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INBOX WINGING IT IN NYC

My sons and I, who have eaten at [Andy] Ricker’s places in Portland, recently enjoyed dinner at Pok Pok Wing [“Thai Hard,” WW, Feb. 1, 2012].

The food is good, and the Portlanders might even succeed where others have failed: teaching New Yorkers grammar, syntax and manners.

—“Jerry Adams” I just wonder, really, why people always have to go big and go national? Isn’t it enough to make a good (a great!) living at home, employing locally and staying humble? I honestly don’t understand why small businesses are so eager to become big ones, at seemingly any cost. I don’t bear this guy any ill will, so long as he doesn’t contribute to the sell-out-ification of PDX (I’m looking at you, Stumptown), but I gotta wonder.

—“anatta” Kudos on a wonderful cover story! Andy is clearly one of the most selfless, humble people out there, and I’m proud to have him representing PDX to N.Y. and elsewhere. His talent has been appreciated by us locals for years, and I would hate to see people turn on him now for having the nads to expand and attempt to make a living.

—“PtH”

TWO SIDES OF BRADY

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

MONEY AND CANDIDATES

Wow, a fairly stark contrast: Big-money interests like developers and bankers are putting their faith and trust in the other [mayoral] candidates [“City Hall Bucks,” WW, Feb. 1, 2012], but [Jefferson] Smith is getting the support of what look to be, y’know, regular people of Portland who don’t control much more than their vote and their tightened pocketbooks.

—“Torridjoe” Here’s an article I’d like to see: One that attempts to answer the question, “If government is for the people, and the people have the power, why are corporations and monied interests spending over a million dollars on [mayoral] candidates?”

In other words: What fools out there believe that local government is of, by and for the people?

Because I’ve got some used videotapes of Portlandia I’d like to sell you.

—“Power Mad”

[Eileen] Brady keeps trying to have it both ways [“Manual Dexterity,” WW, Feb. 1, 2012]. She says she co-founded New Seasons, but yet won’t take any responsibility for the anti-union decisions the company made. She’s developed a real habit of talking out of both sides of her mouth.

CRC, New Seasons, etc. I’m beginning to think she’s a real fraud.

—“Bill Stone”

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Every morning as the MAX doors open at Lloyd Center, I hear the sounds of opera. I think I know the thinking behind this, but could you please illuminate us on whether the strategy is working?

—Bill S.

to reduce loitering at station platforms,” says TriMet’s Mary Fetsch.

Apparently, classical music is considered so egregiously uncool by today’s youth (frankly, yesterday’s youth aren’t that hot on it, either) that a few bars of “Vesti la giubba” will scatter them like a cat does pigeons.

If you can ignore the classism of a practice that disperses people of color by blasting the soundtrack of the European aristocracy, the program does seem to work. The song list comprises just five selections, though, so it’s possible that simply repetition plays a role.

Either way, it’s pretty clever—maybe even foolproof. After all, how could any self-respecting hooligan possibly get up to any serious mischief with the strains of, say, Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony blaring in the background? I just can’t viddy it—can you, me droogs?

We all have our crosses to bear, Bill. Every morning I hear the buzzing of 10,000 bees forming the words, “When you kill again, the voices will stop, for a time,” but you don’t see me crying the blues about it. I just breathe a silent prayer to Jodie Foster and get on with my day.

But seriously, folks: What Bill has been hearing is the result of a pilot program TriMet began in 2010. Taking a cue from the London Underground transit system, TriMet has installed loudspeakers to play classical music at a few transit stops. Lloyd Center is the latest stop to get them.

A thoughtful gesture to expose us plebes to the finer things in life? Hardly. “The goal was 4

The article ignores the fact that New Seasons is but one of the many productive jobs she’s held.

Does she have business experience? Having known Eileen professionally, the answer for me is yes. She’s a strategic promoter and expert communicator. Portland could use more of that.

—“Wryly”

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Oregonians so far haven’t been big givers to Super PACs, the game-changing independent committees that—thanks to a 2010 U.S. Supreme Court decision— can raise and spend unlimited amounts of money to boost or attack a candidate. But Federal Election Commission records show one Southwest Portland resident, Joan Peters, gave $250 to the most famous Super PAC: Americans for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow, formed

by Comedy Central’s COLBERT Stephen Colbert. Colbert used his Super PAC to finance his satirical presidential bid in the South Carolina GOP primary. “It’s my way of being able to support democracy,” Peters, an unemployed nurse, tells WW. “I think it’s a powerful thing to do, through satire, to show what mockery is really happening—and how we’re being mocked by the regular campaigns.”

Portland police rushed to issue a press release Feb. 3 when vandals hit cars in the city’s Southwest neighborhoods and Lake Oswego. The Oregonian wrote at least three articles on the spree that left 100 cars with paint damage or broken windows; the paper quoted one Lake O resident decrying vandalism in his “nice neighborhood.” Our sympathies to those whose property was damaged, but maybe the emphasis is misplaced. A quick look at Portland police statistics shows that, in the 12 months ending in December, there were 369 reported incidents of vandalism in Southwest Portland—compared with 1,359 incidents in East Portland, none of which merited a police press release.

Families of two alleged hazing victims at Grant High School have accused KGW-TV Channel 8 of airing a bogus interview with a woman who posed as one of the victim’s relatives. As first reported on wweek.com, the families told school officials the anonymous woman wasn’t related to them and that she discussed phony details about the sexual nature of the alleged hazing. KGW—which kept her face shadowed— removed the video from the station’s website and hasn’t been able to confirm the woman’s story. News Director Rick Jacobs declined to comment on what happened.

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J O N AT H A N H I L L

NEWS

GRAVY TRAIN UNION PACIFIC HAS BILLIONS IN PROFITS. SO WHY IS OREGON SUBSIDIZING THE RAIL GIANT?

BY KA R A W I L B E C K

kwilbeck@wweek.com

When it comes to shipping companies, few are bigger than Union Pacific. The rail giant controls 32,000 miles of track across most of the Western U.S. Last year, the company had profits of $3.3 billion.

Union Pacific is perhaps the last company that needs a handout from the State of Oregon—especially when public budgets are being slashed.

But that has not stopped Oregon officials from giving $24.7 million in subsidies to Union Pacific since 2006—and another $12 million to railroad companies spending to fix track and facilities leased from Union Pacific.

Union Pacific has benefited from ConnectOregon, a lottery-funded program intended to help local governments and businesses that don’t have the money to complete vital transportation projects.

Aaron Hunt, a spokesman for Union Pacific’s western region, says the company simply has taken advantage of a subsidy Oregon makes available.

“We felt like this was an excellent opportunity to partner with the public,” Hunt says, adding Union Pacific has invested $500 million in Oregon since 2005.

“This is definitely a situation where the investments are meant to improve our ability to move freight,” he says. “Any time we’re operating efficiently, effectively and safely, that’s an opportunity to make a profit.”

In other words, smaller companies and ports go begging

while Union Pacific rolls off with millions in subsidies.

“If their tracks need repairs, it’s their job as a business, not ours as taxpayers, to fix them,” says Jody Wiser of Tax Fairness Oregon, a watchdog group. “We’re cutting programs because we don’t have enough money, but we’re giving grants away to private businesses.”

Union Pacific is lining up again. The Oregon Department of Transportation is preparing another round of ConnectOregon grants to be awarded later this year. The company is asking for another $8.2 million, records show.

The 2005 Legislature approved ConnectOregon to finance transportation projects that don’t include building roads and highways.

After three rounds of ConnectOregon awards, ports, transit agencies and cities have been given $295 million from ODOT. Requests for a lot more have gone unfilled.

Here’s how it works: The state borrows money by selling bonds, and gives away the cash to winning transportation projects. The state then uses lottery profits to pay down the debt on the bonds.

In 2010, in the last round of ConnectOregon grants, 80 projects bid for the money; about half got funded. Many grants went to airport projects, docks and transit agencies.

ODOT records reveal a potential for conflict of interest in the way the state hands out these millions.

Committees that rank the projects have included representatives of Union Pacific as well as other agencies and companies that have later walked home with some of the money. The representatives can’t vote on their own projects, but they do score others competing against them.

ODOT Director Matt Garrett, who appoints the selection committees, says he seeks a wide range of expertise among the members. “I look for all interests to inform the transportation debate,” Garrett says. “It’s a very transparent and accountable process.”

The state’s Transportation Commission gives final approval, Garrett says, but has always gone along with the selection committees’ funding recommendations. “We

have advanced projects that have benefited the state of Oregon,” Garrett says.

Chris Smith of the Portland Transport blog says he has qualms about public subsidies for private companies. But he says government programs at times should help private firms with their transportation projects.

“If you’re at the end of the rail spur and the track isn’t reliable, that influences your ability to do business,” Smith says. “The model is kind of screwed up, though.”

Recipients of lottery handouts have included other private rail companies as well. BNSF Railway, another major carrier, got a $7.2 million grant in 2008. Portland & Western Railroad has received $26.9 million in grants. (Portland & Western is owned by Connecticut-based Genesee & Wyoming Inc., a company far smaller than Union Pacific.)

The law that created ConnectOregon says the state should finance projects where agencies or businesses “lack capital and the technical capacity to undertake multimodal transportation projects.”

“It doesn’t sound like Union Pacific fits that description,” says Greg LeRoy, executive director of Good Jobs First, a Washington, D.C-based advocacy group that runs Corporate Subsidy Watch. “Many small businesses, including short-line railroads, lack access to capital that larger businesses might have. I hope the program’s not getting twisted.”

In 2010, the state gave Union Pacific $5 million to construct a bypass track at its Barnes Yard in Portland, and $5.2 million more for a new traffic-control system in Albany. That year, according to Securities and Exchange Commission filings, Union Pacific posted a net income of $2.8 billion, Union Pacific’s Hunt says the rail company—despite its large profits—won its subsidies fairly and that the investments create jobs in Oregon.

“These investments have a number of different ways they trickle down throughout the economy,” he says, “and we feel good about it.”

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

7

NEWS

POLITICS

BIG CHECKS AND BALANCES CHARLIE HALES LEANS ON BIG DONORS, AND A PORTLAND DEVELOPER PLAYS TWO SIDES.

BY H E I D I G R O OV E R

hgroover@wweek.com

Political candidates like to say every vote counts. When it comes to campaign contributions, some people clearly have a louder voice than others.

Last week, WW gave you an analysis of special-interest groups’ funding of the leading mayoral candidates’ campaigns.

But we noticed something else in the numbers: In a race that’s crossed the million-dollar line, about a quarter of the cash raised—$286,608—comes from people or companies giving $10,000 or more.

Former City Commissioner Charlie Hales is relying more on big donors than are businesswoman Eileen Brady and state Rep. Jefferson Smith—44 percent of Hales’ cash comes from people giving north of 10 grand.

And one prominent Portland developer is hedging its bets, giving big donations to more than one candidate.

EILEEN BRADY $35,508: The Catherine H. Rohter Living Trust, the estate of the mother of Brady’s husband, Brian Rohter. $20,000: Brady’s loans to her own campaign. $10,000: Stan Amy, a New Seasons Market founder. Christy Eugenis, Amy’s wife. TMT Development Co., the realestate company, founded by movietheater mogul Tom Moyer, behind Fox Tower and other downtown buildings.

Frank Foti, CEO of Vigor Industrial, a Portland-based ship-repair company.

FamilyCare Inc., a Medicare provider that could be affected by state healthcare reforms. (Brady sits on the Oregon Health Fund Board.) Steven McGeady, former Intel exec, now chairman of ShiftWise, maker of staffing software for health-care providers. PM Financial Services, a Tigard-based financial planning company.

JEFFERSON SMITH

CHARLIE HALES $25,000: David Nierenberg, owner of a Camas, Wash.-based investment group.

(The Hales campaign says Nierenberg is a friend from Hales and his wife’s book club.) Stacy and Witbeck Inc., a streetcar-development company.

$11,000: Megan Hull, a Washington, D.C., political consultant. $10,000: Susan Burmeister-Brown, editor of Glimmer Train Press.

$20,000: James Kelly, founder and CEO of Rejuvenation.

$6,000: Stephen Luczo, CEO of Cupertino, Calif.-based Seagate Technology. Curtis Thompson, a Portland physician.

$10,100: Candace Young, a Vancouver, Wash., psychologist. (Also a book club friend, the campaign says.)

$3,500: Kenneth Lewis, former executive with Lasco Shipping Co. (a Schnitzer family company).

$10,000: Hamilton Construction, which specializes in freeways and bridges. TMT Development Co. Yes, the same firm that gave to Brady.

Melvin Mark, chairman of Melvin Mark Cos., a commercial real-estate firm. Barbara Hall, Hales’ sister-inlaw. Albert Solheim, an investor at Portland-based AWS Real Estate. The Greenbrier Cos., owner of Gunderson, the Portland-based rail car and marine-barge maker.

Source: Oregon Elections Division, as of Feb. 7, 2012. Cash contributions only.

For the latest on the 2012 elections: wweek.com/pdxvotes.

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9

NEWS

TRANSPORTATION

STILL BIG, STILL COSTLY

CRC BACKERS CLAIM THE $3.5 BILLION PROJECT IS “DOWNSIZING.” THAT’S NOT TRUE—NOT EVEN CLOSE.

BY NIG E L JAQ UI SS

legislators denying the project was being downsized, citing erroneous news reports.

Hammond wrote that the project’s price tag would remain the same, but the project would be built in phases “when additional funds are available.”

The plan for the CRC has always called for phases. What’s different here is that state officials are trying to put a smaller price tag on the first phase, hoping legislators will commit to the project.

McCaig says the CRC team simply proposed a way to get the project started.

“That’s what we’ve done,” she said in an email to WW. “A phased approach with some improvements postponed to a second phase, when money becomes available.”

In other words, Oregon and Washington taxpayers would still ultimately pay for the same project on today’s drawing boards.

njaquiss@wweek.com

Backers of the proposed $3.5 billion freeway bridge across the Columbia River say they’ve gotten the message: The project is too big and expensive.

That’s why Gov. John Kitzhaber’s chief adviser on the Columbia River Crossing, Patricia McCaig, told legislators Jan. 19 the Interstate 5 project is being scaled down.

“We’ve clearly been directed by the governor, the public and conversations with you [lawmakers] to go for a smaller project,” said McCaig, who also serves as a paid consultant to the project’s top contractor.

The Oregonian called McCaig ’s proposal a “bombshell”: Eliminating freeway ramps would cut the price to $2.4 billion.

The headline: “Columbia River Crossing Officials Suggest Significant Downsizing.”

That message turns out not to be true.

On Jan. 20, Washington Department of Transportation Secretary Paula Hammond fired off a memo to Washington

The headlines gave CRC boosters a PR victory. But records show the project has not been transparent about another size issue: Just how wide is the bridge going to be?

Critics initially complained the proposed bridge was too wide, and that would encourage additional traffic, harm the environment, and drive up costs.

The CRC’s 2008 Draft Environmental

10’

ABC 123

six lanes or more.

Notably, another bridge project intended to carry about the same number of vehicles as the CRC won’t be nearly as wide.

Washington is refurbishing State Route 520 between Seattle and Redmond, a $4.65 billion project that includes a floating bridge over Lake Washington. The 520 bridge will carry nearly as much traffic as the CRC, but with fewer, narrower lanes.

Portland economist Joe Cortright says state officials pulled a bait-and-switch with the CRC: promising fewer lanes but failing to reduce the bridge’s lane capacity.

“If it’s just routine and prudent to have room for expansion, why didn’t they disclose the actual width of the structure?”

Cortright asks. “This was a conscious effort to edit out very fundamental information and hide the facts.”

The CRC’s Putney says the 520 and I-5 bridges aren’t comparable because state and federal highway standards are different. She says the CRC will carry more freight and, in turn, need wider lanes.

Cortright notes the 520 project, like the CRC, depends on federal funding and performs a nearly identical function. He says the CRC project’s legislative testimony last month—and shell games with bridge widths—are part of a pattern.

“The [Washington and Oregon] DOTs simply can’t be trusted,” Cortright says.

“They will say whatever they think the leaders want to hear, and then do exactly what they wanted to do all along.”

Impact Statement showed widths of 99 feet each for the northbound and southbound spans. (The CRC consists of two bridges, with the spans standing independently next to each other.)

The plan called for 12 lanes, six in each direction. Responding to critics, CRC officials said in 2010 that narrower spans could work.

The December 2011 Final Environmental Impact Statement portrayed the bridge with five-lane spans—if true, a potential savings of tens of millions of dollars.

But did the CRC make a meaningful change in the bridge’s size and capacity?

The final report contained hundreds of pages of granular detail—but left out the spans’ new widths.

“We just felt like it was too much detail,” says CRC spokeswoman Mandy Putney.

“There was no attempt to try to hide the width.”

Putney says the new spans’ widths range from 88 to 129 feet.

That means the bridge widths didn’t shrink significantly.

Critics wanted a narrower set of spans that truly reflected just enough room for five lanes. But an examination of the details shows there will still be plenty of room for ABC 123

ABC 123

11’

11’

12’

4’

Shoulder

Shoulder

CROSS SECTION OF SINGLE DIRECTION OF TWO NEW BRIDGES 48’ State Route 520 Bridge

ABC 123

10’

ABC 123

ABC 123

11’

Columbia River Crossing Bridge

11’

4’

12’

Shoulder

Shoulder

12’

Shoulder

ABC 123

ABC 123

12’

12’

Shoulder

12’

ABC 123

12’

14’

14’

88’

The new bridge between Seattle and Redmond will carry 115,000 vehicles per day. Source: Washington Department of Transportation

12’

12’

ABC 123

Shoulder

48’

ABC 123

ABC 123

ABC 123

ABC 123

12’

12’

The proposed CRC bridge is far wider than the 520 bridge and includes enough space for at least one more lane. It will carry 125,000 vehicles daily. Source: CRC

ABC 123

12’

ABC 123

14’

14’

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BOOMING BUSINESS: Sen. Brian Boquist’s military-training company indirectly benefits from contracting set-asides for Alaska native companies.

SENATOR OF FORTUNE A LAWSUIT LIFTS THE CURTAIN ON SEN. BRIAN BOQUIST’S MILITARY DEALS—AND HOW REPUBLICANS MAY BE BENEFITING.

BY CO R E Y P E I N

cpein@wweek.com

State Sen. Brian Boquist (R-Dallas) may be the most adventurous lawmaker in Salem.

He’s described his best-known business, International Charter Inc. of Oregon, as a humanitarian organization, ferrying relief supplies in war-torn countries from Liberia to Pakistan.

But journalistic accounts of ICI missions in West Africa in the late 1990s describe a paramilitary force of well-armed Russian and American veterans who serve as military proxies in areas deemed too dangerous for uniformed soldiers.

A federal lawsuit has raised new questions about how Boquist—a 53-year-old U.S. Army veteran—makes and spends his money.

In the complaint, first reported by wweek. com, a longtime Boquist business partner alleged Boquist and his wife, Peggy, misappropriated “thousands of dollars” from ICI Wyoming and funneled the money to Republican candidates and causes in Oregon.

Campaign finance records show Boquist and his wife have donated more than $64,000 to GOP candidates since 2008, either personally or through an ammunition company he owns.

Boquist declined to answer questions about the lawsuit; the plaintiff, Danny O’Brien, moved to withdraw the lawsuit Feb. 3, the day WW broke the story. In an email to WW, Boquist said he hadn’t seen the complaint and that federal rules limited what he could say.

Boquist was first elected to the Oregon House in 2004, after twice running unsuccessfully against then-U.S. Rep. Darlene Hooley (D-Ore.).

Apart from farming, ranching and timber interests in Oregon, Boquist has served as the U.S. agent of a Russian aviation firm that supplied ICI with helicopters and crews, and owns several ICI offshoots in Oregon, Alaska and Wyoming.

ICI Wyoming runs a military-training complex outside Cheyenne, where it conducts live

tactical exercises featuring rocket-propelled grenades, mortars and simulated truck bombs. The customer is a U.S. Marine Corps expeditionary force based at Camp Lejeune, N.C. Training is a sideline—and sometimes a cover—for many private military companies. In War Dog, a 2006 book on mercenaries by British journalist Al J. Venter, ICI’s O’Brien is pictured posing with villagers in Northern Pakistan on a U.S. State Department contract. O’Brien is quoted bragging of his Russian pilots’ “big balls” running “unauthorized cross-border missions.”

The book describes ICI as “Africa’s own Air America,” a reference to the Central Intelligence Agency’s notorious covert supply network in Southeast Asia during the Vietnam War. (Boquist’s résumé boasts a stint at Evergreen International Airlines before he founded ICI in 1993. Evergreen—a company with CIA ties, as documented by The Oregonian—purchased some of the Air America fleet.)

ICI Wyoming works as a subcontractor to Defense Training Systems, which is the trade name of ILSC Holdings LC, a subsidiary of Katmai Government Services. Katmai is itself wholly owned by Ouzinkie Native Corporation, which is headquartered in Ouzinkie, Alaska, population 200, on an island in the Kodiak archipelago.

Through ILSC, Boquist’s company benefits from a lucrative loophole in U.S. contracting rules. Congress created special benefits for Alaska native corporations in a 1971 law, making them eligible for no-bid, sole-source government contracts.

A 2010 series in The Washington Post exposed how most of the $29 billion in contracts awarded to Alaska native corporations over the past decade benefited not impoverished tribal shareholders but well-connected white insiders.

Federal records show that ILSC, which hired Boquist’s company, has received $156 million in Defense Department contracts since 2000.

In an email to WW, Katmai CEO Dave Stephens stressed the company’s compliance with federal rules restricting lobbying and political donations by defense contractors.

Stephens says Katmai has “no knowledge of the alleged use of ICI funds by Mr. Boquist.”

The lawsuit against Boquist valued ICI’s subcontracts at $2 million a year, and claims ICI Wyoming paid “income and dividends” to shareholders in 2010 in excess of $1 million.

If Brian and Peggy Boquist are 45-percent owners of ICI Wyoming, as the lawsuit says, then their profit would have totaled, since the contract began in 2007, an estimated $1.8 million.

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2328 NW Westover Road

Abner Jay My witness is the empty bowl and the warm lap, you love all, not just the kibble.

Aiden McDougal Everything is perfect about you, except when you eat the garbage (such a small price to pay for unconditional love).

Love, Your mommas Annabelle To the dog that is always licking her butt, eating the turkey from the grocery bag before we catch you, and keeping us up at night with your incessant whimpering...Happy Valentine’s day. You forever complete our family. Josh and Jenni Apollo and Orion mew meow maw. kitties, oh kitties. thanks for letting us buy the house so you could run it. we enjoy being your bitches. that is all. meow.

Arthur You make my dreams come true. Especially when I dream about being nipped in the middle of the night, or cuddling with you as you purr. I forgive all the sickness. Meow!

SPECIAL VALENTINES: POOCH POETRY, CAT CHAT, AND WARM WISHES FOR GOLDFISHES.

MORGAN GREEN-HOPKINS

Love and ink create a potent alloy. Shaw Flick’s chest testifies to that. The 29-year-old Portland man is tattooed with a nearly life-size portrait of his dog, Scurvy.

Make that Flick’s ex-dog—or ex’s dog.

Flick and his then-girlfriend adopted the cairn terrierpoodle puppy from the Oregon Humane Society six years ago.

The pooch was a big part of their lives, serving as ring bearer at their 2008 wedding, led down the aisle by the best man.

“He’s very sweet and energetic, and what I miss the most about him is how he would curl up with me at night and nuzzle his face into me or rest his chin on my leg,” Flick says.

Things didn’t work out. The marriage asunder, Scurvy lives in New York with Flick’s ex and her boyfriend. Flick let his ex take the dog, but he did ask her to pay for the tattoo, which was inked in six hours during the couple’s separation.

“I had a talk with Scurvy about how this other guy was not his father, and apparently he’s taken that to heart,” Flick says. “My ex sends me pictures and videos of the dog, and from what I can gather he appears to miss me. That’s what I’d like to believe, anyway.”

As ink goes, newsprint is much more fleeting than a tattoo. But not necessarily any less heartfelt, as you’ll find in these pages. Willamette Week asked readers to pen valentines to their pets, and they responded in droves. Among them you’ll find a note from Flick, too.

“It’s just like, ‘I love you, I miss you, come back to Portland,’” he says. “I don’t necessarily think of the loss or life without him as much as I think about how things were when we were together.”

Someday, Flick says, he may love again. But not yet.

“I like animal companionship,” he says. “But I don’t like the idea of replacing him, because he’s a pretty special guy.”

BABY (the cat)!

Twelve years of purrfect love!

Your squeaks, nudges, & purrs have added fullness to my life that can never be duplicated.

Chloe thanks you for being the best fur buddy in the world!

Bagherra I love you my furry needy princess. Even when I’m in bed & you notice I’m awake so you meow and walk all over me till I get up. Not that you’re hungry or want to play, just to have me up. But, I’m glad you flew with me here from Florida.

Bailey I love you for distributing the contents of the kitchen garbage bags into more manageable collections on the living room carpet. How thoughtful of you to help redecorate!

Bama Bama Rama Little Boy Blue, I Love You! Becky & Brian How to express the happiness our Chinese cats give us daily. After many tests, pokes and probes, an 18-hour-plus plane ride (with 3 transfers), their own passports…so happy to be in Oregon. Trees, grass, clean air and water, birds, squirrels AND mice! Happy Day you two, happy every day. Love you much, G and G. Beija Georges I love you the most, my magical Ouija-Mon Teddy Spaghetti.

Thank you 4 being a teen corgi/ sharpei dream. I love you so much more than your sister Wishbone. But I still won’t take u to see Katy Perry. xoxoxo Nicole Belle Some say I rescued you from that shelter but I realize now that it was you who rescued me.

Benny My dearest kitty cat Benny, you filled my heart with joy again after I lost of my dog of 15 years, Toby, to brain cancer this year. I love how you come to your name to be snuggled and loved. I love how you cry when you are separated from me. In many ways, you are more dog than cat. So please stop peeing on the bed or my boyfriend will give you away.

SHAW FLICK

CONT. on page 16 Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

15

Billy My dearest, most handsome Billy-Poof...you are my little life partner and my best friend. I’ve loved the last 10+ years we’ve spent together and am so happy you trusted me enough to let me bring you in off the cold stinky streets back in B.C. I love you so much! You are my Valentine, sweet Bill. Thanks for being awesome. Love always, your Daddy Binca LaRue Lover of everything and everyone who knew her, has passed on. She is sorely missed this St. Valentine’s Day. Rest in peace, my little Rue. Blanche and Dorothy To our golden girls Who says your valentine has to be human. You love us unconditionally and bring happiness to our lives every day. So, this valentine is for our two adorable dachshunds, Blanche and Dorothy...will you be our valentine? -S&B Blue Bowen As soon as we locked eyes at the animal shelter, I knew we were to become inseparable.

I don’t mind that you ate my favorite hat, and always steal and hide my socks. You are my best friend, and I love you so much. Thank you for being part of our family.

Love your mum.

Bob We are so lucky someone decided they didn’t want you anymore—their loss is our big win. You filled that hole in our heart that was left when we lost Jake in November. We love you more than chocolate, candy and flowers, and hope that you love us more than bones, tennis balls and trips to the park too!

Boofers Mr. B - wonderful combination of tough and sweet - attacking a prowler - guarding our baby grandchildren - always ready to play - credit to all German Sheps - many thanks - fondly remembered Bruce The whole dog world can just shut it down—you’ve got this.

Love, Zeke, Quimby, Patience, Rhoda, Bunt, The Swede, and all your friends at WW. Bud How do I let you know how much I love you? It’s only been a short time we’ve been together, just think of all the fun adventures we have in our future. Here’s to us you old lucky guy!

Bud Pardo Epstein “Ode to Bud” Oh, Little Man Hungry all the time Still spazzing at the mailman Like you did in your prime Coat like milk chocolate Paws, frosted white Eyes, golden caramels Such a sweet delight You came from mean streets But us? Meant to be Now we both know YOU rescued ME Buddha You’ve been my buddy for over 10 years. You sit on my chest and claw my beard when I’m sleepy, you wait patiently for me to work through my hangover before I feed you in the morning. You love the ladies as much as me. You are the best tabby cat ever.

Bunny Since we met, you’ve bravely weathered countless shitstorms by my side. Your hopeful eyes

16

staring into mine, the sole reason I got back up and struggled to make a better life for us when I wanted to curl up and die. You have my heart for eternity. Love, Mama.

crazy but we still love her. I love you to pieces, Coco.

Coco To our lovely little Coconut. You are a bright, shining light and we are so lucky to have you...

Who rescued who?

Buster Nutts Brown You are the fastest wiener dog in PTown, you’re so fast you even ran away from the pound and into my life, turning my frown upside down, and that’s why you’re my Buster Nutts Brown! Happy Birthday and Valentine’s Day to the biggest and fastest Wiener Dog around, and I’ll always be picking your poop up off of the ground!

Calvin Oh the places you did go. la new york tokyo. escaping on planes gave you a rush. coast to coast the vets’ biggest pet crush. we all miss your charming fuzzy ways. and think of you fondly every day. meow.

BLANCHE AND DOROTHY

Dame Isabella Donna deBlanco (Bella) I am a Wiccan, and as such believe in familiars. My Bella is my familiar—a part of my soul left behind in heaven to rejoin me in animal form to make this life more tolerable. I love her so much and cannot fathom a day when she won’t be by my side.

Cash (puppy) and Ebi (kitty) Mom and Dad love you kids. We pick up your poo and give you crunchy food to your heart’s desire!

Hugs and Kisses, Mom and Dad Charlie OMG! Your perfectly adorable face and head tilt! COME CUDDLE WITH ME! Charlie Even though you are no longer with us. You will forever be in our hearts. We all miss you especially your cat friend Linus.

Thanks for a wonderful 12 years.

Love, Mom & Dad

BRUCE

CHARLIE

DAME ISABELLA DONNA DEBLANCO (BELLA)

Coco My little poofball with all your fur, you are a little pupcake.

When the snow falls down you get little snow balls in your hair it is so cute. You only weigh 3 pounds and you are full grown.

I love your personality. You make our family laugh, and you make are family complete from your admirer, ???

Coco You are the best puppy the best in the world. Coco ,you are a little pupcake. I love you so, so, so, much. You are very cute and silly. The first time I laid eyes on you I knew you were perfect. Sometimes Coco is

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

Darby and June Bug What zany antics you bring into our home. You both are as crazy as Icarus who flew to close to the sun. Why fly when you can calmly clomp clomp your paws and not make us so dizzy. Pretty soon this entire partnership will progress into a treasure of memory and togetherness. Ant & Bee. Darwin You are the #1 dog.

You were twice as big and a lot more bitey than we thought you’d be when we adopted you.

Now that you know we won’t abandon you or hurt you, you’re the sweetest and most loyal and intelligent pal anyone could ever ask for.

Chewie Lee Our eyes first met 6 years ago, the saddest looking girl in the pound.

We’ve laughed, cried, sang, napped...and napped more You’re the best bitch ever, til death do us part And even though you’re old and grey, you always have the key to my heart Chloe (the dog)!

Thanks for all the licks & hugs over the years! You’ve added more love in my life that I didn’t know was possible. You’re the best frisbee catcher this side of the Mississippi! furBaby loves your companionship 4ever!!!

Danci When you joined our family, we thought about changing your name, but we soon realized that you are so a Danci with an “i” and over that i is a heart instead of a dot. We heart you bigtime! The Hasan Family Dandy Lion You are the best cat on the face of the planet. I can never say no to your big fluffy kittycat face.

My door will always be open to you when you want pets. You are my neighbor’s cat, but you have a warm place in my heart.

I love you, Dandles.

Chester and Chance You claw up my roommate’s stuff. You eat my headphones.

You vomit on my bed at 5 AM. I scoop your poop...yet, I still let you live here. If that doesn’t say I love you, perhaps this ad will.

I love you.

Chewie Hunter of bed mice, white feathers, and everything that moves. I love it when you get The Darts, the Scootsies, and the Rollsies. I love the way you demand food and all your “help” folding laundry. You’re the cutest cat in the world! I chews you! Love, Sara

Coco I love that you know just when to wake me up, by scratching incessantly at my bedside.

I love your love of crumpled TriMet tickets, and your ability to play fetch for hours on end with them as you launch yourself down the stairs and return with your prize.

I love your soft, soft fur, and your attention to detail at bath time.

I love your sweet, little, wet nose.

And your 3 extra toes.

I’ll love you ’til the end of time.

Please, please, please stay mine!

XO

DOOLEY

David To the only man whose never let me down, We’ve been through a lot together: 9 moves, 3 states, 2 coasts, 2 ex-boyfriends, 2 hospital stays, hell, you’ve even done time at the pound. Twice.

Through it all it’s always been us. At 18 years you’re my longest (healthy) relationship.

Anyone who knows me has to go through you first. We’re a package deal, always have been and always will be. What gets me through most things is knowing that no matter what, I have to do right by you. I almost lost you this year and it was scary. Some people called it a Christmas miracle. I call it modern veterinary science and $1,000. But then again, knowing what you mean to me, what we mean to each other, maybe someone or something new that I’m not strong enough to be without you. Not yet. I love you...even though you always come between my boyfriend and me...literally...every night.

Egyptians believed that cats serve as the temporary resting

place for human souls. That must be true. You are a crotchety, dirty old man. My valentine, my cat David.

Deano You are not just my best friend, but my family and I am so glad I rescued you because we needed each other.

You are such a good boy, Stinky, and the best hound around.

I love how excited you are to see me after work and our trips to the dog park.

I love how you snuggle with me when I am down and I love when you get your fox and run around the house.

I couldn’t have asked for a better dog.

Happy Valentine’s Day. Dexter and Willy You cuddle with the best of ’em. You’re little...tiny even. You both know how to throw your own toys for solo entertainment and you’re ridiculously cute. Because of this, I will look past the accidents, farting, and eating of cords, socks, headphones and bras.

Love you furever (GET IT?!).

Dolores The man who was selling you asked me, “Do you want a mean one, or a nice one?” (Southern accent) Although you constantly have goopy eyes and scabs all over you, I’m glad I picked you that fateful morning.

I wouldn’t want anyone else to take up half the bed...and well, no one else ever will. Thanks for being there sweet D and for living up to my choice of a “mean” kitty. Your tiny head is one that only I could love.

Dooley I know love shouldn’t hurt, but sometimes I love you so much that it does. The amount of time I spend thinking about you might disturb some people, but I’m certain you’re the embodiment of unconditional love. You are the Dooley Lama.

Eddie Your bad breath, your stinky bum, I love both, but they make some run. Your snaggletoothed grin, your yappy bark, let me know I’m safe in the dark. The scale says 6 lbs., your brave heart says 60, conquering any fear and adventure with me. I love you Eddie!

Elba You came and you made us so happy, now we love you so much, it’s sappy. You have such a sweet little noggin, you are my Valentine’s Day doggin.

Emi Your late-night sprints down the hallway, high-pitched squeals followed by a quick spin to seize your tail and silly puppy smiles ignite many giggles; your snuggles spark great warmth; and your precious essence continually opens my heart.

Fergie Davis Feisty, funny, smart & well-read, she hails from Amish Country, our little redhead, give her commands she turns the other cheek, kisses she supplies every day of the week! Thank you red-haired devil for all that you do on V-Day & beyond, we will eternally love you!

Finn I love your squishy little Persian face & how you snort & snore.

I love that you sit next to me for dinner & eat my maple syrup. I love that you stand on one leg, like a pirate, when you use your litter box. That really makes me laugh.

Flesh I love every ounce of you. All 272 ounces. Forever and ever.

Please get off my chest.

Frankie Roses are red, violets are blue.

Even when you poop in the corner, I still love you and want to snuggle.

Frankie?!

Snort snort sniff sneeze. Sneeze sneeze sniff hump. Head-tilt.

Sneeze sniff. Burp fart sneeze, head-tilt.

Sniff sneeze fart, Love, Dad Gordon Roses are red Violets are blue My best friend is orange With a heart of gold so true!

Guido aka Burrito I saved you from a trailer park, starvation, and my creeper ex that tried to steal you. You saved me from myself. I vow to hide your pills in tasty treats and supply you with a plethora of toys. Who’s the best boy?

That’s right, it’s you.

Hamster Igor I send my highest regards and blessings from under the rose bush. Unfortunately I have passed on and am awaiting the apocalypse to return as a zombie. Please know that your new family will treat you with nothing but respect and kindness. Enjoy my wheel.

-Hamster Shiva Hannah You are a ray of sunshine!

Thank you for brightening every day with your sassiness and loving spirit!

Henry & Sunny Oh little schnuggies, we love you so! We love to watch you play and grow. In our hearts you’ll always be, soft and snuggly and cute as two peas!

Holden You are my friend, you are my kid, I love you despite the carpet stain that you did.

I’m so proud of how well you were reared, I don’t like puns, because they make me feel weird, But, Holden, you’re the Valentine I want to be “holden.”

Ivy Even though you are not my dog, I love you. You, with your sass and your small-dog swag.

No other Westie has been able to capture not only my heart, but my soul like you have. We are sisters, Iv. Sisters forever!

Jack Jensen Without you I would not know the smell of kitty poop as well as I do. Without you, I would not know what a hair-free toothbrush would taste like. Because of you, my life is filled with laughter and joy. Happy valentine’s day to my stinky boy.

Jasmine Puppy J, This year marks out 10th year together (or thereabouts). Thank you for being such a great dog. You make every day better. I love you, pups.

Jeremiah Weed To my sweet fish face, you light up my world.

I couldn’t ask for a better fish To come home to each day.

Thank you for being a great Listener. You read my energy.

It is true. I love you.

-Sam Jordin Happy Valentine’s day to the cutest, most loving puppy ever!

Love, Mommy

It’s the one with the grin That brings bacon home again!

PetLove Valentines they win

Killa Finnagen Remember when you attacked the neighbor for climbing in our window, or when you bit the rude vet, the way you sleep in front of the bedroom door to ward off evildoers? We love the way you run to the door when we come home, the way you prove your loyalty by viciously attacking everyone but us.

Thank you for being the best guard dog a cat could ever be.

Kitsu Since the day I adopted you, you have brought me much happiness and given me insane amounts of love. You’re the best dog a girl could ask for and I love you (even if you fart like a beast).

Loki You stretchy-paw my face to get me to pet you and are a general furry nuisance. You’re lucky you’re so cute and helpless, because at 5 am every day, I am tempted to let the raccoon in our yard have you as his dinner instead of feeding you your breakfast.

Lola, the bulldog (nickname Loles) It’s Valentine’s Day Lola, my girl You’re such a good laugh...

The best dog in the world

HOLDEN

Kitty I love you more than you love wet food. Thank you for always greeting me belly up at the door, no matter how bad of a day I’ve had it always makes me smile. Let’s play paw-paw and be BFFs forever!

No denying it, Loles You’ve stolen my heart In spite of the drool And frequent farts Lucy My love for you is so great that I don’t even care if you poop in the house. Now in your golden years, know without a doubt that Mommy will go into debt keeping you alive. My Heart Will Always Belong To You, Mommy

Lake You are my Sancho, my Watson, my Tonto, my Robin, my Silent Bob, my Gabrielle, my Garth, my Ethel, my Vanna, my Garfunkel, my Willow, my Weasley, my Costanza, my Al Gore, my Hobbes, my Samwise, and my Chewbacca. Thanks Leni Just over a year ago, you came into our home and our hearts.

You helped us heal old wounds, gave us unconditional love and made us laugh more than once.

We love you more than words can say, Little Monster!

Liberty You came into my life as a rescue dog...tiny...only 6 weeks old, but so full of life! Amber, Veda and Tucker became your Moms and Dad. From day one you tried to “hang” with the big kids and often got tired... now you are all grown and can hang with the gang. I love you for being part of my family... for introducing me to other people through dock jumping... for being my little furball that could!!!! —your Mom Silvia Lil’ G I love you even though you smell like ass.

KILLA FINNAGEN

LENI

LUCY SPOTTED TONGUE BURN STRONG

Lily and Jake I regret to inform you that after ten years of trying, both of you have repeatedly failed to qualify for the Mensa Cat Society of America. But since you’ve cuddled with me through 8 breakups and cancer, and haven’t pooped on the floor yet, I’ll keep you.

Linus and Indiana Bones “Mirror mirror on the wall Who’s the sweetest Valentine of All?” Linus is so cute He is a bit aloof While with Indiana Bones You’ll find Trouble is his “jones,” So when the verdict’s in

Lucy It’s hard to believe it’s been two years since we busted you out. We promise to protect you from the vacuum cleaner and Carolina Kitty if you keep up your vigilance against kids on skateboards and guys with hats.

Happy Valentine’s Day to our favorite rascally terrier!

Lucy Spotted Tongue Burn Strong Our memory of life before you has vanished; likely because we can’t imagine life without you, sweet girl. Your bear and skunk parents are thankful beyond words. Thank you for crossing over into the human realm and injecting your canine joy and unconditional love into every day.

Lilly Though more sour than sweet you are, you have been my loveliest pet by far. Never have I met a feline with such sass in her glare, and because of that glare I know you don’t care but...Happy Valentine’s Day anyway!

Lily My little one, baby bear, kookie monster, cuddle fish, sweetie pie, springer spaniel/border collie, wagger wag cakes, little face, dogs with jobs...You make PDX worth living! Happy Valentine’s Day to you and all the little ones in the world!

-Mama bear

So today, let’s wrestle And play Tug O’ War We’ll snuggle and hug Between naps and snores

Luke To my pup, I woke up this morning and what did I see?

A wrinkled up Pug face Just staring at me!

She had big black eyes And a short little nose.

Soft velvet ears folded up like a rose.

Just inches away She gave a big wheeze, Sucked in some air, Let out a giant sneeze!

A joy? A pleasure? A thrill?

It IS not!

To be waked in the morning By a spray of Pug snot!

-Author Unknown Luke and Doug Even though you sometimes look like a creepy clown, and even though you throw up every time you get in the car, I still love you. You’re the best monsters a gal could ever ask for.

Love, Caity Luna Please, pretty please with salmon and bacon on top, please be my Valentine. I love watching you eat, play and sleep. You are so perfectly furry and I don’t care that your breath sometimes smells like your bottom. You are the pup for me.

Love, Dan

MADELINE HAYES

Madeline (Maddy) I could never express how much I love you so I just shower you with affection and cuddles instead. You bring me endless joy and amusement. People tell me all the time what I already

know, and that is you are the cutest and sweetest pug ever.

Madeline Hayes Just like all pretty girls, you are batshit crazy, I have no idea why you are so obsessed with my socks, but I can’t quit you, and if I was still in high school, I would take you to the prom!

Love, Dad Maeby You’re a pug. your eye popped out that one time, but it’s back in now. good dog! stop eating my phone and stuff and i will love you more. love = give you cookies. since that’s all you care about. pugs.

Mango Nobody believes I have an interactive fish until they meet you. Then they meet you and want to know where to get one, but there is no encore with a Puffer like you. Thank you for letting me pet your fishskin, and for listening so skillfully. I simply love you Markie My little Weenie: I love you for inspiring me every day to be more free-spirited like you when you pee on Mike’s bathmat without a care in the world.

I should call you the Honey Badger of my heart.

Marley Mar Mar! Our little girl! We love you so very much. Even though you’re a therapy dog dropout... you’re a therapy dog for the family. Always by our side no matter what. You always know how to make us feel better. P.S. Grandma & Grandpa say you’re better than grandchildren!

Love-Your Pet Parents (Mitzie & Jeremy) Marleyboy Marleybarley-o my mister baby boy You are the Marfield I’ve always wanted I love you!

Little shitter!

MarthaBears Intoxicating white fur, and everywhere we go, people get jealous.

They do not understand my endless love for you.

They fail to go beyond the cuteness factor.

You are often confused for a bear, or dog.

The truth is, you are my shield, which protects me from a broken heart.

Max You weenie, you’ve always been a manipulative little rat to all that have known you, but sometimes you let your more charming doxie side show.

Seeing as you are pushing 17, we won’t have you much longer, so wanted to let you know we love ya.

Max I don’t know how anyone could abandon a senior dog, let alone your sweet face. Though you look like Yoda and an Ewok had a baby, and are missing teeth, I love you. I’m glad you were my foster dog failure.

Meadow Named for trouble, and well deserved—tougher than your brothers—you funny—OK, sleep on our heads.

CONT. on page 19

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

17

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Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

Mew You are my soul mate, my best friend, my little shadow.

Playing fetch with your vibrant feline self is unparalleled.

Thanks for adopting me; I’d be lost without you, babycat.

Mickey Rourke You’ve come such a long way in the last 2 years. You’re almost a real dog, even if you do take cues from the cat. Your unbridled joy at my mere presence lets me know you love me too.

You are proof that rescued pets are the best.

Milo & Lola You were my yin & yang, my two halves, and I learned so much about life and love from you both. Thank you for travelling through life with me. I am a better person for having known you.

Love, Jessica (mom) Mino Mino cat black and white purrbox pouncing, stalking, cuddling, Birdwatching, tail twitching my big-mouth furry baby Mishka and Sasha My furry Valentines, We love you even when you’re shedding We love you even when you disobey We love you even when you’re naughty Because you brighten our life, every day Love, Mama and Papa Mochi MoMo...how cute are you? Even after you poo on the carpet we’re still luv struck. If only people would stop asking if you were named after the damn ice cream—your name is short for Kakimochi and don’t you forget it!

You’re the best cat...we mean dog, ever.

Monty Me and you, just us two...and lots of your poo.

Moose I love Moose He likes bicycles and popsicles Mr. Sinister A feline angel was sent to Earth, On the day of Sin’s birth.

Black, white, full of joy.

I mew he was my special boy.

My puss is made of fur, meows and drool, Of cat poop, whiskers and supercool.

Although he may be low on smart, He’s never slow to steal your heart.

Mr. Smash How do I love thee?

Let me count the ways....

-3 loaves of Ken’s Artisan Bakery bread stolen off the kitchen table....8.97 -1 pair of Lucky slingback sandals reduced to shreds....59.99 -12 pairs of panties, eaten whole (and exited whole:)....108.00 -My love for Mr. Smash.....priceless.

Murphy I’m allergic to you, but I love your indifference towards me. Meow.

Murphy Ever since 9/11/2001 you have been in our life. You brought us comfort on that day, and hope for the future. And ever since then, you have always been there for us. You comfort all of us. You are the sweetest cat ever. You are my best friend.

most of my office. Little did I know how happy you’d make me when I first picked you up as a wee pile of forehead and eyes. XOXO

Murphy MURPHY MY PET You are the greatest Love of my life So much better with you in itThat’s why you get to sleep with me!

Love Mama Neko You are the prettiest girl in the world. My heart bursts into a million tiny slivers of joy every time I see you.

I want to spend every second of my day with you, because you are perfect!

Love, Dad Pablo Ever since you came into my life two years ago and vomited on my carpet, I knew I would love you forever. I still think you’re the prettiest Siamese cat I’ve ever seen.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Love, Mama Addie

MOCHI

Paige I always wished I had a cat and here you are. You are the best cat that I know! You always jump up when I pet you. You are really funny ’cuz most cats don’t drink out of the sink. I really LOVE you Paige! <3 Pancho & Lefty My golden boy Pancho, you’re so soft and sweet, and Lefty my love, you sure know how to sleep, Pancho, you could be in Doggie GQ. Lefty, there is an award for the bravery you exude.

Will you be my sweet hounds for Valentine’s Day, and every day after?

MR. SINISTER

PO

Pepper You are my darling chunky ball of fur. I used to abhor cats before I met you—now I couldn’t imagine my life without you. You changed my life—love you!

Percy @ Val To my two romantic “Percevals,” whose gentle quest wafts through each day as sweetest birdsong, recalling for us all that love is all there is.

Pomme Hey chubby-bunny, maybe you should take a note from your fellow kitty companion and go chase squirrels to help work off that big-round-ball-of-fur thing you’ve got going on. I guess it wasn’t fair that I named you after a round fruit...okay fine, here’s some more Fancy Feast.

Precious, Shadow, and my sweet rescues, My beloved fur children, you have enriched my life in ways you’ll never know. You are always excited to see me, and give me so much love. You all know that you were rescued from hell, and are now loving your new lives full of walks, play time, friends, good food, treats, and unlimited hugs and kisses! I will always love you!

Professor (Charles) X. Oh little Poof, my ball of fluff, Whose cuddles I can’t get enough.

The intoxicating smell of your fur, I long to hear your gentle purrrr.

PROFESSOR (CHARLES) X

Phany You are my soul mate, my best friend and more loving than any Valentine. Better than all the chocolate in the world! Thank you for your being with me. You are Phantastic. Love, Pidge

I dream of serving you canary, As I clean your dingleberries.

Others always stop and swoon, but You let them know, you’re my Maine Coon.

Q You taught me how to love unconditionally. But please stop destroying the red velvet chair.

Phinneaous Stinkerton Donkey bunny, gopher mole, jackalope—though most people don’t know what the hell you are, you are my mine. Only true love can see past the jokes about your bowl-shaped butt and the stench of your rodentness, and I, my dear, truly do love all 20 pounds of you.

Piper P Jones You rascally, beautiful creature!

You eat better than I do, and

Poe Poesy Doesy, oh how I’ve come to love chapsticks never had as much fun nor have I. You’ve been the little love cuddler Jamie has always needed. Thank you for coming into our lives and shining your light.

I Love You. Little DunkerTrunks!

Pokey Pokey My Little Puppy...I miss you so much. You were the best doggy ever!! I will always love you!!

Peanut I thought you name was cute, since I’m allergic to peanuts.

So I adopted you. Then I found out that you also have food allergies. Buying that expensive grain-free, dairy-free, fishfree food is not so cute. But it’s worth it, because we were obviously made for each other.

Pema, Mitts, Butters, Smokey Happy Valentine’s day to my amazing cats, dog and snake.

You all bring me a lot of love and warmth (literally, because the heater in my apartment sucks) and joy. Stewie, you are probably wondering why your name was left out—well, you are a mean dog. Maybe next year. I only have enough love to go around for 4. Okay...I kind of like you sometimes. —Elizabeth

Po We adopted you, and you were a problem immediately. The first three months were a constant battle of finding ways to keep you from wrecking the place up. You got your fluffy hair everywhere. Over time it got easier though, and you became one of the most goofy, adorable friends we have ever had. You loved having your armpits scratched, you would let us pick you up under the arms and make you dance, and you’d greet us in the morning with headbutts to the nose.

Watching you get sick was awful, and I’m so sorry for all the medication and needles, but at least you got to see the Christmas lights before you went. You’ve been gone for over a month now, but we still think about you and miss you every day. You were a constant friend in difficult times, and we love you dearly even though you’re gone. Thank you for making us so happy, Poseph.

SANDY BLYTH-GALLEGOS

Razzie Doodle 13 years together, your love and loyalty always there.

Our time together has gone so quickly.

Your eyes have gone dark, but you still lead the way on our walks Together until the end of our time, you are the best my 4-legged Valentine.

Reign Haiku For Reign Sixteen years ago My life changed for the better You are my best friend Rice & Pope Leo From the pound you both did arrive.

Our love for you none can contrive.

We’ll bribe you with nummies To fill up your tummies If you’ll just let us sleep past five.

Riley Muddy paw prints in my kitchen. Dog slobber dripping down the walls. Warm paw in my hand. Cold, wet nose in my cleavage. Web cam to track your every move while I’m at work. No, you don’t need a restraining order. I just love you, dammit. A lot.

Rin Tin Tin Though I only saw you on T.V. you were always the best dog to me Bet you could even beat up Lassie.

Roscoe, Shadow & Luke You’re a bunch of unruly bastards and you drive me crazy, but yet I can’t imagine my life without you mutts. I love you guys to death and you know I’d do anything for you. <3 -Mommy Leah Rosie and Skye For my furry loves, every day since you’ve been missing, a little bit more of my heart dies.

I will never stop searching for you. I only hope that whoever has you loves you at least half as much as I did. 15 years together will never be long enough.

Roy You have crazy food allergies, got a thorn stuck in your eye, pick fights with cats and sometimes peed on me. Luckily, you have more character than most people can only dream of.

Cancer can go fuck off, ’cause I want you to stay with me forever!

Ruby the Cat Even though you pee on our shoes, laundry and furniture, you’re still the coolest cat around. Love ya, McKenzie and Scott Sammy Dearest Sambolino - You’re the best black cat I’ve ever met and I’m glad I brought you in from your life on the streets.

Despite the shredded blinds, ripped leather chair and surprise piles of puke, I love you, fangs and all.

Sandy Blyth-Gallegos To the love of my life: You have shown me “Beauty without Vanity, Strength without Insolence, Courage without Ferocity, and all the Virtues of Man, without his Vices.” You may have come to me as a rescue, but truly it was you who saved me.

Sashas You call me your ah ah What ever that means to you?

You sing to me with such a beautiful voice.

Sometimes I wonder what your really saying?

The way you bap your tail in my face.

I can not help but laugh!

You will always have a piece of me my dear sweet little one!

Happy Valentine Day.

CONT. on page 21

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Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

Satchmo Thank you for coming into my life when I needed you the most. Your hearty purr and porcine body is always there when I’m sad, sick, or just need extra attention. You are my best buddy.

Scurvy The six painful hours tattooing your face on my ribs will never compare to the hurt of living without you. I thought things would be fine, but your move to New York in fact fucking destroyed me. Come home, and I promise I’ll love you and play with you forever.

Shadow My little man moves like a fox—and with a stick and a long string he will chase my socks!

He is my little black cat named Shadow, and without him I would be lost.

Shiloh Everyone says that you are lucky to have me, since you are brain damaged, can’t walk, and have seizures. But I am the lucky one to have you in my life for 8 years. Will you be my feline valentine?

Love, Colleen Simon the Bengal Cat When I look into your turquoise eyes, It’s like gazing into heaven. Your sweet and spunky personality fills my heart with such joy. I find myself staring uncontrollably at you all the time; your beauty is like candy.

Your physique and coat are so sleek and majestic, you’re sexy.

Simone and Billy Ray To my kids, as my disability gets worse, thank you for your love, comfort, and humor, and for giving me a reason to get out of bed, even if it takes me thirty minutes to do so. It’s tuna for you two tonight.

Smooches You’ve saved my life and have taught me how to love. You were half dead when we found you, but I’d like to think that you rescued me. Keep being loud and skittish! Here is hope to many more years teamed together. Love you Monkey.

Smudge I always have had a thing for black girls, and you are no different my nubian queen!

Happy Valentine’s day to my youngest daughter, you are the apple of my eye.

Love, Dad Sniffles HI SNIFFLES HOW YOU BEEZ? YOU BEEZ FAT YOU BEEZ FLUFFY YOU BEEZ CUTE and you beez loved by me.

—Chrissy Sophie You sound like Chewbacca and give high-fives like a boss. Our snuggle parties are never-ending, and I want to smash your face with daily lovies. Will you be mine 4eva?

Love, your besties, Nicolle & Jon Sparkle When I adopted you I thought I was rescuing you. Coming home to you instead of the bar saved my health and career. Knowing my heart wasn’t beating alone in the night soothed me. Your funny fuzzy face melted my heart. I realize now it was you that rescued me.

Spot Felis catus is your taxonomic nomenclature, An endothermic quadruped, carnivorous by nature;

Your visual, olfactory, and auditory senses Contribute to your hunting skills and natural defenses.

thing. Luckily, there’s no one else with better comedic timing and life-coaching skills whose butt fluff I’d rather trim. Happy V-Day, life partner!

I find myself intrigued by your subvocal oscillations, A singular development of cat communications That obviates your basic hedonistic predilection For a rhythmic stroking of your fur to demonstrate affection.

A tail is quite essential for your acrobatic talents; You would not be so agile if you lacked its counterbalance.

And when not being utilized to aid in locomotion, It often serves to illustrate the state of your emotion.

Sydney I love that you greet me at the door, with my shoe in your mouth. I love that you encourage me to get outdoors, your leash in your mouth. I love that you lean against me when I pet you, your toy in your mouth.

You are mischievously cute!

SCURVY

O Spot, the complex levels of behavior you display Connote a fairly well-developed cognitive array.

And though you are not sentient, Spot, and do not comprehend, I nonetheless consider you a true and valued friend.

Stella You are the most intense and obsessive four-legged I know.

I apologize for not living on a farm with sheep for you to herd. You have found other jobs, like barking at crows, chewing underwear, and nipping at skateboarders. Lucky for you, your coat is soft, your eyes are velvety, and you jump off the couch before we see you.

The Dude This Dude, with whom I reside Is my one true love, I must confide.

Although many times, for food he has cried He’s the coolest cat on the East Side.

My Valentine I cannot hide Tis you, Dude, it will not be denied.

For you I would cross the great divide Because Dude, you always abide.

SIMON THE BENGAL CAT

Steve For our walks called “leashure time,” for the time at the bank I told them to put the money in “our” account, for the time you had to wear a cone and I wore a lampshade, for warding off the nighttime monsters and the wintertime blues, Steve, I love you!

Stretch We love those fuzzy paws as they run in the muddy Park.

We love that goofy-highpitched bark.

We love your crazy squirrel addiction We love that floppy ear contradiction.

We even love the way you wake us up.

But mostly, we just love you little pup.

-M&D

SYD VICIOUS

Sulee Eight years ago I found you flea-ridden and nearly dead.

Now you sleep in my sink and gnaw on the butter left out on the counter. You are my heart.

Sully You are such a great addition to the Rogue Ales Family.

Everyday you help watch over the comings and goings at our Hop Farm. You made friends with the chickens, turkeys, pigs, Bed n Hop guests, and Chatoe customers. Hugs and Hops to you Sully, The Rogue Ales Family

Thomas To my baby Boy Tom Tom, you’re soo rambunctious, I love you like a fat kid loves cheesecake, you’re the apple of my eye, you’re my gray love of my life, so handsome and sweet. I will love you forever and ever.. and EVER.! I hope I have made you happy and I hope you live a LONG HEALTHY FULL LIFE!!

Love your mama Janice!! <3 <3 <3 Titus Elliot Aaron Friezerson Sweetest Baby-boy: You were mine the minute I saw the fuzzy snapshot of you as a little bean, eyes closed and army-crawling. You have brought more joy, peace, love and adorable to this family than anyone has a right to. On our first Valentine’s Day together, let me run the risk of ridicule by saying you are one of the loves of my life and my soul mate. I love you, Titus!

Titus Lucretius Could you be the only man I can count on? I find you by my side in my desperate moments... warm and handsome with your oddly reassuring patrician nose and dark gray fur. Your only fault? Not being human. Your greatest gift? Not being human.

TITUS ELLIOT AARON FRIEZERSON

Sully and Gordon Gordon’s Ode to Sully Skinny, furless spirit—touched me instantly Together we healed and grew stronger at moments you channel our boy, sleeping on his bed, playing with his toys Now with full coat and massive personality; fill our hearts and deeply cherished You, my long tailed tabby, walk in the paw prints of our beloved Dane.

Syd Vicious You’ve kept me from finding an apartment, hate the people I date and keep my bank account in check by landing yourself at the vet for swallowing...every-

Sylar Though you ate our couch, chewed up the outside of the fridge, and scared the mailman, we still love you. And even though sometimes you wake up in the middle of the night to puke in my shoes, I know you mean well. You’re still the world’s most lovable, amazing dog!

ZOI & LIL

TJ Ever since we adopted TJ he has been the light of our life.

No matter what kind of day that we had at work or with family, when we get home the love and kisses and running around with TJ will make you forget about all your worries.

Just walking in that door, laying on the floor, just to receive all those hugs & kisses puts you in a better mood. Even through these hard and depressing times TJ just smiles, chases his tail, barks, runs up and down through the house and kitchen... just makes you forget everything. The whole neighborhood is in love with TJ. He has several girlfriends that walk by, looking for him to say hello or get a kiss on their way home or to work. TJ gets more presents than me and my wife combined!

He is so spoiled, he rides in the car like “Let’s go, Dad, next stop please,” he’s so funny. Ask anyone in our neighborhood and they will all say we love TJ.

Tom-Tom Happy Valentine’s Day to my cat, I love you no matter where you’re at!

Too Bad You are my grey cat and I have mad love for you, despite your frequent need to have your stinky butt wiped clean. Not loving the skids, babe, but you have a lifetime guarantee.

Tootsie I just wanted you to know that I have loved you since the day I saw your BIG emerald eyes and BIG GREMLIN ears... when you got handed to me in the parking lot of a Petco in Vancouver, Wash. You fit in the palm of my hand and I cried because you where the cutest kitten I had ever seen in my life. I hope I have been a good mommy to you and I also hope you live a FULL HEALTHY VERRRRY LONG LIFE! I LOVE you soo much my SHUUSHI Bear. <3 <3 <3 Love Your Mama Janice Denniston Tuff You are so goddamn stupid that you deserve nothing more than to be loved and cuddled as much as possible. Kelsey and I will still kick your ass.

Waffles You are a piglet a puglet a 5-month-old snugglet. stealing covers from the bed, always begging to be fed. licking snacks up off the floor, by the way you snore snore snore. we love you with all our hearts, and excuse your stinky farts! xoxo h & b Wallace You are a saint among dogs. you let your pal maeby sit on you all the time and only groan a little. aside from that one murdered squirrel, you are a friend to all. you’re aces, champ.

Waverley Sugar Bumpkin Mister Whiskers Buttbrain We’ve been mauled, bitten, and stabbed in the face by your fits of passion. We clean your vomit and never receive bartender tips. We rarely get a good night’s rest because you sleep on us and you are huge. In short, you’ve trained us well for human children. Thank you Winnie My friend, my companion, my child, my dog Your needle nose butts into me for attention You bark at waves and hyperventilate as we approach your favorite hiking trail I love you so much Boogs, Winn, Kooks, Babe Don’t ever leave me forlorn, alone missing you forever.

Wishbone Happy Valentine’s Day to a true weirdo. If I could provide a world of urinals, meat, and blankets for you I would, but in the meantime I will continue to save your life daily by feeding you a kidney diet & catching you before you fall down the stairs.

Woodrow & Ranger You two are so easy to love!

Woodrow, you are truly the ambassador of love. Ranger, you have such an earnest soul.

Happy Valentine’s Day to my better halves! Always, Jessica Zoi & Lil Queen among cats She is the strongest She will bring happiness to families CAT & HUMAN - LONG LIFE

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

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FOOD: Holy pierogi, that’s tasty kielbasa!

MUSIC: Portland’s favorite screwing songs.

VISUAL ARTS: Joe Thurston at Elizabeth Leach.

MOVIES: Your guide to PIFF.

26 29 43 45

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GOSSIP THAT CAN BOTH THROW AND CATCH THE BALL.

FEARNOMUSIC AND YU PRESENT 100 YEARS OF

R.I.P.: Former longtime KNRK radio programmer and Portland music advocate Jaime Cooley died of what her family termed “a tragic accidental drowning” Saturday, Feb. 4.

She was 33. Cooley began at KNRK in 1995, when she was 17, and eventually became the assistant program director and music director before being laid off in 2008. Cooley also helped launch the all-regional HD station “94.7 Too,” which she was initially responsible for programming. A memorial show will be held at Lola’s Room starting at 5 pm Friday, Feb. 10, and the family is requesting that donations be made in Cooley’s name to Pacific Pug Rescue. Cooley’s favorite song, according to her family, was the Cure’s “Just Like Heaven.”

AERO BLESSED: Not only will the 2012 United States Barista Championships be held in Portland in April, word now comes that the World AeroPress Championships will be part of the festivities. The AeroPress is a Space Age coffee-brewing device that looks a bit like a penis pump and is popular in Europe. The competition tends to attract baristas from some of the world’s top coffee purveyors. >> In other coffee news, portlandfoodanddrink.com reports that Northwest Portland’s Sterling Coffee kiosk will close, after losing its lease. In a follow-up item on coffee gossip site Sprudge.com, owner Adam McGovern said he plans to open a “cart-type” space in Northwest and a roastery, probably in Old Town.

BIG-ASS STATE: Garden State, the super-popular and much-missed food cart—it once appeared on Good Morning America—is still closed. Chef Kevin Sandri is doing a guest slot from 11 am to 4 pm Wednesday, Feb. 8, at the Big-Ass Sandwiches cart (Southwest 3rd Avenue and Ash Street).

Menu at gardenstatecart.com.

FEARNOMUSIC & SELECT COLLABORATORS, INCLUDING OREGON SYMPHONY MUSIC DIRECTOR CARLOS KALMAR, WILL PRESENT ELEVEN CAGE PERFORMANCES THROUGHOUT THE HISTORIC YALE UNION LAUNDRY BUILDING. FEBRUARY 17, 2012 8PM TICKETS ON SALE NOW WWW.FEARNOMUSIC.ORG & WWW.YUCONTEMPORARY.ORG

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Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

SLABTOWN SELLS: Northwest Portland pinball bar and rock club Slabtown, which went up for sale in November, has been sold to 42-year-old Doug Rogers. The bar closed Sunday night after the three-day Bender music festival, but it will reopen under the new ownership Feb. 24. Rogers, an ex-teacher who has dabbled in show-booking, says he will leave much of the business model—pinball, rock music and party vibes—untouched. “My roots go back into the DIY punk scene, and I’m really interested in the community aspect of the music,” he says. This will be Rogers’ first bar, but he says his two biggest influences are Portland’s long-defunct X-Ray Cafe and Berkeley’s 924 Gilman Street. “If anything,” Rogers says, “[Slabtown] will get a little weirder.”

KENNEDY ADMINISTRATION: Another Super Bowl, another PR coup for Wieden+Kennedy. By overwhelming consensus, the agency’s “Halftime in America” ad for Chrysler was the best commercial during the game. But lost in the Monday-morning hullabaloo over whether the Clint Eastwood monologue was pro-Obama is this fact: The speech was written in part by Lents poet Matthew Dickman, poetry editor for Portland literary magazine Tin House. “Halftime in America” was directed

by David Gordon Green, director of All the Real Girls and Your Highness. In a year, will we be saying the Portland ad agency saved the careers of Obama and Green?

HEADOUT PHOTOS BY MIKE GRIPPI

WILLAMETTE WEEK

WHAT TO DO THIS WEEK IN ARTS & CULTURE

WEDNESDAY FEB. 8 DON’T LET SCHOOL INTERFERE WITH YOUR EDUCATION! [POLITICS] “How is it that Africa supplies much of the national resources utilized in the U.S. while Africa, and African people in the U.S., have virtually nothing?” A good question, which Occupy Portland affiliates will discuss at this event, part of the movement’s Black History Month programming.

North Portland Public Library, 512 N Killingsworth St., portlandgeneralassembly.org. 6-8 pm.

THURSDAY FEB. 9

FOOS FIGHTERS FOUR TIPS FOR TOMORROW’S FOOSBALL CHAMPS.

Isaac Bowen and Ryan Harvey know that their sport’s glory days are, for the moment, behind it. The best player in the world, Belgium’s Frédéric Collignon, is a car salesman by day. And while foosball has deep roots in Portland—the uncle of the game’s British inventor lived here when he gave the game its first U.S. patent in 1927—only a handful of local bars have tables. Oregon’s foosing community remains a small, tight-knit group. But Bowen and Harvey, who occasionally make trips to Vegas for competitions, think foosing is overdue for a comeback. “I think video games are eventually going to fall,” Bowen says. “And we’re gonna be ready.”

TIP 1

To stoke the flames of a foosurgence, Bowen has organized a major tournament at Blitz Ladd this weekend. It will feature 10 tables and openings for amateur and pro players. The biggest cash prize of the tourney is projected at $1,440. “We want the old players, the people who are hiding in the corners,” Bowen says. “We want them to see what competition is like.”

Bowen and Harvey taught us a few beginners’ tricks on our rather shabby in-office table—there’s video of the pair demonstrating the techniques at wweek.com. CASEY JARMAN. GO: Tournament registration begins at 6 pm Friday, Feb. 10, at Blitz Ladd, 2239 SE 11th Ave., 236-3592. Tournament competition continues through Sunday, Feb. 12. See portlandfoosball. com for full schedule. $25-$30. All ages.

TIP 2

TIP 4

IGNITE PORTLAND 10 [TECH] The first Ignite event in Portland since organizers Legion of Tech dissolved in a messy embezzlement scandal, this new installment of the five-minute talk phenom will feature topics such as “A Homebrew Cat Feeding Robot,” “How to Impress a Librarian,” “The Hogwarts Textbook” and “My Pet Slug.”

Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 467-7521. Doors open at 5:45 pm, show starts at 7 pm. Bring a non-perishable donation for Oregon Food Bank to get in at 5 pm. Free.

Full lineup at igniteportland.org.

SUNDAY FEB. 12 THE JULIANS [MUSIC] The all-star vocal quartet offers its unexpected yet perfectly compatible mix of classics (Vaughan Williams, Barber, Debussy) and pop (Regina Spektor, Queen, Dolly Parton, Sondheim, the Beatles), all sung with real passion and appropriate style by some of Portland’s finest female classical singers. First Presbyterian Church, 1200 SW Alder St., 228-7331. 2 pm. $10-$12.

MONDAY FEB. 13 Keep your defensive line moving In doubles play, a second player controls the goalie and backfielders—it’s a thin line of defense, so “you want to keep them moving” fluidly, Bowen says. “Don’t ever let [the opponent] see a direct path to the goal.”

DOGGIE WOGGIEZ! POOCHIE WOOCHIEZ! [MOVIES, KINDA] You think that title is appalling? Consider the content: It is found VHS footage of dogs assembled into an all-canine remake of Alejandro Jodorowsky’s 1973 film The Holy Mountain. We do not understand how this happened, but we are the people who brought you dog valentines, so we don’t have a lot of room to criticize here. Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 493-1128. 7:30 pm. $8 advance, $10 at door.

TIP 3

Find your power stance “In all games, you’ve got to keep your body out of the way,” Harvey says.

“Most players put their left foot forward, and you don’t want your grip to be way under or way over the top.”

Practice ball control Practice lateral passes between two players on the same team. “Feel the ball, see how it reacts,” Harvey says.

“Having ball control is really important to your passing game.”

The snake shot While spinning players is illegal in most tournament play, quick, controlled spins of 359 degrees or less have become the preferred scoring method for foosball pros. “In a long tournament, it saves a lot of energy,” Harvey says of the move, in which a player uses one’s wrist to spin the metal bar.

TUESDAY FEB. 14 CHALI 2NA [MUSIC] Chali 2na doesn’t have a lot in common with Barry White, but their voices are not altogether dissimilar. And since Barry is now making sweet love in heaven, we think taking your Valentine’s Day date to see the Jurassic 5 MC is a pretty good backup plan. Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 8 pm. $16 advance, $18 day of show. 21+.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

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FOOD & DRINK = WW Pick. Highly recommended.

By RUTH BROWN. PRICES: $: Most entrees under $10. $$: $10-$20. $$$: $20-$30. $$$$: Above $30.

Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: dish@wweek.com. See page 3 for submission instructions.

FRIDAY, FEB. 10 Experience Tequila at Trébol

4-Course Meal with Beer Pairings $60 couple • reservations advised 503-477-9619 • 4111 SE Hawthorne 971-266-8392 • 1517 NE Brazee details at oregonhophouse.com

Trébol Mexican Restaurant teams up with Experience Tequila—a Portlandbased tequila promotion company— for a “Valentine’s dinner” (it’s on the 10th, not the 14th, but close enough, I guess). The dinner costs $30 with a $6 Corazon tequila cocktail available for each of the three courses, or a tasting flight for $10. “Tequila ambassador” Clayton Szczech will be on hand to talk piñas and masquow, as tequila nerds are wont to do. Trebol, 4835 N Albina Ave., 517-9347. 5 pm. $30, plus drinks. 21+.

Valentine’s Day with Din Din

Supper-club Din Din is hosting a V-day dinner. The draft menu includes braised short rib in romesco broth, lamb carpaccio and orecchiette and mussels with saffron cream. The $85 price tag comes with Italian wine pairings.

The Little Church, 5138 NE 23rd Ave. 7 pm. $85.

Valentine’s Day at Wildwood

Unlike most restaurants, which are just offering an evening meal for V-day, Wildwood is doing lunch as well, for people who want to spend the evening having sex, or those with multiple partners, I would guess. Wildwood, 1221 NW 21st Ave., 248-9663. 11:30 am-2:30 pm and 5-9:45 pm. Prices vary.

EAT MOBILE MIKE GRIPPI

double mountain Valentine’s Day dinner

SUNDAY, FEB. 12 Carbonated Cocktail Seminar with Jeffrey Morgenthaler

Carbonated cocktails—they’re the hottest bar trend since pickle backs and bone luges—and Portland’s king of the boozy bottled beverage is Clyde Common’s Jeffrey Morgenthaler. The Portland Culinary Alliance is hosting Morgenthaler for a seminar on the history of these drinks and the techniques and recipes used to make them. Register at pdxca.org/upcoming-events.

Oregon Culinary Institute, 1701 SW Jefferson St., 961-6200. 2-3:30 pm. $25 for PCA members, $30 for nonmembers. 21+.

Valentine’s Day at Pix Pâtisserie

UPCOMING IN-STORE PERFORMANCES DANIEL ELLSWORTH & THE GREAT LAKES THURSDAY 2/9 @ 6PM

The members of The Great Lakes hail from across our great nation, bringing with them a unique mélange of stories and the diverse cultures of their respective hometowns.

Their new, self-produced album ‘Civilized Man’ is itself something of a departure from the singer/songwriter category of the rest of Ellsworth’s catalog. As the first official release from the band, it represents a fresh start musically - a whole new set of influences, from The Talking Heads to Wilco.

BLACK PUSSY

FRIDAY 2/10 @ 6PM

On Blonde was written and recorded by Dustin Hill, it’s his baby. He’s usually in White Orange with Adam Pike (who guests here), and rocks Black Pussy with bassist Pike, guitarist Ryan McIntire, backing vocalist Madeline Mahrie, and guitarist Peter Meissner (the latter also did the mind-blowing pop art album artwork). Wild and furious White Orange drummer Dean Carroll is drumming for Black Pussy when they play out live as well.

PARFAIT

SATURDAY 2/11 @ 5PM

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Pix Pâtisserie celebrates Valentine’s Day at its North Williams location with a special tea for two. Lovers will receive 15 sweet and savory small bites—including heart-shaped macarons, oysters, chocolate roses and pastries—and two pots of tea.

An extra $30 gets you a bottle of sparkling wine. Also, on the day, both Pix locations will hide a pair of diamond-stud earrings inside a chocolate gift box—which sounds guaranteed to get the recipient laid.

Pix Pâtisserie-North, 3901 N Williams Ave., 282-6539. 11 am-4 pm. $90 with wine, $60 without. Reservations required.

TUESDAY, FEB. 14 Valentine’s Day at Acadia

Louisiana-inspired restaurant Acadia offers a four-course Valentine’s dinner for $65, with choices including Louisiana barbecue shrimp, blue-crab fritters, rabbit, tasso and andouille sausage gumbo, pan-fried speckled trout, lobster-étouffée pot pie and cochon crépinette. Laissez les bons temps rouler. Acadia, 1303 NE Fremont St., 249-5001. 5-10 pm. $65 per person.

Valentine’s Day at Aviary

Buzzy Northeast Alberta Street eatery Aviary is offering a fourcourse, $55-per-head Valentine’s Day dinner, including arctic char crudo, truffled egg toast and panroasted squab. For $25, lovey-dovey diners can get matched wine pairings. Aviary, 1733 NE Alberta St., 287-2400. 5-10 pm. $55.

Valentine’s Day at Lincoln Parfait was born in April 1981 in Benin (West Africa). From there he traveled with his family throughout the West African region of Niger and Senegal before making the big journey to the United States of America.

Parfait has recently released his sophomore album ‘Faceless Love.’ After the French debut album ‘Bonjour Babylon’ showcased his talent as a hip-hop producer and rapper, Parfait has marked a new stage in his development as an artist with this eclectic acoustic album.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

Lincoln does Valentine’s with a three-course menu. Choices include foie gras torchon, pork cheeks with risotto milanese, lamb osso buco, cassoulet of pork sausage, duck confit, roasted pork belly and white beans and filet of sole. Lincoln, 3808 N Williams Ave., 288-6200. 5:30-9 pm. $50 per person.

Valentine’s Day at Noble Rot

Noble Rot offers Valentine’s with a view and a three-course dinner for $55 per head, with dishes including shrimp risotto, foie-gras brûlée, beef short rib and pacific rockfish. Noble Rot, 1111 E Burnside St., 233-1999. $55.

BIG DOG: Polish sausage is the centerpiece of a combo plate.

POLISH KITCHEN What do Poles eat during the summer? The Polish fare familiar stateside is heavily skewed toward cured meats and root vegetables—foods that are hard to imagine enjoying on Baltic beaches. I can’t speak about a warm day in Warsaw, but the pierogi at the Polish Kitchen cart at the Q-19 pod tasted great on a shockingly bright and balmy Groundhog Day. Fat, pan-cooked kielbasa with mildly spicy brown mustard is the cart’s main protein option, either as a big sandwich on a hoagie roll ($4.75) or as the centerpiece of the combo plates. Go for one of the plates with pierogi, as this Order this: Combo plate No. 1 ($7). cart’s impressive potato-andBest deal: Kielbasa sandwich ($4.75).

I’ll pass: Beef-stuffed cabbage ($3.50). onion and vegetable-stuffed versions topped with a dollop of sour cream and a few slices of cucumber are the sort of thing you might want to order as a plate. And you can—nine for $6.50. The stuffed cabbage ($3.50), filled with rice and ground beef and topped with a thin tomato sauce, is also respectable if not deliriously good.

Ditto the Hunter’s Stew, a sauerkraut dish with big hunks of sausage cooked until it was a little too soupy for my taste. Cabbage tastes better with a little crispness, especially on a warm day—it might be worth returning to on a gray, drizzly afternoon. Portland will surely have a few to come, if Phil was right. MARTIN CIZMAR. EAT: Polish Kitchen, Q-19 cart pod, Northwest Quimby Street and 19th Avenue. 11 am-3 pm, Monday-Friday. $.

DRANK

CLEM’S CREAM ALE (MIGRATION BREWING CO.) The appeal of cream ales lies mostly in nostalgia—the style’s popularity peaked in the ’70s, led by lighter-than-lite Genesee Cream Ale. With Clem’s Cream Ale, Portland’s Migration Brewing used flaked oats and a kiss of Willamette hops to make a super smooth beer. It’s incredibly mild, with almost no distinguishing flavor beyond some esters. At 4.6 percent, it’s far lower in alcohol than most craft beers, though you won’t taste even that much in this light blond ale with half the bite of a good Kölsch. How to make such a thing even smoother? Serve it off a nitrogen tap, the way dry Irish stouts like Guinness get their soft body and plump head, which is exactly what Horse Brass Pub is doing. Bushy mustaches are back, and Clem’s frothy head would look at home in a Selleck ’stache provided you’re not looking for much flavor. Personally, I’m not so nostalgic. MARTIN CIZMAR.

FOOD & DRINK

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Shandong cuisine of northern china DIP AND SIP: The bagna cauda with veggies and a flute of brut rosé at Coppia.

A PAIR TO REMEMBER catch the sweeter notes of a notoriously acidic wine. If the technical detail of this answer was startling, the genuine enthusiasm of the lesson was contagious.

BY AA R O N M E S H amesh@wweek.com It also doesn’t hurt that he’s right. The most inspired coupling I tried was at dessert: The Blind item: What famed Portland director of table’s shared plate of chocolate panna cotta was various Afflecks was recently seen supping at Pearl accompanied by a small chalice of Cana’s Feast District dining hotspot Coppia with a statuesque Chinato d’Erbetti, a Carlton-bottled fortified blonde companion? Looks like this Hollywood wine similar to vermouth. The sticky sweetness player knows how to find a star pairing! of chinato is usually best cut with soda, but a Enough of that. It’s true that Coppia is an small portion perfectly complemented small effort by owner Timothy Nishimoto—a vocalist bites of very rich chocolate custard—decadence for Pink Martini—to up the wattage of his wine in miniature. bar, Vino Paradiso. But six months after the faceOther meals were not so revelatory, though if lift, the place remains somewhat anonymous. Its the Pearl condo set has the sock to afford every decor is the traditional Pearl motif (“We’d like to suggested mating of food and drink, they may fare be an art gallery, but we will settle for being the better. The tajarin with wild boar ragu was too really nice part of a major airemphatic in its Parmesan— port”) and its Piedmontese Order this: The bagna cauda, the quail and inferior in its component menu doesn’t distinguish and the panna cotta—and follow those parts to the tajarin at Tabla itself from most chichi dining wine suggestions! and the boar ragu at Lincoln. deal: Nearly everything on the antiin the city. When the subject Best To be fair, these are the best pasti menu is under $10, and worth more. of our attentions was spotted I’ll pass: The cheese plates are heavy on examples of those dishes in last week, he was tucked into the filberts and walnut bread. I didn’t find Portland, but if Steinbrecher one of the restaurant’s deeply mine otherwise memorable. is aiming for those heights, unfortunate back booths, he has a ways to climb. where the seats are so low they turn a dinner date The quail and steak dishes were likewise into a first Thanksgiving at the grown-ups’ table. unimpeachable (and the quail notable for being But these deficiencies are worth overlooking almost entirely deboned and wrapped like a because of Coppia’s primary conceit: Every item jacket around a bouquet of mushrooms). But the on chef Aren Steinbrecher’s menu, all the way strongest individual dishes were the antipasti: down to the five cheese plates, is paired with a the bagna cauda like a garlicky Piedmontese different wine. This plays to its abiding strength fondue; the celery salad peppered with buzzas Nishimoto, once dubbed the “Singing Somme- ingly tart capers; the wild mushroom soup a lier” by Wine Spectator, knows his way around a comforting blend of diced mushrooms, chicken varietal. stock and cream.

It helps, of course, when Nishimoto is actuIt’s no insult to say Coppia only really flowers ally your server, as he was for my party on a quiet when the food is accompanied with its vineyard weeknight. When he substituted my default partner—rather, that’s just saying it only works glass with a stouter, rounder model to pour my as it’s intended. The effort to make dishes worthy Burlotto Nebbiolo (the suggested companion of the wine is laudable and largely successful. If for my flank steak), I asked what the difference some of the plates are still ordinary, take another was. He hesitated slightly before launching into a sip: Everything will seem a tad more famous. detailed explanation of how the thick base of the glass would give an indistinct aroma more space EAT: Coppia, 417 NW 10th Ave., 295-9536, coppiaportland.com. 4-10 pm Tuesday-Thursday, to breathe, while the narrow rim would direct a 4-11 pm Friday-Saturday. $$$. sip to the front end of the tongue, which would

COPPIA REMAINS A VINTER’S PARADISE— NOW WITH FOOD TO MATCH.

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YOUR KITCHEN FOR THAI FOOD 2231 W Burnside + 6 more: t h a i o r c h i d r e s t a u r a n t.c o m Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

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FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 10 LOLA’S ROOM 9 PM $5 21+OVER

CHALI 2NA

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 8 FREE

THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 9

PURLING HISS

5:30 p.m. is “eagle time” • free

FREE

FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 10

MON FEB 13 ALL AGES

FRI FEB 10 ALL AGES

5:30 p.m. is “eagle time” • free

REVERB BROTHERS

ADAM SWEENEY AND THE JAMBOREE LONE MADRONE SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 11 5:30 p.m. is “eagle time” • free

BOTTLECAP BOYS WORTH CORY DAUBER

Big Head Todd and the Monsters PERFORMING "MIDNIGHT RADIO" IN ITS ENTIRETY

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 12

OPEN MIC/SINGER SONGWRITER SHOWCASE FEATURING PORTLAND’S FINEST TALENT 6:30 P.M. SIGN-UP; 7 P.M. MUSIC· FREE

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 13

Roger Clyne

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TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 14

STARLIGHT GIRLS IT HUGS BACK PHEASANT FREE

DJ Rev Shines

wed feb 29 ALL AGES

MUSIC AT 8:30 P.M. MON-THUR 9:30 P.M. FRI & SAT

FRI & SAT MAR 2 & 3 ALL AGES

(UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED)

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2/12-18

2/8-11

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KENNY HENRY HILL BROWN KAMMERER

Friday, February 10, 17, 24

Portlandia also Friday Night TV Party

Saturday, February 11

Miz Kitty’s Parlour

Saturday, February 11

Opera vs. Cinema: Masterclass: The Art of Film Accompaniment

Monday, February 13

History Talk

Tuesday and Wednesday, February 14 & 15

Mortified Portland

Wednesday, February 22

OMSI Science Pub

Sunday, February 26

84th Academy Awards

BINGO-RINGLERS 2/22 THE FRAY 2/24 PDX JAZZ FESTIVAL: BILL FRISELL 2/25 PDX JAZZ FESTIVAL: VIJAY IYER, PRASANNA & NITTIN MITTA (3 PM) 2/25 PDX JAZZ FESTIVAL: CHARLIE HUNTER (9:30 PM) 3/4 MARCH FOURTH MARCHING BAND JAY FERRAR, YIM YAMES, WILL JOHNSON & ANDERS PARKER 3/14 let’s dance for harper 3/15 NEEDTOBREATHE 3/16 GEORGE CLINTON 3/21 DRIVE-BY TRUCKERS 3/22 KAISER CHIEFS 3/23 OF MONTREAL 3/24 GALACTIC 3/30 CAROLINA CHOCOLATE DROPS 3/31 DARK STAR ORCHESTRA 3/31 JAI HO!-lola’s 4/7 MARK & BRIAN 4/11 GOTYE-SOLD OUT! 4/18 & 19 JEFF MANGUM 4/25 ESPERANZA SPALDING 4/27 WILD FLAG 5/2 SNOW PATROL 5/25 TRAMPLED BY TURTLES 5/27 IMELDA MAY

Thursday, April 19

2/11

at CRYSTAL

Friday, February 10

GABBY HOLT

ALADDIN THEATER PRESENTS

AL’S DEn

City Club of Portland Film Series

WILL WEST & TANNER CUNDY

SAT FEB 18 $5 • 9 p.m. • 21 & over • LOLA’S ROOM

special guest

3/9

Wednesday, February 8

THE STUDENT LOAN

(OF JURASSIC 5)

TUE FEB 14 21 & OVER LOLA'S ROOM

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LIVE STAGE & BIG SCREEN! COLD HARD GROUND

FRI FEB 17 21 & OVER

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1624 N.W. Glisan • Portland 503-223-4527

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Josh and Mer ^ YOURS

WITH VJ KITTYROX

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The historic

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PDX Jazz: The Bridge Quartet: Crossing Into The Monkasphere

Saturday, May 12

Moshe Kasher

Thursday, May 24

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ELSEWHERE

2/9

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OUTLETS: CRYSTAL BALLROOM BOX OFFICE, BAGDAD THEATER, EDGEFIELD, EAST 19TH ST. CAFÉ (EUGENE)

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

2/14

Rock Creek Tavern

OPEN BLUEGRASS JAM Bring your banjo · 7 p.m.

Find us on

Crystal Ballroom Friday, March 16

MUSIC Tope, TxE/Living Proof Zapp & Roger’s “Computer Love.” Basically one of the first things I inquire about a girl is her knowledge of this song. It pretty much goes like this: “What’s your name again? Are you a fan of Zapp & Roger?” If the answer to the second question is no, there’s a 90 percent chance we won’t even continue speaking. Side note: If anyone has sex while Lil Wayne’s music is playing in the background, they are officially committing a crime and their partner should immediately alert the authorities.

Lauren K. Newman/LKN Truth be told, I am not a fan of prerecorded tunes blasting while engaging in the making of love. However, one of the most passionate, near-tantric love-making sessions I participated in with my lover was soundtracked by the album Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere by Neil Young.

Each time we both neared the rim of ecstasy, “Cinnamon Girl” happened to be playing, or so it seemed. That song definitely turned me on as well as my partner, something to do with the line “the drummer relaxes and waits between shows for his cinnamon girl.” Just sexy. To be noted, the four other discs in rotation that day/night/day were by Townes Van Zandt, Fleetwood Mac, Confessor and Barry White. All highly recommended sexual-intercourse jams.

SONGS TO SEAL THE V-DAY DEAL PORTLAND MUSICIANS PRESENT AND DEFEND THEIR FAVORITE SEX JAMS.

BY C ASE Y JA R M A N

cjarman@wweek.com

Most Portland musicians don’t want to talk about doing it.

Or so it seemed when we asked dozens of Portland musicians about their favorite sex songs. Like with so many other topics, it’s all in how you ask the question. So here are some of Portland’s finest on their favorite sweaty, nasty hump-jams and/or the songs they find to be steamy. Happy Valentine’s Day, and good luck with your holiday sexing.

Katy Davidson, Key Losers My favorite sex jam is the album Naked Acid by Valet, played in its entirety. Picture slow-motion jet skiing over the moon Europa. This is a journey from which you probably won’t return. Also, don’t ever decide it’s a good idea to put on Toto IV when you’re gonna do it. “Rosanna” and “Africa” are not sexy songs.

Cloudy October I’ve got to go with Prince’s “The Beautiful Ones” off of Purple Rain. Whether this song is sexy or not is really, of course, subjective. Well, it’s Prince, so I bet it’s like federally registered as sexy. It has a gamut of emotions going on, it seems. A musical climax and resolution that matches the written composition, which was given a third interpretation in the film Purple Rain, visually. Sounds fresh every time I listen to it, and it’s been almost 30 years since the shit came out. That’s hard.

Tony Ozier, Doo Doo Funk All-Stars My song has to be “Adore” off of Prince’s Sign o’ the Times record. Just a straight, dirty baby-makin’ ballad!

Ben Darwish Ginuwine, “Pony.” One of the sexiest R&B jams of all time.

Props to Timbaland for the distinct and infectious “toad croak” bass line.

Sara Hernandez, The Angry Orts “I’m Your Man,” by Leonard Cohen. It has a dark, almost Lynchian sound about it, and Cohen’s low growl adds a sort of dangerous shiver to its slinky feel. The opening lines (“If you want a lover, I’ll do anything you ask me to/ And if you want another kind of love, I’ll wear a mask for you”) are total sex. And you just can’t beat that ’80s synth solo.

Lisa Schonberg, STLS A meadow full of crickets.

Kyle Morton, Typhoon “I’ve Been Thinking” by Handsome Boy Modeling School (featuring Chan Marshall). Too sexy.

DJ Wicked “Freaks of the Industry” by Digital Underground. “You’re taxin’ it and waxin’ it and workin’ it around/ ’Til the booty starts makin’ that clappin’ sound” Steven Hefter, St. Even “Je T’Aime Moi Non Plus” by Serge Gainsbourg.

Incomprehensible whisper-crooning, moaning and cooing in la langue de l’amour and shit.

Adam Shearer, Weinland/Alialujah Choir Joe Simon’s “Let’s Spend the Night Together.” Just listen to it, you’ll understand.

Lizzy Ellison, Radiation City “He Perdido Contigo,” by Omara Portuondo. I like to imagine Salma Hayek, bust very visible, whilst cooking some amazing Hispanic dish. I’m not saying that I want her personally, but she exudes sex just the same as this song.

Seductive, yet playful. Obviously perfect.

Jen Bernard, The Stolen Sweets When my BF and I first started hookin’ up, Sigur Rós’ Takk had just come out. Somehow, it became our ad hoc love soundtrack. Nothing says “hot” like oozing, orchestral, extraterrestrial Icelandic mood pop.

Mike Midlo, Pancake Breakfast Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong doing “Cheek to Cheek.” You know, old Barry White sets the tone like nobody else, and Ike and Tina Turner, they can seal the deal every time. But after celebrating 23 years’ worth of Valentine’s nights with the same woman, I tell you—it’s not as much as about sparks and flames as it is the warmth of the fire. And for me, this Ella and Louis duet gets down to the glowing embers of it all.

Danny Seim, Menomena I wish I had some insight to offer you here. I’ve honestly never really listened to music during sex, unless you count the Hulk Hogan theme song “Real American,” and that was only because it was blasting out over the loudspeakers in the arena attached to the men’s room I was in at the time.

Alan Singley Teddy Pendergrass, “Turn Off the Lights.” The lyrics might inspire some giggles, but that never hurt. Teddy reminds the listener what it means to be a considerate and hygienic lover. Plus, you gotta love that lush, tight Philly production.

Amanda Spring, Point Juncture, WA “An Echo In” by the Sea and Cake is hot-hot-hot. The whole Glass EP, in fact, provides a great backdrop for getting fresh. I don’t know if it’s John McEntire’s tight, driving beats or Sam Prekop’s whispery vocals that get me. I’d pit it against many a “Girl, I’m going to sex you” ballad any day.

DJ Spark/Sparker Lewis, Sandpeople What’s the whole point of this article when we all know the sexiest, most doing-it-est song of all-time is “Lemme Smang It” by Yung Humma and Flynt Flo$$y? A more appropriate question would be what’s your second favorite doing-it anthem? In which case, I would also answer, “Lemme Smang It” by Yung Humma and Flynt Flo$$y.

Courtney Sheedy, Team Evil Beach House’s “Real Love” gets me every time. It’s pretty long, and the ohs are built in.

Liv Warfield Betty Wright, “Tonight is the Night.” When I first heard this song, I had to turn the volume down from my parents. But now, honey, this is grown-folk lovin’. It’s just right for me.

Chris Funk, The Decemberists I have a kid. I don’t do it anymore.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

29

SOUL’D OUT MUSIC FESTIVAL ON SALE FRIDAY!

RADIO MUSIC SOCIETY

APRIL 25TH • CRYSTAL BALLROOM 8PM • ALL AGES

SALLIE FORD

Foxy Shazam

& THE SOUND OUTSIDE

Crown Jewel Defence

SAT APRIL 21ST • ROSELAND • 8PM • 21+

FEB 23RD • ROSELAND • 8PM • ALL AGES

APRIL 25TH • CRYSTAL BALLROOM 8PM • ALL AGES

Hypster • Joe Garston • Evan Alexander

FEB 28TH • PETER’S ROOM@ROSELAND • 8PM • ALL AGES

CARINA ROUND

ON SALE NOW!

MARCH 14TH • 8PM • ALL AGES ARLENE SCHNITZER CONCERT HALL

with

balkan beat box MARCH 14TH • ROSELAND • 9PM • ALL AGES

FEB 21ST • DANTE’S • 9PM • 21+

PENGUIN PRISON THE END IS NEAR TOUR FRI MARCH 2ND • PETER’S ROOM@ROSELAND • 9PM • ALL AGES STEADY MADE MUSIC PRESENTS

PENGUIN PRISON

MARCH 15TH • ROSELAND • 8PM • ALL AGES

NEW ALBUM OUT MARCH

APRIL 11 • ROSELAND • 8PM • ALL AGES

MARCH 13TH • ROSELAND • 8PM • ALL AGES

FRIDAY NIGHT! FEB 10TH • ROSELAND • 8PM • ALL AGES

MICHAEL SCHENKER GROUP

The Dead Meat Tour

STEVE AOKI DATSIK

STEADY THE BOSS • DJ CHILL

SIGMA • SIDE STEP

FRIDAY FEB 17TH • DANTE’S • 9PM • 21+

MACHINE GUN KELLY • KRIZZ KALIKO MAYDAY • PROZAK • STEVIE STONE

APRIL 26TH • ROSELAND • 9PM • ALL AGES

MAY 3RD • ROSELAND • 8PM • ALL AGES

ADVANCE TICKETS THROUGH ALL TICKETSWEST LOCATIONS, SAFEWAY, MUSIC MILLENNIUM. TO CHARGE BY PHONE PLEASE CALL 503.224.8499 30

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

FEB. 8-14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and socalled convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines.

Editor: CASEY JARMAN. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to wweek.com/ submitevents and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: cjarman@wweek.com.

Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, FEB. 8 Wilco, White Denim

[SILLY LOVE SONGS] Wilco is a band that has attempted to throw fans off its scent since its second album, 1996’s Being There. Those hoping for alt-country’s savior were quickly puzzled by the feedback and bar-rock jams on its sophomore album, just as fans of the ambitious and rocking fourth record, 2002’s Yankee Hotel Foxtrot, were confused by Wilco’s jazzy jamming on subsequent discs (though the addition of free-wheeling guitarist Nels Cline has, if anything, brought some consistency to the band’s sound). Last year’s The Whole Love, though, feels suspiciously like a sequel to Yankee Hotel: The new album is a collection of brief, catchy tunes alternately damaged and prettied-up by nerdy studio experimentation. Of course, in concert, as on record, one is never quite sure what to expect of this rightly lauded Chicago sextet. CASEY JARMAN. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 8 pm. Sold out. All ages.

EVENT 2: Claudia Meza (of Stay Calm), Shannon Steele (of Typhoon), Richard Laws (of Hosannas), Chris Cantino (of Archers), Dorian Duvall (of Onuinu), Booth Wilson (of Support Force), DJ Snakks

[DELIGHT OR DISASTER] Look at all those names up there. It’s a veritable who’s who of Portland music’s cutting edge. Few of them have much in common stylistically. High Scores and Records doesn’t care. This new quarterly series, curated by the local label, brings together artists from some of the scene’s best bands for a mostly improvised all-star jam session. The first installment brought together members of Y La Bamba, Loch Lomond and Ages & Ages, among others, which seemed a more natural mixture than this one.

There are only two places an experiment like this can go: transcendentally great or trainwreckishly terrible. Either way, it should be fascinating to watch.

MATTHEW SINGER. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 239-7639. 8:30 pm. $5.

21+.

Nothing Lasts Forever: Don Haugen, M Scott McGahan, Jonathan Christ

[NOISE FROM EUGENE] In the 2000s, Eugene, of all places, developed a potent noise-music scene and became a stop on the West Coast tours of noise artists traveling up from L.A. or down from Vancouver, B.C., or Seattle.

This is largely thanks to the presence of some homegrown, lo-fi sonic adventurers, and a (sadly now defunct) downtown art center that provided a sympathetic late-night venue for their experiments, sometimes in conjunction with film and other visual-art exhibitions. Tonight, two of Eugene’s most accomplished noise generators— Don Haugen (Holy Rodent, Warning Broken Machine, ManDom) and M Scott McGahan (The NecroSluts, INRI, Vivimancer, Scrolls)—join Jonathan Christ, who curates the Lovecraft Bar’s monthly noise series, now celebrating its first anniversary. BRETT CAMPBELL. The Lovecraft, 421 SE Grand Ave., 971270-7760. 9 pm. Free. 21+.

Turtle VanDemarr and Friends

[FREAKY RAMBLES] Turtle VanDemarr, best known locally for his work with the Freak Mountain Ramblers, has a long and illustrious career behind him that has included an eight-year engagement alongside Dan Hicks and a handful of other projects, including the recently reunited

Holy Modal Rounders spinoff outfit Richard Cranium and the Phoreheads.

Turtle is at his best when plucking and singing off-kilter traditional blues and jazz tunes, and that’s what he does an awful lot of on the new compilation The Fastest Turtle in the Universe, comprising largely bootleggish live cuts featuring VanDemarr in a handful of musical settings. Expect a lot of special guests fresh out of the Wayback Machine at this, a celebration of the new disc and of VanDemarr’s 45 years in music. CASEY JARMAN. Secret Society Lounge, 116 NE Russell St. 7 pm. $5. All ages.

Cold Hard Ground

[BLUEGRASS] Contributing to Portland’s apparent goal of hosting more bluegrass groups than a decade’s worth of A Prairie Home Companion broadcasts, Cold Hard Ground stands out from the flock with a strippeddown sound replete with sweet proclamations of love. Endearing the quartet to listeners even more is CHG’s habit of playing old-school instruments like the washtub bass and hosting players who very obviously share an affection for one another. In a town where down-home boys often rely on shtick, this is a back-to-basics outfit that nails the spirit of the music. That is, they understand that bluegrass is all about bringing people together for a little warmth. AP KRYZA. White Eagle Saloon, 836 N Russell St., 282-6810.

8:30 pm. Free. 21+.

THURSDAY, FEB. 9 John Gorka, Rose Cousins

[FOLK SINGER-SONGWRITER] John Gorka has been visiting Portland for 20 years now. Fortunately or unfortunately, the singer-songwriter hasn’t become big enough in the music biz to “graduate” to really large venues. The singer has the look and velvety baritone of Portland’s Craig Carothers, and shares a wry wit as well. His sets mix occasionally sillyish tunes (dispelling myths about his home state of New Jersey, for example) with short stories in song, usually personal ones. But when it comes to good old-fashioned songs of heartbreak, Gorka delivers the goods as well (“Won’t you please let me hate you now/ So I don’t fall for you again,” he sings on “Armed With a Broken Heart”). You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll remember how good it feels to have someone put words to your feelings better than you can.

DAN DEPREZ. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 8 pm. $15. Minors must be accompanied by a parent or guardian. All ages.

Wax Fingers, Sun Angle, Glass Knees

[EXPRESSWAY TO YR SOUL] Updating prog rock for the Animal Collective generation, the songs of Portland’s Wax Fingers don’t stay in one place too long. Guitar riffs flutter up, down and around time-signature-twisting drum patterns; swaths of synthesizers create wide-open psychedelic vistas, allowing the music to travel in several directions at once, like an M.C. Escher painting shot into outer space. It’s a masterful thing for this band to build such a fully realized world of sound with only three members. We eagerly await the followup to 2010’s self-titled debut, but really, it’s such a densely layered record, there are still things to be discovered in that album. MATTHEW SINGER. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 9 pm. $6. 21+.

Jenna Ellefson, The Druthers, Jackalope Saints

[BEDTIME BY-AND-BY] Portland’s Jenna Ellefson recorded In the Morning

in a house in Northeast Portland, but surely she had mountains and open country on her mind. The feathery, folky debut spotlights Ellefson’s breathy vocals and persistent banjo in siren songs set a century ago. Her languid voice weaves in and out of much of fellow PDX band Redwood Son’s recent work. While square and perhaps a bit too lovey-dovey, Ellefson’s sound deserves credit for its tight frame and focus. There’s nothing new here, but then the most comfortable things are usually the most broken in. MARK STOCK. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 8 pm. $8. 21+.

PROFILE JULIA OLIVER

MUSIC

Black Pussy

See album review, page 34. Music Millennium, 3158 E Burnside St., 2318926. 6 pm. Free. All ages.

YACHT, Jeffrey Jerusalem

[PORTLAND’S SEX-O-LETTES] Has it really been almost a year since YACHT took us to musical Shangri-La and three since it invited us to See Mystery Lights? I ask simply because it seems like yesterday that both of those albums were dropped on an unsuspecting public and on the lovingly lit dance floors of the world. That is a testament to how well Jona Bechtolt and Claire Evans have captured the steely pulse of modern electronic dance music by way of throwback disco pop and German motorik rock. And in a live setting—with a talented live band in tow—the whole caboodle sweats and throbs deliciously. ROBERT HAM. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 8 pm. $13. All ages.

FRIDAY, FEB. 10 Motley Crude, The Lordy Lords, Thornes, Iron Lords, Bitch School

[SLEAZE ROCK] Tonight is a celebration of dirt, sex, sweat and volume.

Here are the local rock bands that retain an element of danger, weaving 4/4 tapestries of filth in Portland basements and garages. The Lordy Lords have a swagger that blurs the lines between punk and rock, wearing a reverence for the New York Dolls on its rolled-up sleeves. Motley Crude pays tribute to the early work of Mick Mars and those other guys. And though there’s no way to tell for certain, I sincerely hope Bitch School covers Spinal Tap. At the least, the name comes from a latter-era Tap title. And if you object to their use of the word “bitch,” remember, “there’s nothing wrong with being sexy.” NATHAN CARSON. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., 226-6630.

9 pm. $5. 21+.

Ace Enders (The Early November), Anthony Raneri (Bayside), Chris Conley (Saves the Day), Evan Weiss (Into It. Over It.), Matt Pryor (The Get Up Kids)

[EMO MANS, SANS BANDS] Fans of the Early November have been relegated to a decadelong, on-again, offagain love affair with the group’s lead songwriter—Arthur “Ace” Enders. After 2005 breakout album The Room’s Too Cold, the Early November found itself in a select group of Warped Tour strivers that had an honest shot at mainstream success. But while Fall Out Boy would soon be rubbing elbows with Diddy, the Early November peaked at a respectable No. 31 on the Billboard Top 200, then dissipated into a series of side projects. Enders has invested these offshoots with a frustratingly variable degree of quality. 2011’s Gold Rush, from Enders’ I Can Make a Mess Like Nobody’s Business solo project, comes close but can’t quite conjure the swelling momentum that made the Early November an above-average diversion. SHANE DANAHER. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 2319663. 9 pm. $14 advance, $16 day of show. 21+.

Digital Leather, Therapists, Fine Pets

[SYNTH-PUNK SADNESS] Conceived during Digital Leather mastermind Shawn Foree’s three-month stint in Berlin, which is where pop music goes to get incredibly dour and deranged,

CONT. on page 32

DRUNKEN PRAYER FRIDAY, FEB. 10 Tom Waits gives great advice—if you can understand what he’s saying.

[RELUCTANT POP] When it comes to sagelike figures in rock ’n’ roll, few give off the aura of a bourbon-drunk Dalai Lama more than Tom Waits. Morgan Geer knows this personally. In 2006, when the rootsy 38-year-old songwriter was living on his dad’s farm in Northern California, Waits, who lived nearby, came into the bookstore where Geer worked. They struck up a brief conversation; Waits recommended a gospel album, while Geer sold him a book about rats. Soon after, Geer encountered Waits again, at a local fish market. It was close enough in time to their previous meeting that Waits actually remembered him.

“You haven’t lived until you’ve heard your name come out of his mouth,” Geer says over midday burgers and wine at North Portland’s Bar Bar. That second time around, he and Waits spoke for over an hour. It was a transitional period in Geer’s life, having just left his hometown of Asheville, N.C., in search of inspiration, and he admits to mining Waits for wisdom. “I was at a real crossroads,” he says. “I was out of the creative rut I was in, but once you get out of the safety zone of that rut, it’s like, well, now what do you do? I talked to him and he was like, ‘Well, everything. Don’t put a fence around that property.’”

Geer left the conversation determined to find his artistic voice.

He wound up finding it in Portland.

Growing up in the South, Geer felt chained to the region’s deep musical history: If he wasn’t playing the blues, no one wanted to hear it. In Portland, a city he knew little about before moving to, the burden of expectation lifted. He was free to roam around and explore within himself. The result of that exploration is Into the Missionfield, his second album under the name Drunken Prayer.

Although he now splits time between the Pacific Northwest and the South, Geer says the record is “a reflection of someone who’s been in Portland awhile.” That doesn’t mean what you might think.

Geer, tall and burly with an oil-black beard and a look more trucker than indie rocker, didn’t suddenly start wearing skinny jeans and playing a synthesizer. He did, however, find himself being challenged by the many songwriters now surrounding him. Competition, it turns out, is exactly what he was looking for.

“I wanted to get my ass handed to me creatively,” he says.

Taking Waits’ advice, Geer didn’t allow himself to be fenced in by his own predilections. For Missionfield, he experimented with different chord changes, different phrasings, different subject matter. Most of all, he learned to not be “afraid to do things that were either transparently personal or bafflingly obtuse,” he says.

The music is rooted in country and folk (Geer bristles at the term “Americana”), but it’s not beholden to any particular genre. If anything, the tone—dark, but not without humor—is closer to the amorphous pop songwriting of Warren Zevon, Harry Nilsson and, yes, Tom Waits, which for him is a bold step forward.

“Pop music was always a dirty word as far as I was concerned,” he says. “It wasn’t until I moved here that I realized how hard it is to do, and do well.” MATTHEW SINGER. SEE IT: Drunken Prayer plays Secret Society Ballroom, 116 NE Russell St., on Friday, Feb. 10, with Matt Brown’s One Man Band and Ukeladies. 9 pm. $8 or $15 with CD. 21+.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

31

503.288.3895 info@mississippistudios.com 3939 N. Mississippi A benefit for the Village Free School

HURRY

Local music chanteuse releases a delightful country and folk inspired album with In The Morning

THE

UP

DRUTHERS

JENNA ELLEFSON

ADVENTURE GALLEY +FATHER FIGURE

+THE JACKALOPE SAINTS

WED FEB 8th $5-10 Sliding Scale

THUR FEB 9th

A Sinatra-style crooner who brings the dreamy Rat Pack back to life with classic swing and jazz

Square Peg Concerts Presents: A solo acoustic tour from Matthew Good, hailing from one of Canada’s most successful alt/rock bands

RECORD RELEASE SHOW

7:30 Doors, 8:00 Show

Nicky Croon

7:30 Doors, 8:00 Show

$6 Adv

MATTHEW

GOOD

& THE SWINGIN’ RICHARDS

+EMILY GREENE

SAT FEB 11th FRI FEB 10th

$12 Adv

$17.50 Adv

Sweet, free Valentines show

KZME Presents: Portland folk artist whose lo-fi songs reverberate with personal grace

JARAD MILES

SOLVENTS

+DOGTOOTH

SUN FEB 12th

$5 Adv

HOUNDSTOOTH

PURE BATHING CULTURE +THE SOFT HILLS

TUE FEB 14th

FREE

Come celebrate the CD release of Witch Mountain’s South of Salem

Pscychadelic jams from Portland favorites

ETERNAL TAPESTRY

WITCH MOUNTAIN SONS OF HUNS

SUN ANGLE +BLOOD BEACH

THUR FEB 16th

FREE

MRS.

PORTLAND’S

Songs from Tom Waits, Leonard Cohen, Nick Cave, and 60’s garage rock favorite The Nuggets. Plus special guest buzz band, Paradise SAT FEB 18th

$10 Adv

LET’S GET PHYSICAL with DJ BEYONDA DJ TRANS FAT AND IL CAMINO 10pm - 2am

SAT FEB 18th

AMERICAN

ROYALTY PHEASANT

NATASHA KMETO

RECORD RELEASE

SUN FEB 19th

FREE

$5 DOS

Innovative LA three piece with a genre-blend of rock swagger, electronics, and psychedelia

Jack Daniels and Abstract Earth presents:

THE GREAT +DANNY CORN

$8 Adv

Bringing out the headwarmers and Spandex, it’s aerobics night this month at Mrs.

Portland’s School of Rock presents

SCHOOL OF ROCK

+BISON BISON

FRI FEB 17th

RECORD RELEASE

+TIGER HOUSE $6 Adv TUE FEB 21st

Coming Soon:

Scan this for show info

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32

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

MUSIC

FRIDAY-MONDAY

Modern Problems finds Foree’s one-man synth-punk show wallowing in sadness and self-loathing before finding at least a little bit of cathartic joy in the pits. The album dabbles in punk intensity, New Wave glee, gothy pondering and electro noodling, but Foree never sounds unfocused. On the contrary, Modern Problems is a remarkably consistent and perceptive study of melancholy, its genre-hopping a necessary strategy for understanding the many ways life and love get all fucked up.

Digital Leather tours as a band, so let’s hope Foree’s recruits are sufficiently bummed. CHRIS STAMM. East End, 203 SE Grand Ave., 232-0056. 9 pm. Cover. 21+.

the grave to finally make a sequel to Truck Turner. AP KRYZA. Goodfoot Lounge, 2845 SE Stark St., 503-2399292. 9 pm. $8. 21+.

Jon Ransom, Mike Midlo, Cait Olds

[SINGER-SONGWRITER] Nothing ruins a solo album like heavy-handed production, which is part of the reason Jon Ransom’s sparse and lo-fi debut disc, On a Lark, works as well as it does. There are little melodic flubs and a few less-than crisp moments, but the disc—like labelmate Barry Brusseau’s A Night Goes Through before it—charms largely because of just how personal it sounds. That said, spindly opener “Blue Jay” and the rough, tropicalfeeling “I Know What Haunts You” might float a little better in concert than tunes like the more generic “Warm Bed.” A nice voice goes a long way with me, as do these raw recordings—Ransom’s off to a pretty good start. CASEY JARMAN. Record Room, 8 NE Killingsworth. 8 pm. Free. 21+.

Too Short, Steady the Boss, DJ Chill

[RAP] The last time I saw Too Short onstage—at an MC battle in Seattle—the legendary West Coast rapper made his grand entrance while sucking turkey grease from his fingers and explaining to the crowd that he didn’t get paid enough to freestyle onstage. When you’re hip-hop royalty, your “working the crowd” means showing up; and when you’re Too Short, you really just have to say the word “beeeyatch” to whip said crowd into a frenzy. That said, this stylistic innovator is perhaps the most influential figure in West Coast rap (Ice Cube and Snoop might disagree, but especially in Portland, underground heads often cite the Oakland-based Short’s work well before anything from Los Angeles) and he’s funny as hell in concert, provided you can take some misogyny in stride (let’s just say Short didn’t major in women’s studies). DJ Chill, an old-school Portland scene boss who’s currently engaged in a rare Portland beef with the younger Luck-One, kicks off the show.

CASEY JARMAN. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave. 8 pm. $25. All ages..

Bubblin: LDFD, Celoso, Gumar, Citymouth, Ben Tactic, Lincolnup

[IDM MDMA] Listening to the music of LDFD, it wouldn’t take you long to figure out that the young producer and DJ is affiliated with the SoCal-based electronic label Magical Properties. There’s a woozy, glittery sensibility here that slots perfectly alongside labelmates Tokimonsta and Daedalus. LDFD’s sound has hip-hop roots embedded deep within its core, but it’s been screwed and unhinged à la hypnogogic pop stars such as Ariel Pink and Toro Y Moi. You can bounce to it, but you’d be just as happy letting the warm waves of a psychotropic high wash over you as it plays. ROBERT HAM. Rotture, 315 SE 3rd Ave., 234-5683. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

Cover Your Hearts Five: Derby, Charmparticles, Mike Lewis, We Are Not Shadows, Dr. Theopolis, Violet Isle, more

SATURDAY, FEB. 11

[SHIMMERY POP] Charmparticles’ annual fundraiser for Ethos Music—an organization dedicated to help fill the gap in arts educa-

LeRoy Bell and His Only Friends, Tyler Stenson

[CANDLE IN THE WINGS] Emerging as a breakout star during the inaugural season of new Fox vocal competition The X Factor last fall, Edmonds, Wash., resident LeRoy Bell lasted only until the elite eight despite demonstrating fairly unique qualities among Idolatry contestants—age (60, though he appears far younger) and extraordinary prior success (a top-15 single for his own ’70s Philly Soul combo, Bell and James; a top-10 Grammy-nominated hit for Elton John in 1979; a 2003 U.K. No. 1 for a remix of another Elton John track). All of that came before the intensive televised coaching from a former Pussycat Doll, of course, but he’d carved out a nice little career leading his own adult contempo R&B troupe around the Northwest. Let’s not judge. JAY HORTON. Aladdin Theater, 3017 SE Milwaukie Ave., 234-9694. 8 pm. $25. Minors must be accompanied by a parent. All ages.

Black Pussy, Jr. Worship, Knox Harrington

See album review, page 34. Ash Street Saloon, 225 SW Ash St., 2260430. 9:30 pm. $5. 21+.

Monophonics, The Max Ribner Band

[PSYCHEDELIC FUNK] Six-piece Seattle funk outfit Monophonics has made its name, essentially, by creating a nasty score for the greatest blaxploitation movie never made. With horns wailing in unison, bass thumping, guitar singing and frontman Kelly Finnigan crooning with a velvety-smooth assertiveness, the orchestral bursts of funk evoke everyone from Sly to Curtis.

With its sophomore release, In Your Brain, in the can, the group’s touring with new material—followed, no doubt, by the ghost of Isaac Hayes, who is contemplating enlisting the group when he rises from

JASON NOCITO

friendly. sounds great. best burger. independent. musician-owned /operated

tion left by shrinking public-schools budgets—is startlingly specific. The glossy pop acts on board pay tribute not to the 1980s, but to the guiltypleasure love songs of that synthy decade (“Sister Christian” and “Girl You Know It’s True” have both made appearances in previous years).

Well-loved pristine power-pop act Derby headlines this year’s festivities, though the funky stylings of Dr. Theopolis ought to get some asses shaking and the new electro-pop outfit from Lael Alderman, We Are Not Shadows, is a group to keep your eyes on. CASEY JARMAN. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St. 8 pm. $15. All ages.

SUNDAY, FEB. 12 Jon Koonce

[SINGER-SONGWRITER] No one could have guessed that the drummer for Sleazy Pieces would morph into the kinetic frontman of powerhouse ’80s band Johnny and the Distractions. Likewise, Johnny & the D’s fans never saw blazing blues-roots guitarist Jon Koonce and the Gas Hogs coming. Voice and guitar lessons 20 years ago have paid off, with Koonce able to wail all night without injuring his pipes, and able to hold his own in a city full of great guitar-slingers. The singer’s latest project is country band One More Mile, but for the last decade or so, the singer has been slipping in low-key solo acoustic gigs. If you haven’t kept up with Koonce’s various incarnations you owe it to yourself to catch this Oregon Music Hall of Famer in singer-songwriter mode. DAN DEPREZ. McMenamins Edgefield Winery, 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale, 669-8610. 5 pm. Free. 21+.

MONDAY, FEB. 13 Uli Jon Roth, Neverawake, Earth to Ashes, Golden Ghosts

[GUITAR GOD] I’ve heard it said more than once that the holy trinity of guitar gods is Jimi Hendrix, Eddie

PRIMER

CONT. on page 34

BY A P KRYZ A

DR. DOG Formed: In Philadelphia, 1999.

Sounds like: Listening to a hardcore pop-history geek’s iPod on random after smoking a blunt.

For fans of: My Morning Jacket’s more psychedelic side, Langhorne Slim’s more rockin’ side, Fleet Foxes’ less artsy side, the Kinks’ less British side.

Latest release: This month’s Be the Void, the quintet’s sixth album, which gained buzz with the nasty, bluesy single “Lonesome” and contains some of the band’s best compositions to date.

Why you care: Dr. Dog’s appeal rests in the fact that its members don’t particularly care about being cool. These are music nerds through and through, who take everything from 1960s Brit rock to soul, gospel, roots, folk, blues, classic rock, New Wave, R&B and modern pop and wash it all into a bounding, psychedelic gloss. But unlike similarly inclined music-nerd collectives (see Yo La Tengo), Dr. Dog isn’t simply making music for record-store clerks and download junkies. Since exploding onto the scene from nowhere when guitarist Toby Leaman and drummer Scott McMicken’s homeboy Jim James enlisted the no-namers to open for My Morning Jacket in 2005, the band has gained Mach-speed momentum, hitting the Heatseekers charts and, more importantly, giving freely of its musical savvy at explosive live shows. The band’s music-nerd tunes are always fun and more than a little tripped out, but rarely cluttered. On Be the Void, the band sounds more comfortable in its oblong groove pocket, with vocalists Leaman and McMicken tempering their occasionally grating yowls as the rest of the band nests in the jagged niches of each song’s layers.

This Dog is of that rare breed that keeps learning new tricks.

SEE IT: Dr. Dog plays the Crystal Ballroom on Monday, Feb. 13, with Purling Hiss. 8 pm. $17 advance, $19 day of show. All ages.

& Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

33

MUSIC

MONDAY-TUESDAY

Van Halen and Uli Roth. While Jimi beds virgins in rock Heaven and Eddie wilts into the George Lucas of Strat-wielders, Uli languishes in cult status. He made his reputation by playing lead in the Scorpions from 1972 to ’76—a superb and under-recognized era for Germany’s greatest metal export. While Uli hasn’t contributed any serious classics since those days, he remains the heavymetal Hendrix of Germany. At long last he’s bringing his back catalog to town, as well as his instructional Sky Academy seminar and 30-fret guitar. NATHAN CARSON. Hawthorne Theatre, 3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 233-7100. 7:30 pm. $16 advance, $20 day of show. 21+.

TUESDAY, FEB. 14 Natalie Cole with the Oregon Symphony

[MERRY OLD SOUL] Caught between the daunting shadows of Nat King Cole and the Queen of Soul—her landmark ’70s albums’ blend of Aretha ardor and the balletic, slightly chilling professionalism of her father paved the way for modern R&B—Natalie Cole was already a legend when divas roamed the earth, and she’d enjoy rather a different artistic legacy today had she perished in that 1981

CONT. on page 40

ALBUM REVIEWS

BLACK PUSSY ON BLONDE (MADE IN CHINA RECORDS) [STONER ROCK] Everything you need to know about Black Pussy’s debut record can be summed up in the album’s first 10 seconds. The disc opens with the sound of a lighter flicking to life followed by the hearty bubbling of a bong hit.

A little on the nose, perhaps, but when you are sacrificing your brain cells to the altar of stoner rock, subtlety is often an innocent bystander. I mean, did you see the band’s name? OK, so the Portland group has the sex and drugs covered. How does it do on the rock ’n’ roll front? For the most part, it (ahem) scores handily. With only six songs to work with, BP—part of an instrument-swapping triumvirate of bands that includes White Orange—cut right to the chase. Guitarists Ryan McIntire and Peter Meissner hold tightly to their arsenal of diamond-hard riffs, with the occasional excursion into wah-wah heavy leads. And without the steady groove in the band’s collective hips, the drumming would qualify as Cro-Magnon. Leave it then to co-vocalists Dustin Hill and Madeline Mahrie to let their dual singing parts rub up against each other lasciviously, making even the most turgid of lyrics (the nostalgic “Indiana” relies a bit too heavily on clichéd phrases like “put the pedal to the metal”) seem downright filthy. ROBERT HAM.

ALIALUJAH CHOIR SELF-TITLED (JEALOUS BUTCHER) [VOCAL POP] Two years ago, I was pretty excited about the Alialujah Choir. A supergroup of sorts featuring Weinland’s Adam Shearer and Alia Farah alongside Norfolk & Western frontman Adam Selzer, the group’s debut show was rich with gorgeous vocal harmonies and soft-but-twisting musical arrangements usually associated with old-school groups like CSNY or the Hollies. But then, as so many new bands do, this one evaporated into its members’ busy schedules before the Alialujah Choir ever had a chance to take Portland by quiet storm.

So this debut album is the rare one that wholly deserves its “long-awaited” status. (The band’s return show will have to wait a little longer, unfortunately, due to a death in the family.) This is one of the prettiest albums to come out of Portland since A Weather—a point driven home by lyrically abstract, A Weatherish tunes like opener “Laundry Song” (which also sounds a bit like a sedated version of the Mamas and the Papas’ “California Dreamin’”) and the lovely, whisper-soft closer “Really Home.”

The Northwest has plenty of sweet-sounding folk-pop bands without much to say, but Alialujah Choir has got the full package: With these talents it’s no surprise the songs are melodically engaging (nor that they are brilliantly produced in Selzer’s capable hands), but the excellent lyricism is a bit surprising.

Songs written by committee often resort to cliché, but from the concise lyrical violence of “Bones Cracking In” to the mysterious and haunting “Closer Than I Should,” these songs function almost as well as mysterious short stories as they do as songs.

In other words, Alialujah Choir is the best possible kind of supergroup. Here’s hoping we see more of the band in the next two years than we have in the last two. CASEY JARMAN. SEE IT: Black Pussy plays the Ash Street Saloon, 225 SW Ash St., on Saturday, Feb. 11. 8 pm. $5. 21+. Alialjuah Choir’s debut disc is out Tuesday, Feb. 14.

34

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

35

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36

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

MUSIC CALENDAR = WW Pick. Highly recommended.

[FEB. 8 - 14] Ash Street Saloon

Editor: Jonathan Frochtzwajg. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at wweek.com/submitevents or (if you book a specific venue) enter your events at dbmonkey.com/wweek. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings.

Email: music@wweek.com.

For more listings, check out wweek.com.

225 SW Ash St. The Martyrs, Foxtrot

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Biddy’s Open Bluegrass Jam

Brasserie Montmartre 626 SW Park Ave. John “JB” Butler & Al Craido

Buffalo Gap Saloon

6835 SW Macadam Ave. RocktownPDX Revue, Chris Margolin

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Milo Greene, Family of the Year

Camellia Lounge

510 NW 11th Ave. Mike Prigodich Trio

Clyde’s Prime Rib

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Mesi & Bradley

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St. System & Station, The Jet Age

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Wax Fingers, Sun Angle, Glass Knees

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Nathan James Trio (9 pm); Tough Lovepyle (6 pm)

Ella Street Social Club 714 SW 20th Place The Pharmacy, The Shivas, Ghost Mom, Mythological Horses

Ford Food and Drink 2505 SE 11th Ave. W.C. Beck

Goodfoot Lounge

GOOD WILCO HUNTING: Wilco plays the Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall on Wednesday.

WED. FEB. 8 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Kenny Brown

Alberta Street Public House 1036 NE Alberta St. Open Mic

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Toshi Onizuka

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway Wilco, White Denim

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Negative-Zen, Battle Axe Massacre, The Festering

Backspace

115 NW 5th Ave. The Disliked, Faithless Saints, Secnd Best

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Henry “Hill” Kammerer

Buffalo Gap Saloon

6835 SW Macadam Ave. Nilika Remi

Camellia Lounge

510 NW 11th Ave. Open Jazz Jam with Errick Lewis and the Regiment House Band

Clyde’s Prime Rib

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Sound System

Dante’s

350 W Burnside St. Planetoid, Problem with Dragons, Tentacle Burn, Enchantress

Doug Fir Lounge 830 E Burnside St.

Los Campesinos, Parenthetical Girls

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Suburban Slim’s Blues Jam (9:30 pm); High Flyer Trio (6 pm)

Ella Street Social Club 714 SW 20th Place Pardee Shorts, Solipsist

Hawthorne Theatre

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Bury Your Horses, Chin Up Rocky, For the Life of Me, Censure, Skies Above Reason

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. EVENT 2: Claudia Meza (of Stay Calm), Shannon Steele (of Typhoon), Richard Laws (of Hosannas), Chris Cantino (of Archers), Dorian Duvall (of Onuinu), Booth Wilson (of Support Force), DJ Snakks

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant 1435 NW Flanders St. Chuck Israels Jazz Orchestra

Jade Lounge

2346 SE Ankeny St. Renee Muzquiz

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Mel Brown Quartet

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. James Dean Kindle, Morgan Geer, Lewi Longmire (9 pm); Casey Neill & The Norway Rats (6 pm)

Lents Commons

9201 SE Foster Road Open Mic

McMenamins Edgefield Winery 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Tim Connell

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Billy D

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Bitterroot

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Hurry Up, Adventure Galley, Father Figure

Mount Tabor Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Drum Circle

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Stumbleweed

Press Club

2621 SE Clinton St. Swing Papillon

Secret Society Lounge 116 NE Russell St. Turtle VanDemarr

Someday Lounge 125 NW 5th Ave. Sufenta

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. The Twangshifters, Harley Bourbon, Izzy Cox

Sundown Pub

5903 N Lombard St. Justin Rayfield, DarkAcid, Migi Artugue

Ted’s (at Berbati’s)

231 SW Ankeny St. Ronald Earl, Rap Class, Bones, Montel Spinozza, Joe Nasty, Timeboy, New Lineage

The Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

The Fenix Project Blues Jam

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. The Tomorrow People, Bubble Cats, The Small Arms

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Nothing Lasts Forever: Don Haugen, M Scott McGahan, Jonathan Christ

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd.

Shoehorn Hat Trio

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Cold Hard Ground

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar 800 NW 6th Ave. Ron Steen Trio with Cheryl Alex

THURS. FEB. 9 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel 303 SW 12th Ave. Kenny Brown

Alberta Rose Theatre

3000 NE Alberta St. John Gorka, Rose Cousins

Alberta Street Public House 1036 NE Alberta St. Effword

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Greg Wolfe Trio

Andrea’s Cha Cha Club 832 SE Grand Ave. Pilon D’Azucar Salsa Band

2845 SE Stark St. The Henhouse Prowlers, Left Coast Country

Hawthorne Theatre

Richard Cranium and the Phoreheads

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Solomon Klang (9 pm); Mo Phillips with Johnny and Jason (6 pm)

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Jenna Ellefson, The Druthers, Jackalope Saints

Mock Crest Tavern 3435 N Lombard St. Jonathan Trawick

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Lowell Mitchell and Billy Kennedy

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Daniel Ellsworth & The Great Lakes

Original Halibut’s II 2527 NE Alberta St. Terry Robb

PINTS Urban Taproom 412 NW 5th Ave. Two River’s Music

Plan B

1305 SE 8th Ave. Roak, Neskowin, Hidden Knives

Red Room

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Erik Anarchy, Dreizehn, Intentional Harrassment, Super Desu, After Everything, Danny Christ

221 NW 10th Ave. Bobby Broom and the Deep Blue Organ Trio

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Kaleido Skull, Spirit Lake, Bluejay Cub Scout

Kennedy School

5736 NE 33rd Ave. Brownish Black

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. Trick Sensei, Minty Rosa

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Kathryn Claire, The Don of Division Street (9:30 pm); Lewi Longmire Band (6 pm)

Marylhurst University

17600 Highway 43, West Linn Shirley Nannette

McMenamins Edgefield Winery 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Reggie Houston

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro

Alberta Street Public House 1036 NE Alberta St. Fanno Creek, Daniel Ellsworth & The Great Lakes (9 pm); Mikey’s Irish Jam (6:30 pm)

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Sambafeat Quartet

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Stone the Murder, Gnosis

Backspace

115 NW 5th Ave. Bear and Moose, Neighbors

Brasserie Montmartre 626 SW Park Ave. John “JB” Butler Duo

Buffalo Gap Saloon

6835 SW Macadam Ave. The Sale

Bunk Bar

510 NW 11th Ave. Kin Trio

The Blue Diamond

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

ON-Q Band

Camellia Lounge

Clyde’s Prime Rib

Dante’s

The Blue Monk

350 W Burnside St. Motley Crude, The Lordy Lords, Thornes, Iron Lords, Bitch School

Thirsty Lion

Doug Fir Lounge

Tiger Bar

317 NW Broadway Karaoke from Hell

Tonic Lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

Monoplane, A Volcano, The Eiger Sanction

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd.

Gretchen Rumbaugh, Angela Baldino Thomas, Natalie Gunn, Donna Kay Yarborough

Vancouver Brickhouse 109 W 15th St., Vancouver, Wash.

Jerome Kessinger

Vino Vixens Wine Shop & Bar 2929 SE Powell Blvd.

Michael Charles Smith

White Eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. Gabby Holt (8:30 pm); Will West & Tanner Cundy (5:30 pm)

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar 800 NW 6th Ave. Sean Holmes & Fred Stickley

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. YACHT, Lovers, Jeffrey Jerusalem

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

August Burns Red, Silverstein, Texas in July, I the Breather

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Miracles Club, Polonaise, Leech, Gemini Lion, Ecstasy DJs

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant

1435 NW Flanders St. Ed Bennett Quintet (8:30 pm); Jean-Pierre Garau (5:30 pm)

Jade Lounge

2346 SE Ankeny St. Brian Copeland Trio (8 pm); Spit and Shine (6 pm)

Jimmy Mak’s

Katie O’ Brien’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Billy Kennedy

Tapalaya

71 SW 2nd Ave. Eric John Kaiser

Hawthorne Theatre

Biddy McGraw’s

Spare Room

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

Tom Grant Jazz Jam

1503 SE 39th Ave. Michael Dean Damron

221 NW 10th Ave. Lisa Mann and Her Really Good Band

2201 N Killingsworth St. Wave Sauce

1122 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Michael Hermes (OR Music Hall of Fame scholarships benefit)

4830 NE 42nd Ave. Sam Densmore

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

Beaterville Cafe

Burgerville (Hawthorne)

8635 N Lombard St. The Autonomics, Haley Bourbon, Izzy Cox

3341 SE Belmont St. Alan Jones Jam

Jimmy Mak’s

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Jackie Green, Jabe Beyer

Slim’s Cocktail Bar

8132 SE 13th Ave. Open Mic

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant

2346 SE Ankeny St. Song Circle with Brian McGinty

Aladdin Theater

Sellwood Public House

28 NE 28th Ave. Milneburg Jazz Band

Jade Lounge

303 SW 12th Ave. Kenny Brown

1028 SE Water Ave. Priory, Norman (SXSW PDX Showcase benefit)

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

The Mid-Summer Classic, Divided by Friday, Victorian Halls, I the Mighty, Beautiful Lies, Summer Soundtrack

1435 NW Flanders St. David Watson and Jim Templeton (8:30 pm); Mark Simon (5:30 pm)

FRI. FEB. 10 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

830 E Burnside St. Ace Enders (of The Early November), Anthony Raneri (of Bayside), Chris Conley (of Saves the Day), Evan Weiss (of Into It. Over It.), Matt Pryor (of The Get Up Kids)

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. John Koonce and the Twangshifters (9 pm); Honey and the Hamdogs (6 pm)

East Burn

1800 E Burnside St. Dogtooth

East End

203 SE Grand Ave. Digital Leather, Therapists, Fine Pets , DJ Chris Hnat

Ella Street Social Club 714 SW 20th Place Branden Daniel & the Chics, The Maxines

Food for Thought Cafe 1620 SW Park Ave. Tyrants, Drats!!!, Nitebrite, DJ Tuff Gnarly

Ford Food and Drink

2505 SE 11th Ave. Nicole Campbell (8 pm); Hanz Araki & Kathryn Claire (5 pm)

Glenn & Viola Walters Cultural Arts Center 527 E Main St., Hillsboro Soundstage Rhythm Orchestra

2809 NE Sandy Blvd.

Cuntagious, Dead Giveaways, Mormon Trannys

Kells

112 SW 2nd Ave. Grafton Street

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Drew de Man & Old Custer, Ross McLeron and The World Radiant, Siren & the Sea

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. Lloyd Mitchell Canyon, Wendy & The Lost Boys

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Garcia Birthday Band (9:30 pm); Woodbrain (6 pm)

McMenamins Edgefield Winery 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Drew de Man

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Renegade Stringband

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. The BrassRoots Movement (9 pm); Brad Creel & the Reel Deel, Abram Rosenthal (6 pm)

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Nicky Croon & The Swingin’ Richards

Mock Crest Tavern 3435 N Lombard St. The Adequates

Mount Tabor Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Gimme Some Lovin’ (Blues Brothers tribute), Pulled Pork

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. The Sportin’ Lifers Trio

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Black Pussy

Nel Centro

1408 SW 6th Ave. Sam Howard

Noho’s Hawaiian Cafe 4627 NE Fremont St. Hawaiian Music

Original Halibut’s II 2527 NE Alberta St. Norman Sylvester

Plan B

1305 SE 8th Ave.

CONT. on page 38

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

37

MUSIC

CALENDAR

BAR SPOTLIGHT

East End

ROSNAPS.COM

203 SE Grand Ave. Cemetery Lust, Ace of Spades, Raptor, 40 Oz, DJ Cory Boy

Goodfoot Lounge

2845 SE Stark St. Monophonics, The Max Ribner Band

Hawthorne Hophouse 4111 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Kelsey Morris

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

1503 SE Cesar E. Chavez Ave. Ninjas with Syringes

Hawthorne Theatre

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Falling in Reverse, Oh, Sleeper, Skip the Foreplay, In Her Memory

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant

DRINK IN A BOX: A stuffed peacock roosts high on a shelf above the bar at The Box Social (3971 N Williams Ave., bxsocial.com).

It’s a bold flash of décor for a bar, yet it doesn’t seem out of place in the intimate new space by Sapphire Hotel co-owner Shannon McQuilkin. Dubbed a “drinking parlour,” the Box Social aims for jovial but sophisticated and ends up with a dash of pretension. The vibe is equally appropriate for drinks with friends or a promising early date, as congenial bartenders formulate cocktails with pomegranate drinking vinegar and burnt orange peel. They’re delicious and deceptively strong. Nibbles include the decadent (fig compote and blue cheese panino) and the nostalgic (goldfish crackers and grilled cheese sandwich with tomato soup). Happy hours in the afternoon and late night are the way to go, with house cocktails $6 and snacks $2 to $5. For a paltry sum, you can walk away as stuffed as the peacock. PENELOPE BASS.

Plew’s Brews

8409 N Lombard St. Michael Manning and the Carolina Pumpstation

Press Club

2621 SE Clinton St. The Old Yellers

Primrose & Tumbleweeds

248 E. Main St., Hillsboro Tim Trautman

Red Room

2530 NE 82nd Ave. American Roulette, Hyborian Rage, Crush Your Enemies, At the Gates, Dethroner

Refuge

116 SE Yamhill St. DJ Kai Lyn, LMC, Sistafist (art/fashion/music show)

Roseland Theater

8 NW 6th Ave. Too Short, Steady the Boss, DJ Chill

Secret Society Lounge

116 NE Russell St. Drunken Prayer, The Ukeladies, Matt Brown (9 pm); Pete Krebs and His Portland Playboys (6 pm)

Slim’s Cocktail Bar

8635 N Lombard St. PNRD, Sunshine, Mood Ring

Someday Lounge

125 NW 5th Ave. The Doo Doo Funk All Stars

The Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

The Lucy Hammond Band

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. David Ornette Cherry

Thirsty Lion

71 SW 2nd Ave. The Nutmeggers

Tiger Bar

317 NW Broadway Stepper

Tonic Lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

38

Bethany & The Hooligans, Summer Soundtrack, Open Fate

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd.

The Tony Starlight Show

Touché Restaurant and Billiards 1425 NW Glisan St. The Julian Priester/Rob Scheps Trio

Wayward Vessels, Lewi Longmire (9 pm); Leo J & The Melee, Andrew Shepard (6:30 pm)

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Toshi Onizuka Trio

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Black Pussy, Jr. Worship, Knox Harrington

Twilight Café and Bar

Backspace

Vie de Boheme

Beaterville Cafe

1420 SE Powell Blvd.

Sexxon Valdez 1530 SE 7th Ave. Carri Bella

Vino Vixens Wine Shop & Bar 2929 SE Powell Blvd.

Robbie Laws

White Eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. Lone Madrone, Adam Sweeney and the Jamboree (9:30 pm); Reverb Brothers (5:30 pm)

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar 800 NW 6th Ave. Michael Allen Harrison

SAT. FEB. 11 15th Avenue Hophouse 1517 NE Brazee St. Spodee-O’s

Action/Adventure Theater

115 NW 5th Ave. David Choi 2201 N Killingsworth St. Tiki Party

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Twisted Whistle

Brasserie Montmartre 626 SW Park Ave. Trashcan Joe (9 pm); Tablao (5:30 pm)

Buffalo Gap Saloon

6835 SW Macadam Ave. SuFenta

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Bobby Torres Ensemble

Kells

112 SW 2nd Ave. Grafton Street

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Longwood Soul Review, IOA, Sam Humans

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. 82nd & Heartache, Denver

1050 SE Clinton St. Harlowe and the Great North Woods, Petoskey, Gallop

Clyde’s Prime Rib

Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

350 W Burnside St. Ninja, Gladiators Eat Fire, Dinner for Wolves

303 SW 12th Ave. Kenny Brown

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. LeRoy Bell and His Only Friends, Tyler Stenson

Alberta Rose Theatre

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Andy Stokes

Dante’s

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Alialujah Choir, Ryan Sollee, Mike Coykendall and Carlos Forster Duo, Shelley Short

3000 NE Alberta St. Martyn Joseph, Gretchen Peters

Duff’s Garage

Alberta Street Public House

East Burn

1036 NE Alberta St.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

1635 SE 7th Ave. Radio Giants 1800 E Burnside St. DJ Gray Matter, Motherbunch

Roseland Theater

8 NW 6th Ave. The Next Big Thing Tour

Henry Hill Kammerer, Philip Guttman

Alberta Rose Theatre

Tonic Lounge

Andina

232 SW Ankeny St. Reynosa

1314 NW Glisan St. Danny Romero Trio

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. She Preaches Mayhem, The Cold Ground, Synesthesia, How to Build a Fire

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. Felim Egan

8635 N Lombard St. Problem with Dragons, Planetoid

Branx

1036 NE Alberta St. Kory Quinn & The Slaves (9 pm); Travis McDaniel (6:30 pm)

Clyde’s Prime Rib

Andina

205 NW 4th Ave. Big Pooh (of Little Brother), Raashan Ahmad, Love Loungers

Dante’s

Ash Street Saloon

The Foggy Notion

Ella Street Social Club

Crystal Ballroom

714 SW 20th Place Hazel Rickard, Elie Charpentier, Eventuals, Weather Exposed

The Crown Room

5474 NE Sandy Blvd.

Ron Steen Jazz Jam

3416 N Lombard St. Reverend Mrs., Curious Hands, Last Prick Standing, Lunar Grave

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. Bellicose Minds, Vivid Sekt, DJ Ahex (movie screening/music show)

350 W Burnside St. The Vandies

Goodfoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Moksha, Jennifer Hartswick, Peter Apfelbaum, Skerik

Jade Lounge

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Matthew Good, Emily Greene

Mock Crest Tavern 3435 N Lombard St. NoPo Mojo

Mount Tabor Theater

8105 SE 7th Ave. Alan Hagar

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Parfait

Nel Centro

1408 SW 6th Ave. Jeff Leonard

Noho’s Hawaiian Cafe 4627 NE Fremont St. Hawaiian Music

Original Halibut’s II 2527 NE Alberta St. LaRhonda Steele

Plan B

1305 SE 8th Ave. Truth Vibration, Husqvarna, Triple Sixes

Plew’s Brews

71 SW 2nd Ave. Sugarcookie

Tonic Lounge

3728 NE Sandy Blvd.

Tony Moretti (Frank Sinatra tribute)

Touché Restaurant and Billiards 1425 NW Glisan St. Kelley Shannon with Randy Porter

Trader Vic’s

1203 NW Glisan St. Xavier Tavera Band

Twilight Café and Bar 1420 SE Powell Blvd.

Mowhawk Yard, Heaven Generation, Raise the Bridges

Vino Vixens Wine Shop & Bar 2929 SE Powell Blvd.

Arthur “Fresh Air” Moore (8 pm); Blues Jam (2 pm)

White Eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. Bottlecap Boys (9:30 pm); The Student Loan (4:30 pm)

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar 800 NW 6th Ave. Tom Grant with Nancy Curtin

Winona Grange No. 271 8340 SW Seneca St., Tualatin Laurence Nugent, Cary Novotny & Danny O’Hanlon

Wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Charmparticles, Mike Lewis, On the Stairs, We Are Not Shadows, Dr. Theopolis, Violet Isle, Jaycob Van Auken, Derby (Ethos benefit)

SUN. FEB. 12

8409 N Lombard St. Northbound Rain (Grateful Dead tribute)

3 Doors Down

Primrose & Tumbleweeds

Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

248 E. Main St., Hillsboro

1429 SE 37th Ave. Dennis Hitchcox

303 SW 12th Ave.

2346 SE Ankeny St. Steve Rodin

Kells

2958 NE Glisan St. Dan Haley & Tim Acott (9:30 pm); Freak Mountain Ramblers (6 pm)

McMenamins Edgefield Winery 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Jon Koonce

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Hanz Araki & Kathryn Claire

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. The Crossettes, Time and the Bell (9 pm); Wicky Pickers (6 pm)

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Jarad Miles, Solvents, Dogtooth

Mount Tabor Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Common Kings, Kalo Roots, F.O.B., Alyssa Sivaivai

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Irish Music

NEPO 42

5403 NE 42nd Ave. Open Mic

Rontoms

600 E Burnside St. Death Songs, Ash Reiter, Nathan Baumgartner

Rotture

315 SE 3rd Ave. Cold Cave, DBC, Vice Device, DJ Ikon

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. Joe Manis Trio

The Grand Cafe

832 SE Grand Ave.

836 N Russell St. Sarah Gwen Peters, Lewi Longmire, Casey Neill

TUES. FEB. 14 Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

303 SW 12th Ave. Henry Hill Kammerer, Kris Stuart

Andina

1314 NW Glisan St. Danny Romero, Pete Krebs Trio

Ash Street Saloon

Buffalo Gap Saloon

3341 SE Belmont St. Robbie Laws Band

White Eagle Saloon

Alberta Street Public House

303 SW 12th Ave. Henry Hill Kammerer, Shoeshine Blue

The Blue Diamond

The Blue Monk

232 SW Ankeny St. Bear and Moose, Sioux Falls, Here Come Dots

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

4830 NE 42nd Ave. Erotic City

6835 SW Macadam Ave. Michele Van Kleef, West Coast Songwriters

Valentine’s

Al’s Den at the Crystal Hotel

320 SE 2nd Ave. Projections, I Am the Monster, How the West Was Won, Subverse

LaurelThirst

Mississippi Studios

White Eagle Saloon

Slim’s Cocktail Bar

Tony Starlight’s

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Z’Bumba (9 pm); Level 2 Music (6 pm); Lorna Miller Little Kids’ Jamboree (4 pm)

2929 SE Powell Blvd.

The Blueprints

MON. FEB. 13

2201 N Killingsworth St. Blow Frogz

3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

Outpost, Sol Seed

Mississippi Pizza

Vino Vixens Wine Shop & Bar

Beaterville Cafe

McMenamins Edgefield Winery

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Garcia Birthday Band

Valentine’s

116 NE Russell St. Midnight Serenaders (9 pm); Boy and Bean (6 pm)

Secret Society Lounge

112 SW 2nd Ave. Pat Buckley (9 pm); Irish Sessions (6 pm)

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

White Fang, Di Di Mau

836 N Russell St. Open Mic/Songwriter Showcase

Thirsty Lion

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Laurel Brauns

Thief Sicario, Mz Lala, Swift Tongues, Juarez, Seth, D-Lux

3000 NE Alberta St. The Perfect Angels (onehit wonders and guilty pleasures show)

2958 NE Glisan St. Jimmy Boyer Deluxe Band (9:30 pm); Tree Frogs (6 pm)

Muddy Rudder Public House

2035 NE Glisan St. Pillowfight

2530 NE 82nd Ave. Taint Misbehavin, Jack Town Road, Bring the Dead, The Cold Ground, She Preaches Mayhem, Town and the Writ

2016 NE Sandy Blvd.

Margo Tufo

2346 SE Ankeny St. Matt Zimmerman (8 pm); Alex Nicole (6 pm)

Camellia Lounge

Club 21

Red Room

Jade Lounge

Bunk Bar

510 NW 11th Ave. King Louie and Baby James

8638 N Lombard St. Anna and the Underbelly

Spare Room

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Dead Winter Carpenters, Renegade String Band, Twisted Whistle

1028 SE Water Ave. Langhorne Slim

Proper Eats Market and Cafe

1435 NW Flanders St. Art Resnick Trio (8:30 pm); Gordy Michael (5:30 pm)

LaurelThirst Faithless Saints, Secnd Best, Wetsock, Heart Full of Snakes

Bruce McCollum

1314 NW Glisan St. Pete Krebs 225 SW Ash St. Open Mic

1037 SW Broadway Natalie Cole with the Oregon Symphony 225 SW Ash St. Public Drunken Sex, Curly When Wet, Reign Pro, Mike Bars, K-Dizzy

Backspace

115 NW 5th Ave. Old Wars, Fucking Lesbian Bitches, Hugo (Punk Start My Heart showcase)

Branx

1332 W Burnside St. Dr. Dog, Purling Hiss

320 SE 2nd Ave. Abagail Williams, Chasma, Aethyrium, Reficul, Sarcalogos

Dante’s

Brasserie Montmartre

Duff’s Garage

Buffalo Gap Saloon

350 W Burnside St. Karaoke from Hell 1635 SE 7th Ave. Susie and the Sidecars

East Burn

1800 E Burnside St. The Hill Dogs

East End

626 SW Park Ave. Boy & Bean

6835 SW Macadam Ave. Open Mic with Frame by Frame and Chris Margolin

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Deer Tick

203 SE Grand Ave. Vektor, Wizard Rifle, Order of the Gash, DJ Nate C

Camellia Lounge

Ella Street Social Club

830 E Burnside St. Gary Clark Jr., White Dress

714 SW 20th Place Morgan Geer, WC Beck, John Shepski

Goodfoot Lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Open Mic

Hawthorne Theatre

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Uli Jon Roth, Neverawake, Earth to Ashes, Golden Ghosts

Jade Lounge

2346 SE Ankeny St. Jaime Leopold

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Dan Balmer Band

Kells

112 SW 2nd Ave. Pat Buckley

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. David Gerow

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St. Kung Pao Chickens (9 pm); Portland Country Underground (6 pm)

McMenamins Edgefield Winery 2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Skip vonKuske with Cellotronik

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern

10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Bob Shoemaker

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Joshua Hoke, Jesse Layne (9 pm); Mr. Ben (5 pm)

Muddy Rudder Public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Lloyd Jones

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. Deep Cuts

510 NW 11th Ave. The Ezra Weiss Quartet

Doug Fir Lounge

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Dover Weinberg Quartet (9:30 pm); Trio Bravo (6 pm)

East End

203 SE Grand Ave. Motor Throne, Cemetery Lust, Gorgon Stare, DJ Old Man Stare, DJ Thrash and Thrash

Ella Street Social Club 714 SW 20th Place Moon by You, Siren & the Sea, I Hate You Just Kidding, Jesse Layne

Goodfoot Lounge

2845 SE Stark St. Scott Law Reunion Band; Erskine, Fulero, Kleiner

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

1503 SE 39th Ave. Ruby Feathers, Brush Prairie

Hawthorne Theatre

3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Anthony Green, The Dear Hunter, Kay Kay and His Weathered Underground

Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant 1435 NW Flanders St. Jazz Jam with Carey Campbell

Jade Lounge

2346 SE Ankeny St. Rachel Rice (8 pm); Hot Club on Hawthorne (6 pm)

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown Septet with Shirley Nanette

Kells

112 SW 2nd Ave. Pat Buckley

LaurelThirst

2958 NE Glisan St.

CALENDAR Bingo (9 pm); Jackstraw (6 pm)

Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom 1332 W Burnside St. Chali 2na, DJ Rev Shines

McMenamins Edgefield Winery

2126 SW Halsey St., Troutdale Eric John Kaiser

McMenamins Rock Creek Tavern 10000 Old Cornelius Pass Road, Hillsboro Open Bluegrass Jam

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Mo Phillips with Johnny and Jason

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Houndstooth, Pure Bathing Culture, The Soft Hills

Music Millennium

3158 E Burnside St. Y La Bamba

Rontoms

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. DJs Alonzo Mourning Sickness, Freaky Outty

MUSIC

Twilight Café and Bar

1420 SE Powell Blvd.

Open Mic with The Roaming

Valentine’s

600 E Burnside St. Monarques, Radiation City, Youth, DJ Cooky Parker (Rock ‘n’ Roll Prom)

Thirsty Lion

Someday Lounge

Tiger Bar

Vino Vixens Wine Shop & Bar

Tonic Lounge

White Eagle Saloon

125 NW 5th Ave. Unicorn Domination, Ask You in Gray, Doubleplusgood, The Volt Per Octaves, The Empty

Tapalaya

28 NE 28th Ave. Reggie Houston, Janice Scroggins

The Blue Monk

3341 SE Belmont St. Grey Anne (literary reading/ music show, 8 pm); Pagan Jug Band (6:30 pm)

71 SW 2nd Ave. PX Singer-Songwriter Showcase 317 NW Broadway Erotic City 3100 NE Sandy Blvd.

Deep Cuts

Tony Starlight’s

3728 NE Sandy Blvd.

Tony Starlight, Barbara Ayars, Marianna Thielen (Dean Martin tribute)

232 SW Ankeny St. Dragging an Ox Through Water, The Bubs, May May

g n i t t Ge ary’d?

M

2929 SE Powell Blvd.

Arthur “Fresh Air” Moore

836 N Russell St. Starlight Girls, It Hugs Back, Pheasant

Wilfs Restaurant & Bar 800 NW 6th Ave. Karla Harris Trio

Trader Vic’s

Thursday, Feb 9th

john GorKa

With special Guest

1203 NW Glisan St. Xavier Tavera Band

rose cousins Satuday, Feb 11th

Martyn joseph Spare Room

DJs Tyler Tastemaker, Monster Trucks, Tramp Stamp

Star Bar

Someday Lounge

4830 NE 42nd Ave. DJ AM Gold 639 SE Morrison St. Blank Fridays

Swift Lounge

WED. FEB. 8 Ground Kontrol

511 NW Couch St. TRONix with DJ 808

Matador

1967 W Burnside St. DJ Whisker Friction

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJs Moderhead, OverCol

The Crown Room

205 NW 4th Ave. Pop-Up Club: Lions Den, DJ Nick Dean

The Whiskey Bar 31 NW 1st Ave. American Girls

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Manchester Night: DJs Bar Hopper, Selector TNTs

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Jason Urick

Tube

18 NW 3rd Ave. Tragic Magic with Kid Midnight (10 pm); DJ Sethro Tull (7 pm)

Valentine’s

232 SW Ankeny St. DJ Both Josh

FRI. FEB. 10

1932 NE Broadway DJs ATM, Hot Biology

The Crown Room

205 NW 4th Ave. City Lock: Chaach, Joe Nasty, Ben Tactic

The Foggy Notion

3416 N Lombard St. Bent: DJ Nark, Phyllis Navidad, Roy G Biv, Mr. Charming

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. DJ Horrid

The Whiskey Bar

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Family Jewels

225 SW Ash St. DJ Chill

Tube

Fez Ballroom

Tube

232 SW Ankeny St. DJ Bad Wizard

Yes and No

20 NW 3rd Ave. Death Club with DJ Entropy

THURS. FEB. 9 Fez Ballroom

Goodfoot Lounge

2845 SE Stark St. Soul Stew with DJ Aquaman

Groove Suite

440 NW Glisan St. Cock Block: PNut, The Merchettes, Rihanna Ballz vs.

Sex Logic, Miss Vixen

Ground Kontrol

316 SW 11th Ave. Shadowplay: DJs Ghoulunatic, Paradox, Horrid

511 NW Couch St. DJ Nate Carson

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. DJ Nine Inch Nilina

1001 SE Morrison St. NYC --> PDX--A Dance Party: Salvatore Principato, Morgan Geist, DJ Nathan Detroit

Rotture

315 SE 3rd Ave. I’ve Got a Hole in My Soul: DJs Beyondadoubt, Brice Nice

Saucebox

214 SW Broadway The Deep Initative

Someday Lounge

125 NW 5th Ave. Mixer: Josh Romo, Rev. Shines, Mr. Jeigh, Michael Grimes (9 pm); Davis Cleveland (4 pm)

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Jake Cheeto

Holocene

Interurban

4057 N Mississippi Ave. DJ Drew Groove

Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom 1332 W Burnside St. ‘80s Video Dance Attack

Mount Tabor Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Free Up Fridays: Soljah Sound, Small Axe Sound, XACT Change Hi-Fi, Jagga Culture

Palace of Industry 5426 N Gay Ave. Lord Smithingham

Rotture

Swift Lounge

315 SE 3rd Ave. Live and Direct: Rev Shines, Slimkid3, DJ Nature

The Crown Room

927 SE Morrison St. DJ HazMatt

1932 NE Broadway DJ Sknny Mrcls 205 NW 4th Ave. The Disco: Evil One, Doc Adam, Tyler Tastemaker

Sassy’s Bar and Grill

Saucebox

214 SW Broadway DJs Coulter, Lionsden

Swift Lounge

1932 NE Broadway DJ Nick Fury

Ted’s (at Berbati’s) 231 SW Ankeny St. DJs Shaka, Danni

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. DJs Entropy, MisPrid

1465 NE Prescott St. Robert Ham 18 NW 3rd Ave. No Hands: Yo Huckleberry, Chi Duly (10 pm); DJ Neil Blender (7 pm)

Valentine’s

232 SW Ankeny St. Plaid Dudes, DJ “Chains” Crumley, Kid Midnight

SAT. FEB. 11 Beauty Bar

111 SW Ash St. Body Language with DJ Nature

Branx

320 SE 2nd Ave. Sweethearts 4: The Martin Brothers, The Milez, Mason Roberts, Merchants of...

Fez Ballroom

316 SW 11th Ave. Popvideo with DJ Gigahurtz

Holocene

1001 SE Morrison St. Buck and Bounce: DJ Beyondadoubt, Brice Nice

Mount Tabor Theater

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

Stahlwerks with DJ Non

Palace of Industry 5426 N Gay Ave. DJ AM Gold

Refuge

116 SE Yamhill St. Mark Farina, DJ Sappho, Mr. Wu, Mercedes

Rotture

315 SE 3rd Ave. Bubblin: LDFD, Celoso, Gumar, Citymouth, Ben Tactic, Lincolnup

Saucebox

214 SW Broadway

Gretchen peters Sunday, Feb 12th

one hit Wonders & Guilty pleasures valentine cabaret

featurinG

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Lord Smithingham

Tube

Tiga

Valentine’s

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Uriah Creep

Tiger Bar

Ash Street Saloon

316 SW 11th Ave. Decadent ‘80s: DJ Non, Jason Wann; Rewind with Phonographix DJs

Star Bar

31 NW 1st Ave. Recess: Ill Esha, Plumblyne, Cory O, Hoot

Tiga

18 NW 3rd Ave. Paint It Black (10 pm); DJ Loyd Depriest (7 pm)

125 NW 5th Ave. DJ Quarry, SHK THT, DJ Tyler Tastemaker, Photon!

317 NW Broadway DJ Produce

the perfect anGels Tuesday, Feb 14th

18 NW 3rd Ave. Mirror Dinner: DJs Nick Dean, Stray (10 pm); Saturdazed: DJs GH, Czief Xenith (7 pm)

Valentine’s

232 SW Ankeny St. DJ Copy

SUN. FEB. 12 Matador

1967 W Burnside St. Next Big Thing with Donny Don’t

The Lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Dennis Dread

Tube

Friday, Feb 17th

18 NW 3rd Ave. Honky Tonk Happy Hour with Tennessee Tim

MON. FEB. 13 Saucebox

214 SW Broadway Joe Nasty, Barisone

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Little Axe

Tube

18 NW 3rd Ave. DJ Toilet Love

TUES. FEB. 14 Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. DJ Hairfarmer

The Crown Room

205 NW 4th Ave. See You Next Tuesday: AKA, Keys v. Matt Rock

Tiga

1465 NE Prescott St. Tiny Vinyl

too sliM &

the taildraGGers With

lloyd jones

Saturday, Feb 18th

LIVE WIRE

ian KarMel, blitzen trapper, & seattle's hey Marseilles Coming Soon

02/19 - Keys To The Rose All Star Piano Concert 02/21 - Zydeco Mardi Gras 02/25 - Myshkin’s Ruby Warblers CD Release 03/01 - Ellis Paul • Peyton Tochterman

Alberta Rose Theatre (503) 764-4131 3000 NE Alberta AlbertaRoseTheatre.com

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

39

MUSIC

Never a cover!

pg

TUESDAY SCOTT ALARIO

Since 1974

13 topless bartenders & 80 dancers each week!

50

Buffalo gap Wednesday, february 8th • 9pm

local artist Showcase

Open Every Day 11am to 2:30am www.CasaDiablo.com (503) 222-6600 • 2839 NW St. Helens Rd

T hursday, february 9th • 9pm

RocktownpDX Revue Hosted By: Chris Margolin

WELLNESS

friday, february 10th • 9pm

The Sale (folk soul)

MODEL CITIZENS: Deer Tick plays Bunk Bar on Tuesday, Feb. 14.

D A V I D F LY N N

Saturday, february 11th • 9pm

Sufenta

Thursday Feb. 9

(folk pop)

FUNK/REGGAE/JAM with: LUAU CINDER, ADAM KING

Sunday, february 12th • 6pm

West Coast Songwriters Competition

8pm • 21+ in the ConCert hall.

Friday Feb. 10 Integrating Swedish, deep tissue and stretching for a truly great massage experience.

A BLUES BROTHERS TRIBUTE with:

503.775.4755

- ARRIVING IN THEIR OWN BLUES MOBILE!

for more info, CheCk out massage

8pm • 21+ in the ConCert hall

T uesday, february 14th • 9pm

open Mic Night WIN $50!!!

Hosted By: Scott gallegos 6835 SW Macadam Ave | John’s Landing

LMT#11142

page 51

GIMMIE SOME LOVIN’ PULLED PORK

DSL COMEDY OPEN MIC Hosted by BRISKET LOVE-COX

GET ‘EM ON SALE

FREEUP FRIDAYS

DR DO DOG

DJS SPINNING REGGAE/ DUB/DANCEHALL AND MORE

Be The Void

$12.95-cd/$15.95-lp

Be The Void is a staggering burst of rock ‘n’ roll that evolved from the raw energy of the band’s live shows.

10:30pm • Free!

21+ in the SideShow lounge Saturday Feb. 11

ROOTS ROCK, AMERICANA & BLUEGRASS with:

SHARON VAN ETTEN TTEN

Tramp

$12.95-cd/$15.95-lp

DEAD WINTER CARPENTERS RENEGADE STRING BAND TWISTED WHISTLE

Van Etten’s emotional songwriting takes a lush turn on this new release, with Wye Oak’s Jenn Wasner and Beirut’s Zach Condon guesting.

9pm • 21+ in the ConCert hall

GOTYE

STAHLWERKS

Making Mirrors

$12.95-cd/$13.95-lp

Already selling out shows in LA, NYC, & Portland, Gotye has a wide appeal with his soulful synth-pop and world music influence.

Sale prices good thru 2/19/12

OUT THIS WEEK:

Tim Berne • The Fray • Chick Corea/Nicolas Economu Of Montreal • Dierks Bentley • The Residents

USED NEW &s & VINYL VD CDs, D

10pm • Free!

21+ in the SideShow lounge Sunday Feb. 12

REGGAE/R&B/SOUL with: COMMON KINGS now on sale:

DOWNTOWN • 1313 W. Burnside • 503.274.0961 EASTSIDE • 1931 NE Sandy Blvd. • 503.239.7610 BEAVERTON • 3290 SW Cedar Hills Blvd. • 503.350.0907 OPEN EVERYDAY AT 9 A.M. | WWW.EVERYDAYMUSIC.COM Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

GOTH, INDUSTRIAL & HARD DANCE DJS & VIDEOS

8pm • all ageS in the ConCert hall

FOR ANY & ALL USED CDs, DVDs & VINYL

40

9pm • Free!

21+ in the SideShow lounge

ADAM WARROCK, SPEAKER MINDS, HEAVY BROTHERS, DON CARLOS, GAPPY RANKS, ELIGH & AMPLIVE, DARK FAIRY AND FANTASY BALL tickets and info

www.thetabor.com 503-360-1450

facebook.com/mttabortheater

Las Vegas Hilton fire (reportedly refusing to leave her room while on a crack binge—a 10 on the Whitney scale?). Finally embracing the family birthright makes for a heartwarming close to the biopic, we suppose, and, rare among Tin Pan Alley archivists, she doesn’t showboat vocal gymnastics nor let the Great American Songbook wear her.

Still, given her prior accomplishments, Unforgettable…With Love and Still Unforgettable seem like miserable ways to be remembered.

JAY HORTON. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 8 pm. $30-$125. 21+.

Deer Tick

[PERFECTLY MUSSED ROCK] It can be hard, on record, to know just what Deer Tick is going for.

Last year’s Divine Providence, the Rhode Island outfit’s fourth disc, plays Frogger with its influences, sounding a bit like the Sonics on one track and Van Morrison the next; then it brings in a folky ballad and a synthy dance tune for good measure. But in concert, everything sorts itself out nicely: Deer Tick shows are about boozing real hard and singing along, and fans know every one of John McCauley’s lyrics despite the fact they slide between drunkenly profound and downright forgettable (when you’ve got a voice that sounds like Joan Jett crossed with Jeff Magnum, I guess you don’t have to be Dylan). Warts and all, it’s hard to deny that Deer Tick is one of the finest live acts on the indie-rock circuit—and Bunk Bar should suit the rowdy group just fine as a backdrop. CASEY JARMAN. Bunk Bar, 1028 SE Water Ave., 894-9708. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

Ruby Feathers, Brush Prairie

[SWEETHEARTS OF THE RODEO] Whether celebrating cupid’s favorite holiday or the 153rd anniversary of Oregon’s birth, the Hawthorne Theatre offers a romantic aesthetic and a little flavor of the Old West this evening as Brush Prairie and Ruby Feathers anchor a Valentine’s Day social replete with cuddleworthy horse operas shown early, a photo booth, cards to share, and the streamers-’n’-hearts motif from all the finest Western-themed highschool dances. Of the female-led country outfits, Ruby Feathers’ psychedelia-tinged troupe has started work on its first full-length, and erstwhile Dandy Warhol Zia McCabe’s Brush Prairie recently finished its debut EP—a lightly rocking, twang-filled sampling of covers and affecting originals.

JAY HORTON. Hawthorne Theatre Lounge, 1503 SE 39th Ave., 2337100. 8 pm. Free. 21+.

Anthony Green, The Dear Hunter, Kay Kay and His Weathered Underground

[SAGA ROCK] Not many bands can do what the Mars Volta does.

Sure, Rhode Island’s the Dear Hunter falls short in the prog-rock department, but the band does dream up some pretty enticing symphonic hard rock in the vein of Muse. The band had the stones to release a 36-song, 2½-hour opus last fall titled The Color Spectrum, a big reason why it’s playing Coachella later this spring.

Every track on the record is a wide-reaching ballad, severely dramatic thanks to the band’s taste for symphonic tangents. Circa Survive brainchild Anthony Green headlines, fresh from recording a solo record of his own. MARK STOCK. Hawthorne Theatre, 3862 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 233-7100. 8 pm. $15 advance, $18 day of show.

All ages.

Chali 2na, Miss Erica Dee

[THE VOICE] Rakim is always going to be hip-hop’s “voice of God,” but Chali 2na actually has God’s timbre. In much-missed L.A. throwback rap crew Jurassic 5, five of the group’s six MCs (yeah, somebody made a typo) all sort of blended together, making 2na’s buttery-smooth baritone even more distinctive. It wasn’t just his voice that made him stand out, though: Even within the parameters of J5’s keep-it-simple aesthetic, the former Charles Stewart displayed a dexterity on the mic his bandmates couldn’t match.

No surprise, then, that the group split in 2007, citing “musical differences.” Since then, 2na’s dropped two mixtapes and an official album (2009’s Fish Outta Water), on which he’s expanded his sonic palette beyond traditionalist hip-hop to include bits of reggae, house and—on the Rusko collabo “Gadget GoGo”—even dubstep.

MATTHEW SINGER. Lola’s Room at the Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 8 pm. $16 advance, $18 day of show. 21+.

Houndstooth, Pure Bathing Culture, The Soft Hills

[SLOW POP] Tonight’s show is officially a release party for Seattle quartet the Soft Hills’ debut album, The Bird is Coming Down to Earth, but the band’s accompanying acts allow the evening to also function as an unofficial showcase of the Northwest’s growing cabal of midtempo indie-rock workmen.

Houndstooth and Pure Bathing Culture have both carved healthy homes for themselves in the woods of nostalgia-minded rock, and it appears that that verdure is still fertile enough to allow room for the Soft Hills. The quartet plays a slow-burning brand of psychedelic folk that never rises in tempo above a canter, choosing instead to focus on its remarkable depths of texture. SHANE DANAHER. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 9 pm.

Free. 21+.

Feb. 8-14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead.

Editor: Ben Waterhouse. Stage: ben waterhouse (bwaterhouse@wweek. com). Classical: Brett Campbell (bcampbell@wweek.com). Dance: Heather Wisner (dance@wweek.com). TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to: bwaterhouse@wweek.com.

THEATER 13

Staged! presents Jason Robert Brown’s 2007 musical about a 13-yearold dealing with the awkwardness of moving from New York to Indiana, performed by a cast of 13 young actors.

Sanctuary at Sandy Plaza, 1785 NE Sandy Blvd., 971-322-5723. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and Monday, Feb. 13; 2 pm Sundays. Closes Feb. 25. $18$24.

Baba Yaga

Tears of Joy presents a puppet play about the witch in the chicken-legged house, with music by Richard E. Moore. Winningstad Theatre, Portland Center for the Performing Arts, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-0557. 11 am Saturday, 2 and 4 pm Sunday, Feb. 11-12. $17-$20.

Beauty and the Beast

Disney Theatrical’s unstoppably cheery juggernaut rolls through town thanks to Fred Meyer Broadway Across America Portland. Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St., 241-1802. 7:30 pm Tuesday-Friday, 2 and 7:30 pm Saturday, 1 and 6:30 pm Sunday, Feb. 14-19. $21-$63, plus fees.

Boleros for the Disenchanted

Miracle Theatre presents a drama by José Rivera (who wrote the screenplay for The Motorcycle Diaries) about a Puerto Rican immigrant in New York whose world is shaken by an angelic visit. Miracle Theatre, 525 SE Stark St., 236-7253. 7:30 pm Thursdays, 8 pm Fridays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays through March 3. $15-$30.

Bunkin’ With You in the Afterlife

[NEW REVIEW] Lesbian cowgirls have been enticing audiences since Tom Robbins penned Even Cowgirls Get the Blues in 1990. BroadArts’ new show ups the ante by featuring six singing lesbian cowgirls trekking around Southern Oregon. The traveling cowpokes talk and sing about coming out, finding spirituality and meeting their partners while the others act out the stories and sing backup. Much of this feels like listening in on a gay slumber party, and the zeal with which the actresses tackle these mimed scenes can be tiresome to watch. The show is saved by a few good voices, and an entertaining dynamic between Jan (Jean Hiebert) and her Texan aunt Zet (Mollie Hart). The original music by Adam Brock and Melinda E. Pittman (with clever lyrics by playwright Jody Seay) is pretty good—the best bits are the eponymous “Bunkin’ With You in the Afterlife” and a duet titled “The Boy I Fell in Love With Is a Girl.”

There’s also a few riffs on popular songs, as with the rewrite of “Love Potion No. 9” into a lament about Oregon ballot Measure 9. Beneath the silly hijinks, there’s an unexpectedly moving heart to the piece, in the story of a woman who is held hostage by the memory of a hate crime. Women who love women and talking about spirituality will enjoy this musical, but don’t expect to see a lot of smooching going on. These cowgirls are too busy singing. MARIANNA HANE WILES. Ethos/IFCC, 5340 N Interstate Ave., 288-5181. 8 pm Fridays and Saturdays through March 10. $8-$10.

Circle Mirror Transformation

Artists Rep presents Annie Baker’s Obie-winning comedy about five strangers who enroll in a community-center drama class and wind up revealing each others’ darkest secrets.

Fun! Awkward! Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 2411278. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Saturdays, 2 and 7:30 pm Sundays. Closes March 11. $20-$50.

The Complete Works of William Shakespeare [Abridged]

Likely aware that the universe will implode should we go more than 12 months without a production of this West End chestnut, Post5 Theatre has valiantly taken upon itself the burden of summarizing 37 plays in two hours.

Eat Art Theater, 850 NE 81st Ave., 548-4096. 7 pm Thursdays-Sundays through Feb. 25. Free.

A Date With Destiny

“Tales of vampires, hijackers and hostages” from the Portland Storytellers Guild. Kennedy School Community Room, 5736 NE 33rd Ave. 7 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. $5.

Deadly Murder

Lakewood Theatre presents a thriller by David Foley: A wealthy Manhattanite (Camille Dargus) picks up a waiter (Ty Boice) for the evening, but when he won’t leave her apartment, she calls in her security guard (Leif Norby) to throw him out. Intrigue ensues.

Lakewood Center for the Arts, 368 S State St., Lake Oswego, 635-3901. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays through Feb. 19. $28, $25 seniors.

A Dose of Reality

Well Arts presents a performance written by participants in a writing course at Hollywood Senior Center.

Hollywood Senior Center, 1820 NE 40th Ave., 459-4500. 8 pm Fridays, 3 pm Saturdays. $10.

For Better

Hillsboro Artists Regional Theatre presents a comedy by Eric Coble about a pair of globe-trotting sweethearts struggling to put together a wedding despite never being in the same city. Hillsboro Artists’ Regional Theatre, 185 SE Washington St., Hillsboro, 693-7815. 7:30 pm FridaysSaturdays, 2 pm Sundays through Feb. 26. $12-$14.

GGG: Dominatrix for Dummies

Eleanor O’Brien presents a fleshed-out version of her one-woman show about her time working in a BDSM dungeon in New York. Theater! Theatre!, 3430 SE Belmont St., dancenakedproductions.com. 8 pm Friday-Tuesday, Feb. 10-14, and Thursdays-Sundays Feb. 16-19 and 23-26. $15-$20.

Grand Guignol 4: Psychosis

The Grand Guignol was a Parisian French theater that reveled in the kind of horror you’re not supposed to like but do. The fourth installment of Third Eye Theatre’s experiment with the genre features eye gouging, the mentally disabled and a guy who thinks he’s a glass of orange juice. The four acts in the production don’t exactly inspire fear, but the venue, the Kenton Masonic Lodge, is just secluded and creepy enough to make any performance feel like a stroll through your dead grandmother’s house. The “stage”—actually the floor of the lodge’s huge ballroom—has sparse, improvised seating that would make you feel isolated if it weren’t for all the awkwardness in the room. The performers are zany, and the show is, at times, interactive. So your real fear is of what these crazy people might do to you out here in Kenton. AARON SPENCER. Kenton Masonic Lodge, 8130 N Denver Ave., 970-8874. 8 pm Friday-Saturday, 7 pm Sunday, Feb. 10-12. $12-$15.

Hairspray

Tracy Turnblad dances the racism away in Milwaukie with New Century Players. Rex Putnam High School Auditorium, 4950 SE Roethe Road, Milwaukie, 367-2620. 8 pm ThursdaysSaturdays, 2 pm Sundays through Feb. 19. $10-$15 at newcenturyplayers.org.

patrick weishampel

Performance

(I Am Still) The Duchess of Malfi

Joseph Fisher’s ebulliently sordid play is less an updating of John Webster’s Jacobean revenge drama Duchess of Malfi than it is a romp in its macabre sandbox. The plot and characters have been jumbled and streamlined into a violently dissonant two-act that winkingly borrows tropes from camp and noir. Thus, the title amounts to an interesting bit of sport on the play’s identity; it, like the titular duchess, slyly insists on remaining itself. The widowed duchess of Malfi (Sara Catherine Wheatley) is forbidden ever to remarry by her two brothers, the insane Ferdinand (Jake Street) and the sociopathic cardinal (Todd van Voris, in a beautifully deadpan performance), but nonetheless secretly marries her poised steward, Antonio (Vin Shambry). Retribution ensues. In Fisher’s take, Bosola (Chris Murray), the instrument of that retribution, is reimagined as a wisecracking, immoral war vet with posturing straight out of The Wild One; the duchess vamps like a celebutante; and once-stolid confidant Delio (Nicholas Hongola) is recast as a comic, dandified Perez Hilton figure in cahoots with the audience. In director Jon Kretzu and set designer Daniel Meeker’s staging, the duchy of Amalfi is a steampunk assemblage of Gothic past and present, where a church and a discotheque amount to essentially the same thing—red, black, white and flickering light. The play’s second act tilts more serious—the punch line comes first and the fall second, in the old Italian style—and here only some of the characters survive, literally and figuratively. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 241-1278. 7:30 pm WednesdaySaturday, 2 and 7:30 pm Sunday, Feb. 8-12. $25-$50, $20 students.

The Magic School Bus Live: The Climate Challenge

Oregon Children’s Theatre sends Ms. Frizzle and the gang around the world to learn about global climate change.

Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 228-9571. 2 and 5 pm Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays. Closes Feb. 19. $13-$30.

NT Live: Travelling Light

The latest in the National Theatre Live series is Nicholas Wright’s play about an Eastern European lad who discovers the cinema and becomes a director. World Trade Center Theater, 121 SW Salmon St., 235-1101. 1 and 5 pm Sunday, Feb. 12; 2 and 7 pm Saturday, Feb. 25. $15-20.

Orphans

New company Offshoot Theatre presents Kyle Kessler’s drama about a pair of adult orphans, the younger of whom has been convinced by the criminal elder that he must never leave the house, lest he die of an allergic reaction. The Hostess, 538 SE Ash St., 224-8499. 7:30 pm Fridays-Saturdays, 2:30 pm Sundays through Feb. 26. $15.

Pump Boys and Dinettes

[NEW REVIEW] The title of this musical revue made me think I was going to see a hypersexual version of Grease. So imagine the glee draining from my face as I realized the show is actually more like something your parents would take you to see at Dollywood. As it turns out, a “pump boy” is a mechanic, and the average age of the patrons at this show is about 65. There’s very little drama to be found here, with just two or three lines of setup dialogue followed by a musical ditty involving banging on pots, light tap dancing and jokes about fishing. I’m not saying the show is bad—the performers are really talented, and the set design is delightful, as is the pie served at intermission. But I’d put this one under “Plays to Take Your Mother To.” AARON SPENCER. Broadway Rose New Stage Theatre, 12850 SW Grant Ave., Tigard, 6205262. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays. Closes March 4. $20-$40.

Rapunzel Uncut!

[NEW REVIEW] This reinvention of Rapunzel at Northwest Children’s Theater is a lot like the recent Disney movie Tangled—a modern twist on a

shakespeare’s amazing cymbeline classic. Written by brothers James and Richard E. Moore, Rapunzel Uncut! features a student indie-rock band that remains onstage throughout the show.

It’s a fun idea, but the kids in the audience seemed to get more of a thrill out the cheesy physical humor than the songs, which often drowned out the vocals. The real rock star in the show is its villain, the crone. Played by a hilarious Jenny Standish Bunce, the crone is a black-sequined diva with the delivery of Kathy Griffin. My only quibble is that the writers didn’t give her a death scene. Instead, the PC police made her see the error of her ways and lovingly give Rapunzel back to her parents. Snore. AARON SPENCER. NW Neighborhood Cultural Center, 1819 NW Everett St., 222-4480. 7 pm Fridays, 2 and 6 pm Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays.

Closes Feb. 19. $15-$20. All ages.

done perfection by Brian Allard) and tracks developments after Balandash gets new neighbors: a shadow-government committee to whom Cubism is a stumbling block on the path to a society of “automation.” Peering from behind beautifully wrought commedia dell’arte masks, They’s characters pinball in dialogue from intellectual trend to intellectual trend, decimating each with vapidity and contradiction. In the end, only one truism (and only one of Balandash’s Picassos) is left standing: “Art is social lawlessness” and, perpetually and in all places, the law is coming to town. JONATHAN FROCHTZWAJG. The Back Door Theater, 4319 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 236-8734. 8 pm Thursday-Saturdays through Feb. 18. $15.

Sense and Sensibility

The Working Theatre Collective stages lots of sexy short plays. Madison’s East Wing, 1125 SE Madison St., theworkingtheatrecollective.wordpress.com. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday and Tuesday, Feb. 9-11 and 14. $10-$15 Feb. 9-10, $30 (includes dinner) Feb. 11 and 14.

Magenta Theater does Austen in Vancouver. Magenta Theater, 606 Main St., Vancouver, 360-635-4358. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 pm Sundays through Feb. 25. $12-$15.

Shakespeare’s Amazing Cymbeline

Portland Center Stage director Chris Coleman tries to get at the heart of Shakespeare’s strange and fantastical romance about ancient kings in a stripped-down, five-actor production (featuring our own, supremely talented John San Nicolas) with original music.

Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesdays-Fridays, 2 and 7:30 pm Saturdays-Sundays.

Closes April 8. $20-$41.

Tennessee

Readers Theatre Rep reads a Romulus Linney story, backed by music and songs from Appalachia. Blackfish Gallery, 420 NW 9th Ave., 295-4997. 8 pm Friday-Saturday, Feb. 10-11. $8.

The Tell-Tale Heart

Tears of Joy gets spookier than usual in this puppet-theater adaptation of the Edgar Allan Poe classic.

Winningstad Theatre, Portland Center for the Performing Arts, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-0557. 8 pm FridaySaturday, Feb. 10-11. $19.50-$22.50.

They

It’s no wonder Polish playwright and painter Witkacy wrote a play called They about art’s idiosyncratic, transgressive nature. The man was bounds ahead of his time, anticipating absurdist theater by a generation; “they” labeled him eccentric and denied him recognition until his death. Buck Skelton’s production of Witkacy’s 1920 work is the play’s American premiere, and it’s a shame it took so long: It’s an intriguingly strange, blackly funny piece. They’s single act unfolds in the villa of aesthete and windbag Callisto Balandash (played to over-

Twenty Erotic Shorts: Trois!

COMEDY I Heart Improv

Valentine’s-themed improv at the Brody. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 7:30 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14. $15.

Irregardless

The most memorable segment of this one-woman show from Curious Comedy founder Stacey Hallal isn’t funny and isn’t supposed to be. Well, maybe it’s a little funny. Hallal tells a story about floating in Lake Michigan, tripping on some hallucinogen and having an epiphany: Though we’re all adrift in this grandest scheme, her motivating force is joy. Happiness— how to attain it and what it even is—is a theme to which Irregardless keeps bobbing back as it eddies from monologue to video skit to comedy sketch.

It sometimes seems as if Hallal, who has a Liz Lemon-esque faux-pathetic charisma, is trying out material on the audience, and she probably is: Irregardless premiered during the Fertile Ground festival (showing through Feb. 18) as a work-in-progress.

A couple of sections feel underdone— most conspicuously a near-complete retelling of The Ten Commandments’ plot in a vaguely New York accent.

On the whole, however, Irregardless is funny, well-conceived and, for a comedy show, unexpectedly poignant.

JONATHAN FROCHTZWAJG. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm FridaysSaturdays through Feb. 18. $12-$15.

cont. on page 42

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

41

PERFORMANCE

FEB. 8-14 CHRISTOPHER PEDDECORD

Late Night Action with Alex Falcone

Action/Adventure, the folks behind Fall of the House, move to fill the hole in our hearts left by Ed Forman’s move to L.A. with a new live talk show featuring local luminaries, bands and comedians, hosted by Alex Falcone. Action/ Adventure Theater, 1050 SE Clinton St., 380-8679. 8 pm FridaysSaturdays through Feb. 18. $7.

Triad

The Brody presents double-headers of improv trios. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 7:30 and 9:30 pm Saturdays through March 3. $8-$10.

UTV

The Unscriptables perform improvised spoofs of TV shows and commercials. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave., theunscriptables.com. 8 pm Saturdays through Feb. 11. “Pay what you want.” 21+.

The Weekly Recurring Humor Night

Mark

Farina (APT, Great Lakes)

A comedy showcase featuring Travis Jones, Adam Dahl, Marcia Belsky and Mandie Allietta, hosted by Jimmy Newstetter. Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd., 238-0543.

9:30 pm Wednesdays. $3-$5. 21+.

CLASSICAL The Julians

Sat. Feb.11th Mercedes

(All Ours)

Dj

Big Room Sound & Interactive Lighting

Sappho

*Live Art *Live Silkscreening

(Alga-Rhythms)

Mr.

Wu

(Rythmatix)

WWeek ad 4S Pops 2/Goodman runs 2-1 & 8 21+ with ID // Pre-Sales thru EventBrite

The all-star vocal quartet offers its unexpected yet perfectly compatible mix of classics (Vaughan Williams, Barber, Debussy) and pop (Regina Spektor, Queen, Dolly Parton, Sondheim, the Beatles), all sung with real passion and appropriate style by some of Portland’s finest female classical singers, accompanied by drums, piano, violin and guitar. The Celebration Works concert features the premiere of a new setting by Portland composer Renée Favand-See of a poem by her husband, Corin, that musically reflects the sun’s seasonal cycle.

First Presbyterian Church, 1200 SW Alder St., 228-7331. 2 pm Sunday, Feb. 12. $10-$12.

Chamber Music Northwest

Groups of 10 or more save :

503-416-638

A Tribute to Benny Goodman Sat Feb 11 | 7:30 pm & Sun Feb 12 | 3 pm Jeff Tyzik, conductor

Dave Bennett, clarinet

A tribute to the King of Swing himself – the great dance band leader who launched so many careers and took jazz and swing to Carnegie Hall. Remember Let’s Dance, I Got Rhythm and Sing, Sing, Sing?

Tickets start at just $21

SPONSORED BY

Call: 503-228-1353 Click: OrSymphony.org Come in: 923 SW Washington | 10 am – 6 pm Mon – Fri

ARLENE SCHNITZER CONCERT HALL 42

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

0

Two musical revolutions were cooking in the years just before World War I: In Europe, composers led by Stravinsky and Schoenberg were exploding a century and a half of classical and romantic conventions, while on this side of the pond, it was “one of the most interesting times in American popular music,” according to Reed College music professor David Schiff. Ragtime was morphing into jazz, with the first 32-bar blues and immensely popular blues-ish foxtrot overthrowing Victorian restraint and setting the stage for a century’s worth of magnificent jazz, pop and, eventually, rock. This inventive concert juxtaposes those two upheavals.

Performed by a quintet of CMNW’s New York-based stalwarts led by clarinetist David Shifrin, and featuring the half-sung, half-spoken vocals of soprano Mary Nessinger, Schoenberg’s haunting, cabaretmeets-atonal 1912 setting of French poems, “Pierrot Lunaire,” is one of the true landmarks of modern music, a fever dream that embraces love, sex, religion, violence, crime, blasphemy and more. The concert also features a world premiere by Schiff. His new suite for the same instruments begins with arrangements of the pioneering foxtrots of the era, continues with an homage to W.C. Handy’s trailblazing 1914 “St. Louis Blues,” and concludes with a transcription of yet another cultural and musical milestone, “Castle House Rag,” by one of the most important and influential figures in music history, composer-bandleader James Reese Europe. Maurice Ravel’s vivid 1914 Piano Trio completes a fantastic program. Kaul Auditorium at Reed College, 3203 SE Woodstock Blvd., 294-6400. 7:30 pm Friday, Feb. 10. $15-$45.

SKINNER/KIRK DANCE ENSEMBLE

Mousai Remix

The new string quartet composed of Oregon Symphony regulars inaugurates yet another new classical-in-the-clubs series at the new jazz lounge. They’ll play a hearty program of one of Beethoven’s great Razumovsky quartets (Op. 59 No. 2) and Brahms’ “C-minor Quartet Op. 51 No. 1.” Donations benefit the symphony’s educational outreach program to Portland area schools. Ivories Jazz Lounge and Restaurant, 1435 NW Flanders St., 241-6514. 8 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

Donation.

Opera Theater Oregon

The cheeky company’s “Opera vs.

Cinema” series continues with a mash-up of Fritz Lang’s magnificent 1927 dystopian classic, Metropolis, accompanied by two of the city’s top classical musicians: Oregon Symphony and 45th Parallel violinist Gregory Ewer and ubiquitous pianist Douglas Schneider, who’ll improvise on themes from Verdi’s opera Aida. Sounds odd, but it worked great last time. Singer Helen Funston and harpist Kate Petak will also perform in some scenes. The show is preceded by a trivia contest, and beer and comestibles are available throughout. Mission Theater, 1624 NW Glisan St., 314-0256. 7 pm Friday, Feb. 10. $9-$12.

Oregon Chamber Players

In this kids’ concert, actor David Ogden Stiers narrates William Steig’s Roland the Minstrel Pig, with an original score commissioned from composer Matt Doran featuring tenor Dave Maier. The Audience Kazoo Orchestra will also perform.

All Saints’ Episcopal Church, 4033 SE Woodstock Blvd., 888-627-8788.

7:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. $12-$15.

Oregon Symphony

This weekend, clarinetist Dave Bennett and his quintet join the orchestra in a pops tribute to jazzclarinet master and bandleader Benny Goodman. On Valentine’s Day, Natalie Cole sings a set after the band plays music by Bernstein, Gershwin and others. Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall, 1037 SW Broadway, 228-1353. 7:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 11; 3 pm Sunday, Feb. 12; 7:30 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14. $21-$92 for Goodman, $30-$150 for Cole.

Portland Baroque Orchestra

The dazzling German recorder and flute master Matthias Maute returns and joins Baroque flute legend Janet See to perform two J.S. Bach masterpieces arranged for recorder and strings, plus works by one of Bach’s composer sons, and one of the great Baroque concertos by the most famous composer of the time, Georg Philipp Telemann. First Baptist Church, 909 SW 11th Ave., 222-6000. 7:30 pm Friday-Saturday, Feb. 10-11. $18-$49.

Portland Opera

In the title role of Madame Butterfly, Puccini’s classic tale of West cheats East, soprano Kelly Kaduce brilliantly pulls off the difficult, passive-to-powerful transformation

from a naive, 15-year-old Japanese bride of an American naval officer (who wants to “pluck the flowers of every shore”) to a tragic heroine left with the power to commit only one last brave act of self sacrifice. Kaduce’s radiant singing and restrained dignity never succumb to diva extremes. The rest of the cast—nuanced actors all—also shines, especially John Hancock as the American consul Sharpless. The Edenic 1967 garden-themed set with a gorgeous backdrop resembling a Japanese print, colorful kimonos, smart lighting design, postcard tableaux and able orchestral and choral accompaniment skillfully conducted

by Anne Manson overcome slightly languorous pacing and add up to a compelling production that should satisfy Butterfly newbies and veterans alike. BRETT CAMPBELL. Keller Auditorium, 222 SW Clay St., 241-1802. 7:30 pm Thursday and Saturday, Feb. 9 and 11. $20-$135.

Paul Roberts

The popular British pianist, one of the world’s finest interpreters (and scholars and exponents) of the music of Debussy and Ravel, returns to play a recital of their works. Lincoln Hall, Portland State University, 1620 SW Park Ave., 2281388. 4 pm Sunday, Feb. 12. $35.

DANCE Salon L’Orient

The seductive charms of belly dance are not lost on recurring bellydance showcase Salon L’Orient, which features various styles of the genre. February’s performance, dubbed “Raqs L’Amour,” is devoted to dances of love, performed by Moria Chappell of the Belly Dance Superstars; Nagasita, familiar to followers of the Wanderlust Circus; Seattle-based belly-dance and burlesque performer Fuchsia Foxxx; American tribal-style belly-dance troupe Scarlet Thistle; and so on.

Wanderlust Circus regular Noah Mickens hosts. Fez Ballroom, 316 SW 11th Ave., 221-7262. 8 pm Sunday, Feb. 12. $18-$25. 21+.

Skinner/Kirk Dance Ensemble

Two premieres and two revivals are slated for the Skinner/Kirk Dance Ensemble’s upcoming contemporary dance program. The new works include Portland choreographer Josie Moseley’s Flying Over Emptiness and an as yet untitled piece from artistic co-directors Eric Skinner and Daniel Kirk (whom you might also know as BodyVox dancers). Making a return appearance are the lovely trapeze duets One and Obstacle Allusions, an ensemble piece performed by the directors and a few BodyVox alums, and accompanied live by pianist Bill Crane. BodyVox Dance Center, 1201 NW 17th Ave., 229-0627. 7:30 pm, Thursday-Friday, Feb. 9-10, 2 and 7:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. $36-$59.

All ages.

For more Performance listings, visit

VISUAL ARTS

FEB. 8-14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

By RICHARD SPEER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual Arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: rspeer@wweek.com.

Authorized Personnel Only

Authorized Personnel Only is a ho-hum title for this gee-whiz, how’d-she-do-that? show by Daniela Repas. The latest in Chambers’ seemingly unending run of knockout conceptual shows, Repas’ installation begins with ink-and-charcoal drawings on three paper screens.

Simple enough, but here’s where the real fun begins: It’s like a life-sized stop-motion-animated cartoon.

Disjointed, disconcerting and utterly magnetic, the effect is heightened

by Todd Tawd’s eerie soundtrack, which combines ambient sound, stringed instruments and voice-over narration in different languages. The installation chronicles the Bosnianborn Repas’ assimilation into Western European and American culture. With sensitivity and finesse, it distills the poign-ance and joy of leaving one world behind to discover another. Through Feb. 25.

Chambers @ 916, 916 NW Flanders St., 227-9398.

Facture: Artists at the Forefront of Painterly Glass

When we think of painting, we think of oils, acrylics and egg tempera.

But for a sextet of artists in Bullseye’s new show, painting brings to mind a different medium: glass.

Kari Minnick, Martha Pfanschmidt, Ted Sawyer, Jeff Wallin, Abi Spring and Michael Janis all use glass to mimic the liquidity, texturality and other surface effects we normally associate with paint. Using a variety of techniques, they aim to prove glass every bit as worthy as other media to enter the pantheon of painterly media. Through Feb. 25.

Bullseye Gallery, 300 NW 13th Ave., 227-0222.

Gargantua

The floaty, woozy techno-lite music wafting from the speakers announces instantly that this is not your typical, stuffy gallery in the Pearl. No, this is the brand-new Gallery @ The Jupiter, only a few paces from ever-hip-and-happenin’ Doug Fir. The gallery comes on the scene with a strong opening show, entitled Gargantua, by Christopher St. John. In paintings such as Red Is the Sky, the artist layers scratchwork and other textural effects over luxuriant, highly saturated color.

The imagery suggests southwestern kachina figures updated with postmodern angst—reminiscent of local painter Sara Siestreem’s work before she moved to gestural abstraction. Through March 1. Gallery @ The Jupiter, 800 E Burnside St., 230-8010.

Large Inventory

At 6 feet tall and 8 feet long, Benny Fountain’s Light Filling Up a Room is a case study in what oil paint can do in the hands of a budding master.

A rhapsody of contrasts, it counterbalances a rigidly symmetrical composition with the sumptuousness of creamy impasto; it romanticizes an otherwise austerely empty room with a dreamy, pastel-color palette; it makes up for a lack of visual contrast with evocative atmospherics that transport the viewer to some gauzy, Gallic fantasia somewhere between St. Tropez, Giverny, and Montmartre. A painting worth checking out? Oui, oui! Through Feb. 25.

Froelick Gallery, 714 NW Davis St., 222-1142.

for the DISENCHANTED

BY JOSÉ RIVERA

AUTHOR OF THE SCREENPLAY “THE MOTORCYCLE DIARIES”

“Beautiful! A play that celebrates love.”

Valentine's DayDinner Dinner Valentine's Day

—THE BOSTON GLOBE

MIRACLE MAINSTA GE

• TEATRO MILAGRO • COMMUNIT Y ARTES

ONSTAGE THROUGH MARCHFebruary 3 • MILAGRO.ORG14 • 503-236-7253 Monday, 14 Monday, February

Modern Screen

Media-leery social critic Marshall McLuhan (“the medium is the message”) would probably have liked Jim Neidhart’s Modern Screen.

Neidhart has superimposed black rectangles atop newsprint-covered backgrounds: a visual representation of the void the artist sees inside the heart of much television and computer content. Apart from their forceful thematic punch, the works have much to offer in purely formal terms. The rectangles are not just flat black shapes; they crest and trough with rich texturality, their surfaces scored as if with a miniature rake. Through Feb. 25. Blackfish Gallery, 420 NW 9th Ave., 234-2634.

featuring "pillow "pillow talk" featuring talk" and other romantic dishes and other romantic dishes

Valentine’s Day Dinner please call for reservations Tuesday, February 14

pleasefeaturing call for“pillow reservations talk” and other romantic dishes

For more Visual Arts listings, visit

WWeek ad 4S Spec13/Perlman Runs: 1/29 runs 2/8, 2/15 and 2/22 please call for reservations 830 N Shaver • 503-460-3333 503-460-3333 • 830 N Shaver just east of Mississippi Ave.

REVIEWS

ALUMINUM AND NOTHING

Dinner Tuesday-Saturday; Breakfast 9am-2pm just east ofWeekend the corner

of Mississippi and Shaver

Joe Thurston is ready for the floor.

In two riveting, wildly different shows this month, one artist known for sculpture makes a jump to wall pieces while another artist known for wall pieces leaps onto the floor with a haunting series of sculptures.

First, at Laura Russo, Mel Katz’s Anodized Aluminum departs from his well-known metal sculptures and essays a suite of jaunty compositions fabricated from anodized aluminum. He makes the transition from floor to wall with wit and finesse, employing the same biomorphic shapes he’s explored over his long career. Now more than ever, Katz seems to be channeling latecareer Matisse, when the old master abandoned traditional painting in favor of buoyant gouache cutouts. Katz’s Tapestry and Gold seem to nod to Matisse’s curling, unfurling L’escargot, while his In Orbit nods to Matisse’s The Sorrows of the King.

With this dynamic, upbeat show, Katz proves that after nearly 50 years of exhibiting, he’s an artist at the top of his form.

Meanwhile, at Elizabeth Leach, Joe Thurston branches off in new directions with the somber, masterly installation, Nothing Leading Anywhere Any More Except to Nothing. The show’s existentialist title betrays its contemplative emotional tenor. Laid out in a maze of 35 wooden sculptures, the exhibition invites viewers to navigate through the rectangular monoliths, which Thurston calls “containers.” Intricately constructed despite their rough-hewn appearance, they are covered in brown paint and black drips. They look like storage crates in Charles Foster Kane’s warehouse, or oversized tombstones. In fact, each sculpture is a kind of tomb. Inside each, the artist has sealed an item of personal significance to him: a braid of hair, a pair of reading glasses, a plastic Champagne flute and a child’s signet ring. The viewer is left to wonder what stories these trinkets tell. It is an

BOLEROS

Open: 5pm; Weekend Breakfast 9am-2pm 830 N Tue.-Sun. Shaver • 503-460-3333

just east of the corner of Mississippi and Shaver Open: Tue.-Sun. 5pm; Weekend Breakfast 9am-2pm

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Plays Mendelssohn

NOTHING LEADING ANYWHERE ANY MORE EXCEPT TO NOTHING

act of detachment—a lightening of the load—to entomb, and offer for sale in a gallery, a sentimental object that once seemed indispensable. There is also something ghoulish about the act, recalling the buried-alive scenarios in Edgar Allan Poe’s The Tell-Tale Heart and The Cask of Amontillado. This is Thurston’s first exhibition since he won the prestigious Pollock-Krasner grant, and it shows a new sense of gravitas. At midcareer, he has abandoned the whimsy of his early portraits and the ebullience of his more recent gestural abstractions and seems to be embarking on a quest to answer, without flinching, life’s biggest questions: When is it time to let go of our pasts, and what awaits us in the murky fog of our futures? This is a chilling, mature, unforgettable body of work. RICHARD SPEER. SEE IT: Mel Katz’s Anodized Aluminum is showing at Laura Russo Gallery, 805 NW 21st Ave., 226-2754. Through Feb. 25. Joe Thurston’s Nothing Leading Anywhere Any More Except to Nothing shows at Elizabeth Leach, 417 NW 9th Ave., 224-0521. Through March 31.

Saturday, February 25 | 7:30 pm Carlos Kalmar, conductor • Itzhak Perlman, violin The great master returns, this time to perform Mendelssohn’s beloved violin concerto in a concert led by Music Director Carlos Kalmar.

Schubert: Overture in C, “In the Italian Style” • Mendelssohn: Violin Concerto Brahms (arr. Schoenberg): Piano Quartet in G minor

Tickets start at $35 while they last!

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FEB. 8-14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

By MARIANNA HANE WILES. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: words@wweek.com.

Fax: 243-1115.

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WEDNESDAY, FEB. 8

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Your Journey to Graduate School Begins February 25 JOIN US FOR A SPECIAL PROGRAM ON CAMPUS IN SANTA BARBARA This special One-Day Introduction on Saturday, February 25 has been designed to give prospective students a comprehensive introduction to Pacifica’s Graduate Institute’s unique educational features.

Experience Pacifica’s interdisciplinary curriculum through characteristic classroom presentations Learn about the degree programs at facultyled, program-specific information meetings Explore the Ladera Ln. & Lambert Rd. Campuses Visit the Opus Archives and Pacifica’s Bookstore Learn about admissions and financial aid Meet Pacifica alumni, faculty, staff, and other prospective students

Explore M.A. and Ph.D. Programs in Psychology, the Humanities, and Mythological Studies Space at the Feb. 25 Introduction is limited.

Register today. Call 805.969.3626, ext. 103 or register online at www.pacifica.edu The $75 registration fee for this 8:30am to 6:00pm program includes breakfast, lunch, and a $25 gift certificate good at the Pacifica Bookstore.

249 Lambert Rd., Carpinteria, CA 93013 www.pacifica.edu

The Sex Diaries Project

Forget love. The Hallmark holiday that’s nearly upon us really celebrates sex, right? Pick up an early, easily misinterpreted gift for your friend-with-benefits at Arianne Cohen’s reading. Cohen was the first editor of New York magazine’s popular “Sex Diaries” column, and she has collected some of the best real-life sex diaries for this book.

Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 228-4651. 7:30 pm. Free.

Loggernaut Reading Series

The theme for this month’s series is “Crush,” and featured readers will be Karen Karbo, Ismet Prcic and Matthew Zapruder. Ristretto Williams, 3808 N Williams Ave., 288-8667. 7:30 pm. $2 suggested donation.

SATURDAY, FEB. 11 Barbara Guest’s Collected Poems

Spare Room reading series aims to expose Portlanders to experimental poetry, and this month it’s a deluge: During the course of two days, the posthumously published The Collected Poems of Barbara Guest will be read aloud, from start to finish. The collection covers pieces written during her 45-year career. YU Contemporary describes her poems as “marked by a unique combination of audacious abstraction, vivid synesthesia and comic energy.” YU Contemporary, 800 SE 10th Ave., Portland, 236-7996.

3 pm-8 pm Saturday and Sunday, Feb. 11-12. Free.

SUNDAY, FEB. 12 Portland Poetry Slam

The Portland Poetry Slam runs every Sunday at Backspace. Each show opens with an open mic at 8 pm, followed by a featured poet, then the slam, where eight poets battle it out for $50 and poetic glory. Signups for the slam and open mic begin at 7:30 pm. RUTH BROWN. Backspace, 115 NW 5th Ave., 248-2900. 7:30 pm. $5 suggested donation. All ages.

Matt Ruff

Scan for a video on Pacifica Pacifica is accredited by the Western Association of Schools and Colleges (WASC).

44

poet Jennifer Richter. They’ve also promised an open mic to follow the reading, so stop by the Ross Island Grocery and Cafe for snacks and settle in for the show. Stonehenge Studios, 3508 SW Corbett Ave., 224-3640. 7 pm. Free.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

What if the Sept. 11 attacks had been perpetrated by Christian fundamentalists against targets in Baghdad, Riyadh and Mecca? In his new thriller, The Mirage, Matt Ruff imagines an alternative history to 9/11 that creatively investigates the relationships between America and the Middle East. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 2284651. 7:30 pm. Free.

The Studio Series

Who knew Johns Landing had its own monthly poetry reading?

February’s edition will beard aficionado B.T. Shaw and OSU visiting

Katherine Boo

Pulitzer Prize winner Katherine Boo brings her latest work of narrative nonfiction to Powell’s. She’ll be reading from Behind the Beautiful Forevers: Life, Death and Hope in a Mumbai Undercity. Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., 2284651. 7:30 pm. Free.

Drunk Poets Society

This poetry open mic takes place every Monday at the horror-themed Lovecraft bar. RUTH BROWN. The Lovecraft, 421 SE Grand Ave., 971-270-7760. 8 pm.

Free. 21+.

TUESDAY, FEB. 14 To Hell With Love

If you’re feeling bitter, this is the perfect way to share your pain.

Each month, the artistic community at Milepost 5 invites the public to join their Second Tuesday reading series, open mic in the cafe, and performance venue in the bowels of the collective.

In dishonor of Valentine’s Day, February’s guests are asked to read their writing that explores the darker side of love. Eat Art Theater, 850 NE 81st Ave., 548-4096. 7:30 pm. Free.

Ericka Huggins

For a non-traditional Valentine’s date, take your Occupier to Lewis & Clark’s Black History Month keynote lecture by Ericka Huggins, human-rights activist, poet, professor and former Black Panther leader and political prisoner. She will discuss her personal experiences with incarceration, education and the role of spiritual practice in sustaining activism and promoting change. The event will take place in the Council Chamber of the Templeton Student Center. Lewis & Clark College, 0615 SW Palatine Road, 768-7000. 7 pm. Free.

Smalldoggies Valentine’s Spectacular

Smalldoggies follows a simple recipe: Start with a great venue (The Blue Monk), add one musical guest (Grey Anne at 8 pm) and four readers (Emily Kendal Frey, Jenny Forrester, Mighty Mike McGee and Kris Saknussemm, starting at 8:30 pm). Stir. Mix. Enjoy. The Blue Monk, 3341 SE Belmont St., 595-0575. 8 pm. $5 suggested donation. 21+.

MOVIES

P O RT L A N D B A R O Q U E

FEB. 8-14

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

O R C H E S T R A

Editor: AARON MESH. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: amesh@wweek.com. Fax: 243-1115.

C A N A D I A N N AT I O N A L F I L M B O A R D

Albert Nobbs

40 The gender-bending Albert Nobbs offers a buy-one-get-onefree coupon of butch, with two central heroines masquerading as dudes. But poor Albert (Glenn Close) is so one-dimensional the film surrounding him becomes a complete and utter drag. R. PATRICIA SAUTHOFF. Fox Tower.

The Artist

64 Repressed memories drive The Artist. It’s a silent-film homage to silent films—or, rather, the fond, slightly condescending recollection of silent films. Days after seeing The Artist, I find it hard to place any individual moments that resonated (aside from some doggie heroism), and I suspect that, title aside, the movie feels a complacent cynicism toward art. PG-13. AARON MESH. Clackamas, Bridgeport, City Center, Fox Tower, St. Johns Twin CinemaPub.

Beauty and the Beast 3D

Tie your napkin ‘round your neck, cherie, and we’ll POKE YOU IN THE EYE. G. Clackamas, Bridgeport.

Big Miracle

58 About 15 minutes into the new

inspirational family film Big Miracle, an insufferable Drew Barrymore exclaims, “But this is different— whales are in danger!” I rolled my eyes so hard I almost had a seizure.

Playing a Greenpeace activist fighting to help free a family of gray whales trapped in the rapidly freezing Arctic Ocean, Barrymore oozes with maudlin sap while still managing to be an obnoxious bitch—and I like Drew Barrymore. PG. PENELOPE BASS. Clackamas, Cedar Hills, Bridgeport, Division, Evergreen.

Carnage

76 An opportunity for a quartet

of actors—Jodie Foster, John C. Reilly, Kate Winslet and Christoph Waltz—to play self-regarding louts hasn’t been grabbed with such relish since Mike Nichols made Closer. R. AARON MESH. Fox Tower.

Cascade Festival of African Films NEW

[THREE NIGHTS ONLY] The monthlong festival continues with features including Restless City (noon Thursday and 7:30 pm Friday, Feb. 9-10), a drama about a Senegalese immigrant selling bootleg CDs in New York City. Portland Community College’s Cascade Campus, Moriarty Arts and Humanities Building, Room 104, 705 N Killingsworth St. Thursday-Saturday, Feb. 9-11.

Chronicle

81 Dopey in all the right places and just mean enough to draw blood, Chronicle strings together a series of increasingly ludicrous set pieces to frequently thrilling effect, and it’s not too shabby as an all-purpose allegory for every messy thing teens get up to, either. Soon after massaging a mysterious object found in a dark hole behind a ridiculous rave—we’ve all been there—three very cute guys find themselves endowed with telekinetic powers.

Like Cloverfield, the last successful foray into man-with-a-video-camera mode, we are strapped to the shoulder of an amateur cinematographer as the ride tilts and whirls and eventually spins out of control. First-time feature director Josh Trank and cowriter Max Landis are sharp enough to know what made Cloverfield work so well: an awareness that such junk food is so much better without too much bland exposition or character development dampening the sugar rush. PG-13. CHRIS STAMM. Clackamas, Lloyd Center, Cedar Hills, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop.

THE OSCAR NOMINATED SHORT FILMS, ANIMATED: WILD LIFE

A Dangerous Method

81 “All those provocative discussions

helped crystallize a lot of my thinking,” Michael Fassbender’s Jung tells Viggo Mortensen’s Freud. And while the movie includes lots of sex and spanking, it’s chiefly about the thrills, arousals and perils of conversation. R. AARON MESH. Hollywood Theatre.

The Descendants

72 George Clooney makes the most

of his underwritten role—it is a comedic wonder to watch him lope awkwardly in flip-flops, or register his polite, pride-sucking pain over and over—but it is difficult nonetheless for the viewer to invest emotionally in the film, despite its easy charisma. R. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Clackamas, Cedar Hills, Lake Twin, Moreland, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Fox Tower.

NEW Doggie Woggiez!

Poochie Woochiez!

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] You think that title is appalling? Consider the content: It is found VHS footage of dogs assembled into an all-canine remake of Alejandro Jodorowsky’s The Holy Mountain. We do not understand how this happened, but we are the people who brought you dog valentines, so we don’t have a lot of room to criticize here. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close

15 Thomas Horn plays Oskar Schell, a nerdy 9-year-old who recently lost his beloved father (Tom Hanks) in the Sept. 11 attacks. His visions of his father’s death are like a morbid picture book that doesn’t teach you anything. You almost expect to see that dastardly airplane peeking impishly around a corner, or Rudy Giuliani. PG-13. ALISTAIR ROCKOFF. Cedar Hills, Bridgeport, City Center, Evergreen, Fox Tower.

The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo

The movie looks like somebody found the pornography stash of Steve Jobs; the snow and the torture chamber both look like they were designed by Apple. R. AARON MESH. Pioneer Place, Hilltop.

The Grey

55 Liam Neeson is working as a wolf sniper on a Yukon pipeline and thinking about shooting himself in the face when he boards the wrong charter plane home. The inevitable plane crash is extremely loud and incredibly gross. Director Joe Carnahan (Smokin’ Aces) homes his camera in tight as the doomed men give the dogs their bones.

It’s unsettling and only somewhat undermined by the dialogue, which I believe Carnahan achieved by asking a drunken child to read Jack London aloud. R. AARON MESH. Clackamas, Lloyd Center, Cedar Hills, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Fox Tower, Hilltop, St. Johns Twin Cinema-Pub.

NEW

Happy

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] A documentary from seeks the meaning of happiness. Clinton Street Theater. 7 pm Saturday, Feb. 11.

Seriously Fast Playing!



Haywire

91 Steven Soderbergh’s weapon

of choice is Gina Carano: an ultimate-fighting champion uncaged to destroy Ewan McGregor, Michael Fassbender and Antonio Banderas.

R. AARON MESH. Lloyd Center, Fox Tower.

Hugo

80 Set by Martin Scorsese in a vivid

version of 1930s Paris so edibly adorable it might as well have been born in a crocodile tear sliding down Amélie’s pristine cheek, Hugo drapes its bittersweet study of broken dreams over a plot of fairystory simplicity. PG. CHRIS STAMM. Lloyd Center, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Living Room Theaters.

“A RARE VIRTUOSITY” —The Washington Post

MATTHIAS MAUTE, recorder & JANET SEE, flute Flute - Recorder: Feb. 10, 11, 12, 2012 Remaining tickets 503.222.6000 & pbo.org

I Am Bruce Lee

[ONE WEEK ONLY] A documentary about the fighter’s legacy. Clinton Street Theater. Thursday-Thursday, Feb. 9-16.

NEW In the Land of Blood and Honey

EMAIL FOR A CHANCE TO WIN A SCREENING PASS GOOD FOR TWO TO

Angelina Jolie’s directorial debut is about Bosnian atrocities. Not screened for Portland critics. R. Fox Tower.

The Innkeepers

70 Ti West is obsessed with creat-

ing bumps in the night. But despite its splendidly gothic aesthetic and ghastly specters, The Innkeepers never transitions into full-blown fear.

R. AP KRYZA. Hollywood Theatre.

The Iron Lady

35 At least half the picture is dedicated to an elderly Margaret Thatcher (Meryl Streep) wandering through her quarters in a housedress, talking to her late husband Denis (Jim Broadbent). The Iron Lady’s failure of taste is even more incredible when you remember that Thatcher is alive. PG-13. AARON MESH. City Center, Fox Tower.

NEW Journey 2: The Mysterious Island

This Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson sequel was not shown 2: critics in time 2: meet press deadlines. PG. Clackamas, Cedar Hills, Eastport, Pioneer Place, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville.

Le Havre

60 The trademark stoicism of Aki

Kaurismäki’s heroes doesn’t translate into French bonhomie, and the project ends up feeling ruinously whimsical. AARON MESH. Living Room Theaters.

CONT. on page 48

SCREENING WILL BE HELD ON WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 15TH AT 7PM. EMAIL SEATTLERSVP@ALLIEDIM.COM WITH YOUR NAME, AGE, ZIP CODE AND RAMPART-WILLAMETTE IN THE SUBJECT LINE. ONE ENTRY PER PERSON. MULTIPLE ENTRIES WILL BE DISQUALIFIED.

THIS FILM IS RATED R. RESTRICTED. Under 17 Requires Accompanying Parent Or Adult Guardian.

Please note: Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee you a seat at the theatre. Seating is on a first come, first served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. No admittance once screening has begun. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket, and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. Millenium Entertainment, Willamette Weekly and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, recipient is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors, their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS!

IN THEATRES FEBRUARY 24TH Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

WILLAMETTE WEEK THURSDAY 2/9/12

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MOVIES

FEB. 8-14

Man on a Ledge

49 James Cameron’s Avatar play-

ALT-MOVIE S TA R WA R S U N C U T

2

ACADEMY AWARD NOMINATIONS

thing Sam Worthington, future recipient of the Tom Berenger Lifetime Achievement in Bruised Lumpiness Award, “stars” alongside a cast of fleshy hood ornaments (Kyra Sedgwick, Ed Burns, some old man who looks like Ed Harris—oh my god, that is Ed Harris) in a hacky patchwork of thriller clichés that is not not fun in the way being alive is often not not better than being dead.

PG-13. CHRIS STAMM. Bridgeport, Evergreen.

Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol

83 Brad Bird fluidly guides the

mayhem with the eye of an animator

AE: (circle one:) Artist: (circle one:) ART APPROVED and the humor of a child unleashed on a new playground. With Ghost OPB and the University of Oregon in Portland Angela Maria Josh present Heather Staci Freelance 2 Protocol he accomplishes the

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More Than a Month

unlikely by taking a stagnant franchise and molding the best action film of the year. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Mt. Hood, Evergreen.

More Than a Month

An African American filmmaker goes on a campaign to end Black History Month.

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] A black director tries to end Black History Month.

University of Oregon Turnbull Center.

6 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14.

Film@6:00 PM followed by panel and Q&A

One for the Money

by Shukree Hassan Tilghman

University of Oregon in Portland, 70 NW Couch Street turnbullcenter.uoregon.edu

Katherine Heigl, bounty hunter. Why was this not screened for critics?

Inexplicable. PG-13. Clackamas, Cedar Hills, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop.

NEW The Oscar Nominated Short Films 2012: Animated

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SHORT FILMS 2O12

84TH ANNUAL ACADEMY AWARD® NOMINEES

TWO SEPARATE PROGRAMS: BEST LIVE ACTION SHORT FILM NOMINEES PENTECOST Ireland RAJU Germany/India THE SHORE NorthernIreland TIME FREAK USA TUBA ATLANTIC Norway BEST ANIMATED SHORT FILM NOMINEES DIMANCHE/SUNDAY Canada A MORNING STROLL UK WILD LIFE Canada THE FANTASTIC FLYING BOOKS OF MR. MORRIS LESSMORE USA PIXAR’S LA LUNA USA PLUS ADDITIONAL ANIMATED SHORTS! theoscarshorts.shorts.tv

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENT STARTS FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 10

HOLLYWOOD THEATRE Portland (503) 281-4215

“OSCAR” is a trademark of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences (“A.M.P.A.S.”). This program not affiliated with A.M.P.A.S.

72 Like its live-action counterpart, this omnibus of Oscar-nominated animated shorts lacks the visionary spirit that makes bite-sized cinema sing. However, the lot is redeemed by the wonderful Wild Life, a 10-minute delight that sets an Englishman’s smug refinement against an early-20th-century Alberta (the western Canadian province, not the Portland street) that doesn’t much care for his presence.

The tactile jitteriness of the painted frames imbues the orderly compositions with a hint of unease, a gentle teeming that the narrative adopts as tragic grace. I was reminded of Wes Anderson’s way with the kind of detached sadness that is almost funny until it is most definitely not.

Pray it plays at program’s end so you have something splendid to look forward to. The other nominees are harmless larks that breeze on by and are quickly forgotten. A Morning Stroll traipses through past, present and future with a jaunty chicken, while The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore conjures a world in which books are living, breathing bipedal pets. Dimanche and its childlike morbidity is preferable to such froth, but it is a pale passing fancy next to Wild Life. CHRIS STAMM. Hollywood Theatre.

NEW The Oscar Nominated Short Films 2012: Live Action

WILLAMETTE WEEK WED 2/8 2 COL(3.772”) X 3.5” ALL.OSH.0208.WI

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Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

LT

40 There will come a time when the general public’s lack of interest in the shorts categories will embolden the Academy to honor the oddballs and risk-takers who are trying to push cinema in new and wild directions. Maybe next year?

For now, here’s to middling and inconsequential work that leaves no stains, slight stuff like Pentecost, which finds a sulking altar boy’s soccer obsession merging with his ecclesiastical duties in a way that might make grandpas chuckle. It’s not nearly as sexy as it sounds, and the punch line will fail to sting all but the most reverent genuflectors. The mercifully short Time Freak takes a promising premise—neurotic geek uses time travel to perfect interactions of little consequence—and sucks all the fun out of it, while the commercial-grade cinematography of Raju renders vapid seriousness in muted tones that should be selling Jaguars. The precious Tuba Atlantic will take home this year’s statue, as it is about a lonely old man

THE HOOVER IS STRONG WITH THIS ONE: Obi-Wan, Luke and a vacuum.

STAR WARS: UNCUT A long time ago, a USC student named George transformed his love of Buck Rogers serials, pulp novels and Japanese cinema into the greatest space-opera film of all time. Since then, he’s redecorated his Hidden Fortress with CGI furniture, patching holes in a cantina roof that never leaked. First it was the travesty of the Special Editions and their farting digital dinosaurs.

Then came the prequels and Jar Jar Binks. And now Lucas is taking further liberties with a 3-D edition of The Phantom Menace—Star Wars fans’ least-favorite entry in the franchise.

In stark contrast is the crowdsourced phenomenon of Star Wars: Uncut. In 2009, Web developer Casey Pugh began producing a fan film remake of Episode IV: A New Hope. More than a thousand teams signed on for 15-second chunks of the film, reproducing it shot by shot, and delivering their microchapters within 30 days of assignment. The often clunky, mostly imaginative results were stitched into a two-hour whole. More than 2 million viewers on YouTube have been enthralled to date.

Click your cursor to any point in Star Wars: Uncut to see Jedi children in suburban driveways, hand puppets, motion graphics, action figures, and hundreds of other no-budget techniques on display. Due to the overwhelming whiplash of styles and content, I recommend screening SW:U in 20-minute segments (unless you’re making it into a drinking game with friends). The source material is so deeply embedded in our consciousness that no matter the style or homage—nods to Bergman, Yellow Submarine and Simpsons characters abound—it’s impossible to lose your place, or your grin.

While Phantom Menace promises Ewan McGregor and Samuel L. Jackson in 3-D (at long last, right?), Star Wars: Uncut interprets the most iconic characters from the saga from a kaleidoscope of angles. A host of vacuum cleaners moonlight as R2 units. A flurry of household pet Chewbaccas pant woodenly alongside ear-muffed Leias, lady Lukes, and IT-desk Han Solos. You can even spot Portland-based filmmaker Lance Bangs as a jolly Obi-Wan Kenobi. And then there are the SUV land speeders and screensaver hyperdrives.

These are the droids you’re looking for, all there in foil and papiermâché and Adobe After Effects.

Now that YouTube allows posts longer than 10 minutes, it feels like a waste to spend $14 for diminishing rewards at the cinema on a pair of glasses you’re not allowed to keep. Hollywood is operating like the Jawas, polishing yesteryear’s goods that are broken before they reach the farm. The Uncle Owens and Aunt Berus of Middle America are getting more Web-savvy all the time. Soon they’ll see no reason to leave the homestead, when a galaxy of creative offerings can be distilled like moisture from the air. Communal filmgoing is dead. This is the age of communal filmmaking. May the force come from you. NATHAN CARSON. Greedo shot first. Han shot his own movie.

SEE IT: Star Wars: Uncut can be found at youtube.com. Star Wars: Episode I—The Phantom Menace 3D is opens Friday at Lloyd Center, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Eastport, Pioneer Place, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Sherwood, Tigard and Wilsonville.

MOVIES K E R R Y H AY E S / S M P S P

FEB. 8-14

Changing the image of rescue, one animal at a time...

THE VOW reluctantly forging a few fleeting connections before flatlining. My favorite of this year’s bunch is The Shore. Not because it moved me in any meaningful way, but because the haunted, dangerous face of Ciarán Hinds occupies so many of its otherwise uninspiring frames.

CHRIS STAMM. Hollywood Theatre.

Pina 3D

95 German auteur Wim Wenders’

Pina—an elegiac documentary about the work of late, iconoclastic choreographer Pina Bausch—is something else, a brokenhearted Billie Holiday to the 3-D form’s usual emptily virtuosic Ella Fitzgerald. PG. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Cinema 21.

NEW

Portlandia Season 2

[TV ONSCREEN] Season 1’s propensity for bad sex has thankfully not returned, but director Jonathan Krisel still ratchets up the mockheroic tension into something unrecognizable and cacophonous.

But if the payoffs are often bilious, the setups are sharp. AARON MESH. Hollywood Theatre. 10 pm Friday, Feb. 10. Mission Theater. 7 and 10 pm, with variety show “The Friday Night TV Party & Theater Club Neighborhood Association” in between.

Red Tails

45 Apparently tired of meddling

with his own history, with Red Tails, George Lucas is going ahead and fucking up actual history. The problem is not that it’s an old-fashioned action flick; frankly, if the goal was to reach a younger audience, packing the film full of whizbang aerial dogfights—which, to be honest, only look decent—is probably the best way to get its attention. The problem is, whatever attention the movie earns, it does nothing with it. PG-13. MATTHEW SINGER. Bridgeport, Division, Evergreen.

NEW

Safe House

Ryan Reynolds guards Denzel Washington in a movie we could have sworn was directed by Tony Scott but isn’t. Not screened for critics by WW press deadlines; look for a review on wweek.com.

R. Clackamas, Lloyd Center, Oak Grove, Cedar Hills, Pioneer Place, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville.

A Separation

90 A marriage is all over but the

shouting, and there’s a lot of shouting. But the movie is riveting, even exhilarating. Asghar Farhadi tracks the fallout between Simin and Nader (Leila Hatami and Peyman Moadi) as it extends to the pregnant caretaker (Sareh Bayat) whom Nader distractedly hires for his Alzheimer’s-stricken father. The film watches each character’s mixed motivations as if preparing a legal brief. PG-13.

AARON MESH. Fox Tower.

Shame

86 “I find you disgusting.”

These are the first substantive words spoken in director Steve McQueen’s sex-negative new film, aptly titled Shame. As in Hunger, McQueen’s first movie, we are made to live through onscreen extremity in all its sometimes tedious detail. But the ugliness remains so lovely that we are not only at its mercy but wholly compelled by it. NC-17. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Living Room Theaters.

NEW

The Steampunk Film Festival

[ONE DAY ONLY] We’re still not sure what they show, but it’s definitely steampunk. Clinton Street Theater. 2 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

23 Because the English actors look distinctive, you can almost follow the plot, beginning with Mark Strong as a secret agent who gets ambushed in Budapest. We’re supposed to be impressed by the men’s cool emotional repression, but also impressed with ourselves for leading happier lives than theirs.

R. ALISTAIR ROCKOFF. Cedar Hills, Hollywood Theatre, Fox Tower.

NEW

LUIGI SP ONSOR E D BY

See Luigi and all the other animals up for adoption on pg. 54

Tomboy

A 10-year-old Frech girl pretends to be a boy. Living Room Theaters.

NEW

True Romance

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] Fleur de Lethal offers its annual Valentine’s gift of James Gandolfini beating the shit out of everybody. Hollywood Theatre. 8:30 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14.

Underworld: Awakening 3D

Kate Beckinsale finds Lycans and POKES YOU IN THE EYE. PG-13.

Not screened for critics.

NEW

Valley Girl

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, REVIVAL] Nic Cage in love. Clinton Street Theater.

7 and 9 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14.

NEW

The Vow

We love these cupcakes like McAdams loves Tatum. Not screened for critics. PG-13. Lloyd Center, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop, Sherwood, Tigard, Wilsonville.

We Bought a Zoo

70 Everybody feels oh so very

much in We Bought a Zoo, but that’s to be expected from Cameron Crowe, whose heart has been perpetually on his sleeve since Say Anything. PG. AARON MESH. Hilltop.

PORTLAND’S FOOD CART FESTIVAL

PRESENTED WITH OMSI

NEW Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?

[THREE NIGHTS ONLY, REVIVAL] Hey, swamp! Hey, swampy! Happy Valentine’s Day!. 5th Avenue Cinema. 7 and 9:30 pm FridaySaturday, 3 pm Sunday, Feb. 10-12.

The Woman in Black

Harry Potter and the chamber of secrets. Not screened by WW press deadlines. PG-13. Lloyd Center, Cedar Hills, Clackamas, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Evergreen, Hilltop.

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

49

THIS VALENTINE’S DAY WEEKEND,

MOVIES

FEB, 10-16

BREWVIEWS

MAKE A DATE.

PIMPIN’ AIN’T EASY: Whenever I feel uncomfortable about parading my Beer and Movie events through these pages (two days left of 35 mm at the Academy! Closing party at Vintage Cocktail Lounge at 9 pm tonight!), I try to remember Tom Cruise’s smile in Risky Business. There isn’t much else to recall: His parquet slide in BVDs is famous mostly because it’s inside a Tangerine Dream vacuum. But the movie holds some interest because it shows Cruise, long before he metamorphosed into an OT VII, still hatching into a diminutive dervish of sales. It’s as if Benjamin Braddock heard the word “plastics” and thought that’s what he should mold himself out of. So then: See this movie! Drink a lot! Keep Beer and Movie working! AARON MESH. Showing at: Laurelhurst. Best paired with: Ninkasi Total Domination IPA. Also showing: True Romance (Hollywood Theatre).

Mon-Tue-Wed 12:00, 02:30, 05:15, 08:00

St. Johns Twin Cinemas and Pub 807 Lloyd Center 10 and IMAX

SCREEN GEMS AND SPYGLASS ENTERTAINMENT PRESENT A BIRNBAUM/BARBER PRODUCTION MUSIC “THEMUSICVOW” SAM NEILL SCOTT SPEEDMAN AND JESSICO-CA LANGE SUPERVISOR RANDALL POSTER

BY RACHEL PORTMAN MICHAEL BROOK PRODUCERS CASSIDY LANGE REBEKAH RUDD EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS J. MILES DALE AUSTIN HEARST SUSAN COOPER PRODUCED

BY ROGER BIRNBAUM GARY BARBER JONATHAN GLICKMAN PAUL TAUBLIEB STORY SCREENPLAY

BY STUART SENDER

BY ABBY KOHN & MARC SILVERSTEIN AND JASON KATIMS DIRECTED

BY MICHAEL SUCSY LOCAL LISTINGS FOR THEATERS AND SHOWTIMES STARTS FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 10 CHECK

50

Willamette Week FEBRUARY 8, 2012 wweek.com

2 COL. (3.825") X 12" = 24" WED 2/8 PORTLAND WILLAMETTE WEEK

1510 NE Multnomah Blvd., 800-326-3264 JOURNEY 2: THE MYSTERIOUS ISLAND -- AN IMAX 3D EXPERIENCE FriSat-Sun-Mon 12:10, 02:40, 05:10, 07:50, 10:25 STAR WARS: EPISODE I -- THE PHANTOM MENACE 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 12:50, 03:55, 07:00, 10:05 THE VOW Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 12:00, 12:40, 02:30, 05:05, 07:05, 07:40, 10:15 SAFE HOUSE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 12:20, 01:00, 03:15, 03:50, 06:50, 07:20, 09:40, 10:10 CHRONICLE FriSat-Sun-Mon 12:25, 02:45, 05:00, 07:30, 09:45 THE WOMAN IN BLACK FriSat-Sun-Mon 12:05, 02:55, 05:20, 07:55, 10:20 THE GREY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 12:55, 03:40, 07:10, 10:00 HAYWIRE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 03:25, 09:55 HUGO 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 12:30, 03:30, 06:45, 09:50 THE METROPOLITAN OPERA: GöTTERDäMMERUNG - LIVE Sat 09:00

Regal Lloyd Mall 8 Cinema

2320 Lloyd Center Mall, 800-326-3264 JOURNEY 2: THE MYSTERIOUS ISLAND FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:20, 06:20 JOURNEY 2: THE MYSTERIOUS ISLAND 3D Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 03:05, 09:00 UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 06:30 UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 03:15, 09:05 THE ARTIST Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:25, 03:10, 06:05, 08:40 BIG MIRACLE Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:05, 03:20, 06:10, 08:55 RED TAILS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 03:00, 08:50 BEAUTY AND THE BEAST 3D FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed

12:00, 03:30 EXTREMELY LOUD & INCREDIBLY CLOSE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:10, 06:00 ONE FOR THE MONEY Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 06:15, 08:45

Bagdad Theater and Pub

3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN PART 1 Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Wed 06:00 THE MUPPETS SatSun-Tue 06:00 MY WEEK WITH MARILYN Sat-SunMon-Wed 08:45 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY

Cinema 21

616 NW 21st Ave., 503-2234515 PINA 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 04:30, 07:00, 09:15

Clinton Street Theater

2522 SE Clinton St., 503238-8899 I AM BRUCE LEE FriSat-Mon-Wed 07:00, 09:00 HAPPY Sat 07:00 THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW Sat 12:00 THE STEAMPUNK FILM FESTIVAL Sun 02:00 VALLEY GIRL Tue 07:00, 09:00

Laurelhurst Theatre

2735 E Burnside St., 503232-5511 RISKY BUSINESS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:35 MELANCHOLIA Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:45 THE MUPPETS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:30, 09:25 MY WEEK WITH MARILYN Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 07:10 DRIVE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:50 MIDNIGHT IN PARIS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:00 SHAME Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 09:05

Roseway Theatre

7229 NE Sandy Blvd., 503282-2898 THE ARTIST Fri-Sat-Sun-

8704 N Lombard St., 503286-1768 THE ARTIST Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 05:30, 07:50 THE GREY Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 05:00, 07:30

Kennedy School Theater

5736 NE 33rd Ave., 503249-7474 ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS: CHIPWRECKED Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:30 CONTRABAND Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:30 THE MUPPETS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:30 IMMORTALS Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 09:45

Fifth Avenue Cinemas

510 SW Hall St., 503-7253551 WHO’S AFRAID OF VIRGINIA WOOLF? FriSat-Sun 03:00 NO FILMS SHOWING TODAY MonTue-Wed

Hollywood Theatre

4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 503281-4215 THE OSCAR NOMINATED SHORT FILMS 2012: ANIMATED Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 07:15 THE OSCAR NOMINATED SHORT FILMS 2012: LIVE ACTION Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:15 TINKER TAILOR SOLDIER SPY Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:00 THE INNKEEPERS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Wed 09:45 A DANGEROUS METHOD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:30 PORTLANDIA Fri 10:00 THE WALKING DEAD Sun 09:00 EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE DOGGIEWOGGIEZ Mon 07:30 TRUE ROMANCE Tue 08:30 HOW TO DIE IN OREGON Wed 07:00 FAST DOGS AND FANCY GADGETS

Regal Fox Tower Stadium 10

846 SW Park Ave., 800326-3264

IN THE LAND OF BLOOD AND HONEY Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:40, 03:25, 07:10, 09:50 A SEPARATION Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:25, 03:20, 07:00, 09:35 THE ARTIST Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 02:25, 04:55, 07:30, 09:40 THE DESCENDANTS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:10, 02:40, 05:10, 07:45, 10:10 ALBERT NOBBS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 11:50, 02:20, 04:50, 07:25, 09:50 THE GREY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:00, 02:30, 05:05, 07:35, 10:05 THE IRON LADY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:55, 02:15, 04:45, 07:15, 09:30 EXTREMELY LOUD & INCREDIBLY CLOSE Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:05 TINKER TAILOR SOLDIER SPY Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 12:35, 03:15, 07:20, 10:00 CARNAGE Fri-SatSun 12:05, 05:00, 07:40 HAYWIRE Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 09:55

Pioneer Place Stadium 6

340 SW Morrison St., 800326-3264 STAR WARS: EPISODE I -THE PHANTOM MENACE 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:00, 04:00, 07:10, 10:20 SAFE HOUSE Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 01:15, 04:10, 07:00, 10:00 JOURNEY 2: THE MYSTERIOUS ISLAND 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 01:30, 07:30, 10:10 JOURNEY 2: THE MYSTERIOUS ISLAND FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:30 THE VOW Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:40, 04:40, 07:40, 10:05 THE WOMAN IN BLACK FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:20, 04:25, 07:20, 09:40 THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO Fri-SatSun 01:10, 04:35, 07:55 GHOST RIDER: SPIRIT OF VENGEANCE 3D

Academy Theater

7818 SE Stark St., 503-2520500 THE MUPPETS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:45 CONTRABAND Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:10, 09:30 MY WEEK WITH MARILYN Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 04:35, 06:45 J. EDGAR Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 09:00 ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS: CHIPWRECKED Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 04:25 MONEYBALL Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 06:30, 09:15 PUSS IN BOOTS Sat-Sun 02:15

Living Room Theaters

341 SW 10th Ave., 971-2222010 TOMBOY Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 12:00, 02:30, 04:50, 07:30, 09:25 A DANGEROUS METHOD Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:20, 02:40, 05:00, 07:15, 09:30 CHRONICLE FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 11:40, 02:20, 04:35, 06:30, 08:25, 10:10 LE HAVRE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:10, 02:50, 05:10, 07:40, 09:40 THE ADVENTURES OF TINTIN 3D Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:50, 04:25, 06:45 SHAME Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 02:10, 09:35 HUGO 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 01:10, 04:00, 07:00, 09:00 SUBJECT TO CHANGE. CALL THEATERS OR VISIT WWEEK.COM/MOVIETIMES FOR THE MOST UP-TODATE INFORMATION FRIDAY-THURSDAY, FEB. 10-16, UNLESS OTHERWISE INDICATED

MOVIES

PIFF 2012

COURTESY OF PIFF

popped in for a rooftop cameo, striped shirt and all. AP KRYZA. CM, 6:15 Friday and 3:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 10-11.

TARGET

51 [RUSSIA] In a not-too-distant Russian future of the Aldous Huxley variety, the youthobsessed superrich descend on the countryside to connect with their roots and get a little wrinkle-release radiation in fallout zones. In between bouts of ultra-rapey sex, one man invents glasses that can visually identify good and evil. Naturally, as Target’s small ensemble becomes more and more enraptured with their obsessions and lusts, its characters teeter on the rotten side of the naughty list with more frequency. It’s a novel idea.

Too bad director Alexander Zeldovich couldn’t come up with a cool gadget to make any of it make any goddamned sense.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: The person in charge of subtitles had realized white text is difficult to read during a film bathed in glowing white. AP KRYZA. LM, 6:30 pm Friday, Feb. 10.

AMADOR

36 [SPAIN] A character study without a character, Amador ends up being just as lumpen as the infuriatingly passive, continually morose face of its protagonist, Marcela, a young Bolivian immigrant who wants everything in her life to effortlessly be different. Ennui is here registered as a potatoey, unsympathetic pout, and each scene is left equally uncooked. In order to earn her caretaker’s wage, Marcela must preserve the illusion that the old man she’s looking after isn’t already dead, while also hiding her pregnancy from the one person in the picture with any life (who is nonetheless treated with disdain): her flower thief of a boyfriend.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: The killjoy didn’t stay in the picture. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. LT, 8:30 pm Friday, Feb. 10. LM, 5 pm Sunday and 8:45 pm Tuesday, Feb. 12 & 14.

DECLARATION OF WAR

POKE YOU IN THE EYE: A Trip to the Moon shows after The Extraordinary Voyage.

PIFF IMPROVEMENT HELPING THE PORTLAND INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL GET BETTER, ONE MOVIE AT A TIME.

BY WW M OV I E STA F F

243-2122

We live in a difficult world. If you were not aware of how difficult it is, the Portland International Film Festival is here to remind you. Even by global cinema’s glum temperament, the 2012 PIFF lineup seems especially forlorn, particularly focused on intractable problems. For example, many people of different ethnicities hate each other with deadly passion. Also, sometimes people of the same ethnicity hate each other with deadly passion. People—and here we are not specifically thinking of the audience at the Portland International Film Festival, but it did expand to Lake Oswego this year—get old and die.

We cannot solve these problems. And we won’t be so presumptuous as to advise PIFF how to improve as a whole: It’s doing pretty good in simply adjusting to the closure of the Broadway Metroplex, the longtime bedrock of its venues, by filling every spare screen in the city. But we can suggest how each film might be a little better. So we will.

What the world needs now is constructive criticism.

SALMON FISHING IN THE YEMEN

[GREAT BRITAIN] A puzzlingly insubstantial opening-night selection (and not the first in recent years), this Lasse Hallström rom-com does manage fierce sparring between Emily Blunt and Ewan McGregor as caustic, contemptuous partners on a photo-op project to bring the Middle East man’s favorite sport. Maybe it only seems ridiculous by dint of environs? But then again, no: This is a movie where McGregor saves a sheik from an assassination attempt by using his fishing rod like a bullwhip to knock a gun from a terrorist’s hand. Accordingly, McGregor’s character is named “Dr. Jones.” A dead soldier is brought back to life so Blunt can face a not-all-that-agonizing decision of the heart, and the love triangle is just like Casablanca, but the exact opposite.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It weren’t made by the Chocolat dude. AARON MESH. NT, 7:30 pm Thursday, Feb. 9.

37

ALMANYA—WELCOME TO GERMANY

60 [GERMANY] Ah, what’s a festival without a comedic-melodramatic ethnic family film devoted to the notion that white people will find brown people endlessly cute? Almanya is the politically and morally charged story of Turkish guest workers in Germany, purged of all charge or edge or seriousness: a Purell-sanitized, treacly multigenerational identity fable with a bouncing-ball soundtrack. Which is not to say it isn’t breezily likable; likability is, in fact, its only reason for being. So we can laugh when the newly emigrated children think that wiener dogs are giant rats, and feel mild nostalgic loss when their former homeland no longer feels like home. And then we can all eat Turkish street food with a newfound sense of fellow feeling.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It weren’t one giant middle-class whitewash. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. WH, 6 pm Friday, Feb. 10. LM, 3:15 and 8:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. LT, 8 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

THE SALT OF LIFE

74 [ITALY] An enjoyably droll little satire about a retired Charlie Brown surrounded by footballpulling Lucys, when all he wants is his fair share of Berlusconi’s Age of Bunga Bunga. Director and lead actor Gianni Di Gregorio—who also did the besieged Roman everyman routine in Mid-August Lunch—plays the abashed old goat, whose efforts to score a little strange on the piazza are undermined by his hesitancy, his mother (Valeria De Franciscis, same as in Mid-August Lunch) and his fondness for white wine. It is essentially a sophisticated Italian version of The 40-Year-Old Virgin.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It had a riotous musical montage at the end. Oh, wait, it does? Then it’s probably about as good as this sort of thing can be. AARON MESH. LT, 6 pm Friday, Feb. 10. CM, 5:45 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

BREATHING

84 [AUSTRIA] It sounds like a middlebrow wet dream: A juvenile in prison learns about life and mortality while on work release, tasked with transporting corpses from the scenes of their demise to the morgue. Yet Karl Markovics’ Breathing is a anything but standard tear-duct exploitation, thanks largely to a wonderfully nuanced turn by Thomas Schubert, who layers his role with grief, anger and vulnerability, especially when an encounter with a woman’s corpse triggers his longing to reconnect with his estranged mother. Like PIFF darling Ramin Bahrani (Goodbye Solo), Markovics knows how to find tremendous power in small moments. His freshman film is emotionally charged dynamite that, like life, offers no simple answers.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Schubert’s troubled relationship with the other kids on the cellblock received a minute or two more screen time. AP KRYZA. LM, 6:15 pm Friday, Feb. 10. CM, 8 pm Sunday, Feb. 12. LT, 6 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14.

A CAT IN PARIS

82 [FRANCE] This year’s token hand-drawn nominee for the Best Animated Feature Oscar, A Cat in Paris is an eye-popping beauty, with a unique style employing elements of cubism. It helps that the story of a cat burglar and his feline buddy protecting a girl from mobsters is breezy fun, coming off as a kaleidoscopic combination of To Catch a Thief, Spider-Man, and Cassavetes’ Gloria, with our heroes bounding across Parisian rooftops while eluding bumbling goons and the fuzz. It may be too arty to grab the gold, but it’s certainly evidence that hand-drawn animation is an art form in dire need of preserving.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: An animated Cary Grant

60 [FRANCE] A light-footed, almost fanciful film framed around a child’s battle with cancer, Declaration of War sounds like a Lifetime movie via Jacques Demy. It’s a bit better than that, though. Actress-director Valerie Donzelli, who wrote the semi-autobiographical screenplay with co-star and real-life baby daddy Jérémie Elkaim, keeps the movie from devolving into a weepy disease drama. Like Mike Mills’ Beginners, War is about adults reacting to life’s tectonic shifts.

Also like Mills, Donzelli doesn’t trust her story. She gussies it up with New Wave-y quirks—three different narrators, an ill-fitting musical number— and relies on the performers (herself included) to salvage its heart. And they do, barely.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It maintained the energy of the lead couple’s punk club meet-cute, though I suppose the post-kid slowdown is the point.

MATTHEW SINGER. 8:30 pm Friday, Feb. 10.

FORGIVENESS OF BLOOD

77 [ALBANIA] Nothing cramps a teenager’s style more than a familial blood feud. Nik (nonpro Tristan Halilaj) is a scrawny Albanian kid growing up in a rural village. Just as he’s finally starting to charm the girl of his dreams, his dad kills one of the neighbors and goes into hiding, prompting the victim’s family to invoke centuries-old Balkan law and call for Nik’s head in retribution. Bummer. Quietly compelling, director Joshua Marston’s first film since 2004’s Maria Full of Grace presents coming of age under the threat of sudden, swift death as not much different than any other adolescent trauma. It’s unclear what inconveniences Nik more: the snipers waiting for him to step outside his house, or the fact that he can’t go to parties anymore.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: There was just a tad more drama. MATTHEW SINGER. CM, 8:30 Friday, Feb. 10. LM, 5 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

THE EXTRAORDINARY VOYAGE

[FRANCE] A dream from the 1890s is alive 93 in color. We’re lucky to be living in a 15 minutes of fame for Georges Méliès’ 15 minutes of wonder: The Parisian cinema pioneer gets a Ben Kingsley cameo in Hugo, and we get a color nitrate print of his 1902 phantasm A Trip to the Moon. Oui, color: The Méliès studio movies (other titles include The Inventor Crazybrains and His Wonderful Airship) were handpainted. The dazzling frames, with their Neptunes and dragons and dirigibles floating through, look like ambulatory gemstones, or those airbrushed T-shirts you buy at the beach.

The attendant documentary is serviceable (trailblazing genius, lost works, found work, Tom Hanks). The restored short, with an eerie score by Air, is a candy shop of the sublime.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Only it lasted forever. AARON MESH. WTC, 8:45 pm Friday, Feb. 10. WH, 3 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

THE FAIRY 55

[FRANCE] Whimsical and lighthearted in

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45

PIFF 2012 (CONT)

COURTESY OF PIFF

MOVIES

ROUND AND ROUND: Bullhead, Attenberg and Turn Me On, Dammit! (left to right). the grand French tradition of other shit your grandma loves, The Fairy contains some excellently goofy moments of physical comedy in telling the story of a lonely hotel clerk’s romance with an kleptomaniacal fairy. Co-directors/stars Dominique Abel and Fiona Gordon’s absurdist comedy sees the pair dancing underwater, encountering flying Frenchmen and traipsing through a world where people burst into song unprovoked. If this is your bag, you’ll be enchanted. If its sounds wholly irritating, well, you’ve been granted a wish to avoid it.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Cirque du Soleil showed up halfway through and had a whimsical throwdown to see who is more magically French. AP KRYZA. LM, 8:45 pm Friday and 3:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 10-11. LT, 8:30 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14.

BULLHEAD

81 [BELGIUM] Set in the Flemish “hormone mafia underground,” freshman director Michael Roskam’s bleak (but not humorless) Oscarnominated thriller centers on one slab of chemically enhanced beef in particular. His name is Jacky. His interests include cattle farming, naked shadowboxing, and sticking needles in his ass.

As a child, Jacky suffered an, um, crushing blow to his manhood, causing him to overcompensate later in life by ’roiding up to Ivan Drago levels.

Appropriately, actor Matthias Schoenaerts plays Jacky as a sort of bipedal cow, physically imposing but psychically neutered. Knotted with localisms, Bullhead’s crime story is too dense to really navigate; as a study of masculinity interrupted, it’s brutal and impossible to ignore.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: There was less, as one character puts it, “balls-ache.” As a man, that’s one of my general rules for art. MATTHEW SINGER. WH, 12:30 pm Saturday and 8:45 pm Tuesday, Feb. 11 & 14.

MONSIEUR LAZHAR

70 [CANADA] It might be the most startling image yet of this young PIFF: A boy peeks into his middle-school classroom, and through a sliver of doorway sees his teacher’s lifeless body hanging from the ceiling. Not a conventional way of starting a “magical schoolteacher” movie, but don’t worry: It gets conventional pretty quick.

The titular Mr. Lazhar (Mohamed Fellag) is hired as the dead woman’s replacement, and soon he’s not just teaching these kids...they’re teaching him. Still, writer-director Philippe Falardeau keeps things simple enough, allowing the sincere performances from Fellag and the young Sophie Nélisse and Émilien Néron—both from the “so mature it’s unnatural” class of child actors—to bolster the film beyond its clichés.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Monsieur Lazhar was Mr. Laser, a former American Gladiator exiled in Canada and trying to make a difference.

MATTHEW SINGER. LT, 3 pm Saturday, Feb. 11.

LM, 6:15 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

CAFE DE FLORE

17 [CANADA] Pro tip: The best time to walk out on this faux-poignant jumblefuck of nonsense is during the opening credits, when hunky club DJ Antoine (Kevin Parent) fades into the background of an airport terminal as a slow-motion parade of Down syndrome patients marches into the foreground. It’ll save you from having to endure the cloying special-needs love story, the meta-spiritual “twist” that intertwines the concurrent narratives, and more than three minutes of director Jean-Marc Vallée’s hyper-pretentious editing, which garbles his cosmic statement about love, music and happiness into vomitous arthouse slush. The only message that emerges from the muck is that Evelyne Brochu looks good naked. She is naked a lot, so that’s a plus.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Antoine got stabbed in a swordfight by the Beefeater Gin mascot he con-

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tinually hallucinates as a symbol of his alcohol addiction (seriously). MATTHEW SINGER. LT, 5:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. LM, 6 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

FOUND MEMORIES

73 [BRAZIL] I’m naturally resistant to magical realism, but the first 20 minutes of Julia Murat’s hymn to aging had an impressive effect: They had me moaning for something, anything mystical to occur. Repeated scenes of routine in the imaginary mountain hamlet of Jotuomba are like a rural Brazilian ad for Dunkin’ Donuts: Madalena (Sonia Guedes) rises in the wee hours, and it’s time to make the biscuits! Eventually, a photographer (Lisa Favero) arrives, and the ancient rituals are revealed in close-up as a kind of beneficence.

The movie is very much an undergraduate shutterbug’s gothic fantasy—I’m surprised there aren’t more pictures of shoes—but it is entrancing.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Things started not happening a little quicker. AARON MESH. LM, 6 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. PP, 8:45 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

SNOWS OF KILIMANJARO

75 [FRANCE] Old filmic hand Robert Guédigan’s subtle, soft-toned piece of working man’s sentimentality is way more pink-positive than the fest’s film about breast cancer funding— or more pinko-positive, anyway. The implausibly roseate situation it depicts—a sainted, laid-off union leader developing deep sympathies for his own violent houserobber out of cosmic solidarity—is made nonetheless workable by actor Jean-Pierre Darroussin’s gruffly sympathetic performance and Guédigan’s patient craftsmanship in building the story’s characters and central dilemma. Which is to say, the open-palmed earnestness of the film leads not merely to warm fuzzies but also a rewarding, intelligent moral complexity.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It didn’t nonetheless congratulate itself and its characters so heartily for being all such wonderful people. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. CM, 6 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. LM, 8:45 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

WHERE DO WE GO NOW?

43 [LEBANON] Director and star Nadine Labaki’s second feature proves notoriously dour Lebanese cinema can be downright whimsical. Until a kid gets shot, anyway. Before that happens, Where Do We Go Now?, about the women of a remote village attempting to quell a sectarian prank war from escalating into full-on Christian-on-Muslim violence, resembles one of those lighthearted English community comedies. Then a boy is killed, and the weeping starts.

A delicate hand is needed to guide such tonal zigzags; jolting from a mother cursing the Virgin Mary to ladies singing about baking hash cookies, Labaki’s hands must be made of lead.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Instead of telling the neighbors he’s just sick, maybe the mother of the dead boy tried to convince the village he’s still alive à la Weekend at Bernie’s? MATTHEW SINGER. WH, 8:30 pm Saturday, Feb. 11. LT, 6 and 8:30 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

MR. TREE

[CHINA] In many ways a successor to the attentive, character-based neorealism of director Jia Zhangke (who produced it), debut director Han Jie’s Mr. Tree seems to nonetheless want to be expressionistic allegory. It succeeds wholly as neither, meandering waywardly through the half-fantasized life of equally wayward, drunken fool Shu (Chinese for “Tree”), who eventually becomes mere metaphorical placeholder for the fate of traditional Chinese values in the wake of citified industrialization. The viewer’s sympathy lies, unfortunately, nowhere: When you make half your characters inarticulately metaphorical and 58

the rest merely props, the humanity whose loss you’re lamenting is sadly lost from the start.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It were a sweeping historical epic showing the bloodstained majesty of the inevitable Chinese Empire. Sad to say. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. CM, 12:45 pm Sunday, Feb. 12. LM, 6:15 pm Tuesday, Feb. 14.

GOODBYE FIRST LOVE

82 [FRANCE] Another gorgeously assured reflection from Mia Hansen-Løve (The Father of My Children), but this time with enough teengirl pouting and drama that it could be a French version of Twilight. (No werewolves, better music, everybody gets shirtless.) Lola Créton, the sprite from Bluebeard, plays a heroine not easily dissuaded from a boy (Sebastian Urzendowsky) more interested in world travel. The film, which has the pacific maturity occasionally brushed by Truffaut, recognizes that erotic obsession is like a recurring illness, and sometimes the best you can hope for is to have it go into remission.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: Well, maybe if there was one werewolf. Especially in the middle acts. AARON MESH. LM, 2 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

TALES OF THE NIGHT

55 [FRANCE] Tales of the Night looks like precisely what it is: a French public television show adapted for the screen, depicting folk tales from all over the world—sometimes faithfully, sometimes with “sassy” updates to the endings and morals. The framing device used to bind these tales is awkward at best, the stories pedantically overexplained and the pacing painfully slow, but animator Michel Ocelot’s African-inflected, 3-D-dioramic, shadow-play animations are at least lovely enough to be distracting, should one want to bring a school group down for educational purposes.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: I were 6 years old. Even at 7, I would feel bored and itchy and patronized to.

MATTHEW KORFHAGE. WH, 5:30 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

TURN ME ON, DAMMIT!

84 [NORWAY] I would love this to become the Say Anything or Pump Up the Volume for a generation of young Norwegian teens raised on Internet pornography—never mind that all the film’s porn happens anachronistically on paper or over the phone. Even with its opening nubile masturbatory scene and a main plot point involving a teen boy surprising a (not unwilling) girl by poking her thigh with his turtlenecked penis, this

is essentially a warm, goofily outsider comingof-age story—albeit for a very horny 15-year-old girl (Alma, played with heartbreakingly tender naiveté by non-pro actress Helene Bergsholm).

The bawd and awkwardness all read largely true until a too-pat ending more at home in the smooth-polished John Hughes ’80s than amid kids who spent the whole film cruelly appending a penis to the main character’s name.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It maintained adolescence’s nervous, cruel ambiguities even to the end, rather than falsely resolve them all. Or maybe if it ended like Heathers. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. WH, 8 pm Sunday, Feb. 12.

ATTENBERG

79 [GREECE] Between this and 2009’s Dogtooth (which involved some of the same people), Greek film is looking pretty interesting of late. Attenberg—a film about a near-autistic, sexually inexperienced woman with a randy best friend and a dying father—shares with that film its languid pacing, expressionistic form and yen for the sexual grotesque. But although the film is shot almost as a clinical documentary about impossible human interaction (somewhere at the intersection of David Attenborough nature films and old Françoise Hardy Scopitones), it also shares some of that same no-shots-barred, delightful anarchy of early Godard, though without his egomaniacal self-assurance.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It actually found some of that assurance, and thereby also a lighter step.

MATTHEW KORFHAGE. CM, 6 and 8:45 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

CIRKUS COLUMBIA

40 [BOSNIA] On the eve of the Yugoslav Wars, a rich asshole named Divko Buntic (Miki Manojlovic, looking like a puppet from Genesis’ “Land of Confusion” video) returns to Herzegovina after decades in exile. He kicks his ex-wife out of her house, buys out the salon where she works and bequeaths it to his hot new girlfriend, and shows more affection for his cat than his son. Amid his tyrannical homecoming, an Oepidal soap opera breaks out between his fiancée and son, his beloved cat goes missing, then the bombs start to drop, and perhaps it’s all a metaphor for the ethnic tensions dividing Bosnia, but I really couldn’t bring myself to care much about any of it.

IT’D BE BETTER IF: It involved an actual circus.

One lone swing ride doesn’t cut it. MATTHEW SINGER. PP, 6 pm Monday, Feb. 13.

PORTLAND INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL TICKET OUTLET: Portland Art Museum Mark Building, 1119 SW Park Ave., 276-4310, nwfilm.org.

General admission $10, Art Museum members, students and seniors $9, children 12 and under $7, Silver Screen Club memberships from $300.

CM—CineMagic, 2021 SE Hawthorne Blvd.

LM—Regal Lloyd Mall Cinema, 2320 Lloyd Center Mall NT—Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway LT—Lake Twin Cinema, 106 N State Street, Lake Oswego PP—Regal Pioneer Place, 340 SW Morrison St. WH—Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park Ave. WTC—World Trade Center Theater, 121 SW Salmon St. Showtimes listed are for Feb. 9-14 only. Some of these films will show again next week.

WW was unable to screen 22 films by press deadlines; visit wweek.com for full listings.