Charlie Kirk fatally shot during speech
Carina Cole, Julian Balsley Editor-in-Chief, News Editor
[CW: This article discusses gun violence and assassination.]
On Wednesday, Sept. 10, conservative activist and political commentator Charlie Kirk was fatally shot while speaking at an event at Utah Valley University. He was 31 years old.
In 2012, Kirk co-founded Turning Point USA, a right-wing nonprofit organization that advocates for conservative politics on high school and college campuses, with Bill Montgomery, a businessman and mentor to Kirk. Kirk also wrote numerous ideologically conservative books, with topics ranging from the supposed loss of academia’s credibility to his ardent support of President Donald Trump’s Make America Great Again movement. Notably, Kirk also hosted the daily conservative talk-radio program, “The Charlie Kirk Show,” which gained traction with young, conservative men in the United States. He was known for making inflammatory racist, xenophobic, anti-abortion, transphobic, Islamophobic, antisemitic and
See Kirk on page 4
Students reflect on military in D.C., L.A.
Brown, Hadley Amato News Editor, Assistant News Editor
This summer, the typically picturesque Lafayette Park, located in front of the White House, was closed to the public by a tall black fenceline—the place Washington, D.C. residents and tourists used to gather was empty. In the past three months, the nation’s capital was altered by the deployment of the National Guard, a military parade, increased police presence and overall unrest among the city’s population. On the other side of the country, Los Angeles experienced a similar military occupation as citizens gathered throughout the city to protest raids carried out by Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). In the midst of interning, traveling and spending time at home, Vassar students bore witness to the changing landscapes of two of America’s most influential cities.
On Aug. 11, President Donald Trump announced that the National Guard would be deployed to the District of Columbia to address crime in the city. Two days later, troops touched down in the nation’s capital. Since then, over 2,300 troops have been deployed. Patrolling the streets and stationed at metro stops, the presence of the National Guard was unavoidable for Vassar students and other residents of the District.
“The first time I was ever aware that the National Guard was coming was because
See Military on page 3

Free laundry takes effect RSLCP welcomes new Director
Luke Jenkins Senior Editor
New washers and dryers, free of charge for student use, were installed in all residential spaces this June. The machines’ arrival followed the passing of a Vassar Student Association (VSA) bill last spring, concluding a years-long push by the VSA to reduce costs for residents.
While payment is no longer required at the machines, $10 of each student’s annual tuition and fees—specifically a portion of the Student Actives Fee that funds VSA operations—is now set aside by the VSA to help finance the program.
The new system replaces the earlier VSA program Vassar Washing Allocation for Student Health (VWash). This program allowed those on Work Study, which VSA sources quoted as 1,135 students in 2024, to receive a laundry stipend. The stipend was set at $33 in 2022, calculated to reflect the cost of one washer and dryer cycle per week for the academic year. In 2024, the VSA renegotiated with the College to raise the stipend to $46.80, after the price of a load in a washer or dryer was raised from $1.60 to $1.80.
Mila Seifert ’26, who served as a Class Senator and was a co-sponsor of the Free Laundry Bill, was part of the negotiations with College administrators to raise
the VWash stipend. Rather than have to continue negotiating for increases in the future, Seifert expressed that both VSA members and the administration wanted a different solution: “And so we met with [administrators] regularly to continue negotiating. And they came back to us in one meeting with [Dean] Alamo, if I recall, and said, ‘We have a proposal for you.’”
Seifert described the proposal, which was a precursor to the Free Laundry Bill, as well-timed, because the College’s current contract with laundry service providers was coming to an end. The VSA struck an agreement with the College, then drafted and passed the bill. Reflecting on the machine’s installation, she recalled how much work the VSA put into the issue: “And to see something that we worked so hard on benefit the student body in such a substantial way was incredible.”
Under the Free Laundry Bill, there are no restrictions on the amount of free cycles students can access. Students expressed that because of the change, they felt more free to wash not only their clothes more often, but also their bedding and towels.
Maxx Martinez ’26 was not aware the program was taking effect, stating, “Then one of my friends told me that it was free, and in my excitement I did tons of laundry.” He no longer worries about having to
See Laundry on page 4
This year, Vassar welcomed Reverend Callista Isabelle as the new Associate Dean of the College for Religious and Spiritual Life and Contemplative Practices (RSLCP). Reverend Isabelle is stepping into a role that Reverend Sam Speers held for 26 years prior to his retirement. I recently had the opportunity to speak with Rev. Isabelle about her path to becoming the leader of the RSLCP office, how she views her role on campus and her hopes for the future of RSLCP.
Rev. Isabelle comes to Vassar with a long history of university ministry work. After graduating from Yale Divinity School, she worked as an AAssociate Cchaplain at Yale University, then moved on to be Chaplain at Muhlenberg College in 2011. Most recently, she served as the Director for Religious, Spiritual and Ethical Life at Washington University in St. Louis. As we sat together in Pratt House, she explained to me how she ended up deciding to move to New York and start this new stage of her career. “I have long admired Vassar and Reverend Speers’ leadership—I’ve known him for years—and these positions don’t open up very often. And so, when I learned of his retirement, I wanted to explore this a little bit. I was really excited about what I was learning about Vassar in the process. Students really get to shape the
life of the campus; it seems like a really vibrant place and RSLCP has a great long foundation here, so I’m really excited for the next chapter of my leadership to be here.”
When we spoke, Rev. Isabelle was only starting her fourth week on campus, but she is ready to dive into celebrating RSLCP’s past and shaping its future. “I really want to appreciate and honor the traditions that have sustained RSLCP: lessons and carols and the new tradition of coffee houses here at Pratt that students really love (the first of which is coming up on Thursday, Sept. 25 from 9 to 10 a.m.). I’m also really curious to be listening over the course of this year and beyond what students are really eager to talk about and how they want to dig into interfaith learning and dialogue, which is an area I’m really passionate about.” Much of our conversation was devoted to exploring the idea of interfaith dialogue. She expanded on her definition of the term: “When I say interfaith I really always think about as big of a tent as we could possibly create, whether students are religious or not or somewhere in between, everyone is invited into those spaces.”
Pratt House is not the only place that Rev. Isabelle hopes to extend her reach. She told me her hopes for reaching students all across campus, from academic departments to student organizations to off-campus communities and beyond: “I’m really eager to See director on page 7
8 FEATURES
5 ARTS Inside this issue
Lora Janczewski reports on a lecture outlining Rachel Carson’s legacy and environmentalism.

Aurelia Harrison interviews Vassar College student and rapper Rizal about his new album.

OPINIONS
Ian Watanabe analyzes Zohran Mamdani’s political trajectory.


THE MISCELLANY NEWS
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
MANAGING EDITOR
SENIOR EDITORS
CONTRIBUTING EDITOR NEWS EDITORS
ASSISTANT NEWS EDITOR ARTS EDITOR
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OPINIONS EDITOR
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LIVE EVENTS CHAIR
WEBMASTER REPORTERS/COLUMNISTS
CARTOONIST COPY STAFF
Carina Cole
Allison Lowe
Darja Coutts
Luke Jenkins
Soren Fischer
Clara Alger
Julian Balsley
Emma Brown
Hadley Amato
Madeleine Nicks
Grace Finke
Aurelia Harrison
Ben Kaplan
Yaksha Gummadapu
Sydney Jones
Jacob Cifuentes
Ian Watanabe
Emma daRosa
Josie Wenner
Wren Buehler
Henry France
Casey McMenamin
Molly Delahunty
Holland Kaplan
Lucas Seguinot
Amelia Gracie
Kathryn Carvel
Anabel Lee
Sadie Bakken-Durchslag
Paige Hahn
Annie McShane
Sadie Keesbury
Olivia Blank
Denver Brown
Hunter Farhat
Jordan Alch
Eduardo Culmer
Armaan Desai
Noah Duncan
Lora Janczewski
Brendan Kenendy
Evan Seker
Erin Thatcher
Andrew Chu
Nikola Parker Cooperman
Quinn Kou
Gabrielle Lyman
Ren Nicolau
Tess Novack
Military presence in major cities shocks students
there was a huge protest right at 5 p.m. when I had left my office and was walking to the Georgetown shuttle,” said Hannah Lee ’26, who was interning in the District this summer. “That’s when I knew that this was going to be happening. And then I was on a Friday morning run from Georgetown to DuPont [Circle] and I was looking down, changing songs on my phone, and then I looked up and I saw a bunch of people in their [uniforms].”
Beyond the National Guard occupation, students noted feelings of unease at the presence of additional military personnel and equipment ahead of the army parade celebrating the Army’s 250th birthday that took place June 14. “Walking to work and seeing blockades and military tanks for a taxpayer funded parade was surreal to say the least,” wrote Abigail McLaughlin ’26, who was interning in the District this summer. Although McLaughlin had left the District of Columbia prior to the arrival of the National Guard, she added, “I never felt unsafe in the city without the National Guard, and I can say with confidence I would’ve felt unsafe with their presence.”
Students also reported observing many National Guard troops in areas of the city with relatively lower crime rates, such as Georgetown and DuPont Circle, even though the officers were previously deployed to combat crime. “D.C. is super segregated,” said Lee. “Obviously, there’s not much of the crime that they’re talking about in the northwest [of the District], [so it] was weird to see all the resources deployed there. But it’s also upsetting to see that they are targeting other, not as well-off areas of D.C. even more, like the northeast and southeast parts.”
Lee and Claire Perry ’27, a District of Columbia resident, both observed large groups of troops near popular local restaurants and

nightlife establishments. “[I] noticed that on nights out going to the bars with my friends, there would be huge groups of [National Guard officers] talking to drunk girls and questioning people,” wrote Perry. Reflecting on the experience of seeing troops around the city, Perry added, “It felt really uncomfortable to be watched by people who were so heavily armed, some wearing face coverings.”
Included in his push to lower crime in the District, Trump announced his intention to move people experiencing homelessness outside of the city. In the weeks following

this announcement, students began to see dwindling numbers of unhoused people throughout the city. “There were a lot more homeless people that were [in Georgetown] earlier in the summer,” said Lee. “I noticed that after the National Guard came, there were also a lot of unmarked cars [in Georgetown]. I don’t know where they went, but I think the homeless population in Georgetown just completely dwindled down, which is insane.”
In Los Angeles, the response to the National Guard was characterized by widespread protest. Scores of Angelenos poured down the one-way streets of Downtown Los Angeles, as the city’s population came out for mass protests against ongoing ICE raids and Trump’s installation of the National Guard, a decision that was met with dissent from both residents and politicians on the local and state level. Two lifelong citizens of Los Angeles spoke with The Miscellany News on what the presence of the National Guard meant for their city, and how they understood the protests.
Niko Jerrard ’28 and Sophie Shulman ’28, who jointly attended protests in Downtown, spoke about the psychological impact of the National Guard on the protestors. Both emphasized the idea that the National Guard’s presence did more to frighten protestors than to actually enforce federal law. Shulman said, “The National Guard almost felt more like a symbolic presence than anything… It was like a more intimidating visual.” Jerrard agreed, sharing, “[The] National Guard can’t conduct arrests or shoot people, but they can scare people.” Under this fearful environment, protests did not last for more than a couple of weeks. Shulman asserted, “That’s so obviously the goal…just creating such an intense and hostile environment that people are either going to get scared or they’re going to get burned out.”
As a result, Shulman noticed that her neighborhood’s reaction to the presence of ICE and the National Guard was strong at first, but later diminished after weeks of ongoing protest and police response. She explained, “In my immediate neighborhood there was definitely a quick sense of, ‘We need to lock in and support one another’... I’m not sure how much that ‘lock in’ sense of community lasted after the most
public parts of everything that was going on.” Jerrard shared a similar sentiment: “I feel my own resolve wavering too, which makes me kind of sad.”
Despite the widespread media attention that the National Guard received, according to both Shulman and Jerrard, it was actually the Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD) that led most of the violent response. “The majority of the violence that we bore witness to was definitely LAPD.” Shulman went on to describe the police’s response to protestors as “the most disturbing things” she had seen police officers do. The impact of ICE raids and the National Guard on Los Angeles has been substantial. Estimates show that between June 1 and June 26, approximately 2,031 people were arrested by ICE across seven counties in Southern California—68 percent of whom had no prior criminal convictions. This number does not include the hundreds of protestors arrested from the first week of June’s protests. Los Angeles’s Latino and Hispanic communities, which make up 48 percent of the county’s population, have faced serious challenges. Many immigrants across Los Angeles face great risk of deportation by simply going to school or work.
As a result, local businesses, street vendors and public places are left without the people who once made them up. In wake of the ICE raids, the usual hum of Los Angeles’ vibrant streets are quieter. Jerrard reflected on the impact of this on the everyday experience of life in Los Angeles: “My favorite taco stand closed, and we don’t know what happened to the people that worked there… There’s certain neighborhood staples that are disappearing.” With ICE raids ongoing and the threat of the National Guard in the collective consciousness of residents, Los Angeles remains a city threatened by both federal immigration enforcement and a militarized police force.
On Sept. 2, a federal judge ruled that Trump’s military occupation of Los Angeles was illegal. Despite this, Trump announced on Sept. 12 that he would be deploying the National Guard to Memphis, Tennessee. This is a departure from his previous indications that Chicago, Illinois, would be the next city troops would be sent to. The White House has yet to announce when the National Guard will arrive in Memphis.
New machines installed: free laundry a reality
Continued from Laundry on page 1
overload the machines to avoid paying for two loads, or rationing what gets washed. Martinez added, “I would dread having to figure out how I was going to do it. It’s so nice to be able to just use two machines now and not have to worry about the cost of anything.”
When Ava Arcoleo ’27 arrived at Vassar, she was surprised to find laundry was not free and that friends at other schools did not have to pay to use washers and dryers. How has laundry day changed for her? Arcoleo said, “It’s more carefree.” She no longer faces the little inconvenience of realizing she does not have enough VCash available for a load—then having to transfer funds into her account. Arcoleo continued: “Aside from the tide pod that goes in, it’s an exciting experience.”
For Jack Rosenfeld ’29 and other firstyears, paying at the machine will never be a part of their residential experience at Vassar. Rosenfeld is grateful and thinks free laundry will encourage good hygiene: “If you have to worry about the cost of laundry, it’s going to be an inhibitor to actually start doing your laundry.”
All of the new machines are Speed Queen brand. Rosaleen Cardillo, Assistant Vice President for Auxiliary Services, shared in an email to The Miscellany News that the brand was recommended by Vassar’s laundry service partner TediMatts: “Their commercial-grade construction is built for high-volume and long-lasting use.”
The feedback administrators are receiving? “We have heard that students are happy that the machines are free and will be doing laundry more often,” Cardillo wrote.
She also noted why some of the units have different dimensions: “Some of the machines are slightly larger in size as they are designed to meet ADA compliance stan-
dards.” The washers and dryers are expected to last on campus until the end of the decade, approximately seven to nine years. Arcoleo dubbed the new system as the
best action the VSA has taken. Seifert added, “It was a good reminder that the VSA can do really productive work that benefits students.”

Vassar professors analyze Charlie Kirk assassination
homophobic comments throughout his career, primarily on “The Charlie Kirk Show.”
Richard Born, Vassar Professor of Political Science, commented on Kirk’s remarkable charisma and influence on younger generations: “As far as political influencers go, Kirk has been extremely good with organizing on campuses. I think it was 2,000 campuses in the United States where he has established Turning Point USA chapters.” According to its website, Turning Point has established over 800 chapters nationwade.
Late Thursday, Sept. 11, or early Friday, Sept. 12—different times were reported by Utah Governor Spencer Cox and Federal Bureau of Investigations (FBI) Director Kash Patel, respectively—U.S. Marshals detained and held 22-year-old suspected shooter Tyler Robinson, who was then taken into custody by the FBI. Robinson’s father recognized his son from photos released by authorities and confronted him about them, urging Robinson to turn himself in. When Robinson refused, his father enlisted the help of a local pastor, who tried to calm Robinson, and then called the U.S. Marshals, who detained him.
On Tuesday, Sept. 16, Robinson was charged with aggravated murder, felony firearm discharge, obstruction of justice, witnessing tampering and several other counts. Utah County Attorney General Jeff Gray said that he plans to seek the death penalty for Robinson.
As of publication, Robinson’s motive in the killing remains unknown, despite speculation about his anti-fascist beliefs due to an engraving on one of the rifle casings found at the scene that read, “Hey fascist! CATCH!”
“I don’t think we really know anything about the assassin,” remarked Associate Professor and Chair of Greek and Roman Studies Curtis Dozier. “No one really knows, and, I think, we maybe never will know.”
Multiple Vassar professors identified the shooting as one instance in a larger chain of recent escalating political violence. Dozier said of the attack, “It feels to me that it signals a despairing citizenry, a citizenry that feels so poorly served by their government that in a nation of close to 400 million people, a certain number of people are going to turn to violence to express that despair.” Professor of Political Science on the Margaret Stiles Halleck Chair Sidney Plotkin explained, “The Charlie Kirk assassination is part of a stream of violence in recent American politics, that is evident. It’s not the start of something new. It’s part of something that has been going on and represents an intensification of it.”
In regards to this stream of violence, Plotkin also cited the attack on former Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi’s husband Paul Pelosi; the stalking and murder of Minnesota Speaker of the House Emerita Melissa Hortman, Minnesota State Senator John Hoffman and both senators’ spouses; the planned kidnapping of Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer, as well as other lawmakers; the shooting of a group of Republican lawmakers, including then-Majority Whip Steve Scalise; the two attempted assassinations of Donald Trump; and the Jan. 6, 2021, insurrection.
Plotkin did note, however, that Kirk’s assassination deviates from the stream of violence in two major ways: “One, Kirk was not an elected official. Two, he was very, very young.”
Kirk was known for openly advocating for political violence against people with whom he disagreed. A recent article in the socialist magazine Jacobin describes how Kirk dehumanized and endorsed broad violence against liberals and the Left. In October 2023, he said of Democrats, “We’re dealing with maggots, vermin and swine here.” Dozier remarked, “His way of talking about the culture war—notice the violent metaphor— the culture war that he was engaged in and that he was going to wage against evil forces trying to destroy America. It’s a violent framing, and as I think the Jacobin article argues pretty effectively, he was, throughout his career, promoting political violence, not explicitly, but kind of making it a respectable and acceptable means of discourse.”
Born expressed a similar sentiment, but rather than commenting on Kirk’s direct dehumanization of the Left, he explained right-wing politicians’ immediate exploitation of the assassination for political gain. Specifically, Born noted that Trump has been pressuring Indiana Republican politicians to redistrict; this would be a middle of the decade gerrymander, which violates normal redistricting protocol. Born continued, “There is an extremely right-wing newly elected [Indiana] senator, Jim Banks, who is exploiting the murder of Kirk to the hills [to justify the proposed redistricting], using words like ‘evil’ and ‘the devil’ towards the Democratic party… And the justification is that the Democrats are essentially the evil party, and I haven’t seen anything like that so far.”
Plotkin emphasized how unprecedented Trump’s comments have been compared to previous national leaders. “The habit of
American presidents is to bring the country together, the way the governor of Utah tried in his immediate comments,” he said. “This President is pulling us apart, and he’s opening a chasm into which, I think, people who are prone to violence are more than happy to walk.”
In the wake of the shooting, Kirk’s comments at a Turning Point USA event on May 5, 2023, have resurfaced, at which he stated, “I think it’s worth it to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment to protect our other God-given rights. That is a prudent deal.” The event was held just days after a shooter killed three children and three adults at a school in Nashville.
“A lot of people are kind of relishing the irony that here’s Charlie Kirk, he promoted political violence throughout his career, and they want to say, ‘Live by the sword, die by the sword,’” noted Dozier. “And I will admit, I feel the attraction of that, but I think it’s bad for our nation if political violence is respectable. I think it’s bad for any society trying to live in peace.”
Plotkin described his initial reaction to the shooting: “I thought it was a horrible moment… I thought that the impact of this assassination of Charlie Kirk would do nothing but sorely aggravate an already grievously divided country, and would, in fact, likely endanger the lives of important, particularly young leaders on the Left. I am deeply concerned that the lives of people like Alexandria Ocasio Cortez or mayoral candidate [Zohran] Mamdani and others of that generation are in the crosshairs of some demented individual comparable to the young man who killed Charlie Kirk.”
September 18, 2025
Rapper Rizal talks new album
Aurelia Harrison assistant arts editor
Adnan Ahmed Rizal ’28 is a man of many talents. Originally from New Haven, Connecticut, he is an independent musician rapping under his stage name, Rizal. Rizal has come onto the Vassar scene strong, commanding the stage at his solo Mug Night and opening ViCE’s spring concert with student band Magnolia. This summer, Rizal released his fourth album: “That’s Alright.” Available on music streaming platforms, “That’s Alright” is rich with humor, vulnerability and charisma. It is an album that takes you everywhere and leaves you with a lot to think about afterward. This week, I had the opportunity to talk with Rizal about his new album, his inspirations and what he hopes people will get out of his music.
“Your rap tends towards a more dense and lyrical style. What’s your writing process like?”
“There will always be inspiration that comes to me, from both the things that are going around in my life and in the world. The artist in me always wants to come up with ideas. Once I have those ideas, I’ll just keep writing about it and writing about it. That’s in terms of rapping—when it comes to bigger projects and bigger ideas, like my last album, I always want to be bigger, do better, to grow as an artist. I had my concept and plan, but it wasn’t complex enough. I was watching films and getting inspired by what I was seeing. I was asking myself: ‘How can I make the narrative something complex, so that the audience has to really think about it?’”
“You cite pop culture as a big influence in your work. Musically, who are your biggest influences? Where do you feel influenced by them the most?”
“It’s always been Kendrick. Kendrick was the first artist I ever listened to and was a fan of. I was saying how I wanted to make the album more complex—I was looking at Kendrick’s albums. Kendrick will put something
out there, and then play devil’s advocate against himself. He just makes you think so deeply about everything, in all his albums: ‘Mr. Morale,’ ‘To Pimp a Butterfly,’ ‘DAMN.’ Rapping-wise, a big inspiration for me is JID. His new album, ‘God Does Like Ugly,’ is insane. I pull a lot of creativity from Smino, too. Those three are my GOATS.”
“Let’s talk production. Do you make your own beats? How do you approach music production? Who is involved in that process?”
“I take a lot of notes on the vibe I want. I made a tracklist and wrote down what I wanted for each track. It’s never bad to pull inspiration from other tracks, looking at the energy in other songs and trying to translate that energy into your own feelings and putting that into your own track. Production-wise, I’m pretty good with chord progressions and pretty good at figuring out where to put stuff. It’s more feeling than technical for me. A lot of it is self-taught, for me. This is the first album I put live instruments on, also. I play some of my own basslines, I play piano and I included some people I know too.”
“Right, I understand that a few of your Vassar collaborators contributed to the album. Who were they? How did they get involved and what was the process like working with them?”
“The first person I wanted to play on the album was actually my friend from New Haven, Demari Cole. For the intro track, I knew I wanted something really groovy and something really punchy and funky. I figured I would ask him if he would do it, and it turned into something beautiful. I felt like the intro track was good, but it was missing something to wrap it all up, because I wanted it to be a summary of the album. I was thinking about Alden’s (Alden Ormont ’27) guitar solos for Magnolia, who I’ve worked with before, and I asked him to hop on. On the last track, I also have Sebastian (Sebastian DeLeon ’28) on drums and Noah (Noah Pockriss ’28) on keys. Chemistry was really important to me. I wanted
people who were gonna understand my vision and be excited to do it.”
“A lot of your work, both on this album and in the past, references your upbringing in New Haven and your Malaysian heritage. What role does that play in your music?”
“Like everybody, you love where you’re from. I love talking about identity in my music. Sometimes I feel like I’m in so many places that it’s hard to reside in one. I love talking about that because I know people will relate to that. New Haven has always been home to me.
As for Malaysia, I love Malaysian music so much. I sample Malaysian music all the time. My mom would put on Malaysian music for holidays. The third track, ‘Malaysia,’ is an ode to my home—I speak Malay on it.I went to Malaysia in the summer of 2022. I spent three weeks with my dad’s family and three weeks with my mom’s. That song has three parts: the first part to represent my experience with my dad’s side, the third
part to represent my mom’s and the middle to represent how I was feeling. I personally consider myself American. I don’t reside with my Malaysian side a lot. But it’s still there: my mom is an immigrant, my dad is an immigrant, and they preserved our culture inside our house. It’s an ode, an appreciation of the fact that I’m in America doing my thing, but that doesn’t exclude me from my Malaysian ethnic background.”
“Do you have a favorite moment from the album you want to highlight?”
“‘422A’ was the most fun to make. It was this nostalgic vibe, the rhymes were there, the storytelling was there. I made the bassline for that song. ‘Is it Alright’ also, it’s easily my most conceptual song. It reflects what goes on in my head when I overthink. It reflects the concept of the album: is it alright to grow within yourself and still stay connected? And ‘Malaysia.’ It’s so beautiful to me, having that ode to Malaysia and being able to talk about it. It’s such a beautiful track.”

The summer song void: scouting this year’s contenders
As fall foliage seeps into view, pumpkin spice dominates the menu and cable sweaters make their way back into our wardrobes, one is left wondering, with great thought and deliberation, where was the song of the summer?
The song of the summer is more so a form of cultural ubiquity than an official title. Ask anyone about the summer of 2012, and “Call Me Maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen will enter their nostalgic subconscious. Or the summer of 2016: “This Is What You Came For” by Rihanna and Calvin Harris dominated the airwaves, along with Drake’s “One Dance.”
Last summer, “Not Like Us” by Kendrick Lamar became a dance floor staple, and “Espresso” bolstered Sabrina Carpenter’s status as a main pop girl. Chappell Roan spawned in and “BRAT” by Charli XCX… Nothing needs to be said about an album that quite literally was conflated with summer itself. But, ask anyone about the summer of 2025, and well… Perhaps there ceased to be a “song of the summer” at all.I could have had a swag summer with the help of Bieber; you could have had a summer riddled with
manchildren and Sabrina’s Dunkin’ drink. Perhaps you were feeling Christian-coded with Alex Warren’s “Ordinary,” or maybe your friend really wanted you to listen to that one Morgan Wallen album that is allegedly everywhere, but you never seem to come across it. Well me personally, I object to the aforementioned as songs of the summer. They were definitely omnipresent, but not in my world. Here are four picks that I empirically chose through great experimentation and hypothesizing—they were scientifically proven to be songs of the summer.
“Illegal,” PinkPantheress: I remember stumbling upon a snippet of this song early in the summer and something in my bones told me: This is a hit. As she compares an intense high to an equally intense situationship, PinkPantheress expertly uses synths and her playful vocals to bring a chaotic bliss to the forefront of the track. Her catchy lyrics are perfect for many TikTok trends, and yet the song has held its own outside of the app. What says “summer” more than having a fling and getting high?
“Whim Whamiee,” PLUTO ft. YKNIECE
If I had a dollar for every time I queued up this song in a car… It is absolutely perfect to blast while the windows are rolled all
the way down. The cultural significance of this song cannot be understated—“WHIM WHAM,” “LULULEMONNN,” “IM TALMBOUT INNIT”—although already on a downward trajectory in the pop culture sphere, these phrases held a grasp on a lot of us at some point during the summer. This summer song was a tribute, of sorts, to overly arrogant and successful women; at least that’s what overcomes me when listening.
“Headphones On,” Addison Rae Summer seems as if it has adopted whimsical and sublime status—an expectation that it cannot always keep up with. The lulls of summer truly pain me in the midst of painful heat and musty humidity, but an obvious cure comes to the forefront of my mind: putting my headphones on. Addison Rae’s discography has cemented itself as a pop bible, and with “Headphones On,” it’s almost as if she balances on a log to cross a shallow stream, juggling a quaint sound with a meditative experience.
“Henry Come On,” Lana Del Rey It is not summer without Lana Del Rey. Every summer, a Lana song must dominate my larger summer soundtrack, and this year it was “Henry, Come On.” Country and ballads seemingly subjugated every station this summer—like, truly, stop playing Alex
Warren, I beg. However, this understated country-esque, yet orchestral piece brings us to the forefront of a decaying American frontier, where such an aesthetic can no longer exist in a vacuum and instead is a reminder of the brittle nature of our current condition. Of course, we cannot forget the Ethel Cain diss track that succeeded this song—the Americana girls are fighting. As I sat on the beach, smelling like sunscreen and sweat, I realized: Maybe there is no song of the summer, because there is no summer anymore, at least not in the conventional sense. This used to be the season of consensus, poolside choruses and dance floors united. Now, perhaps the only thing that is collective is our unsharedness. My “Whim Whamiee” is not your “Ordinary.” Your Morgan Wallen is not my Addison Rae. The internet promised democratization. What we got instead was a trade-off, monoculture for microcultures: subreddits, stan Twitter (or X…), Spotify Discover Weekly. All these rituals make summer feel uniquely ours, but never ours together. The lack of collective rhythms, a shared, communal pulse that once allowed us to march, mourn, protest together—has now broken up. While ubiquity may be dead, its funeral had a fantastic soundtrack.
Musician nelward expands on his melodic whimsy
WhenI forage for music—keeping my ears open for my next months-long obsession—I seem to discover my favorite songs in the oddest of places. It is as though I need to stumble upon something out in the wild for it to really stick. In nelward’s case, I came across him in a YouTube video, which just so happened to use his most popular song, “GHOST,” for its intro and outro.
The outro was a catchy alt-rock riff, but the intro embodied a different vibe entirely. Sonically, it read to me like the sound effects and jingle that would play upon opening the homescreen of a little-known 2000s video game and clicking the “play” button. I was surprised to learn that these were simply two different parts of the same song; I had assumed they were separate tracks entirely. Intrigued, I listened to the song in full.
It was weird and wonderful. “GHOST” was not just a peppy tune about the pain of getting ghosted; it was a constant musical experiment. The artist added anything that came to mind: wordless vocalizations, glitching transitions between each section of the song and even a “boing” sound effect. And his performance in the music video was even weirder and more wonderful, alternating between being greenscreened into settings like the default Windows XP desktop background and dancing in the middle of a fast food restaurant while holding a plastic toy guitar.
Naturally, I had to investigate further, and thus, I became a devoted fan of nelward, an Atlanta-based musician whose
genre is self-described as a funky blend of electronic and art pop that strongly embraces Internet culture. It is a decent attempt, to be sure, but this does not begin to describe nelward as an artist. Not even his list of stylistic influences, which includes classic Nintendo games, jazz fusion, bubblegum pop and new jack swing, seems to clear it up. But after immersing myself in his most recent album, “nelward five,” which was released on Friday, Sept. 5, I am going to try my hand at describing that special nelward flair and what I love about it.
Most of the nine tracks on “nelward five” feature his signature “bouncy” sound, which is created by a combination of scratchy, energetic guitar riffs and a bass that seems to pop with every pluck of the strings. The songs are seasoned with a heavy-handed dose of synth, which ranges from rich, wavy chords to pinpricks of tiny bright notes that prickle in your ears. I feel that his music, overall, takes on a very physical nature. Each instrument has such a distinct texture that his songs become almost a multisensory experience.
He also likes to toss in unexpected instruments and tends to completely transform a song once it reaches its last 30 seconds, often dramatically switching tempos, instruments or even genres entirely. A great example of these techniques is “monkey moves,” the seventh track of “nelward five.” The buildup to the instrumental break is unexpectedly finished off with a resounding hit from a timpani, and in its last moments, the classic funk tune suddenly transforms into a trap beat.
This playful refusal to conform to expectations is a significant aspect of nelward’s craft, and a large part of why I find his mu-
sic so charming.
The fourth song of the album, “do i impress you?,” turned a genre-flipping trend on its head and struck fear into the hearts of nelward fans everywhere for about the first seven seconds of the song—not because of disturbing lyrics or unsettling visuals but because it sounded like it came straight from a Ford commercial until, mercifully, it glitched back into a signature nelward song, as though nothing ever happened. He reversed his formula, reminding us
The songs are seasoned with a heavy-handed dose of synth, which ranges from rich, wavy chords to pinpricks of tiny bright notes that prickle in your ears. I feel that his music, overall, takes on a very physical nature. Each instrument has such a distinct texture that his songs become almost a multisensory experience.
that as the artist, he can do whatever he wants at any given time. The lyrics depict admiration from afar and the melancholy of failing to grab the attention of one who has so thoroughly grabbed yours. There is longing but also a respectful distance. It is
unclear what relevance the Ford fake-out has to this story of yearning. Perhaps that was one of his attempts to be impressive. Reflecting on the meaning of nelward’s lyrics is a unique challenge in “Oh Tommy!,” the second track of the album. It is hard to tell what it is about at first. The lyrics are confusing, and the music video is absolute visual chaos, stuffed with layers upon layers of images and special effects, as though trying to give a seconds-long crash course on the entire history of the Internet. But as confusing as the video is, I believe “Oh Tommy!” is about trying to have a normal life amidst the depths of the digital age. As the video flashes pop-up ads, TikTok livestreams and even AI-generated nonsense, nelward sings about Tommy, a character who seems enviably carefree about the world.
The pre-chorus rapidly fires off phrases like “And eat that ghost over and over until you’re full grown scrollin’ ya phone and gettin’ mad at a bait post.” But this is a whirlwind of concerns that Tommy seems to be above. His name is not invoked in these sections of the lyrics; he is separate from the anxieties of his peers. The world is trying to weigh Tommy down as he grows up, but he manages to shake off that burden and find peace of mind.
nelward has the amazing ability to write deeply personal and reflective songs, some lyrics of which have forced me to stop in the middle of dancing to think about them. He achieves a balance between thought-provoking lyrics and earworms that are impossible not to bop your head to. “nelward five” is no exception to this trend. His creative whimsy continues, constantly sparking surprise and reflection.
Film department screens ‘Secret Mall Apartment’
If, like me, you spent your teenage years in American suburbia, then you probably ended up at your local moderately-run-down shopping mall most weekends. It is not that you were addicted to shopping as a 14-year-old—there was simply nowhere else to go within a 30-mile radius, besides the other shopping mall. Consumerism was thrust upon us at a young age by the very landscapes of America. Presumably, after making the rounds at the mall, you part ways with your friends and return home…right? The mall has always been a temporary destination, not a permanent one. Apart from the technical difficulties and legal barriers, living at the mall seems highly undesirable. The American Dream of consumerism seems to depend on the fundamental separation between the place you shop and the place you live.
Well, artist Michael Townsend, his wife Adriana Valdez Young and his friends Andrew and Jay thought otherwise. In fact, the quartet—later joined by an additional four more artists—lived in Providence Place Mall for four years from 2003 to 2007. It is a 1.4 million-square-foot institution located in downtown Providence. What was once an infamous small-town legend was recaptured as a hilarious and moving story of art and resistance in the 2024 documentary “Secret Mall Apartment” by director Jeremy Workman P ’27. On Sep. 10, I had the pleasure of attending the Film Department’s screening of “Secret Mall Apartment” followed by a Q&A with Workman.
In September 2003, the artists began a silly challenge of who could stay at the Providence Place Mall for the longest time without getting caught. They shared a Pentax Optio digital camera and documented their adventures: fitting room-hopping during the day and crouching behind a giant fourby-four column in a full-length puffer in the parking lot at night. That is, until Michael Townsend perused the Providence Place floor plan and recalled the scenes he saw on TV years ago of the construction of the mall. He discovers what appears to be a “nowhere place” hidden in the mall’s infrastructure. After climbing up giant ladders and squeezing through the cracks between walls, they found it: an abandoned, dusty 750-square-foot hole-in-the-mall.
Michael Townsend, after discovering a route to this nowhere space, felt the following: “We had a responsibility to do something with it.” Thus began their transformation of the secret mall space. Through their Pentax Optio, we watched the crew as they journeyed to the Salvation Army and attempted to discreetly sneak their thrifted furniture through the mall’s emergency exit. They set off the mall fire alarm each time. At this point, the nowhere place was feeling like more than just a momentary hiding spot. With a couch, TV, PlayStation, faux wooden cabinet that offered a façade of luxury and an entire 750-squareof free real estate, it was becoming a home. This characteristically juvenile endeavor, however, occurred under the backdrop of Providence’s urban renewal project at the turn of the century. The mall itself, designed to be entered via the I-95 highway directly into the parking lot, was not
made to be easily accessible to the people of Providence. The geographic location of the mall, therefore, drew a physical and symbolic demarcation between the wealthy and the working class.
Prior to the establishment of the Secret Mall Apartment, many members of the project lived out of an artist collective named Fort Thunder, home to a vibrant underground art and music scene. Yet, in 2001, contractors showed up and expressed that they were planning on knocking the building down; by 2002, Fort Thunder was demolished and its residents were displaced. To Young, it was clear that this represented the beginning of an enduring process of gentrification.
At the time, the mall experiment was a side project for Townsend. Townsend is a professor at the Rhode Island School of Design who grappled with the idea of creating poignant pieces through temporary media that are almost guaranteed to be destroyed. For him, the mall project was not only an extension of his artistic fascination with impermanence; it represented the dissolution of the boundaries between installation art and performance art, between art and life. It was both an elaborate prank and a very real rebellion against the corporations that view individuals as revenue-generating machines instead of real people.
At its peak, the Secret Mall Apartment was complete with cinder block walls that its residents, now eight artists, painstakingly transported and built with their own bare hands, and a door with a distinct key. It was cozy, homey, spacious and, most importantly, free. After four long years of bliss, in 2007, the apartment was discov-
ered by security through an accidental slipup on Townsend’s behalf and was immediately demolished. Townsend was briefly detained before being released, and, as punishment, he was permanently banned from entering Providence Place. Fast-forward to 2024, and the former residents of Providence Place still carried their secret mall keys. Perhaps this is a testament to the enduring legacy of impermanent endeavors.
After the screening, Workman shared his inspirations and some behind-thescenes moments from the documentary’s production. There had been numerous attempts to contact the Secret Apartment residents after the incident and document their story, but none were successful. In 2020, Workman befriended Townsend through a serendipitous encounter in Athens, Greece. As the two were having dinner, Townsend revealed he was the mall apartment guy. Workman had never heard of this urban legend before, but he was captivated by the story and wanted to capture it on screen. After a year of Workman’s convincing, Townsend finally agreed. Workman concluded by sharing that in a cruel twist of fate, “Secret Mall Apartment,” which premiered in Providence Place, had performed so well that it became the second-best-selling film in the mall’s history after “Sinners.” The mall, which experienced significant financial declines in recent years, had no choice but to lift the ban on Michael from entering the mall, so that he could come into the mall’s theater and help promote the film.
“Secret Mall Apartment” will be available to stream beginning Sept. 16, 2025.
RSLCP welcomes new Director: Reverend Callista Isabelle
think about building collaborations across campus; what are different departments we can partner with, academic or not; what student orgs could religious and spiritual life be connecting with, also our affiliate advisors serving our off campus communities as well as on campus in different religious communities and how we can collaborate more closely; I’m just eager to build as many bridges as we can because I think that’s in the best interest of students.”
As our conversation continued, we spoke more about interfaith dialogue and how it can be achieved when political environments can make any dialogue feel impossible to navigate. For Rev. Isabelle, interfaith dialogue is more about listening than speaking. She appreciates how this practice can allow us to understand ourselves better by choosing to truly listen to what someone else believes. She provided many pieces of advice that students could take to enter into effective interfaith dialogue, but one stuck out to me in particular: “What can make something truly interfaith is the intentional coming together with a spirit of curiosity and learning, recognizing that we’re going to come from different perspectives and have different beliefs and values, but coming to a space that we’re labeling interfaith or interreligious, I would hope that we can come with an understanding that we’re here to understand each other a little bit better.”
How does Rev. Isabelle see her role on campus? “I really see myself as here for all students of any or no religious background, as well as for any community member here at Vassar. I would like to be a resource if peo-
ple have questions, if they’re looking to connect with the community, if they need help with religious accommodations. I also want to be a bridge builder, and to help students figure out how they can be bridge builders across religious and spiritual difference.”
Rev. Isabelle is also available to any students looking for a listening ear, whether they may be grappling with spiritual questions or just want to chat about a recent exam. Beyond helping individual students, Rev. Isabelle also characterized her position on campus as paying attention to the spiritual health and needs of our community more broadly. “For me this role is about keeping my finger on the pulse of the community and seeing, are there ways that on the spiritual support side we can better support students, are there things going on in the world or going on on campus that we can attend to.”
Rev. Isabelle comes to us with nearly two decades of experience as an on-campus spiritual leader. She is combining this experience with the delicate task of stepping in for Rev. Speers—someone who had long been a pillar of the Vassar community. Rev. Isabelle has had a relationship with Rev. Speers for many years, and she had only good things to say about stepping in to continue his legacy and forge one of her own. She described an admiration for the humbleness that Rev. Speers approached his work with, as well as an appreciation for his role in establishing Pratt House as a hub for RSLCP. Additionally, she told me that, while this shift in leadership is a moment of excitement for the community, it is also a moment of loss. “I recognize that, for Vassar, it’s a huge shift to not have him here. Anytime somebody leaves who’s be-
loved it’s a loss, but also we’re excited for him because he’s in retirement and it’s an exciting new chapter for him.” Rev. Isabelle is interested both in continuing Speers’ legacy and building upon it.
Continuing this legacy allows her an opportunity to reflect on what the role of RSLCP is on a secular campus. For her, RSLCP is not a place to focus on any one religion, or on being religious at all, but a place that can be home to dialogue that allows students to reflect on their purpose as well as our collective purpose as a community. “Even in the mission statement of Vassar is the phrase ‘purposeful life’ and I think that is kind of at the heart of what RSLCP is on our campus.”
Rev. Isabelle continued, describing how religious dialogue can truly represent the goal of liberal arts education, “I think it’s both the particulars around religious and spiritual life but also the broad kind of search for meaning and purpose, which is at the core of liberal arts education.” She believes it is about asking brave questions and encouragement to ask even more.
Rev. Isabelle is a Lutheran pastor, but has made a conscious choice to serve on religiously diverse campus communities for her entire career rather than seeking out a Lutheran congregation of her own. She described advising students of all or no faith as a way that she has grown in her own faith. For Rev. Isabelle, working in a multifaith environment has allowed her to be inspired by students from any or no religious background and has offered a lifelong opportunity to reflect on her own beliefs and what she appreciates about her faith. We could have spoken for our entire time together about
different moments that she has found joy in during her time working on college campuses, but she was able to boil down what she loves about working with us: “I love the questions and the energy that students bring to a campus community, no two days are the same, I’m never bored, and I’m deeply honored and humbled when students invite me into their life story, whether it’s a quick hello or one of those deep soul searching conversations, it’s such a privilege.”
College can feel overwhelming sometimes. It can seem like between classes, work, organizations and everything else, there is barely time to explore your beliefs, values and how you can serve the people around you. Rev. Isabelle has hit the ground running to create a space that allows everyone at Vassar to stop and consider their inner world. Not every student will interact with RSLCP during their time at Vassar, but all of us will be lucky to have Rev. Isabelle in our corner.

Witnessing Ethel Cain: a religious experience
ka,” my favorite song off of “Preacher’s Daughter.” And she was going on tour.
Idiscovered Ethel Cain during my junior year of high school. Cain is a character created by Hayden Silas Anhedönia, who also uses the moniker as her stage name. Her 2022 debut album, “Preacher’s Daughter,” remains without a doubt my favorite album of all time. I was immediately hooked by Cain’s intense vocals and the rich soundscapes she creates in every song. The Southern Gothic concept album depicts the tragic story of Ethel Cain, covering themes such as American idealism, religious trauma and the search for true love—and there is cannibalism. It is beautiful and heartbreaking, and I cannot recommend it enough if you have not already listened to it.
Then, last year, I found out that Anhedönia was releasing a new album. It was going to be a prequel, focused on Ethel’s cataclysmic relationship with Willoughby Tucker, the subject of “A House In Nebras-
Getting my hands on tickets became a matter of necessity.
Fast forward to September: “Willoughby Tucker, I’ll Always Love You” is out and changing lives everywhere. “Dust Bowl” and “Waco, Texas”—songs I had listened to as demos on YouTube and SoundCloud for years—got their official release and are even more incredible than I had imagined they could be. I could not believe that I would soon see them live.
Then, the day came. Sept. 9th. My friend and I arrived in the city early—thanks to a last-minute sprint for the train—and managed to make it to Radio City Music Hall by 7:30 p.m. Unfortunately, the merch lines had already sprawled across the lobby, and by the time we found the end of a line—by crossing the lobby, going down a flight of stairs and crossing the lobby again—the only items left were $30 hats and sewing kits. This was not ideal, so we made the decision to jump ship and abandoned the line

to find our seats.
The band 9Million opened for Cain, led by her long-time friend and collaborator Matthew Tomasi. I enjoyed their rockheavy set, even if it was slightly overshadowed by anticipation of the main act. After their roughly half-hour set, we only had to wait a few more agonizing minutes before the first notes of “Willoughby’s Theme” rang out across the theater. The stage was coated in a fog that the lights painted a bright, toxic green. From this fog, Cain emerged.
Needless to say, it was an incredible night.
Cain delivered some amazing live vocals, and I am afraid I will never be able to listen to her music again without remembering just how good she sounded live. She was backlit for a lot of the show, and that, combined with the stage’s haziness, gave the entire performance an ethereal, dreamlike quality. It elevated her from the artist to the character of Ethel Cain.
Now, we need to talk about “Onanist.”
Cain’s rapturous performance of the song stole the show for me, and I am still thinking about it days later. This is a song that needs to be played at maximum volume to be experienced as your eardrums are on the verge of bursting. Live, and coupled with a nightmarish vortex of flashing lights as the song reached its climax, I literally felt like I was ascending to some higher plane.
Another highlight was hearing “Waco, Texas” live. The music that Cain makes is filled with so much catharsis, and nowhere is that more visible than in this 15-minute journey of a song. The outro is the perfect mix of nostalgia, regret and hope for the future despite all the odds. It feels like looking back on how far you have come and bcing

okay with it.
During the encore, I was thrilled that we got to hear “A House In Nebraska.” Do not get me wrong: Though I love “Thoroughfare,” this whole tour is about Willoughby, and it would be criminal to omit the song that started it all. The night ended with “American Teenager,” and you could feel the joy filling the theater. We applauded one final time and then promptly made a run for it before the mass exodus began . Later, sitting on the dirty floor of Grand Central Station eating Shake Shack, my friend and I had no words to describe what we had experienced. Even as we sleepily returned to campus at 2 a.m., the exhilaration of the show was still coursing through our veins.
Lecture honors Rachel Carson’s legacy
On Tuesday, Sept. 9, Vassar welcomed the President of the Rachel Carson Council (RCC) and esteemed environmentalist Dr. Robert K. Musil to discussCarson’s legacy and the work of the RCC.
Dr. Musil began his presentation with a gorgeous photo of Library Lawn. In it, the top of the library, its surrounding landscape and the buildings and dorms we are so familiar with are all visible. In the distance, the horizon is lined with hundreds of trees changing their colors in the autumn weather. It is no surprise our college is brimming with so much nature; we are an arboretum, after all. As is common among those surrounded by natural beauty, many people find themselves drawn to sharing their perspectives through storytelling and imagery—just like Rachel Carson, the writer of “Silent Spring.”
Born in rural Springdale, Pennsylvania, Carson grew up with a deep love for nature. Her mother encouraged both her fascination with the world around her and her talent for writing, which helped her become a published writer by the age of 10. It might seem natural to imagine Carson as a sort of enigma: a lone writer who suddenly came up with a masterpiece that changed the way the world looks at maintaining the environment. Who, after her book’s publication, returned to the background—her work being the entirety of her message and legacy, but the reality is far from that. She was constantly collaborating with those around her and passionately involved in politics and activism. She was a pioneer in modern environmental and social advocacy and worked tirelessly to fight for what she believed in.
After studying biology and English in college, Carson went on to Johns Hopkins University for a PhD. Despite following an
academically challenging path, she was also expected to take care of her family and work part-time jobs as a biology teacher. Because of these struggles, she was forced to leave before finishing her degree. Although it was hard for a woman in the early 1900s to secure a job in the sciences, Carson was hired at the U.S. Bureau of Fisheries with the help of her college mentor, Skinker. For one of her tasks, Carson wrote an essay for the U.S. Bureau of Fisheries. Upon reading it, her boss, Elmer Higgins, urged her to submit the essay to a literary magazine. He believed it was too good to be in a government pamphlet. Eventually, this essay, called “Undersea,” was published in the Atlantic Monthly and kick-started her fame as an environmental writer.
In “Undersea,” the two main characters are a mackerel and an eel. Carson anthropomorphizes these characters in order to encourage a deep sense of empathy among her readers, and, if you can develop empathy for an eel or a fish, Carson reasoned that you can develop empathy for any being other than yourself. In bringing to life the story of two sea creatures, she sheds light on other overlooked groups. She urged empathy for farmers and agricultural workers and for immigrants and indigenous communities; she was one of the first writers to tie environmental issues to social justice.
In 1962, Carson published “Silent Spring.” The book’s findings and greatness, however, cannot be attributed to Carson alone. Carson worked with a dear friend, Shirley Briggs, to discover that the effects of dichlorodiphenyltrichloroethane (DDT) were cumulative and that eggshells were thinning because birds were eating the fish impacted by exposure to this insecticide. Another friend and Vassar graduate, Marie Rodell ’32, worked enthusiastically to publicize the book and bring it to the attention of the American media.
More than a book sharing the negative

consequences of DDT, the work became an inspiration for not sitting back and watching corporations or institutions destroy the places we call home. In a commencement speech at Scripps College, Carson stated, “Your generation must face realities instead of taking refuge in ignorance and evasion of truth. Yours is a grave and a sobering responsibility, but it is also a shining opportunity.” She reminds us that we cannot sit idly by; we have to take action when action is necessary.
After Carson’s death, her close friends founded the RCC to carry on her legacy. Today, it serves as a hub for environmental news, activism and climate justice, as well as a social network for environmentalists from all walks of life to connect and find solutions to global issues. President Musil looked at all of us in the room and felt that the people sitting there, listening to him
share Carson’s message, were people who would go on to make a difference in the world, using the skills they learned at Vassar. He insisted that students are never too young to start being environmentally conscious and begin collaborating with others to reach climate goals. He stated, “Right now, you can take what you are doing and connect with thousands of other students like yourself to make a difference.”
To conclude his talk, Dr. Musil drew us back to the photo of Vassar he had shown us in the beginning. Remember all the trees? Imagine if they were cleared, acre by acre, to satisfy the economic goals of an industrial wood pellet company. Feel the anger, the sadness and the grief. Take it and raise hell. Learn more, discover more, write more, share more and fight more. We are the future of our environment. Action starts now.

From the desk of Wren Buehler, Assistant Humor Editor
Masochists unionize, demanding worse treatment Breaking News
Adventurer ventures deep into the library
Josie Wenner Undercover Agent
Vassar’s library is an institution on campus, an iconic sight along the world-famous and instantly recognizable Poughkeepsie skyline. And although a library is a place to answer questions, something about this library raises more questions than answers. First and foremost: Why so many books? Where do they all come from? Second and secondmost: Is there really a giant monster deep within the library basement that eats people who don’t move to the 24hour section after midnight? These questions must be answered, and I decided that I was the investigative journalist to answer them. To demystify the library’s many mysteries, I spent months deep undercover as a librarian.
The first step in my library infiltration involved coming up with a clever disguise and code name. I bought a bright purple wig from Party City and thrifted some sunglasses and a fake mustache. I also perfected my British accent lest my voice be recognized. Lastly, I came up with a bookish code name so nobody would doubt my presence in the library. Thus, my alter ego, Josie B. Reading, was born.
On the first day of my sting operation, I sneakily tiptoed into the library so as not to raise any suspicion. Once inside, I casually sauntered up to the front desk and inquired about open librarian positions. They told me there weren’t any. This raised my suspicions. I demanded that they give me a job, and shook my fist at them in a threatening manner. I was promptly escorted from the premises. I then sat down to write a notes app apology, accompanied by an apology video in which I cried, sang an apology song and begged for a job. Fortunately, my
endeavor was successful, and I was hired as a basement librarian with the caveat that I never, ever, ever sing at work.
My plan of action was going swimmingly thus far. My first assignment as basement librarian was to reshelve a bunch of books. Boring. I haphazardly threw the books on a random shelf, and as I was finished with my work, decided to go exploring. I chose to investigate the biggest question I had about the library: Where do all the books come from? I wandered down hallways and corridors, taking careful care to avoid the upstairs because basement librarians aren’t allowed on the main floor. I observed students reading, students writing and students napping, but above all, I observed books. So many books. Suddenly, I heard loud thuds and creaking noises coming from the wall to my right. I slyly crept down an aisle and found a bookshelf slightly ajar. I used my brute strength to push the bookshelf aside, revealing that it was in fact a hidden door! I gasped and decided to venture deeper into the depths. At the end of the secret passageway, I came across a wizened old man hunched over a desk. It was Frederick Thompson Memorial!
The library’s namesake put down his quill pen with shock. I explained who I was and the purpose of my investigation. He then told me about how he copies each and every book by hand, drinking 17 Redbulls a day to keep up with the demand. Memorial lives in the little tower on top of the Deece, so he has a quick commute to work, and there’s nothing he loves more than his job.
I bade Mr. Memorial well and continued on my trek through the basement. As I was walking through the periodicals, I came across a strange doorway lined with mysterious symbols. I chose to ignore the plot of every horror movie ever and walked

through the doorway, where I came across a fearsome beast. The rumors were true! There is a monster that eats people who don’t move to the 24-hour section after midnight, and boy was she scary. She had big teeth as long as my arm, evil eyes as big as my head and a scaly body several times larger than me. She fiercely roared at me, and I grabbed a conveniently-placed sword off the ground and waved it at her. I ducked, dodged and weaved her attacks, and after a long, grueling battle I stabbed my sword into her head.
Upon freeing the library from the tyranny of the people-eating monster, I bravely strolled back to the circulation desk. My boss screamed when she saw my bloodsoaked appearance, and groaned when I said I had slayed the beast. Apparently she was an endangered species. Whoops. I was swiftly fired from the basement librarian position and asked to please never come back, which I have to obey under the court order. But trust: It’ll be a long time before the library forgets the name Josie B. Reading.

Perfect woman achieves dreams, unsure what comes next
Breaking News! Kamila Garcia, Class of ’26, is unable to determine what to do next with her life. Kamila is currently known for being the youngest and only person to ever win, while still an undergraduate, Nobel Prizes in Physics, Chemistry, Physiology and Literature. Afterwards, she decided to re-focus on her studies and composed a medical school application essay in the form of a spoken word poem backed by a self-composed orchestral arrangement that she herself played. Many have gone on record saying, “The symphony was the best they have ever heard.” One medical admissions counselor, Gabrielle Sarico, told The Miscellany News that it “drove [her] to tears with its beauty,” and that she “[doesn’t] know if [she] will ever hear anything as beautiful again.” Now, after having been admitted to every medical school in the country, as well as every law school (her law application essays cannot be described through language alone), Kamila feels very… full.
“Many of my friends always say ‘Kamila, Kamila, what are you going to do now?’ And honestly, I’m very happy, so there’s not much I want to do. There are so many people who never get to experience what I’ve experienced, and the ones that do certainly don’t at my age. I’m grateful that my parents are still alive. I call them every night…so many people don’t have that luxury. l feel like everyone here is so go go go, it’s terrible for our health. I know that’s a crazy thing for me of all people to say, but I think it’s still true. I wouldn’t have accomplished half as much as I have if I didn’t concentrate on only a
few things. I only know four languages, I can’t sing and I’m terrible at talking to people. I’m lucky to have a dedicated agent who coaches me on how to talk to all these people, because I’d be hopeless otherwise. And let’s be honest, I have a lot of resources. How many others are there like me that don’t get to shine simply because society says they aren’t beautiful, or smart, or quick or strong enough? I’m not smart. I’m just capable.”
Kamila promptly commanded our transcriber’s pencil to stop writing, and it did. She then jumped 20 feet into the air onto a nearby streetlamp.
“You know where I learned how to do this? From an unhoused person on the streets of San Francisco. Do you know how unfair it is that someone who can jump four times their height can’t get a job, just because he got robbed of his house by the water company?”
Kamila then started monologuing, which our reporters were able to record by vigorously shaking the pencil awake.
“Thousands of families are dying, and I’m on television getting prizes. It’s not like I discovered the wheel, you know, and discovering new things only gets easier the further along you are in that discipline,” she said, jumping off of the street lamp and balancing herself on a nearby bush.
“I learned this trick from a starving child in Myanmar,” she said, displaying unparalleled grace while pulling up a hill from a single blade of grass, causing Taylor Hall’s bridge to become slightly lopsided. She then waved her hand, restoring the earth to normal.
“As I was saying, I don’t really know what else I want to do. I know there’s so many people I want to meet. I want to do so many
things for people. Did you know that even if you can talk to people’s viruses and tell you to stop, they still won’t let you skip the MCAT? I got extra credit for it though, so that’s nice [Kamila is currently the only person in the world to have scored a 550 on the Medical College Admission Test]. There’s a nice guy in my dorm, he’s pretty cute. Oh! Did you know the majority of American students can’t name more than twenty countries in any continent, even on our own? I don’t think that’s a problem with Americans though. I think it’s an exposure problem. We’re so interconnected and yet so distant from one another.” Kamila’s eyes, which shone with a deep brown color, seemed to burn holes into our reporters’ papers.
In 2024, Kamila underwent testing for various neglected tropical diseases as a result of a relief trip to various war-torn countries. Researchers discovered that her genetic code contained no mutations, and that any deviations from her genetic code may in fact be a mutation.
After a few hours of talking with The Miscellany News staff, Kamila decided the interview was over. “I’m kind of tired of talking with you guys. There’s just no point, you know? I’ve already said everything I want to say.” Kamila then raised her hand and rotated her arm backwards, lowering the ambient temperature by about five degrees Celsius. “A very kind woman at this college taught me that. But you have to be quadruple-jointed like me and her to do it. And it only affects about a volume of 400 square meters.”
“But Kamila! Is there anything you wish you could do differently?” we asked, desperate for more time with the celebrity.
“I wish I had gone into climate activism
sooner. But now nobody wants to listen about the climate. Or LLMs. Or war. Or the futility of gaining territory. Do you know how many board meetings I’ve attended? They say a lot in the war rooms, and not any of it would be more useful than if they all just talked to each other. But I doubt most of them would. They’re stupid like that. A lot of people are stupid. They think genetics, or what you did when you were a kid, or if you make money, define how important you are. Or that being important matters. A part of me wants me erased from the history books.” She paused, looking up to the sun, unflinching. It did seem to get a little darker. “That’s better,” she said.
She continued: “Hey! Everyone! No matter what you’ve heard, empathy is not a weakness! Remaining kind and composed is strength! Snapping back at someone is futile, and is failure! You must control yourself before you can help others! And do not seek to control, but to understand!” Kamila then stopped yelling, thankfully, because even our reporters’ ears were ringing, even though they were standing at the Deece.
“And honestly, I wish I could redo this interview…”
Breaking News! Kamila Garcia, Class of ’26, is unable to determine what to do next with her life. Kamila is currently known for being the youngest, and only person to ever win, while still an undergraduate, Nobel Prizes in Physics, Chemistry, Physiology and Literature.
“Nah. That’s okay. This’ll do as a wrap. And I think I know exactly what I want to do, now.”
With a flourish and fanfare, Kamila told us goodbye as she went to the Deece for dinner with her friends. Oh, and that guy, too.
An exclusive interview with Great Halloween Spirit
mid-August.
GHS: Those fu—
LPNY: What is your message to Dunkin?
Note this interview has been condensed and all claims that herpes stems from the consumption of watermelon (it came up more than you might think) have been removed. Any insults and name-calling by the Great Halloween Spirit do not reflect the views of the Legit Press of New York.
LPNY: Great Halloween Spirit, thank you for meeting with me.
GHS: Well, it’s not like I had anything else to do. We still have nearly two months until Halloween, but these bastards don’t know that.
LPNY: I see we’re getting right into it. What is your message to people and stores who are already buying and selling decorations for Halloween?
GHS: My message is quite simple. If you are buying Halloween decorations before the start of October, you are a dirty, ugly whore.
LPNY: You can’t say that!
GHS: What? Dirty, ugly whore is gender neutral.
LPNY: That’s not why! We don’t have the money to handle a defamation lawsuit.
GHS: Come on. It’s not like anyone’s going to read this.
LPNY: Hey. We can still be optimistic.
GHS: Oh please. Optimism died last November.
LPNY: Moving on. This conversation about early Halloween preparation–-
GHS: Also known as waking me up over a month early from my nap—
LPNY: —started when Dunkin began selling their pumpkin-based food and drinks in
GHS: Let me put this very eloquently.
LPNY: Finally.
GHS: If you are selling pumpkin products before October, may you die of syphilis, rot underground and burn in hell for eternity.
LPNY: You know all the stores and coffee shops do it, right?
GHS: Yes. My message is universal.
LPNY: You know what? I don’t get paid enough to deal with this. My next question was if you are excited that people get hyped for Halloween so early, but based on your previous answers, I’m going to guess not. Instead, I’ll ask you why this makes you so upset?
GHS: It’s very simple. I value my sleep. I already have to get less sleep than usual now that I’m required to handle Christmas after Santa dealt with the consequences of believing that freezing cold temperatures is an adequate form of birth control. Do you know how hard it is to function without enough sleep?
LPNY: Considering you refused to be interviewed unless it was 3 a.m., I certainly do.
GHS: As long as Halloween decorations are on shelves in stores, I am forbidden from sleeping.
LPNY: By who?
GHS: If I told you, I would have to kill you, which would be very unpleasant for you.
LPNY: I doubt it’s more painful than this interview.

GHS: Death by the Great Halloween Spirit involves a chainsaw, a rice cooker and a dildo.
LPNY: Okay. I’ll pass. Just to be clear, you sponsor a holiday where children knock on strangers’ doors and ask for candy, but you draw the line at decorating early.
GHS: Yes. Next question.
LPNY: I don’t care enough to press you further about early Halloween decor. Moving on. I just received word that Thanksgiving decorations were spotted in Alabama—
GHS: Doesn’t count.
LPNY: And Massachusetts.
GHS: That violates our custody agreement. That BITCH!
LPNY: You can’t call Thanksgiving a bitch.
GHS: First of all, what power does an underpaid journalist who lives with his coke-
head mother—
LPNY: Leave my mother out of this!
GHS: —have to stop me. Second of all, I was not calling Thanksgiving a bitch like a female dog. I was calling it a BITCH which is an acronym for a Bullshit Invented Tacky Colonialist Holiday.
LPNY: You know what, I don’t care anymore. Final question: What is your wish for those who carve pumpkins more than a week before Halloween?
GHS: Chlamydia.
LPNY: We are so getting sued for that.
GHS: Hey. This paper will finally be relevant.
LPNY: Ok. That concludes our time. It was not a pleasure. Enjoy your eternal existence.

ARIES March 21 | April 19
HOROSCOPES
Emma daRosa NOT at Waffle House
An acorn is going to fall right on your head this week. It may concuss you, it may not, who am I to say, really? What I do know is you’re going to have to fight the acorn. Godspeed.


TAURUS April 20 | May 20
You should enjoy the weather this week by planning a perfect fall day. Wear a cute sweater, eat 27 leaves of various colors, go apple picking, throw up 27 leaves of various colors.

GEMINI May 21 | June 20
Have you seen all the skunks around campus recently? Word on the street is they’re plotting to get you personally, and they’re very organized. I would stock up on tomato soup this week if I were you.

CANCER June 21 | July 22
Classes can be hard, but you know what’s harder? Slither.io. Future employers will be much more impressed with a honed Slither.io game than a high GPA. Forget homework, remember Slither.io.

LEO July 23 | Aug. 22
Someone has been planning to wash you in a washing machine for years, and now that it’s free, they’re about to strike. I’ve always wanted to be machine-washed, personally. Tell me how it is!

VIRGO Aug. 23 | Sept. 22
LIBRA Sept. 23 | Oct. 22
Vassar needs you to help get rid of the damn water chestnuts. You’re our only hope. Might I suggest starting a business selling lingerie woven out of the plants? #sidehustle #bossbabe

SCORPIO Oct. 23 | Nov. 21
You should absolutely not study abroad next year. I mean, first of all, that’s not really a nice way to refer to women anymore. Also, how long can you actually study one woman? Sounds pretty creepy to me. At least take her out to dinner first.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22 | Dec. 21
You might see a cute bear this week. I’ve always thought it’s a lie that bears would attack you if you gave them a little cuddle. Do with that what you will.

CAPRICORN Dec. 22 | Jan. 19
You should take a road trip this week. There’s a Waffle House only two hours away in Scranton. Actually, don’t do that. I want to do that. I better not run into ANY Vassar Capricorns at the Scranton, Pennsylvania Waffle House this week. Plan your own road trip, you stupid copycat!

AQUARIUS Jan. 20 | Feb. 18
I drowned my Sims’ husband and child this week so she could start fresh with the woman she was having an affair with. She’s pretty happy now. Maybe you should try the same thing?
It’s time to stop drinking wine during class. Not nearly strong enough. Start filling up your “Fearlessly Consequential” insulated mug with a margarita, or, ideally, straight tequila.

PISCES Feb. 19 | March 20
You’re looking to do some good in the world this week. You should try to close the orgasm gap! Buy a vibrator and give it to the first woman you see—it may even be the cashier. She’ll be so grateful for your philanthropy!
Life is going to be hell for Zohran Mamdani
Ian Watanabe Assistant Opinions Editor
This past summer, people from around the country were focused on one election. In New York City’s mayoral race, leftist Assemblyman Zohran Mamdani won the democratic primary against former Governor Andrew Cuomo. At the start of the campaign, Mamdani had comparatively little experience and backing. He relied on a short-form social media campaign and populist messaging around affordability, which won him 43.5 percent of the popular vote. Mamdani is slated to win in November by a 22 point margin, per the most recent poll released by Siena College. While he has been victorious so far, the assemblyman faces greater challenges, from his opponents to other major players. What is more, Mamdani’s troubles will not end if he wins. His public image will face scrutiny and attack both on the campaign trail, and in his potential mayoral career.
Mamdani has a focused agenda to freeze rents and improve public services. I cannot predict the future, so I cannot say whether or not these programs will actually work. But the message is already clear: If you are struggling, Zohran Mamdani will listen to you and help you. This message helps Mamdani deflect some labels that could be political black marks for other candidates. Opposing candidates have strongly emphasized that he is a socialist, pro-Palestine and anti-cop. Mamdani has not rejected the first two labels to win moderate support. Instead, he acknowledges those labels and frames himself as someone who cares about equality and human rights. He then focuses the conversation back to affordability. You do not need to read Marx to
want cheaper groceries. In the end, Mamdani leaves his opponents busy raving about socialism and Israel while he is talking about how he can save his voters’ money. His opponents look like conspiracy theorists while he looks approachable and helpful.
Although Mamdani can turn unpopular labels into positive ones, he may run into trouble from his anti-police past. The incumbent, Eric Adams, who won on an anti-crime platform, has brought up old tweets from Mamdani calling for the New York City Police Department (NYPD) to be defunded. Recently, Mamdani has walked back from these statements, instead focusing on improving relations between police and communities. He seeks to create a Department of Public Safety to tackle mental health and homelessness problems that would typically be handled by police. While these initiatives are more progressive than his opponents, he has clearly tried to abandon more radical rhetoric, including a 2020 X (formerly Twitter) post in which he characterized the NYPD as “a major threat to public safety.” Eric Adams, however, still has more support from the NYPD, getting a re-election endorsement back in July from 13 police unions, per The New York Times He and Cuomo have successfully pushed the message that Mamdani is weak on crime. According to Vera Action, crime is not as major an issue this election compared to cost of living, which Mamdani has been strong with. But, Mamdani’s efforts to build bridges with the NYPD will be hampered by their preference for other candidates, along with the anti-cop sentiment in his existing leftist base. In addition to flak on legitimate issues, Mamdani faces unconstructive slander. , which will not only come from his direct op-
ponents. The fact that this mayoral election is being followed all over the country should
While he has been victorious so far, the assemblyman faces greater challenges, from his opponents to other major players.
not be overlooked. People who cannot vote in New York City have formed opinions of the candidates and are paying attention to an election they normally would not. Larger Republican and Democrat figures are voicing either support or disapproval of Mamdani. President Donald Trump has directed his platform to drag his name through the mud. “I’m not gonna let this communist lunatic destroy New York,” Trump posted on social media. Trump has also, according to Associated Press (AP), offered to give Eric Adams a federal job if he drops out of the race, in order to keep the anti-Mamdani vote from being split. Rightwing politicians, media and citizens will have Mamdani under a microscope, waiting for him to fail. These are not normal conditions for a mayoral candidate to run or govern under.
Nevertheless, Mamdani has been dealing with outside slander in a way that energizes his supporters within the city. In a way, Trump’s own bombastic actions and statements already do this. The president, while gaining some ground in the 2024 election, still lost to a blue majority in New York City. It is safe to say that his popularity has not im-
proved since then. Mamdani could simply condemn Trump’s attempts to interfere and gain favor with a wary blue New York, but he has gone a step further. He emphasizes the investment Trump has in his opponents’ success, painting them as effectively puppets of the President. He has even gone as far as to challenge Donald Trump himself to a debate, posting on X, “Let’s cut out the middleman.” Trump is painting Mamdani as an existential socialist threat to Americans, while Mamdani is painting Trump as a puppetmaster trying to take over New York. While this rhetoric makes sense in the short term, it also follows a dreaded pattern I have been seeing among Democrats where they devote more time talking about Trump than issues. Trump’s behavior causes fear for the future, yes, but trying to leverage that fear and frustration leads to Democratic politicians and organizers closing their tent and disengaging with swing voters or past Republican voters. I believe they tried this last year and failed. Mamdani’s mandate is not to fight Trump. His mandate is to be the mayor of New York. Both Mamdani and his supporters should keep this in mind.
Is it fair that Trump can slander Mamdani while the candidate is constrained from doing the same? No. Mamdani prides himself on being an outsider in politics, and that means playing a game where everyone is against you. If he wins, it will not be because he “owned MAGA,” but because he got people from all sides of politics to rally around his policy. So yes, life is going to be hell for Zohran Mamdani. Everyone and their mother is trying to make him lose, and he cannot always fight back. But if he stays focused on the issues, he can win.
Why taking away trans people’s guns might end legal equity
President Trump is currently directing the Department of Justice (DOJ) to try to find a way to disarm transgender Americans and take away their access to firearms. This proposed action is largely under the vague and false notion that identifying as transgender innately makes someone mentally ill. From a quick glance, this is a sad addition to a continued row against transgender rights that has occurred throughout Trump’s second term, including the end of transgender service in the military. But, upon further inspection, this is terrifying. Gun rights are some of the most protected and enshrined within our current legal system, and the consequences of this attempt to yank them out of Trans American hands could be some of the most impactful when it comes to legal equity in this country.
Once it is clear that one right guaranteed to all citizens can be taken away, more could be eroded in subsequent cases.
Ever since the 2008 case of District of Columbia v. Heller, expansive gun rights are the constitutional law of the land. The author of the decision, Justice Antonin Scalia, empowered the operative clause of the Second Amendment, stating that the Constitution gives a right to bear arms regardless of the prefatory clause that, beforehand,
had denoted access to guns as connected to militia membership. Since then, almost every decision from the Supreme Court has extended and strengthened the rights outlined in the operative clause, one of which stands out. McDonald v. Chicago in 2010 tied the right to bear arms to the 14th Amendment, putting these rights under full federal protection and as fully equal across citizens.
If you did not take or—like me—took AP Government an eternity ago, here is a refresher on the 14th Amendment. Enacted as part of the post-Civil War amendments, the 14th Amendment outlines what a citizen is—born or naturalized in the United States—and that “No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens.” The McDonald case puts the right to bear arms under these protections, meaning they are guaranteed to citizens nationally and cannot be abridged by states. So how would this DOJ take away guns at the federal level when gun rights are literally tied to the rights of all citizens? The answer lies in another Supreme Court Case.
United States v. Rahimi, from 2024, is the rare outlier in that it is one of the only decisions the Supreme Court has decided this century that limits access to guns. Stemming from a domestic situation and the restraining order that followed, the decision found that an individual who poses a “credible threat” to the safety of others can be forced to give up their guns by a court. This is the opening that the DOJ will likely use, and it is a terrifyingly slippery slope from there.
Now, hypotheticals. If the DOJ were to, likely through an executive order or some -
thing of that magnitude, ban trans-identifying citizens of the United States from owning firearms, it would be brought to court almost instantly, likely by a queer and/or trans rights group. If brought all the way to the Supreme Court, things could get dicey fast. As seen through the advent of terms like “presidential actions” in Trump v. United States, the current Supreme Court will not hesitate to create new vague precedents that will be hashed out in later decisions. The creation of a new term, such as “disturbed individual,” or the connection at all directly between trans people and the “credible threat” precedent in Rahimi would have devastating consequences. This would pave the way for 14th Amendment rights to be waived under a notion of mental disturbance, with the definition of what makes someone disturbed and a “credible threat to safety” left largely in the hands of those with bad faith and persecution in mind.
All it would take is for one lawyer defending the DOJ to mention the presence of gender dysphoria in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) and the compliance of an already federally subservient Supreme Court to possibly downgrade the legal status of all trans-identifying Americans to a lower level. Once it is clear that one right guaranteed to all citizens can be taken away, more could be eroded in subsequent cases. But would this even end with one group?
Apropos to this push is another federal agency, the Department of Health, with Robert F. Kennedy Jr. at the helm. Kennedy has been outspoken recently on trying to find the origin of autism, along with other neurodivergent diagnoses such as ADD and ADHD. All of these are also in the
DSM-5, and, if the previous hypothetical goes into effect, could be the natural next target. For example, if an outspoken activist or politician has a legal diagnosis of autism, they could be classified as a “credible threat” or “disturbed individual,” and they are suddenly deprived of whatever rights the courts have decided that one classified as such does not have access to.
Of course, other groups in the LGBTQ community would also be clear next targets. Possibly in tandem with the reversal of gay marriage rights, the very notion of being gay could be slotted into this new legal precedent. The slippery slope referenced earlier takes a tailspin here. The creation of a new legal caste for Americans found to be innately mentally ill by the state is ripe for exploitation and could make hundreds of thousands of Americans have less legal rights than their fellow citizens..
The fallout from this fight over trans rights could bring out the ugliest elements of the increasingly heightened level of constitutional originalism across the legal world of America. As seen in the controversial paper of a Florida Law student a few months ago, the limits to this originalism are seemingly pushed further and further out. In this paper, the student argued that the rights outlined in the Constitution are not applicable to non-white people in the nation due to them not being imagined as part of the “original intent” outlined by the Founding Fathers. Fundamentally, it might not seem like another Trump-era intrusion on trans rights might have little impact. But, when it comes to how entrenched gun rights are without our current legal framework, it just might rock the boat in a way few could expect.
I hope you jive: An exploration of the beatnik way of life
Cailey Metter Guest Columnist
Jack Kerouac, Allen Ginsberg or really any cat with a beret and a goatee beating a drum at a poetry reading, these are all stereotypes of what the popular consensus thinks a beatnik can or should be, misconstrued and ill-categorized. The main focus of this article is not what a beatnik really was behind all the jazzy stereotypes, but their intrinsic human connection, embrace of silence and propensity for creation that I long for and idolize.
A large part of the beatnik counterculture was non-conformity. They opposed the “perfect” suburban diaper-changing way of life that was made famous in propaganda-type TV shows like “The Donna Reed Show” and “Leave it to Beaver.” I enjoy a good piece of ’50s media as much as the next square, but I find these pieces too saccharine, and not to mention that the women in these roles are always subservient, ready with a pie and a smile. No, the beatniks were not like these phonies on television. I value how they let loose and explored the inner darkness of their minds and the minds of those around them.
One of the most swinging activities was for a gang of young beats to sit together and create a poem one word at a time. Yes, they may have been passing around Mary Jane and a miscellaneous bottle, but I find that the human connection was still there. The rhymes and words floated above their heads, and their poems were eventually lost to their own memories.
There was this unimaginable connection between beatniks and poetry, poetry and jazz and jazz and beatniks, with words flowing in and out them, unrestricted and unbound. They would experiment with setting free verse to jazz and improvising, letting their words like honey, drip, drip out of the corners of their mouths. For example, Jack Kerouac has some excellent poems that I adore, set to
jazz with Steve Allen on the keys. Kerouac’s accent blends his Franco-American upbringing with his adult years in New York, and he seems to move through vowels as if he is stuck to them. Beatniks glorified spoken word poetry. I find it so intimate and immediately feel an unspeakable connection to an author when I hear poems instead of listlessly reading them off a page. It is this idea of connection both in words and in emotion that makes me keep coming back to the beatniks and their far-out ideology.
Of course, Kerouac is a very controversial figure: with the drugs, the alcohol use, abandonment of his child, his hatred and odd way of seeing the world. I have read Kerouac’s 1957 novel “On the Road,” which many consider to be the epitome of the beat movement. Controversial as it is, I liked it. Although, it was difficult to look past some of its ugly parts, such as its mistreatment of women and minorities. Though, this is a classic struggle of the separation of art and artists, a struggle that many educated people are battling internally and externally. When you read the novel, you must listen to jazz in the background. Jazz is the heartbeat of the story and the heartbeat of the beat generation, a generation that played with the similarities of music and poetry, words written and beats played.
I tell you, though, I cannot shake that beat feel. For such a controversial novel, I find myself coming back to it, craving the freedom and intellectual connection that the characters in the novel share amongst themselves. I yearn for those freedom tales of hitchhiking across the U.S. and the idealized country it describes. I long for the descriptions of young people sitting amongst themselves, talking of literature and philosophy with nothing to distract them. I love “On the Road” because of the feeling it inspires: the beat feel. I am inspired by the tone of the novel.
Every time I read it, it seems to engulf me because it champions human connection and
human creativity. In this novel, Kerouac was so intertwined with the American landscape that he seemed to have it imprinted on his skull. He championed the beatnikian tenet of connection: mind, body and, of course, soul, an immersive connection that I am madly trying to find. There may be no concrete plot within the novel, but it is a poem, line by line, disguised in prose form. It is also a story of spiritual transformation of the mind and body, where the main character’s journey has no real destination except for complete transformation. I often find that transformation can lead to creation, inspiring a person to look deeper within themselves for ideas.
While today we may have revolutionaries, their modern-age brains lack the inherent connectivity that the beatniks had, a connection to their work and to each other.
A grim fact that we have to cope with is that fewer and fewer people read, and fewer and fewer people create. Instead, their spirit and creativity begins to wither away, until they purchase a home in Dullsville. As this trend grows and grows, it is no wonder that many others and I crave a type of beatnik literary connection and creation.
I feel a strong connection to the beatniks, whether that be due to my longing to share poetry with others, my admiration for jazz and the great beatnik authors or my persistent flaw of idealizing the past. Whatever the cause may be, I adore the beatniks and their jazzy way of life. I understand that jazz cafes still exist and people share awful poems
now the same as they did back then. Nonetheless, some secret part of me longs for the second-hand smoke and unsupervised world of the beatniks, a world where my wretched rhymes and blasted meter would not be videoed. I long for a little cranny on a beatnik stole, wearing my beret and striped sweater, cigarette in mouth, poetry in hand and ears open solely for the snaps and the sax.
Of course, this boils down my primitive longing for connection sans technology, a world that seems impossible in this mechanized pile of ashes burning down, and down and down, destroying human connection and culture. Even as a collection of rubble and rocks, America would still be divided.
Possibly, one reason I put the people of the past on a pedestal is their ability to sit in silence. Even the poorest and most uneducated man could sit alone with his thoughts, breathe and listen to nature. Technology takes away people’s inherent connection to the world around them. It dulls us, medicating our senses until our hearts are numb, having been on a block of ice for too long. This is what the powerful do not want the proletariat to do. In silence, countercultures start and uprisings can take shape. As the beatniks rebelled against the conservative ’50s, we must read and talk about art and culture in a silent rebellion. There must be a push against what is soft and what is comfortable. While today we may have revolutionaries, their modern-age brains lack the inherent connectivity that the beatniks had, a connection to their work and to each other. In my mind, the modern world appears to be glossed over in a chrome film, flashy and shiny, but materialistic and lacking the human connection that was so integral to the beatnik philosophy.
I find it to be essential that the words and soul-intertwining rhymes of the beatniks forever continue to beat, beat, beat their way into the minds of people everywhere looking for jazz and a couple of cats to share it with.

Previewing NCAA Division I Women’s Volleyball 2025
Holland Kaplan Design Editor
As September continues to soar by, there is one thing on my mind in the sports world: college volleyball. Arguably one of the most popular collegiate sports, volleyball has skyrocketed our screens the past couple years, and as a player, I love to see it. This year, there are a lot of hot contenders like Nebraska and Texas that continue to stay at the top.
The 2025 season is shaping up to be one of the most competitive yet. Nebraska sits firmly at No.1 in the latest Power 10 rankings, University of Texas at Austin follows at No.2, and Stanford, Pittsburgh and Penn State are right there in the mix. Between powerhouse rosters, coaching storylines and high-stakes early matchups, fans can expect a season packed with drama from start to finish.
Nebraska: A New Era Begins
Nebraska always enters the fall as the team to beat, even as the program transitions to new leadership. Legendary Head Coach John Cook retired in the offseason, handing control to former Louisville Coach Dani Busboom Kelly, a Husker alum who knows the
culture inside and out. Despite the change, Nebraska has been off to a hot start. The Huskers are currently 8-0, and the success does not stop there. In their first match, they beat Pitt in just four sets, establishing the tone for a new era of Nebraska volleyball.
Setter Bergen Reilly, outside hitter Harper Murray and middle blockers Andi Jackson and Rebekah Allick headline a lineup with both star power and experience. For me, the most exciting part is watching Laney Choboy and Olivia Mauch battle for the libero spot. They are big shoes to fill, and I cannot wait to see who ends up in the jersey by the end of the season.
Texas: Stacked Once Again
The Longhorns are no strangers to championship expectations and 2025 is no different. Ranked second behind Nebraska and currently 5-0, Texas bolstered its already lethal offense with the addition of Torrey Stafford, a transfer from Pitt and one of the nation’s most dynamic attackers. With Stafford joining a squad already bursting with firepower, Texas will be tough to contain. If Texas can keep their momentum, I think they will be a formidable force against opponents.
Stanford: Steady, Skilled and Scary
Stanford enters the season with the kind of depth that makes them a dangerous threat in any tournament. They never receive the same hype or publicity as Nebraska does, but they have the tools to make it far. Stanford played Texas on Sunday, Sept. 7, and it was the most anticipated match of the preseason so far with Texas beating them in five sets. Senior outside hitter Elia Rubin continues to make waves, averaging 3.27 kills per set. As the season continues, it will be interesting to see them find their footing and remain with the best of the best.
Pittsburgh: Breaking Through the Ceiling
Year after year, Pitt has been knocking at the door of the national title, and 2025 may finally be the year they break through.
Rightside Olivia Babcock, the reigning National Player of the Year, leads the Panthers’ offense, giving them a cannon that teams need to camp on. Losing Torrey Stafford to Texas stings, but their core remains strong so far. The early clash at Nebraska was a tough watch, but I reckon Pitt will be back for revenge later in the season.
Penn State: Defending the Crown
As the defending national champions,
Penn State carries the pressure of proving last year was no fluke. Coach Katie Schumacher-Cawley returns a veteran squad, but the early weeks have already exposed some cracks. Star sophomore setter Izzy Starck recently announced she has decided to step away from volleyball this season to prioritize her mental health after the first five games of the 2025 season. I think this opened a lot of fans’ eyes to see that playing a college sport can be mentally taxing, even if you are on one of the best teams in the country. Besides that loss, the Big Ten grind will not offer many breathers, meaning Penn State needs to rediscover its dominance as soon as possible.
The Bottom Line
Nebraska may have the No.1 ranking, but the gap between each of the top five teams is razor thin. Texas looks reloaded, Stanford has the experience to crash the party, Pitt is hungry, and Penn State knows what it is like to win on the biggest stage. As the nonconference battles continue for the next couple of weeks, 2025 women’s volleyball promises fireworks and could be one of the most exciting seasons in years. When Nebraska and Texas finally collide, it could decide who rules the court in 2025.
NFL Week 2 keeps drama high
The NFL this Sunday was an action-packed slate with some high-scoring blowouts and jaw-clenching second-half comebacks. Unexpectedly, we witnessed lower-quality teams show up and nearly come out on top as underdogs. Before we dive into the close games, there were some complete blowouts. The Baltimore Ravens blew the Cleveland Browns out of the water with a hefty win of 41-17. While it took Lamar Jackson and the Ravens time to find some momentum, Jackson finished with 225 passing yards and four touchdowns. The Ravens were also solid on the defensive front and found an interception against Joe Flacco, who only had 199 passing yards and a single touchdown to Cedric Tillman.
The Detroit Lions put up a dominating 52 points against the Chicago Bears’ 21 points. Jared Goff led Detroit to a victory, throwing for 334 yards with five passing touchdowns. The unstoppable force of Amon-Ra St. Brown put up an electric performance with three touchdowns and 122 yards off nice receptions, while “Sonic and Knuckles” combined for 165 rushing yards and two touchdowns. Additionally, an honorable mention goes out to Jameson Williams for his first touchdown of the season, trailing St. Brown with 108 receiving yards. While the Lions were heavy on the offensive side, their defense was able to put up one interception and four sacks against Caleb Williams and the Bears. The Bears’ offense was mostly quiet; however, Rome Odunze dropped 128 yards and two touchdowns off seven receptions—a great rebound after a quiet Week 1.
The Buffalo Bills scored 30 points while holding the New York Jets to 10 points. The passing game was lacking for all quarterbacks who touched the field today in this game. As a result, the explosive James Cook took the reins from Josh Allen, rushing for 135 yards and securing two touchdowns. For the Jets, tight end Jeremy Ruckert scored their only touchdown, and both Justin Fields and second-string quarterback Tyrod Taylor had a terrible performance.
Overall, this game was very uneventful. Lastly, although the first half was a close game, the Los Angeles Rams had a bounceback win against the Tennessee Titans, closing the game 33-19. Matthew Stafford threw for nearly 300 yards for two touchdowns to Puka Nacua and Devante Adams. Nacua exploded for 136 receiving yards on eight receptions, and Adams trailed with 106 receiving yards on six receptions. Cam Ward, the rookie quarterback on the Titans, had a solid showing with 175 passing yards and one touchdown. However, as the season continues, I expect him to improve his passing game and find a better connection with Tony Pollard.
There were a few close games on Sunday. The New England Patriots faced one of their biggest conference division rivals in the Miami Dolphins. The Patriots held a tight lead throughout the whole game, but it was a much better performance for the Dolphins after an awful start to the season in a Week 1 blowout against the Indianapolis Colts. Miami running back De’Von Achane had a great showing of 11 carries for 122 yards and a touchdown. Tua Tagovailoa threw for 315 yards and two touchdowns. Yet his core receivers, Jaylen Waddle and Tyreek Hill, could not find the endzone, leaving the Dolphins a touchdown shy in another loss of 27-33. For the Patriots, quarterback Drake Maye threw for 230 yards and two touchdowns, backed by a strong running game from Stevenson and Gibson, combining for a touchdown and 160 rushing yards.
The Seattle Seahawks faced off against the Pittsburgh Steelers. It was a seesaw battle with both teams exhibiting some hard defense and lead changes quarter to quarter up until the start of the fourth. The Seahawks soared away from the Steelers, dropping 17 points and an interception to seal the game. Sam Darnold threw for 295 yards and two touchdowns, with heavy contributions coming from Jaxson Smith-Njigba and Cooper Kupp. The Steelers did not step up to the plate as Rodgers ended with only one touchdown and 203 yards. Seattle receiver DK Metcalf did connect with Rogers for a touchdown; however, he only put up 20 yards in the matchup.
The San Francisco 49ers matched up
against the New Orleans Saints this week and gave their fans a scare, almost letting the Saints have a comeback run in the second half. However, the 49ers defense showed up again, edging out the Saints 26-21. Nevertheless, the 49ers continue to struggle with injuries, with Brock Purdy, George Kittle, Brandon Aiyuk and Kyle Juszczyk out. Accordingly, San Francisco quarterback Mac Jones showed up off the bench, passing for 279 yards and three touchdowns. Additionally, Christian McCaffrey has proved once again his high value to this team, rushing for 55 yards complemented by 52 yards off catches and one touchdown. Spencer Rattler played surprisingly well with 207 passing yards and three touchdowns, while Alvin Kamara ran for 120 yards. This team, however, continues struggling to really find a groove and prove that they can be contenders in this league.
Now for the games we have all been waiting for. The Denver Broncos had an upsetting loss to the Indianapolis Colts, who stormed back in the second half to barely beat the Denver Broncos 29-28. Daniel Jones aired out the ball for 316 yards but only left the field with one touchdown to Jonathan Taylor, who had a generational game, ending with 165 rushing yards and 50 receiving yards. Colts kicker Spencer Shrader knocked down five straight field goals, helping the team get points up on the scoreboard, eventually icing the game with a 45-yard game-winner. On the other side of the field, Bo Nix had 206 passing yards and three touchdowns to Franklin, Mims Jr. and Adam Trautman. Despite these touchdowns, it was a sad day to be a Broncos fan as their kicker Will Lutz missed a 42-yard field goal to put the game away. The Colts have now improved to 2-0, making a statement for a possible strong playoff team.
In another game highlighted by a kicker, the Dallas Cowboys took a narrow victory over the New York Giants. Cowboys kicker Brandon Aubrey had four straight field goals, including a 64-yard bullet. The Cowboys won 40-to-37 with an overtime walkoff field goal to take their first win at home. This game was loaded with offense, with Dak Prescott throwing for 361 yards and
Russel Wilson throwing for a career-high monstrous 450 yards. Giants receivers Malik Nabers and Wan’Dale Robinson combined for 309 yards and three touchdowns, but it was simply no match for Brandon Aubrey’s historic performance.
In a compelling match-up, the Jacksonville Jaguars almost upset the Cincinnati Bengals. In the end, the Bengals fought back in the second half to shoot out the Jaguars 31-27. Unfortunately, Joe Burrow left the game early with turf toe and will sit out for at least three months following surgery: a devastating blow for Bengals fans. While the Bengals have started the season 2-0, the future of this team is iffy. On a positive note, backup quarterback Jake Browning seemed confident on the field, throwing for 241 yards and two touchdowns. He will need to tighten up some throws, as he ended the game with three interceptions. Ja’Marr Chase ended with 165 yards and one touchdown off 14 receptions, but will now be the focal point for the team moving forward, especially with Burrow out. The Jaguars do not have any players that stood out this week, but have shown lots of improvement from last season. Trevor Lawrence has continued to show that he is not the quarterback the league thought he would be, throwing two interceptions and completing 24 of 42 attempts.
And for the game of the day and a Super Bowl rematch, the Philadelphia Eagles faced off against the Kansas City Chiefs. This game was a nail-biter with the Eagles ultimately walking away with their second win of the season in a 20-17 finish. After a dominant Week 1 performance, Jalen Hurts fell short, only passing for 101 yards and a rushing tush-push touchdown. Saquon Barkley rushed for 94 yards and got himself a well-deserved touchdown. For the Chiefs, this team has advanced to 0-2 and has raised questions of if this season is the final nail in the coffin for this team. Mahomes looks shaky, completing 16 of 29 passing attempts for 187 yards and a singular touchdown. Additionally, with how poorly Travis Kelce has played, I wonder if it may be time for retirement with Taylor Swift. Granted, Xavier Worthy and Rashee Rice are still out, but the Chiefs need to find their offense again.
Our goal with Brewers Ballin’ is to feature Vassar athletes who starred for their team the week previous to publishing. If you would like to nominate an athlete, please email hfrance@vassar.edu.
Brewers Ballin’: McAusland continues dominating Brewers Ballin’

Name: Maura McAusland
Year: Junior
Team: Women’s Volleyball
Stats: Maura McAusland, the Two-Time All Liberty League Second Team selection, has picked up right where she left off. McAusland was named The Kylie Intfen National Offensive player of the week after averaging 3.2 kills per set on a scorching .443 hitting percentage and leading the Brewers to a 7-1 start. On defense, McAusland has tallied 59 digs while averaging a career best 2.95 digs per set.
Statement: “The season has been a blast so far, and a big part of that is our new coach and new players. We have more newcomers than we do returners this year, and they really bring great talent and energy to the team.”
Recently in Vassar Brewers sports
Men’s Soccer Topples #13 Oneonta on Senior Day
The Class of ’26 crew of Patrick Gale, Otis Wildman, Diego Pastor-Valverde, Jared Fiske and Bevan Howard were honored prior to the 3-1 victory where Arden Tobolski ’28 tabbed four points and a Liberty League Offensive Performer of the Week honor.
Women’s Volleyball Keeps on Rolling
With a strong young core, the women’s volleyball team has gotten off to a strong 7-1 start amidst their five-game win-streak.
Field Hockey Nets OT Game-Winner
Julia Morris ’29 scored her second goal of the season in a double-OT winner to earn a 3-2 road victory over Smith College. She was honoured as this week’s Liberty League Rookie of the Week.

GAMES
The Miscellany Crossword
First Impressions
By: Sadie Keesbury

ACROSS
1. Poisonous chemical element
8. Trade preventer
15. Temporary computers, for example
16. Shoreside realty boon
17. Mosque tower
18. Corpus _____
19. Walker, Cooper or Monroe
20. Sweet pet name
21. Type of bar for a Mai Tai
24. Stopping
28. Leader who might have new clothes, for short
31. _____ we now our gay apparel
32. Org. for those 50+
33. Apple alternative
35. What you might do on the first day of class, or a way to describe the red squares
40. _____ of Wight
41. British bathroom
42. Ten cent piece
43. Apples to oranges, to give an unfair
example
47. _____ Squalor, Lemony Snicket villain
48. Famous Musk
49. [Author’s mistake]
51. Unhappy
52. With pointed ears, maybe
55. “Hello? (hello),” for example
57. Sch. for cooking nearby
58. 28A, for example
62. What a bunny might ask for at the salon
67. Smut
69. 100 centavos
70. Crème brûlée dish
71. Stylist Vidal or his brand
72. Where you might put a slice of cheese, in a diner
DOWN
1. _____ Mater
2. Bubble, as pasta water
3. Prefix for -derm or -tizer
4. Do
5. Greek water nymph
6. Anger, to a crossword puzzler
7. Midwest winter hours
8. Key above the tilde
9. “It’s just ok”
10. Where to get a drink
11. Ex-bassist Kaplan of Pentatonix
12. Sunak of the UK
13. Board, as a boat
14. In debt to
22. Pond fish
23. 45°, for example
24. Slang for butt
25. Hearer
26. I am, you ____
27. Little digger
28. Like the Aeneid or the Odyssey
29. Prefix with -american or -potamian
30. Psychic’s reading materials
34. Ward off
36. Ovoid lip balms
37. Face painted band
38. Brown of the Miscellany News
39. Lou of jazz
44. Muhammad of boxing
45. English acronym for South Korea
46. What you get from a 60D
50. Big browser
52. “Hello? (hello) Hello? (hello),” for example
53. Juliana nickname
54. Bus costs
56. External
59. “Do you _____ _____ him?” (middle school question)
60. Vape device, casually 61 “You _____?”
63. Season parts, for short
64. Head businessperson, abbr.
65. Underwater alien craft, perhaps
66. A lot
67. Ranch suffix
68. Toyota _____4
