LINK PLUS Vol 8

A Weekly Link Supplement

n’s Autumty Bounired Fall Insp Nosh'ers

Vol. 1 Issue 8 / Nov. 6, 2019

His Art

by Design First Impressions

Game Changer Well, I'll Never...

DIY

Umbrella Stand

color

Kaleidoscope of

Nov. 6, 2019

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table of contents Publisher The Weekly Sob, Sob!Link

Move!

And Set the Mood

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His art by Design First Impressions

8

Autumn’s Bounty Fall Inspired Nosh'ers

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“Fall”ing into Spring

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Stop. change. Now. The Dynamics of Change

18

Easy supper to greet your kids with 19

TRAINING GROUND serial

20

bedtime battle tips 24

game changer well, i'll never

24

umbrella stands diy

28

6 Simple Solutions

30

Teach your Phone children to laugh 347.787.1838 at their terrible predicaments

Fax

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347.787.4018

Back In School Email

plus@weeklylink.com Common sense tips and tricks 8 Website www.weeklylink.com Looking

for a job?

Mailing Address

Professional resume 1303 53rd St. writer shares some Suite #125 guidelines 11219 12 Brooklyn NY

Off the bus basics

© 2019. All Rights Reserved.

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Creative Creations 31 2|

Move!

Mood And

Set

the

B. Schwartz

Let’s meet with two sisters, Yides and Chayala, who uprooted their families and moved from Boro Park to Monsey. Listen in to their candid and humorous reflections. >>>

Nov. 6, 2019

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her block.

Hi Yides, Hi Chayala.

May I take this opportunity to ask you why you moved to Monsey?

Yides: Sure you can ask, I don’t have to answer… just kidding. We moved because an enticing offer fell into our hands, literally an offer that we could not refuse.

Honestly, I never thought I’d land up here. I’m a city girl (at least I was a city girl) through and through, the type that thrived on the constant hustle-bustle. I found the honking and sirens comforting- like a calming background symphony. I loved the city tumult. Note that I said loved - in past tense. Lo and behold, Monsey actually worked its magic on me.

Chayala: I moved because my husband wanted to move. Most of his family lives in Monsey. I wanted to stay in Boro Park. Realistically, we didn’t really have much of a future in Boro Park. Our apartment was becoming too small and the larger apartments were way too expensive.

What made it easier for me to move, though, was that my sister Yides moved to Monsey the year before and found an apartment for me on

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Yides: Not close enough. It’s an almost five-minute walk, with a little hill in the middle.

Chayala: No, you can do it in three minutes, you know. It’s not that far at all!

Yides: I think it takes less time for you to come to me than for me to come to you.

Chayala: Whatever.

What do you miss most about Boro Park?

Chayala: Oh, what don’t I miss?

I miss my family, the action, the stores, my friends, but I don’t miss my apartment. I lived in a (relatively) nice-sized apartment, with some extra living space and a spacious kitchen. But I lived in the basement.

We had mold growing on the wall and all we could see out of the small basement windows were people’s feet. I could not figure out what the weather was outside. I would call my sisters to find out if my kids needed jackets or coats, if it was snowing or raining.

Yides: I miss my family and the ease with which I navigated the streets and the stores. In Boro Park I knew which stores sold what, which groceries were cheaper and so on. I knew how to use the public transportation, I had a relationship with our pediatrician… life was predictable. Here I feel like a stranger.

What are the benefits and

drawbacks of moving Upstate?

Yides: Let’s start with the benefits; The trees, the grass, the fresh almost mountain-like air, the space… I just love it! Do you even know how many stars there are in the sky?

I have the nicest neighbors and guess what? I have a laundry room!

Laundry does not get folded on my dining room couch anymore. And my sister lives across the street. But you know that already.

Monsey has an additional benefit.

At the beginning I didn’t like it, but I learnt to appreciate it very quickly.

You see, the quiet is almost shtetllike (at least the area where I live.

I know that some areas are almost city-like by now). When I first moved, that hushed stillness was so noisy.

We put the kids to sleep and shaaa….

Nowhere to go and nothing to do (besides for dishes and laundry and cooking and cleaning). But that quiet space helps you focus on what’s really important. You can focus on your family, spend more time with them, listen more, do less and get to know yourself better!

Nov. 6, 2019

Truthfully, these qualities can be accessed wherever one desires them.

The atmosphere here, though, is more conducive to it.

The drawbacks for me are the lack of family, the loneliness. I remember, when I first moved, on long Shabbos afternoons the streets filled up with families heading out to visit their relatives. I felt so left out. I tried not to think about my family in the city.

When I finally had someone to visit on Shabbos, I wanted to announce to one and all ‘see everyone? I also have where to go!’

Feeling like a stranger and getting used to new supermarkets, shopping centers, transportation systems, doctors, pharmacies… almost everything! can be quite unsettling.

I also find it difficult that everything is so far away. We use car services here all the time and the distant supermarkets…! Well, I have one piece of advice for anyone living upstate: Get yourself nice neighbors with well-stocked pantries!

Chayala: The benefits of living in Monsey? Oh, I love the deer and the crickets at night… OK, seriously, it’s more peaceful, there are hardly

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any hatzoloh calls (I know, I know, they just don’t use sirens here…), the areas that have grass have grass… You see, Yides has a beautiful backyard with lots of grass and trees.

My backyard is non-existent and the few little patches of grass sticking out around the driveway, remind me of Boro Park. But in the city, I lived in a private house with three other families. Here I live in an apartment on the third floor of a complex with perhaps fifteen families!

But, I do have a laundry closet, closets in each room, two bathrooms, a porch and an extra bedroom.

My kids love their new school and Baruch Hashem, in an amazing twist of hashgacha, I got a part-time job tailor-made for me.

Oh, and my husband just loves the fact that he travels back and forth to Brooklyn every day for work.

Anything you’d like to tell people that are thinking about moving away from the city?

Yides: My friend moved to Lakewood from Boro Park, and she gave me the best advice. “Yides,” she said, “It’s OK to complain and feel the difficulties of adjusting. But after a while, know that it’s you that will determine your level of happiness, not your surroundings.

If you focus on the negative, you’ll see the bad and have a much harder time acclimating. Focus on the good. And it will be good.”

She was so right.

If you plan to move, do so with a

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positive attitude. Daven to Hashem for His help, ask da’as Torah. Know that Hashem is with you wherever you are and that He is Who provides you with a feeling of security, not your environment.

Chayala: My advice to those looking to move is: Move across the street from your sister. Have a car that works very well (so that you can always go back and visit family). Be aware that there is only one toy store in Monsey.

How do you keep up with family?

Chayala: Well, we practically live on the George Washington Bridge.

And we have a guest room, where my sister Yides and I fight over which family members comes to sleep by whom. (Don’t worry, we fight nicely.)

Yides: I miss my family. No, I don’t get to see them very often. It bothers me. I try to keep up with phone calls.

And I do have a guest room for when family members want to come visit.

How did your children adjust to the move?

Yides: The older ones found it difficult. My oldest still talks about his classmates, calls them and writes them letters. The younger ones adjusted pretty quickly. Now, when we come to Boro Park, my once- upon- a- time city kids get overwhelmed by the noise and the cramped living quarters. My baby cries when he hears a siren; my older kids, when they were small, they

didn’t even blink!

Chayala: My oldest also had a difficult first year, although by now, my kids are Baruch Hashem very happy.

We keep hearing from those that moved to Monsey/ Lakewood not to move before getting one’s children into schools. Did you have difficulty getting into schools?

Yides: Yes! It is a humbling experience, having to beg your way into a school. The school I thought I’d surely get into, since we knew so many of the staff members, had no room for us. The school we were told “don’t even try to apply!” is the school my daughter happily attends now.

Hashem’s hashgacha is mysterious and amazing.

My boys experienced more difficulty getting into a Yeshiva. As a fact, the younger grades are easier to get into, as they usually have more parallel classes per grade than the older ones. My boys did not have a yeshiva for the first week after we moved here. Imagine unpacking from a move with a bunch of bored boys dancing around. It was not fun.

It sounds like you miss Boro Park.

Would you move back if you can?

Chayala: I’m happy here, though I would move back if I can get a nice big apartment for a reasonable amount of rent.

Yides: I’m Baruch Hashem happy here. Happiness is a state of mind.

You can be happy anywhere and miserable anywhere. Monsey has many good parts and I try to focus on that.

I hope the next place we move to is not Boro Park, but Yerushalayim with Moshiach, very, very soon!

Thank You Yides and Chayala for sharing your experiences in an honest, thoughtful manner. I wish you much hatzlacha and mazel in your new homes.

Nov. 6, 2019

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Design His art by

Yehudis Schonfeld 8|

Of all the lessons I taught my little kindergarten boys, the lesson I taught the week of Parshas Lech Lecha, was by far my favorite.

draw themselves!”

The kids sat in a ‘ches’ (sort of a ‘square half-circle’) and watched as I dragged the clumsy, portable marker board and some colorful expo markers to the center of the classroom. I crouched down on a little blue chair near the board and faced my students at their eye-level.

I walked over to the supplies closet and pulled down a small ‘building’ made out of lego, from the top shelf.

“Kinderlach, close your eyes for a few minutes.”

(They all peeked.)

I quickly drew smiley faces with dancing hands and feet in all different colors on the board.

“OK!” I announced. “Time to open your eyes!”

They smiled when they saw the lively characters wiggling on the board.

“Guess what!” I announced. ”The markers jumped out of the box, onto the board and drew these smiley faces all by themselves!”

Huh? The kids looked confused. Was this their (usually) rational Morah speaking?

(There always were the kids that said “Nuh Uh! We saw Morah drawing the smileys!”

Well kinderlach, your eyes were supposed to be closed.)

I ventured on. “Why not? Why can’t the markers draw the smileys by themselves?”

“Morah!” they protested in exasperated tones, “pictures don’t

Nov. 6, 2019

“Ohhh!” I said with a mysterious smile. “Now look what I’ve got over here!”

“This building, kinderlach, made itself. The door placed itself here, the windows, here and the steps, over there. The legos jumped into position and clicked into place all by themselves.”

The doubt and disbelief on my little boys’ faces grew.

“Morah!” they argued, “things don’t just build themselves! Someone has to build it!!” Nothing happens by itself!” they cried.

“Ohhh,” I drawled. “So Kinderlach, look out of the window. See that tree?”

Their eyes followed my hand as I pointed to the large tree with long, graceful branches, visible from the classroom window.

“How did that tree grow? If nothing builds itself, or draws itself, who made this tree?”

I paused.

“Those leaves. Did you see anyone take a ladder and hang up a bunch of green leaves? What did they use to hang up the leaves, maybe scotch tape, or perhaps some staples?”

They chuckled at my ridiculous depiction.

“And now that the leaves are changing colors, did you see anyone climb up with buckets of paint and paint the

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leaves yellow, red and orange?”

They laughed.

“Now, look at the sky. Did it happen by itself ? Can it happen by itself ? If a simple smiley face cannot draw itself, can clouds hang themselves up in the sky and bring rain and snow all by themselves?”

The kids sat quietly, thoughtful…

“Kinderlach, who beautiful world?”

created

this

“Hashem!!” they called out.

“Can trees, water, the sun… the whole world - create itself ?”

“No!” Inevitably, someone would say, “But Morah, we can’t see Hashem!”

I’d point to the signs on the wall.

“Do you think these signs drew themselves?”

They shook their heads. They knew better than that.

“I didn’t see who drew them, did you?”

They shook their heads no.

I’d continue. “I bought it in the store.

I have no idea who the artist is, but if there’s a sign here, someone must have designed it, even if I can’t see the artist. Someone must have planned every detail and given thought to which colors and shapes the sign should contain. There’s a reason behind the artist’s work.

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“If there is a world with grass, animals, people, clouds, a sky….

Someone must have created it all even if we can’t see Him. And He planned every detail with great care. There’s a reason why He brought everything into being. Who created it all and why did He create it?”

They sat there, those precious yingelach, contemplating what they just heard.

“Come boys,” I said in a low, soothing voice. “Come sit on the floor as I read a book to you about a little boy named Avram who lived in a cave. When he was three years old he stepped out of the cave and saw the most beautiful world. ‘Who created all of this, and why did He create it?’ he wondered…”

“Come boys,” I said in a low, soothing voice. “Come sit on the floor as I read a book to you about a little boy named Avram who lived in a cave. When he was three years old he stepped out of the cave and saw the most beautiful world. ‘Who created all of this, and why did He create it?’ he wondered..."

Author’s note: Although the events of Avram acknowledging Hashem are written in Parshas Noach, for various reasons, many teach it in Parshas Lech Lecha, as an introduction to Avraham Avinu’s life story and mission to spread the light of Hashem all over the world.

“This building, kinderlach, made itself. The door placed itself here, the windows, here and the steps, over there."

Nov. 6, 2019

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Autumn’s Bounty There are so many things we love about fall, but seasonal snacks top our list. This week, we bring you some more healthy and easy-tomake snacks, that can double as sides as well! Delicious and guiltfree, these fall-inspired Nosh’ers will help you make the most of the autumn season.

Enjoy!

-Sarah F.

ABOUT THE EDITOR: Sarah F. is a certified copywriter, columnist, and food enthusiast who’s committed to elevating your everyday cooking experience. In her spare time, she’s busy creating web copy, sketching advertorials, drafting resumes, and researching exotic foods. You can easily get in touch to leave feedback, chat about recipes, or to request a write-up of your choice. thestatementwriter@gmail.com 12 |

Smoky Garlic Cauliflower Poppers Ingredients: • 1 medium head of fresh cauliflower or 5 cups frozen cauliflower florets • 2 tbsp olive oil • 1 tsp smoked paprika • 1/2 tsp chili powder (optional for extra spice) • 1 tsp salt • 2-3 cloves crushed garlic Directions: 1. Preheat oven to 450°. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

2. If using fresh cauliflower, clean and break apart the cauliflower into bite-sized pieces. Spread the cauliflower florets onto prepared baking sheet.

3. In a small bowl, combine the olive oil, smoked paprika, chili powder, and salt. Stir until well combined. Pour mixture over cauliflower florets and toss until fully coated.

4. Bake for 10 minutes. Remove from oven and toss the cauliflower with crushed garlic. Return to oven and bake for an additional 10-15 minutes until slightly browned.

Remove from oven and serve.

Nov. 6, 2019

Cauliflower is a greatly versatile vegetable that’s easy to work with and can be prepared a number of ways. Roasting it in the oven is an easy and flavorful method to bring you that tender yet crisp deliciousness.

Serve alongside a Tahini dipping sauce for some added Mediterranean flavor. Happy Snacking!

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Oven Roasted Chickpeas

These are great by the handful, tossed onto a salad, or sprinkled over your favorite soup. Go with the simple salt & pepper, or dare to experiment with one of the other delicious flavor combos! Any way you go, you’ll have a simple, nutritious, and satisfying snack right at your fingertips.

Ingredients: • 2 (15 oz) cans chickpeas, drained and rinsed • 2 tbsp olive oil • 1/2 tsp each salt & pepper Directions: 1. Preheat oven to 425°. Pour chickpeas onto paper towels, and pat dry. Transfer to a baking sheet and add the oil and seasoning. Toss chickpeas until fully coated.

Bake for about 30 minutes, until crisp.

2. Chickpeas will stay crispy for up to one day, but you can store leftovers in an airtight container for up to a week.

Flavor Ideas (season liberally for optimum flavor): • Garlic Parmesan: Garlic powder, salt, parmesan cheese and butter • Autumn Harvest: Maple syrup, apple cider vinegar, nutmeg, ginger, and cinnamon (increase the cooking time until crisp) • Sweet and Spicy: Sriracha, honey, and salt (increase cooking time until crisp) • Buffalo Burst: BBQ sauce and olive oil • Moroccan Medley: Cumin, smoked paprika, turmeric, ground cinnamon, ground ginger, cayenne pepper, salt, pepper 14 |

Salt and Cracked Pepper Edamame Ingredients: • 16 oz frozen shelled or unshelled edamame • 2 tsp extra-virgin olive oil • 1 tsp salt • 3/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper

Directions: 1. Preheat the oven to 375°.

Once you start snacking on these, you can’t stop!

Crunchy on the outside and chewy in the middle, the sweet flavor of the edamame is balanced out by the salt and freshly-ground black pepper. Be prepared to grab seconds!

2. Spread the edamame in a single layer on a baking sheet and toss with olive oil, salt, and pepper until fully coated. Bake for 3040 minutes. Stir every 15 minutes for even crispiness.

3. Remove the pan from the oven and serve.

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“Fall”ing into Spring Dancing prancing whimsical leaves, A riot of color, floating in the breeze.

How you tantalize and tease, Can you all just slow down please?!

I have a question, can you hear me, An annual seasonal mystery.

Directed at you and your forlorn tree, Whose stunning attire is now history.

How can you and all of creation, Explode in such joyous celebration?

When it’s all really a preparation, For winter’s upcoming hibernation.

Isn’t it hard, are you feeling OK? Exposing your colors for public display.

When beneath all that, there’s weakness and decay, And you’re all being stepped on and shoveled away?!

Dear mystified glassy-eyed “you”, Your comments ring familiar and true.

I’ll answer your questions and when I’m through, You’ll surely feel encouraged and brand new!

For you see, it’s not only me, That is part of this mystery.

It’s all of us in harmony, A metaphor for eternity.

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g

By R. Lowy

Through decaying leaves and a lonely tree, Teaching you what you can be!

Listen well, and you’ll discern, Our lesson as we churn and turn.

The clarity for which you yearn, Is right here for you to learn!

For as you watch us change “our gowns”, From green, to yellow, to dusty browns.

Think of all those smiles and frowns, A colorful life of ups and downs!

Feeling down, not worthy at all, Helpless, discouraged, fragile and small?

It’s only your personal season of “Fall”!

Life may seem dull and grey, You might be having a difficult day.

Remember, hold on tight and pray, Spring is only two seasons away!

Beneath the pain you surely know, Your neshamah continues to glow.

How brightly your “true colors” show!

Hashem loves us through the ups and downs, The pain and joy, the smiles and frowns.

Before you know it, the dusty browns, Will disappear as spring comes to town!

Nov. 6, 2019

The author can be contacted at: 914-299-5744

Don’t feel bad, stand up tall,

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The Dynamics of Change

Stop.

Now. Liba Gottehrer

Randy Glasbergen of cartoon fame, portrays a redheaded girl in one of his handiworks, who cranes her neck to make eye contact with her gray haired counterpart and asks, “My teacher says little girls can grow up to be anything they choose! Why did you choose to be an old lady?�

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We just surfaced from the ecstasy of Yom Tov, where we sought to do an inner revamp. Though no one’s claiming to be done with that yet, it may be time for a face-lift in the gashmius department. The goal is to avoid becoming the gray haired victim of time. It’s a challenge to recognize the signs as the hours and years slip by, and to adapt, because many times it’s easier to bury your head in the time machine.

What makes it so difficult is that change can be seamless. There’s no forbidding red line to cross when you outgrow your house, your phone habits or wardrobe.

Yet, the penalty is retroactive – if you don’t make change where change is due, you end up paying more in terms of frustration and unhappiness than you would have from fear of the unknown.

Being biased, flawed humans, we still can’t see the forest for all the trees.

Watching someone else in your position transition to the next stage in life, though, is like a forest fire – it flashes a raging, fluorescent sign that says, “Time to move on.” Ruchy Portugal strongly seconds this sentiment. “The day my workmate came in for the last time,” she confides, “it suddenly hit me that she was really leaving. I had been toying with the idea of resigning for a while. Just a week earlier, my husband had handed me the phone, with the intention that I would call my boss. I couldn’t do it. Now that I watched a close workmate leave and the world continued rotating, I knew that I could do it too.”

Temi Katz had a slightly different take on the matter. “For me, leaving my job was a matter of time, three years’ time, in fact. I taught in the same school for eight years, and after five years I told my principal that I was resigning to be there for my growing family. I came back anyway. It’s scary to let go when you don’t know what you’ll do

Nov. 6, 2019

next or where the money will come from, especially if your friends keep telling you about the ‘full time mommy letdown’. After another two years of mind numbing debates each June and sleepless nights until September, I finally gave up my beloved teaching.”

Temi recounts gratefully how her principal offered her a different job in the school later that summer. She now works out of the house only once a week, and loves every minute of it.

Often, people will relate how they knew they had to make a lifestyle alteration, but it was just too insurmountable a task to carry out. In that case, it might take months or longer until the need becomes desperate enough to necessitate change. This happened to M. K. She tells her tale, “My two young children went to sleep very late – so late that I couldn’t accomplish much besides for supper cleanup at night, before I collapsed into bed. In the morning, we were all tired. Housework was spiraling out of control, because when the kids took a morning nap, I took one too. I knew something had to be done, but I couldn’t figure out what.

Putting the kids to sleep earlier didn’t work – they would come out of bed or cry. After Succos, when everybody was off schedule anyway, I finally took the plunge and redid my entire bedtime routine. It took a lot of patience and persistence, but it was the best gift I could’ve given myself.”

One last tip - transformations are that much easier to execute with someone who’s going through the same thing. A diet partner, someone to commiserate with as you pack up the moving boxes, or even a motivational walking companion are great for your resolve. So if you know it’s time to do it differently, grab a buddy and go for it!

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8

TRAINING GROUND

by Chava Leah Beer

Recap: Shoshana manages to find out about the lively, wellliked Ayala before the accident.

Rebbetzin Thaler agrees with Shoshana that her workmate may be suffering from PTSD. In a class on PTSD, Rebbetzin Thaler tells the story of an American soldier who went through trauma during the Vietnam War and tells of an incredible treatment called EMDR that helped him recover.

Chapter Eight At the mention of EMDR, Rebbetzin Thaler noticed everyone’s raised eyebrows and went on to explain.

“EMDR – Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing is a proven technique where the client is instructed to simultaneously

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relive the traumatic events while conducting specific bilateral eye movements and sometimes other tactile stimulation such as tapping.

In conjunction with psychotherapy, the negative and traumatic episode gets reprocessed in the brain and neutralized, allowing the client to heal.

“After eight EMDR sessions and an additional period of psychotherapy, the veteran gained a new lease on life. He no longer reacted so violently to his emotional triggers and he now lives with a high quality of life.”

Next, Rebbetzin Thaler presented several real-life illustrations of people who had varying degrees of PTSD and how it affected them.

She gave some tips regarding

an outsider’s reaction to a friend or family member suffering from trauma.

Finally, she said, “Remember, validation, validation, validation. That’s the number one principle when dealing with any issue, especially PTSD, which is so often treated by minimizing or even poking fun at the sufferer, blaming him or her for having an overactive imagination or a disproportionate amount of fear.”

After some lively give and take, the lights dimmed all at once and the superintendent entered the hall, “Ladies, it’s 10:00. Everyone out!” *** Shoshana was still mulling over Rebbetzin Thaler’s information at work the next day, when Mr. Gruber, who had come to bring his son for a throat culture, commented, “There’s a strange smell in this office.”

Shoshana sniffed, then nodded in agreement.

“Let’s open the windows to let some fresh air in, even though it’s cold. Maybe it’s the lingering smell of vomit from a little earlier today.”

She walked over to the window and slid it open. A gust of wind blew in and with it the distinct odor of burning rubber.

“Aha, so it’s coming from outside,” Shoshana exclaimed, quickly closing the window again.

On the surveillance camera, she could see the hood of a car parked on the street spewing forth pillars of smoke.

Out of the corner of her eye, Shoshana noticed Ayala uncharacteristically look up from

Nov. 6, 2019

the computer screen and follow her gaze to the camera. She suddenly became stiff, her face taking on a ghostly shade of white and her breathing quick and shallow.

Before long, the fire department arrived at the scene. They doused the flames and put barricades around the smoking car. Everything looked under control and thankfully, no one had been hurt.

Alternating between directing patients to various rooms, answering questions and watching the drama unfold outside, Shoshana suddenly caught sight of a tear slipping out of Ayala’s eye. And then another.

Shoshana quickly told the next patient that she would be with her shortly and led her workmate to an empty room. She sat near Ayala and whispered, “Oh. That must have brought back some painful memories.”

Ayala sat up sharply. An expression of surprise replaced the distress on her features and she asked, “You know about it?”

Passing Ayala a tissue, Shoshana answered, “Yes.” She decided to stay quiet after that and let Ayala proceed at her own pace.

Ayala tried to steady her breathing, but her body shook involuntarily.

“I have this all the time. Sirens, fire, smoke, police, they all make me panic, as if I was back there on that country road…” she trailed off.

Shoshana could not believe it. Ayala had spoken two full sentences.

She nodded her head understandingly, “That must be so

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hard.”

Ayala gave Shoshana a sad smile, but it was a smile, no doubt.

Could her frozen façade have cracked a tiny bit?

“Are you ready to go back to work yet, or do you want to take some time for yourself first?”

“I’ll take a short break.”

“Good, see you soon.”

Shoshana went back to her desk feeling torn. She so badly wanted to stay with Ayala, but the patients need her attention.

A small yellow sticky note caught her eye. Please come to my office right after work. I must discuss something with you. Dr. Lowy.

I wonder what he wants to discuss with me. Maybe a raise? No – he just gave me one a few months ago. Is he upset about something? For the second time that day, Shoshana had to make a conscious effort to focus her thoughts on her job. *** Dr. Lowy adjusted his glasses, “So, you see, Miss Pressman, why I appreciate how well you are treating your new workmate. Originally, I thought it would be better for Miss Roth to just start out on equal footing with everyone else in the office, but now I see that she needs all the encouragement she can get.”

Shoshana nodded, trying to listen politely as Dr. Lowy recounted the details of the accident that had claimed Ayala’s father’s life and the trauma the family had undergone two years earlier and was still struggling with today.

22 |

“I actually already found out this information, in a rather roundabout way,” she said softly. “I realized almost immediately that Ayala was dealing with something very difficult.”

“Right.”

Dr. Lowy scribbled something onto a sticky note and gave it to her.

“That’s why I called you in today.

This is the number of a family friend in England who’s very concerned about Miss Roth and is trying to help her out. I figured it may come in handy.”

“Thanks,” Shoshana said. “Uh, Dr. Lowy?”

He rose from his upholstered swivel chair and pulled his keys out of his pocket. “Yes?” “Would it be possible for me to take a few days off next month? Just an extended weekend, from March 1st until the 5th?”

Dr. Lowy glanced quickly at his calendar and then looked back at Shoshana.

“It should be fine, but you’ll have to line up a replacement. To the best of my memory, you haven’t taken off for a year now, correct?”

“Uh-huh,” she said, recalling last year’s shidduch fiasco which had necessitated missing a few days of work. She wouldn’t exactly call that a vacation, though.

“So, go ahead and enjoy. And of course, remember to tell Miss Roth about the change.” *** Shoshana almost dumped the grocery bags on the counter, but

She sat near Ayala and whispered, “Oh. That must have brought back some painful memories.”

she remembered just in time that one of the bags had eggs inside.

Though she was physically and emotionally drained after her long workday, followed by the meeting with Dr. Lowy, her mother had asked her to pick up a few items on her way home from work, and she felt she couldn’t refuse.

The house was quiet. No one was in the kitchen or the dining room.

She grabbed an apple and a granola bar then sat down to refresh herself.

Feeling slightly better when she was done, she quickly unpacked the groceries before Grandma could scold her for spoiling the milk and headed up to her room.

She heard voices coming from Grandma’s room.

Nov. 6, 2019

in 15 minutes…”

“An old lady also has the right to look pretty sometimes! If I don’t wear the black, what’s left?”

“Mom, I’ve been trying to help you decide for the past half hour! And I still have to finish getting dressed myself.”

Oh, right, tonight is Baila’s wedding!

Baila Gottleib was Shoshana’s second cousin, all of 19, who was getting married that night. Shoshana had no plans of attending, but as a great-aunt, Grandma had been talking about this simcha for weeks now. At the rate they were going, she wondered if they would get there in time.

“No, that dress is too plain. I wear it for Bar Mitzvahs.”

Should she step in and take over?

Her mother seemed to be at her wits’ end.

“But Chaim is coming to pick us up

To be continued…

| 23

Well, I’ll Never‌

Miri Eizikovits 24 |

Minna:

Gowns are packed away, hundreds of bobby pins stashed with other hair accessories, petticoats returned to the gemach, and the house is beginning to take on some semblance of order after a gala week of sheva brachos.

Everyone from adult to tot, is exhausted after all the traveling back and forth. I think I could drive from Boro Park to Lakewood blindfolded by now (though I would have to get a driving license first!). I am catching my breath and desperately urging my faithful routine to get back into place. Once that happens I’ll be able to get back at my desk at the “Chessed V’emes*” office. It was no small feat marrying off my son, but what I found hardest of all was the traveling to and fro. I vow with no small measure of jest, to find a Boro Park girl for my next son. He’s a great boy, and there are great girls to be had here too, so why schlep out?

Pessy:

Moishy seems to be handling it better than us parents and I give him a lot of credit for it. It isn’t easy being ‘skipped’ in our chassidishe circles, and having your younger sister get married, leaving you in the dust is enough to put a gloom over any bochur. Moishy is taking somewhat longer finding his bashert. One thing is sure, we are not going to skip him again come what may. Chany is young and there is no urgent need to marry her off before Moishy is married.

Minna:

Shenishma venisbaser besoros tovos.

Today at “Chessed V’emes” I handled a new tragic case. Hashem, When will the cup of tears be full to the brim? A

Nov. 6, 2019

young father in Lakewood passed away leaving behind a widow and four orphans r”l. A neighbor of the poor family called me all hysterical, “Hello. My name is Pessy, and my neighbor just called me frantically in to her house after finding her husband on the floor blue in the face. Hatzola is here at the moment and unfortunately it is all over. This neighbor is from abroad and all on her own now. So I’ll be with her for the time being but I’m young and really inexperienced with anything of this sort. Can you please guide me step by step, as to what I’m supposed to do, and when?”

I stayed with Pessy on the line guiding her through exactly what she should expect, how to proceed, and how to handle the befallen family. Once she was composed and comfortable enough to put down I gave her my cell number and insisted that she call me at any time, whatsoever, with any problems that were bound to crop up.

Pessy:

What a harrowing day! Mr. Gross next door passed away from a heart attack and I’ve been sitting with his wife all day long making the myriad necessary arrangements while holding her hand throughout. Nebach, her entire family lives abroad, and she has no one at all to be with her throughout this tragic ordeal. I tried my best to fill those shoes and with the wonderful help of some woman Minna at the Chessed V’emes organization, I’d like to think that I somewhat succeeded. I’m staying here at the Gross’s overnight and will arrange for the neighbors to come by tomorrow and step up to the plate, taking the kids and preparing meals... Hashem should give this young almanah strength and let her

| 25

find solace. A tough week is coming up.

Minna:

I almost feel like me and Pessy were acquainted ever since. We’ve been in touch the entire week regarding the passing of Mr. Gross, and I’ve helped her collect funds for the funeral, as well as provided all the necessary shivah arrangements for the Gross household. Mrs. Gross sure does have a devoted neighbor- I seldom come across such good hearted and selfless people. Can you believe she even slept with Mrs. Gross the entire week of shivah so that she wouldn’t sleep all by herself ? And mind you the Gross children are all at Pessy’s house. Pessy’s eighteen year old daughter Chany is handling them very well. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

Pessy:

I can’t think straight. Mrs. Gross is learning to cope and I’m back home doing the usual (may it continue in that manner without any surprises).

I’m just catching my breath, when a very persistent shadchan gets onto my back. I tell him Chany is young and besides, we are not skipping Moishy again come what may. He is welcome to redt me shidduchim for Moishy. But said shadchan insists I check out this boy whose mother Minna works at Chessed V’emes.

Wait a minute, did he say Minna from Chessed V’emes? You can bet I’ll look into this one. Minna is truly one of a kind and her holding hand throughout the ordeal next door was unbelievably unique. It was done with incomparable compassion and if the shadchan is redting a boy from such

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an outstanding home, for my Chany, well I can’t shrug it off just like that.

We’re talking real caliber here. I’ll have to discuss this with the husband, and most likely we should ask our rav.

Minna:

“Sorry, at the moment I am not listening to shidduchim outside of Boro Park. My son is a top boy and I can allow myself to be just a tiny bit choosy. I really want my children settling close by and if I can find a Boro Park girl then Boro Park it’ll be.

Lakewood is out of the question for now.”

But the shadchan - he’s a bulldozer.

He spells the word no with a Y-E-S and just continues rattling off information on the girl’s family.

They’re such chashuve people, Chany is an outstanding baalos middos, the entire Palm Grove community loves them…

Wait a minute, did he say Palm Grove? They live on 17 Orchard Street? Oh my! That would be Pessy’s Chany. OKAY. Chany is a gem, I know that as a fact. Her mother too.

Oh boy. I can’t push this one under the rug just because we’ll be hitting the road too often. Noooo, this one is not your typical. We’ll have to think this through very seriously.

Pessy:

The Rav said that if Moishy was really okay with it then we should definitely go ahead, and it should be “in a gutte sha’ah”! So things are kind of falling into place.

Minna:

We’re on the road to an engagement.

Go ahead, blindfold me! L’chaim!

We all have goals.

Today, our goal is to cover it all up…

DESIGN: YANKY GOLDMAN

...with chocolate.

What’s Your Goal?

BloomsKosher.com

Nov. 6, 2019

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DIY Umbrella Stand It’s raining, it’s pouring, the leaves are constantly falling… That might not be the exact wording of the old rainy sing-song that kids have been singing for decades, but it surely describes autumn weather, and your front entrance and hallway, too. To keep wet stuff from making puddles all over the house, have fun creating a unique umbrella stand.

It needs only a few supplies and is super simple to make.

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You’ll need: • Wide PVC pipe • Paint or Rope • Glue gun (if using rope) • Plate/Flower pot dish Step 1. PVC pipes can be bought in a plumbing store and come in many sizes. Choose a width that will accommodate the number of umbrellas that are used on a steady basis. They are quite long and some plumbing stores will be able to cut them to the size you need.

Step 2. Decorate! While creativity has no limit, the following ideas are two simple and fun ways to decorate.

A) If you like the rope wrapped look, shop for a pretty rope in a color and texture you like. These can be found in craft or home improvement stores. Using hot glue, start at the bottom of the pipe and attach the end of the rope around the opening. Continue gluing and wrapping the rope neatly until you get to the other end. All done!

B) If you are good with your hands, you may want to get artsy and paint a design coordinating with your décor. It can be solid spray paint, or brushed acrylics. You can even do an abstract design with random strokes or splotches. Choose some pretty colors and enjoy the process. Allow to dry completely before handling.

Step 3. Your umbrella stand is now ready to display. To contain the water, you will need to set it on a pretty ceramic plate (you can find some great pieces in discount stores like Amazing Savings) or a flower pot dish. This will add to the beauty and make it easy for you to get rid of the water dripping from the umbrellas.

Nov. 6, 2019

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1

Too tired to wash a pot and a strainer?

Quit the hassle when you cook by boiling your pasta in a disposable aluminum pan.

When the timer rings, simply transfer the pan onto the racks in your sink and poke some holes in the aluminum with a fork.

The water will drain quickly, and you get a work-free dinner!

Whenever household chores become a conversation, you can be sure that laundry will be the conversation piece. Lighten your load by reading tip three, and keep the piles ‘out of sight, out of mind’ by utilizing tip two.

Happy washing!

Simple Solutions

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2

By the time you actually get to hang all that laundry, the laundry room / bedroom / wherever you dump the load is an unsightly mess.

Here's a neat way to hang those skirts.

Buy a shower rod identical to the one that supports the shower curtain.

Mount it parallel to the existing rod, over the middle of the tub. It’s too high to be an eyesore or obstacle when the shower is in use, but a perfect space saver when you want that laundry behind the curtain.

3

You don’t have to feel like the over-frequent customer in your uniform or men’s shirt store. Preserve your shirts by taking out the yellow perspiration stains as soon as they happen. Mix a solution of I tablespoon salt in one cup boiling water. Sponge onto the stain until it fades or disappears. Don’t forget to enjoy the savings!

5 Nov. 6, 2019

4

This piece of advice will have you breathe a sigh of relief, especially if you have a bunch of little girls. Ever noticed all those tiny dust balls and dandruff that make their home on the base of your hairbrush? Eliminate unsolicited particles by stretching a piece of unwearable tights over the bristles of a clean or new brush.

Maneuver it so that it lays flat on the brush’s base, and trim it to size. As soon as the brush needs a cleaning, simply lift off the stocking and replace it with a new one. (You might want to cut a few “brush filters” out of the same pair of tights before you throw it out, so you don’t get stuck every time you clean the brush.)

I never yet met anyone who doesn’t love their Shabbos lamp. If you do too, but would love it even more if it would emit a bit more light, revamp the lamp by replacing the bulb inside!

Sounds oversimplified, yet many people aren’t aware that the lamp uses a regular bulb. If you can’t unscrew the old bulb, you might need to take the whole appliance to the store with you, so they can do it with specialized tools.

6

It’s the season of leather and suede.

It’s also the season of scuffed shoes. Squirt toothpaste onto scuffmarks and rub them into the leather with a soft cloth until the shoe is wear – worthy again. | 31

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