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COVER: HAPPY 4th OF JULY! 11 LOCAL BEAT

WWW.THEVALLEYBEAT.COM

GUIDE 5 NEWS OF THE WEIRD Weird, but true stories from here and around the globe

8 CONCERT BEAT

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

THIS WEEK

VOL.1 ISSUE 6 • OCTOBER - NOV ISSUE 146.27JULY 3 -2,9,2010 2013

Concert listings from many places

10 CLUB & PUBS

We are working on it but need your help please send info

BEAT 11 LOCAL Each week we comment on local or national talent.

12 HOT SHOTS

Maybe we snapped a pic of you, check it out!

TOPCrashSPINS & MOVIE REVIEW 15 Gina from The Bone’s Top 10 Radio Hits. & A movie review 16 Done ALBUM REVIEW by The Bone’s - Gina Crash while Scotty’s on Vacation!

24 NFL BONEHEADS

Tyler Drake examines at how some NFL players do the absolute dumbest shit

26 ZODIAC

Your astrology for the week

36 JOKES & COMICS

12 HOT SHOTS 39 MODEL BEAT 39

A few chuckles to get you through the week

MODEL BEAT Last, but certainly not least your model of the week

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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013


by Chuck Shepherd

LEAD STORY

LEAST COMPETENT GUN HANDLING

Giddyup! When a strain of equine herpes led to a temporary quarantine at

Former Camden, N.J., police Sgt. Jeffrey Frett pleaded guilty in May in a scheme

horse farms in central Utah, the sponsors of the Davis County Mounted Posse

to qualify for early retirement by arranging to be shot in the leg (to be attributed to

Junior Queen contest in May had a dilemma, but instead of canceling the

random street violence). The plan deteriorated, police said, when Frett’s wife (the

competition in which the cowgirls show their skills on horseback, they decided

designated shooter) missed his leg, merely ripping a hole in his uniform pants.

to conduct the show except with the girls “riding” stick “ponies” to get style points. Former queen Savanna Steed told KSL-TV the change would be good because it would better test riders’ knowledge of the routines instead of their relying on their horses to make the moves.

-Ryan Martin, 29, and Erica Clayburn, 20, were charged with reckless endangerment in Derry Township, Pa., in April after Martin was shot in the jaw. The couple were playing a game resembling “Marco Polo” with a loaded handgun, with an eyes-closed Clayburn firing when Martin shouted “Gun!” (Martin was supposed to duck out of the way before Clayburn pulled the trigger.)

THE CONTINUING CRISIS

CREME DE LA WEIRD

Mattel revealed that its best-selling fashion doll in the last year, for the

In May, based on five women’s complaints, Virginia Beach, Va., police ar-

age-6-and-up market, has been the teen werewolf “Monster High” model,

rested restaurateur Henry Fitzsimmons, 54, for abduction and sexual assault

Clawdeen Wolf, who comes with heavy makeup, a short skirt and high

for harshly beating them as punishment for violating the terms of the “schol-

boots, and who supposedly spends her time “waxing, plucking and shaving.” (Says Clawdeen, in promotional materials, “My hair is worthy of a

arship” he supposedly offered them. The women claim that Fitzsimmons is a devotee of the “Spencer Plan” of orderly discipline, in which contracting parties adhere to agreed-on roles but at a cost of being physically disciplined if

shampoo commercial, and that’s just what grows on my legs.”) Though

they fail. Fitzsimmons acknowledged his fascination with the Spencer Plan, but

Mattel claims the doll celebrates girls’ imperfections, a counselor told Fox

denied the assaults, pointing out that he had fired one of the women and that

News she was appalled that the company tells young girls they “need to

the other four were helping her retaliate.

sculpt, tweeze, wax and ... change their bodies” to attract men.

THE CLASSIC MIDDLE NAME

-Cyber Making-Out: Tokyo’s Kajimoto Laboratory has created a

Arrested recently and awaiting trial for murder: Anthony Wayne Smith (former Oak-

tongue-kissing machine to enable lovers to suck face over the Internet,

land Raiders football player), Los Angeles (March); Theron Wayne Johnson, Weston,

according to a May CNN report. At separate locations, the pair place spe-

Texas (May); Michael Wayne McGray, Vancouver, British Columbia (May); Darrell

cial straws in their mouths and mimic a deep kiss, which is recorded and

Wayne Morris, Price, Utah (May). Convicted of murder: Thilbert Wayne Hager, States-

transmitted to each other’s straws. Researcher Nobuhiro Takahashi sees

ville, N.C. (October).

profit in “celebrity” tongue-kissing applications, but said more work is

QUESTIONABLE JUDGEMENTS

needed to establish individual taste, breathing and tongue moistness. (An-

Principal Terry Eisenbarth apologized to parents and children at Washington Elemen-

other team of Japanese researchers, using a harness-type device, reported

tary School in Mount Vernon, Iowa, in May and promised to stop his ritual “wham-

making similar advances -- in Internet “hugging,” with sensors that mimic

mies,” in which he summons kids on their birthdays to his office, sings “Happy Birth-

lovers’ heartbeats and even their spine’s “tingling” and stomach’s “but-

day” to them, and ceremonially spanks the child’s backside with a cushioned hockey

terflies.”)

stick (with the number of whacks equaling the child’s age).

-The Columbus, Ohio, school board accepted principal Kimberly Jones’

REDNECK CHRONICLES

resignation in May following revelations by The Columbus Dispatch

(1) In a April incident near Orlando, a former Ku Klux Klan “Cyclops,”

that she, though earning $90,000 a year, swore on federal forms that she

George Hixon, 73, and his son, Troy, 45, and Troy’s girlfriend fought, re-

made just $25,000 -- so that her own two children would qualify for reduced-price school lunches.

sulting in Troy’s allegedly firing gunshots toward the woman’s feet and the subsequent arrests of the two men. According to Osceola County deputies, the altercation was precipitated by the girlfriend’s unhappiness that she got the “cheap beer” while the men kept the “good beer” (Budweiser) for themselves. (2) The County Commission in Jackson, Ga., delayed a vote in December on new cell-phone towers at the request of one official with questions about the county’s contract -- Commissioner Gator Hodges.

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(Are you ready for News of the Weird Pro Edition? Every Monday at http://NewsoftheWeird.blogspot.com and www.WeirdUniverse.net. Other handy addresses: WeirdNews at earthlink dot net, and P.O. Box 18737, Tampa FL 33679.) COPYRIGHT 2013 CHUCK SHEPHERD DISTRIBUTED BY UNIVERSAL UCLICK 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, Mo. 64106

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

NEWS OF THE WEIRD


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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

PAGE 7


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

CONCERT BEAT

CHAMELEON CLUB, Lancaster, PA TICKETS 717-393-7713 Street Light Manifesto, Jul 11 Black Stone Cherry, Jul 16 Toy Soldiers, Jul 26 Black Noise Glow A Party, Jul 27

TICKETS 212-307-7171

TICKETS 610-434-4600 Coolio, Jul 19 Ministry of Love Great White, Aug 13 Bullet Boys, Aug 15

MAUCH CHUNK OPERA HOUSE, Jim Thorpe, PA TICKETS 570-325-0249 Ben Taylor, Jul 6 New Riders in Purple, Jul 12 Kashmir, Jul 13

MOHEGAN SUN ARENA AT CASEY PLAZA, Wilkes Barre, PA TICKETS 570-920-7600

MOUNT AIRY CASINO RESORT, Mount Pocono TICKETS 877-682-4791 Thunder from Down Under, Jul 5-Aug 31 Kansas, Aug 11 Jeff Ross, Sep 14

Carly Rae Jepsen, Aug 2 One Republic, Aug 3 Skillet, Aug 4

Beyonce, Jul 25 Black Sabbath, Aug 10 Frampton’s Guitar Circus, Aug 5 George Thorogood Styx & Foreigner, Aug 7 KC & The Sunshine Band, Aug 8 Darius Rucker, Aug 9 Ke$ha, Aug 10 Avenged Sevenfold, Aug 11

SHERMAN THEATER, Stroudsburg, PA Page 8

TICKETS 570-420-280 Mac Miller, Jul 11 Dave Mason, Jul 18 Christian Porter, Jul 19 Stavenfest, Jul 20

IRVING PLAZA, New York, NY

HERSHEY PARK ARENA, Hershey Park, PA

TICKETS 877-686-5366

TICKETS 212-777-6800 Sly & Robbie, Jul 11 Psychadelic Furs, Aug 3 Parachute, Aug 13 Baroness, Aug 14

TICKETS 717-534-3911

One Direction, Jul 5, 2013 • Dave Matthews Band, Jul 13

TOYOTA PAVILLION Montage Mountain - Scranton, PA TICKETS (570) 961-9000

Kid Rock, Jul 6 Rock Star Energy Drink Mayhem Fest, Jul 13 TICKETS TICKETS610-898-7200 610-898-7200 Vans Warped Tour, Jul 16 Ryan 10 • Sevendust, AliceCabrera Cooper/Jul Marilyn Manson, Jul Jun2518• SickPuppies, Aug 18 Lil’ Wayne, Jul 21 Uproar Tour: Alice In Chains / Janes Addicition, Aug 9

MAIN GATE, Allentown SOVEREIGN CENTER,PAReading, PA

TICKETS (215) 627-1332 RX Bandits, Jul 19 Bens Summer Bender, Aug 3 This is Hard Core, Aug 8-11 Fall Out Boy, Sep 8 City and Colour, Sep 18

TROCADERO, Philadelphia, PA TICKETS (215) 922-5483 Belle & Sebastian, Jul 10 A Flock of Seagulls, Jul 14 They Live, Jul 21 Summer Slaughter Tour, Aug 4 Scott Weiland, Aug 17 Kamelot, Sep 5

1409 N. 9th St

TICKETS 215-336-3600

TICKETS 610-332-1300

Jay Leno, Aug 11 Danzig with Doyle, Aug 13 Abba, Aug 15 The Wanted, Aug 24 Gabriel Iglesias, Aug 29 Hanson, Sep 2 Russell Brand, Sep 14 Sarah Brightman, Sep 22 Steely Dan, Sep 27 Jeff Foxworthy, Sep 28 Kathy Griffin, Oct 4 Celtic Thunder, Oct 9

REVERB - Reading, PA

WELLS FARGO CENTER Philadelphia, PA MUSIKFEST / CAFE Bethlehem, PA

TICKETS 800-745-3000

Heart & Jason Bonham, Jul 3 Kid Rock, Jul 9 Vans Warped Tour, Jul 12 Lynyrd Skynyrd & Bad Company, Jul 17

SUSQUEHANNA BANK CENTER Camden, NJ

THE ELECTRIC FACTORY, Philadelphia, PA

WWE Live, Jul 7

SANDS EVENT CENTER Bethlehem, PA Dwight Yoakam, Jul 3 Michael McDonald, Jul 7 Los Lobos, Jul 10 Slash, Jul 16 Ed Kowalczyk (Of Live), Jul 19 Tony Bennett, Jul 26 Anti-Social Comedy Tour, Jul 20 Bad Company, Jul 29 Seth Meyers, Jul 31 Family Feud Live, Aug 2 - 4 (PP’d) Godsmack, Aug 7

Rod Stewart, Dec 9

CROCODILE ROCK, Allentown, PA

The Eagles, Jul 16 Justin Bieber, Jul 17

MADISON SQUARE GARDEN New York, NY

Electric Hot Tuna, Jul 25 Kansas, Aug 11 We The Kings, Aug 14 Stroudfest, Aug 31

(610) 743-3069 Shooter Jennings, Jul 7 Revocation, Jul 14 Nine Days, Jul 26 Kix, Aug 17 Bam Margera w/ Hed Pe, Aug 23

KESWICK THEATRE, Glenside, PA TICKETS 215-572-7650 Buddy Guy, Jul 30 Philadelphia Rock & Blues Fest, Aug 14 Adam Ant, Aug 15 Gad Elmaleh, Sep 12

PENNS PEAK, Jim Thorpe, PA TICKETS 570-325-0371

Doobie Brothers, Jul 7 7 Bridges, Jul 12 Philadelphia Rock & Blues Fest, Aug 14 Adam Ant, Aug 15

KID ROCK PERFORMS THIS SATURDAY AT THE TOYOTA PAVILLION IN SCRANTON


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

4 E. 4th St • BETHLEHEM, PA • 610-868-1313

www.mollysbethlehem.com

484-788-9042

Monday - Friday 4 - 6pm $6 Martini Happy Hour Trivia Thursdays 8 - 10pm $50 - 1st Place $25 - 2nd Place PAGE 9


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

CLUBS AND PUBS ALLENTOWN

Jabber Jaws Bar & Grille 1327 Chew St Allentown, PA 610-432-6524 Tilted Kilt 2835 Lehigh St 610-791-2100 Grumpy’s BBQ Roadhouse 3000 Mauch Chunk Rd 610-769-4600 7/5 Jake Kaligis 7/6 Hillbilly Souls Rascals Pub & Afterdark Lounge 6616 Ruppsville Rd 610-366-1130 Pitchers Sports Bar & Grill 570 Union Boulevard 610-841-4001 Friday: Live Entertainment

BATH Cornerstone Pub 506 Penn St 610-837-6670 7/12 DJ Cobra 7/27 Scott Marshall

BETHLEHEM Bar With No Name 300 Gateway Drive 610-866-5800 Fridays: DJ Cap Cee Saturdays: DJ Trama MacGrady’s 117 E. Third St 610-868-8925 Wednesday: Trivia Thursday: DJ@10pm Sat: Acoustic Entertainment

Funhouse 5 E. Fourth Street 610-868-5311 7/3 Urban Achievers Stratus Night Club 7/4 DJ Discreet 1193 Airport Road 7/5 Waiting For Rain 610-776-2090 7/6 Small Change Wednesday: Karaoke 7/7 Modern Romance 7/8 Adam Marsland Strange Brew 7/9 Asa-Em Tavern 1996 S. Fifth St Diamondz 610-841-3610 Monday: Pong night 1913 W Broad St Bethlehem, Pa 18018 Sunday: Open mic 610 865 1028 7/5 Scott Marshall Monday: Jukebox 7/6 Hattrick Thursday: Karaoke Fri & Sat: Dance club/ Roosevelt’s 21st 1328 W. Tilghman St Karaoke Sunday: Karaoke (610) 770-1444 Mon - Fri 1/2 price apps Live Music 4-7 Bethlehem Brew Live Entertainment Works Tim Harakal / Billy 569 Main St Patrick / Strange 610-882-1300 Coincidence & More Vision Bar @ Sands Jetport Lounge Event Center 3400 Airport Rd. 77 Sands Boulevard Allentown, Pa 610-297-7410 610-266-1000 Wednesdays: 6-12am 7/5 Digital Getdown 7/6 Sparkling Summer DJ Jimmy K Night Fridays: Mike Mitman Tally Ho 205 W. Fourth St 610-865-2591

Sands Bethlehem Molten Lounge 511 E. 3rd Street 484-777-7777 7/3 DJ Johnny B 7/4 Back2Life Band 7/5 ReMIXTD 7/6 Gas Station Disco 7/7 Crazy Hearts 7/8 Gas Station Disco 7/9 Joey Casella

ReMIXTD 7/5 Molten Lounge Sands Bethlehem Bethlehem, PA

Roosevelt’s 21st 25 E. Elizabeth Ave (610) 266-1950 Thursdays - DJ Jamal Knight

Godfrey Daniels 7 E. Fourth St 610-867-2390 7/3 July Irish Seisiun 7/5 First Friday Series 7/7 Open Mike

Digital GetDown 7/5 Vision Bar Sands Event Center Bethlehem, PA

CATASAQUA

Blue Monkey Sports Restaurant 1092 Howertown Rd 610-266-1550

COOPERSBURG

Heritage Day & DJ Competition 7/6 Drinky’s Easton, PA

Silhouettes Showbar & Gentlemen’s Club 111 E. Station Ave (Right off 309) 610-282-8010 Thu Pool Tourney 8pm

BARTONSVILLE

The Pocono Pub Rt. 611, Bartonsville 570-421-5743 Monday: Open Mic Tues, Thurs, Sun: Karaoke 7/3 Dale Barth of Who knows

EASTON

Spanky’s East 1700 Butler St 610-559-5170 Tues: Texas Hold Em’ Drinky’s 3 Centre St Sq 610-252-3800 7/6 DJ Competition Porter’s Pub 700 Northampton St. 610-250-6561 7/3 Irish Jam 7/5 Blue Jean Easton’s Own 7/6 Quimby Mountain Band

Quimby Mountain 7/6 Porters Pub Bartonsville, PA

MORE ON PAGE 26

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Main Gate 17 W. Liberty Street 610-776-7711 Friday Night: Noche Latina Saturday: Classique 80’s, 90’s music 7/10 Ryan Cabrera

The Brewworks Restaurant & Brewery 812-816 W Hamilton St 610-433-7777 Tuesday: Comedy Wednesday: Trivia Thursday: Karaoke Friday: Office Party Saturday: Guided Tours


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

HOTSHOTS! HOTSHOTS!

If you are a bar or club that would like to featured in Hot Shots send us an email: thevalleybeat@gmail.com

THE HOTSHOTS TEAM MET UP WITH THE COORS LIGHT GIRLS FOR THEIR PUB CRAWL AT VARIOUS LOCATIONS

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SPECIAL THANKS TO: SHOWGUN PHOTOGRAPHY & WILLIAM WOOLER PHOTOGRAPHY


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

24 Taps

www.strangebrewtavern.co 610-841-3610

Featuring a wide array of domestic, import, micro & craft Brews Entertainment This Week: Friday July 5 – Scott Marshall Saturday July 6 – Hattrick

WAT CH A L THE GAM L HER ES E

Kitchen open 11am til Midnight

Open 7 days a week 11am - 2am

strangebrew610

1996 S. Fifth St Allentown

(corner of S. 5th St & Emaus Ave)

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Sunday, July 14, 6-8pm McDonald’s Route 100 in Macungie


BROUGHT TO YOU BY

1

2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

TRENCHES

POP EVIL ONYX

STONE

ALICE IN CHAINS

THE DEVIL PUT DINOSAURS HERE

THE HANGMAN’S BODY COUNT VOLBEAT OUTLAW GENTLEMEN & SHADY LADIES

PLOT: When a paramilitary group takes over the White House, a U.S Capitol cop, John Cale (Channing Tatum) - who flunked his interview to join the secret service- is the only one left to protect the president (Jamie Foxx), and prevent World War III. REVIEW: Hey wait, doesn’t this all seem a little familiar? Didn’t Gerard Butler just save the president from North Korea? Who’s screwing with the commander in chief now? OK, to be fair James Vanderbilt’s script for WHITE HOUSE DOWN was already making the rounds before OLYMPUS HAS FALLEN ever got close to production (read my review of that film HERE), so it’s not really a case of one movie ripping off the other. While that film took a hardcore, R-rated (almost retro) action approach, WHITE HOUSE DOWN is a tent-pole PG-13 movie that’s clearly aiming for the widest possible audience.

I’LL FOLLOW YOU

SHINEDOWN AMARYLIS

LIFT ME UP W/ ROB HALFORD FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH THE WRONG SIDE OF HEAVEN &

THE RIGHTEOUS SIDE OF HELL, VOL 1

DO ME A FAVOR

STONE SOUR

HOUSE OF GOLD AND BONES PT. 2

SWERVE CITY

DEFTONES

KOI NO YOKAN

OUT OF TIME W/ CHESTER BENNINGTON

STONE TEMPLE PILOTS

HOWL

BEWARE OF DARKNESS ORTHODOX

CAME BACK HAUNTED NINE INCH NAILS

HESITATION MARKS

If WHITE HOUSE DOWN is patterned on anything, it’s Emmerich’s own INDEPENDENCE DAY (which even gets named-checked), mixed with a heavy dose of DIE HARD. In fact, the DIE HARD influence is so strong that the baddies’ hacker, played by Jimmi Simpson, is clearly modeled on Clarence Gilyard’s Theo, to the point that he even listens to classical music (not ‘Ode to Joy’- that would be too obvious). Channing Tatum’s everyman hero also seems heavily patterned on John McClane. Like Willis in DIE HARD, he’s named John, and spends most of the movie in a dirty-undershirt. He’s a similar kind of working-class hero, with him almost being laughed out of his secret service interview for not having the right qualifications. Tatum at first trying to resist the call the action until being forced into action to save the president’s life. The baddies here are a rogues gallery of ultra-right wingers, with their ranks including white-power extremists, mercenaries, and disillusioned soldiers, bankrolled- as Foxx puts it- by the “military-industrial complex”. Conspiracy buffs will love this. The gang of no-goodnik’s is led by Jason Clarke, a former black ops soldier looking for a little payback. Ultimately he’s just the henchman of a big bad who’s revealed early in the film, although I won’t spoil who it is here- even though it’s painfully obvious. The rest of the cast is very solid, as is the usual in an Emmerich movie. Maggie Gyllenhaal plays the secret service agent who’s sidelined and has to talk Tatum through the White House on a walkie-talkie (the Reginald VelJohnson part- although she’s cuter), while Richard Jenkins is the Speaker of the house who finds himself the next-in-line to be president. James Woods makes a welcome return to the mainstream as the head of the secret service, complete with a Johnny Unitas style flat-top haircut that makes him look stern and menacing. Obviously WHITE HOUSE DOWN won’t be everyone’s idea of a good time, but I had a blast with it. At times, it comes dangerously close to either (A) being too stupid, or (B) being too much of a DIE HARD-clone, but in it’s 137 minutes, it comes just shy of overstaying it’s welcome. Like OLYMPUS HAS FALLEN, you need to check your brain at the door, but also like that film, it’s a lot of fun. I’d say it’s easily Emmerich’s best movie in at least a decade.

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10

By Chris Bumbray

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

Movie Review

GINA CRASH’S TOP 10


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013 Page 16

ALBUM REVIEW

By: Gina Crash By: Scotty Brilliant


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

\\ Haircuts \\ Colors \\ Nails \\ Facial

Waxing

$10

Haircuts

New Clients Only

128 WEST 4TH ST. BETHLEHEM|610-849-2011|ALISTSALONSPA.COM

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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013


DigiTal gETDown with DJ kiD aV

DJ Tim marTEll

in partnership with FLaVorpiLL anD sanDs Casino

Emily’s Toybox

SATURDAY, JULY 6

FRIDAY, JULY 12

m80

DJ Cap CEE

with DJ aaron B

with DJ miCke styLes

SATURDAY, JULY 13

for the summer

DJ Cova

Lehigh VaLLey instyLe sparkLing summer nights party

SATURDAY, JULY 5

Patio oPen

FRIDAY, JULY 19

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

Premier entertainment COMING TO vision Bar

SATURDAY, JULY 20

DJ aDriano

with DJ Freezie FRIDAY, JULY 26

SATURDAY, JULY 27

FRIdAyS At VISION BAR

SAtuRdAyS At VISION BAR

2.50 drafts until Midnight Relaxed dress code

10pm – 2am • $10 Cover Charge Dress to impress

Live Music every Friday 10pm – 2am $ 6 Cover Charge $

World Class DJs spinning the hottest dance music

Join us Before and after every show at the sands Bethlehem event Center! /VISIONBARPA

@VISIONBARPA PAGE 19

VISIONBARPA.COM


Page 20

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013


Restaurant review by Camille Capriglione

It is always exciting when merchants breathe new life into a historic building, while retaining its nobility and charm. That is exactly what brothers Joseph and Angelo Caiazzo have done with the former Bath Hotel, which was built in 1817. Applying everything they learned about the restaurant business from their father (AKA the ‘Red Wolf,’ a moniker which was a code term when their dad was approaching) the brothers created a contemporary and tasteful establishment.    The renovated two-story building of tan stucco and gray stone has a welcoming façade.  The large open porch looks out onto the heart of West Broad Street in Bath, PA.  The pub area is impressive, with a wood floor and unique concrete bar, in a room that is cozy and nicely lit. The dining room is adorned with colorful walls, recessed lighting and windows with live plants. This leads to a comfortable game room. There are flat screen TV’s, a pool table, jukebox and video games.

VALLEY BEAT JULY 2013 THETHE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 3, 2013

Red Wolf BaR & GRille I was impressed by the menu and tickled by the uniquely-named items. Sandwiches such as the ‘Fatty Cheese Steak’ and ‘Canis Rufus.’ The ‘Carnivore Salad,’ ‘Fried Dots’ and ‘Howling Fries’ (sautéed onions, banana peppers, jalapenos and two cheeses) tempted my palate. Available entrees include lasagna, penne vodka, stuffed flounder, rib eye steak, beer battered haddock and gnocchi.  They also offer wings, wraps, burgers and specialty pizzas. Their dough is made fresh each morning. 

Featured cocktails were a strawberry rhubarb cooler and a ginger julep. For an appetizer, I chose the ‘Shrimp Lejon’ (bacon-wrapped shrimp with dipping sauce.) It was succulent and cooked to perfection.   I ordered their big seller, the Drunken Chicken Parm sandwich. Served on a large, fresh sub roll was tender chicken breast in a light breading, topped with vodka pasta sauce, thinly sliced ham, chopped tomatoes, onions and melted cheese.  Being an Italian, I have a high culinary standard. Let me tell you, this sandwich is legit! It was delicious and authentic.    Desserts consist of various favorites, such as Chocolate lava cake and Apple crumb. Red Wolf Bar & Grille is family-friendly, with a kids menu and high chairs available. The staff is personable and attentive.  The general manager, Yuri, makes patrons feel right at home!  The Caiazzos believe in ‘Farm to Table’ and frequently use local farms’ produce, such as fruit and potatoes. Red Wolf Bar & Grille also participates in “Last Thursdays,” a monthly event hosted by local businesses.

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The restaurant is open 6 days a week for lunch and dinner. Carry out is available. A very reasonably priced menu ranges from $5-$15. There are several parking spaces in front of the building and there is on-street parking nearby, as well as a borough parking lot. Come visit the Red Wolf Bar & Grille for cocktails and a delicious meal! 


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

NOW

! E E R F SMOKE

43 CRAFT - DRAFTS ON TAP 25 CRAFT - WINGS 70 CRAFT - BURGERS EVERY SATURDAY - BUY ONE BURGER GET ONE FREE!

ICE - COLD PITCHERS - ALL DAY EVERYDAY

$7 $8

COORS LIGHT / LABATT / BLUE MOON SAM ADAMS & ANGRY ORCHARD

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NIGHTLY ENTERTAINMENT Wednesdays - Trivia Night Thursdays - DJ Thursday starting at 10PM Every Friday & Saturday - Live Acoustic Music


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

THIS WEEKEND THEATER LISTINGS AMC TILGHMAN 8 TILGHMAN SQUARE ALLENTOWN (610) 391-0772

FRANK BANKO ALEHOUSE CINEMAS STEELSTACKS ONE FOUNDERS WAY BETHLEHEM 610-297-7111

BECKY’S DRIVE IN Rt. 248 BERLINSVILLE http://www.beckysdi.com/

MAHONING VALLEY CINEMA CARBON PLAZA MALL LEHIGHTON 610-377-8626 http://mvcinema.com/

CARMIKE 16 1700 CATASAUQUA RD ALLENTOWN 610-264-9624 http://www.carmike.com/

MAHONING DRIVE-IN Rt 443 LEHIGHTON 570-645-6204

CARMIKE PROMENADE & IMAX 2805 CENTER VALLEY PARKWAY SAUCON VALLEY 610-709-8635 CIVIC’S THEATER 514 514 N. 19th St ALLENTOWN

READING MOVIES 11 & IMAX 3D 30 N. SECOND ST READING MOVIES 11 & IMAX 3D 610-374-2828

THE GAP THEATER 47 BROADWAY St 610-863-3094

TOP 10 BOX OFFICE MOVIES

6. This is the End 7. Now You See Me 8. Fast & Furious 6 9. Star Trek into the Darkness 10. The Internship

SHANKWEILER’S DRIVE-IN 4540 SHANKWEILER RD (OFF Rt 309) OREFIELD 610-683-8775 http://www.shankweilers.com/

July 12th, 2013

NEW DVD RELEASES

1. The House I Live In 2. Venus & Serena 3. Inescapable 4. 6 Souls 5. Falcon

Courtesy of Warner Bros Pictures

6. Last Resort: Season 1 7. Tai Chi Hero 8. The Employer 9. Tower Block 10. T.B.A

PAGE 23

1. Monsters University 2. The Heat 3. World War Z 4. White House Down 5. Man of Steel

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REGAL NORTHAMPTON 14 3720 EASTON-NAZARETH HIGHWAY (ROUTES 33 & 248) LOWER NAZARETH TOWNSHIP 610-559-7800

EMMAUS THEATER 19 S. FOURTH St 610-965-2878

Courtesy of Twentieth Century Fox

REGAL POHATACONG CINEMA 12 Rt 22 PHILLIPSBURG, NJ 908-454-7500 http://www.fandango.com/

REGAL RICHLAND CROSSINGS 12 RICHLAND CROSSING QUAKERTOWN 215-536-7700 http://www.fandango.com


THE VALLEY BEAT JUNE 26, 2013 Page 24

NFL IDIOCY BY: Tyler Drake

With National Football League players apparently gum prior to committing murder — and he comes murdering people willy-nilly, the Lehigh Valley off as a boneheaded criminal who returned a rental is perhaps lucky that the Philadelphia Eagles car with a shell casing from the shooting inside. switched their summer session elsewhere. Now The Patriots, Hernandez’s former team, released former New England Patriot Aaron Hernandez was him and voided the remainder of his contract prior charged this week with first-degree murder and to the presentation of formal charges. Additionally, additional firearms-related charges. The charges they took jerseys bearing his name or number out shocked even the incredibly lenient NFL fan base, of team stores and offered to replace them with which has previously forgiven talented players for other players’ jerseys. This immediate scarcity, almost every offense against humanity imaginable. coupled with some perverse societal glorification Considering the collective opinions of football fans of murder, launched prices for Aaron Hernandez from Dallas and Pittsburgh, an observer might jerseys sky high on eBay. Looking on the auction reasonably conclude that quarterback Tony Romo’s site right now, there are half a dozen autographed underperforming in the playoffs is somehow a jerseys that have been bid up above $500. Some worse trait than Ben Roethlisberger’s being a have 50 separate bids. Being a potential serial serial insulter of women protected by rental cops. killer, it seems, is good for jersey desirability. Pro football might be the most exciting to watch, but One group of fans that this news barely affected there has been a history of athletes being involved is the video game enthusiasts. For them, Aaron with driving while intoxicated, reckless driving while Hernandez merely changes from a useful target in sober, large quantities of marijuana, large quantities the last incarnation of the Madden football game of cocaine, heroin and ecstacy, large quantities series to a hero in the latest version of the Grand of illegal guns, violence against women, violence Theft Auto game series, which allows the player to against kids, violence against the police, violence steal cars, transport drugs, collect guns, run down against dogs, general “The charges shocked even the incredibly pedestrians, undertake driveviolence, prostitution, shootings and executions, lenient NFL fan base, which has previously by terrorizing a commercial and fight women —all staples aircraft, and firebombing. forgiven talented players for almost every of the NFL off-season lifestyle. Sebastian “Sea Bass” offense against humanity imaginable.” Of course not every NFL player Janikowski, sometimes called the Polish Cannon is a bad apple. Eugene Robinson, for instance, for his monster kicking leg, has been caught received the Bart Starr Award for exemplifying fighting people in bars, trying to bribe police character and outstanding moral leadership. officers, driving drunk, tampering with evidence, However, later that day, after receiving the award, and possessing roofies (the date-rape drug). He is Robinson offered an undercover police woman currently the highest-paid placekicker in NFL history, forty bucks for a blow job (and not the kind that booting balls for the Oakland Raiders, whose fans involves a delivery to Michael Irvin). Maybe the other enthusiastically root for an entire team of criminals. Bart Starr Award winners are the good apples. What could possibly motivate a man on $40-million, Perhaps the problem is this: the actions of these five-year contract for playing a game to jeopardize men that we admire are seen by many people, his money and freedom by committing murder? and the crimes they commit affect only a few. So Police are now working on a theory that he may had while millions can admire their on-field exploits, murdered Odin Lloyd, a semi-pro football player, far fewer people need to fear them. And when they because he had knowledge of a previous double are caught, they often seem to go free. Janikowski murder possibly committed by Hernandez in 2012. has repeatedly gotten probation, and there is a Yes, the number of murders committed by this tight general suspicion that O.J. “The Juice” Simpson end appears to be growing exponentially — next week may have gotten away with murder. So maybe it he could be accused of another four. Bizarre details is best that we keep the NFL players out of the abound — Hernandez allegedly seems to prefer Lehigh Valley — it is safest to watch them on TV. cotton-candy flavored Bubblicious brand chewing


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013 PAGE 25

Photography courtesy of Rachel Marie Layden


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

ZODIAC

ARIES (3/21 – 4/19) Home and your emotional center are of primary importance over the next few days. You’ll need to get sorted out in your surroundings and your heart before you can turn your energies outward again. And don’t delay -- you won’t want to miss the activity and adventure that await around Thursday and Friday! Get outside -- you don’t need a plan! And this weekend you might feel picky, but if you let it go a little, you’ll find a lot to love. TAURUS (4/20 – 5/20) If you wanna be a homebody, the next couple of days are perfect for that. Then seeing eye-to-eye with others could be tough around Thursday and Friday, whether at work or in your personal life. Concerted efforts toward listening -- and understanding -- are required. Then it’s your heart that’s sending off sparks when the weekend comes. Whether you’re part of a couple or looking for summertime romance, the way to heat things up is to say what’s on your mind!

GEMINI (5/21 – 6/21) The more people you meet, the more conversations you have, the more new stuff you find along the way to feed into the ol’ brain. Then you might be feeling a little less than generous or a little bit jealous over the next few days. It’s not the greatest look on you, so find the real issue and address it promptly! Then around Thursday, Friday and Saturday, lighten up and live life to the hilt -- it’s party time, if the stars have their say. But Sunday requires a little more thinking things through. CANCER (6/22 – 7/22) You can get your ideas (and innuendos, and invitations) across way better over the next few days, when you’re extra compelling -- and extra hot! Don’t be scared to leave your shell behind, shed an inhibition (or two) and go after what you want. But you’re a little impaired in the decision-making department around Thursday and Friday -- what seems like a fantastic idea now could make for problems later. Get some advice and reassess this weekend.

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LEO (7/23 - 8/22) Get input and get ready to make a more informed, more right-for-you move. And the cosmic energy facilitates this over the next few days, keeping you clear-headed and creative at the same time. Then your hottest days in a long time -- maybe all summer -- are Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Roar! Old favorites, brand-spanking-new fun -- anything goes now. And with you around, everything’s great! Don’t overlook the allure of a simple starlit evening! On Sunday, though, a practical matter needs your attention... VIRGO (8/23 - 9/22) Double-check that ‘To’ line before you hit ‘Send’ on Monday! Even you might be a little disorganized now -- avoid big flub-ups. Getting things back in order is easier over the next few days, and don’t neglect your social calendar now, either. Find the time for friends and do something new; it’ll all inspire you! At the end of the workweek, circumstances may be less than ideal in some area of life, but there’s another way. Entertain lots of options. And when the weekend comes, the stars are on your side, you fabulous thing! It’s time to get the most out of life -- and even love!

LIBRA (9/23 - 10/22) Things tend go off track over the next few days, but stressing isn’t gonna help matters. While you’re stuck waiting or wondering, you can still find fun. And when you do that, the other stuff seems to sort itself out! But you can (and should) take a more active role starting Thursday. Your life needs guidance now, and you’ll want to especially welcome and shape what’s new. If you want to just chill out, Sunday’s the day. SCORPIO (10/23 - 11/21) You’ll need those amazing analytical powers of yours take all the info into account, then sort it out. Over the next few days, though, get a little more touchy-feely -- whether figuratively or literally! Things aren’t so concrete now, and if you can set expectations aside and just explore, you’ll free up the energy flow. Then while your spark is hot, you might try fitting in when it comes to a certain situation instead of standing out around Thursday or Friday. Consider it going undercover! This weekend’s perfect for friends, projects and fun plans -- and you don’t have to think too big. SAGITTARIUS (11/22 - 12/21) Seeing things as they are -- instead of according to preconceptions or others’ projections -- keeps you plenty busy.This vision, though, gives you a real advantage with the questions coming up over the next few days. Get someone else in on looking for answers to make it more interesting, funnier and more fun. Then around Thursday, Friday and Saturday, make the most of what life has to give -- and that’s a lot right now! Don’t waste these beautiful days and hot nights. There’s plenty of time starting Sunday for tidying up and chilling out. CAPRICORN (12/22 - 1/19) A friend who really gets you can shed some light on a situation -- providing you explain it thoroughly. Then someone may be calling on you for some help around Thursday and Friday. You should absolutely engage empathetically and do what you can, but know when they’re asking too much, too. And your ideas for this weekend can turn out even better than you’d hoped. Get your favorite people on board, have fun and bond! AQUARIUS (1/20 - 2/18) Show your spark! Then health and home need taking care of over the next few days. You might be crazy-busy, but fit in exercise and keep your abode in order, too -- physical well-being and surroundings have lots of emotional and mental impact now. And starting Thursday and lasting through the weekend, relationships look very interesting. Figuring out where they’re coming from, where you’re at and how the two intersect -- or when they don’t -- might be a challenge, but it’s a super-rewarding one to undertake. PISCES (2/19 - 3/20) Good thing you’re so persuasive -- you can get help with the concrete stuff in exchange for your creative thinking or sheer entertainment value. With the right partner right now, there’s really nothing you can’t do! Follow your ideals until sometime Thursday, when, if you don’t get in touch with reality, it’s gonna give you a major wake-up call. Everything’s interconnected, and if you’ll only look from now through the weekend, the stars give you insight about how.

CLUBS AND PUBS continued HELLERTOWN

Beer Mussels 1214 Main St 610-838-8200 Friday: Leechboy Saturday: Texas Hold’em Sunday: Texas Hold’em

PALMER Charles Chrin Community Ctr 4100 Green Pond Rd

CENTER VALLEY Melt Level 3 2805 Center Valley Parkway 610-798-9000 Fridays DJ Chubby C Saturday DJ Fog (Dan Glatts)

QUAKERTOWN Big Daddy’s Wagon Wheel Tavern Route 313 & Sternersmill Rd. 215-536-9989 Wednesdays: Scott & Wade

WIND GAP Score Card Sports Bar 130 N. Broadway 610-863-5269 Thursdays : Funtime Karaoke 9:30pm - 1:30am TC Dance Club 6623 Sullivan Trail 610-881-1000 7/13 Social Ballroom/Latin Swing Dance

READING Rumorz 220 N. Park Rd 610-374-3200

KUHNSVILLE Kuhnsville Inn 5745 Memorial Rd 610-395-2387 Wed & Fri: Karaoke

WESCOSVILLE

Krocks Pub 1160 S. Krocks Rd 610-391-0648 Sat: DJ Linx

NORTHAMPTON The Gin Mill / Main St Music Hall 1750 Main Street 610-262-5486 Wednesday: Karaoke Thursday: Karaoke Hammerhead Lounge 326 Main Street 610-262-6713 Tuesdays: Open Mic w/ Tim Harakal Thursdays: DJ B-Rad Fridays: DJ Statik 7/13 Sweet Spot 7/20 Tim Harakal

MACUNGIE The Pub On Main 102 E. Main St 610-966-2275 Thursdays: Comedy Night The Longswamp Tavern 20 Gap Road 610-702-3700 7/13 Voodoo Blues 7/20 The Four Walls

OREFIELD Leather Corner Post 6855 Horeshoe Road 610-395-1782 Tuesday: Trivia w/ DJ Slacker Wednesday: Acoustic Jam Thursday: Open Jam 7/6 A.D.D

CLINTON, NJ Revolution 111 W. Main Street Clinton NJ Inside Holiday Inn

DOYLESTOWN

Puck 1 Printers Alley 215-348-9000 7/3 Somebody Else’s Minty Thang 7/4 Nation Xero 7/5 Levee Drivers 7/6 Ronstandt Generations Chambers 19 / The Other Side 19 N. Main Ave 215-348-1940 The Farmhouse Tavern 380 N. Main St 215-345-9373 6/28 Michael Kracht 6/29 Keith Garner

PENNSBURG PC Pub Restaurant & Sports Bar 500 Pottstown Ave 215-679-4900 Thur/Fri/Sat: DJ The Perk 501 E. Walnut St. 215-257-8483 Wednesdays: Open Mic Thursdays: Trivia Night Saturday: Karaoke

GOULDSBORO The Grandview Gentlemens Club Rt 435 570-842-2661 Tuesday: College/Miltary Night 7/3 Amateur Night

STROUDSBURG Sarah Street Grill 550 Quaker Alley 570-424-9120 Wednesday: Open Mic 7/6 Chelsea Carlson 7/7 The Pocono Duo / Kyle Baker 7/9 Regina Sayles

For entertainment listings email us: thevalleybeat@gmail.com

Check out A.D.D Band This Saturday at the Leather Corner Post in Orefield


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

PAGE 27


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013


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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013


MUSIC

Drummer Wanted We are looking for drums to complete a 4 piece rock act. We have a variety of influences . Mike: 610-984-3791 GUITAR LESSONS from touring pro, performing and teaching for over 30 years and has shared the stage with BB King, Les Paul and Robert Cray. 610-360-5462

Trumpet / Bugler Needed To perform 140 Military funerals per year. Primarily between Reading and Allentown. 609-504-9450 Keyboard Player Wanted: play “Classic Hits” from the 60’s 70’s 80’s 90’s. Call Mike: 610-216-5501

EMPLOYMENT A Reliable Cleaning Person needed Monday thru Friday P/T for several locations in Allentown. Evenings after 5PM. Own Transportation a must. No Criminal record. We do check. Call 610-837-8999

Email // classifieds@thevalleybeat.com

Call // 9am - 5pm 7 Days a Week(484) 635-2253

EMPLOYMENT

EMPLOYMENT

REAL ESTATE

AUTOMOTIVE

Reliable Lot Person Needed to keep cars and lot clean. This is a full time position that requires some Saturdays. You must have a PA Drivers License and you must have your own transportation to get to work. If you are afraid of hard work please don’t apply if you are ready to work, please call Mr. C at 484-707-1516.

Delivery Drivers Wanted The Valley Beat is seeking Drivers for many areas in the Lehigh Valley. Must have own car / ins. Reply to: distribution@thevalleybeat.com

Spacious apartment, just renovated Six rooms, apartment, new kitchen, New decor, all utilities paid, near transportation. $700/month 610-266-7300

2000 CHEVROLET MONTE CARLO 3.8L 6CYL, AUTOMATIC TRANSMISSION, 133,000 MILES ,TWO TONED LEATHER, RUNS GREAT ! MOONROOF, AC/CD POWER WINDOWS, POWER LOCKS,$5,600.00 / 267-251-4997 (Montgomery County)

Coopersburg- Rooms For Rent Weekly or Monthly. Cable Utilities and wifi included. Single & Double Occupancy. $80/week and up. Clean Private. 610-282-8010

1995 white Acura Integra, 119,000 miles, runs great, automatic, all power, sunroof, heat, and dc sports exhaust sway bars. $2,300 obo also looking for a trade bigger car / 484-6950775

2br - House for Rent! (Salisbury)One, 2-bedroom house for lease! (Rental rate is $900 per month) Private, off-street parking for tenants. Property is located in a scenic BARTENDER Roosevelt’s 21st is looking to wood area, but close to lot of amenitites! Close to I-78, just off hire experienced bartenders. of Emmaus Ave. $900/month 1328 West Tilghman St, For more info call: 610-972-7121 Allentown, PA 21 East Elizabeth Ave, Bethlehem, PA Send resume or apply in person at either location.

2001 Chevy Blazer 130k miles, automatic - runs and drives great, 4 new tires, new CD player, great motor and trans. $1995 / 484-788-9945

APPLY TODAY START TOMORROW!!! Leading Distribution Company is seeking experienced Sit down forklift operators. • Selecting / Order Picking Hotel Housekeeping (Comfort Inn Quakertown) • must be able to lift 50lbs. now accepting applications for • Pre-Employment Check / Drug the position of Room Attendant. • Screening Required is. Weekends are mandatory. No 941 Marcon Blvd Suite 101 Allentown, Pa 18018 calls please. Reply with resume or employment applications are 610-264-1200 available and being accepted at RESTAURANT hotel front desk 24 hours a day. Massage Therapist Seeking Massage Therapists Experience Preferred Call 610-262-9580

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

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PAGE 33

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THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013


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New Secretary

Mr. Johnson got himself a new secretary. She was young, sweet, and very polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open. When leaving the room, she said, “Mr. Johnson, your barracks door is open.” He did not understand her remark, but later on he happened to look down and saw that his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with his secretary. Calling her in, he asked, “By the way Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door was open this morning, did you also notice a soldier standing at attention?” The secretary, who was quite witty replied, “Why no sir, all I saw was a little disabled veteran sitting on two duffel bags.” Gambling It was little Johnny’s first day in a new school, so his father looked up the teacher. He told her that little Johnny was a good kid but that he was an avid gambler. He warned her that little Johnny might win lunch money from the other kids if he was not watched closely. The teacher did not seem disturbed, assured the father that she had handled many such problems and was very capable of taking care of little Johnny’s urge to gamble. Shortly after lunch, the father called the teacher and asked her how things were going. “Oh, everything is going very well.” She said. “I think I may have cured little Johnny of his gambling habit.” The father asked her what had happened. “The little tyke absolutely insisted on betting me ten dollars that I had a mole on my rear.” She said. “I finally agreed to the bet and took him to the teacher’s lounge to show him that I had no mole.” “Damn!” The father said. “He bet me fifty dollars this morning that he would see the teacher’s ass before the day was over.” Desperate Measures

PAGE 36

A couple were having financial problems until finally they couldn’t stand it any more. The husband said to his wife that is was necessary for her to make some money through prostitution to get by. So the husband drove her to the place where she had to do the job and in the evening he picked her up again. “So, how much have you earned today?” the husband asked. “Well”, the woman responded, “I’ve made one hundred dollars and fifty cents.” “That’s strange”, the husband responded, “who gave you the fifty cents?” Said the woman: “All of them, of course!” Pussy and Bitch A kid comes home from school and says to his mom, “Mom I’ve got a problem.” She says “Tell me.” He tells her that the boys at school are using 2 words he doesn’t understand. She asks him what they are. He says “well, pussy and bitch”. She says “Oh That’s no big deal, pussy is a cat like our little Mittens, and bitch is a female dog like our Sandy.” He thanks her and goes to visit dad in the workshop in the basement. He says to his dad, “Dad the boys at school are using words I don’t know, and I asked mom and I don’t think she told me the exact meaning. Dad says “Son, I told you never to go to mom with these matters, she cant handle them. What are the words?” He tells him...pussy and bitch. Dad says “OK” and pulls a Playboy down from the shelf, takes a marker and circles the pubic area of the centerfold and says, “son, everything inside this circle, is pussy.” “OK dad, so what’s a bitch?” “Son” he says, “everything outside that circle.”

READ THE DIGITAL ISSUE ONLINE GO TO THEVALLEYBEAT.COM

THE VALLEY BEAT JUNE 26, 2013

JOKES


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

PAGE 37


THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013 Page 38

AVAILABLE WHERE YOU BUY BEER

Please Drink Responsibly AllentownBeverage.com


KRISTY ANN

PHOTOS BY: VDARIUSPHOTOGRAPHY

SEE MORE PHOTOS ONLINE WWW.THEVALLEYBEAT.COM

THE VALLEY BEAT JULY 3, 2013

MODEL BEAT

Age: ?? Berks County, PA

Would you like to be considered for Model of the Week? Contact randy@donatellimodels.com or mickey@donatellimodels.com

PAGE 39

What do you do to make $$? Model, Print, Film, TV, Promotions Work at Victoria’s Secret & Bartend. Are you? Single, dating, engaged, or married? MARRIED TO A GREAT MAN. How would our readers get to know you or become your friend? FaceBook Kristy ann. OR Contact My Agent: Randy@DonatelliModels.Com. 610-921-5582-- Ask for Randy! Where was your best vacation destination? Destination Egypt. What do you do to relax? Work Out. What sports do you watch the most? Football. What is your favorite alcoholic beverage? Apple Martini. What happens to be your worst vice? My Cell Phone. What is your best feature? My Smile & Curves. What TV show do you never miss each week? Grey’s Anatomy. What movie would you recommend to our readers? The Goonies. What is at the top of your “Bucket List?” Skydiving. Are you a Spender or a Saver? Spender THANK GOD FOR A GREAT SUPPORTIVE HUSBAND! What have you done in the last year that you would think is news to our readers? MY MANY MODELING ACCOMPLISHMENTS. What do you sleep in? Depends on what mood my husband is in :) What is the worst pick-up line ever tried on you? Was your fall from heaven painful? What do you want guys to know about sex/ relationships that you wish they knew (but they don’t)!? Keep communication lines open & keep it interesting.


MUSIC GREAT ENTERTAINMENT... LIVE coming To iT’s cLosEr THan YoU THinK

dWiGht yoakam

michael mcdonald

los lobos los lonely boys alejandro esCovedo

seth meyers

JULY 3

JULY 7

JULY 10

JULY 12

slash ft. Myles Kennedy and the Conspirators

anti-social comedy tour

the ultimate thriller:

tony bennett

JULY 16

JULY 20

JULY 21

JULY 26

cheech & chonG/ War

bad company

impractical jokers

Ft. artie lanGe, daVe attell, amy schumer and hosted by jim norton

a michael jackson tribute shoW

VISION BAR

JULY 5

Digital getDown

JULY 6

JULY 28

JULY 29

JULY 31

aUg 2 – 4

grEaT Upcoming EvEnTs Godsmack – auGust 7 jay leno – auGust 11 the Wanted – auGust 24 Gabriel iGlesias – auGust 29

hanson Ft. paul mcdonald – september 2 the Queen extraVaGanza – september 13 russell brand – september 14 sarah briGhtman – september 22 steely dan – september 27

jOIN US BEfORE ANd AfTER ThE ShOw

jeFF FoxWorthy – september 28 celtic thunder – october 9 diana krall – october 10 bobby Vinton – october 19

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Issue 146 july 3, 2013  

The Valley's Hottest Alternative Weekly Free Newspaper

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