Issuu on Google+

FREE JULY 17, 2013

THEVALLEYBEAT.COM

PHOTO BY: RACHEL LAYDEN

CELEBRITY NIGHT WITH RYAN CABRERA AT SANDS MOLTEN LOUNGE

LIKE THE BEAT

THE VALLEY’S HOTTEST WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE NEWSPAPER


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

Pie’s On Pizzeria (610) 264-7000

Did you have your piece today

www.piesonpizzeria

We Deliver! Monday (Closed)

Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday 11am-10pm Friday & Saturday 11am - 11pm Sunday 4pm - 10pm Front & Pine Streets Catasaqua, Pa 18032

JOIN US ON FACEBOOK www.facebook.com/thevalleybeat

Welcome To Our Brand New Renovated Location

PAGE 2

Conveniently located 1.5 miles From The Lehigh Valley Airport

BRAND NEW SERTA PILLOWTOP MATTRESSES

•FREE INTERNET • FREE BREAKFAST • GREAT NIGHTLY RATE • CENTRALLY LOCATED IN THE VALLEY • WALKING DISTANCE FROM STRATUS NIGHT CLUB & PLATINUM PLUS GENTLEMEN’S CLUB 1033 AIRPORT RD • ALLENTOWN PA 18103 • 610-434-9550


COVER: RYAN CABRERA 11 LOCAL BEAT

WWW.THEVALLEYBEAT.COM

GUIDE 5 NEWS OF THE WEIRD Weird, but true stories from here and around the globe

8 CONCERT BEAT

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

THIS WEEK

VOL.1 ISSUE 6ISSUE • OCTOBER 27 - NOV 2, 2010 148. JULY 17 - 23, 2013

Concert listings from many places

10 CLUB & PUBS

We are working on it but need your help please send info

BEAT 11 LOCAL Each week we comment on local or national talent.

12 HOT SHOTS

Maybe we snapped a pic of you, check it out!

TOPCrashSPINS & MOVIE REVIEW 15 Gina from The Bone’s Top 10 Radio Hits. & A movie review 16 Done ALBUM REVIEW by The Bone’s - Scotty Brilliant

FOR THE MEMORIES 21 THANKS Tyler Drake relenquishes his position, as he steps forward in life. We will miss you!

26 ZODIAC

Your astrology for the week

36 JOKES & COMICS

12 HOT SHOTS 39 MODEL BEAT 39

A few chuckles to get you through the week

MODEL BEAT Last, but certainly not least your model of the week

Welcome to The Valley Beat Newspaper! Lehigh Valley’s Hottest Alternative Newspaper. Distributed at more than 600 locations across the Lehigh Valley, Reading, Upper Bucks County & the Poconos Contact Information: Fax: 484-229-0506 thevalleybeat@gmail.com • valerie@thevalleybeat.com clubinfo@thevalleybeat.com • distribution@thevalleybeat.com classifieds@thevalleybeat.com

Please Note: The content in this paper does not necessarly represent the views of The Valley Beat Newspaper, Inc. Local Beat Bands That Rock, The Valley Beat are registered trademarks of the The Valley Beat Newspaper, Inc. Any content may not be reproduced without permission or written consent of The Valley Beat Newspaper, Inc. Local Beat - Bands That Rock are a Registered Trademark #3342218 within in the state of Pennsylvania. Any Material submitted becomes the property of The Valley Beat Newspaper, Inc. The Valley Beat reserves the right to refuse advertising or content. The Valley Beat is not liable for any errors discovered, or any changes after an ad has been printed.

Editor: Valerie L. Keiper Creative Director: Don Junz Model Beat: Donatelli Photography Contributor: Mitch | Columinists: Tyler Drake Camille Capriglione | Thienbao Nguyen

Cover Design: Don Junz Album Review: Scotty Brilliant Hot Shots: Rachel Marie Layden

For Advertising info contact: Don Junz (484) 293-1831 © The Valley Beat Newspaper, Inc. All Rights Reserved

PAGE 3

Join Us on Facebook: The Valley Beat

Direct all inquiries to: The Valley Beat • RR 1 Box 457 • Stroudsburg, PA 18360


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

Download the FREE 2013 Musikfest速 App for iPad速, iPhone速 and iPod touch速

musikfest.org

sands steel stage at PNC Plaza

PLus 500 free performances, 60 food vendors, 40 different brews and more: Buckwheat Zydeco Here Come the Mummies Igor & Red Elvises Southern Culture on the Skids Trout Fishing in America Gangstagrass The Abrams Brothers The Steel Wheels John Gorka Holly Williams Pearl and the Beard Caravan of Thieves Rick Estrin and The Nightcats The Dustbowl Revival The Guggenheim Grotto Leftover Cuties Lucy Kaplansky Dala M.A.K.U SoundSystem The Amish Outlaws Ball in the House Daylight New Sweden Quiet Company The Wiyos Los Straitjackets Sarah Ayers Band Enter the Haggis Boogie Wonder Band Start Making Sense Mama Jama

Page 4

and more!

BETHLEHEM


by Chuck Shepherd

LEAD STORY - COMMUNITY ACTIVISM

POLICE REPORT

--Despite Chicago’s recent crisis of gang-related street murders, the Roseland Community Hospital in a tough south-side neighborhood is on the verge of closing because of finances, and community groups have been energetically campaigning to keep it open. Joining civic leaders in the quest is the Black Disciples street gang, whose co-founder Don Acklin begged in June for the hospital to remain open, explaining, “It’s bad enough we’re out here harming each other.” Besides wounded gang members needing emergency care, said Acklin, closing would amount to “genocide” because of all the innocent people exposed to crossfire.

--Rewarding the Breast Disguises: (1) An April crime report in San Francisco, noting

THINGS PEOPLE BELIEVE

with, according to Colombia Reports news service, “impressive” breast implants, but

--Suspicions Confirmed: A warehouse in Landover, Md., maintained by a company working on contract for the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency,

that a female driver had rammed another car in a parking-space dispute, noted that the victim gave officers little help. The man could not tell officers the model car that hit him, and certainly not a license plate number, but he “was able to give a detailed description of the suspect’s cleavage.” No arrest was reported. (2) Colombian prisoner Giovanni Rebolledo was serving a 60-year sentence (as a member of the “Los Topos” gang charged with extortion, kidnapping and torture) when he escaped and decided on an extreme identity change in order to move about in the country. He became “Rosalinda,” complete nonetheless was identified in May in a routine traffic stop and arrested. --In Kobe, Japan, in May, an unemployed, 32-year-old man carried out a minor theft

contained “secret rooms” of furniture and equipment described as “man caves”

(stealing a wallet from a parked scooter) apparently just to be locked up in the world

for company employees. The EPA inspector general announced the discovery

famous city. Besides being the home of Kobe beef, it is acclaimed for its French, Chinese

in May, and the government confiscated TVs, refrigerators, couches, personal

and octopus cuisines, and in fact, Kobe’s Nagata Ward Precinct is renowned for the

photos, pin-ups, magazines and videos that the contractor’s personnel brought

special gourmet boxed meals prepared by local bento shops, delivered daily to prisoners,

in while ostensibly “working” on agency business.

which the thief said was foremost on his mind.

--Scotland’s Parliament was revealed in May to be considering, as part of its

--More Time Needed on the Firing Range: In May, an Orlando Sentinel columnist

Children and Young People Bill, guaranteeing that specific, named persons

demanded a federal investigation into the 2010 police killing of Torey Breedlove in

would be appointed for every Scottish child at birth, charged with overseeing that child’s welfare until adulthood. A Daily Telegraph story acknowledged that the bill is “remarkably vague” about the duties and powers of the designated persons and thus it is unclear how the law might affect typical parent-child relationships. --Update: “(Supermodels) is the one exception (to U.S. immigration policy) that we all scratch our heads about,” said a Brookings Institution policy analyst, speaking to Bloomberg Businessweek in May. Foreign-born sports stars and en-

Orlando’s Pine Hills neighborhood, noting that killing the unarmed Breedlove somehow required 137 shots, with cops missing on at least 115. The columnist added that the Justice Department is currently investigating a Cleveland, Ohio, case in which local police killed two unarmed men but coincidentally also required 137 shots. (In both cases, the officers were exonerated after local investigators determined the officers believed the suspects were armed.)

CREME DE LA WEIRD

--Whitby, U.K., town councilman Simon Parkes, 58, confessed to a reporter in June that he had had an extramarital affair -- in fact, an extraterrestrial extramarital affair -- with the

tertainers are fast-tracked with American work permits under one system, but

9-foot-tall Cat Queen, and that she had born him a child. Parkes said the Cat Queen is biding

supermodels were excluded from that and must thus compete (successfully, it

her time until technology is available to bring her and the child to Earth. Said Parkes, “There

turns out) with physicists and nuclear engineers to earn visas among the 65,000

are plenty of people in my position who don’t choose to come out and say it because they are

slots available only to “skilled workers with college degrees.” As such, around

terrified it will destroy their careers.” Parkes said his wife knows about his periodic meetings

250 beauties are admitted every year. (The most recent attempt to get super-

with the Cat Queen and is “very unhappy, clearly.”

models their own visa category was championed in 2005 and 2007 by, appropri-

RECURRING THEMES

ately, then-U.S.-Rep. Anthony Weiner of New York.)

--Least Competent Criminals: Shaun Paneral was questioned by police in Carlsbad, N.M., in

--In Lytle, Texas, in May, just 33 people voted for candidates for three openings

May, on a loud-music complaint and, concerned that he already had an outstanding arrest

on the school board, including the only voter who cast a ballot in District 1.

warrant, gave his name as “Shaun Paul.” Paneral thus became the most recent perp to choose

Christina Mercado was the 1-0 winner, but someone else voted for her. Mercado

his alias badly. “Shaun Paul,” whoever he is, is also wanted by police in New Mexico, and Pane-

cannot vote for District 1 candidates because she does not live there, and neither does the one candidate who opposed her. However, according to Texas law, Mer-

ral was arrested for the false ID. --It’s Good to Be a Dog in the First World: The British company Paw Seasons has created

cado can legally represent District 1 on the school board.

a holiday for dogs (surely to appeal to guilt-ridden owners who leave them behind on their

with dog-friendly Hollywood movies, trips to the beach, surfing “lessons,” spa and grooming

own holidays) priced at the equivalent of $73,000, consisting of a private suite for two weeks, treatment (including pedicure) by Harrod’s, outfits from Louis Vuitton, Bottega Veneta, and Mulberry, and the piece de resistance -- a personal dog house created in the image of the owner’s own house.

PAGE 5

(Are you ready for News of the Weird Pro Edition? Every Monday at http://NewsoftheWeird.blogspot.com and www.WeirdUniverse.net. Other handy addresses: WeirdNews at earthlink dot net, and P.O. Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679.) COPYRIGHT 2013 CHUCK SHEPHERD DISTRIBUTED BY UNIVERSAL UCLICK 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, Mo. 64106

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

NEWS OF THE WEIRD


Page 6

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

PAGE 7


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

CONCERT BEAT

CHAMELEON CLUB, Lancaster, PA TICKETS 717-393-7713

Street Light Manifesto, Jul 11 Black Stone Cherry, Jul 16 Toy Soldiers, Jul 26 Black Noise Glow A Party, Jul 27

TICKETS 212-307-7171 Rod Stewart, Dec 9

CROCODILE ROCK, Allentown, PA TICKETS 610-434-4600

MAUCH CHUNK OPERA HOUSE, Jim Thorpe, PA TICKETS 570-325-0249 Tod Snider, Jul 19 Incendido, Jul 20 Bennie & the Jets, Jul 26

MOHEGAN SUN ARENA AT CASEY PLAZA, Wilkes Barre, PA TICKETS 570-920-7600

MOUNT AIRY CASINO RESORT, Mount Pocono TICKETS 877-682-4791

Thunder from Down Under, Jul 5-Aug 31 Kansas, Aug 11 Jeff Ross, Sep 14

Carly Rae Jepsen, Aug 2 One Republic, Aug 3 Skillet, Aug 4

Beyonce, Jul 25 Black Sabbath, Aug 10 Frampton’s Guitar Circus, Aug 5 George Thorogood Styx & Foreigner, Aug 7 KC & The Sunshine Band, Aug 8 Darius Rucker, Aug 9 Ke$ha, Aug 10 Avenged Sevenfold, Aug 11

SHERMAN THEATER, Stroudsburg, PA Page 8

TICKETS 570-420-280 Mac Miller, Jul 11 Dave Mason, Jul 18 Christian Porter, Jul 19 Stavenfest, Jul 20

IRVING PLAZA, New York, NY

TICKETS 212-777-6800 Psychadelic Furs, Aug 3 Parachute, Aug 13 Baroness, Aug 14 Adam Ant, Aug 16-17

MAIN GATE, Allentown SOVEREIGN CENTER,PAReading, PA TICKETS TICKETS610-898-7200 610-898-7200

Sevendust, n Manson,Jul Jun2518• SickPuppies, Aug 18

THE ELECTRIC FACTORY, Philadelphia, PA TICKETS (215) 627-1332 RX Bandits, Jul 19 Bens Summer Bender, Aug 3 This is Hard Core, Aug 8-11 Fall Out Boy, Sep 8 City and Colour, Sep 18

TICKETS 800-745-3000

Ed Kowalczyk (Of Live), Jul 19 Tony Bennett, Jul 26 Anti-Social Comedy Tour, Jul 20 Bad Company, Jul 29 Seth Meyers, Jul 31 Family Feud Live, Aug 2 - 4 (PP’d) Godsmack, Aug 7 Jay Leno, Aug 11 Danzig with Doyle, Aug 13 Abba, Aug 15 The Wanted, Aug 24

Gabriel Iglesias, Aug 29 Hanson, Sep 2 Stone Temple Pilots, Sep 4 Russell Brand, Sep 14 Sarah Brightman, Sep 22 Steely Dan, Sep 27 Jeff Foxworthy, Sep 28 Kathy Griffin, Oct 4 Celtic Thunder, Oct 9

HERSHEY PARK ARENA, Hershey Park, PA TICKETS 717-534-3911

Matchbox 20 /Goo Goo Dolls, Aug 14

TOYOTA PAVILLION Montage Mountain - Scranton, PA TICKETS (570) 961-9000

Lil’ Wayne, Jul 21 Uproar Tour: Alice In Chains / Janes Addicition, Aug 9 The Peach Festival, Aug 15-18

TROCADERO, Philadelphia, PA TICKETS (215) 922-5483 They Live, Jul 21 Summer Slaughter Tour, Aug 4 Sadat, Aug 8 Scott Weiland, Aug 17 DropKick Murphy’s, Aug 21 Kamelot, Sep 5 Peter Hook & The Light, Sep 14 Atoms For Peace, Sep 24

1409 N. 9th St

TICKETS 215-336-3600

TICKETS 610-332-1300

TICKETS 877-686-5366

SANDS EVENT CENTER Bethlehem, PA

REVERB - Reading, PA

WELLS FARGO CENTER Philadelphia, PA MUSIKFEST / CAFE Bethlehem, PA

SUSQUEHANNA BANK CENTER Camden, NJ Lynyrd Skynyrd & Bad Company, Jul 17 Rockstar Energy Mayhem Fest w/ Rob Zombie, Jul 19 Lil’ Wayne, Jul 20 Gigan Tour, Aug 9

Great White, Aug 13 Bullet Boys, Aug 15 Upstart Fest, Sep 13 Blood on the Dance Floor, Sep 26

The Eagles, Jul 16 Justin Bieber, Jul 17

MADISON SQUARE GARDEN New York, NY

Electric Hot Tuna, Jul 25 Kansas, Aug 11 We The Kings, Aug 14 Stroudfest, Aug 31

(610) 743-3069 Shooter Jennings, Jul 7 Revocation, Jul 14 Nine Days, Jul 26 Kix, Aug 17 Bam Margera w/ Hed Pe, Aug 23

KESWICK THEATRE, Glenside, PA TICKETS 215-572-7650

Buddy Guy, Jul 30 Philadelphia Rock & Blues Fest, Aug 14 Adam Ant, Aug 15 Gad Elmaleh, Sep 12

PENNS PEAK, Jim Thorpe, PA TICKETS 570-325-0371

Phil Lesh & Friends, Jul 24 Wine on the Mountain, Jul 27-28 Philadelphia Rock & Blues Fest, Aug 14 Adam Ant, Aug 15

CHECK OUT MAYHEM FEST W/ ROB ZOMBIE SUSQUEHANNA BANK CENTER IN CAMDEN FRIDAY


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

rs 7 Doo

PM

Doors 7 PM

Maingate Nightclub

448 N. 17th Street, Allentown, PA (610) 776-7711

PAGE 9

Tix for all shows at Ticketmaster.com, Call 800.745.3000, All Ticketmaster Locations & at each venue’s box office VISIT FACEBOOK.COM/SLPCONCERTS OR SLPCONCERTS.NET


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

CLUBS AND PUBS ALLENTOWN

Jabber Jaws Bar & Grille 1327 Chew St Allentown, PA 610-432-6524

Tilted Kilt 2835 Lehigh St 610-791-2100 Grumpy’s BBQ Roadhouse 3000 Mauch Chunk Rd 610-769-4600 7/19 Don Hoffman 7/20 Hoozya Daddy Rascals Pub & Afterdark Lounge 6616 Ruppsville Rd 610-366-1130 Pitchers Sports Bar & Grill 570 Union Boulevard 610-841-4001 Friday: Live Entertainment

Sands Bethlehem Molten Lounge 511 E. 3rd Street 484-777-7777 7/17 DJ Bis & DJ Aaron 7/18 Green Line Bound 7/19 UUU 7/20 No Where Slow 7/21 Billy Bauer Band 7/22 Emily’s Toybox 7/23 Jay Allan Ultimate

BATH

Roosevelt’s 21st 25 E. Elizabeth Ave (610) 266-1950 1/2 Price Apps Thur DJ Jamal Knight

Cornerstone Pub 506 Penn St 610-837-6670 7/27 Scott Marshall ??Clam Bake Coming! Godfrey Daniels 7 E. Fourth St 610-867-2390 BETHLEHEM 7/17 July Improv Bar With No Name 7/19 Bakithi Kumalo 7/21 Open Mike 300 Gateway Drive 7/23 July Ramble 610-866-5800 Fridays: DJ Cap Cee Saturdays: DJ Trama MacGrady’s 117 E. Third St 610-868-8925 Wednesday: Trivia Thursday: DJ@10pm Sat: Acoustic Entertainment

Funhouse 5 E. Fourth Street 610-868-5311 7/17 Tavern Tan Band Stratus Night Club 1193 Airport Road 7/18 Serene Green 610-776-2090 7/19 Goat Wizard Wednesday: Karaoke 7/20 Annual Pigroast 7/26 Stratus Goes 7/21 Zach Martin Trio Platinum Benefit 7/22 Open Mic 7/23 The Vowels Strange Brew Tavern Diamondz 1996 S. Fifth St 1913 W Broad St 610-841-3610 Monday: Pong night Bethlehem, Pa 18018 610 865 1028 Sunday: Open mic Monday: Jukebox 7/19 Harkland Thursday: Karaoke 7/20 Traction Fri & Sat: Dance club/ Karaoke Roosevelt’s 21st 1328 W. Tilghman St Sunday: Karaoke (610) 770-1444 Mon - Fri 1/2 price Bethlehem Brew apps Live Music 4-7 Works Live Entertainment 569 Main St Tim Harakal / Billy 610-882-1300 Patrick / Strange Coincidence & More Vision Bar @ Sands 7/20 3 Moons Event Center 77 Sands Boulevard Jetport Lounge 610-297-7410 3400 Airport Rd. 7/19 M-80 Allentown, Pa 7/20 DJ Cap Cee 610-266-1000 Wednesdays: 6-12am Tally Ho DJ Jimmy K 205 W. Fourth St Fridays: 610-865-2591 Mike Mitman

Hoozya Daddy 7/20 Grumpy’s BBQ Allentown, PA

M-80 7/19 Vision Bar Sands Event Center Bethlehem, PA

CATASAQUA

Blue Monkey Sports Restaurant 1092 Howertown Rd 610-266-1550

COOPERSBURG

Tavern Tan Band 7/17 Funhouse Bethlehem, PA

Silhouettes Showbar & Gentlemen’s Club 111 E. Station Ave (Right off 309) 610-282-8010 Thu Pool Tourney 8pm

BARTONSVILLE

The Pocono Pub Rt. 611, Bartonsville 570-421-5743 Monday: Open Mic Tues, Thurs, Sun: Karaoke 7/17 The SC Duo 7/20 Angel Down

EASTON

Spanky’s East 1700 Butler St 610-559-5170 Tues: Texas Hold Em’ Drinky’s 3 Centre St Sq 610-252-3800 9/14 Skate Jam Porter’s Pub 700 Northampton St. 610-250-6561 7/10 Irish Jam 7/11 Chris Cummings Standards Trio 7/12 Trevor Extor 7/13 Adam Marshland

3 Moons 7/20 Roosevelt’s 21st Allentown, PA

MORE ON PAGE 26

Page 10

Main Gate 17 W. Liberty Street 610-776-7711 Friday Night: Noche Latina Saturday: Classique 80’s, 90’s music

The Brewworks Restaurant & Brewery 812-816 W Hamilton St 610-433-7777 Tuesday: Comedy Wednesday: Trivia Thursday: Karaoke Friday: Office Party Saturday: Guided Tours


A STAR-SPANGLED SOUTH BETHLEHEM TWO-FER

THE THE VALLEY VALLEY BEAT BEAT JULY JULY 17, 10, 2013 2013

by: Mitch

Waiting for Rain at The Funhouse- from left: Don Andreas, Steve Herring, Paul Kleinert, Jeff Larish

7/5/13 - WAITING FOR RAIN REUNION SHOW AT THE FUNHOUSE Whew! I have some catching up to do! It was a crazy Fourth of July two weeks ago but I would be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge some great live performances on the South Side of Bethlehem over the extended holiday weekend. After a 15 year absence from the Lehigh Valley music scene, Waiting for Rain treated their longtime fans to a onetime reunion show at The Funhouse. This one was for all the marbles. The Funhouse’s motto is “Where Fun People Meet and Party” and I couldn’t agree more as the joint was packed with party people ready to recapture a little nostalgia from the 90s. I have to admit that I, too, was captivated by the pomp and circumstance surrounding the band’s reemergence - as if they were the rock-n-roll equivalent of this year’s brood of conspicuously absent Cicadas. Whereas the Cicadas were disappointing no-shows, Waiting for Rain stole the show at The Funhouse. They showered their fans with an energetic 80 minute set of rocking originals gleaned from their discography from ‘88-’98. There were no discernible signs of rust as they rocked and rolled with The Funhouse crowd dancing and singing along as long-lost lyrics were instantly recalled by many in attendance. And that, in a nutshell, was what this show was all about.

Nyke Van Wyk and Craig Thatcher at Levitt Pavilion SteelStacks on July 6

The Sofa Kings at Levitt Pavilion SteelStacks on July 6

7/6/13 - CRAIG THATCHER & FRIENDS/SOFA KINGS“LEVITT”ATE What could be more American than baseball or apple pie? How about free concerts over the 4th of July weekend at Levitt Pavilion SteelStacks? On Saturday, July 6, the patriotic throng that amassed at SteelStacks could’ve easily been mistaken for a sweltering and thirsty early August Musikfest Americaplatz crowd and as such, served as a dress rehearsal for ArtsQuest for the upcoming ten day musical extravaganza. The Craig Thatcher Band with some special guests elicited several standing ovations from a diverse audience of music lovers during their ninety minute set. Thatcher was joined by fellow blues rocker Mike Dugan, Nyke Van Wyk on electric violin, Wayde Leonard on bass and vocals, Don Plowman on drums, Craig Kastelnik on keyboards, Pat Kastelnik on percussion and backing vocals and Gio Gomez also on percussion. CTB band was firing on all cylinders from the opener, a funked-up version of “Superstition”, with Kastelnik’s soulful vocals hitting all the right notes. Kastelnik’s piano intro for Jethro Tull’s “Locomotive Breath” got the crowd fired up and the band hit full throttle when Wayde Leonard began to sing forcefully. Ian Anderson would’ve been proud of Leonard’s effort. Craig Thatcher on acoustic guitar partnered up with Nyke Van Wyk on electric violin for an original Celtic composition that was well-received. It was appropriate to try it out on the Levitt audience since they’re on tour in Ireland this week. These two musicians are simply simpatico with each other and Irish audiences are going to love the Celtic collaboration between the two.

spacey electric violin solo which preceded CTB’s showstopping cover of Led Zeppelin’s “Kashmir.” Sofa Kings’ lead guitarist Jeff Larson and I briefly chatted while the Craig Thatcher Band was still playing to which he quizzically remarked, “And we have to follow those guys?” And follow they did! The Sofa Kings are a 10-piece classic rock/dance party band from Philadelphia and they were more than up to the challenge of following Lehigh Valley favorite Thatcher and company. Sofa Kings had just opened for Heart at the Susquehanna Bank Center on July 3 so they were prepared for a large crowd at Levitt. They orchestrated a tight two hour set beginning with Chicago’s “Beginnings” as the horn section stretched its muscles. Guitarist/lead vocalist Matt Perkins sang it beautifully and the horns and percussion closed it out strongly. Throughout the evening, the dance-happy crowd was treated to covers of The Temptations, Kenny Loggins, Bruce Springsteen, The Rolling Stones, The Doors, Michael Jackson and Lynyrd Skynyrd among others. They played a wide variety of tunes from different genres and eras and played them exceedingly well. The deliberate mondegreen (look that up in your Funk & Wagnalls) that is “Sofa Kings” shouldn’t prevent you from seeing these guys play great rock, Motown, soul and funk. I didn’t get the joke at first until I was told about it. But I do give this band high marks for high energy, excellent musicianship and a sincere desire to entertain their audiences and create a party atmosphere. They’ll be back in the Lehigh Valley in a couple of weeks. The Sofa Kings will perform at Festplatz on the first day of Musikfest, Friday, August 2 at 6:00.

The band covered The Allmans, Santana, Joe Cocker and Derek and the Dominos but their soul rock cover of Sly and the Family Stone’s “I Want to Take You Higher” prompted many in the crowd to make their way to the Mitch has been on the air rockin’ the Lehigh Valley for eighteen front of the stage to cut a concrete rug years and has been with The Hawk for the last eleven years! despite oppressive heat and humidity. Tune in weeknights for Classic Rock of the 70’s, 80’s and more! Listen Saturdays for great giveaways including free concert tickets It was like 21st century Soul Train up for great area shows! To have your band reviewed please contact me at: there. All we needed was Don Cornelius. mitch999thehawk@gmail.com The encore featured a Nyke Van Wyk PANTONE 485 CVU

PANTONE Process Yellow CVU PANTONE Reflex Blue C PANTONE 1395 CVC

PAGE1111 PAGE

I don’t know if they will ever reunite to perform again. This show was originally conceived as a once and done proposition but you never know. Should they decide to regroup for more shows, count me in!


Page 12

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

T T H H G I G I L L S S R R O O O C CO S S L L R I R I G G

FEATURES Hammerhead Lounge Starters Pub

Fridays $1.50 Drafts $2.25 Pints All Day Everyday

Leons

Wednesday $3 Pitchers 10-12am

Revolutions

$3 Drafts Happy Hour 5-7pm

Keystone Pub Bethlehem

$2.25 Drafts All Day Everyday

Roosevelts 21st Allentown Hops Fogelsville Hotel Sunset Grille

Linx

Saturday $2 Drafts $3 Drafts All Day Everyday Friday and Saturday $2 Pints

The Valley Coors Girls

PAGE 13

Follow us @LVCoorsGirls

Friday $2.00 Drafts $2 Drafts All Day Everyday

Blue Monkey Sport Bar Rivals

$1.50 Coors Light Drafts


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

4 E. 4th St • BETHLEHEM, PA • 610-868-1313

www.mollysbethlehem.com

24 Taps

www.strangebrewtavern.co 610-841-3610

Featuring a wide array of domestic, import, micro & craft Brews Entertainment This Week: Friday July 19 – Harkland Saturday July 20 – Traction

WAT CH A L THE GAM L HER ES E

Monday - Friday 4 - 6pm $6 Martini Happy Hour Trivia Thursdays 8 - 10pm $50 - 1st Place $25 - 2nd Place

Kitchen open 11am til Midnight

Open 7 days a week 11am - 2am

strangebrew610

1996 S. Fifth St Allentown

(corner of S. 5th St & Emaus Ave)

1731 Airport Road • Allentown, PA 610-403-4600 • www.copperheadgrille.com

Sunday, July 21, 6-8pm McDonald’s

Page 14

Cedar Crest Blvd in Allentown

t Pints h g i L s r o $2.50lCDoay Everyday! Al


BROUGHT TO YOU BY

1

2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

TRENCHES

POP EVIL ONYX

LIFT ME UP W/ ROB HALFORD FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH THE WRONG SIDE OF HEAVEN &

THE RIGHTEOUS SIDE OF HELL, VOL 1

STONE

ALICE IN CHAINS THE DEVIL PUT DINOSAURS HERE

THE HANGMAN’S BODY COUNT

PLOT: When a race of giant monsters, dubbed “Kaiju” arise from the sea, mankind’s only hope are the “Jaegers”, giant robots operated by two or three pilots who are linked by a psychic connection called “The Drift”. When his brother is killed during a drift, pilot Raleigh (Charlie Hunnam) drops out of the Jaeger program, only to be brought back into the fold five years later by his former commander, Stacker (Idris Elba), as the Jaegers face an apocalyptic standoff with the Kaiju. REVIEW: Sometimes people just opt to dump on a movie for no reason. PACIFIC RIM- despite coming from genre maestro Guillermo Del Toro- has been all but christened the next big flop by the press, despite the fact that the reviews have been overwhelmingly positive (and not just from the fanboys either). Especially funny are the reviews that call the premise “dumb” or “unbelievable”. I mean come-on people! Isn’t this supposed to be fantasy? And why are superheroes and alien robots defending humanity perfectly acceptable, while giant monsters from the sea are not? What’s the criteria for “good” fantasy, and “bad” fantasy?

VOLBEAT OUTLAW GENTLEMEN & SHADY LADIES

OUT OF TIME W/ CHESTER BENNINGTON

STONE TEMPLE PILOTS

SWERVE CITY

DEFTONES

KOI NO YOKAN

CAME BACK HAUNTED NINE INCH NAILS

HESITATION MARKS

HOWL

BEWARE OF DARKNESS ORTHODOX

I’LL FOLLOW YOU

SHINEDOWN AMARYLIS

THERE’S NO GOING BACK SICK PUPPIES CONNECT

“How is the story?” Again I say this- it’s a movie about giant robots fighting giant monsters! Don’t go in expecting social commentary, or twists and turns (this isn’t ZERO DARK THIRTY people, nor is it supposed to be). It’s all about the spectacle, and in a summer filled with eye candy, I guarantee you none have come close to what PACIFIC RIM offers. The gorgeous lensing by DP Guillermo Navarro, which is best appreciated in IMAX 3D, is comparable to Wally Pfister’s work with Nolan, or what Roger Deakins did for SKYFALL. As for the performances, here’s the thing. Everyone does exactly what they’re supposed to. Del Toro’s got a big heart, and just like he brought heart to HELLBOY he does the same for PACIFIC RIM. Nowhere is that more apparent than the idea of “drifting” with it only working if the two people involved actually have an emotional connection. This means the best pilots are usually parents and their (grown) children, people that are married or in love, or siblings. Giving us characters that care about each other makes us care about them. Some critics are picking on Charlie Hunnam, but I don’t really get this as to me he was totally charismatic, and made a likable hero (not to mention that fact that the ladies LOVE the guy). Our leading female heroine Rinko Kikuchi is absolutely adorable, and the bond that springs up between her and Hunnam feels well-thought out and never tacked on. Meanwhile, Idris Elba is a full-on movie-star as their tough commander with a heart of gold (natch), while Ron Perlman shows up later in the film to steal every scene he’s in as an unscrupulous black-marketeer comic relief Charlie Day (toned down) has to turn to in an hour of need. No matter how much I slather over PACIFIC RIM, many are still not going to give it a shot as for some reason the premise seems to offend people. Again, I ask, how is this any dumber than any other tentpole movie that’s already come out this summer? People are too cynical, and this isn’t a movie for cynics. Del Toro’s only goal here is to entertain and make you feel like a kid again. People are seemingly looking for any reason to pick on PACIFIC RIM, but do yourselves a favour. Forget all the negative press and stories about its budget, tracking, etc. The only important question is whether or not PACIFIC RIM is entertaining. I’m here to tell you that not only is the answer to that a definite “hell yes” but PACIFIC RIM is just about the most fun I’ve had at the movies since SKYFALL. As much as I liked STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS and MAN OF STEEL, I think PACIFIC RIM has them beat.

PAGE 15

10

By Chris Bumbray

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

Movie Review

GINA CRASH’S TOP 10


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

Well I am back from vacation, unfortunately. It’s crazy how fast time flies when you’re sitting on a beach sipping Pina Coladas in Mexico. On the second to last day of vacation, and before drinking copious amount of Tequila and passing out on the balcony of my room, I was rocking out on the beach, listening to Hawthorne Heights’ debut album The Silence in Black and White on my Ipod. This inspired me to review their new album, Zero, which dropped a week ago.

The album begins with a short acoustic song called “Skeletons Remain (Transmission 1). After the brief acoustic intro, “Memories of Misery,” kicks things up a notch with a fast paced punk style unlike the band’s earlier emo days. This is definitely one you can rock out to! Hawthorne Heights quickly transition to a heavier, darker feel on the third track (and aptly titled), “Darkside.” Next up is my favorite song from the album, “Spark.” This song exemplifies the catchy hooks that made Hawthorne Heights popular almost a decade ago. “Zero,” the title track, was kind of a let down. Vocalist JT Woodruff’s voice was a little too whiny in this one, although it did start to pick up towards the end. Make sure you skip over what I’m assuming is a public service announcement from Hawthorne Heights, called “Coalition of Alternate Living Methods (Broadcast).” I’m not sure what they were trying to accomplish on this one, it’s

By: Scotty Brilliant By:Scotty ScottyBrilliant Brilliant By:

just filler and a complete waste of a track. Good thing the next two songs pick the album back up again, with “Put Me Back Together,” even throwing in some gang vocals and screams at the end. “Ghost Town” was one of the songs I listened to in the car on my way home from The Bone studio. I made a mental note to mention the lyrics in my review because I thought they were poignant. In the pre-chorus, Woodruff sings, “Sometimes you have to end to start again / my friend / in often times / you don’t know where to begin.” “Taken by the Dark” takes me back to the old screamo days of Hawthorne Heights. And now for my Crank It and Skip It picks: Crank It Memories of Misery Darkside Spark Anywhere But Here Put Me Back Together

Taken by the Dark Skip It Skeletons Remain (Transmission 1) Coalition of Alternate Living Methods (Broadcast) Zero Hallow Hearts Unite Over and Out (Transmission 2) Other than a few weird “filler” tracks, I really enjoyed Zero. I think Hawthorne Heights have come a long way from their humble emo beginnings. Now I sit here, still in vacation mode, trying to think of a witty way to end my review. Ah screw it, instead I will just steal a comment that I saw on YouTube regarding the new album. Brandon Gomez, said “I love the new album, it’s a mix of every single thing they’ve ever made,” and I couldn’t agree more. Thanks dude, I owe you one.

Scotty Brilliant is the Afternoon Drive Personality on The Valley’s Real Rock Station, 107 The Bone. Hit Scotty up for a Road Rage or Work Release Friday request, or let him know if there is a new album you want him to review! Find him on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/ScottyBrilliant.

PAGE 16

Page 16

To be honest, I kind of lost track of Hawthorne Heights over the years. They gained fame when MTV began playing the video for the band’s signature song, “Ohio Is for Lovers,” in 2004. This propelled The Silence in Black and White to peak at #56 on the Billboard top 200 chart and #1 on the Billboard Heatseekers Albums chart. The album has also been certified gold, selling approximately 816, 483 in the US. Hawthorne Heights found continued success with their sophomore album, If Only You Were Lonely, debuting at #3 on the Billboard charts. A year and a half later tragedy struck the band, with the sudden death of rhythm guitarist and backup singer/ screamer, Casey Calvert. Calvert’s death was ruled accidental resulting from a mixture of an anti-depressant, a seizure medication and a painkiller, a combination rarely fatal. Lead guitarist, Micah Carli, stepped up to the plate to provide the unclean backing vocals for the bands’ live performances. Hawthorne Heights then went on to release two more albums, which failed to garner the same attention as their first two. This is also about the time that I stopped listening to them. However, I now have a renewed faith in the Ohio-based quintet with the release of Zero.

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

ALBUM REVIEW ALBUM REVIEW


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

PAGE 17


Page 18

WATCH FOR CLAM BAKE COMING!

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

PAGE 19


Page 20

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013


MeMories

THE THEVALLEY VALLEYBEAT BEAT JULY JULY10, 17, 2013 2013

thanks For the by Tyler Drake Lehigh Valley, it has been fun. Nearly three years ago, I responded to a craigslist advertisement for a local beat w r i t e r to cover the casino and bar scene. Researching the first article I wrote, I “shared tall beer cans with two local vagabonds” to try to find out how Bethlehem’s homeless felt about a change in housing policy at Moravian. That first winter, I visited the Funhouse — a place that “may be so much fun not despite its dive status but because of it” — and Molly’s Irish Grille and MacGrady’s, and I described craps, poker, baccarat, and blackjack. I detailed a north-side dead-of-winter pub crawl that began at Mach’s Gute and ended with sleeping outside by Old York Road. This gig has been a ton of fun. I have tried to use the opportunity to write columns that use the conventions of pretentious journalism and high prose to disguise vulgar jokes — like inviting guests to a dinner party and launching cartoon penises at them. Along this line, I once recommended the following drink: “a jigger of expensive cognac dropped from a reasonable height into ice-cold Bud Light: the taste blasts down your gullet with such sublime subtlety and decadent nuance that slamming the glass on the bar and wiping your face with the back of your hand after chugging it will inspire minutes of marvel at the view from taste’s highest tower or minaret or whatever.” I met people living on construction sites, tasted Four Loko using the procedures for trying fine wine, dodged cops, hung out at every dive bar in the Valley, camped out with the Occupy people, listened to Gwar and watched weiner-dog races, got lessons in bar-room pool, interviewed Sixers star Evan Turner, conversed with a Nobel laureate, survived hurricanes and earthquakes, ate tremendous multicourse meals with beer pairings, and just generally had a good time and wrote about it. At the Celtic Classic, I combined absurd consonance, penile humor, and bits of ‘Ode To A Haggis’ to write of the caber toss: “a gaggle of ginger girls giggle and angle for an up-kilt glimpse, hoping to see a sweaty flesh metronome keeping time as the trembling earth resounds after a withering toss from a haggis-fed hero.” I called out Greg Parks of American Traffic Solutions, a company trying to sell red-light cameras to Easton, as a minion of Satan. Every year that I have been writing for the Valley Beat, I feel like the place has become culturally more interesting. The opening of the Musikfest Café and the Mint and the Wooden Match, the Musikfest moving to the south side, meth labs exploding, mayor moving on and a mayoral candidate allegedly making sex tapes, and an Allentown resident taking home a Grammy have all happened on my watch and been reported. Wine kiosks debuted at Wegman’s and were shut down [“these hulking racks of wine bottles asked users to swipe a valid driver’s license to prove their age and to breathe onto an alcohol sensor to demonstrate sobriety (somehow few customers balked at blowing a robot)”]. The casino has expanded and started allowing table games and opened a hotel.

PAGE PAGE2121

So with this last, horribly indulgent column I am signing off. I thank the Valley Beat for giving me the opportunity to have a paying platform for what has been essentially lunacy masquerading as journalism. I’m gone for now, but, Lehigh Valley, maybe I will see you at the next Musikfest? Cheers.


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

NOW

! E E R F SMOKE

43 CRAFT - DRAFTS ON TAP 25 CRAFT - WINGS 70 CRAFT - BURGERS EVERY SATURDAY - BUY ONE BURGER GET ONE FREE!

ICE - COLD PITCHERS - ALL DAY EVERYDAY

$7 $8

COORS LIGHT / LABATT / BLUE MOON SAM ADAMS & ANGRY ORCHARD

Page 22

NIGHTLY ENTERTAINMENT Wednesdays - Trivia Night Thursdays - DJ Thursday starting at 10PM Every Friday & Saturday - Live Acoustic Music


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

THIS WEEKEND THEATER LISTINGS AMC TILGHMAN 8 TILGHMAN SQUARE ALLENTOWN (610) 391-0772

FRANK BANKO ALEHOUSE CINEMAS STEELSTACKS ONE FOUNDERS WAY BETHLEHEM 610-297-7111

BECKY’S DRIVE IN Rt. 248 BERLINSVILLE http://www.beckysdi.com/

MAHONING VALLEY CINEMA CARBON PLAZA MALL LEHIGHTON 610-377-8626 http://mvcinema.com/

CARMIKE 16 1700 CATASAUQUA RD ALLENTOWN 610-264-9624 http://www.carmike.com/

MAHONING DRIVE-IN Rt 443 LEHIGHTON 570-645-6204

CARMIKE PROMENADE & IMAX 2805 CENTER VALLEY PARKWAY SAUCON VALLEY 610-709-8635 CIVIC’S THEATER 514 514 N. 19th St ALLENTOWN

6. Monsters University 7. World War Z 8. White House Down 9. Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain 10. Man of Steel

July 26th, 2013

NEW DVD RELEASES

1. 42 2. Evil Dead 3. Bullet to the Head 4. The End of Love 5. Erased

6. Alphas: Season 2 7. Femme Fatales: Season 2 8. Solomon Kane 9. Hell on Wheels: Season 2 10. Orphan Black: Season 1

PAGE 23

1. Despicable Me 2. Grown Ups 2 3. Pacific Rim 4. The Heat 5. The Lone Ranger

SHANKWEILER’S DRIVE-IN 4540 SHANKWEILER RD (OFF Rt 309) OREFIELD 610-683-8775 http://www.shankweilers.com/

READING MOVIES 11 & IMAX 3D 30 N. SECOND ST READING MOVIES 11 & IMAX 3D 610-374-2828

THE GAP THEATER 47 BROADWAY St 610-863-3094 Courtesy of Twentieth Century Fox

THE ROXY 2004 MAIN ST NORTHAMPTON 610-262-7699 http://roxytheaternorthampton.com/

REGAL NORTHAMPTON 14 3720 EASTON-NAZARETH HIGHWAY (ROUTES 33 & 248) LOWER NAZARETH TOWNSHIP 610-559-7800

EMMAUS THEATER 19 S. FOURTH St 610-965-2878

TOP 10 BOX OFFICE MOVIES

REGAL POHATACONG CINEMA 12 Rt 22 PHILLIPSBURG, NJ 908-454-7500 http://www.fandango.com/

REGAL RICHLAND CROSSINGS 12 RICHLAND CROSSING QUAKERTOWN 215-536-7700 http://www.fandango.com


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

WHITE PARTY BY: Thienbao Nguyen

Like any lady about the town, a friend and I arrived Put on in part by the Downtown Bethlehem at the White Party last Friday night in Bethlehem’s Association and the Bethlehem Parking Authority, historic downtown area around 6:00 p.m. The the White Party was summer 2013’s annual shindig, party started at 5:30. By that time, the weather in aimed at raising funds for and awareness of the Bethlehem had already been raining for about 40 BPA’s work in increasing parking in downtown minutes, but the air was warm so there was no need Bethlehem. Ironically, as the party was held atop for any parkas or jackets to obscure our chosen the roof deck of the North Street Parking Garage, White Party attire. Despite the rain, Bethlehem’s the White Party temporary decreased parking in the fashionable partygoers showed up clad all in white, area by however many cars could have fit up there. with feather boas, seersucker suits and paint- Friday night though, those spaces were filled thick red lipstick channeling the night’s theme of in part by a live band that crooned the sounds Gatsby inspired decadence. I even spotted a few of 1920s style swing as well as slightly more feathery glittered headbands and as well as a top modern hits from the likes of Bobby Darin and hat and pocket watch (perhaps serious contenders Frank Sinatra. At first, most attendees were a bit for the night’s Best-Dressed awards?) My friend disappointed by the slate grayness of the weather and I were not quite so sartorially inclined or well and apprehensive about the rain, but as the night equipped as she forgot her umbrella so we had wore on the alcohol warmed up the people and the to share mine, but respite was soon found under atmosphere. Frivolity took hold and dancers let go one of several large tents that were set up around of inhibitions, umbrellas, and for some, even their the deck for people The White Party’s advertisements boasted three local shoes as dancers took to the to hang out shielded caterers. We found at least four as New Street’s Wrap’d Tight,floor. Girls grabbed their guys to let pearl necklace beads from the elements. a pretzel cart, a specialty popcorn cart, a hotdog cart, and a table serving beers wines and cocktails. clamor recklessly, ties swing Upon arrival the first thing I did was walk around freely and heels were kicked up. A poker table to get a feeling for the party, but being a greedy and faux grass lawn were set up with games for glutton of a person, really just to see what those less fearless about dancing in public and the food and drink was available. The White Party’s alcohol and chili-cheese flowed. My companion and advertisements boasted three local caterers. We I managed food from Wrap’d Tight as well as the found at least four as New Street’s Wrap’d Tight, a Pretzel cart, (which also had a pot of steaming pretzel cart, a specialty popcorn cart, a hotdog cart chili) while pretty girls nearby lapped up the (serving an impressive plethora of options) and a oniony grease that ran off the side of their hotdog table serving beers wines and cocktails. Notably papers. The rain was probably a more salient there was also a tent that sold cigars (not quite feature of the night than most would have liked food or drink, but still something of a down-the- and unfortunately decreased party attendance hole sort of substance). Rare is the event in which from the wished for 1200 but for those that did champagne flutes and chilidogs, so brazenly big brave the elements a certain American pluckiness, that they would make any one respectable enough a feeling of laissez-faire indulgence and a desire to sip blithely from a champagne flute blush, for a good time still made the White Party, a real coexist, but the White Party was one such event. pulled-from-Fitzgerald swingingest party in town.

Page 24

 5K Run ‐ New! Ages 13 & Up   Team Relay ‐ 5 people, 26.2 miles   25% of Finishers Qualied for Boston Marathon  Average �me of nishers was 4:02!

R������� B����� A�� 1 � S��� U� �� $20! |  V��M�������.��� 

The official registra�on and nancial informa�on of Via Events, Inc. may be obtained from the Pennsylvania Department of State by calling toll free, within Pennsylvania, 1 (800) 732‐0999. Registra�on does not imply endorsement.


• SCALPING • LARGEST SELECTION OF BODY JEWELRY IN THE VALLEY

• IMPLANTS • SURFACE PIERCING • CAUTERY BRANDING

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

“WE ARE THE LEHIGH VALLEY’S ONLY PIERCING AND BODY MODIFICATION STUDIO”

GIFT CERTIFICATES AVAILABLE

HERE’S THE DEAL: EVERY 5th PIERCING IS FREE

NOW OPEN SUNDAYS

THE LEHIGH VALLEY’S TATTOO PROFESSIONALS FOR OVER 20 YEARS

Photography courtesy of Rachel Marie Layden

PAGE 25

$200 ALL YOU CAN SIT TATTOOS


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

ZODIAC ARIES This week’s scenario is highlighted by your ability to use you natural charm and ambition to reach your goals. Your strong nature will attract people who admire your character and your drive. Try to divide your time between work and play, otherwise you may have to make up for lost time. You may feel your relationship is in need of a real boost. A sprinkle of romance could spice it up more than you ever thought possible. There’s something or someone that you can’t wait to get in touch with. The only thing that’s standing in your way, is your hesitance to use your charm. Turn on the personality and reach for the stars. With a little extra work on your part, you’ll shine. TAURUS This week’s scenario is highlighted by your need to excel in everything you do. Your charisma and charm will be working overtime. You don’t need to make a big splash to be noticed. You’ll attract the attention of someone you really admire. Be ready to listen to their problems or dilemnas. A little discretion and timing on your part will help you to win their favour. You’ll have new insights, where your love life is concerned. Old obligations should take priority over exciting new projects on your mind. Show your gratitude for other’s patience. You’ll be in a position to get what you want, though it may take some time.

LIBRA This week’s scenario is highlighted by your ability to get past indecisions and worries. Many people have put the pressure on you. Break free from the negative stress you feel. Confidence will help you get past your crankiness. You need to look at your situation more realistically. You may need to make that difficult phone call that you should have made a while back. Start to feel better by getting yourself to laugh at yourself. By weeks end the air will be buzzing with romance. Body language will be your best mode of communication. The rest will take care of itself. SCORPIO This week’s scenario is highlighted by your ability to keep everybody happy. You may even win an award for your leadership. People who have been such a big help deserve a big reward from you, as well. Keep those connections open with gifts of food, music and your time. Invite over a few friends to celebrate your good news. Someone may turn you down, but don’t despair, it may only mean that they have other things on their schedule, not on their mind. Someone from your past wants your attention, but this person may not be all that he appears to be. Be careful who you trust with important information.

Page 26

SAGITTARIUS This week’s scenario is highlighted by your ability to be your sexy, sensual self. A positive attitude will really come in handy, GEMINI This week’s scenario is highlighted by your ability to work around this week. You’re about to become the light in someone’s everybody else’s schedule. You may find yourself in the company eye. Do the exact opposite of your tired old routine. Change is healthy and therefore necessary for you. Your feelings are of someone who doesn’t share your values or ideas. The attraction is there, however the basics needed for a good relationship just as important as your thoughts. Spend time with people are not. Take a closer look at what you really want and what you who really understand and love you. Work on receiving, rather need to obtain it. This will require imagination, vision and some- than giving. All you really need do, is get in touch with the one who is in tune with themselves. If you change the approach, innermost you. Check all contracts and documents are in order before you sign them. What seems easy in theory may be a you’ll change the whole dynamic of your current situation. little more involved than you thought. Consult a professional if you’re not sure. CANCER This week’s scenario is highlighted by your need to reconnect CAPRICORN with the people who are precious to you. We all get busy, but This week’s scenario is highlighted by changes in the workplace nows the time to write those cards & make those phone calls as well as at home. Your nontraditional approach to life will you’ve been putting off. The whole exercise will lift your spirits surface from your passions. Listen to your heart and don’t be and give you some extra energy. A forgotten debt will become afraid to express your feelings. Your words may very well put due. Don’t panic, a difference in perspective could cause you to a spell on someone you already admire. There could be some re-act defensively. Look closer to see other’s motives. Facing fireworks. You’ll be waltzing around as though you’re in a cloud. your abligations and looking positively towards the future will You really should take a chance on love. A romantic adventure help you through this uncomfortable time. If you play without is possible if you’re willing to take a little risk. Things may not taking care of all the little tasks involved, you could end up with a have worked out exactly as planned, but the end result will be a disaster on your hands. Romance could be especially jeopardized good surprise for everyone. Go for it! by your lack of attention. AQUARIUS This week’s scenario is highlighted by your ability to believe LEO This week’s scenario is highlighted by being in the right place at in yourself. You don’t have to analyze someone’s motives, just accept their good will and meet them half way. If you’re feeling the right time when a possibility for romance peaks around the corner. A chance for a new relationship could emerge from a very a bit bitter when it comes to a lover or a would-be lover, you really need to get over it. Connections become more intimate unlikely source. Be aware of your surroundings, and be open to when you hold back on harsh judgments. Yes, they were moody what comes. Trust your instincts in matters of the heart. This is one time when you might have to question whether appearances and disagreeable but you continued to press all the wrong are that important. Your attention to detail could unearth errors buttons. You know the rules of the game as well as anybody in a crucial project. You may be tempted to lay the blame where it else and you agreed to them long ago. The playing field is more level than you realize. Success is inevitable if yourself keep rightly belongs, on others. For the sake of the team effort, howfocused on your goals. ever, hold your comments for now and concentrate on correcting the errors. Your cooperative attitude will be noticed, as will your PISCES analytical skills. This week’s scenario is highlighted by your leadership skills

VIRGO This week’s scenario is highlighted by your patience and openness towards others. Time now to amuse yourself, as well . Even the most casual flirtation happens for a reason. You deserve an extra special treat for all the effort you’ve invested in your relationship. It will be simple to treat yourself and someone else, simultaneously. Plan some quiet evenings for two in the comfort of home. Your lover will be surprised by your playfulness. Social gatherings should be marked on your calendar. Invite others to enjoy good food and conversation at your place. Say yes to invitations given by others, as well.

to bring a stalled project to a done deal. Bask in your share of the group’s recognition when it comes and humbly accept your role in the success. Your efforts will not go unnoticed and someone could make you an offer in the near future because of your actions now. Celebrate with loved ones. Other’s energies support your efforts at making changes, especially those that will help you to let go of an unhealthy habit. You have the inner resources to go it alone if necessary, but someone close to you could benefit from your example and encouragement. The buddy system could strengthen your own resolve to conquer this habit and give your ideas about replacement activities. Take it one day at a time.

CLUBS AND PUBS continued HELLERTOWN

Beer Mussels 1214 Main St 610-838-8200 Friday: Leechboy Saturday: Texas Hold’em Sunday: Texas Hold’em

PALMER Charles Chrin Community Ctr 4100 Green Pond Rd

CENTER VALLEY Melt Level 3 2805 Center Valley Parkway 610-798-9000 Fridays DJ Chubby C Saturday DJ Fog (Dan Glatts)

QUAKERTOWN

Big Daddy’s Wagon Wheel Tavern Route 313 & Sternersmill Rd. 215-536-9989 Wednesdays: Scott & Wade

WIND GAP Score Card Sports Bar 130 N. Broadway 610-863-5269 Thursdays : Funtime Karaoke 9:30pm - 1:30am TC Dance Club 6623 Sullivan Trail 610-881-1000 7/13 Social Ballroom/Latin Swing Dance

READING Rumorz 220 N. Park Rd 610-374-3200

KUHNSVILLE Kuhnsville Inn 5745 Memorial Rd 610-395-2387 Wed & Fri: Karaoke

WESCOSVILLE

Krocks Pub 1160 S. Krocks Rd 610-391-0648 Sat: DJ Linx

NORTHAMPTON

The Gin Mill / Main St Music Hall 1750 Main Street 610-262-5486 Wednesday: Karaoke Thursday: Karaoke Hammerhead Lounge 326 Main Street 610-262-6713 Tuesdays: Open Mic w/ Tim Harakal Thursdays: DJ B-Rad Fridays: DJ Statik 7/20 Tim Harakal 7/27 Mike & Dan Acoustic

MACUNGIE

The Pub On Main 102 E. Main St 610-966-2275 Thursdays: Comedy Night The Longswamp Tavern 20 Gap Road 610-702-3700 7/20 The Four Walls 7/27 Gail Force 8/3 Burnt Orange Trio

OREFIELD

DOYLESTOWN

Puck 1 Printers Alley 215-348-9000 7/18 M’Fanga 7/19 Four The Day 7/20 Tresspass 7/21 Bonner

Chambers 19 / The Other Side 19 N. Main Ave 215-348-1940 7/18 Dj Scriggs 7/19 Hank Brown / The Spinz 7/20 The Overtones / Scriggs The Farmhouse Tavern 380 N. Main St 215-345-9373 7/20 Keith Garner

PENNSBURG

PC Pub Restaurant & Sports Bar 500 Pottstown Ave 215-679-4900 Thur/Fri/Sat: DJ The Perk 501 E. Walnut St. 215-257-8483 Wednesdays: Open Mic Thursdays: Trivia Night Saturday: Karaoke

GOULDSBORO

Leather Corner Post 6855 Horeshoe Road 610-395-1782 Tuesday: Trivia w/ DJ Slacker Wednesday: Acoustic Jam Thursday: Open Jam 7/19 Jonas 7/20 Droppin’ Trou

The Grandview Gentlemens Club Rt 435 570-842-2661 Tuesday: College/Miltary Night 8/7 Amateur Night

CLINTON, NJ

Sarah Street Grill 550 Quaker Alley 570-424-9120 Wednesday: Open Mic 7/18 Price is Rice 7/19 The Pocono Duo 7/20 Old Man Brown Band 7/21 The Pocono Duo

Revolution 111 W. Main Street Clinton NJ Inside Holiday Inn

STROUDSBURG

For entertainment listings email us: thevalleybeat@gmail.com

Check out Tim Harakal Saturday at the Hammerhead Lounge in Northampton


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

PAGE 27


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

\\ Haircuts \\ Colors \\ Nails \\ Facial

Waxing

$10

Haircuts

New Clients Only

128 WEST 4TH ST. BETHLEHEM|610-849-2011|ALISTSALONSPA.COM

THE VALLEY BEAT INDUSTRY MONDAYS

Page 28

WITH

AT SOTTO SANTI 10 W. 4th St BETHLEHEM


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

PAGE 29


Page 30

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

PAGE 31


Page 32

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013


MUSIC

Drummer Wanted We are looking for drums to complete a 4 piece rock act. We have a variety of influences . Mike: 610-984-3791

GUITAR LESSONS from touring pro, performing and teaching for over 30 years and has shared the stage with BB King, Les Paul and Robert Cray. 610-360-5462 Trumpet / Bugler Needed To perform 140 Military funerals per year. Primarily between Reading and Allentown. 609-504-9450 Keyboard Player Wanted: play “Classic Hits” from the 60’s 70’s 80’s 90’s. Call Mike: 610-216-5501

EMPLOYMENT A Reliable Cleaning Person needed Monday thru Friday P/T for several locations in Allentown. Evenings after 5PM. Own Transportation a must. No Criminal record. We do check. Call 610-837-8999

Email // classifieds@thevalleybeat.com

Call // 9am - 5pm 7 Days a Week(484) 635-2253

EMPLOYMENT

EMPLOYMENT

REAL ESTATE

AUTOMOTIVE

Reliable Lot Person Needed to keep cars and lot clean. This is a full time position that requires some Saturdays. You must have a PA Drivers License and you must have your own transportation to get to work. If you are afraid of hard work please don’t apply if you are ready to work, please call Mr. C at 484-707-1516.

Delivery Drivers Wanted The Valley Beat is seeking Drivers for many areas in the Lehigh Valley. Must have own car / ins. Reply to: distribution@thevalleybeat.com

Spacious apartment, just renovated Six rooms, apartment, new kitchen, New decor, all utilities paid, near transportation. $700/month 610-266-7300

2000 CHEVROLET MONTE CARLO 3.8L 6CYL, AUTOMATIC TRANSMISSION, 133,000 MILES ,TWO TONED LEATHER, RUNS GREAT ! MOONROOF, AC/CD POWER WINDOWS, POWER LOCKS,$5,600.00 / 267-251-4997 (Montgomery County)

Coopersburg- Rooms For Rent Weekly or Monthly. Cable Utilities and wifi included. Single & Double Occupancy. $80/week and up. Clean Private. 610-282-8010

1995 white Acura Integra, 119,000 miles, runs great, automatic, all power, sunroof, heat, and dc sports exhaust sway bars. $2,300 obo also looking for a trade bigger car / 484-6950775

2br - House for Rent! (Salisbury)One, 2-bedroom house for lease! (Rental rate is $900 per month) Private, off-street parking for tenants. Property is located in a scenic BARTENDER Roosevelt’s 21st is looking to wood area, but close to lot of amenitites! Close to I-78, just off hire experienced bartenders. of Emmaus Ave. $900/month 1328 West Tilghman St, For more info call: 610-972-7121 Allentown, PA 21 East Elizabeth Ave, Bethlehem, PA Send resume or apply in person at either location.

2001 Chevy Blazer 130k miles, automatic - runs and drives great, 4 new tires, new CD player, great motor and trans. $1995 / 484-788-9945

APPLY TODAY START TOMORROW!!! Leading Distribution Company is seeking experienced Sit down forklift operators. • Selecting / Order Picking Hotel Housekeeping • must be able to lift 50lbs. (Comfort Inn Quakertown) now accepting applications for • Pre-Employment Check / Drug the position of Room Attendant. • Screening Required is. Weekends are mandatory. No 941 Marcon Blvd Suite 101 Allentown, Pa 18018 calls please. Reply with resume 610-264-1200 or employment applications are available and being accepted at RESTAURANT hotel front desk 24 hours a day. Massage Therapist Seeking Massage Therapists Experience Preferred Call 610-262-9580

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

//CLASSIFIEDS

The Valley Beat

Cash Paid For Your Vehicle We Buy Unwanted Vehicles Cash Paid. Must Run 484 788 9019

TO PLACE AN AD IN OUR NEW CLASSIFIED SECTION CONTACT US TODAY...

PAGE 33

FREE CLASSIFIEDS FOR A LIMITED TIME. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF A FREE OPPORTUNITY!


Page 34

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013


Massage

Now Hiring

UPSCALE LOCATION Open Daily 11am - 9pm

4539 Hamilton Blvd. Rt 222 Allentown, PA

610-530-9000 GRAND OPENING ASIAN BODY MASSAGE • CUTE GIRLS • FREE TABLE SHOWER

LOCATED ACROSS FROM ADULT OUTLET

OPEN 7 DAYS 9:30am - 10pm

570-468-4939

Welcome to the

BODY RUB

CLUB

60 MINUTE SESSION FOR $50

Lehigh Valley

Open 7 DAYS 10am - 10pm

Private & Discreet

offer valid with coupon

Pocono Locations

expires 7/31/2013

610-437-9505 LEHIGH VALLEY AIRPORT 2MI

0.1mi from 0.3mi from Union Blvd Hanover Ave GRAHAM

Aavalon is located on the corner of Graham & 724 E. Cedar St

aavalon

E.CEDAR ST

wawa

AIRPORT RD SOUTH

Massage by

484-201-0931 484-201-0931

Hi I’m Julie!!!!! Call Me Today!

484-554-3047

Call Me Today! AVAILABLE WED - s

No Texts or Blocked Calls

484-294-6900 845-204-8136

ARIES SPA 3333 HAMILTON BLVD

610.820.0210

BARBIE

MATT 610-297-2194

•Certified Massage Therapist (Shiatsu, Swedish, Finger Pressure) •Foot Massage •Facial & Skin Care for Men Open 7 Days

$50

with coupon

2 MILES FROM AIRPORT

413 Union Blvd Allentown, PA 18109

610.841.7900

•SAUNA •BODY SHAMPOO •HOT TOWEL HOURS 9am - 11pm OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK

10% OFF

WITH COUPON

PAGE 35

25min from Bethlehem

#52. RT 611 BARTONSVILLE, PA

570-421-8900

52 RT 611 NORTH • BARTONSVILLE, PA •18321

724 E. CEDAR ST • ALLENTOWN, PA 18109 SELECTIVELY HIRING!

BIG WOODY’S

TABLESHOWER & SAUNA AVAILABLE

Aavalon

RIGHT NEXT TO THE PLAYTIME BOUTIQUE

HANOVER AVE

WITH THIS AD - COUPON EXPIRES 7/31/2013

484-772-0911

U N I O N B LV D

$10 Off Your Session

NO BLOCKED OR TEXT’S PLEASE

hess express cvs

Tropic Health Spa Escape, Relax

$10 OFF WITH THIS AD 7 DAYS 10am-11pm• NOW HIRING

dunkin 0.1mi on donuts Union Blvd

We Are Located At 1410 Main St. Northampton, PA 610-262-9580

HOURS 11am - 9pm

CALL FOR SPECIALS

MASSAGE BY

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

H.C.

AMAZING AMANDA

ALL AMERICAN BODY & MIND


Last Day on the Job It was the mailman’s last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope. At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures. At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced. When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup’s bottom edge. “All this was just too wonderful for words,” he said, “but what’s the dollar for?” “Well,” she said, “last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you.” He said, “Fuck him, give him a dollar.” The lady then said, “The breakfast was my idea.”

Poor guy A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed. He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he’s in there, the husband tells his wife: “Listen, this guy’s an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn’t seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck.” If he wants sex, don’t resist, don’t complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he’ll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you.” To which his wife responds: “He wasn’t kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!” The Diaper One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to run some errands. The proud papa stayed home to watch his wonderful new son. Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry. The father did everything he could think of doing, but the baby wouldn’t stop crying. Finally, the dad got so worried that he decided to take the infant to the doctor. After the doctor listened to the father relate all that he had done to get the baby to stop crying, the doctor began to examine the baby’s ears, chest and then down to the diaper area.

Page 36

When he undid the diaper, he found that the diaper was indeed full. “Here’s the problem”, the Dr. said, “He needs to be changed!” The father was very perplexed, “But the diaper package says it is good for up to 10 lbs.!”

VIEW THE VALLEY BEAT ONLINE GO TO THE VALLEY BEAT.COM

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

JOKES


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

PAGE 37


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013 Page 38

AVAILABLE WHEREVER BEER IS SOLD!

Please Drink Responsibly

AllentownBeverage.com


SEE MORE PHOTOS ONLINE WWW.THEVALLEYBEAT.COM

ARIEL FULMER

PHOTOS BY: CHIP BULGIN • BILL MASON • JMP PHOTOGRAPHY • ROBERT SLEEPER PEDRO HESHIKE • BROGAARD PHOTOGRAPHY • MICHAEL GAFFNEY

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 17, 2013

MODEL BEAT

Age: 22 Harrisburg, PA

What do you do to make $$? Modeling Full Time. Are you? Single, dating, engaged, or married? Dating. How would our readers get to know you or become your friend? Contact My Agent: Randy@DonatelliModels.Com. 610-921-5582-- Ask for Randy! Where was your best vacation destination? Cancun Aruba. What do you do to relax? Spend Time with Friends. What sports do you watch the most? Football (Steelers). What is your favorite alcoholic beverage? Coconut Rum. What happens to be your worst vice? Men. What is your best feature? My Eyes. What TV show do you never miss each week? NCIS. What movie would you recommend to our readers? Stepbrothers. What is at the top of your “Bucket List?” Skydiving. Name 3 People important in your life? Dad, Sister and Boyfriend. What have you done in the last year that you would think is news to our readers? Furthering my modeling career and supporting Our Troops with pictures of us modeling on playing cards. What do you sleep in? Tank tops and SpongeBob shorts. What is the worst pick-up line ever tried on you? Hey Mermaid can I be your flounder. What do you want guys to know about sex/ relationships that you wish they knew (but they don’t)!? Communication is key. PAGE 39

Would you like to be considered for Model of the Week? Contact randy@donatellimodels.com or mickey@donatellimodels.com


MUSIC GREAT ENTERTAINMENT... LIVE coming To iT’s cLosEr THan YoU THinK

ed KowAlczyK

Anti-SociAl comedy tour

Ft. Artie lAnGe, dAVe Attell, Amy ScHumer And HoSted By Jim norton

tHe ultimAte tHriller:

tony Bennett

VISION BAR

A micHAel JAcKSon triBute SHow

JULY 19

JULY 20

JULY 21

JULY 26

cHeecH & cHonG witH wAr

BAd compAny

imprActicAl JoKerS

GodSmAcK

JULY 28

JULY 29

JULY 31

All StAr BoXinG

JAy leno

25tH AnniVerSAry oF dAnziG witH doyle

JULY 19 mUsic bY

aUgUsT 7

JULY 20

aUgUsT 10

aUgUsT 11

aUgUsT 13

aUgUsT 15

grEaT Upcoming EvEnTs

XFe cAGe wArS 25 – AuGuSt 17 tHe wAnted – AuGuSt 24 GABriel iGleSiAS – AuGuSt 29 HAnSon Ft. pAul mcdonAld – SeptemBer 2 Stone temple pilotS witH cHeSter BenninGton – SeptemBer 4

tHe Queen eXtrAVAGAnzA – SeptemBer 13 ruSSell BrAnd – SeptemBer 14 SArAH BriGHtmAn – SeptemBer 22 Steely dAn – SeptemBer 27 JeFF FoXwortHy – SeptemBer 28

jOIN US BEfORE ANd AfTER ThE ShOw

KAtHy GriFFin – octoBer 4 celtic tHunder – octoBer 9 diAnA KrAll – octoBer 10 BoBBy Vinton – octoBer 19

BOX OffICE: 610.297.7400. contact the box office about our Luxury seating. sanDsEvEnTcEnTEr.com Join THE mUsic insiDEr For vaLUabLE prEsaLE inFormaTion /THEsbEc

@THEsbEc

visionbarpa.com


Issue 148 july 17, 2013