FabMag issue 03

FabMag uk

issue 03 / december 2020

Forty & beyond

YOU

are the star this christmas

Sparkling looks to sleigh this year! comfy christmas style tips Making christmas day clothing comfortable & cracking

Star Monroe

In midlife we RISE Why midlife really is the time of your life!

A message

From us

T

Zee, editor and founder of Forty and Beyond

his year, without a doubt, has been the strangest in our generations living memory. I often wonder what our grandparents would have made of it.

To the Women, who have been thrown into working from home, whilst trying to hold a house together and any sort of routine, we salute you.

To the woman battling health conditions and trying to stay positive over the lockdowns, we salute you.

To the women going through break ups, loss or grief during the lockdowns, we salute you.

To those of us still lurching from one day to the next in complete panic because we don’t know what’s going to be thrown at us next, we salute you.

But you know what? We made it! We made to the end of this Annus Horribilis God awful year. Yes we had a good summer (I can’t help thinking that’s only because all air traffic and road traffic all but ceased) and maybe we drank a bit more than we normally would. Maybe friendships were tested and

Alix, our editorial designer

relationships. But we are here, together. Well done!!

Now, put your feet up pour yourself a massive drink and enjoy Christmas however small or different it is, we made it and that’s something to celebrate.

Thank you so much for supporting us throughout the last few months. We hope to keep bringing you interesting, relevant and alternative viewpoints to ageing.

Alix and I would like to dedicate this issue to all those who lost their lives to Covid this year. We would like to pay thanks to our NHS, our Military and those healthcare workers who have worked tirelessly during the pandemic.

Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah.

Happy Diwali.

Keep safe.

See you in 2021

Zee & Alix

Forty & Beyond Magazine UK. December 2020 / issue 03

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Contents 20 6

contributors

Meet some of the special ladies who have helped us bring the magazing to life!

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FASHION feature

12

Comfty chistmas

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Keep Calm this Christmas

Sleigh your look this lockdown Christmas by editor, Zee Battersby

Cosy loungewear for all this season

Chalita Frost, mental health and wellbeing coach

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Confidence and me Chrissie Corner speaks to us about being confident in your own skin

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32 The Husbandless

wife at christmas

20 Sustainable

Winter fashion Rachel Peru shares her love of fashion & shopping more sustainably

25 STAR MONROE

The Mid Life Movement & being confident

28 Wheelie great Christmas!!

Siobhan Daniels talks about having Christmas on wheels 4

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Katy Thomas discusses christmas time without her husband

36 FAB MAGS GIFT GUIDE Supporting small independent shops this Christmas.

40 Loosing it

Helen Ponder -Diet-keeping on track this Christmas

42 CBD is it for you?

Learn about the health benefits of using CBD oil and the uses it can have

45 Gail Genster

Age is just a number – Knock out New Yorker

48 Sarah St Ledger

On beautiful brows, and no, not just for christmas!

50 Fa la la la la!!

Lara Fudge provides us with her playlist for a lockdown Christmas

52 young at heart

Lynne Coates reveals her secret to staying young and coping with a milestone birthday in lockdown December 2020 / issue 03

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Contributors

The faces behind the words....

FabMag

uk

fortyandbeyondmaguk @gmail.com

Our team w

EDITOR Zena Battersby Designer Alix Pamela Shaw

Star Monroe

Katy Thomas Our favourite christmas song this month:

Zee Battersby

Sarah Sandison

Chalita Frost

Gail Genster

OPS & OPS Chrissie Corner

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Lara Fudge

Rachel Peru

Lynn Coates

Siobhan Daniels

Helen Ponder

Zee: My fave Christmas song is- if we’re singing it... ‘little donkey’ as it reminds me of being very small and singing it at school!

If we’re going to say chart songs then mine is ‘Stop the Cavalry’ by Jona lewie. It’s just a lovely song and not an assault on all your senses!

Alix: ‘Fairytale of New York’ for nostalgic reasons.

It was my grandads favourite christmas song and reminds me of him & our happy family christmas times everytime I hear it.

Fabmag UK is a registered trademark and an online publication.

Reproduction in whole or in any part is strictly forbidden without written permission from the Editor, Zena Battersby.

The views expressed in the magazine are not neccessarily those of the editor.

All images used are copyright to the photographers, who have been credited throughout the magazine.

December 2020 / issue 03

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Sleigh your look this lockdown christmas

LOVE YOUR SKIN, REDEFINE HOW IT AGES

By: zee battersby

BREAKTHROUGH INNOVATION to help rejuvenate, restore and rebalance skin affected by menopause

Before

After 8 Weeks

Donald Stanley Christmas Collection from £200.00 4

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VISIBLE IMPROVEMENT WITHIN 8 WEEKS OF USE.

December 2020 / issue 03 0000387

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W

ho doesn’t love to get their glad rags on? I for one LOVE the opportunity to get dressed up. This year has really been one of the strangest and most challenging for a number of reasons, not least it’s been the absence of a good night out with your friends. I’ve worked in a friends Gastro pub on and off this year and the addition of early closing really was an eye opener.

Instead of the men being told off, it was the women! Rose Wine is definitely the female version of Stella I can tell you! On reflection it just Showed how much we all value time with our friends (and rose wine!) What with being forced

Dress Donald Stanley, Shoes ASOS Earrings Oliva Devine 10

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Dress Donald Stanely shoes DUNE and jewellery from Olivia Devine

Donald Stanley Christmas Collection from £200.00 to share your home with every single member of your family AND trying to home school children or grandchildren, you will definitely need some sparkle. Or maybe like me if you spent one lockdown with your family and the second one on your own...you need a bit of a lift.

I think that we should really go for it this Christmas party season!!

We should get dressed up and really feel like the absolute stars that we are. Whether you are having a zoom party or you are in tier 1 and able to get out for a few hours to see your friends I’ve got some sparkle for you right here.

I’ve had a lot of fun collating this collection of fabulous party outfits for all shapes and sizes. I hope we all get to see our friends

Jumpsuit Nancy Mac £199.00 shoes ZARA broach and earrings from Olivia Devine

this season and have a good night out. It’s certainly been missed. So, enjoy yourselves be safe and let’s kick a new one in 2021!!! So here is some inspiration along with my favourite make up and lash brands to give you the finished look.

Now get those disco slippers out and party!!!!!!! w Happy party season love Zee xx December 2020 / issue 03

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comfy christmas

Sequin top and trousers from ZARA Top £39.00 and trousers £49.00 Gold Leather Slippers from Amazon

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n an ideal world I probably wouldn’t change out of my pyjamas on Christmas Day this year!! My Husband is in the Military and deployed until April 2021. I’m hoping that by the time Christmas arrives I will be out of my mood and feeling a bit more festive. That said, the last month or so we have been in lockdown, I like many have been totally embracing the lockdown uniform of lounge wear (see best pyjamas) so its been very easy to slip into the most casual of attitudes.

I thought about it and I’ve decided turning up at my daughter and son in laws this Christmas looking like the Dad from BBC’s 80’s comedy ‘Bread’ isn’t an option. It seems the more time I spend at home the more homeless I look!

So here is a little bit of a push if like me you really aren’t feeling that great about the ‘DAY’ and all that comes with it. For whatever reason, you are not on your own and I’m totally on board the ‘this year will be a bit of a struggle’ bus…DING DING ALL ABOARD!! w

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Lounge set from LUXE lounge £25.00 slippers Zara £26.00

Boux avenue £28.00 set

Molten Luxe Baked Palette £29.95 Miicosmetics

Jimmy choo £245.00

Light Loving Intensity Highlighter £16.95 Miicosmetics

Lounge set from luxe lounge £28.00 slippers from pretty you £26.00 December 2020 / issue 03

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GIFT MORE. SPEND LESS.

Purchase a £20 Gift Card and get £30 Purchase a £30 Gift Card and get £50

Share the love (and expense) this Christmas with the My Perfect Cosmetics pioneering value upgrade Gift Cards.

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fter a year no one could have imagined, make someone’s Christmas by giving a gift that allows them to treat themselves to our award-winning skincare and cosmetics range.

New brand Discovery Explore their complete age correction range from My Perfect Cosmetics Company, with a mix of long term treatments we know and love (Creams, washes, oils and serums) mixed with the instant

fixes you probably don’t know about – Facial and eyes.

Try yourself or gift Big, pay small with this innovative gift card idea – treat yourself or treat a loved one this Christmas. w www.myperfectcosmeticscompany.co.uk/unlock

Purchase your gift card today

www.myperfectcosmeticscompany.co.uk/unlock

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‘Tisthe season to be jolly...

So here’s some suggestions that may assist you to combat the potential rising levels of stress and anxiety:

Photo:burst.shopify.com/@sarahpflugphoto

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“It’s imperative to do what feels right for you” create the perfect day and commit to all manner of things can become hugely overwhelming.

Busy schedules, overindulging, overspending, social engagements, family conflict and missing loved ones can cause much angst and

sometimes lead to a sense of isolation and despair. Quite the opposite of what we have been taught to believe it should be.

But here is something to consider; it doesn’t have to be this way! It’s imperative to do what feels right for you and not to feel obliged to commit to anything that causes you anxiety.

Give yourself permission to make choices that create a more stress free Christmas, this year and for all the years to come!

Photo:burst.shopify.com/davesalter

ertainly within my lifetime, the Christmas period has been portrayed as a time to celebrate the joyous festivities it is supposed to bring. A season filled with copious amounts of food and drink and presents, particularly enjoyed with your nearest and dearest.

However, in reality for many, this just isn’t realistic or achievable.

Christmas can be a time of increased stress and anxiety, whereby mounting pressure to

Don’t over indulge If you’re usually left feeling low after a seasonal food and drink splurge, choose not to do it this year. It’s important to recognise the impact that food has on our mood and emotions, so make healthier choices, limit alcohol and stay active.

Self-care is needed throughout all of the year, so continue to practise self-love for your body and mind!

Photo:burst.shopify.com/matthew_henry

By: Chalita Frost

Preparation is key Write lists and adhere to them rigidly.

Plan ahead and give yourself as much time as possible to achieve what is needed, without leaving everything until the last minute.

If finances are an issue, be realistic with your budget and make a conscious choice not to get into debt, be honest and ask yourself do you really need to spend that amount?

Consider doing things differently With the current situation, it appears that some of the usual social and family gatherings will be affected and may mean that it’s time to shake up the traditions.

Use this time to create the greatest possible outcome for you. This could also diminish the additional financial implications of buying new outfits and providing food for the masses!

If you’re feeling fretful that the big day won’t be the same, remind yourself that change is okay and it’s not permanent.

Make time and space for yourself Remember to invest in you.

Listen to what your mind and body needs.

Some people find winter hard going, so commit to doing at least one thing a day that makes your

soul happy.

15 minutes of mindfulness every day can help you to remain calm, relaxed and grounded.

Choose meditation, yoga, reading, an inspirational podcast or even a wintry walk in the woods to lift your mood and balance your emotions.

Enjoy The pressure to get everything perfect for the big day can be immense. And please note here: it’s just one day!

Do what you can to focus on what’s really important to you. Be kind and gentle with yourself if you feel emotional, manage your expectations, seek support from loved ones and take some time to rest and self-reflect.

Our reality of Christmas can be exceptionally different to what we see on TV or social media and that’s okay! That’s real life. w December 2020 / issue 03

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content and memes about pre and post lockdown bodies were also circulated during lockdown making us feel guilty and ashamed for gaining weight.

Now we are coming out of the second lockdown it is important to know exactly how to cope with body confidence issues and insecurities.

“eat what you want, wear what you want and love and celebrate your body whatever it looks like”

1. Avoid sharing and viewing COVID 19 weight shaming memes. It stigmatises larger bodies and may trigger negative thoughts about your body.

2. Stop comparing yourself with others on social media. Diversify the accounts that you follow so that your feed contains a wide variety of body types and messages that promote self acceptance and body positivity.

3. Accept that it’s natural for our bodies to change throughout different stages in our life. Embrace what you have.

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fter the unusual year that we’ve had Christmas 2020 for many will be a chance to enjoy merriment, Christmas food and time off work. However, amongst the festivities there can be too many challenges for those on a body acceptance path.

Earlier in the year during Lockdown 1 the message of “bettering” ourselves was very persistent and our social media was saturated with diet and fitness advice for the “ideal body”.

Covid related fat phobic

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How to love your Body During the festive season & Beyond By: Chrissie Bray

4. Appreciate what your body can do instead of focusing on what it looks like. Celebrate wins! If you ran 5k without catching the bus home congratulate yourself!

If you can paint your own toenails celebrate that flexibility too!

5. Stop giving food a moral value!

Food is food and shouldn’t be labelled as bad or good. Christmas is a time for indulging! Enjoy the festivities! You are not a bad person for eating more at Christmas; you are a normal person enjoying the festivities!

2020 has not been the year that anyone could have predicted so if you made it to December eat what you want, wear what you want and love and celebrate your body whatever it looks like and however well or not it functions. w December 2020 / issue 03

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sustainable winter fashion By: Rachel Peru

Puff sleeved chiffon dress - @H&M Biker boots - last year’s @missguided Vintage leather coat, hat and necklace @myvintagebeau

I

have always loved vintage fashion and shopping in charity shops. That moment when you find a really special item that you would never find on the high street. It’s the thrill of the chase and the romance of wondering who else has worn it and what their story was.

Wearing an outfit that helps you stand out in the crowd and expresses your personality can be so much fun.

I’m equally aware as a size 14-16 that shopping for vintage can be a real challenge if you are a bigger size as women were so much smaller in previous decades.

That is why you’ll find a mixture of vintage and retro style clothes in my wardrobe. The nod to the 70’s is still going strong this Autumn and Winter, so I’ve been making the most of the beautiful Yorkshire countryside to show you more.

It was also a good excuse to work with a great team who are trying to stay positive, like most self-employed creatives during this difficult time.

I talk to lots of women that still feel intimidated by shopping for vintage and I completely get how seeing rails and rails of clothes from different eras can be a bit overwhelming. If that’s the case,

“the romance of wondering who else has worn it and what their story was”

I used to avoid wearing maxi dresses, but I’ve been converted, I love this Floral maxi from H&M which works so well with biker boots and a vintage 1970’s leather coat.

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Where would a 1970’s wardrobe be without corduroy! I love the colours of Autumn in fashion and mixing Mustard and Burgundy is one of my favourite combinations. If the Red leather jacket had been a couple of inches bigger this one would have been coming home with me!

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Top @Primark Tunic @H&M Cords @Collectifclothing Crochet waistcoat & Shawl @ Myvintagebeau

I’m sure I’m not the only one that has hardly worn their Summer clothes this year so I’m trying to create new looks to get the most out of my wardrobe. This year has made me more determined to make my wardrobe more sustainable and I’ve reduced the amount of ‘new’ clothes I purchase dramatically. Adding a waistcoat and accessories can really make a difference. Although wearing white isn’t for the faint-hearted, layering it up makes it a little less scary. It would look great with an oversized chunky cardigan and walking boots too.

Dress - @H&M. Waistcoat, Belt and Scarf @Myvintagebeau

start with accessories and build it up over time.

I used to have my own vintage clothing business called All About Eve and I really miss the buzz of working at 22

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“I used to have my own vintage clothing business called All About. Eve and I really miss the buzz of working at vintage fairs”

Shirt, Jumper, Leather coat @ Myvintagebeau Hat and trousers @H&M Vintage wellington bootsModels own

vintage fairs and all the interesting people you meet, but now I get to be on the other side as a shopper.

I can’t wait until we can get back to ‘normal’ and vintage fairs

can happen again but there’s been some fun virtual events popping up this year instead.

I’m a big fan of the @the_ vintage_coperative_ virtual fairs. w Thank you to Photographer Adrian

McFade @ade_mcfade, Trudy Fielding @myvintagebeau @trudybeaustylist and Brittany Jae @brittanyjae_makeup, for collaborating on this shoot.

Rachel Peru @rachelperu1 www. outofthebubblepocast.com December 2020 / issue 03

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MIDLIFE & proud By: star monroe

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idlife is a minefield, full of out-dated how-to’s on how you should be moving through this stage of your life. And if you don’t question all of this nonsense it will pull you in and drag you down with it.

Hey there, I’m Star Monroe and am a proud midlife woman who has taken life by the reins and is living life on her own terms. Life is too short to be worried about the size of my waist, fat rolls, wrinkles, people pleasing and trying to do ALL the bloody things absolutely perfectly. I’m here to embrace life by the mammaries and more importantly, I’m here to teach women to do the same.

Midlife is not a time to shrink and hide or to believe this is your lot. It is a time of great transformation, personal growth and the chance to unhook yourself from what everyone else wants for you and to dive into what you really want for yourself.

Just take a moment and ask yourself “what do I want?”

This is one the most powerful questions a woman can ask herself. Because when women are aligned and living out their truth, when women are saying YES to opportunities and people who light her up and saying NO to anything which drags her down, that is when women WAKE UP and get to live a life they absolutely adore.

And YOU deserve to live a life you adore.

Midlife is the time for you to

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“Midlife is the time to put yourself first, it’s time to do the inner work, and ditch all that no longer serves you, so you can reclaim your power and reclaim, reinvent you” create a beautiful relationship with your body, figure out what really nourishes you, to access and weave in way more pleasure and to amp up what turns you on.

Low libido, feeling dull, zero mojo be gone!

I am here to tell you, when you

step into your power, when you say YES to yourself and your desires, your inner flame will ignite and your life force will return at full force. The world needs you turned on with life and the world needs YOU saying YES to yourself!

So, who the hell am I?

Well my professional titles are expert psychotherapist/life coach, eating psychology coach, relationship therapist and body psychotherapist. I bring a lot of skills to the table. I have worked with women for over 30 years and have created six successful businesses (and a couple of unsuccessful ones too) .

But way more than all of this I’ve been through hell and back; severe body hate, numerous eating disorders, cocaine addiction, alcoholism, domestic abuse, codependency, bankruptcy and I’m proud to declare I am out the other

Just take a moment and ask yourself “what do I want?”

coulds and would haves!

If you want to live a life that excites you, that tempts you, that makes you feel gloriously happy (and this is completely available for you) you gotta shake off the self doubt, dust yourself down, remember who you are and get ready for the TIME OF YOUR LIFE. Midlife is the time to put yourself first, it’s time to do the inner work, and ditch all that no longer serves you, so you can reclaim your power and reclaim, reinvent you. No one is coming to save you, you are going to have to save yourself. And between you and I, you deserve to live a life that lights you up, you deserve to wear clothes that make you happy, you deserve to live out your deepest desires, you deserve to be surrounded by people who elevate you and you deserve to feel alive, sexy and radiant in midlife and beyond.

In midlife, we RISE. w www.msstarmonroe.com

side and flamboyantly living a life that turns me on. Oh, and did I mention I’m a retired showgirl too!

As you move through midlife things WILL change; relationships, your body, the way you think, responsibilities. And it’s so easy for you to become lost in all these changes and those pesky shoulds, December 2020 / issue 03

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Wheelie great Christmas!!

C

By: sIOBHAN DANIELS

photo: burst.shopify.com/photos

hristmas this year is going be so different for many people because of COVID. As families are trying to get their heads around having smaller Christmas gatherings because the government has determined six is the maximum number, I am getting ready to do Christmas for ONE this year in my motorhome and getting back to the simple roots of Christmas, I will be staying in a beautiful place on the North Norfolk coast.

Waking up early to watch the sunrise will kick of christmas morning

“Most of the decorations have sentimental memories for both me and my daughter” Traditionally my Christmas’s have been spent with my daughter Samantha and other family and friends. I have always decorated my flat and put up a real Christmas tree that made everyone laugh because it was so eclectic and adorned with all manner of decorations, from a Christmas carrot to a fluffy handbag. Most of 28

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Siobhans eclectic christmas tree

the decorations have sentimental memories for both me and my daughter so they all got thrown on the tree. And we have always put a penguin on the top instead of a fairy.

Throughout the years over the festive period I invited scores of people round to eat, drink and play lots of party games, the highlight being the “poo the potato in the bucket game! That is when you

have two relay teams competing, one person on each team runs to a pink love heart shaped bucket at one end of the room, holding a potato between their knees, before turning around and dropping the potato into the bucket. This was usually done after a few drinks and was hilarious.

I admit I will miss all that but I am also excited about my alternative motorhome Christmas.

It could not be more different but I am determined that it will still feel Christmassy and I will be happy in my lovely little home.

One of the reasons I am travelling around Great Britain, Covid permitting, is to show that we can live with so much less “stuff” than we actually think we need

to make us happy. Keeping it simple often gives more joy than too many trappings. Saying that I have got some decorations to make

“I know I will wake up early on Christmas Day to run outside and watch the sunrise” sure the motorhome feels more festive,including strings of fairy lights and candles, which I will be careful with when lighting them in the motorhome. I am also hoping to find a tiny real Christmas tree

because I just love the smell from a real tree and I can imagine when I step into the motorhome after a walk or bike ride and see the tree all lit up, it will fill my heart with joy.

In the run up to Christmas I will be playing all the old traditional Christmas tunes to fill the motorhome with the Christmas spirit. And I will post off my small presents and cards to family. They will send mine to the address of where I am staying, so I will be able to put them under my tree to open on Christmas Day. Even though I will be on my own on Christmas Eve I will make myself some mulled wine and have home made mince pies and of course I will leave some out for 4 December 2020 / issue 03

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Santa and a carrot for Rudolf and hang up a little stocking.

I know I will wake up early on Christmas Day to run outside and watch the sunrise, as this always makes me feel so happy to face the day. Then I will open some bubbly and have smoked salmon and scrambled egg for breakfast, before lounging about in my Christmas pyjamas and FaceTimeing my daughter Samantha and her boyfriend Scotty and their little sausage dog Frank ,who no doubt will be wearing his Christmas outfit, which is always so funny, last year he was a sprout. Not to be outdone I will eventually put my Christmas jumper on, which has a gorgeous Robin on the front, and my Christmas earrings. Thanks to the beauty of FaceTime and WhatsApp calls I will continue to chat throughout the day with more family and friends.

Weeks before I will have made sure that I will have plenty of gas in my gas cylinders so that I can make myself a traditional Christmas dinner in the comfort of my own van, in my lovely little oven. Obviously I won’t need a full Turkey but a Turkey breast with all the trimmings will be just the job and no-one would know the difference. I have already got my mini Christmas pudding, which I love with just plain white sauce, something that always reminds me of my mother who made the most wonderful Christmas dinners when I was a child.

I am lucky that I will be parked 8

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Siobhan in her christmas robin jumper

up not be too far from the sea, so when I have had my Christmas dinner I am going to wrap up warm and have a lovely walk, whatever the weather, to the beach and enjoy walking along the waters edge listening to the waves crashing onto the sand. That to me will be a magical Christmas. I will enjoy the calm and feel that I have truly escaped the stresses of Christmas and given myself time to reflect on my life and what I am doing in

my retirement, challenging ageism and ageist stereotypes and trying to inspire other women to seek out adventure in a very difficult time.

But there is still one thing I know I will miss more than anything ‌...the Christmas hugs with loved ones. w Follow my motorhome madness shuvonshuvoff.blogspot.com Instagram;shuvonshuvoff Twitter:siobhandaniels Linkedin:siobhandaniels December 2020 / issue 03

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The

‘ C Word’ Christmas, not cancer By: katy thomas

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work in a school and live in a town that hosts a huge Christmas market in November, it’s impossible not to acknowledge that the festive season is just around the corner. Dom was a big fan of Christmas and enjoyed all the celebrations that go with it. When the girls were little he would take great delight in stamping his muddy work boots through the house in the style of Father Christmas (while I followed behind him sprinkling glitter.....spending the next twelve months getting rid of the bastard stuff) He would dutifully eat half of the mince pie that was left out for Father Christmas and the glass of milk.... well, that got poured back into the 4 pinter in the fridge. He insisted

we wrapped all the presents on Christmas Eve, wnever before.

It was always a big family affair.

The only Christmas we ever had on our own was in 1996, I was 6 days overdue with our first baby and it was our first Christmas living together in our tiny flat.

She didn’t arrive on Christmas Day, she made us wait until 29th December, she was well cooked like the turkey!

Dom loved cooking, him and my sister were always in charge of the kitchen on Christmas day and the rest of us were banned.

We were given menial jobs like putting batteries in the kids toys or topping up the Prosecco. In actual fact this always suited me very well. My job was in the preparation, so on Christmas day

“Dom was a big fan of Christmas and enjoyed all the celebrations that go with it.”

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Photo by:burst.shopify.com/Matthew Henry

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“We all are aware that a huge part of our family is missing on Christmas Day, like every other day but his presence is always felt. ” topped up!

I actually don’t dread Christmas. It’s happening and it’s hard to avoid so I choose to embrace it. We all are aware that a huge part of our family is missing on Christmas Day, like every other day but his presence is always felt. We talk about Dom so much, it’s like he’s with us. Even the Christmas he was diagnosed, Dom insisted we packed up the car on Christmas Eve and we headed to my sisters in Surrey as

planned. Dom’s sister joined us on Christmas morning. We somehow managed to get through that period together with the dreadful news we were all still trying to process hanging over us like a dark cloud. It was surreal but we went through the motions and somehow managed to ride those huge waves of utter terror at what was to come.

Dom started chemotherapy the first week in January. What happened over the next few

Photos by:burst.shopify.com/Matthew Henry

Photo by:burst.shopify.com/ Sarah Pflug

itself I happily milled around drinking bucks fizz in a sparkly jumper, admiring the teamwork of the two chefs. They worked so well together and made it look so easy.

I’ve since tried helping my sister with the Christmas dinner and she kindly refrained from getting irritated with me as I got in her way. Instead, she patiently guided me through step by step on how to make the sauce for her famous cauliflower and broccoli cheese.

I think she was beyond relieved when my brother and sister in law came back from Canada last year. My brother is a much better commis chef than me, in fact he’s a brilliant cook too (they get it from my Mum) and my sister in law is the master at keeping the drinks

months was nothing short of a miracle to us. Dom was found to be HER2 positive (a scientific way of saying he had a cancer gene mutation) and so was able to be moved on to a different treatment, Herceptin. This was the greatest gift and we never took for granted the fact that we are more fortunate than most that he was able to have access to this “wonder drug”.

Thanks to the amazing response Dom had to Herceptin, for the next two years (which the statistics said we shouldn’t have had) normal Christmas Day service resumed. The dream team were back in full effect. Dom responded so well to treatment that most people outside of our family or close friends forgot he had cancer or thought he was in remission.

Dom was very clear that he didn’t want cancer to be given any more of his time or energy than it

absolutely demanded. Of course his illness impacted on our lives but it never dictated how we lived.

There is no advice I can give to anyone experiencing grief on getting through Christmas. It’s so personal. Some people cannot face the celebrations, some take themselves away, some embrace it the best they can and ride the

“Getting through every day can a struggle when you are missing someone special to you,this is magnified at Christmas”

waves of sadness throughout the festive season. There is no right or wrong way to approach it.

Getting through every day can be a struggle when you are missing someone special to you, this is magnified at Christmas.

For a number of reasons, this year, we are choosing to do it differently. We are opting for a Christmas buffet, drinks and a houseful of family. That way everyone gets to enjoy the day. I will be woken up by my niece and nephew at the crack of dawn, we will eat Quality Street for breakfast while we unwrap our stockings with Mariah Carey reminding us of what we really want for Christmas. I’ll put on my sparkly jumper, pour a Buck’s Fizz and I will carry with me the sadness that this will be the third Christmas without my love. w Read Katy's blog over at www. www. husbandlesswife.com December 2020 / issue 03

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FABMAGS

GIFT GUIDE

Supporting small independents this Christmas

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1.Newa anti-ageing device. Prices from £249.00 www.newabeauty.co.uk 2. Moon & stars face mask. Prices from £22.00 www.marybenson.london 3.My perfect eyes cream. Prices from £29.00 www.myperfectcosmeticscompany.co.uk 4.Lux Lashes. Prices from £7.99 via Lux-Lashes London app free on appstore 5.Booby pots. Prices from £18.00 www.instagram.com/woody_and_wool 36

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6. Bubblegum vases. Prices from£10.00 instagram.com/el.cetera 7. Earrings. Prices from £10.00 www.gangsterwraps.co.uk 8. Personalised illustration. Prices from £15.00 www.helenhird.co.uk 9. Boobie Pot. From £15.00 www.etsy.com/uk/shop/TheBoobPotCompany 10. Bracelet. Prices from £11.00 withlovejewelleryuk.com December 2020 / issue 03

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11. Slogan tee. Prices from £10.00 www.lovemedoclothing.co.uk 12. Bottle bar shop. Prices from £17.00 each www.bottlebarandshop.com 13. lambswool hot water bottles. Prices from £20.00 www.curious-rose.co.uk 14. Embroidered brooches. Prices from £12.00 www.jackandfreda.com 15. Highlighter. Mii makeup. Prices from £7.99 www.miicosmetics.com 38

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16. Rainbow scarf. Pieces start at £8.00 www.riotlounge.co.uk 17. Graffiti sweatshirt. £35.00 mucknbrass.com 18. Silver bag. Prices start at £30.00 www.stripygiraffe.co.uk 19. Charm necklace. Prices from £20.00 saywhatyouc.com 20. Girls print. Prices from £11.00 www.etsy.com/uk/shop/HotFoils December 2020 / issue 03

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Gingerbread

kisses

& Christmas wishes By: Helen Ponder

photos: burst.shopify.com/photos

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ll the lovely traditions that we all have make this time of year so, special family, friends and of course food oh and maybe the odd tipple of your choice or my case the odd chunk of marzipan!!

One of my favourite days is Christmas Eve when I prepare, cook and bake all the usual goodies whist listening to Michael Bublè.

The house always smells amazing and it’s that feeling that the magic of the big day is coming! Glass of something bubbly...oh go on then it is Christmas!

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year” Roast turkey, goose fat potatoes, bread sauce, pigs in blankets, stuffing, gravy not to mention the Christmas pudding these are all at the top of my list!! This year after making the decision to go back to Slimming World I’m going to take it a little easier...Although a mini cheese board has been ordered but that will be my one vice!! Surely if I serve it with apple, celery, grapes and figs these would count towards my five a day?

I will make sure that I don’t undo all of my hard work (will report this back in the next issue) Is that extra of crumble of Stilton, drop of port or that extra dollop of brandy butter really worth it?

Don’t get me wrong I’m not going to be an angel and after the year we have all had this is certainly the time to celebrate with our loved ones, be festive and enjoy all our little traditions.

“Is that extra of crumble of Stilton, drop of port or that extra dollop of brandy butter really worth it? ” I’ve lost over a stone and I’m off to buy some lounge wear for Christmas Day (Zee may need your help) yes it’s a size or two smaller...yay!! One thing I do know is this year I have aimed for the Christmas cracker and not so

much a Christmas pudding!

Have a great Christmas, be grateful, be thankful and be kind!

Enjoy some much needed time to be merry! Here is to a happy and healthy 2021! w Love Helen x December 2020 / issue 03

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Let’s debunk the myths about CBD By: Sarah Sandison

Photo:burst.shopify.com/Nicole De Khors

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insomnia and chronic pain. I use @Planthaya (on Instagram) because they use only sunshine grown Hemp (meaning no greenhouses or lights) and always from the same farm. They have full control over their product from seed to bottle. All of their products are 3rd party lab tested and come with a Certificate of Analysis. This ensures that the CBD content on the label is exactly the content you’re getting in the bottle. @Planthaya currently have only 3 products, making it super easy to cut out the noise and the nonsense.

’ve been using CBD in different forms for over 12 months. It curbs my anxiety, helps me focus, assists my sleep, improves my skin, muscle aches, period pains and I believe it improves my over all health. I could go on... So I will!

CBD is most commonly used to treat anxiety and insomnia, but the strongest scientific evidence is for its effectiveness in treating some of the cruellest childhood epilepsy syndromes. (Harvard Health Publishing 2020) But its a confusing market! I was introduced to CBD by a friend so I was turned on to it pretty easily.

But when my first bottle of drops ran out and I searched online for a replacement I was super confused.

So many brands, so many forms, so many dosages! Its like shopping for foundation without an experienced brand rep to assist you… almost impossible!

So, what’s important?

Ingredients, dosage and

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transparency. You need to know what’s in it and where it comes from. But first things first, lets get you the answers to the most common questions about CBD. What is CBD? CBD, otherwise known as Cannabidiol, is a natural chemical compound that comes from the Hemp plant. CBD is one of over 85 compounds found in Hemp, known as cannabinoids.

“They sell CBD in Selfridges, that’s how legal it is!”

Can CBD get me high?

No, the CBD I use is derived from EU regulated Hemp and contains below 0.2% THC (the main psychoactive compound in Marijuana that gives you the “high” sensation.)

Balance Drops (1000mg per bottle) I take this if I need a quick hit.

Hold a few drops under your tongue and the tissues defuse the CBD straight into your blood.

Is CBD legal?

Yes. In the UK CBD is not illegal as longs it contains only trace amounts of THC. Which is why the products I use will never contain more than 0.2% THC. They sell CBD in Selfridges, that’s how legal it is!

Is CBD safe?

Yes, CBD is safe and non-toxic for humans even in high amounts and after continuous use. CBD is harmless and can be used by anyone (even kids and dogs) because its non-psychotropic,

unlike THC, and has minimal side effects. Noted infrequent side effects can include diarrhoea and some fatigue. Personally, I can experience both of these daily, with or without using CBD. Is there a recommended dose?

The company that I trust and use, currently have 3 products and each comes with its own recommended dosage. All of them are safe enough for you to use your own trial and error, to find the dosage that works for you.

How do you take CBD? Hemp derived CBD comes in many forms and can be taken orally in drops you put under your tongue, vegan capsules (my favourite) or applied topically in the form of a balm.

Who can I trust?

Some CBD manufactures have come under scrutiny for wild, indefensible claims such as “CBD is a cure for all cancers” which it is not. More research is required.

But CBD is proven to help anxiety,

Boost capsules - 5mg in each vegan capsule (500mg per bottle) My personal favourite. I take one every day and two if I’m super anxious. They work a treat for me personally and I recommend them to everyone.

Soothe - lavender and beeswax balm (500mg per jar) I use this as lip balm, but also on any dry skin in winter and on my shoulders for deep tissue pain.

If you’re looking to try it message Stacey on the Planthya Instagram page.

Have a peaceful and sleep filled week. w December 2020 / issue 03

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find @mygangsterwraps over on instagram!

beautiful brows... not just for christmas!

By: Sarah st ledger

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December 2020 / issue 03

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ince I started my career in the Beauty Industry 15 years ago Permanent Make Up has always been on my to do list to train in and back in 2012 that’s exactly what I did with Permanent Make Up specialists Natural Enhancement.

A lot of clients I speak to think this is a relatively new treatment within our industry however its been around for decades.

How many people do you know that have over plucked their Eyebrows (when it was all the rage in the 60’s,) have Eyebrows that have gone sparse over the years or unfortunately lost them due to a medical condition or cancer?

Permanent Eyebrows can shape,

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“Permanent Eyebrows can shape, define and refine not only your Eyebrows but your whole facial look.Whether this be a structured hairstroke brow or a powdered brow for a softer finish” define and refine not only your Eyebrows but your whole facial look. Whether this be a structured hair stroke brow or a powdered brow for a softer finish.

Permanent Eyeliner is another option and whether you desire a single or double liner, your eyes can be beautifully, big and defined all

the time. Its a fantastic treatment that saves both time and effort in your day-to-day life.

Gorgeous Permanent Lip Liner and Lip Blush gives you an illusion of fuller lips for longer, creating stunning definition and a covetable cupids bow. The Blush option gives the same effect as Liner but with a softer more natural appearance by blending the colour from the liner, into the contours of the lips for that perfectly pinched pout!

Whether its Angelina Jolie, Sarah Jessica Parker, Mariah Carey or the wonderfully stunning icon Marilyn Monroe that renders the Beauty Spot envy in us, we all know that we secretly wish for one and these are becoming increasingly popular within the Permanent Make Up world!

Prior to the treatment clients are required to perform a patch test and fill in the relevant consultation forms which will be checked on the day of the treatment by myself.

The treatments itself takes around 2 hours starting with a discussion together about colour selection, we would then move on to pre drawing and measuring.

Once you are happy with the colour selection and mapping we would the go ahead with the tattooing itself.

Full aftercare advise is given and after your initial treatment a touch up is booked for 4 to 6 weeks later to make sure the Permanent Make Up has healed well and see if any adjustments are needed.

To keep your Permanent Make Up looking fresh I recommend my clients to have a colour boost every 12 to 18 months. w Sarah xxx December 2020 / issue 03

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Age

is just a number By: Gail Genster “We are what we repeatedly do.

Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit.”

I love quotes. Some people simply appreciate them, but I make a conscious effort to embrace them and try to live my life in a fashion often inspired by them. The quote above, which is derived from an interpretation of Aristotle by contemporary philosopher Will Durant, is one of my favourites, as it is directly related to one of the most significant aspects of my life.

Athletics.

My passion for physical activity began in my childhood, as I was an active participant in

tennis, volleyball, and tether ball.

I did not realize it at the time, but retrospectively, I see that these sports had one common denominator: they are hands-on activities. They all incorporate the 48

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lower body, sure. But the defining characteristics of these sports are upper body strength and hands-on exertion.

It was no wonder, then, that when I took my first boxing class

in 1999, I was hooked. It was a remarkable experience to find a sport so similar to those of my youth in terms of physicality, where I got to use my upper body strength to succeed. This time, however, the activity itself was more empowering. As I triumphantly wiped the sweat from my face after my very first boxing session, I knew I had found my next passion in the world of athletics.

With the unique empowerment of that first boxing class still freshly imprinted on my mind, body, and soul, I promptly joined a local boxing gym immediately after it opened in my area. With every jab and cross, I built upon my foundation of skills that had been developed during my childhood. It was intoxicating.

I was further elated when I got the chance to become the owner of this same gym. This gave me the opportunity to blend two major versions of myself: businesswoman and athlete. The boxing gym had long been my happy place, and now I owned that happy place. It was too good of an opportunity

“I knew I had found my next passion in the world of athletics. ” to pass up.

My mission was and is to give others the same feeling of power and satisfaction I feel whenever I box. At 55, I started teaching boxing classes to inspire others, of any age, to pursue this exhilarating exercise and never stop improving at it. Age is just a number in the boxing ring; the sport itself is something we always have an opportunity to improve at.

As the aforementioned quote states, “excellence is not an act, but a habit.” I am now 59 years young and have continued to

pound that heavy bag with the same vigour as ever. We can never reach perfection. However, if we put forth the necessary effort day in and day out, we can create that habit of excellence.

Boxing serves as a microcosm of this concept for me; if I do everything in my power to improve whenever I lace up those gloves, I will reach every one of the goals I set for myself. That is the habit I will continue to develop, regardless of how old (young) I am.

In the end, age is just a number. w December 2020 / issue 03

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playlists for a lockdown Christmas By: Lara fudge

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Photo:burst.shopify.com/Nicole De Khors

ith a world full of people set to shuffle mode, when was the last time you listened to an album from start to finish?

If you are like me, I love to hear an album from start to finish as I believe it tells us a beautiful story, sometimes with a hidden message that we never understand. I love listening to my music on vinyl as it sounds so much more appealing and you guarantee to listen

to the whole album.

I wanted to share with you my top five lockdown albums. My album choices have had a huge part to play throughout my waves of emotions along with some amazing moments of dancing in my kitchen with my adorable children and some extremely sad days where these songs have helped me get out of bed and function. I think you will love them as much as I do, if not you already do and play them just as much as me.

The Fifth Dandelion (2020) Paul Molloy This album has lifted my spirits with the incredible melodic and vintage sounds. The lyrics are creative and the whole album is a fantastic story. My favourite track is “My Madonna” as this represents his feeling towards his girlfriend when they first started going out. It is just stunning.

Pocket Melodies (2020) The Moons What a beautiful irresistible album I adore the cute, gleeful vibes from each song. I think the album is the perfect choice for anyone relaxing at home. My favourite track is “Perfect Man”. I can not get it off repeat lately so will be buzzing to hear this live for the first time hopefully in the near future.

Definitely Maybe (1994) Oasis Anyone who knows me personally, is fully aware of the love I have for this band and especially this outstanding album. It was their debut, and it changed the lives of so many working class people across the country. I have loved them deeply ever since. My favourite track is “Slide Away”, oh the lyrics!

Moseley Shoals (1996) Ocean Colour Scene A gem of a record created by a group of brilliant musicians who have a unique sound. What an album! I know every lyric to every song and so do many of my friends. If there is an album to play this is the one that will get you dancing. My favourite track is “The day we caught the train”.

First dance at my wedding and one of the best songs to sing out loud.

Back to Black (2006) Amy Winehouse Why did she have to leave this world so soon?! I miss her voice, darkness and style so much. Amy really did make a mark on my life. The pain and heart ache of this album just makes it incredibly special. Her bluesy tone and stripped bare lyrics make this my all time album. My favourite track is ”Love is a losing game”. w

Missing milestones & lockdown birthdays By: LYNNE COATES

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had it all planned - a rooftop party, with dinner in a private dining room in one of Harrogate’s trendiest restaurants.

All my closest girlfriends and family were coming and I was going to pour bubbles over my ‘big’ birthday, sailing effortlessly into my eighth decade. Instead I woke up on 11th May feeling disproportionately disappointed; a quarantine birthday was not what I had in mind at all!

Turning 70 is one heck of a milestone. Until now I have not really thought that much about age. I have luckily been healthy and fit, living life to the full, married (for fifty years!) with two grown up children and two adorable grandsons. I have had interesting careers, ranging from running my own fashion business, to enrolling at university as a 47 year old to study photography, gaining two degrees, and embarking on a career in photojournalism.. For the last

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“I can honestly say I still feel around 40ish in my head, and I think that’s a good thing”

fifteen or so years I have been producing travel features and, until now, travelling regularly all over the world. I was only slightly ageaware. Sometimes, on challenging press trips, after a full day of touring, the younger journalists would still be partying late into the night. I would sneak off to bed and leave them to it. Generally though, I keep up, often racing ahead with my camera, as I do get very motivated when visiting new places. Travel has definitely kept me young and engaged. I love meeting new people of all ages, and enjoy the challenges that press trips often present. Last year, in Las Vegas, I was the only woman in the group of journalists who took on the challenge of driving a Ferrari at speed round a race track (amazing!) though I declined the opportunity to zip wire because I don’t do heights.

I like to think I look younger than I am. People seem genuinely

surprised when they find out my age. Not that I often tell them, as I’m a bit of a closet oldie. I haven’t had botox, filler or face lifts and don’t intend to, though I do take care of my skin. And, thanks to a healthy Mediterranean diet, have remained a size 10. I love clothes, though I’m not a designer

clone, preferring brands like Zara, Whistles and Mint Velvet. When I’m not working, I mostly live in jeans and trainers. I find gyms deadly boring but I do have two adorable rescue dogs that demand to be walked every day, and they keep me fit. I can honestly say I still feel around 40ish in my head, and I think that’s a good thing. I rarely say no to new challenges and refuse to let age define me.

Clearly all travel is on hold for the foreseeable future, so I am thinking of dipping back into the world of fashion. I am not exactly sure how this will work out, but I am excited to have a go, and make use of this time to reinvent myself yet again, because that’s what makes me feel alive. I’m not ready to slip into comfy slippers just yet!! w Follow Lynne’s travels on Instagram @ lynnecoatesphoto December 2020 / issue 03

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A L LOW YO U R S E L F TO D I S C OV E R THE BEAUTIFYING PROPERTIES O F C R Y S TA L S W I T H O U R C O N S C I O U S LY C U R A T E D C O L L E C T I O N O F TA L I S M A N S

WELCOME TO YOUR MINDFUL BEAUTY RITUAL TA L I S M A L O N D O N . C O M