Rochester Woman Online's July/Aug 2025 Edition

{ TABLE OF CONTENTS } REGULARS

20

Heidi Lyndaker

54

WOMAN WHO INSPIRES

Dr Sharitta Kittles (Gross)

80 COVER STORY

HER STORY HER POWER

Brooke Monteneri

ON OUR COVER TT

Dear Readers,

Welcome to the latest edition of Rochester Woman Online! I could not be more thrilled to share with you another issue packed with stories of strength, transformation, and inspiration from incredible women in our community.

Gracing our cover this month is the amazing Heidi Lyndaker—a woman whose journey from corporate America to becoming a leader in health, wellness, and selfdefense is nothing short of remarkable. Her story is one of resilience, passion, and the courage to follow her purpose, and I know it will inspire so many of you.

Inside, you’ll also meet an extraordinary lineup of women who continue to make waves in their fields and beyond. We celebrate Mrs. New York America 2025, Christina Fantizi, who opens up about her pageant journey, family, and what this next chapter means to her. You’ll be introduced to Donnell Adler, our “Queen of Arts,” whose creative vision and bold artistic spirit are as captivating as they are empowering. We also spotlight Kassy LaBorie, “The Trainer’s Trainer,” a dynamic force reshaping how leaders, trainers, and professionals engage and connect in today’s world. And we dive into the inspiring work of Dr. Sharitta F. Kittles (Gross), who is helping transform lives with her expertise, compassion, and drive.

As always, Rochester Woman Online is more than just a magazine—it’s a community. We’re excited about the incredible upcoming events we have planned, from networking evenings and expos to fashion shows and fundraisers. These gatherings are opportunities to connect, collaborate, and celebrate the power of women supporting women.

Thank you for being part of this journey with us. I encourage you to not just read, but to engage—join us at an event, share your story, or collaborate with our growing platform. Together, we are building something truly extraordinary.

Please be sure to Like & Fllow Us on Facebook, INstagram and Linkedin

Kelly BreuerPublisher, Rochester Woman Online

Heidi Lydaker was photographed by Brandon Vick

Photography at her home in Western NY.

{ A LOOK AT OUR TEAM }

PUBLISHER

FREELANCE EDITOR

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PHOTOGRAPHY

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Kelly Breuer

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Brandon Vick

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CONTRIBUTING WRITERS

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Lisa Wagner

Ian Love

Lori Murphy

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Veronica Ryan

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Clianda Florence

Christine Piacentino

Lori Bruton

Trina Alessi

Christine Conte

Kaitlyn Vittozzi

Kassy Laborie

Heidi Lydaker

Christina Fanitizi

Fabiola Aquilera

Dr. Sharitta Kittles (Gross)

Tina Myers

Donnell Adler

Brooke Monteneri

Trish Mock

Sally Davidson

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Kelly Breuer

Network Rochester

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HEIDI LYNDAKER

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

When corporate America lost Heidi Lyndaker, the wellness world gained a force of nature. Her career began in psychology in New York City, where she saw how diet, especially sugar and food dyes, could dramatically affect children’s behavior. But it wasn’t until a severe health crisis left her unable to swallow even water that Heidi truly understood the body’s power to heal. Refusing a lifetime of prescriptions, she took her health into her own hands—researching, learning, and ultimately curing herself.

That breakthrough became the foundation for Synergy Health and Wellness, where Heidi blends psychology, nutrition, herbalism, martial arts, and energy work to help clients heal physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Her approach is personal, integrative, and rooted in the belief that everyone has the ability to reclaim their health and confidence—at any stage of life.

PHOTOS BY BRANDON VICK PHOTOGRAPHY

What inspired you to leave corporate America and pursue your passion in health, wellness, and self-defense full-time?

My journey into integrative health and wellness began with my experiences as a psychologist in New York City. I saw firsthand how diet—particularly sugar and food dyes—impacted children’s behavior. It was heartbreaking to watch parents feel as though medication was their only option. At the same time, I was working as a personal trainer and

and told I’d be on it for life. That didn’t sit right with me. Instead of filling the prescription, I went home, researched, and healed myself. That experience changed everything—it showed me the body’s innate capacity to heal, this sparked my desire to pursue further education and help others reclaim their health in ways that honor the body’s intelligence and individuality.

Can you share the story behind founding Synergy Health and Wellness?

Driven by a deeply personal loss, Heidi also teaches self-defense across the country, empowering people with both safety skills and self-assurance. Whether she’s guiding someone through chronic illness, hosting a retreat, or leading a workshop, Heidi’s mission is clear: to help others find their strength, trust their bodies, and transform their lives from the inside out.

Personal & Entrepreneurial Journey

kickboxing instructor and constantly asked for nutrition advice. I realized that simply sharing my own vegetarian lifestyle wasn’t a truly personalized or inclusive approach and learning to understand the intricacies of human physiology and functional blood chemistry held the key.

The turning point came when I developed severe GERD (Gastroesophageal Reflux Disorder). At 33, I found myself unable to swallow, even water. I was given a prescription

Synergy Health and Wellness was born from the understanding that healing is never onesize-fits-all. My personal healing from GERD and my professional background in psychology, fitness, herbalism, nutrition, and energy work came together in a mission to support others through holistic, personalized care. The name Synergy embodies my belief that true wellness emerges when the mind, body, and spirit are in alignment—and when diverse healing modalities are combined in a way that enhances their collective impact. We often tell ourselves that ‘it’s genetic,’ especially when we see our parents or relatives suffer from the same conditions. Or we assume that aging inevitably means decline and discomfort. I’ve come to learn—and now teach—that these beliefs are not absolute truths. While genetics and age can influence our health, they don’t dictate our destiny. I’m passionate about helping others understand that

“First and foremost, I believe the true authority in the room is the client. No practitioner or expert can fully know or understand someone’s body better than they do themselves.”

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

with the right tools, awareness, and support, lasting change is not only possible—it can change our lives and make play possible at any age.

How did your personal experiences shape your holistic philosophy toward healing and healthcare?

I know firsthand what it’s like to live with daily pain—to view food as the enemy, to struggle with a debilitating condition, and to feel as though my body was broken. For a long time, I held onto the story that ‘it’s just my body,’ as if it were inherently flawed. I experienced intense abdominal pain that would leave me curled up, unable to walk, and heartburn so severe it would stop me in my tracks. These experiences have given me a deep sense of empathy and a strong commitment to helping others break free from those limiting narratives and reconnect with their bodies in a more compassionate, empowered way. Healing from GERD without medication helped me understand that if our bodies can move into a diseased state—often a result of prolonged stress— they can also return to balance when given the right support. I now work from that foundation, using personalized combinations of nutrients, botanicals, movement, stress management, and emotional-spiritual care to help clients restore their body’s natural state of healing. The body is always trying to heal even when it appears from the outside to be failing us.

What challenges did you face in transitioning from employee to entrepreneur—and how did you overcome them?

The transition was humbling. Wanting to help people doesn’t automatically mean you know how to run a business. There was a steep and constant learning curve. Thankfully, I was surrounded by fellow wellness practitioners also building their own practices. We shared resources, ideas, and support—it was that sense of community that helped me navigate the most uncertain moments of entrepreneurship. I struggled at times with feeling isolated, not having co-workers, and missing the daily interaction. I consider myself lucky, I’ve had wonderful clients, and mentees, and now collaborate on projects that fulfill that sense of connection.

What does success look like to you today, and how has that evolved?

When I first began my practice, I measured success by external milestones— clients following protocols, meeting prescribed goals, and returning for regular appointments. Initially, my ego was a third party in every consult. Over time, that definition and my approach as a clinician evolved. Today, I see true success as helping individuals reconnect with their bodies—guiding them to tune in, listen, and respond in ways that support sustainable, long-term wellness. Success is when a client no longer needs me, because they’ve learned to understand their symptoms as meaningful messages from the body—and can respond to those messages with confidence and care. Similarly, as a Certified Nutrition Specialist supervisor, my early focus was on how much knowledge I could pass on. Now, I find deeper fulfillment in witnessing a shift within my mentees— from relying on clinical expertise alone

to embracing curiosity, presence, and empathy. Watching them evolve into practitioners who understand that being fully present, listening deeply, and creating a space where clients feel seen and heard can be just as therapeutic as any supplement or dietary intervention— that’s where I see real transformation. It’s not just about what we prescribe; it’s about how we show up. That’s the future of healthcare I strive to cultivate.

Health & Wellness Expertise

You have an incredibly diverse and impressive background — from nutrition and psychology to martial arts and herbalism. How do you integrate all of those into your client work? Thank you — I appreciate the acknowledgment. Each of these disciplines—nutrition, psychology, martial arts, and herbalism—are simply tools that work synergistically. I don’t see them as separate fields, but rather as complementary approaches that allow me to take a truly holistic approach with my clients.

For example, my background in psychology helps me recognize behavioral patterns and sources of motivation, which allows me to meet clients where they are mentally and emotionally. My training in nutrition builds on that by offering practical, evidence-based dietary guidance—while staying sensitive to the emotional attachments, cultural influences, and potential resistance people often have around food. Herbalism adds another layer of natural support, particularly for areas like stress, digestion, and immune health.

{

“ I often draw on the WISDOM of Bruce Lee, who said, ‘Be like water, my friend.’

That mindset— ADAPTABILITY, flexibility, and resilience—has become a GUIDING principle in how I help clients navigate their health and HEALING journey.”

“For a long time, I held onto the story that ‘it’s just my body,’ as if it were inherently flawed.”

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

Martial arts has instilled in me the values of discipline, patience, and presence. I often draw on the wisdom of Bruce Lee, who said, ‘Be like water, my friend.’ That mindset—adaptability, flexibility, and resilience—has become a guiding principle in how I help clients navigate their health and healing journey. I weave these elements into my sessions through movement, breathwork, and mindset training, creating an integrated approach that supports the whole person.”

Ultimately, the integration happens through listening closely, understanding what would be most supportive for each individual, and drawing from the right combination of tools to support their goals—physically, mentally, and emotionally. It’s a personalized approach that honors the complexity of each individual.

What sets Synergy Health and Wellness apart from traditional practices?

First and foremost, I believe the true authority in the room is the client. No practitioner or expert can fully know or understand someone’s body better than they do themselves. Second, I trust in the innate wisdom of the body. Over millions of years on this planet, we have not outsmarted its ability to adapt, regulate, and heal. As my late mentor, Bob Duggan, often said, traditional models are predicated on the assumption that the body is dumb—rather than recognizing that it is constantly working behind the scenes to return to a state of balance and homeostasis. My work is rooted in honoring that intelligence and teaching clients to reconnect with it. Additionally, I focus on truly individualized care. That means no templated treatment plans

or generic protocols. Instead, I dive deep—into symptoms, environment, relationships, and lifestyle—connecting the dots to support the body’s own healing capacity. It’s a collaborative process grounded in science, intuition, and the understanding that no two people are the same. While the current trend in wellness emphasizes “getting to the root cause,” the reality is that we may never fully uncover it. Rather than spending valuable time chasing down a singular explanation, I believe in focusing on what we can do—supporting the body’s innate capacity to heal. That means helping clients develop more effective ways to manage stress, inspiring positive lifestyle changes, expanding their palate, and encouraging movement that builds strength, enhances flexibility, increases circulation, and leads to better mobility. The goal isn’t always to find a definitive cause, but to create the conditions in which healing becomes possible.

My work with disordered eating takes a sharp departure from the conventional model, which too often results in relapse. Rather than focusing narrowly on calorie intake, I emphasize education, mindset shifts, the language we use, and the internal narratives we cling to. I help clients build awareness around their stress responses and explore how past trauma may be shaping current behaviors. In this context, healing is not about restriction or excess—it’s about deepening the understanding of one’s relationship with food, emotions, and self.

How do you help clients decode what their symptoms are telling them? It starts with asking questions—lots of them. Symptoms are messages, and my

job is to act like an investigator: when does it show up? With whom? After what kind of food? On what days? At what time? Assumptions have no place here. For instance, “headache” means something very different to each person.

One may experience it only after poor sleep, another after stress, another due to environmental triggers. My role is to uncover the full story behind a symptom and guide clients in developing greater awareness—teaching them to stay present, notice bodily sensations, and remain curious. It’s about helping them shift their narrative from one of problems and pathology to one of possibility and potential for healing. I also help clients begin to recognize when they are in a state of ‘upset’—a term I use to describe heightened physiological arousal in response to emotional stress. Our bodies don’t differentiate between emotions like fear and anger; what they do register is the need to adapt. This might involve circulating more oxygen, increasing heart rate, or shutting down digestion. When someone lives in a near-constant state of upset or fails to recognize the signs of chronic, learned stress responses, they may unknowingly remain in fightor-flight mode—ultimately leading to dysfunction and disease.

By creating awareness around this concept, exploring our own personal ‘wise teachers’ (the body’s signals), and learning how to intercept these patterns, we can begin to send the body a new message: ‘I am safe.’ This simple yet powerful shift can support symptom relief, improve regulation, and promote long-term well-being.

“Wanting to help people doesn’t automatically mean you know how to run a business. There was a steep and constant learning curve.”

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

Why is a functional, individualized approach so critical today?

Because no two bodies are the same—and never have been. Wellness must reflect the person, their history, their body, and their life context. Our physiology is as unique as our fingerprints, and our healthcare should reflect that.

How has your telehealth model expanded your reach and impact across the country?

Telehealth has truly been a gamechanger. It’s allowed me to work with clients and CNS candidates across the country—many of whom come to me through referrals from family or friends in other states. It’s also opened the door to working with individuals in areas where access to integrative or functional approaches is limited.

I’ve even had the opportunity to supervise candidates internationally, including someone in Saudi Arabia. That experience was especially rewarding, as it gave me insight into their health culture and broadened my own perspective as a mentor.

Ultimately, telehealth has created greater access and flexibility for clients and candidates alike, while still allowing me to provide personalized, intentional care and mentorship. It’s helped my practice grow in a way that’s both meaningful and aligned with my values.

Self-Defense & Empowerment

Tell us about the moment that changed everything for you — the tragic event that sparked your mission to teach self-defense.

In 2016, a dear friend and colleague was brutally attacked and murdered by a stranger on Christmas Day. The shock and grief was overwhelming. Not long after, I found myself walking the streets of Washington, D.C., noticing how many women were unknowingly putting themselves in vulnerable situations. I felt compelled to honor her life by sharing the skills I had developed over years of training in and teaching martial arts. My hope was to increase awareness and empower others with practical, effective easy-toremember techniques that could one day save their lives. It became a way to turn grief into purpose—offering tools for self-protection, confidence, and awareness in a world where those qualities are often essential.

What was it like teaching your very first self-defense workshop?

It was emotional, triggering, and incredibly powerful—and, to my surprise, also a tremendous amount of fun. Despite the gravity of the topic, I was able to bring a sense of playfulness to the experience, which felt deeply aligned with Tricia’s spirit. She was a determined, vibrant, and playful woman, and honoring her in this way felt profoundly meaningful. What struck me most was realizing how often people’s natural instincts can actually increase their vulnerability. Teaching others how to avoid danger, de-escalate situations, and respond effectively became a calling I could no longer ignore.

You travel around the country teaching workshops — how do you adapt your training for different

audiences and groups?

I always consider the group’s needs— age, physical ability, and environment. For example, seasoned adults like those in assisted living facilities, who aren’t as physically active, I focus on practical, effective techniques, and having a heightened awareness of factors that could increase vulnerability. I also tailor training to regional risks and settings —urban vs. rural, college campuses vs. real estate showings.

What do participants usually walk away feeling after a self-defense workshop with you?

Empowered, confident, and capable. Many want to take the class again— not just for the skills but because they feel inspired seeing someone my size fiercely embody those skills. I’ve had many students take up martial arts after class, and years later, participants still remember what I taught them. Some have even shared how they’ve used the skills to evade potential attacks, which reinforces the importance of this work and continues to fuel my commitment to making it accessible.

Can you describe the most powerful moment you’ve witnessed while leading one of these workshop?

Every time I watch someone who arrives timid or reserved walk away standing taller, using their voice more confidently, it moves me deeply. That transformation is everything—it shows my work is making a difference. There is nothing quite like the witnessing camaraderie and the sense of empowerment fostered during these classes.

“Synergy Health and Wellness was born from the understanding that healing is never onesize-fits-all.”

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

Mind-Body Connection & Holistic Healing

How do you incorporate mindfulness and meditation into your practice?

I often recommend condition-specific breathing exercises, guided meditations, and mindful eating practices tailored to each client’s needs. Whenever possible, we practice a suggested technique together during the session, which not only increases confidence and understanding but also helps clients integrate them more effectively into their daily lives. I find it to be more helpful to review techniques together rather than adding to a clients to do list.

You’ve studied both psychology and therapeutic herbalism — how do these disciplines support your clients emotionally and physically?

Psychology allows me to understand how past experiences and emotional patterns contribute to physical symptoms. Herbalism adds another layer, offering plant-based support customized to the client’s physiology and emotional landscape. I use personalized herbal formulas that consider both the person’s constitution and the plant’s energetics.

As someone who’s deeply attuned to the body’s signals, how do you help clients break old patterns and build new habits that stick?

It starts with curiosity—tuning into symptoms rather than judging or suppressing them. I help clients recognize the stories they’re telling themselves: “That’s just how my body is,” or “I’ve always been this way.”

Those stories block healing. My own healing began when I stopped believing that GERD was “just my digestion.” I realized I didn’t have to live that way—and that mindset shift changed my life. People often believe change is difficult, I teach them that change can happen in an instant - the moment they decide to embrace a new way of being sparks a shift. New habits are much easier when we hold each other accountable, choosing a person for who can be that support, check in with them on progress or meet up for a walk supplies motivation and can make embracing wellness more enjoyable.

Community, Teaching & Vision

What does empowerment mean to you—in life, business, and healing? Empowerment means listening to your intuition and honoring your lived experiences—every joy, every pain, every lesson. It’s not a fixed destination; it’s a state you can access whenever you need it. True empowerment comes when we stop outsourcing our decisions, especially about our bodies, and begin trusting ourselves—even if that means walking a rockier path.

What’s one common misconception about holistic health you’re working to change?

That holistic health is anti-conventional medicine. It’s not. In fact, some of the most powerful outcomes come when the two are combined. Botanicals can complement chemotherapy; supplements and sound therapy can enhance surgical recovery. Guided

meditations and superfoods can prepare the body for procedures. Psychedelic therapy can lead to the reduction of psychotropic medications. My hope is to see integrative care become the norm—where healing is faster, gentler, and more effective.

What advice would you give someone just starting their wellness journey and feeling overwhelmed?

Start by tuning out the noise. There’s too much information and no one person can know it all. Instead, follow your curiosity, keep an open mind, and use common sense. I once asked Dr. James Duke—a renowned herbalist who worked for the USDA for over 30 years studying medicinal herbs— a question about a plant in his garden, and he responded, “I don’t know.” That humility reminded me that true wisdom lies in remaining curious and always being open to learning. You don’t need to have all the answers to get started. Be patient with yourself and recognize that wellness is a journey—just like life, it comes with its ups and downs. Progress isn’t always linear, and that’s okay. What matters most is showing up with intention, acknowledging your efforts, and being open to the process

How do you maintain your own wellness routine while serving others so intensively?

Like anyone, I fall off track. I know the formula that works for me—early morning workouts, hydration, nature, rest, connection, play, gratitude—but when life gets busy, it’s easy to drift. What’s important is giving myself grace and getting back on track without

“The name Synergy embodies my belief that true wellness emerges when the mind, body, and spirit are in alignment—and when diverse healing modalities are combined in a way that enhances their collective impact.”

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

judgment. I try to care for myself the way I would guide a client—with compassion.

I never claim to be perfect, we are all perfectly imperfect beings. True health isn’t being the fittest, or having a perfect diet, if it was up to me cheese fries would be a food group. Rather than striving for perfection, I measure wellness by qualities like resilience, adaptability, flexibility, humor, and self-kindness. These are the traits that help us navigate life’s challenges with grace and perspective.

Outside of work, I nourish my spirit through home renovation projects— yes, I’m known to “pimp out” my skills when it comes to redesigning old homes with a blend of modern amenities and old-world charm. I also seek adventure wherever I can find it: riding my dirt bike, paramotoring, skiing, hiking, 4-wheeling, foraging, gardening, practicing martial arts, and soon—learning to paraglide. These passions fuel my creativity, ground my wellness practice, and serve as a powerful reminder to keep joy, movement, and curiosity at the heart of everything I do.

to be surrounded by other amazing friends and professionals in the wellness space. We share ideas, collaborate on projects, and support one another. Hosting events and retreats gives people the opportunity to connect—and often, to realize they’re not alone in their struggles. That sense of shared experience is deeply healing.

Future & Vision

November. Alongside these events, I plan to continue to teach self-defense workshops, collaborate on monthly sound baths and cooking classes, and supervise candidates pursuing their Certified Nutrition Specialist (CNS) credential.

Currently, I’m enrolled in a nutritional psychiatry fellowship, which will further strengthen the work I do with clients struggling with disordered eating and debilitating socialemotional conditions. I’m also setting intentions to launch online yoga and fitness content, along with leading transformational wellness groups that bring together mind, body, and community.

If you could leave our readers with one lifechanging takeaway from your journey, what would it be?

What role does community and connection play in your business and events?

Community is everything. I’m lucky

What’s next for you — any upcoming retreats, books, or new programs on the horizon?

I’m co-hosting a weekend wellness retreat this September that centers around connection, yoga, inner wisdom, and play—with another already planned for the spring. In September, I’ve been asked to be the keynote speaker at the Mind, Body, and Spirit Wellness Expo as well as co-hosting the Take Her Seat one-day women’s retreat in

Treat your body like the miraculous temple it is. Remain curious. Your body is always communicating—your job is to listen, learn, and celebrate every win along the way and learn from the losses. I challenge readers to let go of the word “can’t”, rewrite your story in a way that serves to lift you and allow for new possibilities rather than keeping you stuck.

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{ JOURNEY TO SUCCESS }

WOMAN WHO INSPIRES } { WOMEN WHO INSPIRE } YOU ARE ENOUGH.

CHRISTINA FANITZI

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

Christina Fanitzi’s life is a remarkable testament to service, resilience, and the power of transformation. Crowned Mrs. New York America 2025, she stepped into the spotlight with a heart full of gratitude—for her family, her fellow titleholders, the judges, and every moment of triumph and challenge that led her there. That moment on stage, while a blur of emotions, was the culmination of a lifetime of discipline, purpose, and unwavering dedication to making a difference. From her distinguished career as a U.S. Army intelligence officer to her work as an educator, policy advisor, and now a titleholder, Christina’s journey reflects her ability to balance multiple roles with grace, grit, and authenticity.

Her call to service began at just twelve years old, during a rare family trip to Washington, D.C., where visits to Arlington National Cemetery and JFK’s Eternal Flame sparked an early dream to join the Army. Raised in the small farming town of Milton, New York, by hardworking Irish-Italian parents, Christina grew up surrounded by the values of discipline, generosity, and an unwavering work ethic. Those roots—paired with a fierce determination to lead—would take her from smalltown beginnings to global service, including leadership roles in combat zones, classrooms, and policy forums. Through every chapter, she has leaned on her faith, reminding herself to “choose faith over fear—and let it rip.”

Christina’s foray into pageantry was not about crowns or gowns—it was about reclaiming her voice after one of the most difficult seasons of her life. While serving

as a battalion commander, she learned her unborn son had been diagnosed with Spina Bifida. Navigating the weight of new motherhood, personal loss, and the demands of military service left her feeling untethered—until the Mrs. New York America competition gave her a platform to transform heartbreak into purpose. Today, her reign is fueled by advocacy for the 4,000 New Yorkers living with Spina Bifida, including expanding state funding, building support networks, and raising awareness nationwide. She is also committed to inspiring other women—especially working mothers and service members—to embrace the truth that they can be more than just one thing, blending beauty, brains, strength, and service into their own unique story.

Whether in uniform, on stage, or in the community, Christina leads with character, courage, and a deep sense of responsibility to serve something greater than herself. Surrounded by the unwavering support of her husband, son, and parents, she approaches every role—Soldier, mother, advocate, and now Mrs. New York America—with the same unshakable belief: achievements are not meant to be hoarded, but shared. And as she sets her sights on the Mrs. America stage, Christina carries with her the lessons of her heritage, the strength forged in her military service, and the unwavering love of the people who helped her get here.

your name was announced?

Thank you so much! When my name was called, I was completely overwhelmed with love and gratitude—for my husband, my sash sisters, the judges, and for every struggle and success along the journey. The moment felt like a blur. I remember shaking, trying to smile, and holding back tears. I kept looking at my husband and son, thinking, “We did it... we really, really did it.”

PHOTOS BY ROBYN BATY PHOTOGRAPHY

You’ve had an incredibly distinguished military career—what inspired you to join the Army, and did you ever imagine it would take you this far? Thank you—serving this country has truly been my greatest honor. My journey began at age 12 during a rare family trip to Washington, D.C. We didn’t travel often, so it was special—just my mom, brother, grandparents, and uncle, while my dad stayed back working hard for our family. On the final day, we visited Arlington National Cemetery. I was captivated by the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier—the discipline, the history, and what it stood for. I didn’t fully understand the gravity of military service yet, but I knew I wanted to be part of it. After that, we visited JFK’s Eternal Flame. My mom looked at me and asked, “So, what do you think, kid?” I told her, “I want to come to school in D.C., join the Army, join the CIA, and take over the world.”

In The Beautiful Cornhill Neighborhood

Personal & Background

First off, congratulations on being crowned Mrs. New York America 2025! What was your initial reaction when

That trip changed my life. I did go to school in D.C., I joined the Army, became an intelligence officer—and while I haven’t taken over the world, I strive to make a meaningful mark every day. If you told that 12-year-old

{ JOURNEY TO SUCCESS }

“Pageantry transformed my life. It gave me a platform to breathe life back into myself— and, in turn, into my son, my family, my Soldiers, and my community.”

girl from a small apple-farming town with one blinking light what was ahead of her, she wouldn’t believe it. I hope she’s proud of the woman she became.

You’re not just a military intelligence officer—you’re also an educator, policy advisor, and now a titleholder. How do you balance such an accomplished professional life with the responsibilities of pageantry?

I’ve been blessed with incredible opportunities—though thankfully, not all at once. Balancing my commitments to my Soldiers, my family, and my community takes a lot of discipline and intention. I work hard, and imperfectly, to be fully present: for my Soldiers during the workday, for my family at home, and for my community platform after my son goes to bed. I’ve also learned the importance of giving myself grace. Doing it all isn’t a perfect science. I often fall short—but I keep showing up and striving to be the best version of myself, wherever I am.

How did your upbringing in Milton, New York, and your Irish-Italian roots shape who you are today?

I’m incredibly grateful to have grown up in Milton, New York, raised by secondgeneration Irish and Italian parents. As the firstborn of two firstborns, we often joke that I’m an “alpha among alphas”— and that’s probably where my leadership journey began. We didn’t have much growing up. My parents—a mechanic and a nurse—worked extremely hard to provide for us. They led by example, instilling in me a strong work ethic and a sense of responsibility to our community. My mother was especially firm about

not accepting mediocrity. Chores were expected, and if we didn’t maintain an A average, we lost all privileges. I once asked her why she was so tough, and she said, “I just knew what you were capable of.”

My father embodies every warm-hearted Italian-American stereotype: generous to a fault, the hardest-working person I know—and an incredible cook. Our house wasn’t filled with money, and

it wasn’t always filled with happiness, but it was always full of home-cooked meals, music, family, and laughter. I’m also thankful I had the chance to know my Irish-born great-grandparents—both proud, stoic Irish Americans. My greatgrandfather was believed to be the last known survivor of the original Irish Republican Army. He never let us forget where we came from—or that while he was Irish American, we were “American

Irish,” as he liked to say with a grin. Altogether, I’m proud of my heritage and my humble beginnings. Growing up in a tiny farming town with one blinking light—where everyone knows everyone and still waves—taught me the invaluable lessons of family, unconditional love, laughter, generosity without expectation, and not just an appreciation for hard work, but an expectation of it.

What has been one of the most pivotal or transformative moments in your military service that you carry with you daily?

I can’t point to one single pivotal or transformational moment that defines my journey. Instead, I’ve been incredibly fortunate to experience a series of transformative moments, teams, and mentors throughout my career—each one helping to shape the person I am today. What I can say is that I’ve learned more through my failures and hardships than anything else. It’s in those crucible moments— when I was tested, sometimes quite literally in the fire—that I was forged and prepared for later success. I truly believe that the only way to get through something is to go through it. In my hardest and most uncertain times—whether in training, in combat, jumping out of airplanes, navigating motherhood, or facing the challenges that come with parenting a child with Spina Bifida—I’ve leaned on my faith to guide me. In those deep, dark, and difficult moments, I often say to myself: “Choose faith over fear—and let it rip.” That simple phrase has served me well, time and time again.

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“What I can say is that I’ve learned more through my failures and hardships than anything else.”

Pageant Experience & Platform

What made you decide to compete for Mrs. New York America, and how did you prepare for the pageant?

About three years ago, I became pregnant while serving as a battalion commander—a role only 9% of women held the year I was selected. The pregnancy was unplanned and certainly not common for someone in that position. I felt like I had shattered a piece of the glass ceiling. Then, at 16 weeks, my son was diagnosed with Spina Bifida Myelomeningocele. It was the worst day of my life. Still, I thought, “I can do this.” I had worked at the White House, jumped out of airplanes, served in combat, and commanded troops—I believed I could care for a child with special needs too. But the truth is, I couldn’t. I was crushed under the weight of parenting Christian, the loss of identity, and the grief over a motherhood experience I never expected.

During that time, I felt completely untethered—alone, without a compass. One night, I saw that an Air Force officer, Madison Marsh, had been crowned Miss America. I thought, “If the Air Force can have Miss America, the Army can have Mrs. America.” The next day, I reached out to the director, Diane, who gave me the confidence to enter the Mrs. New York pageant. Preparing for my first pageant was like nothing I’d ever done before. At 43, I had never worn hair extensions, acrylic nails, or owned a sparkly dress. With the help of Diane, several pageant coaches, and the Spina Bifida Association of New York State, I learned how to dress, how to walk

(yes—walk!), how to share my story, and how to speak about Spina Bifida without breaking down. Pageantry transformed my life. It gave me a platform to breathe life back into myself—and, in turn, into my son, my family, my Soldiers, and my community.

Can you tell us about your platform or mission during your reign, and what causes are closest to your heart?

My mission as Mrs. New York—and hopefully Mrs. America—is rooted in how the Mrs. America Organization helped me transform heartbreak into purpose. When my son was born with Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus, I was overwhelmed and isolated. Through this organization, I reclaimed my voice and channeled my adversity into action. I built a regional network outside of Long Island and Albany to connect Spina Bifida families. I launched the MidHudson Walk-N-Roll—the first local presence of the National Spina Bifida fundraiser in our area—and I’m working hard to expand that energy and support network statewide. I’m especially proud to be working with local legislators on a proposal for a $500,000 budget allocation to the Spina Bifida Association of New York State—a $425,000 increase—to support the 4,000 New Yorkers and their families living with the condition. My goal is to leverage over two decades of military leadership to serve in a new way—by using this platform to advocate nationally for children with complex medical needs, drive real policy change, and inspire other women who, like I once did, may feel lost or without purpose.

How do you see the role of Mrs. New

York America as an extension of your leadership in the military?

To me, being Mrs. New York America is fundamentally about service—a value that’s been at the core of my life for as long as I can remember. Just like in the Army, this role is about serving something bigger than yourself, setting an example for others, leading through hard times, and challenging people—yourself included—to realize they are capable of far more than they ever imagined.

What message do you hope to send to other women—especially working moms and service members—through your participation and win?

I’m so glad you asked this. I want to tell women (and men), especially those who may feel crushed by the weight of their responsibilities or circumstances—as I once did—that it’s okay, and even necessary, to put your own oxygen mask on first. When you breathe life back into yourself, you’re better able to pour that energy into your family, your work, and your community. I also want people to know that you don’t have to be just one thing. You can be a parent, a professional, a leader, a beauty queen—whatever your passion is. Pageantry taught me that beauty, brains, brawn, grace, and grit can coexist. And when they do, life becomes so much richer, more powerful, and more authentic.

What were some of the most memorable or surprising aspects of the Mrs. New York America competition?

Winning Mrs. Congeniality was by far the most memorable—and most surprising—moment of the competition. What I love most about pageantry is the

“Then,

at

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16 weeks, my son was diagnosed with Spina Bifida Myelomeningocele. It was the worst day of my life. Still, I thought, “I can do this.””

sisterhood. In my professional life, there aren’t many women, and as someone who is fairly senior in my field, the old saying, “It’s lonely at the top,” can sometimes feel very real. That’s why I genuinely look forward to pageant weekend—not just for the competition, but for the time spent with my sash sisters. There’s something incredibly powerful about being surrounded by strong, driven, kind women who lift each other up. To be recognized by them with the title of Mrs. Congeniality was deeply humbling and meaningful. It reminded me that showing up as your authentic self, in kindness and in strength, truly matters.And, I will absolutely be bringing each and every one of these women with me, in my heart, to Nationals.

Passions & Advocacy

How do you think military values like discipline, service, and resilience prepared you for pageantry—and for life in general?

The military didn’t just prepare me for pageantry—it prepared me for life. Values like discipline, service, and resilience became muscle memory, and tested in the most challenging times. Discipline taught me to keep showing up, even when it’s uncomfortable or inconvenient—whether that’s at 0500 for physical training or on a stage in heels under bright lights. Service taught me leadership isn’t about being in charge; it’s about taking care of people. And, that

applies whether I’m leading Soldiers, advocating for children with disabilities, or mentoring women through the Mrs. America organization. But most of all, resilience has carried me through everything—from combat zones to hospital rooms, and from moments of

like the military. And while the uniforms certainly look different, both worlds demand the same thing: showing up as your whole self, with integrity, grace, grit, and heart.

You’ve taught leadership at West Point and helped launch the Army Negotiation Conference. How do you define strong leadership, especially for women? Strong leadership is rooted in character, courage, and a refusal to accept mediocrity—both in yourself and in others. It’s about making your team a little bit better each day, and in turn, making your part of the world better. Leadership isn’t something you either have or don’t have. It’s something you must work at every single day. And the truth is, you won’t always get it right. Every interaction is a chance to either build or erode trust. When you fall short, leadership means recognizing that, owning it, and stepping back in to try again. Leadership is how you show up when no one is watching.

deep personal uncertainty to national competition stages. The Army taught me that failure isn’t final, and that courage isn’t the absence of fear—it’s the choice to move forward anyway. Pageantry is often misunderstood. It takes strength, purpose, and a sense of mission—just

It’s how you treat people when you hold power—and when you don’t. It means letting your Soldiers eat and sleep first, even when you’re cold, hungry, and exhausted. After many years of serving this country, I’ve come to believe that leadership is gender- and ethnicallyneutral. You can only be underestimated if you make yourself—or allow yourself to believe you are—underestimate-able. For a long time, I thought I needed to

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“I want to come to school in D.C., join the Army, join the CIA, and take over the world.”

be the best man I could be to succeed. And yes, that mindset brought some success in certain circles. But in many others, I believe it pushed people away. The more I tried to be “one of the guys,” the further I got from my true self—and it showed. Being a woman, and being myself, is my superpower— not my weakness. My most powerful leadership moments didn’t come from pretending to be someone else. They came when I led as exactly who I am.

Do you plan to use your platform to engage with other military spouses, veterans, or young women interested in public service?

Absolutely—I already am! I’m a proud member of the West Point Spouses’ Club and the Hudson Valley Veteran Task Force, and I reached out to both immediately after being crowned to find meaningful ways to engage their communities. In just the past month, I’ve connected with military spouses, spoken at a local school assembly about service and children with special learning needs, participated in a United Nations dialogue about the power of a mother’s love, recorded a song about my platform, and even FaceTimed with a little boy who watched the pageant and told his mom, “I want to join the Army when I grow up—like Christina.” And, we are only getting started. I have planned my reign through June which ncludes monthly events focused on raising awareness, advocating and fundraising for Spina Bifida, supporting veterans, empowering leaders, and encouraging service and good citizenship. I’m here to serve New York in any way I can be to be helpful. If you’re interested

in collaborating on a community engagement where my experience or platform could be impactful, please reach out! You can follow me on Instagram or Facebook at @christinafanitzi and @mrsnyamerica—let’s connect!

Family & Life Beyond the Uniform

Your family plays a big role in your story. How has your husband, child, and parents supported you through this journey?

We say that the Army is a family sport— and pageantry definitely is too. I couldn’t serve this country or my community without the incredible support of my family. My husband is truly a gift. He has supported me, unconditionally, in all my endeavors - whether it was commanding a battalion, leading cadets, doing my first triathlon, running the NYC Half Marathon for Spina Bifida, or doing a pageant. And, while he may not love taking 10,000 pictures of me in dresses to send to my pageant coaches, after Christian goes to bed, he drove across New York State—alone, with our two-year-old—just to make sure they could be there because that is Andrew.

He is right there with me, in the front row, cheering me on. There are no words to fully express the support my parents have given me over the years. My mother is a force of nature. She sends personally curated care packages to my Soldiers wherever we are deployed, never misses a holiday, helps with childcare during military obligations, and is my loudest cheerleader. My father is equally remarkable. He and my mother are actively helping me manage

pageant costs by securing sponsorships from local businesses and share in our advocacy journey in spreading our family’s journey with Spina Bifida. He’s absolutely my biggest fan. And Christian—Christian is my heart. He is sweet, funny, fearless, and full of joy. When he saw me in full glam for Mrs. New York for the first time, he looked at me and said, “Momma, so pretty.” In that moment, I was completely overwhelmed. I could barely breathe. I love you, Cha.

With so many accomplishments, how do you stay grounded?

I stay grounded in the sincere belief that none of this is about me. Anything I’ve accomplished is a direct reflection of the trust, support, and investment others have placed in me—my family, my Soldiers, my faith, and the many people along this journey who have believed in my story and platform. Achievements aren’t meant to be hoarded; they’re meant to be shared. Everything I achieve is meant for, and about, others.

What do you do to recharge and stay connected with yourself?

I lean on a few anchors to recharge: physical fitness, prayer, long walks with my husband and son, phone calls with my parents, brother, and close friends, and quiet evenings on the couch with my dog, a cozy blanket, and a good Netflix special. Self-care is something I’ve had to work at—it doesn’t come naturally. But when those moments of rest are missing, I feel it. As a family, we’ve learned to take stock during those times and recalibrate. It’s a work in progress, but it’s essential.

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“When my name was called, I was completely overwhelmed with love and gratitude— for my husband, my sash sisters, the judges, and for every struggle and success along the journey.”

What’s next for you—both in terms of your military career and your role as Mrs. New York America? What’s next for you—both in terms of your military career and your role as Mrs. New York America?

I intend to continue serving in the Army for as long as I’m able. My next immediate goal is to compete for Brigade Command. If selected, I’d have the incredible privilege of leading approximately 2,000 Soldiers.

In my role as Mrs. New York America, I plan to use my leadership background and experience as a special needs parent to serve New York in three key ways:

1. Spina Bifida Advocacy: As a board member of the Spina Bifida Association of New York State (SBANYS), I aim to expand programming, research, and funding beyond our current offices in

Albany, Rochester, and Long Island to the entire state. I also plan to strengthen partnerships with the Spina Bifida Association of America to build stronger nationwide connections and scale support nationally. Over the last 18 months, I’ve helped raise $165,000— and I intend to double that.

2. Policy Work: I will continue working with legislators at both the national and local levels to reduce red tape around access to medical equipment for individuals with disabilities.

3. Inspiring Women: Through my established network of schools, lawmakers, and media, I plan to implement a comprehensive engagement strategy to inspire women from all walks of life—especially those who, like I once did, feel lost or without direction—to invest in themselves and

serve others through the Mrs. America organization.

And of course, I’m incredibly excited to represent New York at the Mrs. America competition this August—a chance to serve our country in a new and different way!

o Learn more about Spina Bifida or get involved at www.sbanys.org

o Start your pageant journey at www. mrsnyamerica.com

o Support Mrs. New York in the Fabulous Face competition, find show info (live and livestream), and learn more about Victoria’s Voice—Mrs. America’s official charity partner fighting overdose—at www.mrsamerica.com

DR. SHARITTA F. KITTLES (GROSS) { WOMAN WHO INSPIRES }

Dr. Sharitta F. Kittles (Gross) is a visionary educator, leadership strategist, and philanthropist whose work is rooted in one powerful mission — to create spaces where people can grow, lead, and thrive. With over 20 years of experience in human services and education, she has mastered the art of integrating strategy with heart, helping organizations navigate complex change while keeping the human element front and center.

Her journey began with a deep fascination for how people learn and professionally evolve. Early in her consulting career, she saw both the transformative power of welldesigned training and the frustrating limitations of cookie-cutter approaches. Determined to bridge that gap, she founded ELLA Consulting LLC, a firm dedicated to crafting truly customized, human-centered learning experiences that inspire confidence, elevate performance, and spark lasting cultural change.

The name “ELLA” carries a legacy — both personal and professional. It honors her maternal grandmother, Elouise Wade, affectionately called “Ella,” whose entrepreneurial spirit and servant leadership shaped Dr. Kittles’ values from an early age. It also reflects her own academic and professional achievements, standing for Executive Leadership Los Angeles, a nod to her time building the business while living on the West Coast.

From facilitating high-impact leadership retreats to mentoring the next generation through her Change Agent Scholarship at Rochester’s School of the Arts,

Dr. Kittles embodies the belief that education is the most powerful tool for transformation. Her work extends far beyond the boardroom, touching communities, uplifting underrepresented voices in STEAM, and creating pathways for future leaders to succeed.

Whether she’s delivering a keynote, advising executives, or serving on community boards, Dr. Sharitta Kittles leads with authenticity, emotional intelligence, and grace — qualities

a deep fascination for how people learn and professionally evolve. Early in my consulting career, I witnessed firsthand the transformative power of well-designed training – how it could ignite confidence, while unlocking an organization’s full potential.

However, I also saw a persistent gap: a ‘one-size-fits-all’ approach to L&D that often omitted the anticipated learners’ perspective or work style. It missed the mark, endorsing compliant culture and creating sprint assignments that seemingly drained enthusiasm from the team. This made me passionate about the opposite –creating truly customized, humancentered experiences. Experiences that induce positive change in the workplace, directly addressing unique organizational challenges and individual needs.

she believes every great leader must possess. In every role she plays, she remains committed to building capacity, fostering resilience, and ensuring that the change she inspires today creates a legacy for tomorrow.

Can you share your journey into the world of education, learning and development, and how it led to founding ELLA Consulting LLC?

My journey into the world of education, learning, and development began with

I founded ELLA Consulting LLC to provide that bespoke approach, ensuring that every learning initiative we touch is not just effective, but truly transformative, bridging strategy with sustained human development.

What inspired the name “ELLA Consulting LLC,” and how does your grandmother’s legacy influence the work you do today?

The name of my company is two-fold. My maternal grandmother, Elouise Wade, was known to many as ‘Ella’. The most formative, early years of my life were spent living with her and she was the first entrepreneur I came into contact with. I watched her selflessly serve her church community and always admired that about her. As a graduate of St. John

PHOTOS BY NATALIE SINISGALLI. I THE WEDDING PHOTO IS BY ELEY PHOTO.

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“I believe in building capacity, fostering resilience, and creating sustainable positive change, much like the vital work the YWCA champions every day.”

Fisher’s Executive Leadership Doctorate of Education program and established my business while living in California, leading to the other meaning of ‘ELLA’: Executive Leadership Los Angeles.

You’ve worn many hats — educator, executive, change practitioner, philanthropist. How do you balance these roles, and how do they inform one another?

I don’t view these roles as separate hats, but rather as interconnected facets of my purpose. It’s actually less about ‘balancing’ and more about integrating. My executive background brings strategic discipline and operational insight to ELLA Consulting LLC. My expertise as an educator and Change Practitioner equips me to guide organizations through complex transformations, focusing on the human element of adoption and growth. Each role strengthens the others, creating a powerful synergy aimed at meaningful contribution..

What does being a “Change Practitioner” mean to you, and why is that work especially important today? For me, being a Change Practitioner means being the vital bridge between an organization’s strategic vision for the future and its people’s ability to get there. It’s more than just managing a project plan; it’s about enabling successful human transitions through organizational transformation.

What are some of the most meaningful outcomes you’ve seen from your retreat and customized session facilitation? There have been many meaningful outcomes, with two of the most

meaningful outcomes being (1) elevated team cohesion and (2) immediate application of their knowledge through the leveraging of scenarios. One session involved an exercise where leaders volunteered to share their plan to build psychological safety in their department and solve a departmental issue utilizing the data shared during my facilitation. It was great to hear the confidence in knowledge application and witness best practices being shared!

Leadership development is a huge part of what you do — what are three qualities you believe every great leader must possess? As a leadership development enthusiast, three qualities that consistently stand out as essential to effective leadership are:

1. Communication: More than just speaking, it’s about providing clarity, active listening, and building genuine connection. Great leaders ensure messages are deeply understood and acted upon, fostering alignment and trust across every level.

2. Emotional Intelligence (EQ): High EQ enables leaders to navigate complex interpersonal dynamics, build resilient teams, and create a truly human-centric culture where everyone feels valued. First and foremost, though, they must have the ability to understand and manage their own emotions.

3. Patience (and its close cousin, grace): Patience allows leaders to maintain composure during the constant challenges and setbacks that can occur during the leadership journey. It allows leaders to see the long game, and persevere without

impulsivity. Coupled with grace – the capacity for understanding, forgiveness, and kindness – it can assist in building a psychologically safe environment where individuals can learn, grow, and truly thrive.

You’ve established a scholarship at School of the Arts in honor of your own roots. Why was giving back to that school so important to you? School of the Arts was such a unique educational experience with some of the best teachers and staff. Seeking ways to pay it forward, I wanted to provide someone with what I needed when I was a student. Money shouldn’t be a barrier when someone wants to go to college, however, the reality is that it is often the case. I want to create a path of possibility for a young person from my hometown, and what better place than my former high school?

Tell us about the Change Agent Scholarship and the types of students it supports. What impact has it had so far? Nelson Mandela once said “Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.” As a first-generation college student, I know first-hand how much of a hurdle money can be when attending college. Established in 2021, the Change Agent Scholarship assists a School of the Arts senior from the ALANA population (African American, Latino/a, Native American) in their pursuit of postsecondary education in STEAM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Art and Math), education, or human services. It is my hope that every recipient of this scholarship will recognize the

“ This might sound counterintuitive, but learning to SAY “NO” strategically is crucial. It means saying “YES” to your most important PRIORITIES, your well-being, and the vision you have for your firm or YOUR TEAM.”

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“When organizations evolve there can sometimes be the feeling that there is an inability to ‘slow down to speed up’.”

change(s) that needs to occur within their community and graduate with a willingness to lend their time, as well as their talents to the cause. In addition to the $1500 scholarship, recipients of the Change Agent Scholarship also have the option to receive mentorship from me. To date, the scholarship has been awarded to 6 students representing several colleges, including Rochester Institute of Technology, Utica College, and University of Rochester.

You’re a champion for underrepresented voices in STEAM, education, and human services. How do you see that work expanding in the future?

Given the challenges caused by the elimination of DEI initiatives, reduction in NIH funding and similar programs, it is more important now than ever to offer alternatives to encourage the growth of underrepresented voices in STEAM, education, and human services. Especially STEM. ‘Data from the 2024 National Center for Science and Engineering Statistics revealed that women represented 37% of the postsecondary population in STEMM, whereas men accounted for 62%. Of the U.S.’s research faculty positions, only 4% are African American, 4% Hispanic, 0.2% Native American, and 0.1% are Hawaiian/Pacific Islander, despite these groups collectively representing some of the fastest growing subgroups in the United States (https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih. gov/articles/PMC11617101/).’

The aforementioned recommendations will require all of our efforts in the form of mentorship, financial support and leadership development opportunities. Such development opportunities will include persons at all educational levels, from high school graduate schools, to those newly entering the STEAM field(s).

“Ella’s Room” at the YWCA is such a beautiful tribute to your grandmother. How does philanthropy continue to shape your personal and professional goals? This connection to philanthropy fundamentally shapes both my personal and professional goals. Professionally, this philanthropic ethos is woven into the very fabric of ELLA Consulting LLC. Just as philanthropy aims to empower individuals and improve lives, my work in learning and development is dedicated to precisely that. It’s a reinforcement of a commitment to providing tailored, impactful solutions that genuinely empowers people and organizations to thrive. I believe in building capacity, fostering resilience, and creating sustainable positive change, much like the vital work the YWCA champions every day.

Personally, it’s a reminder of the power of compassion and collective support. It instills a continuous drive to give back and to honor her legacy by seeking out opportunities to uplift others and contribute to the well-being of the community. Ella’s Room” at the YWCA of Rochester and Monroe County is a deeply

personal and beautiful tribute to my grandmother, whose spirit of generosity and servanthood profoundly shaped me.

As a keynote and motivational speaker, what are your go-to messages when encouraging women — especially women of color — to own their power?

- You belong in the spaces you are in--walk into every room knowing and owning this truth.

- Chase the vision, not the validation.

- Be a willing vessel--willing to learn from others and allowing them to learn from you.

- You are the author of your story, so write well and edit often, being sure not to add a period where a comma or semicolon should be.

- Issue yourself the grace you so freely give to others.

What drives your ongoing support for ALANA students and programs like RIT’s Alternative Spring Break?

During my undergraduate years I didn’t experience much outside of the classroom and never even attempted work or study abroad due in part to financial limitations. From 2017-2019 I served as an Alternative Spring Break Champion, encouraging students to consider devoting their spring break to less fortunate individuals, co-leading a trip to Philadelphia. It was remarkably clear how invaluable the experience could be for a college student--potentially shifting the shape of their academic focus. This opportunity to act as an

{

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INSPIRES

“Building on the legacy embodied by “Ella’s Room,” expect to see her continued involvement in projects that uplift underrepresented populations and foster opportunities for growth and healing within communities.”

ASB Champion facilitated an increase in ALANA students’ involvement by 15% - 18% over the course of those two years. It was another opportunity to remove a barrier that could impede upon a student’s potential experience.

You’ve been honored with several recognitions like ATHENA Young Professional Finalist and RBJ’s Forty Under 40. What did those honors mean to you personally?

As an individual who strongly believes in legacy building, I think of these recognitions as not only evidence of my contribution to the Rochester community, as well as a source of encouragement for those I have been blessed to mentor.

With over 20 years of experience in human services and education, what are some of the biggest changes you’ve seen — and where do you think we still have work to do?

One of the biggest changes I’ve seen is the integration of Artificial Intelligence (AI). From assisting with certain tasks to generating content, it is clear that knowing how to maneuver through and properly leverage AI is going to be a skill many employers look for.

Succession planning and onboarding are areas where we still have work to do--hands down. When organizations evolve there can sometimes be the feeling that there is an inability to ‘slow down to speed up’. ‘Slowing down to speed up’ involves taking the time to do things like develop Standard Operating Procedures (SOPs), cross-training and professional development of individuals--all of which are attached to succession planning.

Onboarding is imperative to employee retention--particularly in their first 30 days. The way an individual is made to feel when introduced to an organization-including how they are equipped to succeed--needs to be handled with care. Additionally, there needs to be a clear delineation between orientation and onboarding. Orientation is typically a 1-2 day event to orient an individual to a space, while onboarding is an ongoing process that can take anywhere from 3-12 months.

What advice would you give young women who aspire to start their own consulting firms or step into leadership roles?

Much like a fingerprint, everyone’s entrepreneurial and leadership experience will be unique. My advice boils down to three points:

Cultivate

Unwavering Self-Belief

Believe in your unique value proposition, your ideas, and your capabilities, even when others don’t immediately see it. One thing is for certain, the journey will have doubts and setbacks. Allow yourself to be fueled by them. Invest in yourself – through continuous learning, mentorship, and building an authentic, supportive network – so that your confidence is always rooted in solid ground. Remember, your voice and perspective are incredibly valuable; the world needs them.

Embrace Your Authentic Leadership Style

Don’t feel pressured to fit into a preconceived mold of what a leader or a founder should be. Your strengths,

your empathy, your unique way of connecting, and your perspective as a woman are powerful assets. Lead from a place of authenticity. When you lead as your true self, you inspire genuine loyalty and build a culture where those you are entrusted to lead feel empowered to thrive.

Master the Art of the “No”

This might sound counterintuitive, but learning to say “no” strategically is crucial. It means saying “yes” to your most important priorities, your wellbeing, and the vision you have for your firm or your team. Whether it’s declining a project that doesn’t align with your brand, setting boundaries around your time, or delegating tasks, mastering “no” protects your energy, your focus, and your ability to deliver excellence where it truly matters.

You’ve served on so many community boards. How has service shaped your leadership style and core values?

Working with diverse groups on real-world challenges deepened my understanding of varied perspectives, while building my capacity as a leader. Serving on boards also honed collaborative leadership, as the board environment refined my ability to foster shared ownership towards a common goal. On boards, leading without direct authority means relying on influence and consensus. This environment has significantly refined my ability to empower others and foster shared ownership towards a common goal. Seeing the direct impact of collective efforts on the community has solidified my core value that true leadership is about creating lasting,

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“Communication: More than just speaking, it’s about providing clarity, active listening, and building genuine connection.”

positive change and contributing to something larger than oneself.

What’s next for Dr. Sharitta F. Kittles — personally or professionally — that we should be watching for?

The future holds exciting developments both personally and professionally, with a common thread of continued commitment to empowerment and impact.

Professionally, ELLA Consulting LLC will continue to deepen its focus on bespoke learning and development

solutions, expanding its reach to help even more organizations navigate complex change and cultivate exceptional leadership.

Watch for ELLA Consulting LLC to further refine its unique blend of strategic consultation and humancentric facilitation, ensuring that every program directly translates into tangible results and lasting cultural shifts. There’s also a strong emphasis on empowering leaders to induce positive change in the workplace.

Personally, Dr. Kittles remains dedicated to her philanthropic endeavors and community service, particularly through initiatives that support education and provide safe spaces for individuals to thrive. Building on the legacy embodied by “Ella’s Room,” expect to see her continued involvement in projects that uplift underrepresented populations and foster opportunities for growth and healing within communities.

Are you concerned about yourself or someone else?

Are you grieving the loss of someone to suicide? Do you want to learn more about suicide prevention?

Who We Are

Partners for Suicide Prevention is committed to ensuring that community members of all ages have access to accurate suicide prevention resources to help themselves and/or a loved one. As a multi-partner coalition, facilitated by the Mental Health Association of Rochester, we promote a collaborative approach to raise awareness on suicide prevention, intervention, post-vention, and recovery.

We are dedicated to providing hope and resilience through community collaboration.

Visit our Website:

suicidepreventioncoalition.org

a Donation: Join the Coalition:

vway@mharochester.org

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

Career & Background

DONNELL ADLER { QUEEN OF ARTS }

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

PROFESSIONAL

Can you tell us a little about your early journey into the world of acting and performing arts?

I was always the kid in the neighborhood putting on and performing in the talent shows and telling my mom I would end up going to the “Fame” school (Juilliard). This all started when I was 4 years old. Dance classes were followed by choir which led into full blown plays and musicals.....and the rest is history.

What was it like studying at the prestigious Juilliard School, and how did it shape you as an artist?

It was humbling, scary and wonderful all at the same time. I’m so grateful for the lessons I learned during my time there and wish I would have stayed longer.

Y ou’ve worn many hats — actress, singer, voiceover artist, casting director, producer, teacher. Which role has challenged or inspired you the most and why?

mentor to hopefully give them the lessons and advice I wish had been given to me. I grew up in a different time for women in the business (size 0 actresses were quite prominent) and it fills me with such joy and hope to see the business changing. Women have made that change by directing, casting and producing! It’s still very much a man’s world in the industry but we’re more represented than ever.

of performing at my local performing arts school. While I did go back to full time acting a couple of years later, I always took the time to teach or direct at least one class/show per year.

What is your favorite part about working with students at A Magical Journey Thru Stages and in your Drama Kids classes?

Watching these amazing young humans blossom on stage. I never had kids but I feel so much pride and joy when I see the kids I work with living their fullest lives on stage. It would take a whole novel to tell the stories of growth and human connection that I’ve gotten to be a part of with them.

I’ve been inspired the most by all of these things at one point or another in my life. The last few years have had me casting and directing a lot, which I love. At some point you realize that it’s time to pass the baton and hopefully help to inspire the next generation of humans coming up in the business of show. I’ve taken a few younger women under my wing to

How did you first get involved in teaching drama, and what inspired you to become a drama and acting teacher?

Teaching was a natural progression when I needed to take a break from the audition/performing process (it is a daily grind). I was blessed fairly early on (my mid 20’s) with the opportunity to teach many aspects

How do you incorporate your professional experiences in film, television, and theater into your teaching style?

I do my very best to distinguish between them all. Theatre is a very full body experience where you can be the best purple chicken (yes, I said purple chicken) you’ve ever been. Film, on the other hand, is quite intimate and you really only have from your waist up to tell the story....Sometimes that story is being told to a camera person checking the score of the game after they have set up the shot.

What do you think is the most important skill or lesson drama can teach children and young adults?

PHOTOS BY XANTHE ELBRICK

“ I draw INSPIRATION from the amazing artists I’ve grown up emulating as well as current artists. my Spotify PLAYLIST is all over the place, as is my taste in the PERFORMING ARTS.”

“The universal advice I’d give anyone, however, is understanding the Business of Show and what makes you stand out. “Never be afraid to let your Purple Chicken Feathers Fly”!” {

Confidently working with and respecting others as well as yourself!

Creative Process & Passion

What do you love most about being on stage or behind the scenes as a director or casting director?

Any performer will tell you that there is no other feeling that can replace the rush of being live on stage. The ability to be able to help people to lose themselves or escape into the world you are creating with your character is a gift from performer to audience member that can not be explained until you’ve had that exchange. Being behind the scenes is definitely my proud Mama Bear time. I love watching the next generation grow and flourish..especially after watching them work hard on their craft.

Where do you draw your creative inspiration from, especially when preparing a performance or leading a class?

I draw inspiration from the amazing artists I’ve grown up emulating as well as current artists. My Spotify playlist is all over the place, as is my taste in the performing arts.

How do you stay energized and creative with so many different roles and responsibilities?

I thrive off of multi-tasking and problem solving. Now that I’m in my “older youth” I find myself working with a lot of people who are decades younger than I am. My goal is to give them the same energy that they

give me (even my 6 year olds) so staying constantly active is part of my everyday lifestyle. Sleep and hydration are a must!

Teaching Around the World

You’ve taught internationally — how has that global experience influenced your perspective on performing arts and education?

No matter where I’ve taught around the world I’ve found that all students want the same thing. They want to feel like they are part of a community. The main differences from country to country are truly the level of respect, work ethic and the amount of funding/ support given to the Arts.

Is there a particular country or experience abroad that left a lasting impact on you as a teacher or performer?

I will never forget the ultimate life challenge I took on when I agreed to teach and direct in Seoul, South Korea. I arrived in Seoul knowing 1 phrase and 3 words in Korean. I then took on the very interesting challenge of teaching and directing kids who were not necessarily fluent in English. An added bonus was that my interpreter spoke very little English. Suffice to say, I became a quick study in working knowledge of Korean. I gained an entirely new respect for what it is to be an immigrant in this or any country. That new respect, along with being a first generation U.S. Citizen on my dad’s side, fuels the way I treat all immigrants that I work with to this day.

Industry Insight

As a SAG-AFTRA member, what advice would you give aspiring actors looking to break into the industry today?

The business has changed in many ways. On the positive side, gone are the days of having to look like/ identify with the cast of “Friends” or “Sex and the City” On the flipside, social media followings are holding a lot more weight than ever before. The universal advice I’d give anyone, however, is understanding the Business of Show and what makes you stand out. “Never be afraid to let your Purple Chicken Feathers Fly”!

How do you balance the business side of the entertainment industry with your passion for teaching and creating? I like to think of the balance like a mullet (yes I said a mullet). I’m all business when I’m not “In the room where it happens” and then I switch to Purple Chicken party mode once in that happening room.

Community & Le Dîner en Blanc

How did you become involved with Le Dîner en Blanc Rochester, and what drew you to this unique, elegant event?

Originally I was reached out to by this amazing woman named Noy Cohen. I had volunteered as a table leader in New York and expressed interest in doing the same when I moved to Rochester. What drew me in the most was the diverse group of beautiful humans coming together

{ QUEEN OF ARTS }

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } { WOMAN WHO INSPIRES } { WOMEN WHO INSPIRE }

“For one night I get to experience the performers that I cast, have conversations with a group of people who wouldn’t normally be all together and take in the beauty of hundreds of people unified with the common goal of friendship, food and fun.”

you personally and professionally? It’s an honor for me to now Co-Host this event as it speaks to how I try to live my own life in regards to my relationships with people. I’ve

know that I am now part of bringing these diverse and amazing humans together under the stars in the city of Rochester.

How do events like Le Dîner en Blanc align with your creative and

For one night I get to experience the performers that I cast, have conversations with a group of people who wouldn’t normally be all together and take in the beauty of hundreds of people unified with the common goal of friendship, food and fun.

BROOKE MONTENERI - LASHED EYE EXTENSIONS & MORE

PHOTOS BY CHRISTOPHER “GOODKNEWS” CARDWELL

Entrepreneurial Beginnings & Growth

Can you take us back to the very beginning—how did Lashed Eyelash Extensions and More get its start in that small room?

Lash Eyelash Extensions and More was born out of pure passion, determination, and the desire to create something meaningful, in a small room with a big dream. In the beginning, it was just one chair, one lash bed, and a vision—to help women feel confident and beautiful. That tiny space quickly became a safe haven for clients who craved not just lashes, but genuine care and transformation. With long hours, word of mouth, and relentless hustle, my business grew from a humble room into a thriving beauty sanctuary that now offers everything from lash extensions to full-body wellness. Every step of the journey was fueled by purpose, faith, and the belief that small beginnings can lead to extraordinary things

What were some of the biggest challenges you faced in the early days of launching your business?

In the early days of launching the business, some of my biggest challenges were balancing everything alone—being the lash artist, the receptionist, the marketer, and the cleaner all at once. I had moments of doubt, slow days with no bookings, and the pressure of making rent while trying to build a name from scratch. It was hard earning trust in a saturated market and proving that my little lash studio had something different to offer. But through every setback, my commitment to quality, consistency, and client care never wavered. Those tough moments taught me resilience,

resourcefulness, and the importance of staying grounded in my “why.”

At what point did you realize it was time to expand, and how did that transformation come about?

I realized it was time to expand when I was fully booked weeks in advance and had clients waiting on cancellation lists just to get in. The demand had outgrown the space, and I knew I could either stay comfortable or take a leap of faith and grow. The transformation began with hiring my first team member, investing in more training, and moving into a larger space that could support the full vision—offering not just lash services, but a complete beauty and wellness experience. It was scary, but the support from loyal clients and the desire to serve more women made it clear: the time to level up had arrived.

How does it feel today walking into your beautiful salon and seeing the team you’ve built?

Walking into my salon today feels like a dream realized. There’s a deep sense of pride in seeing a space that started with just me now filled with a team of talented, passionate women who share the same vision for beauty, confidence, and care. It’s more than just a salon—it’s a family, a safe space, and a source of empowerment for both clients and staff. Every laugh, every transformation, every moment of support between team members reminds me why I started. It’s humbling and powerful to witness the growth—not just of the business, but of the people within it.

What’s been the most rewarding part of your entrepreneurial journey so far?

The most rewarding part of my entrepreneurial journey has been watching the impact this business has had on so many lives—both my clients and my team. Seeing women walk out feeling more confident, hearing stories of how a simple beauty service lifted their spirits, or witnessing a team member grow personally and professionally—it all reminds me that this is so much bigger than lashes. It’s about creating a space where people feel seen, valued, and inspired. Knowing that something I built from the ground up is now a source of strength and transformation for others is the greatest reward of all.

Beauty Services & Passion

What drew you to eyelash extensions as your main beauty focus in the beginning?

I was drawn to eyelash extensions as my main beauty focus in the beginning due to the instant transformation they offered. I loved how a simple set of lashes could make someone feel more confident, awake, and beautiful without needing a full face of makeup. It was empowering to give women that effortless boost, especially those who were always on the go or didn’t feel like themselves. The precision, artistry, and one-on-one connection that came with each service made it more than just a beauty treatment—it became a way to connect, uplift, and make people feel seen. From the start, I knew lashes were more than a trend—they were a tool for confidence.

Over time, you expanded into waxing and permanent makeup. What inspired you to broaden your offerings?

“We’ve built a warm, welcoming environment where clients feel seen, heard, and cared for like family.”

Over time, expanding into waxing and permanent makeup felt like a natural next step. My clients began asking for more services, and I saw an opportunity to not only meet their needs but to create a one-stop beauty destination where they could feel completely cared for. I was inspired by the idea of offering convenience, consistency, and quality all under one roof. Adding new services also allowed me to grow my team with talented professionals who shared my vision. It wasn’t just about beauty—it was about confidence, empowerment, and making every client feel like the best version of themselves from head to toe.

How do you stay current with trends and techniques in the beauty industry, especially in such a fast-evolving field?

Staying current in the beauty industry has always been a top priority, especially in a field that evolves so quickly. I make it a point to invest in ongoing education, attend industry training, follow top professionals, and stay connected with what clients are asking for. Social media plays a huge role in spotting trends early, and I’m constantly researching new techniques, products, and technologies to bring the best to my clients. I also encourage my team to keep learning and growing with me, because staying ahead means never getting too comfortable. It’s about always being a student of the craft and staying passionate about what’s next.

What do you feel sets your salon apart from others in the Rochester area? What sets my salon apart from others in the Rochester area is the experience we create the moment someone walks through the door. It’s not just about lashes,

waxing, or permanent makeup—it’s about how we make people feel. We’ve built a warm, welcoming environment where clients feel seen, heard, and cared for like family. Every service is delivered with intention, detail, and heart. We combine top-tier talent with genuine connection, and that energy can’t be duplicated. Our focus on both inner and outer beauty, along with offering wellness services like GLP-1, makes us more than a salon—we’re a space for transformation and empowerment.

Personal Journey & Health Focus

You’ve been open about your own struggles with weight and the personal journey that led to discovering GLP1 Semaglutide. Can you share more about that?

I have been very open about my own struggles with weight because I know how deeply it can affect every part of your life—your confidence, energy, and even your mental health. For years, I tried everything: diets, workouts, quick fixes—and nothing gave me long-term results. Discovering GLP-1 semaglutide was a turning point. It wasn’t just about losing weight; it was about finally feeling in control of my body and my health. The medication helped suppress my appetite, boost my energy, and reset my relationship with food. It changed my life so much that I knew I had to offer it to others. It’s not just a trend—it’s a real tool that’s helping real people reclaim their lives, just like it helped me.

What made you decide to incorporate GLP-1 services into your salon offerings? Incorporating GLP-1 services into my salon was a decision born from both

personal experience and listening to my clients’ needs. After seeing how much GLP-1 semaglutide transformed my own health and confidence, I realized this was something powerful I wanted to share. Many of my clients were struggling with weight and wellness just like I was, and I wanted to create a holistic space where beauty and health could go hand in hand. Adding GLP-1 treatments felt like a natural extension of our mission—to empower women not just to look their best but to feel their best from the inside out. It’s about offering real, effective solutions that support long-term wellness.

How has the response been from your clients who have experienced this treatment?

The response from my clients has been overwhelmingly positive and inspiring. Many who have experienced the GLP1 treatment are seeing real, and lasting results—losing weight, gaining energy, and feeling more confident every week. What’s been the most rewarding is hearing how it’s not just changing their bodies, but their mindset around health and wellness. Clients appreciate that it’s a safe, medically supported option offered in a trusted, familiar space. Their success stories motivate me every day and reinforce that bringing GLP-1 into the salon was the right move to help women transform both inside and out.

Why do you believe it’s so important to address beauty and wellness from both the inside and out?

Addressing beauty and wellness from both the inside and out is essential because true transformation happens when both the body and mind are aligned.

“I realized it was time to expand when I was fully booked weeks in advance and had clients waiting on cancellation lists just to get in.”

From the inside, nourishing your body with proper nutrition, managing stress, staying hydrated, and supporting your hormones and gut health, you build the foundation for glowing skin, healthy hair, weight balance, and emotional well-being. What’s going on internally always reflects externally. On the outside Skin Care treatments, lashes, facials, body contouring, and self-care rituals enhance your natural beauty and give you that immediate confidence boost. When you look good, you feel good—and vice versa It’s not about perfection— it’s about balance. You can drink your greens, get your GLP-1 shot, and rock your lashes all in the same week. That’s the magic of inside-out beauty: it honors the whole woman.

Empowerment & Community

What does it mean to you to be able to help clients rediscover their confidence and sense of self?

For me, helping clients rediscover their confidence and sense of self is one of the most powerful and fulfilling parts of what I do. It’s not just about weight loss, clearer skin, longer lashes, or any one beauty service—it’s about watching someone light up again.It means helping a woman walk a little taller, smile a little brighter, and finally feel like the best version of herself—sometimes for the first time in years. I’ve seen clients go from feeling defeated to empowered, from hiding in photos to shining in every room they enter. When someone looks in the mirror and says, “I feel like me again,” that’s everything. It’s more than beauty. It’s healing. It’s identity. And being a part of that journey is a

blessing I never take for granted.

How would you describe your relationship with your staff, and how do you foster a positive environment in your salon? My relationship with my staff is built on trust, respect, and vision. We’re more than just coworkers—we’re a team, a family, and a reflection of the energy we bring into the salon every day. I believe that when you pour into your team, they pour into the clients, and that’s how the magic happens. I foster a positive environment with Open Communication! I make sure my team feels heard and supported. We talk openly about what’s working, what’s not, and where they want to grow—personally and professionally. Empowerment is key! I encourage creativity, continued education, and ownership of their craft. Whether it’s a new technique, service, or idea, I love when my team takes initiative and feels proud of their role in the business. Maintaining Positive Energy! The vibe in our space matters. Clients can feel it. So we keep it uplifting, drama-free, and always full of love and gratitude. We Celebrate Wins! Big or small, we celebrate milestones—client transformations, birthdays, work anniversaries, google reviews—you name it. Recognition keeps the momentum alive. At the end of the day, a happy, motivated team creates unforgettable client experiences. That’s what sets us apart.

What advice would you give to other women looking to start or grow a business in the beauty and wellness industry?

If I could give advice to any woman

starting or growing a business in the beauty and wellness industry, it would be this: Start before you feel ready. Don’t wait for perfection—take the leap and trust that you’ll learn and grow along the way. Know your “why” and let that purpose guide you, especially when things get tough. Treat your business seriously from day one—invest in systems, marketing, and your own development. Confidence is key; show up with energy and believe in the transformation you offer, because you’re not just providing a service—you’re changing lives. Stay educated, stay inspired, and never stop learning. And most importantly, build community over competition. Surround yourself with like-minded women who uplift and motivate you, because there’s room for all of us to win.

In what ways do you hope your story empowers others who may be going through similar struggles or starting from scratch?

I want my story to show other women that no matter where you start, you are capable of creating something powerful and beautiful. I didn’t have it all figured out in the beginning—I had a vision, strong work ethic, and the belief that I was meant for more. I’ve faced setbacks, doubts, and moments where giving up felt easier, but I kept going because I knew my purpose was bigger than my fear. If my journey can inspire even one woman to stop playing small, take the first step, or to believe in herself again, then it’s all worth it. I want others to see that success isn’t about having it all together—it’s about showing up, staying consistent, and trusting that every struggle is shaping your strength.

“With long hours, word of mouth, and relentless hustle, my business grew from a humble room into a thriving beauty sanctuary that now offers everything from lash extensions to full-body wellness.”

If I can do it, so can you.

Future Vision

What’s next for Lashed Eyelash Extensions and More? Do you have new goals or services on the horizon that you’re excited about?

Lashed EyeLash Extensions and More is all about growth, innovation, and

taking things to the next level. We’ve already expanded into wellness with our GLP-1 services, and now we’re focused on offering a full beauty and wellness experience that empowers our clients from the inside out. I have new services in the works, advanced training planned, and big goals for scaling the business while continuing to create real impact. I’m excited to build a space where

women feel supported, confident, and transformed—mind, body, and spirit. LASHED is more than just a salon—it’s becoming a movement, and this is only the beginning.

FB: Lashed Extensions and More IG: lashedeyeleash Contact us at 585-775-9346 for booking.

{ FOR A GOOD CAUSE } NURSES HONOR GUARD

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

The Nurses Honor Guard of Monroe County was founded from a place of profound personal reflection and deep respect for a profession that quietly shapes countless lives. Its beginnings trace back to 2014, when the founder’s brother-inlaw, RPD Officer Daryl Pierson, was killed in the line of duty. Witnessing the solemn tributes and heartfelt ceremonies honoring his life of service sparked a realization—nurses, too, dedicate themselves fully to the wellbeing of others, yet often leave this world without a formal acknowledgment of their sacrifices. Having learned about Nurses Honor Guards while studying in Texas, the founder returned to Rochester to find no such organization existed locally. From that gap grew a mission: to ensure nurses receive a dignified, compassionate farewell that reflects the depth of their service and the humanity they’ve given to so many.

At the heart of the organization’s mission is a simple but powerful principle—Nurses Honoring Nurses. The Honor Guard stands as a living testament to the truth that nursing is not merely a job, but a calling. Through ceremonies that include the Nightingale Tribute, the ringing of a bell, and the extinguishing of the Nightingale Lamp, the Honor Guard creates moments that bring both comfort and recognition to grieving families. These rituals serve as a symbolic “final call to duty,” releasing the nurse from earthly service and honoring the lifetime of compassion, advocacy, and skill they

gave to their patients. Whether performed posthumously or as a Living Tribute, these ceremonies are designed to leave an indelible mark of gratitude and respect.

What makes the Nurses Honor Guard’s work so meaningful is not just the ceremony itself, but the deeply personal connections forged through each tribute. Families often share that the experience offers them a sense of closure, pride,

Can you share how the Nurses Honor Guard of Monroe County first got started and what inspired its formation?

The Nurses Honor Guard of Monroe County was born from a deeply personal experience. My sister is the widow of RPD Officer Daryl Pierson, who was tragically killed in the line of duty in 2014. I was profoundly moved by the outpouring of respect and honor shown to him by various organizations during his memorial. Witnessing these tributes sparked a reflection on the sacrifices and vital impact nurses make every single day.

and peace—sometimes unlocking grief that had been held inside. Living Tributes, in particular, carry a unique emotional weight, allowing gratitude to be expressed directly to the nurse being honored. Every rose presented, every lamp extinguished, and every name spoken aloud reflects a truth that guides the Honor Guard’s work: that the legacy of a nurse is measured not in years served, but in lives touched.

Mission & Purpose

I felt strongly that nurses are also deserving of reverence—a meaningful, dignified sendoff that truly honors their lifelong commitment to caring for others. While I had learned about the existence of Nurses Honor Guards during my nursing studies in Texas, I realized there was no such organization in the Rochester area upon my return. This realization inspired me to bring the Nurses Honor Guard to Monroe County, creating a space where nurses could be celebrated with the honor and compassion they so deeply deserve.

What is the heart behind your mission, and why is it so important to honor nurses at the end of life or posthumously?

The core of our mission is “Nurses Honoring Nurses.” Nurses are present during some of the most profound moments in a person’s life—birth, death, times of pain and healing. They walk alongside patients through joy, grief, crisis, and recovery. We believe that their service should be acknowledged with

{

FOR A GOOD CAUSE }

“It’s a reminder that what we offer fills a need many didn’t even realize was missing— until they witness it for themselves.”

the dignity it deserves. We’ve never had to turn down a tribute due to lack of volunteers, which speaks to the dedication of our team. Through the Nightingale Tribute and the ceremonial “final call to duty,” we hope to ease the family’s grief while honoring their loved one’s commitment to the profession. The ceremony—featuring a white rose, the ringing of a bell, and the extinguishing of a Nightingale lamp—symbolically releases the nurse from their earthly duties, offering families a moment of reflection, gratitude, and closure.

How does a Living Tribute differ from the ceremonies performed at funerals or memorial services?

Living Tributes can be especially meaningful because they allow us to honor the nurse while they are still with us, creating a deeply personal and emotional experience. Unlike ceremonies held after a nurse has passed, a Living Tribute gives us the opportunity to express our gratitude face-to-face. We’re able to present symbolic gifts—such as the Nightingale Lamp, a white rose, and a handmade prayer shawl—directly to the nurse we are honoring, allowing them to feel the appreciation personally. There is something profoundly powerful about saying thank you while someone can still hear it. While end-of-life or posthumous tributes are equally respectful and heartfelt, the Living Tribute offers a moment of connection that stays with everyone involved. It’s a final act of honor that acknowledges the nurse’s legacy while they are still present to receive it.

What does a typical tribute ceremony involve, and how do families and fellow nurses usually respond?

A typical tribute ceremony is both solemn and deeply moving, designed to honor the life and service of the nurse with reverence and care. The ceremony begins with the reading of the Nightingale Tribute, which reflects on the nurse’s calling, their compassion, and their dedication to the art of healing. This is followed by the final roll call, during which the nurse’s name is called three times—symbolizing their last call to duty—ending with the quiet ringing of a bell. Finally, the Nightingale Lamp is extinguished, representing the nurse’s release from earthly service and the peaceful close of their professional journey. Families and fellow nurses often describe the ceremony as profoundly emotional. One moment that particularly stands out came from a husband who shared that the tribute was the first time he had been able to cry for his wife—a powerful reminder of how meaningful these rituals can be in the grieving process.

We frequently hear from families and volunteers alike that they felt chills during the final roll call. The ceremony has a sacred weight to it, offering comfort, closure, and a deep sense of honor. It not only acknowledges the nurse’s professional legacy but also creates a shared space of reflection and gratitude that leaves a lasting impression on everyone present.

Impact & Experience

Can you describe a tribute that was especially emotional or meaningful for you or the team?

Each tribute touches us in different ways, but one that deeply affected me was the unexpected death of a young mother. We were able to present items

to her school-aged daughter. I remember hoping that, through our tribute, her daughter could see the profound impact her mother had on the world and the lives she touched through nursing. I still think of that family often and wonder if that young girl might one day follow in her mother’s footsteps. Though I never knew the nurse personally, by the end of her service, I felt a genuine connection to her. That’s the power of these tributes—they turn strangers into stories we carry with us.

How has participating in the Honor Guard impacted your own life or view of the nursing profession?

Being part of the Honor Guard has been one of the most meaningful experiences of my life—both personally and professionally. It has provided a space for healing, allowing me to process my own grief while honoring others who shared this same calling. Standing beside fellow nurses in tribute has shown me how deeply connected we all are, no matter our backgrounds or specialties. There’s a shared thread that runs through us—a quiet strength, a deep compassion, and a commitment to serving others that doesn’t end with our final shift.

Participating in these ceremonies has reminded me of the sacredness of nursing. We are present for some of the most vulnerable and raw moments in people’s lives. As our tribute states, nurses “witness humanity, in good times and bad, without judgment”—and those words resonate more with me now than ever before. It’s deepened my pride in this profession and renewed my sense of purpose. Every tribute is a reminder that what we do

“The response from families and the community has been overwhelmingly positive and deeply emotional.”

matters—and that even in death, the legacy of a nurse continues to inspire.

How do you think the pandemic shifted public perception of nurses, and did it influence the growth of the Honor Guard?

The pandemic brought the nursing profession into the spotlight in a way we hadn’t seen before. Nearly everyone, in some way, was impacted by the care and presence of a nurse—whether through a loved one’s experience, a news story, or personal hospitalization. What the world saw during COVID-19 was what nurses have always done: provide whole-person, compassionate care under intense pressure, advocate fiercely for patients, and adapt quickly in crisis. This widespread visibility reshaped public perception. Nurses were no longer seen only as caregivers, but also as frontline heroes, essential leaders, and emotional anchors in times of fear and uncertainty. That shift helped deepen respect for our profession—and with that came a desire to honor nurses in more meaningful, lasting ways.

I believe this increased recognition directly influenced the growth of the Honor Guard. As people searched for ways to acknowledge the sacrifice and humanity of nurses, our tributes became a powerful outlet—a way to say thank you in a deeply personal and ceremonial way.

What has the response been from families and the community when they learn about the services you provide? The response from families and the community has been overwhelmingly

positive and deeply emotional. Many people are genuinely surprised to learn that such a tribute exists—especially one that’s offered at no cost—and their reactions are often filled with gratitude and reflection. It’s common to hear things like, “I wish this had been available for my loved one,” or “I know a nurse who would be so honored by this.” That kind of feedback reinforces just how meaningful these ceremonies are.

Because nearly everyone has been touched by a nurse at some point, there’s a deep, shared appreciation for the profession—and when people see that there’s a way to honor that service in such a personal, respectful way, it really resonates. While we do outreach to funeral homes, hospice centers, and nursing communities, much of our growth has come from word of mouth. Families who experience a tribute often become our most passionate advocates, helping to spread awareness simply by sharing how much it meant to them. It’s a reminder that what we offer fills a need many didn’t even realize was missing—until they witness it for themselves.

Membership & Community

How can nurses in Monroe County and beyond get involved with the Honor Guard, and what does being a volunteer entail? Getting involved with the Nurses Honor Guard is a meaningful way for nurses to honor their profession and support one another—both in Monroe County and beyond. Each chapter may vary slightly, but here in Monroe County,

we strive to keep volunteering flexible and accessible for all.

There’s no set time commitment—nurses are welcome to participate as their schedules allow. Our attire is traditional but simple: white scrubs or a white scrub dress, paired with the iconic nursing cap and cape. There are no membership dues, though optional contributions toward supplies are always appreciated. When a tribute request is received, we send out a “Call to Duty” via email, and volunteers can sign up through a provided link. Opportunities include participating in funeral or hospice tributes, standing casket guard, speaking at conferences, marching in parades, and even honoring new graduates at Pinning Ceremonies— creating a sense of continuity from the beginning to the end of a nursing career. Nurses in Monroe County can reach out to us directly at NHGofMCNY@ gmail.com. For those outside the region, the National Nurses Honor Guard Coalition can help connect you with a local chapter at NNHGC2024@ gmail.com.

Whether you’ve just begun your journey or have decades of experience, your presence in the Honor Guard can be a powerful way to give back to a profession that gives so much.

What qualifications or backgrounds do members typically have, and is prior ceremonial experience required? Our members come from a wide range of nursing backgrounds, including LPNs, RNs, advanced practice nurses, retirees, and even current nursing students. What unites us is a shared commitment to

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“It’s deepened my pride in this profession and renewed my sense of purpose. Every tribute is a reminder that what we do matters—and that even in death, the legacy of a nurse continues to inspire.”

g nurses at the end of their journey is a way of saying, “You mattered. Your service meant something.” It’s a final act of gratitude for a lifetime of selfless service

What message would you like to share with current and future nurses about the legacy their work leaves behind?

To all current and future nurses, I want you to know that your legacy is not defined by the length of your career, but

by the countless lives you touch and the meaningful difference you make each day. As our tribute beautifully states, “You will not be remembered for your years as a nurse, but by the difference you made during those years.”

The compassion, care, and dedication you bring to your patients leave an enduring mark—one that lives on long after your time at the bedside ends. Your work creates ripples of healing, hope,

and comfort that reach far beyond what you may ever see.

Never underestimate the power of your presence and actions. Each moment of kindness and advocacy builds a legacy of profound impact—one that honors not only your profession but the very essence of humanity itself.

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

ALYSE & TAYLOR OF FUSION DIGITAL

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

PHOTOS BY DANIELLE JONES - EVOLUTION MARKETING

When sisters Alyse and Taylor stepped into leadership at Fusion Digital, they weren’t just taking over a family business—they were carrying forward a legacy built on people, purpose, and innovation. Founded by their father, Fusion Digital began as a company rooted in relationships, where flexibility, family, and long-term trust were as important as the technology solutions it delivered. Over the years, both women charted their own paths—Alyse joining in 2013 with a curious spirit that grew into a deep operational leadership role, and Taylor building a career in HR and leadership before officially coming aboard in 2021. Together, they have blended their unique strengths, values, and vision to guide the company into its next chapter.

Fusion Digital is far from a typical tech firm. As a full-service technology solutions provider specializing in both Information Technology and Audio Visual, the company designs, implements, and supports everything from cyber security and network infrastructure to meeting room automation and digital signage. Their client base spans businesses, schools, higher education institutions, and local government, all relying on Fusion’s ability to simplify the complex and deliver solutions that are both strategic and hands-on. Under Alyse and Taylor’s leadership, the company has doubled its revenue, expanded its team, earned industry awards, and deepened its community impact.

But for the sisters, success is measured by more than just numbers. It’s about preserving the culture their father built, fostering a workplace where people feel supported and valued, and using their

growth to give back to the community that has supported them. Whether sponsoring local events, contributing to nonprofits, or mentoring the next generation of leaders, Alyse and Taylor are proving that in business—as in family—shared values and trust can be the most powerful drivers of lasting success.

Can you both share a bit about yourselves and what led you to take over the family business?

Alyse:

When I joined Fusion in 2013, I didn’t step in thinking I would one day help run it. I started with a sense of curiosity, willingness to learn, contribute, and see where it took me. What I found was a passion I didn’t expect. Over time, that curiosity turned into a deep desire to take ownership, not just of my role, but of the company’s future. I worked my way up from sales support to managing our largest enterprise accounts and eventually overseeing operations.

A huge part of that drive came from watching my Dad build something so rooted in people. He created a culture that valued flexibility, family, and longterm relationships, one where people could grow lifelong careers and still be present for what matters at home. That left a lasting impression on me, and it’s something I work hard to preserve and build upon today.

Taylor:

I spent several years in the corporate world, working in HR and leadership roles, and from the outside, I always admired what our dad, and later, Alyse, were building. When I decided to join

Fusion full-time in 2021, it was because I saw the opportunity to contribute to something deeply meaningful and aligned with my values. I didn’t just want to work in a business, I wanted to help grow one that put people first, served its community, and had the kind of culture most companies aspire to. The transition into ownership was something we earned through years of showing up, leading with integrity, and committing to the company’s long-term vision. It’s a privilege to carry on what our Dad started, and to help shape its future with intention and heart.

What exactly is Fusion Digital, and what services do you offer?

Fusion Digital is a full-service technology solutions provider specializing in Information Technology and Audio Visual. We handle everything from start to finish – consulting, system design, cyber security, hardware/software procurement, installation, and ongoing support. Our clients span a wide range of sectors, including commercial businesses, K–12 schools, higher education institutions, and local government. Whether it’s digital signage, meeting room technology, control systems, network infrastructure, or managed IT services, we simplify the complex so our clients can focus on what they do best. Our strength lies in being both strategic and hands-on, delivering solutions that are custom, scalable, and built to last.

How do you navigate the dynamics of being sisters and business partners?

Alyse:

It works for us because it started with a strong foundation, we’ve been best friends since we were kids. That kind {

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“It works for us because it started with a strong foundation, we’ve been best friends since we were kids. That kind of closeness naturally carried over into our professional lives.”

- Alyse

of closeness naturally carried over into our professional lives. We genuinely like each other, and as funny as that might sound, it makes a huge difference. We respect each other’s strengths, we know our own flaws, and we’ve learned to give each other grace. When one of us is overwhelmed, the other steps in. We’re aligned in our vision for the company, and that shared sense of purpose is what keeps us grounded and forward-focused, even when things get tough.

Taylor:

Being in business with a sibling isn’t for everyone, and we’re the first to admit that. What makes it work for us is that we’re both committed to the same end game. We have different strengths that complement each other really well, and we’ve built this rhythm where we naturally fill in the gaps for one another. It’s not perfect, no partnership is, but there’s an unshakable trust between us. We love each other, we love what we’re building, and we know how rare it is to have both. That shared history, paired with real respect and aligned goals, gives us the kind of synergy that’s hard to replicate.

What are some of the challenges you face working together, and how do you overcome them?

Alyse:

There are definitely moments when personal emotions can mix into professional decisions, but we’ve learned how to separate the two. The hardest part is that when we disagree, it feels heavier because of the personal connection. But we work through it because we genuinely want the best for each other and the company. We remind ourselves often:

this is bigger than either of us alone.

Taylor:

We’re both passionate and strong-willed, which can create friction, but that’s also part of what makes us a great team. We’ve put in the work to understand how the other thinks, and we’ve built trust by consistently showing up for each other. When challenges arise, we don’t ignore them, we talk through them and move forward. Having the same long-term vision keeps us aligned, even when we approach things differently in the moment.

Since taking over, what changes and technological advancements have you implemented in Fusion Digital?

We’ve invested heavily in automation tools, CRM systems, and upgraded our internal tech stack to improve workflow, communication, and the overall client experience. We redesigned our headquarters to include a state-ofthe-art technology demo space, giving clients the ability to interact with solutions firsthand.

We’ve also continued to grow, and with that growth comes the responsibility to evolve our structure. We’ve added key positions like field engineers, designers, inside sales, project management, and most recently, a CTO, all in an effort to strengthen our internal operations and create lasting value for our clients. At the same time, we’re consistently investing in our people through talent development and training to ensure our team remains ahead of industry demands.

We’ve also shifted our service model

to offer more proactive support and remote monitoring, positioning us for the future of AV and IT. Altogether, these advancements have helped us scale with purpose and better serve the organizations that trust us.

Can you share some of your biggest successes since becoming owners?

We’ve nearly doubled our revenue, expanded into new markets, earned multiple industry awards, and built a team we’re incredibly proud of. We were recently ranked #9 on Rochester’s Top 50 Women-Owned Businesses list, which was a huge honor, and becoming a certified Great Place to Work™ has been a proud reflection of the culture we’ve worked hard to continue to foster.

But success for us isn’t just about growth, it’s also about impact. As our business has grown, so has our ability to give back. We’re proud that increased revenue has allowed us to significantly expand our contributions to local causes. Whether it’s raising money for the MS Society, supporting the Shepherd Home, or sponsoring youth programs and community events, there is always a cause we’re championing. Being able to use our success to lift others up is one of the achievements we’re most proud of.

What do you attribute to Fusion Digital being named one of Rochester’s Top 100 companies in 2020?

That recognition, and the fact that we’ve earned a spot on the list nearly every year since, speaks to our consistency, resilience, and commitment to excellence. We attribute it to the strength of our longterm client relationships, our ability to adapt quickly in a fast-moving industry,

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“Fusion Digital is a full-service technology solutions provider specializing in Information Technology and Audio Visual. We handle everything from start to finish – consulting, system design, cyber security, hardware/software procurement, installation, and ongoing support.”

and the dedication of our team.

Even during periods of uncertainty and rapid change, our people have continued to show up, pivot when needed, and deliver at a high level. We’ve made it a priority to invest in both innovation and culture, ensuring that as we scale, we stay grounded in the values that got us here. That balance of peoplefirst leadership and forward-thinking strategy has played a huge role in our continued success.

How do you stay innovative and ahead of the curve in the digital marketing industry?

While we’re not a traditional digital marketing agency, our work is deeply rooted in digital transformation. We help organizations modernize how they communicate, operate, and engage, whether through smart AV systems, IT infrastructure, or integrated technology solutions. Staying ahead means staying curious.

We make it a point to attend industry conferences, participate in manufacturer trainings, and test emerging technologies before recommending them to our clients. We maintain strong partnerships with leading tech brands, giving us early access to new tools and platforms. Internally, we foster a culture where innovation is encouraged, our team regularly brings forward new ideas, and we have systems in place to vet and implement them quickly.

Most importantly, we listen. By staying close to our clients’ evolving needs and being responsive to industry trends, we’re able to pivot quickly and continue

delivering solutions that are not only relevant, but future-ready.

Can you tell us about a particularly memorable project or client experience?

Alyse:

One that stands out to me is a project we did for a local nonprofit that needed to modernize their IT infrastructure on a tight budget. They were doing incredibly important work in the community but were being held back by outdated systems. We helped design and implement a solution that was not only cost-effective but gave them the tools to work more efficiently and expand their reach. Being able to use our expertise to support a mission-driven organization was deeply fulfilling, and it reminded me why we do what we do. It’s not just about the tech; it’s about helping people do their work better.

Taylor:

One particularly memorable project for me was working with a local school that needed a complete overhaul of their PA system. It was a high-stakes environment where communication was critical, not just for daily announcements, but for overall safety. We worked closely with their team to design and implement a reliable, easy-to-use solution that was tailored to the specific needs of the building and its staff.

The project required thoughtful planning, coordination, and customization to ensure it would serve both current and future needs. Seeing the system in use and knowing it was making a real impact on how the school operated was incredibly rewarding. Since completing that initial project, we’ve been brought

back to upgrade a second school in the district which is always the highest compliment and a testament to the strength of the partnership we built.

What values or principles guide your business operations at Fusion Digital?

At Fusion Digital, our values aren’t just words, they’re the foundation of how we lead, serve, and grow. Integrity is at the heart of everything we do. We believe in doing the right thing, even when no one is watching, and we hold ourselves accountable to that standard in every interaction, with clients, employees, and partners.

We lead with a people-first mindset. That means creating a workplace where our team feels supported, valued, and empowered to grow, not just professionally, but personally. We treat our employees like family, and that culture of care and flexibility translates directly into the way we treat our clients.

Responsiveness is another cornerstone. We show up, we follow through, and we make our customers problems our own. Our team takes pride in being a trusted partner, not just a vendor. We listen, we adapt, and we deliver.

We also believe strongly in giving back. As a family-owned business, we feel a deep responsibility to support the community that’s supported us. From donating to local causes to volunteering our time and resources, service extends beyond our client work; it’s part of our identity.

Ultimately, we’re guided by the belief that if you take care of your people, stay

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“We’ve

nearly doubled our revenue, expanded into new markets, earned multiple industry awards, and built a team we’re incredibly proud of.”

grounded in your values, and lead with purpose, success will follow.

How do you maintain a healthy worklife balance while running a successful business together?

Taylor:

Work-life balance doesn’t just happen, it has to be intentional, and we hold each other accountable to that. We support one another both inside and outside the business, and that means checking in, encouraging time off, and recognizing when the other needs a break. We’ve learned that rest, joy, and presence aren’t luxuries, they’re necessary if we want to show up as effective leaders.

We also believe in creating space for fun. Whether it’s a spontaneous lunch break, a long weekend, or celebrating wins with our team, we try to infuse moments of connection and levity into the rhythm of our work. We make time for family, for hobbies, and for ourselves because burnout helps no one, and balance is what sustains everything else.

Alyse:

For me, maintaining balance is a conscious, daily decision. I have a 1-yearold daughter, and being present for her is one of my biggest motivators to create healthy boundaries around work. Of course, it’s not always easy but having a sister as a business partner who understands the value of family makes a big difference.

We’ve also built a leadership team we trust, and that allows us to step away when we need to without feeling like everything will fall apart. Delegation and trust are key. We’re not trying to

do it all; we’re trying to do what matters most, both in business and at home. And ultimately, we’ve designed a culture at Fusion where we encourage our whole team to live by those same values. A successful business should enhance your life, not consume it.

What advice would you give to other siblings considering going into business together?

Taylor:

Start by being brutally honest about your relationship. Just because you’re close doesn’t mean you’re automatically compatible as business partners. Do your strengths complement each other? Can you communicate clearly and respectfully, even when you disagree? Those things matter more than shared DNA.

You also have to be willing to separate personal dynamics from business decisions. There will be times when one of you has to hold the other accountable, and you need to be able to have those conversations professionally—behind closed doors. It’s critical that your team never feels the weight of your disagreements. Presenting a united front, even in moments of internal tension, builds trust and stability across your organization.

Mutual respect, aligned values, and a shared vision are non-negotiable. And most importantly, treat each other like business partners first, especially when the stakes are high.

Alyse:

Make sure you’re aligned not just in your vision for the business, but in your work ethic, goals, and expectations. It’s not

enough to say, “We both want to grow this company.” You need to be clear on how you plan to grow it, who’s doing what, and how you’ll handle conflict.

Also, this might sound simple, but you really have to like each other. Loving your sibling is one thing, but liking them day to day? That’s what gets you through the hard stuff. We genuinely enjoy spending time together, and that’s been a huge part of our success.

And finally, give each other grace. You’re going to have different seasons, different stress levels, different strengths. What keeps us going is the understanding that we’re not in this alone; we’re building something meaningful together. That shared sense of purpose makes all the difference.

In what ways do you give back to the community through Fusion Digital? Giving back isn’t just something we do; it’s part of who we are. As a familyowned business rooted in the Rochester community, service is woven into the culture of Fusion Digital. We feel a deep responsibility to use our growth and resources to make a meaningful impact.

We support a wide range of causes that matter to us, our clients, employees, and family. From national efforts like the MS Society to hyperlocal initiatives like the Monroe 1 BOCES golf tournament for children in need, we show up where it counts. We sponsor local sports teams, dance studios, and fundraisers, and we’re proud to maintain the grounds and provide weekly lawn care for the Shepherd Home, a local comfort care facility.

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“At Fusion Digital, our values aren’t just words, they’re the foundation of how we lead, serve, and grow. Integrity is at the heart of everything we do.”

Some causes are especially close to our hearts. We support MEG’s Gift, which brings awareness and resources to mental health; a mission that hits home for our family. We also support Heritage Christian Services, where our sister has lived in one of their community homes for decades. Organizations like the Challenger Field for children with disabilities, Camp Good Days, and Holy Childhood School are also a part of our giving story.

Through partnerships with clients like Sheetz & Wegmans, we contribute to charity-driven events & causes, and we work with Sun King’s electronics recycling program to donate tech that generates funding for nonprofits. We’re currently in our second year supporting the Pencils & Paper program through JFS Rochester, helping ensure local students have access to essential school supplies.

We also encourage our team to get involved, whether it’s volunteering, running donation drives, or nominating causes they care about. At Fusion, giving back is an extension of how we do business.

The more we grow, the more we’re able to give—and nothing makes us prouder than using our success to strengthen the community that helped build us.

How do you see the future of Fusion Digital evolving in the next few years?

We see Fusion Digital continuing to grow in both scale and impact.

Managed services will remain a major focus, as more organizations look for long-term partners who can provide proactive support across IT and AV. We’re leaning into smarter, more seamless integrations – solutions that not only work well but work together – and we’re continuing to invest in platforms and processes that make technology more intuitive and accessible for our clients.

Geographically, we’re expanding our reach to support clients across a broader footprint, while still maintaining the responsiveness and personalized service we’re known for. As we grow, we’re also building out our internal infrastructure with a strong emphasis on developing our leadership pipeline. We want to empower the next generation of Fusion leaders to step up with confidence, creativity, and clarity.

Ultimately, the future of Fusion is about scaling with intention, growing in ways that benefit our team, our clients, and our community. We’re focused on long-term sustainability, smart innovation, and staying rooted in the values that got us here.

What sets Fusion Digital apart from other digital marketing agencies in Rochester?

We’re often grouped with digital marketing firms, but we’re actually something entirely different, and that’s part of what makes us unique. Fusion Digital is a full-service technology solutions provider specializing in the intersection of IT and AV. While traditional marketing agencies focus

on branding, content, and advertising, we focus on infrastructure, user experience, and long-term outcomes.

Our work powers the environments where people learn, collaborate, shop, meet, and connect. From digital signage and PA systems to secure networks and meeting room automation, we build integrated systems that are both high-performing and intuitive to use. What truly sets us apart is our ability to bring AV and IT together in a way that’s seamless, scalable, and centered around people, not just products.

We take pride in being both strategic and hands-on, offering end-to-end service from design and procurement to installation and ongoing support. Clients trust us not only for the quality of our work, but for how we show up, as partners, problem-solvers, and long-term allies in their success.

So no, we’re not a digital marketing agency and that’s exactly why clients come to us when they need solutions that go deeper than the screen.

You can contact them as follows: linkedin: fusiondigital insta: @fusiondig facebook: FusionDigitalRoc fusiondig.com

FABIOLA AGUILERA

BY DR PAM DENTON I PHOTO BY KATRINA GRADY

My journey began in the heart of my family’s kitchen in Mexico, where the rhythm of tortilla-making and the aroma of freshly roasted chiles were as much a part of life as breathing. I grew up watching my mother cook with unshakable passion, grinding spices on a molcajete and pouring love into every dish. That’s where I learned that food isn’t just fuel—it’s memory, tradition, and identity. Years later, my sister Gricelda and I brought that philosophy to life when we opened our first restaurant, Made in Mexico, in Sodus. With just a few tables and a small kitchen, we built a place where every tortilla was pressed by hand, every salsa roasted from scratch, and every recipe told the story of our heritage. When I opened my own restaurant, Aguilera’s Authentic Mexican Food, in Rochester’s beloved former Sol Burrito space, it was both a continuation of that story and a leap forward. It was about honoring tradition while creating a welcoming space for the community to share in the flavors and spirit of home-style Mexican cooking.

just your body, but your entire mindset. That dedication led me to win the Overall Wellness title at the NPC Greater New York Championships, a moment that validated years of early mornings, strict training, and relentless focus.

Balancing restaurant ownership, a career as a USPS mail carrier, and the demands of competitive bodybuilding has required discipline, time management, and a deep

wellness together under one roof.

What first inspired you to open your own restaurant, and how did your journey in the food industry begin?

But my passion for building and honoring traditions didn’t stop in the kitchen—it carried over into another part of my life that has shaped me just as deeply: bodybuilding. My fitness journey began after high school, at a time when I felt far from my best physically and mentally. What started as a desire to lose weight evolved into a commitment to discipline, self-respect, and growth. Bodybuilding became my therapy and my proving ground, teaching me that with consistent effort, you can transform not

sense of purpose. At the core of both my food and fitness journeys is the same belief: authenticity matters. Whether I’m hand-preparing tamales or stepping on stage for competition, I stay true to my roots and lead with passion. As a Latina, representing both the culinary and fitness worlds is an honor—it’s about showing that you can stay grounded in your culture while pushing boundaries and inspiring others to rise. Looking ahead, I’m focused on competing at the national level, continuing to grow Aguilera’s, and finding ways to bring my love for culture, community, and

My journey in the food industry started in the heart of my family’s kitchen in Mexico. I grew up watching my mother cook with such passion. She would make tortillas by hand, grind spices on a molcajete, and poured love into every dish. That’s where I first understood that food isn’t just fuel — it’s memory, tradition, and identity.I realized that my dream wasn’t just to cook, but to share the rich, diverse flavors of Mexican cuisine in an authentic and personal way. That’s what inspired my sister Gricelda and I to open our restaurant. We wanted to create a space where every dish tell a story. My goal has always been to honor my heritage while adding my own creative twist. Opening this restaurant was about more than business — it was about keeping tradition alive, and inviting others to experience the warmth and vibrancy of real Mexican food.

Tell us about Made in Mexico and your original restaurant in Sodus — what makes your food stand out as truly authentic?

Made in Mexico was born out of a deep love for my culture and a desire to share real, home-style Mexican cooking with people outside of Mexico. Our first restaurant in Sodus was small — just a few tables, a simple kitchen — but it was built with heart, family recipes, and a commitment to authenticity. We didn’t cut corners. We made everything from scratch: fresh tortillas, slow-cooked meats,

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“My cultural background has taught me the value of hard work, resilience, and community—principles I carry into both business and personal goals.”

traditional salsas, and dishes that came straight from the soul of Mexico. What makes our food truly authentic isn’t just the ingredients — it’s the process and the respect for tradition. We use techniques passed down through generations, whether it’s roasting chiles for our salsas, preparing tamales by hand, or crafting dishes with over 20 ingredients. Every dish tells a story.

How did it feel opening your very own location in the former Sol Burrito space in Rochester?

My sister Gricelda decided to go on our separate journeys and I decided to open my very own restaurant. Opening my own “Aguilera’s authentic Mexican Food” location in the former Sol Burrito space in Rochester was a surreal and humbling experience. That spot had a lot of meaning to the community, so stepping into it wasn’t something we took lightly. We knew we were walking into a place that already had history — and we were honored to bring our own story to it. For us, it was a big step forward. Coming from our original location in Sodus, where everything started so small and personal, expanding to Rochester meant reaching more people with our food, our culture, and our heart. It was emotional — exciting, a little overwhelming at times, but mostly just a feeling of deep gratitude. We were proud to show that authentic, home-style Mexican food belongs on this bigger stage. What made it even more special was the way the community welcomed us. People showed up, shared their memories of Sol Burrito, and then made new ones with us. That’s what food is all about — connection, tradition, and

creating something that lasts.

How do you balance staying true to your roots while appealing to a diverse customer base in upstate New York? “Balancing authenticity with a diverse customer base in upstate New York has definitely been a journey — but it’s one I’ve approached with a lot of care and respect. At the core of everything I do is a commitment to staying true to my roots. I don’t water down traditional recipes or try to Americanize Mexican food. Instead, I focus on educating and inviting people into our culture through flavor, hospitality, and storytelling. We make traditional dishes — like birria and tamales— the way our families have for generations. But we also understand that some customers might be trying certain flavors or ingredients for the first time. So we take time to explain, to connect, and to share the meaning behind what we serve. That builds trust and curiosity. Ultimately, people respond to passion and realness. Whether someone grew up eating Mexican food or is discovering it now, they can tell when something is made with heart. That’s what we focus on — being real, being proud of where we come from, and welcoming everyone to the table.”

Fitness, Wellness & Bodybuilding

What inspired you to get into bodybuilding?

My journey into bodybuilding wasn’t something that happened overnight—it started after I graduated high school, and honestly, I wasn’t in a great place physically or mentally. I was overweight, tired all the time, and just didn’t feel

good in my own skin. I’d let my health slip during those years, and by the time I walked across that stage to get my diploma, I knew something had to change.It wasn’t about chasing the perfect body at first. It was about taking control of my life.At first, I just wanted to lose weight. I started small—cleaning up my diet, walking more, hitting the gym even when I didn’t feel like it. But somewhere along the way, I discovered something bigger than just weight loss: I discovered discipline. I realized that every rep, every set, every meal choice was a step toward the person I wanted to become.Bodybuilding gave me structure. It gave me purpose. Watching my body change—slowly at first, then dramatically—was empowering. The gym turned into more than a place to sweat; it became my therapy, my outlet, my arena.What inspired me most was realizing that I could build not just a better body, but a better life through consistency and effort. Seeing progress fueled me to keep going. I started looking up to athletes who had walked the same path. I started lifting not just to look better, but to push past limits I used to think were permanent. Now, I’m in it for more than aesthetics. I’m in it because bodybuilding taught me self-respect, patience, and resilience.

Competing in the NPC Greater New York Championships is no small feat — how did it feel to take home the overall wellness win? Winning the overall Wellness title at the NPC Greater New York Championships was an electrifying, emotional milestone—and so much more than just a trophy. After grinding through preparation—rigorous diet,

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“Don’t hesitate to seek support from friends, professionals, or a community, and always prioritize rest and mental well-being as part of your overall health.”

relentless training, and constant mental focus—stepping on stage under those bright lights felt like all of that finally paid off.

All the early morning workouts and late-night food prep culminated in that moment. It was proof that discipline and sacrifice truly work. This title is a stepping stone. It motivates me to refine my physique, chase bigger stages, and continue evolving as an athlete. The Wellness win at NPC Greater NY wasn’t just glory—it was a call to keep pushing limits and stay true to this path.

What type of mental and physical preparation goes into getting ready for a competition like that?

Preparing for a competition like the NPC Greater New York Championships is one of the most demanding things I’ve ever done — mentally, physically, and emotionally. People see the final stage look, but they don’t always see the months of sacrifice and discipline it takes to get there. Physically, it starts with a strict training split — weightlifting six days a week, cardio twice a day as prep intensifies, and zero room for skipping.

The diet is next-level. Every gram is measured, every meal is timed. There’s no cheating, no cutting corners. It’s about consistency, not motivation. Mentally, it’s even tougher. You’re dealing with fatigue, cravings, self-doubt, and social isolation. You’re constantly pushing past your limits — and it becomes a battle with yourself. But that’s also the beauty of it. You develop insane mental strength. You learn discipline, patience, and what it truly means to

be committed. I had to stay locked in every single day — even on the days I felt like quitting. But that’s what makes stepping on stage so meaningful. It’s not just about the body you built, it’s about the mindset you developed. That’s what keeps me going back — not just for the trophies, but for the growth.”

How do you stay motivated through the intense discipline and routine that bodybuilding requires?

“Honestly, motivation comes and goes — it’s discipline that keeps me moving. What keeps me going in bodybuilding is the reminder of where I started and why I started. I was once 220 pounds, feeling stuck and uncomfortable in my own body. Dropping to 160 and building the strength I have now wasn’t just physical — it was a full mindset shift. I don’t want to go back to that version of myself. I stay motivated by focusing on progress, not perfection. I track everything — my lifts, my meals, my mindset. Seeing small wins each day keeps me locked in. And when I hit those low days, I remind myself that not everyone is willing to do what this sport demands — and that’s what separates athletes from everyone else. Another big source of motivation is the people I inspire. My community and people who saw my transformation — they remind me that this is bigger than just me. I want to prove that with discipline, anything is possible — no matter where you’re starting from.”

What was going through your mind when you were announced as the overall winner?

“When they called my name as the

overall winner, it was honestly a mix of shock, gratitude, and pure joy. All the months of hard work, sacrifice, and pushing myself beyond limits suddenly hit me all at once. In that moment, I felt every early morning, every tough workout, every strict meal was completely worth it.There was this overwhelming sense of validation—not just for the physical transformation, but for the mental strength I had built along the way. I thought about where I started, weighing 220 pounds and feeling lost, and to be standing there, holding that title, felt surreal.At the same time, I felt incredibly grateful — for my family, my coaches, and everyone who supported me.

That win wasn’t just mine; it belonged to all of them too. It was a reminder that with discipline, determination, and a clear goal, you can overcome anything. That moment fueled my passion even more to keep growing, both on stage and off.”

Empowering Others Through Wellnes

What advice would you give to women who want to start their own wellness or fitness journey?

If you’re starting a wellness or fitness journey, begin with small, consistent steps and focus on what feels good for your body. Choose activities you enjoy, fuel yourself with nourishing foods, and remember your personal reason for starting. Avoid comparing yourself to others—everyone’s path is unique. Don’t hesitate to seek support from friends, professionals, or a community, and always prioritize rest and mental well-being as part of your overall health.

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“Honestly, motivation comes and goes — it’s discipline that keeps me moving.”

How do you manage your time between restaurant ownership and maintaining your fitness career?

One thing a lot of people don’t know about me is that I’m also a mail carrier. I started my career with USPS this past October. Balancing restaurant ownership, being a mail carrier, and maintaining a fitness career takes strong time management and discipline. I plan my days carefully, often waking up early to fit in workouts before my mail route. Evenings are focused on the restaurant, where I rely on a solid team to help things run smoothly. I stick to a routine, prepare meals ahead of time, and make sure to schedule rest. It’s all about staying organized, setting priorities, and making time for what matters—even if it means sacrificing some free time

In what ways do you believe physical wellness and personal success go hand in hand?

Physical wellness and personal success are deeply connected. When you take care of your body, you have more energy, focus, and confidence to pursue your goals. Regular exercise and healthy habits reduce stress, improve mental clarity, and build discipline—all of which translate into better performance in work and life. Feeling strong physically often leads to feeling empowered mentally, helping you show up as your best self in every area

Culture, Identity & Looking Ahead

How has your cultural background

shaped your approach to both business and personal goals?

My cultural background has taught me the value of hard work, resilience, and community—principles I carry into both business and personal goals. I was raised by parents to push through challenges, stay grounded, and always show up with purpose. Family and tradition have instilled a strong sense of responsibility and pride in everything I do, whether it’s running a business or pursuing fitness goals. Watching my father and mother work so hard every day inspires me so much. I feel so proud to be their daughter. It’s also influenced how I connect with others—building relationships, supporting my community, and leading with heart and authenticity.

What does it mean to you to represent both the Latina and fitness communities at such a high level?

Representing both the Latina and fitness communities at a high level is an honor and a responsibility I take seriously. As a Latina, I’m proud to show that our culture is rooted in strength, resilience, and passion. In the fitness world, I strive to break stereotypes and show that wellness is for everyone, regardless of background. It means being a role model—especially for young Latinas—proving that you can lead in business, stay true to your roots, and prioritize health. It’s about representation, inspiration, and opening doors for others to believe in themselves and rise.

What’s next for you — any plans for expanding your businesses, more competitions, or new ventures on the horizon?

Continuing to grow and evolve in all areas. I’m planning to compete again at a National level at the NPC Universe on July 4th. I hope to achieve my dream of earning my pro card in the future. I’ll also continue my career with USPS while balancing these passions. Long-term, I’d love to create a space—physical or online—that brings my passions together: culture, community, and health. I’m always thinking a few steps ahead, and I’m excited for what’s coming.

Proudly supporting our local community.

Five Star Bank is honored to support the YMCA of Rochester & Monroe County.

KASSY LABORIE

ORIGIN & INSPIRATION

You’re known as the “Original Virtual Training Hero.” What inspired you to step into the virtual training world so early—and make it your mission? Believe it or not, it all started with a billboard—and RuPaul. Back in 1999, I was working as a technical trainer at ExecuTrain, teaching Microsoft Office products, when I spotted a RuPaul ad for WebEx that said, “We’ve got to start meeting like this.” I thought, any company running a campaign that fun? Sign me up! I was already great at teaching software, and that moment lit the spark. That’s when I pivoted into the world of virtual training—before anyone knew what it was, let alone cared. I always say I was teaching people how to use online meeting software before it was cool. Way before. And once I saw what it could do, I never stopped.

https://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=gUmT7Ws6l1k - for fun!

Can you share the moment when you realized that virtual training wasn’t just a temporary solution— but a powerful platform for real transformation?

For me, it all came down to access. I was working on a project for families of veterans with NAMI —the National Alliance on Mental Illness—and it shifted everything. We weren’t training people to be better at their jobs. We were helping families access critical information and support they wouldn’t have had otherwise. And it hit me: this wasn’t about productivity. This was about people. About lives. Virtual

PHOTOS BY TANYA CONSAUL & EMBOLDEN

training in that moment became more than a tool—it became a lifeline. I realized then that showing up online could connect us in the most human, urgent ways. That kind of connection is transformational. And it’s why I do what I do.

You built WebEx University and helped architect Dale Carnegie’s $4 million digital business. How did those experiences shape your bold, nononsense approach to training today?

I didn’t do it alone. I had the incredible opportunity to help build WebEx University and serve on the leadership team that created Dale Carnegie Digital. Both experiences taught me that when we use technology with intention, we can truly connect with people in ways that weren’t possible before. The backdrop during those years included major world events—moments of disruption, fear, and isolation where people couldn’t travel or gather. Virtual training tools became more than just software; they

became lifelines. I saw firsthand how we could reach across screens and create real, human connection. That’s what drives my no-nonsense approach today: stop hiding behind the tech and start using it to show up, reach out, and make something meaningful happen.

THE EXPERIENCE EFFECT & FRAMEWORKS

You’ve developed several standout concepts like The Experience Effect, EP, TP, and S’UP. What inspired these and how do they transform the way people teach and learn? The Experience Effect is my signature framework—and it’s built on three core principles: EP, TP, and S’UP. Together, they transform how we design and deliver learning by focusing on real connection and presence, not just content.

EP, the Engagement Principle, came first. I was tired of watching virtual sessions filled with nothing but screenshares and words. That doesn’t engage people—it excludes them. EP is about inviting people in, coaching them through the experience, and giving them space to interact, reflect, and contribute.

TP, the Technology Principle, is all about trust. I believe in the “I got you” effect— where facilitators create psychological safety through tech confidence. If I haven’t taken the time to learn and use the tools myself, how can I ask anyone else to? We have to normalize the tech before we can make it meaningful.

S’UP, or Show Up Powerfully, came later—when I realized just how much of this work is personal. As a military

{ THE TRAINER’S TRAINER }

“I’m most passionate about the stories where lives are truly transformed, often in ways no one saw coming.”

grew up being the outsider. If I wanted to be part of something, I had to invite myself in—and that was tough. Now, I want to be the one who opens the door for others, who says “you belong here” before they even ask. And to do that, I have to show up fully, as myself. That’s what S’UP is all about.

These three principles are The Experience Effect. They guide everything I teach— because learning should feel like something worth showing up for.

What’s one of the most common mistakes people make when leading virtual sessions—and how do you help them fix it?

One of the biggest mistakes? Thinking that if you know your content really well and explain it thoroughly—while everyone stays quiet and listens—people will care. Spoiler alert: they won’t. That’s why I always start with the EP—the Engagement Principle. I ask, “What did I just say or do that I could have let my audience say or do instead?” That question flips the script. It reminds us that virtual sessions aren’t solo performances—they’re shared experiences. I coach people to stop treating their audience like passive listeners and instead invite them in. Ask a question, run a poll, use the chat, open a mic—anything that brings the room to life. When people get to be part of the story, they’ll care a whole lot more.

Your work empowers people to stop apologizing for Zoom-only sessions. Why is that mindset shift so important in today’s training landscape?

Because “Zoom-only” shouldn’t be a disclaimer—it should be a declaration.

It means access. It means inclusivity. It means connection. When done right, virtual sessions can bring together people from across time zones, abilities, and life situations. I want people to stop apologizing and start shouting it from the rooftops: we are here, together, and this is powerful. The magic isn’t in the platform -- it’s in how we use it to show up, engage, and connect.

TRAINING & ENGAGEMENT STRATEGIES

How do you help learning and development professionals move from ‘blah’ to ‘AHA!’ in their virtual presentations?

It starts with a mindset shift: lecture no more. Just talking at people isn’t training—it’s a snoozefest. I help professionals reimagine what’s possible online by teaching them to learn the tech themselves (yes, even if they have a producer!), rehearse like it matters, and build in backup plans. But most of all, I show them how to involve the audience. A virtual session isn’t a recording—it’s a real-time experience. When the audience becomes part of the session, the “blah” disappears and the “AHA!” moments come to life.

You emphasize collaboration and interaction. How do you design learning that keeps people engaged, especially in long or technical sessions?

It’s all about meaning and bravery. I design sessions around real stories and scenarios that reflect the challenges people face, so they feel seen and understood. Then, I build in opportunities for them to try things—to click, to speak, to

react—in a space where it’s safe to be a little brave. Whether the content is technical or complex, engagement happens when people feel like they matter, like their input counts, and like they’re part of something with you, not just watching you. That’s the difference between surviving a session, and actually learning from it.

You say a high “smile sheet” score isn’t enough. What does meaningful success look like in a virtual training environment?

Success isn’t just about “did they like it?” It’s about did it change anything? Meaningful training, virtual and in person, creates connection, sparks transformation, and builds true understanding. And just as importantly, it helps people know where to go next. No one learns everything in a single session, but if I can serve that moment well, make it matter, and inspire someone to keep going, then I’ve done my job. It’s an honor to be part of that process.

LEADERSHIP & IMPACT

You’re a thought leader in L&D working with global organizations and even governments. What kind of responsibility comes with that level of influence?

It means I can’t just tell people what to do—I have to do it too. I stay in the work. I keep learning new tools, trying new approaches, meeting new people, and putting myself in situations where I’m not the expert. I want to feel what it’s like to be stretched, because that’s what I’m asking others to do. I don’t see myself as someone with all the answers—I see

{ THE TRAINER’S TRAINER }

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } { QUEEN OF ARTS }

“Because even when it’s hard, and it is sometimes hard, I always end up loving it. There’s something about the challenge, the creativity, the rush of figuring it out that lights me up.”

myself as someone who’s in it alongside you, figuring it out in real time. That’s what real leadership means to me.

What’s the most memorable feedback or moment you’ve received from someone whose training was transformed by your coaching?

Her name is Amanda, and I’ll never forget what she said to me. She told me that the way I created the learning experience didn’t just help her, it inspired her entire career. She figured out what she wanted to do by watching me do it. And when I took the time to really see her, to encourage her, support her, and cheer her on, it made all the difference. I teared up when she told me. Because in that moment, I realized how powerful it can be to show up fully for someone. It’s not just about skills or delivery, it’s about the impact we have when we truly see people.

As you transition more into keynote speaking, what stories or lessons are you most passionate about sharing from the stage?

I’m most passionate about the stories where lives are truly transformed, often in ways no one saw coming. The ones where someone thought there was no hope, no connection, no way forward… and then suddenly, something shifts. A moment happens. A spark. And everything changes.

I love sharing stories where technology isn’t the barrier – it’s the bridge. Where we break through the screen and something deeply human happens on the other side. That’s the magic I want to bring to the stage. Because when people see

what’s possible—connection, healing, clarity—they don’t just leave inspired. They leave changed.

PERSONAL DRIVE & PERSPECTIVE

You bring incredible energy to everything you do. Where does that spark come from, and how do you maintain it across so many platforms and roles?

It’s the people—always the people. I light up when I help someone realize what’s possible. When they connect the dots, when they get it, when something clicks and their face lights up, that’s my fuel. The sparkles that shine through the screen when someone smiles, or that look of relief when they realize, “I can do this” that keeps me going.

But I’ll be honest, it’s not always easy. I get overwhelmed too. The tech changes fast, the expectations are high, and it can feel like a lot. In those moments, I lean on my people. We support each other, lift each other up, and remind each other why this work matters. That connection, on both sides of the screen, is what keeps the spark alive.

You’re redefining how professionals “show up” virtually and in person. What does “showing up powerfully” mean to you on a personal level? For me, it’s been a journey of realignment. I started asking myself some big questions: Am I living the life I really want? Am I showing up the way I ask others to? That reflection pushed me to make some changes, how I take care of myself, where I put my energy, and how I pursue my biggest goals.

A big part of that was finally going after my dream of being a keynote speaker. But to do that, I had to face some things that were holding me back, especially around confidence and self-worth. I realized I couldn’t ask others to show up fully if I wasn’t doing it myself. So I made the choice to stop holding back. To show up for me. That’s what “showing up powerfully” really means, being honest, being brave, and being all in.

What motivates you to keep innovating in a space that’s constantly evolving— and often under pressure to deliver quick results?

Because even when it’s hard, and it is sometimes hard, I always end up loving it. There’s something about the challenge, the creativity, the rush of figuring it out that lights me up. I thrive on the excitement of trying something new, solving a tough problem, or pulling off a session that really lands. And there’s this incredible sense of accomplishment when it all comes together. That feeling keeps me coming back, pushing forward, and asking, “What’s next?” every single time.

WRITING & CREATIVE PROCESS

Your books have become go-to guides for facilitators around the world. What was it like writing Interact and Engage! and Producing Virtual Training?

Interact and Engage! came from the question I kept hearing again and again: “But how do I actually do this online?” I wanted to create something practical, like a recipe book for virtual facilitation, something people could flip open when they needed an idea, a spark, or a plan.

{ THE TRAINER’S TRAINER }

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } { QUEEN OF ARTS }

“Find

the fun. Seriously. Try things out in a context you know and love, it’ll make learning easier, faster, and way more enjoyable.”

I’m a speaker at heart, so writing was definitely a challenge at first, I didn’t always love it! But I created a process that worked for me, and I stuck with it. I’m a finisher, and that’s how I got through it. When it was done, I felt so proud. Not just of the content, but of what it could inspire in others.

Producing Virtual Training was about shining a light on a role that had always been crucial, but often overlooked. Producers were getting side mentions in books, if that. I knew they deserved more, so I wrote the guide I wish had existed when I started training them. That book is a tribute to the power of the people behind the scenes who help make virtual magic happen.

If you could give every new trainer or presenter just one piece of advice from your books, what would it be? Find the fun. Seriously. Try things out in a context you know and love, it’ll make learning easier, faster, and way more enjoyable. When I wanted to understand how ChatGPT worked, I didn’t start with something dry. I asked it, “If Vintage Barbie were a webinar presenter, what would she be like?” I happen to be a longtime collector, a former VP of the San Francisco Barbie Doll Club, and I know everything about

those dolls, so I could instantly tell what the AI was getting right, and what it was making up. It helped me learn the tool because I was having fun with it. That’s my advice: make it yours. Whatever tool, method, or platform you’re learning—find a way to make it meaningful, personal, and fun. That’s where the magic (and the growth) happens.

not just content. Who make people feel seen, heard, and empowered in every interaction, whether in person or through a screen.

As for my legacy? I hope people remember that I made learning feel possible, and even fun. That I helped others show up more fully, speak more confidently, and connect more meaningfully. I want to be known not just for what I taught, but for how I made people feel: supported, included, and inspired to rise to their own potential.

FUTURE & LEGACY

Looking ahead, what’s your vision for the future of training and development—and how do you hope your legacy will shape it?

I want the future of training to be deeply human. We’ve spent years chasing tools, platforms, and productivity—and while those matter, they aren’t the heart of it. The future belongs to trainers and facilitators who create experiences—

And if I can leave a little glitter behind while doing it? Even better.

“ I want to be KNOWN not just for what I taught, but for how I made PEOPLE

FEEL: supported, included, and inspired to rise to their own POTENTIAL.”

THE BOX: ANCIENT WISDOM MEETS MODERN REALITIES

BY KASSY LABORIE, THE TRAINERS TRAINER I PHOTO BY EMBOLDEN

Did you know that during medieval times, people used to sleep in boxes? Not metaphorical ones - literal, wooden enclosures called box-beds, built into walls or freestanding with doors or curtains to shut out cold drafts, noise, and even nosy neighbors. These boxes offered warmth, security, and a cozy sense of privacy in homes often shared with extended family, or even livestock.

As homes evolved with better heating and design, the need for these sleeping boxes faded, and open beds became the norm. We moved away from the boxes, embracing more space, freedom, and air.

The irony isn’t lost on me. Early in my career, “Think outside the box” was the rallying cry. It meant shaking off convention, defying the status quo, and expanding creativity. It was our badge of honor in the business world, shorthand for boundary-breaking brilliance.

But March 2020 arrived, and suddenly, so many of us found ourselves back in boxes. Not wooden ones, but digital ones, tiny squares on Zoom and Teams, each a window into someone’s world.

In those virtual boxes, we worked, connected, learned, and celebrated. Some of us thrived in that structured grid; others felt confined by its limits. We experienced weddings, birthdays, and hard goodbyes inside these boxes. We led meetings, taught classes, and built businesses, all from inside a glowing rectangle.

And now, as we continue through 2025, I can’t help but ask:

Are these boxes still serving us?

Are they providing clarity, structure, and safety? Or are they now limiting our potential, creativity, and connection?

Maybe this month’s Spark isn’t about choosing inside or outside the box – it’s about understanding when the box serves us and when it doesn’t. It’s about recognizing that structure can offer comfort and clarity… until it doesn’t anymore.

I think about the medieval families who built those box-beds for warmth and security, only to one day realize they no longer needed them. In the same way, we created our digital boxes to stay connected during a time of global isolation, and many of us still rely on them for community and business. But is it time to crack the door open a bit wider?

When I lead virtual trainings or speak on stages, I see this question playing out everywhere. Some people are at their most creative inside the structure of a screen, leveraging tools to reach audiences they could never reach in person. Others are craving in-person moments to spark connection in ways only a room full of people can provide.

The key isn’t to reject the box entirely or cling to it out of habit. The key is to use it as a tool, not a cage.

Ask yourself:

● Where do I feel most alive and creative – inside or outside the box?

● Where am I hiding behind the box out of fear or comfort?

● Where might the box give me clarity and focus I can’t find elsewhere?

As we reimagine connection in a world that is both digital and in-person, let’s use the boxes wisely, knowing when to step in for structure and when to step out for expansion.

Because the real power isn’t in the box itself, it’s in our awareness of how we use it.

So, where do you feel most creative – inside or outside the box? I’d love to hear your reflections and stories. Let’s spark a conversation.

Kassy LaBorie is The Trainer’s Trainer - a keynote speaker, author, and expert in connection and presence in a tech-filled world. She helps professionals design engaging experiences, on screen and off, that spark real human connection. Learn more at kassylaborie.com.

TRISH MOCK & GOOD PSYCHE

Good Psyche was born from a life lived in motion—across cities, industries, and ideas—and a desire to come home to something more rooted, intentional, and deeply personal. Founder [Name] grew up in Pittsford, NY, but spent nearly two decades away, building a career in corporate roles with companies like Amazon and Deloitte while living in Washington D.C., Los Angeles, and Austin. Yet, entrepreneurship was always the destination. “I knew I had to be my own boss to thrive,” she says. “I needed the breathing room to be inventive, and I’m drawn to a certain level of risk.”

The spark for Good Psyche came from two places: her own journey with mental health and the influence of her mother, Shannon, a board-certified herbalist and owner of a regenerative medicinal herb farm in Geneseo, NY. Growing up around Traditional Chinese Medicine and plant-based healing, she saw firsthand how herbs could restore balance— internally and externally. Her vision became clear: to create a “wellbeauty” brand that honored ancient wisdom while addressing modern emotional, mental, and physical needs. The result is a line of ingestible and topical products that are as therapeutic as they are luxurious, designed to support both the psyche and the skin.

Kanna, Tremella, and Blue Lotus—what she calls the “ancient GOATs” (greatest of all time). These ingredients, revered for centuries in different corners of the world, became the cornerstone of Good Psyche’s formulations. Launching at SXSW was a defining moment, but ultimately, the pull home was stronger.

Returning to Western New York wasn’t just a personal decision—it was a brand one. The sweeping beauty of the Genesee Valley, the history-laden landscapes,

Can you tell us a little about your background and what led you to create Good Psyche?

Her years in Austin proved pivotal, immersing her in a wellness-forward culture where experimentation was encouraged and ancient plant remedies were embraced. It was there she began working with distinctive botanicals like

and the proximity to her mother’s farm gave Good Psyche its anchor. “With so many internet-born brands, I wanted one rooted in a real place,” she explains. That grounding in place and heritage shapes everything, from ingredient sourcing to the brand’s heirloomcore philosophy—favoring timelessness, integrity, and durability over fast trends. In every product, Good Psyche blends ritual and efficacy, honoring the past while offering tools for a calmer, more balanced present.

Personal Journey & Brand Origins

I grew up in Pittsford but spent 18 years away for college and career. I spent several years in corporate roles at companies like Amazon and Deloitte, living in Washington DC, LA, and Austin. But it was always a means to an end. Entrepreneurship was alluring because I knew I had to be my own boss to thrive. I needed the breathing room to be inventive, and I’m drawn to a certain level of risk. Good Psyche was largely inspired by my mother and her medicinal herb farm in Geneseo, where she practices Traditional Chinese Medicine. Her knowledge of plant medicine informed the ingredients we use. The products reflect my vision for a “wellbeauty” brand that serves both internal and external needs, and are a manifestation of my own desire to heal and care for my mental and emotional well-being through more organic means. You’ll see this concept of wellbeauty in the product line, which includes a mix of ingestible and topical solutions.

What was the moment or experience that sparked the idea for launching a “well beauty” brand?

I told myself I didn’t want to bring anything to market that was just added noise and waste. Originally, I thought it would be a skincare brand, but that didn’t go deep enough for me. I wanted to create something well-rounded, something that drew from wisdom and traditions much older than us. My own

{ GOOD PSYCHE

“Good Psyche’s identity is strongly influenced by the visuals in Geneseo, so it made sense to immerse the brand in that environment.”

struggles with mental health led me down a path of alternative medicine, and in that exploration, I discovered plants that could change the chemistry of your brain and create new neural pathways. This was a completely different approach to emotional well-being, and I needed to share it with more people. The name Good Psyche has a double meaning. The first is the most literal: we are all seeking a healthy, balanced, resilient mindset. The other draws from one of my favorite stories in Greek mythology—Cupid and Psyche, where Psyche’s beauty, curiosity, and vulnerability captivated Cupid. Good Psyche is well beauty.

How did your time in Austin, TX shape your perspective on wellness and entrepreneurship before returning to Western NY?

One of the great things about Austin is its focus on health and wellness. Everyone is into optimizing their well-being, and they’re open to exploring all sorts of treatments, supplements, and practices, both new and old. It allowed me to test how some of the lesser-known plant ingredients in our products would be received. That culture of experimentation also pushed me to use plants that were outside of the mainstream, like Kanna and Blue Lotus. I’m grateful to have had the supportive environment to build something truly unique, and to launch at a festival like SXSW was a dream. I don’t think Good Psyche would be what it is today if I hadn’t been in Austin at the time.

What inspired your decision to make the “urban exodus” back to Fall Brook Farms and plant your business there?

I wanted to bring the brand home to the place that inspired it. Good Psyche’s identity is strongly influenced by the visuals in Geneseo, so it made sense to immerse the brand in that environment. Personally, I was craving a different lifestyle. I realized that my priorities had shifted. I wanted the small town way of life. I wanted more land. I wanted to live in a place with history. And most of all, I wanted to be close to my mom, her knowledge, and the farm.

Rooted in Place & Heritage

How has growing up in Rochester and returning to Genesee Valley influenced your approach to healing and formulation?

Growing up in Rochester and returning to the Genesee Valley has deeply influenced my approach to healing and formulation. The natural beauty and slower pace of life here, coupled with my mother’s regenerative herb farm, have instilled in me a respect for nature’s wisdom and the importance of balance. I’ve learned that true healing comes from working with the earth, not against it, and this philosophy shapes how I create products. By blending ancient plant knowledge with modern science, I aim to develop holistic formulations that honor tradition while addressing the needs of today’s wellness-conscious consumers.

Your mother, Shannon, plays a major role in the herbal legacy behind Good Psyche. How has her influence shaped your work?

As a board-certified herbalist, she provides consultation on our ingredient stacks,

drawing from TCM. For example, one of the star ingredients in both Sidekick and Glisten Up is Schisandra, an adaptogenic berry that offers powerful benefits whether used topically or ingested. I also learn a lot from her regenerative farming techniques. Regenerative farming attempts to copy natural systems. It differs from organic farming, which focuses solely on the absence of chemical fertilizers and pesticides. Regenerative farming focuses on evaluating each parcel of land and determining what it needs to return it to a state of homeostasis, much like what our ingredients do for you. These methods go beyond their literal application, offering me crucial lessons in business and life. I write about regenerative farming in Good Psyche’s blog, The Good Journal.

What role does the Western New York landscape play in your product development or inspiration?

This area has so much natural beauty that I never fully appreciated until I moved back. The lakes, valleys, and waterfalls are constant reminders that we exist within natural systems far greater than us. The old homesteads, main streets, and equestrian traditions have always captivated me as slices of history—times when things moved more slowly, with more intention, focus, and integrity. A huge part of Good Psyche’s ethos is reverence for things much older than us. That’s how I chose the three “ancient GOATs” (greatest of all time) in our first product line: Kanna, a succulent plant used for thousands of years by the oldest civilizations on Earth; Tremella, a mushroom used by the great beauties of Ancient China; and Blue Lotus flower,

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“Good Psyche was largely inspired by my mother and her medicinal herb farm in Geneseo, where she practices Traditional Chinese Medicine.”

a water lily historically grown along the banks of the Nile and used in ceremony by the Ancient Egyptians.

Why was it important to you that your brand remain deeply connected to this region?

It was important to me that GP have an anchor. With so many internet-born brands out there, I wanted to build something that was rooted in a real place. Having ties to a real place, a real community with real people, keeps us grounded and honest.

Brand Philosophy & Formulations

Good Psyche blends ancient herbal traditions with modern science. How do you balance those two worlds in your products?

There’s definitely a learning curve, both internally and for our customers. We are providing ancient solutions to modern problems, and that requires a deep understanding of our customers’ core needs and behaviors, and create a pathway that guides them to our products.

Can you tell us more about the hero ingredients in your products and how they help regulate stress, mood, and skin health?

The “ancient GOATs” in our product line are Kanna, a succulent plant used for thousands of years by the oldest civilizations on Earth; Tremella, a mushroom used by the great beauties of Ancient China; and Blue Lotus flower, a water lily historically grown along the banks of the Nile and used in ceremony by the Ancient Egyptians.

Kanna, or Sceletium Tortuosum, is a safe and effective plant known for its ability to regulate the central nervous system, open your heart, and help you feel more at peace. Kanna has long been said to relieve feelings of overwhelm and enable a “glass half-full” perspective due to key alkaloids mesembrine and mesembrenone. Mesembrine is thought to act as a Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor (SSRI), without the negative side effects commonly associated with pharmaceutical antidepressants. Kanna is an empathogen, which means it can help you feel more empathic. It’s also neuroregenerative, helping generate new pathways for neurotransmitters and working on serotonin and GABA receptors. It provides a range of physical benefits, such as increasing stamina, reducing pain, suppressing appetite, and curbing hedonic cravings for salt, sugar, and fat. Kanna is also safe, legal, and non-habit forming.

And one of the coolest things about Kanna is that because it’s a heart-opening empathogen, it’s very PROSOCIAL, which is what makes it a great vicereplacement to use in social settings. Tremella mushroom or tremella fuciformis, also called the beauty shroom, silver ear, or snow mushroom, has long been revered for its ultra-hydrating properties, dating back centuries in traditional Chinese medicine. Tremella’s ability to absorb and retain moisture is unparalleled, making it a superior hydrating agent for the skin. Unlike other moisturizing ingredients, tremella absorbs deeply into your skin, leaving you with smooth, plump skin that feels hydrated throughout the day.

Blue Lotus Flower (Nymphaea caerulea) is a perennial water lily historically found along the Nile River and in parts of Northern Africa and Asia. It was prominently featured as a ceremonial plant in Egyptian hieroglyphics dating back to the 14th century BC. Known for promoting calm, clarity, and a gentle euphoria, Blue Lotus is a powerful ingredient. It contains two alkaloids, apomorphine and nuciferine. Apomorphine is a dopamine agonist, contributing to Blue Lotus’s euphoric effects when smoked or steeped. Nuciferine, a dopamine receptor modulator, contributes to the plant’s sedative, anti-anxiety properties, reducing mental and physical tension and easing stress or overstimulation. Blue Lotus has been used as an aphrodisiac in traditional medicine for thousands of years and is also known to induce lucid dreaming. It’s an incredible combination of ancient ritual that meets modern day demands.

Your products feel both luxurious and therapeutic—how important was it to create that sensory and emotional experience?

I want Good Psyche to feel like a ritual that’s indulgent yet serves a very practical role for your well-being. It’s important that the taste, smell, and sensation of the products elicit a feeling of being fully present with yourself.

What makes Good Psyche different from other “clean beauty” or wellness brands currently on the market?

Everything from the way we source our ingredients to our formulas, packaging, and branding is intentionally created with longevity in mind. I talk a lot about

“Originally, I thought it would be a skincare brand, but that didn’t go deep enough for me. I wanted to create something well-rounded, something that drew from wisdom and traditions much older than us.” {

the concept of “heirloomcore” which is the antithesis of today’s TikTok brands. Heirloomcore values timeless, premodern influences—think understated elegance, durability, and sentimental value—over fast, cheap novelties. That’s what Good Psyche represents.

Wellness Movement & Broader Impact

There’s a growing national interest in herbal medicine and ancient healing practices—why do you think that is?

People are tired of being told that their only option is the pharmaceutical route. Pharma has an important place in our healthcare system, but it isn’t the only tool in your belt. These plants and fungi have been used for hundreds or thousands of years, and most people are relieved to learn how safe many of them are. Unlike the laundry list of side effects that often come with pharmaceutical drugs, many plants from TCM or Ayurveda have little to no contraindications and are safe for daily use. There’s a movement to demystify plants and fungi, and leaning into these tried and true alternatives is critical for our long-term well-being. There’s a movement of demystifying plants and fungi right now, and leaning into these alternative options is critical to our ability to be well long into the future.

What does it mean to you to create a values-driven business, especially as a woman entrepreneur from this region?

Women entrepreneurs are more likely to invest in their own communities through small businesses, nonprofits, and local initiatives. I strongly believe in my role as a female founder to prioritize local, grassroots initiatives, education, and to empower other women to pursue entrepreneurship. Good Psyche is fueled by our community, and with integrity as our backbone, my goal is not only to invest through our financial success but also to produce what’s called “social ROI,” a return on causes that drive long-term, sustainable improvements to community culture and development.

What advice would you give to other women looking to create mindful, intentional brands that also reflect who they are?

Focus on what you can do better and differently for a gap in the market, and go for it. Start with the lowestcost prototype and test it with anyone and everyone as you learn who your customers are. You have to be in love with what you’re building or with the pursuit of success—ideally both—because you will face more challenges than you ever could have imagined. I write candidly about my best and worst investments in year one in business on my Substack, Mall Talk.

Recognition & Future Vision

How did it feel to be recently featured in The Strategist by NYMag, and what has that national exposure meant for your business?

It was an incredible surprise that drove three months’ worth of sales in just one week. I’m glad there’s still something to be said for the weight of a reputable outlet. We even had a few celebrity names on the list of orders, which was exciting to see.

What’s next for Good Psyche—are there new product lines, partnerships, or events on the horizon you’re excited about?

I’m always looking for clever and meaningful ways to collaborate with other brands or creators. We have some exciting projects coming up that I’ll be thrilled to reveal this Fall. 2026 is the year for new additions to our product line, and you can anticipate more plants you haven’t heard of and wellness experiences that will find a home in your daily rituals.

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TAKE HER SEAT: WHEN WOMEN SPEAK, ENERGY SHIFTS

BY DR PAM DENTON I PHOTO BY KATRINA GRADY

In March at LeadHERship, something happened that neither Kelly nor I had ever seen before.

We stepped onto the stage with the intention to host a conversation, but instead of delivering a talk with a tidy “1-2-3” framework or a set agenda, we decided to take a radical leap. We removed the structure, set aside the script, and created space for something far more alive.

Before we invited others to speak, we spoke from our hearts — sharing openly what we were seeing and feeling as women in this moment in time. We talked about the weight and beauty of leadership, the fatigue that can come from constant change, the quiet fears, the fierce hopes. We let ourselves be seen first, not as facilitators or experts, but as women navigating the same shifting ground as everyone else in the room. We called it Take HER Seat — and after setting that tone, we handed the mic to the women in the room.

What unfolded over the next hour was nothing short of transformational.

A Different Kind of Leadership Space

Most leadership events are built on a formula: a speaker, a presentation, some audience interaction, maybe a panel. You learn, you take notes, you leave with a few action steps.

But Take HER Seat was different from the moment we began. There was no “expert” talking at the group. There was no hierarchy. We were not the center of the conversation — the women in the room were.

We invited them to speak from where they

were, right now, in their leadership and their lives. Not the polished, LinkedInready version of themselves, but the real, raw, unfiltered truth.

The Vocal Cascade

One by one, women stepped forward. Some hesitated, clutching the mic for a moment before the words began to flow. Others leapt in with urgency, as if they’d been waiting their whole lives to speak these truths out loud.

They shared deeply vulnerable and transformative moments:

• Fears about the unknown.

• Triumphs hard-earned through persistence and grit.

• The messy middle of reinvention.

• Career transitions, new launches, and bold next steps.

• Personal losses, health challenges, and the resilience they were building.

It was more than a circle of conversation — it became a vocal cascade of transformative energy. Each woman’s story became fuel for the next. Every word spoken gave permission for deeper truth. The collective field shifted.

You could feel it in the air: that moment when people stop performing and start connecting, when the walls drop and what’s real comes rushing in.

Why This Matters Now

We are living in an era where the ground beneath us feels unstable. The pace of change in our work, our communities, and the world at large is relentless. The pressure to keep up, to perform, to “have it all together” has never been higher. For women leaders, the stakes are even greater. We are expected to lead with

empathy while producing results, to innovate while managing burnout, to care for others while ignoring our own needs. It’s a paradox that’s unsustainable. In this climate, spaces like Take HER Seat aren’t just nice to have — they are essential.

When women are given a safe space to speak openly about their challenges and dreams, something remarkable happens:

• The isolation breaks.

• The stigma around vulnerability disappears.

• Leadership becomes more human, more connected, and more visionary.

The Energy Shift

What happened in that room was not just emotional — it was energetic. As each woman spoke, you could feel the resonance ripple through the group. Stories of courage inspired others to take bolder action. Admissions of fear made others feel less alone.

This is what I mean when I talk about The Woo of Business — the unseen but deeply felt energetic forces that shape how we show up, connect, and lead. When we clear what’s heavy — the shame, the self-doubt, the fear — we make room for innovation, creativity, and collective strength. That’s what happened in March. That’s what happens every time women gather in this way.

Acknowledging the Full Human Experience

Part of the magic of Take HER Seat was that there was no pressure to “tie it up with a bow.” No one was required to present a perfect ending or a solved problem.

{ INNOVATE HER }

“Take HER Seat — a live, open-circle conversation where women speak from the heart, share their truth, and spark collective transformation.”

We cried our tears, we spoke our truth, we acknowledged what was real. And in doing so, we created a level of trust and connection that no business card exchange or networking cocktail hour could ever match.

This is leadership at its most powerful: honest, grounded, and deeply human.

From Conversation to Action

While the space was designed for sharing, it was not passive. Each woman who spoke left the room with more than just empathy — she left with new perspectives, resources, and in many cases, a renewed commitment to take action.

Some committed to making longoverdue changes in their businesses.

Others decided to launch new projects or reach out for the collaborations they’d been putting off.

A few shared that simply speaking their truth in front of peers was the most freeing and energizing act they’d taken in years.

Why We’ll Keep Doing This Kelly and I walked away from that day knowing that Take HER Seat was not a one-time experiment — it was the start of a movement. We saw firsthand how powerful it is when women take the mic, not to follow a formula, but to speak from the heart.

We’ll keep creating spaces like this because leadership is not just about strategy, it’s about connection. It’s about building trust in real time,

breaking the silence around the hard stuff, and celebrating the wins — no matter how small or big.

An Invitation

If you are a woman leader, entrepreneur, or change-maker who feels the weight of these times, this is your invitation. Take HER Seat is not about having it all figured out. It’s about showing up as you are, with your voice, your truth, and your willingness to listen to others doing the same.

It’s about knowing that reinvention is possible, that self-care is nonnegotiable, and that when we share our stories, we create ripples of change far beyond the room.

This is more than conversation. This is leadership in its most essential form — collective, courageous, and alive. When women speak, energy shifts. When energy shifts, possibilities multiply.

And when possibilities multiply, change is inevitable.

Take HER seat. Your voice matters. Come Join Us — November 9

InnovateHER Leadership Retreat: Take HER Seat

This is a full-day immersive retreat designed for women ready to step into the next level of leadership, authenticity, and community.

HER stands for Heart Energy Reprogramming — the powerful, transformative process at the core

of this experience. Together, we’ll:

• Take HER Seat — a live, open-circle conversation where women speak from the heart, share their truth, and spark collective transformation.

• Reprogram your energy for clarity, confidence, and inspired action.

• Connect with other visionary women committed to leading with authenticity and courage.

This is your space to reinvent, recharge, and rise — surrounded by women who see you, hear you, and are ready to stand with you.

Date: Saturday, November 9

Location: TBA when you purchase ticket. Private

Time: Full Day Retreat 11am-4pm Seats are limited. Claim yours and be part of the energy shift we all need right now.

TINA MYERS

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

Tina Myers – Redefining Strength, Inside and Out

Tina Myers is a powerhouse in every sense of the word—physically, mentally, and professionally. With a background that spans from elite physique and bodybuilding coaching to high-performance transformation coaching, speaking, authorship, and podcasting, Tina has built her career on one unwavering principle: relentless action. She’s not about hype or quick fixes—her mission is to transform lives from the inside out, equipping people with the mindset, discipline, and structure needed to win in every area of life.

At 54, Tina is living proof that age is not a limitation but an advantage when paired with resilience, grit, and clarity of purpose. Through her brands Interior Design Nutrition, LLC and Action Over Age, she’s helped high achievers— from athletes to corporate leaders—shatter mental barriers, execute with precision, and rise above excuses. Whether she’s coaching, on stage delivering a keynote, co-hosting the More Than Muscles podcast, or preparing for her next bodybuilding competition, Tina leads by example, showing that true transformation happens when you align your identity with your actions.

What sparked this evolution?

My journey started with coaching, but I quickly realized the real transformation wasn’t just about reps or meal plans. People weren’t failing because they lacked a training routine or nutrition advice. They were failing because of mental noise, deeply rooted excuses, and a lack of systems for follow-through. That was the spark. I saw that I wasn’t just training bodies...I was reshaping belief systems, building discipline, and teaching

born from the truth that the real work is internal. I’m not here to slap a meal plan on someone and hope it sticks. I’m here to redesign the internal structure, the habits, the mindset, the accountability. Action Over Age became the rally cry. It’s the community and movement for high performers who are ready to refuse average, regardless of age. Both brands reflect my mission: relentless action, internal transformation, and lasting results.

them how to execute no matter what. Becoming a speaker was the natural next step. I had something to say, and I knew it could move people to take action where motivation had failed.

Can you share your journey from physique and bodybuilding coaching to becoming a high-performance transformation coach and speaker?

What inspired you to launch Interior Design Nutrition, LLC and Action Over Age? How do these brands reflect your mission?

Interior Design Nutrition, LLC was

Your motto is “No fluff, no hype, just relentless action.” What does that look like in practice— for both you and your clients? It means we don’t wait for motivation. We create results through structure, execution, and discipline. For me, it’s being up at 4:30 AM, hitting my macros, showing up when it’s uncomfortable, and building even when I’m grieving or exhausted. For my clients, it means tracking, checking in, holding the line, and moving even when life throws curveballs. We don’t coddle. We course-correct and continue.

You’re a powerful advocate for pushing past mental barriers. What are some of the most common mental blocks you see high achievers struggle with, and how do you help them break through? The biggest blocks I see? Perfectionism. Overthinking. “All or nothing” thinking. And guilt. High achievers often believe if they can’t do it perfectly, they shouldn’t do it at all. I help them rewire that with execution frameworks, mindset work, and relentless accountability. We replace

“At 54, I’m prepping for the biggest show of my career, co-hosting a podcast, building a speaking career, and releasing a book. I’ve earned every scar and every rep.”

overwhelm with clarity. Perfection with consistency. Guilt with data. We get out of the head and into motion.

At 54, you embody the philosophy that success and peak performance have no expiration date. What does “Action Over Age” mean to you personally? It means refusing to hand your power over to a birth certificate. It means showing up fully, muscular, unapologetic, and still rising. At 54, I’m prepping for the biggest show of my career, cohosting a podcast, building a speaking career, and releasing a book. I’ve earned every scar and every rep. Action Over Age isn’t just a brand, it’s who I am.

You speak often about accountability, structure, and execution being more important than motivation. Why do you believe these pillars are non-negotiable for lasting success? Because motivation is a liar. It shows up when it wants to. But structure and execution? That’s how you build anything of substance. Accountability is the glue. When you know someone’s watching, when you have a system and a timeline, you execute. That’s how you win, especially on the days you don’t feel like it.

What is the Lifescale Ascend Program, and how does it help your clients elevate their lives—physically, mentally, and professionally?

Lifescale Ascend is a one-year transformation container for high performers. It’s not a “lose 10 pounds” program, it’s an identity shift. We scale structure, level up execution, optimize nutrition and training, and anchor everything to mindset. Clients walk

out with more confidence, more clarity, and results they didn’t think were possible, physically and professionally.

You’ve worked with everyone from high-performance athletes to corporate leaders. What consistent traits do the most successful individuals share? They don’t wait for perfect conditions. They act. They fail fast, adjust quickly, and execute regardless of how they feel. They value feedback, crave structure, and surround themselves with people who challenge them. Success leaves clues, and the biggest one is execution over excuses.

What do you say to someone who’s “tired of spinning their wheels” but isn’t sure where to start in taking meaningful action?

Start with one thing. You’re not stuck, you’re undisciplined. You know EXACTLY what to do. Choose one area: food, fitness, schedule, or sleep. Track it. Master it. Stack from there. You don’t need more information. You need direction and accountability. And that starts the moment you decide to move.

How has your own personal mindset evolved through your life and career— from competitor to coach to speaker? At first, I thought I had to prove myself through perfection. As a competitor, it was about appearance. As a coach, it became about leadership. Now as a speaker, it’s about service. I no longer chase validation, I stand in conviction. The more I’ve evolved, the more I’ve realized my voice is my weapon and my story is my power.

You emphasize mental resilience and grit in your keynotes. Can you

share a moment in your life where your own resilience was truly tested?

Last year, I lost three family members in five months. Grief doesn’t care about your goals. But I didn’t fold, I kept building. I launched programs, coached clients, trained daily, and wrote a book. My resilience was tested not in one moment, but in the choice to rise, over and over again, in the silence between the pain.

You’ve built a multifaceted platform— from coaching and speaking to podcasting and authorship. How do you stay aligned and avoid burnout? Clarity and boundaries. I don’t do fluff. Everything I build aligns with one mission: transformation through discipline and grit. I calendar with intention. I train daily to protect my mind. And I constantly audit what’s moving the needle. If it doesn’t serve the mission, it’s a no.

How do you define success today, and how has that definition changed over the years?

Success used to be tied to a number, on a scale, in a bank account, or on a stage. Today, it’s alignment. It’s knowing I’m living in my purpose, showing up for my people, and becoming the version of me I used to dream about. Success is when who you are and how you show up are the same.

What do you believe sets your approach apart in the often-saturated world of fitness and personal development coaching?

I don’t sell hype. I deliver structure. I’m not here for viral trends or shortterm sprints. I coach for sustainability, strategy, and identity shift. Most programs

{ SHE SPEAKS

“I had something to say, and I knew it could move people to take action where motivation had failed.”

stop at macros and workouts. Mine go deeper, into belief systems, execution strategy, and identity engineering.

As a female entrepreneur, what have been some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced—and how did you overcome them? Being underestimated. Being told to “soften” my approach. I don’t fit the typical mold, and I never will. I overcame it by owning my difference. I embraced my muscularity, my intensity, my directness, and built a brand around it. The right people will never be threatened by your strength.

What message do you have for women over 40 or 50 who feel like they’ve missed their shot at reinvention or greatness? You’re not too late, you’re just getting started. The fire you feel? That’s not midlife crisis. That’s your calling waking up. Reinvention isn’t reserved for the young. It’s for the ready. And you are more than ready, you’re equipped. Rise up.

The seed is already in you. But yes, it can be taught, if you’re coachable. Mindset is like a muscle. If you’re willing to be uncomfortable, to be held accountable, and to do the work, you can develop the grit and

discipline of an elite performer. But no one can want it for you.

So much. My next competition is in December and my brother and I are going to try to make history as the first brother sister duo earning their pro cards in the same show. My debut book Shadow & Strength: The Battle Between Who You Are and Who You’re Meant to Be drops in early 2026. I’m expanding my Lifescale Ascend program, continuing to grow the More Than Muscles podcast with my brother, and booking speaking stages nationwide. I’m not just building a brand, I’m building a movement.

You speak to elite performers, but do you believe this mindset can be taught to anyone? Or is it something people have to discover within themselves?

What’s next for Tina Myers? Are there any upcoming projects, events, or releases you’re especially excited about?

“JUST BREATHE… WE’VE GOT YOU”

BY JOANNE RYAN

When a family walks through the doors of Ronald McDonald House Charities of Rochester, they aren’t just arriving at a place to stay, they’re arriving at a place of refuge, understanding, and hope. We become their port in a storm. For a parent whose child is critically ill or injured, every minute carries the weight of uncertainty, exhaustion, and emotional strain. That’s why at RMHCR, we know: Minutes Matter.

The first person a family encounters, whether arriving for the first time or returning after a long, emotional day at the hospital, is a team member entrusted with the delicate task of welcoming them not just with a smile, but with empathy, flexibility, and a readiness to meet them exactly where they are. Whether it’s a late-night admission following an emergency transfer or a weary parent returning after 14 hours at their child’s ICU bedside, these are the moments that matter most, and they must be met with compassion, gentleness, grace, and unwavering care. For us here in Rochester, this role is filled by Lyndee Knowlton, House Program Coordinator at 333Westmoreland House and Ashley Smith, House Program Coordinator at the House within the Hospital located on the 5th floor at Strong Memorial Hospital.

Every RMHC House is different, tailored to the unique needs of the communities they serve. But one universal truth exists across all locations: the check-in process and the daily returns to the House are emotionally significant moments for families. The staff who welcome our families must bring a unique skill set,

one that allows for real-time adaptability to meet each family exactly where they are in that moment.

Both Lyndee and Ashley shared that even though these can be the most challenging moments they navigate, they are also the most rewarding. To know that you really made a difference in that person’s life by offering a hot meal, a warm bed, a safe space to be vulnerable, cry, or just be heard is a very powerful way to provide care and comfort.

Team members like Lyndee and Ashley are featured in this month’s article for their outstanding dedication at the front line of our mission. They do far more than offer keys and tour hallways. They listen, observe, and respond intuitively to unspoken needs. Some families arrive overwhelmed and silent. Others arrive mid-crisis, needing immediate support, reassurance, or simply someone to sit with them. In every case, Lyndee and Ashley meet families exactly where they are, grounded in compassion and guided by empathy, often offering a gentle reminder: ‘Just breathe… we’ve got you.’

“It’s not just about asking how they are,” says Lyndee. “It’s about asking how they are ‘today’ or ‘right now.’ It is so important to pay close attention to body language, tone, and even the pace of how someone is moving. Parents will often look like they’ve held their breath all day, we make space for them to exhale.” And yet, “I am often surprised by the strength of families even in the middle of a crisis,” says Ashley.

At RMHCR, family needs can shift by the hour and sometimes by the minute. One day, a family may want privacy. The next day, they may need connection, they may even need a hug. “I will always ask first, but often a hug is just what they need,” says Ashley. Lyndee shares that one of the most gratifying parts of her job is the connection she makes with families who will often seek her out to be sure to share updates, both good and bad “…they see me as someone to talk to and even cry with.”

Lyndee reflects on this flexibility: “Every interaction is unique. I try not to assume anything. A parent who was laughing and chatting yesterday might be devastated today. Our job is to see them, hear them, and meet that need in the now. And know how to shift our level of involvement and support as their needs shift.”

This moment-by-moment responsiveness is what sets RMHCR apart. Staff and volunteers are trained to offer personalized support through orientation, family programming, meal services, transportation help, wellness spaces, and more. Yet, it’s the personal presence that often leaves the deepest impact.

“It’s the moment someone walks in, and we remember their name. Or when we have fresh cookies waiting,” Ashley adds. “It’s showing that we care, not just about their child’s health, but about the family as a unit. This job aligns with my personal goal of helping people, which is why I love it so much.”

While RMHCR will always provide essential comforts such as clean rooms,

{ MINUTES MATTER }

“We are proud to support our families and humbled to participate in their journey. It is truly an honor to welcome families into our Houses, and a gift to have such an extraordinary team there to greet them with open hearts.”

nutritious meals, shuttle rides, and laundry access, it’s the emotional and psychosocial support, offered by our dedicated team from the moment of check-in through every step of a family’s stay, that truly defines our care. It’s taking the time to get to know the family so well that you can begin to anticipate their needs. Upon arrival, team members help orient families to the House. But they also gently assess: What might this family need today? What services might help them tomorrow? Whether it’s connecting them to respite programming, family support groups, spiritual care, sibling activities, or simply ensuring they eat a hot meal, these are the details that are tailored with care, compassion and intention.

At its heart, RMHCR is a mission of presence. It’s about being there for families during the worst and sometimes best moments of their lives. The team members who greet families at the door are not just employees. They are the first threads in a blanket of comfort and support.

“Sometimes I think, if this were my child, how would I want someone to treat me?” Lyndee reflects. “And then I do that.”

Because this role is such an essential frontline support, Lyndee and Ashley are often the first to greet families after a medical emergency, a traumatic update, or even the unimaginable loss of a child. When a family returns to the House to gather their belongings before going home without their child, it becomes one of the most painful and sacred

responsibilities a team member can face. “It is by far the hardest part of this work,” Lyndee shares quietly. “You can’t fix it. You can’t offer comfort in the way you wish you could. But you can hold space. You can honor that child. You can honor that family. You can be still with them in their grief.”

“It’s a moment that changes everyone in the room. And it’s also a moment that reminds us how deeply this work matters,” shares Ashley.

We understand that to successfully provide this level of daily emotional support, team members must also care for themselves. Supporting families in crisis, especially through trauma and loss, requires resilience and strength, but also vulnerability and reflection. At RMHCR, we prioritize mental wellness and self-care for our staff, understanding that their ability to show up for families begins with how well they’re supported themselves.

Both Lyndee and Ashley agree that “… self-care isn’t optional in this work. It’s a necessity.” They take time to process, talk with their peers, and give themselves grace. That is one way to stay healthy enough to support the next family.

RMHCR also encourages staff to debrief difficult moments, take mental health days, and find time for recovery. RMHCR wants to ensure that all staff, especially staff who are impacted the most, are as whole and supported as the families they welcome. We are very grateful that our House Program Coordinators have also found unique and personal ways

to practice self-care. Ashley, a trained yoga instructor, builds time to rebalance and center herself at the end of her shift before she goes home to my family. And Lyndee will take the first 30 minutes at home before family responsibilities to dive into a craft project that is underway. Lyndee and Ashley are two of the remarkable team members that you will meet here at RMHCR.

We are proud to support our families and humbled to participate in their journey. It is truly an honor to welcome families into our Houses, and a gift to have such an extraordinary team there to greet them with open hearts. Through their kindness, compassion, and unwavering commitment to providing the highest level of care, our staff ensures that even the most vulnerable families feel supported every step of the way. They are the first threads in a blanket of comfort and support, helping families to be the very best support system for their child in care.

{ BEAUTIFUL, POWERFUL, DESERVING }

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

THE EYE OF THE STORM

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

Warning: The following contains mentions of self-harm that may be triggering to some audiences.

Self-harm is a difficult topic from any angle. It is baffling and uncomfortable for those who have never experienced it, and potentially triggering to those who have. So, dear reader, do you trust me to take care of you as we delve into this sensitive subject? Yes? Good. Then let’s cross these stormy seas together, shall we?

I have a minor history of self-harm. The first time was when I was 15, shortly after I entered treatment for anorexia. After years of invisible mental agony, I was desperate to have a visual, tactile expression of my pain. I wanted to feel something, anything, even—maybe especially—pain. For me, the physical pain and mental panic that accompanied self-harming behaviors was like a shot of pure adrenaline. Following that tumultuous high, there was always a lull in my mental struggles. For a moment, my brain’s fight or flight response was put on pause. My racing thoughts were replaced by simple silence, and I relished the comfort of quiet. This rare state of calm, the eye of the storm, was something I came to crave just as much as the high from the actual self-harming behavior. The only problem was that the calm never lasted.

In reality, the rush I felt from selfharm was really my body crying out in confusion over my attack, and there was a price to be paid. After the initial trauma of the self-harming behavior wore off, so did my peaceful interlude, and I found myself back in my invisible, but now even more severe, mental storm. More severe, because the self-harming

BY VERONICA RYAN

behavior had left feelings of guilt, shame and self-hate in its wake. The price of that momentary peace was to feed my belief that I was inherently wrong or evil—a mistake. So, after each episode of self-harm the eye of the storm closed back in upon me, and I was once again left a prisoner in my own mind.

I couldn’t see it then but, thankfully, I realize now how maladaptive a coping mechanism my self-harming behavior was. It offered temporary relief and comfort but, in the end, it only exacerbated my mental distress. Now that I’ve had treatment, my go-to coping mechanisms have had a complete makeover. They’re positive and productive, and they leave me in a better place than where I started. Let me take you along for my favorite… It’s still dark outside when my alarm goes off. I grab my phone and swipe it off, checking the time as I do. Ugh.

After one final stretch of my whole body, I roll out of bed and shuffle to the bathroom. I get ready quickly, waking up as I do: brush teeth, put in contacts, wash face, put on clothes, tie back hair… muscle memory guides me through these sleepy mornings. Before I know it, I’m throwing on my sneakers, grabbing my keys, and slipping out the door into the early morning. Music is my shotgun rider, it keeps me company as I drive to the gym. Part of the early morning crew, I’m one of the first members to swipe my tag and be greeted by a cheerful beep. What comes next depends on the day. Some days it’s a HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training) workout, other days it’s a date with the treadmill, Pilates, or yoga. Some days it’s a happy combination. What is consistent on all days, though, is the result. For a brief

moment in time, I touch that same high, the high I chased through self-harm and other maladaptive coping mechanisms before I learned there was another way. The more intense the workout, the more intense the high. I feel my heart race,

I hear it pound. Sweat pours down my face, I taste salt. My inhales and exhales are forced to the extreme, like the mix of pleasure and pain when you burst from underwater and take a huge, glad breath. I find pleasure in pain as I break my body down. Only this time breaking down leads to building up. This time, self- inflicted “pain” is a form of self-love not self-hate. I push my body to the limit, I push right to the point before collapse, and when I hit that mark, I feel a high as powerful as those I got from self-harm, but with no price to be paid, no guilt, or shame, or doubt. I touch that high and smile, holding its hand for a brief moment before saying goodbye—a healthy goodbye—until tomorrow.

The sun waves “hello” to me on my ride home, and the rest of my morning is spent getting ready for the day ahead. I take a hot shower, letting the steam hug me. Wrapped up in a cozy robe I enjoy a quiet breakfast, my favorite part of the day. I give thanks to my body, my vessel, as I refuel and nourish it. I feel refreshed, I feel joy, I feel peace. I am not in the eye of the storm anymore. No, I have passed through the storm and I’m on the other side.

Join me next month for, “Pillow Talk: An ER Love Story.”

Not broken, beautiful. XOXO

SWASI-ANN BRADLEY { THE POWER OF HER VISION

Tell us a little about your journey what inspired you to launch GJI Elite Assist and step into your role as an Executive Support & Visibility Specialist?

I started GJI Elite Assist after more than 10 years leading programs, systems, and operations and seeing firsthand how many brilliant founders and executives were stuck in the weeds. They were doing powerful work but constantly overwhelmed by the backend of their business. I knew I could offer more than task support, I could offer leadershiplevel partnership. So I built GJI Elite Assist as a space where strategy meets execution, where high-performing entrepreneurs could get the structure, clarity, and visibility they need to grow, without burning out.

You emphasize helping founders grow “without the overwhelm.” What are the most common struggles your clients face when they first come to you?

Most of my clients are wearing all the hats. They’re brilliant at what they do coaching, creating, leading but they’re buried under the day-today. Inbox chaos, missed leads, halffinished systems, no time to show up online. They know they need help, but they don’t know where to start. That’s where I come in to organize the backend, reclaim their time, and bring clarity to the chaos.

With over a decade of experience, what have been some of the biggest lessons you’ve learned about entrepreneurship and leadership?

One of the biggest lessons? That doing more doesn’t mean you’re doing better. Real leadership is about letting go of perfection, control, and trying to be everything at once. I’ve also learned that clarity and consistency will take you further than hustle ever will. You don’t have to have it all figured out. You just need systems, support, and a willingness to start.

4. How do you determine what each client truly needs, especially when they’re in survival mode and wearing all the hats?

I listen between the lines. During onboarding, I ask a lot of questions, not just “What do you need help with?” but “What’s draining you the most?” “What’s falling through the cracks?” I observe patterns and help clients prioritize what will create the biggest relief and momentum. From there, we create a plan that’s sustainable, not overwhelming.

You offer a variety of support services—from inbox management to social media strategy. Which area do you find most business owners neglect that ends up costing them time or visibility?

Visibility, without a doubt. A lot of founders hide in the backend of their business. They’re so focused on tasks, emails, and behind-the-scenes work that their online presence becomes inconsistent or nonexistent. That costs them leads, partnerships, and brand trust. The truth is, being visible is part of your leadership. If people don’t see you, they can’t hire you.

What makes your approach to executive support different from a typical virtual assistant or administrative professional?

I combine strategy and execution. I’m not just checking off tasks, I’m helping you build systems that grow with you. I understand what it means to lead a mission, manage a team, and carry a vision. I step in with experience, structure, and a partner mindset. My clients aren’t just delegating, they’re building with someone who sees the bigger picture.

Can you share a transformation story, someone whose business or mindset changed significantly after partnering with you?

One client came to me with a thriving mission but total chaos behind the scenes. She was running programs, managing community partnerships, and trying to keep everything in her head. Within our first month, I built her a digital workspace, drafted policies, set up automations, and created a team onboarding system. She told me, “This is the first time I’ve felt like a real CEO.” That’s the kind of transformation I live for.

Visibility is a big part of your mission. Why do you believe being “seen” is just as important as being “organized” in business?

Because you can have the most incredible offer or mission in the world, but if no one knows about it, it doesn’t matter. Visibility isn’t just marketing; it’s leadership. It’s how people connect to your values, your voice, and your energy. When your

““To me, “Superbloom” symbolizes what happens when we finally trust ourselves, break free of comparison, and step into the life we’re meant to live.”

backend is organized, you can show up with consistency and confidence. The two go hand in hand.

How do you stay up to date on the latest tools, platforms, and systems to keep your clients at the top of their game?

I test tools regularly, follow trusted experts, and stay in community with other service pros and strategists. I’m naturally curious, so I love exploring new platforms and figuring out how to make them work better for real people. I also build templates and systems that can evolve so my clients don’t have to worry about every update or algorithm shift.

What advice would you give to women entrepreneurs who struggle with letting go of control and delegating effectively?

Start small and start with the thing that’s draining you the most. Delegation isn’t about giving up control. It’s about reclaiming capacity. When you find the right support, you’ll wish you had done it sooner. It’s not about doing less, it’s about doing more of what only you can do.

What does a “backend that feels as good as it looks on the outside” really mean, and why is that so important for sustainability and growth?

It means your systems match your brand. That your workflows feel aligned, not stressful. That your emails are going out, your leads are being tracked, your documents are easy to find and you’re not the one

doing it all. A beautiful brand with a messy backend can only go so far. But when everything behind the scenes flows well, you show up more confidently and sustainably.

You support a variety of service-based entrepreneurs, including coaches, consultants, and founders. How do you tailor your services across industries while keeping your core mission intact?

I focus on people first, then process. Every industry has different tools or language, but the core problems are often the same: lack of time, no system, and burnout. I listen to what matters most to each client, then build systems and strategies around their goals, always rooted in the mission to help them grow without overwhelm.

What are three signs that it’s time for a business owner to invest in high-level executive support?

1. You’re constantly behind on tasks that aren’t in your zone of genius.

2. You’re doing everything yourself but feel like you’re not moving forward.

3. You’ve got a vision, but no time, space, or support to bring it to life.

What’s something most people misunderstand about working with a support specialist like yourself? That it’s just about checking boxes. In reality, it’s about partnership. I’m not just here to complete tasks, I’m here to help you think strategically, build smart systems, and stay visible.

It’s a mix of strategy, admin, and accountability.

Lastly, what’s your vision for GJI Elite Assist in the next 5 years—and what legacy do you hope to leave through your work?

In 5 years, I see GJI Elite Assist as a powerhouse support agency, known for helping purpose-driven leaders run sustainable, visible businesses, without chaos. I want to be known not just for what I helped people check off, but for what I helped them step into. My legacy is grounded in helping people rise, through systems, support, and strategy.

{ INSIDE A WOMAN’S MIND } GRIEF

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

To say this past month has been a struggle would be an understatement. Two people who were very close to me passed. Within weeks of each other. The loss was real and I felt it. I found myself drifting down towards the rabbit hole, consumed with flooding emotions. Allowing myself to feel the pain. It has been so long since I have felt this way. When I was a 15 year old girl who had just lost her mother. This month I mourned. I sat in my grief. I cried in private while mustering a smile to the outside world. I worked remote from home A LOT instead of reporting to the office. I let the dishes pile up in the sink. I didn’t leave my home for two days until a friend coerced me out of hiding. We walked/ran for 3.5 miles in the pouring rain for a challenge in Downtown Rochester. Normally I would have balked at the idea but it was exactly what I needed. It felt liberating. As if I was being washed clean from all that was weighing me down. My stress was released and in that moment I felt free.

BY TRINA ALESSI

grieving before the actual loss. It can actually help you prepare both emotionally and mentally for when the time arrives.

- ABBREVIATED GRIEF is when you are able to move through the grieving process rather quickly. This typically occurs when you have already done the work to prepare yourself for the loss and usually comes after the anticipatory grief process.

physical symptoms such as an upset stomach, insomnia, anxiety or panic attacks. It is when you have not allowed yourself to “feel” therefore your body goes through the process in physical form.

- CUMULATIVE GRIEF is when you are dealing with more than one loss all at once. Multiple losses with in a short period of time can be emotionally overwhelming.

I decided to write this article because everyone has their own ways of grieving. Grief is our way to cope with loss of a connection that defines us. I was extremely intrigued to learn that there are in fact multiple ways to experience grief. Let’s take a minute to explore this.

- ANTICIPATORY GRIEF is

- DELAYED GRIEF is when you feel the loss days, weeks or months later. It’s like a shock wave that comes over you out of nowhere and hits you all at once. When there is time to finally settle in with the emotions and it becomes very real.

- INHIBITED GRIEF is when the emotions are repressed, causing

- COLLECTIVE GRIEF is the shared experience of sadness and mourning felt by a group of people. Some examples of this is during a war or after a natural disaster.

The stages of grief begin with denial. Followed by anger, bargaining, depression and then acceptance. Coping takes time and patience. Be gentle with yourself. The best steps you can take during this difficult period is to practice self care. Ensure you get adequate sleep, exercise, eat nutritious meals, meditate. Try to stick with a routine as grief can disrupt your sense of normalcy. Do not distract from your emotions, tend to them instead. Allow yourself to relish in the memories because ultimately that is how we keep those closest to us alive. It allows you to feel connected to them even after they are gone. Reach out to friends, family or seek therapy to form a supportive foundation. Remember

{ INSIDE A WOMAN’S MIND }

“The stages of grief begin with denial. Followed by anger, bargaining, depression and then acceptance. Coping takes time and patience. Be gentle with yourself.”

there is no time limit on when grief ends. To mourn is to acknowledge the loss, to experience the pain from that loss, and to adjust to living life without that person.

Last weekend I went on a rampage, cleaned my home from top to bottom. Blasted music while I reorganized everything. This was my way of pulling myself out of a depressed state. With every item I went through, felt like I was repairing every broken piece that

was inside me. My mood shifted and I could feel the surge of energy rush through my veins. Then earlier today I went on a walk with my cousin who gifted me with a poem I had written to my uncle as a teenager. He told me that my uncle had kept this little poem I had wrote all these years, by his bedside on his nightstand. I honestly had no idea he still had it or even cherished it that much up until that very moment. The papers were slightly yellow from age but neatly

folded. The blue ink weathered but clearly visible. As I held the words I had written many moons ago as a child in my hands I was filled with love and gratitude. Each and every one of us has the power to create a positive impact. How beautiful is that? Spread the light.

DENIED THE RIGHT TO READ { LETS GET L.I.T. }

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

CLAINDA

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

FLORENCE, DR. CAROL ST. GEORGE PROFESSOR AT THE UNIVERSITY OF ROCHESTER, & ALEXA BELLAVIA SENIOR AT OUR LADY OF MERCY

The Hidden History of Silenced Voices

When we think of reading, we often picture something peaceful: a child with a bedtime story, a book club sipping wine, or a quiet moment with a favorite novel. But for much of history, reading was considered a dangerous act, and especially so if you were enslaved, poor, or a woman.

The right to read has not always been a given. In fact, it has been deliberately denied to entire groups of people for centuries. Why? Because reading is power, liberation, joy, and life. The ability to read means the ability to think critically, to question injustice, to dream beyond the boundaries someone else has set for you. The ability to communicate effectively and efficiently with others.

As Walter Dean Myers stated, “Reading is not an option”

Reading has been historically a tool of control. In the American South during slavery, it was illegal to teach enslaved people to read. Slave owners knew that literacy opened doors to rebellion, freedom, and independence. As Frederick Douglass, who taught himself to read in secret, famously wrote, “Once you learn to read, you will be forever free.”

Women, too, have been left out of the classroom for much of history. For centuries, it was believed that women didn’t need an education. Many were told their place was in the home, not in books. The fear wasn’t that women couldn’t learn, it was that they would, and then begin asking difficult questions about society, marriage, religion, and power. Women were forced to hide books in their pockets, hence the word pocketbook. Even today, some books targeted at women are disrespected by labeling them as ‘chic-lit’, a derogatory term meaning less than what men read.

Literacy Goes Beyond the Book & Bind

Poverty restricted individuals from learning to read. In both the U.S. and around the world, people born into poverty often couldn’t access schooling, had to work from a young age, or lived in areas where education simply wasn’t available. Even today, literacy is closely tied to economic status, the section of the city you reside, the school you attend within the district, resources disseminated equitably and those who need reading skills the most are often the least supported. Your zip code should not determine the quality of your literacy instruction.

Being denied the right to read has lasting effects on individuals, families, and entire communities. For those who were once enslaved, illiteracy meant being locked out of opportunity even after emancipation. Contracts could be manipulated, voting rights were nearly impossible to access, and false information was hard to challenge without the ability to read. For women, being excluded from literacy meant fewer career options, less independence, and limited control over finances, health care, or legal matters. Even today, two-thirds of the world’s illiterate adults are women. And for the poor, low literacy often means lower wages, limited job opportunities, and difficulty accessing resources. In the U.S., nearly 43 million adults read below a sixth-grade level. That’s more than one in ten people.

Even though we don’t have laws today that say certain people can’t read, it doesn’t mean everyone has an equal opportunity for literacy learning. Underfunded schools, overcrowded classrooms, and lack of access to books or the internet make it harder for many children to develop strong reading skills, especially for those in low-income or rural communities. Even in a digital world full of information, there’s a growing need for something called information literacy which is the ability to tell fact from fiction, recognize misinformation, and think critically

about what we read online. Without that, people can be easily manipulated, misled, or left out of important conversations.

Literacy, the ability to read and write, and may we add having a signature is life changing. It helps adults have confidence when applying for jobs, understanding medical forms, and reading to their children. It is necessary for navigating street signs, shopping for groceries, reading menus and more essential activities. Reading is also a source of knowledge, entertainment, and fun. Books and stories can give readers a sense of self-awareness as they see themselves in the pages and help them develop empathy and understanding of people and cultures that differ from their own. The BIG debate around cursive and the need to incorporate it back into the State Standards is both critical and crucial to the literary landscape. How will one be able to read historical documents, sign a passport, and sign a contract, to name a few without learning cursive? Literacy is infused into every part of our lives and the ability to read and write is life changing.

Voice, Choice, & Freedom

Reading is about so much more than books. It’s about voice, choice, and freedom. When someone can’t read, they can’t fully participate in society. They can’t access their rights, protect themselves legally, or understand the systems around them. That’s why being denied a right to read isn’t just about education, it’s about justice. Many believe it is the greatest social justice issue of our times. Literacy has always been tied to power. Ensuring that everyone regardless of race, gender, or income has access to the power of reading, leads to building a more fair, better informed, and empowered society.

Educational Trust New York Report: The State of Early Literacy in New York The Educational Trust of New York April 2023 report entitled A Call to Action: The

{

LETS GET L.I.T. }

“Let’s Get L.I.T. to end the crisis that plagues our city, county, state, and country. To quote one of my teachers: “The struggles of one are the struggles of all”.”

State of Early Literacy in New York shed much needed light on the literacy crisis not only in Rochester, Monroe County, the State of New York but the country as a whole face and we must act NOW! We learn from an educational standpoint, reading proficiently by the end of third grade is the most important indicator of future student success, with students not reading proficiently by the end of third grade become four times more likely to drop out of school. This rate doubles for Black and Latinx students living in poverty. According to this report, New York State ranks 37th in fourth grade reading scores, trailing Florida in fourth, New Jersey in sixth, and Mississippi in 22nd. Of all third graders, 46% scored proficient in English Language Arts on the 2021-2022 New York State Assessment. Of the third graders from lowincome backgrounds, 35% were proficient in ELA on the 2021-2022 New York State Assessment. As we bring things closer to home, the three cities in New York with the highest concentration of child poverty Rochester, Syracuse, and Buffalo, also have some of the lowest third grade proficiency rates on the state ELA assessments. What is both troubling, scary, and eye opening is that the scope of proficiency for third grade students is 11%-24% (Rochester 11%, Syracuse 13 %, and Buffalo 24%), and there is no outrage, no organizing, no demanding better for our children.

We quote Whitney Huston “I believe the children are our future”, we will quote the great African Proverb “It takes a village to raise a child”, and yet we are okay with generations not reading, writing, speaking, communicating and comprehending proficiently. Have we normalized illiteracy? Are we okay with the state of our communities, city, county, state, and country? Have we adopted the mindset “as long as me and mine are good, I’m good”?

Conclusion

Education Trust of Literacy in Monroe County: The State of Early Literacy in Monroe County

There is no other way to say this: Monroe County is facing a literacy crisis. In Monroe County, students in grades 3 through 8 overall are reading at a 38% proficiency level. Upon closer examination, students in the city of Rochester are reading at a 13% proficiency level, while students in towns like Pittsford and Penfield are reading at 72% or 67% proficiency levels. That is a concerning difference.

This is a difference, I have been able to experience and witness firsthand. As a rising senior at Our Lady of Mercy High School, I have been fortunate enough to receive a high-level reading and English education, coupled with the fact that I have grown up around literature. This summer, I have had the opportunity to work with Let’s Get L.I.T., an organization that works to close this literacy gap and provide students, as well as their families, with the tools and skills needed to achieve literacy competence. Working in their Summer Family program, I assisted in the boys’ classroom and was able to aid them in learning more advanced reading and writing skills. The work I did with these students allowed me to witness the literacy disparity that exists within Monroe County. At the start of the program, there were spelling errors, constant struggle for complete sentences, and reading was inconsistent for the age group I was working with. After a few weeks in Let’s Get L.I.T.’s program, I noticed impressive improvements among the boys. They were able to write multiple paragraphs and explain their answers in detail. Proud could not begin to cover the way I felt witnessing their growth. Let’s Get L.I.T. is undeniably important and is a huge part of the solution for the literacy crisis. It

is truly a crisis when young students whose literacy skills should be cultivated early are denied the fundamental and human right of reading and writing (learning cursive). Literacy shows up in almost every aspect of our everyday lives. It is simply unjust to deny generations of students a skill that will help them succeed in the day-to-day world. Denying this human right to a large population unfairly handicaps them in the world of literacy. It prevents them from learning more about history, making purchases, signing contracts, the lives of others, and being able to completely express themselves. This will negatively impact their quality of life now and in the future. It is the job of the community to be a part of solutions like Let’s Get L.I.T. to end the crisis that plagues our city, county, state, and country. To quote one of my teachers: “The struggles of one are the struggles of all”. If part of our community is impacted by the literacy crisis, it is the struggle of all Monroe County residents; therefore, it is our responsibility to reduce said struggle and restore literacy competence to the whole of the county.

RECLAIMING YOUR SELFWORTH IN EVERY SEASON

This ongoing series will explore the journey of blooming into your fullest, truest self- through reinvention, spiritual alignment, radical self-worth, and fearless authenticity. Whether readers are navigating a new job, relationship, identity, or era, they’ll come here for monthly reminders that they’re not at all broken - they’re becoming more authentic.

“You’re Not Lost Babe, You’re Reinventing”

Let me guess. You’re in a moment of change.

Maybe you just left a job that no longer aligned. Maybe you’re healing from a relationship that cracked your heart wide open. Maybe you’re simply waking up to the truth that your life, on paper, looks “fine”... but your soul is whispering, WE WANT MORE THAN FINE!

If that’s you, welcome. You are not lost. You are not broken. You are whole and resourceful all on your own. You’re in the sacred space of reinvention - and I promise, it’s where your power lives. For years, I chased the illusion of “having it all together.” I climbed corporate ladders, played the part, smiled on Zoom calls while secretly wondering, Is this all there is? I thought success was about titles and paychecks and being liked by people who didn’t even know the real me. Spoiler alert: I burned out, broke down, and had to strip it all away to hear the whisper of my real self say - “You are meant for more. That’s why you’re craving it. Stop playing small and go bloom.”

BY ALANA CUMMINGS

And that’s where my company, Superbloom, was born. Not in perfection, but in the mess. In the unraveling and in the unlearning. In the brave decision to stop abandoning myself and start becoming the woman I actually wanted to be.

Here’s what I know now:

- When you know your worth, everything changes.

- When you trust your truth, you move differently.

- And when you stop gripping the plan and start trusting the Universe, life gets wildly more juicy and magical.

- Let me say this louder for the women in the back: Give yourself permission!

- You are allowed to change your mind.

- You are allowed to start over.

- You are allowed to evolve beyond the version of yourself other people got comfortable with.

Reinvention is not failure. It’s not quitting. It’s not weakness. Reinvention is remembering who you are underneath the programming and old conditioning. It’s coming home to your voice, your vision, your values.

And no matter what it looks like on the outside, that process starts within. Because here’s the thing: the world will constantly offer you distractions and detours. But inner peace? That’s the what we are here for. We are here for wholeness, connection, love, servicing others. When you’re grounded in who you are and what you deserve, you don’t need to chase, prove, or perform. You just become. You allow. After all we are human BEINGS, not human DOINGS.

Let me drop a few quotes that cracked me wide open:

“You are where your attention is.” “When you manage your self talk you manage your attention. When you manage your attention, you change your reality.”

That’s the whole game right there.

Want to change your life? Start by changing where your energy goes. Stop giving your focus to fear. Start feeding the vision instead of the doubt.

Let’s talk about worthiness for a second — because this is the wound so many women carry, often in silence. We’ve been taught that wanting more makes us selfish. That speaking up makes us “too much.” That having big dreams means we’re naïve. But guess what? That’s a lie. And we’re done playing small to make others comfortable.

Most people aren’t blocked because they’re unqualified. They’re blocked because deep down, they don’t believe they’re worthy of receiving what they desire. The job. The love. The abundance. The peace. The freedom.

But here’s the truth:

- You wouldn’t have the desire if you weren’t meant to fulfill it.

- You’re not behind. You’re just being rerouted to something better.

- And you don’t have to force it. You just have to allow it. Your job is to allow and get out of the way.

When I started living that way, like the Universe actually had my back,

“When you manage your self talk you manage your attention. When you manage your attention, you change your reality.”

everything softened. I could soften. I could breathe. I could be more engaged in every present moment. You attract it not by efforting your way there, but by aligning with the version of you who already has it.

You know how I picture it? Like placing an order at the cosmic café. The second you ask, it’s already in the works. You’re the billionth customer. Shipping is free. Now your only job is to show up, open-hearted, and TRUST that you will receive it.

So if you’re in a season of transition or reinvention, know this:

You’re not late. You’re right on time.

And the version of you on the other side of this? She’s already cheering you on like, YES QUEEN, keep going. You’ve already done it. Now let’s catch up to who you’re becoming.

Your next chapter doesn’t need permission. It needs your belief. Your bloom.

So say it with me: I trust the timing. I trust myself. I trust that the Universe/Higher Power/ God wants me to win.

This is your season. Let it be big. Let it be messy. Let it be yours.

You’re just blooming into the woman you were always meant to be.

Alana Cummings is a former corporate leader turned speaker, transformational coach, and the founder of Superbloom Coaching LLC, a movement rooted in selfworth, purpose, and authenticity. She helps her clients with mindset techniques so they remember who they are, reclaim what they deserve, and rise more confidently. Follow her on Instagram @superbloom.coaching or

2 RESTAURANTS & BARS

5 MEETING AND EVENT SPACES

12,500 SQUARE FEET OF EVENT SPACE

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

SISTERHOOD { SISTERHOOD }

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

BY SALLY DAVIDSON

Let’s talk about sisterhood. Not the kind you see on the highlight reels…

The real kind

The messy kind

The wounded kind

Because here’s my truth.... I’ve been hurt by women

I’ve been in rooms where I wanted to be seen… and instead I was silenced

Overlooked

Outcasted

Where comparison was the currency and competition was masked as “empowerment”

I’ve been in “sisterhoods” that preached love and light.... but behind the scenes it was mean girl energy

Spiritual bypassing

Backhanded compliments

Clique culture

Fake support

And yeah.... it f*cked with me

I questioned myself constantly

“Am I too much?”

“Not enough?”

“Why do I feel like I don’t belong?”

“Why does this still hurt?”

And here’s the part that gutted me....

I was paying to be in these rooms

High-ticket containers that sold healing… but felt like high school all over again

Let’s be real.....

The sister wound is real And it runs deep

But I didn’t walk away I did the work I raged I cried I reclaimed And I redefined what sisterhood means on my own terms

That’s why I created the Embodied Light Mastermind & Retreat. Because women like us?

We don’t need more hierarchy We don’t need to perform. We don’t need to be fixed

We need spaces where we are safe to be all of us

The fierce

The tender

The messy The magic

you’re held with it.

I built this space from the scars From the parts of me that were left out

From the woman who almost quit

And now, I invite you in....

Not because you need to be more But because you’re already whole

You just need a space that sees you

There are 2 spots left

This isn’t just a mastermind

It’s a reclamation

It’s business, embodiment, sisterhood, and sacred rebellion

All bringing our Visions to life

DM me “I’m ready” if this feels like it was written for you

In The Beautiful

Cornhill Neighborhood

This is a space where sisterhood is sacred again

Where you get to rise without shape-shifting

Where your nervous system is honored… not-pushed Where your vision is held,and

PHOTOS BY ROBYN BATY PHOTOGRAPHY

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

TIPS ON MOVING YOU WON’T SEE IN OTHER ARTICLES

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

BY NATASHA POLITO

I’ve moved eight times in 13 years. Here are my tips for not turning into a psychopath during the process.

Listen, you’re going to stress the f out and it’s going to be a nightmare. Put that in your head and accept it. Your stuff is going to get broken. People are going to be moving your underwear. You’re not going to be able to find your pillows and it’s going to rain. So knowing all of that, it’s part of the moving experience and I’m here to help you figure out a way to make it more manageable.

Obviously moving less stuff is the first step. There are various ways to donate your belongings. Here are some convenient ways to do that. First, have the people come to you and pay you for your crap. Facebook marketplace is a free way to sell things. The only downside is when people are late, and it can mess up your pans. The best way to manage this is to list everything for sale on the same day (Saturday morning) and spend the rest of the day having people show up at your place to give you money. Do this a month out from the move so that any lingering items have time to find a new home.

Next, you’ll donate. Sticking with the theme of making this the easiest possible experience for you, have people come to you to pick the junk up. There are “Buy Nothing” or “Community Gifting With Gratitude” Facebook groups. There are handy drive-throughs at your local Goodwill.

You don’t even need to get out of your car!

Garbage. What do you do with it? Boxes and boxes and Styrofoam and more junk. I have my personal favorites, but there are many junk removal places that will come and take it. Stop bothering to break down boxes yourself or separating out what’s recyclable and what’s garbage. Give yourself some grace and pay people to make your life easier!

Packing. Buy all of the packing supplies and don’t scrimp. Bankers boxes are awesome because you don’t need tape and it’s easy to peek inside a box to see the contents. (How did it take me eight moves to figure out that trick?) I used 75 banker boxes (they are smallish) and 24 “medium” boxes. Also, a nifty trick I recently figured out were to buy duffle bags made out of tarp material. These are great for moving plants, shoes, blankets and longer/odd-shaped items. I got twelve of them for reference. You’re going to want to get eight CLEAR plastic totes. If you order online, you’ll get the bonus of a cardboard box! Buy a TON of black markers and moving box tape and put them on every floor. You’ll keep losing them. Also, instead of marking the boxes, use stickers that are color coded with the name of the room they go to. That way you can reuse the banker boxes for your next move (yes, I have a ninth move already planned in my future!)

Moving day necessities you wouldn’t

think of: Chapstick, hand soap, plastic gloves, box cutters and LOTION! You’re going to wash your hands many times on moving day and boxes will dry them out. Take my advice and thank me later.

Move on a Friday. Make it a three-day weekend. In three days, you should be mostly unpacked if you work at a slow to medium pace. Give yourself that extra day for mental relaxation, a nap, and chill time.

OK it’s moving day. I really hope you don’t enlist your friends and family to help. They’ll get in the way. They aren’t professionals. They have bad backs and even though they love you and want to help... They are secretly pissed that they have to help you when they would just pay someone to move themselves. Do the people you love a favor and hire someone. Here’s the next trick... If you have a full house of crap, call the moving company and hire TWO trucks and SIX movers. Including a break, from start to finish, this will take six hours from the time they show up to your house. Four movers and one truck will have you moving things until eight at night and you’ll be exhausted. Don’t do that to yourself. It’ll be around $2500 plus tip.

Pets. Place calming diffusers throughout your new place the day before. This will help cats adjust. Make sure you have towels and baby shampoo on hand in case they don’t take the trip well. I had to clean a cat covered in feces from getting upset

{ SEASONS OF CHANGE

}

{ SHIFT+CONTROL } { WOMEN WHO INSPIRE }

“Listen, you’re going to stress the f out and it’s going to be a nightmare. Put that in your head and accept it. Your stuff is going to get broken.”

in the car ride, and I had no towels or soap to accomplish this. Learn from me ;)

Speaking of soap... Furnish your new house with hand soap, paper towels, toilet paper (and again, water bottles!) the night before the move.

Things to have on hand the day of the move: One or two towels if it’s raining so movers can wipe off furniture as they put it in the moving truck. Pants with pockets- sounds

funny, but you’re not going to want to carry your phone around and you don’t want to lose it. Have some snacks in your car.

OK the movers showed up. I’m not judging you for popping a gummy. Explain to them that you understand that things are going to get broken, show a little care by offering them drinks throughout the move (I forgot to buy cases of water!) and offer to buy them lunch. They’re probably sick of pizza and it’s ok to splurge

a little to have it delivered. Again, this article is about making this the easiest move possible, not about saving dollars. A little grace on your end will lead to happy movers. As my mom says, “You get more bees with honey.” Start of caring about the people who are helping you instead of being a stressed out a-hole.

I hope these tips don’t overwhelm you and you learn from my experience. Be well my friends!

A ROCKSTAR SINGLE MOM

BY CHRISTINE PIACENTINO

A CONVERSATION WITH LIFE COACH CHRISTINE CONTE

During significant transitions, such as career shifts, parenting milestones, or personal awakenings, individuals often seek guidance from those who have successfully navigated similar challenges. Christine Conte, founder of Christine Conte Coaching and creator of the Rockstar Single Mom™ platform, is a key figure in this space. Her journey through reinvention, single motherhood, and strong faith has shaped a coaching practice built on integrity and compassion.

In this interview, Christine discusses her inspirations, the spiritual foundation of her work, and her commitment to empowering women, particularly single mothers, during life’s most challenging times.

From a successful corporate career to becoming an empty nester and experiencing menopause, Christine’s journey has been transformed. Her approach focuses on helping women rebuild, rise, and soar, making her a unique voice in personal development.

We spoke with Christine about personal transformation, resilience, and how she inspires Rockstar Single Moms to live boldly and lead with heart.

What inspired you to become a life coach, and how did your journey influence your decision to launch Christine Conte Coaching? 2017 was a significant transition year for me. My prior career came to an end, my two grown children were gone, and

I was empty-nested, and I went through menopause. Hurdles make me stronger. I saw these events as signs of freedom, change, and opportunity.

Professional life and leadership coaching enable me to leverage my prior experiences, wisdom, skills, and expertise to support others on a profound level. For example, my knowledge of building a successful corporate career while raising two children as a single mother gave me the vision for the Rockstar Single Mom™ platform I’m building. I’ve leveraged my knowledge base to create a coaching career, empowering women through challenging life transitions, particularly divorce and single parenting.

You offer Christian-based faith coaching upon request. How does spirituality shape your approach to personal transformation and healing?

My faith has guided me throughout my entire life since early childhood. It influences everything about me: who I am, how I think, my morality, my values, and my core beliefs. It also guides my boundaries and limits. Naturally, this connection shapes my approach to personal transformation and the healing of others. I’m a vessel through which the healing is done. It reveals the depth of understanding of their pain, the exact words they need to hear, the steady calmness of the experience, the virtual embrace they experience, and the sense of lightness and peace they feel by the end of the session.

major life transitions like divorce or single parenting?

My coaching practice is built on integrity, faith, truth, compassion, and service. I operate with the highest integrity both personally and professionally. I have already mentioned how my faith plays a significant part in my coaching. Truth is paramount – both for myself and my clients. I deliver truth with compassion and hold space for healing. And I operate in deeply respectful service to my clients.

Many single mothers face time constraints and emotional burnout. How do you tailor your coaching to meet them where they are?

PHOTOS BY ROBYN BATY PHOTOGRAPHY

Moms, in general, carry the majority of the mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual load for their kids – marital status doesn’t matter. This leads to burnout. Aside from not having a dad at home, there is one significant difference that exacerbates burnout for single moms compared to other moms. Single moms do it all while punching a clock. They deal with the active lives of kids while adhering to a strict visitation schedule. To combat burnout, I help clients learn the tools and techniques that work best for them. It’s highly personalized. A plan might include specific meditation, breathwork, visualization exercises, breaks, walks, connecting with nature, mantras, affirmations, and aligning with values and purpose. These are simple yet powerful ways to recalibrate when overwhelm and burnout set in.

What core values guide your work with clients, especially those navigating

What does a typical first session look like for a new client who may be feeling overwhelmed or unsure about starting coaching?

“Moms, in general, carry the majority of the mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual load for their kids – marital status doesn’t matter.”

Potential clients start with a free, confidential consultation. It’s a 30-minute phone call scheduled here: www.calendly. com/ChristineConteCoach. I learn what the person is experiencing, I answer any questions, and we decide if it’s a good fit. It is a mutual decision. There’s no pressure and no strings attached.

You emphasize intuitive listening in your practice. How do you create a space where clients feel safe, seen, and heard?

Because I meet with my clients virtually, clients are in their comfort zone. They go to a convenient place for them, such as their own office or couch. We don’t meet at a coffee shop or other location. We get into deep, personal stuff. It gets emotional. You don’t want to be sitting at Panera crying your eyes out with little kids staring at you while eating their soup.

By getting to know my clients, I learn what works for them. The process is highly individualized. We go deep. I understand their needs and provide them. This creates real change.

My approach is to listen deeply – not just hear the words (although words matter and carry energy), but to pay attention to what’s going on behind the words. This is where “intuition” kicks in. I receive images, words, and sensations that guide me to tap into what’s going on with the client. Clients receive deeper meaning from their sessions as a result.

What tools or strategies do you use to help single mothers rediscover joy, balance, and self-worth during difficult transitions?

Each individual is unique; thus, a customized coaching plan approach is necessary. However, I’ll say this: a single mother’s joy typically stems from knowing she can raise her child well on her own, where “well” means with morality, values, confidence, strength, resilience, and purpose – or some human blueprint close to this. To do this, Mom needs to possess these things herself first. I help moms recapture, repair, and rebuild the parts of themselves they feel they’ve lost along the way.

In helping Mom feel whole and regain her identity, she becomes strong, confident, resilient, and purposeful as a mother, a woman, and a person. This brings back the sense of joy, balance, and self-worth. Life is still busy. Socks still get lost in the dryer. And milk still spills. But the suffering stops. Suffering is replaced with peace.

Can you share a transformation story that stands out, perhaps a client who was a single mom and experienced a breakthrough?

One story is about a single mom who was struggling with her relationship with her young adult daughter. They were estranged for all intents and purposes. Mom had worked with me in the past with great results on other matters, so she contacted me to help her with this particular situation. Within four months, she and her daughter were speaking, and by the end of our sessions (about eight months), they were taking a vacation together.

What advice would you give to women who are rebuilding their lives emotionally, professionally, or

financially after a significant life change?

I’ll offer three pieces of advice:

1. Don’t let the change define you. Instead, redefine the shift. You get to decide how your life will be and who you will be every step of the way.

2. Your strengths have an opportunity to shine when changing, depending on how you approach it. This is linked to mindset. If you see change as positive, your experience will be positive.

3. Set a goal, make a plan for that goal, and define the steps in the plan. If things don’t go the way you’d like, adjust the plan accordingly—but don’t change the goal.

You also coach clients in leadership and business development. How do you help single mothers build confidence in professional spaces?

I’m a Certified Confidence Coach with a proven method for building confidence. Many people struggle with confidence, regardless of their social, marital, financial, or professional standing.

Professional spaces are similar to the home environment. At home, the “team” is the family. In a single mom’s house, she is undoubtedly the leader – a role she might not be comfortable with at first. Both professional teams and family teams require strong leaders. I help single moms become strong leaders of their family unit. This involves confidence building, boundary setting, and consequence delivery, as well as many other areas that are carefully crafted into my coaching program. The confidence one builds in one area pours over into

“From a successful corporate career to becoming an empty nester and experiencing menopause, Christine’s journey has been transformed.”

o other areas of life. Strong leadership at home helps foster strong leadership in the workplace, and vice versa.

What are some common mindset blocks you see in your clients, and how do you help them shift those perspectives?

Standard blocks are: limiting beliefs ( “I’m not good enough”, “I can’t”, “they won’t”); blame-gaming; and belief systems (religion, patriarchy, assumptions, etc.).

I help them shift through personalized, deep, professionally trained coaching. It’s a different path for each person. There’s no silver bullet answer.

What’s something you wish more people understood about the emotional labor and resilience of single motherhood?

Women become single mothers through various circumstances. The most common contributing factors are: abuse, adultery, abandonment, or the death of a partner. Single moms need support, not judgment.

There seems to be less compassion for single mothers, as if a veil of undeservingness looms over them. Such attitudes contribute to her emotional burden, which in turn affects her children. Society needs mentally and emotionally strong children. Supporting single moms means better futures for our children. For most families, moms carry the mental and emotional load. We cannot change the inexplicable need children have for their mother. This is the emotional labor that any mother undertakes. A single mom who does

it all on her own and turns out great kids embodies resilience.

Regardless of their attitudes, lack of support, shouldering the responsibilities of caring for their kids, working, and trying to find moments for themselves, these incredibly resilient single mothers survive, many thrive, and some soar. I identify with the soarers. They should run the world.

How do you stay grounded and inspired in your own life and work as a coach?

To stay grounded, I connect with nature by taking walks, gardening, hiking, and appreciating scenery. Every year, I go to the mountains and visit the ocean.

Art, music, books, documentaries, and movies all inspire me. However, it is my clients who mostly inspire me. Their transformations are captivating and make me think how different the world could be if everyone healed.

Writing is my primary creative outlet. I write about personal development for women who want to be stronger, more confident, and better for themselves and their children. I’m working on several books, and I’ve originated a column for the next issue of Rochester Woman Online Magazine called Rockstar Single Mom. This column aims to inspire, mentor, and support single mothers who are raising exceptional children on their terms. These are the fearless moms who courageously rise above, go beyond, and shine as bright beacons of love and hope for their children.

What’s next for your coaching practice—are there any new offerings, workshops, or projects on the horizon?

The next goal for my coaching practice is to develop a multi-level program tailored to single mothers. My column and Facebook Page, Rockstar SingleMom facebook.com/ groups/rockstarsinglemom, is a step toward building a community for single moms to promote collaboration, connection, and support for one another. The program will include monthly group coaching calls, oneon-one private coaching sessions, and a comprehensive workbook.

To stay up-to-date with current offerings, workshops, and events, I recommend visiting my website: www.ChristineConteCoaching.com, where you can sign up for our mailing list to receive notifications about upcoming events.

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

WHAT IS A ROCKSTAR SINGLE MOM?

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

BY CHRISTINE CONTE

My parents’ house was on the only access road to a local low-income housing development with many single-parent families. As a kid, I watched streams of unhappy single mothers trudge up and down our road with crying children trailing behind. I felt sorry for those kids. Their moms seemed to yell at them an awful lot and never slowed down so their little ones could keep up. It felt very wrong to me. What I concluded from watching those families at such an impressionable age was that single mothers were mean, impatient, and angry, and children of single mothers were unwanted, sad, and struggled to keep up.

Growing up, I did everything right. I earned straight A’s, listened to my parents, and was respectful, polite, loving, and kind to others. I never got into trouble, never missed a curfew, and followed the rules. I grew into an intelligent, well-adjusted, health-conscious, collegeeducated, vibrant young woman living a good life with a solid career underway. The phrase “single mother” and all it meant was the furthest from who I was. From what I’d interpreted as a child, that was a terrible life and wasn’t going to be my life.

And then I met him. He was the guy with potential who said all the right things. He caught me at a uniquely vulnerable moment in my life. He pledged to protect me and care for me. Like we women all do, I saw what I wanted to see, believed his words, and ignored his actions and all the red flags. I was the loving, loyal, forgiving, empathetic, glowing light in his life who saw his sadness and anger

as something I could heal through my devotion and love for him. Instead, I became an enabler without realizing it. I was a devoted wife who doted on my husband while putting up with increasingly more bullshit. When I was two months pregnant with our second child, he told me he was leaving me for someone else. He was very matter-offact and spoke as if I deserved it.

The weight of betrayal hung in my stomach. I finally understood those single mothers I observed years ago walking past my parents’ house. They’d been betrayed and were angry, mean, and had given up as a result. They’d been deceived into believing they would be safe with a man whose child she bore. They’d been tricked by the man who told them “I love you” or “I’ll marry you.” They’d been misled by the lie they’d been told that a husband was the biggest prize a woman could win in her life. They were furious with the broken promise to women that if they followed men’s rules for women, everything would be fine. They were broken by the lie that a man will take care of you forever.

I was tricked by the fairytale I’d bought into my whole life, and was conned by the system that kept that fairytale alive. The betrayal was exposed as the truth arose: that all the things we were told as little girls and young women about marriage were a gamble, not a guarantee, and the odds are actually against us.

Unlike mothers whose men don’t leave them, single mothers are a segment of the population that have to figure

everything out alone. The pieces crash down on single mothers all at once like an avalanche. In that moment of brokenness, you have two choices: live like you’ve just died, or live like you’ve just been born into truth. Die inside or live anew. These are your only choices. It’s in this decisive moment that the ability to become a Rockstar Single Mom is made possible. It’s in this moment of possibility that your true spirit as a mother can take its first breath. His leaving is the gateway to being the mother you didn’t know you could be, and would never be able to become if he stayed. We single moms are the Olympic athletes of mothersthe extreme version of “mom” we could never have become otherwise. That is the hidden blessing in the destruction. I never cared what people thought about me or my situation of being dumped pregnant with a two-year-old. My children were all I cared about. My single focus was their well-being, their character, and their future. My focus was to be the best mother I possibly could be and to raise the best women I could raise. This was the beginning of my life as a Rockstar Single Mom.

There’s something about the term “Rockstar” that sets those who easily wear that label apart from others. Rockstars don’t absorb criticism. Rockstars understand that criticism is part of the game. Rockstars rise above because they know their mission and purpose. Their calling is to be great. They know their greatness comes from within, not outside of themselves, and not from anyone else. There is nothing anyone else can say or do to change it.

{ ROCKSTAR SINGLE MOM LIFE }

“‘Single’ can arise from being single, divorced, separated, or widowed. It doesn’t matter how you got here. You’re here.”

Their greatness isn’t affected by what others think of them. Rockstars don’t steal from others. Nor do they look to others for approval. Rockstars create from nothing. They have an inner knowing. They use their sixth sense to guide them. It takes unimaginable courage to put yourself out there and go for what you know you are meant to do and who you are meant to be unapologetically. Rockstars understand that. Their amps are turned all the way up. They live fearlessly.

That’s how I felt as a mother. It didn’t matter that I was single or married. I knew who I was, what was in me, and what I had to give. My mission was to raise my daughters to be amazing, wonderfully happy, highly moral, good people. It didn’t matter to me what anyone else thought or how anyone else raised their children. I knew my current purpose and took it seriously. I required no one’s approval. I didn’t absorb anyone’s criticisms or negativity. I had the power to frame these young children’s lives as I saw fit. I was courageous. I was fearless.

I set out to do this single mother thing full throttle. It didn’t matter that I was in it alone. And it didn’t matter that my ex threw obstacles in my path all along the way. The more he did these things, the more determined I became to uphold my ethos – to not allow his ridiculous actions to impact my children any further than they already had the day he left. And with that mindset, I became a formidable Rockstar Single Mom.

The funny thing is that in the end,

my ex was right. I got exactly what I deserved. I have two wonderful children. I got us out of town and away from his endless nonsense. I stepped into a higher earning career. I got my girls into a better-quality school district, with more options and activities for them to thrive. I participated in every moment of my daughters’ lives. I watched them grow into strong, confident women who made their mark in the world. I found true love and remarried. I started my own business. I’ve helped countless clients navigate life difficulties, turning my personal setbacks into helping others. I grew a knowledge base of wisdom I wouldn’t trade for the world. I got published. I got my happily ever after. How do you get the happily ever after you deserve? It starts by fully owning your circumstances. That means taking full responsibility for your current situation. This does not mean you have to own what someone else did to put you here. That’s theirs to carry. Stop blaming them. They’ll get theirs in the end; that’s not for you to worry about.

What “owning it” means is that you have been dealt this hand, so play it full out. This is your journey - your life, your children, your home, your goals. It is to be led by you and no one else. These are your rules, your traditions, your dreams, your adventures, all designed by you for you and your children. You have one shot at this, so do it with meaning, purpose, intention, and to full capacity. You’re raising humans with memories, mindsets, and attitudes. Do this well, momma.

This situation you’re in is a blessing in disguise. It is not a curse. It is not

punishment. It is a gift. Accept the gift and embrace your journey. Go have fun in the precious time you have with your kids. Be a Rockstar Single Mother.

Who is this article for?

While all are welcome, this column is intended for single mothers carrying the domestic labor, the responsibility of raising the children when in your home, and the financial responsibility for your home and family as well. ‘Single’ can arise from being single, divorced, separated, or widowed. It doesn’t matter how you got here. You’re here.

This column set out to inspire, mentor, develop, and support single moms who want to raise exceptional kids on their terms, despite the hurdles along the way.

Christine Conte is an ICF PCC Credentialed Certified Life & Leadership Coach, a Certified Confidence Coach, and Certified Parenting Coach. Christine is a published author, speaker, and conducts workshops on a variety of topics including empowerment, communication, life purpose, & vision boards. As a Rockstar Single Mom for 18 years, Christine raised two incredible daughters on her own and on her own terms despite many impediments. She’s helped women become empowered in the face of difficult life challenges, particularly divorce and single parenting, as a professional coach for over eight years. You can contact Christine at: www.ChristineConteCoaching. com and www.DivorceCoachingSystem.com. You can also join the Rockstar Single Mom Facebook community here.

RECLAIMING YOURSELF, ONE DAY AT A TIME

BY LORI MURPHY

The Power of a 30-Day Reset

Have you ever looked in the mirror and thought, “I just don’t feel like myself anymore”?

Maybe the weight of responsibilities has piled up. Maybe your energy is low, your mind is foggy, or you’re carrying bloat, burnout, or just a quiet sadness you can’t shake. I’ve been there—and so have so many of the women I coach. That’s why I created the 30-Day Reset. Not as a punishment or a push, but as an invitation. To come back home to yourself.

This reset isn’t about perfection. It’s not a crash diet, detox gimmick, or fitness challenge. It’s a soulful, sustainable journey designed to help you reconnect with your body, reset your nervous system, and reclaim your inner fire—one simple step at a time.

Here’s how it works, and how you can begin your own reset right now.

Step 1: Start With Stillness

Before changing your routine, start with your awareness. Ask yourself: “Where in my life am I giving everything away… and leaving myself behind?”

From this place of reflection, we begin with gentle grounding. Each morning, I start with a nourishing ritual: a few sips of warm lemon water with aloe, a deep breath, and a moment of stillness before the world rushes in. This small but sacred pause creates a ripple that sets the tone for the day ahead.

Step 2: Nourish, Don’t Restrict

Forget fad diets or obsessive tracking. This reset invites you to listen to your body. It focuses on anti-inflammatory, whole foods that leave you feeling energized and satisfied—not deprived.

Some of my favorites:

• 2 hard-boiled eggs with berries

• A tuna-chickpea salad with olive oil and lemon

• Hummus with cucumbers and carrots

• A plant-based protein shake with almond milk, cinnamon, and banana

It’s not about being “good.” It’s about being loving—to yourself.

Step 3: Move with Intention

Movement isn’t punishment—it’s a celebration. Whether it’s a 15-minute walk, gentle yoga, or strength training in your living room, the 30-Day Reset encourages low-impact movement that works with your energy, not against it.

Some days you’ll feel strong and sweaty. Other days, a stretch and deep breath will be enough. Both are worthy. Both are progress.

Step 4: Reflect and Realign

This is what sets the 30-Day Reset apart. Every week, there’s a journaling prompt to help you check in—not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually.

Here’s one to try right now:

“What does ‘reset’ mean for me in this

season of life?”

“What am I ready to let go of?”

When you write without censoring, something magical happens—you begin to remember the woman you are underneath the noise.

The Shift Is Real

I have completed the reset myself and will shared powerful changes: My bloat is gone, my abs are showing, and I feel so proud again. I cry after workouts—not from pain, but from finally showing up for myself. This changed how I eat, move, and think… it gave me ME back.

This journey isn’t just physical. It’s emotional. It’s spiritual. It’s transformative.

Ready to Begin?

You don’t need to wait for the perfect time. You just need to take the first step.

I’ve created a free 30-Day Reset Starter Kit to help you begin gently—at your pace, with grace.

You can DM me the word RESET on Instagram (@lori_murphy_coaching) or contact me at www.lorimurphycoaching. com to book a call and chat about how I can support you.

It’s time to put yourself back on your own priority list.

You don’t need a complete overhaul. You just need a reset—and you deserve it.

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

ONE SECOND. ONE DECISION. A WHOLE NEW LIFE.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

BY NATASHA POLITO

In January, I wrote that you’re only one second away from changing your life. Back then, it was an idea I believed in. Now, I’ve lived it.

Are you happy with where you are right now? I’ve been on a journey of tough decisions, the kind we all face sooner or later. The decision to stay or to go. To book that safari in Africa or to serve drinks on a beach somewhere.

I grew up watching my mother and my Godmother retire in their mid-40s. Now that I’m here myself, I remembered the promise I made years ago: to start living on my terms before the stress of life took a toll on my health. I didn’t have a pension, and my savings weren’t enough to stop working, but I knew I could still make changes to increase my peace of mind.

It all came to a head on New Year’s Eve. I was sitting in my office, working a job I loved, with people I loved, in a career I had built since I was sixteen. My computer screen glowed with yet another repetitive task I’d done a thousand times before. I was good at it, but it didn’t light me up anymore. I was one of the few working that holiday eve, and I knew that within the next hour I would wrap up that chapter of my life and start the new year somewhere completely different.

I took off the golden handcuffs.

Since then, my life has shifted in ways I couldn’t have imagined. I work from home in a new house with a smaller mortgage. I sold my car and my cabin. I no longer battle a long commute, and I have more time to rest and recharge.

Has it all been perfect? Absolutely not. There have been “what the f*” moments. Times I questioned whether I made the right call. But looking back now, as I still unbox my house, am learning my new job, and living in a town where I don’t know many people, I know it was worth it.

That’s the truth about life changes. They’re not about guaranteeing comfort. They’re about choosing courage. Maybe the new job won’t work out. Maybe the house won’t sell for what you hoped. Maybe the curveballs will come faster than you expect. But if you keep your goal in sight and stick to your plan, the payoff is real. You will no longer feel trapped, you will feel empowered.

My results? The house sold for more than we thought. The cabin was bought by out-of-town family. The convertible is off to meet its new owner. I still feel like I have to prove myself at my new job, but those nerves will fade in time.

Really, everything worked out.

You’re one second away from changing your life. One second to decide. One second to leap. What’s the decision you’ll make today before another year passes you by?

{

FOR YOUR EMOTIONAL HEALTH }

IS IT TIME TO REFRESH YOUR DECOR?

YOU ARE ENOUGH.

BY NICOLE HEROUX WILLIAMS I PHOTOS BY NSP STUDIO

BY CHELSEA BOE

The unseen reasons your home should be your best friend.

Pouring into your home is time that’s never wasted. Our home is the one thing that supports and nurtures us, always. A home that feels ready for inviting over a friend, hosting a dinner, or even a home that’s easy to get ready to leave is a space that serves us. If your home isn’t supportive of your favorite things and daily routines, you might get the urge to change things up. When you feel the urge to declutter, shop for new decor, or start a diy project it can feel overwhelming. The intention behind revamping your space is almost as important as the process itself in order to curate a home style that lasts. The importance of a space you are head over heels for goes far beyond just a trip to a home goods store.

Refreshing decor provides dynamicism in your life. We create new neural pathways when our brain takes in new experiences and discovers new things we love. Especially finding new home decor styles and artwork. As you grow more into yourself, refining and editing your home help create an environment that nurtures who you are now.

-Packing for an outdoor activity feels hectic.

-Things have started stacking up in the garage.

-Your entryway looks like a drop zone.

-Your kiddos closet still has clothes from previous sizes and seasons.

your house that support you. When your home functions in a way that soothes you, it’s the most calming experience you can have.

Refreshing decor in a space invites in new emotional responses. When our brain takes in something new, especially something beautiful, we create a pattern of expecting joy and beauty. Our brain looks for more proof of what we see. If you see beauty, your brain shows you more beauty. When you see order, organization, and clear surfaces it invites you to start something new. There’s room in your thought-space (and home) to have new ideas rather than to-dos.

-When you pull out tubberware it causes an avalanche.

-You have 8 pairs of scissors and you can’t find one.

Life doesn’t always change in big or small moments, but often by small refinements as you go.

Here are a few signs it’s time to refresh your space:

The most important purpose of a home is to create a place that nurtures you. The closet full of folded towels, the armoire with fresh linens, and a credenza organized with your favorite art supplies are all examples of different spaces in

Though it’s different for everyone, there are a few ways to create calm, uplifting emotional responses in your space. A tranquil home is all about comforting your nervous system.

A few ways to help your home feel calm:

-I love adding a small basket of folded white washcloths by every sink.

-Salt lamps, diffusers, a tray with palo santo or sage to burn.

-A basket with a single blanket or towel folded inside on each bench or bed is nice.

-I love salt scrubs and lotions by each sink to maximize the self care experience in little ways.

A home that actively calms you gives you the energy you need to pour into

“Art pieces that are unique to you and your taste show you and everyone who enters your home a peek

into your soul.”

the people you love and the community around you.

Refreshing decor helps support artists and evolves your art collection. Art that feels like you ensures your home is the first place you feel seen. Art pieces that are unique to you and your taste show you and everyone who enters your home a peek into your soul. Connections that speak to your heart can be rare, and being able to communicate the whispers of your soul is a gift. The way we are able to use artwork to display ourselves transcends the human body. The beauty and hope art can create within you surpasses the

monotony of daily routine. Taking time to get lost creating, embracing emotion, and enjoying beauty are the unseen threads behind our life’s woven tapestry. Styling a space that allows you to have those moments will fill your soul in ways that cannot be written.

Even when we are alone, we can be connected to others through the decor in our home. Things that have been gifted, artwork from a friend, even paintings from a local artist are all ways to feel connected and seen within your space. Connecting with the world through art is a constant reminder that there

is so much more to see, and so much love around.

A well watered home can create to a well watered soul that doesn’t need to go anywhere to find peace. Pouring into your home will always be something that pours back into you. Contrary to what we think when we are growing up, freedom isn’t always the ability to go anywhere you want. Freedom is the ability to stay, to not move, to choose to refrain from something that doesn’t serve you, to create whatever sets your soul on fire, and to feel peace right where you are.

CURIOSITY AS A KEY TO PEACE

BY LISA WAGNER

Creatively Opening Up Our Minds

Curiosity, according to the Mirriam Webster Dictionary, is an “interest leading to inquiry.” I think about our six month old and two-year-old granddaughters, Ava and Emmy and their inquisitiveness about pretty much everything. Ava has an openness and willingness to learn and question everything. There is no bias, prejudice, expectation or ingrained belief system. Emmy can’t get enough of the world around her and its ever changing landscape with new things to take in or discover. She loves everyone and hasn’t begun to fear almost anything. It has made me reevaluate how I approach both the unknown and my longheld beliefs. Is there room for change, expansion through exploration? Without ego, of course there is. Curiosity may be our way to finally find personal and worldwide peace.

Religious beliefs have caused the majority of conflict in the world. There is a staunchness around belief systems, religious teachings and the fear of damnation. For those being taught that your religion is the only true way to Salvation limits how we view others and the world around us. It creates prejudices, hate and a dependency upon the church for how we should be, behave and treat one another. Pope Leo XIV has begun to break some of these religious stereotypes by asking world leaders to recognize their responsibility to bring about peace and how their actions impact the local population. On August 10th, the pope made an appeal to them to “..always keep in mind the responsibility for the consequences of their choices on populations. May they not ignore the

needs of the most vulnerable and the universal desire for peace.” This plea by such a major religious figure asks not only our leaders but each of us to become curious about what those who are affected are impacted. To imagine ourselves in their shoes and what would we want for our families and ourselves? The first thing that springs to mind for me is the need for safety and freedom. Consequently, the next logical question is, how do each of us do our part to help ensure that for them? This thought process allows us to be of service to the least of us and become a catalyst for positive change.

The National Institute of Health, (NIH), describes curiosity as “the thought of as the noblest of human drives, and is just as often as it is denigrated as dangerous (as in the expression “curiosity killed the cat”).” The NIH observed that the nature of our curiosity has been woefully misunderstood as to its origins and how it is driven. Nonetheless, it has garnered exploration from some of the greatest minds in psychology. Yet, there are so many questions that linger around it. Thankfully, it has become one of the most studied psychological happenings in recent history whose methods of observation and research are ever-evolving. Hence, curiosity itself in the research field is in play. Researcher, George Lowenstein (1994), found that curiosity occurs when we have a gap in knowledge. If we are less confident in our beliefs, our minds seek to fill those gaps. When more confident, our willingness to seek a differing viewpoint diminishes. This is where we can each make a shift in our thinking.

As an artist, I am always trying to push the envelope with my intuitive acrylic work. I want the viewer to question the areas they feel the most confident and steadfast. To be inquisitive about the meaning behind a piece and how it speaks to them. Could it be that their assumptions about a given subject are incorrect or have gaps? Is there room for them to reconsider their position? When a viewer is open to being vulnerable and possesses a desire to grow, the possibility for them to expand their predisposition towards empathy and compassion is where positive change can take hold and proliferate. It also allows me to feel free to experiment and let go of my own expectations for a piece or my habitual methods of creating. Discovery of new applications and approaches to getting a desired outcome is the most exciting part of what I do. The possibilities are endlessly surprising and so exciting.

“Curiosity about life in all of its aspects, I think, is still the secret of great creative people.”

Leo Burnett

Discoveries have been made just by questioning belief systems. Take for instance gravity or the earth being round, not flat were brought about through a wondering and then experimentation and observation. Does something fall faster if it is denser? Why does the hull of a ship disappear at the horizon line before the mast? These types of questions can be rephrased when speaking to someone that believes the antithesis of what you hold dear. How did they come to that conclusion and do they ever question it? Is it okay for them to question the belief? If not, why does it stay non-

{ A WOMAN’S PERSPECTIVE } { MANIFESTING YOUR TRUE PURPOSE }

“If you make a commitment to yourself to be lovingly curious about everything, your journey towards that release of suffering will begin to show up as a loving knowingness.”

negotiable for them? Shutting down our propensity to question all things, is a means of control and a resulting subservience. We can easily become beholden to what we are told to never call into question and be manipulated by the powers that be. Breaking the chains of mind control begins the journey of your own personal freedoms. What hypothesises have you had preached to you since childhood that still remain? Do they give way to a loving service for you and others? If not, delve into the “why” or “how” of it.

“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.”

Albert Einstein

Buddhism teachings speak of curiosity as an essential and loving quality. It, however, is a more specific type of curiosity. One that calls into question the root of suffering. Once instituted,

it is a cessation of suffering and pain through mindfulness and meditation. There are two terms in Buddhism that refer to this practice; Dhamma Vicaya (“investigation of phenomena”) and Yoniso Manasikara (“wise or appropriate attention”). Dhamma Vicaya is one of the Five Factors of Awakening. It involves the examination of your own experiences and the discernment of either blind acceptance or rejection based on our own notions. Yoniso Manasikara asks us to look into the root causes of any given situation or circumstance to gain an expanded understanding. A deep trust in the Buddhist teachings to have curiosity and not follow any teachings blindly. It is believed to be that useful for our own ascension. Our granddaughters still possess the “beginner’s mind” that hasn’t been corrupted by judgment or expectations due to our life experiences. We can do and be that again once we open ourselves to that mindset again. It was and still is our most essential selves.

There are many who are in power now who hope you never become curious or ask questions. That you blindly follow their lead and their policies in order to control you into doing what is best for them. Instead, be a thought warrior by getting curious about your own beliefs or fear of beginning a new way of being. Has your fear dictated too much of your life and held emotional freedom at bay? If you make a commitment to yourself to be lovingly curious about everything, your journey towards that release of suffering will begin to show up as a loving knowingness. Our world could and can find its way towards something more beautiful and loving if we each committed to this kind of heart expansion. Anger, hate and fear would fade and we can all walk together in the light and save all living beings and our planet. Isn’t that the hope we are all working towards on our journey here?

YOUR BODY IS YOUR HOME, LISTEN TO IT

BY MEG TOBIN

Welcome back to Breathing Space, a monthly column where we slow down, reconnect with our bodies, and build a personal toolbox for resilience. I’m Meg Tobin, LMHC, a body-centered psychotherapist, retreat leader, and end-of-life doula. I’m so glad you’ve taken a moment to be here.

Each day, we live in our bodies. From our very first breath to our very last, our body is our constant companion, our home. Yet, how often do we pause to really listen to it? How often do we nourish it—not just with food and movement, but with attention and kindness?

In our busy lives, it’s easy to override the subtle signs our body sends. We push through headaches with another cup of coffee. We fight sleep to check one more email. We silence hunger with distraction instead of nourishment. Little by little, that disconnection grows until we’re operating on autopilot— present in body but absent in awareness.

But what if, instead of pushing through, we paused?

What if we got curious about what our body might be trying to say?

One of the simplest and most powerful ways to do this is through a body scan meditation—a gentle, mindful practice that invites us back into relationship with ourselves.

Why

a Body Scan Matters

Our bodies are speaking to us all day long:

Goosebumps? You’re cold—grab a sweater.

Stomach growling? Time to eat.

Shoulders creeping toward your ears? You’re holding tension—time to soften.

Heavy eyes? You need rest.

Yet, in a world of buzzing notifications, endless to-do lists, and constant responsibility, these signals often get drowned out. When we miss them, we can end up irritable, fatigued, or burned out before we even realize what happened.

Practicing a body scan is like fine-tuning the dial on your inner radio so you can hear those messages more clearly. Over time, you begin to recognize your body’s patterns—when you’re approaching overwhelm, when stress is settling in, or when your energy reserves are running low. And once you notice, you can respond with clarity rather than collapse.

Try This Simple Body Scan

You don’t need special equipment, a yoga mat, or a long block of time. This short version is perfect for beginners or anyone who needs a quick reset during a busy day.

Get Comfortable

Sit or lie down somewhere quiet. Let your hands rest on your lap or belly.

Take

a

Few Deep Breaths

Inhale through your nose, exhale through your mouth. Let your belly rise and fall.

Bring Attention to

Your Body

Start at your feet and slowly move upward:

Feet Legs Hips

Belly Chest Back Arms Hands Neck Face

Notice Without Judgment

What sensations are present? Warmth, tingling, tension, stillness, heaviness? Simply observe. There’s nothing to fix—only to notice.

Close Gently

Take one last deep breath. Feel your whole body together as one. Notice if anything has shifted, even subtly.

Want a Deeper Experience?

If you’d like to go further, you can scan the QR code below to access a full guided body scan. Many people find this extended version offers even more release, insight, and calm.

Pause & Breathe

The more often we practice tuning into our body, the more natural it becomes. Just like strengthening a muscle, each repetition builds our capacity for awareness. Over time, you may notice it’s easier to relax your shoulders, steady your breathing, or give yourself what you truly need—whether that’s water, movement, rest, or a moment of stillness.

And if you’re ready for an immersive experience of rest, healing, and reconnection, I invite you to join me this October in Ireland for Daughters of Ériú, a soul-nourishing retreat among the sacred sites and wild beauty of the Irish landscape. Together, we’ll breathe, move, and remember who we are—beyond the noise, beyond the rush, in deep connection with ourselves and each other.

What did you notice in your body today?

I’d love to hear from you. Email me at meg@therapycny.com or visit www. breathingspacepsychotherapy.com to learn more about my work and upcoming retreats.

LATE SUMMER MINDFULNESS PRACTICES

BY KAITLYN VITTOZZI

To Keep You Healthy and Happy

Years ago, I was standing in my aunt’s kitchen out east. She’s a mom of four. It was early August, and the following words she spoke chilled me to my bones. “I haven’t been back to school in decades, but I still get this end of summer feeling, I hate it.” There is change in the air. There’s a John Mayer lyric that always sticks with me, “When autumn comes, it doesn’t ask.

It just walks in where it left you last. You never know when it starts. Until there’s fog inside the glass around. Your summer heart.”

In terms of weather, summer 2025 in Rochester has DELIVERED. The heat, the sun, the lack of rain in June and July. Autumn doesn’t start until September 22nd so here are a few of my favorite ways to really embrace and accept the summer that is here now, so when it is time to say goodbye – we leave it with no regrets, and maybe even a little personal growth.

Hug a Tree: Embrace your inner hippie and go for a walk somewhere you can get some quiet time – not necessarily silence but just away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Take a walk without your headphones or looking at your phone and see which tree speaks to you, if not right away, walk around for a few minutes. When the right tree shows itself to you, approach it how you would like to be approached by a person - warmly in your own way. Then wrap your arms around it for a hug. Share something you would like it to know, stay as long as you need.

Before walking away after, pause and check in with your breath.

Embrace the Water: End of summer can start to feel stagnant, tight, and rushed in body or mind. Add a little fluidity to your routine by going for a swim, or signing up for a class in or on the water. Paddleboard yoga, windsurfing (late summer is SO windy in Western NY), or even staying on the land and painting en plein air can bring profound presence. Haven’t tried kayaking or paddling? There is still time to find balance between the hot and dry and cool and fluid. Personally, I had a profound experience in August waters back in 2020. I taught paddleboard yoga in Canandaigua. I enjoyed the hot June and July water, but by late August, the mornings would make me a bit goosebumpy. Internally, that made me prickly. The internal dialog of “Why do I do this? This is a stupid passion project? What idiot stands in the water at 8:30 am with a chill?” –was purely negative. With a little more mindful awareness practice a few years in, I realized that day that temperatures and goosebumps are just that, and how lucky I am to have a body that can stand in the water pain-free.

Cooling Breath: Some of us, honestly, might be burnt out from this summer. Here’s a quick way to cool down, I do this all the time with my yoga therapy clients. Inhale normally. On your exhale, stick your tongue out of your mouth and roll it like a hot dog bun. (It’s kind of like you’re sticking a straw out of your mouth.) Exhale through your tongue. Repeat at least 10 times or until you feel cooler.

Savoring

Seasonal Produce: There’s no better time to really slow down to help preserve your energy than late summer. Yoga and ayurveda recommend eating as much local produce as possible yearround, and we have plenty of variety locally right now. Wash it lovingly in your sink, maybe with some white vinegar. Taking time to prepare it, whether it be chopping, cooking or seasoning can be very grounding - even if you don’t get the same convenience factor you would from buying it pre-cut at a grocery store. Use your five senses, almost like meditation when you eat. First, take in the colors. There’s a vibrancy that happens in summer that doesn’t happen the other three seasons of the year for raspberries and zucchini. Hear it on your fork or in your hands. Smell it, noticing if you experience differently between one nostril and the other. Let it sit on your tongue before chewing it, taking in its texture. Feel the crispness or smoothness on your tastebuds. And for the love of God put your cellphone away while eating. You’ll digest it better. I hope with these tips, when autumn does show up, you’ll be ready for it, rebalanced and not forlorn. You’ll have given summer the full attention you needed to this year.

Questions? Are you in a demanding role that’s taking a toll? Visit PenfieldYogaTherapy.com, I would love to hear from you.

STEERING YOUR LIFE

Harnessing Passion & Purpose on the Open Water

“It’s not about the destination; it’s about the journey.”

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Passion is the engine that propels both a schooner and a soul forward. Just as a steady breeze brings the historic When And If schooner to life, your passion infuses energy into every endeavor and attracts kindred spirits along the way. Passion creates energy and is magnetic. When you let your love for a pursuit shine, you become a beacon that others naturally gravitate toward.

What are you passionate about? Once you have invested in and believe in yourself, people will see your value. Your compassionate, loving heart will shine through and people will willingly and cheerfully invest in you. Continue to sow seeds of love wherever you go.

The LORI Factor at Sea: Living the Life You Were Born to Live

On the deck of the When And If, every moment is a chance to put the four pillars of The LORI Factor into practice:

• Larger Vision: See yourself beyond present circumstances, like gazing toward a limitless horizon over Lake Ontario.

• Optimism: Welcome the possibility that the winds can change in your favor, and that you can set a new course at any moment.

• Reinvent Yourself: Don’t be confined to a single identity. Let each challenge become an invitation to grow, just as the schooner found new purpose in every era of its journey.

• Invest in Yourself: Ultimately, when you commit to your personal growth, your worth

BY LORI BRUTON

becomes unmistakable and those around you will respond with belief and support.

Sailing with Heart: The Power of Steering Your Life

Truly magnetic people don’t just speak about love and passion, they steer their life, time and time again, sowing seeds of connection, kindness, and authenticity. The When And If’s captain and crew exemplify this lesson. Their dedication and spirit of camaraderie transform each voyage into a lesson on teamwork and wholehearted living.

• Move forward with an open, giving heart.

• Value progress over perfection; each new tack on the water offers an opportunity for discovery.

• Remember: consistency, love, and presence build true legacy.

Anchor points for those seeking transformation…

• “We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.”

— Dolly Parton

• “Your heart is the compass. Passion provides the wind. Set sail boldly and trust the journey.”

— Lori Bruton

Take the Helm: Become the Captain of Your Life

Passion is both your compass and propulsion. When you believe in yourself and invest with intention, you become irresistible and a source of hope, energy, and inspiration. Captain Sean Flynn inspired me as he expertly manned the helm and directed the crew on the When And If.

Step onto your imaginary schooner, look beyond the immediate shore, and let your passion catch the wind. Your journey, like that of the When And If, can become a living legacy, touching lives and lighting

the way for others to follow.

Are you tied to the dock and stuck on shore? Maybe you want to go places but you don’t know where to go or how to get there. Choose a direction and explore. Even if you don’t currently have transportation, travel in your mind’s eye. Paint a vision and set your course.

What brings you fun, freedom, and fulfillment? For me, it’s being in or on the water. I got to have adventures and made memories that I will treasure forever. Hopefully, I can acquire reliable transportation soon so that I can experience more travel. In the meantime, I can write about them and share my discoveries with you.

It was a privilege to be on this podcast: Travels With Jim and Rita. Episode 46 was about Breaking Through Barriers: How Lori Bruton Found Hope Through

Travel and Writing

I talk about what happens when you combine a passion for travel, a gift for storytelling, and a heart for helping others overcome their deepest struggles. Listen as I share my remarkable journey from trauma to transformation.

Let my pivotal moments that shaped my path as an author, travel writer, speaker, and guide inspire you. I reveal my story of childhood road trips that sparked my love for exploration and continues through personal challenges that nearly broke my spirit. With raw honesty, I share how these experiences led to the development of a unique approach and resources that address trauma stored at the cellular level.

Some exciting adventures have taken me swimming with dolphins and flying on private jets to the Bahamas, despite once being so terrified of flying that I avoided

{ THE LORI FACTOR }

“Just as a steady breeze brings the historic When And If schooner to life, your passion infuses energy into every endeavor and attracts kindred spirits along the way.”

private jets to the Bahamas, despite once being so terrified of flying that I avoided planes for twenty years. Through faith, determination, courage, essential oils, I conquered those fears and now help others break through their own limitations.

No stopping me now. I discussed traveling with mobility challenges. This is a topic that many avoid but one that affects countless wanderers worldwide.

Healing with Writing and On the Open Water

How does this benefit you? I offer not only travel tips, but also practical insights for aspiring travelers and writers, who want to break into freelance travel writing, crafting case studies (customer success stories), and using personal newsletters to connect authentically with readers. My journey from writing personalized poems for my son’s teachers to publishing books with forewords by renowned motivational speaker Les Brown demonstrates how passion and perseverance can transform dreams into reality.

Travel and Journaling Enhance Mental Well-Being

• Travel journaling not only will capture the details of your adventures, like the sights, sounds, smells, and emotions you experienced, but it will preserve those memories and encourage gratitude.

• Intentionally journaling about your travels and thoughts allows you to immerse yourself in the present moment and observe your surroundings. It deepens your appreciation for the places you visit, rather than rushing through the experience.

• Travel can be a transformative experience. Journaling provides a space for reflection on how these experiences impact you. It can help you process emotions, gain insights into

your motivations, values, and beliefs, and ultimately contribute to personal growth.

• Writing about your travel experiences, especially any challenges or unexpected situations, can be therapeutic and healing. It provides an outlet for processing emotions, which can help reduce stress and anxiety related not only to travel, but also life in general.

• Write it down so that you can explore what truly matters to you. You can identify patterns in your emotions and behaviors and gain clarity that will enhance self-discovery and purpose.

• Pen to paper stirs creativity and inspires new ideas, solutions, and more places to see and leaves a legacy.

Why the Open Water is My Happy Place

Being near water (known as “blue space”), can significantly benefit mental health. Did you know that exposure to water can reduce stress, improve mood, enhance cognitive function, and even promote physical activity?

The water’s sights and sounds are proven to have calming effects. I am my own case study proving that to be true, whether it’s kayaking, swimming, sailing, or just sitting by the water. It gives me a sense of calm and peacefulness.

Enjoy and Experience the Benefits

• Stress Reduction and Relaxation

The gentle sounds of water, such as waves or a flowing lake or river, can create a meditative and relaxing atmosphere, helping to lower heart rate and blood pressure.

• Improved Mood and Mental Well-being Being near water produces feelings of calm and positivity. Studies have shown that individuals who spend time near water report higher levels of well-being and lower risks of depression.

• Enhanced Cognitive Function

The calming effect of water improves focus,