Welcome to Teen Talk
Lesson 8: Sexual Violence Prevention
Welcome Question
Who is someone you really respect and why?
Group Norms
Calming Strategies
breathe in breathe out
Content Warning
This lesson may be activating. Be gentle with yourself and each other...
breathe in breathe out
Agenda
✓ Opening Routine
❑ Intro to Power Dynamics
❑ Sexual Violence Definitions
❑ Rights & Resources
❑ Responding to Harm
❑ Frankie’s Story
❑ Closing Routine
Intro to Power Dynamics
Intro to Power Dynamics
Who are the people in our world that tend to have a lot of power?
Race, class, and gender norms can socialize people to believe that they deserve power…
Laws and other systems are designed to enable them to retain their power while creating barriers for other people.
Intro to Power Dynamics
Our society expects the individual to protect themself from harm…
but “victim blaming” causes guilt and harm by diverting attention from the real issue:
Unequal power dynamics make it impossible for many people to avoid harm.
Intro to Power Dynamics
We cannot control what someone else chooses to do…
We can only hold ourselves and each other accountable for treating people with respect.
Intro to Power Dynamics
It’s everyone’s job to help reduce violence in our communities by staying aware of power dynamics and doing our best to balance them.
Consent Review CONSENT
Consent Review
Consent Review
conversation about boundaries
sober voluntary
sexual
over 18 equal power informed clear reversible
a mutual agreement active
In CA, we use an Affirmative Consent Standard to ensure that everyone has agency in sexual situations.
Waiting to hear “no” or “stop” is NOT affirmative consent.
Sexual arousal is NOT affirmative consent.
This standard makes each of us responsible for being aware, checking in, and not taking advantage of others.
Disrespect & Harm
There are many laws designed to protect people from being touched or treated in certain ways without their consent
These apply to ALL people, whether they are strangers, friends, dating, married, etc.
Disrespect & Harm
The following behaviors are inappropriate and unacceptable (and illegal) because they are unwanted, disrespectful, and harmful
If you need to talk to someone… no judgment, no shame
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Title IX (“nine”)
In California, Title IX requires that schools protect students and staff from gender-based discrimination:
• Sexual violence, coercion, or harassment
• Unfair treatment due to gender identity, expression, or sexual orientation
• Hostile learning or working environments
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Sexual Harassment
Any sexual communication that makes someone else feel uncomfortable.
Unwanted sexual comments, requests, or spreading rumors about someone
Name-calling or joking about someone’s body, experience, or identity
Continuing to pursue someone when they are clearly uninterested
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Sexual Harassment
Any sexual communication that makes someone else feel uncomfortable.
Whether it happens…
• in-person or digitally
• directly or indirectly
• on purpose or “just kidding”
sexual harassment is never OK.
Title IX (“nine”)
This law requires that schools protect students and staff from gender-based discrimination:
Sexual violence, coercion, or harassment
Unfair treatment due to gender identity, expression, or sexual orientation
Hostile learning or working environments
To learn more, check out: www.knowyourix.org
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Sexual Assault
ANY unwanted sexual contact
Physical contact:
• Touching someone’s genitals or other private body parts
• Kissing someone without consent
• Taking off someone’s clothes
• Making someone touch another person in a sexual way
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
If we genuinely make a mistake and do or say something hurtful:
✓ take accountability
✓ apologize
✓ learn from it
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Sexual Assault
ANY unwanted sexual contact
Visual contact:
• “Flashing” (exposing genitals or other private body parts)
• Taking, showing, or sending sexual pictures or videos
• Making someone touch their own body in a sexual way
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Sexual Assault
Rape is any type of sex without consent
This includes penetration of a vagina, anus, or mouth using a body part or an object
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
Labor trafficking – work as repayment for a loan or service, or to avoid an unwanted consequence
National Human Trafficking Hotline: 1-888-373-7888
National Human Trafficking Hotline: 1-888-373-7888
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
NOTE: If someone is doing sex work under age 18, they cannot be charged with sex trafficking
Sex trafficking – sexual services in exchange for money, drugs, or basic needs (food, shelter, etc.)
National Human Trafficking Hotline: 1-888-373-7888
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
It may involve other sexual crimes, like harassment, assault, or creating child sexual abuse material…
National Human Trafficking Hotline: 1-888-373-7888
Laws About Sexual Images
Child Sexual Abuse Material (Federal) – creating, viewing, or sharing nude or sexual images of a minor (under 18 years old)
Cyber Exploitation (CA) – sharing sexual images of another person without their consent, resulting in emotional distress
Sextortion (CA) – threatening to share or expose sexual images in order to get someone to do something
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Remember…
The body may have a fight, flight, or freeze reaction, but regardless of a person’s reaction in the moment…
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
NO ONE deserves to be exploited or harmed, and we are not responsible for anyone else’s decisions or behavior.
Let’s Take a Moment to…
Responding to Harm
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Marco’s Scenario
My uncle always invites his friends over to hang out at our house. Last weekend, one of them came up to me in private and said that I’m looking really grown and sexy. Then she looked down at my crotch and reached her hand over. I froze and didn’t know how to react…
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
What Would You Do?
If you were Marco’s cousin…
What Would You Do?
1. Tell your uncle what happened. He should not invite that person over anymore.
2. Confront the woman and tell her to leave Marco alone. Adults should never touch a young person in sexual ways.
1 2 3 4
5 (center)
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
After Marco’s Scenario
3. Text a sexual assault hotline. Ask them how to support Marco with his situation.
5 (center)
4. Remind Marco that he did nothing wrong. It’s normal for the body to freeze up, and that doesn’t mean that Marco wanted her to do that.
5. Encourage Marco to forget about it. He should feel lucky that an older woman was interested in him.
1 2 3 4
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Marco is confused and upset about what his uncle’s friend did. He had an erection in the moment, but that didn’t mean he wanted her to touch him. Marco feels embarrassed and alone, like people would just brush it off if he tried to tell someone. He feels even more powerless when his girlfriend Jenna breaks up with him out of the blue. Marco decides to take back some control by getting revenge on his ex…
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Jenna’s Scenario
I can’t stand going to school anymore! A few days ago, I broke up with my boyfriend, and to get back at me, he sent a topless photo of me to all his friends. Now everyone at school has seen it and people keep staring and joking about me being a “slut”…
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
After Jenna’s Scenario
Jenna was humiliated and couldn’t believe that Marco would do that to her. She was so into him at the time, she wasn’t thinking about the risks of sending a topless pic, but now she regrets ever taking that photo. Jenna can’t stand the harassment but is worried that telling an adult will only get her in trouble. She feels powerless, and decides to take back some control by turning the spotlight onto another classmate…
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
What Would You Do?
1. Not get involved. The situation involves nude images of a minor, so I don’t want to get in trouble too.
2. Talk it through with a trusted adult at home. Get their advice about what to do next.
What Would You Do?
1. Check in with Avery later. Acknowledge that what happened was not OK and ask how I can help.
2. Comment on the post to call out the transphobia. It’s not funny to joke about trans identity, and it’s none of our business what other people have in their pants anyways.
3. Nothing. Standing up for Avery might make me a target for harassment too.
4. Send Jenna a private message. Tell her it’s messed up and she should remove that post and apologize.
If you were Avery’s classmate… 1 2 3 4
5. Tell an adult at school. They need to know what’s going on since Avery is getting bullied.
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
3. Stand up to the students harassing Jenna. Tell them to knock it off, and that they need to delete that photo immediately.
5 (center)
4. Tell a school counselor. They could call in Hector and his parents to talk about what he did.
5. Ask Jenna how I can support her. Remind her that she doesn’t deserve to be harassed like this.
If you were Jenna’s friend… 1 2 3 4
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Avery’s Scenario
Yesterday during lunch, a girl in my class posted a meme making fun of trans people and tagged me in it. When our classmates started seeing the post, they were all shocked and started laughing, asking me if it was true. Then one person yelled “prove it!” and tried to pull down my pants…
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673 5 (center)
Responding to Harm
Sexual
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
When one person experiences harm, there is often a ripple effect…
But experiencing harm or exploitation does not give us an excuse to hurt others.
Remember…
Sexual violence is NOT about sexual desire – it’s an act of power and control.
No one deserves to be harmed or exploited.
Everyone deserves to feel safe and to have their body and boundaries respected.
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Remember…
Reach out and get help from a trusted adult:
✓ parent or guardian
✓ older sibling or cousin
✓ aunt or uncle
✓ grandparent
✓ family friend
✓ friend’s parent
How to Help a Friend
• Remind them that it’s not their fault
• Listen without judgment and mirror their language
• Ask if they feel safe and how you can help
• Encourage them to report by telling a trusted adult, visiting a local hospital, or calling 911
• Empower then to make their own decisions
The choice belongs to the survivor.
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
How to Help Our Community
How can we build a safer community with more respect and less violence?
• Educate others about affirmative consent
• Do NOT make rape jokes or use violent or derogatory words
• Establish a code or signal to check in with our friends
• Take accountability when we harm others
• Call out situations where unequal power dynamics may lead to exploitation
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
✓ teacher
✓ principal
✓ counselor
✓ coach
✓ nurse or doctor
✓ caregiver
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
How to Help Our Community
How can we build a safer community with more respect and less violence?
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Calming Strategies
Power & Exploitation
Most violence – including sexual violence – is motivated by a desire for power and control.
People who commit harm often look for certain traits or situations to exploit…
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
Traffickers target those with an obvious vulnerability or need they can fulfill and often use grooming techniques to build a false sense of trust…
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
“Gorilla” traffickers use force or threats to overpower
“Romeo” traffickers use charm, gifts, or romance to seduce
“CEO” traffickers use money or business strategies to swindle
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Human Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to perform manual labor or sex work
This modern-day slavery takes place all over the world, including our own communities…
An estimated 50 million people worldwide are victimized through human trafficking on any given day.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Sex Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to do sexual things in exchange for anything of value
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Sex Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to do sexual things in exchange for anything of value
Sex traffickers will often intimidate, manipulate, or fake caring for someone to hide their exploitation by promising protection, love, money, or fame
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Sex Trafficking
Forcing, tricking, or convincing someone to do sexual things in exchange for anything of value
Traffickers are incredibly crafty… They may use social media and/or recruiters to target people and learn more about them
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Sex Trafficking
If a person is doing sex work under age 18, it is always considered sex trafficking
…but it’s not a young person’s fault for being in a situation like this!
It is the trafficker’s fault and a failure of society to protect that young person.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story
Frankie’s Story (1 of 8)
When I started 7th grade, all my friends were really into this new video game. We couldn’t afford the latest game console, but my cousin gave me his old one so at least I could play online with my friends. It’s more fun when you can chat live with your teammates, so even if my friends were busy, I would always find someone online to team up with.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story (2 of 8)
One night I started playing with this girl, and she told me her name was Emma. Turns out she’s in 8th grade and we have a lot in common. We played online more often, and eventually she asked to add me on social media. Then we started messaging throughout the day, and it started getting flirty. Talking with her had become the best part of my week.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story (3 of 8)
After school one day, I got a message from Emma that said “I have something special for you…” followed by a photo of her topless. I was surprised at first, but I guess that meant she was into me. She asked me to send one too, but I felt uncomfortable. What if my mom finds out? I told her that I can’t right now, and she was cool about it, but the next day she told me I owe her. I couldn’t think of another excuse, so I snapped a quick pic of my chest and sent it to her. I was nervous, but she told me I looked hot.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story (4 of 8)
We kept exchanging nude pics over the next few weeks and it became our little secret. Even though we hadn’t met in person yet, we decided to make things official. I told my friends about Emma, but not about the photos. I had never had a girlfriend before, and she made me feel so special. She even asked for my address so she could send me a gift – a brand new game console!
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story (5 of 8)
One morning, Emma mentioned that she had just bought herself a new phone. I asked her how she was buying all these expensive things, and she told me she had started selling her own nudes online to make some quick cash. She said she could help me out by selling some of my photos as well, but no one could find out. I needed the money, and I knew I could trust her, so I agreed.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story (6 of 8)
At first, it was great to have the extra cash. But then I started to notice that Emma was acting different. Her messages were shorter and less flirty, and she stopped logging on to the game as much. She only seemed to care about getting more photos to make more money. Eventually she even stopped sending me money and kept making excuses about it.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story (7 of 8)
Yesterday, the school counselor came in to talk to us about online safety. She mentioned how it’s not legal for people under 18 to be taking or sharing nude photos. I started wondering to myself what could happen if someone found out what Emma and I had been doing. Could I go to jail? I decided to tell Emma that I’m done selling photos.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story (8 of 8)
This morning I woke up to three messages from Emma demanding more photos ASAP. I couldn’t believe she was acting like this! I thought that I knew her and that she really cared about me. Her last message said that if don’t send her new pics today, she will expose all the photos I have sent. I’m so scared. She knows where I live. What should I do?
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Let’s Take a Moment to… breathe
Frankie’s Story
What are some of the “red flags” you noticed?
• Emma pressured Frankie to send nudes (child sexual abuse material)
• Emma paid Frankie for more photos (sex trafficking)
• Emma threatened to expose Frankie’s sexual images if they didn’t send more (sextortion)
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story
There were also some “pink flags”
– things that may seem normal but when mixed with
“red flags” become warning signs for harm or exploitation
• Frankie and Emma met online (no mutual friends)
• Frankie and Emma spent a lot of time messaging each other, eventually starting an “official” relationship (even though they never met in-person or even talked on the phone)
• Emma sent Frankie an expensive gift
• Emma had Frankie’s address
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Stages of Sex Trafficking
LURING GROOMING
ISOLATION EXPLOITATION MANIPULATION & COERCION
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story
What are the vulnerabilities Emma took advantage of?
• Frankie is young and quick to trust
• They were excited to be getting a girl’s attention and to start their first relationship
• They also want things (a new game console) that they can’t afford
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story
How could Frankie have used technology safer?
• Played online with friends they know in-person
• Not given their address to someone they met online
• Not shared nude photos
• Told a trusted adult when things started to make them uncomfortable
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Stay Aware Online…
Technology and social media are making it easier than ever for traffickers to target and connect with young people.
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story
Do you think Emma is who she says she is?
Meeting people online can be very risky
It’s easy for people to lie about their identity or pretend to be someone else
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Frankie’s Story
What could Frankie do next?
• Reach out to the Human Trafficking Hotline
• Talk with a friend or classmate and ask for help
• Tell a parent or another trusted adult about what is going on
• Contact the police and report Emma
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Let’s Take a Moment to…
breathe in breathe out
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Remember…
• We ALL have vulnerabilities
• Traffickers exploit vulnerabilities to gain power and control
• Everyone deserves safe relationships!
• It can be hard to leave a dangerous situation on our own reaching out to a hotline or trusted adult can help
Human Trafficking Hotline: Text ‘HELP’ to 233-733
Lesson 8 Wrap-Up
Let’s Review!
• What is CA’s affirmative consent standard?
• How is sexual violence a community issue?
• What resources can help people who are affected by sexual violence?
Looking Forward
Next class…
Relationships
(content warning)
• Explore signs of healthy and unhealthy relationships, including types of abuse
• Analyze and categorize relationship behaviors as healthy, unhealthy, or abusive
Self-Care Ideas: Practice some yoga poses Cuddle with a pet Write a poem or song
Do a random act of kindness