Your Voice. Your Community. Your News.
Yes We Can
Volume 6 Issue 8
Serving the Inland Empire Communities
Beware of this app that your kids may be using that could cost them their lives. Page 2
News and notes for the men and women who give so much to protect our nation. Page 6
8 Important Strategies for Raising Children in a World of Technology
Page 8
Some ideas to Help at Home keep the kids calm. Page 5
Winter is Here!
Time for Cornbread and Chili Anytime you put the words “Southern” in front of a dish, it’s likely to stir up controversy, and cornbread is no exception. It seems like every person I’ve ever known from the South has their favorite way of making it, and every way is different. The thing that distinguishes Southern cornbread from any other cornbread, is that it is savory, not sweet, and it is made mostly with cornmeal. Northern cornbread tend to be more cake-like, on the sweet side, with a finer crumb due to more flour in the mixture. Southern cornbread is flavored with bacon grease, and cooked in a cast iron skillet, a perfect side for barbecues, or chili. Whether to include sugar or not in a southern cornbread recipe is an issue for debate. The choice is yours as to whether or not to include it. Bacon drippings and butter makes it, the butter adds needed richness to the bread itself, and the bacon drippings help brown the crust and will keep it from sticking to the skillet, also it will cook more quickly. Southern Cornbread Recipe • Prep time: 15 minutes • Cook time: 20 minutes • Yield: Makes 8 servings White or yellow cornmeal it’s your choice, white is more Southern.
INGREDIENTS • • • • • • • •
1 Tbsp bacon drippings 2 cups cornmeal OR 1 1/2 cups cornmeal and 1/2 cup flour 2 teaspoons baking soda 1 teaspoon salt 1 Tbsp sugar (optional) 1 egg (optional) 1 1/4 cups buttermilk 6 Tbsp unsalted butter, melted
HelpYour Teen Learn to Drive
Learning any new skill can be intimidating, especially for a young mind. There are many reasons that teenagers are fearful of learning how to drive. Not having any experience with driving a car
Fear of doing something wrong and getting hurt is ever so in their minds. The fear of forgetting how to drive in general while behind the wheel. When there are other drivers on the road there is fear of not being able to keep up with them. There is fear of making wrong turns or getting lost and fears of past accidents. These are very common and valid fears for a teenager. Parent must remember that while these fears may seem trivial, they are very real and very large to their child.
INSTRUCTIONS
1 Preheat pan with bacon drippings: Put the bacon drippings in a 9 or 10-inch cast iron skillet and put the skillet into the oven. Preheat the oven to 400° with the skillet inside. (If you don’t have an iron skillet, you can use an uncovered Dutch oven or a metal cake pan.) 2 Make the batter: Whisk together all the dry ingredients (cornmeal, baking soda, salt, sugar if using) in a large bowl. In another bowl, beat the egg (if using) and buttermilk until combined, then mix that into the bowl of dry ingredients. Stir in the melted butter. 3 Pour batter into hot skillet and bake: When the oven is hot, take out the skillet (carefully, as the handle will be hot!). Add the cornbread batter and make sure it is evenly distributed in the skillet. Bake at 400°F for about 20 minutes, or until the edges are beginning to brown and a toothpick inserted in the center of the bread comes out clean. 4 Rest bread in skillet, then serve: Let the bread rest for 10-30 minutes in the skillet before cutting it into wedges and serving.
On the other hand there are children whose parents have allowed them to drive their car around on their property. These kids may not have any fears about getting their driver’s license because of those experiences. For those with not experience consider this; you are getting into a machine that you have no idea how to operate. What you do know is that it can kill you if you make a wrong move. For a teenager with no driving experience, the thought of operating a vehicle on the open road with other drivers is also another source of fear and anxiety. They may ask themselves “What if I make a wrong turn? What if I don’t hit my brakes in time?” What you, as a parent can do to help is to allow your teenager to take baby steps. Help them to study for their driving test. It will help to take them out during quit drive times this will help them feel more comfortable behind the wheel. Enrolling them in driver’s education program at school or hire a private driving instructor will also help. Last but not least stop and talk about mistakes. Do not force them to learn or to take steps they are not ready for. Being agitated with them; yelling at them; making fun of their fears; overloading them with instruction is not good, teach one thing at a time then
move forward. Do not have them drive in heavy traffic or in highly populated areas. The parent who takes time to calmly teach the teenager is the helping parent. Be encouraging and help them to prepare for their permit test. Allow them to feel scared while still building their confidence in themselves and their ability to master driving. The best places are empty parking lots or quiet, low populated neighborhoods. These types of places can take some of the pressure off of the new driver. If or when a mistake is made, pull over and talk about it. Help them to see what they did incorrectly using a positive tone. The parent who screams and yells during driving lessons is the parent who is causing harm. Do not get in the car with your teenager while you are angry or agitated. Any negative energy or feedback will simply reinforce their fears. Do not put them in heavy traffic and expect them to sink or swim. This could be deadly. Most of all, do not make fun of your child’s fear of learning how to drive. Teasing and belittling is never an effective way to teach anyone anything. Communication is key when teaching anything. If you see something that is not right, tell your child in a calm and encouraging way. Make sure that YOU are alert when going out on the road with your teenager. You are the experienced one and must look out for what they are or are not doing correctly. Stay as calm as possible. If your teenager sees or feels your anxiety they will be more prone to make mistakes or decide that they would rather not drive at that moment. For a teenager, becoming a licensed driver is a rite of passage. Do not let them miss this important milestone in their lives because of fear! Good luck and safe driving.
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Teens
working, school work, cleaning but they can’t put down those technology gadgets. The list actually goes on in what I am seeing, have heard, and have great concern when it comes to our young people. It’s been two years now that my husband Daniel and I have been involved in our outreach “Loving On Our Youth.” The past two years have been wonderful in that we have been able to touch so many young people’s lives. We have had the opportunity to tell many of them that they have greatness inside of them and that they can do anything they set their minds to do. I thank God Almighty for parents that are loving and caring for their children the best way they know how. I know its not easy raising children today; I know that there are so many obstacles that take away our young people’s focus. It’s still true it does take a village to raise one child, but in these days it’s sad to say “people do not want others saying anything to their children.” This has caused a problem in raising our children because it empowers the child to keep doing whatever they want to do, trust me there are still wonderful loving people that want the best for our children and it’s okay to let such people help out. This year Loving On Our Youth has had three Events, several group meetings and Our First Annual Loving On Our Youth Family Explosion Day where hundreds of children and youth were involved. It was as an Old Fashion Explosion Recreation Day for the whole family to come together and love on our children and youth. We are in the process of starting a “Youth Talk About Whatever” to give them an opportunity to communicate with us and give us information on what we need to do as parent and what they need to do as our children. Take time and involve your children we Love them and want the best for them. Call me 909-278-7046.
Publishers Note Ethel Martin-Miller
This month I like to share with my readers my feelings, focus, and passion toward the children and youth of today. I want all of you to know how I have taken a position to help, guide, and love and assist as many children and young people as I can. So many of our children need encouragement. Many are in Foster Care; many are living in homes where there is very little guidance; not to mention homes where there is only one parent doing their best to make ends meet. There are many children that are obedience trying to do what is expected and they need to know that we are proud of them as far as school and obeying their parent. Our children have been born in the Technology Era and that’s a good thing, but parent please help them to have their chance to enjoy being a child and understanding the important to know that they are children. I have had countless youth share with me that they see too much, hear too much, and now they find themselves acting out what those surrounding are. I’ve had young people tell me they are upset with themselves because they have wasted so much time on the internet, they could of being doing something worthwhile, like
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By Ethel Martin-Miller I viewed a very disturbing program on television this past weekend, which has prompted me to write this article. The program reflected on the lives of two families with several children, each family had a teenage girl that had downloaded the app Kik. One young girl lived to tell her story and the other one unfortunately was murdered by two individuals that chatted with her on Kik. First of all parents if you’re paying the monthly bill for your child’s cellphone, then know what they are doing, if you don’t know their users names and passwords, you haven’t a clue of what might be going on in their lives. The one thing that I tell those around me is that the Internet has terrible people also using it and will harm you in all kinds of different ways. You have to treat and think of the internet the same way you think about all the crime that goes on in our communities. Kik sounds like a commercial for a sugary cereal – Kik for Kids! But it is far from that. Messenger is a free texting app available for iPhones, Android, Windows, and Blackberry phones. Remember, you don’t need a phone to use iPhone apps; if your child has an iPod touch or an iPad, they can install iPhone apps. Kik is just one of many free texting apps available in the App store. Take a look –Some people blatantly use Kik to send and receive nude pictures. Some call it sexting. Others call it child pornography. I call it creepy. Go on the Internet for yourself and read the reviews, get educated and know what is happening via the Internet when it involves your children. While I’m sure that many people use Kik to simply send messages to friends, the fact that it is very popular for sexting leads me to believe it is not a good choice for kids. Given that there are many other free texting apps available, including iMessage which is already included for iPod touch, I don’t see a need for Kik on a child’s mobile device. Kik is for 18+ but still know what’s going on in your child’s life.
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Let’s All Conserve Conserve Help Us Energy This Summer Summe r Because of the limited availability of natural gas at the Aliso Canyon storage facility there’s less natural gas locally to produce electricity. That’s why we need your help to conserve energy and reduce the risk of power outages this summer. Please help reduce energy use: • Turn off all unnecessary lights. • Set your air conditioning to 78° or higher. • Delay the use of any major appliances until after 9:00 p.m. Thanks for helping conserve!
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KEISHA N. BROWN NAMED EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT AND CHAIR OF HEALTH AND WELLNESS PRACTICE
THE WORD
Devotional: A Trail of Ants
By Faithe Thomas
While visiting with friends, I noticed a trail of ants marching through the maze of wicker and bamboo furniture. I wondered how each ant knew where the previous ant had been. I guessed that they, like Hansel and Gretel, left a trail to be followed. If so, their trail was not visible to human eyes. I decided to test my theory. I rubbed my finger across their path at one point and then waited to see what would happen. Sure enough, when the next ant came to that point, it was at a loss for which way to go! It spent some time wandering around until it discovered the other side of the trail. As another ant approached, it, too, was confused as to where to go, but it somehow managed to follow most of the wanderings of the previous ant and found the original trail again. I also walk on a path, one forged by Jesus Christ. Philippians 2:5-16 points me in the right direction. To follow Christ I must have the same attitudes that He had. I need to put others first by thinking of myself as their servant. Philippians 2:14-15 shows me how I stray from following Christ. When I grumble and complain my attitudes do not reflect those found in Christ. At that point, I have stopped imitating Him and stepped off the trail. That sin has the same result as my finger did when I rubbed it across the path of the ants. Paul encourages me in verse 16 to “prove to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you appear as lights in the world.” To follow the correct path I need to mirror the attitudes of Christ and guide others along the trail by encouraging them to fix their eyes on Him. About the Author Faithe Finley Thomas lived as a missionary in Ghana, West Africa for six years. Her book “Staying in the Breeze” is a thoughtful reflection of some of her experiences. It can be purchased through Master Design.
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LAGRANT COMMUNICATIONS (LC), a multicultural integrated marketing communications agency, announces the promotion of Keisha N. Brown (KB) to executive vice president and chair of the new Health and Wellness Practice. As chair of the practice, KB will drive creative solutions for all of the agency’s healthcare clients. With more than two decades of healthcare experience working with clients on a local, regional and national level, LC is excited to launch their Health and Wellness Practice with a skilled professional that works across all disciplines and cultures. “I look forward to leading the new Health and Wellness Practice at the agency and utilizing my experience and passion to make a difference in the lives of African Americans and Latinos,” said KB. “I have worked on health care accounts for more than 20 years, and understand the challenges that impact behavioral change to make our communities healthier and people live longer.” KB brings a wealth of experience, insight and maturity to the Health and Wellness Practice. She has developed award winning campaigns for corporate, notfor-profit and government clients, including American Cancer Society, Robert Wood Johnson Foundation (RWJF), Novartis and the Office of National Control Drug Policy, to name a few. She now manages the advertising and marketing account for Covered California, educating African American consumers about their services and maximizing the number of Californians enrolled in health insurance coverage. In addition, under KB’s leadership the team will focus on entities such as hospitals, healthcare plans, notfor-profit, government, biotechnology and pharmaceutical companies “KB is the biggest success story of the agency’s internship program,” said Mr. Kim L. Hunter, President and CEO of LAGRANT COMMUNICATIONS. “She is the epitome of what an IMC specialist is and does. KB is one of the few communicators that has a good understanding of the three disciplines (advertising, marketing and public relations) and how they intersect with one another to create a truly holistic campaign.” As a 21-year veteran of the firm, KB is an integrated marketing communications specialist that has successfully executed integrated advertising, marketing and public relations campaigns for clients such as L.A. Care Health Plan, The Los Angeles County Department of Public Health and the Martin Luther King Jr., Community Hospital. Throughout her career, KB has been recognized for her work and expertise in multicultural communications. Most recently, the firm received the Healthcare Public Relations & Marketing Association (HPRMA) Golden Advocate Award for the launch of the L.A. Care Covered Campaign, a project headed by KB. Johnson Publications, the publishers of Ebony and Jet magazine, also named KB “One of the Most Outstanding Women in Marketing and Communications” and PRWeek Magazine featured her in a roundtable discussion regarding diverse viewpoints on multicultural communications.
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Steer clear of situations which bring about frustration. Adults child proof the environment lead them not into temptation. Little children do not do things on purpose until they become older and can think if I do this then this will happen. Children are impulsive they do not identify consequences until something happens with an adult to guide them they will not be able to understand the situation. If children write on walls they should wash the walls and be shown that paper is for writing on. If children break something they should By Joanna Payne-Jones Ph.D. learn that it must be paid for and replaced. How does a child do this? The parent will help. If a child makes a mess it should be cleaned better yet the adult should set up the environment to prevent messes and insure an easy clean up. If a child gets frustrated or angry the adult can provided behavior to deal with these feelings rather than have the child throw something or break it. Anger management needs to begin at an early age. Punishment has no place in child rearing. Direct consequences of an action reinforce expected behavior. However the adult must be specific about what behavior is expected for the child. You can run outside but need to walk inside. You can play with these toys, but you can’t touch my
Community
vases. My vases are easy to break. I will be upset if my vases are broken. Please don’t touch them. Thank you for being so considerate. Being with a child that is learning how to be thoughtful and polite is pleasurable. Parenting Tips: If your child seems not to be ready for kindergarten, don’t worry. Giving your child an extra year could be the best gift you could give. School should be fun and informative. How can you help? Read, read, and read with your child. Choose appropriate books and even the newspaper, the Child wants your attention and will enjoy reading with you; Turn off the TV set. TV may change the wring in the brain; if the child’s birthday is close to the kindergarten entrance date accepting the fact that time to develop and grow is the answer. Don’t give a message that not starting kindergarten is bad or the child has failed; Help your child become used to a school routine by going to pre-kindergarten; Do not push your child, but do present him/her with activities that will help him/her grow and develop. Use recorders and encourage your child to tell stories, jokes, etc. Have an art center in your home. Have paper, pencils, and colors available. Encourage your child to choose their own clothes and dress themselves. Limit the choices to what you can afford and what you think is appropriate. Encourage physical activities. Play ball, take walks and have a daily routine for exercise. Show your child how to cross the street safely but tell them never to do it alone. Count with your child. Let them set the table one plate for one person or chair; Play games with your child.; Make puzzles have a family time and do fun activities together.; Play Simon says and give simple directions.; find shapes in the environment and take pictures of them.; Play with colors and find the colors in your home and the outdoors. Stay up and see the stars. Stop and smell a flower. Go on a nature walk. Explore the body parts. Eyes to see, ears to hear etc. make up a game. Most of all value education and learning. Give the message that information is power. Work with you child’s teacher. Ask to see their lesson plans. Question them on what they are doing to help your child grow and develop. They should be teaching through planned and spontaneous play. Let your child enjoy each beautiful day and all that the day offers. Enjoy your child you will never get this moment back.
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Veteran Affairs & Information Yes We Can Newspaper is proud to announce the Veterans Affairs and Information to our Veterans, their families and the community at large. We want to thank our Veterans and hope that the stories, articles and information will be a help to them and their families.
2017 NATIONAL VETERANS GOLDEN AGE GAMES
The National Veterans Golden Age Games is the premier senior adaptive rehabilitation program in the United States, and the only national multi-event sports and recreational seniors’ competition program designed to improve the quality of life for all older Veterans, including those with a wide range of abilities and disabilities. The VA Challenges and encourages senior Veterans to be proactive in embracing a healthier lifestyle. The games are open to Veterans, ages 55 or older, who receive health care from the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Veterans all over the state can participate in the National Veterans Golden Age Games. The Inland Empire is encouraging our veterans to participate. The 2017 National Veterans Golden Games will be held on Sunday, May 7 – 11, 2017 in Biloxi, Mississippi. Sporting Events will included: Air Rifle/Singles, Badminton/ Singles, Doubles, Basketball/3-on-3 Half Court (Exhibition), Boccia/ Singles, Doubles , Ambulatory, Wheelchair, Bowling/ Singles, Ambulatory, Wheelchair and Visually Impaired Divisions, Cycling/5k, Disc Golf/ (Blind), Golf/18 -Hole Scratch Play, Horseshoes/ Singles, Ambulatory, Wheelchair and Visually Impaired Divisions, Nine Ball/ Singles, Ambulatory, Wheelchair Divisions, Pickelball/(Exhibition) Ambulatory, Wheelchair, Powerwalk/1/2 mile, 1 mile, Racquetball/(Exhibition), Rowing/ (Exhibition), Shuffleboard/ Singles, Ambulatory, Wheelchair and Visually Impaired Divisions, Swimming/ Backstroke: 25-, 50- Yard Freestyle: 25-, 50-Yard, Breaststroke 25- Yard, Table Tennis/ Singles, Ambulatory, Wheelchair Divisions, Track & Field/100, 200, 400, 800, 1500 Meter, Discus, Javelin and Shot Put. The competitions will be conducted in accordance with the rules of the organizations listed here. Air Rifle USA Shooting, Badminton-USA Badminton/Boccia-USA Boccia Bowling-United States of Bowling Congress Bowling/Wheelchair-American Wheelchair Bowling Association Bowling/Visually Impaired American Blind Bowling Association/Cycling-USA Cycling/FieldUSA Track & Field/Golf-United States Golf Association/Horseshoes-National Horseshoe Pitcher’s Association, Horseshoes Visually Impaired-United States Blind Horseshoe Pitchers Association/ Nine Ball-Billard Congress of America/Shuttleboard-National Shuffleboard Association/SwimmingUnited States Masters Swimming Inc/Table Tennis-USA. For more information contact: For questions regarding the NVGAG, please contact Jeanene LeSure or call (813) 903-4582
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PARTICIPANTS SOUGHT FOR SPONSORED VETERANS PROGRAM A $5,000 grant was recently awarded to Queen of Hearts Therapeutic Riding Center, Inc. by the Disabled Veterans National Foundation: The DVNF financial assistance will sponsor a series of individualized therapeutic riding sessions to veterans with disabilities. Queen of Hearts is now seeking local veterans with disabilities to fill the sponsored sessions. This grant addresses the need to serve veterans from all eras, active and reserve, who face mild to severe issues and disabilities such as: missing limbs; traumatic brain injury; paralysis; depression; and/or readapting to nonmilitary life after service. These conditions have been demonstrated as treatable through the horse-based activities and staff of the QoH Equine Services. More than 229,000 veterans live in the QoH service area: Of these, an estimated 26 percent, or nearly 61,000 veterans, have a disability. The families of these individuals may struggle with separation and recovery, as well. Therapeutic horseback riding has been proven to aid balance, core strength, physical fitness, build self-confidence, self-esteem, improve cognitive thinking and/or control impulsive behavior, to name a few experiences of the grant’s target population. The Jurupa Valley-based center is a premier-accredited center by the Professional Associational of Therapeutic Horsemanship International. Disabled veterans who are interested in the sponsored program are encouraged to call Executive Director Robin Kilcoyne at 951734-6300 to discuss suitability for the program. The instructors, board members and volunteers thank the Disabled Veterans National Foundation for the opportunity to serve more area veterans from active and reserve components, through this grant. More information about Queen of Hearts Therapeutic Riding Center Inc. is available at www.queenofheartsranch.com.
Yes We Can Newspaper Yes We Can Newspaper Staff Publisher: Ethel Martin-Miller Associate Copy Editor: Josephine Williams Distribution Manager: Daniel Miller Staff Photographer: Sharron Thompson
To Advertise Contact (909) 278-7046 ethelmiller@yeswecannewspaper.com Letters, Articles, Personals replies and comments appearing in the Yes We Can Newspaper reflect the opinions of the writers, and do not constitute an endorsement by the Yes We Can Newspaper or staff. Yes We Can Newspaper assumes no responsibility for articles, letters or press releases and unsolicited material. Decisions as to the editing and publishing of materials are on a space availability basis. All rights are reserved on materials accepted for publication unless otherwise specified.
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Raising our Kids
8 Important Strategies for Raising Children in a World of Technology By Jackie Baber
“We refuse to turn off our computers, turn off our phone, log off Facebook, and just sit in silence, because in those moments we might actually have to face up to who we really are.” —Jefferson Bethke We as parent have a unique struggle facing our generation of parents. Namely, how to raise children in an age of technology. Our generation, it seems, had the last of the truly low-tech childhoods, and now we are among the first of the truly high-tech parents. When it comes to parenting, is seems to be extremely uncomfortable for parents, due to the fact their childhood and adolescence were so different before the Internet. They seem to only understand parenting models from that era… Technology wins the prize for being the trickiest parenting challenge that we have to face. 1. Technology should not be discouraged Technology, it appears, is going to be around for quite a while. Our kids will need the skills in the future—they already do in the present. Our job is equipping them to use those tools properly. We should be active and intentional in teaching them how to use technology effectively and to its fullest potential. 2. Moderation is encouraged. While we know very little about the future of technology and how it might look, we do have ample study on the effects of screen time: Studies have shown that excessive media use can lead to attention problems, school difficulties, sleep and eating disorders, and obesity. Most recently, The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends television and other entertainment media should be avoided entirely for infants and children under age 2. For older kids, “To help them make wise media choices, parents should monitor their media diet for both duration and content.” When they are sitting in public places and on their devices or laptops, look over their shoulders, check text message histories and set parental controls. Be concerned about their cyber footprints. 3. Age restrictions on technology are an
appropriate guideline. The minimum age for Facebook / Instagram is 13 years old. While some kids under the age of 13 may be mature enough to use the networks wisely, there is a bigger issue at play—honesty. When we allow our children to misrepresent their age/identity solely for the purpose of gaining access, we set a dangerous precedent. 4. Technology is changing the way we relate to one another, but face-to-face conversation is still important in the present (and will likely be important in the future). Older generations will argue technology is destroying conversation, younger generations will argue technology is enhancing it. Only time will tell. But either way, our children will forever live in a world where their immediate elders (parents) respect and expect verbal conversation. Future generations may value it less. But in the meantime, for our children to be successful in communicating with older generations, they must be able to communicate both online and in-person. 5. Technology increases opportunity for distraction. From leaving present conversations, procrastinating important work, or losing the ability to selfreflect, technology represents an ever-present temptation to leave difficult places. Those who will succeed in the future will be the ones who learn to overcome this temptation. 6. Technology can be used for consumption or creation. Choose creation whenever possible. This is, perhaps, one of the most important distinctions concerning technology that we can teach our children. We can play
video games… or we can create them. We can browse Facebook… or we can create places and communities that serve a purpose. There is a place in our world for technological consumption— Help your children know the difference. 7. Your self-worth can not be calculated by likes and shares and retweets. The praise of others is a fickle thing upon which to measure our worth. It is a foolish, ever-changing target. It often negatively impacts the decisions we make and the life we choose to live, but it never fully satisfies our hearts or our souls. It is important for you and your kids to understand that self-worth must be found elsewhere. 8. You can’t believe everything you see on the Internet. The Internet could use more fact checkers—we post our most glorious moments online, but hide the most painful. We build a facade of happiness, success, and an image of having it all together. But inside, we are as lost and broken as the next person. Our online selves need more authenticity. And our children need to know the danger of comparing themselves to the rose-colored profiles created on social media.
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