41 52 willamette week, october 28, 2015

NEWS SAY GOODBYE TO CHARLIE HALES. CULTURE MEET THE NEW BLAZERS. BAR REVIEW MEET THE NEW CHOPSTICKS.

P. 7

P. 26

WILLAMETTE WEEK PORTLAND’S NEWSWEEKLY

“YOU HURT MY FEELINGS EVERY DAY.” P. 50 WWEEK.COM

VOL 41/52 10.28.2015

P. 47

THE 12 WONDERS OF PORTLAND FOOD THE STORIES BEHIND THE CITY’S MOST ICONIC DISHES.

While supplies last

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

WHITNEY SALGADO

FINDINGS

PAGE 26

WHAT WE LEARNED FROM READING THIS WEEK’S PAPER VOL. 41, ISSUE 52.

Charlie Hales declared Acupuncture Day while trying to energize his re-election campaign. 7

If you’ve been searching for a copy of 7-Eleven’s 1970 promotional single “Do the Slurp,” one finally surfaced. 30

Members of the local sports media hated Robin Lopez . 11

You should hate Robin Lopez, too. 31

The former Pok Pok employee for whom Ike’s Fish Sauce Wings is named may or may not drive a gold Lexus. 16

Insane Clown Posse are incredibly gifted songwriters. See “I Fucked a Cop” for proof. 37

ON THE COVER:

OUR MOST TRAFFICKED STORY ONLINE THIS WEEK:

A Portland food monument.

Photo by NashCO.

Finally, someone created a strip club haunted house.

STAFF Editor & Publisher Mark Zusman EDITORIAL News Editor Pro Tem Aaron Mesh Arts & Culture Editor Martin Cizmar Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, Beth Slovic Copy Chief Rob Fernas Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, Madeline Luce Stage & Screen Editor Enid Spitz Projects Editor Matthew Korfhage Music Editor Matthew Singer Web Editor Lizzy Acker Books James Helmsworth

Visual Arts Enid Spitz Editorial Interns Katana Dumont, Lisa Dunn, Coby Hutzler, Walker MacMurdo, Zach Middleton CONTRIBUTORS Dave Cantor, Nathan Carson, Rachel Graham Cody, Shannon Gormley, Jordan Green, Jay Horton, AP Kryza, John Locanthi, Anthony Macuk, Mark Stock, Anna Walters PRODUCTION Production Manager Dylan Serkin Art Director Julie Showers Special Sections Art Director Alyssa Walker Graphic Designers Rick Vodicka, Xel Moore Production Interns Elise Englert, Emily Joan Greene, Caleb Misclevitz, Kayla Sprint

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3

ARTIST LEAVING PORTLAND

downfall. I feel for those people somewhat, but What a shame local artist Carye Bye (and hubby) at the same time, what did you expect would are leaving Stumptown for Texas [“Portland, I happen with a continual influx of people to a city Love You but You’re Forcing Me Out,” WW, Oct. where young people want to live?

21, 2015].

I’m sorry to see a creative person with passion for the area leaving, The Byes didn’t get and I’m sure she’ll find a great home here too late. Like many of us, they couldn’t foresee in San Antonio. But I don’t blame the landlords, the city, or those migratout-of-state corporations ing here. They’re all a consequence buying up property and of the reason you wanted to come apartment buildings in here in the first place.

Portland, then doubling or tripling rents overnight.

—“Your mama” Where’s a citywide cap on rental rates, Mr. ExSTANDARDIZED TESTING While teachers may agree this is a Lobbyist Mayor? bad standardized test [“Cheating on Capitalism is fine, as long as there are checks and bal- “There Tests,” WW, Oct. 21, 2015], parents are ances. That’s exactly what cre- are far the ones who are opting their children ated the world’s best example out, and parents have a right to direct too many of a vibrant middle class after their children’s education, according to Neanderthals the Constitution and multiple Supreme World War II. Billionaires and corpora- down there.” Court decisions. tions today could not give a rat’s At the hearings for this bill, parents ass about American democracy and any middle were the ones who were pushing their legislaclass. It also explains the war on working people tors to pass it. Our kids are being overtested, being carried out by the elite’s political lackeys, and their school experience is being negatively the soulless Republicans. affected by an overemphasis on testing.

I wish the Byes all the best in their new advenPeople don’t object to assessments, just to ture, but I question their decision of Texas. There poorly designed, expensive, ineffective ones. are far too many Neanderthals down there. It People object to the overemphasis on a single test score and the narrowing of the curriculum. could be a very bumpy ride.

—Marvin Thiessen Parents are opting their kids out of Common Core testing all over the country. It’s insulting to I have lived here my entire life. I grew up during insinuate that parents don’t know what’s good the ’90s boom, and the same complaints were for their own kids. happening then in the form of “Californians are —Kathleen Hagans Jeskey coming here and buying up the property.”

At the time, our property values were much LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for verification. lower in comparison to San Francisco and other Letters must be 250 or fewer words.

California urban environments. Now the boom Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. that brought people here is becoming their Fax: (503) 243-1115. Email: mzusman@wweek.com.

Q.

Several houses in my neighborhood have recently had delivery packages stolen off the porch. We lost some sweet legal-weed paraphernalia from Amazon and a vegetable spaghettifier that was a gift from my mom. Can we do anything?

—Tweakers Begone!

I hesitate to give you, Tweakers, specific advice on how to defeat this thief, because—let’s face it—the kind of glue-sniffing ne’er-do-well who steals veggie spiralizers off people’s porches is pretty much this column’s target demographic.

Still, there are things you can do. Amazon didn’t respond to requests for comment, but anecdotal reports suggest it will often replace stolen pack4

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

ages at no charge. You know, lest you be tempted to return to the barbaric practice of buying things from local retailers with your bare hands.

Amazon also has a program—I’m not kidding—where you can have your stuff delivered to a locker at 7-Eleven, which sounds a lot like the kind of thing people used to do when their “stuff” happened to be 100 kilos of cocaine.

You can also take such boringly sensible precautions as requiring a signature for delivery, having the package delivered to your work, or investing in a locking parcel drop box.

But these won’t slake your thirst for vengeance—you want to catch the guy, “CSI: Portland”-style. Can technology help?

Police Bureau spokesman Sgt. Peter Simpson said he “wouldn’t recommend” my idea of boobytrapping your package with an exploding dye pack. He was down with spy cameras, however: “The cases we successfully solve are generally ones with a good surveillance image from a home surveillance system.”

Simpson also confirmed, usefully, that if you catch a delivery thief in the act, it counts as a big enough deal to call 911. Either way, file a police report—he says it helps.

Finally, there’s no law against putting a decoy package on your own porch filled with dog shit.

Or human shit. Or, if you really mean business, a human head. Godspeed.

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DOES ANYBODY WANT TO HOLD OFFICE? Multnomah County calendars, attendance records and excused absences show county commissioners cancel more public meetings than the Portland City Council, where commissioners and the mayor also have the freedom to play hooky whenever they want. So far in 2015, for example, the county commission has had to D LE CANCEL cancel seven board meetings because only two of five commissioners could attend. Portland City Hall has canceled just one City Council meeting so far in 2015, city records show. David Austin, a spokesman for the county, says the commissioners often travel for county business or have to deal with family issues. To see who was absent the most, check out wweek.com.

Peter Zuckerman has played many parts in Portland: Oregonian reporter, partner of former Mayor Sam Adams, author of a book on Himalayan Sherpas, and spokesman for last year’s ballot campaign to legalize recreational pot. Last week, Zuckerman closed another chapter in his life: He settled a lawsuit filed against him in 2014 by Idaho’s powerful Republican donor Frank VanderSloot. Zuckerman wrote stories in 2005 for the Post-Register in Idaho Falls about a pedophile in the Boy Scouts. VanderSloot attacked Zuckerman with fullpage newspaper ads—and then sued Zuckerman for how he described the fallout in an interview on The Rachel Maddow Show. Zuckerman signed a negotiated apology to VanderSloot on Oct. 19. “It’s been an adventure,” Zuckerman tells WW, and declined further comment. VanderSloot, who had a related lawsuit against Mother Jones magazine tossed by a judge Oct. 6, has announced he’s starting a “Guardian of True Liberty Fund” to protect conservative political figures from defamation by liberal media.

Jim Whitty traveled the world while building the Oregon Department of Transportation’s OreGo program, which taxes vehicles on miles traveled rather than gasoline consumed (“Paying by the Mile,” WW, July 1, 2015). Now he’s leaving his $124,000-a-year post. Lawmakers have been critical of the program, which took millions of dollars and a decade to launch, but OreGo spokeswoman Michelle Godfrey says ODOT considers it a success, even though it has signed up only 1,000 vehicle owners for a program that can accommodate 5,000.

Godfrey said Whitty decided it’s time to move on and will leave ODOT at the end of the year. “We’re proud of the work he’s done,” Godfrey says.

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NEWS

PORTLAND MAYOR CHARLIE HALES WITHDRAWS FROM A RE-ELECTION CAMPAIGN HE’D BARELY STARTED.

By BE T H S LOV I C

and

N I GEL JAQ UI SS

243-2122

Charlie Hales knew he wasn’t keeping his hold on the Portland mayor’s office. But even as he prepared to walk away, Hales wasn’t just going to let challenger Ted Wheeler waltz into City Hall.

On the weekend before Hales stunned Portland supporters and colleagues by ending his re-election bid Oct. 26, he talked with Multnomah County chief operating officer Marissa Madrigal. He encouraged Madrigal to run against Wheeler, the state treasurer whose candidacy for mayor has upended—and probably finished—Hales’ political career.

That meeting shows Hales was fighting to shape the city even as he retreated from the 2016 race. It was another maneuver from a mayor who for the past two months seemed both reinvigorated and panicked by Wheeler’s challenge. He seemed, at times, like the mayor Portlanders had hoped they’d elected three years ago.

But the flurry of action was too little, too late.

In a shockingly swift reversal, Hales had gone from an unchallenged incumbent to the object of scrutiny from Wheeler and the press, who said he was too close to developers and big companies like Uber, too far from Portlanders struggling to pay rising rents, and too eager to change his mind when hit with criticism.

Even Hales’ longtime enemies feel his pain.

“He and I never really hit it off,” says former City Commissioner Randy Leonard, “but I have to tell you that in spite of that, I felt some sympathy. It just got to the point where the guy couldn’t turn around without getting kicked.”

The long odds against Hales became clear two months ago.

Pollsters found a puzzling divergence: The electorate thought the city was moving in the right direction but thought Hales was not.

“If I didn’t know anything about this mayor and saw ‘right direction’ indicators where they are…that sounds like a recipe for re-election to me,” says John Horvick, political director for DHM Research.

But Hales faced several obstacles to re-election.

His closest supporters were real-estate developers—at a moment when developers were as popular as used-car salesmen—and his political consultant, Mark Wiener, was being scrutinized for lobbying for Uber.

Wheeler scored early endorsements from the three previous mayors—Sam Adams, Tom Potter and Vera Katz.

And Hales’ fundraising was drying up: Since Sept. 1, he raised only $34,000, about one-third of Wheeler’s total during the same period.

But Wheeler’s entry into the race Sept. 9 energized Hales, inspiring him to propose the kind of bold fixes his supporters in 2012 expected.

When Wheeler made housing an issue, Hales declared an emergency. When Wheeler criticized housing demolitions, Hales quickly hatched a “tear-down tax.”

Hales filled the calendar with new proclamations, announcing Hip-Hop Day and Acupuncture and Oriental Medicine Day and renaming Columbus Day as Indigenous People’s Day. He promised local public employee unions he would seek $15-an-hour wages for the city’s hundreds of seasonal workers.

Poked by Wheeler, Hales finally took a clear position on the controversial street fee, calling for a gas tax vote next May. He sought $500,000 to expedite hiring new police— a clear response to Wheeler’s interest in hiring 700 new officers.

This week, the City Council is scheduled to vote on yet another recent Hales initiative, nearly doubling city spending on housing.

Wheeler brought Hales to life. But it was too late. The mayor shifted into action so rapidly on so many issues that his behavior often looked panicked.

Leonard says he first noticed Hales’ frantic activity in May, when he reversed his support for a propane terminal proposed by Canadian energy company Pembina.

“It felt like a series of almost desperation moves,” says Leonard, “and Ted wasn’t even considered to be a potential candidate at that time. It just seemed like [Hales] was trying to ingratiate himself to different groups of voters and that it wasn’t sincere.”

Hales’ biggest supporters sensed the mayor secretly wanted out.

“I know that what he has really wanted to do is go sailing with his wonderful wife,” says developer John Russell.

“He has a fabulous boat that is capable of going around the world.”

Hales’ concession to Wheeler might seem hasty. But he’s shown willingness to walk away before—he abruptly left his city commissioner’s post in 2002 in the middle of his third term.

On Oct. 26, Hales said he decided not to run so he could focus his full attention on governing. He expressed hope that somebody else would jump in the race.

“He could have waited until much later,” says Joe Baessler, political director of the American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees. “I think there’s somebody else out there waiting to step into the race, and I think Charlie Hales knows who it is.”

Hales’ statement Monday supported that notion.

“The filing deadline is still over four months away, and I hope and expect that several qualified candidates will seek the office of mayor,” Hales said in the statement. “There are some dynamic new leaders in our community, and I’m excited to see who steps up.”

By then, he had already contacted Madrigal, who served as interim county chair after Jeff Cogen’s 2013 resignation and had earlier considered running for the City Council next year.

Madrigal did not respond to WW’s requests for comment by press deadlines.

She’s one of three women whom political insiders see as best positioned to run against Wheeler. Multnomah County Chairwoman Deborah Kafoury is strong on housing; House Speaker Tina Kotek (D-Portland) enjoys sturdy labor support. Neither has expressed any interest in running.

Observers say Hales did the city a final favor by conceding before a bruising race even started.

“The left lane is wide open,” says longtime lobbyist Len Bergstein. “Somebody with progressive credentials could run to Wheeler’s left and make it an interesting race.”

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

7

NEWS

A HUMAN RIGHTS GROUP ENDORSES KEEPING THE CITY’S MONEY FROM FOUR COMPANIES IN ISRAEL.

BY B ETH SLOVIC

8

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

bslovic@wweek.com

In May 2014, Portland city government made national headlines by dumping all of its WalMart bonds.

The idea, championed by City Commissioner Steve Novick, led to Portland City Hall last December expanding its “do not buy” list of corporations in which it refuses to invest its $940 million portfolio. That list currently includes Wal-Mart and fossil-fuel companies such as Chevron and Exxon Mobil.

Earlier this month, the Portland Human Rights Commission, an independent offshoot of the city’s Office of Equity and Human Rights, endorsed a proposal that would ask the city to grow its “do not buy” list—to include companies that activists say play a role in the state of Israel’s occupation of Palestine.

Now, however, two members of the commission have renounced their votes, the Jewish Federation of Greater Portland has accused the volunteer group of legitimizing a campaign that can foster anti-Semitism, and Mayor Charlie Hales has said he would block the effort to divest from the four companies.

“The issue is complex and hurtful for the communities involved,” Hales wrote in a statement.

The episode shows how an obscure commission that has no official role in setting city policy—Portland’s Socially Responsible Investments Committee, not the Human Rights Commission, recommends to the City Council who to include on the “do not buy” list—can nonetheless prove divisive.

Occupation-Free Portland, a coalition of Portland churches, activists and a group called Jewish Voice for Peace, says Motorola, HewlettPackard, G4S and Caterpillar support the Israeli occupation of Palestine by supplying personnel and equipment such as radios and bulldozers.

But Bob Horenstein, director of community relations for the Jewish Federation of Greater Portland, says divesting from the companies will do nothing to advance peace. He says the true goal of groups such as Occupation-Free Portland is to undermine Israel. He calls Jewish Voice for Peace a “fringe” group out of touch with the mainstream Jewish community.

“This has nothing to do with human rights,”

TYLER GROSS

West Banking

says Horenstein. “It is yet another attempt by the boycott/divestment/sanction movement to delegitimize the state of Israel and demonize the supporters of the state of Israel.”

The city’s Human Rights Commission walked into this debate seemingly by happenstance.

The Portland City Council adopted its “do not buy” list in October 2013 and tapped a committee to study Portland’s investment policies to ensure they were socially responsible.

This summer, 65-year-old Jewish activist Ned Rosch and others formed Occupation-Free Portland to urge city leaders to decline to invest in companies that are, in their eyes, complicit in the Israel-Palestine conflict.

“We’re trying to balance the scales of justice in a situation that is highly unjust,” says Peter Miller, a member of the coalition.

The city isn’t currently invested in Motorola, Hewlett-Packard or G4S. It is invested in Caterpillar, and does buy products from the companies, including fire equipment from Motorola paid for with money from Portland’s $72.4 million fire bond issue, which voters approved in 2010.

Rosch and others spoke to the Human Rights Commission in September, seeking the group’s endorsement. The commission voted at its Oct. 7 meeting to give its approval.

Marcia Suttenberg, one of two Jewish members of the commission who voted to endorse the coalition’s message, says she regretted the vote almost immediately. She says supporters of the cause made statements after the vote that were “offensively anti-Israel.”

Suttenberg had missed the September meeting but voted anyway.

“I didn’t know what we were voting for,” she says now. “It was kind of rushed through.”

Chabre Vickers, chairwoman of the Human Rights Commission, defends her group’s actions. “We encouraged them to use the public process,” she says. “I do believe we followed our job, which is to listen to the public.”

Portland isn’t the first city where the idea of divesting from companies that do business with Israel has been raised this fall.

Last week, a Berkeley, Calif., commission rejected a similar proposal, in a three-hour hearing marked by shouting matches. The Costra Costa Times reported a member of the Berkeley City Council fired his appointee to the commission for proposing the idea without telling him first.

Portland’s committee on socially responsible investing isn’t scheduled to make new recommendations for the city’s “do not buy” list until next year. Even so, Occupation-Free Portland’s proposal is unlikely to gain traction without support from the mayor.

Vickers has invited members of the Jewish Federation of Greater Portland to the Human Rights Commission’s Nov. 4 meeting.

“The Human Rights Commission didn’t do their homework,” says the federation’s Horenstein. “The fact that they could consider a controversial issue like this without reaching out to the mainstream Jewish community is mystifying.”

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

9

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TANYA ROBERTS & JEEVES

WHITNEY SALGADO

NEWS

Jason Quick THE FORMER OREGONIAN COLUMNIST— AND NEW TV PERSONALITY—EXPLAINS WHY THIS YEAR’S BLAZERS TEAM WILL DEFY LOW EXPECTATIONS.

BY AA R O N M E S H

amesh@wweek.com

Jason Quick is taking his talents to cable.

It has been a bummer offseason for the Portland Trail Blazers, with four of the basketball franchise’s five starters bolting in free agency or trades. So did Quick—one the best-known reporters covering the team, and the one with the most knowledge of the locker room.

Quick covered the Blazers at The Oregonian for 16 years: first as a beat reporter, then a columnist, with a brief hiatus to cover Oregon Ducks football. His behindthe-scenes stories of Rasheed Wallace, Brandon Roy and LaMarcus Aldridge spanned the team’s journey from oftarrested “Jail Blazers” to the much-loved roster that last season disintegrated along with guard Wesley Matthews’ Achilles tendon.

Quick quit The O this month, in an acrimonious departure he’s not yet willing to discuss. He’s found a new home at Comcast SportsNet Northwest, which airs the Blazers TV broadcasts. He’ll be filing stories for the cable station’s website, along with appearing on the pre- and postgame shows.

But Quick still has enough love for newspapers to talk to WW on the eve of the season about his new gig, his scariest Jail Blazers stories, and how many games this year’s team will win. (It’s more than most people think.)

WW: You’ve been in print journalism since 1988.

What’s it like being a TV guy?

Jason Quick: I’m still not totally comfortable. I had a moment where I realized what the dangers of it were, because I have this habit of speaking my mind, and in print you can write something and go, “No, no, I shouldn’t say that,” and take it back. But we were on Talkin’ Ball, and I think I called Robin Lopez a jerk. And then I did some backtracking and said, “Well, he’s not a jerk, he’s just mean,” and I wish I wouldn’t have said that.

Was RoLo mean to the media?

Yes, he was awful, the worst on the team, by far, head and shoulders. He made it very uncomfortable. There’d be times, if you got him on something really offbeat, like comics or movies, where he could be OK. But he was very socially awkward, and he could be very prickly. Definitely everyone’s least favorite.

What do you miss most so far about The Oregonian?

Nothing, so far. I think eventually I’m going to miss the step-back pieces, the long-form, enterprise [stories] that I was afforded at The Oregonian. But I’m going to be prolific.

Do you have ethical worries about being in a news organization that has a contract with the team?

In our interview, that was brought up very quickly, and I told them, “Hey, I’ve got to be able to tell the truth,” and they were wholeheartedly behind that. They’re in a tricky position because they need to negotiate this contract and they don’t want to ruffle feathers over there. That was brought up, and I said, “Hey, the truth is your strongest friend.”

What’s your over-under on how many games this team’s going to win this year?

I think they win 35. I think they’re going to be much better than people think.

I think Dame, if [he wanted to go back], would go to Stotts and Olshey and say, “No. Hey, I know the guys. We all say, ‘Let’s get back to Portland.’” I think Dame has his finger on the pulse of his teammates more than LaMarcus did.

Will they play any defense?

Yeah! It’s a much better defensive team, head to toe or top to bottom, than they’ve had, and they were a top 10 defensive team last year. I mean [Al-Farouq] Aminu, Ed Davis, [Maurice] Harkless—those are some pretty good defenders right there.

You covered those Jail Blazers teams in the 1990s.

What’s your craziest Jail Blazers story?

There were two times when I was scared. Three times, really.

Once, we were in San Antonio, and I was waiting to interview Rasheed Wallace, and Rasheed had his back to me, and I was asking questions, asking questions. He whipped around, threw his towel down, and said, “Why would I talk to you when all you do is rip us cats?” I went right back at him. And we were face to face, and players immediately jumped up and separated me, and I remember it was Rick Brunson and Steve Kerr who got in front of me and were just like, “Jason, you need to leave, you don’t know what this guy can do.”

[Quick tells another story about Scottie Pippen, which is too long to recount here, but you can read it on wweek.com.]

And then there was another time—I don’t know that I was afraid, but it was definitely in the back of my mind, and actually it was one of the greatest conversations I ever had. It was with Bonzi Wells. We got to talking about our professions, and he was like, “You don’t understand, Quick, about how tough it is. You keep saying how much money we make, but you don’t know how we have to support our families, and how all these other people come to you with their sob stories.”

It was a very cordial and professional conversation, but then, throughout it, he said, “Don’t be surprised if you show up to practice with a steak over your eye.” And I said, “Oh, well, I’ll be a rich man then.” And then he said, “Oh no, I wouldn’t do it, I wouldn’t be that dumb.” So it’s insinuating that I’d leave the arena one night, and he’d have people punch me.

I gotta tell you, some nights I’d leave the arena and I’d be looking over my shoulder.

How much is a seat in the 300 section going to go for

by February?

You know what? I still think this team’s going to hold this town’s interest. I still think they’ll sell out, and I think they’re going to remain relevant, even through February.

And the great thing about this is: If they are relevant in February, they have a ton of flexibility, both roster-wise and [salary] cap-wise, to make a deal. They’ve got three guys on non-guaranteed contracts. So it could be fun.

What changed about Damian Lillard over the course of this year?

I’ve seen the same Dame I’ve seen since day one, where basketball is No. 1. But—I mean, people think this is drama or being made up—but I can’t state enough how much there was an unspoken conflict between LaMarcus and Dame. And it was all from LaMarcus’s side. Damian wants to win. He was confined under the enigma that was LaMarcus Aldridge. He couldn’t spread his wings and be the real Dame.

What’s an example?

I think there were times when he wanted to kick the team in the ass and say something in the locker room, but he wasn’t quite sure if it was his place. Last year in the playoffs in Memphis, the Blazers’ health and performance team suggested that studies show that it’s best for the team to stay the night and get a good night’s sleep, and then fly back to Portland. Well, LaMarcus heard that and said, “No, no. I’m not staying another night in Memphis.” He got a private jet.

GO: The Trail Blazers open the season against the New Orleans Pelicans on Wednesday, Oct. 28, at 7 pm at Moda Center. Read WW’s look at the new roster on page 26, and our advice for how to greet departed players on page 31.

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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Whiskey is both a spirit and a culture. There are whiskey bars, whiskey tastings and whiskey festivals, even out here in Beervana. There’s just something in a peaty Scotch, a smooth bourbon or a bold rye that inspires affection, devotion and often times obsession with this distilled and aged grain liquor. And for Portlanders trying to learn more about whiskey, there’s a Whiskey 101 (and 102) class taught by local bar manager Andrew Finkelman.

Finkelman’s love affair with whiskey began with Jameson, segued into bourbon and then into every style available. Before he knew it, Finkelman was teaching Whiskey 101 as a birthday present to some customers. 101 covers the American style (bourbon, rye and Tennessee Whiskey), while 102 ventures overseas for Scotch, Irish and Japanese whiskey. Whenever anyone asks which is his favorite, Finkelman says it depends on his mood.

One of the first things you’ll learn in Whiskey 101 is to “never let your ingredients overpower the whiskey flavor.” That’s why Bulleit is Finkelman’s go-to bourbon whenever he’s trying a new cocktail recipe.

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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BY MATTHEW KOR FHAGE

This week, we release our annual Restaurant Guide—look for it in select blue boxes, plus restaurants, bars and Powell’s Books—which captures everything we love about the 99 best restaurants in town and names Portland’s 2015 Restaurant of the Year.

But this story is not about the Restaurant of the Year.

It’s not about what’s new. In a certain way, it’s not even about restaurants.

It’s about the dishes that make a vital restaurant scene like Portland’s possible.

The simple Thai chicken and rice dish that spread from a humble downtown food cart to fuel TV appearances, TED Talks and a burgeoning Portland empire.

A fast-food-inspired burger at a French restaurant that’s routinely ranked as one of the best in the nation.

A humble homestyle casserole elevated to refined

AND

MA RTIN CIZMA R

comfort at what may very well be the best Russian eatery in the country.

While anyone can capitalize on so-hot-right-now trends, only the very best chefs can truly create an icon, a plate of food that endures for years as a symbol of what good food can be.

Over time, their reputation spreads to the Japanese tourists lining up joyfully on the sidewalk for chicken and waffles, or chefs from Iceland who return to their homeland raving about those crazy fish sauce wings.

Chances are, you’ve tried many of these dishes. But we asked the people behind the 12 most iconic Portland dishes of the past decade to tell us the stories behind the food we love: the moments of inspiration, the thought behind each ingredient, and the lucky accidents.

Here are the origins of the 12 wonders of Portland food.

THE STORIES BEHIND THE CITY’S MOST ICONIC DISHES.

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

NASHCO

Le Pigeon 738 E Burnside St., 546-8796, lepigeon.com.

Le Pigeon burger

The cheeseburger at East Burnside’s cramped, clubby Le Pigeon became a cult favorite in part because of chef Gabe Rucker’s original practice of limiting the number served in a night to five. “It was never a hard limit,” he says. “But after we stopped limiting the number, we actually sold fewer burgers.” At a restaurant known for beef bourguignon, duck blanquette and dry sherry, it’s odd to see a $14 burger and a $3 bottle of Coors Banquet.

But that burger’s success proved wildly influential.

Since Le Pigeon’s legendary burger debuted in 2006, it’s rare to find high-end Portland restaurants that don’t offer a bistro burger and a tallboy—a quirk to this town.

As told by Rucker…

“My first day at the restaurant, I was trying to get my head screwed on straight. I was just spitting out ingredients, and somebody wrote them down.

I said, ‘We need a burger, and we’re going to play off fast food.’ I said, ‘We’re going to make the patty square like Wendy’s.’ I think Jack in the Box was pushing ciabatta at the time. We used extra-sharp white cheddar from Tillamook, and I love onions on a burger, which stems from eating at In-N-Out a lot— we grill and pickle them so you get the best of both worlds.

And I like iceberg lettuce, which I use as a delivery vehicle for the housemade aioli. It distributes it. The thing I hate is when there are globs of mayonnaise. The Dijon is a spicy Dijon, and for the housemade ketchup I spit out a list of ingredients, we made it, and it’s been our ketchup ever since.

Nine years later, newspapers are still calling me about that burger. To be a good chef, you need a lot of luck. Some things you have to abandon, but this came out as a perfect storm.”

CONT. on page 16

FREE

Find your copy of Willamette Week’s Restaurant Guide at locations all over town.

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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the 12 wonders of portland food

NASHCO

Pok Pok 3226 SE Division St., 232-1387, pokpokpdx.com.

Coppa steaK

Andy Ricker began Pok Pok as a little chicken shack on an unauspicious plot of land on Southeast Division. It went from service-industry secret to nationwide phenomenon in just a few years.

That charcoal-grilled chicken, learned in Thailand, may have inspired Ricker to start the restaurant. But the wings that turned Pok Pok into an icon came not from Thailand but from a dish Ricker had in Hanoi in 2004, with a helping hand from Ricker’s very first employee, Ich “Ike” Truong. Ricker’s wings were coming out too salty, so he asked Ike if he knew how to make Vietnamese fish sauce wings.

John Kennedy was Ricker’s lead line cook from 2006 to 2008, as the wings were introduced—at the time, he says, he held the house record for making the most wings in a night, at more than 800.

As told by Ricker and Kennedy...

Toro Bravo 120 NE Russell St., 281-4464, torobravopdx.com.

John Gorham invented the coppa steak.

Well, the restaurateur didn’t invent cows, cold-smoking or dry-aging.

But his technique was the secret formula for turning a forgotten cut into a perfect hunk of meat on a tight budget.

Like so many great, meaty innovations, it was born of tough times—in this case, the Bush recession—and through days of work it becomes a tender hunk. Then it’s just a matter of giving it crispy edges and a topping of spicycreamy salbitxada, a Catalan sauce made of almond, garlic and chilies. In 2007, when we named Toro Bravo the Restaurant of the Year, we called it “at least as satisfying—and far more interesting—than many steakhouse cuts at triple the price.”

As told by Gorham...

RICKER: Ike’s Vietnamese Fish Sauce Wings came from a dish I had in Hanoi back in 2004 or so on a backpacking trip at a bia hoi stand, called ga chien nuoc mam (fish sauce wings).

You can find a version of them at a lot of Vietnamese restaurants in the U.S.A. When the main restaurant opened, they were one of the first things I wanted to be on the menu. I was fucking around with the recipe, and they were not coming out right: too salty. So I asked Ike, Ich Truong, who was my first employee…if he knew how to make them. He said “yeah, man” and asked me to give him 2 pounds of wings. The piece of the puzzle I was missing was the addition of garlic water to the marinade recipe and a bit more sugar than I was using, and suddenly the flavor came out correct. He also told me to glaze them with the same stuff we marinate them in and to add some chili paste to the glaze if I wanted them spicier. That was the extent of Ike’s involvement with the development of the recipe—just that one hour, one afternoon, but it was invaluable, and it is the reason we named them after him.

KENNEDY: There was a good four to five months that Pok Pok was dead. When we experienced the media boom, everybody was behind the eight ball. We went from doing 50 covers a night to doing 300 covers a night. Wings will also steam themselves on the plate, so they’re not going to be crispy. This was before we had runners and servers with ear monitors. We just had two walkie-talkies.

RICKER: We had the recipe down, we were just having issues with execution on the line.

[Kennedy] provided a key to the process, which was to squirt a small amount of water into the pan at the end. This happened fairly soon after we started developing the recipe.

KENNEDY: What makes the wings work is the double frying. It goes straight from the fryer to wok with fish sauce, palm sugar, fried garlic—and if it’s spicy wings, bird pepper chili paste. A few tosses in the wok and you’re basically candying it. The Chinese have been doing it for eons…. After Ike’s fish sauce wings gained in popularity, people started to wonder: These wings are by far the most popular item. What’s Ike getting out of all this? One day he did show up driving a gold Lexus.

RICKER: Ike has always been credited for his contribution to the recipe, which was the process of adding water to the garlic and squeezing the juice out instead of using whole garlic, and a couple other minor adjustments. He supplied the key ingredient to getting the recipe on the right track, and he has been compensated for that and will continue to be compensated. He does drive a Lexus from Pok Pok and other jobs he’s held, but I don’t think it’s gold.

“When you’re in Spain, there are a lot of big chunks of beef everywhere.

We wanted that, but we wanted to keep our prices low at Toro—we opened in 2008, right after the market crash, but we wanted something that would give you that feeling of having a nice steak.

So I came across chuck-eye roast. It comes from right at the top of the neck—in pork, it would the coppa. It’s not an expensive cut. And I started thinking, ‘How can I break this piece of meat down and give it big flavor?’ We experimented with it—cleaning it and trussing it and then open-air aging with a salt cure.

We put it in salt and pepper and open-air age in the walk-in for five days. That’s dry-aging. We cold-smoke it for a couple hours and we plastic-wrap it right then and put it back in the cooler—that’s wet-aging.

What that does is really start to break down the tissue.

The salt and the pepper get in there—those are the only seasonings, salt, pepper and smoke—and the salt allows us to really get that crazy crust on the outside when we sear it. After we cook it, we let it rest, always, for a half-hour. No matter how busy we are, we let it rest for a half-hour before we serve it.

It’s those secondary cuts when you see the chops of a real chef and cook. We can all cook a tenderloin really well. What can you do with a cheaper, tougher piece of meat?”

ike's fish sauce wings 16

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

Ox

Herring under a Fur Coat

2225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 284-3366, oxpdx.com.

Until recently, our port town’s seafood didn’t stray much from the trout and salmon caught in nearby rivers. Even with the coast just two hours away, oyster options didn’t go much farther afield than Dan & Louis or Jake’s, and other than a pilgrimage to Mo’s at the coast, Portland had no clam chowder tradition to speak of.

Well, Ox built Portland’s chowder scene single-handedly in 2012, with a bowl spiced with jalapeño and fortified with bone marrow. It became instantly famous in town as soon as it arrived.

It’s a long, contented sigh of umami with bright and salty spice, infused with the delicacy of fresh clams still in their shells.

As told by chef Greg Denton...

NASHCO

NASHCO

“This version of my clam chowder I started to develop at a restaurant when I was in Napa Valley—the chef Hiro Sone put me in charge of certain things, and soup was one. Then I brought it to Metrovino, and it became seafood chowder to be able to use fish scraps. But we made it with flour, so it was really heavy—it was hard to eat anything after it.

When I left Metrovino, there were certain recipes the owner wanted to keep. So I said, ‘I’ll make a better chowder.’ I started by thinking, what were the negatives of that chowder? The heaviness. By removing the flour, we made it lighter, even though it’s still milk and cream. That milky broth allows us to open up clams inside that chowder, so there’s a fresh burst of seafood flavor. And they’re freshly opened, which makes everything better.

So we had this chowder—and we needed something to replace that floury richness. We thought, hey, let’s throw a canoe-cut marrow bone in there. We’ll smoke it first, and then we’ll warm it up and put that on top. You have fattiness you‘d get from bacon, and smokiness you’d get from bacon. And then there’s still bacon in there.

To balance this thing with fat and smoke and fat and smoke, you have to balance it with something extreme. That’s where the raw, sliced jalapeño came in. By adding fresh-cut spring onions and parsley with jalapeños, it balances it.

When we were opening the restaurant, we were so tired, working so many hours, up until 4 am. I got the first taste, and it was an emotional response. I can’t tell you what emotion—fear, anxiety, happiness and sadness all mixed together. I knew right away it would be a special dish.

Now we sell more chowders on the hottest days of the year than the coldest days. I don’t know why. But we sell it all year-round. We had a gentleman, he’d come in and order two chowders and get a skirt steak. Then he’d get a chowder to go.”

Kachka 720 SE Grand Ave., 235-0059, kachkapdx.com.

Kachka chef Bonnie Morales was once embarrassed by the Russian food she grew up eating: the pickled fish and pink-topped casseroles served next to bottles of vodka.

But after a dinner at her mother’s house, Morales’ future husband and Kachka partner, Israel, was enthralled with both the food and culture, and Morales changed her mind about the worth of her humble home foods.

At Kachka, which opened in 2014 and is now widely considered one of our nation’s best Russian restaurants, Morales’ pelmeni dumplings and beef-tongue stroganoff are wonders of richness, texture and comfort. But the most striking dish—the one everyone comes home talking about—is also the most humble, a pink-topped salad called herring under a fur coat, served in the shape of a lovely rainbow-layered galette of fish and vegetable. It looks like nothing else on earth, and it tastes like pure comfort.

As told by Morales...

“When you think of Russian food from the Soviet era, there are a handful of dishes. This is one of them. It’s something my mother had at parties, something I’d grown up around. Growing up, I found it horrifying—I wouldn’t touch it with a 10-foot pole. I don’t think I ever tried it myself until Israel and I were dating, and he thought it was so good.

It’s really interesting when you think about it. There are all these soft flavors. Usually you want there to be a variety of textures, but there are exceptions. The unctuousness builds on itself until it becomes decadent. The differences are very minor on our dish to what my mother does: Herring is normally its own layer, but we instead make a marinade and dice it up with sweet onion and dill and oil to integrate the flavor into the herring.

And we make our own mayonnaise, which is something most home cooks never do. Part of making herring under a fur coat is, you put plain old mayo on top, and the mayo turns pink. It tastes better fresh, so we mix the beets in with the mayonnaise. It’s a little bit of a trick to make it look like it sat a little bit. That pink can be very striking in small quantities.”

clam chowder Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

the 12 wonders of portland food Aviary

Fried KalE

1733 NE Alberta St., 287-2400, aviarypdx.com.

New York chefs Sarah Pliner, Jasper Shen and Kat Whitehead came to Portland to follow their dream of starting a restaurant, all moving into the same house to plan their menu. The restaurant they finally built, Aviary, was a wonder of imaginative ingredients marrying European techniques and Asian influences. It promptly burned to the ground because of an errant firework on the Fourth of July.

But they rebuilt within the year, becoming our 2012 Restaurant of the Year in part on the strength of a dish made with the same pig’s ears you give your dog to chew. The crispy pig’s ear bowl is a hybrid beast: a concoction of refined and balanced herbal notes in a dish as salty, savory and fun as a bag of chips at the Super Bowl. But they’d first conceived their trademark dish out of desperation, when they were tired of everything else.

As told by Pliner...

NASHCO

“When we first moved here from New York, Jasper and Kat were living with me. We were trying to talk about what the restaurant would be and working on dishes, and really had a week of cooking nothing we were happy with.

We were tired of eating really complicated food. We just decided to make some leftovers and rice. What we made that day was steamed rice and a bunch of herbs and daikon with black vinegar and avocado, and that was it.

Thai basil and cilantro, and tiato—it’s a type of shiso—and rau ram (Vietnamese coriander), which is shaped like mint but it’s a rounder leaf with some fishy things going on. But it was really good, even missing a lot of the elements we ended up with. One of us said, ‘This should be a dish at our restaurant.’

I took it from there and added pig’s ear and coconut rice Chinese sausage to finish it. I felt like it was a pretty satisfying dish as it was, without any proteins, but if you’re trying to get a menu together, it needs to be more than what you eat at home.

I didn’t want to do a really fatty protein—pig’s ears are fatty the way that potato chips are, they don’t sit in you like a brick.

Especially in the beginning, we were trying to be a less expensive restaurant, so I was working really hard to find things that were cheap but good that we could get out there at our price. Something fun that would function like a protein but be less serious to eat, and also be interesting. We wanted a menu that people would talk about.”

Crispy Pig's Ear

Smallwares 4605 NE Fremont St., 971-229-0995, smallwarespdx.com.

David Chang is probably best-known to food-obsessive Portlanders for palling around with Anthony Bourdain in Japan on TV and founding McSweeney’s food porn mag Lucky Peach.

But his New York-based Momofuku chain of restaurants has cast a long shadow in Portland, from those once-ubiquitous steamed pork buns to alums like the Stray Dogs chefs Peter Cho and Johnny Leach, Double Dragon owner Rob Walls and, of course, Smallwares’ chef-owner Johanna Ware, whose bowl of fried kale, candied bacon, mint and fish sauce remains the hallmark of this Beaumont neighborhood “inauthentic Asian” restaurant.

The dish is both deceptively simple and startlingly singular, and it finds its origins back East.

As told by Ware...

NASHCO

“It came about from a classic Momofuku dish I made when I was working [at the famous New York restaurant]. They’d just opened Ssäm Bar, and they had fried Brussels sprouts with fish sauce vinaigrette. I didn’t want to replicate it, but I was influenced by it.

If you talk to any chef who was working at Momofuku at that time, they all have their own version.

We actually started with butternut squash. But I hate butternut squash. So when spring came around, I tried different greens. I thought, ‘I’ve never fried kale.’ When you have a fryer, you just kind of want to put things in it. I didn’t really think it was going to work.

It was kind of hard to figure out. You want the leaves to be big. You get the leaves in flat—you can’t put in a massive pile. It takes time. On Friday and Saturday, we have one extra person on kale duty.

The fish sauce vinaigrette is cut with lime water, sugar, chilies and garlic, then chopped-up cilantro and onions. I love bacon and wanted something smoky and fatty in there. The bacon is candied, and it’s a very smoky bacon. I thought the smoke and fat and sugar would go well with the saltiness of everything.

When we teach our new cooks, we let them know this is the one dish they have to nail. I definitely didn’t expect it to become our signature dish.”

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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the 12 wonders of portland food Nong’s Khao Man Gai Multiple locations, including 609 SE Ankeny St., Suite C, 740-2907, khaomangai.com.

Nong Poonsukwattana knew Portland didn’t need another typical Thai restaurant. That was obvious when she arrived on the heels of her now-exhusband, who attended Portland State.

After a year working at Pok Pok, she got an idea. She bought a food cart just ahead of full-blown cartmania and started working on making the perfect chicken and rice.

The eponymous dish at Nong’s is still the main offering, six years and several offshoots later. You need nothing else: tender chicken served on a bed of rice with soybean sauce and a little palate-cleansing soup. It’s sticky, rich, beautiful and perfect, exploding with ginger and chili and garlic. It is, Poonsukwattana says, exactly what she would serve to her friends or family.

fried chicken and waffle

As told by Poonsukwattana...

M AT T W O N G

“I came to America with the dream that I would have a better life. With the cart, I started everything from scratch. The idea was just to create something for myself, a future for myself, with no man, just one woman. I want to make a living making things with my hands that I’m proud of.

What I learned from working at Pok Pok is that there are 500 Thai restaurants in Portland and I had to make something different. Where I’m coming from, you can do just one thing—a whole family makes one thing very well and passes the knowledge to the next generation. At the market, there would be like 500 other vendors who would compete, so you would have to be good.

I just make chicken and rice like it’s supposed to be, and that’s what I know. There are four parts of the dish: rice, chicken, sauce and soup. The hardest part of the dish is rice. If you try to train 10 people to make rice, there will be only one person who can make it.

With each ingredient, I got the best. With soy sauce, it’s like tequila— you can buy $15 tequila or you can buy $70 tequila. I chose the one that’s the best. In this process, everything came down to a choice I’d make, and I wanted to pick the best one.

When I started, it was hard. When I opened one day, I worked all day and only made $40. I was crying. I asked myself if I was happy. And the answer was yes, I was proud of what I made.”

Screen Door

Khao Man Gai

2337 E Burnside St., 542-0880, screendoorrestaurant.com.

Fried chicken and waffles are a salty, sweet soul-food tradition from the Southern diaspora—depending on who you believe, originating at either a 1930s speakeasy in Harlem or a 1940s soul spot in Los Angeles. But over the past 10 years, standing in an hour-plus line to eat Screen Door’s towering plate of fried chicken on a sweet potato waffle has also become a hallowed tradition, so popular that the restaurant is under constant pressure to come up with specials that compete with the chicken.

E M I LY J O A N G R E E N E

As told by co-owner Nicole Mouton...

“When we first opened, we didn’t really know what to expect. It was a totally different restaurant scene. Clarklewis was in its heyday, and they wanted to kill the restaurant and re-create the restaurant. We said, ‘Let’s find a place where you can bring everybody and everybody feels at home.’

The thing we’re most proud of is, we have the most diverse dining room in the city, hands down. All kinds of people come to our restaurant, and that makes me happy.

We didn’t have the fried chicken and waffle on the menu originally, and we had customers asking about it. We started playing around with different versions.

A lot of times with fried chicken, they try to put in a bunch of secret-recipe spices. We felt like keeping it simple was best. We decided to go with boneless because brunch is fast-paced. We didn’t want people to worry about chicken on the bone.

We went with a sweet potato waffle to give it a unique touch that we could call our own. It has some flavor in common with pie spice, but there’s also some molasses. It works with fried chicken.

We just started loading chicken, and we got to a pound-plus of food. People just couldn’t believe it. It was jaw-dropping to see that much food on one plate.

When we first started, it was more than we could handle. It was a learning curve. We had no idea when we put fried chicken on the menu it would outpace everything else.

It sort of creates a competition in the kitchen, within the menu itself. You can’t have a kitchen where you get all the food coming off one station. We serve 500 plates in a brunch. What fantastic thing can we create that will lure people off the fried chicken? It’s a challenge. We don’t ever beat it, but we come close.

It tastes really damn good. Ten years later, you’ll still catch me, the owner, sitting down to a plate of chicken and waffle.”

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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the 12 wonders of portland food Holdfast Dining Fausse Piste Winery, 537 SE Ash St., Suite 102, holdfastdining.com.

Part of the fun of going out to a hot new restaurant is comparing notes with others who have been.

Sadly, most of the pop-up dinner series that have captured the imagination of local foodies don’t offer that—the array of dishes is dizzying, and the menus change nightly.

But anyone who’s dropped $90 (not including gratuity) for a nine-course prix fixe meal at Holdfast has one dish in common. That dish is the youngest and sweetest icon on this list, a cornbread madeleine tucked between the savory and dessert courses to brilliant effect.

It was developed by chef Will Preisch during a European odyssey that followed his time as the head chef at the Bent Brick. Under his watch, the restaurant was adventurously modern. It just never gelled with the space.

Following Preisch’s departure, publications like The Oregonian and Portland Monthly filed obituaries for his Portland cooking career (“it takes some major cojones for a restaurateur to admit defeat,” wrote Portland Monthly; “where’s the burger?” asked The Oregonian) but quickly hailed his second coming, which finds Preisch and fellow Bent Brick alum Joel Stocks doing everything inside Southeast’s dim Fausse Piste urban winery.

Bunk Sandwiches 621 SE Morrison St. and other locations, 328-2865, bunksandwiches.com.

Tommy Habetz started his chef ’s career cooking in the restaurants of seemingly every celebrity chef in America, from Bobby Flay to Mario Batali to culinary tycoon Drew Nieporent. But his tastes ran a lot simpler. He wanted to run a sandwich shop, making the humble flavors he fell in love with starting when he was a kid eating at McDonald’s.

Bunk’s pork belly Cubano hit Portland’s food scene like a protein bomb, sending lunchtime lines sprawling out onto the sidewalks of a then-desolate stretch of Southeast Morrison. It’s a classic Cuban updated with a fine smoked ham and a healthy slab of fatty, lovely pork belly, and when it is perfect, it is truly perfect.

As told by Habetz...

“The pork belly Cubano first came about when I worked in Boca Raton, Fla., for a year in 2000 opening a resort. Florida, especially at that time, is the desert of morals and the desert of food. Cuban food was where it’s at.

The first time I had a Cubano sandwich I was obsessed. It’s a perfect sandwich. The combination of flavors is similar to a McDonald’s cheeseburger.

When I was a kid, a McDonald’s cheeseburger was the most delicious thing—I was not raised on foie gras.

Move forward to 2008, we’re starting Bunk, and I said, ‘We gotta do a Cubano.’

One of the great things about being an American chef, and a Portland chef specifically, is you’ve got a lot of freedom. There’s a blank slate. Sometimes that results in horrible abominations with too many alfalfa sprouts, but it lets you stand back, look at something and see every element to make an improvement.

The sandwich is great, but the ham and the pork loin are always the weak elements. We have a great smoked ham from Eastern Oregon— otherwise it’s usually just a boiled ham. And at the time, pork belly was kind of an unusual thing. We took a chance by making it pork belly—some people find it too fatty. Now we make a roast out of the shoulder and the belly, so you get some of the meatiness of the shoulder. We do a cure on it, and then slow roast it with molasses.

We wanted to use a really good yellow mustard, and adding mayonnaise is kind of a personal thing. Some people are traditionalists. But the mayo and the swiss cheese, when we put it into a press and put it in an oven, it creates a whole other thing. It makes a great sauce. We add Valentina hot sauce, which tastes like Cholula at a fraction of the cost.

The Cubano was featured on Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives within the first 12 months of being open, even though we were neither a diner, drive-in or dive. Chris Cosentino picked it on The Best Thing I Ever Ate. And now everyone gets the Cubano.”

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“When I left the Bent Brick it was my decision, but obviously I was not having the success I wanted to have there. After I left, I wanted to continue my culinary education. I’m a rather proud culinary school dropout, but I was in a journeyman phase.

I had already been at the Bent Brick and spent a lot of time thinking about what went right and what went wrong. A lot of our food now isn’t super-different—it’s all about packaging and timing. The city wasn’t ready for it, and it was on a macro scale at the Bent Brick.

And certainly everything we do is a little more dialed in now. The technique we use isn’t super-different, but the food itself is a lot more simple and with the tasting-menu format the food can be more focused.

I came up with that dish in Copenhagen. I was staging at the restaurant Relæ. And at Relæ, when it’s your last day in the kitchen, you make a staff meal. I wanted to do something really American that they wouldn’t have had before, so I came up with the idea of cornbread and chili, so I made cornbread with honey butter.

They freaked out about the cornbread. That’s the same cornbread the madeleine is made of. As an American, it was tough to explain that though this bread is really sweet, it’s not a dessert.

It just kinda spiraled as I thought about it. We deconstructed it: cornbread toasted in the oven during service. Once it’s crispy, we brush it with brown butter five times, after that we put a layer of lardo and then the honeycomb on top with some salt. I was inspired to cover it in Parmesan cheese by Relæ as well; they had a snack on called the ‘Kornly cracker’ that was shrouded in so much cheese it was all you could see.

It was on the first Holdfast weekend dinners. I really liked the cornbread madeleine, but I didn’t intend to keep it around for every meal.

But it got requested for a photo shoot the following weekend, for Portland Monthly.

We ran it again the next weekend. We got another request for it to be in a photo. I thought, ‘We’ve already served it at the first four dinners, maybe we should just keep it around?’ It bridges the gap between savory and sweet in a really awesome way.

So it’s stuck around—it’s the only thing that’s been on every menu we’ve done.”

M AT T W O N G

K AY L A S P R I N T

As told by Preisch...

M AT T W O N G

VINTAGE CLOTHES, ANTIQUES & COSTUME JEWELRY 503.226.2616 • 1001 SW MORRISON ST.

SIMPLISTIC APPROACH

BOLD FLAVOR Apizza Scholls 4741 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 233-1286, apizzascholls.com.

Nothing about Portland’s perfect sausage and pepper pie was planned. Not the electric oven that bakes it, not the space the houses it and definitely not the pricey peppers that have returned to top it after a year in the wilderness.

As told by pizzaiolo Brian Spangler...

“We moved to Scholls, Ore., in 2000 and bought the remnants of a five-acre Christmas tree farm. I built a bakery in the barn. I built a wood-fired oven, and we started Olive Mountain Baking Company. Sunday was pizza day. We started thinking about places like Patsy’s in East Harlem, and just kept experimenting with that style. After two to three years of doing this every weekend we got better at it.

One of three rural commercial businesses in the town of Scholls came up, and we opened our doors on Jan. 2, 2004, as Scholls Public House.

I couldn’t build a brick oven out there, so I got an electric oven and we started making pizza in March of that year. And then…crickets. Our best night in those first months was 25, maybe 30, pies.

It was pizza out there in the middle of nowhere.

One night we sold three pizzas.

Word got around. Next thing you know, people from Portland were driving out. It went from zero to 60 overnight. It got kinda crazy. I’d be making pizza, and all the neighbors started yelling at me that I had to get these cars off the side of the highway. We started receiving letters about a month later from Washington County, saying that if we didn’t address this situation immediately, we would be responsible for fines of $1,000 a day. There was no way out.

It’s still hard for me to drive out there. The bad memories of that year, because we had people around us who we thought were our friends. But, in the game of country politics, they had to turn their backs on us.

My wife, Kimberlee Nyland, and I started looking at Craigslist ads for a turnkey restaurant in Portland…and we found this place. We closed our doors in Scholls on Dec. 30, 2004, so we didn’t even make it one year.

In the pole barn, I’d built a wood-fired oven. At the Public House we couldn’t build an oven. Baker’s Pride had just come out with a standard-size electric deck oven—before that they’d always been countertop— and it allowed you to control the temperature much more precisely, and it stayed hot, unlike gas where you lose the heat when you opened the door. We could get it to extremely hot temperatures. After I’d baked in that electric oven for a week, I’d never go back to wood.

Back east, it’s very common to get a plain pie—it’s normal. It seems like a West Coast model is that the toppings define the pizza. Our whole process was

modeled off achieving the perfect plain pie. The thickness, the ratio of sauce and cheese—we wanted all that to balance out.

Out in Scholls, a lot of people wanted to put everything on the pizza. People were like, ‘This is a mess.’ And it’s like, ‘Yeah, it’s going to be a mess if it’s weighted up with stuff on top.’ So we decided to restrict what people can do—three toppings, max.

I knew for sure they’re going to start calling me the Pizza Nazi. Everybody thinks they’re original, like, ‘Oh, have you seen the Soup Nazi episode of Seinfeld?’ Yeah, man, duh. Other people thought that we were being very pretentious or we don’t care about customer service. You name it, I’ve heard it.

I grew up eating sausage and hot cherry pepper pies—I always liked them.

When we first opened we bought sausage from a local butcher, but it was inconsistent. It was just like, ‘This batch is salt and meat.’ Finally they said, ‘You know exactly what flavor profile you want, why not just make your own sausage?’ The recipe for the sausage has not changed in 11 years. We add sambuca to accentuate that fennel flavor—the fennel flavor is what I want in Italian sausage—and it adds that little bit of sweetness that rounds off the spice.

We fell in love with Mama Lil’s peppers. Man, were they good. I looked at the price tag and I was like, ‘Man, are they expensive!’ Back then, the 5-pound pail was between $30 and $35. They’re $90 now. But they had a tooth to them. They had a little more spice, it wasn’t as vinegary and acidic as now.

We were the first place to put sausage and Mama Lil’s together. Now, what place doesn’t do it?

They were so good back then. They were worth it. But the company sold, and we just kept watching the quality go down and the price go up. So I was like, ‘Screw this, I’ll just take them off the menu.’ I was a little hard-headed about it. Oh my God, people freaked out.

I know my servers hated me. They were begging me, ‘Please put it back on, I don’t want to hear another customer complain.’ We had people bringing in their own little jars of Mama Lil’s. We had regular customers just buying sausage pies for carry-out, and we knew they were putting their own Mama Lil’s on.

We just kept trying different peppers, and trying and trying different peppers—for a year. We liked this one but…but…but. Lots of buts. Even though Mama Lil’s is nowhere near as good as it used to be, and the price is skyrocketing, I decided we needed to just go back. We’d made our point. But I wish I could get that guy who made the peppers originally—the guy who sold—to make them for me the way they used to be.

Man, were they good. If you didn’t have them, like, seven years ago, you don’t even know.”

Vegan Friendly

Open 11-10

Everyday

500 NW 21st Ave, (503) 208-2173 kungpowpdx.com

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I L L U S T R AT I O N S B Y W H I T N E Y S A L G A D O

CULTURE

The Replacements MEET THE BRAND-NEW BLAZERS.

BY CO R B I N S M I T H

@corbinasmith

Like a speeding L-Train rolling down the track, he’s gone and he’s never coming back. LaMarcus Aldridge decided the Trail Blazers didn’t have what he wanted and left for San Antonio, searching for championship self-actualization and a lower income-tax rate. Then, everyone else left or got shuttled out right behind him. Wes Matthews. Robin Lopez. Arron Afflalo. Nicolas Batum. Steve Blake. Joel Freeland. Alonzo Gee. All gone.

This exodus has left the Blazers—barring a shocking breakout seasons from half the damn roster or something—destitute and broken.

There is no objective reason to believe they are going to be competitive this season. They will hemorrhage away leads, create brick houses, play fourth quarters where they float into the river and sink, like an old, rusted-out barge.

That’s not to say, though, that it’s going to be a waste. Tickets will be cheap on that old secondhand market (take the whole family!), and the team is flush with young talent and flexibility. The Blazers have been so same-y for the last three seasons, running an offense around Aldridge’s extraordinarily boring gifts and limitations, that the prospect of watching a new thing come together around Damian Lillard and a primordial ooze of mishmashed new role players could be as interesting as the last thing.

But who are these new players? What do they do? What could they do? Here is a cursory introduction of the newest Trayzers (™Corbin Smith), in alphabetical order:

AL-FAROUQ AMINU

(Forward) PAST LIVES: Los Angeles Clippers, New Orleans Pelicans, Dallas Mavericks.

The first free agent signed by the Blazers this summer, Al-Farouq Aminu is a monster defender of wings and power forwards, but he has traditionally struggled to provide offensive value. A player with his defensive skill set is expected, in the modern game, to shoot threes at a decent clip and assist in spacing the floor, but Aminu only managed a 27 percent mark last season. But he’s only 25, about as young as a dude on his second contract can be, and could still manage to put a decent shot together. I wouldn’t bet my condo on it, though.

SORT OF RESEMBLES: A larger Tony Allen with less offensive ability.

BEST-CASE SCENARIO: Shooting improves, becomes a valuable 3-and-D piece.

WORST-CASE SCENARIO: Does not improve shooting, remains a pretty valuable piece.

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ED DAVIS

GERALD HENDERSON

(Power forward) PAST LIVES: Toronto Raptors, Memphis Grizzlies, L.A. Lakers.

Ed Davis is an NBA power forward, like his father, Terry, before him. His children will be NBA power forwards, and their children as well. He rebounds, but not extraordinarily well. He shoots, but not from 3-point range. He isn’t a plus defender, but the boat isn’t going to sink if he’s in the hull.

He keeps his head low, so he can play until he retires. There is a silent nobility in all mediocrity.

BEST-CASE SCENARIO: Remains Ed Davis.

WORST CASE SCENARIO: Remains Ed Davis.

SORT OF RESEMBLES: Ed Davis.

(Shooting guard) PAST LIVES: Charlotte Bobcats/Hornets.

Gerald Henderson is perhaps the most standard possible NBA player. He plays on the wing, makes about a third of his 3-point shots and is not regarded as a catastrophe in any one phase of the game. He was on the 2011-12 Charlotte Bobcats squad that holds the distinction of being the worst NBA team of all time, winning-percentage-wise. He also dunked on Dwight Howard once.

SORT OF RESEMBLES: Literally every NBA player.

BEST-CASE SCENARIO: Plays in the NBA for another 10 years, drifting from team to team, making the playoffs about 40 percent of the time.

WORST-CASE SCENARIO: The same, but spends two years in China.

PAT CONNAUGHTON

MAURICE HARKLESS

(Shooting guard/small forward) PAST LIVES: Notre Dame, Aberdeen IronBirds.

A draft pick for both the Blazers and the Baltimore Orioles, Pat Connaughton is an extraordinary athlete. The right-handed pitching prospect allegedly has 96-mph fastball and has flashed some potential with his offspeed stuff. Unfortunately for the Orange Birds, he has chosen to forsake the life of a minor-league grinder and pursue the more immediate gratification of playing in the NBA. He was an able shooter in college, and has the physical profile to be a good defender.

SORT OF RESEMBLES: Danny Ainge, but only because they’re both white and played baseball. Practically, he resembles K.J. McDaniels, a wicked athletic wing who plays for the Houston Rockets.

BEST-CASE SCENARIO: He’s a 3-and-D wing who occasionally gets a sick block at the rim.

WORST-CASE SCENARIO: He becomes a 32-year-old middle reliever in the Diamondbacks’ system.

(Small forward) PAST LIVES: Orlando Magic.

Maurice Harkless is a wing with a penchant for exciting plays and inconsistency. His minutes and production bombed out last season, and he will be scoping out a return to the modest glory of his first two seasons in the league.

SORT OF RESEMBLES: Will Barton, but with more minutes played and less stringy energy.

BEST-CASE SCENARIO: Discovers some consistent skill he can exploit, has lengthy NBA career.

WORST-CASE SCENARIO: Chinese Basketball Association.

503-334-3570

MASON PLUMLEE (Center) PAST LIVES: Duke, Brooklyn Nets.

A member of the Duke Plumlees, Mason is probably the best player acquired by the Blazers this offseason. He is big center with some modest mobility and decent rim-protecting ability.

He also sort of looks like a man made of slate. His brother, Miles, has a more environment-appropriate, hip-boy-type haircut. Mason is the proud owner of a FIBA world championship gold medal that would rightly be hung around Damian Lillard’s neck if not for Coach K-related nepotism.

SORT OF RESEMBLES: A more athletic but less charming Robin Lopez.

BEST-CASE SCENARIO: Improves his free-throw shooting and further sharpens his defensive skills, becomes a top-10 center in the NBA. WORST-CASE SCENARIO: An eccentric oil baron dedicates himself to hunting the Plumlee brothers one after another with traps and crossbows. Makes Mason’s leg into a lamp.

NOAH VONLEH

(Power forward) PAST LIVES: Charlotte Hornets (barely).

In exchange for Nic Batum, the Blazers received Gerald Henderson and Noah Vonleh, a 20-year-old power forward who spent last season riding pine (he played 259 minutes!) for the Charlotte Hornets. He is athletic, long-armed and has modest shooting abilities. He was, once, the sort of player who oozed potential, a perfect upside acquisition for a rebuilding team. Unfortunately for the Blazers, Vonleh moved to the woods to live out the rest of his days in shame after Duke-bred, sharp-shooting L.A. Lakers forward Ryan Kelly notched a game-winning dunk right in his face this preseason. It’s a real disappointment for the team, I’m sure, but it was the only way he could save face in light of an incident that embarrassing. We wish him well in exile.

SORT OF RESEMBLES: The platonic idea of “rawness” in an NBA athlete.

BEST-CASE SCENARIO: Improves in every aspect of the game, becomes an All-Star.

WORST-CASE SCENARIO: Does not improve, washes out of the NBA and into selling insurance.

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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2013, 4th hottest year ever.

2014, hottest year ever.

2015, even hotter: hottest year in 4000 years.

Oregon: We have a problem, and I need your vote to help fix it.

Let’s get to the solutions—no new fossil fuel energy infrastructure.

No new pipelines, no oil trains, get the coal out of our electricity.

No more denial.

Lets do it in 2016.

Julianbellforgovernor2016.com julianbellforgovernor2016@gmail.com

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STREET

MONTAVILLA

Photos by Emily Joa n Gr EEn E wweek.com/street

OUR FAVORITE LOOKS THIS WEEK.

Day of the Dead fixed Dinner,

November 2

Now taking reservations

Lunch & Brunch Monday to Friday 11:30am-3pm

La Calaca Comelona 2304 SE Belmont | 503-239-9675 4-10pm Mon–Sat Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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“You ever have a dream where it’s your uncle but he talks like your cat?” page 37

JJ GONSON

YEAST MODE: Mary Numair, a 29-yearold employee at Purrington’s Cat Cafe, had had enough of the antichoice protesters amassed in front of Planned Parenthood on Sunday, Oct. 25.

So she made a sign that read, “Dear P.P. Thanks for helping me with my yeast infections!” and stood in the middle of protesters, chanting, “Yeast infection! Yeast infection!” The protesters left and Numair’s Twitter feed blew up. Both Slate and BuzzFeed reported the story. Numair was surprised at the response: “People seem to be really excited to talk about yeast infections.” Jimmy Radosta, spokesman for Planned Parenthood Columbia Willamette, says the protest targeted Planned Parenthood centers across the state: “These protests are designed to intimidate the many patients who seek basic health care services from Planned Parenthood, including lifesaving cancer screenings, testing for HIV, treatment for STDs, family planning and birth control.”

GUITAR HEROES: The acoustic guitar used by Elliott Smith while writing and recording his first solo album, 1994’s Roman Candle, was sold to a Seattle collector for $35,000. The seller, JJ Gonson, a former housemate of Smith’s currently residing in Boston, had initially purchased the Le Domino guitar from Southeast Portland’s Artichoke Community Music in the early 1990s. Smith borrowed the guitar—small enough it’s almost a novelty instrument—to experiment with the lo-fi recording process that created the distinctive sound of his debut record.

Before going to its buyer, the instrument will be on display Oct. 29-31 at BlackBook Guitars on North Mississippi Avenue.

KOOL THING: On Thursday, Oct. 22, Portland witnessed the birth of a new music venue…maybe. The central eastside’s Bit House Saloon converted its second floor—once home to a boxing ring—into a concert venue for a floor-bouncing, largely unannounced Kool Keith show with a capacity crowd.

“It’s special events for now,” says bar manager and co-owner Jesse Card. “But it’s something we’re exploring, largely because of the success of that party.” The Kool Keith show was part of Portland Cocktail Week, which meant it was open mostly to local service industry vets and out-of-town bartenders. It also meant there was a two-story ice luge delivering shots of cognac on the back patio. >> Shuttered Old Town landmark Berbati’s, meanwhile, is splitting in two. Opaline’s, in the Ankeny alley, has already quietly opened for late-night breakfast and will also serve weekend brunch. Tryst, next door, will be a bar with a dance floor. Both are owned by Adazoe Freeman and Eric L. Rose.

HIGH JACK: Jackpot Records is adding 125,000 vinyl LPs and 45s to its inventory—one of the biggest record buys in Portland history, according to store owner Isaac Slusarenko. The collection was procured from John Larson, owner of the recently shuttered Sonic Recollections on Southeast Belmont Street.

“It was floor to ceiling, stacked in moving boxes on the entire bottom floor of [Larson’s] house,” Slusarenko says. Among the gems already extracted are rare albums from Roy Orbison and Phish, a Star Wars Christmas record, and “Dance the Slurp,” a promotional single released by 7-Eleven in the ’70s.

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@MARYNUMAIR/TWITTER

STARTERS

BITE-SIZED PORTLAND CULTURE NEWS.

I L L U S T R AT I O N S B Y W H I T N E Y S A L G A D O

GO: Ed Davis and the Portland Trail Blazers open their season against Alonzo Gee and the New Orleans Pelicans on Wednesday, Oct. 28, at Moda Center, 1 N Center Court St. 7 pm. $15-$265.

Steve Blake

Arron Afflalo

Current team: Detroit Pistons.

Reason for leaving: No one likes Steve Blake.

Appropriate reaction: Standing ovation.

The Blazers felt the sting of rejection over and over this summer. Blake can relate—the organization has traded him three times now, most recently for two even whiter white guys. Face it, Portland: You are Steve Blake, and Steve Blake is you. Show him the love you’ve both been deprived, then cry into each other’s arms when he inevitably gets traded back here again.

First game in Portland: Nov. 8.

Current team: New York Knicks.

Reason for leaving: Journeyman gonna journey.

Appropriate reaction: Aggressive sighing. You may have already forgotten, but Afflalo was the midseason acquisition that was supposed to bolster the Blazers’ bench for a deep postseason run. That, uh, didn’t happen. It wasn’t really his fault, but it was not not his fault.

First game in Portland: Dec. 12.

Nic Batum Current team: Charlotte Hornets.

Reason for leaving: Someone had to get traded.

Appropriate reaction: Big applause. Sure, he was always more about “potential” than consistent production. And, yeah, he tried to ditch Portland for Minnesota in 2012. But he once punched a Spaniard in the nards in the middle of an international game. His jersey should be retired for that alone.

First game in Portland: Jan. 29.

SHOULD YOU CHEER OR SHOULD YOU BOO ?

A GUIDE TO HOW YOU SHOULD FEEL ABOUT EACH EX-BLAZER THIS SEASON.

BY MATTHEW SIN GER

WILLAMETTE WEEK

HEADOUT WHAT TO DO THIS WEEK IN ARTS & CULTURE

WEDNESDAY OCT. 28 STRIP CLUB HAUNTED HOUSE [BOO(BS)!] In the combo that’s fueled the entire careers of Rob Zombie and Robert Rodriguez, strip-club DJ Dick Hennessy built a haunted house in the upper deck of Old Town’s Spyce Gentlemen’s Club. There will be blood. And there will be boobs.

Spyce Gentlemen’s Club, 33 NW 2nd Ave., 243-4646. 10 pm.

Through Oct. 29. $10.

THURSDAY OCT. 29 DILLY DALLY [NOISE POP] While the Toronto band raids the picked-over tombs of the Pixies, Nirvana and Hole for its buzzed and fuzzy brand of poppish punk, it is the rare heir that adds to the legacy of its forebears. Its debut, Sore, is one of 2015’s best albums, an electrifying collection lifted to sublimity by lead singer Katie Monks. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 3282865. 9:30 pm. $8. 21+.

SATURDAY OCT. 31

LaMarcus Aldridge Current team: San Antonio Spurs.

Reason for leaving: He really missed his mother’s casserole.

Appropriate reaction: Golf claps. If we learned one thing about L.A. this summer, it’s that he craves more attention than his lobotomized personality would suggest. Your impulse might be to jeer, but if you really want to express your displeasure with him for “going home,” a light smattering of apathy would probably get to him more than anything.

First game in Portland: Nov. 11.

THE GHOSTBUSTERS BALL [BILL MURRAY] This city is headed for a disaster of biblical proportions. So you might as well put on your backpack and tan onesie and get slimed with four XRAY.fm DJs of Dig A Pony notoriety. With cheap Eagle Lodge liquor, by night’s end someone might ask you, “Are you a god?” for real. East Portland Eagle Lodge, 4904 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 232-7505. 9 pm. $10.

10TH ANNUAL ZOMBIE WALK [WALKING DEAD] Covering Chihuahuas in fake blood and terrorizing Japanese tourists outside Abercrombie & Fitch just never gets old. Or rich—the Walk’s gofundme.com campaign for legit permitting is dead. Turns out zombies aren’t philanthropic, or concerned by city ordinances.

Pioneer Courthouse Square, 701 SW 6th Ave. 2 pm. Free.

MONDAY NOV. 2 L7 [CLASSIC GRUNGE] While its adherence to scuzzy simplicity kept L7 from reaching the audience many of its ’90s peers did, that dogged determination to stick with what works—in its case, rough-hewn rage—bodes well for the new songs dotting the set list on the band’s first tour in 14 years. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 8 pm. $24.50 advance, $29.50 day of show. All ages.

TUESDAY NOV. 3 Wesley Matthews Current team: Dallas Mavericks.

Reason for leaving: He won the ultimate game of Shark Tank.

Appropriate reaction: Lots of whooing. Losing Matthews hurt, but you can’t begrudge a dude coming off a career-altering injury for taking $70 million of Mark Cuban’s money. You’ll always be our Iron Man, Wes. As long as you never wear that plastic Iron Man mask in public again. That was corny.

First game in Portland: Dec. 1.

Alonzo Gee Current team: New Orleans Pelicans.

Reason for leaving: He’s Alonzo Gee. Appropriate reaction: Walk to the exit because it’s probably garbage time. Don’t cry for Gee Unit, he’s with Anthony Davis now.

First game in Portland: Oct. 28.

Robin Lopez Current team: New York Knicks.

Reason for leaving Portland: He wanted to make sure he could see The Force Awakens in Brooklyn with his brother.

Appropriate reaction: Thundering boos. We thought he was one of us. He read comic books. He went record shopping with Carrie Brownstein. He compared the Blazers to The Goonies. We thought he’d never want to play anywhere else. Instead, he bolted at the first opportunity for the bright lights of the flaming tire fire that is the Knicks. Fuck you and your wizards, RoLo. We never even liked Harry Potter that much, anyway.

First game in Portland: Dec. 12.

EL VY [OHIO MEETS PDX] For a project pairing the National’s moody mumbler Matt Berninger with Ramona Falls’ sad-boy Brent Knopf, El Vy is hardly the supreme bummer you’d imagine.

Instead, it’s a swaggering, surrealist romp far removed from either participant’s main gig. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 2319663. 9 pm. $25 advance, $27 day of show. 21+.

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FOOD & DRINK = WW Pick.

REVIEW K AY L A S P R I N T

Highly recommended.

By MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.

THURSDAY, OCT. 29 The Curse of the Curds

I

Shandong www.shandongportland.com

Chefs from five Oregon breweries— including Fat Head’s and 10 Barrel— will face off in a poutine pop-up competition. And for a mere $10 donation to Sisters of the Road, you get to try all five. Deschutes Brewery Portland Public House, 210 NW 11th Ave., 296-4906. 11 am. $10.

SUNDAY, NOV. 1 2nd Annual Dia de los Muertos Festival de Cervezas

At Bazi Bierbrasserie and nearby Imperial Bottle Shop & Taproom (3090 SE Division St.), all hell will break loose on the Mexican day of the dead, with more than 20 themed www.shandongportland.com beers, ciders and wines ranging from Belgium’s Brouwerij Het Anker Lucifer Black to a Mexican-style lager from 21st Amendment. It’s $10 for a glass and two tastes, $2 for each additional five-ounce taste. Bazi Bierbrasserie, 1522 SE 32nd Ave., 234-8888. 1 pm.

Shandong MONDAY, NOV. 2 International Sherry Week

Portland’s best home to sherry will host a week-long celebration with special flights, from a $15 intro flight to a rare vertical Palmas tasting.

Bar Vivant, 2225 E Burnside St., 971-271-7166. Also Nov. 3.

1. Imperial

410 SW Broadway, 228-7222, imperialpdx.com.

Imperial has one of the best fried chicken dishes you’ll ever eat, with barrel-aged hot sauce and honey from beehives on the roof. The bird drips with juices inside a golden-brown and buttery shell that crackles like paper under a fork.

2. St. Jack

1610 NW 23rd Ave., 360-1281, stjackpdx.com.

St. Jack guts and debones its own Oregon trout—apparently sous chef Amanda Williams is the fastest, at 45 seconds, for a whole trout. Anyway, it’s good. You should eat it.

3. Mediterranean Exploration Company

333 NW 13th Ave., 222-0906, mediterraneanexplorationcompany.com.

Your best fall meat pie is here: the El Baboor lamb kebab, a comforting cassolette turned into a pot pie with sesame-flecked pita and juicy pieces of smoky, gamey lamb in a thick, fireroasted tomato sauce.

4. P.R.E.A.M.

2131 SE 11th Ave., 231-2809, preampizza.com.

This spot’s new, but it’s already in the top five list for Portland pizza on any list that matters. The classically soft Neapolitan crust is made with double zero flour, proofed for 72 hours and baked at about 900 degrees in an Acunto Gianni oven. And it’s very good.

5. Burrasca

2032 SE Clinton St., 236-7791, burrascapdx.com.

Serving up a tagliatelle pasta with traditional meat ragu is like standing naked, with all your flaws and virtues apparent to anyone who takes note.

Well…Burrasca looks good naked.

(For full write-ups on this top 5, check out our Restaurant Guide, out this week in bars, restaurants, Powell’s and special boxes around town.)

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CANADA SWEET: The Maple Parlor’s maple froyo with candied bacon.

The Maple Parlor

We must have reached peak dietary restriction in Portland, right? I have no data to back that up, but between oft-overlapping aversions to gluten, nuts and animal products, it seems like nearly everyone has something they can’t eat. (Full disclosure: I am allergic to shellfish.)

And thus, Hawthorne’s new Maple Parlor, “an inclusive sundae bar” that upgrades the old Swirl space with a selection of eight frozen desserts ranging from old-fashioned full-fat ice cream to Paleo-friendly coconut-milk froyo, with gluten-free, vegan and diabetic options in between.

The little blue-hued parlor comes from April Eklund, whose family owns Sellwood’s Jade Bistro, and on our visit had a huge range of flavors, including a basic tart and a cashew-based pumpkin pie flavor that should appease the vegans behind the change.org petition demanding Starbucks make a plant-based pumpkin spice latte. It’s by bowl, not weight, with a soda canwide mini bowl going for $2.50 and a soup bowl running $6.75.

(These prices may change after one of the dudes hanging outside with a pit bull on a rope leash manages a foot-tall tower.)

The signature flavor is maple, which conjures in my mind a sticky-sweet and vaguely Canadian mess. But the maple flavor here is soft and light, almost woody, and works very well with the available toppings—especially with pumpkin whip, a squirt of peanut butter sauce and a spoonful of candied bacon.

Yup, maple and bacon. Remember that combo? It’s a Portland classic, harkening to simpler times in these parts. MARTIN CIZMAR. EAT: The Maple Parlor, 3538 SE Hawthorne Blvd. 206-4757, themapleparlor.com. Noon-9 pm Tuesday-Thursday, noon-10 pm Friday-Saturday, noon-6 pm Sunday.

DRANK

Szech ’n Brett (LOGSDON FARMHOUSE ALES) When it opened in 2011, Logsdon quickly won a reputation for making truly superb farmhouse ales.

In fact, the fresh-hop seizoen from Dave Logsdon’s farmstead brewhouse was named our Beer of the Year that December. But things have changed. After long rumblings about ownership changes, in July the New School beer blog announced that brewer Chuck Porter was leaving and the brewery was being bought

by Southwest Portland’s Uptown Market and original investor John Plutshack, who owns Tin Bucket. Portland Mercury writer Brian Yaeger later accused the New School of “misreporting” the sale and said that Logsdon would keep control. So what’s going on there?

Based on an email from Logsdon, it seems the sale correctly reported by the New School was canceled, but could be back on the table. (“Partnering with Uptown was being considered, along with options that would keep the [company with its] the original investors,” says Logsdon. “No final decision has been made to date, and discussion of all options do remain on the table at this time.”)

The beer might be suffering from the distractions. My most recent batch of Szech ’n Brett, a 6.5 percent ABV Brett saison that debuted just after Porter’s exit, was a gusher, exploding foam out of a cool, still bottle and pouring with more head than beer. Sichuan and pink peppercorns in the ale provided more heat in the digestive tract than spice on the tongue, and the lingering flavor was overripe peach flesh with a little of the bitter, nutty pit. Not recommended. MARTIN CIZMAR.

K AY L A S P R I N T

REVIEW

SAN DIEGO CHIC: Rocio’s has a nice room.

Bailar La Bamba ROCIO’S ISN’T YET THE EXCELLENT CASUAL MIDRANGE MEXICAN JOINT PORTLAND NEEDS.

the menu. On our visit, this amounted to a bowl of underripe mango in a bracingly sweet juice.

The disappointment continued with the

BY M A RT I N C I Z M A R mcizmar@wweek.com cocktails. A Mexican coffee had as much flavorless foam as fluid, and gave me nothing but flat There are people who will tell you Portland bitterness. A margarita tasted like something you could make with a bottled mix. lacks for good Mexican food.

The best and worst things on the menu are They’re wrong, of course. The city has a few spots with great budget taqueria fare (Santa Cruz, the $3.50 street tacos. Though the best tacos usuAngel Food & Fun, Taqueria Portland), solid mid- ally cost $1 or $2, I’m fine with $3.50 street tacos range bougie-Mex (¿Por Que No?, Stella Taco, Mi provided they’re packed with flavor. But only the Mero Mole) and a few fantastic high-end restau- carne asada gets close to the standard set by places rants (Taqueria Nueve, Nuestra Cocina). Pick up a like ¿Por Que No?. It was smoky, fatty and delicopy of our Restaurant Guide, out today, and you’ll cious, topped with finely chopped cilantro and a find all our favorites—from dives with $1 carnitas brightening green salsa. A fried-fish taco was also tasty, though it needed more tacos to a place that hand acid to contrast with the thick mills masa in house to fry up Order this: Carne asada tacos, mole chips for $16 guacamole. breading and creamy sauce. chicken, Negra Modelo and dessert.

But Portland’s Mexican Among the others, overcooked chicken tasted a lot offerings are lacking in a very like the overcooked carnitas, specific way: We don’t have any really good sit-down family Mexican places. I’m and crispy-shelled tacos with shredded iceberg talking about those decidedly outmoded places with lettuce had nothing to recommend beyond nostalcomfy booths, free chips and frozen margaritas in gia for Taco Tuesdays past.

They’re trying to branch out, though. Elotes— oversized glassware. The kind of place you get a chia cob of corn cut in half for $4—tasted green and michanga or chile Colorado and a bottomless soda.

Given that my wife drags me around the corner undercooked. It was covered in way too much to the bright pink La Bamba on Southeast Powell cheese with no hint of lime or salt.

Boulevard once a month, I was pretty excited about As far as larger and pricier entrees go, it’s hit and miss. Pork chile verde ($14) in a the prospect of Rocio’s.

Rocio’s comes from Rocio Meza, daughter of tomatillo sauce was flat, salty and, through a San Diego restaurateur who ran one of those much of my meal, without tortillas. I did like vaunted institutions de enchiladas. Her new the mole chicken ($14), a super-chocolaty and spot opened on Southeast Gladstone Street in rather sweet sauce that complemented a moist July, looking very much like the sort of updated half-chicken. Double down on sweetness with take we need here—more sophisticated environs buñuelos con helado, a plate-sized round of and slightly more upscale ingredients. fried bread with lots of honey and a generous It certainly looks the part, with a wall of tilt-out scoop of ice cream ($5). windows, stylish mission chairs and a handsome, Then again, you can get good desserts at La oversized, X-shaped modern chandelier hanging Bamba, too, along with a burrito Michoacan that over the middle of the room. But, after three visits I prefer to anything at Rocio’s. We were there just covering most of the menu, I’m disappointed. a couple nights ago; we cannot escape it.

That starts with the complimentary salsa, an orangish-red concoction that tastes canned even EAT: Rocio’s, 2850 SE Gladstone St., 971-266-8860, rociospdx.com. 11:30 am-10 pm though it is not. But better to stick with it than Monday-Saturday. upgrade to a ceviche con frutas, since removed from

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Little goblins welcome till 9 938 N Cook St Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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MUSIC PROFILE

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

DEIRDRE O’CALLAGHAN

Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and socalled convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines.

Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to wweek.com/ submitevents and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: msinger@wweek.com.

Fax: 243-1115.

S (Jenn Ghetto)

[BEDROOM CONFESSIONS] Band of Horses and Grand Archives weren’t the only byproducts owing to the unexpected disintegration of slowcore heroes Carissa’s Wierd. Founding member Jenn Ghetto went on to release a spell of homespun, melodic recordings under the moniker S after the band split in 2003, retaining her affinity for near-whispered vocals and cascading arpeggios throughout four records of plainspoken anguish.

Cool Choices, though more polished given its ace production, still revels in that numbed fatigue. It aches with hushed, broken sentiments against desolate electric guitar and piano, and while Ghetto’s stark honesty can be jarring at times, it’s certainly no facade. BRANDON WIDDER. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave. 9:30 pm. $10. 21+.

Mac Demarco, Alex Calder

bling his supporting cast to record a full-length follow-up to his acclaimed Another One EP. Trading the fourtrack production and comedic turns of his early albums for sincere ballads, the self-described purveyor of “jizz-jazz” remains iconoclastic, crafting catchy pop hooks for the Captured Tracks label at a far-flung New York beach house. Despite requisite onstage noodling, Demarco’s fuzzy and deceptively simple songcraft is a throwback to pre-Wingsera McCartney, betraying his status as a modern college-rock icon with touches of saccharine harmonies and ramshackle fun. WYATT SCHAFFNER. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St. 9 pm. Sold out. All ages.

Tav Falco’s Panther Burns, Mike Watt, Toby Dammit

MOON MEN: El Vy’s Brent Knopf (left) and Matt Berninger.

Weird Rainbows

[PUNKABILLY] With a voice like the butt of a cigarette and a truly terrifying face, Tav Falco never exactly had stardom in his future. Despite

[SLACK-LINE SOUL] Gap-toothed vagabond singer-songwriter Mac Demarco is making his second soldout stop at the Crystal Ballroom this year. Despite his derelict chic, Demarco is among the hardestworking and most seasoned touring musicians out there, hitting the road after assem-

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THE BEST INSANE CLOWN POSSE SONGS EVER, IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER “Another Love Song” (The Amazing Jeckel Brothers, 1999) The best album of ICP’s ’90s output has a ton of highlights, but this take on Alanis Morissette and Sheryl Crow-style alt-pop is both a hilarious parody and an excellent showcase of Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope’s incredible pop songwriting skills, which they wield prominently in later albums.

2 “Crystal Ball” (Bizaar/Bizzar, 2000)

The last song on any ICP album is, without fail, one of its best. “Crystal Ball,” featuring the duo’s protégés Twiztid, combines long-form cloud rap with just enough downbeat new age tribalism to keep things tastefully 2000.

3 “Manic Depressive” (Hell’s Pit, 2004) Many of Insane Clown Posse’s strongest tracks from their first few albums cross trip-hop with the murky horror themes a la early Three 6 Mafia. On perhaps the most restrained song in their catalog, the stripped-down production combined with J and Shaggy’s despondent delivery makes “Manic Depressive” one of the best examples of this particular era of the group. And, true to wicked clown form, it’s capped by a tastelessly obnoxious skit.

4 “Freaky Creep Show” (Bang! Boom! Pow! [Red Edition], 2009)” This is where Insane Clown Posse (mostly) set aside the pretense that they are a rap group first, and embrace the weirdo pop music that they truly excel at.

Putting an unnerving carnival spin on ’70s psych and occult rock, “Freaky Creep Show” introduces the world to the modern—and best—incarnation of ICP. 5 “I Fucked a Cop” (The Marvelous Missing Link: Found, 2015)

J and Shaggy are infamous for the unrelenting vulgarity and cartoon violence of their ’90s material. A throwback to the winding narrative rap of their early days, “I Fucked a Cop” is hilariously puerile and potentially the most gleefully idiotic song ever recorded. WALKER MACMURDO. MORE: Just in time for Halloween, we made our intern listen to every Insane Clown Posse album and rank them from best to worst. See his list at wweek.com.

“WICKED” RICK VODICKA

WEDNESDAY, OCT. 28

MENOMENA + THE NATIONAL = EL VY. JUST DON’T CALL IT A BAND.

BY MATTHEW SIN GER

msinger@wweek.com

Brent Knopf sounds frazzled. It’s midafternoon, and the former Menomena member has been in rehearsals all day, preparing for the first-ever live shows with his new band, El Vy. In a few hours, his bandmate, the National’s Matt Berninger, flies home to Ohio, and when they next see each other, it’ll be in the studios of KCRW in Santa Monica, where they’ll play many of their songs for the first time, live on the air. Time is exceedingly of the essence.

For a project coming together in such a rush, El Vy had a long gestation period. About five years ago, Knopf began sending Berninger scraps of song ideas leftover from his main gig, Ramona Falls. After amassing 400-plus bits of music, and with the National taking an extra year off, they finally decided to turn their work into something. Return to the Moon, the group’s debut, isn’t what you might expect from two musicians who typically dabble in the brooding and emotionally bruised. It is, instead, swaggering and slightly surreal art pop. But, as Knopf told us in a small window between practice and lunch, don’t expect it to last too long.

WW: Matt says El Vy is a collaboration, not a second band. What’s the difference?

Brent Knopf: With a second band, it’s like a whole new process of trying to grow the band and stay at it month after month, year after year. Instead of us touring relentlessly over the next few years, these might be all the shows we play.

It’s a way of tamping down fan expectations.

Sure. And also trying to keep National fans from murdering me.

Over the years, you sent Matt something like 450 different musical ideas. What did those entail?

It could be anything from a four-minute-long, pretty fleshed-out, multilayered piece with rhythm and bass and keys and guitar to a 20-second-long guitar

loop recorded on the fly in a car somewhere. What surprised me is some of the things Matt gravitated to was stuff I was almost too embarrassed to send.

He’s amazing at following his instincts and zeroing in on the heart and soul of the song.

How did you know something wasn’t right for Menomena or Ramona Falls but might work for El Vy? It was really more first come, first served. These are the ideas that were left over. But we also wrote new stuff once we started working together. I remember I was sick last year around the holidays.

I emerged to try to do something productive, and I just banged on the piano for a while. I recorded what I did, not thinking it would turn into anything. And [Berninger] just dove right in that same day and wrote “Paul Is Alive” while he was visiting his family in Cincinnati for Christmas.

Matt’s called this his most personal album.

Well, I think he means the most autobiographical, which is slightly different. All the names and places are real, but they’re connected in ways that aren’t real. You ever have a dream where it’s your uncle but he’s wearing your best friend’s clothes and he talks like your cat? It’s like that.

Are there any lyrics on the record that made you go, “What the fuck, dude?”

[Laughs] I don’t feel like he has to answer to me in any way. I think I did ask him about “a saltwater fish to a colorblind witch.” He was like, “You know, saltwater fish are more colorful. He’s giving a gift the person can’t appreciate.”

What are you ultimately hoping to get out of this project that you can’t with Ramona Falls?

The joy of bringing songs to life—taking these embryonic, rough-edged snippets and trying to hear beyond them and follow the song wherever it may lead. Berninger is a particularly great co-pilot for that.

And it’s fascinating to see that when you combine my gloomy sensibilities with his gloomy sensibilities, you end up with this weird rainbow.

SEE IT: El Vy plays Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., on Monday and Tuesday, Nov. 2-3.

9 pm. $25 advance, $27 day of show. 21+.

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MUSIC

Emily Wells, Lorna Dune

[MUSICAL CHAMELEON] There isn’t much Emily Wells can’t do.

She’s a singer, arranger, producer, composer and multi-instrumentalist who somehow finds time to run her own label (Thesis & Instinct), on which her next LP will be released.

Raised in Texas and based in New York, Wells assembles experimental collages comprising violin, cello, synth and sample pads. There are subtle hints of classical training in her music, made lively thanks to vivacious loops and ambient background sounds. These days, the technology exists to make it easy for one person to present herself as a one-woman band, but Wells does so with deftness and hard-earned skill. MARK STOCK. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St. 9 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. 21+.

Sloan Martin

[INDIE DANCE] As the primary singer-songwriter behind Beach Fire, Portlander Sloan Martin blends elements of classic rock, experimentalism, psychedelia and piano pop. With a singing voice falling somewhere between Sting and Michael McDonald, Martin will have you shimmying (albeit carefully) in your seat, wine in hand.

HILARY SAUNDERS. Ed gefield , 2126 SW Halsey St. 7 pm. Free. 21+.

Riff Raff, MiMosa, I$$A

[JODY HIGHROLLER] “Bird on a Wire,” Riff Raff ’s 2012 collaboration with Harry Fraud and Action Bronson, is one of the absolute best rap songs of this decade.

Falling somewhere between a Southern strip-club jam and West Coast cloud-rap, Riff Raff ’s ultrastylized aesthetic has unfortunately gotten in the way of his abstract club anthems, and the poor showing of 2014’s Neon Icon did little to help. His live show, though, should be an excellent, high-energy blast. Bring friends. WALKER MACMURDO. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave. 8 pm. $23. All ages.

Heartless Bastards, Slothrust

[REFINED ROCK ’N’ ROLL] Erika Wennerstrom knows how to command a room—and a record.

She’s been the unmistakable powerhouse behind Heartless Bastards for more than a decade, balancing urgency with constraint into the Cincinnati group whenever it needed it most. To that end, she remains at the center of the group’s sonic expanse on its fifth LP, the recently released Restless Ones. It’s a pristine record, where traces of classic Americana trickle into what was once a lo-fi wheelhouse. Combative electric guitars and introspective lyricism pepper a record that, at times, can’t choose between arena-ready rock and aching honky-tonk. BRANDON WIDDER. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 9 pm. $18 advance, $20 day of show. All ages.

THURSDAY, OCT. 29 Dilly Dally

[GRUNGE POP] Dilly Dally raids the picked-over tombs of the Pixies,

Nirvana and Hole for its buzzed and fuzzy brand of pop-ish punk. But unlike so many of its contemporaries, who seem content to borrow a few trite signifiers and leave it at that, Dilly Dally is the rare heir that adds to the legacy of its forebears.

The Toronto band’s debut, Sore, is one of 2015’s best albums, an electrifying collection lifted to sublimity by lead singer Katie Monks, whose gruff slurs and wild howls make a wonderful mess of her words while lending a raw and shivering immediacy to every melody. This stuff touches the deep parts. CHRIS STAMM. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave. 9 pm. $8. 21+.

Windhand, Danava, Monolord

[STONER DOOM] Windhand’s brand of Electric Wizard-style grooves meanders along a little too pleasantly behind Dorthia Cottrell’s hypnotizing vocals. Although the band’s unusually smooth approach to this style of metal worked on its 2013 split with Cough, its Relapse Records debut, Soma, was a forgettable blur of recycled Sleep riffs.

You may need to put the “stoner” in “stoner doom” and smoke yourself into a stupor to make it through this show. WALKER MACMURDO. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 9 pm. $15 advance, $17 day of show. 21+.

Blowfly, Nekro Drunkz, Headless Pez, the Gods Themselves

[NASTY FLOW] The dirtiest old man in novelty R&B continues to ply his brand of eighth-grade juvenilia deep into his ‘70s. Heh, I said “deep.” Panic Room, 3100 SE Sandy Blvd. 8 pm. $12 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.

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FLASHBACK C O U R T E S Y O F R YA N S O L L E E

the nominal successes of his late ’70s Memphis contemporary (and sometimes bandmate) Alex Chilton, and the slight popularity of the Cramps—a band that one leaves out when discussing the sound of Falco’s Panther Burns—he remains one of those American Southern artists whose gothic sensibilities and crude, blown-out guitar are more popular in hellholes in places like Paris and Barcelona than they are here at home. Here’s a bonus, though: Mike Watt, of the Minutemen and lately the Stooges, is playing with and opening for Falco on this latest tour, in support of the new Panther Burns record, Command Performance. BRACE BELDEN. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St. 9 pm. $12. 21+.

Chicago Afrobeat Project

[BEAT REDEFINED] Chicago’s a town that’s endlessly assimilating a raft of sounds into something new and vibrant. For the Chicago Afrobeat Project, a troupe counting more than a dozen players, the past decade has served as a testing ground as the band has sought to expound on Fela-styled grooves. “Slippery People,” on the band’s Nyash UP! album, turns in expected rhythms, but also works in a bit of slide guitar and enough chatting to make it seem like an unknown Funkadelic track. And while Afrobeat’s form is still rather restrictive, the group has figured out how to personalize—and Midwesternize—the sound enough to offer something uniquely danceable. DAVE CANTOR. Goodfoot Pub & Lounge, 2845 SE Stark St. 10 pm. $10. 21+.

Mr. Twin Sister, Timothy the DJ

[DREAM DISCO] New York’s Mr. Twin Sister is a hard band to crack.

Its analogues are easy enough to identify: Cocteau Twins and Stereolab and Nellee Hooper productions, maybe Talk Talk and Roxy Music circa Avalon. But on the band’s self-titled 2014 debut, those inspirations congeal into something totally original—smooth and coolly detached, as primed for the loft party as the after-hours chill room, as transfixing for the same reasons that make it hard to pin down. Perhaps the post-show set from affiliate Timothy the DJ will help illuminate some of the crew’s mystery, but I wouldn’t bet on it.

MATTHEW SINGER. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St. 8:30 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. 21+.

The Builders & the Butchers at Valentines, 2007: “This is from our first record-release show. I remember being so amazed that we actually sold 20 records at the show. It was a really incredible night. Valentines was full of buddies, and we could barely hear ourselves over the singing along. This show was a culmination of a ton of work to finish our first record and was before we had gone on tour. At the end of the show, we took the crowd outside and then into Voodoo Doughnut, and immediately got kicked out. It’s really crazy to think of how much downtown and Portland in general has changed since this night. This was one of our last (mostly) unplugged shows at a venue, and I really miss shows like this.” —Singer-guitarist Ryan Sollee.

SEE IT: The Builders and the Butchers celebrate their 10th anniversary at Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., with Hillstomp, on Friday and Saturday, Oct. 30-31. 10 pm. $13. 21+.

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SONGWRITER’S CIRCLE WITH JACK MCMAHON, DENNY BIXBY & JOSHUA ENGLISH MONDAY, NOVEMBER 2ND AT 7PM

Joshua English got his sealegs at the helm of the laudable Boston-based pop trio Six Going On Seven. During their seven year existence, the band recorded three full-lengths, a handful of EPs and logged hundreds of shows with everyone from Karate to the Get Up Kids. Oregon Music Hall Of Fame Inductee Denny Bixby is an artist in the truest sense, in that he is always evolving in the ways of musical expression. Jack McMahon has been a performing singer-songwriter his entire adult life, including work with the legendary Brill Building and Columbia Records.

THE BLUES CABARET feat. EARL THOMAS & DAVE FLESCHNER FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 6TH AT 6PM

Dave’s the genius behind The Blues Cabaret, which is why he smartly enlisted renowned blues belter, Earl Thomas. Earl’s got songwriting and singing credits you just have to scroll through – Etta James, Montreux Jazz Fest, Grammy nominated, etcetera. But his voice on a Fleschner tune is a revelation.

MEET JOHN MALKOVICH! Record Store Day Black Friday At Music Millennium!

SUPERSUCKERS Holdin’ The Bag

SALE PRICED CD $10.99 The Supersuckers’ trademark balance of take-no-prisoners swagger and hard-headed introspection is reflected throughout Holdin’ the Bag. The album’s eleven songs find them in typically rocking form, while tapping deeply into the band’s longstanding affinity for country music, which has grown increasingly prominent in their output since 1997’s landmark Must’ve Been High. *sale price valid 10/28-11/30

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MUSIC The Internet

[ODD R&B] Perhaps the biggest beneficiary of Odd Future’s recent dissolution is Syd “tha Kyd” Bennett. With the Internet, her leftof-center R&B project with producer Matt Martians, Bennett has made three breathy, jazzy, sexually and emotionally frank records that have struggled to be heard over the raging id-rap of Tyler the Creator and Earl Sweatshirt. But with the collective is broken up, the project is finally allowed to stand on its own. Ego Death, the group’s most recent album, is a subtle and evocative listen belonging in the same sphere of L.A. new-soul as Miguel and Thundercat. MATTHEW SINGER. Analog Cafe, 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. 8 pm. Sold out.

All ages.

Kristin Hersh

[STRIPPED-DOWN ALT-ROCK] The multifaceted singer-songwriter best known as the frontwoman for alternative era idols Throwing Muses makes her second trip to Portland this year, this time in support of Don’t Suck, Don’t Die: Giving Up Vic Chesnutt, her ode to the late, titular fellow songwriter. Mission Theater, 1624 NW Glisan St. 9 pm. $20 advance, $25 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Little May, Doe Paoro, Snowblind Traveler

[HEAVEN-SENT POP] The continent of Australia is turning out quality music with about the frequency asinine quotes escape from Donald Trump’s mouth. Sydney’s Little May is no exception. Its promising debut record, For the Company, was produced by the National’s Aaron Dessner in upstate New York. The trio offers sweeping, harmonious folk rock that drifts among the clouds—which the glimmering and graceful pop bands like First Aid Kit have hinted at. Never sleepy, ever pulsing, Little May is a godsend in the realm of acoustic pop, a genre that can sometimes act as a powerful sedative. MARK STOCK. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 9 pm. $12 advance, $14 day of show. 21+.

Wand, Personal Best, Grandparents

[PSYCH ROCK] Wand embodies the new-psych sound, embracing a mix of every genre ever built by on a foundation of LSD. Borrowing from stoner rock and shoegaze, with a bit of S.F. Sorrow-era Pretty Things and Ty Segall-esque modern rock thrown in, Wand delivers a potpourri of sounds appealing to the urbane young doper.

Despite its list of obvious influences, the band is not a throwaway rip-off, either. It has actual hooks, with honest-to-God catchy choruses, and its constant stylistic shifts don’t grate on the ears. BRACE BELDEN. The Know, 2026 NE Alberta St. 8 pm. $8.

21+.

SATURDAY, OCT. 31 King Dude, Drab Majesty, Big Haunt, Tetrad Veil

[SOUTHERN GOTHIC] Metal and folk make stranger bedfellows. So when TJ Cowgill switched from fronting death-metal outfit Book of Black to writing rootsy dirges as King Dude, it initially puzzled a lot of people. But Cowgill manages to show that metal and Americana really aren’t all that different. With his epic baritone and haunting lyrics recalling Nick Cave, King Dude’s albums contain enough melodramatic and morbid mysticism to rival any group of Scandinavian satanists.

With the Rocky Horror Picture Show of shoegaze, Drab Majesty, opening up, this show is objectively the best way to spend your Halloween. SHANNON GORMLEY. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 8 pm. $12. 21+.

PREVIEW COURTESY OF RIOT ACT MEDIA

FRIDAY, OCT. 30

DATES HERE

Natalie Prass, Promised Land Sound [BREAKOUT BUMMER JAMS] Natalie Prass is one of the hottest names in indie pop. Critics lauded the 29-year-old singer-songwriter’s self-titled debut for its structural perfectionism and Prass’ breathy soprano. After self-releasing two EPs while in college, Prass began her career as the touring keyboardist in Jenny Lewis’ band. When she decided to record her first full-length, she reached out to childhood friend and Richmond, Va., scene leader Matthew E. White to record and co-produce. White’s Spacebomb Records proved crucial to the album’s diverse instrumentation—from the harp and strings adorning “Christy” to the brass accompaniment on breakout track “My Baby Don’t Understand Me”—which all came courtesy of the label’s network at Virginia Commonwealth University’s jazz program. On the album, Prass spans from sensitive folk to sultry R&B, and her live performances, which can swell to boisterous full-band arrangements or shrink to just Prass alone, only intensify the dynamics. HILARY SAUNDERS. SEE IT: Natalie Prass plays Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., with Promised Land Sound, on Thursday, Oct. 29. 9 pm. $14 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.

SUNDAY, NOV. 1 Shannon and the Clams, Shopping, Woolen Men, Gazebos

[NEW-WOP] Shannon and the Clams’ latest LP, Gone by the Dawn, is a tale of two breakups. Like the majority of the Oakland group’s previous releases, it’s a retro-inspired sucker punch of emotion, effortlessly drawing upon ’50s doo-wop and rolling surf rock while examining the respective heartache of Shannon Shaw and guitarist Cody Blanchard, who both had relationships end while writing the album.

The swath of influences gives them room to breathe, though, rendering their bubbly sound more authentic than campy from the moment the plucky staccato and sliding bass kick in. The downside? The songs are so short you’ll likely miss two or three before you even manage to get back from the bar. BRANDON WIDDER. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave. 8 pm. $12. 21+.

MONDAY, NOV. 2 L7, Summer Cannibals

[CLASSIC GRUNGE] “Uncle Bob” is probably still a slob all these years later, even if L7’s 1988 self-titled debut isn’t as recognizable as other records from the era. That L7 never reached the audience its peers did might be explained by the quartet’s dogged adherence to scuzzy simplicity. And while newly penned compositions apparently have dotted L7 setlists since the troupe got back together earlier this year following a 14-year hiatus, it’d be an easy guess that those new songs are as rough-hewn as the older crop. DAVE CANTOR. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St. 8 pm. $24.50 advance, $29.50 day of show. All ages.

Vetiver, Loch Lomond

[MUTANT FOLK] Since 2011, Andy Cabic’s band Vetiver has established itself as one of the front-runners of the indie world. Its sound is deeply cerebral without being esoteric, anchored to the folk-rock traditionalism of ’60s California and Cabic’s intimate, confessional vocal approach. Vetiver’s newest record, Complete Strangers, sounds like a smooth adaptation of Wilco, folky and bristly while also being jammy and infectious. MARK STOCK. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 9 pm. Through Nov. 3. $12 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.

Ryn Weaver, ASTR, HolyChild

[OVER THE TOP] Ryn Weaver straddles two musical worlds: She’s got the powerful voice and confessional lyrics of a ‘90s singersongwriter, while dabbling into au courant retro synth-pop.

Unfortunately, she’s mediocre at both. But that didn’t stem the tide of YouTube hits spurred by celebrity endorsements of her 2014 single, “OctaHate”. Weaver’s debut, The Fool, was released a couple months ago, and it’s packed tight with pseudo-artsy kitsch landing her somewhere between Florence and the Machine and Lana Del Rey. Still, Weaver can do some seriously cool shit with her voice, and she pushes it to the very limit in acoustic renditions of her songs. So she at least deserves some props for that. SHANNON GORMLEY. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 8 pm. $22.50 advance, $26 day of show. All ages.

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MUSIC

DATES HERE PROFILE COURTESY OF BIG HASSLE MEDIA

TUESDAY, NOV. 3 Patty Griffin, Darlingside

[AMERICANA] Patty Griffin’s aborted first album was marred by overproduction, so her actual debut, 1996’s Living With Ghosts, comprised spare, acoustic demos.

Her next album, 1998’s Flaming Red, stirred in loud, alt-rock guitars, popping Griffin out of the folkie pigeonhole. Her work since has ranged between those poles, though centered on folk rock, while her gospel side trip, 2010’s Downtown Church, earned her a Grammy. Still fighting expectations, for the photo in her new Servant of Love, Griffin surprisingly dons a beaded, feathered headdress straight out of a Busby Berkeley ensemble. Musically, the album finds her confident in her audience, eschewing showy melodies, never straining to be “catchy.” The overall mood is unhurried, introverted and contemplative, with arresting, adventurous production touches. JEFF ROSENBERG. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St. 8 pm. $35. All ages.

CLASSICAL, JAZZ & WORLD Antonio Sanchez Migration

[DRUM KING] The Mexican jazz drummer behind the frenetic longform drum solos in last year’s Oscar-winning Birdman, Antonio Sanchez has the sort of creative freedom that only comes with a light-handed mastery of his craft. A longtime backing musician for famed jazz guitarist Pat Metheny, whom he has helped win three Grammys, Sanchez can shock audiences with the technical mastery of his instrument, while not sounding the slightest bit preprogrammed. In Portland with a quartet that includes sax, piano, bass and vocals, Sanchez will play originals off his latest record, Three Times Three, a swirling modernjazz concept album, with more than enough passionate grit to keep it off hotel lobby speakers. PARKER HALL. Jimmy Mak’s, 221 NW 10th Ave. 7 and 9:30 pm Friday, Oct. 30. $18-$25. Under 21 permitted until 9:30 pm.

The Nightmare Before Christmas

[COSTUMES AND STRINGS] Longtime Tim Burton fans are aware that the title is misleading, but that doesn’t make The Nightmare Before Christmas any less of a Halloween thing. The Oregon Symphony will perform Danny Elfman’s original score to the stop-motion classic on All Hallows’ Eve, while the film screens in the background. The latest in a series of film and video game related concerts designed to keep young faces in the crowd, this is one of the rare times costumes—outside of a suit and tie—are actually encouraged at the Schnitz. PARKER HALL. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 7:30 pm Friday, Oct. 30. $30. All ages.

FearNoMusic’s Halloween Extravaganza

[FEARLESS HALLOWEEN] If you think classical music costuming is all black tuxes and gowns, new music ensemble FearNoMusic will show you the more flamboyant side of contemporary classical.

In this all-ages concert, costumes are encouraged for the audience but required of the performers.

Composer Robert Erickson’s 1969 General Speech re-imagines Gen. Douglas MacArthur’s infamous 1962 farewell speech and asks Pink Martini trombonist Robert Taylor to dress in military regalia. One of America’s finest current composers, Michael Daugherty, is also one of its most fun-loving, and his music teems with pop-culture tropes from Superman to UFOs. For his 1996 Sinatra Shag, FNM violinist

CONT. on page 45

PHOTO: CAPTION TKTKTK

Shakey Graves SATURDAY, OCT. 31 As a massive fan of Star Trek: The Next Generation, Alejandro Rose- Garcia has some requests for the crowd attending his upcoming Halloween show at the Schnitz.

“If someone pulls the deep-cut shit out, oh man!” says the ebullient 28-year-old singer-guitarist (and former Friday Night Lights actor) from Austin, who performs rollicking, foot-stomping blues under the name Shakey Graves. “I’d love to see a Borg. That would really impress me. I’d be blown away by someone being a Borg.”

You probably wouldn’t peg Rose-Garcia as a Trekkie purely based on his music. Shakey Graves moves between Americana and noisy rock in songs that range from acoustic duets with Esmé Patterson (“Dearly Departed”) to snarky ramblings (“Word of Mouth”). Between multiple independently released recordings, as well as last year’s Dualtone Records debut, And the War Came, Shakey Graves has established himself as a proficient studio musician and a fierce performer. What began as a carnivalesque one-man band, with Rose-Garcia playing rootsy guitar riffs and adding percussion via a suitcase drum, has evolved drastically over the past few years.

“It’s a lot louder than it was last time,” says Rose-Garcia, who now performs with a full-band lineup, “which probably pleases some people and also probably dejects a couple. But that’s how it goes.”

Though Saturday’s show will be Shakey Graves’ first with a Starfleet Academy theme—which, truth be told, is a bit of an odd pairing given his rootsy, decidedly non-sci-fi sound—this is Rose-Garcia’s second appearance in town in six months. His standout performances at Pickathon in 2013 established a local following, but Rose-Garcia has had a close relationship with the city for years. He’s actually been visiting family friends here since he was a little kid. And when he began his career as a musician, with only a few videos online, “Portland was a place where people would actually show up,” he says.

So maybe that explains why we’re getting this special Shakey Graves show. In keeping with the Star Trek theme, he also hints that some sound effects and related stage banter may be in order.

But mostly, Shakey Graves is plotting a mayhem-filled evening of Americana, blues, noise and all-around rock ’n’ roll. And if Portland audience members are dressed up for the show, it’ll be even better—though Rose-Garcia is still figuring out his own costume.

“Essentially, we’re not going as characters from the show.

We’re just Starfleet versions of ourselves,” he says. “So like, if I was a Starfleet officer, I’d have to figure out what rank I’m at. I guess I wouldn’t be that far in yet. I’d probably be Ensign Rose-Garcia.

“I’ve always thought that Halloween is a great excuse to wear an outfit that you want to wear every day,” he continues. “It’s basically just a big vessel for me to wear the outfit. That’s all I want.”

HILARY SAUNDERS. Beam me up, Shakey.

SEE IT: Shakey Graves plays Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, with Tennis, on Saturday, Oct. 31. 8 pm. $30. All ages.

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MUSIC Inés Voglar Belgique dons Nancy Sinatra’s 1966 garb, presumably including boots made for walkin’.

And George Crumb’s 20th-century masterpiece, Voice of the Whale, puts the performers in masks and special lighting that complement its haunting atmosphere. BRETT CAMPBELL. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 1:30 pm Saturday, Oct. 31. $10 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.

Akiyama/Eubanks/ Kahn/Nakamura

All Hallows’ Eve Dance of Death with Resonance Ensemble

OneBeat

[GLOBAL COLLABORATION] While the Trumpheads try to build walls, the 4-year-old OneBeat program, organized by NYC’s Bang on a Can new music collective, brings young musicians from around the world to collaborate on original music, play it on tour, lead workshops with local audiences and “develop strategies for artsbased social engagement” when they return to their home countries. This year’s lineup includes Cuban experimental electronic musician and producer Jorge Peña, aka GreenCh; Colombian circus performer and cumbia accordionist Katherine Suavita Niño, aka La Real Esa; Malaysian composer, sound designer and environmentalist Ng Chor Guan; Balkan singer Dragana Tomić, one of Serbia’s first professional female kaval players; and Senegalese kora virtuoso Vieux Cissokho. BRETT CAMPBELL. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave. 8 pm Sunday, Nov. 1. $10 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.

For more Music listings, visit

Grandparents

SINCERELY, BAGMAN (STRANGE LIGHT) [KALEIDOSCOPIC POP] Of all the psych-pop bands in Portland—and there a lot of them these days—Grandparents are the most likely to have recorded inside a carnival funhouse. Unlike many of its peers, which start with kooky effects and worry about songs later, Sincerely, Bagman, the sextet’s first true full-length after a series of EPs, is grounded in classic ’60s pop melodies and garage-rock guitars, except it’s all been stretched out, distorted and pulled apart like cotton candy. Opener “YYOOUU” begins as a misremembered cover of Pink Floyd’s “Us and Them” before the pills kick in and the whole thing gets tossed into a bouncy castle. “Kids in the Alley” plinks and plops like “Two Weeks” meets “Sugar, Sugar,” if the confection in question were procured from a sketchy teenager behind a convenience store.

Of course, there are traces of modern psychedelic auteurs in the group’s buoyant swirl, including Tame Impala (“Wisdom Teeth”) and Ariel Pink’s haunted boogie (“Beach Jelly”). But Grandparents seem to be having more fun than any of them, and the fluorescent rush is as addicting as taking a bump of Pixy Stix powder straight to the head. MATTHEW SINGER. SEE IT: Grandparents play the Know, 2026 NE Alberta St., with Wand and Personal Best, on Friday, Oct. 30. 8 pm. $8. 21+.

The Golden draGon PRIVATE VIP ROOMS OVER 30 DANCERS DAILY FOOD CARTS OPEN LATE NIGHT ALWAYS HIRING ENTERTAINERS

18 AND over After HourS pArty tiLL 6Am 324 SW 3rd Avenue • LocAted doWntoWn 503-274-1900 • goLdendrAgonpdx.com

GOLDENDRAGONCLUB

[DEATH DANCES] Long before Robert Johnson sang about the crossroads, super-musicians were alleged to have made deals with the devil, including 19th-century piano virtuoso and composer Franz Liszt, whose “Totentanz” (“Dance of Death”) is diabolically difficult to play and thrilling to hear. Pink Martini’s Thomas Lauderdale and fellow pianist Hunter Noack will duel with Liszt’s devilish score before Resonance Ensemble, which comprises some of the city’s top choristers, engages in another “Totentanz,” this one written by early-20thcentury German composer Hugo Distler, which mingles medieval and jazz influences along with Stravinskian modernism. The 14 short movements, sung here in English, constitute dialogues between the figure of Death and the people of a village he invites to dance with him. It’s a deeply moving reflection on mortality, punctuated by violin solos played by Third Angle’s Ron Blessinger. BRETT CAMPBELL. Trinity Episcopal Cathedral, 147 NW 19th Ave. 916-801-2155. 7:30 pm Saturday, Oct. 31. $5-$22.

ALBUM REVIEWS

@GOLDENDRAGONPDX

[JAZZ NOISE] An international group of free improvisational heavyweights comes together, by way of Portland’s Creative Music Guild, for an evening of unplanned multicultural sound play. Guitarist Tetuzi Akiyama, electronic musician Toshimaru Nakamura, soprano saxophonist Bryan Eubanks and drummer Jason Kahn create a smokescreen of sound that forms many shapes of human emotion.

Sometimes the quartet feels overwhelmingly restless and dissonant, other times soft, clear-headed and full of overt musical intention. But wherever the noise travels tonight, it’s sure to be a place worth visiting. PARKER HALL. Disjecta, 8371 N Interstate Ave., 7:30 pm Saturday, Oct. 31. $12-$20.

DATES HERE

Jenny Conlee with Steve Drizos FRENCH KAYAKING MUSIC (JEALOUS BUTCHER)

[WHITEWATER INSTRUMENTALS] Jenny Conlee is the queen of embellishments. She’s served as an integral part of the Decemberists and the l e s s e r- k n ow n B l a c k Prairie since the inception of both, dressing the sound of each band with light touches of accordion, melodica and a mélange of baroque details rooted in a different century. Her first solo venture, French Kayaking Music, places that ornamentation at the forefront. It was written for a recent film about a French trio that kayaked the Colorado River in the late 1930s, and appropriately, this fine collection of meandering instrumentals showcases a concise unity that flows from one song to the next. Somber bouts of piano and accordion, laid down with the help of Conlee’s husband, Steve Drizos, anchor much of the brief album, but they don’t define it. Whereas “Rapids” features intertwining lines of dancing piano, “Back in France” and “Lake Powell” build on dapples of electric guitar. Meanwhile, “Melon Stand,” with its brushed percussion and nimble shuffle, could easily double as the soundtrack to a French bazaar—if only in your head. The images the compositions conjure up are all romantic and inspired, regardless if you’re watching the accompanying film or simply driving toward the coast. BRANDON WIDDER. SEE IT: Jenny Conlee and Steve Drizos play Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., with Blue Cranes, on Sunday, Nov. 1. 8 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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MUSIC CALENDAR WED. OCT. 28 Alberta Street Pub 1036 NE Alberta St Mero

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash The Sensory Level

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave S (Jenn Ghetto)

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St Mac Demarco, Alex Calder

Dante’s

350 West Burnside Tav Falco’s Panther Burns, Mike Watt, Toby Dammit

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St Emily Wells, Lorna Dune

Duffs Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Arthur Moore

Edgefield

2126 S. W. Halsey ST. Sloan Martin

Goodfoot Pub & Lounge

2845 SE Stark St Chicago Afrobeat Project

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St Mr Twin Sister

Justa Pasta

1336 NW 19th Ave Anson Wright Duo

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St Eyez Front Booking Presents

Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Psychopomp curated by Ogo Eion

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave Sean Nicholas Savage

Panic Room

3100 NE Sandy Blvd THONIS / THE GHOST NEXT DOOR (CA) / VON DOOM / SPECIAL GUEST

Roseland Theater

8 NW 6th Ave Riff Raff, MiMosa, I$$A

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave RED FANG with Wild Throne and The Bugs

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St YONATAN GAT (of Monotonix - Israel/NYC)

The White Eagle

836 N Russell St Heavy Gone Acoustic

Wonder Ballroom 128 NE Russell St Heartless Bastards, Slothrust

THURS. OCT. 29 Aladdin Theater

Dilly Dally

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St Natalie Prass, Promised Land Sounds

Duffs Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Motorcoat, Tough Love Pyle

Goodfoot Pub & Lounge 2845 SE Stark St NEW KINGSTON

Hawthorne Theatre 1507 SE 39th Hanson

LaurelThirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St Lewi Longmire & the Left Coast Roasters

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd 3rd Annual BRAZILIAN HALLOWEEN BALL

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash Woodwinds

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave

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Panic Room

3100 NE Sandy Blvd VENOM / SLAYER / CELTIC FROST / ST VITUS/PENTAGRAM / METALLICA- TRIBUTE!!!

Roseland Theater

8 NW 6th Ave All Time Low / Sleeping With Sirens

2026 NE Alberta St Wand, Personal Best, Grandparents

3100 NE Sandy Blvd Blowfly, The Gods Themselves, Nekro Drunkz, Headless Pez , Mr. Plow / Saucy Yoda

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St COVER BANDS NITE

The Secret Society 116 NE Russell St Thursday Swing!

Featuring The Djangophiles

The White Eagle 836 N Russell St Lexington Field

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St The Sword, Kadavar

FRI. OCT. 30 Alberta Street Pub 1036 NE Alberta St Hill Dogs

Analog Cafe & Theater

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd The Internet

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway The Nightmare Before Christmas

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash Strictly Platonic

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave The Builders and The Butchers, Hillstomp

Clyde’s Prime Rib Restaurant & Bar

5474 NE Sandy Blvd Cool Breeze

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St 80s Video Dance Attack Halloween Party

Dante’s

830 E Burnside St John Grant

Analog Cafe & Theater

3939 N Mississippi Ave Little May, Doe Paoro, Snowblind Traveler

Panic Room

Alberta Rose Theatre

1036 NE Alberta St The Fourth Wall

Mississippi Studios

Starday Tavern

350 West Burnside HELL’S BELLES with Andalusia Rose

Alberta Street Pub

1624 NW Glisan St Kristin Hersh

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave Windhand, Danava, Monolord

Doug Fir Lounge

Duffs Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Soul Commanders

Edgefield

2126 S. W. Halsey ST. The Resolectrics

Hawthorne Theatre 1507 SE 39th Hanson

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave Antonio Sanchez Migration

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

LAST WEEK LIVE

McMenamins Mission Theater

Star Theater

3552 N Mississippi Ave Red Yarn kids show

[OCT. 28-NOV. 3]

421 SE Grand Ave BOYFUNK

Mississippi Pizza Pub

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave Warren Miller’s Chasing Shadows at Aladdin Theater 3000 NE Alberta St The Nitemare B4 Xmas Halloween Matinée

Lovecraft Bar

For more listings, check out wweek.com.

E M I LY J O A N G R E E N E

= WW Pick.

Highly recommended.

Editor: Matthew Singer. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submit events. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: music@wweek.com.

13 NW 6th Ave SANCTUARY 6517 SE Foster Rd Smash Bandits

The Know

Village Baptist Church 330 SW Murray Blvd.

Beaverton Symphony Orchestra

Wonder Ballroom 128 NE Russell St Turkuaz

SAT. OCT. 31 Alberta Street Pub 1036 NE Alberta St Space Shark

Analog Cafe & Theater 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd Velaraas, The Diggers, Southgate, Increate, & Asterion

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway Shakey Graves, Tennis

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash Velaraas

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Ash Creek

Buffalo Gap Saloon

6835 SW Macadam Ave JT Wise Band

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave The Builders and The Butchers, Hillstomp

DISJECTA

8371 N Interstate Akiyama/Eubanks/Kahn/ Nakamura

Dante’s

350 West Burnside Smoochknob

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St The Real McKenzies

Duffs Garage

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Halloween Party with the Fondells, Wanna-Be 52s

Edgefield

2126 S. W. Halsey ST. Kris Deelane’s Sun Celebrations

Goodfoot Pub & Lounge

2845 SE Stark St MCTUFF with INHALEN HALLOWEEN

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE 39th New Years Day , Get Scared , Eyes Set To Kill , The Relapse Symphony , Darksiderz , Divides

High Water Mark Lounge 6800 NE MLK Ave

DUNGEN MASTERS: Halfway through Dungen’s sold-out show at Bunk Bar on Oct. 21, a friend leaned over and asked me about the comparisons between the Swedish psychedelic pastoralists and Australian psychedelic retroactivists Tame Impala. It’s something that’s come up a lot recently—as much as anyone ever has a conversation about competing international psych acts, at least—since the former released Allas Sak, its first album of what historians will certainly remember as the “Tame Impala Era.” The question essentially comes down to, “Why are they performing in a tiny sandwich shop cum rock club while the other is headlining festivals?” Watching the band play through its lightly majestic set, the answer was obvious. Dungen doesn’t pave expressways to the skull or loins, but to someplace far too subtle to register with whole fields full of people, even though the music itself is evocative of fields, groves, valleys and dew-dappled hillsides.

While the group is certainly capable of ripping open cans of searing riffage—particularly with prog genius Reine Fiske still on guitar—the focus this night was on leader Gustav Ejstes’ piano, and the feeling was more European jazz jam than mind-altering trip beyond all consciousness. Still, coming from musicians of their caliber, it was a captivating thing to behold. And when they finally did turn the energy up, on the serpentine groover “Mina Damer Och Fasaner” and the tumbling “Panda,” it was clear that, when it comes to sheer instrumental grandeur, there are very few bands on any level that can touch them. MATTHEW SINGER. Halloween Tribute Band Party!!!

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St Green Luck Media Group Presents: Macabre Party

Kennedy School Theater

5736 N.E. 33rd Ave. Freak Mountain Ramblers

Mississippi Pizza Pub 3552 N Mississippi Ave Professor Gall

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave fEARnoMUSIC’s Halloween Extravaganza; King Dude, Drab Majesty, Big Haunt, Tetrad Veil

Ponderosa Lounge

10350 N. Vancouver Way 98.7 The Bull Halloween Bash with LoCash and Special Guest Country Wide!

Revolution Hall

1300 SE Stark St #110 Fruition, The Lil’ Smokies

Star Theater 13 NW 6th Ave Shafty

The Firkin Tavern 1937 SE 11th Ave Undone (Weezer Tribute) + The Hand That Bleeds + Coloring Electric Like

Laurelthirst Public House

2958 NE Glisan St. Life During Wartime: Talking Heads tribute

The Secret Society 116 NE Russell St

The Midnight Serenaders 6th Annual Swingin’ Halloween Bash with Jacob Miller and the Bridge City Crooners

Turn Turn Turn

8 NE Killingsworth St Phantom of the Popera!

Halloween Specatacular: Witch Pop Choir

Twilight Cafe and Bar 1420 SE Powell The Misfats/Bridgetown Homicides(Murder City Devils Tribute)/Stay Tuned

Vie De Boheme

530 SE 7th Ave. FUNKY HALLOWEEN BASH with ANDY STOKES BAND

World Famous Kenton Club 2025N Killpatrick Volume Bomb Records Under The Covers With Satan record release

SUN. NOV. 1 Alberta Rose Theatre 3000 NE Alberta St The Steel Wheels

Analog Cafe & Theater

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd The Algorithm, Angel Vivaldi, Save Us From The Archon

Ash Street Saloon 225 SW Ash Fluid Spill

Clyde’s Prime Rib Restaurant & Bar

5474 NE Sandy Blvd Ron Steen Jazz Jam

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St

Jenny Conlee and Steve Drizos

Edgefield

2126 S. W. Halsey ST. Michele Van Kleef

Hawthorne Theatre 1507 SE 39th Parkway Drive Live in Portland

Landmark Saloon

4847 SE Division St Ian Miller and Friends!

McMenamins Al’s Den 303 SW 12th Ave Jacob Westfall

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave OneBeat

Rontoms

600 E Burnside St Wooden Indian Burial Ground + Is/Is + The Tamed West

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave Shannon and the Clams, Shopping, Woolen Men, Gazebos

The Hollywood Theatre 4122 NE Sandy Blvd The Winding Stream & Dom Flemons

Wonder Ballroom 128 NE Russell St of Montreal

MON. NOV. 2 Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St L7

Dante’s

350 West Burnside Karaoke From Hell

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St EL VY

Edgefield

2126 S. W. Halsey ST. Groovy Wall Paper with Kathryn Claire

Goodfoot Pub & Lounge 2845 SE Stark St Sonic Forum

Landmark Saloon

4847 SE Division St Mike Coykendall

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave Vetiver, Loch Lomond

The White Eagle 836 N Russell St Lessons In Fresh

Wonder Ballroom 128 NE Russell St Ryn Weaver, ASTR, HolyChild

TUES. NOV. 3 Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave Noah Gundersen

Analog Cafe & Theater 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd Have Mercy

Bossanova Ballroom 722 E Burnside St Portland Blues & Jazz Dance Society

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside St Patty Griffin, Darlingside

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St EL VY

Edgefield

2126 S. W. Halsey ST. Pilar French Trio

Goodfoot Pub & Lounge 2845 SE Stark St YAK ATTACK

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE 39th Ghost Town , Dangerkids , Palaye Royale , Bad Seed Rising , Sounds Like Harmony

Landmark Saloon

4847 SE Division St Honky Tonk Union

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St Jackstraw

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave Vetiver

Panic Room

3100 NE Sandy Blvd DIE ROBOT / LA FIN ABSOLUTE DU MONDE

The Old Church

1422 SW 11th Ave Little Ears Presents Johnny & Jason

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St THE SLOTHS

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont yOya (LA) + Hart & Hare + Swansea

The White Eagle

836 N Russell St •The Hollerbodies • Daniel Robinson & Joe Suskind•

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St MARIANAS TRENCH

MUSIC K AY L A S P R I N T

BAR REVIEW

Where to drink this week.

1. Zoiglhaus

5716 SE 92nd Ave., 971-339-2374, zoiglhaus.com.

Hello, Lents! Brewer Alan Taylor brought his excellent German-inflected Pints beers over to a big ol’ family-friendly brewpub styled for the motherland, and the Lents Lager is a light, clean take on the Bavarian Helles.

2. La Moule

2500 SE Clinton St., 971-339-2822, lamoulepdx.com.

The balanced gin-Aperol Sunday Morning ($9) is like a Negroni made with cherries, and there’s a fine $8 Old Fashioned made with Heaven Hill 6-year bourbon. St. Jack’s crossriver companion bar is a fine place to drink and eat mussels beneath a portrait of black-eyed Serge Gainsbourg, while Television plays in a bar without a television.

3. Victoria Bar

4835 N Albina Ave., victoriapdx.com.

Victoria Bar’s owners have merged the aesthetic of their freeway-offramp nightclubs (Jackknife, Dig a Pony) and vegan whiskey patio bars (Bye and Bye, Sweet Hereafter) into a plausible template for citywide, upper-middlebrow dominion.

4. Quality Bar

931 SW Oak St., sizzlepie.com.

Now you can get your late-night westside pizza by sitting down directly at a bar, ordering a peachinfused Old Fashioned or ’Gansett tallboy, and then ordering your slice from the daily menu. You will wait for it with drink in hand, rather than standing in line. It is a miracle of science.

5. Old Town Brewing

5201 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 200-5988, otbrewing.com.

There’s a good chance you know Old Town better for its pizza. Best get reacquainted with its beer.

The Shanghai’d IPA just got named the best damn English-style IPA in the country at the Great American Beer Festival.

THE GIRL WHO HAS EVERYTHING: One Halloween when I was living in San Francisco, I spent a lot of money on an impulsive day-of plane ticket back to Portland for one night. When my friends picked me up at the airport, we drove straight to Chopsticks II on East Burnside. Chopsticks—a grimy karaoke bar that was technically a Chinese restaurant, with cheap beer and a crowd made up of regulars, just-out-of-college kids and the possibly homeless—was a fixture of my 20s, even though I spent much of my 20s living abroad, in California. Whenever I was in town, it was the place we would gather in amorphous groups, getting wasted on PBR—or, if someone else was buying, well drinks.

Maybe you saw us: spilling alcohol and plates of rice on the stained carpet, smoking cigarettes, picking up dudes and taking turns screaming along to pop songs like we would never get old. On Sept. 19, Chopsticks II closed its doors for good. But old friends in Portland don’t disappear, they just move farther from the river, and so David Chow opened a new Chopsticks (3390 NE Sandy Blvd., 234-6171) a week later. It’s cleaner, there’s no carpet, and since it used to be a strip club, there are roomy side areas. A spotless patio looks out over Sandy.

The drinks are still cheap—a well whiskey ginger was $4.50—and the food is still basic mall Chinese. For $6.50, you get enough sweet, crunchy mandarin chicken and white rice to soak up the booze. When I went with my friends the other night, we sat in a comfy booth and sprang for mixed drinks. It was a more toned-down affair than that night 10 years ago. One friend reached into her purse and found diapers. Another drank only soda water. I sang “Part of Your World” from The Little Mermaid. We left at a reasonable hour, all driving home safely and alone. Portland has changed since I was a kid. Now there are plenty of kitschy dives and ironic hipster hangouts. But, while the new Chopsticks won’t win awards for best drinks or food, it’s the real deal, the kind of bar that made Portland a wonderland for underemployed youths with wet shoes and warm hats. Give it some time to get dirty and put new pictures on the walls, and soon enough a fresh group of broke kids will be there, making terrible decisions and singing songs too loudly and way out of key. LIZZY ACKER. Goodfoot Pub & Lounge 2845 SE Stark St SOUL STEW with DJ AQUAMAN AND FRIENDS

Hawthorne Theatre 1507 SE 39th Jai Ho: The Ultimate Bollywood and Bhangra Dance Party

Holocene

Holocene

The Evergreen 706 SE 6th Ave. No Vacancy presents a Halloween Costume Party featuring Eli & Fur

Lovecraft Bar

1001 SE Morrison St Dr. Adam

WED. OCT. 28 Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave HOLLA N OATES

Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Psychopomp curated by Ogo Eion

THURS. OCT. 29 Fifth Avenue Lounge

125 NW 5th Avenue JUICE! drum and bass presents Bladerunner (UK), Furney (UK), Dave Owen and Revival

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St Jaron the Fame

Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Shadowplay

The Liquor Store 3341 SE Belmont STATIC

FRI. OCT. 30 Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave JPREZ

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont Sappho and Dillon’s TURNT UP

SAT. OCT. 31

Receive discounts at your favorite restaurants.

$10 Off at Palmetto Cafe!

1001 SE Morrison St DJs Kiffo & Rymes 421 SE Grand Ave DJ Buckmaster presents Sad

The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont Modern Ritual. NOV. 1

MON. NOV. 2 Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave DJ Cory Boyd

Analog Cafe & Theater

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd Bollywood Horror XIII with DJ Anjali and The Incredible Kid

EATING OUT? LOW ON CASH? WE GOT YOU.

TUES. NOV. 3 Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Bones - DJ Aurora

Find this deal at wweek.com/dubdubdeals.com Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

47

MUSIC K AY L A S P R I N T

BAR REVIEW

Where to drink this week.

1. Zoiglhaus

5716 SE 92nd Ave., 971-339-2374, zoiglhaus.com.

Hello, Lents! Brewer Alan Taylor brought his excellent German-inflected Pints beers over to a big ol’ family-friendly brewpub styled for the motherland, and the Lents Lager is a light, clean take on the Bavarian Helles.

2. La Moule

2500 SE Clinton St., 971-339-2822, lamoulepdx.com.

The balanced gin-Aperol Sunday Morning ($9) is like a Negroni made with cherries, and there’s a fine $8 Old Fashioned made with Heaven Hill 6-year bourbon. St. Jack’s crossriver companion bar is a fine place to drink and eat mussels beneath a portrait of black-eyed Serge Gainsbourg, while Television plays in a bar without a television.

3. Victoria Bar

4835 N Albina Ave., victoriapdx.com.

Victoria Bar’s owners have merged the aesthetic of their freeway-offramp nightclubs (Jackknife, Dig a Pony) and vegan whiskey patio bars (Bye and Bye, Sweet Hereafter) into a plausible template for citywide, upper-middlebrow dominion.

4. Quality Bar

931 SW Oak St., sizzlepie.com.

Now you can get your late-night westside pizza by sitting down directly at a bar, ordering a peachinfused Old Fashioned or ’Gansett tallboy, and then ordering your slice from the daily menu. You will wait for it with drink in hand, rather than standing in line. It is a miracle of science.

5. Old Town Brewing

5201 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 200-5988, otbrewing.com.

There’s a good chance you know Old Town better for its pizza. Best get reacquainted with its beer.

The Shanghai’d IPA just got named the best damn English-style IPA in the country at the Great American Beer Festival.

THE GIRL WHO HAS EVERYTHING: One Halloween when I was living in San Francisco, I spent a lot of money on an impulsive day-of plane ticket back to Portland for one night. When my friends picked me up at the airport, we drove straight to Chopsticks II on East Burnside. Chopsticks—a grimy karaoke bar that was technically a Chinese restaurant, with cheap beer and a crowd made up of regulars, just-out-of-college kids and the possibly homeless—was a fixture of my 20s, even though I spent much of my 20s living abroad, in California. Whenever I was in town, it was the place we would gather in amorphous groups, getting wasted on PBR—or, if someone else was buying, well drinks.

Maybe you saw us: spilling alcohol and plates of rice on the stained carpet, smoking cigarettes, picking up dudes and taking turns screaming along to pop songs like we would never get old. On Sept. 19, Chopsticks II closed its doors for good. But old friends in Portland don’t disappear, they just move farther from the river, and so David Chow opened a new Chopsticks (3390 NE Sandy Blvd., 234-6171) a week later. It’s cleaner, there’s no carpet, and since it used to be a strip club, there are roomy side areas. A spotless patio looks out over Sandy.

The drinks are still cheap—a well whiskey ginger was $4.50—and the food is still basic mall Chinese. For $6.50, you get enough sweet, crunchy mandarin chicken and white rice to soak up the booze. When I went with my friends the other night, we sat in a comfy booth and sprang for mixed drinks. It was a more toned-down affair than that night 10 years ago. One friend reached into her purse and found diapers. Another drank only soda water. I sang “Part of Your World” from The Little Mermaid. We left at a reasonable hour, all driving home safely and alone. Portland has changed since I was a kid. Now there are plenty of kitschy dives and ironic hipster hangouts. But, while the new Chopsticks won’t win awards for best drinks or food, it’s the real deal, the kind of bar that made Portland a wonderland for underemployed youths with wet shoes and warm hats. Give it some time to get dirty and put new pictures on the walls, and soon enough a fresh group of broke kids will be there, making terrible decisions and singing songs too loudly and way out of key. LIZZY ACKER.

SOUL STEW with DJ AQUAMAN AND FRIENDS

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St Dr. Adam

WED. OCT. 28 Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave HOLLA N OATES

Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Psychopomp curated by Ogo Eion

THURS. OCT. 29 Fifth Avenue Lounge

125 NW 5th Avenue JUICE! drum and bass presents Bladerunner (UK), Furney (UK), Dave Owen and Revival

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St Jaron the Fame

Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Shadowplay

The Evergreen 706 SE 6th Ave. No Vacancy presents a Halloween Costume Party featuring Eli & Fur The Liquor Store

3341 SE Belmont STATIC

FRI. OCT. 30 Dig A Pony

736 SE Grand Ave JPREZ

Goodfoot Pub & Lounge 2845 SE Stark St

Jai Ho: The Ultimate Bollywood and Bhangra Dance Party

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St DJs Kiffo & Rymes

Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave DJ Buckmaster presents Sad

The Liquor Store 3341 SE Belmont

3341 SE Belmont Sappho and Dillon’s TURNT UP

Modern Ritual.

SAT. OCT. 31

Lovecraft Bar

The Liquor Store Analog Cafe & Theater

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd Bollywood Horror XIII with DJ Anjali and The Incredible Kid Hawthorne Theatre 1507 SE 39th

eating out?

Low on cash? we got you.

NOV. 1

MON. NOV. 2 421 SE Grand Ave DJ Cory Boyd

TUES. NOV. 3 Lovecraft Bar

421 SE Grand Ave Bones - DJ Aurora

Receive $10 Off Palmetto Cafe!

Find more deals at wweek.com/dubdubdeals.com Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

47

Headout P.31

48

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

PERFORMANCE Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead.

Editor: ENID SPITZ. Theater: ENID SPITZ (espitz@wweek.com). Comedy: MIKE ACKER (macker@wweek.com). Dance: ENID SPITZ (dance@wweek.com).

TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: espitz@wweek.com.

OPENINGS & PREVIEWS Ain’t Misbehavin’

Raunchy, swinging piano battles and hedonistic Cotton Club acts inspired by the life of jazz piano legend Fats Waller make this Tony Award-winning musical a nostalgic trip from the Harlem Renaissance through to World War II. Portland Center Stage got permission to amp up the play from what it was on Broadway and in the West End, augmenting the cast with Third Rail, Artists Repertory and Portland Playhouse veterans, plus a few London, New Orleans and New York talents like Andre Ward— who did Rock of Ages on Broadway— and David Jennings—who starred in the Broadway version with American Idol’s Ruben Studdard. That’s a lot of namedropping, even for PCS. But it’s worth a mention that this may be the largest black cast we’ll see on any stage this year. Though early critics decried the show’s lack of dialogue, in a play that once starred the Pointer Sisters crooning songs like “’Tain’t Nobody’s Bizness” and “How Ya Baby” that’s probably an insubstantial fault. Gerding Theater at the Armory, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700.

7:30 Tuesday-Friday, noon Thursday, 2 pm and 7:30 pm Saturday-Sunday, Oct. 30-Nov. 29. $30-$75. 12+.

Broomstick

Gemma Whelan (the founder of our favorite local underground Irish theater, not the Game of Thrones star) directs the always-stunning Vana O’Brien in Artist Repertory’s Halloween offering. New York Times columnist John Biguenet’s onewoman thriller follows an Appalachian witch through her very long life of lost loves. The heartbroken witch eventually turns bitch and exacts her longawaited revenge on everyone who’s wronged her. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 241-1278. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Sunday, 11 am Wednesday, Nov. 11, and 2 pm Sunday. Through Nov. 22. $48.

Macbeth, A Dark Retelling

“Trigger warning for domestic abuse” warns the top of the playbill for this modern reinterpretation of Shakespeare’s shortest play. Lady Macbeth steals the spotlight in the feminist-tinged production, where she’s played as the unfortunate victim of domestic violence and the patriarchal society that supports it.

Turning to violence out of desperation, she inspires her husband (Macbeth with a gas mask and a police baton) to commit treason and eventually causes a national bloodbath. This is the first production from Polymath Art Theatre, the newlyformed fringe project of local thespians Kate Belden and Katie Nichols. Largely a labor of love that’s still trying to find it’s footings, this is the type of undertaking that involves Nutella for blood. Lightbox Kulturhaus, 2027 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 750-3811. 8 pm ThursdaySaturday and 2 pm Saturday, Oct. 31Nov. 14. $15-$20.

NEW REVIEWS The Drunken City

Three young, suburbanite girlfriends all got engaged. Cue mayhem. By the time the first woman has her bachelorette party—a debauched affair in an unnamed city that looks a lot like Vegas—everything is falling apart. Chief amongst the foibles? Bride-to-be Marnie (Holly Wigmore) isn’t so sure that she wants to get married after all. She manifests her reservations by making out with Frank (Murri Lazaroff-Babin), a banker from their suburb that she runs into while out on the town. As the bacchanal progresses, the city takes on an evil sentience, serving in the script like a character itself. But it’s not a believable source of chaos. This is 2015; young suburbanites are moving into inner cities that outpace the ‘burbs in affluence and amenities. Even Cleveland

has a gourmet grilled cheese spot with craft brews on tap. Even in this show of minimal frills (someone holds up a card that says “three weeks later” to show the passage of time), the setting seems unrealistically stripped. As for the humans, playing drunk requires a deceptive subtlety. Overdo it and you end up with a college skit put on by RAs during orientation week. Fortunately, the cast has this subtlety, elucidating the troubles at the bottom of a couple glasses of vino—or in this case, tequila shots—with humor.

JAMES HELMSWORTH. Shoebox Theater, 2110 SE 10th Ave., 306-0870. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, 2 pm Sunday.

Through Nov. 21. $10-$20.

in a “mandatory service” job, struggling to find instruments for his band, living under his Castro-loving mom’s roof.There are rays of sunshine amongst this gloom—it is the Caribbean, after all—a hot doctor love interest, a rigged radio that catches Miami stations and even some musical success. Of course, this all comes crashing down in a way you might be able to see coming from the lobby, but it’s about the music, man, and the music is made by some of the best in the world—and the dancing’s pretty incredible, too. JAMES HELMSWORTH. Winningstad Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4355, artistsrep. org. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Sunday, 2 pm Sunday and noon Wednesday, Oct. 21.

Through Nov. 15. $35-$56.

Equus

Manic and stunning, Equus fulfills our Fall Arts Guide prediction that theater would get grim. Inspired by the true

English case of 17-year-old Alan Strang (Phillip Berns) blinding six horses with a metal spike, Peter Shaffer’s notorious play imagines the boy’s therapy with children’s psychiatrist Martin Dysart (Todd Van Voris) and unpacks his crime in a series of nightmarish flashbacks. Post5 power couple and Ty and Cassandra Boice co-direct, and here their penchant for showmanship is at its best. They set a stark stage—just a black box and a swivel chair—and populate it with twisted personalities. The show’s only soundtrack is a haunting hum that sounds like a yogic refrigerator saying “om.” It crescendos and then disappears, leaving an eerie silence for dramatic affect. But Post5’s cast doesn’t need the help. Seven of the 10 actors are newcomers, which could’ve made tackling this hefty play a hot mess.

But Van Voris’s (The Librarians, Grimm) Doctor Dysart is perfect. Conflicted but resolute, he shakes and spits with visceral passion during his monologues.

Berns, the one original company member on stage, is painfully well-cast. Gaunt and pink-eyed, he glares silently and then explodes in manic episodes of ecstasy or rage that stay unpredictable for the entire, long show. And it is a long two plus hours to spend on a psychological roller coaster in this renovated Sellwood church. But for a true Halloween haunting, skip the new Guillermo del Toro flick or Fright Town—one look from Berns will fill your quota. ENID SPITZ. Post5 Theatre, 1666 SE Lambert St., 971-258-8584. 7:30 pm ThursdaysSundays. Through Nov. 14. $15-20.

The Foreigner

Dirty secrets and evil plots surface at a rural fishing lodge in Georgia thanks to a newcomer named Charlie and his debilitating fear of social situations. Regular guest “Froggy” LaSeur, a Brit who lends

CONT. on page 50

PREVIEW OWEN CAREY

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

ALSO PLAYING 42nd Street

“I Only Have Eyes For You” shouldered it’s way into America’s consciousness thanks to this starry-eyed 2001 Tony Award winner. When our young Peggy Sawyer comes to New York City, she’s a fresh-faced and vapid transplant from the tiny Allentown, and her raison d’être is landing a good role in Pretty Lady on Broadway. Luckily for little Peggy, the lead gets maimed and she’s given the role. With a long lineage of remakes— Busby Berkeley’s 1933 movie, Bradford Ropes’ original novel, a rewrite by Michael Swear and finally the Best Musical revival choreographed by Randy Skinner—it really seems there’s no stopping Peggy.

ENID SPITZ. Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St., 800-273-1530. 7:30 TuesdayFriday, 2 pm and 7:30 pm Saturday, 1 pm and 6:30 pm Sunday. Through Nov. 1. $25-$80.

Carrie the Musical

Carrie White still gets her bath in this remake of the classic Halloween fodder that notoriously flopped on Broadway in 1988. The multi-million dollar flop lasted just five performances during its original Broadway run, but now it’s became such a legendary emblem of theatrical folly that a new generation felt obliged to raise the overly-maligned project from the grave. The original was penned

by Lawrence Cohen (screenwriter for the famous film) and scored by Michael Gore & Dean Pitchford (the platinum Fame and Footloose songwriting team).

This Stumptown Stages production follows a triumphant Los Angeles revival earlier this year that won fans over with a streamlined script, inventive staging and soft rock balladry that creepily fuels the story of a bullied teen girl’s telekinetic revenge. JAY HORTON. Antoinette Hatfield Hall, 1111 SW Broadway, 381-8686.

7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, 2 pm Sunday. Through Nov. 8. $25-$40.

Cock

To launch its 16th season of groundbreaking dramatic works, Defunkt Theatre and veteran director Jon Kretzu present the Portland premiere of Mark Bartlett’s acclaimed relationship portrait Cock.

Winner of the 2010 Olivier Award following its initial run at London’s Royal Court, the searing examination of conflicted sexuality breathes fresh life to the age-old romantic triangle through the story of a gay man unexpectedly fallen into heterosexual love yet unwilling to leave his boyfriend. JAY HORTON. Defunkt Theatre, 4319 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 481-2960. 7:30 pm Thursday-Sunday. T, through Nov. 15. $10-$25.

Cuba Libre

Real musicians don’t get movies made about them without writing really good music: Ray Charles, Johnny Cash, the replacement singer in Judas Priest— two of three ain’t bad. The same is evidently true of fictional musicians and musicals. Cuba Libre, tells the story of Alonso, the fictional leader of the very real band Tiempo Libre, who serve as the pit orchestra for the show. Through a series of flashbacks, we see his development as a young musician in Cuba, stuck

sHut your eyes: Pete company members experiment with darkness.

A BottomlessWell PETE’S SOUND EXPERIMENT KEEPS PATRONS IN THE DARK. Imagine the sounds inside a stranded Arctic ship, right before the crew resorts to cannibalism.

It’s no surprise that a theatrical group with “experimental” in its name and a former EDM DJ in the director’s chair would create a “sightless” show built on that exact premise. But no one knows exactly where it’ll go from there, including the director.

Jacob Coleman admits that All Well might be an overly optimistic title for Portland Experimental Theater Ensemble’s newest undertaking.

“In this exact form, this hasn’t been done before. And it can go wrong in so many ways,” says Coleman. Touring 25 patrons at a time through the basement of an old Masonic lodge, tucking them into hammocks in complete darkness and whispering stories in their ears about an 1845 Arctic expedition—that’s his plan. “Worst-case scenario: Someone falls out of a hammock in the darkness.”

All Well promises to be the most intriguing production this year, at least for the brave souls who sign up for sounds like a haunted field trip for art-school kids.

It started out as sound. Not any particular sound, just Coleman’s broad conceit of a sound-based play.

“In the dark, all of the other senses are heightened.”

So when Coleman found the story of the Franklin expedition—in which British sailors lived stranded in ice near Canada until cannibalism and cold killed them—it seemed like an ideal plot.

“What does it mean to take a journey into the unknown? There’s something fundamentally human about that instinct to explore,” Coleman says, “so we are using that query as a frame for the show.”

“Soundplay” is the best way to describe his collaboration with sound designer Mark Valadez. The two traded sonic inspirations and recorded things close-up—like a finger on rope or the rustling of pipe tobacco—in a series of sound experiments.

“I’ve always enjoyed the avant-garde side of music,” says Coleman. “like when sounds that are distant and enveloping contrast with ones that are close and staccato.”

Using headphones and 16 speakers of varying sizes, Coleman and Valadez devised a unique approach to every director’s mission: Infiltrate the audience. “It sounds like someone is right next to you, or inside your head even,” says Coleman.

“That’s usually impossible to get in a theater.”

Testing what’s possible on guinea pigs from PETE’s Institute for Contemporary Performance, Coleman was still making changes to the show two weeks before opening. What used to be a museumscale exhibit in the Imago Theatre lobby is pared down to a brief summary of Franklin’s escapades. In some cases, the less you know, the better, he says.

But there is a solid plot amid the ever-changing theatricality, insists Coleman. “It does have a narrative arc,” he says. “It’s twilight into darkness, despair into dawn—the trajectory of a dark night of the soul.”

But he’s keeping the rest of All Well’s precarious details shrouded. “We want to keep the mystery,” he says. “People will be pulled away gradually from the lobby, one by one or two by two…into the darkness.”

ENID SPITZ. see it: All Well is at Imago Theatre, 17 SE 8th Ave., petensemble.org. 10 and 10:30 pm WednesdayThursday; 10, 10:30 and 11 pm Friday-Saturday; 8:30, 9, 9:30 and 10 pm Sunday. Through Nov. 1. $25.

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

49

PERFORMANCE

Junie B. Jones The Musical

Ticket to Read gives kids from lowincome schools free trips to the theater and a book to take home.

Everyone gets the joy of first grade reincarnated as a musical. As if the plight of Barbara Park’s precocious heroine wasn’t already enough—she needs glasses and the lunch lady is her only friend—Oregon Children’s Theatre and Music Theatre International add song and dance. Newark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway. 2 and 5 pm Saturday, 2 pm Sunday, 11 am shows on Sunday Nov. 1 and 22. Through Nov. 22. $18-$32.

long for these polar personalities to wind up doing the nasty in Sex With Strangers, playwright Laura Eason’s ode to romance in the age of Wi-Fi. Olivia and Ethan meet at a secluded writers’ retreat in Michigan during a blizzard that’s knocked out the cottage’s Internet signal. Cut off from the digital realm, they get to know one another quickly. As it turns out, she’s an unsuccessful novelist and he’s the author of a bestselling memoir about his prolific sexual exploits. Danielle Slavick deftly captures Olivia’s insecurity and smouldering erotic potential.

Padding around in pajama pants and frumpy sweaters, she’s an adorable

geek. Christopher M. Smith plays up Ethan’s vanity and bravado—and he’s a hot piece to look at in skimpy underwear and a tank top. The dialogue delivers plenty of laughs, but Portland Center Stage stays pretty PG. For an au courant love story that’s about having sex with strangers, Sex With Strangers is retrograde in its sensibility. Gender stereotypes abound. Olivia is uptight, commitment-seeking and worried about aging; Ethan is a crass stud-muffin who just wants to get laid.

In the end, monogamy prevails. Still,

CONT. on page 51

REVIEW OWEN CAREY

his demolition expertise at a local army base, introduces his shy friend to the lodge denizens as a foreigner who speaks no English. Suddenly, the Georgians are spilling their darkest thoughts in front of Charlie, and a madcap satire ensues. When in doubt, Hillsboro: redneck jokes. No show Oct. 31. HART Theatre, 185 SE Washington St., Hillsboro, 693-7815. 7:30 pm Friday-Saturday and 2 pm Sunday.

Through Nov. 8. $15.

La Muerta Baila

An original baile folklórico production, this global premiere is the first act of what looks to be a stellar 32nd Teatro Milagro season, honoring Día de los Muertos with a bilingual fable about a spirit’s refusal to visit the land of the living. Written and directed by celebrated Brooklyn dramatist Rebecca Martinez, La Muerta Bailais a a fanciful travelogue with sly wit and traditionalist passion. JAY HORTON. Milagro Theater, 525 SE Stark St., 236-7253.

7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday and 2 pm Sunday. Through Nov. 8. $25.

Remme’s Run

Remme’s Run opened to rave reviews during last winter’s Fertile Ground festival, and local audiences have anxiously anticipated the world premiere of this ambitious multimedia presentation. Crafted from historical accounts of the Oregon Territory by writerdirector (and two-time Oregon Book Award nominee) Wayne Harrel, it recounts the tale of a cattleman’s desperate ride north from Sacramento to save his fortune and start a family on Sauvie Island. Animated backdrops, photographic projections and an immersive milieu of era-appropriate background artists situated about the theater bring the second-grade history tale to life. JAY HORTON. CoHo Theater, 2257 NW Raleigh St., 220-2646. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, 2 pm Sunday. Through Nov. 7. $28.

Rope

Wyndham Brandon is bored (and more than a little unhinged) when he convinces his friend to help him commit a murder. They strangle their fellow undergraduate and stash his body in a chest. But all that happens before the curtain even rises. Then they host a dinner party and serve a meal to the father of the boy they killed off the box containing his son’s body. If that sounds twisted, it is, and delightfully so. What follows is a parade of characters so exaggerated that drama becomes farce.

Brandon (Trevor Jackson) is giddy, longing to brag about his genius.

But Michael Tuefel as the cynical poet Rupert Cadell steals the spotlight. Channeling a cross between John Waters and Stewie Griffin, Tuefel’s every action is enrapturing— from a sidelong suspicious stare to a spittle-flecked, red-faced rant. Guest director Rusty Tennant challenges us to regard death, or murder specifically, as a matter of perspective. Are we rooting for the murderers to be punished or to get away with it? The biggest surprise might be your own reaction to the ending. PENELOPE BASS. Bag and Baggage, 253 E Main St., Hillsboro, 345-9590. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, 2 pm Sunday.

Through Nov. 1. $25-$30.

Sex With Strangers

It’s hard to imagine two characters more different than Olivia and Ethan.

She’s a neurotic intellectual who’s always cleaning; he talks with his mouth full and pees with the bathroom door open. But it doesn’t take

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

KEEPING IT UP: (From left) Darius Pierce, Kerry Ryan, Michael O’Connell and Dana Green.

Jonesin’ for It These aren’t the Joneses to keep up with. They don’t have perfect bodies, jobs, marriages or kids, and they don’t drive BMWs. These are The Realistic Joneses, and in Will Eno’s affecting one-act play, two couples who both happen to be named Jones get to know one another in unexpectedly poignant ways.

John (Michael O’Connell) and Pony (Dana Green) move in next door to Bob (Darius Pierce) and Jennifer (Kerry Ryan) in the suburbs of a quiet mountain town. The couples are poised at that murky estuary where late middle age begins to bleed into senior-citizen territory.

Bob has a degenerative disease, John’s having trouble remembering things, and their marriages are suffering. As the couples socialize, Bob and Pony become attracted to one another, as do John and Jennifer.

Mercifully, this doesn’t degenerate into some tawdry tableau of geriatric swinging. The mutual attractions aren’t so much based on bumping and grinding (although some of that occurs) as they are on the happy attention that comes from being seen by a new set of eyes.

Despite the specters of decline and death that haunt Eno’s script, his mordant dialogue earns well-deserved laughs. “I’m always attracted to only half a person,” Pony tells Bob in a stinging, backhanded compliment, “which is probably why I’m attracted to you.”

In a moment of emotional epiphany, Jennifer confesses to Bob, “You hurt my feelings every day.” Without missing a beat, he replies: “That’s what feelings are for.”

It would be easy for four people lined up on lawn chairs in a suburban backyard to come across as well-worn middle-class archetypes, but that never happens. The quartet of actors navigate this bittersweet prose effortlessly, seeming natural as they inhabit the characters’ idiosyncrasies. Eno and the actors show deep compassion for these couples, and it’s contagious.

As the action winds down after a bevy of revelations, jealousies and health crises—the foursome sits together beneath a starspeckled sky. “Things probably aren’t going to turn out so well for us, are they?” Jennifer asks no one in particular.

We know the answer—for them and for all of us. But the crystalline night still seems like a little miracle, and so do the pleasures of wine, good company and the tiny, jewel-box moments that we snatch from the jaws of doom. RICHARD SPEER. The grass is more mature on Third Rail’s side of the fence.

SEE IT: The Realistic Joneses is at Third Rail Repertory Theatre, 17 SE 8th Ave., 235-1101. 7:30 pm Wednesday-Saturday and 2 pm Sunday. Through Nov. 14. $42.50.

GARy NORMAN

Murmurs P.6

THE DRUNKEN CITY with its sharp dialogue and nuanced performances, the play is satisfying in the way that whipped cream is: a light treat before bedtime—the perfect nightcap and maybe even better than sex. RICHARD SPEER. Portland Center Stage, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm TuesdaySunday, noon Thursday, 2 pm Saturday-Sunday. Through Nov. 22. $25-50.

Tommy J and Sally

Race relations headline the Firehouse stage again, following the traditionally diverse venue’s multi-month hiatus from staging theater. In Mark Medoff’s (Children of a Lesser God) political drama Tommy J and Sally, Tom is a black intruder who holds Sally, a white, Jewish celebrity hostage in her home. Rather than violence, the play centers around witty banter and taut debates as Tom talks Sally’s ear off about the state of race relations in America.

Put on by local African American theater company PassinArt, with the intent of inspiring community discussion, this show from director Andrea White will have two talk-back nights following the shows on Oct 17 and 18. Not recommended for children.

Interstate Firehouse Cultural Center, 5340 North Interstate Ave. 7:30 pm Friday-Saturday, pm Sunday.

Through Nov. 8. $25.

COMEDY & VARIETY Heart-Shaped Box

Brodie Kelly’s all-new downtown comedy showcase is back for another Monday night engagement. This month’s installment of the sexy, creepy and always silly comedy showcase features locals Bri Pruett and Jeremy Eli, Owen Straw all the way from Brooklyn, Seattle’s Mitch Mitchell and some special guests. Chill out to some excellent comedy in Ankeny Alley, and stick around for karaoke after the show. Valentines, 232 SW Ankeny St., 248-1600.

9 pm Monday, Nov. 2. $5. 21+.

Lez Stand Up Quarterly Showcase

Kirsten Kuppenbender and the hilarious ladies of Lez Stand Up are putting on their final quarterly showcase of the year. Featuring the entire Lez Stand Up troupe, Caitlin Weierhauser will be in charge of hosting, and special guests Bri Pruett, Jeffrey Robert and Dinah

Foley will be in charge of making everybody laugh. Curious Comedy Theater, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr Blvd., 477-9477. 7:30 pm Thursday, Oct. 29. $8-$10.

Rex Navarrette

Known as the number-one Filipino American comedian, Rex Navarette might just be the best comic you’ve never heard of. He’s performed on Lopez Tonight, appeared alongside heavy-hitters like D.L. Hughley and Paul Mooney among many others, and sold out shows in Manila, Hong Kong and Singapore. Now Navarette is bringing his unique standup show to Portland for a one-night special engagement. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 8 pm Wednesday, Oct. 28. $15-$23. 21+.

Rob Little

Named “The Happiest Comic in America,” Rob Little has appeared on Last Comic Standing and was listed

by Maxim magazine as a “Real Man of Comedy.” Now one of comedy’s fastest rising stars is bringing his act to Portland for three shows, including two on Halloween night. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave, 888643-8669. 8 pm Thursday. Oct. 29, 7:30 pm & 10 pm Friday-Saturday, Oct. 30-31. $15-$30. 21+.

DANCE Shaping Sound

What would sound look like if it had limbs? That’s the idea behind this contemporary, touring dance spectacle that’s been riding the West Coast on the star-power of a company stocked with reality TV credits. Travis Wall, a 2015 Emmy award winner for outstanding choreography and runner-up on season two of So You Think You Can Dance, directs the crew of Dancing with the Stars and All the Right Moves veterans. If names like Nick Lazzarini, Teddy Forance and Kyle Robinson are familiar, or a show of bombshells and scantily-clad Adam Levine lookalikes sounds like a great Wednesday night, the Schnitz is your place.

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 7:30 pm Wednesday, Oct. 28. $29-$65.

For more Performance listings, visit Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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VISUAL ARTS

By ENID SPITZ. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: espitz@wweek.com.

40th Anniversary Exhibition

To honor its 40 years in Portland, Blue Sky is displaying over 300 prints from its lengthy roster of past artists. Like a real life Pinterest, the prints line every wall almost all the way from floor to ceiling. The images— things like an African camel kneeling, a rusty car covered in ivy or a woman laying on a bed stark naked with smoke rising from her groin—pop out at you, each one completely different from the next.

From tulips growing out of sprockets to the dog a on pile of wonder bread (number 135), every subject imaginable gets wall space. In the center of the room the curators built a model of the original Blue Sky space—it was tiny.

ANDREA TOMOE. Through Oct. 31. Blue Sky Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 225-0210.

A Burning Man Pas de Deux

Photographs of the fleeting instant before the Burning Man collapses into itself, or a blur of a figure dashing away from the flames or intimate portraits of the many exotic performers who breathe life and energy into the iconic festival are on display in this off-the-beaten-path gallery in Pioneer Place Mall. Of the two West Coast photographers who collaborated for this photo-based history, Stewart Harvey— considered the unofficial Burning Man documentarian—strives above all to capture a moment of movement that is most revealing about a person, place or situation. Marti is inspired by the transitory nature of the occasion, which exists only for a brief slice of time before being disassembled without a trace, so her photos often seize a still moment between two states. She calls it the gray area “between hope and fear.” These are two vastly different takes on Burning Man, but the raw beauty and power of both make this show a complementary spectacle. HILARY TSAI. Through Nov. 15. Mark Woolley Gallery, 700 SW 5th Ave., Suite 4110, 998-4152.

Alessandro Casson: Glass Sculpture From Venice

Alessandra Casson is the real deal renaissance man. A master of design with a political science degree, Casson comes from Venice (Italy, not California) and his sculptures combine centuries-old techniques with a burst of modern flare. His glass urns and bullhorns are vibrant and understated, albeit completely lacking function. ANDREA TOMOE. Through Oct. 31. Butters Gallery, 157 NE Grand Ave., 248-9378..

Class Aves

For the past 15 years, Christopher Shotola-Hardt has been painting birds on canvas—a heron under the St. Johns Bridge on a tall and think panel, tiny oil paintings of finches, a wide swath of blue canvas covered in ravens. But Class Aves goes beyond flat surfaces, including things like a Plexiglas bird feeder filled

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with beads and nailed to the wall, an antique wooden birdhouse on a pedestal in the center of the room and a scroll of poetry that trails from the wall across the floor and ends in a pile of rocks. In response to the paintings, Merridawn Duckler wrote six poems inspired by Shotola-Hardt’s avian works, which are printed on paper with burnt edges and hung in between the canvases that inspired them. Through Oct. 31. Blackfish Gallery, 420 NW 9th Ave., 224-2634.

Closing the Gap

Chris Trueman investigates the history of abstract painting with acrylic and spray paints. His compositions are teeming with hard and soft edges side-by-side, expanses of color and dynamic contrast that creates visual depth. A lot of contemporary abstraction doesn’t rise above the moniker “zombie formalism” but this L.A. artist promises more. MEGAN HARNED. Through Oct. 31. Soltesz Fine Art, 1825 NW 23 Ave., 971-276-9097.

Dark Matter

Anticipating the shorter days and longer nights of winter, Jeffrey Thomas solicited a diverse body of works exploring the theme of darkness from artists who work in a variety of media. This dark and foreboding exhibition champions a world assembled out of shadows and contrasts and promises art that’s either about the bleak, black and sinister or somehow uses darkness as a medium itself.

Through Nov. 7. Jeffrey Thomas Fine Art, 2219 NW Raleigh St., 544-3449.

Earth Works

If you want to see lots of clouds and rolling hillsides, the type of Kinfolkworthy scenes that make your Instagram feed feel sadly mediocre, Earth Works

by Sue-Del McCulloch is like going on an Oregon road trip without ever getting in your car. The larger than life landscapes are wild, exaggerated and dramatic, and they’re painted in bright primary hues that almost look smudged.

Accompanying her smooth paintings, the 3-D sculptures by Stuart Jacobson look stark—dramatic black and white stone carved into curves that give a very different view of Earth. ANDREA TOMOE. Through Nov. 1. Waterstone Gallery, 124 NW 9th Ave., 226-6196.

Elisabeth Horan

Guest curator Elizabeth Spavento presents Elisabeth Horan’s latest work, which reflects on and purges the artists’ past five years in Portland through a collection of categorized materials. Over the course of five days the artist will draw from this bric-a-brac and apply objects directly to the wall into a collage to span the wallspace of the gallery. MEGAN HARNED. Through Oct. 30. Duplex Gallery, 219 NW Couch St., 206-5089.

In the City

Screenprints on glass tiles of every-

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

day objects like dumpsters, mopeds and storefront mannequins by Portland artist Stacey Lynn Smith, Nathan Sandberg’s glass and concrete tiles that are dot printed to mimic the unnoticed textures of asphalt and Scottish artist Karlyn Sutherland’s kiln-formed glass rectangles combine at Bullseye Project’s In the City collective show.

Using urban landscapes as inspiration, the show ranges from Sandberg’s “Paver 6”—a small square of concrete lined with cracks—to Smith’s screenprints reminiscent of fliers and ads that collage street corners, including things like a canary yellow food truck.

Juxtaposed with the detail in Sandberg and Smith’s work, Sutherland’s clean, 17-inch tall glass rectangles on the wall are a minimalist tribute to the skylines of her home country. KYLA FOSTER. Through Dec. 23. Bullseye Gallery, 300 NW 13th Ave., 227-0222.

Jason Hirata

Passing through the meat-locker-style plastic curtain that is Muscle Beach’s front door, you find a white box garage decorated with handwritten paper signs.

They say things like “Hummus” and “BP-100” and continue on in a long list of foods and food additives. Grouped together mysteriously, the signs make you feel like they’re some sort of puzzle to be decoded. Just as indecipherable, a solitary figurine from The Big Bang Theory is plopped in the middle of the “gallery.” Departing from the multichannel video work that he exhibited last year, artist Jason Hirata’s newest Portland show is more down-to-Earth—it feels like a Lower East Side gift shop/deli hybrid. ANDRE FILIPEK. Through Nov. 2.

Muscle Beach, 31 SE 51st Ave., musclebeachusa.com.

Jessica Jackson Hutchins: Confessions

Confessions is as intimate as it sounds, a two-gallery show by internationallyknown, Portland-based artist Jessica Jackson Hutchins that tries to explain the very nature of art itself. What is collecting, what is curating, and what might be just hoarding? Once something is labelled as “art,” a whole new roster of questions arise—how should art be cared for and preserved? In an attempt to tackle these big questions and confess some of the faults of artists as a whole, Hutchins displays a series of interpretive objects—like a chair painted with multi-colored brushstrokes. Through Nov. 8. The Lumber Room, 419 NW 9th Ave., and Cooley Gallery, 3203 SE Woodstock Blvd., 777-7251.

Urban Expressions

At 20 years old, Mark Bailey sold out his first show in Portland. Twelve years later, he’s still nailing impressionism in this city. His gritty paintings are a slice of everyday life—the diners, walkways and bars that occupy his canvases give the observer a unique look at urban reality.

Although his skill is most definitely on point, his work could use a little shot of Portland “weird.” ANDREA TOMOE. Through Oct. 31. Gallery 903, 903 NW Davis St., 248-0903.

For more Visual Arts listings, visit

REVIEW C O U R T E S Y O F TA B I T H A N I KO L A I

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

fomo faSHIon: an Intangibles design by Tabitha nikolai.

Future Art “This is a document for coping with the death of before,” begins Dynamic Horizons Ltd. Advanced New Hire Manual, local artist Tabitha Nikolai’s fictional field guide for life after the inevitable cultural apocalypse.

Nikolai’s newest installation in her Dynamic Horizons series is billed as a pop-up show of wearable technology. The exhibitioncum-boutique walks a fine line between absurdity and sincerity.

And that’s fitting for a show mocking the Urban Outfitters model— take painfully trendy styles and mass produce them for a culture obsessed with being relevant.

Wandering into Composition Gallery looks eerily familiar to shopping in the West End or Alberta Arts District: Loose air plants and too many Edison bulbs. Nikolai’s pieces—dystopian plastic sculptures that look like alien relics—sit on reclaimed wood tables, or perch on twee antique chests.

She’s created a warm, earthy envelope of space inspired by one of Portland’s primary cultural exports—the DIY homemaker aesthetic.

But there is an air of something more insidious here.

Stark against their background, Nikolai’s sculptures are amalgamations of wearable tech gear, sea creatures and human body parts, which she rendered with 3-D modeling software, and created them using white nylon and plastics. The Apple watch attached to a Nintendo Power Glove is nothing revolutionary, but Nikolai added underwater coral and a tiny human head. Another standout piece looks like an Oculus Rift that was unearthed from an e-waste dump filled with seaweed. It’s a study in comparison, sitting by a 35mm camera and this scrawl on the gallery wall: “Meat, meet meta.”

Among vintage film slides, raw wood pallets and a bootleg Pendleton blanket, Nikolai’s works look like prototypes for an absurd future that merges two opposing aesthetics. The unifying factor, according to Nikolai, is consumers’ desire. Whether it’s a locally sourced, handcrafted, unique and sustainable pine table or a Macbook Pro made in Shenzhen—rest assured, the $4,000 price tag includes the cost of self-satisfaction. ANDRE FILIPEK. Intangibles is social commentary, not wearable tech.

SEE IT: Dynamic Horizons Ltd.: Intangibles Product Launch is at Composition Gallery, 625 NW Everett St., 408-375-2159, compositioncomposition.com. Through Oct. 31.

BOOKS = WW Pick. Highly recommended.

By JAMES HELMSWORTH. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: words@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, OCT. 28 America’s Bank: The Epic Struggle to Create the Federal Reserve

The Federal Reserve has gone from being a part of the government that only true nerds think about to one of Uncle Sam’s most politically contentious bits. In America’s Bank, Wall Street Journal reporter Roger Lowenstein explores how the bank came to be in 1913 after decades of financial panic. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

Toni Sala

In The Boys, two young men die in a car crash in rural Spain. The survivors left to grapple with the loss include a teenage girl to whom the lads offered a ride, a banker who understands the deaths as part of his midlife crisis and a local tough who finds himself strangely affected by the event. Powell’s Books on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

Welcome to Night Vale

Welcome to Night Vale is a podcast that’s some bizarre fusion of The X-Files and A Prairie Home Companion, a Lake Wobegon full of aliens and voids. This year, hosts Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor are venturing into print form with a book. Check out our interview with the authors on wweek. com. Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., 228-4651. 7 pm. Free.

THURSDAY, OCT. 29 Loggernaut: Ghosts

The theme of this edition of the decade-old Loggernaut will be— appropriately enough for the season—ghosts. It will feature A.M. O’Malley, IPRC director and a prolific poet; Benjamin Parzybok, author of the novels Couch and Sherwood Nation, and Margaret Malone, whose short-story collection People Like You is coming out next month. Ristretto Roasters, 3808 N Williams Ave., 2888667. 7:30 pm. Free.

FRIDAY, OCT. 30 Kristin Hersh

As the leader of the band Throwing Muses, Kristin Hersh was at the forefront of ’80s alt-rock—they were on 4AD, bro. But after reflecting on this time in 2010’s Rat Girl, in this year’s Don’t Suck, Don’t Die, she sets her pen on another musician: Vic Chesnutt, the Athens songwriter who released some 17 solo albums and several collaborations despite being quadriplegic. She’ll be interviewed by The Oregonian’s Peter Ames Carlin, who loves Bruce Springsteen even more than your dad. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 2284651, 7:30pm, Free.

SUNDAY, NOV. 1 Andrea Kleine with Vanessa Veselka

One morning in 1982, Leslie deVeau

shot her sleeping 10-year-old, Erin, in her bed. Author Andrea Kleine was her friend. Kleine draws from this childhood tragedy to write Calf, in which a girl named Tammy deals with a similar tragedy after a move to D.C. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

Tavi Gevinson

Tavi Gevinson first gained attention for her blog, Style Rookie, which garnered thousands of followers each day before she was even of bat mitzvah age. These days, she’s going to NYU and running Rookie magazine, a site for teenage girls that treats them like the sentient beings they actually are (looking at you, J-14). The best stuff from Rookie’s fourth year is now out in a volume.

Wanna feel like crap? Gevinson isn’t even 20. Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., 228-4651. 2 pm. Free.

Snowden

Your TV is watching you. No, seriously: The government can make it do that. That’s one of the underreported Edward Snowden revelations that Ted Rall (To Afghanistan and Back) tells in his graphic novel, Snowden, about the young government contractor’s life. A leading voice in cartooning for two decades, Rall is a political cartoonist—full of vibrant colors and surprisingly apelike people—and has appeared in the nation’s leading publications, like The New York Times and, more importantly, Mad. Powell’s Books on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 228 4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

MONDAY, NOV. 2 Raising Lilly Ledbetter

By extending the statute of limitations on gender discrimination, the Lilly Ledbetter Fair Pay Act makes the workplace safer and fairer for women. But that’s just a bunch of abstract legal crap—what does this look, and more importantly, feel like?

In Raising Lilly Ledbetter, female poets attempt to answer that question. Broadway Books, 1714 NE Broadway, 284-1726. 7 pm. Free.

TUESDAY, NOV. 3 Cheryl Strayed

Cheryl Strayed’s latest book, Brave Enough, is a collection of some of her wisest and most humorous quotes. The event’s sold out, but maybe reading scalpers are a thing in Portland. Broadway Books, 1714 NE Broadway, 284-1726. 7 pm. Sold out.

Jack Bishop of America’s Test Kitchen

Those of us who listen to NPR on Sunday evenings already know the pleasure of America’s Test Kitchen’s insightful and entertaining food coverage. In his new book, 100 Recipes, the TV show’s Jack Bishop offers 100 practical recipes for the everyday eater. Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., 228-4651. 7 pm. Free.

Jewish Voices 2015

Jewish Voices is an annual reading series featuring writers and poets who are—surprise!—Jewish. This year’s features David D. Levine, who won a Hugo award for his short story “Tk’Tk’Tk,” polymath poetmusician Alicia Jo Rabins and Willa Schneberg, who won an Oregon Book Award for her poetry collection, In the Margins of the World.

Oregon Jewish Museum & Center for Holocaust Education, 1953 NW Kearney St., 226-3600. 7:30 pm. $10.

For more Books listings, visit Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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FREE

Willamette Week’s 2015/2016

Restaurant Guide out now!

Find Portland’s best 99 restaurants, happy-hour steals, fresh Oregon coast oysters, wood-grilled rib-eye and so much more!

Copies may be found at Willamette Week’s office and select locations.

Call 503.243.2122 for additional information

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Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

MOVIES

OPENING THIS WEEK

Pelo Malo

Burnt

ing coming-of-age film, individuality stands little chance against the madding crowd of urban Venezuela. For Junior, a fatherless 9-year-old of mixed race, his identity is manifest in the natty curls atop his head. Junior spends many stolen hours trying to straighten his curls into a look more like the pop idols he watches on TV, which leaves his mother anguishing over his sexual orientation. Rondon’s ambivalent, almost documentarian style highlights the brutalist architecture of this Caracas slum to show how alienated her characters feel. Early on, Junior and a friend peer out at a thousand balconies, searching for glimpses of humanity in the views they get of their distant neighbors on their porches. Arguably, the film’s lone show of affection is a scene in which Junior reads “I love you” spray-painted on one such balcony. But the words prove entirely without context to the boy, showing just how distanced he is from his own emotions. But in the film, Rondon’s sensitive distance makes even the most lost characters relevant to any audience. NR. ERIC MILLMAN. Hollywood Theatre. 7 pm Thursday, Oct. 29.

Everyone is always in the kitchen, and you’d think one crowded with Bradley Cooper, Sienna Miller, Emma Thompson and Uma Thurman (Uma!) would be on fire. Cooper is bad-boy chef Adam Jones, who’s looking for another ego trip, aka Michelin star. We didn’t realize Cooper was already in that career dead zone where he takes roles about “the love between two people, and the power of second chances.” Poor Uma. Screened after deadline. R. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Fox Tower, Movies on TV, Tigard, Wilsonville.

Labyrinth of Lies

B You’ve probably already seen enough movies about the Holocaust. There’s been so much art made about this horrible period of world history that it’s hard to imagine a time when the word “Auschwitz” didn’t immediately conjure numerous terrifying images from silver screens. But Labyrinth of Lies focuses on just such a time: 1960s Germany, when former Nazis exercised their power over the German government to cover up details about the war. Alexander Fehling (Inglourious Basterds) is Johann Radmann, a plucky young prosecutor who uses his office to investigate—and eventually charge— 22 men in German criminal court for their actions during the war. This was a first in the country’s history. Filmmaker Giulio Ricciarelli’s debut features a gripping story, told through nostalgic shots of men in Mad Men-style suits debating heavy matters in lofty courtrooms, riding pastel Vespas through the countryside or pacing stories-tall archive rooms. The film’s only real flaw is being a bit too on-the-nose (Radmann carries a note from his dad telling him to “always do the right thing”). PG-13.

ALEX FALCONE. Cinema 21.

My Skinny Sister

A- The heartbreaking reality of living

with an eating disorder is unforgettably captured from the perspective of one victim’s younger sister in this Swedish family drama. The smallest member of a dysfunctional family, Stella (Rebecka Josephson), witnesses her idol and role model—figure-skating older sister Katja (Amy Diamond)—continue her painful struggle with body image. The small cast makes this narrative seem even more intimate as we watch Katja’s downward spiral and the strain it puts on the girls’ sisterly bond. When Katja rejects food to the point of being forcefed, watching through Stella’s eyes makes you fiercely aware of the narrator’s youth and naivete. Bring tissues aplenty, and be ready to cry into your popcorn—this movie will move you. NR. AMY WOLFE. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 2:30 pm Sunday, Nov. 1.

Once I Was a Beehive

D Mean Girls meets Mormonism in this

family-friendly movie about keeping the faith. Once I Was a Beehive follows angst-filled 16-year-old Lane (Paris Warner), who’s coping with the death of her father and that her mother has remarried a Mormon. Lane attends a Mormon sleep-away camp with her newly acquired cousin and aunt. With the help of overly ecstatic, drama-filled girls, the weeklong endeavor leads her to find support in her Mormon counterparts. The movie’s underlying message: The Mormons are not trying to convert you, they just want to educate. With spiritual bonding activities, like rolling into camp on Noah’s ark, and keeping-the-faith motivational messages, the movie is a religious diatribe of biblical proportions. For the right audience, it might be a spiritual awakening and endearing coming-of-age story, but most Portlanders’ awakening will consist of coming to and wiping away a spot of drool as the credits roll. NR. AMY WOLFE. Movies on TV.

B+ In Mariana Rondon’s heart-rend-

POWGirls Premiere Party

Seven films made by 14-to-19-year-old girls, the most recent graduates from POWGirls’ quarterly workshop, premiere at the Clinton. The celebration of young women in media promises endearing moments, and cookies. Clinton Street Theater. 1 pm Sunday, Nov. 1.

Room

B+ In this riveting adaptation of Emma Donoghue’s novel of the same name, an abducted woman must raise her son in a confined space, providing as normal an upbringing as possible, while captive.

To maintain a stimulating setting for her child, Ma (Brie Larson) keeps him busy by using both of their imaginations to create a social environment, arranging exercise and reading lessons throughout the day and even playtime with anthropomorphized characters named Bed and Lamp. Director Lenny Abrahamson (Frank) brings out the underlying dynamic of sanctuary versus prison with flying colors, aided by Jacob Tremblay’s sincere, wonderstruck performance as little Jack. Larson stretches her legs in easily her most complex role yet, portraying a woman dealing with immense trauma beneath the surface of her calm exterior. As their world expands beyond the confines of their room, Ma realizes it’s harder to maintain a nurturing grip on Jack’s environment, and her meticulously calibrated coping mechanisms grow more tired with every moment spent in freedom. R. LAUREN TERRY. Fox Tower.

Scouts Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse

Here’s hoping the titular disaster holds off until opening day. Not screened for critics. R. Oak Grove.

(T)error

A- “Don’t make no fucking independent film. They gonna come after me.” So begins the post-9/11 spy doc (T)error.

Profiling FBI informant “Shariff,” the film flits from scenes of him driving his New York City cab to hot dogs somersaulting on a gas-station warmer to Shariff baking a cake with his young son. The scenes are intimate, even heartwarming, as the duo nostalgically spread frosting together. Until suddenly Shariff is loading a Rottweiler into his truck, or pinning wanted faces on his pockmarked Pittsburgh map. Text narrating Shariff’s backstory or his text messages to and from the FBI are superimposed over scenes of him drinking Dunkin’ Donuts coffee while stalking a bearded target named Kalifah outside a Goodwill. The film is all oblique closeups—empty junk-food wrappers, street signs whizzing by, Shariff so zoomed in we can see his nose hairs—making you feel like a spy yourself. It’s a rare, intimate and unnerving look at how the War on Terror lives an everyday

American life as Shariff smokes a joint and bakes his dream of opening his own cupcake shop. “The best informants are the worst people,” says a voice in the film from The Leonard Lopate Show.

Good or evil, (T)error at least makes the characters of America’s homeland war on terror into real people. NR. ENID SPITZ. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Sunday, Nov. 1

The Last Witch Hunter

D- The Last Witch Hunter attempts a lot of twists and turns, and it all ends up rating lower than Vin Diesel’s voice.

Diesel grunts and groans as Kaulder, an immortal witch hunter fighting to save civilization. The bland characters and shallow storyline are heavily reliant on special effects—bugs crawling on the evil witch who is releasing a plague on humanity, and extravagant sparks of magic that light up the screen.

But sparks can’t blind us to the horrible acting between Kaulder and Chloe (Rose Leslie), the witch he befriends.

As in most cases, more Michael Caine would be a vast improvement. The rare sparks of talent here are Caine as an elderly priest and Elijah Wood, who stays wide-eyed, airy and Frodo Baggins-like for the entire movie. The greatest disappointment of all is that the ending promises an unfortunate sequel. That comes off like a threat.

PG-13. AMY WOLFE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Cinema 99, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville, Sandy.

some, the effects will be hypnotizing and mind-blowing. For others (like me), The Assassin will come off as a tease, or even a troll, whose central crime is being dull and dismissive. Either way, it’s glorious to look at and impossible to stop pondering. NR. AP KRYZA. Fox Tower.

Beasts of No Nation

B+ Despite its darkness, Beasts is

almost…charming? Abraham Attah, the 14-year-old star, had no acting experience when writer-director Cary Fukunaga (True Detective season 1) discovered him on the streets of Ghana.

The innocence Attah brings to his role as a child soldier is what saves the entire film from being too depressing to sit through. NR. ALEX FALCONE. Living Room Theaters.

Black Mass

A- Much like the city’s other exports,

Boston’s gangster flicks vary in quality from genre-shattering genius (The Departed, most ’90s bands, the people who invented America) to mind-numbing pantomimes of misogyny (The Boondock Saints, Boston sports fans, Mark Wahlberg). Scott Cooper’s Black Mass is the latest cinematic try. It tells the story of Boston’s most notorious criminal, James “Whitey” Bulger (Johnny Depp) and the deal he made with the FBI’s John Connolly (Joel Edgerton) that ensured he could do whatever he wanted for decades. R. JAMES HELMSWORTH. Hollywood, Fox Tower.

Bridge of Spies

B- Steven Spielberg was born to convey viewers through weird and wonderful alternate realities. Even though history is nearly as illusory as a dinosaur theme park, the director’s gift just doesn’t shine as brightly when he contends

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REVIEW C O U R T E S Y O F WA R N E R B R O S P I C T U R E S

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Editor: ENID SPITZ. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: espitz@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension

B+ Eight years ago, Jason Blum’s cheapo horror empire began with a $15,000 festival filler. The sixth and final installment of his “found footage”fueled franchise, Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension, arrives bearing the same tricks as its predecessors.

Longtime series editor Gregory Plotkin finally directs, giving us bravura jump cuts spliced for maximum humor and dread as we watch a normcore suburbanite couple film their beloved daughter drifting toward the clutches of a perhaps-not-imaginary fiend. This time, we’re also treated to 3-D glimpses of the demon via the jerry-rigged VHS camera that the parents found hidden around their new McMansion. Alas, the effects may suffer from first-run showings at Living Room Theaters and the Avalon Theatre since Regal Cinemas— like many chains—was frightened off by the producer’s unholy alliance with an all-too-apropos threat: video on demand. R. JAY HORTON. Avalon, Mill Plain, Oak Grove, Sandy, Joy.

STILL SHOWING Ant-Man

B+ If it were a comic book, it wouldn’t be the kind you put in a Mylar bag. It’d be one that you read with greasy fingers and childlike relish. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Academy, Empirical, Kennedy School, Laurelhurst, Mt. Hood, Vancouver, Valley.

The Assassin

B- Chinese director Hou Hsiao-Hsien’s The Assassin is a bizarre, surreal film.

It follows a mysterious female assassin tasked with killing her royal cousin in ninth-century China, yet the movie takes great pains not to be an action flick.

Characters flit in and out of the narrative with seemingly little consequence.

It is a film packed with a mythos, sometimes overexplained and sometimes very vague. Most importantly, it’s a work of painterly beauty, with the Chinese countryside captured in long, inconsequential shots that linger on flickering flames or peonies swaying in the breeze.

Which is to say, Hsiao-Hsien’s take on the martial-arts epic is divisive. This is a film that’s content to show three seconds of a battle between its heroine (Qi Shu) and an army of imperial guards, then cut away abruptly, never to speak of it again. The director seems set on turning his chosen genre on its head in something of a Chinese arthouse take on the revisionist Western.

It’s an enigmatic, befuddling, frustrating film that doesn’t defy expectations so much as ignores them altogether. For

criSiS avErtEd: Billy Bob thornton and Sandra Bullock.

Politics Suck Our Brand Is Crisis is based loosely on a 2005 documentary, which was based on a 2002 Bolivian presidential election. In a way it’s triple-distilled truth, but mostly it feels like an over-interpreted copy of a copy of a copy.

In case you weren’t following South American politics in the early 2000s, here’s the scene: Bolivia isn’t doing great. Dictators, democracy and internationalization aren’t going over great with the people. In a crowded presidential race, one of the candidates is running on a platform of “everything is fine, so shut up.” He hires American campaign consultants who are so good at making him over, manipulating the press and slandering his opponent that he manages to eke out a victory. Then he turns out to be a dickbag.

The film is a look at how that dickbag sausage was made, following his consultants as they swing the election. But while the documentary was a cautionary tale about exporting American-style politics, the new movie—directed by David Gordon Green (Pineapple Express) and produced by the politically active silver fox George Clooney— drills a simpler message: “Politics are evil.” It’s not a subtle position, but you can tell from the title this is not a movie about nuance. Sandra Bullock is a master campaign strategist, but she hates crowded spaces. Get it? She runs campaigns but hates people. Didn’t catch that? Don’t worry, somebody in the film explains it outright.

The script perches comfortably on the nose, but Bullock adds off-the-nose nuance. Her retired-genius-with-a-troubled-pastand-a-heart-of-gold feels fresh thanks to her fun quirks, like snacking exclusively on potato chips and carrying around a bottle of Newman’s Own Steak Sauce. She even makes cheesy lines like “Nothing is wrong in politics except not winning ” seem like reasonable things for an adult to say. Billy Bob Thornton, who injects sleaze into any script he gets, plays her rival. I could watch them go back and forth (Bullock wins) all day.

The acting and some decently funny moments (like a llama getting hit by a car, which I felt guilty for laughing at) mask the feeling of being force-fed idealism well. But as with all force-feeding, I still ended up feeling sick to my stomach when it was over. ALEX FALCONE. Billy Bob and Bullock save face, and Brand.

B- SEE it: Our Brand Is Crisis is rated R. It opens Friday at Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius and Oak Grove.

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MOVIES

Crimson Peak

B+ There are all manner of ghosts in this gorgeous, tragic tale, but to call it a horror film is to completely mislabel Guillermo del Toro’s meticulously crafted, old-fashioned tale of twisted souls and timeless longing. Scary isn’t really the point. The things that go bump in the night are not nearly so terrifying as the people who walk the earth, and the film is so immersive and gorgeous that the plot is secondary. The film is a little too slow-moving for those expecting something more jolty and probably a little too obvious for those looking for a deep mystery. While it’s not del Toro’s most compelling work, it’s very surely his most beautiful. R. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville, Sandy Cinemas, St. Johns Cinemas.

the teenager comes asking for money for an abortion. R. AP KRYZA. Fox Tower.

He Named Me Malala

Fifteen-year-old Malala Yousafzai became an unlikely household name in 2014, when she spoke out about girls’ education in Pakistan, prompting Taliban shooters to attack her school bus as it drove through Pakistan’s Swat Valley. Following a storm of international media coverage, Yousafzai became the youngest-ever Nobel Peace Prize laureate.

Unsurprisingly, Fox Searchlight decided that’s all lucrative featurefilm fodder. Screened after deadline.

PG-13. Fox Tower.

Hotel Transylvania 2

ishing. PG. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Milwaukie, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville, Sandy.

The Intern

B+ As an active widower and retiree in need of something to keep himself busy, Ben (Robert De Niro) applies to a senior internship program at “About the Fit,” a Topshop-like online clothing site founded by the dedicated Jules Ostin (Anne Hathaway). PG-13.

LAUREN TERRY. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Living Room Theaters, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard.

Adam Sandler’s hotel is flour-

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REVIEW COURTESY OF SONY PICTURES CLASSICS

with humanity’s past. Bridge of Spies, starring Tom Hanks as an insurance lawyer recruited by the U.S. government to negotiate a spy-for-spy trade with the Soviet Union, benefits from a caustic screenplay by the Coen brothers. While Spielberg is pretty good even when he’s on auto-pilot, there is little here that doesn’t feel perfunctory. PG-13. CHRIS STAMM. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Living Room Theaters, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville, Sandy Cinemas, St. Johns Theater.

Everest

B+ In 1996, a stranded group of

climbers, including New Zealand mountaineer Rob Hall (Jason Clarke) and writer Jon Krakauer (Michael Kelly), met a massive storm at the top of the world. Today’s CGI and 3-D technology puts the viewer on the mountain in a visceral way. The competitive tension between Hall and hotshot American climber Scott Fischer (Jake Gyllenhaal) moves the plot along quickly as each man is driven to test the boundaries of safe practices for the sake of pride. PG-13.

LAUREN TERRY. Eastport, Bridgeport, City Center, Evergreen, Fox Tower, Tigard.

Martian, The (PG-13) 11:00AM 2:20PM 5:50PM 9:20PM Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials (PG-13) 1:00PM 7:10PM 10:15PM Woodlawn (PG) 10:55AM 1:50PM 4:45PM 7:40PM 10:35PM Last Witch Hunter, The (PG-13) 11:20AM 12:45PM 2:10PM 5:00PM 6:25PM 7:50PM 9:15PM 10:35PM Martian, The (3D) (PG-13) 1:15PM 1:15PM ® 4:45PM 4:45PM ® 8:10PM 8:10PM ® Sicario (R) 11:05AM 4:40PM 7:35PM 10:35PM Steve Jobs (R) 10:50AM 1:45PM 4:45PM 7:45PM 10:40PM Truth (R) 10:50AM 1:45PM 4:40PM 7:35PM 10:30PM Our Brand Is Crisis (R) 11:05AM 1:50PM 4:35PM 7:20PM 10:10PM Pan (PG) 11:00AM 1:45PM 4:30PM 7:15PM 10:05PM

Rock The Kasbah (R) 1:55PM Crimson Peak (R) 10:50AM 1:40PM 4:35PM 7:30PM 10:25PM Freaks of Nature (R) 12:25PM 2:55PM 5:25PM 7:55PM 10:25PM Goosebumps (3D) (PG) 12:00PM 2:40PM 5:20PM 8:00PM 10:40PM Last Witch Hunter, The (PG-13) 11:20AM ® 2:10PM ® 5:00PM ® 7:50PM ® 10:35PM ® Bridge of Spies (PG-13) 12:10PM 3:30PM 7:00PM 10:20PM Burnt (R) 11:40AM 2:15PM 4:50PM 7:25PM 10:00PM Intern, The (PG-13) 11:00AM 1:50PM 4:40PM 7:35PM 10:30PM Jem And The Holograms (PG) 4:10PM Ladrones (PG-13) 3:35PM Goosebumps (PG) 10:55AM 1:35PM 4:20PM 6:55PM 9:40PM Hotel Transylvania 2 (3D) (PG) 2:00PM 7:00PM Hotel Transylvania 2 (PG) 11:30AM 4:25PM 9:30PM

Martian, The (PG-13) 12:50PM 4:00PM 7:10PM 10:20PM Our Brand Is Crisis (R) 11:40AM 2:20PM 5:00PM 7:40PM 10:20PM Truth (R) 1:00PM 4:00PM 7:00PM 10:00PM Martian, The (3D) (PG-13) 11:30AM 2:40PM 5:50PM 9:00PM Pan (PG) 11:30AM 2:10PM 4:50PM 7:30PM 10:10PM Sicario (R) 1:35PM 4:25PM 7:15PM 10:15PM Steve Jobs (R) 1:20PM 4:20PM 7:15PM 10:20PM Rock The Kasbah (R) 11:35AM 2:10PM 7:40PM 10:15PM Sher (Aakash Movies Inc) (NR) 11:45AM 3:00PM 6:15PM 9:30PM

Burnt (R) 12:00PM 2:30PM 5:00PM 7:30PM 10:00PM Crimson Peak (R) 1:35PM 4:30PM 7:25PM 10:20PM Last Witch Hunter, The (PG-13) 11:40AM 2:15PM 4:50PM 7:30PM 10:10PM Bridge of Spies (PG-13) 12:30PM 3:45PM 7:00PM 10:15PM Goosebumps (3D) (PG) 4:45PM 10:00PM Intern, The (PG-13) 1:20PM 4:10PM 7:10PM 10:05PM Jem And The Holograms (PG) 4:45PM Goosebumps (PG) 11:35AM 2:10PM 7:20PM Hotel Transylvania 2 (PG) 12:45PM 3:05PM 5:25PM 7:45PM 10:10PM

Our Brand Is Crisis (R) 11:25AM 2:15PM 5:00PM 7:40PM 10:20PM Pan (PG) 11:15AM 2:00PM 4:45PM 7:35PM 10:20PM Woodlawn (PG) 12:50PM 3:50PM 6:55PM 9:50PM Martian, The (PG-13) 11:45AM 3:10PM 6:30PM 9:45PM Steve Jobs (R) 1:00PM 4:10PM 7:10PM 10:10PM Truth (R) 12:45PM 3:45PM 7:10PM 10:15PM Rock The Kasbah (R) 2:15PM 7:50PM 10:30PM Sicario (R) 12:40PM 3:40PM 6:35PM 9:35PM Last Witch Hunter, The (PG-13) 11:35AM 2:20PM 5:05PM 7:45PM 10:30PM

Bu rnt (R) 11:15AM 1:50PM 4:20PM 7:00PM 9:40PM Crimson Peak (R) 1:15PM 4:05PM 7:15PM 10:15PM Martian, The (3D) (PG-13) 12:55PM 4:30PM 8:00PM Bridge of Spies (PG-13) 12:00PM 3:20PM 6:40PM 9:55PM Hotel Transylvania 2 (PG) 11:20AM 1:50PM 4:15PM 6:50PM 9:15PM Jem And The Holograms (PG) 11:25AM 5:00PM Everest (PG-13) 1:05PM 4:00PM 7:05PM 10:05PM Goosebumps (PG) 11:30AM 2:10PM 4:50PM 7:30PM 10:10PM

Martian, The (XD-3D) (PG-13) 12:00PM 3:30PM 7:05PM 10:25PM

FRIDAY 56

Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

Goodnight Mommy

B+ There’s a twist at the cold heart

of German directors Severin Fiala and Veronika Franz’s Goodnight Mommy that most viewers will probably see coming, but that doesn’t kill any of the tension in this deeply troubling horror show. Set in an isolated lake house, the film centers on twin brothers Lukas and Elias, whose mother (Susanne Wuest) comes home from facial reconstruction surgery with a head wrapped in bandages and a newfound malevolence toward her sons. R. AP KRYZA. Cinema 21, Kiggins.

Goosebumps

A- It’s easy to be skeptical about a 2015 Goosebumps film in 3-D. Jack Black plays R.L. Stine, who joins forces with a couple of cute kids to fight every monster he’s ever written about and save the town. The movie is cheap-looking, and there are more logical flaws than I could possibly list in this space, but the premise is clever, the action is fun, the jokes land, and it’s only a little bit scary.

Just like the books. So put away your cold, blackened heart and enjoy the silly fun of Jack Black running around with a bunch of monsters. PG. ALEX FALCONE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Milwaukie Cinema & Wunderland, Oak Grove, Cinema 99, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville, Sandy.

Grandma

C+ Like a feminist companion piece to last year’s Bill Murray feature St. Vincent, Paul Weitz’s Grandma tells the tale of Elle (Lily Tomlin), who takes her neglected granddaughter (Julia Garner) under her wing when

HISTORICAL FICTION: Cate Blanchett (right) and the cast of Truth.

Would You Rather...?

What you’ve heard about James Vanderbilt’s American media biopic Truth is true.

This is a confusing mess of a movie, full of troubling implications about journalistic ethics. But there are many other horrible things about it.

At one point, referencing how disgraced 60 Minutes producer Mary Mapes (Cate Blanchett) was physically abused by her father, one character asks: “She would get beat up just for asking questions?”

We can all agree that people shouldn’t get beat up for asking questions. But Vanderbilt turned that idea into an entire movie.

Bam. Artist.

Since he loves ethical questions so much, I’ve prepared some for him: Question: Topher Grace, why?

Question: Why is everyone in this movie a drunk? Dan Rather (Robert Redford) is constantly three-plus drinks in, Mapes empties an entire bottle of wine into her glass, and her father is an abusive alcoholic. But remember—Rather and Mapes are the good kind of alcoholic.

Question: Why does the movie seem better if you plug your ears? Calm scenes of Rather sipping whiskey on a balcony are a nice pacing contrast to Mapes frantically fielding work calls while making her son’s breakfast. But when you pull your fingers out of your ears, you can hear the painfully Sorkin-esque script and prescriptive soundtrack.

Question: Why do the antagonists have the most compelling lines?

The protagonists are drunks with dubious ethics, so it’s left to the bureaucrats, lawyers and normies to say sensible things. I felt like cheering every time someone with a boring job came onscreen.

Question: Why is Lucy Scott played by a cardboard cutout of Elizabeth Moss? In Truth, Moss sits silently, smiles and sometimes stands in front of whiteboards. When she finally gets a line, it’s so surprising you’re almost distracted from the fact that the line is totally pointless.

Question: Why is Dennis Quaid always smiling?

Answer: He’s just happy to have gotten some acting work.

ZACH MIDDLETON. Truth questions “truth.”

We question Truth.

B- SEE IT: Truth is rated R. It opens Friday at most Portland-area theaters.

HOPPER STONE, SMPSP

goosebumps

Jem and the Holograms

The 1980s girl-power cartoon about a rock band that solves crimes on the side gets the live-action treatment in a film by Jon Chu (G.I. Joe Retaliation, Step Up). PG. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Cinema 99, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville, Sandy.

The Martian

B- Take the buzz surrounding The Martian with a boulder of salt. It’s just a pretty good sci-fi yarn based on Andy Weir’s book that stumbles on its own ambition. When a massive storm hits the Martian exploration project and Watney’s team leaves him for dead, the skilled botanist realizes that the only way to escape starvation and space madness is to “science the shit” out of his situation.

As always, Scott’s direction is spoton. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Bagdad, Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Edgefield, Lake Theater, Moreland, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville, Roseway Theatre, Sandy, St. Johns Cinemas.

Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials

Still runnin’. PG-13. ALEX FALCONE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cinema 99, Bridgeport, Division, Evergreen, Movies on TV. C

Meet the Patels

B- Ravi Patel has American dreams of finding his soulmate. PG. LAUREN TERRY. Fox Tower.

Mission: Impossible: Rogue Nation

A None of this film’s merits is unique to the Tom Cruise-led series, but they add up to something that’s topof-class for the genre. PG-13. ALEX FALCONE. Vancouver.

Mistress America

B- Greta Gerwig’s newest collaboration with director Noah Baumbach has depreciated every day since I saw it. It’s a buddy movie about two intolerably self-centered women in New York. PG-13. ALEX FALCONE. Laurelhurst.

Pan

Director Joe Wright (Atonement, Pride & Prejudice, Hanna) remakes the iconic children’s story as a modern-day action flick with Hugh Jackman and Rooney Mara. Screened after deadline. PG. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV.

Rock the Kasbah

C- I love a good fish-out-of-water story, but why do all the fish have to be old white guys? In Rock the Kasbah, Bill Murray plays a hasbeen—or perhaps never-was—rock

manager named Richie Lanz, whose favorite client (the insufferable Zooey Deschanel) finds her way onto a USO tour of the war-torn Middle East. This should perfectly set the stage for Murray to improvise his way through the film without a clumsy plot to keep him in check, as he did during his late-career peak (Lost in Translation, Broken Flowers). But director Barry Levinson has other ideas—including armed showdowns, a hooker with a heart of gold (Kate Hudson), and mansplaining the world to angry Arabs. If the movie doesn’t fully collapse under the weight of all that sound and fury, it at least bows.

I can hear the sighs and groans. “It’s just a comedy,” you say. And if Rock the Kasbah were a fully slapstick affair, I wouldn’t nitpick it so much.

But while the film’s not-so-subtle message is about women’s liberation, male characters run the show. In the end, Rock the Kasbah isn’t so much offensive as it is painfully boring.

There just have to be other fish in the sea. R. CASEY JARMAN. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Forest Theatre, Cinema 99, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Fox Tower, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville.

Sicario

A Emily Blunt (The Devil Wears

Prada) is a talented FBI agent specially recruited into a task force fighting a brutal war against Mexican drug cartels. She spends the whole movie confused and on edge while taking orders from the mysterious Benicio Del Toro (Snatch), who manages to act without ever fully opening his eyes or mouth. As the real mission of the task force slowly takes shape, so do beautiful sweeping helicopter shots of the border zone and heartbreaking vignettes of all the people affected by drug war. R. ALEX FALCONE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Fox Tower, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Tigard.

Steve Jobs

B This is the more high-profile and undoubtedly better of the two movies, with Danny Boyle at the helm and Michael Fassbender (12 Years a Slave) in the lead role instead of Ashton Kutcher (Dude, Where’s My Car?). The film isn’t a glowing portrayal of Jobs, but it’s also not the hack job that writer Aaron Sorkin did on Mark Zuckerberg in The Social Network either. Sorkin sets the movie entirely in the minutes right before three of Jobs’ major keynote speeches: This three-act concept makes sense on the surface, but in practice it feels gimmicky and limiting to force exposition of every major aspect of Jobs’ life into backstage conversations just before the most important public presentations of his life. The film’s saving grace is the acting. Never seeming quite human, Fassbender’s Jobs oscillates between enthusiasm for his own ideas and

outrage that the world can’t keep up with him, in exactly the way that people close to the genius described him. R. ALEX FALCONE. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, CineMagic Theatre, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Cinema 99, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Fox Tower, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville.

Trainwreck

C Amy Schumer is the absolute tops, but Trainwreck isn’t worth the ticket price. R. ALEX FALCONE. Academy, Laurelhurst, Valley.

Vacation

D+ You can look forward to the same opening tune of Lindsey Buckingham’s “Holiday Road,” but this spin on 1983’s National Lampoon’s Vacation replaces the original’s irreverent, campy charm with puke scenes. R. LAUREN TERRY. Vancouver.

Victoria

B+ A two-hour-plus, city-spanning

crime drama that was filmed in just a single extended shot (and reportedly completed on only the third take), Victoria deserves attention for harboring such seemingly impossible ambitions. Director Sebastian Schipper manufactures an intricate choreography of street life and character interplay to compensate for the absence of story-advancing edits in this film about four Berlin bank robbers orchestrating a heist. But the film never feels like an empty spectacle. Though the pace lags as conventional genre elements appear (mobsters, police, the getaway plan), the film’s continuous motion perfectly captures that internal momentum of fast friends and poor decisions made during an extended debauch. And those opening scenes—in which a Spanish cafe girl meets up with the mismatched band of boozy hoodlums to roam the seamier side of early-morning Berlin—burst from the screen in a furious whirl of reckless youth, untamed and defiantly uncut.

NR. JAY HORTON. Cinema 21.

The Visit

B- M. Night Shyamalamadingdong has lost the luster of his early career, so it’s no surprise he’s making little $5 million found-footage horror movies. PG-13. ALEX FALCONE. Movies on TV.

The Walk

B Pulling off a moving film about Phillipe Petit’s walk on a tightrope between the Twin Towers sounds next to impossible. But for better or worse, director Robert Zemeckis has never been too concerned about what’s possible. PG. CASEY JARMAN. Eastport, Movies on TV.

For more Movies listings, visit

Cannabis news, culture & reviews from Portland.

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MOVIES RICK VODICKA

AP FILM STUDIES

Fright Night ALL THE PORTLAND HORROR.

BY A P KRYZA

apkryza@wweek.com

Halloween is Saturday. Even though you hate horror movies, you will watch one. You could be a shut-in and watch Netflix crap, but it’s a scientific fact that horror movies are best consumed with a crowd. With beer. Here’s where you should go on All Hallows’ Eve, and whether you need to pack extra underwear. See the full list at wweek.com.

Goodnight Mommy

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What it is: A slow-burning combination of body horror, creepy-kid nightmares and p sy c h o l o g i c a l t r a u m a i n which twin brothers resort to disturbing measures when their mother returns from facial-reconstruction surgery and begins acting strangely, triggering suspicions that she’s not who she says she is.

Who it will scare: People with kids; people who are uncomfortable with kids; anyone who has ever accidentally glued their fingers together.

Cinema 21. Through Oct. 29.

The Exorcist

What it is: Possibly the most notorious (and maybe best?) horror film of all time, the tale of two priests, a demon and a possessed little girl who lets Jesus inside her in the worst possible way.

Who it will scare: I have met approximately one person who wasn’t scared shitless by this movie.

And I married her for protection.

Academy Theater; through Oct. 31. Mission Theater; 5:30 and 8:30 pm Saturday, Oct. 31.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show Halloween Special

What it is: The Clinton brings the ruckus every weekend, but for Halloween it goes all out with costumes, prizes and its biggest crowds of the year.

Who it will scare: Newbies with stage fright; certain Gresham bakeries.

Clinton Street Theater. 8:30 pm Friday, 8:30 and 11:59 pm Saturday, Oct. 30-31.

The Fly

What it is: David Cronenberg ’s pus-spewing remake of the Vincent Price classic, featuring Jeff Goldblum as a scientist who splices DNA with a fly while researching teleportation. In 1986, it became a hallmark of the body-horror genre. Nearly 30 years later, it’s seldom topped.

Who it will scare: Anybody with even a slightly weak stomach; Goldblum fetishists; arm wrestlers.

5th Avenue Cinema. 7 and 9:30 pm FridaySaturday, 3 pm Sunday, Oct. 30-Nov. 1.

From Dusk Till Dawn

What it is: Exactly what you’d expect from Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino: a scattershot film about two criminals (George Clooney and Tarantino) on a bloody rampage who kidnap a Christian family and end up at a Mexican strip club where the dancers are vampires preying on truck drivers. Also, there’s a gun shaped like a dick and balls. It’s as dumb as it sounds. And a lot of fun.

Who it will scare: Everybody… have you seen Tarantino try to act?

Hollywood Theatre. 7 pm Saturday, Oct. 31.

The Golem

What it is: A silent, expressionist German horror fantasy from 1920 in which a rabbi creates a clay golem to protect Jews from persecution. Then it comes to life with lust and murder on its mind. Local composer Beth Karp provides a live score.

Who it will scare: Mel Gibson.

HART Theatre. 7:30 pm Saturday, Oct. 31.

Norway

What it is: A 2014 Greek movie about a vampire looking for love amid the club culture of 1980s Athens, like a much less hipstery version of Only Lovers Left Alive.

Who it will scare: Disco haters.

NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Saturday, Oct. 31.

ALSO SHOWING (BUT NOT SCARY):

In conjunction with its Guitar: The Instrument That Rocked the World exhibit, OMSI features U2 3D and Brian De Palma’s Phantom of the Paradise.

Empirical Theater. See OMSI.edu for full listings.

Did you love La Femme Nikita but wished it had more Lorenzo Lamas and O.J. Simpson? B-Movie Bingo has you covered with CIA Codename Alexa.

Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Tuesday, Nov. 3.

COURTESY OF BROOKSFILMS

MOVIES

BE VERY AFRAID: The Fly screens at 5th Avenue Cinema on Oct. 30-Nov. 1.

Regal Lloyd Center 10 & IMAX

1510 NE Multnomah St. CRIMSON PEAK: THE IMAX EXPERIENCE Wed -Thu 1:00, 4:05 TCM PRESENTS DRACULA (1931) / DRáCULA (1931) Wed 2:00, 7:00 ROCK THE KASBAH Wed -Thu 12:40, 3:35, 6:35, 9:40 THE LAST WITCH HUNTER Wed Thu 12:30, 3:40, 7:25, 10:15 BRIDGE OF SPIES Wed -Thu 12:00, 3:20, 6:40, 9:55 GOOSEBUMPS Wed -Thu 12:55, 9:35 GOOSEBUMPS 3D Wed-Thu 3:50, 6:55 THE MARTIAN Wed-Thu 12:05, 8:00 STEVE JOBS Wed -Thu 12:50, 3:55, 7:00, 10:05 THE MARTIAN 3D Wed-Thu 3:25, 9:30 HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 2 Wed-Thu 12:15, 2:40, 5:05, 7:30, 9:50 SICARIO Wed-Thu 12:35, 3:30, 6:30 THE MARTIAN: AN IMAX 3D EXPERIENCE Thu 7:00, 10:20 PAN Thu 12:20, 3:05 THE INTERN Thu 6:20, 9:25

Regal Division Street Stadium 13

16603 SE Division St. JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS Wed-Thu 12:05, 3:05, 7:00, 10:05 ROCK THE KASBAH Wed-Thu 11:50, 2:25, 5:00, 7:35, 10:15 THE LAST WITCH HUNTER Wed-Thu 11:45, 2:20, 4:55, 7:30, 10:10 BRIDGE OF SPIES Wed-Thu 12:00, 3:25, 6:50, 9:35 CRIMSON PEAK Wed-Thu 12:15, 3:10, 7:15, 10:05 GOOSEBUMPS Wed-Thu 11:40, 4:55, 10:15 GOOSEBUMPS 3D Wed -Thu 2:15, 7:35 PAN Wed -Thu 11:30, 2:10, 7:30 PAN 3D Wed-Thu 4:50, 10:10 STEVE JOBS Wed-Thu 12:30, 3:30, 6:45, 9:50 THE MARTIAN Wed-Thu 12:10, 9:30 THE MARTIAN 3D Wed-Thu 3:20, 6:55 HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 2 Wed-Thu 11:35, 2:00, 4:40 THE INTERN Wed-Thu 11:55, 7:10 MAZE RUNNER: THE SCORCH TRIALS Wed -Thu 2:50, 9:45 SICARIO Wed Thu 12:20, 3:15, 6:35, 9:55 WAR ROOM Wed-Thu 12:25, 3:35, 6:40, 10:00 BURNT Thu 7:00, 10:15

Avalon Theatre & Wunderland

3451 SE Belmont St., 503-238-1617 PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: THE GHOST DIMENSION Wed-Thu 1:00, 1:30, 3:00, 3:30, 5:00, 5:30, 7:00, 7:30, 9:00, 9:30

Bagdad Theater

3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 THE MARTIAN Wed-ThuFri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 12:00, 3:15, 7:00, 10:45

Cinema 21

616 NW 21st Ave., 503-223-4515 GOODNIGHT MOMMY Wed Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 7:45, 9:45 MERU Wed-Thu-

Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 4:00, 6:30, 8:45 VICTORIA Wed Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 5:00 ASIAN FILM FESTIVAL Wed 5:00, 7:00 LABYRINTH OF LIES Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 3:45, 6:45, 9:15

Clinton Street Theater

2522 SE Clinton St., 503-238-8899 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY Wed -Tue MOTO 7 Thu 7:30 ZOMBIE CATS FROM MARS Fri-Sat-Sun 6:00 THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW Fri-Sat 8:30, 12:00 GUIGNOLFEST 2015 SunMon 9:00

St. Johns Cinemas

8704 N Lombard St., 503-286-1768 THE MARTIAN Wed-ThuFri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 4:00, 7:00, 10:00 CRIMSON PEAK Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 4:30, 7:30, 10:10

CineMagic Theatre

2021 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-231-7919 STEVE JOBS Wed-Thu-FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:30

Kiggins Theatre

1011 Main St., 360-816-0352 EXTRAORDINARY TALES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 8:30 GOODNIGHT MOMMY FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 6:30

Regal City Center Stadium 12

801 C St. JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS Wed-Thu 12:10, 3:00, 5:50, 9:00 ROCK THE KASBAH Wed-Thu 11:00, 1:35, 4:05, 6:35, 9:05 THE LAST WITCH HUNTER Wed-Thu 12:20, 3:05, 5:40, 8:10 BRIDGE OF SPIES Wed-Thu 11:15, 2:25, 5:35, 8:45 CRIMSON PEAK Wed-Thu 11:45, 2:35, 5:25, 8:15 GOOSEBUMPS Wed-Thu 11:05, 3:55, 8:55 GOOSEBUMPS 3D Wed-Thu 1:30, 6:20 PAN Wed-Thu 11:30, 4:55 PAN 3D Wed-Thu 2:10, 8:00 STEVE JOBS Wed -Thu 12:00, 2:55, 5:55, 8:50 THE MARTIAN Wed-Thu 11:10, 8:40 THE MARTIAN 3D Wed-Thu 2:20, 5:30 HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 2 Wed -Thu 1:00, 3:30, 6:00, 8:30 THE INTERN Wed-Thu 11:55, 2:50 EVEREST Wed-Thu 11:25, 5:10 SICARIO Wed-Thu 2:15, 8:05 BURNT Thu 7:00, 9:25

Century 16 Eastport Plaza

4040 SE 82nd Ave. PAN Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-

Mon-Tue 11:15, 2:00, 4:45, 7:35, 10:20 GOOSEBUMPS Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 11:30, 2:10, 4:50, 7:30, 10:10 GOOSEBUMPS 3D Wed-Thu 2:00, 10:10 MAZE RUNNER: THE SCORCH TRIALS Wed-Thu 12:55, 4:05, 7:10, 10:15 EVEREST Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 1:05, 4:00, 7:05, 10:05 HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 2 Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue 11:20, 1:50, 4:15, 6:50, 9:15 WOODLAWN Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 12:50, 3:50, 6:55, 9:50 SICARIO Wed-Thu-Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 12:40, 3:40, 6:35, 9:35 THE MARTIAN Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 11:45, 3:10, 6:30, 9:45 THE MARTIAN 3D Wed-ThuFri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 12:55, 4:30, 8:00 STEVE JOBS Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 1:00, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10 CRIMSON PEAK Wed-ThuFri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 1:15, 4:05, 7:15, 10:15 BRIDGE OF SPIES Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue 12:00, 3:20, 6:40, 9:55 ROCK THE KASBAH Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 2:15, 7:50, 10:30 JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS Wed-Thu-Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 11:25, 5:00 THE LAST WITCH HUNTER Wed-ThuFri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 11:35, 2:20, 5:05, 7:45, 10:30 TCM PRESENTS DRACULA (1931) / DRáCULA (1931) Wed 2:00, 7:00 THE INTERN Thu 10:50, 4:40 THE WALK Thu 10:30 THE WALK 3D Thu 1:45, 7:35 BURNT Thu-FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 11:15, 1:50, 4:20, 7:00, 9:40 TRUTH FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 12:45, 3:45, 7:10, 10:15 OUR BRAND IS CRISIS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 11:25, 2:15, 5:00, 7:40, 10:20

Kennedy School Theater

5736 NE 33rd Ave., 503-249-7474 MINIONS Wed-Thu 5:30 ANT-MAN Wed-Thu-FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 7:50 THE MONSTER SQUAD Wed -Thu 10:20 INSIDE OUT Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 5:30 CARRIE Fri-Sat-Sun 10:20

5th Avenue Cinema

510 SW Hall St., 503-725-3551 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY Wed-Thu-Mon-Tue THE FLY Fri-Sat-Sun 3:00

Regal Fox Tower Stadium 10

846 SW Park Ave. ROCK THE KASBAH Wed Thu 12:50, 4:00, 7:15, 10:00 THE ASSASSIN Wed -Thu 12:30, 3:15, 6:50, 9:30

STEVE JOBS Wed-Thu 12:15, 1:00, 1:45, 3:00, 3:45, 4:30, 6:20, 7:20, 9:15, 9:45 HE NAMED ME MALALA Wed Thu 12:00 BLACK MASS Wed-Thu 12:10, 3:30, 6:40, 9:40 EVEREST Wed -Thu 12:20, 3:20, 6:20, 9:00 MEET THE PATELS Wed-Thu 2:40, 4:50, 9:40 SICARIO Wed Thu 12:40, 4:20, 7:10, 9:50 GRANDMA Wed-Thu 12:00, 2:15, 4:40 STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON Wed-Thu 6:30, 9:20 ROOM Thu 7:00, 9:30 BURNT Thu 7:00

NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium

1219 SW Park Ave., 503-221-1156 OUT OF NATURE Wed 7:00 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY Thu-Mon GRISLY, GHASTLY, GHOULISH ANIMATED HORROR Fri 7:00 I WALKED WITH A ZOMBIE Fri-Sat 8:45 DOWNTOWN 81 Sat 4:30 NORWAY Sat 7:00 MY SKINNY SISTER Sun 2:30 MONICA Z Sun 4:15 (T) ERROR Sun 7:00 UNA VIDA: A FABLE OF MUSIC AND THE MIND Tue 7:00

Regal Pioneer Place Stadium 6

340 SW Morrison St. JEM AND THE HOLOGRAMS Wed-Thu 12:00, 3:00, 6:30, 9:30 THE LAST WITCH HUNTER Wed-Thu 1:00, 4:00, 7:20, 10:10 CRIMSON PEAK Wed-Thu 12:30, 3:45, 7:00, 10:00 GOOSEBUMPS Wed-Thu 12:20, 9:50 GOOSEBUMPS 3D Wed -Thu 3:20, 6:15 THE MARTIAN Wed-Thu 12:10, 6:45 THE MARTIAN 3D Wed-Thu 3:30, 9:20 HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 2 Wed-Thu 12:40, 3:10, 7:10, 9:40 SPECTRE Tue 7:00

St. Johns Theater

8203 N Ivanhoe St., 503-249-7474-6 BRIDGE OF SPIES Wed -Thu 12:00, 3:30, 7:00

Living Room Theaters 341 SW 10th Ave., 971-222-2010 BEASTS OF NO NATION Wed-Thu 2:20, 9:10 BRIDGE OF SPIES Wed-Thu 12:00, 1:00, 2:00, 4:00, 5:00, 6:50, 7:45, 9:00, 9:35 MR. HOLMES Wed-Thu 11:40, 5:10, 7:30 PARANORMAL ACTIVITY: THE GHOST DIMENSION Wed-Thu 11:55, 2:50, 4:50, 7:00, 10:25 PAWN SACRIFICE Wed -Thu 11:50, 1:50, 4:15, 6:40, 9:45 THE INTERN Wed-Thu 11:45, 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45

SUBJECT TO CHANGE. CALL THEATERS OR VISIT WWEEK.COM/MOVIETIMES FOR THE MOST UP-TO-DATE INFORMATION FRIDAY-THURSDAY, OCT. 30-NOV. 5, UNLESS OTHERWISE INDICATED

HAPPY HALLOWEEN Willamette Week OCTOBER 28, 2015 wweek.com

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END ROLL

Go.Pen Plus

6814 NE Glisan St., Portland, OR 97213 Call to preorder and pick up at the window with cash and a valid ID

(503)252-0036

One of the easiest and most discreet ways to get high is with an oil-slash-wax vaporizer pen. That goes double when the pen is about the size of an actual pen, like the Go.Pen Plus by O.penVape.

It’s only about 5 inches in length with an elliptical footprint and sleek profile. Between puffs it slides invisibly into pockets or purses.

T he a e sthetic s of the Go.Pen are quite nice, with the exception of one major hiccup: the oil tank, which is made of clear plastic so you can see how much you’ve used. Unfortunately, hash oil is sludgy and brown, like something that would seep from a septic wound. (Or maybe I’m just a little too high…)

Despite its small size, the charge on the battery is strong, and the device produces a draw so smooth you may not even know it’s working until you exhale a thick plume. When I exhaled, however, I discovered the oil I purchased was extremely harsh, and every time I used the pen I was sent into brutal, drooling coughing fits.

Of course, it’s not the Go.Pen’s fault that I bought crappy oil. Blame the state of Oregon, which doesn’t allow recreational consumers to buy it at this point. So I went to Washington,

and ended up at a dispensary with only two options for oil (if the pen worked with cartridges, I’d have dozens of choices). If you are planning to use oil in the pen, make sure you have a good source.

The other problem plaguing the Go.Pen: It feels sort of cheap and mass-produced. Because it is. There are nearly a dozen other vaporizers sold under different names (CloudV, Cloud Pen 2.0, Micro G Pen, etc.) that are essentially the same product. The atomizing coil in the Go.Pen fits a little too snuggly, but the plastic feels cheap enough that it would eventually wear out. The nice folks at O.penVape included an extra atomizer because it does invariably burn out, a reminder that you’ll need another replacement after that one.

The Go.Pen is a pretty st r a i g h t f o r wa r d a n d e f f e c tive device, but it’s far from perfect. At $69.99, it’s much more expensive than cartridge-based oil pens. If you’re new to concentrates, try them with a cartridge vaporizer, because it has lower buy-in and you’ll be replacing the atomizer at some point.

There’s not a lot of downside to an entry-level cartridge vaporizer unless you’ve got plenty of your own oil. And if you’ve used them and like them, maybe go for something that’s better made with more features—unless you’re worried about leaving it in your pants and washing it. Given how small this baby is, that could happen. ZACH MIDDLETON.

OWL TURD COMIX

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WELLNESS

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CHATLINES

JONESIN’

REAL PEOPLE REAL DESIRE REAL FUN

by Matt Jones

“Word Jubilee”–freestyle in action.

54 Ralph Bakshi movie that was the first X-rated animated feature 58 Arkansas governor Hutchinson 59 Long-term aspirations 60 D.J.’s dad, on “Roseanne” 61 Solid yellow line’s meaning, on the road 62 “___ Came of Age” (Sarah Brightman album)

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Across 1 TV room 4 Decider in a tennis match, perhaps 13 Shiba ___ (such breed. many doge. wow.)

14 Hexadecimal 16 “Charlie’s Angels” director 17 #15 on AFI’s “100 Years ... 100 Movie Quotes,” from a 1982 film 18 Shake your hips 20 Drum kit components 21 Sluggish

22 Musical notes after mis 25 Dropbox files, often 26 Schwarzenegger movie based on a Philip K. Dick story 30 Tight-lipped 31 Sentiment akin to “Ain’t no shame in that!”

32 Phrase in French cookery 33 Pkg. measures 36 Lets in a view of 37 Photographer Goldin 38 Coaching legend

Parseghian 39 Hairpieces in old portraits 41 Type of card for a smartphone 42 Travel widely 46 Actor Lukas of “Witness” 48 “Can’t Fight This Feeling” band ___ Speedwagon 49 Berkshire Hathaway headquarters 50 Skateboarding 101 jumps 53 Some Emmy winners

Down 1 Dope 2 Setting for a 1992 Fraser/Shore comedy 3 Pepsi Center player 4 Boarding pass datum 5 Source of a Shakespearean snake bite 6 “Whatevs” 7 That thing, to Torquemada 8 Wrestling victories 9 Animals in the game “The Oregon Trail” 10 “___ to Be You” 11 Like some buildings with arches and columns 12 California city where Erle Stanley Gardner wrote his Perry Mason novels 14 Guides around the waistline 15 “WKRP in Cincinnati” news director Les 19 #696969, in hexadecimal color code

22 Djokovic rival 23 Poisonous plant also known as monkshood 24 “Oh yeah?”

27 Calcutta coin 28 Army officer below captain, in slang 29 Flowering groundcover plants in the apt genus Pulmonaria 33 Clean 34 Dress rehearsal 35 2006 appointee, to friends 40 “Brave New World” feel-good drug 43 Best Western competitor 44 Some long-haired dogs, for short 45 Coca-Cola bottled water brand 47 Ground-based unit?

51 Cornell of Cornell University 52 Fr. holy women 53 “Consarnit!”

55 Some printers 56 He played “The Ugly” opposite Clint’s “The Good” and Lee’s “The Bad” 57 Monster container last week’s answers

©2015 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #JONZ751.

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Week of October 29

ARIES (March 21-April 19): On a January morning in 1943, the town of Spearfish, South Dakota experienced very weird weather. At 7:30 a.m. the temperature was minus 4 degrees Fahrenheit. In the next two minutes, due to an unusual type of wind sweeping down over nearby Lookout Mountain, thermometers shot up 49 degrees. Over the next hour and a half, the air grew even warmer. But by 9:30, the temperature had plummeted back to minus 4 degrees. I’m wondering if your moods might swing with this much bounce in the coming weeks. As long as you keep in mind that no single feeling is likely to last very long, it doesn’t have to be a problem.

You may even find a way to enjoy the breathtaking ebbs and flows. Halloween costume suggestion: roller coaster rider, Jekyll and Hyde, warm clothes on one side of your body and shorts or bathing suit on the other.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): How dare you be so magnetic and tempting? What were you thinking when you turned up the intensity of your charm to such a high level? I suggest you consider exercising more caution about expressing your radiance. People may have other things to do besides daydreaming about you. But if you really can’t bring yourself to be a little less attractive -if you absolutely refuse to tone yourself down -- please at least try to be extra kind and generous. Share your emotional wealth. Overflow with more than your usual allotments of blessings. Halloween costume suggestion: a shamanic Santa Claus; a witchy Easter Bunny.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In the last ten days of November and the month of December, I suspect there will be wild-card interludes when you can enjoy smart gambles, daring stunts, cute tricks, and mythic escapades. But the next three weeks will not be like that.

On the contrary. For the immediate future, I think you should be an upstanding citizen, a well-behaved helper, and a dutiful truth-teller. Can you handle that? If so, I bet you will get sneak peaks of the fun and productive mischief that could be yours in the last six weeks of 2015. Halloween costume suggestion: the most normal person in the world.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Members of the gazelle species known as the springbok periodically engage in a behavior known as pronking. They leap into the air and propel themselves a great distance with all four feet off the ground, bounding around with abandon. What evolutionary purpose does this serve? Some scientists are puzzled, but not naturalist David Attenborough. In the documentary film Africa, he follows a springbok herd as it wanders through the desert for months, hoping to find a rare rainstorm. Finally it happens. As if in celebration, the springboks erupt with an outbreak of pronking.

“They are dancing for joy,” Attenborough declares. Given the lucky breaks and creative breakthroughs coming your way, Cancerian, I foresee you doing something similar. Halloween costume suggestion: a pronking gazelle, a hippety-hopping bunny, a boisterous baby goat.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “A very little key will open a very heavy door,” wrote Charles Dickens in his short story “Hunted Down.” Make that one of your guiding meditations in the coming days, Leo. In the back of your mind, keep visualizing the image of a little key opening a heavy door. Doing so will help ensure that you’ll be alert when clues about the real key’s location become available. You will have a keen intuitive sense of how you’ll need to respond if you want to procure it. Halloween costume suggestion: proud and protective possessor of a magic key.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): The ancient Hindu text known as the Kama Sutra gives extensive advice about many subjects, including love and sex. “Though a man loves a woman ever so much,” reads a passage in chapter four, “he never succeeds in winning her without a great deal of talking.” Take that as your cue, Virgo. In the coming weeks, stir up the intimacy you want with a great deal of incisive talking that beguiles and entertains.

Furthermore, use the same approach to round up any other experience you yearn for. The way you play with language will be crucial in your efforts to fulfill your wishes. Luckily, I expect your persuasive powers to be even greater than they usually are. Halloween costume suggestion: the ultimate salesperson.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I encourage you to be super rhythmical and melodious in the coming days.

Don’t just sing in the shower and in the car. Hum and warble and whistle while shopping for vegetables and washing the dishes and walking the dog. Allot yourself more than enough time to shimmy and cavort, not just on the dance floor but anywhere else you can get away with it. For extra credit, experiment with lyrical flourishes whenever you’re in bed doing the jizzle-skazzle.

Halloween costume suggestion: wandering troubadour, street musician, free-styling rapper, operatic diva, medicine woman who heals with sound.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): I expect you to be in a state of continual birth for the next four weeks. Awakening and activation will come naturally. Your drive to blossom and create may be irresistible, bordering on unruly. Does that sound overwhelming? I don’t think it will be a problem as long as you cultivate a mood of amazed amusement about how strong it feels. To help maintain your poise, keep in mind that your growth spurt is a natural response to the dissolution that preceded it. Halloween costume suggestion: a fountain, an erupting volcano, the growing beanstalk from the “Jack and the Beanstalk” fairy tale.

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SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “Just as a snake sheds its skin, we must shed our past over and over again.” So says Buddhist teacher Jack Kornfield. Can you guess why I’m bringing it to your attention, Sagittarius? It’s one of those times when you can do yourself a big favor by sloughing off the stale, worn-out, decaying parts of your past. Luckily for you, you now have an extraordinary talent for doing just that. I suspect you will also receive unexpected help and surprising grace as you proceed. Halloween costume suggestion: a snake molting its skin.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Speaking on behalf of your wild mind, I’m letting you know that you’re due for an immersion in revelry and festivity. Plugging away at business as usual could become counterproductive unless you take at least brief excursions to the frontiers of pleasure. High integrity may become sterile unless you expose it to an unpredictable adventure or two. Halloween costume suggestion: party animal, hell raiser, social butterfly, god or goddess of delight. Every one of us harbors a touch of crazy genius that periodically needs to be unleashed, and now is that time for you.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I hope you will chose a Halloween costume that emboldens you to feel powerful. For the next three weeks, it’s in your long-term interest to invoke a visceral sense of potency, dominion, and sovereignty. What clothes and trappings might stimulate these qualities in you? Those of a king or queen? A rock star or CEO? A fairy godmother, superhero, or dragon-tamer? Only you know which archetypal persona will help stir up your untapped reserves of confidence and command.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): It’s time to stretch the boundaries, Pisces. You have license to expand the containers and outgrow the expectations and wage rebellion for the sheer fun of it. The frontiers are calling you.

Your enmeshment in small talk and your attachment to trivial wishes are hereby suspended. Your mind yearns to be blown and blown and blown again! I dare you to wander outside your overly safe haven and go in quest of provocative curiosities. Halloween costume suggestions: mad scientist, wild-eyed revolutionary, Dr. Who.

Homework What is your greatest fear? Make fun of it this Halloween. Tell me about it at FreeWillAstrology.com.

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