesses and individuals. If you’re interested in supporting this effort, donations can be made to the RSVP Ramp Fund. The group is grateful for all donations they’ve received to date that allow them to do this much-needed work in our community.

2007-16 and is now led by Bill Thomason.

Over that time, they’ve grown from having 3-5 volunteers to 18 volunteers. These individuals give selflessly of their time and talents to help local citizens.

The group initially got together to rebuild a porch for a citizen in need in 2007. This led to another porch rebuild in 2008 that included a ramp.

In 2009 they partnered with RSVP and began applying for grants in order to build ramps and handrails at no cost to their recipients. For the first several years they built an average of 10 ramps or railings each year. Referrals are made to the group by RSVP, local health agencies and St. Paul’s. Fortunately, as need for ramps has increased, volunteer numbers have increased as well. In 2015 the group built 18 ramps. The number jumped to 28 ramps built in 2016.

Beginning in 2017 and every year since, the volunteer team has built over 50 ramps per year, as well as installed many handrails. Currently the group has built 442 ramps in our community.

That is 442 lives that were changed by this caring group of volunteers.

The majority of the ramps and handrails are built for senior citizens, though the group has built four for school-age youth and six for young adults under 30. Their coverage spans our area with the group having built ramps in Ponca City, Newkirk, Blackwell, Tonkawa, Marland, Kaw City, White Eagle, Red Rock, Burbank and Shidler. Ramps are built with treated lumber, and supplies are purchased locally. The group aims to follow ADA guidelines for ramps as far as slope, width and rail heights are concerned. Through their many years of working together, the team has become more efficient. Equipment has been donated over the years, and a trailer has been fabricated to store everything the team needs. The system they’ve created allows them to be ready to go at the beginning of each week.

Despite growing efficiencies, the team has a backlog of ramps to be built due to the

14 MARCH 2023

outstanding needs in our community. Thomason explains, “We now plan our building by giving first priority to those who cannot leave their home due to inability to negotiate their stairs. This work has been a blessing to our team in that there is a great joy in seeing someone come down the just-finished ramp in their wheelchair or walker to get out of their home on their own for the first time since they lost their mobility.” The group also has five portable ramps donated to them by Joe Dempewolf. These are incredibly helpful as they can be deployed quickly to serve citizens with temporary needs.

One recipient described the ramp built for her as “freedom.” The ramp gave her the freedom to get out of her home, see her family again and become more independent. What can seem like a small thing to someone who is able-bodied,

During their many years of building ramps, this team of volunteers has also been busy building a fellowship with each other. This fellowship is the glue that sustains them. Fred Rogers is famously quoted as reminding us to “Look for the helpers.”

This group is just that – a group of helpers serving our community.

2022 Ramp Team Members are Bill Thomason, Francis Bartley, Brad Blakeburn, Lowry Blakeburn, Ken Cantrell, Robin Drumm, Don Fore, Mike Gaheb, Mike Goodall, Dick Jacobson, Stan Jones, Chris Martens, Darrell Salley, Gary Sibley, Kevin Smith, Cecil Sparks and John Varee. Bill Bridwell was also an active member until his passing this year.

RSVP is a United Way Agency and qualifies for 501(c)(3) tax status. Address is RSVP, 445 Fairview, Ponca City, OK 74601.

Your Future Starts Here!

The University Center provides Higher Ed opportunities to the citizens of Ponca City, and North Central Oklahoma.

Summer enrollment is open for NOC and NWOSU.

Fall enrollment opens for NWOSU March 21 and opens for NOC March 27.

Buying or selling real estate is not a matter of “luck.”

It’s all about choosing the right Realtor.

Give me a call if I can help with your real estate needs.

MARY BETH MOORE 580-401-3456

mbclarkmoore@ yahoo.com

HERITAGE REALTORS® 3216 N. 14th • 580.765.8888

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Taxpayers should bring the following required items with them to the Library:

Free 2022 Income Tax Services Available at the Ponca City Library for Low and Middle-Income Taxpayers of All Ages

IRS-certified AARP Tax-Aide volunteers will be available again this year to prepare and electronically file Federal and Oklahoma income tax returns at the Ponca City Library. The service is free of charge and is available for low- and middleincome taxpayers of all ages. You do not have to be an AARP member to have your taxes prepared.

The volunteer preparers are available beginning Wednesday, Feb. 1, 2023, and ending around April 15, 2023. Appointments are required for all taxpayers. Intake appointment hours are 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. on Wednesday and Thursday of each week.

There also will be additional intake appointments from 9 a.m. until noon on Tuesday of each week. A packet of information will be given to the taxpayer at the library, which includes instructions on what you need to do prior to your intake appointment.

Checkout appointment hours are 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. on each Tuesday.

AUTO/TRUCKING ACCIDENTS

Appointments can be made in person by going to the Reference Desk at the Ponca City Library or by calling the library at 580-767-0345. Masks will not be required, but are recommended this tax season.

The drop-off method of tax preparation will again be used this tax season. After the taxpayer and counselor meet for the intake appointment, all tax records needed to complete the tax return will be kept by the tax counselors and returned to the taxpayer along with completed tax returns at your checkout appointment the following Tuesday.

The volunteers are authorized to prepare most basic returns, making sure that each taxpayer receives all eligible deductions and credits. They are not allowed to prepare returns for taxpayers that have income from rental properties or complicated business returns.

• • •

Copy of 2021 tax return

• •

W-2 from each employer

•

Documentation of health insurance coverage for everyone listed on the tax return.

•

Checkbook or bank document with routing and account numbers, if direct deposit of the refund is desired.

•

Any other documents necessary to complete your 2022 return. For example, cost of stock sold, tuition statements and summary of itemized deductions.

Photo ID (taxpayers) Social Security cards for each person listed on the tax return Documentation from all other forms of income – these include interest, dividends, capital gains, stock sale, cancellation of debt, retirement, selfemployment, Social Security and unemployment compensation.

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(L-R) Rick Daine & Robert Hays standing in front of several of the City of Ponca City’s Solid Waste Truck fleet. Photo by Chelsea McConnell/Staff Writer.

The Grave & Gritty World of Garbage

City of Ponca City – Senior Collectors Story by Chelsea McConnell / Staff Writer

Photos provided by the City of Ponca City

As we rush about our daily lives in the oftenfrenzied pace that has become so common, it’s easy to forget about the things at play making our lives easier and our communities more livable. It’s easy to forget there are humans doing essential work so our lives keep spinning with little interruption. We turn on lights without a second thought to the workers who keep the power on. We drive over smooth roads without a second thought to the employees who paved that road during its last repair. We empty our trash without a second thought to the collectors who risk their lives each day keeping our community clean.

Because it’s human nature to take these things for granted, it is important to educate yourself about what happens behind the scenes.

18 MARCH 2023

Rick Daine and Robert Hays are Senior Collectors with the City of Ponca City’s Solid Waste Department. Daine has been with the City for 30 years and Hays for over 20 years.

What does a Senior Collector do, you might be wondering?

They drive the trash trucks. Both have worked their way up over the years and performed a myriad of jobs within the Solid Waste Department. This makes each of them a wealth of knowledge in their field.

When asked what a normal day looks like, Daine laughs good-naturedly and says, “There is no such thing as a normal day in solid waste.”

A typical day for these two has many variables. Start time is based on available trucks. Days can range from a normal workload to a 15-hour day. The job is hard and reliable help is not a given. Trucks break down and must be fixed. Holidays, summer break and even the pandemic change the nature of trash in our community. During the pandemic, people spent more time at home. While spending more time at home, many took on remodeling projects, did light cleaning or even heavy purging. All of these things generate more trash.

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Residential routes run Monday/ Thursday and Tuesday/Friday. Hays explains the critical nature of the routes. “Everything that’s supposed to be done on Monday has to be done on Monday. We can’t push it off. Because on Tuesday, we’ve got all the Tuesday stuff, so we can’t go back and do Monday.”

Procrastination is not an option.

When asked what they do in the face of this kind of pressure they say they just deal with it. Daine points out they’re “essential services.” They don’t get snow

days. After a holiday when they’re facing multiple times the normal amount of garbage, they just work a longer shift to get it all picked up.

On top of residential garbage, they also empty commercial dumpsters for local businesses.

Each truck has one driver and two loaders. The two loaders are the employees who manually get off and dump the barrels or cans.

Ponca City trash collection is via “manual dump.” Manual dump is faster than automated dumping.

Citizens also have the luxury to get

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“It’s a tough job.”

Hays adds, “But I come back every day loving this job.” know that you’re providing for your family.”

rid of one large item per trash day. This would not be an option with automated trucks. A switch to automated trucks would take so much more time per route that we would have to move to one trash day a week per residence with no extra items able to be dumped.

Daine and Hays both take pride in the work they do. It’s hard work and it’s dangerous work. Few

are cut out to be a garbage man. Hays puts it like this, “You’re either made for this job or you’re not.

It’s a good job. This job will grab you and suck you in. It’s the camaraderie, the hours, the work.

You only have to get along with two other people.

And if you’re having a bad day, you can take your frustrations out on the trash, not the cans. We take care of the cans. And you can go home knowing that you did something that was worthwhile. And

Daine and Hays share about the dangers of garbage that one might not consider. People throw away all manner of things – broken glass, live bullets, household chemicals, lithium batteries, hypodermic needles and other biohazards. Any number of things can become dangerous when crushed by the trash compactor.

On top of what’s in the trash, there’s also the work itself. They’re dumping residential cans on 14th Street between Hartford and Highland and on Pecan between Hartford and Lake Road. The gentlemen tell me if you hear screeching tires, you don’t take a second to look, you jump in the hopper with all the trash. Whatever might be in

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the hopper is a better alternative than being hit by a car. Daine says nonchalantly, “I’ve had people almost take me out before. I mean, it’s just part of the job.” Daine goes on to say, “It’s a tough job.”

Hays adds, “But I come back every day loving this job.”

Both tell stories of how rewarding their work is.

Daine shares, “There are three little girls that come out to the fence almost every time I go through their alley. I get out and talk to them. They go to my church. And that is the highlight of their day.”

Hays adds, “We had a little kid that came out all

the time just because he loved the trash truck.

He brought us out some of his birthday cookies.

Next time we came through, I had a giant toy trash truck that I went to Walmart and got him.

He thought that was the coolest thing.”

When all six residential trucks are up and running, each route hits about 950 houses per day. If trucks are down, that number goes up.

Senior Collectors are required to have their Class B Commercial Driver’s License as well as their Air Brakes License. New Senior Collectors are mentored by more experienced drivers on the ins and outs of driving the trucks and are required to log a set number of hours before

22 MARCH 2023

driving on their own. Residential customers can have up to three 35-gallon containers of trash out on each pick-up day. Our Solid Waste Department picks up residential leaves from November through January. Spring Cleaning happens in either March or April and residents can put out anything they want except for liquids, chemicals, appliances and tires. The Household Hazardous Waste event is held every other year.

Next time you’re taking out your trash, remember the humans who make it disappear. They work incredibly hard, they put their lives at risk on a regular basis, and they deserve our respect.

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Soulful Being:

Let’s Talk Faith and Lent Story and Photos by Marlys Cervantes / Contributing Writer

“Lent comes providentially to awaken us, to shake us from our lethargy.” ~~Pope Francis With Easter fast approaching, the season of Lent is on the minds of many who observe various Christian traditions. Knowing there is crossover among religions in so many areas of faith, I wondered if there was in this particular season of the religious cycle, so I decided to ask some friends on different faith journeys than mine. I love to learn more about other faiths as I continue to grow myself.

Lent is the time period that begins with Ash Wednesday, which is Feb. 22 this year, and leads up to Easter Sunday. Its significance parallels the 40 days Jesus spent fasting in the desert while being tempted by Satan.

This is why many people give up food items during Lent.

Chuck Colson, author and founder of Prison Fellowship, says, “Lent affords us the opportunity to search the depths of

26 MARCH 2023

our own sin and experience the heights of God’s love.”

The Catholic church is the most wellknown for stricter guidelines during the Lenten season, with most meats being forbidden during the week, beginning Ash Wednesday through Holy Thursday.

Today, not eating meat is generally just an observance on the Fridays during Lent. The reasoning of the church for the sacrifice is the biblical stories of Jesus’ 40-day fast told in the books of Matthew, Mark and Luke, which also all outline his temptation.

While other Christian churches do not follow the fasting principles as closely, many still consider this a time of reflection that can also include a sacrifice to parallel that shown in scripture. Pastor Leon Veazey of First United Methodist Church says, “My understanding of the Lenten season is that it is a season for self-reflection, repentance and renewal of confessional faith and sacrificial service. So, I try to focus on giving up something that is either detrimental to my health (spiritual, mental, emotional and/ or physical) and take on something that is beneficial to my life in those aspects. I see it as an equation with two sides to it.”

I love the idea of balance found in Pastor Veazey’s explanation. Some years back, I had what I would consider successful Lenten sacrifices, but looking at them now, they were very superficial in regard to my spiritual being. I remember in graduate school giving up television. Now, had I replaced it with reading devotionals or writing something for my spirit, that might be different, but I had a very logical goal in mind – my Master’s thesis. No television meant a singular focus every evening and weekend on writing and editing that thesis to fruition, and the chunk of time certainly helped. So, success! Not really what I’d consider a spiritual quest, but a success all the same.

In a visit with a Muslim friend of mine, a former student, Lubna Suied, who moved to the United States at 8 years old from Iraq (after living in Syria with her family for two years while waiting for their visas), we discussed the similarities of Lent to the Holy month of Ramadan. Suied is very devout and loves to discuss her faith, so I enjoy our visits greatly.

Suied says, “During this month, Muslims fast from sunrise to sunset to help us get closer with our creator and work on our spiritual connection. This includes extra prayer, extra donations and studying the Quran as much as possible.”

She explained that her understanding is that Lent is a season to help Christians work on increasing their religious acts and stay away from certain temptations while

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practicing self-control, which is similar to Ramadan.

Of course, Suied explained that Muslims don’t celebrate Easter because they do not believe Jesus died on the cross. Instead, the Quran teaches that God raised Jesus to Heaven.

Suied explains, “A lot of people have the wrong idea about Islam when it comes to Jesus and Mohammed. We follow the teaching of Mohammed, and we believe in Jesus. We have stories that teach us about Jesus and Mary. We believe God didn’t allow for the enemies to hurt Jesus, which is why he was sent to God and will return later during the final hours.”

Another person I visited with about this time of the year is Dr. John Michael Sefel, a Jewish friend who can easily trace his ancestry into the concentration camps of the Holocaust. He is one of the most interesting and intelligent people I know. I miss working with him. He is now Professor of Theatre at Henry Ford College in Dearborn, Michigan, after completing his doctorate at Ohio State University. I’ve always enjoyed discussing faith with John.

While he does not celebrate Lent or Easter, Sefel mentioned there are traditions they do have that are relevant during this season, and as always, I love learning from this man.

Sefel explains that Pesach, also known as Passover, often overlaps with Good Friday and Easter, and that what many Christians refer to as the Last Supper was actually a Passover Seder. Furthermore, the reason the Catholic communion “bread” is unleavened is a Passover tradition based on a “prohibition of ‘risen’ bread in recognition of God’s miracles allowing the Exodus from Egypt, with the story that the Jews fled so quickly that they didn’t have time to allow their bread to rise, leaving them with only something approximating the matzo crackers we have now.” Passover and Good Friday are eternally linked.

I love seeing how faiths are intermingled in different ways, and one of the most interesting to me has been realizing that Buddhism is more of a way of life than a religion. My friend Britton Gildersleeve, a writer and now retired Oklahoma State University professor living in Virginia, used to blog on BuddhismforBelief. net. She says, “I would describe Buddhism as more an approach to life than a true ‘faith.’ There is no belief that the Buddha was a god. In fact, the appeal of the Buddhist path is that a human took it and achieved enlightenment.”

Gildersleeve has a vast experience with various religions from growing up and living in numerous countries

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Pastor Leon Veazey of First United Methodist Church says, “My understanding of the Lenten season is that it is a season for self-reflection, repentance and renewal of confessional faith and sacrificial service.

So, I try to focus on giving up something that is either detrimental to my health (spiritual, mental, emotional and/or physical) and take on something that is beneficial to my life in those aspects. I see it as an equation with two sides to it.”

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and allowing herself to truly experience the differences: “We all [her and her three sisters] were raised in an ecumenical Christian home, but also overseas, where Buddhism, Catholicism, Judaism, Islam and more were common among our friends and their families. I went to Jewish temple, to Buddhist temple, fed the monks each morning, took catechism with a girlfriend and celebrated Tết, as well as several other holidays that are almost certainly remnants of very early belief systems.”

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Gildersleeve finds the “congruencies between Muslim Ramadan and Christian Lent fascinating,” and she does practice Lent as far as giving up something important to her, such as social media, which is how she communicates with friends and family from across the globe, even though she does not believe Christianity is the only way to an afterlife (she admits to remaining agnostic on that point).

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When even my Buddhist friend with agnostic leanings in some areas of faith gives up important items for Lent and focuses on looking inward, it might mean I should consider something more substantial. I still love the idea of balance posed by Pastor Veasey. One year I took on the idea of doing something rather than sacrificing, and it was my only other productive time of Lent.

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However, this year, I believe I’m going to go with the idea of balance – a sacrifice and a commitment. Pastor Veazey says, “I will give up those diet sodas and give the money I saved to the Circle of Care initiate of the First United Methodist Church.” He is also giving up lunch on Wednesdays and Fridays, and using the time to read books to his son that a church member had given him. Balance.

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ANSWER ON PAGE 62

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Will you sacrifice anything this year? Take on a commitment that is new and rejuvenating to your spirit? At the writing of this, I’m still deciding, but these individuals of all different faith walks and beliefs have given me inspiration in my own. I love my friends, I love my life, and I look forward to this journey – whatever it may bring.

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Texas-based author and inspirational speaker Wendy Speake, explains of Lent, “Exchange what can never satisfy you for the only thing that can.”

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When trying to decide on something to give up, I realized that I always posted where we were eating, or what theatre production we were attending, and so on. Then, I thought, what a positive statement it would be if I posted worship. So, instead of giving up something, Lent was a time I instead posted when I was at worship service or other activities at church. It was a way to show that side of Me without any

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lecture or preaching to anyone, just a social media message. This is the one Lent promise I made that has stuck. I still do this today, and it was made several years ago.

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Backyard

Gardener

Seed Starting and Interplanting Story and Photos by Kat Long / Contributing Writer As we head into seed starting season, allow me to give you some more things to think about when starting those seeds: planning the plant partners. Known as interplanting, intercropping or companion planting, plant partners are plants that historically and scientifically have been proven to work together to grow better crops, keep pests at bay or compliment each other in some fashion. When seed starting, keep some of these combinations in mind.

Garlic, Basil and Tomatoes If you planted garlic in the fall, wander out to that plot and see how much space you have.

Starting tomatoes and basil seeds now inside will give you sturdy plants to put out in the garlic patch in late April. If you don’t have garlic in the ground, consider interplanting some carrots after you get the basil and tomatoes in the ground.

Just as garlic needs more space underground, carrots serve the same purpose. Basil masks the smell of those wonderful tomato plants and keeps the tomato hornworms away. Carrot tops and garlic tops do the same with their strong aromas. Interplanting basil, marigolds and borage can benefit gardeners by repelling flies and mosquitoes while also attracting pollinators and beneficial insects such as the parasitic braconid wasp, a natural predator of tomato hornworms.

Another note on borage and marigolds. Borage grows about two feet tall, has edible blue, starlike flowers, can be used as mulch when the flowers die off and reseeds itself.

And well, marigolds are great border flowers and their strong smell repels insects. If you are dealing with deer snacking on your produce, marigolds assist with masking all those yummy garden smells.

30 MARCH 2023

Radishes Radishes are a love them or leave them crop.

I love them and enjoy planting them in late March and April because they can stand a short cold spurt and mature quickly. Great pickled if you cannot handle their peppery flavor raw, radishes are a great companion plant for lettuces, tomatoes and peppers and do well in the herb garden alongside dill, mint and oregano. Radish plants can handle pests like flea beetles and aphids much better than immature tomato and pepper plants. And if you don’t want to spray your garden and harm beneficial insects, your ladybug babies will find those aphids and make short work of them. Gotta keep those beneficial bugs happy so they stick around.

Seed Starting vs. Straight Sowing Please don’t beat yourself up if you haven’t started seeds yet when you are reading this. No worries.

You can buy a couple of tomato and pepper plants to put in the yard after the first freeze. No, you won’t know what kind of seeds they were or what soil they were grown in. But hey, they will be yours to manage and grow until those tomatoes/ peppers start putting on. If you have started your seeds or are still wanting to get a jumpstart on growing season, the best seeds to start inside are your tomatoes, peppers, cucumbers and watermelons. All these need a longer time to mature and will be ready for standing up to hardening off in late April and getting into the ground in May.

shade cloth or investing in a little greenhouse pup tent to protect your early sow crops.

Planting New Stuff

Straight sowing is putting your seeds in the ground or germinating them for a couple of days and then putting them into the ground.

Your lettuces, greens, broccoli, cauliflower, peas, carrots and herbs can be put into the ground in late March to late April. They will need extra care and coverage if we get a hard late frost, but the nice thing about these varieties is they like the cold. Not ice so much, but cold is OK. Think about DIY groundcovers with buckets, sheets,

This is your permission slip to plant something new: something exotic or different that you are not sure about. This is also a warning: do not beat yourself up if the planting is a failure. That is OK. Failure is not the bad thing; not trying something is the bad thing. Take the risk; plant the seed; grow the plant. Learn something. It will expand your horizons and make you a better person. One year I planted Asian noodle beans on a whim.

They grew all summer long and were so yummy in stir fry. Haven’t been able to grow them since, but it was a good year that year.

Flowers Plant the flowers. Perennials, annuals, shade or sun, interplanting flowers to draw in those pollinators will give you amazing eye-candy in your yard. I love my sunflowers, but due to how my house sits, I will not be able to have the really tall sunnies this year by the road. Going to try some mammoth seeds on the south side of the house and see what happens. I’ll report back.

Great flowers for shade are pansies, milkweed, columbine, primroses and lamium (groundcover).

For the sunny spots, Mexican sunflowers, bachelor buttons, bee balm, lemon balm and, of course, sunflowers.

Seed Swap Yes, we are planning a seed swap this year. And much earlier than usual on Sat., March 18. Bring your seeds to swap, your lists to find or just come and chat with us hanging out at City Central, 400 E. Central Avenue, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. We will be sorting seeds, starting seeds and just basically geeking out over gardening stuff. Would love to have you stop in.

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Story by Everett Brazil, III / Staff Writer Photography by Jes McIntosh / Photography by Jes

Ponca City Main Street’s “5 Under 40 Awards”

recognizes young leaders from the Ponca City area who demonstrate significant contributions to this community through their role in their business, community involvement, volunteer work, leadership ability, advocacy, and influence. PCMS board member Rhonda Skrapke suggested the award idea and the board agreed the young people deserve the ovation.

Nominations were promoted through the PCMS social media platforms with applications accepted through the organization’s website.

Nominees were required to fill out the applications to be considered.

The applications were sent to judges from outside of Ponca City “so they

would be scored without bias,” Maci Graves, Executive Director of Ponca City Main Street adds.

The five winners will receive a trophy and bottle of champagne from PCMS as well as being featured as the cover story for the March issue of Ponca City Monthly.

MARCH 2023 33

5

It takes a special person to be able to teach our youngest generations in the classroom, someone who has the unique ability to reach out and connect with kids on their level to help them learn and grow into members of society. For Ponca City teacher and administrator Brandie Choate, the superintendent and principal of McCord School, she is not

only seeing her kids grow, but she is also bringing the parents in and promoting the school any way she can.

Choate previously served as a teacher at McCord School and Union Elementary School (UES) in Ponca City. She was assistant principal at Newkirk Elementary School under Pam Hunter from 2019-21, and when Hunter retired, she led the school as principal for the 2021-22 school year.

She returned home to McCord as principal and superintendent for the current school year.

“My job as the superintendent at McCord School is to ensure all students have the opportunity to learn and grow in a safe environment,” she said. “Our school strives to have high academic and behavioral expectations for all students, and we pride ourselves on our ability to meet the needs of our kids.”

She does that by watching and listening to the students, finding ways to make connections to not only improve the school for the students while providing a safe environment, but also reaching out to the community.

34 MARCH 2023

“One area I have already begun to make improvements on is our parental involvement.

Research shows that parental involvement has a positive impact on student learning,” she said.

The past fall semester, they held a movie night, with many families taking part in the showing. She also started a program to foster kindness and love in the students by not only recognizing them for those efforts, but calling their parents to let them know their actions.

She also seeks to reach out to the parents themselves, as she believes school also takes place at home.

“I am also active with our parent teacher organization. I am always looking for opportunities to make connections between home and school to strengthen student achievement,” she said.

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Her efforts pour out of the front doors of McCord School and into the larger community, educating many more students outside the school walls. She coached soccer teams of all ages from 2014-21 and served on the Soccer Board of Directors from 2018-21, including as vice president her final year.

Her efforts haven’t gone unnoticed, either.

Ponca City Public Schools named her the “Teacher of the Year” while she was at UES, and she was named the Masonic Fraternity of Oklahoma “Teacher of Today,” both in 2016.

She is also active with many other organizations that promote McCord including as a board member of the Osage County Interlocal Cooperative and a committee member for the McCord Basketball Program, a member of the Oklahoma Association of School Administrators and Oklahoma Association of Elementary School Principals, and as a past participant in the Principal

“As a member of the board of directors during the COVID-19 years, I helped create protocols and procedures to keep coaches and athletes safe,” she said.

She assisted the Ponca City High School band in 2016-19, and during that same time, helped with Ponca City Development Authority’s “Girl Power” summer camp, helping in the education of young women in STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Mathematics) concepts and further developing the program.

She also helped with student exchange education, bringing German, Italian and Norwegian cultures to Kay County. She even hosted a German foreign exchange student at Newkirk High School for the 2021-22 school year.

As for Choate, it’s all part of her job as an educator, and she is simply happy to be back at a school that taught her so much in her youth.

“I was a student at McCord from third-sixth grade, so becoming the superintendent is a very fullcircle moment for me,” she said.

“I love the family atmosphere at McCord, and the pride everyone takes in our small country school!”

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Brooke Jones is a friendly face at the facility, helping

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regularly, but she is also part owner, and takes pride in

her work, helping her customers with whatever they may need.

She is also active in the larger community, and not just Ponca City, but also Newkirk and Blackwell, all in an effort to improve Kay County and make it a great place to live and work.

Jones began her career at Redlands Office Solutions almost a decade ago, and throughout the entire time, she has thought of it as her very own l project.

“I began with our organization in 2014, and every day since joining the team, I have treated the operation like it was my own,” she said. “This past year, I was rewarded for my dedication by being awarded a stake in Redlands as a partner.”

Jones received the honor, at least in part, for going above and beyond for their business partners and maximizing customer service.

“One thing I pride myself on is always looking for more efficient and creative ways to support our growth and exceed our customers’ expectations,” she said. “It has been imperative that I attend training, education opportunities and seminars to be able to enhance our knowledge base to stay ahead of the everchanging retail market and challenges of running a small business.”

Customer service is not her only strength, however, as she also believes in community service as well, and spends countless hours to make Kay County a better place to live, work and play.

MARCH 2023 37

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Redlands Office Solutions is a member of the Ponca City Chamber of Commerce, and she also participates in many events with the business, which also includes Ponca City Main Street (PCMS) functions.

Jones herself is also an active Chamber participant, including the Ambassador Committee and Business Council, both going back to July 2020.

“I attend ribbon cuttings to show support to new local businesses and help recruit new membership by being an advocate for the Chamber,” she said. “I (also) attend cash mobs to show support to active Chamber members and attend the Business of the Month presentations, which I also help nominate monthly.”

Since July 2021, she has served as the Board director and Program chair for the Ponca City Rotary Club.

“As Program chair, I organize for speakers to come to our weekly noon meetings every Monday,” she said. “I helped orchestrate a ‘Til Death do us Party’ fundraiser that raised nearly $1,000, and designed flyers for it in October 2022.”

Additionally, she is the University Center Foundation Board director and treasurer, helping organize donor receptions and a shadowing

Outside of Redlands and the Chamber, she has logged many hours of volunteer time on her own. In 2021, she worked with the Cherokee Strip Golf Classic, which benefits the Opportunity Center, and Oktoberfest for the Marland Estate Foundation. In 2022, she was a part of the Adopt a Park Day cleanup (a special event of the Chamber’s Kindness Campaign) and the Party at the Palace and Santa Bucks Giveaway.

If you are interested in advertising your business, organization or an event in Ponca City Monthly Magazine, call or email me for more information… Robyn Ryan 580-761-1295 • robyn@poncacitymonthly.com

Board member for Ponca City Leadership Class of 2023 at Golden Villa Adult Day Services.

Outside of Ponca City, as part of Redlands Office Supplies, she helped to secure the September 2022 Blackwell Chamber Business of the Month.

She was a participant of the Leadership Newkirk Class of 2022 and helped organize a ‘Fun Run’ for Charlie Adams Day, also in Newkirk.

Whether at Redlands Office Solutions, Ponca City Chamber or the many other organizations she supports, for Jones, she is simply happy to promote the Ponca City, and Kay County communities.

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y c n a N y e f f a L Completely Quilted has been a staple of the downtown craft community for more than a decade. Nancy Laffey’s family brings a love of crafting and quilts to not just Ponca City, but also quilters across the state. Nancy has successfully integrated her love of community with her passion for quilting, which has been a great benefit to all.

Nancy attended Oklahoma State University, where she earned an Associate of Applied Science degree in Culinary Arts and Food Service.

However, for the past 15 years, Nancy has been devoted to her family’s growing business.

They started small but would eventually grow into a shop on Grand Avenue that would be active in the Chamber the entire time.

“We began as a craft business in my mother’s home and expanded after purchasing the building at 315 E. Grand Ave.,” she said. “After creating our family partnership, I grew the business through events and marketing.”

It has expanded greatly, with word of the shop spreading beyond the Ponca City community.

“We were featured as a Top 10 quilt shop in

40 MARCH 2023

Better Homes & Gardens’ Quilt Sample magazine in 2018, a huge honor and tribute to the success of our small business,” she said.

They have found creative ways to expand, including offering beginner classes to adults and children, as well as live sales and videos, which have kept them profitable every year.

They have also seen increased sales from a form of quilt tourism.

“We participate every year in a statewide quilter’s tourism program that sees hundreds of quilting tourists come through Ponca City, just to get a stamp in the passport in our store,” she said. “Many buses have also been routed through Ponca City on special tours just for shopping in our quilt store, as well.”

They have received recognition for their efforts as a local business,

including on a national scale.

“I am a member of the Road to Oklahoma Shop Hop and was part of the group growing from 12 shops to 24 shops,” she said. “Our BERNINA dealership has been named an Excellence Dealer for the past 15 years in a row.”

Completely Quilted doesn’t just receive support from the community, they give it back as well, including making donations to community activities.

“We always keep a stack of quilts and

handmade items that are given for these organizations to be able to raise money,” she said. “We contribute the most through our volunteer efforts, and by using our leadership skills to make Ponca City a great place to live and work.”

Laffey herself is actively involved in the community, including being the chairperson of the Ponca City Development Authority since 2015. She was also the youngest member of the Ponca City Board of Commissioners from 2015-18 and vice mayor in 2018.

She served on the Board of Directors for the New Emergency Resource Agency from 2019-21, and her work as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) has also been rewarding.

“I enjoyed being a CASA, one of those who advocate for children in the child deprived court system,” she said. “Through my training as a CASA volunteer and the time in leadership serving on the board, I was so blessed to have a greater understanding of the needs of children and families in our community.”

She has also been involved in Ponca City Leadership, and Ponca City Main Street, where she chaired the Promotions Committee, and in 2012, was named Board Member of the Year.

Through it all, it is about giving back to the community, whether through Completely Quilted or personally, to make Ponca City a better place.

“I attribute all of our success to the love we have for our family, for creating beautiful quilts and for the amazing support of our staff and customers in trusting us to provide them with a wonderful experience,” she said.

She added that through her work, she was able to adopt two children into her own family.

MARCH 2023 41

l e Nondez e l e M

El Patio and Los Portales are staples of Ponca City’s restaurant community, locally owned food establishments renowned for their traditional Mexican cuisine. The Melendez family has poured so much heart and soul into the business that they have been able to expand outside the confines of Ponca City, and under the leadership of Noel Melendez, they are not only looking forward to the future, but benefiting the Ponca City business community at the same time.

Melendez has been a part of that family tradition for more than a decade.

“I have contributed to the growth and success of our family-owned restaurants by taking a leading role right after high school,” he said.

The strong success of the businesses comes from humble beginnings in the Melendez’s native Mexico, which he has fond memories of today.

42 MARCH 2023

“Growing up in rural Mexico, we didn’t have electricity or running water. Some of my best memories were using a car battery to power our TV,” he said, adding that they would turn the TV off during commercials to protect battery life.

“We didn’t have much, but we were happy. These precious life experiences have made me appreciate and be truly grateful for everything I have, never taking anything for granted.”

Today, however, they are looking toward the future of the restaurant business and bringing in new technologies for continued success.

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“During these last 13 years, I have made sure to stay on top of the current market trends, including integrating new technology that’s allowed me to work remotely and focus more on company growth behind the scenes,” he said. “In order to be innovative and grow, I believe it is important to take risks and not be led by fear.”

They have seen growth, opening four additional restaurants across the state, along with a coming facility in Enid.

As for the expansion itself, Melendez is part of that process, too.

“Through the years of opening new restaurants I have had to ‘wear many hats’ and learn the basics of many trades,” he said. “While managing construction projects, I work with trade professionals, such as engineers, architects, electricians, carpenters, etc., and my growth and success is also their growth and success.”

El Patio’s and Los Portales’ support of the community goes much deeper than that, including donating to local youth events, as well as sponsoring many events community-wide, he said. They also provide employment opportunities to locals looking for a job.

He has also stretched out into other segments of the business industry, specifically remodeling the Busy B Arena, turning it into an event center for the community.

Melendez, is personally involved in the business community of Ponca City, helping promote other businesses in the area.

“I am currently a Ponca City Chamber of Commerce board member, giving my time and expertise as a local business owner to support the mission of

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He still maintains strong ties to Mexico today to preserve family heritage.

“Something most people don’t know is I grow agave in Mexico,” he said. “This helps me keep close ties with my cultural roots.”

Even with a growing family business, the Melendez family remain humble about their success, attributing it to the support of the community.

“We take pride in our restaurants and continually strive to be a top dining choice for Ponca,” he said. “I believe El Patio and Los Portales are more than just local restaurants; we are considered home to many of our locals.”

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L E H C A R T R A W E T S

Tucked away in the industrial sector of First Street, south of Grand Avenue and downtown, lies a largely nondescript building, KR Automation. Relatively new to the community, they are a facility that refurbishes factory parts and equipment for resale to facilities that need those parts. While most of those parts affect factories outside Ponca City and Kay County, the Stewarts, specifically, Rachel Stewart, pour that love right back into the community, all in a love of Ponca City.

Rachel operates KR Automation with her husband, Kyle. It started in humble beginnings in their home, located in Osage County.

“My husband and I started KR Automation in September of 2012 out of our spare room,” she said.

“We moved into our small garage, finally rented a small shop and have grown into two locations of over 40,000 square feet, and currently employ nine people,” she said.

While Kyle operates the physical side of the company, hunting the parts they eventually sell to the industrial community, she runs the finances, the money behind the business, along with a side project, running more than 10 rental properties in Kay and Osage counties, known as KR Investment Properties, LLC.

46 MARCH 2023

Her biggest business venture is KR Automation. Started after a business initiative in her own family, today, they approach factories and other industrial facilities that are closing, and buy parts to refurbish for facilities that can use them.

Whether operating a business in Ponca City, or being from the community, it is in their blood to support their local community.

“My husband and I were both born in Ponca City and have lived here all our lives, so supporting the community we live in, and the place our children live, is very important to us,” she said.

Together, they are instrumental in supporting the community.

“We have been long-time supporters of the Ponca City Main Street Program,

was co-chair of this committee for approximately three years.”

in 2016. She also completed the Fire Academy Program in 2016.

“During my tenure as board member and president, I was involved in most all of the events and functions of the organization,” she said.

“Attending these programs not only allowed me to be further educated on our city, local and state governments, and city departments, it allowed me to become a bigger advocate for the community,” she said.

During Rachel’s time with the Marland Estate Foundation, she also helped with the Marland Gala. As chairperson of the Marland Gala in 2018, they raised record-breaking funds.

as well as being a sponsor for their recent project, ‘Ice on the Plaza,’” she said. “We are top sponsors for our local City Arts organization.

We annually donate to Marland’s Place, The Opportunity Center, Survivors Resource Network and the Humane Society.”

Rachel has immersed herself into community involvement. That includes Main Street, as previously mentioned, where she was placed on a committee to help make events happen.

“I have been a Promotions committee member for Ponca City Main Street since 2010, helping organize around five events a year,” she said. “I

“This event raised over $50,000, and was the highest-attended gala to date,” she said. “The proceeds of this fundraising event went directly to the Marland Estate Foundation, whose purpose is to revitalize the Marland Mansion grounds and estate.”

She was also on the United Way Board for about a year, serving on the Allocations committee.

“During this time, I visited with local nonprofit organizations who received funding from United Way and helped ensure they were receiving adequate amounts and are fulfilling their obligations to receive said monies,” she said.

Additionally, she completed Leadership Ponca City in 2010 and the Citizen’s Police Academy

All-in-all, she is happy play a part in advocating for her community, whether through her family business or simply believing in a small town.

“I was approached by the editor of our local magazine to write an article in the magazine, and have been writing that for around two and a half years,” she said. “I was also approached to host a local video segment, called ‘What’s Happening in Ponca City,’ sponsored by Ponca City Tourism. I collect all events that are happening locally, write a script and film monthly!”

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OF THE Mixed by Jill Rowe/Staff Writer

Why Didn’t Anyone Tell Me About Ranch Water?

Recently, I was bartending for a group of people I would characterize as a younger crowd at a private event. They all wanted one thing, Ranch Water. I’ve been serving vodka and gin with soda and lime for years, but this combo seemed like a new fad. It’s not difficult to make, but I was curious about its origin.

Has Ranch Water always existed, or have I been living under a rock? It’s true mixing liquor with soda and citrus is not a new concept. A trend gains popularity for a reason, and I wanted to get to the root of the source.

Although tequila and soda have long been a Texas staple, one name and place kept popping up in my research. Ranch Water is believed to have first been brought to life in West Texas. Kevin Williamson, the proprietor of Ranch 616 in Austin, is credited with the creation of this signature name and mixture. Williamson grew up in the South and

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spent a lot of time as a child hunting with his father along the Texas-Mexico border. Before he probably should have, and against typical hunting protocol, he would embark on day-long hunts with an icy thermos full of tequila and ice. He noticed that as the ice melted, the flavor of the tequila changed.

In the 90s, Williamson came up with his version of Ranch Water when he casually topped off his glass with mineral water as his margarita depleted. He played about with the recipe, substituting an oaky reposado for the silver tequila and adding a full ounce of fresh lime juice and a splash of orange liqueur. To allow customers to choose the strength of their drink, he serves his version with a full glass bottle of the essential Topo Chico on the side.

Can the Topo Chico be substituted for another mineral water? Purists will tell you no. Bottled near Monterrey, Mexico, since 1895, Topo Chico has built up a loyal following in Texas because of the state’s close culinary ties to Mexico. Legend says that an Aztec King discovered Topo Chico when seeking a cure for the mysterious illness ailing his daughter.

She was carried hundreds of miles to the spring. After drinking and bathing in the water, she experienced a miraculous recovery.

Given the basic ingredients, it is likely that bartenders have been preparing variations of the Ranch Water since the heyday of swinging saloon doors. So, it’s probable that the cocktail evolved naturally because of home bartenders and thirsty townspeople. The Ranch Water craze is still going strong as more canned varieties flood the grocery and liquor store shelves. The beauty of Ranch Water is its simplicity.

When the air starts to warm up in the spring, remember that liquid relief is right around the corner.

MARCH 2023 49

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by Patrick Jordan

ACROSS 1. Casts a ballot 6. Blow the mind of 11. Salty body of water 14. No longer together 15. Deals well with problems 16. Breakfast meat 17. Images on St. Patrick's Day decorations 19. Poisonous snake of Egypt 20. Intense anger 21. Rhyme writer 22. Television awards 24. Mom's mate 25. Letters meaning "Send help!"

26. Doomed person 28. Spinning toy 29. Plow-pulling farm vehicles 32. Its capital is Tokyo 35. "Almost, but not ___" 36. Baseball player's hat 37. Stench 38. Goes to the left or right 39. Pod vegetable in Cajun recipes 40. Dracula can become one 41. Enjoys a leisurely bath 42. Valentine flowers 43. Covers with onions, as a steak 45. Drink like a dog does 46. Lavish banquet 47. Occupy a chair 48. Not many 51. Trimmed the grass along a sidewalk 53. Sneaker or loafer 54. Chicken ___ king (2 wds.)

55. Nat ___ Wild (cable channel) 56. Image on St. Patrick's Day decorations (2 wds.)

50 MARCH 2023

60. Guy's square dance partner 61. Itching to get started 62. Kindergartener's glue 63. Advanced in years 64. ___ Island (New England state) 65. Selfish person's trait DOWN 1. Still in effect, as a coupon 2. The Phantom's haunt, on Broadway 3. Sealed with a sticky strip 4. Goof up 5. Squashes underfoot (2 wds.)

6. Nagging pains 7. Ditch around a castle 8. "The Simpsons" store owner 9. Meditative branch of Buddhism 10. Word on some perfume bottles 11. Images on St. Patrick's Day decorations 12. Uncomplicated 13. Rock concert speakers, for short 18. Building with chicken roosts 23. Had a first encounter with 26. Smiles 27. Cheerios grains 28. Goop used in paving roads 29. Residents of Ankara's country 30. Seldom seen 31. They offer massages and mud baths 32. Occupations 33. Garden of Eden resident 34. Image on St. Patrick's Day decorations (3 wds.)

35. Milk quantity 38. Wriggling foot parts 39. Alley ___ (comics caveman) 41. Better at blocking sunlight 42. OK for most movie audiences (2 wds.)

44. Golf ball holder 45. Zebra hunter

1

It is helpful to understand that the amount of sleep humans need is individual and depends on factors such as age and genetics.

For example, studies have shown three genes that allow someone to function adequately on less than 6 hours of sleep. These genes are the NPSR1, DEC2 and ADRB1.

However, only a very small minority of the population carries these.

Furthermore, the NPSR1 gene is especially rare and only found in 1 in 4,000,000 people. Therefore, the odds are that you won’t be able to consistently function in top shape on such little sleep.

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This is the transitional period of light or drowsy sleep. Your muscles are still active, and your body sends signals to slow down your heartbeat, breathing and brain waves.

2. NREM2 This period is shown to not only slow your heartbeat and breathing but also relax your muscles. Your eye movement

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1. NREM1

Now, onto why the golden rule of sleep exists. There are two

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physiological states of sleep – NREM (non-rapid eye movement – N1, N2, N3) and REM (rapid eye movement).

We sleep in cycles, of which there are four.

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47. Divide with others 48. True or ___ (test type) 49. Make extremely happy 50. Conducted, as war 51. Frozen waffle brand

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52. Pass out cards 53. Kid's slider on snowy slopes 57. Cheerleading syllable 58. Conceitedness 59. Way away from here

Z 4. REM This cycle stands for rapid eye movement.

Here, we consolidate new memories, homeostasis is suspended, brain waves are sped up and dreams are experienced.

EM 2, nt).

stops, and you become gradually harder to awaken.

3. NREM3 In this slow-wave sleep, your brain waves decelerate, bringing you

into a deep sleep. This is said to be the most restful phase of sleep as you become unresponsive to environmental stimuli.

Experiences such as night terrors and sleep walking are known to occur here.

All four of these sleep intervals are said to last 90120 minutes as they repeat.

All my math wizards have already concluded that this equals 360-480 minutes altogether. Divide each of those numbers by 60 minutes (one hour), and we see that completing all four of these cycles should require between 6 and 8 hours of sleep. Cool side fact: NREM is where our supply of ATP (energy transport) is restored and HGH (growth hormone) is secreted!

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With all of that said, here is one of the most important takeaways. Every individual is complex, and all bodily processes and functions will not work the same way for us all. Some of us may need 7 hours of slumber while others may need more. You don’t have to follow someone else’s sleep trend or force yourself to run on 7 hours because that’s all you “should” need. I understand we have jobs and deadlines, but we will benefit greatly by finding, prioritizing, planning and executing our individual sleep need every single time we are able.

Countless aspects of your internal state, physical state and general life begin to thrive to an even greater degree with adequate sleep. Wishing you all the best. Happy March everyone!

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CRUSH OODCRUSH FFOOD Story By Amy DeWitt Geurin/Contributing Writer Photo By Bachman Family Farms

Locally grown and sourced food is unlike anything else. It’s cleaner. It’s fresher. It’s more flavorful. Farm-totable is a buzz phrase for restaurants and grocers alike, but there is truth to its meaning. Sourcing food from its origin is the way to go. Bachman Family Farms in Deer Creek is raising grass-fed beef and pasture chickens from the ground up, paying attention to everything from the soil to the sunlight. They aren’t cutting corners, and it’s making a huge difference.

Bachman Family Farm is located in Deer Creek, Oklahoma.

580.440.0270

Check out Bachman’s selection, story and more at www.bachmanfamilyfarms.com

Follow Bachman’s on Facebook and on IG @bachmanfamilyfarms

Operated by David and Amy Bachman, this small farm is delivering the best beef direct to any doorstep in the lower 48 states. The variety of cuts available to order is impressive.

There are the usual cuts that most carnivores are familiar with, but don’t look past the not-so-easy-to-find products. Marrow bones, oxtail, even primal ground beef (70% grind/30%

organ meat) are available.

The tomahawk ribeye is Bachman’s specialty. It is rich and buttery and unbelievably tender. It’s an impressive steak, well marbled and dry aged. Personally, we like to put extra virgin olive oil on all sides and season with a generous amount of salt. Throw it on a screaming hot grill for 5 minutes on each side to put a hard sear on the steak. Put it on a baking sheet in a 300 F oven until the internal temp is ~135 F. *Note: this is for medium rare. If you prefer your temperature elsewhere, adjust accordingly*. Let the meat rest for a minimum of 10 minutes. Slice and enjoy with a bottle of good Cabernet.

Maybe the most overlooked and taken for granted item is ground beef. It’s on the low end of the price range compared to almost any cut, and it’s readily available in most parts of this country. It’s so convenient that it’s taken for granted and subpar grind is commonly accepted.

Bachman’s grind is juicy and rich. It’s the perfect balance of a sweet, savory flavor mixed with salty fattiness. That sounds like a lot, and it is … in the very best way. The way to go is 80/20.

It is THE choice for burgers – the only choice.

Bachman’s also has superior pastureraised chicken. It is leaner and more robust than supermarket chicken.

Supermarket chicken is almost watery, and chicken isn’t supposed to be tasteless. Bachman’s chicken is hearty, and it absorbs spices/brine/ seasonings more easily than grocery store chicken. Chicken breast may

be the most popular cut, but the very best cut is the thigh. It’s a fattier cut, which makes it more flavor intensive.

Does more fat equal more calories?

Sure, but life is meant to be enjoyed, and chicken thighs are meant to be eaten.

The variety, accessibility and the way the animals are raised doesn’t matter if the flavor isn’t there. No doubt, Bachman’s is better. Local, small farm meat > industrial-raised meat all day, every day. Happy eating!!

If You Find Yourself In …

FORT WORTH and you’re looking for interesting meat, go to Lonesome Dove Bistro in the Stockyards and grab a seat at the bar. Order the Jalapeno Cucumber Margarita. Start with the Rabbit-Rattlesnake Sausage (trust me). Order the Roasted Garlic Stuffed Beef Tenderloin with a side of LD Mac & Cheese. The tenderloin comes with hash and grilled asparagus. Order the mac & cheese anyway. Finish with a Jalapeno Cucumber Margarita. Yes. It’s so good, you’ll want two.

TOP THREE FOR ME The chicken thighs. Google Bon Appetit’s Pepperoncini Chicken recipe and get to cooking.

Order online and have top-quality meat delivered right to your door.

The bones (beef and chicken) are fantastic for making homemade broth.

For more delicious food fun, check out @foodcrushok on IG and Facebook and www.foodcrushok.com

52 MARCH 2023

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54 MARCH 2023

BOOK REVIEW Review by Lorrie Layton

PROVIDED BY BRACE BOOKS & MORE

Odder

BY KATHERINE APPLEGATE Odder, a three-year-old sea otter, is the Queen of Play. She takes plain old swimming and diving to a new aquatic-acrobatic level!

She dive-bombs, twirls and excels at triple doughnuts.

Odder learned how to be an otter at “Highwater” – humans call it the Monterey Bay Aquarium – after she was separated from her mother during a mighty storm. Once the humans had taught her everything they knew about how to be an otter – humans call it “Otter 101” – she was released back into Monterey Bay to live with other sea otters.

Her best friend is Kairi, a five-year-old otter who is sensible and wary. They play, eat, dance and sunbathe together. One day the two friends are searching for something to eat when they encounter a teenage shark who mistakes them for a yummy snack. (Sharks think otters taste yucky – they’re just bones and fur without any blubber.) Of course, by the time the shark realizes his mistake, it might be too late for the otters.

Luckily, Odder is rescued – again – by the humans of Highwater who will do their best to help her heal.

Odder is a novel-in-verse. A novelin-verse is a type of hybrid. It has the length and structure of a novel, while taking advantage of the

expressive freedom of poetry. I often tell my students (especially those who insist they don’t like to read) that there’s a lot of white on the pages, so there’s not nearly so much reading required. It’s truly a lovely form of narrative.

Applegate based the otters in her story on some of the real-life otters who have been cared for by the Monterey Bay Aquarium staff in the Sea Otter Rescue and Conservation program. As a side note, sea otters are currently listed as an endangered species.

ADULT

BOOK REVIEW

Review By: Lorrie Layton PROVIDED BY BRACE BOOKS & MORE

Don’t Text Your Ex Happy Birthday . . . and other advice on love, sex, and dating

BY NICK VIALL I saw this book on the shelf and just had to pick it up. No, I’m not looking for advice on love, sex or dating; it just grabbed my attention. I then stood there in the bookstore and read aloud from the Q&A section to my friends. Nick Viall’s commonsense, one-liner answers were entertaining and captured my attention.

This book, despite the title, is about being honest with yourself. It’s about understanding yourself and your choices, controlling what you can control and recognizing what is outside your control. The author, Nick Viall, is up front about not being a trained expert. Several times throughout the book he reminds the reader that he isn’t a therapist or a relationship counselor. He is, however, the host of The Viall Files, a podcast that focuses on relationships.

Nick reminds the reader, “You’re searching for your person, your one.” He encourages us to recognize our nonnegotiables, set our expectations and enforce our

boundaries. He discusses the value of being grateful instead of hopeful. He reminds us that dating and relationships require hard work. Movies mislead us about what dating and relationships look like and how easy they should be with that one special person. That’s a lie we fall for so easily.

Nick also helps us understand why we do some of the things we do in relationships, like welcoming back someone who broke our heart, feeling like we’ve invested too much time in a relationship to quit now (even if we’re miserable) and being willing to accept someone hurting us so we don’t have to be alone.

While this book is supposedly advice on love, sex and dating, I found that much of this book applied to relationships in general, especially setting expectations, identifying nonnegotiables and enforcing boundaries. I also found the book highly entertaining.

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MARCH 2023 57

Story by Adam Leaming, Ponca City Public Schools / Contributing Writer

“How are things in Ponca City?”

I get asked how things are in Ponca City from my peers and colleagues across the state as if we live in a foreign country. I respond with “GREAT!” But if I had time to point out a few things, I would give them a whole lot more. Did you know we’re attracting individuals each day to move to our wonderful city? It’s true!

The first reason we’re attracting folks is Ponca City has a strong and diversified economy, with a mix of manufacturing, healthcare and energy industries providing a stable base of jobs for residents. We attract people to the area for several different types of employment opportunities.

This past weekend I met an individual who moved here from near Atlanta, Georgia, and relocated to Ponca City. She had first moved North of the border, but quickly became acquainted with our community and moved here! When I asked why, she stated she was in awe of our history and the culture found within our community. Ponca City has a rich history and culture, with a variety of historical sites, museums and cultural events that can attract tourists and visitors to the area. I love how we are able to attract new residents who appreciate the city’s cultural heritage.

I’m most fond of having the opportunity to

58 MARCH 2023

work in a strong and high-quality public-school system. This can be a major factor in attracting families to the area. Parents are often looking for good schools for their children when they are deciding where to relocate, and a well-regarded public-school system can be a major selling point for the community. We aim to keep Ponca City public schools with a good reputation for providing a high-quality education and preparing students for success in college or careers.

Our school system can also provide a variety of extracurricular activities and programs that can attract students and families to the area. For example, the school system offers a wide range of athletic programs, music and art programs, and clubs that can provide students with opportunities to explore their interests and talents. This fall we look to bring online our Wildcat E-Sports program. It will be increasingly important for our school district to evaluate what programs and offerings can be

made for the public as we move forward.

To all my friends around the state living their best life, I say we have it going pretty well here.

I think all the pieces are here for the next phase in our community’s development. I look forward to helping grow the community by providing high-quality education, offering a variety of extracurricular activities and programs and community services. Together we will create more selling points for our community and continue to attract families to our area.

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STREAM M A E R ST IT

IT

Editor’s Note: Streaming has changed the way humans consume television. With nearly every episode of every show ever created available at our fingertips, many viewers are discovering shows they may have missed when they originally aired. Though times and technology change, good storytelling never goes out of style. Our new monthly series “Stream It” will help introduce our readers to some of the best that streaming TV has to offer.

r

Story by Hayley Harrison / Staff Writer

“Shrinking” is Apple TV+’s latest dramedy (drama+comedy), and if you enjoy viewing vividly familiar, human stories that simultaneously break your heart and then warm it right back up with bits of brilliant comedic relief and incredibly touching sentiments – this is definitely the show for you. Created by Jason Segel (actor/writer on Forgetting Sarah Marshall, How I Met Your Mother), Brett Goldstein (actor/writer/producer on Ted Lasso) and Bill Lawrence (producer/writer on Scrubs and Ted Lasso), Shrinking follows the story of therapist Jimmy Laird (Jason Segel), who has spent the last year of his life desperately trying to numb and

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detach himself from the overwhelming emotions that followed his wife’s sudden and tragic passing.

Upon meeting Jimmy in the first episode, it is clear that he has made an absolute mess of his personal life. Soon after though, he begins taking steps to overcome his grief and repair the relationships that he has damaged. He begins his quest for self-healing, by implementing the extremely unorthodox (and ill-advised) method of telling his clients exactly what he thinks during their therapy sessions. He holds absolutely nothing back, and we get a front-row seat to the life-changing events that unfold afterward.

Shrinking is as relatable as it is meaningful. It is lovely and messy and hilarious and boy, does it hit you right in the feels (as the kids say). It also boasts an incredible star-studded cast, with Jessica Williams, Christa Miller and a guy named HARRISON FORD (yes, you read that right), as well as some brilliant newcomers that you may not recognize – Lukita Maxwell and Luke Tennie. So, if I’ve talked you into watching it by this point, you can do so by streaming it on AppleTV+, where you will be able to watch the first two episodes for free, if you are not already a subscriber. Happy streaming, friends!

You can stream Shrinking on Apple TV+

5 60 MARCH 2023

ATTENTION ALL TRIBAL MEMBERS:

The Kaw Nation has an office in Ponca City to better serve all federally recognized tribal members. The Kanza Human Development Division staff offers assistance with education, employment/training and child care.

Kanza Human Development Division

Home is where your story begins, I can help you get there.

BECKY POET 580.763.1871 beckypoet@ gmail.com

Cradle To College & Beyond

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CHILDCARE Providing childcare assistance for tribal members who are parents, single or married, who need employment, education or training to be self-sufficient.

To set up an appointment, please call 580-749-5420.

Bring your Tribal card, driver’s license, proof of residence and Social Security card.

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Would you rather get punched, bare handed, in the nose two times on every single March 1,

few years of being punched, your healing time will likely increase. Sometimes there can be complications with healing or surgery and if you’re still having problems and another March 1 rolls around, you still have to get punched. Also keep in mind that sometimes broken noses can cause black eyes and swelling, so any social events may need to be scheduled around the punch date … so would you rather do that or engage in small talk with someone? I’d choose the first option, with no hesitation. Small talk is physically painful to me, infinitely more than a yearly broken nose. I don’t want to talk about weather; I want to talk about why you and your partner are having marital problems. I don’t want to talk about which sports team just won; I want to know your thoughts on the current divide in our country and what, in your opinion, are the major contributing factors.

Don’t talk to me about your job; I want to talk about your childhood traumas. I want to know what conspiracy theories you think are true and please be prepared to give me all the details about why you believe they’re true. Which famous unsolved murder/true crime case is your favorite? If you had to choose your favorite member of N’Sync, why is it JC Chasez? The only small talk I will accept is what current television shows you’re watching, because I’m probably watching them too. Yearly nose punches > small talk, and this is a hill I’m prepared to die on.

every single year of your life, and each year it’s by a different person, picked at random from a pool of individuals that signed up to potentially be chosen to punch you specifically in the face? They’ll have varying degrees of strength, anger toward you and skills, in regards to punching. They will find out if they’re the chosen person to punch you 24 hours in advance, so while they won’t have time to take boxing lessons or do strength-training courses, they could watch YouTube videos about how to properly and effectively punch someone. If they are terrible at punching and miss your nose with either of the two punches, they do not get extra punches; they just should have watched more YouTube videos about punching.

The average time it takes to heal a broken nose is three weeks, if you don’t need surgery, and if you do need to consult with a doctor or have medical intervention, or corrective surgery, that is at your own financial expense. Healing time can be lengthened as you get older and as more scar tissue develops, so after a

15 Puzzle on Page 29

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V O T E S

Puzzle on Page 50

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R E L A N D F L A G

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Kids Say the Darnedest Things

Sibling Love Story by Hayley Harrison / Staff Writer

From the time my oldest daughter was three years old, she started telling her dad and me that she absolutely had to have a baby sister. There was no way around it; she needed a baby sister, and we better figure out how to get her one. Every time she brought it up, we would quickly crush her dream of sibling bliss by reiterating that she was indeed going to be our only child. Our perfect, angelic, precious only child. She was not at all thrilled to hear that, but she kept hope alive, and then lo and behold 2021 rolled around, and well, we accidentally gave her the sweet, 9-pound, 2-ounce baby sister that she always wanted – or thought she wanted anyways …!

The excitement of holding the “Big Sister” title started to fade the moment she walked into the hospital room and saw her momma holding a baby that wasn’t her – the betrayal! But the real kicker was when HER grandparents thought it was acceptable to take their attention off the brand-new

dance that she had just choreographed in the hospital room in order to “ooh and ahh” over this dang new baby, who in her opinion, wasn’t even that cool. That was the moment she decided she would like to rescind her application for a sister and return this baby to sender – ASAP. That feeling did not change for her when we got home from the hospital. She (and I am not lying) tried (and succeeded most of the time) to schedule her own after-school plans and weekends so that she didn’t have to be at home with “that baby.” There was an instance where she tried to trade her baby sister straight across for a new rug, and another time when she tried to talk the very sweet lady that keeps them for me while I work, into leaving her sister in the dog kennel so that she could go outside to play.

baby sister half a chance to bond with her.

Then, one day we were out with friends who have a toddler close to the same age as ours, and we were all chatting and laughing, when all of a sudden, our youngest starts letting it out because the other toddler was pulling her hair. Before any of us even had a chance to react, my oldest daughter swooped in out of nowhere, put her baby sister on her hip and carried her to safety. She then continued to stay right by her side to make sure it didn’t happen again. My husband and I immediately locked eyes with expressions that said, “OMG, she does love her!”

We were so proud of her that day! And hilarious anecdotes aside, she really is a fantastic big sister and we wouldn’t be able to make it without her!

My husband and I were starting to wonder whether or not she would ever give her

D MARCH 2023 63

Wishing you a pot o’ gold, and all the joy your heart can hold.

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