CAREGIVER Magazine-Providing Options And Support-Issue 23-October/November 2022

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

1

Your resource for skilled nursing and long-term care discharge coordination.

Ask about our specialty care including Physical Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Speech Language Therapy, Your res Wound Care, Non-Invasive Ventilator, IV Medications, and long Wearable Defibrillator and Tracheostomy Care.

2

CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23

coordina CaregiverOklahoma.com

GREATER OKLAHOMA CITY METRO AREA BETHANY The Grand at Bethany Skilled Nursing & Therapy 7000 NW 32nd Street 405-789-7242

EL RENO River Oaks Skilled Nursing & Therapy 1901 Parkview Drive 405-262-2833

BLANCHARD Senior Village Healthcare Center 1104 N Madison Ave 405-485-3315

NORMAN Grace Skilled Nursing & Therapy 4554 W Main Street 405-366-8800

CHICKASHA Cottonwood Creek Skilled Nursing & Therapy 2300 Iowa Avenue 405-224-6456

Holiday Heights Healthcare Center 301 E Dale 405-321-7932

DEL CITY Mid-Del Skilled Nursing & Therapy 400 S Scott Street 405-677-3349 EDMOND Bradford Village Healthcare Center 906 N Boulevard 405-341-0810

OKLAHOMA CITY Brookwood Skilled Nursing & Therapy 940 SW 84th Street 405-636-0626 Capitol Hill Skilled Nursing & Therapy 2400 SW 55th Street 405-681-5381

Kingwood Skilled Nursing & Therapy 1921 NE 21st Street 405-424-1449 St. Ann’s Skilled Nursing & Therapy 9400 St. Ann Drive 405-728-7888 Wildewood Skilled Nursing & Therapy 1913 NE 50th Street 405-427-5414 The Wilshire Skilled Nursing & Therapy 505 E Wilshire Blvd 405-478-0531 SHAWNEE The Regency Skilled Nursing & Therapy 1610 N Bryan Avenue 405-275-9004

32 Skilled Nursing &

The Timbers Skilled Nursing & Therapy 2520 S Rankin Street 405-341-1433

Fairmont Skilled Nursing & Therapy Memory Care 3233 NW 10th Street 405-943-8366

source for skilled nursing g-term care discharge ation.

Bridges Health is a Skilled Nursing & Therapy Facility Management Company. Each location is independently owned and operated

Claim your FREE digital subscription at

STILLWATER Stillwater Creek Skilled Nursing & Therapy 1215 W 10th Street 405-372-1000 TECUMSEH Heritage Skilled Nursing & Therapy

EL RENO River Oaks

201 W Walnut Street 405-598-2167 CaregiverOklahom a.com

3

CONTENT

26 Patriotic Salute 08 29 Movie Spotlight The Inspirational Fred Vines

Elvis

ASK Lisa 14 31 8 Signs

We’re Here To Help

CAREGIVERS CORNER Advocacy Tips For Families

Can You Safely Age In Place?

18 38 Hats For History Receives High Marks

42

Community Heartbeat 22 42 All-American Boy Things You Need To Know About

My Hero

Medicare Jet Setters 26 44 Remember When...

Groovy Old Sitcoms

Thanksgiving!

44 ON THE COVER: Meet Fred Vines. His love and dedication to his family and our country are admirable and inspirational. At 96 years young he embodies what getting Better With Age truly means. He is a shining example of valor and heroism.

Enjoy reading his story, Patriotic Salute: Fred Vines, on page 8.

44 CAREGIVER Magazine CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23 Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Join us for these fall events!

And check our website for our other free events open to the public

Inflation Can be Scary!

No need to fear! Learn what you need to know about Retirement Community Life. Even with inflation rising, you can plan for your future and get answers at this informative, no-obligation session! s Saving Lock in e rates efor s

Monday, OCTOBER 17 -OR- Tuesday, OCTOBER 18th 10:30 am-noon 10:30 am-noon th

Presented by Jill Huff, this is an opportunity to ask questions in a comfortable environment and learn what you need to know including: • • • •

What are the different types of retirement communities?

What does “fee for service” mean?

What is a “life care community”?

What are the costs? How can I save now and what should I put aside for my future?

• What are the financial and physical qualifications I have to meet?

JILL HUFF • What differences are there between local communities?

Marketing Director • How can I “try out” a community before making a commitment?

• How does Long Term Care Insurance work?

Asking questions now could save you a lot financially as well as give you the information you need to make the right choice for you.

b try fee & en HANGE! C

Thinking about a move?

If you are thinking about a move, lock in your rate now! Our fees are changing November 1st—you don’t have to MOVE by this date, but a deposit will lock in the best rate going forward. The fee changes will affect entry fees AND monthly fees... it’s a lifetime savings of over $40,000!

Operation Veteran Aid Thursday, Oct. 20th 10:30 a.m. - noon Are you a veteran or a surviving spouse? You may be missing out on unclaimed financial reimbursement for “Aid and Attendance.”

Speaker Don Soard will give valuable information and answer any questions at this free session!

out the Learn ab ls that l too r financia lp pay fo could he ving! senior li

Aid and Attendance (or “pension”) is a little-known Veterans’ disability income that provides supplemental income to disabled or older veterans who have low income OR have high medical expenses. Income can be adjusted for unreimbursed medical expenses, and this allows many more to qualify for monthly benefits. Join us to find out if you or your spouse qualifies!

Call Jill at (405) 354-5906 or register for any event at spanishcove.com/events Events will be held at The Cove Academy 120 E. Vandament, Yukon, OK trust tax-exempt organization.5 C l a i m y oSpanish u r F R E ECove d i g iRetirement t a l s u b s c rVillage i p t i o n isa a t not-for-profit C a r e g i v e r O kpublic lahom a . c 501(c)(3) om

Dear Readers, I hope you are well. It’s been wonderful seeing so many amazing readers over the past few months at events we hosted or have been a part of in the community. Many of you have called this past year when things have become difficult or you have contacted one of the advertisers or agencies we have highlighted and shared how the help and services they provide are making a difference in your life. It is very gratifying to know our mission of providing options and support to families is being met. I have become friends with so many of you.

We have laughed and cried together as you share your joys and struggles to care for your loved ones.

You inspire us daily. In an ever-changing world that seems to highlight the worst of individuals and ideas but what I see in you, the readers, is the best of humanity filled with kindness, compassion and love.

I humbly thank each of you.

Autumn is here in all its glorious splendor and each day feeling the change of season in the air makes me happy to live in Oklahoma. Where I feel recalibrated by nature and the change in seasons balances my soul. Seasons serve such a purpose to us, a three-month block of time that so much can be achieved with reflection on the past season and anticipation of the next.

Whenever I feel out of sync or overwhelmed, a little time alone in nature always gives me perspective on how wondrous life is and how healthy it is to get outside and enjoy the change of scenery God provides.

Thanksgiving is fast approaching and I hope everyone savors the meaning and spirit of that special day. It is about family, honoring traditions, and slowing down even if it is only for that one day. It is about recognizing where we come from and where we are going. It isn’t just about the food, no, that isn’t the most important part of the day. It is about being present in the moment around people you love.

Some of you may be thinking to yourself, yes, but around my table, there is one less plate this year and I am grieving and lonely. Grief is a journey that is not linear. Some days are harder than others. If I could give one piece of advice on grief. Every tear deserves a smile. Let me explain, no death is not humorous, when sadness comes over you lean into it and have a good cry or scream if that helps but don’t imprison yourself there. Think of the good times when your loved one made you laugh and feel loved. When you experience grief it is an outward validation of your personal ability to give and receive love. Grief is inevitable, loneliness is a choice. Get out of your house and meet people, and make friends that you share a common interest.

This issue is dedicated in honor of Veterans Day to all American Veterans and military families who have sacrificed so much to safeguard our American freedoms and way of life. This is a difficult time in our history. No one person on earth can fix and solve global issues if they say they can, they’re a megalomaniac and delusional. Focusing too much on everything wrong in the world is only a distraction cooked up by politicians, business tycoons, and the media to convince you they have or are the solution to all your problems may be more of the cause but you are the solution. We each have the ability to make personal choices that will positively impact our life and that of our home, our family, and our community. If the entire world could see the key to solving world issues is stronger, healthier families through personal responsibility and accountability there really wouldn’t be many problems left to solve.

May God bless each of you and your families. May we all reflect on what we are truly thankful for in our lives. Show kindness to those less fortunate and be a little more understanding with each other and yourself. I wish you the happiest of Thanksgiving days.

P.O. Box 721673 Oklahoma City, OK 73172 EDITORIAL Editor-In-Chief LaShanya Nash Art Director Angela Blake Writers Denise Heath Robbie Lamberson LaShanya Nash John Spivey Lisa Sydnor Kathy Cocks, RN Angela Blake Shelley Stutchman Jim Kettler Emberlee Nash Cover Photographer Jessie Newell Contributing Photographers Jessie Newell Emberlee Nash

Community Outreach Lisa Sydnor 405-314-7840 l.sydnor@betterwithageok.com

Layout Wise Marketing ADVERTISING Publisher LaShanya Nash 405.532.6057 l.nash@betterwithageok.com ACCOUNTING ANDREA O’HAIR

Sincerely,

Digital Copy:

LaShanya L. Nash

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Publisher 6

CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Independent Living

Assisted Living

Memory Care

FREE HELP Exploring Senior Care and Housing Options.

How to get started...

We will meet with you or fill out a brief assessment over the phone.

Discuss what type of community and locations best meet your needs.

Review financial resources and identify communities that fit your budget.

Schedule and accompany you on tours to help evaluate the offerings of each community.

We help coordinate the move in and follow up as you settle into your new home.

Call Bill Today!

405-308-6433 Searching for Senior care housing can be overwhelming.

Explore your options with an experienced, credible and unbiased guide.

No cost, that's right!

Absolutely FREE, personalized service to help you find the best senior living solution for you.

Bill Muir, CSA, Certified Senior Advisor

Owner, Compass Senior Living Solutions

Bill has over a decade of experience in the senior care industry.

Bill@SeniorLivingSolutionsOK.com

Silver Sponsor of

www.SeniorLivingSolutionsOK.com Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

7

Patriotic Salute -

FRED VINES

By Lisa Sydnor

The definition of a Renaissance man, or woman, is a person who is well educated, sophisticated, and has talent and knowledge in many different fields of study. Leonardo da Vinci is noted as an example of a Renaissance man. Fred Vines is a man of many talents and interests; some might even label him a “Renaissance” man. Fred designs and tends to the landscaping of his approximately 21 acres of land near Shawnee. He plants and grows beautiful flower gardens; and mows the acre plus “yard”. He has planted a garden of vegetables including potatoes, tomatoes, and onions, and is harvesting the rewards. Fred is a poet and a photographer who has chronicled his family history through his storytelling. He handles all his affairs for himself and his daughter. Fred is a survivor, a hero, a veteran, and a caregiver; but mostly, he is a kind, loving, humble man. Some might say a true Renaissance man.

Fred celebrated his 96th birthday on May 29th.

Fred is very proud of his family’s patriotic commitment to our country. Upon turning 18, while still in high

8 8 CAREGIVER Magazine CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23 Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com CaregiverOklahoma.com

school, Fred was drafted. He later returned to school and at the age of 22, got his High School diploma. In 1949, Fred and Billie Ruth Massey, married. They had two daughters; Karen and Judy. Judy passed away from cancer in 1968 at the age of 16; Karen has been in a long-term care facility for more than 3 years. Fred and Billie were married 66 years.

Billie was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2008. Caring for Billie at home for the first four years after the Alzheimer’s diagnosis made the decision to move her to a memory care facility very difficult. The progression of Alzheimer’s demanded constant supervision and skilled care, more than Fred could provide for her at home. Billie passed in 2016.

Soon after Billie passed, Fred was again in the role of caregiver. His daughter, Karen Vines, required in-patient long-term care. He has been helping with her care for more than four years. Fred continues daily personal visits with Karen and multiple phone

THE CARE YOU NEED, THE RESPECT YOU DESERVE At Homestead, our team helps seniors remain independent while providing quality care in a friendly environment. Let our team help you find the right care solution for your family.

CALL A HOMESTEAD NEAR YOU TO SCHEDULE A TOUR BETHANY

405-445-0172

CLINTON

580-309-5947

KINGFISHER*

405-689-9818

DEL CITY**

405-689-9318

OWASSO*

918-216-0568

ELK CITY**

580-751-2010

WEATHERFORD* 580-530-3440

AssistedLivingOklahoma.com

*These communities also offer memory care for residents with Alzheimer’s and other memory-related diseases. **These Communities offer memory care and independent living C l a i m y oCulra iFmR EyEo ud ri gFi Rt aElE sduibgsi ct ar il pst ui obns carti pCt ai or en g ai vt eCr O a rkel ga ihvoemr Oa k. cl oa hmo m a . c o m

99

YOUR RECOVERY IS OUR FOCUS

conversations. Fred was instrumental in assisting his only grandchild, Andrew, in completing his education and receiving his doctorate in physical therapy from Oklahoma University.

SIENNA TREATS A WIDE RANGE OF CONDITIONS INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO:

During World War II, Fred and three of his brothers were in the military at the same time. Fred is the only sibling who served in WWII and Korea. Fred’s military service was from September 1944 – November 1946.

He served as a PFC in the 40th Division Infantry, 108 Regiment; First Battalion. He spent most of his combat time on the Philippine Islands. From the Philippines, he went to Korea.

• Congestive Heart Failure • Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease • Cardiac Rehab • Pneumonia • Orthopedic Injuries • Stroke • Neurological Disorders • Complete Joint Replacement • Infectious Disease • Wound Care • Diabetes Management • Reconditioning Due to Illness or Injury

www.siennacare.net

Fred is the recipient of the Combat Infantryman Badge; Bronze Star; Asiatic-Pacific Campaign Medal; Philippine Liberation Medal; World War II Victory Medal; Army of Occupation Medal; Expert Infantryman Badge; Bronze Service Star; Bronze Arrowhead; Honorable Service Lapel Button; and, Trusty Shellback Card.

9221 Harmony Dr. • Midwest City • 405.869.0700 101 0CAREGIVER Magazine CAREGIVER Magazine

His nephew, Colonel Brian Vines, Retired, served 20 years in the Army. Brian’s wife, Major Natalie Vines, was medically discharged in 2013, due to injuries

Issue 23 Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com CaregiverOklahoma.com

received in Iraq. Fred, Brian, and Natalie all suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). PTSD is caused by traumatic events and is characterized by intrusive thoughts about the incident(s), recurrent distress/anxiety, flashbacks, and avoidance of similar situations.

Brian’s two sons, Fred’s great-nephews, are carrying their family military service tradition forward as they currently serve in the Marines and in the Army National Guard.

Honor Flight Network recognizes American veterans for their sacrifices and achievements by flying them to Washington, D.C. to see their memorial of service at no cost. Top priority is given to World War II and terminally ill veterans from all wars.

Honor Flight Network has expanded to include Korean War and Vietnam War veterans. In order for Honor Flight Network to achieve this goal, guardians fly with the veterans on every

A new season of senior living is waiting!

Call us today and schedule your tour!

(405) 888-8098

ElisonStatesmanClub.com

10401 Vineyard Blvd., Oklahoma City, OK 73120

(405) 340-5311

(405) 359-1230

1225 Lakeshore Dr., Edmond, OK 73013

2709 E. Danforth Rd., Edmond, OK 73034

AL 5525-5525

AL 5525-5525

LyndaleEdmond.com

VeradenLife.com

C l a i m y oCul ra iFmR Ey Eo udri gF iRt aE lE sdui bg si tcarli pstui bo sn c ar it p Ct iaor ne gai tv eCraOr ke lgai hv oe m r Oak. cl aohmo m a . c o m

1 111

flight providing assistance and helping veterans have a safe, memorable, and rewarding experience.

In May 2022, Fred was chosen to participate in the Honor Flight Network. Fred’s nephew, Col. Brian Vines, Retired, was his guardian for this trip. As part of the experience, guardians are offered the opportunity to share information about their veterans. Col. Vines participated saying, “Let me introduce to you my hero, my uncle, Fred Vines.” The Colonel spoke on the many reasons Fred is his hero; including childhood memories, data from combat zone reports, and honors bestowed by a grateful Nation. His words invoked a standing ovation and a parade of fellow passengers who wanted to shake hands and thank a hero veteran and all-around nice guy. Fred stated, “I’ve never considered myself a war hero.”

And, that is another reason to honor this humble, kind, loving man; our very own Renaissance man, Fred Vines.

Among his accolades most recently is gracing the cover of the Hughes County Tribune in the June 9, 2022 issue. Fred Vines, veteran, husband, father, son, brother, friend, poet, and storyteller extraordinaire; thank you for your service to our country. d Dryer D Fille uc t n t Li

Duct Cleaning starts at $99.00 121 2CAREGIVER Magazine CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23 Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com CaregiverOklahoma.com

(405) 535-9987

Its Never Too Late To Live Happily Ever After.

UPCOMING EVENTS —

Mark your calendar and come join the fun!

10/31

Halloween Town Day “Spooktackular”

11/17

1950s Day “Sock Hop Dance”

12/15

North Pole Day “Holiday Dessert Reception”

LionwoodSeniorLiving.com OK 73120 C l a i m y o u r F R E E | d12525 i g i t a l s u b sN c r iPennsylvania p t i o n a t C a r e g i v e r O kAve, l a h o m aOKC, .com

13

ASK Lisa

By Lisa Sydnor

The staffofof CAREGIVER Magazine is committed to The staff CAREGIVER Magazine is committed to connecting those in need with services and programs.

If you have a question connecting those in need with services and programs. or you are looking for services, call 405-314-7840 or email

Ifl.sydnor@betterwithageok.com; you have a question, 405-314-7840 includecall your name and phone number in the message. We can help you find resources such as

or email l.sydnor@betterwithageok.com 211; NewView Oklahoma; Will Rogers Senior Center; aInclude home healthname care agency; a placenumber to live, fraud prevention, etc. your and phone in the message.

Phone rings.

I answer: “Hello” Response:” Oh, I’ve called the wrong number.”

Me: “Maybe not.

Who are you trying to reach?”

Response: “I have a CAREGIVER Magazine and I am trying to reach AskLisa.”

ME: “You’ve reached Lisa.

How may I help you?”

RESPONSE: “I can’t believe you actually answered the phone!”

Questions about Medicare?

We provide free, unbiased counseling and assistance for Medicare beneficiaries, their representatives or people who will soon be eligible for Medicare.

We can help you compare plans and save money.

Call us for FREE help.

• Counseling about Medicare options • Report potential Medicare fraud • Apply for assistance with prescription drug costs

14

CAREGIVER Magazine

1.800.763.2828 | MAP.OID.OK.GOV

A DIVISION OF THE OKLAHOMA INSURANCE DEPARTMENT

This project was supported, in part by grant number 90SAPG0086-01-01, from the U.S. Administration for Community Living, Department of Health and Human Services, Washington, D.C. 20201.

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

This scenario plays out in various forms often! Yes, I will answer your calls, text messages or emails.

This column is to address real issues in real-time with real information.

A woman in her mid-80s told me she hasn’t gone to the grocery store in over a year and wants to go do her own grocery shopping, find ways to expand her social network, go to a senior center, and meet new people.

IMAGINE ALL YOUR RELOCATION PIECES COMING TOGETHER SEAMLESSLY

“

IMAGINE ALL YOUR RELOCATION PIECES I am THINKING forever grateful to have had ABOUT SELLING Connie to sell my home, and, also COMING TOGETHER SEAMLESSLY FAMILY HOME, helped me inYOUR purchasing my current

“

home. She has a heart for her clients RELOCATING and invaluable expertise in the OR entire DOWNSIZING?

process! Thank you, Connie!

I am forever grateful to have had Transportation is difficult as she uses a wheelchair.

- Frances Baker Connie to sell my home, and, also She can move from chair to vehicle without helped me in purchasing my current assistance; however, she needs the wheelchair home. She has a heart for her clients collapsed and stowed in the vehicle. Having and invaluable expertise inA the entireFOR ALL SEASONS OF LIFE: REALTOR assistance in getting purchases from vehicle to process! Thank you, Connie!

Connie@HomesteadRealtyco.com | 405.613.6890 | Connie.HomesteadRealtyco.com apartment would be a plus.

- Frances Baker

For most of us, going to the grocery store is not a much-anticipated outing; it is a chore. If you have I am forever grateful to have had Connie to limited stamina or restricted range of motion or sell my home, and, also helped me in purchasA REALTOR FOR ALL SEASONS OF LIFE: other circumstances which make a simple trip to ing my current home. She has a heart for her Connie@HomesteadRealtyco.com | Connie.HomesteadRealtyco.com the grocery store virtually impossible. Add to the | 405.613.6890 clients and invaluable expertise in the entire mix, multiple trips to get items into your residence; putting items away; the list goes on.

process! Thank you, Connie!

- Frances Baker

Several companies have transportation options and offer collaboration opportunities with shopping services The trusty standby of “211” continues to be a recommendation as well as contacting neighborhood libraries, churches and community centers. Be proactive, ask for help, find someone to help identify your needs/wants and have some fun!

FOR A FREE CONSULTATION CALL ®

405.613.6890

Homestead & Co Realty 2601 Kelley Pointe Pkwy, Ste 201 Edmond, OK 73012

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

Cell: 405.613.6890

15

Thank You For Your Service —

Tha han nk Yo You u for your service!

Now let us be in service to you...

7 State Veterans Homes Cemetery / Burial Education & Training Employment Support & Referrals Entrepreneurship 16

Mental Health Support & Suicide Prevention State Benefits VA Claims & Benefits Veteran-Owned Businesses Women Veterans Program

405-523-4000 | OKLAHOMA.GOV/VETERANS CAREGIVER Magazine Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

ARDMORE VETERANS HOME 1015 S Commerce St Ardmore , OK 73401 Phone: (580) 223-2266 CLAREMORE VETERANS CENTER 3001 W. Blue Starr Drive Claremore , OK 74017-0988 Phone: 918-342-5432 CLINTON VETERANS CENTER 1701 South 4th St, Clinton , OK 73601 Phone: 580-331-2200 LAWTON/FT SILL VETERANS HOME 501 S.E. Flower Mound Road Lawton , OK 73501 Phone: 580-351-6511 NORMAN VETERANS HOME 1776 E. Robinson St. Norman, OK 73070 Phone: 405-360-5600 SALLISAW VETERANS HOME – COMING SOON— SULPHUR VETERANS HOME 304 E. Fairlane Sulphur , OK 73086 Phone: 580-331-6400 TALIHINA VETERANS CENTER 10014 SE. 1138th Ave, Talihina, OK 74571 Phone: 918-567-2251 Fax: 918-567-2950 Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

17

CAREGIVERS O R N E R By Kathy Cocks, RN Advocacy Tips For Families I sat on the bench outside in Oklahoma’s recent heat wave listening to a family member struggling to find the right care for Dad. Dad was getting weaker and had recently been in the hospital due to a fall. Now he was in a skilled nursing facility receiving rehabilitation to get some strength back. He was having a hard time feeding himself in bed. When our loved one encounters medical professionals, it is important to advocate for them, especially if they are unable to advocate for themselves.

When an older person goes to the hospital or a skilled facility a lot is happening to them. Many older people are not able to process several things happening at once to them. Therefore, it is important for the family to be involved. In our advocacy, we should still involve our loved one that is receiving care as much as possible.

First, ask your family member what they feel is going on. Maybe they are just frustrated because the food does not taste good to them. When you are dealing with many things, sometimes you forget the basics.

If food is a problem, we can ask the staff if our loved one can order something different or if food can be brought from outside. Getting your loved one to relax is going to improve the healing process.

The second part of advocacy is to focus on what is going well in the health care facility. Sometimes it is easy to see the flaws or small mistakes and get angry.

Did the night shift nurse go out of their way to bring your loved one a warm blanket and calm their fears?

Did an aide treat them with dignity if they had an accident? All day long their professional caregivers are doing small acts and noticing those acts and giving them a small thank you is more likely to have them pay more attention to your loved one.

Thirdly learn to ask questions. For example, If you are confused about why your family member does not have any water, ask, “Is there a reason my dad does not have any water?” Your family member might be on nothing by mouth because of an upcoming procedure

Grow Your Business, ADVERTISE With Us!

CALL TODAY 405-532-6057 CAREGIVER Magazine Print and Digital

CAREGIVER B2B Networking Groups

Better With Age Events

www.caregiveroklahoma.com

18

CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

or a choking episode. If the staff forgot to get them the water many times they will apologize and fix the problems. If you do not understand something that was explained to you let the staff know and say, “Can you explain it in a different way.” One time I texted a friend of mine that was sick and asked, “Are you SOB?” Then I realized what I had typed—in nursing speak SOB means short of breath. I quickly sent another text explaining the acronym. I did not want to lose a friend. As a nurse, I constantly must remind myself to explain something in language people understand.

Next, realize when a loved one is in a hospital or medical setting everyone is very stressed, and emotions are running high. When you feel stressed and out of control it is best to leave the environment and relax. It might only be 10 minutes in the chapel gathering your thoughts or taking a short walk. When we are stressed, we do not think clearly. This is the time to find out what has made you upset. Many times, we get upset about things we cannot control.

Once you have calmed down and organized your

Kathy Cocks, RN www.kathysconsulting.com

405-202-0708 info@kathysconsulting.com

A comprehensive approach of care to clients with Alzheimer's and other forms of dementia.

An increased positive emotional experience by engaging clients with the world and people around them.

Focuses on accentuating the positive by supporting and encouraging the clients remaining skills and abilities.

We Tailor In-Home Care to Meet Your Needs Alzheimer’s and Dementia Care

Services Include:

Private-Duty Nursing

Personal Care Companion Care

Medication Reminders Family Respite

Personal Home Care Meal Preparation Light Housekeeping

405-217-0706 ComForCare.com/OKC 2019 ComForCare Franchise Systems, LLC Each office is Independently owned and operated and are equal opportunity employers

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

19

thoughts then you can have a thoughtful conversation with the medical staff.

Lastly, identify gaps in your loved one’s care. Currently, you want to get the health care team to work with you to fill in those gaps.

With the family above I recommended they talk to the charge nurse and ask that the care plan state that the client should be placed in a chair with dinner set close to him so that he could feed himself. If the family member is in the hospital, I recommend talking to the charge nurse first about your concerns and how they can be addressed. Even if you do not have a solution talk to the nurse about your concerns and ask for their input on how to resolve them. If you are experiencing a problem, other families have too, and the medical staff may have discovered some creative and helpful ways to address your concerns.

Remember that the health care team wants a successful medical stay for your family member as much as you do. Working with the health care team hopefully will make that hospital or facility stay a little less stressful for everyone involved, and facilitate healing and recovery time for your loved one.

PAY LESS

Locate your MIPPA coordinator and contact them today.

for Medicare & Medicines If you answer YES to these 3 questions, you may qualify for assistance!

3 Do you have Medicare?

3 Are you having trouble paying for your prescription medications and Medicare Premiums?

3 Do you have limited income and resources?

Human Services

Jean Kidd

Teresa Ryan

Mary Ann Briscoe

Marilyn Conley

Sue Grant

Debra Shadid

Elizabeth.Kidd@okdhs.org (405) 630-9715

Anita.CTR.Ryan@okdhs.org (405) 642-1538

MaryAnn.Briscoe@okdhs.org (405) 640-1002 Sgrant@incog.org (918) 579-9477

Marilyn.CTR.Conley@okdhs.org (405) 982-1914 Debra.CTR.Shadid@okdhs.org (405) 212-7910

For more information go to https://oklahoma.gov/okdhs/medicareandmeds/mippa.html

20

CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

HERE TO SERVE OUR COMMUNITY

Plan Of Care An individualized plan of care is developed for each patient, identifying his/her special medical and physical needs and strengths.

Intensive rehabilitation

Our center’s progressive treatment program is ideal for those recovering from surgery, illness or injury.

We use an interdisciplinary team approach to manage the physical and emotional care needs of our patients.

FIVE LOCATIONS TO SERVE YOU

Specialized Nursing Care

The transition from hospital to home is further enhanced by a nursing staff trained and experienced in both medical management and rehabilitation.

Following physician’s protocols, our professional nursing team provides medical assessment and monitoring, medication and pain management as well as rehabilitative support.

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com www.emeraldoklahoma.com

21

C MMUNITY HEARTBEAT

By Lisa Sydnor

THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW Now is the time to ask questions!

This Issue highlights information you need whether you are a caregiver or care receiver. There are conferences coming up as well as various seminars that highlight the many different stages of caregiving and the complexity of needs.

Location: Project H.E.A.R.T. 830 W Ford, Shawnee, Oklahoma Free lunch and door prizes Debra Case, Caregiver Coordinator (405) 273-6410 ext. 130

Medicare Open Enrollment is Oct 15 – Dec 7, 2022. Take time to research your options. If you have Medicare Advantage, do not assume you have Medicaid Advantage. It is not the same thing. Call the knowledgeable personnel at the Oklahoma Insurance Department or Oklahoma Department of Human Resources or Oklahoma Department of Rehabilitative Services. Get the facts that enable you to make informed decisions.

TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 1, 2022 AT 10 AM 2022 Oklahoma Family Caregiver Conference The Oklahoma Family Caregiver Conference will be held virtually on November 1st, 2022, from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. The theme of this year’s conference is “Family Caregivers Are Superheroes.” Participants will connect with other family caregivers, learn about support resources, and be eligible to win giveaways! Additionally, you can keep up with announcements about the event on the OKCares Facebook page and learn more about caregiver resources at OKCares.org.

NOW IS THE TIME TO ASK QUESTIONS. The Oklahoma Insurance Department wants to help you make the right choice for you. As a state agency, they aren’t selling anything. Their only agenda is to help you make the right choice for you and your situation. Live webinars begin on October 4th and end on October 25th. This year, they have four webinars featuring leading experts in Medicare.

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 15, 2022, 10AM-2PM COEDD Area Agency on Aging Is Hosting Caregiving: Where Do I Begin?

22

CAREGIVER Magazine

MIPPA: Medicare Improvements for Patients & Providers Act Do you have limited resources or income? Do you have to choose between your monthly prescriptions and other expenses? Oklahoma Human Services offers programs to help low-income seniors and persons with disabilities to apply for two programs that help pay for their Medicare expenses:

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Low Income Subsidy (LIS) or “Extra Help” If you are on Medicare and have trouble paying for your prescription medications you might qualify for this program. Eligibility varies depending on marital status, income, and resources Everyone is encouraged to inquire

older, or age 21 or older if disabled. ADvantage Program members must be SoonerCare eligible and reside in the designated service area. The number of members in the ADvantage Waiver is limited.

Home and Community Based Services Waivers for persons with physical disabilities

(b) Medically Fragile Waiver. The Medically Fragile Waiver Program is a Medicaid Home and Community Based Services (HCBS) Waiver used to finance non-institutional long-term care services through Oklahoma’s SoonerCare program for medically fragile individuals. To receive Medically Fragile Program services, individuals must be at least 19 years of age, be SoonerCare eligible, and meet the OHCA skilled nursing facility (SNF) or hospital level of care (LOC) criteria.

Eligibility does not guarantee placement in the program as Waiver membership is limited.

(a) ADvantage Waiver. The ADvantage Waiver Program is a Medicaid Home and Community Based Services (HCBS) Waiver used to finance non-institutional long-term care services through Oklahoma’s SoonerCare program for elderly and disabled individuals in specific waiver areas. To receive ADvantage Program services, individuals must meet the nursing facility level of care criteria, be age 65 years or

There are many resources available to the community.

The United Way of Central Oklahoma, Heartland 211, Oklahoma Insurance Department, Oklahoma Department of Human Services, Oklahoma Department of Veterans Affairs, VA Hospital, the list is long. Call 405-314-7840 for more information. The ASKLisa column in this magazine can assist in getting the right numbers for the services you seek. Ask for help.

Medicare Savings Program Depending on your particular situation you might qualify to have your Part A and/or Part B premiums reduced or eliminated Diabetes Supplies & Services

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

23

Live Well with ArchWell

We’re helping Oklahoma City seniors get well, stay well and live well.

Welcome to a higher level of healthcare for seniors: ArchWell HealthTM. We’re here to improve all aspects of our members’ lives through a special kind of healthcare that focuses on wellness, community and strong member/doctor relationships.

24

CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

We’re different from your typical doctor’s office. Here’s how: +

We specialize in care for seniors.

+

Doctors who actually spend time with you.

+

Available same-day appointments, so you can see your doctor when you need to.

+

Your healthcare team works with you to help keep you healthy, not just treat you when you’re ill.

A vibrant healthcare community focused on you and your wellness.

Our centers are welcoming communities where you can enjoy fitness classes, board and card games and many other activities.

It’s a great way to connect with other seniors. Need a ride? We’ll gladly provide transportation to and from the center.

To learn more, or to schedule a tour, call 405.251.8885 or visit ArchWellHealth.com.

Locations Mid-Del 6951 Southeast 15th St Midwest City, OK 73110 live well with archwell

Windsor 4629 NW 23rd St Oklahoma City, OK 73127 Southwestern 7313 S Western Ave Oklahoma City, OK 73139

TM

primary care doctors for seniors

405.251.8885 • ArchWellHealth.com • Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

25 © 2022 ArchWell Health

By Neil Johnson, and Shelley Stutchman-Johnson

MEDICARE

Neil and I got tired of all the shows that stressed us out and didn’t make us laugh. To remedy that, we wrote down all our favorite sitcoms from the ‘50s, ‘60s, ‘70s, and ‘80s. We cut our list apart and put the pieces of paper in a Ziplock bag. On those evenings, we want to return to a simpler time; we draw one of those slips of paper with a sitcom written on it out of the bag and find the show on TV. We sit back, enjoy our popcorn, and laugh for thirty minutes. We have included a groovy list of some of the ones we like to get you started in your blast from the past journey this fall.

CAREGIVER Magazine 26 2 6 CAREGIVER Magazine

GROOVY OLD SITCOMS Fall is in the air. What could be better than a cozy evening sitting on the couch, popping a bowl of popcorn, and watching your favorite sitcoms from your past?

That Girl: 1966-1971: Amazon Prime Video Marlo Thomas played Ann Marie in the sitcom That Girl. She was beautiful, independent, bubbly, and sweet.

That Girl was the first TV series to feature a single woman as the lead character. Ann Marie became our role model as an independent woman. However, it was still the 60s, and Ann, even though liberated, always discussed her decisions with her boyfriend, Donald.

Ann Marie and Donald had an innocent, pure, kind, and loving relationship. Donald was always supportive of Ann’s dreams. I wish today’s shows would develop relationships like that instead of basing the relationships on sex and money. We think we have moved forward in our thinking. However, in watching That Girl and her relationship with Don, I am not sure we have.

Issue 23 Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com CaregiverOklahoma.com

In each episode, either Beaver or Wally gets into a predicament. However, the show’s beauty is that things will always work out.

Each episode is full of the kind of humor that makes you giggle. One of my favorite lines was when Ward, his dad, asked Wally, “Hey Wally, would you tell me why you deliberately jumped into that mud puddle?”

Wally answered with a complete look of innocence, “To see if my new shoes were waterproof.”

Leave it to Beaver was the first American TV show to display a toilet tank.

Leave It to Beaver: 1957-1963: Tubi Leave It to Beaver is one of the first primetime sitcom series written from a child’s point of view. Wally and Beaver share a loveable brother-to-brother relationship throughout the entire series. You know they will always have each other’s back.

How can we not mention Ken Osmond, who played Eddie Haskell? The character we loved to hate. He was Wally’s mischievous two-faced best friend.

The underlying theme of Leave It to Beaver was that proper behavior brings rewards while improper behavior results in undesirable consequences. This theme is a perfect reminder on how to live a good life.

Celebrating over 10 years of serving Oklahomans!

There’s No Place Like Eden Care Homes!

24-Hour Assistance with Activities of Daily Living for up to 5 Older Adults in a Traditional Single-Family Home

For more information, Please Call (405) 285-5983 or email us at info@edencarehomes.com

www.edencarehomes.com

a i my oyuor uFr RFERE E dE i gd i tgai tl asl usbusbc sr ci pr ti pi ot ni o an t aCt aCr ae rgei vg ei vr eOrkOl ak hl aohmoam. ca o. cmo m C l Ca il m

2277

GROOVY OLD SITCOMS

The Bob Newhart Show: 1972-1978: YouTube What a fun sitcom that makes you laugh out loud. The dry, understated humor of Bob Newhart is hilarious. Much of the bantering consists of sarcastic remarks that are not mean. They are funny.

Bob Newhart plays a Chicago psychologist who lives with his wife Emily, a teacher, played

by Suzanne Pleshette. The episodes include Bob dealing with crazy patients, their unique ensemble of friends, and their marriage.

Carol, the receptionist, is a hoot. She is tall and sassy. Howard is the neighbor who is constantly dropping in on Bob and Emily. Jerry is the single swinging dentist representing the 70’s changing attitudes about sex.

You know you are watching a show produced in the seventies because there are jokes about girdles, and everyone wants their child to grow up to become President of the United States.

The Jeffersons: 1975-1985: Amazon Prime Video Warning, you may be shocked at how politically incorrect The Jeffersons are. The Jeffersons was one of the longestrunning series in history and the first to feature a married interracial couple. The idea for the show came after three members of the Black Panthers visited Norman Lear’s production studio. The three members said, “Every time you see a black man on the tube, he is dirt poor, dresses like crap, and can’t afford anything.”

That is when Norman Lear had George (Sherman Hemsley) get rear-ended by a bus on the sitcom, All in the Family. George filed a civil suit and won five thousand dollars. With the money, he opened the first of his drycleaning businesses. They became successful, and The Jeffersons could move on up to the East side.

During one episode, a maid asks George, “How do you afford to live in a place like this? You ain’t tall enough to be a basketball player.”

I guarantee you; that this sitcom will make your jaw drop open sometimes, but it is a perfect look back at how far we have come.

Throw that popcorn bag in the microwave, make a list of your old favorite sitcoms, sit back, and travel back in time.

28 Magazine CAREGIVER Magazine 2 8 CAREGIVER

Issue 23 Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com CaregiverOklahoma.com

When Elvis first hit it big, everyone wanted to change him.

Society wasn’t ready for a white man that sang songs like a black man. However, the fans overruled the TV executives, politicians, and Bible thumpers that wanted Elvis censored. The fans liked Elvis’s wiggle. He was a taste of forbidden fruit.

This movie captures the passion of Elvis, played by Austin Butler, and the manipulation of Colonel Tom Parker, played by Tom Hanks. The music in this movie brings back many memories to us baby boomers. The film clips of Martin Luther King and President Kennedy getting shot leaves a stunned moment of silence in our heart as we remember.

I quote Colonel Tom Parker from the movie, “It doesn’t matter if you do ten stupid things, as long as you do one smart thing.”

Movie Spotlight Groovy Films for Seniors Elvis Review by Shelley Stutchman-Johnson and Neil Johnson

Colonel Parker never missed an opportunity to make money off Elvis. He had some promotional buttons made when Elvis was very controversial for his wiggle. One button said I like Elvis. The other pin said I hate Elvis. When Elvis’s mother saw the I hate Elvis she questioned the button. Colonel Tom Parker said, “What is hate worth if it is free?”

In this movie about Elvis, you will learn many bits and pieces of information you never knew. The film is also a study between the young Elvis, who believed he could be great, and his manager, who thought Elvis would make him great.

It doesn’t matter if you are an Elvis fan or not, you will love this movie.

aim C l aC il m y o yu or uFrRFERE E dE i gd ii tgai lt aslu sb us bc sr icpr ti ipot ni o an t aCt aCr ea gr ei vgei vr Oe rkOl ak hl ao hmoam. ca o. cmo m

2299

Longterm Care Options in Oklahoma

ASSISTED LIVING

— Brought to you by the Oklahoma Assisted Living Association —

ASSISTED LIVING A home or establishment that may provide assistance with personal care, medications, ambulation, nursing supervision and intermittent or unscheduled nursing care. They cannot provide 24-hour skilled nursing care. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health Mainly Private Pay, LTC Insurance may cover , VA Aid & Attendance, & Tribal Benefits Medicaid Option through DHS (Advantage Waiver)

NURSING HOME A nursing facility that provides 24-hour skilled nursing care and related services for residents who require medical or nursing care.

Nursing Home Care Act - October 1, 1980. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health. Nursing homes provide the highest level of care.

Options for Medicare/Medicaid

ADULT DAY CARE Provides health, recreational, social and supportive services to impaired adults for more than four hours per day. Participants do not stay in the center overnight. Adult Day Care Act - November 1, 1989 Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health VA allows respite benefits Medicaid Option through DHS (Advantage Waiver)

VETERANS CARE Created in 2013, this program is for residents who are veterans living in the state veteran’s centers. They are licensed as a nursing facility and can provide 24-hour skilled nursing care and related services for residents who require medical or nursing care . Falls under Nursing Home Care Act - May 29, 2013. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health

CONTINUUM OF CARE Combines the services of a nursing facility with an assisted living center or an adult day care center. It is licensed under the Continuum of Care and Assisted Living Act and must also meet requirements applicable to nursing facilities, assisted living centers and adult day care centers. Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health Currently inOklahoma, all Continuum of Care’s only have assisted livings.

Medicaid Option through DHS (Advantage Waiver) for Assisted Living and Adult Day Care.

RESIDENTIAL CARE HOMES Provide residential accommodations, food service, and supportive assistance. May also provide assistance with meals, dressing, bathing, other personal needs, and medication administration. Cannot provide medical care such as skilled nursing. Residential Care Act - November 1, 1984 Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health A typical residential care resident is younger than other long term care options and only requires assistant with medication administration.

NO Options for Medicare/Medicaid

INDEPENDENT SENIOR LIVING/HOME CARE Apartments, cottages, and single-family homes for seniors 55 & over who do not require assistance with daily activities or 24/7 skilled nursing but may benefit from convenient services, senior-friendly surround-ings, and increased social opportunities. NOT Licensed by Oklahoma State Department of Health. No oversight since they are not licensed. May have “High Acuity” that is receiving Home Health and or Hospice services.

30

CAREGIVER Magazine

For a list of OKALA Members Visit www.OKALA.org Become a member or for more information call 405-235-5000

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

8 SIGNS

You’re Loved One Is Not Aging In Place Well

By LaShanya Nash With the holidays right around the bend scattered families will soon be together giving adult children the perfect opportunity to closely inspect how aging parents are managing. It’s no coincidence that calls to assisted living communities and other housing alternatives spike just after the holidays. That’s when relatives pick up worrisome clues of trouble or see crises unfolding before their eyes.

The following are eight potential signs of trouble. You’re not being nosy; you’re being proactive and smart.

1. GIVE A BIG HUG Look for: Obvious weight loss. Anything from depression to cancer to difficulty shopping and cooking can be behind a noticeable loss of weight.

Increased frailty. If you can notice something “different” about a person’s strength and stature just in a hug, it’s noteworthy. Pay close attention to how your loved one walks (shuffles more?) and moves (rises easily from a chair?) (has trouble with balance?), comparing these benchmarks to the last time you were together. Obvious weight gain. Injury, diabetes, and dementia (because the person doesn’t remember eating and has meals over and over) might be the cause. So can money troubles that lead to fewer fresh foods, more dried pasta and bread. Strange body odor. Sad to say, changes in personal grooming habits because of memory trouble or physical ailments might be noticeable on very close inspection. Look, too, for changes in makeup, hair, or the ability to wear clean clothes.

2. RIFFLE THROUGH THE MAIL Look for: Unopened personal mail. Everybody leaves junk mail alone, but few of us can ignore a good old-fashioned, hand-addressed letter.

Unopened bills can be a sign that your loved one is having difficulty managing finances - one of the most common first signs of dementia. Letters from

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

31

banks, creditors, or insurers may be just routine business.

But it’s alarming if they’re referring to overdue payments, overdrawn balances, recent accidents, or other worrisome events. Thank-you messages from charities. Older adults are often vulnerable to scammers, and even those who have always been fiscally prudent are vulnerable if they’re having trouble with thinking skills (a common sign of Alzheimer’s disease). Some charities hit up givers over and over, and your loved one may not remember donating the first time.

3. TAKE A DRIVE WITH MOM OR DAD BEHIND THE WHEEL Look for: Nicks or dents as you enter and exit the car.

These can be signs of careless driving.

Whether your loved one fastens his or her seatbelt. Rote basics are usually, but not always, remembered by someone with mild dementia. Signs of tension, preoccupation, or being easily distracted. Is your loved one no longer willing to drive at night? Or on highways? Is it hard for him or her to talk to you or listen to the radio and also pay close attention to the road? Signs of impaired driving. Tailgating, slow reaction time, going consistently below the speed limit, and confusing gas and brake pedals are signs to watch for.

Dashboard warning lights. Does the car have sufficient oil, gas, antifreeze, and windshield-wiper fluid?

32

CAREGIVER Magazine

4. INSPECT THE KITCHEN - FRIDGE TO COUNTER TO CUPBOARDS Look for: Perishables past their expiration dates. Your loved one might be buying more than he or she needs, as we all do -- but you want to be sure there’s a reasonable ability to ditch the old stuff (rather than use it). Multiples of the same item. Ten bottles of ketchup or a dozen different kinds of vinegar might indicate he or she can’t remember from one shopping trip to the next what’s in the cupboards at home. Appliances that are broken and haven’t been repaired.

Check the microwave, coffeemaker, toaster, washer, and dryer - any device you know your parent used to use routinely. Signs of past fire.

Look for charred stove knobs or pot bottoms, potholders with burned edges, a discharged fire extinguisher, and smoke detectors that have been disassembled. Accidents happen - but accidental fires are a common home danger for older adults. Increased takeout or simpler cooking. If someone who used to cook a lot no longer does or has downshifted to extremely simple recipes, the explanation could be a change in physical or mental ability.

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

5. LOOK AROUND THE LIVING AREAS Look for: Piles of clutter. Especially if this is a change for your loved one, being unable to throw anything away may be a sign of a neurological or physical issue. Papers that spill onto the floor are a particular tripping hazard. Cobwebs, signs of spills that haven’t been picked up, or other signs of housekeeping that’s laxer than it once was. Spills are a common sign of dementia - the person lacks the follow-through to clean up after a mess. Or your loved one may have physical limitations and simply need more housekeeping help. Clutter and grime in the bathroom. Often those who make an extra effort to tidy for guests in main rooms neglect the bathroom, where a truer picture of how the person is keeping up with things may be reflected. Signs that your loved one has cut back on activities and interests.

Is a hobby area abandoned? Are there no longer engagements written on the hall calendar? There are many reasons people cut back, but dropping out of everything and showing interest in almost nothing is a red flag for depression.

6. NOTICE HOW THE OTHER LIVING THINGS ARE FARING Look for: Plants that are dying, dead, or just gone.

How well other life is looked after may reflect how well your parents can look after their own lives.

YOU CAN’T BUY HAPPINESS...

But Living at Saint Ann is Pretty Much the Same Thing!

Join us — Holiday Market & Health Fair Saturday, November 12th • 10 am – 3 pm

Assisted & Independent Living Amenities & Services • No Buy-In. Just a Month-to-Month Agreement • All-Inclusive & Affordable Luxury • Numerous Activities & Outings • Great Food & Restaurant Style Dining • People of All Faiths Are Welcome • Salon with Pedicure Spa • New Assisted Living Care Levels Added • Pet Friendly • Respite Care 7501 W. Britton Rd. • Oklahoma City, OK 73132

405.721.0747, Ext. 322

SaintAnnRetirementCenter.com Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

33

Animals that don’t seem well tended. Watch out for dogs with long nails, cat litter boxes that aren’t changed routinely, dead fish in the fish tank, or any animal that seems underfed or poorly groomed.

7. WALK AROUND THE GROUNDS Look for: Signs of home maintenance problems.

Look for discolored siding or ceilings that might indicate a leak, gutters choked with leaves, broken windows or fences. Newspapers in the bushes.

Check for papers that were delivered but ignored.

Mail piled up in the mailbox. Watch for this indication that your loved one doesn’t even retrieve it regularly.

8. ASK EYEWITNESSES: TALK TO THOSE IN YOUR LOVED ONE’S CIRCLE Look for: Stories that reflect your loved one doesn’t get out much. “We don’t see her much lately.” “She doesn’t call anymore.” “She quit bridge club.” Stories that reflect that your loved one has

34

CAREGIVER Magazine

complained about health or needs extra assistance getting basic chores done. “Has he had that heart test yet?” “We were worried the day the ambulance came.” Hints of concern in their voices. Listen for comments about your loved one - about his or her health, pets, anything.

Most aging adults express their wish to “age in place” however aging at home without any assistance is rare as care needs increase. If you need help with available options of care and assistance make sure to attend our Better With Age Fun Days we host throughout the year. You will meet the best senior care experts in our area, in person and get all your questions answered in one day. You’ll have a lot of fun in the process. Our advertisers are trusted and valued experts in their respective fields of care they will gladly answer your questions. You can also reach LaShanya Nash at 405-532-6057 or Lisa Sydnor at 405-314-7840 we are here to provide options and support for caregivers and care receivers.

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

35

No matter where you are in life.

HOSPICE Health

WE’RE HERE TO HELP.

Valir Hospice allowed us to spend our days living life to the fullest.

FREEDOM FREEDOM 36

CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

ITS NOT ABOUT DYING...

ITS ABOUT LIVING!

HOSPICE

405-609-3636

What is hospice?

Hospice is not a place but a concept. Its goal is to neither hasten nor postpone death, but to offer compassionate care to those patients for whom curative measures are no longer an option. Hospice provides terminally ill patients and their families with customized medical care and pain management, as well as emotional and spiritual support.

Providing The Best Care Until The End

Most hospice patients receive care in their own homes or in the homes of loved ones. Hospice care may also be delivered to patients in nursing homes, hospitals, assisted-living facilities and independent-living facilities.

Typically, one family member serves as the primary caregiver and, when appropriate, helps make decisions for the patient. Valir provides care and support for both the patient and family.

(405) 609-3636

FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT VALIR.COM

Personal and Warm End-of-Life Care.

Valir Hospice Care is a family of dedicated professionals who care for terminally ill patients, providing them and their families with physical, psychological, social and spiritual support. Using individualized pain- and symptom-management plans, our hospice team works to enhance the patient’s quality of life.

Commensurate with our belief that life should be lived with dignity and respect, Valir’s hospice professionals provide patients with the compassion and care they deserve.

When is the right time to ask about hospice?

Now is the right time to learn more about hospice care. Although end-oflife care may be difficult to discuss, knowing our loved ones’ wishes now can greatly ease their transition into this stage of life.

The staff at Valir Hospice Care is happy to provide patients and their families with the information necessary to make educated decisions. Please call us at:

(405) 609-3636 FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT VALIR.COM

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

37

Hats for History

By Jessie Newel

Hats For History is a very unique project in Oklahoma to provide new military hats to our veterans with a twist. The hats are bought with donations from across the state from private citizens and businesses. The twist is that the hats will visit classrooms FIRST where teachers will use the hats for history/civics lessons.

The goal is to connect students across the state to our veterans. The students will use the hats as a starting point to research the veteran behind the hat. When the project is complete in the classroom, the hats will be delivered to the veteran on field trips scheduled by the teacher.

38

CAREGIVER Magazine

Lessons will include learning the branches of military and the differences between those branches. The students will learn about medals and how those medals are earned. Students in middle school and up will research battles fought by the veteran. All students will practice shaking hands and thanking veterans for their service.

Students will write research papers, thank you cards and letters and hand-deliver them with the hats to the veterans in person.

The objective is to build a bridge between students (of all ages) with veterans. This will promote a love for history and civics, respect for military

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Shopping List Due by November 30th

Christmas Bags For Veterans

What is in a COMPLETED bag?

Twin Blanket PJ Bottoms and/or sweatpants 3 white T-shirts Socks 2 Crossword Puzzle Books Calendar (DollarTree) FULL SIZE Toiletries Razors Shaving Cream 3 in 1 Body Wash/Shampoo Toothpaste & Toothbrush Deodorant Lotion Chapstick Comb/Brush Set AXE body spray

Contact Jessie Newell

at (405) 214-8633 Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

39

service, and awareness of what freedom means and the sacrifice that keeps freedom alive and well in the USA. Teachers that have participated in projects like this report that students become more engaged in school.

Teachers also say they notice students seem more respectful after engaging in these types of activities.

Teachers also find that children that struggle in school behavior-wise, almost always engage and show piqued interest in veteran-related projects.

This is a win for our veterans. There’s nothing a veteran loves more than knowing patriotism is alive and well.

Oklahoma VA Centers have noticed that classrooms that participate in projects like Hats For History usually turn to participate in other projects. For more information contact: Jessie Newell at 405-214-8633.

BE A HERO

*NO CAPE NEEDED Volunteer your time!

405.698.1313 Kevin Y., Volunteer Driver A proud partner of:

33 West 15th St., Edmond, OK 73013 CAREGIVER Magazine

Become a volunteer driver with the RSVP of Central Oklahoma Provide-A-Ride Team! ► Take older adults to medical appointments ► Volunteer 2 rides per month (6 hours total) ► Mileage compensation ► Discover how much joy it brings to give back!

Contact us today to join our team!

khloeskonfections.com orders@khloeskonfections.com 40

est.

h

Blessed W it

e Sweet Tou h T c h

405-605-3110

WWW.RSVPOKC.ORG Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Donna will always put Families First.

(405) 716-3043

Donna Rice-Johnson, Wife, Mother, and Retired School Teacher is the Leader we need now. As a retired schoolteacher, Donna knows how to fix our education Donna.R@donnaforfamilies.com system. As a mathematician, she knows how to make the www.donnaforfamilies.com numbers add up and boost our state's economy. As a mother and caretaker, she knows that families are the C l a i m y o u r F R E E d foundation i g i t a l s u b s c r i p of t i o n our a t C acommunities, r e g i v e r O k l a h o m a .state com and nation.

41

very young age if we needed anything to always come to her side of the bed and wake her up. “Never touch Daddy when he is sleeping.”, she would whisper to us.

We never slept with any lights on in the house, not even a night light he wanted his vision adjusted to the dark. There was no camping, well let me rephrase that, he was not camping. He always commented, “I camped for 13 months in the jungles of Southeast Asia and I like hot showers and clean sheets.” No Fireworks shows. He would tell us, “If anything is coming out of a mortar tube it is going to be by me and we are not going to be in a mob of people with TNT being shot at us.”

I know Daddy struggled to keep grounded and stay centered when I was young. My Mother, Irene, stood by him and helped him through some really tough times. By the time my younger siblings were born many of his demons from the war, he had locked back into Pandora’s box. I always hoped Daddy would talk to someone at the VA or join a support group but that was not something he ever did. He had his own ways of processing he watched Vietnam War movies or looked through picture albums of photos he took from Vietnam and then would go on a walk or saddle a horse and ride to be by himself. He read his bible every night. He dotted over us children and was a very loving, present father. We knew as his children we were the most important thing in our parents’ lives we were always loved unconditionally, and it doesn’t get any better than that.

all american boy

By LaShanya Nash

I was born in 1971 less than two years after Daddy came home from Vietnam. This post-Vietnam man was all I ever knew. Being raised by a battled hardened combat soldier seemed perfectly normal and average.

I came to realize it was not the same experience my school friends had with their fathers who had not been to Vietnam and seen combat.

My younger sister and I had a conversation recently about the movie Sergeant York which was one of his favorite movies and he enjoyed watching it with us kids. In case you are not familiar with the old blackand-white flick about a young conscientious objector, played by Gary Cooper, who is called to war in service of his country in WW1. The internal battle he was fighting with himself played out on the screen swirled together with the external battle, he was fighting with the enemy. That was my Daddy’s message to us kids.

He did what he was called to do. He did what he had to do to survive as a Heavy Weapons Platoon Leader, 1st Infantry Division, “The Big Red One” in the Vietnam War during the end of the Tet Offensive.

There are a few things that all children of combat vets have in common. First and foremost, you never startle them when they’re sleeping. Mother told us from a

I am very proud of Daddy’s service to our country.

As the daughter of a Veteran, I saw every day what he sacrificed for our Country. I now realize that all

As a young girl, I knew my Dad was the greatest hero to ever live. Like James Dean, John Wayne, and Lee Marvin all rolled into one superhuman. Just like all Daddy’s girls before me, I know without a doubt my Daddy was the best.

42

CAREGIVER Magazine

Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com

Americans have a little piece of the heart and soul of the men and women who have served our country.

Whether we respect and honor their sacrifice or are apathetic and disrespectful is a personal choice but they still served to allow all Americans the freedom and Constitutional protections we should hold dear.

He sacrificed many things but definitely his youth and his innocence to protect our freedoms. We as Americans enjoy a way of life like no other country in the world because of the sacrifices of military men and women both past and present.

The autumn of the year always makes me think of my Daddy, Ollie Gail Brown, everyone called him Gail. Late fall is when he got sick with a very fast and aggressive inoperable form of cancer. It is when he passed and when we buried him on Veteran’s Day 2016. It was a befitting day for him to be laid to rest under a flag-draped coffin with taps being played.

With everyone he loved and who loved him close by. The weather was as pleasant and sunny as his personality. I often think about my Dad and wonder what it would have been like to know him before Vietnam. I’ve seen pictures and heard stories of him as a boy and young man, he was the “all-American boy.” I have included a photo of him right before he

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

43

went to Vietnam, his younger brother playing his guitar and the look on my Daddy’s face I can only imagine was the collective American expression and cumulation of anxiety that all young men his age at the time was feeling.

Six years ago, as the soldier in uniform handed the folded flag from atop his coffin to my 90-yearold paternal Grandmother, she turned to me and whispered, “I expected to get this years ago. I never thought he would make it home from Vietnam.”

Many Soldiers don’t make it home and many who do, have tremendous difficulty adjusting once they come home. A major and preventable crisis in America is suicide. Tragically, Veterans comprise almost a quarter of all suicide deaths in the United States at a rate of 1.5 times higher than the general population.

Veterans who abuse drugs or alcohol are over twice as likely to die by suicide than other veterans. Suicide rates are extremely high among older veterans According to the VA, in 2016, about 58% of all veterans who committed suicide were Veterans aged 55 years or older.

Giving New Meaning To Life!

If maintaining independence is key - you can continue to thrive and socialize with an amazing group of senior adults.

If personal care assistance is needed - our staff can help you live a healthier lifestyle.

If you are caring for someone with Alzheimer's or another type of dementia, we specialize in caring for those who are walking the journey with a dementia causing disease.

Assisted Living and Memory Care

Arbor House is about personal freedom and choices. We pride ourselves in providing high quality service in a comfortable, secure environment.

Arbor House of Norman (405) 292-9200 4501 W Main St, Norman, OK 73072 Reminisce Center of Norman (405) 310-2499 151 48th Ave SW Norman, OK 73072 Arbor House Midwest City (405) 455-3900 9240 E. Reno Ave. Midwest City, OK 73130 Arbor House of Mustang (405) 376-2872 850 N. Clearsprings Rd. Mustang, OK 73064

44

CAREGIVER Magazine

Let Our Family Take Care of Yours www.integrityseniorcareokc.com

Bathing - Dressing Meal Preparation Respite Care Home Health Care Alzheimer's Care Errands Hospice Light Housekeeping Medication Reminders

"Integrity Senior Care treated Mom with the utmost respect! The staff is very caring, efficient and treated her like family and gave me peace of mind! I couldn't thank the caregiver's enough for all their hard work and generosity. I would recommend Integrity Senior Care to anyone. " Judith Crain

11212 N. May Ave, Suite 207 OKC, OK 73013

Issue 23

(405)810-5128

CaregiverOklahoma.com

I would like to encourage you to begin walking up and thanking our Military Men and Women.

Let our Veterans know they are appreciated. Our Vietnam Veterans, many of whom were drafted, did not receive the welcome home they deserved.

Their physical and emotional scars of war were only magnified by the mood of many in our country.

The hatred of the war was directed at them personally. It is one of the darkest chapters in our American history.

If you served and you know someone in your unit is having a hard time adjusting reach out to them. If you are a military spouse and you know your husband or wife is in a dark place seek help. If you are thinking of harming yourself please call The Veterans Crisis Line. The number is new and provides easier and faster assistance. You don’t have to be enrolled in VA benefits or health care to connect. To call, Dial 988 then Press 1. Chat online at VeteransCrisisLine.net/ Chat or Text 838255.

In Loving Memory of my Daddy, Ollie Gail Brown, January 7, 1947 - November 7, 2016

Claim your FREE digital subscription at CaregiverOklahoma.com

45

Remember When...

By Angela Blake

Remember when The kids’ table was set up in the other room so the adults could enjoy a kid-free dinner?

Remember when All the women of the family would get together and make so many pies there wasn’t room to put anymore out, yet we managed to eat every bite before Thanksgiving was over.

Remember when You and your cousins spent hours deciding who would ask to stay over at the others house after the day was over.

46 Magazine CAREGIVER Magazine 4 6CAREGIVER

Issue 23 Issue 23

CaregiverOklahoma.com CaregiverOklahoma.com

Remember when You planned your morning around watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade every year without fail?

Remember when All of the children would find board games to play while the men pretended to watch the ball game while they were actually sleeping on the sofa?

Remember when The best part of the day was sitting down with extended family and eating much more than you thought possible while simply enjoying being together? h oa m com C l aCi lma i ymo uy ro uF rR EF R E EdEi gdi itga il t as lu bs su cb rsi cprtiipotni oant aCta rCeagr ievgei rvOe kr O l akhl oa m . cao. m

47 47

45 YEARS OF Combined Experience

Preserving your health, wealth, and the freedom to live life the way you choose!

EUNICE EUNICE KHOURY KHOURY

Host of of Host Well Preserved Preserved Well Radio Show Show Radio on KTOK KTOK on 48

4 Medicare Options 4 Long-Term Care 4 Retirement Options 4 Life Insurance Make Your Appointment TODAY! Make Your Appointment TODAY!

405.848.5790 405.848.5790 Before Before

After After

4800 N. Mayfair Dr. • OKC, OK, 73112 | www.wellpreser vedadvisor y.com 4800 N. Magazine Mayfair Dr. • OKC, OK, 73112 | Issue www.wellpreser y.com CAREGIVER 23 vedadvisor

CaregiverOklahoma.com