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amazing
THE ANNUAL
girls! ISSUE
featuring Alli Belk & 6 More Amazing LKN Girls!
LAKE
NORMAN
V O L U M E
X I I I
,
FIND US ON
WOMAN
N U M B E R
X I
womenpower WE ALMOST SKIPPED THE AMAZING GIRLS ISSUE THIS YEAR.
We worried that in the face of a modern-day plague that had taken so much from us—the health of so many, our peace of mind, our financial security, our jobs, and even our toilet paper—that a more virus-focused theme might be called for instead. After some polling and debating, we unanimously agreed that despite the pandemic—or more accurately, because of it—this is the perfect time for an issue celebrating our future leaders. I was glad. The Amazing Girls issue is my favorite—the accomplishments of the young women we feature never cease to blow me away. This year is no exception. And even though my nails look like I’ve been digging shallow graves with them and my hair resembles that of a Chia Pet, the spunk of our class of 2020 lets me know that we’re going to be ok, all we have to do is be a little bit more like them.
DANA JORDAN
KIM CROSS
I know as a teen, I wasn’t much like them at all. Very focused on my “troubles”—parent troubles, school troubles, boyfriend troubles—negative thoughts set the tone of my entire adolescence. My whole life consisted of getting angry over things I didn’t want to do: homework, algebra (I still get the heebie-jeebies over that one), chores, college applications, part-time jobs, interacting with anybody other than my friends, getting out of bed before noon. With a loving and patient mother to guide me, my faith, and some muchneeded growing up, I eventually came through the other side of those turbulent years. Since then, I’ve been much more of a “the glass is half full” kind of gal. Until the coronavirus, that is. Anxious and feeling helpless, I found myself stomping around in my day pajamas (because wearing the pajamas I slept in the night before would just be unseemly) with a big frown on my face wishing poxes upon toilet paper hoarders, obsessively cleaning my keyboard though I’m the only one touching it, and binge watching what passes for the news these days. Remember the “Inside Out” movie character called “Anger” who yells, throws things, and whose head literally combusts off and on throughout the movie? Yea, I had pretty much turned into him. Perhaps it’s the optimism of the girls in these pages that so contrasts with my teenage years and my more recent coronavirus funk that resonated with me, or maybe it was their collective determination to not let obstacles of any sort deter them from their dreams. Either way, in reading their stories it has indeed become clear to me that we will all get through this. Sure, the virus has taken a lot from us, but it cannot take the indomitable spirit of these young ladies. And the grit and moxie they possess is just as contagious as covid19. I hope that you are inspired by their stories as much as I have been, and I pray that we not only catch their stoutheartedness, but pass it on so that it spreads like … well, you know… a virus. w
DANA JORDAN PUBLISHER
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JUNE CONTRIBUTORS:
Carly Correll; Erin Crome; Kim Cross; Cyndy Etler; Grace Graham; Dr. Matt Lineberger; Michelle Love; Vanessa Richardson; Emily Thomas CONTACT US:
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CELEBRATING THE
SUCCESS
OF
WOMEN
june contents 2020
amazing LKN girls 9
Thank You Collage
18
Raemy Wensil
20
Lacey Caroline
22
Madison Dellinger
24
Chloe Jeghers
26
Twa’nae Horton
27
Alli Belk
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Kailee Queen
44
2020 Girls On The Go
This year for our 9th annual Amazing LKN Girls’ issue, we asked the girls to submit their own photos in an effort to stop the spread of COVID-19. Thank you to them, their families, & our staff for being flexible & so helpful! COVE R PH OTO PR OVI D ED BY S H A NA NI CO L E PH OTO & JULI E BELK
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lake norman
STRONG 30 Deals & discounts to support local Lake Norman businesses
Cool Father’s Day Gifts
p
12
p
family
self
10
Teaching From Home ... And What About Summer?!
30
8 THINGS: 8 Cool Father’s Day Gifts
36
TEENS ALOUD: Lessons From Quarantine Schooling
46
Words Matter
48
MIND, BODY, SPIRIT: Stretching Your Mind, Body, Spirit
40
Lessons Of Military Operational Security Applied To Family Safety Part 2
recipe 32
features 38
SOUL SISTERS: Carly Correll & Michelle Love
Spinach And Cream Cheese Stuffed Cod
the
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cutest LKN
health Not Your Mama’s Orthodontist
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Our annual pet contest is now accepting your submission!
PET
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Robinson Tabor 704-502-2352 LakeNormanSummer@aol.com
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YEARS EXPERIENCE
7259 Albemarle Drive, Denver $439,900
Lot 5 Junpier Lane, Denver $65,000
Almost new home in Covington at Lake Norman Estates located toward the cul-de-sac. This home features 6 bedrooms (Or 5 bedrooms plus a bonus room) and 4 bathrooms. Gourmet kitchen with granite, SS appliances, double oven, gas cooktop, walk in pantry and fridge. Formal Living & Dining Room. Awesome backyard with covered porch, brick paver patio & firepit, fenced yard that backs up to trees on .41 lot! Community pool, playground and boat storage.
Treed lot in the quiet Lakewood subdivision. This lot is .68 of an acre. Buy now and build later. This lot would be great for a crawl space or a slab. The middle of the lot has a great, flat building pad. This neighborhood has upscale homes with many of them being on the water. The homes are spaced out well and all unique. Community has a gated boat storage area. Public boat launch is located at the end of the street on Burton. Survey on file.
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TWA’NAE HORTON
RAEMY WENSIL
CHLOE JEGHERS
LACEY CAROLINE
KAILEE QUEEN
LKNW Amazing Girls 2020, along with all of us here at Lake Norman Woman , would like to thank all frontline responders & essential workers.
MADISON DELLINGER
ALLI BELK
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family
A D V I C E F R O M A N E X P E R T:
images: Freepik.com
teaching from home … and what about summer?!
working from home, extended family togetherness time, and the unknown of if or when we’ll see “normal” again has many families uncertain of how to approach summer plans. Many children handle difficult situations or lack of structure (like with the pandemic) by complaining about being bored, appearing unmotivated, or griping that something isn’t fun. This is often seen when someone struggles with executive functioning such as time management, prioritization, planning, initiation, and problem solving. Executive functioning skills are the processes and actions our brain performs to get us through everyday tasks. When these skills are inefficient, it causes difficulty with determining what is important, how long a task will take to complete, or how to solve a problem. Here’s a few ways to make your child’s remote learning and summer break experience a positive one. THE RE C E N T C HA LLE N G E S O F R E M OTE LE A R N I N G ,
Make a schedule and have it accessible to know
what the current activity is, what’s next, when a break is coming, and when the fun begins. By laminating the LIFE HACK HACK:: Instead of laminating the schedule, a dry-erase marker schedule, write it on a piece can be used to cross off of paper and slip it inside a clear-front binder cover. completed tasks, show If the schedule changes, progress for the day, and you can pull it out of the cover, erase, and modify make it visually easier to as needed--then return scan for the next activity. to the binder cover.
*
When introducing a difficult or nonpreferred task (i.e. homework), try
letting your child choose something they can work for if they complete their work. Make sure it’s something you are willing to follow through with. It could be screen time, board games, building Legos, making cookies, a sticker, etc. If you prefer not using an object or activity as a reward, you can use a token system (picture, chip, tally mark) to work toward something. (For example, earn 25 tokens = pick a movie to watch. Twenty-five tokens could take one day or three days to earn depending on how often you choose to give out tokens.)
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When attempting nonpreferred activities, always
keep lingo positive. Try giving occasional praise to show a task is doable (i.e. “Nice job working on those 10 problems and asking for help.” or “I like how you tried to solve the problem and didn’t quit!”) Do not take away tokens. This almost always starts arguments, whining, or refusal to continue, and is the opposite of what you’re trying to accomplish. If your child is making poor choices, try positive reminders (i.e. “I really want to give you a token so you can earn family movie night, but I need to see a quiet voice and a calm body first.”)
Remember, every child is different. A different type of learner, with different skill abilities, different responses to difficult tasks, different motivations, different emotional experiences. All of these affect how a child approaches a task and how you should approach each child. w
L K N e x p e rt
Erin Crome is the owner and occupational therapist of Cool Beans Therapy Clubhouse located in Cornelius. Working with special needs children for more than a decade and the daily inspiration from her 9-year-old autistic son, she is uniquely qualified to help parents from both sides of the table. Visit coolbeanstherapyclubhouse.com for more information about services and free resources.
WRITER ERIN CROME
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lake norman
STRONG
Our local businesses need you more than ever, and they, in turn, know that after being cooped up for the past months, you need something to get excited about! They are offering these fantastic deals and discounts on their products and services, so let’s buy locally and support Lake Norman businesses, the bedrock of our community.
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lake norman STRONG
WE APPRECIATE YOU
The past few months have been difficult. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for supporting us in the fight against COVID-19.
#MyHealthMyIredell IredellHealth.org
704.873.5661
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amazing girls! “EVERYTHING I AM and all my success is from Jesus Christ … without Him I am nothing,” professes the delightfully engaging and giving teen, Raemy Wensil. This quote sums up the empathetic and selfless nature of Raemy as does her favorite scripture, Romans 8:28 which says “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” Having finished her senior year online at East Lincoln High School, Raemy will be attending Gaston College for two years after which she will enroll in university to finish her degree in special education; Raemy intends to be a special education teacher. Frequently described as an amazing young woman with a heart as big as all outdoors, Raemy’s true passion and purpose showed itself when she learned about a family friend who had cancer. She immediately wanted to help, and she did so by selling handmade hair bows. Fast forward to today and Angel Bows by Raemy is a local nonprofit organization that has helped raise over $147,000 to help families with medical expenses related to cancer treatments. “I started the organization for a special family friend named Joyce Hoyle,” Raemy explains. “Joyce was so sweet, caring, and always putting others first. She inspired me to help others in need. I was also involved with Mustang Project at East Lincoln High School where I served as vice president; this club volunteers to help special needs students with their Special Olympics, proms, and other events … it was wonderful to be a part of it!” In 2014, Raemy was invited to be a guest on the Steve Harvey Show where she got to share her story as well as gain some muchneeded national recognition for her nonprofit. “After being on the show, so many people that I didn’t even know were thanking me and encouraging me … I had hair bow orders from Canada, Hawaii, and all over! People were hearing my story of giving hope, and I was fulfilling my mission of ‘Tying Up Cancer One Bow at a Time.’”
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Raemy is also a competitive clogger and cheerleader at Southern Starz Cheer & Dance Co. She teaches beginner classes and works in their afterschool and summer programs. Faithfully involved in her youth group at church, Raemy is a Cubbies Awana leader and children’s church worker. “I have learned,” Raemy shares, “that even though the world may seem like it is against us at times, there is always something to be grateful for and I know that Jesus will never leave my side.” w
WRITER LESLIE OGLE
PHOTO JENNIFER RIDER HALL
2020
amazing girl
LACEY caroline
“THE SHOW MUST GO ON” is an expression in the entertainment world and could also be used to describe the tenacity and stickto-itiveness of 13-year-old Lacey Caroline, a Cornelius resident and Hollywood star in the making. Lacey is a SAG actress who got her start playing mini Rufus at a Charlotte Bobcats game. Lacey admits that the world of entertainment can be demanding and very competitive, but she finds her motivation by inspiring others to work towards their goals as well. “Never stop trying,” Lacey says. “Out of 100 auditions, it only takes one to get you noticed, but you have to get that ONE!” Starting out as a dancer and all-star cheerleader before discovering her passion for acting, Lacey has had a starring role in the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie “A Christmas Love Story” and played the lead character in “Harbor Island,” which was filmed in the Lake Norman area in 2019. Lacey has already accomplished one of the career goals she set for 2020, having signed with a major agency to represent her. She also hopes to be cast in a mainstream television or movie production this year. Having helped produce “Harbor Island,” Lacey has her sights set on becoming a producer and director in addition to continuing her acting career. She also hopes to pursue a degree in psychology; she feels that would enable her to help others, and it would give her greater insight into the characters she plays. Another of Lacey’s loves is travel and because of her roles in television and short films, she has been to Paris, Los Angeles, New York City, Las Vegas, Dallas, and other national and international locales. Japan and Bora Bora top her list of places she’d like to experience next. A passionate supporter of local theater and the Cain Center for the Arts, Lacey performed at their Inaugural Founders’ Ball and a private event accompanied by Cornelius Mayor Woody Washam. She sang the National Anthem at the Cornelius Town Board Induction meeting and continues to work with NBC Sports as an NBC Kid Reporter for NASCAR and Supercross. “I am truly blessed to have such an amazing family who supports me in all I do,” Lacey smiles. “My parents inspire me daily and are my biggest role models. They taught me to always be yourself, follow your passion, don’t be afraid to make mistakes, and never be afraid to sing … use your voice!” w
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WRITER KIM CROSS
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2020
amazing girl
MADISON dellinger AFTER NOT RESPONDING TO LIGHT during a check-up when she was three months old, Madison Dellinger was diagnosed with septo optic dysplasia and optic nerve hypoplasia and remains visually impaired today. But with a bucket list of aspirations and dreams she plans on achieving, Madison’s vision for her future is crystal clear. At age 4, Madison and her father, Andrew, and grandmother, April Warren, traveled to China where she received a total of six stem cell infusions (not the controversial embryonic stem cells, but cells that otherwise would be considered medical waste). Since then, Andrew has noted marked improvement in Madison’s vision. Prior to the therapy, she had little light perception; now she can distinguish some difference in color and can see her iPad when held close to her face.
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There is a multitude of technological products on the market today to help Madison. She uses a talking watch, for example, and Voiceover allows her to use voice commands on her iPad. There are some challenges, though, that simply require old-fashioned determination. That’s ok by Madison, who readily admits that “things are different” for her when it comes to mobility and learning compared to those with sight. Undaunted, she relishes the challenge. “Those things are obstacles only if I let them be,” she asserts. Rest assured, the obstacles don’t stand a chance. Madison actually views them as opportunities to develop special skills, such as the ability to read braille, becoming proficient with the assistive technology, and mastering orientation and mobility techniques. That, of course, doesn’t mean it’s been easy. Perfecting the white
cane technique alone, which allows Madison to detect terrain changes and obstacles in her environment, involved an inordinate amount of practicing tapping, centering, staying in step, arching wide enough, and trusting the information her cane provided. What it comes down to is that Madison simply refuses to allow her vision to limit her ability to live life to its fullest. She’s an A/B honor roll student at East Lincoln Middle School, and when she’s not studying she enjoys playing games with friends on her iPad or splashing around in a pool or at the beach. She continues to work on her braille reading skills with the hopes of eventually becoming a certified braillist. Will there be obstacles on the way to that dream? Why sure—those exist for the visually impaired and the sighted alike. But I have no doubt Madison will forge her way around any roadblocks, allowing nothing to hold her back from her dreams. w WRITER DANA JORDAN
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amazing girl
chloe
JEGHERS CARING. INSIGHTFUL. KIND. Those are the words folks use to describe 16-year-old Chloe Jeghers. With her feathery voice and sweet features, passersby mistake her for a seraph. The Greatest Generation was stoic. The Boomers are self-empowered. Generation X is individualistic; the Millennials are outspoken. Generation Z, in contrast, is others-focused. Chloe takes this trait to a whole new level with a deep, empathetic understanding of the emotions and needs of others. She’s the friend peers turn to for support; the teenager parents trust to babysit their kids.
Chloe is a volunteer at Shining Hope Farms, which provides equine-assisted therapeutic activities for people with special needs. Or in Chloe’s words, it’s “somewhere they can go to calm down, to relax.” Chloe plans to be an occupational therapist, so she closely observes as the occupational therapist works with kids who have disabilities and illnesses.
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“My volunteer work helps me relate to people with disabilities,” she says. “I understand where they’re coming from when they talk with the occupational therapists. They vent about how they feel inside, how much they hate school, how someone takes their lunch…so many kids experience that, and we don’t even know it until they open up and talk to you about it.” Chloe looks forward to the day when she is that someone that kids talk to about their struggles. She herself rides horses, as her mother did before her. Jumping is her specialty. She calls the barn her Zen place and loves the connection she shares with the horses. “Horses really do sense when you’re feeling a certain way,” she smiles. Like so many highly empathic teens, Chloe realized that studying independently would allow her to better focus on her academics. “My priority right now is my future career in the medical field. Virtual high school helps me keep my focus on what’s important: my future helping others.” Those future kids who work with angelic Chloe will be lucky kids indeed. w
WRITER CYNDY ETLER
TWAho’N A E rton
2020
amazing girl
THE WORD “LIMITATIONS” isn’t even on Twa’nae Horton’s radar. In fact, she’s way too busy chasing her dreams to give “can’t” a second thought. Seventeen-year-old Twa’nae was diagnosed at birth with Down syndrome. In no way though did this tenacious high school senior allow her diagnosis to eclipse her shine. In fact, in the words of her principal, Tracey Pickard, she is “the sparkle of Hopewell.” Naturally gregarious, Twa’nae delights in the art of conversation. In other words, she loves to chat! But her verbosity is not of the usual, self-focused teen style; instead, Twa’nae is much more interested in the well-being and happiness of others. Her teachers frequently find her comforting students who are having a bad day, reassuring them with kind words and a hug. “She’ll talk to anyone during an initial meeting as if she has known them for years,” observes her teacher, Mr. Allen. Pickard adds: “Her confidence and zeal for life is contagious to everyone who meets her.” Twa’nae was not always as confident as she is now, however. “Some people put a ‘label’ on me as physically and mentally incompetent because I’m not like others,” she says, adding, “Sometimes I would come home from school crying because I felt like I didn’t fit in.” But thanks in part to a strong family support system (she has two sisters and one brother) and her dedicated teachers, Twa’nae has blossomed into a self-assured young woman. There is no question that Twa’nae’s most ardent supporter is her mother, Chrissy Brown. While no mother wants to learn that her child has a disability, Chrissy decided as soon as she held newborn Twa’nae that Down syndrome would not stop her baby from following her dreams. Chrissy fiercely advocated for Twa’nae so that her disability would not affect others’ perception of what she was able to accomplish. “She motivates me to be the best me I can be,” says Twa’nae of her mother’s influence. “And because of her, I am very unapologetic about the person I have become.” Twa’nae’s unstoppable determination has paid off. Like most teens, she loves music, dancing, and YouTube. And like most seniors, she looks forward to her graduation with plans to attend college in the future. For now, though, Twa’nae is content with sharing her indomitable spirit with the world and inspiring others, advising “Don’t stop being you. Let who you are shine, and it will all be worth it in the end.” w
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WRITER DANA JORDAN
2020
amazing girl
alli belk DON’T LET ALLI BELK’S petite stature fool you. While she may not be as tall as other children her age, this rising 5th grader’s initiative to make a difference in the lives of area seniors is anything but child’s play. There’s no doubt that Alli’s awareness of the importance of family interaction and the comfort and security it brings to us is quite mature for one so young. Hailing from a very tight-knit family (she considers older sister Lauren and younger brother Bryson to be among her best friends), as her ninth birthday approached Alli realized that many seniors do not have the same familial support system. “My family inspires me all the time,” she explains. “We’re there for each other if we need anything and we stick together, even when times are rough. I wanted senior citizens who might not have visitors every day to feel safe and secure too.” Foregoing presents that year, Alli asked friends and family to donate stuffed animals for her birthday instead. They responded in a big way, and Alli WRITER DANA JORDAN
collected and delivered more than 75 “furr-ever” friends to residents in an assisted living facility in the area, providing them with something warm and comforting to hold onto when their families are unable to visit. The response to that first trip was so positive, Alli turned her birthday idea into an ongoing project called Stuffies for Seniors in which she and her volunteers not only deliver plush pets but also play games and sing songs with the seniors. The best part is that Alli and her helpers get as much from the residents as they give: “It is so fun to see their smiling faces!” she says. Making people smile is something of a hobby for Alli. And with her big, fun-loving, outgoing personality that belies her petite size, it’s a talent that comes naturally. She hopes to put those people skills to use one day as a popstar, a career in which she can make others happy while singing, dancing, entertaining, and performing—activities she simply loves. As part of the Showstoppers song and dance club at Grand Oak Elementary in Huntersville and with roles in a number of local commercials, she’s already on her way. The well-known challenges that aspiring entertainers face do not daunt Alli in the least, though; instead, flashing a megawatt smile of her own, she asserts “Anything is possible if I keep trying my hardest and don’t give up!” w
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amazing girl
KAqIuLeeEn E
ON ANY GIVEN THURSDAY autumn evening, 17-year-old Lake Norman Charter student Kailee Queen will often be found at her school’s JV football game, cheering on her JV cheerleading squad. As captain of the varsity cheer team, much of Kailee’s time is occupied mentoring other young cheerleaders. Her dedication and involvement does not stop on the field though. Kailee has also demonstrated her strong leadership skills in helping to start the Diversity Club at her school. She is involved in other organizations as well, including the Key Club, Pre-Med Club, National Science Honor Society and the Spanish National Honor Society, while also playing an active role in Lake Norman Young Life. Perhaps the most rewarding devotion of her time, however, is her partnership with the Kennedy Strong Foundation— which was established to support local families who have children diagnosed with Down syndrome, an effort that Kailee has become remarkably invested in through her participation in many of the foundation’s campaigns and official events.
A favorite quote that Kailee turns to a lot, “Do your best and let God do the rest,” comes from the woman who inspires her the most, her grandma. “As my best friend and role model,” Kailee smiles, “I see my grandma as a person who is extremely selfless and loving. She is a very religious person and has been a major push in my relationship with Christ.” Kailee has further solidified this relationship through being a part of the leadership team at her church. Kailee’s job working as a wedding planner’s assistant at Erin Padgett Events has given her irreplaceable experiences in time management, tackling tedious projects, and becoming truly independent. She credits her boss with being someone she looks up to, saying that “she constantly motivates and inspires me, and I can say she has truly contributed to my present and future successes.” Following her high school graduation, Kailee will be attending Appalachian State University to pursue a medical career as a nurse anesthetist. She plans to immerse herself in the medical world, continue her dedication to many outof-school responsibilities, and perhaps study abroad somewhere in Europe. “Inevitably in this life,” Kailee so wisely imparts, “your morals will be challenged and people will try to influence what you do and who you are.
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Not giving in to the pressures of society is something that will take you far in life. It will remind you that you are strong and special in this world.” w WRITER EMILY THOMAS
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FLOATING GOLF TUR F GAM E www.thegrommet.com
8 things COOL COFFEE STUFF www.grimbeancoffee.com
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Father’ s Day
HOME BREW STARTER KIT www.morebeer.com
MEAT! hasteaks.com ma w.o ww
gifts
OUTDOOR FIRE PIT www.homedepot.com
CLASSIC TU RNTABLE www.uturnaudio.com
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WIRELESS BIKE SPEAKER www.avantree.com
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recipe
YOU WILL NEED: Cod or a thick-cut white fish (you want thick cuts of fish so you can slit a pocket in them for stuffing) Large package of fresh baby spinach 8 oz. package of cream cheese ½ cup of bread crumbs or dry stuffing Olive oil Parmesan shake cheese Shredded blend of cheeses (your preference) ½ cup of diced onion
Spinach and Cream Cheese Stuffed Stuffed
Cod
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TO PREPARE: Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray a large baking dish with non-stick spray and place a layer of fresh baby spinach in the bottom of the dish.
1
In mixing bowl, combine 2 cups chopped spinach with softened cream cheese, bread crumbs, and diced onions. Salt and pepper to taste.
2
Cut a slit in each of the cod pieces and press the mixture in, securing with toothpicks if necessary. Place on the bed of spinach in your prepared baking dish.
3
Cover the fish with shredded blend of cheese, sprinkle generously with parmesan shake cheese, and drizzle with olive oil.
4
Bake for approximately 50 minutes -- fish is done when it flakes with a fork and the parmesan cheese top is golden brown. w
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DO YOU HAVE THE CUTEST PET EVER?
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Would you like to see your pet featured in our September issue? Enter today and Ellie Belly make your cutie a star!Barkley
TO ENTER: Laci
Go Layla to & Lillie www.LakeNormanWoman.com, click on “Cutest Pet Contest”
Mia
· Fill out submission form & upload your photo no later than July 13
· All photos should be in color & in focus. · Voting Period is July 16-22 on Facebook Olive
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F AMI L Y
teens teensaloud! aloud!
YOUR TEEN, TRANSLATED
e n i t n a quar M
S O H O W ’ S YO U R QUARANTINE BEEN GOING?
Kids are sleeping past 5:30 AM. (And parents are letting them!)
If you’ve got a teenager at home, I’m betting there have been some�challenges. But I’d also bet there have been some unexpected bright spots. Every kid I work with in my role as a life coach for teens has uncovered gems in the midst of the Covid pandemic. At the start of their sessions, they’re now smiling and ready to share the good events from the past week. What a shift from the pervasive academic anxiety that has long haunted high schoolers!
You’re probably familiar with the research on adolescent circadian rhythms, and the fact that teens have a biological drive to go to sleep later, and wake up later, than 7:15 school start times allow. With virtual schooling, kids are able to match their sleep to their natural clock. A well-rested teen is a happier teen. That’s a win all around.
With an eye toward an eventual return to normal, let’s look at the wins teens have found in the midst of the current strangeness, and consider ways we can help them bring these goodies into their regular routine.
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With virtual classes, distractions are removed. My teen coaching clients report that they are getting their schoolwork done in one-fourth of the time, because there are no interruptions. They don’t have to worry about peer dynamics, or worry about their appearance, or wait as a classmate asks questions designed to derail the teacher’s lesson (or as the teacher talks about their kids or cats or athletic team!). They have free time to explore personal interests. Why does every teen suddenly play the ukulele? I don’t know, but I’m not complaining. With the zillion competing must-dos scrubbed from their schedules, kids now have time to let their brain drift. To pursue hobbies with no pressured outcomes. To do activities for simple enjoyment. If I was to offer an antidote to adolescent anxiety, brain drift and simple enjoyment would be among my top two prescriptions.
image: Freepik.com
RO LESSONS F
What can we do with this knowledge? If you’re a kidsrights warrior, maybe you’ll storm the next school board meeting and demand that the high schools push out their start times. But if Sisyphean tasks are not your jam, here’s an easier idea: ask your teen what’s been good for them about this epic break from normal. Ask them if they’d like to incorporate any of that good into their days over the long term. And together, brainstorm ways to do just that. In the rearview, this weird life-onpause phase will look like one big bright spot, illuminating a better way forward. w L K N e x p e rt
Cyndy Etler is a board-certified teen life coach and awardwinning young adult memoir author. Her work has been featured on CNN, NPR, CBS’ The Doctors, Huffpost, Today’s Parent, and other international media.
WRITER CYNDY ETLER
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FEATU R E
soul sisters
A Soul Sister is someone you can talk to about EVERYTHING! You reminisce, learn, dance,
soul
sisters
THIS MONTH, LKNW CELEBRATES SOUL SISTERS CARLY CORRELL AND BFF MICHELLE LOVE
sing, complain, celebrate, play, cry, and dream. Brought together by fate and kept together by love, Soul Sisters are forever yin and yang … from the
UNBREAKABLE
very first breath to the very last, they have each other’s back. JUST LIKE PEAS AND CARROTS
We truly enjoy each other’s company, and are more like sisters than mother/daughter! We have been told multiple times that our voices sound just alike. Even when I was young and we were living in the hospital with BJ, nurses would have to turn around to see which one of us was talking.
We’re mother and daughter and best friends! We’ve always been super close … we’ve been through a lot together. My big brother, BJ, passed away from cancer when I was just 11 … we miss him terribly. Another big challenge we faced was when Ma was trying to gain full custody of me. I struggled throughout my childhood because of the way my father treated me. I felt isolated from the world when I had to be at his house, and that feeling grew stronger when BJ was able to live with Ma after he was diagnosed. I had to follow this routine of undergoing my father’s emotional abuse for 10 years, until he gave up his right to spend time with me. Even though those 10 years were tormenting, I do not regret them. They shaped me to be the person that I am.
Do you and your BFF want to be featured in an upcoming edition of LKNW Soul Sisters? Email Leslie@lakenormanwoman.com.
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OUR HAPPY PLACE
We love the beach! I love to swim in the ocean and can easily spend the whole day in it. Ma loves to sit on the sand and take in the scenery. We also love to go shelling.
BIRTHDAY SURPRISES
On my 13th birthday, Ma and her best friend (my “second mom”) Cherie picked me up from school early and we went straight to the airport. We were going to Boston! That trip was so much fun … we saw many historical sites and ate at all the great restaurants – even at a castle! I found a new favorite dessert: ricotta pie. It was the best birthday ever! w
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family
LESSONS OF MILITARY OPERATIONAL SECURITY
APPLIED TO FAMILY SAFETY This month completes a two-part article that explores measures parents can take with their children and continues with measures parents can take on their own.
PART 2
in the April issue of Lake Norman Woman Magazine, having children prompted me to adapt security lessons I learned in the military to everyday living. This month’s blog builds on limiting social media content, being “rude” to strangers, limiting where you put your child’s name, and using passwords with your child. Family safety is important to everyone. It may seem abhorrent to discuss scary situations with our children – or with ourselves. Keep conversations honest and ageappropriate, just like fire drills. Knowing what action to take empowers us all to be strong, more secure, and less afraid. A S I S TAT E D
- Vary routines and timing. One of the basic forms of military operational security is to make it difficult for bad guys to predict where you are going and when you’ll be there. Vary your routine. Visit different parks at different times. When that’s not possible – like when we are going to school – be vigilant. In the military we say, “Stay Alert. Stay Alive.”
- Always keep your mobile phone with you and charged. Remember, 911 typically prefers you call from landlines, but mobile phones are still good alternatives to nothing – or to downed phone lines. Have them close and charged for when you need them.
-Perfect practice makes perfect performance. Without practice all the best laid plans won’t help you. Every athlete, actor, and public speaker knows your performance will live up to your practice. So practice realistically and practice with gusto.
- Shred your mail.
- Walk outside the wire.
While I was deployed to Iraq my soldiers laughed when I shredded the return address labels from my mail… until we recovered a bag full of U.S. addresses at the home of a Person Of Interest. Garbage on the curb is often legally considered available to anyone. It takes a moment to shred mail.
When preparing military defenses we walk beyond our perimeter, turn around, and consider how we would attack ourselves. Consider your home, online presence, and family routine as a “bad guy” might. What do security systems or baby cameras reveal? Can you determine which room your baby sleeps in? Focus cameras to what you need to see and no more. Where are the weaknesses? When is your house empty? A NYC cop once told me the best deterrent from routine home invasion is a dog – and they are adorable! I mean, they teach kids responsibility.
L K N e x p e rt
Ms. Richardson is a former military officer and owns Cygnal Consulting, LLC, a consulting firm focused on providing clients with processes, tools, and leadership for Project, Enterprise, and Emergency Risk Management. She is a graduate of the United States Military Academy at West Point, NY. The statements here do not represent advice or risk assessment.
© Kiattikhun Nilsophon | Dreamstime.com
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WRITER VANESSA RICHARDSON
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© Edward Olive | Dreamstime.com
health
NOT YOUR
MAMA’S ORTHODONTIST! Like really hard. And we don’t want to cramp your style. At Lineberger Orthodontics, we know the value of a beautiful smile. We see it every day in our patients. They leave our office with beaming, confident smiles to take on the world. That’s what makes our job worthwhile. One of the most popular options for teens is our self-ligating braces that come in both traditional and clear. With this revolutionary self-ligating technology, the metal wire is held into place by a moveable component instead of elastic ties. This allows your teeth to move more freely to provide a more comfortable orthodontic experience. It’s no secret: having a great smile can DRASTICALLY improve your life in more ways than one. Let us explore the many benefits of braces, shall we? B E I N G A T E E N I S H A R D.
L K N e x p e rt
Dr. Matt Lineberger and wife/ business partner Dr. Megan Lineberger own Lineberger Orthodontics with offices in Charlotte, Elizabeth, Huntersville, and Mooresville. Give them a call at 704.892.3300 or visit them today at www.LinebergerOrthodontics.com.
BENEFIT #1
You’ll rock newfound confidence. BENEFIT #2
Your dentist will love you. Aligning your teeth and jaws will make it easier to maintain proper oral hygiene. High five! BENEFIT #3
You’ll be able to eat easier and speak clearer. Sounds crazy, we know. But you’d be surprised at how much speaking and eating can be affected by a bad bite. BENEFIT #4
Braces prevent injury. Protruded teeth are so much more vulnerable to injury. By fixing your grill, you can help prevent your teeth from being broken or cracked. EEK!
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© Viorelkurnosov | Dreamstime.com
Another great option for our teen patients is Invisalign Teen®, which uses a series of clear, removable trays to straighten teeth. We are a certified provider of Invisalign Teen® in Huntersville and Charlotte. Invisalign Teen® allows you to straighten your smile without anyone even knowing! To find out which option would best fit your needs, request a FREE consultation! So what are the benefits of Invisalign Teen®? BENEFIT #1
Clear aligners are practically invisible BENEFIT #2
No food restrictions BENEFIT #3
Removable for brushing and flossing BENEFIT #4
Same cost as traditional braces (your parents will love this) So how does Invisalign Teen® work? We use some pretty awesome technology to make a 3D map of your teeth. The map is used to make a series of clear aligners. You wear each aligner for about one week and then use the next aligner in the series. It’s really, really simple. No special care is needed except for cleaning your aligners when you remove them to brush and floss. Most providers can correct bite issues, crooked teeth, and gaps with Invisalign®. You can expect the treatment time for Invisalign® to be between 12 and 24 months. And you should expect a SUPER AWESOME smile at the end! w
WRITER DR. MATT LINEBERGER
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go
A MOMENT OF APPLAUSE FOR THESE LKN MOVERS & SHAKERS
girls
Having just graduated from Mountain Island Charter School, KELSIE PAINTER will be attending Valdosta State University this fall. Dedicating much of her time to her church, Kelsie is an accomplished singer and would like to pursue singing professionally with her sights set on Broadway. She recently organized an acapella group called The Melodramatics, scheduled and coordinated rehearsals, taught the other singers their parts, booked performances at local venues and festivals, and created all the marketing pieces.
ON THE
FA N N I E X I A exemplifies
strong leadership skills and works well with others, showing kindness to everyone she meets. Last year she started a club at her school called ACE (Acts of Care and Empathy), and the club raised enough money to donate more than 100 teddy bears to Levine Children’s Hospital. This year the club is fundraising for a local pet shelter. She volunteers on her own time on weekends and organized a group of ACE members to volunteer at the local shelter as well. ZOE FITE’S
compassion and leadership skills have fueled her work with the Tim Tebow Annual Night to Shine, which provides a prom experience for people with special needs. Zoe serves as a Young Life leader and volunteer, and last summer she worked at Young Life’s Trail West Family Camp in Colorado. She is currently a teacher with Journey Church’s KidStreet; she is a Torrence Creek Reading Buddy, and regularly volunteers to help with InReach.
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North Lincoln Middle School student, LAURA GATES, is working to fulfill the requirements for her Girl Scout Silver Medal Project. Her desire to give back to her middle school band program is the basis of her project. To do so, she has constructed shelving and cubbies for the band room which will create storage space that is needed for the growing program. Rising 7th grader ELIZABETH KINCAID not only maintains honor-roll grades, but her extracurricular activities are impressive. In addition to being a member of an award-winning dance competition team at Rhonda’s School of Dance, she is a member of the Boy Scouts of America troop 70G! Elizabeth has made pillowcase dresses for Little Dresses for Africa, and at her church she started Paw Creek Rocks—a fund-raising initiative for Ronald McDonald House.
GRETA ROSE is a member of the Southern
Songwriters Association and performs all over the area, often for songwriter showcases, as an opening act for local independent artists or at area open mics. She released an album last October (Greta Rose Studio 13 Demos) and just recently won a scholarship to the Swannanoa Gathering where she will attend the Contemporary Folk Week music program.
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BE BUT
little,,
matter
Words are magic.
“
They actually change our brain
HOW WONDERFUL
chemistry! As
IT IS THAT NOBODY
wordsmiths here
NEED WAIT A SINGLE
at LKNW, we are
MOMENT BEFORE STARTING TO
especially fond
improve the world. ”
of words that will resonate with our readers, in hopes & inspire you.
Love yourself enough to set boundaries.
Your time and energy are precious. You get to choose how you use it. You teach people how to treat you by deciding what you will and won’t accept.” – A U T H O R A N N A TAY L O R
JUNE 2020
fierce.
–WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
“I can’t think of any better representation of beauty than someone who is unafraid to be herself.”
–EMMA STONE
–ANNE FRANK
they will help guide
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Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.” – M AYA A N G E L O U
image: Freepik.com
S D R O W
ALTHOUGH SHE
EXPERT ORTHO CARE 704.658.0956 Orthopedic Center
544 Brawley School Road Mooresville
You deserve to be free from bone and joint pain. From diagnosis to treatment to recovery, Iredell Orthopedic Center can help. Dr. Jason Batley is a board-certified orthopedic surgeon with experience treating everyone from weekend warriors to Olympic athletes. Whatever it is you want to do again, it’s time to get your pain out of the way. This is your health — don’t settle for anything but the best.
ACCEPTING NEW PATIENTS Scan the code to request more information.
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B E T T E R M E … B E T T E R YO U … B E T T E R W O R L D
MIND body spirit By mixing the ingredients of attitude and action, we can change the flavor of our own lives. Learn to nurture your body and soul to lead a more balanced life.
STRE T C H I N G
your mind, body, spirit
SPECIAL TEEN
EDITION!
Have you had a case of cabin fever lately? Many people at this time are more prone to boredom and need something different to do. Stretching your mind, body, and spirit is always a good idea, but it has even more meaning in today’s world. Here are some things to consider as you stretch your mind, body, and spirit: STRETCH YOUR MIND!
It is scientifically proven that stretching is good for your mind. Drawing is one of the many nourishing as well as fun exercises for your brain. You can either free draw or challenge your artistic skills by trying these: • Draw what makes you happy. • Limit yourself to three colors (you will need colored pencils, crayons, or markers for this). • Over-detail a simple drawing--- draw two identical sketches and then detail one of them. • Write your name in big, bold letters and then decorate with patterns or pictures.
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STRETCH YOUR BODY!
Many people work on being flexible. Even if you’re not a dancer, gymnast, or in any other sport, flexibility can be good for the body. It’s good to start slow and then to heighten the level of stretching you do every day. I am a figure skater and I started by looking up stretching videos for skating. This helped me a lot with my sport, helped me become more flexible, and even strengthened my body. Some easy stretches to get started are sitting in a crisscross position and reaching forward, doing the butterfly position, as well as putting one leg to the side and touching your toes. There are many other stretches too, and at some point you can make your own stretching routine that is good for you. Sometimes you may not even need a mat to stretch. You can be sitting on your bed, watching YouTube, or scrolling through Tik Tok while you’re stretching.
STRETCH YOUR SPIRIT!
Stretching your spirit is important, and there are many ways to do this. The term “stretch your spirit” does sound kind of silly, but it is a really healthy and fun thing to do. An example would be doing something nice for a neighbor. Maybe pick some wildflowers or roses in your yard or write them a card and give it to them. You can just leave it at their front door with a note of who it’s from if you’d like. Another idea would be to reach out to a family member you might not see or talk to very often and have a conversation with them over the phone or through FaceTime. It makes them and you so happy, and it’s nice to see and hear your great uncle or cousin from across the country. w
Grace Graham resides in Knoxville, Tennessee, and is a rising eighth-grader at Alcoa Middle School. An honor student, Grace is a Freestyle II figure skater and competes and preforms at the Ice Chalet, which is an endorsed rink by the Ice Skating Institute of America. Grace also enjoys her French and piano lessons, and on a warm day you will find her on the tennis courts or walking with her dog, Buttons. JUNE 2020
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WRITER GRACE GRAHAM