z 40 ROCK Quarterly Magazine Issue No. 7
Gents: Know Your Worth TOO
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THE JONES’ DON’T CARE! by Charlotte Stallings
Do you know anyone who doesn’t just want to keep up with the Jones’, but their goal is to obliterate them?
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Maybe they have to be the first person on the block (or in the office) to have the latest gadget or tech toy loaded with apps that they’ll neverunderstand or use. Or they buy the newest cell phone at full price even though their current one is less than six months old. Maybe they wouldn’t be caught dead (even in the grocery store) dressed in anything but designer threads from head-to-toe, or they change cars like they change clothes — which is often.
We spend lots of time standing on the
HERE’S WHAT LURES ME:
outside-looking-in at people who seem
When I made my list, I realized that there can be a strong external pull through the efforts of skillful marketers. Product manufacturers wear us down with non-stop television commercials and pop-up ads on our computers, tablets and cell phones that tout all kinds of things, like ...
to have it all, not realizing that the Jones’ have their own issues and challenges and really don’t care whether you keep up with them or not! If your motivation is to keep up with others rather than keeping your goals in front of you, you likely won’t be successful at either.
Comparing ourselves to others can
be financial sabotage and the culprit behind a lot of unnecessary debt and wasteful purchasing. Instead, compare yourself to how close you are to achieving your own personal financial goals. I wish someone had told me to focus on my own goals and not my neighbor’s, or
“No Charlotte, I don’t know anyone
co-worker’s, or friend’s lifestyle.
› New styles, colors and fashion trends that leap off magazine covers every season. ›G litzy new technology and games launched several times a year (and we wait in line for hours to buy them). ›N ew Jordan’s released almost monthly it seems. ›A nd those blasted Groupon and Living Social deals that cram our inboxes all day, every day!
like this, in fact this sounds kind of exag-
gerated and extreme if you ask me.” Ex-
find its way into our lives?
treme? Maybe. Real-world? Absolutely!
The truth is many people live their lives
in our world today it is incredibly easy
this way. In their hearts and minds they
to get sucked into living beyond our
all on marketing, we play a part in this
say, “Look at me! I’ve got it! I’m the best!
means. If you have both hands high in
too. Have you ever rationalized and said,
I’m first to have it!” But sadly, if you follow
the air, you and I are on the same page.
“I work really hard, I deserve to have this.
them to the bank, being first and best, has
Do me a favor — take a few minutes to
Heck, I’ve earned it and I’m going to get
caused them to be broke and busted.
think about, and list, all of the ways you
it!” That my friend is the exact kind of
can be lured into spending more and
internal dialogue that nurtures and fans
mon for those of us (yes, me too…been
more of your hard-earned paycheck
the flames of a desire mentality.
there; done that) who struggle with
each month.
an affliction I call the desire mentality.
a man who lives in the “now and today,”
Keeping up with the Jones’ is com-
So how does this desire mentality
›N ew car models rolling out every year.
Raise your hand if you agree that
What did you come up with?
But not so quick! We can’t blame it
My girlfriend, Monica, is married to
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GET STARTED
☞
and while he’s taught her to live more in
ment of a problem is the first step in
the present, his excessive, gotta-have-it-
turning things around…and that’s what
right-now, “The fellas are gonna like this,”
they did.
spending has, on several occasions, delayed and prevented them from reaching their goals. For instance, after deciding to save for a trip overseas, Monica says that her husband drove up to the house one afternoon in a new car that he de-
Consumer Credit Counseling www.consumercredit.com National Foundation for Credit Counseling www.nfcc.org/ Money Management International www.moneymanagement.org Each of these links to consumer
LESSON
credit/financial counseling can get
If you continue to feed into the desire
you started on a path of change,
mentality mindset, you won’t get where you want to be; instead, you’ll remain stuck where you are.
and lead you to a more solid future. Your bank, credit union and local Chamber of Commerce may also be able to provide names and
cided in the space of 20 minutes to buy.
HIT REFRESH
numbers of professional budget-
I’ll let you imagine her reaction.
Are you making a good salary but find
ing and debt counselors. And
yourself cash poor? Do you find it neces-
certainly do an online search of
because of pride, appearance or an
sary to make essential purchases on
credit and debt counselors in your
insatiable desire, ask yourself, “What am
credit cards because you don’t have the
area to find more resources.
I taking away from to pay for this?” It
money in the bank? Do you buy clothes
could be your retirement savings, educa-
or gadgets for the prestige or bragging
tion for your kids, your mortgage, or that
rights of having the latest and greatest?
You will do yourself, your spouse and your
dream vacation. You could also be taking
Do you feel compelled to keep up with
family a favor by admitting that there’s a
away precious time from your family
others, even when you can’t afford to? If
problem. Get the help and begin to live
because you’re working more to make
so, like Monica and her husband, you’re
within your means. You’ll be surprised at
up the difference. I wish someone had
likely living beyond your means.
how peaceful you feel! ✖
told me that living within my means is
a good thing.
reveal their true financial situation. But
by learning to face the reality of your
When you pay for something
Eventually Monica and her husband
Many people are prideful and won’t
realized that not only were they not
situation, you can find ways to get off of
saving, they were in the red every month
the desire mentality treadmill. Few things
because they were living beyond their
create more stress in a relationship than a
means. They came to me for advice and
lack of control in spending. Over-extending
I sent them to a professional debt coun-
yourself based on your pride or momen-
selor. I know Monica well and it took a
tary impulses can destroy your bank
lot for her and her husband to admit that
account and your relationships. Break
they were struggling. But acknowledge-
down and ask for help if you need it!
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Charlotte Stallings is a Financial and Personal Accountability Expert.
f TALK TO ME: Are you able to keep your financial focus in the face of other people’s material displays? How is your power holding up? I want to know. @CharStallingsFacebook.com/iwishbook
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Catering At Its Best by Sandra Wyckoff Will you agree food should look as beautiful as it tastes. And it does. 40z Rock had the pleasure of selecting Exspensive Taste Catering and CJ’s Masterpiece as two of the industry’s best kept secrets. These two are known for catering events that delivers to you a modern, worry-free experience, delicious food, impeccable service, and artistic presentation.
the eats
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› Caterer / Cj’s Masterpiece by CJ Johnson:
It’s not just about cooking It’s a work of Art! When Planning the perfect event, look no futher than us. Food lovers beware—you’re in for a Taste of Elegance. Food is my passion — my art is creating delicious masterpieces and Out Of The Box Atmosphere that overwhelm and leave your guest wanting for more. Photos by / Bobby B Photos
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