OutreachNC Magazine April 2017 by OutreachNC

COMPLIMENTARY

APRIL 2017 | VOL. 8, ISSUE 4

Careers & Volunteers issue

CAROLINA CONVERSATIONS WITH “BECOMING GRANDMA” AUTHOR LESLEY STAHL

Serving the Sandhills & Southern Piedmont

APRIL 2017 |

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features APRIL 2017

Careers & Volunteers Issue

4 Ways to Kick Start Your Second Career into High Gear

Honoring World War II Veterans Series: Reese Maxey

by Rachel Stewart & Carrie Frye

by Jonathan Scott

Stitches of Kindness & Comfort by Flo Johnston

Carolina Conversations with “60 Minutes” Correspondent and Best-Selling Author Lesley Stahl by Carrie Frye

The Joy in Giving Back by Jonathan Scott

42 A Welcome Career 4

by Carrie Frye

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56 Volunteering with Valor by Michelle Goetzl

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departments April 2017

“The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.”

—Mark Twain

22 18 advice & health

life

Ask the Expert by Amy Natt, MS, CMC, CSA

Regional Culture by Ray Linville

Caregiving by Mike Collins

Belle Weather by Celia Rivenbark

Brain Health by Heather Tipens, LPC

Cooking Simple by Rhett Morris

Money Matters by Robin Nutting, CLTC

The Reader’s Nook by Michelle Goetzl

Nutrition by Laura Buxenbaum, MPH

Resource Marketplace Find the resources you need.

Grey Matter Games Sudoku, Word Search & Crossword Puzzles

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Generations by Carrie Frye & Michelle Goetzl

COVER PHOTOGRAPHY BY DAVE LAURIDSEN

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articles

advice previous issues recipes

magazine extras

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from the editor

pril and a Carolina spring are finally here, and since this is our “Careers & Volunteers” issue, we shine a little sunlight on some of the many good works that go on every day in our region. From tasks, such as serving plates, knitting, loading boxes, organizing donations and teaching a skill, all of the volunteers here in the Sandhills and Southern Piedmont never cease to amaze and inspire this editor. We hope they will inspire you, too. To every volunteer, your effortsno matter how small-bring smiles, joy, compassion and more to those on the receiving end and never go unappreciated. We thank you all for the valuable time you shared to let us tell your stories. On the longtime careers side of our theme, we head out to the renowned Pinehurst No. 2 to meet two of the kindest gentlemen who have made the hospitality of welcoming guests to the course their profession, side by side, for the past 31 years. Following their successful professional lives, we meet some of our neighbors who are kicking their second careers into high gear by following their hearts and finding passion in consulting, walking for breast cancer, coin collecting and a goat farm. Who can resist adorable baby goats? Not me, I can assure you, and the goat cheese is pretty amazing, too. Check out the Cooking Simple recipe for Goat Cheese Spinach Pasta on Page 18. It is not every day either that one has the honor of speaking with someone whose career you’ve watched with admiration. If there is a standard for journalism, it lies in the work of Lesley Stahl. Her latest book, “Becoming Grandma,” examines this new age of grandparenthood, which boomers are embracing in unique ways and changing the role for the better. She was so kind and generous with her time, and this editor is still smiling! Enjoy all of the blossoms of this beautiful season, and may all of the April showers wash the pollen away quickly. Thank you for turning these pages again with us. Co-editor Jeeves is readily lending a paw to clear off the editor’s desk for his after-supper nap. Until next month...

—Carrie Frye

OutreachNC.com | APRIL 2017

Editor in Chief Carrie Frye | CarrieF@OutreachNC.com Contributing Graphic Designers Stephanie Budd, Nikki Lienhard, Jonathan Scott Contributing Proofreaders Michelle Goetzl, Jennifer Kirby, Kate Pomplun Contributing Photographers Katherine Clark, Dave Lauridsen, Diana Matthews, Ken Pao Contributing Writers Laura Buxenbaum, Mike Collins, Michelle Goetzl, Flo Johnston, Ray Linville, Rhett Morris, Robin Nutting, Celia Rivenbark, Jonathan Scott, Rachel Stewart, Heather Tippens

Y Publisher Amy Natt | AmyN@AgingOutreachServices.com Marketing & Public Relations Director Susan McKenzie | SusanM@AgingOutreachServices.com Advertising Sales Executive Ashley Haddock | AshleyH@OutreachNC.com 910-690-9102 Advertising Sales Executive Butch Peiker | ButchP@OutreachNC.com 904-477-8440 OutreachNC PO Box 2478 | 676 NW Broad Street Southern Pines, NC 28388 910-692-9609 Office | 910-695-0766 Fax info@OutreachNC.com

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OutreachNC is a publication of The entire contents of OutreachNC are copyrighted by Aging Outreach Services. Reproduction or use without permission of editorial, photographic or graphic content in any manner is prohibited. OutreachNC is published monthly on the first of each month.

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advice

Our Aging Life Care ProfessionalsTM will answer any aging questions you may have.

Email us your questions! info@OutreachNC.com

ASK THE EXPERT

10 Tips for Coping with Dementia Shadowing by Amy Natt, MS, CMC, CSA My wife was diagnosed with dementia about a year ago, and she is still very independent in most of her activities. Recently, I have noticed that she does not want me out of her sight. She stays by my side when we are out and follows me from room to room when we are at home. This can be difficult to manage sometimes. Can you offer any suggestions?

People who have some type of dementia often demonstrate a behavior called shadowing. According to the Mayo Clinic, shadowing occurs when the person with dementia attempts to keep his or her caregiver in sight at all times, following them like a small child would a parent. Shadowing can leave the caregiver feeling smothered and their personal space feeling violated. Think of yourself as a security blanket for your loved one. She feels safe when in your presence and insecure, anxious or fearful when she does not see you. You are familiar in a world that is becoming increasingly unfamiliar as the dementia progresses. This behavior is part of the disease, not something your wife is doing intentionally. Caregivers need to find balance. You want your wife to feel secure, but you also need time that is just for you to reset and rejuvenate. It is important to create a predictable daily routine for her. A part of this routine can be a typical time to wake up in the morning and go to bed at night. As a caregiver, you may be able to determine her typical pattern and get up an hour before her, or have an hour after she goes to bed that is your time. Planning activities she can engage in during the day is helpful as well. Write these out daily on a white board and display the schedule for her to see. Fear drives many of the changes in mood and personality those with dementia experience, so you want to create a calm and reassuring environment. 10

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Consider these tips to try and help with the shadowing behavior: 1. Use written notes. Leave a note to let your wife know when you are leaving and what time you will return. Make sure she has a clock that is easily readable. 2. Try using a timer. When you need to have some alone time, like going to the bathroom, or running to the store, set the timer and tell her you will be back as soon as the timer dings. 3. Use reassuring statements. Say, “You are safe,” “I love you,” “Everything is OK” or “I am here for you,” and try writing them down for her to read or recording them for her to listen to over and over. 4. Attend a local support group. These groups are where you can have conversations with other caregivers to find out what is working for them. 5. Try scheduling your “private time” at the same time daily. If your loved one is really anxious about you leaving, introduce a friend or caregiver who can be there while you are gone. This may be hard at first, but typically will transition into a relationship she can count on and feel secure in.

“

”

aregiving often calls us to lean into love we didn’t know possible. —TIA WALKER “The Inspired Caregiver: Finding Joy While Caring for Those You Love”

6. Create meaningful activities for her to do. This may be folding laundry, setting the table, going on a walk, volunteering (with a friend or caregiver helping), working on a puzzle, organizing or sorting items, or planting a container garden, etc. 7. A snack can provide a nice break. If you are headed to shower or work in the garage, try a healthy snack as a diversion. 8. Music can be very beneficial. Make a digital playlist of her favorite songs and play them to provide stimulation and something familiar she can relate to and enjoy. 9. Create a memory book. Use familiar photos and items she can look at, hold and enjoy. Label each picture clearly with names and places. 10. Keep some picture books on hand. There are many great books that are primarily photography with small written statements about a variety of topics. Find one that relates to some of her interests.

Create a tool box of ideas. Keep in mind that the approach that works one day may not work the next, so use trial and error and have a variety of tips in your toolbox that can be tried on different days. Remember that the shadowing is a reaction to an underlying feeling of uncertainty, and try to provide extra reassurance. Use touch and kindness to foster feelings of security. As a husband and caregiver, you need to take time for yourself. It is difficult but very important to find the balance. Shadowing can create a feeling of loss of personal space, but you should not feel guilty about needing that space to take care of yourself. Reach out to available resources, and create the support network you will both need throughout this journey. Readers may send questions to Natt, an Aging Life Care ProfessionalTM, certified senior advisor and CEO of Aging Outreach Services. She can be reached at amyn@agingoutreachservices.com .

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life

R E G I O N A L C U LT U R E

Watch Out for Pranksters

by Ray Linville

as the first of April a special day when you were growing up? It’s always been a day for innocent pranks and jokes. Our area is filled with tricksters and mischiefmakers. Probably the most notorious is Dr. John Dempsey, president of Sandhills Community College. When I started teaching there, I was totally unaware that he lives for the joy of being Chief Prankster on April Fool’s Day. On my first April 1 as an instructor, I dutifully opened the email program on my desktop computer and saw a message from Dempsey at the top of unread messages. His message was so ominous, the tone so serious. I no longer remember the specifics about the problem or Dr. Dempsey’s very logical solution. I’ve long since purged it from my memory, but I do remember that it worried me constantly while I was in my morning classes. At my first break, I read the message again-just to make sure that I hadn’t misinterpreted any detail. Only then did I realize I probably wasn’t alone among the employees (particularly those in their first year at the college) who unsuspectedly believed every word. Several replies, fortunately sent “Reply to All,” commented on the “dire situation” and offered

their own insights and solutions. Because their tone was not as ominous, even a novice could tell that a trick was being played. Finally, after seeing “Best April Fool’s Day joke ever” in a reply, I breathed a sigh of relief, but the rest of the day I was shaking my head at how gullible I had been. Of course, a year later, I repeated the same experience, much like Phil Connors in the 1993 movie “Groundhog Day” when he finds himself in a time loop and repeats the same day over and over. At least I had a break of 365 days before finding myself in the loop of believing another bogus “dire situation” in an April Fool’s Day message. Time magazine annually reports online the best pranks of the year. You can use your favorite search engine now to find the best pranks for this year. In 2016, they included a chicken fries shake at a fast-food restaurant, self-driving bicycles, umbrellas for dogs and a free concert with tickets available by calling a politician’s campaign headquarters. However, none of them ever match Dempsey’s creativity. If you know someone who works at the college, see if they fell for his prank this year-and be on guard yourself throughout the year for the pranksters that you know.

Linville writes about local connections to Southern food, history and culture. He can be reached at linville910@gmail.com .

OutreachNC.com | APRIL 2017

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advice

CAREGIVING CAN MAKE LIFE CRAZY!

What You Know and Don’t Know by Mike Collins

s caregivers, we encounter a whole range of professionals and volunteers while fulfilling our caregiving responsibilities. If you are anything like my brother and me, some of your encounters cause you to wonder, “Does anyone appreciate what it takes to do this?” Here’s something that might ease your stress a little. In 2015, the American College of Physicians released a paper stating, “Family caregivers play a major role in maximizing the health and quality of life of more than 30 million individuals with acute and chronic illness. Patients depend on family caregivers for assistance with daily activities, managing complex care, navigating the healthcare system and communicating with healthcare professionals.” However, being recognized, and actually fulfilling the responsibilities of, “assistance with daily activities, managing complex care, navigating the healthcare system and communicating with health care professionals,” are two very different things. One relatively simple issue connects all caregiver responsibilities and execution—getting it all done. The issue is memory. How much do you remember about the fire hose blast of information all those professionals and volunteers provide? According to The Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine, not much. Their researchers found that 40-80 percent of

medical information provided by healthcare practitioners is forgotten immediately. Think about that for a moment: 40-80 percent of the information about how to care for our loved one literally goes in one ear and out the other. A few years ago, I had heard that we forget half of what doctors say before we ever walk out of their offices. The findings in the JRSM are even worse. The researchers also discovered three areas of concern about memory: • Our memory is worse if we are older and anxious (anxious? Well, duh). • We focus on information about the diagnosis and not on the treatment instructions. We should ask for simple information in specific categories. • Most of the information is conveyed verbally, but we remember more effectively if the spoken instructions are accompanied by written or visual information. Believe it or not, there is a simple, easy way to do a much better job of remembering the information that is crucial to doing a good job as a family caregiver. The key is the Question Corner. Whenever you visit a professional or anyone providing services, always have something to write with and something to write on. A notebook is one of the best investments you can make as a caregiver.

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In the upper left-hand corner of a page, write seven simple questions. You are writing them in the upper left-hand corner because we, in the Western world, read left to right. So, the questions are the first thing you see on the page. The questions are: What? Why? Who? Where? When? How? and How Much? That’s the Question Corner. Neuroscience shows us that simply writing the questions and seeing them as we listen causes our brains to retain more, and we are prompted to ask better questions. You’ll have your notes to help you remember, and you may even ask the professional to jot a few comments or notes for you. Here are ways the questions can be useful: • What? What, specifically, do I need to be doing? What are the implications of not taking the medication? What do I do if X happens? • Why? Why is my loved one taking this medication, doing this therapy or acting like this?

• Who? Who do I contact in case of an emergency? Who can help us with ______? • Where? Where do I go to find this sort of product or help? Where are we in the journey of my loved one’s condition? Where are we in the decision-making process? • When? When is our next appointment? When do I give this medication? • How? How do I administer this medication? How do I move my loved one so he or she is more comfortable? How do we file these documents? • How Much? How much will certain types of assistance cost? How much time will certain processes take? How much time can I be away before he or she gets anxious?

You can come up with additional questions as well. The key benefit to creating the Question Corner is that it is an outstanding tool for remembering crucial information. Get in the habit of jotting down the questions and you will see your memory improve.

Collins is the producer of the video, “Care for the Caregiver,” winner of a National Caregiver Friendly Award from Today’s Caregiver Magazine. For ways to deal with the craziness of caregiving, visit www.crazycaregiver.com . ©2017 Mike Collins

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life

B E L L E W E AT H E R

Grass Is Always Greener on Other Side of the Recycling Center by Celia Rivenbark

y the time I got back from the recycling center in the bucolic backwoods of somewhere in Maine, I was almost doing a full-on ugly cry. Here’s the thing: I live in a town where the recyclables are picked up, curbside, twice a month. I don’t have to sort the stuff because, well, civilization, but now I know how spoiled I am. On vacation, Duh Hubby and I volunteered to take a week’s worth of recyclables to the nearest center. “Back in a few!” we called cheerfully to our friends. Yes, well. Not quite. Let it be known, the people of mid-coast Maine are extremely specific about how and what one recycles. A guy who looked a lot like Bon Jovi approached with a clipboard as I tossed a plastic garbage bag into a dumpster. “Excuse me,” he said, looking at me as if I’d just dumped a bag labeled “playful newborn puppies” into the bin. “Did you just toss neutral plastics into the mixed paper collection site?” “Do what?” I said. When publicly embarrassed, my default is confused Bubba. Every time. “You can’t put neutral plastics in with mixed paper.” He was speaking very slowly now and making little angry notes on his clipboard. “My bad,” I said. When Bubba doesn’t cut it, I go straight to the “Jeopardy!” category: “Things that don’t sound right coming out of the mouth of anyone over 25.” “Didn’t you see the sign?” At this point, I looked around and saw many signs. I just couldn’t believe they were serious. Translucent No. 2 milk jugs had their own container. Other Plastic, defined as “No. 1 through 7 except for No.

OutreachNC.com | APRIL 2017

2” labeled another huge bin. Four green (but of course) barrels were labeled “tin cans,” “clear glass,” “brown glass” and “green glass.” The largest of the containers was labeled “newspapers, magazines, catalogs, phone books but no mixed paper.” Man, they really hate mixed paper up in here. If you, like I, were wondering what exactly constitutes “mixed paper,” there was a professionally made sign labeled, no kidding, “What mixed paper is and what it is not.” “Are you believing this?” I asked Duh, who was back in the car trying to find the baseball game on the radio. “Do what?” “The recycling police are mad at us,” I explained. “Mixed paper is flat cardboard, junk mail, egg cartons, juice cartons and office paper but not shredded paper unless it is placed in a paper bag, which I assume has not been shredded.” “Do tell,” said Duh. Yes, and mixed paper is NOT, even on its best day, “corrugated cardboard, newspaper, magazines, foam core, plastic, foil, ribbons, string or food scraps.” Yes, food scraps. Who confuses mixed paper with food scraps? It’s not like you’re going to try to print out something on your computer using a few slices of bologna. At least not while anyone is looking. Rivenbark is the best-selling author of seven humor collections. Visit her website at www.celiarivenbark.com . ©2017 Celia Rivenbark. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.

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life

COOKING SIMPLE

Goat Cheese Spinach Pasta by Rhett Morris | Photography by Diana Matthews

Ingredients 4 oz. Paradox Farm goat cheese 8 oz. fresh spinach 8 oz. penne pasta 8 cherry tomatoes, cut in half Salt and pepper to taste

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Directions

Place water in pot for pasta, and bring to a boil. Add 3 tablespoons of salt and pasta to pot. Cook pasta until it’s al dente, or cooked firm to the bite. While pasta is boiling, place spinach and tomatoes in a large salad bowl. When pasta is cooked, reserve ¼ cup of pasta water, and then strain pasta with a slotted spoon and add to bowl. Add goat Morris, owner of Rhett’s Restaurant, Personal Chef cheese, ¼ cup of reserve pasta & Catering, is an awardwater and toss until cheese winning chef. He can be melts into pasta and spinach is reached at 910-695-3663 wilted. Add salt and pepper to or rhett@rhettsrpcc.com . taste, and serve warm.

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health

B R A I N H E A LT H

Would You Benefit From Therapy? by Heather Tippens, LPC

n the past, there have been many obstacles for those seeking therapy services, including stigma, accessibility, time and costs. It is often perceived that therapy is for those who have suffered a life-altering event, trauma, or are living with a major mental illness or addiction. The benefits of therapy are not limited to treating only those in crisis, but it can also provide emotional support to ordinary people who are struggling with common, everyday issues. Chronic stress has been linked to increased rates of depression, anxiety and can lead to medical-related issues, including high blood pressure, gastrointestinal issues, and cognitive complaints, such as trouble paying attention, memory loss, headaches, increase in pain levels and sleep disturbances. Research has shown that social and emotional support can help build a resilience against stress. The most common types of therapy are cognitive behavioral, psychodynamic, family, couples and group. Therapy can be beneficial whether you are looking to reduce the impact of stress, manage anxiety or depression, change a bad habit or improve relationships. Whether you choose individual-talk therapy or group therapy, there is comfort in knowing that you are not alone. With the encouragement and maintenance of accountability, you can become more successful at accomplishing your goals and developing emotional awareness. Therapy is a positive outlet that allows one to establish or improve emotional wellness, confidence, peace of mind and

quality of life. It provides interventions to better understand your thoughts, moods, behaviors and to recognize alternative perspectives. A therapist can provide feedback and offer insight into how your emotions are affecting everyday life and your relationships. Therapy is known for its problem-solving techniques. Learning to re-frame anxious thoughts from a “what if ” to a “what then” approach can be very helpful in reducing distress. Focusing on a reasonable solution within our control can reduce overwhelming emotions. Being able to better manage daily stressors or finally make peace with a traumatic event from the past also improves our mental and physical health. There have also been changes to the accessibility and costs of therapy. The Affordable Care Act requires most insurance plans to extend coverage to mental-health treatment. Most policies allow for between eight to 24 visits per year. Contact your individual insurance carrier for more information regarding coverage for therapy. Free or low-cost helplines and support groups in your area can also be found on the National Alliance of Mental Health website, www.nami.org. Tippens, a licensed counselor at Pinehurst Neuropsychology, can be reached at 910-420-8041 or by visiting www.pinehurstneuropsychology.com .

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life

THE READER’S NOOK

‘Commonwealth’ Book Review by Michelle Goetzl

“T

he christening party took a turn when Albert Cousins arrived with gin.” So begins Ann Patchett’s newest work, “Commonwealth.” This novel tells the story of two blended families over a 50-year period starting when Albert Cousins crashes Franny Keating’s christening party as a way to avoid his own wife and children. Before evening falls, he has kissed Franny’s mother, Beverly—thus setting in motion the dissolution of their marriages and the joining of two families. From one kiss at a party in the 1960s, the lives of four adults and six children are forever impacted. After Albert marries Beverly, he moves his new wife and her two daughters to Virginia. His four children stay in California with their mother but fly east every summer. The siblings become a unit unto themselves with more anger directed at their parents than at each other, especially Albert. The six children are left to their own devices in a way that we rarely see anymore. In Virginia, as the family sets out on a summer vacation, Albert and Beverly leave the children a note under their motel room door that reads, “Have breakfast in the coffee shop. You can charge it. We’re sleeping late. Do not knock.” The kids decide to walk to the lake, taking with them a six-pack of coke, 12 candy bars, a gun and a fifth of gin. They mix the gin with Benadryl to drug Albie, the youngest, so they don’t have to watch him at the lake and instead let him sleep it off under a tree.

From the aforementioned scene to a tragic accident that gets alluded to early on and not explained until about two thirds into the book, Patchett steadily builds her story. As with earlier works by Patchett, the story weaves itself together as it moves along until it becomes a cohesive work. Even what seems like a chance meeting between Franny and famous author Leon Posen becomes so much more as Posen turns their family drama into a best-selling novel. Patchett uses a format of showing rather than telling the story, and she doesn’t fully develop all of the characters either. That said, it is a book that leaves you thinking about what you have just read. “Commonwealth” forces you to think about relationships and parenting styles, then consider the ways our society has changed since the 1960s and ’70s. While not a light read, “Commonwealth” is a profoundly engaging one.

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advice

M O N E Y M AT T E R S

4 Tips to Help Maximize Social Security

Incorporating Social Security into Your Retirement Strategy by Robin Nutting, CLTC®

he money taken out of your paycheck every month may be unwelcome now, but it can give you monthly income later in life. However, some question if Social Security will last long enough for those in the workforce now to be able to receive these benefits. According to Social Security trustees, enough reserves exist for the system to pay 100 percent of promised benefits until 2033, without further reform. Full benefits are available at age 65 for those born before 1938, gradually increasing to age 67 for those born in 1960 or later. There is more to Social Security than just applying for retirement benefits when you are eligible at age 62 or over. By waiting, you can maximize your benefits, which will increase every year you choose to wait to file for Social Security retirement benefits. Consider these four tips before applying for Social Security.

Don’t assume it won’t be there. Social Security is projected to last at least until 2033, so the first mistake is writing it off as a resource that won’t be available. Planning early for the role Social Security will play in your retirement will prevent you from being caught off guard and missing out on increased benefits once you are ready to start collecting.

Know your situation. Retirement income planning is critical. Social Security has many nuances, so a personalized approach is necessary to get a better grasp of your retirement future. By using your current information from the Social Security Administration, financial representatives may be able to create scenarios to give you an idea of how the age you begin receiving distributions can affect the monthly amounts you will receive. For example, if you’re divorced or widowed, a financial representative will be able to calculate the different ways you can claim benefits and how they can affect your retirement strategy.

Wait to draw. Now that you are planning for it, you can figure out the right time for you to start receiving benefits. For many people, this will be after the age that you are eligible to start collecting full benefits. For every year that you delay, Social Security benefits will increase by a set percentage, eventually putting your

Nutting, CLTC, a financial associate with Thrivent Financial in Southern Pines, can reached at 910-692-5570 or robin.nutting@thrivent.com .

OutreachNC.com | APRIL 2017

monthly benefit above 100 percent. Delaying can also multiply the benefits after it is adjusted for cost-ofliving and can potentially reduce the number of years benefits are subject to income taxes. Factors to consider as to when to file for your Social Security benefits include: health status, life expectancy, need for income, future employment and survivor needs. A financial representative can help you build all of this information into an overall retirement strategy.

Get your financial house in order. If you delay your Social Security benefits, you will need to have another way to pay for your needs while you are not working. If you planned early enough, you will likely have adjusted your finances so that you are prepared. Again, talking to a representative can help you plan the best option for the interim time before receiving Social Security.

Social Security can be confusing, but talking to a representative can help you clarify the role it can play in your retirement strategy. Once you have a strategy in place, you will better be able to enjoy your retirement years, without worrying about the next paycheck. APRIL 2017 |

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Ways to

KICK

Your Second Career into High Gear by Rachel Stewart & Carrie Frye | Photography by Diana Matthews

n the past, retirement meant saying goodbye to a long-term position and then dedicating time to family or simple relaxation. For many of today’s baby boomers, retirement may equal an opportunity to try something new or simply stay more active in their community. According to the Health and Retirement Study by the National Institutes for Health, many continue to work in a part- or full-time capacity after retirement, with boomers expecting to work longer than their earlier counterparts.

Continuing to work has serious financial advantages, both for the bank account and overall wellness. Studies suggest that staying active by being employed can delay conditions like dementia. Other people may miss the structure a job gave them and continuing to work can actually provide BE A CONSULTANT. feelings of happiness. Working after If you’ve spent decades working retirement can also help you continue to in a specific field, you’ve seen how build your savings, such as your 401k things have changed over time and have a or IRA. wealth of knowledge that makes you valuable.

If you’re forgoing the traditional nine-to-five hours or retail job but want to keep busy, consider these four ways to supplement your hard-earned retirement savings and income. And meet three boomers who are embracing these ideas in their own lives and second careers for the better.

Reach out to temp agencies with your resume to find contract-based employment. You may work with particular firms or agencies on short-term projects lasting a few months, or you could be kept on a retainer for long-term business needs. Unlike a full-time job, contracting can be much more flexible for both the employer and employee, so you can plan work around your life, not the other way around. CONTINUED PAGE 26

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retired middle-school principal, Rose Cooper of Whispering Pines, now has a new mission. Serving as an educational consultant, Cooper is proud to share her teaching techniques with her U.S. Army Special Forces students at Fort Bragg. However, her spare time is spent focused on a cause close to her heart. As a breast cancer survivor, Cooper has dedicated herself this year to the Avon 39 The Walk to End Breast Cancer. She and her daughter are traveling to Houston, Texas, April 22-23 for the walk, in which participants walk 26.2 miles on Saturday, and 13.1 on Sunday to complete the 39-mile trek to raise funds and awareness. It was a few simple words of advice from her motherin-law that led Cooper down this path. “She told to me to pay it forward,” she says, lacing up her walking shoes for her next outing on her training program. “I wanted to do something healthy, and when I committed, there was no going back.” There is joy in this 16-week training journey, too. Along with her daughter at her side for the walk, many of Cooper’s friends have reached out to join her for walks and support her both with walking and her fundraising goal. “What is really fun is the support I get from the soldiers in my class,” Cooper says. “They are always asking, ‘How did you do and how far are you walking now?’ It helps hold me accountable, too. I’m so grateful for the support of my friends and family, and the camaraderie of my walking partners.” Prompted by a Crain’s Creek Middle School breast cancer fundraiser to make time for her annual mammogram, Cooper was diagnosed in 2013. She underwent a double mastectomy, chemotherapy, radiation treatments and reconstructive surgery, before receiving a clean bill of health. “This is a good way for me to give back, since the funds raised benefit families in need of help with their breast cancer healthcare costs,” Cooper says. “It’s about finding a passion in something you didn’t even think you could do. The most I had ever walked was probably three miles, but I will be ready and will just get it done.” If you would like to support Rose Cooper for the Avon 39 The Walk to End Breast Cancer, visit her team website at http://info.avon39.org/goto/ TeamSuperDuperCooperClub . APRIL 2017 | OutreachNC.com 25

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SUPPORT A CAUSE CLOSE TO YOUR HEART. Retirement is the perfect time to focus on causes that matter to you, like Rose Cooperâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dedication to the Avon 39 walk for breast cancer. You could also seek out part-time employment at places that support these goals. This could include working at a local charity shop or bookkeeping or answering phones at a local nonprofit. Look for employment opportunities in sectors such as hospitals and churches. Sometimes, a job may come out of a volunteering position, so check with museums or libraries about how you can make a difference.

TURN YOUR CRAFT OR HOBBY INTO YOUR NEW CAREER. Do you have a skill that others rave about? It could be baking treats for birthday parties or wedding showers. Or you could have a green thumb and help your neighbor with pruning, landscaping or planting the perfect garden. Maybe you have an eye for finding antiques at steal-worthy prices. It could be teaching a skill, such as sewing or carpentry. No matter what your hobby is, look for ways to make it your new career either at local craft shows, farmers markets or expos. If you are more tech savvy, there are tons of ways to sell items online from eBay and Etsy to LetGo and Poshmark (for designer clothing and accessories). Set up your shop out of your home and press start! CONTINUED PAGE 28

t wasn’t quite the flip of a coin that helped Kevin Kirkman decide what to do after hanging up his Lee County Sheriff ’s Department uniform after 30 years of service, although it could have been the heads or tales side of a Washington quarter. As he evaluated his next move, Kirkman turned back to his hobby of coin collecting. “I was trying to figure out what to do next,” Kirkman says. “Law enforcement was a passion for me, and my father, uncle and grandfather all served. I always wanted to help people when they were in need, and I still work part-time as a bailiff at the Lee County Courthouse. When I decided to open a coin shop, the hardest thing was finding the right location.” Hanging out his shingle in downtown Sanford in 2015, KKoins is now Kirkman’s second career that allows him time to focus on a passion that began in his childhood. “I started collecting coins when I was 11 years old in Boy Scouts,” he recalls. “There was a coin merit badge I wanted to earn, and my mom gave me a box of coins so that I could, and I still have that box.” From there, Kirkman kept dabbling in coins, becoming a vest pocket coin dealer before leaving it as a mere hobby and settling into his career and family life. However, there was

always something that drew him back to it, because every coin has a story. ‘The thing about coins is really the artwork,” he says. “I think about how and when they were made, the history of each piece, how they were used on a daily basis, their value and who might have held the coin in their hands or pockets. Sometimes, coins are completely worn out, and it’s almost impossible to find the date—Buffalo coins, especially. I just enjoy looking at the coins and money, and trading, selling and meeting people who enjoy coins.” Serving customers in his shop, Kirkman offers coin supplies, something collectors in the region could only order online previously, and he enjoys talking with fellow collectors. And when he’s not at his shop, Kirkman travels to coin shows across North Carolina. “The most challenging part for me is not having a routine when I used to get up and put on a uniform,” Kirkman says, “but now, I get up and get to decide what I’m going to work on today.” For more information on KKoins, located at 217 Carthage Street in downtown Sanford, call 919-353-0813. APRIL 2017 |

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TRY SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. Is there something you have always wanted to try? There’s no time like the present. Look for an entry-level position in a new field. Consider job shadowing or apprenticing to learn more about your new profession. Whether or not it lasts, you answered another question on your “What if” list.

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ometimes, we find our passion in unanticipated places and the unlikely, yet adorable, faces, like those of the Paradox Farm goats. Officially retiring from her physical therapy practice in January 2016, Sue Stovall of West End, found a calling for farm life and juggled the duties of her busy practice for the past five years before devoting her time solely to the farm. “The farm has 100 percent of my focus now,” Stovall says. “We want to produce more goat’s milk, we’ve added a few varieties of cow’s milk cheeses, and the goal is to expand our markets to make the farm more financially stable.” Stovall now participates in five to six farmers markets per week and sells her cheeses at Southern Whey and Nature’s Own in Southern Pines, several farm-totable restaurants in the region and recently secured a distributor in the Raleigh area. Cheese Louise!, Stovall’s award-winning fresh chèvre goat cheese, comes in black pepper, fig and honey, garlic and herb, jalapeño, natural, roasted red pepper and seasonal flavors. Then there’s feta complee, hickory creek, Paradox paneer and Southern comforts varieties of red eye and drunk’n collard, which is aged, wrapped in collards and washed with a local muscadine wine. Milking goats, making cheese and all the many labors of the farm do require much time, attention and both part- and full-time helpers for Stovall, but that just adds to her determination. “With a prior career managing a business and people, you learn what works and what doesn’t,” she says, smiling. Stovall has even used her physical therapy expertise to put a cast on a baby goat born with a broken leg. “I was very fortunate to have a career in physical therapy that I loved where I was in my element, and farming has now become my comfort zone,” she says. “I go out first thing in the morning when the sun is coming up in the east. I have always loved what I do, and a goat farm is a lifestyle. It’s 24/7.” CONTINUED PAGE 30

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Stovall’s latest endeavors at the farm included raising an antique barn that will lend some extra space for cheese aging and planning a calendar of events, like an annual storytelling gathering in honor of her late husband, Hunter. Farm-goers may take home some of the Paradox cheese flavors or fudge on Sunday afternoons and pet a goat or two or 12 while there as well. So when not selling her cheeses at a farmers market, Stovall is content to be on Paradox’s 15 acres tending, at last count, 36 kids and 42 adult goats who call the farm home and helping birth any of this season’s newest arrivals. “I think I must have been a farmer in a past life, because it really soothes my soul,” Stovall says. “I’m not a planner, I’m a doer. I’m more spontaneous, and it works for me. It’s important to know your goal and objective, and ours is to make the best goat cheese for our community.” For more information on Paradox Farm, located at 449 Hickory Creek Lane in West End, visit www.paradoxfarmcreamery.com.

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Stitches of Kindness & Comfort

by Flo Johnston | Photography by Katherine Clark

oving and changing one’s lifestyle can be a recipe for extreme stress. Such was the situation for Cathy Goodman last summer when she and her husband, Ralph, moved from Richmond, Virginia, to Scotia Village, a retirement community in Laurinburg.

However, it took only a short time for this plucky lady to find a solution to her flagging spirits-a new niche for herself as a volunteer at Scotland Memorial Hospital. “Volunteering has helped me make a connection to my new community,” she says. Goodman knits tiny clothing for infants that is given to mothers who lose babies long before full-term. This kind of death in the medical world is called “fetal demise,” but Goodman contends these words are too cold and abstract for the death of tiny human beings. “These are babies,” she says with the passion that fuels her volunteer work. A retired elementary teacher, Goodman, for six years, belonged to “From the Heart,” a group of women in Richmond who knit and crochet for charity. “We had about 1,200 volunteers all over Virginia, some as individuals and some in groups of 25 to 30 in cities like Williamsburg, Lynchburg, Roanoke and Richmond, and now we have one in North Carolina,” she says, smiling. CONTINUED PAGE 34

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Three knitted items are included in the packages that are donated to the hospital for delivery by hospital personnel. The package includes a small blanket, measuring from 15 to 18 inches, an off-white gown opening in the back with blue or pink ribbon trim and a tiny hat to match. The little hats are just large enough to fit on a golf ball. Goodman knits the gowns and hats, but a majority of the blankets are made by Hilda Gingiloski, a friend in Virginia and a member of the “From the Heart” group. Packages of the three items are presented in a clear plastic wrapper. Goodman usually works at home, often while watching television, but occasionally she joins a knitting circle that meets on Wednesday afternoons at Scotia Village. It takes her about four hours to make a full set for the smallest baby and a bit more time for the larger ones. The gowns come in three sizes that measure 6 inches, 8 inches or 11 inches in length. Goodman, with her effervescent personality and abundant energy, has her own philosophy about finding and doing volunteer work. “After I retired, I looked for a way to volunteer,” she says. “I heard that the best way to decide is to find the place where something you really enjoy doing intersects with the needs of others. “I would go a step further and say that when you find that intersection, you not only find where you should work, but you also discover the joy of volunteering. Too many people volunteer for projects because it is ‘what they should do’ and they never realize the joy that can accompany the project. It’s that joy that is at the heart of volunteering and doing for others.” Nancy Rogers, director of volunteers at Scotland Memorial Hospital in Laurinburg, feels that Goodman’s contributions are significant to the hospital. “I got chills when I first saw the tiny little gowns,” Rogers says. “When someone loses a baby and has nothing to put on them for burial, the gowns are something for us to give parents to comfort them.” Volunteers at Scotland Memorial racked up some 22,000 hours of work last year. They do things the hospital would otherwise have to hire someone to do and this translates to money saved. With a grateful smile, Roger adds, “It’s a blessing to have volunteers.” 34

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n a brisk Monday morning, about a dozen folks gather at the Blue Street Senior Center in Fayetteville to have a meal and enjoy a few minutes of socializing. The food is provided at no cost by the Senior Nutrition Program through the Cumberland Council on Older Adults. For some of the regulars, it will be the best nutrition of their day and, for some, their best opportunity to relieve the loneliness that too often plagues those who live alone. Breaking through the chill of the morning with a contagious, warm smile is Geneva Purvis. Purvis, 86, is more than just a volunteer who helps prepare and serve the meals. She, like the other volunteers, also offers a listening ear, conversation and friendship to the people who come. Everyone there knows Purvis well, and it’s easy to understand just from her smile why everyone likes her. When Purvis’s late husband retired from the military, he, too, became an active volunteer. “When it was my time,” she says, “I knew I had to get out and find something to do.” Purvis had once worked in a school cafeteria, so she thought it made sense to help provide lunches for seniors. It must have been a good fit, since she’s donated more than 11,200 hours of her time to volunteering, between 2002 and 2014, when she was given the President’s Volunteer Service Lifetime Award. Since then, neither knee surgery nor shoulder problems have kept her from continuing her much-appreciated work. When all the lunches have been served that morning, Marcinea Canady, also 86, comes out from behind the counter to sit with the people by Jonathan Scott eating. She’s a retired nursing assistant who says she’s been Photography by helping others her whole life. Diana Matthews “Marcinea is always very respectful,” says Maybelle Hayes, 88, who came out for the group breakfast. “Just by being herself she helps us have a good day.” Marie Hines, an octogenarian sitting across the table, nods in agreement with Hayes. She appreciates the work that Purvis and Canaday are doing that morning on their behalf. Only a couple of years ago, she was a volunteer herself, delivering food with the Meals on Wheels program up in Rocky Mount.

The Joy in Giving Back

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Ready to Volunteer? •

Cumberland County: 910-484-0111, ext. 242

•

Harnett County: 910-814-6071

•

Hoke County: 910-875-8588

•

Lee County: www.volunteerlee.com

•

Montgomery County: 910-572-3757

•

Moore County: 910-215-0900

•

Richmond County: 910-997-4491

•

Robeson County: 910-671-3500

•

Scotland County: 910-277-2500

•

For volunteer opportunities throughout North Carolina, visit www.volunteernc.org

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“It gave me a reason to get up in the morning and get out of the house,” Hines says. Matching people who want to donate their time with agencies that sometimes desperately need help is the work of Rick Spell, program director of RSVP of Cumberland County. RSVP, which is an acronym for Retired and Senior Volunteer Program, is one of the largest volunteer networks in the nation, according to its parent organization, the Corporation for National and Community Service. “None of our volunteers consider themselves ‘retired seniors,’” Spell says, smiling. “A majority of them might be technically ‘retired,’ but it doesn’t mean the same thing it did 45 years ago. There was one lady we placed through RSVP who volunteered until she was 101. The only reason she stopped was because she moved from the area. And she never, ever considered herself to be a ‘senior.’” Spell helps to place volunteers with one or more of 17 Cumberland County organizations as diverse as Cape Fear Regional Theater and The CARE Clinic. Currently RSVP in Cumberland County has 144 volunteers, although the number could be several times greater than that depending on the official criteria used to count. “There’s a big range of how much time volunteers give,” Spell says. “For some, it’s just a few hours a week, and for others, it’s almost a full-time job. Whatever their hours, they’re all very committed to what they do.” Few volunteers in Cumberland County are as committed as Willie Wright, 80. After Wright retired as an Army colonel at Fort Bragg, his passionate love for people fueled him to give his time in a broad range of activities. Wright gave so much that in 2006 he was awarded the Nonprofit Leadership Award from the Cumberland Community Foundation. Wright’s volunteer resume includes serving as chairman of the Cumberland County Library board of trustees, working the door at the Cape Fear Regional Theater, and getting his hands dirty at the Cape Fear Botanical Gardens. But, according to Wright’s wife, Maxine, there’s even more to his volunteer activities, a 38

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side that doesn’t get as much attention. “Willie visits people in the hospital and goes to the homes of people who are sick, or those living alone,” Maxine Wright says. “The number of people whose lives he’s touched must be in the hundreds.” Connecting people to the right activities isn’t always a straightforward task either. “Of course, some people who retire want to continue doing the sort of work they did in their professional life,” Spell explains. “And there are some who might like to pursue a lifelong hobby or interest like gardening or music as a volunteer. I see plenty of people who want to make a 180-degree change from their profession. As retirees, they now want to do something that’s totally different.” In neighboring Lee County, the responsibility of linking the right person to the right opportunity has been taken on by the United Way of Lee County, led by executive director Kendra Martin. For the past four years, she’s helped administer www.volunteerlee.com, a user-friendly website, where anyone can explore volunteer opportunities in the county. Each of the 66 organizations has its own page explaining what it does, and what is required of-and offered to-potential volunteers. “The response has been tremendous,” Martin says. “We’re so glad we’ve been able to find so many volunteers. Right now there are about 1,900 people who have registered on the site.” With a group of volunteers that large, there is significant diversity in what motivates them. Take, for an example, Mark Neuman, Gerald Chappell and Dorothy Stacker, all volunteers with the Salvation Army of Lee County. Their backgrounds couldn’t be more different, but they share a common commitment for a common cause. “I finally got tired of the eight-to-five grind,” says Mark Neuman, 62, a Chicago-born manufacturing engineer. “Last year, I decided to scale back and do some consulting, but I felt it was time I gave back to the community. Faithbased charities were like a magnet to me.” Neuman started by volunteering at his church, Pocket Presbyterian in Sanford, then became involved with the local Christian United Outreach Center. When he learned that the local Salvation Army had an acute need, he decided to add that to the many other

volunteer activities he had found on the volunteerlee.com website. “Someone once told me to not overbook myself,” says Neuman as he finishes unloading the Salvation Army’s van full of donated food. “But I sincerely feel like we’re here to make a difference.” Helping Neuman pick up and unload boxes of donated food for those in need is Gerald Chappell. “When I graduated from high school, I was going the wrong way. I went into the military and it changed my life,” says Chappell, 67, an Atlanta native who came to Sanford in 2009 to help a friend in need. As a recent widower with no reason to go back to Atlanta, he decided to stay and has been dedicating time to the Salvation Army of Lee County one day a week, because it had at least a nominal connection with the military, which had been so influential in his own life. Dorothy Stacker, 56, a native of Sanford, also volunteers at the Salvation Army one day a week, something she’s done for the past 17 years in addition to her role as assistant pastor at Mission of Hope Church in Sanford. “I had hardships in my life,” Stacker says. “There was a time when I needed assistance, so I wanted to give back.” Stacker says she does just about anything that’s needed, including giving out hugs. Stacker’s dedicated efforts have been enough to persuade her sister and grandson to begin joining in on her volunteerism. Unlike the volunteer programs in Cumberland and Lee counties, Richmond County nonprofits have to reach out directly to their community to find volunteers and fill their community’s needs. Those wanting to volunteer seek and find agencies that depend on volunteers and find personal satisfaction in helping them. Sometimes a good match can come from something as low-tech as a barbecue dinner.

VOLUNTEERING HAS ITS BENEFITS

“H

ow would you like to live seven to 10 years longer, and live it in good health?” asks Rick Spell of RSVP of Cumberland County, as he begins a conversation with someone considering volunteering. “I can point to research that proves it. Volunteers are providing a tremendous service to our community but also a tremendous service to themselves.” According to a 2013 study by Carnegie Mellon University, adults 50 and older who volunteered on a regular basis were “less likely to develop high blood pressure than nonvolunteers.” High blood pressure has already been linked to heart disease, stroke and premature death. So far scientists haven’t been able to sort out the mechanisms that are at work, but the lead researcher of the study, Rodlescia Sneed, points to volunteering stimulating greater physical activity. People who volunteer also report lower levels of stress. Many other studies have shown volunteering helps prevent loneliness and depression. The Carnegie Mellon reserachers also found volunteers benefiting from as few as four hours a week, but, according to Harvard Women’s Health Watch, other studies point to benefits from as little as two hours a week. There is a catch, though. That same journal cites a study that says volunteers who live longer do so “only if their intentions were truly altruistic. In other words, they had to be volunteering to help others—not to make themselves feel better.”

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I knew I had to give back... —MYRA LEAK CONTINUED FROM PAGE 39

Linda Hatcher, 72, of Rockingham, received her degree later in life, and, after teaching, became a school librarian. About five years ago, she came across a public barbecue dinner, which, she found out, was an annual fundraiser for Richmond County Hospice. “I had no idea what they needed,” Hatcher says. “But I was brought up to give to others, so I asked what I could do. It turned out the answer was all sorts of things.” Hatcher plays the keyboard for patients and their families during the three hours a week she gives to Richmond County Hospice. It’s only one part of the volunteering that makes up her week, including driving to Aberdeen Elementary School, where she shares her experience as a school librarian. “Volunteering blesses me as much or more than anyone else,” Hatcher says. Wanda Coble, 64, also a Rockingham native, knew very little about Richmond County Hospice until her husband’s cancer was diagnosed as terminal. He was being treated out of town and Coble decided to bring him home for his final days. “I was so overwhelmed,” Coble says of her hospice experience. “The people were so sweet. I thought I was surrounded by angels.” When the hospital where Coble worked as a pediatric LPN closed her department in 2014, she was ready to retire but also ready to give back. She contacted Richmond County Hospice and asked if she could volunteer with the organization that helped her through what she considered the worst time of her life. Now, she provides relief to family caretakers, knowing all too well the burdens they carry.

According to Richmond County Hospice volunteer coordinator Lisa O’Neal, her organization has about 50 active volunteers. Some visit patients in their homes, some offer companionship to patients in the facility, and some, like Coble, give respite to caregivers. Others help with office and other administrative duties. Hospice provides volunteers a four-night training session to prepare for the sensitive issues involved. Myra Leak, 57, has been volunteering with Richmond County Hospice for a year. Like Coble, hospice touched her life through the death of a loved one. Back in 1996, Leak called hospice when her mother was dying. “The people who came were so caring and loving and supportive, they were like family members almost instantly,” Leak says. “I knew I had to give back what they gave my family. I knew that when I retired, volunteering with them was going to be first on my bucket list.” Leak, now a retired speech pathologist, visits a hospice patient on Tuesdays and Thursdays and makes bereavement calls from the hospice office. Calls are scheduled at three-month intervals after a patient’s death to check in with family members. “It’s phenomenal to hear what people say,” Leak says. “They tell me how hospice makes an unbearable situation bearable. I get goosebumps thinking about it.” Volunteers inevitably say that they receive more than they give, and they want to encourage others to also volunteer. It seems as if all these volunteers have something else in common. They are focused on what they do—what they can offer—far more than on what benefit they are receiving, and as so many simply say, “giving something back.”

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Energetic & interactive workshops Presentations Outdoor recreation Leadership building exercises

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Welcome

Career by Carrie Frye Photography by Katherine Clark

he warmest welcome in golf—established in 1986 and still going strong—comes in the jubilant hello and bright smiles of the two revered front door attendants, Larry Goins and Frolin Hatcher, at the historic Pinehurst No. 2. Like the lush greens, Rolex clock and golf statues, Goins and Hatcher are known landmarks. If you have walked the path to the clubhouse, arrived on the bus from the Carolina Hotel or driven up for valet service to play a round or have a meal, you have most likely been on the receiving end of a cheerful, “Hey, how are you?” delivered by both Goins and Hatcher. This pair works in tandem, hoisting golf bags, greeting guests, parking cars and golf carts and pointing those overcome with excitement to be at the renowned course in the right direction. Hatcher has spent more than 50 years in some form of hospitality at Pinehurst Resort, but 49 of those have been at his current post at No. 2. “It doesn’t feel like 50 years, and I don’t feel like I’m 75 years old either,” says Hatcher, laughing. “Once you get into it, the time just goes by. I think this is the ideal job for me. I love people, and keeping them smiling, that’s our deal.” Six days a week from 6 o’clock in the morning until 1 o’clock in the afternoon, making people smile is their dual objective, although it is yearround for Goins, while Hatcher prefers to take the winter season off. “Spring is here if I am here,” Hatcher says, smiling. “I am not coming back until the weather is warm.” “I usually take two weeks off in January and February, but this may be the last winter I work, maybe,” Goins adds, “but spring has sprung if Frolin is back.” In the early 1960s, Hatcher was in his 20s and just beginning his hospitality career at the resort when an encounter with a fellow employee changed his course. CONTINUED PAGE 44

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“I was working over at the Carolina Hotel,” Hatcher recalls, “and there was a guy who had been here 50 years, and he told me, ‘We need a guy up front, and you don’t have to work at night, and you can make pretty good money, so why don’t you come and try out for it?’ He told me he was going to recommend me. They hired me right on the spot, and I’ve stayed right here. I have been digging around and fooling around here ever since.” Goins, too, began his career on the hotel side before transitioning to No. 2. “I started at the Holly Inn and Carolina Hotel when I was real young and just met a lot of nice people who made me feel like this is the job for me. I have been working with him here for 31 years,” says Goins with a playful nod to his partner. “We know each other in and out. I don’t ever get tired of Frolin. We don’t ever get tired of each other. He learns from me, and I learn a lot from him.” Standing out front, these two gentlemen are not weather dependent, unlike the game the guests are coming out to play, nor are they weary of any April showers coming their way. “Every season is new,” Goins says. “It is always real refreshing to come back to work… rain, shine, sleet or snow. A spring day is my favorite, but every day is a beautiful day. We even love it when it rains.

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We have raincoats and umbrellas, and if our feet get wet, we just put on dry socks.” As they help guests with all of their golf gear, it might be surprising that neither Goins nor Hatcher plays golf. “I have never played,” Hatcher says. “Never wanted to play, seen people complaining about their game, so I never picked it up. I like to fish and get out there, just you and the water, fishing. Now, I enjoy that.” “I like the way people are interested in golf and see how happy they get playing it,” Goins adds. “Well, I tried to play, but it wasn’t for me, but I like seeing others enjoy playing.” All of those players—amateur and professionals— have left impressions and fond memories with both men over the course of their careers. “Lee Trevino,” remembers Hatcher. “He said, ‘Come on, let’s go and get some frozen yogurt.’ And we told him we couldn’t do that and that we had to work.” “Trevino brought it to us, brought us each frozen yogurt,” Goins adds. “And (Jack) Nicklaus was up there hitting balls, getting ready to tee off, and gave me his keys and asked me to go down to his car, because he needed some more golf balls,” Hatcher recalls. “I went down there and got him his golf balls, and he smiled and said, ‘These all might not last out on No. 2.’” CONTINUED PAGE 46

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“We’re like Jack Nicklaus and Arnold Palmer, a great pair,” Goins adds. “Arnold Palmer was a great guy, but Fuzzy Zoehler really stands out for me. He gave me a lot of good advice for this job, telling me to stay jolly.” The advice must have worked on both men, as their infectious smiles and laughter resonate consistently with the patrons of the resort. “If you see someone having a bad day, you grab one of their partners and ask to see if there’s something you can do, they will tell you, and you do it, and that works,” Goins explains. “I have had people come over and be mad, but when they leave here, me and Larry got them laughing,” Hatcher adds. “And they will come back and tell us how much they enjoyed themselves. We just try to make them happy and do the extras when they get off the bus, speak to them, shake their hands, tell them we’re glad they’re here. And when they leave, we tell them to be sure and come back and see us, and they do.” Guests filing by call out to them by name with more waves, smiles and hugs, as the genuine spirits and generosity of these men shine through for all to see. If you ask them, it is their love for people and spirituality that is the key to their longevity. “If I’m having a bad day, I talk to the man upstairs and it’s outta here,” Goins says. “I thank Him every day, and as long as I thank Him, He is going to handle the rest.” “I just love people,” Hatcher adds in agreement. “When I was young, 17 or 18, I turned a convertible over in Virginia and didn’t get a scratch. My mother was real religious, and she told me the next morning that God spared my life last night, that I had to thank Him, because He had something for me to do, and that I had to figure out what that was. That has been on me ever since, so I want to help people.” That work of helping people continues. Every new day brings new visitors, players and plenty of old friends out to the storied course, so the greetings and smiles keep coming. “What’s truly unique about Frolin and Larry is that they are the first faces our guests see, and it is remarkable the feelings everyone has for them,” says Alex Podlogar, media relations manager at Pinehurst Resort. “Golfers start and end their visit to No. 2 with this walk and are always welcomed by Larry and Frolin. They mean a lot to us, and they are part of the Pinehurst tradition.”

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Honoring World War II veterans Series «»

reese maxey

by Jonathan Scott Photography by Diana Matthews

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ne afternoon in early spring 1945, Motor Sergeant Reese Maxey was driving the lead truck in a convoy of American soldiers who were part of what was then called the Colored Army. Even though they were fighting the same enemy in the same war, Maxey had very little contact with his white counterparts since joining the armed forces in November 1941. President Truman would eventually order the American military integrated, but the president’s Executive Order wouldn’t be issued until three years later. The end of war was coming. Maxey and his fellow soldiers knew it, but that didn’t mean their lives weren’t still at risk virtually every day. Since wading ashore at Normandy Beach in June 1944, there were days when Maxey wasn’t sure he’d live to see the sun go down. And that day, when he was leading the convoy through western Germany, might have been one of those days. As a motor sergeant, Maxey didn’t always have to carry a weapon. But that afternoon, he had a pistol tucked between his legs as he sat in the driver’s seat, constantly on the lookout. Part of his reward for being so good at his job was to be in the lead truck as he and his men drove food and supplies to the troops. The irony was, Maxey’s eyesight wasn’t the best. He might have blamed himself for it since, in a way, it had been partly his own fault. Still, his safety and that of the others depended on his sight. CONTINUED PAGE 50

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“

”

When you see war on TV, you only see what they want you to see. War is terrible. Terrible.

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—REESE MAXEY

As they came around a bend, Maxey could see a group of people near the side of the road in the distance. He strained his eyes to make out who they were—and how much danger the convoy was in. Since leaving the hospital in England, his eyesight had been better, but it was still not perfect. Maxey had studied French for three years in high school back in Dobbins Heights, North Carolina. As a teenager he didn’t know that he would someday soon be in France putting his fluency to use. It helped him communicate with the locals while the 529th Unit was sleeping in pup tents in the French countryside. Thanks to his French, Maxey and some of his buddies were able to get hold of what the French called contrabande, moonshine. It was powerful stuff. Much too powerful. Drinking it nearly blinded him and landed him the hospital in England for 12 days. He was the only AfricanAmerican soldier recuperating in a medical wing of 60 men. When he was discharged, someone told him, “Don’t ever come back.” That memory was fresh in his mind as the convoy progressed. Maxey could see that the Germans gathered by the side of the road were young, but in the later days of the war, the Germans had taken to drafting teenagers. He slowed down and tightened his grip on the pistol in his lap. He had plenty of training in using firearms, but he hadn’t had much cause to use it. The half-dozen trucks behind him stopped. Had he led the convoy into a trap? Maxey opened his door and, steadying his hand, pointed the pistol at the children. Now he was close enough to see that there were girls as well as boys, maybe six or eight of them all together. He raised his arm to make sure his bad eyesight wouldn’t cause him to do something he’d regret. He fired above the children’s heads. Then another, even higher. As he emptied the pistol, the children scattered away. Maxey smiled and waved at the driver in the truck behind him. All of them, including the children, were going to live to see the sun go down that day. After the war, Maxey lived for a while in Brooklyn, but he eventually returned to Dobbins Heights. Maxey’s eyesight continued to deteriorate throughout his life. In 2003, an operation at Duke Hospital allowed him to see and even read again. At 98, Maxey has lived to see a great many suns go down and will no doubt live to see many more.

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Carolina Conversations with “60 Minutes” Correspondent and

New York Times Best-selling Author

LESLEY STAHL by Carrie Frye Photography by Ken Pao & Dave Lauridsen

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unday night viewers know Lesley Stahl as the “60 Minutes” Emmy award-winning broadcast journalist now in her 26th season at the top-rated CBS news program. She’s also a former White House correspondent for the Carter, Reagan and George H. W. Bush administrations. However, it is the role of grandmother that changed her perspective and led to her to write her New York Times best-selling book, “Becoming Grandma: The Joys and Science of the New Grandparenting” last year. Filled with an overwhelming joy and love for her first granddaughter, Jordan, Stahl approached the book with her investigative-reporting skills, looking for the answers as to why and how this role is affecting her and her fellow baby boomers. From her CBS office in New York City, Stahl, 75, discusses her research, her hope in reaching her daughter’s generation in their consideration of their mothers and mothers-in-law, her most difficult interview and the legacy she wants to leave with her granddaughters.

s ONC: Tell us about your decision to write and the journey that led to “Becoming Grandma.”

LS: It’s kind of a funny story of how I got to write the book. The publisher of Blue Rider Press used to be with Simon & Schuster, which published my first book (“Reporting Live”), and he asked me if I would write a book about “60 Minutes.” And I said to him, “I am not crazy. How can I write a book about a place where I’m actually still working (laughs) and be honest, because they’ll fire you, and if you’re not going to be honest, it would be pretty dull,” so I said, “That’s ridiculous.” We had just had lunch, and we’re old friends. I was at his wedding, and I always ask about his kids, and I started to talk about my granddaughter at the time. And after I didn’t shut up for a long time, he said, “You know, that would make a book.” And I said, “What?” And he said, “Grandmothers, becoming a grandmother.” I thought, “Oh, no…” And he said, “Do me a favor and just sleep on it.” And I did, and it kept coming back into my head. Then I began to really wonder if it was a book. My experience alone wouldn’t make a book. I have this ladies lunch group, and I realized three of the women in the group out of five are stepgrandmothers, and they talked about their stepgrandchildren in exactly the same terms that I was talking about my new grandchild. And I thought, “Well that’s interesting, I wonder what that’s about.” Then I remembered that I had done a story about a couple of young girls who lived in a place called Grandmothers’ House in the Bronx, and I thought there are a couple of interesting avenues beyond 52

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being crazy in love with your grandchildren. I began to map out how many different chapters there could be, and I sat at my computer and got to about 10 chapters. So I thought, “There is a book here, and I’m interested in it.” Are you surprised at how the book has been received or the audience it has reached?

I am actually not that surprised. I first thought, “Is there a book there and would I enjoy working on it for a couple of years, because books take years, and is there an audience?” And when I looked into the demographics and realized that the baby boomer women are becoming grandmothers now, there is and will continue to be a huge bulge in the population, so I thought there is a big audience out there. Interestingly, I really hoped that there would be more of an audience my daughter’s age who would want to be read it, because it is very much about the mother-daughter relationship or the mother-in-law and daughter relationship. Were you relieved that your biochemistry findings in your research validated your own overwhelming feelings of grandmother love?

I had met Louann Brizedine long before the idea of the book came to me. I had been asked to interview her at a convention, so I read her book, “The Female Brain,” to get ready for that interview, and it just stayed with me. It is full of unbelievable factoids. She, in her book, talked about the chemistry of mothers when they have a baby, and I thought, “Wonder if she’s ever done any work on grandmothers?”

I called her, and she was so lovely and gracious. She gave me that tidbit, and I was thrilled and excited, because it was the answer. I always thought that the biochemistry would be the very last thing in the book, like finishing the quest to try and find out what is this emotion I am having and then travel, travel, travel, and put it at the end as here’s the answer. It just didn’t come together that way though, so I put it right up front. I didn’t realize that all of us go through these crazy-in-love feelings, so that was important for me to nail down.

How do you feel baby boomers are changing grandparenthood overall?

Technology and economics are really leading the way. There’s a whole explanation of how the baby boomer generation is really the only generation with a lot of money, so we have been stepping in to help with grandchildren financially, and there’s a statistic about how grandparents are spending seven times more on their grandchildren than they did just five years ago. And that’s astonishing. Seven times more. CONTINUED PAGE 54

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is the best part of that, I think, and giving your time, energy and wisdom to them is a pretty good project.

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 53

We are doing all kinds of things that are not just buying toys and books. We are doing big-ticket items and sending Since you’ve interviewed countless world leaders them to school, paying doctor bills and all of that. That throughout your amazing career, it truly resonated shows how economics and technology are leading the with me that making a phone call to your son-inway, because if we don’t live near our grandchildren, we law’s mother was the hardest interview you knew you had to do. Can you talk about the call and can see them with FaceTime and Skype. I just think baby what made it so hard for you? boomers with our emphasis on staying young and healthy Unbelievable. We really hadn’t been friends until then, have more energy, and we want to be involved in our and I actually didn’t know how to write about our grandchildren’s lives. We’re being drawn in economically relationship. I had a lot of trouble with it. My boss asked and by technology beyond just a physical need to be me about it, because he had read the book for me and with our grandchildren. We have the urge to spend time gave me some of his wisdom, and he said, “ You don’t with them and be involved in their lives in some way to talk much about the other grandparents.” I said, “I don’t raise them. And for a lot of us, we do have the resources, know how to.” And he gave and we want to live near me the idea of interviewing them. If we live near them, her, which turned out to be inevitably, both parents are If you are thinking in terms of brilliant but so emotional. going to work today, and they And then we became friends, what am I going to do after I retire, need really good childcare and she even gave me a that they can trust. There’s being with grandchildren is the book party. We are such nobody you can trust more best part of that ... giving your time, good friends now. Clearing than the grandparents, even the air and actually talking energy and wisdom to them if you don’t get along with about it, I never would have them, you can still trust is a pretty good project. thought to do that, never in a them as caretakers for the million years, if I hadn’t been grandchildren, because they writing the book and had it —LESLEY STAHL love them so much. suggested to me. It just broke everything open. It turned Our magazine’s tagline is out to be not only good for the book but also good for “Navigating Your Second 50,” but I love the concept the grandchildren, good for the family, good for her and you mention in the book of “The Third 30,” so can good for me. you expand on that idea and what it means to you? That concept came to me from Linda Fried, who is Can you offer any advice to help other families the dean of the Mailman School of Public Health at bridge that gap with the in-laws in their own lives? Columbia (University.) I had met her at a conference at Just talk about it. It never entered my mind to do it, the Milken Institute, which runs a program for the next and I am sure there will be situations where it doesn’t chapter, what you do when you retire. She talked about work out and a conversation could turn out to be bad, how many people in public health are working on this but I think if you can try it delicately, it’s worth it. If idea of what do you do when you retire and you still there is tension, and there can be a lot of tension in have another third of your life ahead of you. So when I this (in-law) relationship, sometimes there’s a jealousy got back to New York, I arranged to interview her for the in this relationship between two sets of grandparents, book. She introduced the 30-30-30 idea to me. My ears and sometimes, there are four sets of grandparents. popped up, and I thought, “That’s new and interesting A lot happened in that conversation. I just think we and newsworthy.” She became a big part of the book. understood each other on a different level, in other Instead of ending on the biochemistry, I decided to end words, walking in each other’s shoes, and we hadn’t even on that concept. If you are thinking in terms of what thought to do that before. am I going to do after I retire, being with grandchildren

“

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”

In “Becoming Grandma,” you explore some amazing concepts like the Hope Meadows community in Illinois, a planned intergenerational community containing foster and adoptive parents, children and older adults that works to support each others’ needs, utilizing the older adults as surrogate grandparents helping with childcare and more. Do you see these types of communities becoming more prevalent?

That concept is spreading. There’s one in Oregon, one in Massachusetts, one in New Orleans and one they are trying to start in Washington, D.C. Each one of them has a slightly different emphasis. There are all kinds of programs I didn’t get into that I researched. There are programs where retired people can help with childcare, help with reading to kids, help with parenting, and just doing it in your community. There are programs within the schools that provide the opportunity for baby boomers to become surrogate grandparents. I saw a program where an elementary school brings the students to an assisted living community for an afterschool program, and the kids and the residents play and spend their afternoons together. The reason is the bulge in population of the people older than 65 and their health. They’re in good health. It is a wonderful thing for everybody, all three generations. It’s uplifting and improves health, and, obviously, the children benefit from it, because children need grandparents. If they don’t have or get to see their own grandparents, surrogates, as programs like Hope Meadows demonstrate, are wonderful. Parents need help with childcare, so it is a win-win-win, all the way around. I loved Hope Meadows. I was just blown away. Over the course of the book, were you still writing when your second granddaughter Chloe was born?

Yes! I agreed to write the book and was taking notes on everything. My daughter was trying to tell me she was pregnant, and I just wrote the whole thing down. She was saying, “Jordan is going to have a baby sister.” I was able to record what Jordan was saying about the new baby coming. All of that happened in the course of me researching and writing the book, so I think there is a sort of presence to it, almost like a diary in a way. How do you keep that balance of being fair when there are two grandchildren now?

You think it is going to be hard, but it’s not. First of all, they get along pretty well. They are very different, but

you find that you just adore them both, and it is so very interesting. I only had one child, so I never went through the idea that you’re going to love two different people at the same level but maybe differently. Is there something you never thought you would do that you’ve done, like crawling inside the fort in the bedroom or turning your New York apartment into a toy land when you put the child-size kitchen together for Chloe?

It’s still there (laughs). Everyone loves it, and we have a little dollhouse in the back. I always wanted to be a grandmother, even when it was quite too early to want it. And I’m just not disappointed. Often you have your dream, and it disappoints you, but this one is not disappointing. Any vacation plans for this summer when you are off from “60 Minutes” with Jordan and Chloe?

We always spend July together every year. We always go to Nantucket. I haven’t seen them in awhile. So, for the weekend, I’m getting on an airplane and going to see them. My husband can’t go because he is having deep brain stimulation for his Parkinson’s, his last one of the three procedures and won’t be able to travel yet. I just miss them too much, so I’m going to go see them for the weekend, for two days. I know it’s nutty, but I have enough miles that I can do it. You mentioned the healing power of grandchildren and how it seemed to help with the progression of your husband’s Parkinson’s disease. Did you still find that to be the case?

I can only tell you that Parkinson’s progresses inevitably, and you can do everything possible to make the quality of life good. The boxing program he participates in does that, and the deep brain stimulation is going to do that, and it has already had a huge impact. None of it slows the progression of the disease, but being with his grandchildren gives him so much joy and happiness. Lastly, what do you want Chloe and Jordan to think of when they think of you?

I want them to subconsciously know that there is someone in this world who loves them more than they love anybody else, except their mother (laughs). I think children need to know that there are people who just love them and think they are the most special, beautiful, smart, nice, kind, fabulous person who ever lived, and I want them to feel that. I want them to feel that they are loved. APRIL 2017 |

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Volunteering with

VALOR by Michelle Goetzl Photography by Diana Matthews

erriam-Webster defines valor as the “strength of mind or spirit that enables a person to encounter danger with firmness.” The men and women who serve in our military are the embodiment of the word valor; it is their way of life. Every year at the Valor Games Southeast, men and women display their valor by competing in the games or by being one of the invaluable volunteers that make the event possible. For the past five years, Bridge II Sports and the Department of Veterans Affairs have come together to hold Valor Games Southeast. This three-day event in Chapel Hill, May 22-25—the week between Armed Forces Day and Memorial Dayinvites disabled veterans and members of the Armed Forces to compete with each other in events like archery, cycling, air rifle and indoor rowing as a way to build self-confidence and gain a sense of camaraderie through athletic competition. When a veteran’s life is affected by a disability, whether through combat or at home, their valor is put to the test. Bridge II Sports is a North Carolina nonprofit organization founded to “create opportunities for children and adults who are physically challenged to play team and individual sports ... thereby helping them to discover tenacity, confidence, self-esteem and the joy of finding the player within.”

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Want to volunteer with the Valor Games Southeast or Bridge II Sports? Call 866-880-2742 or visit www.bridge2sports.org .

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CONTINUED FROM PAGE 56

In 2012, Ashley Thomas, executive director of Bridge II Sports, was approached by the Veterans Affairs office in Washington, D.C. about hosting the Valor Games Southeast due to their longtime work with military family members and as a Paralympic Sport Club. She put a plan together on how to implement the games and a partnership was initiated. “I feel so honored to be part of the recovery after injury for our military members,” Thomas says. The Valor Games Southeast is not just about the athletes who come to participate. This May, the event aims to have about 125 athletes with a wide range of ages and disabilities taking part. The games would not be possible without volunteers. “Valor Games 2017 will take just under 500 volunteers,” Thomas says. “Volunteers do all sorts of jobs, from helping train the athletes prior to the games, helping in various ways during the sporting events, and with food set-up and cleanup. “One great thing we do is train all volunteers in Traumatic Brain Injury/Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, enabling them to be fantastic volunteers at Valor Games Southeast as well as within our communities. TBI and PTSD take time to heal. As a community, we can be part of the long-term recovery.” Mickey Strater, of Greensboro, has been a volunteer with Bridge II Sports since before the first Valor Games Southeast. Each week, Strater and other members of the Guilford Bowhunters Association travel to Burlington to work with veterans in archery. “For two hours out of your week, you become an instructor, assistant and a friend to each veteran that enters the range,” Strater says. Strater, an Army veteran who served two tours of duty in Vietnam, looks forward to the weekly class at Buttermilk Creek Outfitters, whether working with the veterans or the younger participants from the broader Bridge II Sports community. “This is our future,” he says, citing the great therapy and exercise archery can be, as he helps a participant set up her shot and takes in the joyous smile that comes after hitting the target. “That’s what it is all about.” Durham resident J.R. Stone also volunteers his time with Bridge II Sports and the Valor Games Southeast.

“Mickey and I go all over the state teaching archery,” Stone explains. “Five or six years ago, one of our members [of the Guilford Bowhunters Association] got associated with Ashley Thomas, and we did an event in Durham. They wheeled a Wounded Warrior out on a cot, and all he could move was his hands. They helped him set up his bow, and when he released the arrow, he hit his target. It was really cold that day, and I put some hot hands around him and asked if he was OK. He gave me a thumbs-up, and his smile was so big. I was hooked ever since. “Bridge II Sports and the Valor Games help people assimilate back into the public, to get them on the road to recovery,” Stone continues. “The games and sports as a whole bring the vets out of themselves. It lets them relate to people outside of their family. Volunteering here is something that once you get started, you keep coming back. We all look forward to it.” John Book, an air rifle expert from Durham, has another take on why he volunteers. “I’m an amputee myself, and I like paying it forward,” he says. “I’m really hoping to have an impact wherever I volunteer and pay it forward.” Book has been volunteering with the games since its beginning and also throughout the state with firearms education. “I work with the North Carolina Wildlife Resource Commission and teach basic hunter education, firearms handling and archery. With Wounded Warriors, I help put on an event in Coldwell, and every year, we do a turkey hunt in April and a deer hunt in November.” Book, too, urges others to come out and volunteer. “You solve differences by communicating with others,” he says. “Whether through donations or active involvement, I hope to see a society that will help their neighbors. I really enjoy volunteering.” The Valor Games Southeast theme for 2017 is “Life Again,” a fitting title for both the participants and the many volunteers involved. “Everyone has things that they are dealing with, and when you find others who are dealing with the same issues, it makes it a lot easier,” says Brad Rosell, Bridge II Sports marketing manager. “The Valor Games brings it all together.”

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GREY MATTER See Grey Matter Puzzle Answers on Page 63

Again Bacon Beside Blame Broke Cubes

Depth Discussions Ending Erase Furnace Grand

Gripped Highway Horned Issue Italy Knees

Label Lasts Leaves Limbs Liquid Loose

29. ___ de deux 32. Bore 35. Brews 36. Big end 38. “___ we having fun yet?” 39. Band booking 40. Women‚Äôs loose gowns 41. Bug 42. “The Three Faces of ___” 43. Frothy 44. 100 centavos 45. Brief brawl 47. Alkaline liquid 48. Assail 49. Song and dance, e.g. 51. “Fudge!” 53. Sensible 57. Bon mot 61. Cuckoos 62. Unorthodox or radical 64. Barfly’s binge 65. Musical show 66. Wizard 67. “Green Gables” girl 68. Swiss capital 69. Checked out

DOWN ACROSS 1. Au ___ 5. Tender spots 10. Clearasil target 14. “Cast Away” setting

15. Village 16. Fizzles out 17. Journey 19. Above 20. Less taxing

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21. One wife at a time 23. Come together 25. Honoree’s spot 26. Have second thoughts

1. Snowman prop 2. ___ Minor 3. Misfortunes 4. System of rule 5. Mixes up 6. Electrical unit 7. Be itinerant

Mathematical Model Motor Names Noise Notes Notion Opportunity Proof Reeds Reins Riots Roast Route Signed Slender Spain Steel Suit-case Tanks Tension Thorn TWINS Unlike Video Warned

8. “Cogito ___ sum” 9. Devote, as time 10. Slowly, to a conductor 11. A city like Rome and the Vatican 12. Advertising sign 13. Catch a glimpse of 18. Back 22. “Bellefleur” author 24. A helix 26. Earnings 27. Breathing 28. Plant life 30. Anxious 31. Put (away) 33. Clear, as a disk 34. Cache 36. “A pox on you!” 37. Pewter containing 80% tin 40. Former capital of Japan 44. Pseudonym used by authors 46. Sad; sorrowful 48. Two-masted vessel 50. Eat or drink rapidly 52. Montezuma, e.g. 53. Pro ___ 54. Soon, to a bard 55. Affirm 56. ___ lamp 58. Civil War side, with “the” 59. Halftime lead, e.g. 60. Cattail, e.g. 63. Mother Teresa, for one

Introducing

“T

he Memory Cafe concept provides a social experience for those who have dementia and their family member. A husband and wife can come by the café and socialize with other couples who are sharing a similar journey.”

A welcoming place for individuals with Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, brain disorders and mild cognitive impairment and their family member or friend.

Questions?

910.585.6757 info@aosfcare.org AOSFCare.org

lp?

-Amy Natt, President AOS & Friends Care

o W E Do T

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 26 | 2:30-4 P.M. Drop-in Thyme & Place Cafe | 155 Hall Ave. | Southern Pines The Memory Cafe is a drop-in event and open to the community, providing a safe, understanding and compassionate environment to interact with others and enjoy a cup of coffee and great conversation. *Those with dementia must be accompanied by a family member or friend. Hosted by Thyme & Place Cafe, coffee and tea are provided, and light fare will be available for purchase. No registration required.

FRESH. LOCAL . SOUT HERN G O U R M E T. R e s ta u R a n t , P e R s o n a l C h e f & C at e R i n g

Ask about our Catering Services

LUNCH

Mon-Sat: 11-2:30

DINNER

Wed-Thur: 4-9:30 Fri-Sat: 4-10 Reserve your table today! 910.695.3663

CATERING • Business/Corporate • Special Occasion • Personal Chef Services • All ABC Permits

132 West Pennsylvania Ave Belvedere Courtyard | Southern Pines

RhettsRPCC.com

APRIL 2017 |

OutreachNC.com 61

life NUTRITION

Slicing Up Heart-Healthy Benefits of Cheese by Laura Buxenbaum, MPH, RD, LDN

id you know that heart disease is the nation’s leading killer of both men and women and claims more lives than all forms of cancer combined? Luckily, through lifestyle changes such as losing weight, exercising and improving our diet, we can reduce our risk of heart disease. Dr. Robert Eckel, past president of the American Heart Association and committee member for the USDA Dietary Guidelines, says, “Eating a healthy diet is not about good foods and bad foods in isolation from the rest of your diet-it’s about the overall diet.” Adequate physical activity and abstinence from smoking are also crucial lifestyle approaches in the interest of disease prevention, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Saturated Fat and Heart Disease

Let’s talk heart health and food, specifically cheese. Most everybody loves cheese, but it gets some bad press in terms of heart health. Most health professionals place an emphasis on avoiding saturated fats such as those in cheese. However, as is always the case with evolving science, we don’t know what we don’t know until we learn something new. Saturated fat has long been demonized as “the fat to fear,” because it was assumed that all foods containing this type of fat equally raise our levels of LDL (the so-called “bad cholesterol” in our blood), which is at the root of heart disease and strokes. Saturated fat is like a family of fats and there are a number of different kinds of fats in that family. While these fats share some common characteristics, nutrition scientists have discovered that these fats function in unique ways based on their specific type and the food source. The science shows that there are different structures of these fats in different foods, and that their structure, along with the presence of other nutrients within a given food, determines their function in the body. In other words, we can no longer label all saturated fat as a single nutrient to be avoided; we must look at the specific type of saturated fat and the type of food where it’s found.

Buxenbaum, MPH, RD, LDN, assistant director of nutrition affairs of the Southeast United Dairy Industry Association, Inc., can be reached at 800-343-4693 or lbuxenbaum@sedairy.org .

OutreachNC.com | APRIL 2017

GREY MATTER ANSWERS Cheesy Perks

A recent study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition concluded that “cheese, despite its high content of saturated fat, has a neutral or even beneficial effect on total cholesterol and/or LDL cholesterol” when other dietary factors align with healthy eating guidelines. A 2014 article published in the same journal also indicated a profound finding: The calcium in cheese may literally be reducing the amount of saturated fat in the cheese that our bodies absorb. Let’s not forget the often-overlooked fact that sometimes heart disease and strokes, like any diet-related conditions, are not entirely about what we’re eating, but also about what we’re missing. Abundant scientific research supports the importance of eating foods rich in minerals such as potassium and calcium for protection of our heart and blood vessels. Dairy foods like cheese are rich sources of these essential nutrients. This may help explain why a meta-analysis published in 2014 concluded that it’s plausible that full-fat dairy foods, including milk, cheese and yogurt, do not contribute to cardiovascular disease risk, and indeed may be inversely associated with it. Since we usually don’t eat foods in isolation, we should consider each choice in the context of all the nutrients one food has to offer. Perhaps cheese, with its high-quality protein and beneficial vitamins and minerals, provides more benefits than was previously acknowledged when it’s consumed as part of a healthy-eating pattern. The concept of “everything in moderation” is all about how we can derive both benefit and joy from our eating experiences ... and that’s something you can take to heart.

SUDOKU

WORD SEARCH

Big Bowl Cheese Dip Recipe courtesy of Southeast United Dairy Industry Association

• ½ cup diced onion • 1 cup regular or non-alcoholic beer • 2 cups shredded cheddar cheese • 2 cups shredded pepper jack cheese • 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour • 1 ½ tablespoons taco seasoning • 1-2 tablespoons chopped chipotle pepper in adobo sauce • 1 cup sour cream • Baked tortilla chips, roasted potato wedges or fresh veggies, for dipping

lace onion and beer in a heavy mediumsize pan. Heat to boiling. Reduce heat and simmer 3-4 minutes. In large bowl, combine cheeses, flour and taco seasoning. Slowly add handfuls to hot beer until melted. Repeat until all the cheese is used. Stir in chipotle pepper and sour cream. Serve with baked tortilla chips, roasted potato wedges or fresh veggies for dipping.

CROSSWORD

APRIL 2017 |

OutreachNC.com 63

ASSISTED LIVING

RESOURCE MARKETPLACE

DID YOU KNOW? April is IBS Awareness Month

Nydia Brooks Executive Director

Assisted Living & Memory Care 190 Fox Hollow Road Pinehurst, NC 28374 | 910.695.0011 mnbrooks@5ssl.com

www.FoxHollowSeniorLiving.com

• Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) is a disorder characterized by abdominal pain or discomfort, and altered bowel habit (chronic or recurrent diarrhea, constipation, or both). • The exact cause of IBS is not known. Symptoms may result from a disturbance in the way the gut, brain and nervous system interact. This can cause changes in normal bowel movement and sensation. • Probiotic products based on bifidobacteria and certain combinations of probiotics have shown some benefit to relieve pain and bloating. Source: www.aboutibs.org

ASSISTED LIVING

Open Arms Retirement Center

Assisted Living | Memory Care Music & Memory Certified 612 Health Drive | Raeford 910-875-3949 ASSISTED LIVING

CARE MANAGEMENT

The Experts in Aging Well Ready to plan for your second 50? Let our resources & experience help you maintain your independence.

Our Aging Life CareTM Professionals provide a client-centered approach to guide families to decisions that ensure quality of care and optimal life.

CAREGIVER REGISTRY

2 WAKE COUNTY LOCATIONS Residential Assisted Living & Alzheimer’s Care 1810 N. New Hope Road Raleigh, NC 27604 | 919.250.0255 901 Spring Arbor Court Apex, NC 27502 | 919.303.9990

We can help! Visit us online

AOSNC.com

DENTAL CARE

The right dentist can make all the difference. A Network of Private-Duty Caregivers Serving South Central NC

910.692.0683 info@AOSNC.com

305 Page Road | Pinehurst, NC

910.295.1010

www.SpringArborLiving.com

AgingOutreachServices.com

www.WellenerDental.com

FINANCIAL

HOME CARE AGENCY

HOSPITALS

senior health services

75 Branches Serving You Across North Carolina BUSINESS | PERSONAL | HOME WEALTH | INSURANCE

LOCALFIRSTBANK.COM Member FDIC |

Serving South Central NC

Equal Housing Lender

OutreachNC.com | APRIL 2017

Moore • Hoke • Cumberland Robeson • Harnett • Lee Counties

910.246.1011

Nurse aides, companions & registered nursing services sjp.org

a full range of primary care for men and women ages 60 and older. Our physicians have special training in treating seniors and employ the most current information, treatments, medications and practices for disease prevention and diagnosis.

(910) 615-1630

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s National Kite Month...

Go fly a kite!

HOSPITALS

HVAC

Experience FirstHealth Quality Your Full-Service Residential Heating and Air Conditioning Specialists Serving the Sandhills since 1953

910.778.5534

www.firsthealth.org

www.OneHourAirCarolinas.com

ADVERTISE YOUR BUSINESS

NONPROFIT SERVICES

lp?

A nonprofit dedicated to tC o an W E Do T serving Direct Care Needs and supporting Programs and Events to benefit those affected by dementia in Moore County. For more information, contact: 910.585.6757 | info@aosfcare.org

RELOCATION SERVICES

910.692.9609 info@OutreachNC.com SUPPORT GROUPS STATEWIDE

Family Caregivers & Adult Children

SUPPORT GROUP TUESDAY, APRIL 25 6-7 P.M. PITTMAN GROVE BAPTIST CHURCH

Supporting NC families for three decades Find a support group alznc.org | 800.228.8738

4921 Pittman Grove Church Rd | Raeford Group meets on last Tuesday of each month. For more information, contact:

910-639-9420 | 910-875-5045 APRIL 2017 |

OutreachNC.com 65

Generations

by Carrie Frye & Michelle Goetzl

OutreachNC asked adults and children our April question. Share your answer on our Facebook page.

Where do you like to volunteer and why?

Caring House, a home for those receiving cancer treatment at Duke. —Laura, 52 Pittman Grove Baptist Church, because I love serving Him here in my home church. —Melissa, 50 The Whispering Pines Thrift Shop! We not only give about $40,000 a year to local Moore County charities, but we give clothing to those in need but also blankets and towels to animal shelters. —Bonnie, 73 Jewish Family Services as a friendly visitor. I learn so much from my visits and their smiles show their appreciation. —Ellen, 51

N.C. Fall Festival, because you get to see lots of people. —Judy, 71 The nursery at church, because I can play with the babies. —Greta, 4 The animal shelter, because it’s fun to play with animals. —Anna, 12 Piedmont Farm Animal Refuge. Animals and people are equals, and I want everyone to know that. —Nik, 8 At church with the toddlers, because I like going outside with them. —Holly, 8

Family Promise of Moore County. Everyone deserves to feel accepted no matter what they are going through. —Devynn, 12 I like to help at church and help my family. —Eli, 6 The food bank. It’s fun to sort and organize the food. —Stella, 10 Working as a team with my friends to make someone else’s house cleaner. —Caroline, 7 With the Jaycees helping with the Easter egg hunt, but I do love volunteering at the animal shelter. —Ivy, 10

As a sheriff’s office chaplain to give back to those who give so much. —Kenneth, 60 My grandchildren’s school. I’m a retired educator and still have time and the ability to help. —Carol, 67

I want to raise money for people with cancer. It’s not fair that they get sick. —Thomas, 9

Caring Hearts for Canines. Really love taking care of these pups while they are to find new homes. OutreachNC.comwaiting | APRIL 2017 —Candace, 55

To be a therapy cat and lend a paw of affection whenever possible. —OutreachNC Co-editor Jeeves, 4

YOU ALREADY KNOW YOU’RE GONNA LOVE IT!

1 LONG The

PHOTO BY NAOMI KALTMAN

.5 POINT STROKE

ESTRUNNING

MUSICAL in

AMERICAN

Broadway History!

May 5 - 7 | Seats start at $35

+ taxes & fees

May 12 - 14 | Seats start at $35

+ taxes & fees

Hurry for Best Seats

GROUPS OF 12 OR MORE: Groups@DPACnc.com

APRIL 2017 |

OutreachNC.com 67

Launch into spring with a clean slate.

Equity Line of Credit (HELOC), your home’s value can be the

A handful of ways you can put your line of credit to work:

key to that bathroom remodel you’ve been meaning to do, a

Home Renovation

tool for debt consolidation or even a way to pay for college.

Travel

Spring is a time of new beginnings. With a First Bank Home

You’ll be able to access your money quickly and easily, and get all the help you need along the way from the loan experts at First Bank.

College Tuition Credit Card Debt

To learn more, visit

LOCALFIRSTBANK.COM/HELOC 68 OutreachNC.com | APRIL 2017

Loans subject to credit approval. NMLS 474504 Equal Housing Lender | Member FDIC