INSPIRED BY
ARTICLE PETER WIERE
DIVORCE MEDIATION:
CREATING AGREEMENTS FOR LIFE
WHAT DO WE KNOW ABOUT DIVORCE? It can be a scary, emotionally devastating and financially destructive process that can cause
DIVORCE ISSUES
long-term damage to families, especially children, but is that inevitable? Interestingly, after over 25 years of divorce mediation experience, I’ve learned and witnessed how mediation can resolve otherwise difficult situations with a minimum of aggravation, and that the agreements reached can be understood by both parties, achievable, implemented, adhered to and upheld over time.
A typical divorce addresses three primary issues:
01 02 03
the division of property, a parenting plan and establishment of a child/spousal support arrangement.
In California, a no-fault community property state, the requirements are relatively straightforward. The division of property, or who gets what, can be
How is that possible? Each divorce is unique,
a complicated process, but whether they have millions or barely two nickels
and there isn’t “just one way to resolve the sit-
to rub together, each person is entitled to half of the community property,
uation,” regardless of how complex or simple.
while distinguishing between community and separate property.
There is no “right or wrong,” “good or bad” or
Parenting plans should be based on each family’s unique situation and
“only way” to resolve each situation. With so
decided upon by the parents rather than a judge. Through the years many things
many variables, from personal idiosyncrasies
will change before the kids are “on their own,” from employment and living sit-
and emotional stability of the parties, to finances,
uations, to a child’s developmental needs, to changing parental circumstances.
children and more involved, a good mediator
Mediation enables families to develop an initial plan that can be tweaked as nec-
provides an environment that is supportive,
essary, without “driving a wedge” between the parents and/or children.
nonjudgmental and respectful while objectively
A plan for child and spousal support often presents significant challenges
taking into consideration all of the factors, alter-
for divorcing couples. Making the change from one household to two and
native solutions and their consequences.
shared custody of children can be complex, especially regarding finances. A
The result, which usually occurs in a 4- to 8-month time period, can enable healing as well as be very cost-effective.
mediator can help with child and spousal support guidelines, tailoring them to each family’s unique financial situation and resources. Although during the proceedings, the divorce itself seems central to life,
Although divorces can be complex, very
establishing a base for the long term is even more central. Mediation will
rarely do situations boil down to a legal prec-
help you set up a way of thinking and an agreement that can fundamentally
edent or particular law dictating the resolution,
last a lifetime.
rather it is often the mutual decisions of the parties that dictate, and with the help of a mediator, mutually agreed upon decisions are achievable.
To learn more about divorce mediation and receive a free consultation, contact Peter Wiere at Wiere Mediation at 805.523.8898.
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Conejo Valley Lifestyle | June 2019