8 Daily Bar Buzz bar & restaurant daily deals 10 Weekly Bar Buzz island happy hour guide 14 the BarTab’s Tribute to Vodka 16 the Hoebee Gazette by bill hoebee 20 Key West Burlesque Extravaganza by marky pierson 29 Profiles dave sloan @ writter paul menta @ cuban coffee queen pip kean @ virgilio’s tony roberts @ musician 32 Map of Key West 40 Adventures in Bar Baby Sitting by leigh pujado 44 Restaurant & Bar Listings 54 Giving Thanks by mike marrero 57 Menus & Delivery Guide mr z’s & damn good food
PO Box 4951 Key West, FL 33041 www.KeyWestBarTab.com 305.292.6262 Publisher Lawrence Bradley, Jr firstname.lastname@example.org Assistant Editor Liz Love email@example.com Design David Rappe Words by Bill Hoebee firstname.lastname@example.org Leigh Pujado email@example.com Mike Marrero firstname.lastname@example.org Cecil Witt Contributors Photography Ben Besent The BarTab magazine is a free monthly publication distributed throughout Key West. Omissions in the BarTab are at the discretion of the publisher. All rights reserved & contents copyright 2004-2010, Flypaper Publishing, LLC.
218 Duval 305.292.0486
1128 Simonton 305.296.2807
505 Front 305.295.0501
all drinks 2-4-1 open-8pm 2-4-1 margarita all day
Happy Hour 4 - 7pm Food served till 12am or later
$5 bloody 11am-3pm Happy Hours noon-7pm Rum & Reggae w/ George Victory $5 mojitos all day
Live DJ Music w/ DJ Gyver 9:30pm - late
http://www.islanddogsbar.com/ http://bigunskeywest.com/ Bigâ€™Uns http://www.bottlecaplounge.com/ Bottle Cap Island Dogs
203 Duval 305.292.1903
528 Front 305.292.7862
Happy Hour 5 - 8pm 2-4-1 drink specials
Happy Hour 2 for 1 4-7pm wells, domestic drafts & bottles Live Music Tony Roberts 8pm
For a KeyWest Taxi call
Taco Tuesday 2 tacos & Milagro margarita for $7 Red Neck Latin Night Wednesday Rolando & $1 beer specials George Victory ladies $6 maritnis all night long! Blue Martini Ladies Night Thursdays Free Drink Specials $6 martinis for & Live DJ Music ladies 10pm - close
Live DJ Music w/ DJ Gyver 11:30pm - late
Live Music 9:30pm
Live DJ Music w/ Chaka 11:30pm - late
Celebrity Happy Hour for Charity 5-8pm
Live DJ Music 10pm - close
http://www.lazygecko.com/ http://www.rumbarrel.com/ Barrel Lazy Gecko Rum
Live DJ Music w/ DJ Gyver 11:30pm - late
DJ Dane Music 10pm - close
Live DJ Music 10pm - close
Live Music 8pm
524 Duval 305.296.8118
Live Jazz Skipper & friends 9:30pm
Rolando & Frito @ sunset
Live Music w/ Caffeine Carl 9:30pm
Rolando & Frito @ sunset
Live Salsa Music w/ El Caribe 9:30pm
Coconut Races! at sunset, come for a chance to win a bar tab!
Live Bands 9:30pm Live Bands 9:30pm
2-4-$10 Margaritas 2-4-$10 Margaritas 2-4-$10 Rumrunners Live Music at 3 & 7pm Margaritas 2-4-$10 Live Music at 3 & 7pm Margaritas 2-4-$10
SUNDAY EVERYDAY TUESDAY MONDAY
Summer Shrimp Spectacular 7pm $5 1/2lbs KW Pink Shrimp
Mojito Monday 2 for $12 Mojitos
$5 Martini Monday all martinis $5 8pm - close
Robert Albury @ sunset
Happy Hour 4-7pm 50% off premium well drinks & beers Sunday, Bloody Sunday 2 for $10 Bloody Mary’s
Robert Albury @ sunset
525 Duval 305.294.7674
Happy Hour 2 for 1 4-7pm wells, domestic drafts & bottles S.I.N Night w/ DJ Hov-around Yo Philly! Monday $3 Yuengling Pints $5 Absolut $9 Cheesesteaks S.I.N Night w/ DJ Hov-around Jammin’ Wednesday $3 Red Stripe $4 Cruzan Rum Irish Sessions 8pm-10pm Barrels of Fun Fri $7 Rum Barrels $7 Island Barrels $6 Dirty Hoes Irish Sessions 8pm-10pm
AND GRAB A COPY OF FOR GREAT ISLAND DISCOUNTS
0 Duval 305.296.7701
FOR A KEY WEST TAXI CALL FIVE 6’S CABS 305.296.6666
115 Duval 305.296.6609
Pouring $6 martinis, 6 nights a week. Tues-Sun get them 10pmclose at the bar
951 Caroline 305.293.5123
A mostly veggie restaurant open 11am-10pm Monday-Saturday pick up or delivery
Happy Hour 4-8pm, all drinks almost half off & great raw bar specials
Live Music Tuesday-Sunday 9pm-2am Drink Specials Daily w/ ping pong, corn hole & more!
601 Whitehead 305.294.6133
425 Greene 305.296.6420
509.5 Duval 305.294.7955
Kelly’s Caribbean 301 Whitehead 305.293.8484
Happy Hour 4-7pm daily with “sound-checks” at 5:30pm throughout the week
2 Happy Hours 4-7pm & 11pm-3am $1 off beers & well Food till 2am 20 beers on draft
Happy Hour open till 6:30pm, 2-4-1 margaritas & $2.50 pints of domestic beer. LIVE MUSIC A ALL DAY LONG!
10 High Def Projection TVs & personal speakers to listen. Late night food till 1am or later
Happy Hour 4-7pm $3 margaritas, $2 micro brews & 1/2 priced hot, mild, jerk or sweet & hot wings
Southernmost Beach Cafe
1405 Duval 305.295.6550
610 Greene 305.296.3230
Tavern & Town
3841 N Roosevelt 305.296.3676
BarTab’s favorite Key West steak house, with $5 martinis all summer long at the bar
3-way $3 Happy Hour 4-7pm your choice of wings, calimari, sliders & more $3 drink specials
Mon-Fri HH 4-7pm 1/2 priced apps 2-4-1 wells & beers 11pm-close All beer & liquor 1/2 price
Happy Hour Daily 2-4-1 drinks 5-7pm Tues & Thurs 2-4-1 Tapas 5-7pm
Key Lime Plaza Southard 305.296.5303
509 Southard 305.296.5515
Mix Grill Food Sandwiches, Wraps & more! 10am-6pm pick up or delivery
951 Caroline 305.296.4000
211 Duval 305.292.1262
The story is told that in 988ad the Grand Prince of Kiev in what is now Ukraine decided that it was time for his people to convert from their pagan ways to one of the monotheistic religions similar to the civilized countries to the south. First came the Jewish rabbis. He listened to their arguments, was impressed, but sent them away after remarking that the followers of Judaism did not control any land. Next came Moslem mullahs. Again he was impressed, both with their intellectual arguments & the success of Islam as a political & military force, but when he was told that Islam proscribed alcohol he was dismayed & sent them away. Finally came the Christian priests who informed him that not only could good Christians drink alcohol, but that wine was actually required for church rituals such as communion. That was good enough for the Grand Prince, & on his command his subjects converted to Christianity. The point being is that the Slavic people of the north & their Scandinavian neighbors took alcoholic drinks very seriously. The extreme cold temperatures of winter inhibited the shipment of wines & beers, as these relatively low-proof beverages could freeze during transit. The introduction of distilling into Eastern Europe in the 1400s, strong drink was made by fermenting strong wines, meads, & beers, freezing them, & then drawing off the alcoholic slush from the frozen water. The earliest distilled spirit in Eastern Europe was made from mead (honey wine) or beer & was called perevara. Vodka (from the Russian word voda, meaning water) was originally used to describe grain distillates that were used for medicinal purposes. As distilling techniques improved Vodka gradually came to be the accepted term for beverage spirit, regardless of its origin.
Here Here are are some some other other facts facts about about vodka: vodka:
Itâ€™s Itâ€™s produced produced from from grain, grain, potatoes, potatoes, molasses, molasses, beets, beets, & & aa variety variety of of other other plants. plants. Commercial Commercial production production of of vodka vodka started started in in Russia Russia as as early early as as the the 14th 14th century. century. Although Although vodka vodka is is commonly commonly thought thought of of as as being being made made from from potatoes, potatoes, in in Russia Russia most most vodka vodka is is made made from from wheat wheat or or rye rye & & vodka vodka made made from from potatoes potatoes is is considered considered inferior. inferior.
Vodka has more usefulness to it than just getting people inebriated. The next time you’re looking for an interesting solution to some of life’s little problems like running out of mouthwash or not knowing how to clean up vomit stains, then remember to try these out:
U Remove bandages painlessly, first saturate the bandage with vodka, which will then dissolve the adhesive.
U Clean bathtubs and showers, fill a spray bottle with vodka,
Add a splash of vodka to a bottle of shampoo. The alcohol cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair and stimulates the growth of healthy hair.
To treat dandruff, mix 1 cup vodka with 2 teaspoons crushed rosemary. Let it sit for 2 days, strain through a coffee filter then massage into your scalp and let dry.
Make your own mouthwash! Mix 9 tablespoons of cinnamon with 1 cup of vodka. Seal in an airtight container for 2 weeks. Strain through a coffee filter. Mix with warm water and rinse your mouth but of course remembering NOT to SWALLOW.
spraythe bath and shower, leave for 5 minutes and then wash clean. The alcohol in the vodka actually kills mould and mildew.
U Clean your glasses. Just wipe the lenses with a soft, clean
cloth dampened with vodka.
U Prolong the life of your razor blades by filling a cup with vodka and soaking your razor blade after shaving. The vodka not only disinfects the blade but also prevents rusting.
U Vomit stains? No Problem. Simply spray vodka on the stains, scrub with a brush, then blot dry. Use vodka on your face as an astringent. It cleanses the skin and tightens the pores.
Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your gums to absorb some of the alcohol to numb the pain. Treat earache. A few drops of vodka in your ear for a few minutes, then drained, will kill the bacteria causing pain in your ear.
U Fill a spray bottle with vodka and spray bees or wasps to kill them. Or just make them very drunk... hope they’re not mean drunks! A 1/2 cup of vodka and a 1/2 cup of water in a freezer bag when frozen, will make a reusable ice pack for aches, pains or black eyes.
Because Because vodka vodka is is high high in in alcohol alcohol content, content, itit doesn’t doesn’t freeze, freeze, making making itit the the perfect perfect beverage beverage for for chilly, chilly, eastern eastern European European countries countries where where itit is is the the dominant dominant spirit. spirit. Flavored Flavored vodkas vodkas were were produced produced from from the the beginning beginning & & became became aa showcase showcase for for the the distiller’s distiller’s vodkavodkamaking making skills. skills. The The first first popular popular vodka-based vodka-based cocktail cocktail in in the the United United States States was was called called the the “Moscow “Moscow Mule” Mule” & & was was aa combination combination of of vodka vodka & & ginger ginger ale. ale.
BY BILL HOEBEE I receive many emails everyday at my radio station, but recently I got one that caught my eye. It went something like this: “Mr. Hoebee, my wife and I live in Miami and are recently retired school teachers. We listen to your show every afternoon while having happy hour with our neighbors. We love your smart ass remarks about life in the Keys; with your stories about bums, drag queens, chicken problems, etc… We now read the Key West Citizen online and are amazed with how tame the stories seem after hearing your version. Are you embellishing them or do you know stuff the paper won’t print? “ So I wrote back “I never lie” and sent them a version of The Hoebee Gazette to give them a “backstage” look at what “really” happens here (back me up on this, ok?). The following are a short list of the headlines (faux!) I responded with: 18 KWBT
T H E
H O E B E E G
BEGGAR TURNS REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY INTO
PANHANDLING BONANZA The local beggar commonly known on the mean streets of Key West as “Thomas the Waffle Whiffer” has been setting the panhandling world on fire with his amazing money making abilities. His biting wit, poster making skills, and mastery of reverse psychology know no bounds. When asked how he stumbled upon this begging goldmine, Tom, with his usual cheerful attitude, told this reporter to commit unspeakable acts upon himself with a garden hose. I gracefully declined. Tom’s carefully worded begging signs pretty much say it all. The following are a few of my fave’s: “Don’t even think about throwing any of your HARD EARNED money in my derby, really don’t, unless you really feel like it.”
Tom poses this introspective question to his clients in his food begging coup de gras, “What are you going to do, carry those leftovers around all fucking night? I’ll take ‘em, but I’m not askin’”.And just when you think he’s done, he turns the sign around and it says “What am I, some kind of animal? How about kicking in a few bucks for cutlery and a beverage, you cheap bastard?” Or, “I’ll give you a hug for a dollar OR I won’t for $2”. Or the classic, “If you’re reading this sign you already owe me 10 bucks, but I’m in a good mood, so toss me a $5 and we’ll call it even.” Thomas is said to be considering spending some of his windfall on hiring the Little River Band and the Thompson Twins for a free concert in the park.
FACING EQUAL OPPORTUNITY LAWSUIT,
GAY GUESTHOUSE NOW
With legal bills and public pressure mounting, the national news-making Big Bucks Hitching Post Guest House has decided to offer straight guy’s lodging Monday through Thursday’s on a trial basis. Manager Leon Batfish said “We’re only doing this because they’re making us. We do hope that all straights will try to ‘gay it up’ a bit”. Batfish went on to explain that slightly undersized “Wham” and “Frankie Goes to Hollywood” t-shirts will be made available to straight party wreckers.
KEY WEST DUMPS
BAHAMIAN SISTER CITY Voters lined up this week to vote out Key West’s “sister city”, Green Turtle Cay in the Bahamas, saying “what the hell have they done for us?” in unison. Voters chose to make Kissimmee, Florida our new sister city, in an effort to get free 3 day passes to Disney World for all locals. If they turn us down we’ve decided to take Green Turtle back, but only if they take everybody who acts like a douche bag more than 5 times in any calendar year to live there.
HAITI TO HELP WITH KEY WEST
CHICKEN PROBLEMS, SENDING EMERGENCY VOODOO PRACTITIONERS TO HELP THIN THE FLOCK.
The Key West city commission is said to be voting this week on what’s being called the “Voodoo Directive” to get the growing wild chicken population under control. “We bring a lot to the table”, said Voodoo priest Jon Aki Buaa. “Our main objective is to sell t-shirts, do TV interviews and get folks to participate in our interactive website. Of course we also want to catch a lot of chickens at no cost to the city. All we want is a private ceremonial plot in the woods and your fowl problem will be eliminated quickly. We’ve got some big ceremonies coming up in the next couple of weeks so the chickens will come in handy for sacrifices and what not.” The vote is set for Thursday. Aki Buaa also stated that, “If anybody’s got a couple of goats they wanna get rid of we’d be happy to take them off your hands”. Happy New Year! Bill Hoebee
For more fake headlines tune into Hoebee in the afternoon on 99.5 & 103.1 from 2-7pm. Also, check him out as the host of Club Hour on KEY TV Channel 24. KWBT 19
Late Night at http://www.beachsidekeywest.com/
Saturday night 10pm – 12pm 2 for 1 drinks $5.00 Martinis $7.00 Wood Oven Pizzas open until 2am with Miami DJ and complimentary shuttle rides to Duval 1am – 2am 2 for 1 Cocktails Daily 5 - 7 pm 2 for 1 Tapas Dining Tuesdays and Thursdays 5 - 7 pm Live Entertainment Thursdays 5 - 7 pm Key West Marriott Beachside Hotel • 3841 N. Roosevelt Blvd. Reservations (305) 296-3676
Tavern N Town Ranked #1 Restaurant of all Marriott Hotels by Guest Surveys
The First Annual Burlesque Holiday Extravaganza takes over downtown Key West this January! STOLI Vodka & Key West’s own Marky Pierson & Tatah Dujour present a wild four day festival with two huge rip roaring glamorific shows with over 25 amazing performers from far away lands. The first annual event is co-produced with NYC’s hot impresario of nightlife, Jen Gapay of Thirsty Girl Productions. Shows unlike anything the town has seen will explode on the stages of Bourbon St. Pub & Kelly’s Caribbean. Iconic figures on the international burlesque scene will dazzle & amaze with performances so spectacular & diverse you may cry at the exquisite artisty. These Stars are so blazingly bright they have been seen on stages all over the universe with countless appearances on tv & film. Join Starlets Dirty Martini, Michelle L’amour, Julie Atlas Muz, Indigo Blue, Lily Verlaine, Trixie Little, Jo Boobs, Little Brooklyn, Tatah Dujour, Gigi Lafemme, Lux Lacroix, 24 KWBT
Roxi D’lite, Nasty Canasta, Minnie Tonka, Darlinda Just Darlinda, Ophelia Flame, Clams Casino, Harvest Moon, Cheeky Derriere, Anita Cookie & Moana Amour, as they dance & prance & tease as only a burlesque superstar can. The Holiday Extravaganza not only has three former Miss Exotic worlds & countless title holders- the show also has the hottest Boylesque performers in the galaxy! Reigning Mr. Exotic World - Hot Toddy will keep everyone randy while former Mr. Exotic World’s Tigger! co-hosts with Tatah Dujour & takes you places you never thought burlesque could go! What would a Key West Burlesque festival be without an Evil Hate Monkey, the Burlesque Mayor of NYCJonny Porkpie, the UK’s multitalented Seal Boy, & our home-town bad mo-fo Mr. Marquee Vonfister?! Would you also believe that Saturday night’s event is
hosted by the shmatlzy schmooze meister himself Mr. Showbiz- Murray Hill! This show will ‘blow mind’ says our French friend Magical Marie - & still there is more! In the event that gorgeous & talented dancers & performance artists stripping off their cloths is not enough to keep you entertained- we also have Miss Lily Vixxen & the Key west burlesque Superstars, NYC’s mad musical trio-Gigi & Pop, & DJ Momotaro to keep things perpetually rocking. It’s quite simply ridiculous to put this many out-of- this world performers in one festival but Key West Burlesque is quite simply out of their minds with incredibly entertaining & over the top ideas! All of this rhinestoned insanity means you win- & in a big way! If you think you can handle all of the extravagant festivities you will need to gear up to partake in two huge shows , 4 gigantic parties, Beach Blanket Bingo, a Super Secret Neekid Pool Party, a day sail with Danger Charters, & a Burlesque BBQ on the Beach! Got it all? Good-Now go to KeysTix.com & reserve your seats! 25
David Sloan LOVER, POET, DREAMER
BT: Full name, sign? David Livingston Sloan IV. I share a birthday with Buddha, so that would make me a Taurus. BT: When did you end up in Key West? D: My first visit was in ‘88. I was arrested for underage drinking within 10 minutes of arriving. I relocated in ‘96. BT: Why did you relocate? D: It was all about the ghosts. I was managing cruise ships & came up with the idea of a ghost tour. Key West’s dark history & sunny disposition made it the perfect location. BT: Tell us about your first job ever. D: I was a baker making $3.35 an hour. Hamburger & hot dog buns, cookies, cakes & pies. I was a mess at first. I nearly broke my arm in an industrial mixer. My fingers are still scarred from slicing bread. My forearms bear the marks of scalding hot sheet pans. They hired me because the previous baker, a narcoleptic, broke his wrist after falling asleep on the job. BT: What did you get for Christmas? D: Peace, Joy & Happiness. They were coming out of Teaser’s. I bought myself a Dremel. Someone put a porno flick in my stocking. I’m still hoping for a zebra print Snuggie. BT: Crazy life moment? D: The pig that wouldn’t die in Cuba, a Santeria ritual at Shine’s Ponderosa... I’ve set myself on fire a few times, that was pretty weird.
BT: Is there anything else you’re (perhaps secretly) “the best” at that people should know about? Darts? Ping-pong? D: Grilled Cheese, Key Lime Pie & food faces. The food faces http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2006676&id=1338756688 are posted on my Facebook if anybody wants to check them out. Grilled Cheese & Key Lime Pie are by appointment only. BT: What does David Sloan like to eat/drink/smoke? D: I trained under a crazy French chef who taught me the value of experimentation, so I tend to combine items most people wouldn’t. I have mastered the Grilled Cheese-Doritos sandwich. I drink Snake Bites & Miller Lite. I’ve been known to smoke the smallest, cheapest flavored cigars I can find. BT: What is your favorite part about Key West? D: Opportunity is everywhere. BT: If you could be the spokes man for any product, what would it be? D: Quit Your Job & Move to Key West & the other fine books from Phantom Press or Sham-Wow! They all leave you saying ‘wow’ each & every time.
Click here to read Dave’s entire article. www.keywestbartab.com/interviews/dave_v45.html
Paul Menta FROM CUBAN COFFEE QUEEN 284 MARGARET STREET
by Cecil Witt
BT: Full name, from & years in Key West? Paul Menta, Philadelphia, PA, 18 years. BT: Were you coming to Key West or running from Philly? P: A little bit of both. BT: Tell us a little bit about how you decided to open a coffee shop/sandwich shop/juice bar? P: When I first came here little Cuban coffee shops were everywhere. They’ve slowly closed down over the years & there aren’t that many around anymore. So we decided to bring back an authentic Cuban coffee shop. We use premium coffee & all of our sandwiches are made using actual slow cooked pork & the best ingredients. We don’t just use sliced lunch meat. BT: So that’s your ‘shtick’? You slow cooking everything? P: Yeah! I always say to everybody ‘Our best employees are our crock pots!’, because they work all night long. They work for 18 hours straight! They never want a raise! (laughs) We wanted to have a smaller place that we could control & be a part of. We want to keep our prices low - very low for Key West. BT: I noticed that you have a lot of fresh fruit drinks. P: Yeah, it’s really nice having the Waterfront Market right behind us. We can just run over & get the freshest fruit. All of our items are very traditional. The Cuban stuff is really Cuban ‘soul food’. We do it the way they did it in Cuba! I’ve been to Cuba many times, I love it there! I learned to cook all this
stuff from a Cuban lady in Valadero. She taught me how to slow cook the pork to get all the flavor that you can out of it. She also taught me how the make the authentic Cuban coffee. BT: Is that how you came up with the name ‘Cuban Coffee Queen’? P: It’s all about that lady & paying homage to her. She gave me several secrets that I think make all the difference. BT: So you guys deliver too? P: Oh yeah! It’s crazy busy with the deliveries. We’re definitely feeding a lot of the employees around town with the deliveries. BT: What dish really stands out? P: Well, everyone should try the Cuban Mix – it’s pretty lean & it’s delicious. Our breakfast sandwiches are great. We don’t use any type of grease or oils when we cook our eggs. We use Teflon pans so things don’t stick. So it’s great hangover food, even though it’s not ‘greasy’. The ‘Hangover Helper’ smoothie is a big seller here too!
www.keywestbartab.com/interviews/paul_v45.html Click here to read Paul’s entire article.
RESTAURANTS & BARS 1 BAGATELLE 2 BIG’UNS SPORTS BAR & GRILL 3 BLACKFIN BISTRO 4 BOTTLE CAP 5 CAROLINE’S 6 CUBAN COFFEE QUEEN 7 DANTE’S / PRIME STEAKHOUSE 8 EL ALAMO 9 FINNEGAN’S WAKE 10 GREEN PARROT 11 IGUANA CAFE 12 IRISH KEVIN’S 13 ISLAND DOGS 14 JACK FLATS 15 KELLY’S 16 LAZY GECKO 17 LOBO’S MIXED GRILL 18 MR. Z’S 19 PRIME STEAKHOUSE / DANTE’S 20 RUM BARREL 21 SOUTHERNMOST BEACH CAFE 22 SPORTS PAGE 23 SUNSET PIER 24 TAVERN N TOWN 25 VIRGILIOS 26 WILLIE T’S 32
STORES & SERVICES 1 DIAMOND INTERNATIONAL 2 FAIRVILLA MEGASTORE
5 GHOST TOURS STORE
3 FAST BUCK FREDDIES
6 HALF BUCK FREDDIES
4 FURY WATER SPORTS
7 JACK STEWART AUTO REPAIR
8 KW HAMMOCK CO.
11 PIRATE SOUL
9 PARADISE TATTOO
12 SCHWARTZ PROPERTY
10 PEPPERS OF KEY WEST
13 SEACOAST AIRLINES
www.furycat.com KWBT 33
FROM VIRGILIO’S 526 DUVAL STREET
by Cecil Witt BT: Full name, sign, years at Virgilio’s? P: My name is Pip Kean. Sagittarius, about 5 years.
BT: Where did you work before? P: I was at Rumrunner’s upstairs, the strip club, Teaser’s, for 10 years. BT: How did you get the nickname “Pip”? P: My parents started calling me “Pip” because I was really little, & it’s kind of a shortened version of my real name. BT: Judging from your accent, what part of Australia are you from? (laughs) P: Really? I’m from just outside of Birmingham, ENGLAND! BT: What’s it like over there? P: You couldn’t pay me to move back, but it’s a great place to go visit. It used to be the second largest city in England, until Manchester took over. It’s a very industrial town. BT: When did you come to the States? P: I came November, 1992 with someone to visit friends for a 3-month vacation. I missed my plane home by 2 weeks! So, I took it as a sign that I should just stay! BT: Really, two weeks? P: (laughs) Yeah, it’s easy to lose track of time when you’re having fun! BT: What do you like about living in Key West? P: It’s very laid back, relaxed, close-knit community. I like that a lot of people that live here are from all over the world. 34 KWBT
BT: What makes Virgilio’s stand out from other bars? P: The comfortable atmosphere, great bands every single night of the week. You can dance, you can get fantastic food from La Trattoria. We serve food in Virgilio’s till close too. You can kick back & have a nice martini. The staff is a large part in why someone goes somewhere & we have a great staff! BT: Who do you think can drink more – your staff or the Irish Kevin’s staff? P: Ohhh – ya know, my staff is really well behaved & they don’t do that kind of thing much, so Irish Kevin’s would probably be able to out drink us. (laughs) BT: What would you recommend for food & drink to somebody that came in to see you? P: My favorite drink is the Macchiato Martini. & I would recommend the Ossobuco, the lamb chops & carpaccio to eat. BT: Any shout outs? P: I want to give a shout out to my mom! And you can be sure to see Pip shout any weekend night or at $5 Martini Monday from 7pm-2am or later.
Click here to read Pip’s entire article. www.keywestbartab.com/interviews/pip_v45.html
Tony Roberts FROM THE TONY ROBERTS BAND
BT: Full name, from & years in Key West? TR: Anthony Kahlil Roberts, named after Kahlil Jibran, Boston, MA, & I’ve been coming down here since ’99, but lived here straight since Wilma. Whenever that was. BT: How did you break into the Key West music scene? TR: I moved down here with the guitar player from my old band. The first place we got regular gigs was at Willie T’s. We were mostly doing originals so at first we had a very hard time getting gigs. But after a while you get your local fan base. BT: Did you come here on vacation or to play a show? TR: My old band used to come down here on tour. I guess the first shows we did down here were at Schooner Wharf. BT: Do you remember your first Key west gig? TR: Not really. Schooner Wharf in ’98, maybe ‘97. I don’t really remember it, like a lot of gigs (laughs). BT: Biggest influence musically and/or in life? TR: I don’t know about life, but probably my mom. Musically it’s just good solid song writers; Bob Marley, Bob Dylan, Ben Harper. Those types, guys that are writing good songs that actually have some value beyond commercial aspects. BT: Last year you were nominated for no Grammys. How does that make you feel? TR: Makes me feel very unspecial (laughs). What’s the word I’m looking for? Just makes me hungrier for next year’s Grammys. 36 KWBT
BT: What does Tony Roberts like to eat/drink/smoke? TR: Let’s see. Chicken like stuff for the eating. Fizzy type stuff for the drinking. Greenish colored things for the smoking. BT: Why do you play? TR: It’s just in me. I’m lucky enough to be able to do gigs & get paid for it & have people buy CDs - but I’d do it regardless. It’s just one of those things. I’ll do it till the day I die. BT: Any albums out or coming in the future? TR: Yeah, I have a brand new one, “Long Lost Ocean Blues.” The release party is this month, but the albums available now. BT: Where can people go get it? TR: They can get it now on my website, TonyRobertsMusic.com, or they can download stuff off iTunes or any of the download sites & after the New Year it’ll start being in stores around Key West. By February it should be in coffee shops & different little surf shops & stuff like that. Tony Roberts CD release party is Saturday & Sunday, January 16 & 17th at the Rum Barrel, 528 Front Street, 8pm. No cover.
www.keywestbartab.com/interviews/tony_v45.html Click here to read Tony’s entire article.
Island Dogs Bar http://www.islanddogsbar.com azul Wednesdays
Key West's premier upscale latin night Live Music Rolando & George Victory Ladies Drink $6 Maritnis
Blue Martini Thursdays
Live DJ - Top 40 House Ladies Drink $6 Maritnis Happy Hour music with Mark Lum
505 Front Street, Key West, FL 305-295-0501
I like children. Really, I do. They taste like chicken! But that doesn’t mean I want them sitting at my bar. Still, many people feel the need to repopulate the planet and they will, at some point, attempt to bring their little procreations into your bar. Children make horrible bar customers for several reasons: 1. They’re too young to sell alcohol to. 2. They generally come with a lot of space consuming things like strollers, diaper bags and toys. 3. They make undesirable noises and smells. And most importantly: 4. They’re shitty tippers. After years of dealing with other people’s children I have
By Leigh Pujado
adopted my own set of rules which I will gladly share with you. Before you employ any of my baby-sitting techniques, be sure to check with management and know your company policy on children. It is with great conviction that I believe children should never be allowed to hang out at a standalone bar. By “standalone bar” I mean an establishment that sells booze and no food. There is no purpose for them to be there for any length of time, no financial incentive for management to cater to them and many social and legal reasons not to have them there at all. Now before the hate mail floods to my inbox, please understand that there are rational exceptions to this “no kids” policy. A parent who stops by with their child in tow to briefly chat with a bar employee or patron is seldom a problem. Nor is the family that is just passing through, grabbing a drink to go and
BAR-BABY-SITTING 40 KWBT
kids. Many of them came to the bar to get away from their possibly making a potty stop in the restroom. But there own children for an hour or so and the last thing they want is something gravely wrong when Mommy or Daddy is to do is get stuck with somebody else’s children. bellied up to the bar while Junior runs amok, de-felting the pool cues, picking peanut shells up off the ground Many families don’t understand the invisible wall and terrorizing the unsuspecting adults. The scenario between the bar and the restaurant. Moms and Dads are begs the question, “How crappy of a parent are you to simply dog tired and it’s possible that they need a cold think that this is an appropriate place for your child to beer and a comfy seat more than any other customer you hang out?” And if you can’t afford a baby-sitter, then will encounter. Get those moms and dads a cold drink as you can’t afford to be out drinking! quickly as possible, make Shirley Temples for the kids, and then get them to a table! The best There are certain bars that do a “Much like a way to keep kids off your barstools great deal of their business in food is to be direct and polite. Try stating sales rather than just liquor and these Chuck E Cheese or the giant, this little white lie: types of places often allow kids at infl ated jumping castle at the the bar. In this case, families should “I’m sorry. We have a house rule fair are sacred kid havens, bars that all persons seated at the bar most certainly be welcomed at the establishment, but it has always been must be at least 21. But let me get are sacred adult havens” my feeling that kids should be seated you and your family a table.” at a table. First and foremost, bars are an adults’ This statement chases the little boogers away and playground, a place free from the pressure of being a role simultaneously welcomes them to a nice table. Next, go model with adult responsibilities. Much like a Chuck E hunt them down a nice server and go back to your nice, Cheese or the giant, inflated jumping castle at the fair clean, kid-free bar and be glad you won’t be the one are sacred kid havens, bars are sacred adult havens. I who has to clean up peanut butter and cheerios an hour don’t get to roll around in the room filled with thousands from now. of plastic balls nor do I get to jump around in the giant blow- up castle. Kids don’t get to play on our bar stools. Having kids seated at your bar will make some customers uncomfortable. People come to bars to drink, to smoke, to curse and to fornicate. The presence of kids puts a damper on this grown-up play time, and bar people generally don’t want to sit next to other people’s
Hate e-mail: email@example.com (Please note that all letters received defending a parent’s right to drag their kids to the bar will be forwarded to the Department of Children and Families.) 41
801 Duval, 294 4737
The front bar is the locals’ hangout. Drag shows upstairs at 9 & 11pm, bingo on Sun. In back, Saloon 1 is not for the timid or faint-hearted. 4 TVs (w/ porn)
915 (NINE ONE FIVE) 915 Duval, 296 0669
Med–New American tapas menu with a tuna dome that can’t be missed. One of the finest wine lists in the Keys with ample indoor & outdoor seating.
ABBONDANZA 1208 Simonton, 292 1199
Warm & comfortable Italian restaurant that’s favored by locals. Enjoy your experience while seated on their comfy couches w/ loads of pillows.
ALONZO’S 700 Front, 294 5880
One of the best views & great 4-6:30p happy hour. Stay after for a top rate menu & seafood selection.
1401 Simonton, 293 0304 BarTab’s favorite sushi dig. Great bar, lounge & restaurant. The new look may be a bit much to some die hard fans, but they are still serving up some of the best sushi in town. 44 KWBT
615 Duval, 294 6565
This amazing Italian restaurant is one of Duval’s fi nest. 100s of wines by the bottle & original Italian menu creations daily. Lunch Mon-Fri 11am-2p & dinner every night at 5p with TK at the bar.
AQUA 711 Duval, 294 0555
Mixing dance club w/ live shows Tues - Sun @ 9p. Karaoke - Mon @ 8:30, Texas hold em’ Sat @ 4pm, Sun 3 & 6p. HH: everyday 3–8pm, $3 wells & $2.50 domestics.
ART BAR 901 Caroline, 296 0424
Join them in their ‘Secret Spot’ ~ The BIG BACK DECK, for movies, performance & fun! A unique shopping (& drinking) experience!
AZUR 425 Grinnell, 292 2987
Michael & Drew have opened what is to be one of Key West’s hot restaurants. Breakfast at 8a Mon-Fri with lunch till 2. Dinner 6-10 Mon-Sat. Brunch on Sundays.
BAGATELLE 115 Duval, 296 6609
Hide from the beer chugging contests of Duval & request your favorite martini for $6 after 10p from Nate or Laurie at the bar.
BANANA CAFÉ 1215 Duval, 294 7227
Breakfast or lunch all day. Catch a burger at 9am, or try their crepes until they close at 4p (5p on weekends).
Bar & Restaurant Listings Listings appear in alphabetical order. if you would like to update, change or add a listing, please contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org Cheers!
1029 Truman, 296 3979
The name says it all. Opens at 4p w/ happy hour on pretty much all drinks till 8p. Nightly drink specials after that.
BEACH BAR @ the Pier House 01 Duval 296 4600
Stop by for lunch or just sit Oceanside at the bar & soak in some of their island drinks. Ask about their live music.
700 Front, 294 5880 Feeling swanky? Go upstairs at A&B Lobster for one of the best menus in town. Great view of the harbor. & the only cigar bar in town.
BETTER THAN SEX
411 Petronia, 296 8102 Erotically charge atmosphere, sporting dishes like Jungle Fever & Missionary Crisp. Open Wed-Sun, 6pm-midnight.
BIG’UNS 218 Duval, 292 0486
Food served all day & till 4a. Bar stays open late night. Live music around sunset & DJ rule late night 5 days a week. Back bar with games & 4 pool. 15 TVs & 4 projection TVs.
BLACKFIN BISTRO 918 Duval, 509 7408
Bustling bistro with fantastic outdoor dining. Offers savory bistro cuisine with a true key-west flare. From breakfast inside with a view of Duval to late night on their back deck & Garden Bar, this is the spot!
✆ reservations recommended U upscale F food served G food served late S sports
Cats & chickens living in harmony & an award winning wine list which complements extraordinary food.
BLUE MOJITO 601 Front
At the Hyatt, plenty of waterfront couches to chill on. Get a little sun or hang in the shade. Light food served from daily & offering 20% locals’ discount.
BOBBY’S MONKEY BAR
900 Simonton, 294 2655 One block off Duval, activities provided through the week. Karaoke 9p Mon, & Wed - Fri. Tues 7p pool tourney. HH noon-8p on beer & wells.
BOGART’S 900 Duval, 296 0637
Escape Duval Street in this east-side bar. Kick your feet on one of their couches. Mix w/ the Key’s Irish implants. 2 TVs, 1 pool, juke tunes
BOURBON STREET 724 Duval, 294 9354
The ultimate guys only night out. Porn on TV, dancers on bars, & pool w/ waterfall. Mon is movie night & 2-4-1 Tues. 16 TVs (2 big, 3 w/ porn)
BOTTLE CAP 1128 Simonton, 296 2807
Cool lounge design & a rock n’ roll twist, live music Thurs, DJ Music Fri & Sat., Great Food till 1 AM, New pool room w/ Aaron & Steve tendin’. Happy hour noon to 7 p. Carolyn doing Friday charity happy hours.
BULL & WHISTLE 224 Duval, 296 4565
Live music all day, everyday. Get 2-4-1 margaritas (or one large) at the bar or grab a table & ask Lynn or Vicky for Debbie’s award winning Bloody Maria!
THE CAFÉ 509 Southard, 296 5515
Mostly vegetarian entrees, sandwiches & awesome veggie burger. Organic wines & specialty beers & herbal teas. Open daily Mon–Sat & brunch on Sunday 9am-3p. Delivery or take out.
CAFÉ SOLÉ 1029 Southard, 294 0230
A few blocks from Duval & some of the most authentic cuisine this side of Paris. Fine wine, sherry & ports.
1202 Simonton, 296 4811 A locals’ favorite w/ a menu that changes daily. Serving a fantastic breakfast, lunch & dinner. HH 4-7p. Opens 8am-10pm(ish).
CAROLINE’S 310 Duval, 294 7511
This totally outdoors bar/restaurant is awesome. Great for people watching. Marc & the lovely Bethany in command. Delivery available. 2 TVs
CPS SPORTS BAR 908 Kennedy, 294 4818
Hidden in the minimalls of new town, this is an escape from the clubs on Duval. HH 4pm-8pm, 13 TVs, 3 pool
O outdoor seating M entertainment L open late W
on the water
729 Thomas, 296 8666
1 Duval, 296 4600, ext 477
One of Key West’s oldest. Tucked inside the Pier House, opens at 4p w/ $3 Bacardi. 2 TVs
THE COMMODORE 704 Front, 294 9191
On the harbor walk, come to experience their spectacular creations. Stop in the lounge & have a nip on a Frost Bite. Open 5:30p.
CONCH REPUBLIC 631 Greene, 294 4403
This open-air bar offers dozens of rums & then some. Plenty of seats at the bar, w/ live music every night. Be sure to ask about the rum sampler.
CONCH TOWN TAVERN
3040 Roosevelt Previously the Esquire lounge & located next to the CT liquor store, this is a great New Town hang out. Awesome prices, 2 pool tables & Sa slingin’ drinks.
CROW’S NEST 208 Duval, 296 4890
Here’s your sanctuary within the walls of Rick’s. HH: Sun–Thur 124am, Fri & Sat 2-4a. Or just watch bands from above. Opens @ 9p. 2 TVs
CUBAN COFFEE QUEEN 284 Margaret, 294 7787
200 sq ft located roadside in front of Waterfront, offering you essential smoothies, coffees & sandwiches to get your day started right. Open 6:30a with delivery.
A alternative lifestyle
Pool side drinking & dining for people of all ages. HH Mon-Fri 4-8p w/ all drinks almost half price & raw bar specials everyday with Jo, Allison & Tiffany. 15 TVs
DONS’ PLACE 1000 Truman, 296 8837
Closed only 3 hours, 6 days a week. Opens 7a & stays open till 4a. 10 TVs, 1 pool, 1 dart, 1 GT, juke tunes.
DUFFY’S 1007 Simonton, 296 4900
Specializing in Steak & Lobsters. Open for lunch & dinner, this is a great place to bring the family for a night out. Try Duffy’s special coffee rum.
DURTY HARRY’S 208 Duval
Duval’s hidden sports bar encased in the back of the Rick’s complex. At night the TVs become secondary as bands that take the stage. 15 TVs
EL ALAMO 4 Charles, 517 6350
Key West’s newest music venue. Drink specials all day & $1 draft offered. Plenty of drinking friendly games to play. Music Tues-Sunday 9p-2a.
EL MESON DE PEPE’S 410 Wall, 295 2620
Some of the best Cuban in Key West & located on Mallory Square w/ live music daily. Dishing out the strongest Mojito this side of Cuba.
EL SIBONEY 900 Catherine, 296 4184
When your pockets are feeling light, Siboney can at least keep your belly full with great Cuban food at extremely reasonable prices.
FAT TUESDAY 305 Duval, 296 9373
“Home of the World Famous Frozen Drinks” direct from New Orleans placed conveniently on Duval. Ask for your tooter as well. 8 TVs, 1 pool.
FINNEGAN’S WAKE 320 Grinnell, 293 0222
Probably the best draft selection in the lower keys & a sweet outdoor patio. You can get served food here till at least 1a.
FLAMING BOUT FILET CO. 1100 Packer, 295 7970
Fresh dishes & local seafood served daily. The Lobster Mac & Cheese is a must. Dine in or take out with delivery as well. Open 6p Tues-Sunday.
227 Duval, 294 7525 A slew of local & tourist friendly bartenders. The back bar is a haven for locals at night. Lunch & dinner at great prices. 20 TVs (8 in A/C!)
GRAND CAFÉ 314 Duval, 292 4740
Proving to be an outstanding decision for lunch &/or dinner. Serving one of the best menus in town, plus mojitos & the Grand Margarita.
951 Caroline, 293 5123
1107 Duval, 296 1020
This wine shop & bar is a great place to start or end an evening. Buy a bottle, then head to the porch for a table. Vin pours wine by the glass & a few beers.
GREEN PARROT 601 Whitehead, 294 6133
Probably the biggest anchor in town. The best live acts in the Keys w/ Pat, Beav & Jim who make slinging drinks look as easy as drinkin’em. 4 TVs, 2 pool, 1 dart.
GUY HARVEY 511 Greene, 295 0019
Huge sound system, two bars, even bigger aquariums. Playing live local & out of town music. Stop by to see original Guy Harvey art.
HALF SHELL RAW BAR 231 Margaret, 294 7496
Great raw bar on the harbor walk. Great bar to kick a few back & relax. Local’s favorite every hour. Happy hour 4:30-6:30p.
HARD ROCK CAFÉ 313 Duval, 293 0230
The Key’s very own Rock & Roll museum w/ a multi-level patio bar & restaurant. Plenty of Key West Hard Rock goods available, too. 9 TVs
6810 Front (Stock Isl.), 293 4041
Housing live music Thurs-Sun while chowin’ on their Hogfish sandwich. Breakfast Sat & Sun at 8a. HH 4-7p Mon-Sat. 4 TVs, 1 pool
✆ reservations recommended U upscale F food served G food served late S sports
Catering to the tourist crowd & also remains a favorite of locals. Hosting some of the best bands in town. 6 TVs
HOT TIN ROOF 0 Duval, 296 7701
Check out the lounge & ask Sheila & Zack about the Hot-Tintini. Sit back & take in the beautiful mahogany bar. Opens at 6p. Sheila & Zack pourin’ martinis.
HURRICANE HOLE 5110 Overseas Hwy, 294 0200
At Hurricane Hole Marina, across the Stock Isl. bridge. A haven for locals to hang out on the water. Sunday brunch w/ full liquor bar. Happy hour 4-7p everyday.
IGUANA CAFE 425 Greene, 296 6420
Rolling out a revamped breakfast menu, serving food 8am2a (or later) steps away from the 200 block of Duval. Home to over 20 drafts & a full liquor bar. Open 7 days a week.
3850 N. Roosevelt, 294 9986
Located at the Holiday Inn, Kahoot serves breakfast all day & has HH from noon-7p. Game room for the kids or you once your buzz is on.
Watch Guinness chugging contests on stage, accompanied by live music all day long. Great new draft system with over 25 flavors! Dave & Heath behind the bar keeping you sloshed.
211 Duval, 292 1262
ISLAND DOGS 505 Front, 295 0501
Serving up $3 Bacardi mojitos everyday, all day. Wed is Latin night with an upscale twist. Blue Martini Thurs gets ladies $6 martinis. Food served until 3a or later in a plush bar & lounge setting.
509 1/2 Duval, 294 7955 Get your face here on game day or chill with the cool bar staff the rest of the days. Doug & Matt represent late night. Great grub served to 1a or later. 38 TVs (10 huge)
303 Whitehead, 293 8484
outdoor dining area to enjoy Key West’s days & nights. HH 4-7p on drinks & wings at the bar. Try one of the micro brewed beers poured by Christopher, Doug, Jenny & Erica.
1114 Duval, 294 8859
UFOML Listen to some of Key
West’s & NYC’s best performers at this Duval Street piano bar or relax outside at the Keys outdoor patio. Opens everyday at 5p.
KWEST 705 1/2 Duval, 292 8500
Shows nightly at 10p. Guys, amateur night is on Sat (w/ $2 Bud & Bud Lts.), think you got it? 2TVs (1 flat w/ nude show). HH open–8p.
LA TE DA
1125 Duval, 296 6706 Outside full liquor bar. Shows in the Crystal Room & piano bar. HH 12-7p on beer, wells & wine.
O outdoor seating M entertainment L open late W
on the water
400 Front, 296 4222
524 Duval, 296 1075
Probably the Keys’ best Italian! Classic cuisine & impressive wine list. The street side bar is perfect to sip on libations w/ Erin & Kathy.
LAZY GECKO 203 Duval, 292 1903
Corey, Rey & the chicks throwin’ the best party! Ladies drink free Thurs 12-4a. Redneck Wed w/ $1 beers. HH 5-8p (till midnight Sun & Mon). 11 TVs (10 flat)
LIGHT 422 Appelrouth
Your escape for late night DJ tunes. Happy hour 10p-1a, beers & drinks 2-4-1. Live DJ playing the best dance music, electronic, techno & house every night.
LOUIE’S BACKYARD 700 Waddell, 294 1061
Hang out ocean side on the After Deck & sip on some of Louie’s passion. Lunch 11:30a & dinner 6p.
MANGIA MANGIA 900 Southard, 294 2469
Fresh seafood homemade pasta everyday & the keys most famous pesto. Great outdoor garden to dine it. Offering over 400 different bottles of wine. Open 5:30p daily, no reservations accepted.
MANGOES 700 Duval, 292 4606
Located at the corner of Duval & Angela, Mangoes has a very classy & relaxing dining patio complete w/ an outdoors bar. Open 11am-1a.
A alternative lifestyle
MICHAELS 532 Margaret, 295 1300
Located in the back streets of Old Town, this is a Key West favorite. Owner & Chef Michael Wilson offers a classic menu w/ an island twist.
423 Duval, 305 292 0486 Old Town’s largest selection of beers — both domestic & imports. Cheapee’s offers a wide variety of liquors & wines to suit every taste and every price range.
501 Southard, 305 296 4445
LF Grinders, pizza,
& the best Cheesesteaks in Key West! Open till 4a every night, just a half block off Duval. See their menu on page 51.
OLD TOWN MEXICAN CAFÉ
609 Duval, 296 7500
Passive ethnic décor enhances your Mexican experience. Beer & wine w/ a handful of Mexican beers, but we opt for the pitchers of sangria.
ORIGAMI 1075 Duval, 294 0092
Offering a highenergy sushi bar & an plenty of outdoor seating, coupled w/ astounding sushi. Beer & wine as well as a large supply of sake. 48 KWBT
PEARL’S 525 United, 292 1450
The Distinctive Resort for Women in Key West. Poolside bar & food served. 2 blocks from the Southernmost Point. HH Mon-Sat 5-7p.
PISCES 1007 Simonton, 294 7100
Pisces has received awards from Zagats & AAA 4 diamond & original Warhols on the wall. Open at 6p & reservations recommended.
915 Duval, 296 0669 Elegant but not extravagant, Pt5 is situated about 915. Marble
top bar & 2nd story balcony. Pouring a variety of beers & wine in a very unique setting.
PRIME STEAKHOUSE 951 Caroline, 296 4000
This tucked away gem is located upstairs from Dante’s. Serving $5 martinis at the bar all summer long, plus their upscale steak & seafood menu is complemented by a excellent wine list.
RED FISH BLUE FISH 407 Front, 295 7447
Serving some of the best seafood in town. Steps away from Mallory Square, great pre & post-sunset destination with $5 margaitas everyday. Latin Dance Party Saturdays at 10p.
RED GARTER 208 Duval, 296 4890
Slim pickings on Rick’s dance floor guys? Go towards Durty Harry’s & duck into the Garter to see all of the beautiful ladies of Rick’s.
917 Duval, 295 0111 European style restaurant nicely settled on upper Duval. Saturday night various DJs play lounge tunes 10pm-1a with 1/2 price well drinks from 1011p. Great menu & street-side lounge.
208 Duval, 296 4890
Hormone-fueled crowds dance to DJ’s spinning dance melodies at 8p w/ 2 decks above Duval. Downstairs offers laid back live music. Karaoke every night. Fred & Spencer on crowd control.
ROOFTOP CAFE 308 Front, 294 2042
Great deck overlooking Front St. Live music playing regularly with a great martini list. Opens at 10:30a.
528 Front, 292 7862 Here is your Eagles’ & Philly’s Southernmost headquarters. Sweet upper deck with outdoor pool table & live music on weekends. 10 flat HD TVs. More than 100 rums poured by Jodi, Jay & Casey.
RUM RUNNER’S HOUSE
1117 Duval, 296 2680 Open till 1a or later. This rum & cigar bar has a walk-in humidor & plenty of cigar selections. Full liquor bar & HH 4-7p.
708 Duval, 517 6212 Cuban fare in the on Duval. Serving breakfast, lunch & dinner.
628 Duval, 292 1865
Best authentic Mexican food in Key West! Eat chips & salsa till you can’t anymore. Open Tues-Sun 11am10pm, 11p on the weekends.
✆ reservations recommended U upscale F food served G food served late S sports
Get to Higgs Beach for a terrific beach front treat. A casual atmosphere dishing up lunch & dinner. HH 4-7p w/ $1 off drinks. Opens 11:30am
SANTIAGO’S BODEGA 207 Petronia, 296 7691
Enjoy a unique dining experience. With over 30 tapas style dishes & great wine. Escape the crowds at this cozy restaurant in the heart of Bahama Village.
202 William, 292 3302
Spacious marineside bar where the din of local chatter & live music fills the air. See the only Bar Magician in the Keys. 2 TVs, 1 pool
3101 N. Roosevelt, 294 8600
Steak, chicken & seafood. All you can eat shrimp or Mahi Mahi for $11.95 all day. Opens at 11:30a with covered dock side dining.
623 Olivia, 296 2777
Nestled in Key West‘s the sleepy back streets, 7 Fish has become a favorite for “locals in the know”. Eclectic menu w/ emphasis on local catch.
SHANNA KEY 1900 Flagler, 295 8880
Great selection of ales & great Irish food served till 3a. You can always find Barry & Peter up for a drink. 7 TVs, 1 GT ‘06, internet juke tunes.
1000 Atlantic, 292 1117
Savor million dollar bay views and delicious cuisine with the freshest catch from land and sea in this extraordinary new Key West restaurant.
SLOPPY JOE’S 201 Duval, 294 5717
With enough entertainment from people watching alone, but they also complement it w/ live music all day. Check out the their Backroom Saloon.
SOUTHERNMOST CAFÉ 1405 Duval, 295 6550
This beach side restaurant braves the morning to serve breakfast. One of the few bars on Key West w/ a beach. Chair rentals & $3 food & drink happy hour 4–7p. 5 TVs
UFOM Enjoy yourself at this
610 Greene, 296 3230 local watering hole. Guaranteed 15 min lunch Mon-Fri. Food till 3a & 2 HHs daily. 2-4-1’s 4-8p & half priced drinks 11pm-1a. 6TVs, 3
1075 Duval, 296 4300
In Duval Square plaza, w/ a menu of largely American-style seafood. Try Patrick’s “Monkey Nuts”. B&L served 11am–3pm, Dinner starts at 6p.
STICK N’ STEIN
1126 N Roosevelt, 296 3352
SL Housing over
80 TVs, 4 bowlingo lanes, 10 pool tables, 6 Golden Tees, this could be the entertainment capital of Key West. 50 KWBT
0 Duval, 296 7701
This could be the beginning or end of your Duval crawl. A great place for sunsets, try the Monkey Love or a Funky Fish cocktail. Stephen Marley Feb 27th.
TAVERN N TOWN
3841 Roosevelt, 296 3676 Rated the best restaurant & bar in the US by Marriot guests. The T&T has a 2-4-1 happy hour everyday, plus on Tues & Thurs 2-4-1 tapas at the bar.
218 Duval, 292 0486 Now moved slightly, the new Teaser’s has slick lighting & sound system. Plenty of girls hanging out all night
long. Grey Goose VIP room available.
430 Duval, 296 2991 Seven stories above the Crown Room, best known for their sunset view. One of, if not the best sights in Key West. Full moon party every month.
231 Margaret, 294 2640 This harbor front restaurant serves a smokehouse fare w/
breakfast 7-11a. Awesome view at the TK tower bar. Great sunset view w/ HH 4-6:30p.
700 Front, 295 5222
Featuring Key Lime martinis w/ graha cracker rims poured daily. Beer, liquor & wines, available to-go as well.
WILLIE T’S 525 Duval, 294 7674
Late night menu with panini, pizzas & more. Peggy serving 31 flavors of mojitos & happy hour 4-7p with 50% off premium well drinks & beers. Mojitos Monday 2-4-$12. Bands take the stage throughout the week @ 7p & Fri & Sat @ 3p & at 7p.
WINE GALLEY PIANO BAR One Duval, 296 4600
One of Key West’s newest additions, specializing in wine & martinis. Ladies night on Tuesday & happy hour all night, every night. A perfect spot to sneak away with friends or to find new ones.
WORLD’S SMALLEST BAR 124 Duval, 294 8507
The world’s smallest bar lives up to its name. Blink & you might miss it. This place stays open late night on Duval.
VIRGILIO’S 524 Duval, 296 8118
601 Front, 809 4000
The backyard of La Trat becomes the best late night, upscale martini bar. Great patio, this classy bar has live jazz music Wen & Thurs, rotating bands Fri & Sat & DJ’s late night & becomes home of the $5 martini every Mon night!
✆ reservations recommended U upscale F food served G food served late S sports
clothes, hoisted up our mangy mutts & had a blast making them. We sent off 40 of the fuckers. For the most part people got a kick out of them, or at least a little cubancoffeequeen.net/ccq/ chuckle. My girlfriend got a few concerned relatives wondering, “What the hell their little angel’s doing down there in that Devil’s den?” That aside, I would call them a success & a new Christmas tradition is born. by Mike Marrero The year is finally over, & given the year we’ve had its easy stomp our feet, throw our little boy (or girl) hands in the air & pitch a fit. Not only would it be easy, it would probably feel pretty fucking good. I say Bah Humbug! That’s the pussy way to go. Nothing in this world is easier than self-pity & negativity. Give yourself a challenge & try to find the humor in the little things. Take my Christmas card at right, for example. Sure, my lady & I could have rented a kid & posed next to the ol’ tree in our best holiday sweaters, but what fun is that? Why not make people feel weird & piss off one of your decrepit aunts as a bonus? With that in mind I set off to recreate, in my own twisted way, the SEARS style family portrait I used to take when I was a kid. Remember the type? It usually involved standing in front of a backdrop with a babbling brook, never mind the fact that I grew up on a tropical island. So, we rustled up some bad 54 KWBT
This brings me back to my point: it’s all about the little things and, yes, I know that is a cliché, but between the school board shenanigans, a summer that averaged 185 degrees, a slow season, an even slower off season, making about three dollars a week, Harris school selling for about 4 bucks, Conch Trains still going 3mph in Old Town even though there is just a single Japanese tourist… Deep breath… Get it together… That’s better…. Where was I? Right! Holiday joy & giving thanks. Alright, back on track… so instead of bitching & moaning I’m going to give thanks to the small things that bring me joy, make me smile & make me forget about all the bad shit, if just for a few short moments. Drinking a thick stout at Berlins on the one day of the year it’s actually cold. Having my dog pee on Santa’s lap at the Dog Park. Chad & Steve of Digital Island Media winning a motherfucking Emmy. Taking a Bike Ride with my lady & looking at palm trees decorated in Christmas lights. Buying a 70¢ shot of Cuban Coffee, sprinting to the
bathroom & then watching my hands shake for a good 45 minutes. Stock Island cause it’s hanging tough like a booger. Making the semi-finals in Bocce & then watching Babalu’s lose to bunch of scallywags in the quarterfinals. Even though the average temp this Winter seems to be about 95 degrees at least my corn hole isn’t frozen shut in -50 degree weather like the rest of the country. No Hurricanes. That would have been the straw that broke the camels back. Hurricane Specials – September is now my favorite culinary month of the year when all the great eateries start offering insane specials. My favorite is probably the “give me whatever you got in your pocket” special at Azur. That David Sloan took out the power during Fantasy Fest. He is slowly becoming the new Captain Tony. Raining down dollar bills as a 2’ 10” Midget Stripper climbs the pole like a spider monkey at Teaser’s. Singing a 45-minute version of the 12 Days of Christmas with the MARC House on their Xmas trolley ride. The fact that I call one of the most laid back, openminded places in the world Home. It may not be Paris but it sure the fuck ain’t Lincoln, Nebraska either (no offense to the corn huskers). I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Michael Marrero is a photographer, writer, artist & creator of weird ass Christmas cards. You can view his work at www.marrerostudio.com
When You’re Hung Over, Think of us. Our drivers will deliver a Single Coffee, Con Leche or Hang-Over Helper Smoothie. We also have Egg and Cheese, Cuban Mix, Club Sandwiches and Rice and Beans. So relax and stay in bed. Let us do the work!
305.294.7787 284 Margaret St. (next to Waterfront Market) Open 6:30 am • 7 days a week
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ROLL-UP SANDWICHES MONSTER VEGGIE $7.25 Jack & Swiss, packed with veggies & Dill Dressing
Grilled Portabello Mushrooms, Tabouleh, Jack, Onions, Lettuce, Tomato & Basil Mayo
Smoked Turkey Breast, Jack, Bacon, Avocado, Scallions, Lettuce, Tomato, Honey Mustard
Turkey Breast, Stuffing, Cranberry Sauce, Onions, Lettuce, Basil Mayo
Baked Ham, Swiss, Pineapple, Lettuce, Tomato, Onions, Horseradish Sauce
Select Fried Oysters, Cheddar, Bacon, Lettuce, Onion, Tomato, Basil Tartar Sauce
SPICY SHRIMP ROLL
Crispy Fried Shrimp, Jack, Onions, Lettuce, Tomato Avocado, Wasabi Sauce
Roast Pork, Baked Ham, Turkey Breast, Lettuce, Tomato, Onions, Dill Pickle Slices, Mustard & Mayo
Crispy Fried Fish, Cheddar, Tomato , Onions, Baby Greens, Key Lime Tartar
RIB EYE ROLL-UP
Sliced & Grilled Marinated Steak, Jack Cheese, Onions, Mushrooms, Lettuce, Tomato, BBQ Mayo
Flour tortillas, filled with cheddar & jack, grilled until golden brown with sour cream & salsa
SPINACH & CHEESE
Blue Cheese Crumbles, Applewood Smoked Bacon Lettuce, Tomato
Our homemade tortilla chips smothered with melted cheese & served with sour cream & salsa on the side
JERK CHICKEN NACHOS
The same as above, but add our grilled jerk chicken breast
with Lettuce, Tomato & Pickle
Jack Cheese, Avocado, Sprouts Lettuce, Tomato, Spicy Chipolte Mayo
with Bacon, Avocado & Scallions
with Mushrooms & Onions
Ground fresh daily, hand molded & formed into half pound patties and then cooked to order. Truly the best burger in Key West!
CHEFâ€™S, CURRIED CHICKEN, DILL TUNA or BASIL CHICKEN served with your choice of Bleu Cheese, Italian, Honey Mustard, Caesar, Ranch or Vinaigrette
choose American, Cheddar, Jack or Swiss $ 6.50
MAKE YOUR OWN BURGER Choose any combination Substitute a Morningstar Veggie Burger or Chicken Breast! See our entire menu at:
www.LobosKeyWest. com www.LobosKeyWest.com www.loboskeywest.com Now Delivering Beer & Wine! Eat In, Take Out or FREE DELIVERY in Old Town
Fries $2 small $4 BIG Onion Rings $4.50 Cheddar Stuffed Jalapenos $5
Appetizers Tex-Mex Rolls 7.95 Egg Rolls w/ spicy Chicken, Corn, Black Beans, Cheese & Onion Redenbacher Shrimp 9.95 Bite sized Shrimp fried golden brown, with Cocktail Sauce Tomato Lovers’ Bruschetta 7.95 Baguette, w/ Tomatoes, Garlic, Mozzarella, & Balsamic Vinegar Quesadillas Chicken or Shrimp 8.95 w/ Jack & Cheddar, Peppers, Onions, Tomatoes & Jalapenos Buffalo Style Chicken Wings 7.95 Mild, Medium, or Hot with Celery & Bleu Cheese Dressing
Fresh Green Salads The Bittersweet 9.95 Endive, Arugula, Gorgonzola Cheese, Candied Pecans, & Spring Lettuce in a light Vinaigrette Caesar Salad 7.95 add Chicken or Shrimp 9.95 Macon & Bacon 9.95 Crispy Fried Chicken, Roasted Corn, Sweet Onions, Crunchy Bacon, & Maple Georgia Pecans, with Romaine Lettuce, & our own Home-style Ranch Dressing Southwestern Chicken Salad 9.95 Grilled Chicken, Roasted Corn, Black Beans, Tomatoes, Tortilla Strips, & Cheddar & Jack Cheeses, in a Spicy Lime Dressing
Sandwiches served with French Fries. Delivered sandwiches served with Potato Chips. Cajun Blackened Chicken Sandwich 7.95 Cajun Chicken w/ Cheddar, Lettuce, Tomato, Onion & Spicy Mayo Caroline’s Famous Fish Sandwich 9.95 Fresh Fried Golden Brown with Lettuce, Tomato & Tartar Front Street Club 7.95 Turkey, Ham, Provolone, Bacon, Lettuce, Tomato & Mayo Cuban Mix 8.95 Pork, Ham, Bacon, Pickles, & Mustard on Grilled Cuban Bread Rev. Joe’s Burger 8.95 The BIGGEST, the BEST, served with Lettuce, Tomato, Onion add Bacon or American, Provolone, or Cheddar $1 each
Caroline’s Favorites Chicken Broccolini 13.95 Grilled Chicken Breast, Penne Pasta, & Fresh Broccoli, in a creamy Parmesan/Romano Sauce Kingston Chicken 15.95 Spicy Marinated Jerk Chicken with Rice, Black Beans, & fried Plantains (Breast & Wing with Bones) Spicy Cajun Jambalaya 16.95 sautéed Shrimp, Chicken, & Andouille Sausage, Peppers, Onions, & Tomatoes, over Rice