FAMILY MATTERS
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Understanding Financial Infidelity and Its Effect on Relationships
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nfidelity and deception can take many forms in a relationship, including some that have nothing to do with romance at all. One example is financial infidelity, where deceptions are reported in nearly half of relationships where finances are combined. Among people who have combined finances with a partner, 2 in 5 (43%) confessed to committing an act of financial deception in a current or past relationship, according to a survey conducted by the National Endowment for Financial Education (NEFE). What’s more, 85% of those who reported a financial deception acknowledged the indiscretion affected the relationship in some way. “When you comingle finances in a relationship, you’re consenting to cooperation and transparency in your money management,” said Billy Hensley, Ph.D., president and CEO of NEFE. “Regardless of the severity of the act, financial deception can cause tremendous strain on couples – it leads to arguments, a breakdown of trust and, in some cases, separation or even divorce.”
bined finances said they feared disapproval by their partner given discussions of finances had already occurred while 27% feared disapproval by a partner in a relationship where discussions about finances had not yet occurred.
by one partner in a relationship where finances are combined. Examples include hiding purchases, money or accounts, or lying about the amount of income earned and debt owed. More than one-third (39%) of U.S. adults who have combined finances in a current or past relationship admitted to hiding a purchase, bank account, statement, bill or cash from their partner, and about 1 in 5 (21%) admitted to lying to a partner or spouse about finances, the amount of debt they owe or the amount of money they earn.
Understanding Financial Infidelity Financial infidelity is an act of deception
Reasons for Financial Deception A lack of communication and conflicting
life or financial values may often be the root causes of financial deception, but U.S. adults also revealed other reasons for deceit with money. More than onethird (38%) said even though they are in a committed relationship, they believe some aspects of their finances should remain private. Meanwhile, another 33% were embarrassed or fearful about their finances and didn’t want their partner to know. Fear of disapproval by a partner is also a powerful force, regardless of whether financial discussions are happening in the relationship. For example, 34% of U.S. adults who admitted to financial deception in a relationship with com-
How Financial Deception Affects Couples Like other forms of infidelity, financial cheating can wreak havoc on a relationship, including arguments, loss of trust, less privacy, separating combined finances and even divorce. However, those who have been there offered some insight into positive repercussions, too, such as growing closer together and learning to communicate proactively. Signs of Financial Infidelity You may discover your partner is cheating financially when you come across a receipt or piece of paper indicating a purchase you don’t recognize or find your partner defensive or withdrawn in conversations about money. A deceptive partner may attempt to intercept bills via mail or email before you see them or continued on page 7
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