GET GRIEFY
M A G A Z I N E
At Get Griefy Magazine, our mission is to illuminate the path to healing and hope for those navigating the profound journey of loss. We are dedicated to creating a compassionate and empowering space where individuals living with grief can find solace, inspiration, and a sense of community. Our commitment is to go beyond the conventional narratives surrounding grief and loss, acknowledging that life after loss is not only about mourning but also about embracing the strength to live fully. Get Griefy Magazine seeks to redefine the conversation around grief, providing authentic stories, expert insights, and practical resources that empower our readers to navigate their grief journey with resilience and purpose. We aspire to foster connection and understanding, bridging the gap between those who are grieving and the support they need. Through a blend of heartfelt narratives, expert advice, and uplifting content, we aim to inspire our readers to not only survive but to thrive in the face of loss. Get Griefy Magazine is more than a publication; it is a lifeline for those on the path of healing. Join us as we navigate grief together, fostering a community that celebrates life, resilience, and the enduring spirit that emerges from the depths of loss.
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MAGAZINE GET GRIEFY
Editor-In-Chief and Founder
Kera Sanchez
Special Correspondant
Collective
Collective
Collective
Collective
Guest Contributor Diane Hullet
Guest Contributor
Cover Photography
GuidingCompass
Editor’sNote
KeraSanche
If only there were a pill something we could toss back with our morning coffee that made the grief of a future lost more bearable.
For me, that future was watching my mom transform into a grandmother. It was seeing her enjoy the retirement she so deeply deserved after 30 years in education. It was spending more time with my partner in crime.
But that future vanished on June 11, 2022. I was in the NICU with my youngest daughter when I got the call. My vibrant, vivacious, adventurous, and zesty mom had suddenly and unexpectedly died while on vacation in Naples, Italy.
The days, weeks, and months that followed were both a blur and strangely vivid. The pain was psychological and physical. Grief tangled itself around the joy of welcoming my second child a cruel emotional paradox that felt like an episode of Punk’d. I kept waiting for Ashton Kutcher to jump out and yell, “Gotcha! She’s alive!”
But the moment never came. Reality sank in, and I sank into a fog I couldn’t shake. My mind looped endlessly: How did she die? Why did she die? What didn’t I say? What didn’t I do? It was like trying to live life with a painful, persistent pop-up window interrupting every thought, action, and mood.
At the start, I longed for a quick fix a kind of griefy Ozempic to dull the ache. But what if there isn’t supposed to be a fix? What if the valleys of grief are part of the map? What if these moments are essential to our growth, to seeing the bigger picture?
If that’s the case, maybe what we need isn’t a cure, but a compass. Something to guide us in the fog. A way to take small, meaningful steps forward as we grow into new, more seasoned versions of ourselves
In this issue, that’s what I hope to offer you a compass A travel-inspired tool fitting, since my mom’s favorite pastime was seeing the world to help you navigate the moments, milestones, and messy in-betweens after a loss
Personally, I’m working on defining what those directional guideposts are what keeps me moving when the road is unclear For me, they are community, creativity, connection, and comedic relief These are the pillars I aim to instill into every issue of Get Griefy because even on the darkest detours, we deserve to find moments of light, laughter, and meaning
So consider me your griefy tour guide on this detour not the final destination No matter what or who you’re grieving, I believe these guideposts will help you find direction, and maybe even some unexpected beauty, on the road ahead
B o r d e r l i
Living in the heart of New Orleans, Karen Gros carries the rhythm of the bayou in her soul resilient, raw, and deeply connected to the stories around her A storyteller of light and loss, she is a woman who has walked through the deepest shadows of grief and emerged with a camera in one hand and words in the other Her journey is one of tragedy and transformation, of finding beauty in the broken and meaning in the aftermath
On September 19, 2011, her world shattered Her 18-year-old son, Garrett, died by suicide, crashing his car into a tree The news didn’t come in a phone call or from authorities it came in the cruelest way imaginable, through a breaking news article she stumbled upon online The name hadn’t been released yet, but she knew She recognized the mangled car in the grainy photo She knew in her bones, the way only a mother can
The days after his death were a haze of grief, regret, and isolation. “Suicide grief is different it is self-destruction, endless questions without answers ” Karen reflects She tore herself apart, replaying every moment, trying to find the missing pieces Friends fell away, her photography business dried up, and she lost 30 pounds in three months.
Her young marriage didn’t survive either. Overwhelmed by sorrow, she left home, moving in first with her parents, then to New Orleans. But grief does not care about geography In her lowest moment, she swallowed 80 prescription pills She woke up in the ICU, then in a mental health facility meant for those with nowhere else to go But it was there, among people who had lost everything, that she found a sliver of clarity She had resources She had a way to survive
Long before Garrett’s death, photography had been her passion. A classically trained pianist, she had been forced to stop playing after carpal tunnel surgeries. She picked up a camera instead, drawn to architectural ruins the haunting beauty of decay, the whispers of forgotten places But after Garrett died, photography became something else entirely: survival
bsessing
Behind the Lens with New Orleans
Based Photographer Karen D. Gros
Photography by Karen D Gros
One of her most profound projects was Oak Cradle, a book that began long before she knew the role grief would play in her life In 2011, she collaborated on a series of images in a historic Louisiana home photos of a mourning woman dressed in black, surrounded by heirlooms and memories Ninety days later, she became that woman.
Years later, poet Chantel L. Carlson discovered those images and felt their weight Their conversations about loss and survival led to Oak Cradle, a collection of Gros’ photographs paired with Carlson’s poetry What started as an artistic exploration became something far greater: a beacon for those navigating the depths of grief
Photography and grief, Gros has found, share an undeniable connection Both force you to see differently, to notice what others overlook After Garrett’s death, her camera became more than a tool it became a way to find light in the wreckage. She no longer saw ruins as just decay, but as proof of resilience. She no longer saw grief as just an ending, but as a transformation Survival itself became an art form
Today, Gros shares her journey through writing She brings her raw, unfiltered reality to Substack, where she writes about grief, survival, and rebuilding a life after loss Writing, like photography, has given her a voice when feelings were too difficult to express out loud
For those grieving, she offers this: There is no right way to survive. Grief will change you, but that change does not have to be destruction It can be rebirth It can be creation It can be something uniquely yours Just as she found solace in photography, in words, in telling the truth of her pain, she encourages others to find their own way forward one step, one breath, one moment at a time
The Cajun spirit is one of resilience, of holding onto the past while building something new In the heart of New Orleans, where life and loss dance together in the streets, Karen D Gros is proof that even after the darkest storm, there is still light to be found.
Learn more about Karen by following her on Instagram @borderline obsessing and subscribe to her Substack at obsessivelyyours substack com Oak Cradle is available on Amazon
Pictured: Karen’s Son, Garrett
Pictured: Karen
A F T E R L I F E A F T E R L I F E
Death is not the end; it is merely a transition While grief can be overwhelming, the truth remains that our loved ones never truly leave us. They continue to exist beyond the physical realm, offering their love, guidance, and reassurance in ways that transcend our earthly understanding Through the work of intuitive medium Susan Grau, we find compelling evidence that the afterlife is real, and that our connections with those who have passed remain unbroken.
Susan Grau’s journey into understanding the afterlife began at a young age when she had a near-death experience (NDE) This profound moment gave her firsthand insight into what lies beyond our physical world a place of unconditional love and peace As she describes, "That experience forever changed my understanding of life and death, but it didn’t exempt me from the human experience of loss " From that moment on, her life’s mission has been to bridge the gap between the living and the departed, offering hope, validation, and healing to those navigating grief
Grief is one of the most profound human experiences, and for Susan, it has been deeply personal. She has endured the loss of her mother, both of her brothers to suicide, and the tragic murder of her uncle Additionally, she has grieved the loss of not being able to carry children of her own Despite her deep spiritual understanding, these losses still shook her to the core However, her ability to communicate with those in Spirit has provided her with an undeniable truth our loved ones are never truly gone "Being able to connect with my loved ones in Spirit has given me the reassurance that they are not gone they are just in a different form, still loving me, still guiding me. "
The signs of Spirit’s presence manifest in many ways: a sudden song on the radio that carries a special meaning, a dream so vivid it feels like a visit, a butterfly landing on your shoulder at just the right time These are not mere coincidences; they are whispers from the other side, gentle reminders that love transcends death. As Susan explains, "Spirit always finds a way to reach you whether through dreams, synchronicities, or those profound moments of knowing "
Through her work as a medium, Susan has helped countless people find solace in the knowledge that their departed loved ones continue to watch over them She has witnessed undeniable validations messages so specific and deeply personal that they leave no doubt that Spirit is present Her work brings reassurance to the grieving, reminding them that the bond they share with their loved ones is unbreakable, even by death
One of the most important lessons Susan shares is that grief is not about letting go; rather, it is about learning a new way to hold on. "Grief is not something we bypass, even with a deep understanding of the afterlife it is something we walk through, something we live with, something that forever changes us " It is about integrating loss into our lives and understanding that even though our loved ones are no longer physically present, their love remains The journey of grief is not linear, and it does not have an endpoint It is something we learn to carry, a transformation that reshapes us, allowing us to find meaning and connection in a new way
Susan’s book, Infinite Life, Infinite Lessons, was written to help people navigate their own grief journeys "Writing this book was not a labor of love it was painful Every word required me to relive my own losses, to revisit the moments that broke me open, and to share truths that I have learned not only through my own experiences but through my connection with Spirit " Every page is infused with the wisdom and experiences she has gathered not only through her own profound losses but also through the thousands of souls she has connected with It is a guide for those seeking answers about life, the afterlife, and the enduring nature of love
For those who fear death or struggle with grief, Susan offers a perspective that is both comforting and transformative She reminds us that we have experienced grief in many forms throughout our lives from childhood transitions to lost relationships and we have always found a way to move forward She describes grief as "love in another form It is the love that has nowhere to go, the love that aches for what once was " Instead of resisting grief, she encourages embracing it, allowing it to teach and transform us
Birth and death are not opposites; they are part of the same cycle Just as we enter this world, we will one day leave it, but death is not an ending it is a return to love Susan’s NDE gave her a glimpse into this truth, revealing that death is a homecoming, a transition into a place of peace and unity "My near-death experience showed me that what we call ‘death’ is not darkness or emptiness It is not something to be feared. It is a homecoming, a return to the very love we have spent our entire lives searching for "
If there is one undeniable truth that Susan wants people to take away, it is this: "Love never dies." The connections we form in this life extend beyond the physical world. Our loved ones are still with us, guiding, protecting, and loving us from the other side Even in moments of deep sorrow, we are never truly alone
Grief will change us it will stretch us, break us open, and reshape our understanding of life and death But in that transformation, we find something beautiful: the realization that love is eternal When we learn to listen, to see the signs, and to trust in the unseen, we discover that the ones we miss are still near "The grief doesn’t leave us, we incorporate it into our lives, thus changing the landscape of our journey "
Through Susan Grau’s work, we are reminded that even in our darkest moments, hope remains Connection remains Love remains Death is not the end it is merely a doorway to a different kind of presence, a different kind of love, one that never fades, never leaves, and never dies
THE DAY SHE DIES youbecomeherlegacy
ABOUT THIS BOOK
Losing your mother means gaining a new companion—grief. Chelsea Ohlemiller shares her journey of loss to help you with yours. Her honest reflections on heartbreak, love, and hope can give you words when you ' re speechless. This book is for anyone facing the loss of a mother, offering a compassionate friend for the journey ahead.
ALICE CUTLER MISS LONDON 2024, SHOWS THAT GRIEF, RESILIENCE, AND GRIT CAN CREATE A BEAUTY THAT INSPIRES AND EMPOWERS.
Alice Cutler’s journey has been one of profound grief, resilience, and eventual triumph. At first glance, her journey may seem unlikely, but Alice has turned her devastating losses into a platform for growth, personal achievement, and advocacy. Today, as Miss London 2024, Alice is using her story and platform to bring awareness to an often-overlooked issue: bereavement leave. Her tireless advocacy, along with her heartwarming initiative to support others through grief, has been nothing short of inspiring.
Alice’s experience with loss began at the young age of 9 when her father passed away after a short but intense battle with esophageal cancer As a child, the grief was difficult to grasp, leaving Alice with a deep sense of unfairness, watching other children go about their lives with both parents, when her father was gone. The loss of her father set the stage for years of grief, with Alice facing the loss of her beloved Nan, multiple aunts, and eventually, her mother in a devastating car accident in 2015
The tragedy of losing her mother in such sudden and catastrophic circumstances – in a head-on collision just after her aunt's funeral – left Alice physically and emotionally shattered
Pictured:
Top Left: A childhood photo of Alice with her brother and father
Top Right: Alice, her mother and brother
Middle: The wreckage from the tragic car crash that took her mother’s life and left Alice and her brother fighting to survive
Bottom: Alice’s injuries from the crash
The accident left Alice with severe spinal injuries, and her brother was in a coma for three days In an instant, her world changed, and she found herself navigating a new reality, without the people who had once been her greatest support.
However, what might have broken many instead became the foundation of Alice’s resolve She was determined not to let grief consume her After years of recovery – both physical and emotional – Alice began to see her grief as a part of her, but not the defining aspect of her existence.
Alice had long dreamed of competing in pageantry Before her mother’s passing, she had participated in a regional Miss England competition and loved it. But after the tragic events that reshaped her life, pageants took a back seat. However, in 2023, after years of rebuilding and self-reflection, Alice felt the time had come to re-enter the world she had once adored She set her sights on Miss England, a journey that would ultimately lead her to becoming Miss London 2024
Her pageant journey was more than just about titles or glitz and glam – it was about reclaiming her identity, rediscovering who Alice was outside of her grief, and proving to herself that she was capable of so much more than she ever thought possible Throughout the Miss England experience, Alice had “incredible experiences,” including runway shows, photo shoots, and meeting remarkable women who became lifelong friends. She placed in the top 12 at the national final and felt the “pageant bug” take hold
But the story didn’t end there Alice was approached by Kirsty, the regional director for Miss London, who invited her to compete in a Miss Great Britain regional heat. Alice took this opportunity and emerged victorious, securing the Miss London 2024 title. For Alice, pageantry became a symbol of perseverance, a testament to her ability to overcome adversity, and a way to bring positive change to the world
What truly sets Alice apart, however, is her work as an advocate for better bereavement policies Drawing on her own painful experiences with grief and loss, she began to speak out against the lack of legal protections for people coping with the death of a loved one. Through her Instagram series, Living with Loss, and her new Platform, Beyond the Storm, Alice created safe spaces where people could share their grief stories, finding comfort in knowing they were not alone.
The success of the series, which has reached over 30,000 views and featured 23 episodes, led Alice to start advocating for change in the workplace She was shocked to learn that, unlike other countries such as Canada and France, the UK has no legal right to bereavement leave unless a parent loses a child under 18. This gap in the law inspired Alice to launch a petition asking the UK government to introduce paid bereavement leave, a cause she’s passionate about due to the deep impact it had on her own recovery process
Alice is also working with Let's Talk About Loss, a charity offering support for young people dealing with grief, where she hosts regular meetups in Southampton She is not only making an impact online but also in her community, offering resources and tangible support for others navigating similar journeys.
For Alice, grief is not a topic to shy away from. She’s learned that talking about loss, especially with others who have experienced something similar, can be healing Through Living with Loss, and her latest platform, Beyond the Storm, Alice has provided a platform for others to share their stories, bringing attention to the fact that people need support long after the funeral. The conversations have not only helped those who have joined her live sessions but have also provided an invaluable resource for others who have watched the recordings in their own time
What Alice has learned through these experiences is profound. Grief doesn’t define who you are, but it’s a part of you that shapes your future. In her case, that future is one of compassion, resilience, and advocacy. By sharing her grief journey publicly, Alice has created a bridge for others to cross, from the isolation of sorrow to a community of support, healing, and empowerment
As Alice continues to grow personally and professionally, she remains focused on her advocacy work and plans for the future Her platform as Miss London 2024 will allow her to bring further attention to the cause she’s so passionate about – ensuring that people going through loss can take time off work to grieve without financial hardship
But beyond the pageant, the legal advocacy, and her emotional healing, Alice Cutler is a living testament to the strength of the human spirit. Her journey has shown that, even after the most unimaginable pain, it is possible to not only rebuild your life but to thrive Alice’s story is one of transformation, showing the world that from the ashes of grief, new purpose, passion, and advocacy can rise. And as she continues to flourish, Alice proves that the power to rebuild, reclaim, and make a lasting impact is within all of us, no matter the obstacles we face
ALICE GRADUATED FROM THE UNIVERSITY OF SOUTHAMPTON, ENGLAND WITH A LAW DEGREE IN 2019 BEFORE GOING ON TO TRAIN AT ONE OF THE TOP 5 LAW FIRMS IN THE UK IN LONDON - STILL ONE OF HER PROUDEST ACHIEVEMENTS TO DATE. SHE CURRENTLY LIVES IN SOUTHAMPTON WITH HER PARTNER HARRY AND 2 YEAR OLD LABRADOR OTIS AND WORKS IN REAL ESTATE DEVELOPMENT ACTING FOR PROPERTY DEVELOPERS ACROSS THE UK.
TO LEARN MORE ABOUT ALICE, HER ADVOCACY WORK, AND HER INSPIRING LIVE INTERVIEW SERIES LIVING WITH LOSS, AS WELL AS HER NEW PLATFORM BEYOND THE STORM, FOLLOW HER ON INSTAGRAM AT @ALICEECUTLER @BEYONDTHESTORM PLATFORM.
Unbreakable Bond:
After losing their 10-month-old daughter Evangeline, Griscelle and her husband turned their unimaginable grief into something beautiful: Princess and Papa, a heartfelt fatherdaughterclothinglinecreatedin her memory. What began as a tribute to their baby girl has become a celebration of love, connection, and the moments thatmattermost.
Princess and Papa is more than just a matchingfather-daughterclothingline it’sa love story. A brand born from the deepest heartbreak, transformed into a joyful, heartfelt celebration of family, connection, and the little moments that matter most. Founded by GriscelleAnackerandherhusbandinhonorof their daughter Evangeline, every piece in the collection is a tribute to a beautiful life that continuestoshine.
“Evangeline was our first baby girl and she was pure light,” Griscelle shares. “She had this sparkabouther feisty,joyful,alwaysbringing smiles to everyone around her” Her laughter, hertinypincergrasp,andherloveforcarrides everydetailofhershortbutradiantlifelefta mark
OnDecember8,2022,Evangelinepassedaway unexpectedly in her sleep, just 10 months old What followed was a season of unimaginable grief. “It felt like the world kept turning while ours stood completely still,” Griscelle remembers. But through the darkness, a new kind of love emerged one that inspired a brand rooted in remembrance, joy, and intentionalliving.
“I’vealwayslovedfashion,”shesays “Evenasa kid, I used to walk through the mall thinking I’d get discovered and end up on Top Model! But when I found out I was having a girl, I went all in Icouldn’twaittodressher Sharingthatlove of style with her was something I was so excitedabout.”
ThatpassionpouredintoPrincessandPapa a collection that now tells stories through clothing “Fashion became more than just clothes itbecameawaytohonorher.Tofeel closetoher.Tocreatesomethingbeautifulout ofheartbreak”
Each design blends playful, hand-drawn elements like footballs or bold colors with softer, feminine details “It’s like inviting dads into their daughters’ world,” Griscelle explains. “A little bow here, a heart there it’s those intentionaltouchesthatmakeitspecial”
But the brand’s purpose runs deep style “My biggest hope for Princess a has always been to honor Evangelin alsotocreatesomethingbiggerthan want to help people slow down, be andreallycherishthepeopletheylove
From holiday collections to everyday brand captures what matters mo connection, and memory-making. futureisbright Griscellehopestoexp line to include siblings, moms, and ev “Dressing in matching outfits might so to some, but to me, it’s about families back and instantly remembering tha thewaytheylovedeachother.”
Creating Princess and Papa has been for Griscelle. “It gave me purpos everything felt like it was falling apart clothes can help one family hold each littlecloser,thenIknowEvangeline’slig shining.”
And shining it is — in every bow, every print, everyhugstitchedintotheseams.
HowtheMendingWord’s
MichalSchmalbergturnedgriefinto acommunitywritingexperience
Finding the words
WhenMichallosthermothertobreastcanceronMarch9,2020 thesamenighther community was hit by the first wave of COVID-19 the world as she knew it collapsed. The timing was painfully ironic: it was the Jewish holiday of Purim, a day typicallyfilledwithjoy.HerfathercontractedCOVID-19shortlyafterandspentnearly four months on a ventilator. When he returned, he was not the same. He passed awayjustbeforeMichalwassettolaunchwhatwouldbecomeTheMendingWord acommunitybornfromheartbreakandadeeplongingtonotgrievealone.
Whatstartedasapersonalcopingmechanism writingthroughpain,poetrystored in the notes app, vulnerable Facebook posts shared during a time of global loss transformed into something far greater. Michal's raw honesty struck a chord with others navigating their own grief. Encouraged by responses from strangers and friendsalike,sherealizedthatgrief,whenvoiced,createsconnection.
In 2021, she created a blog called grievingmoments and launched a small Instagram account with just 80 followers But Michal was searching for something more: a writing group that combined creative expression with live, communal support When noneexisted,shedecidedtobuilditherself She put out a call on Instagram asking if anyone wanted to join a grief writing group That question has since grown into The Mending Word, a vibrant network of writing workshops supporting people all over the world through parent, child, sibling, and partner loss and evensuicideloss
Pictured:Michalandherparents
“For me, writing is how I breathe through grief,” Michal says. “It helped me connect to pain that felt otherwise unreachable. And when I shared my words, it gave othersthelanguagefortheirownsorrow.”
Her participants aren’t just names on a screen. Michal holds space for them for their memories, their rawness, and the beautiful, bittersweet stories of those they've lost. Through her workshops, people rediscover the healing power of words,andoften,themselves.
The work has been both an offering and a mirror. “There was the Michal before grief, and the Michal during grief,” she reflects. “Now, I’m constantly learning how to connectthosetwoversionsofmyself.”
Through The Mending Word, Michal has also created The Mending Circle, a space for continued connection across cohorts. Some participants have become close friends;others,griefconfidantes.Andevery story shared becomes part of a collective honoringofloveandloss.
Her advice to anyone mourning? “Let your griefspeak.Findasafeplacetoletitout whether through writing, conversation, or shared silence. You don’t have to do this alone. There are people who want to hold yourgriefwithyou.”
Grief,forMichal,isnolongerjustsorrow.It’s a space of transformation, of love remembered,andofcommunitybuiltfrom whatremains.
To learn more about The Mending Word and Michal’s offerings, please visit www.themendingword.com andfollowheronInstagram @themendingword
Picturedabove:Michalpreparingforan in-personMendingWordevent
Oneofthemostpowerfulaspectsof
The Mending Word is the way it invites someone to share their grief
— not just silently, but out loud, on the page, and in community. What follows is an excerpt from a participant who found healing through Michal’s workshops. Their words offer a glimpse into a heart learning to live with loss. Like grief itself, the writing is tender, raw, honest, and full of love. In telling theirstory,theyhelpothersfeelless aloneintheirs.
AGuide,AReminder
Youneedtotakemorepictures
Youcarrythatdeviceeverywhere
Andforwhat
Getherinfrontofthecamera
Becauseonedayyou’llrunout
One day you’ll collect all the momentsshewascaptured
There’ll be no more images to discover
Andthenshe’llreallybegone
Youneedtocalmdown
Youwillgrievehard
Butyoudon’tneedtoruinChristmas withallyourscreaming
Otherswillgrievedifferentlythanyou
Youneedtoletthem
Youneedtostandupforyourself
Nooneelsewill
Ortheywon’tknowhow
Notlikeyoucan
People will tell you to get out of your griefbubblewhenyou’renotready
Standyourground
Youdon’tneedtoproveyourself
Youcantakemoretimeoffwork
Itwon’tmakeyouafailure
Youdon’tneedtolie
Tellthemwhenyourheartcan’ttakeit
Tellthemyoujustdon’tfuckingwanttogo
You’re too busy wrapping your arms around your bodysoyou’reinsidesdon’tfallout
You’re too busy taking hot baths to slow down yourheartbeat
Yourheartwillkeepbreaking
Assomewhoyouhopedtoclingtowilldisappoint you
Your heart will be a cistern for all the tears you’re tooafraidtoletfall
Letthemfall
Braceyourself
Every drop that hits the floor will turn into a tidal wave
Butlooktoyourleft
Yourhusband–yourheart
Looktoyourright
Yourbrother,yourfather–yourhome Lookbehindyou
Yourcousinsandclosestfriends–yourspirit
Lookinfrontofyou
Yourgrandmothers,yourtias
Theywillguideyoufromthisdayforward
Thesearetheone
-Andrina Pugh, past,fromthepr
In today’s western society, grief is often a taboo topic. Consequently, people feel compelled to grieve behind closed doors, often expressing a sense of loneliness and isolation. Why do they feel this way, and was grief always such a solitary experience?
Nalda Siedman of The Grief Hub turns to the Get Griefy Small Business Collective for insight into how grief, mourning, and loss practices have evolved over time. She interviews Dr. Kimberly Rich, a grief educator and death doula; Elreacy Dock, a thanatologist and grief and death educator; and Michaelene Dowers, owner of Pollen Care and an expert in grief and thanatology.
A Collaborative Piece brought to you by The Grief Hub and SBC experts Dr. Elreacy Dock, Michaelene Dowers, and Dr. Kimberly Rich
You don’t have to grieve alone and you don’t have to stay stuck.
Whether you ’ re navigating grief, a life transition, or seeking to reconnect with your inner light, Amanda McKoy Flanagan will walk beside you through loss, transformation, and healing, offering sacred space, soul guidance, and fierce compassion in 1:1 private coaching sessions, workshops, and retreats.
Grief is not the end. It's the invitation.
Say yes to healing Say yes to you!
amandamckoyflanagan.com
IG: @amandamckoyflanagan
Bassem Moussa Photography
With raw honesty and a deep sense of compassion, author Bethel Stevens steps into the often unspoken terrain of grief in her newly released book, Not a Cinderella Story Far from a fairytale, Stevens’ narrative offers something far more essential a roadmap for anyone navigating profound loss It’s not filled with platitudes or prescribed steps Instead, it’s grounded in lived experience, scientific insight, and emotional depth Above all, it’s a book about love the kind that remains even after goodbye
“I wrote the book I needed 35 years ago, ” Stevens says. “I was desperate for someone to be as vulnerable and transparent as I’ve been in this book I didn’t need a five-step guide to grief I needed someone to walk through the dark with me ”
The darkness she speaks of is the grief that followed the death of her husband a journey that began long before his passing Stevens met him in her late 20s, and for more than five years, she stood beside him as he faced a degenerative illness that slowly took his strength and mobility They endured private losses together: the inability to have children, the steady decline in his health, and the growing awareness that so many hopes and dreams would never be realized But they didn’t talk about the end
“It was too hard, and we were too young, ” she says quietly “I think I grieved in pieces along the way all the things w never got to experience But the full gri the wave of it, didn’t hit until he w gone ”
What followed was disorienting In Not Cinderella Story, Stevens describes t early days of grief not just emotional but physically and cognitively “We oft talk about the emotional side of grief, b there’s more to it,” she explains “I ta about what actually happens in the brain when you lose someone the memory loss, the sleep disturbances, the fog”
At the time, she didn’t understand it She just knew that everything felt difficult like she was underwater It was only later, as she began to research and process, that she realized the science behind her experience.
“When I learned that my brain was reacting to loss in a very real, biological way that it was trying to locate someone it expected to see I felt such relief I wasn’t broken I wasn’t crazy The people who told me to ' move on ' were the ones missing something What we need is empathy, not timelines”
That shift in perspective became central to her healing Today, Stevens lives what she calls an “integrated life,” one where grief and joy coexist She doesn’t try to erase the pain or silence the memories Instead, she honors them as evidence of something enduring
“Some memories are sad, and some are sweet I don’t force myself to smile through them I allow them to be what they are That’s how I know our love was real Grief is the proof”
She recalls a quote that became a guiding truth for her: “Love never dies, only people do” Her husband may be gone, but the love they shared still informs how she lives and writes today In fact, the book is as much about him as it is about her
BethelStevensistheauthorofthenewly released book Not a Cinderella Story A powerful story of love, loss, and perseverancewhenlifegoesoffscript. Asanauthor,speaker,andmentalhealth advocate, Bethel shares her deeply personal journey as a young widow navigating grief and rebuilding her life. Her work empowers others to reimagine their futures with hope, purpose, and strength. Bethel incorporates insights frombereavementsciencetoshedlighton thecognitiveandemotionalcomplexities of grief. A first-generation EthiopianAmerican,sheispassionateabout helping others and creating authentic spaces for connection, healing, and community.
*Aportionofproceedsfromherbookwill be donated to the Pheo-Para Alliance, to support critical cancer research and awareness efforts of pheochromocytoma, the rare disease that her husband courageouslybattled.
Website:reimaginedjourneys.com Socialmedia:@bethel stevens
“I honor him by sharing his story his courage, his faith, the way he faced each day with strength He was an amazing person It’s not just my grief I’m writing about, it’s his legacy”
Writing Not a Cinderella Story was anything but easy It meant reliving trauma, asking herself difficult questions, and confronting fears she had tucked away. For a long time, she didn’t know how to end it But that, too, became part of the message
“I realized it doesn’t end Life keeps going It evolves What matters most is how we choose to move through it My posture now is one of hope and gratitude”
Her hope is that the book offers more than understanding that it helps people feel less alone “Grief can feel like being lost in the dark I used to picture myself alone in an empty theater But now, I imagine someone turning on the lights and seeing that the room is full People are just quietly surviving next to you ”
That image has become a powerful reminder of why she chose to share her story so openly With Not a Cinderella Story, Bethel Stevens has offered a beacon for those sitting in the dark a way to find light, love, and connection even in the midst of sorrow
Because while life may never be the same, as Stevens says, “It can still be meaningful It can still be beautiful And love love always remains”
GRI SHI THR WIT
IN A RAW AND POWERFUL CONVERSATION, GET GRIEFY SITS DOWN WITH ESPN ANALYST, SPEAKER AND AUTHOR LAUREN SISLER TO UNCOVER THE HEARTBREAK BEHIND THE HEADLINES—PROVING THAT EVEN IN THE SPOTLIGHT, GRIEF DOESN’T TAKE A BACKSEAT.
Spring’s arrival, with its blooming flowers and returning greenery, serves as a poignant reminder for Lauren Sisler it marks the 22nd anniversary of the worst day of her life.
While Lauren is best known for her signature "Sideline Shimmy" and as an Emmy Award-winning sports broadcaster for ESPN, she is much more than a media personality She is a woman embracing her own journey, using her story as a bridge to connection and hope
In the early days of her collegiate athletic career as a gymnast at Rutgers University, Lauren received a late-night phone call that would forever alter her life
Her father, Butch Sisler, delivered devastating news: her mother, Lesley Sisler, had unexpectedly passed away in their home. Heartbroken and frantic, Lauren rushed to pack her bags, hoping to find comfort in her father’s embrace
But when she arrived at the airport and realized her dad wasn’t there to pick her up, a deeper dread settled in That night in March 2003, Lauren faced an even more shattering truth both of her parents had died that night, learning later in her journey, from a prescription drug overdose involving fentanyl
Based on Interview with Kera Sanchez, Get Griefy Magazine’s Editor-in-Chief
Since then, Lauren has navigated a winding road of grief, uncovering the hidden struggles her parents faced. Addiction, secrets, and silent suffering had existed in plain sight during her childhood and adolescence all while Lauren and her brother, Allen, were shielded from the full weight of their parents' reality.
Despite the pain, Lauren has chosen to embrace her journey not only as a journalist who tells the stories of others but as someone who has learned to fall in love with her own story.
In a conversation with Get Griefy’s Ed in-Chief, Kera Sanchez, Lauren refle on her grief journey, discussing process of writing her book, the weig subsequent loss, unexpected lessons how motherhood has reshaped understanding of what it means t shatterproof. Between appointments with her toddler in tow, she squeez time for the conversation a testame the many plates she is currently jugg As an ESPN reporter, full-time mom wife, Lauren also strives to share her journey and break the stigma surroun loss. Having already lost her parents most recently, her brother Allen, she faces the profound challenge navigating life and grief without surviving family members of origin
When we asked about reliving her while writing her book, Lauren s candidly about uncovering long-hi truths: “There were so many black h unanswered questions What led u this? How did we get here? We we blind to the addiction and suffering was happening behind closed doors. were we so naive to not know that were drowning in addiction, ultim leading to their deaths?”
Writing the book was a struggle, Lauren credits Holland Web for he her piece together the fragme narrative. His guidance was cruci framing the story in a meaningful pushing her to dig deeper into journey
“I think if I had tried to write this book just two years after it happened, the narrative would have been very different,” Lauren reflects “The book shows the growth, maturity, and understanding that comes with years of grief—and healing”
Even now, Lauren is still processing the loss of her only sibling, Allen. “I’m still working through it,” she admits “Thankfully, my therapist and others have reminded me that I don’t have to force myself to share something I’m still processing. The truth will set you free but I’m still living through this grief with my brother.”
In the messy middle of it all, Lauren finds clarity especially in embracing grief as a shared human experience. When asked how her losses have affected the way she mothers her son, Mason, Lauren shared her thoughts on love, imperfection, and grace: “I want him to know every part of his grandparents, the good and the bad I want him to recognize that we are human, that we make mistakes, and that’s okay. I’m not perfect, and neither were they. But they loved me unconditionally, and they did the best they could. I’ll fall short too, but showing grace to him and asking for grace as his mom is a way to teach him to have grace for himself in life”
Storytelling has become an essential part of Lauren’s healing journey. As a professional storyteller, she recognizes the transformative power of sharing one ’ s story not just to connect with others but to give them the permission to step into their own narrative “
It's so freeing, and I so badly wanted that for my brother, to be able to step into his story and own it. And I think that was one thing I always prayed for him, and I don't think he ever got there But I experienced such healing this way ” she says Lauren goes on to explain, “I use the word exoneration because I feel like we ' re imprisoned by our shame and our guilt and our regrets and the mistakes and all the things. And I feel like when we can just own them and just put it out there and be like, "Hey, this is not going to define me Ultimately, this is going to refine me " Boom, baby Those shackles of shame are off and I’ve felt such freedom from it.”
Lauren also finds inspiration in recovery communities, where those who begin by seeking help find deeper healing when they start mentoring others She believes that everyone carries burdens and struggles and that when we begin to speak and share them, we break free. “You will experience a freedom you never thought possible,” she says.
For Lauren, this sense of freedom is embodied in her signature "sideline shimmy" What began as a way to calm her nerves before going on air has evolved into a symbol of joy, resilience, and personal growth. “My goal is to help people find their sideline shimmy where they can find joy despite the setbacks and disappointments That’s when we recognize that we can all become shatterproof”
In wrapping up the conversation, Lauren shared her perspective on grief: “Grief is a gift. It’s an emotion that shows the depth of our love for someone we ’ ve lost. The weight of that grief is a reminder of a love deeper and more meaningful than any other”
LOVE THAT IS IN FACT, SHATTERPROOF.
LAUREN SISLER CURRENTLY RESIDES IN BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA, WITH HER HUSBAND JOHN, THEIR SON MASON, AND THEIR YELLOW LAB, MAGNOLIA. SHE CONTINUES TO SHARE HER STORY THROUGH HER WORK ON ESPN, AS WELL AS VARIOUS MOTIVATIONAL SPEAKING ENGAGEMENTS. HER BOOK, SHATTERPROOF, RELEASED IN LATE 2024, IS A TESTAMENT TO HER JOURNEY OF UNCOVERING TRUTH, EMBRACING LOVE, AND FALLING IN LOVE WITH HER OWN STORY. YOU CAN FIND THE BOOK, AND LEARN MORE ABOUT LAUREN AT WWW.LAURENSISLER.COM.
—SomeholdspaceforGrief
Grief is a journey no one chooses, yet it finds us all at some point For Tom Bender, host of the Heroes in Grief podcast, loss has been a defining part of his life. His experiences as a bereaved father, son, brother, and friend, combined with his background in ministry, hospice care, and emergency medical services, have shaped his mission to help others navigate their grief. Through his podcast, Tom amplifies stories of resilience, creating a space where people can find solace, resources, and inspiration
A Life Reshaped by Grief
Tom’s personal grief journey reached a pivotal moment with the loss of his son, Jeff, on February 23, 2023 The devastation of that loss was profound “I was in utter shock and pretty much like a zombie for the first three weeks,” he recalls. Acknowledging his need for support, Tom sought out resources, immersing himself in online grief communities like David Kessler’s Tender Hearts group He found comfort in guided meditations and grief-focused platforms such as We Don’t Die Radio and Helping Parents Heal.
These connections became a lifeline, showing him that while grief is deeply personal, it is also a shared human experience Listening to others' stories helped him feel less alone, a realization that ultimately led him to create Heroes in Grief.
Meet Tom Bender of the Heroes in Grief Podcast
As Tom engaged with others in grief, he noticed a pattern: many were channeling their pain into meaningful projects memorials, advocacy, and support systems for others Inspired by their resilience, he felt compelled to share these stories “It didn’t matter the circumstances of why they were grieving. I felt it was very important to get their stories out and make people aware of the amazing things that were being done in honor of lost loved ones ”
The podcast became a platform for these narratives, highlighting both the pain and the purpose that can emerge from loss. While some episodes explore specific themes, such as pet grief, much of the content arises organically One recurring focus is acute grief ensuring that those newly bereaved feel seen and supported
A Podcast That Offers Comfort and Connection
Tom believes that one of the greatest gifts of the podcast is its ability to help people feel less alone “I think it is always helpful to hear others' stories,” he says “And I’ve been amazed at the vast array of ways people have turned their grief into purpose.”
The idea was planted
Beyond storytelling, the podcast introduces listeners to a wealth of grief resources. Tom hopes that by sharing different paths to healing, he can help each listener find something that resonates His work reinforces the idea that grief is unique to each individual, but that shared experiences can offer profound comfort.
Lessons from Grief
Through his podcast, Tom has deepened his understanding of grief’s complexity “Grief is individual, complex, and universal,” he says “Each person’s grief is their own, but the comfort that can be received or shared with others is real.” He is particularly fascinated by the psychological nuances of grief how it affects the mind and shapes emotions over time
Despite his forward-thinking nature, Tom approaches the podcast’s future with an open heart, trusting that it will evolve as it is meant to. “I feel I was led to do this,” he shares While the podcast's audience is still growing, the heartfelt messages he receives confirm its impact He is optimistic about expanding its reach, particularly through collaborations with figures like Sandra Champlain, whose work in the grief space has a global presence
A Father’s Legacy
When asked what his son Jeff would think of the podcast, Tom responds with confidence “Jeff would say, ‘That’s awesome, Dad!’” Throughout Jeff’s life, Tom was always in leadership roles whether as a pastor, a musician, or an entertainer. Though never explicitly stated, he believes Jeff was proud of him Now, through Heroes in Grief, Tom continues to make his son proud by turning his loss into a source of healing for others
Grief is a journey, but no one has to walk it alone. Thanks to Tom Bender and Heroes in Grief, countless people are finding companionship, understanding, and hope in the midst of their loss
Tom Bender is a certified Grief Educator, grief advocate, and loss mentor based in Upstate New York. In honor of his son Jeff, Tom is dedicated to helping others navigate grief with compassion and understanding. As a speaker and podcast host, he creates a supportive space for healing and connection. To work with Tom or explore his podcast, visit him on Instagram @heroesingrief or find his podcast on most streaming platforms.
FOUR SEASONS OF GRIEF
By:SundariMalcolmandTheGetGriefySBC
With Spring finally here, the days growing longer and the Sun making her grand appearance, I’ve been thinking about how much Grief and the changing Seasons mirror each other And how closely our experience of loss becomes intertwined with the changing landscape of Mother Nature
This Winter was intense January felt like it lasted 700 days I blinked twice and February was over And March felt like it was playing the game, “How much of the color grey can you handle before you lose it completely?”
Spring often feels like a gift from above after all of that! The birds are singing, the flowers are showing off, and people are finally smiling at each other again The days feel lighter and suddenly you feel motivated to spend some time outside and get back into the swing of things
Spring is also the most unpredictable season Will it be raining all day or just every morning? Do you need a fan at night or do you need to pull that heavy blanket out again? Exactly how many times will one sneeze while trying to take a simple stroll?
This daily yoyo of one’s comfort, and sinuses, makes me think about what the Spring of Grief feels like for so many of us. It’s that season when you crawl out of your darkness, thinking you have things handled, and all of a sudden your eyes are raining in the Cereal aisle because your local grocery store is playing a song that reminds you of your person
It’s when someone gives you that random hug and all of a sudden you’re both a walking ray of sunshine, and a little disoriented, because you haven’t been around humans in a while and you’ve forgotten how great being in community could actually feel
Spring, both literally and figuratively, always underscores a need for preparedness Yes, there will be days that will feel glorious but please never ever forget your umbrella or your box of tissues.
Niki DiGaetano, a death doula of Numbered Days, spoke with me about Autumn recently, and I wanted to share her thoughts:
“Autumn marks a changing, closing the sunny chapter ofsummerandusheringinthecoldofwinter Aseason of change and transition, Autumn invites us to sit and bestillamongthein-between’s
We are neither here nor there, neither in Summer nor in Winter…we are in the “ messy middle.” Grief has oftenaskedthatIbepresentformyownseasonsofinbetween,andthisiswhatIhaveinvitedmygriefclients to do as well: to sit and be in-presence-with, instead of running towards or away. After all, Autumn isn’t on a timeline,andneitherisgrief.
The inspiration that can be drawn from the natural worldisrichwithprofoundwisdomforliving–andfor grieving – if we pay attention to nature’s dialogue. “Slow down,” the ancient rock whispers. “Breathe deep,” murmurs the rushing river. “Climb the mountain.Enjoythejourney.AndjustBe.”
When I spoke about all of this with Andrea Turnbow, of The Grief Nook, she had this to say about our coldest months:
“The season I’ve been learning to navigate lately is Winter I’ve always loved the cooldown, pulling out the sweaters and scarves, drinking hot cocoa, and eating entirelytoomuch Butwiththecozinessalso comes added responsibilities, more social obligations, a full schedule, and commercializedholidaymadness.
What has really helped me in my grief during this whirlwind season is twofold; carvingouttimeformyselfduringthehustle and bustle of the season to help keep me sane (which works most of the time), as well as planning ahead for the quietness after the holidayswhenstillnesssettlesin.
The stillness takes us by surprise. All at once, everything is over. Now what? Just sit here alone with my thoughts? Don’t let the stillness surprise you. During winter’s downtime, your grief will demand attention.”
And as always, Summer will eventually arrive. Summer, with its bike rides and beaches BBQ’s, gentle breezes at dusk and laughter heard from miles away
Summer is the season where hobbies are reignited, long forgotten books are read and time seems to slow allll the way down And on the other side, when August begins to draw to a close, we find ourselves transformed in a way Softer, quieter and more grounded In this way, Summer delivers us anew
There are times, in our Grief journey, when the stillness returns but this time with a different intention Unlike Winter, when it’s demanding we pay attention to our loss, the Summer of Grief reminds us that we are more than what has happened to us It shows us just how far we’ve come and how much we’ve changed. And then with its hot sticky hand, it invites us to shift. To step into a new version of ourselves and allow a new path to unfold.
And so I ask you dear reader, what Season of Grief do you find yourself in today? Are you in the messy in- between of Autumn or the stillness of Winter? Are you wading through the unpredictability of Spring or are you moving through your Summer portal of transformation?
Wherever you may be, I hope you invite grace in to walk beside you Yes Grief is tricky and so are its seasons but you, just like Mother Nature, are both powerful and infinitely capable Be gentle with yourself
SundariMalcolmhasmadeithermissiontoequippeoplewiththetoolstheyneedtomanagelife’sgreatesttransitions. SundariisthefounderofAHealingDoulaAcademy SheisaBirth,GriefandDeathDoula SheisaYogaand MeditationteacherandanAuthorofthebookGriefGems @sundaribliss ahealingdoulacom
TolearnmoreaboutNikifromNumberedDaysandAndreafromtheGriefNook,CheckthemoutonInstagram @numbereddaysdoula@thegriefnook
STEPHANIE SARAZIN AND THE POWER OF NAMING AMBIGUOUS GRIEF
Stephanie Sarazin’s life changed on an ordinary Tuesday morning — the kind you don’t expect to split your world in two. A sudden discovery unveiled a secret that would not just upend her sense of reality, but send her spiraling into a kind of grief she’d never known and couldn’t name. No one had died. And yet, she was grieving. That grief raw, consuming, but invisible to most would set her on a path of discovery, healing, and eventually authorship.
Her groundbreaking book, Soulbroken, explores what she now knows intimately: ambiguous grief the loss of someone still living, but irreversibly changed.
We sat down with Stephanie Sarazin and Get Griefy founder Kera Sanchez to dive deeper into this often-misunderstood form of mourning, the importance of naming pain, and how we can better support those grieving losses that don’t neatly fit into society’s grief script.
INTERVIEW WITH GET GRIEFY’S KERA SANCHEZ
Get Griefy:
Stephanie, can you tell us a bit about your personal journey with ambiguous grief?
Stephanie:
Like so many of us, my loss happened suddenly I loved my marriage of 18 years, and discovering betrayal on that Tuesday morning changed We divorced shortly over the next year, I ealize I was grieving dn’t feel like the grief k about It wasn’t was still here But the p had died And new how to talk t kind of loss I ind anyone who d what I was going
to feel better, I maybe if I could d what made my ent, I could start to at led me to gly begin my work in pace first through and eventually with ch and writing that ulbroken e unfamiliar, how d you define ambiguous or loss?
anie:
guous grief is the ence of grieving a loved who is still alive, but who’s nger in your life the same or at all.
It might come through betrayal, estrangement, addiction, illness, incarceration, identity changes the “activating event” varies, but the feeling is the same: you’re grieving someone still living and society doesn’t recognize that grief the way we do when someone dies
Through my early research, I defined it as: “the feelings experienced from the loss of a loved one who is still living, accompanied by a change or death of the relationship”
Get Griefy:
Why is it so powerful to be able to name this grief?
Stephanie:
Naming and understanding my ambiguous grief helped me feel better It’s like someone handed me a map after I’d been wandering alone in a dark forest And I found I wasn’t the only one when I wrote essays online, I got flooded with messages from people saying, “I didn’t know this was grief until I read this now I finally understand what’s happening to me”
When people don’t have a name for their grief, it can add confusion to an already difficult situation If they internalize feelings of shame or embarrassment, they tend to isolate and grieve alone I did too I didn’t tell anyone outside of my therapist and one friend for three whole months That would never be the case if someone had died
I think naming it gives people some clarity, and even permission to grieve and that’s a powerful first step toward healing
Get Griefy:
These help you process the loss, feel witnessed, and receive support Ambiguous grief doesn’t have that
What inspired you to write Soulbroken?
Stephanie:
I wrote it because I felt alone in my grief, and I wanted to help others feel less alone in theirs When I started hearing from others people who were also grieving people still living I knew I had to go deeper I launched surveys, collected stories, read everything I could That research helped me see that what makes ambiguous grief different comes down to two major things:
A lack of societal norms With traditional grief, there are rituals obituaries, funerals, sympathy cards
Hope When someone dies, we don’t expect them to come back But in ambiguous grief, hope lingers often painfully
Get Griefy:
How has your understanding of grief evolved through all this?
Stephanie:
I used to think grief was something that came after death, and that it had neat little “stages”
Now I know that grief is more about the depth of your attachment than the circumstances of your loss
Dr Mary-Frances O’Connor’s work helped me see how our grief responses are tied to attachment theory
Whether your person is living or gone, the strength of that attachment bond determines how deeply we grieve That’s helped me be more compassionate not just to myself, but to others Everyone grieves differently That doesn’t make their grief any less valid
Get Griefy:
Let’s talk about hope You write that hope can be complicated in ambiguous grief Can you unpack that?
Stephanie:
Yes Hope plays both sides And that’s why I call it a “double agent” It can lift you, or it can keep you stuck
When we’re grieving someone who’s still alive, we often cling to what I call external hope hope for them: that they’ll come back, apologize, get sober, be cured
Con’t: That the relationship will return to what it once was
But we don’t talk enough about internal hope hope for ourselves That we can survive That we can accept things as they are, even if they’ll never be what we wanted Internal hope is what helps us integrate our grief and reclaim our lives It's not giving up It’s choosing ourselves
Get Griefy:
Disenfranchised gri in this space wh like for ambiguous g
Stephanie: It’s the added pain o invalidated People alive,” or “At least yo That doesn’t help Th
Disenfranchised gr losses society miscarriages, job lo chronic illness, bre The lack of acknow the grief harder to c
But it doesn’t have t recognizing someon “I see you” c difference
Get Griefy: If someone reads y themselves in your want them to know
Stephanie: That they aren’t alon real, their grief is va sorry for their pain W start talking abou help someone else f
Get Griefy:
Anything you’re working on now that readers can take part in?
Stephanie: Yes! I’m working on two new research projects: One is a deeper dive into hope in ambiguous grief The other is focused on rituals for loss, grief, and healing
They’re both short, anonymous surveys I’d love for anyone reading this to contribute It’s a way to turn pain into purpose and every voice matters
Grief isn’t always about death. Sometimes, it’s about absence without closure. A person who’s still here, but no longer with you. A relationship that once defined you, now just a memory. These are the spaces where ambiguous grief lives quiet, raw, and rarely acknowledged.
Stephanie Sarazin’s Soulbroken gives that pain a name and offers a hand to those who feel unseen in their sorrow.
If you’re navigating ambiguous grief or want to support someone who is read her book. Take part in her research. Follow her on social media. Join her newsletter, “Looking Forward.” Most importantly, talk about your grief. You never know who needs to hear it.
BECAUSE YOU AREN’T ALONE. AND YOUR GRIEF MATTERS.
STEPHANIE SARAZIN IS A WRITER, GRIEF EDUCATOR, AND TEDX PRODUCER. SHE’S THE AUTHOR OF SOULBROKEN, A GUIDE TO NAVIGATING AMBIGUOUS GRIEF THE PAIN OF LOSING SOMEONE WHO’S STILL LIVING. HER WORK HELPS OTHERS NAME THEIR LOSS, FEEL LESS ALONE, AND HEAL WITHOUT CLOSURE.
TO LEARN MORE ABOUT STEPHANIE, VISIT HER WEBSITE AT STEPHANIESARAZIN.COM AND FOLLOW HER ON INSTAGRAM @STEPHING THRU
HER BOOK SOULBROKEN IS AVAILABLE WHERE YOU BUY YOUR BOOKS AND IS A 2023 NAUTILUS GOLD BOOK AWARD WINNER FOR GRIEF AND LOSS.
Two Books. One Heart. A Journey Through Grief.
Gabrielle Elise Jimenez hospice nurse, end-of-life doula, and founder of The Hospice Heart has been at the bedside of thousands. But nothing prepared her for the loss of her brother, or the grief she’d buried from losing her parents, sister, son ’ s father, and close friends.
In Healing a Grieving Heart, Gabby shares her personal journey through loss and what it means to truly honor grief. Her latest book, It Never Gets Easier to Say Goodbye, is a moving collection of poems written from years at the bedside as last breaths were being taken, supporting those who were saying goodbye, and from her own personal grief experience as well. These are poems about life, love, death, and grief.
Written from sorrow, strength, and love, these books offer comfort, connection, and a gentle companion for anyone facing grief.
“It’s okay to grieve. It’s okay to still be grieving.”
GABRIELLE ELISE JIMENEZ
A Legacy Journal to leave behind love, advice and support for your loved ones, inspired by all the unsaid after unexpected loss. Includes 55+ unique journal prompts and freestyle space!
A memory/grief journal that prompts quirky and specific memories of our loved ones, insuring their essence is safely kept forever! Includes 55+ unique journal prompts, letters to heaven, sign log and dream log!
When grief knocks the wind out of your sails, it can either break you or it can become the fire that fuels your rise. For Heather Marianna, founder of multiple ventures including her latest success reviving luxury celebrity gifting lounges, grief wasn’t just a personal journey it was the catalyst for entrepreneurial greatness
Heather's story begins with childhood trauma At just seven years old, she was thrust into an unstable back-and-forth between her biological mother and her grandparents Her grandmother, who ultimately raised her, became both a protector and a complex figure in Heather’s life “She instilled in me that I could do anything,” Heather recalls. “But it was also very evident that it wasn’t the life she wanted. I felt like I had to be perfect not to disappoint her.”
That pressure followed Heather into adulthood While attending university in Indiana, her grandmother became ill, and Heather became her power of attorney Juggling school and crosscountry trips to California to care for her grandmother was exhausting but nothing could prepare her for the trauma of her grandmother’s passing “After she died, everything just fell apart,” Heather said “The family who had wanted nothing to do with me suddenly wanted everything to do with the estate It tore me apart ”
It was this grief and the betrayal that followed that pushed Heather to build. “I woke up one day and said, ‘I can’t live like this anymore.’ I turned all that pain into fuel.” She poured herself into her businesses: a staffing agency and a chain of dog accessory boutiques “The busier I stayed, the less I thought about the pain Every time something hurt, I just built more, worked more, and made more money”
Perhaps one of Heather’s most powerful takeaways from her early grief is the importance of self-reliance “You really just have yourself to depend on No one’s coming to save you,” she shared “You have to figure it out and make your own way” This fierce independence kept her companies afloat through one of the most challenging periods of her life
Years later, Heather met Doris Bergman, a fiery red-headed trailblazer who ran celebrity gifting lounges in Hollywood What started as a business interaction Heather paid to sponsor her products quickly evolved into a close mentorship and pseudo mother-daughter relationship
Doris became a fixture in Heather’s life, especially during the COVID-19 pandemic “We would talk all the time She’d send me gifts in the mail; I’d send her some back It was like having family again,” Heather said
But tragedy struck once more Just before one of her major events, Doris died in a house fire alongside her husband and cat. The devastating news came on the same day Heather’s company went public. “It felt like an omen,” she said. “The week leading up to it, she’d been acting erratic. I even offered to come to L.A. to help. She said she was fine.”
Heather struggled with guilt, questioning whether she could have done more But soon after, calls began pouring in from celebrities and media asking her to take over Doris’s gifting lounge empire Despite initial hesitation and an early event plagued by legacy staff Heather stepped up
Heather saw what Doris had built: a beloved but chaotic passion project “She didn’t treat it like a business It was her fun party twice a year,” Heather said Heather infused structure and professionalism into the gifting lounges, making them bigger, better, and revenue-generating while still honoring Doris’s spirit Hence, the birth of Harvest, luxury celebrity gifting lounges
Today, Heather continues to honor Doris’s legacy by using the lounges to lift emerging brands As a beauty brand coach, she often waives fees for small companies, helping them gain exposure they could never afford otherwise “It’s my way of giving back,” Heather says “Doris believed in supporting the little guys and so do I”
Heather Marianna’s journey is a powerful example of resilience in action From abandonment and grief to building multimilliondollar businesses, her story is a reminder that even in our darkest moments, we have the power to create beauty, impact, and legacy
As Heather puts it: “I don’t remember a lot of those hard years. It was like being a robot. But somehow, I got it done. And I know Doris would be proud.”
Grief can be a powerful motivator channel pain into productivity
Self-reliance is essential: no one’s coming to save you
Boundaries matter Know your worth and protect your space
Turn passion into a business model, not just a project Legacy isn’t just about making money it’s about making an impact
From beauty brands to Hollywood gifting lounges, Heather Marianna is proof that resilience isn’t just a buzzword it’s a business strategy
Heather andDolores atthe GLopez Golfevent
IDENTITY AND PURPOSE:
THE SELF UNDONE
For many, grief introduces the disintegration of self Angie Hanson, a certified grief coach, describes this unraveling:
“I lost roles I cherished; wife, mother to my baby boy, sister to someone who always had my back Routines that once grounded me became painful reminders of what was gone I had to ask myself, Who am I now that they’re not here?”
This existential shift often sparks a reordering of priorities Crystal Dalton, certified grief educator and trauma-informed yoga instructor, explains:
“Experiencing loss stripped away the illusion that time is guaranteed I began to prioritize happiness as a necessity, not a luxury My work now centers on honoring both the pain and beauty of being human”
Similarly, Amanda McKoy Flanagan, a loss and empowerment coach, rebuilt her life through radical self-acceptance:
“I transformed my pain into power, and purpose I met my true self in the depths of rawness and despair, and learned to love and accept myself unconditionally”
SAFETY AND PREDICTABILITY: UNSTABLE GROUND
Sometimes secondary losses erode the illusion of control Rose Champagnie, botanist reflects on mortality’s stark reality:
“As I lose my grandparents, one by one, the imaginary wall between myself and death is undermined The inevitable shifts into focus Just like my mommy had to scatter her mommy ’ s ashes, I too will have to utter impossible last words to my mother, and hold her hand for the last time”
Dr Kimberly Rich, death doula, describes anxiety’s pervasive shadow:
“The most prominent secondary loss that I experienced was the loss of safety and predictability A loss of peace, a loss of ease in my body and mind, and a loss of my ability to feel ‘normal’”
Andrea Turnbow, grief educator and trauma and resilience coach, faced judgment during pregnancy after miscarriage:
“After losing my first baby to an early miscarriage, a major secondary loss I experienced was the anxiety and fear that accompanied me during my second pregnancy The fear of the unknown and the possibility of losing my second baby kept me from celebrating my second pregnancy to its fullest”
RELATIONSHIPS AND ENVIRONMENT: FRACTURED CONNECTIONS
Grief has the potential to sever our ties to people and places Sundari Malcolm, birth, grief, and death doula, shares:
“I was raised in NYC, one of the largest cities in the world, and yet after losing my mother, it began to feel like a cul-de-sac I saw and heard and smelled her everywhere I went I moved to Miami not soon after, and I finally felt like I could breathe again”
“Acknowledging that you are what I call the Keeper of the Stories, is significant The weight of that may or may not hit you immediately, but over time, as more memories surface, it might occur to you, ‘There’s no one to check this story with I’m the last one who remembers’”
Nalda Seidman, certified grief educator reflects on a life-altering choice:
“Some people find it hard to understand why I walked away from my profession and refused to return to the life I once had after I lost my son I needed time to fully grieve without any distractions so that one day I could fully live again”
MILESTONES, MEMORIES, AND ABSENCES
For Erin Blechman, certified grief educator and author, secondary losses resurface at milestones marked by her son Max’s absence:
“One of the hardest secondary losses was when our nephew married in 2022 I felt apprehensive and sad about celebrating this milestone without Max He should have been there, standing as a groomsman with his brother and cousins, giving a witty toast”
Susie Stonefield, grief and creativity midwife, grapples with being the last keeper of family history:
Amidst a world lacking grief literacy, Annah Elizabeth, intuitive energy healer, challenges societal comparisons:
“We tend to hierarchize loss, which holds us in conflict Recognizing each loss’s autonomy makes navigating grief manageable”
Grief is a cascade of absences—unfilled roles, unshared milestones, rewritten futures Acknowledging these layers rejects the myth of expiration dates, committing us to bear witness collectively, so no one carries its weight alone In solidarity, we honor these visible and invisible wounds—not to fix, but to affirm their existence
Author: Dr. Elreacy Dock
Contributors:
Angie Hanson, Crystal Dalton, Amanda McKoy Flanagan, Rose Champagnie, Dr Kimberly Rich, Andrea Turnbow, Sundari Malcolm, Nalda Seidman, Erin Blechman, Susie Stonefield, and Annah Elizabeth
Darnell Lamont Walker’s recent Substack poses a compelling question— where are we avoiding being caught dead?
IMAGINE DYING ON SPIRIT AIRLINES...
I’ve made peace with death Really, I have I’ve sat with it, stared it down, and made it clear that I’m not afraid But if it’s coming for me, I have a few stipulations – places I’d rather not be, company I’d rather not keep
I think about my brother sometimes, how he died doing something he had no business doing, with someone he shouldn’t have been with I wonder if, in his last moment, he had just a flash of regret before it all went dark It’s a thought that’s haunted me since the day he left, this reminder that dying isn’t just about leaving; it’s about how you leave and who you leave yourself with.
Like that time I was flying Spirit from Atlanta to Detroit. Somewhere over the Midwest, the turbulence hit hard enough that I tightened my seatbelt, feeling my stomach dip. And I thought, “This can’t be it.” I can’t die on Spirit Airlines, not in these small seats that don’t recline and half-broken tray tables.Not after spending $79 to carry on my wallet. I’d spend eternity with the shame of that last choice. No one should have to stand up at my funeral, look my loved ones in the eyes, and say, “he went down on Spirit.” That’d be a last impression I’d rather not leave.
There was a night in Dallas, when a meteor was supposed to pass close enough to earth to remind us all how small we really are. I was perched at an Applebee’s with a 2-for1 drink, faintly aware of the sizzle of fajitas and the sticky tabletop. And suddenly it hit me – if that meteor decided to veer off-course and take us all out, I couldn’t be found dead at a suburban Applebee’s. Or any Applebee’s. Imagine: my last earthly sounds the hum of “Welcome to the Neighborhood” and the tired chatter of people waiting for half-priced appetizers. I paid my tab and got out of there.
And if it’s going to be in a car accident, please don’t let it be in my Jeep Cherokee Latitude. It’s a reliable car, sure, but it’s not exactly the chariot I want carrying me over to the other side It’s not cute
And if I’m dying in my sleep, let me be beside someone who’d care enough to notice, someone who’d feel me go and hold on as I faded What I couldn’t bear is the idea of going in the night next to someone who’d pretend they weren’t there –who’d slide out of bed as soon as I went cold and leave me there to be found first by the flies, then by their babies, then by the neighbors when the smell becomes unbearable
I want to leave this life in a way that feels like a full stop, not an afterthought I want to feel, even in that last instant, that I was where I belonged
DARNELL LAMONT WALKER IS A DEATH DOULA AND EMMY-NOMINATED WRITER. HIS SUBSTACK EXPLORES DEATH, LIFE, AND THE ABSURD IN
We Asked Our
Instagram Community: What's
the Worst
Place
to Be Caught
Dead?
Here’s What They Said!
“Listen, if I die sitting in any kind if traffic, imma be pissed!”
@themotherlosstherapist
“While out eating in a Restaurant. Facedown in a plate of Bolognese should not be my last look”
@sundaribliss
“Anywhere awake I only want to die asleep in my bed!”
@blairfromblairland
“A Porta Potty has gotta be up there!”
@lemonstolegacies
“A Carousel or any type of theme park ride.”
@elreacydock
From Law to Laughter: The Seeds of a Career
Wendy Litner’s professional path was not always destined for the screen. After completing law school, she embarked on a career as a lawyer However, her love for storytelling and creativity ultimately led her to pursue a different path one where she could combine her legal background with her passion for writing It was this pivot that saw her create How to Buy a Baby, a comedy based on her own struggles with infertility, which garnered international recognition Her success with the series, which was nominated for an International Emmy Award, set the stage for her next big project, My Dead Mom.
Though her career as a creator seemed like the culmination of years of hard work, it was also deeply shaped by the grief of losing her mother, Patricia, at the young age of 23 Litner’s mother died from a rare form of cancer, and the sudden loss at such a formative stage in her life left a void that would linger for years In her own words, Litner describes the loss as one of the most difficult experiences of her life. "It’s such a strange space to be in, realizing they’re gone forever," she shares, reflecting on the profound shift in her life after her mother’s death
In the world of creative storytelling, there arefewnarrativesasraw,real,andrelatable asWendyLitner’sjourney.Alawyerturned writer, Litner’s career has taken a remarkable turn after experiencing profoundpersonalloss.Herlatestcreation, the CBC original series My Dead Mom, is a brilliant mix of comedy and heartbreak, based on the death of her mother. The series showcases her ability to turn grief into something that resonates with audiences across the globe, blending dark humor with the raw emotions of loss. Litner'sjourneytocreatingthisseriesisnot only a story of overcoming personal hardshipbutalsoatestamenttothepower ofresilience,humor,andtransformation.
Grief as a Catalyst for Creativity
The emotional complexity of Litner’s relationship with her mother laid the foundation for My Dead Mom The series explores the awkwardness, frustration, and unspoken truths of mother-daughter relationships, while adding the unique twist of humor as a coping mechanism for grief. Litner explains, "The show came out of the fact that I still hear her all the time She’s always correcting me, trolling me she’s still a part of my life, even though she’s physically gone"
This acknowledgment of grief and the realization that our loved ones never truly leave us is a central theme of My Dead Mom Litner’s portrayal of the loss of her mother resonates with anyone who has experienced the pain of losing a parent In My Dead Mom, Emmy, the protagonist, struggles with her mother’s death while navigating the complexities of life, much like Litner did. Played by Canadian icon Lauren Collins, Emmy is forced to confront her grief in a comedic yet poignant way The show’s core message is simple but powerful: even though mothers may be gone, they never truly leave, and their influence lingers in every aspect of our lives.
Transforming Pain into Humour
For Litner, humor has always been an essential coping mechanism This was evident in her relationship with her mother, who, even in the face of terminal illness, used humor to cope with the gravity of her situation “My mom laughed her way through cancer in the most inspiring way,” Litner recalls. “She made jokes about her condition, called her belly her ‘cancer baby,’ and found humor in the darkest moments”
This ability to laugh in the face of tragedy not only helped Litner heal but also became a crucial component of her work The series is a testament to how humor can be used to process grief and make it more manageable
From a business perspective, Litner’s ability to tap into such personal experiences and translate them into a commercial product offers important lessons for aspiring creators. First, it shows that true creativity often arises from personal experience, particularly painful ones Second, it highlights the importance of humor in business Comedy, while often dismissed as lighthearted, is a powerful tool for building connection and resonance with audiences
The success of My Dead Mom is proof of this. The series has garnered critical acclaim and numerous accolades, including awards for Best Writing, Best Comedy Series, and Best Directing at prestigious festivals. Litner’s ability to weave her personal pain into a compelling and relatable narrative has not only made her a recognized creator but also established her as a pioneer in the grief-comedy space.
The Healing Power of Sharing Stories
For Litner, sharing her story through My Dead Mom has been an act of both personal healing and professional growth “I felt guilty about how to honor my mom,” she shares, “but I realized that the best way to do that was through laughter That’s how I keep her alive in my heart ” This sentiment resonates with the series’ underlying message: grief may never fully go away, but it can be managed, processed, and even laughed through.
The show also sheds light on the way that grief is often silenced or misunderstood, particularly in the Jewish community. Litner, like many others, found herself navigating the awkward and often isolating world of mourning without the support or understanding she needed By creating My Dead Mom, she has provided a space for those experiencing similar loss to feel seen, heard, and understood Through her humor, Litner has turned her grief into a platform for connection, support, and empathy
Turning Grief Into Global Impact
My Dead Mom is not just a TV series; it’s a movement that speaks to the universal experience of loss, but also to the importance of humor, resilience, and community in the face of tragedy. Litner’s success story offers invaluable lessons for anyone looking to turn personal pain into creative or business success By finding humor in hardship and sharing that humor with others, Litner has built a successful career and created a space for others to process their grief
Litner’s journey demonstrates that even in the darkest times, there is potential for growth, creativity, and success. It’s not just about surviving grief it’s about finding ways to thrive, laugh, and create something meaningful out of it As she continues to work on My Dead Mom and other future projects, Litner’s story will undoubtedly inspire others to transform their own pain into art, just as she has done
You can currently stream My Dead Mom on Crave in Canada. Follow the Show on Instagram @mydeadmom or Wendy @wendy litner
FootagefromanepisodewithactorsDavidReale,LaurenCollins,andDanielMaslany
Show Creator, Wendy Litner
grief & gloss grief&gloss
Suhay Gonzalez experienced a life-altering heartbreak when her mother was diagnosed with glioblastoma, a rare and aggressive brain tumor. The diagnosis came suddenly, and the prognosis was grim just three months to live She became her mother’s caregiver, finding solace in small rituals, like applying lipstick to help her feel radiant despite the pain It was through these moments that the seeds of Seis were planted
But the true story of Seis begins after the loss.
“I feel that my grief has evolved over time,” the founder shares “In the past, I tended to keep my pain to myself and channel my emotions into work as a means of coping” Like many who grieve, she threw herself into productivity not as avoidance, but as survival Her work became a vessel for processing the unspeakable, and through that process, something beautiful began to emerge.
Over time, her grief softened not in intensity, but in form. What was once private and consuming transformed into empathy and intention. “Today, I find myself more empathetic towards others who have experienced the loss of a loved one I now take deliberate time for myself and live with intention, embracing each moment fully”
That shift in perspective became a core part of Seis Cosmetics’ identity It’s a brand born from resilience where each lipstick shade is not just a color, but a celebration of life, strength, and the small joys that get us through our hardest days.
As the founder of an independently owned brand, she admits the challenges are real and constant Yet her perspective is one of gratitude: “I’ve learned to view every obstacle as an opportunity for growth and to seek the lessons within each experience Living with gratitude has become a guiding principle for me. ”
It’s not lost on her that many of her proudest accomplishments come with a bittersweet tinge. “While I often feel a sense of grief when I achieve milestones or new successes knowing I cannot celebrate them with her I am deeply aware that I would not be where I am today without the lessons she imparted”
Her mother’s strength and wisdom remain ever-present, shaping her not just as an entrepreneur, but as a woman navigating life with authenticity and heart. That legacy runs through every aspect of Seis from the clean, nourishing formulations to the brand’s commitment to giving back A portion of proceeds is donated to brain tumor research, turning personal tragedy into tangible hope for others
Seis Cosmetics has also earned accolades in the beauty industry, including two recent awards, recognizing the brand’s dedication to quality and innovation.
“My greatest takeaway is that life is a journey filled with memories and experiences. You have to have faith,” she reflects. “I no longer work to build my resume; instead, I am focused on creating legacy one rooted in purpose, resilience, and meaningful impact”
Seis Cosmetics is more than makeup it's a tribute, a healing process, and a beacon for those finding their way through grief In a world obsessed with surface beauty, Seis dares to go deeper proving that the most radiant beauty often comes from within
SEIS COSMETICS IS A LATINA-OWNED BEAUTY BRAND FOUNDED BY SUHAY GONZALEZ IN HONOR OF HER LATE MOTHER, WHO PASSED FROM GLIOBLASTOMA. BORN FROM GRIEF AND RESILIENCE, SEIS OFFERS VEGAN, CRUELTY-FREE LIP CARE AND COLOR COSMETICS DESIGNED TO COMPLEMENT DIVERSE SKIN TONES. WITH A FOCUS ON CLEAN, NOURISHING FORMULAS, THE BRAND BLENDS BEAUTY WITH PURPOSE— DONATING A PORTION OF PROCEEDS TO BRAIN TUMOR RESEARCH. SEIS, MEANING “SIX” IN SPANISH, SYMBOLIZES LEGACY, STRENGTH, AND SELF-EXPRESSION. EACH PRODUCT IS A TRIBUTE TO LIVING WITH INTENTION AND EMBRACING SEISCOSMETICS.COM.
OPENING THE CONVERSATION:
HOWCHILDREN’SBOOKS HELPUSTALKABOUT
Grief
By: Diane Hullet
Diane Hullet of the Best Life Best Death podcast takes us behind the scenes of her recent interview with Jade Adgate of Farewell Library, sharing her biggest takeaways from the conversation.
On episode #183 of the Best Life Best Death podcast, I had the pleasure of speaking with Jade Adgate grief guide, death doula, and founder of the Farewell Library, a Nashville-based resource for death and grief literature
With a background steeped in end-of-life support, Jade has shifted some of her focus in recent years toward education, curating books that help readers of all ages, including the youngest among us enter into the big, often complex, topic of death.
“Books are a gentle entrance into conversations about tender topics,” Jade tells me. It’s this belief that inspired her to begin collecting and sharing stories that can make difficult feelings more approachable.
One book that stands out in Jade’s library is Cry, Heart, But Never Break by Glenn Ringtved In this gentle and poetic story, death is not portrayed as a frightening force, but rather as a compassionate visitor The book reframes our understanding of mortality for children in a way that is empathetic and deeply human.
Another favorite of Jade’s is The End of Something Wonderful: A Practical Guide to Backyard Funerals by Stephanie V W Luciano. This quirky, engaging guide walks families through the experience of saying goodbye to a beloved pet in the backyard, while subtly opening the door to broader conversations about death and ritual
“This book resonates with families who are curious about or already engaged in the home funeral movement,” Jade notes. It’s a touching and accessible way to bring ceremony and meaning into family life, even in the smallest of losses and for what is often a first loss, the death of a beloved animal
For a book that illustrates the importance of presence over words, Jade turns to The Rabbit Listens by Cori Doerrfeld. In this quietly powerful picture book, a child navigating loss is met by a series of well-meaning animals who offer advice, until finally the rabbit comes and simply listens. Jade points to this as a profound reminder: “Sometimes, listening is the most healing thing we can do for someone in grief ”
Jade also recommends A Last Goodbye by Elin Kelsey, a nonfiction book that introduces young readers to how animals experience loss. It’s a beautifully illustrated reminder that death is part of the natural world “Seeing how every creature handles death can bring comfort,” she says, emphasizing that grief is not a uniquely human experience but a universal one.
Two additional titles she mentions in our BLBD conversation offer insight into how children can understand and process big emotions.
The Heart and the Bottle by Oliver Jeffers tells the story of a young girl who bottles up her heart after a profound loss, and the journey she takes to reclaim it. The Truth Pixie by Matt Haig mixes humor and rhyme to explore honesty, fear, and sadness, helping children make sense of the complicated feelings they inevitably encounter
“The books we choose for children can help lay a foundation for dealing with tougher realities later on,” Jade says. “They give them language and context when they need it most ”
Whether you’re a parent, educator, or someone navigating grief, these books offer a gentle, meaningful way to open difficult conversations and to remind us that we can guide children’s experience through the books we choose to share
DIANE HULLET IS A SACRED DEATHCARE GUIDE, DEATH DOULA, AND HOST OF THE BEST LIFE BEST DEATH PODCAST. WITH A BACKGROUND IN EDUCATION AND A DEEP LOVE OF STORYTELLING, DIANE BRINGS WARMTH, INSIGHT, AND CURIOSITY TO CONVERSATIONS ABOUT MORTALITY. SHE IS ALSO THE CO-FOUNDER OF TWO WRENS PRESS, A MOTHER-DAUGHTER PUBLISHING COMPANY CREATING THOUGHTFUL, BEAUTIFUL BOOKS FOR CHILDREN AND FAMILIES. @BESTLIFEBESTDEATH | @TWOWRENSPRESS
JADE ADGATE IS A DEATH DOULA, HOLISTIC DEATH CARE EDUCATOR, AND PODCAST HOST AT BEVIVAL’S EXIT INTERVIEWS PODCAST. YOU CAN FIND OUT MORE ABOUT JADE’S WORK SERVING THE MIDDLE TENNESSEE COMMUNITY AT FAREWELL FELLOWSHIP, OR HER DEATH DOULA TRAINING AND IN-PERSON APPRENTICESHIP AT FAREWELL EDUCATION, OR FIND A CURATED DEATH LITERATE AND GRIEF AWARE COLLECTION AT THE FAREWELL LIBRARY. @THE.FAREWELL.LIBRARY
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Get Griefy Community Blog is a space for the grief community to share their grief experiences, art, writing and more The inspiring, heartbreaking, and everything in between.
Rochelle Cowper - Poetry | @paperclip gal
Rochelle is a Certified Professional Life Coach writing her first book about her experiences of life, loss, and healing after the death of her son, Dave, by suicide.
“Let’s get to the heart of the matter” I hear you say
“Okay God, that’s an interesting way to start my day”
I sit in my chair, with Chloe at my feet
A hot mug of coffee and creamer to make it scrumptiously sweet.
I settle in and let my heart speak It’s not gonna be pretty, as it feels quite weak.
Its edges are jagged and very rough, Piercing to the core the pain cries, “Please stop that’s enough!!!!!”
But my heart doesn’t listen, it knows not when to quit, it just keeps on aching, sometimes burning like a candle that’s been lit
There’s an emptiness that cannot be described, Like a yearning – a longing, I wish would subside
“My faith in You doesn’t erase this, so what good are You for? It’s a fair question, often asked when a child is here no more.”
Anger begins to scald my insides, and my heart screams at You, ”Why? Why? Why?”
It knows there would be no answer, that would ever make this right, yet it keeps on asking, hoping to win the fight
“Tell me about this fight, I really want to know Let it all out, no reason to put on a show.”
“I know I can trust you with my anger and my love Your shoulders are broad and they can take what I shove.”
“There’s this shadow that follows me, wherever I go I can’t shake it, it’s gray and dampens everything that glows”
I wonder, I wonder, “Will it ever go away?” Or am I going to be forced to live with this each and every day?”
My heart is so tender and easily bruised. While experiencing grief, it’s not one bit amused
“Listen my child, please listen with your heart I long to heal you but I need you to do your part.”
“You’ve got to be kidding Is this some kind of joke?”
“No, my precious one. Take hold of my yoke. For when your burdens are heavy, take hold of my hand I promise to guide you, so you can withstand There will be storms in this life for sure But my promise to you through it all, you’ll be safe and secure I know that doesn’t take away the sorrow But it will get you through each and every tomorrow”
GET GRIEFY
Andrea Turnbow - Ceramics | @thegriefnook
Andrea is the founder of The Grief Nook, a comfortable space to process, express, and creatively grieve in community.
During a beautiful grief gathering hosted by Sunday Mournings last year, we had the opportunity to sculpt with clay I chose an autumn leaf to represent Autumn, the soul I lost during my first pregnancy I shaped it as a bowl to hold all of my son’s rocks and gems that he finds on our adventures and brings home with him However, it eventually ended up on my desk as a candle holder where I see it every day and think of both Autumn and my son.
Melissa Bottorff-Arey - Poetry | @theleftoverpieces
Melissa is founder of The Leftover Pieces Podcast & Community, is a grief companion supporting suicide loss survivors through honest conversations, retreats, and healing resources
My Grieving Soul
My grief is the ocean
She moves without warning She rises high, then disappears She rages, she rests
Some days, she holds me up
Other days, she swallows me whole.
She is wide, wild, beautiful, terrible, steady
She touches everything, even the parts of me I do not know.
There are treasures hidden deep
There are monsters too I never know which I’ll find
She carries me far from myself. She brings me back again
She holds my memories. She cradles my dreams
She knows every piece of me
She does not ask permission
She simply is
The ocean speaks the language of my soul
Because she is my soul
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Vallen Webb -Blog Post |
@vallenwebb.official
Vallen Webb is a mom, postpartum and bereavement doula, and podcaster who transforms personal tragedy into purpose through mindset work, healing, and compassionate, expert-led support for loss families and the professionals who serve them.
Loss of Trust In Body, Providers, and Faith
When Evelyn died, I didn’t just lose my baby I lost trust in nearly everything that once made me feel safe
I lost trust in my body. For 40 weeks and 5 days, it had carried her beautifully I had felt strong, healthy, and connected this pregnancy felt like a gift. But after her heart stopped beating, everything shifted My body, which I thought was the safest place in the world for my daughter, had become a battleground. I began to question everything: How did I not know? Why didn’t I listen to the knowing I felt deep in my bones? I had spent my motherhood protecting my children yet when it mattered most, I couldn’t protect her That wound runs deeper than words It was the moment I began to doubt not only my intuition but the very body that birthed life and death
I lost trust in my care providers. I begged for a cesarean I pleaded through sobs for an epidural And still, I was coerced, denied, and forced to labor for hours with my dead child inside me. Their refusal to honor my voice, to see my trauma in real time, broke something in me In those moments, I was not a person to them I was a patient on a schedule They called it “natural,” but nothing about that experience was humane I was violated in the most vulnerable hours of my life, and it reshaped how I view medical authority I now advocate for others so they don’t have to face what I did voiceless, disregarded, and suffering in silence.
And I lost trust in God I had been clinging to threads of faith for years, but Evelyn’s death severed the last ones I had prayed, dreamed, and planned I had asked for protection I had begged for peace. I begged God to let her come back, I held her limp, warm body and cried and pleaded, that I would give anything he asked if He just gave me my baby back What kind of God lets a baby die the day she’s supposed to be born? How does any divine being watch a mother hold her lifeless daughter and not intervene? That silence hollowed me My faith didn’t hold me through that storm; it cracked and scattered into pieces I still haven’t fully gathered
Grief, I’ve learned, isn’t just about what you lose It’s about what it reveals And in the aftermath of loss, the veil is lifted on everything: the systems we once trusted, the people we thought would protect us, the beliefs we clung to for meaning. Nothing is sacred after a child dies not even faith Not even the body that carried her
And yet from that brokenness, I’ve started to rebuild something new I no longer blindly trust I intentionally choose. I listen harder to my intuition I advocate louder for others I ask deeper questions of Universe, Source, of myself, of this life The safety I once felt is gone, but in its place is a new kind of strength one born from devastation, but shaped by this new truth Evelyn’s life revealed so much And her death revealed even more.
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Angie Hanson - Blog Post | @butterfliesandhalos
Angie is an author, grief coach, and founder of Butterflies + Halos, inspiring hope and resilience through heartfelt stories, healing support, and meaningful connections.
"Walking Through Loss: The Art of Surviving a Thousand Goodbyes"
Some people collect stamps Some people collect vintage salt-andpepper shakers. Apparently, I collect losses
It wasn’t a collection I asked for, and trust me, I’d trade the whole shelf of sorrow for one more hug But here I am, someone who has learned to keep walking even when the road feels like it’s been paved with broken glass
The first loss knocked the air out of my lungs I thought that was the worst of itthe way your world can split open with a single phone call, a single moment. But grief, in its infinite creativity, wasn’t done with me Loss after loss piled up like an avalanche; my son, my husband, my brother until I wasn’t sure which ache belonged to which goodbye It all blended into one heavy, aching hum.
Here’s what nobody tells you about multiple losses: You don’t "get better" at it You get different at it
You build weird little survival muscles tiny stitches of strength sewn with trembling hands You learn that laughter and tears can live in the same second. You understand that joy isn't the absence of pain; it's the rebellion against it
I’ve had people tilt their heads and ask, "How do you do it?"
Cue the awkward half-smile and internal scream
How do I do it? I don’t Not neatly Not nobly I show up with mascara running and heart splintered, trying my best to put one foot in front of the other, even if it’s more of a limp than a stride some days
Grief has turned me into a person who can find beauty in weird places like a sunrise that looks suspiciously like hope, or a song on the radio that feels like a wink from heaven Grief has also made me fluent in snark, because if I don’t roll my eyes at how unfair it is sometimes, I might just drown in the unfairness
Mostly, grief has taught me that love never dies It shape-shifts
It sneaks into new corners
It becomes the reason I keep going, even when I’m tired of carrying all this missing
Multiple losses don't make you a hero. They don’t make you wise They don’t make you "stronger" in any glamorous, inspirational-quote way They just strip you down to your raw, shimmering bones and if you're lucky, they show you that even in your most broken places, you are still somehow, stubbornly, dazzlingly alive.
And dang it if that isn’t a miracle worth honoring
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Barbara Karnes - Blog Post | @barbarakarnesrn
Barbara Karnes, RN is a renowned expert in the field of death and dying. With a career spanning four decades, she has made significant contributions as an end-of-life educator and advocate. She gained prominence as an early hospice pioneer during the AIDS crisis and has since become a respected figure in the field.
Sitting at so many bedsides with the dying and their families, a common question I’m asked is, “How do we plan a warm, personal celebration of life or funeral when our special person didn’t attend church?” My first response is always, think with your heart What would be appreciated by your person? What would be meaningful for those gathered to say goodbye?
I will share some ideas to get you started if you are in this situation
Have an open casket, visitation gathering (which is helpful in our grieving) An open casket is more healing and personal than a closed casket or memorial service with a large portrait
Dress your person how they would normally dress If that's more formal, fine Just know it doesn't have to be a Sunday suit or dress-up attire if that's not their personality Think golf clothes or favorite football team jersey My own mother wanted to be in her robe. Said she was going to be asleep for a long time, so she might as well be comfortable
Encourage family and friends to share favorite stories about your special person
Create a picture board with photos of favorite events and memories Put it on an easel (the funeral home will have one if you’re using their services). This makes a great place to gather and share stories
Create a playlist of favorite music and play from the overhead speaker system
You don't need to have clergy present. You can do this yourself
Make the flower arrangement special to you and the family Maybe a rose for each family member, different colors for grandchildren Again, be creative It isn't how much you spend but what it says to you
Part of the specialness of doing your own service/celebration of their life is the planning. The gathering of those who loved them gathered together deciding how to celebrate their love and life That planning of the gathering will be as memorable for you all as the service itself Don't let one person plan, make it a family, friends, group effort Healing is there
You get the idea You can do anything you want to celebrate your person’s life Be creative. What would your person appreciate? How do you want to remember them?
And afterwards, when you have a quiet moment, write down your wishes for your own celebration of life Those who love you that you will be leaving behind, will greatly appreciate this gift
Blessings, Barbara
ABOUT THE CREATOR
Get Griefy is created by Kera Sanche high school dean, Navy wife, and mom two based in the Chicagoland area.
Kera is also a keynote speaker educational consultant with a focus on trauma- and grief-informed practices in secondary education. With a deep commitment to helping educators better support grieving students, she aims to create more compassionate, responsive school communities one conversation at a time.
p y that pizzazz back into your life, even amidst tough times.
To connect, collaborate, or inquire about speaking engagements, reach out at kerasanchez@getgriefymagazine.com
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