11/15/2023
Be FIRM
What Would You Say?
Reason why
y
Figure out your boundaries I don’t want to…
1
O nl
Make a suggestion
2
Scenario
Be FIRM
Figure out your boundaries I don’t want to…
ew
You are going on a date with someone for the first time. You decide to meet them at a pizza restaurant at 7pm. When you get there, you say “hi” and sit down across from them. They ask how you are doing and they say they have already put in an order for a large pepperoni pizza. You are a vegetarian.
Reason why
Make a suggestion
Use the Be FIRM model to address this situation.
4
vi
3
Example Response
Re
Example Response
5
“Thank you so much for ordering already. I am
“Thank you so much for ordering already. I am
a vegetarian. I don’t want to eat pepperoni
a vegetarian. I don’t want to eat pepperoni
because I was raised a vegetarian, so why
because I was raised a vegetarian, so why
don’t I ask the server if we can change our
don’t I ask the server if we can change our
pizza to be half pepperoni and half veggie?
pizza to be half pepperoni and half veggie?
That way we can both get what we want.”
That way we can both get what we want.”
6
1
11/15/2023
Example Response
Example Response “Thank you so much for ordering already. I am
a vegetarian. I don’t want to eat pepperoni
a vegetarian. I don’t want to eat pepperoni
because I was raised a vegetarian, so why
because I was raised a vegetarian, so why
y
“Thank you so much for ordering already. I am
don’t I ask the server if we can change our
pizza to be half pepperoni and half veggie?
That way we can both get what we want.”
That way we can both get what we want.”
7
O nl
don’t I ask the server if we can change our pizza to be half pepperoni and half veggie?
8
Example Response
Be FIRM
Figure out your boundaries I don’t want to…
“Thank you so much for ordering already. I am
ew
a vegetarian. I don’t want to eat pepperoni
because I was raised a vegetarian, so why
Reason why
don’t I ask the server if we can change our
pizza to be half pepperoni and half veggie?
Make a suggestion
That way we can both get what we want.”
10
Re
vi
9
2
11/15/2023
Relationship Spectrum
Abusive
y
Unhealthy
O nl
Healthy
Re
vi
ew
1
1