[The Stute] December 9, 2022 (Issue 13, Volume CXX)

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HAPPY HOLIDAYS DUCKS!

Men’s soccer ends historic season with their fnal four appearance

BY RUTHIE MULLISKY, SPORTS WRITER

On Thursday, December 1, the No. 4 ranked Stevens Men’s Soccer team traveled to Donald J. Kerr Stadium in Salem, VA to compete in the NCAA Division III Men’s Soccer Championship Semi fnals against No. 2 Univer sity of Chicago (UChicago). Unfortunately, the Ducks lost to UChicago in a hardfought battle after forcing an overtime period.

The team had an incredi ble season that will go down as one of the program’s most successful, with a 17-1-5 re cord, the program’s second ever NCAA fnal-four ap pearance, the frst being in 2008. Men’s Soccer also was the last collegiate New Jer sey soccer team, regardless of NCAA division or gender, to close its season, along with a staggering number

SEE SOCCER PAGE 2

StevensTHON hosts inaugrual Snow Ball

BY ADVAIT DANTULURI, STAFF WRITER

On December 4, Stevens

THON hosted their frst-ever Snow Ball. StevensTHON is a student organization that raises awareness and mon ey for Children’s Specialized Hospital, the local Children’s Miracle Network Hospital in New Brunswick, NJ, and is part of the Miracle Network Dance Marathon movement

across multiple schools. The main reason for host ing the StevensTHON Snow Ball was to put together a winter-themed semi-formal event for all Stevens students to enjoy all while supporting an amazing cause. Through a partnership with Hudson Dorms, $1260 was success fully raised during the event, and $1111 was matched by Hudson Dorms.

According to Avery Muril lo, the Internal Director and

Holiday events light up New Jersey and New York

BY BENJAMIN KNOBLOCH, NEWS EDITOR

The height of the holi day season is almost here, and both Stevens students and Hoboken residents are heralding it by putting out the last of the decorations, pulling out the heavy winter clothing, and getting ready for a robust slate of local events and celebrations.

The frst weekend of De cember was packed with things for those in the spirit to see and do. Hoboken held its City Hall Holiday Craft Fair on the 3rd and the frst day of a local holiday mar ket on the 4th. Meanwhile, a number of tree lightings took place on both sides of the Hudson River, from Wee hawken to Manhattan.

The remainder of the month holds many more op portunities for those looking to get in the spirit with their communities. Hoboken and surrounding northern New Jersey cities have festivities planned for the entire rest of the season, and many of New Jersey’s charming small towns may also draw your attention with attrac tions ranging from tree light ings to Christmas displays. On top of that, there’s New York’s usual world-class holiday entertainment just across the river.

Here’s a selection of some of the most noteworthy ac tivities to take part in this holiday.

Hoboken

Dec. 11 & Dec. 18 - Main Street Pops Holiday Market under the 14th Street Via duct: This holiday market features hand-made crafts from local artisans and art ists, including fashion ac cessories, jewelry, fne art, home decor, and food. The event will culminate with a “Holiday Extravaganza” on December 18th.

Dec. 11 - Santa Comes to Hoboken: Santa is coming to Hoboken with a host of elves, and will wind through the city on a parade foat. He’ll also make several stops, including in Church Square Park, to take photos with residents.

Weekends until Jan. 3 - Free parking w/ local pur chases at Garage B, Garage D, and Midtown Garage: From now until the begin ning of next year, parking in several Hoboken garag es will be free with proof of at least $20 in purchases from Hoboken businesses or restaurants.

Jerey City Dec. 10 - Heights Holiday Market at Riverview Fisk Park, Jersey City: A new hol iday market in Jersey City Heights, just west of Hobo ken.

Dec. 12 - Deck the Halls at Ashford, 145 Newark Ave, Jersey City: The Youth Foundation of Jersey City is hosting their 2nd Annual Holiday Fundraiser to sup port impoverished Jersey City youth, featuring yule tide carol performances. At tendees should bring a dona tion of gloves, hats, or socks.

Dec. 17 & 18 - Art Mar ket Holidays at 150 Bay St, Jersey City: Purchase local and handmade gifts at this holiday art market in Jersey City.

New York City Dec. 11 - Winter Cele bration at Brust Park, The Bronx, NY: Catch a Christ mas tree lighting, holiday music performances, and festive fare at Brust Park.

Select dates until Jan. 8 - Holiday Lights at the Bronx Zoo: According to the Bronx Zoo, “The park comes to life with holiday cheer as immersive light displays, custom-designed animal lanterns and animated light shows sparkle across the zoo.”

Until Jan. 14 & 16 - NYBG Glow and Holiday Train Show at 900 Southern Bou levard, The Bronx, NY: The New York Botanical Garden hosts New York City’s largest outdoor holiday light show as well as a long-running

Julia Baber, the Executive Director, students dined on food donated from Myron Mixon’s Pitmaster, Fat Taco, and H&S Giovanni’s Restau rant & Pizzeria. The event also served dessert with Krispy Kreme donuts. But if students weren’t interest ed in jam donuts, then they could still jam with student DJ Jake Laifer. For keep sakes, there was also a photo booth onsite, as well a rafes with prizes donated by Ath

Student Afairs appoints Dr. Takeem Dean as Assistant Vice President

BY EVAN PAPAGEORGE, STAFF WRITER

Student Afairs has recent ly announced its appointment of a new Assistant Vice Presi dent for Student Afairs: Ta keem L. Dean, Ed.D. Dean’s responsibilities will include supervising the “Ofce of Res idential Education, the Ofce of Residential and Dining Services, the Ofce of Diver sity, Equity, and Inclusion, and the Ofce of Community Standards and Title IX. He will also have institutional re sponsibilities for emergency response, compliance, assess ment of the student experi ence, and implementation of the Strategic Plan.”

Dean earned his Bachelor of Science in Business Edu cation and Master of Arts in Educational Leadership from Montclair State University. Dean continued his educa

leta, Wicked Scents, The Stu dio, Galatea, Stevens Cam pus Bookstore, and AirPods donated by Hudson Dorms. There were also fundraising activities to raise money for the Children’s Specialized Hospital in New Brunswick, New Jersey. Prizes included gift cards to CHOC·O·PAIN for the Fundraising Royalty, the highest fundraisers this week, and gift cards to Urban Coalhouse to whoever raised the most money each hour.

Updates on 2023 commencement ceremony

BY EVAN PAPAGEORGE, STAFF WRITER

As the end fall semester quickly approaches, much of the senior class is beginning to focus on the end of the spring semester and one day in particular: the commence ment ceremony. Commence ment marks a student’s completion of their time at Stevens. Yet amongst all of the endings, it is also a time of great beginnings: the start of the next chapter of their lives, the beginning of what they will do next, the com mencement of who they are.

On Monday, November 14, the Stevens Division of Student Afairs sent a schoolwide email announcing com mencement. The ceremony will be on Wednesday, May 24, 2022, in Newark, NJ, at the Prudential Center. The day will begin on the primary court of the center to confer the degrees of all undergrad uate, graduate, and doctoral candidates. Following the main ceremony, each school SEE 2023 PAGE 2

Leaders Impacting Technology leadership retreat

BY KATIE BLOOMER, OUTREACH CHAIR

On November 19, Ste vens students headed to Camp Mason for the Lead ers Impacting Technology (L.I.T) Leadership Retreat. Camp Mason is a YMCA summer camp located in Hardwick Township and is open to group trips such as school retreats. This event involved tackling intense ropes courses, completing team-building activities, and bonding with fellow stu dents along the way. Activity courses ranged from high to low ropes with some being the Giant Swing, Vertical Playpen, and Leap of Faith.

The activities were designed

to involve teamwork, en couragement from peers, and the practicing of leader ship skills.

Shaya Morgan, the Stu dent Life Coordinator, cre ated and coordinated the retreat, as it was the frst leadership retreat held by the Ofce of Undergradu ate Student Life. She started from scratch by creating the name, purpose, and goals of the event. Morgan also re cruited students, specifcally who were already leaders in the community and inter ested in building upon their leadership skills. At Camp Mason, she actively partici pated in the retreat activities

PULSE

PHOTO COURTESY OF JULIA BABER

PHOTO COURTESY OF SHAYA MORGAN

Executive Board

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

BUSINESS MANAGER

MANAGING EDITOR

LAYOUT EDITOR

MADHU ‘23

RAMELLI ‘23

KEENAN YATES ‘24

ZIV ‘24

OUTREACH CHAIR KATIE BLOOMER ‘25 DIGITAL MANAGER

SECRETARY

Editorial Board

NEWS EDITOR

SHAKER ‘23

THUMMBORST ‘23

AGUINAGA ‘23 NEWS EDITOR

SOCCER

1

of individual player accomplish ments. The team amassed a total of three All-America awards, fve All-Region selections, six Academ ic All-District players, and seven players making All-Middle Atlan tic Conference (MAC) Freedom Teams. Additionally, this game marked the end of the Duck’s im pressive undefeated game streak of 30, which went back to October 23 of the Fall 2021 season.

Although the Ducks were competing in an away match, the community support for the team remained the same, as the UCC Marketplace was the scene for a watch party for students and fac ulty to get together to support the team.

Operations Board

Staff & Contributors

Advait

Victoria Yashchuk

NOTICE A MISTAKE? Email us at eboard@thestute.com.

All opinions and editorials refect the views of their respective au thor(s). No Part of The Stute may be reproduced in any form, in whole or in part, without the written consent of the Editor-in-Chief. Cited refer ences of The Stute are permitted.

All members of the Stevens community are able to submit a Letter to the Editor to be published in The Stute. Letters must refer either to a piece published in The Stute or to The Stute in general and must be be tween 400 – 800 words in length. Submit letters to editor@thestute.com with your name and title (when applicable) or using our Google form. For writers who wish to write a Letter to the Editor anonymously, please see our policy on anonymity.

The Editorial Board reserves the right to choose whether or not to pub lish a submitted Letter to the Editor based on a majority rule vote, and additionally reserves the right to edit letters for clarity or request authors to revise. Provided that the author approves the fnal version, The Stute reserves the right to edit letters according to our copy editing procedures, defned in our policies.

All members of the Stevens community are able to submit a stand alone opinion piece (otherwise known as an Op-Ed) to be published in The Stute. Op-Eds must be between 400 – 800 words, but longer sub missions will be considered on a case-by-case basis. To submit an OpEd please email eboard@thestute.com with your name and title (when applicable) or using our Google form (tinyurl.com/submit-t0-stute). For writers who wish to write an Op-Ed anonymously, please see our policy on anonymity.

The Editorial Board reserves the right to choose whether or not to pub lish a submitted Op-Ed based on a majority rule vote, and additionally reserves the right to edit Op-Eds for clarity or request authors to revise. Provided that the author approves the fnal version, The Stute reserves the right to edit Op-Eds according to our copy editing procedures, de fned in our policies.

The frst half of regulation time was very dependent on feld po sition, as just about 80% of the game at that point was played in the middle of the feld. Graduate student Adam Silva added ofen sive pressure by being the frst of

L.I.T.

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alongside the students. According to Morgan, “the purpose of this retreat was for students to devel op leadership skills, practice team building, and create community here at Stevens in an efort to in spire new and current leaders to get involved and foster a holistic

2023

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will hold its own event to read each student’s name. The smaller cer emonies will also be on-site at the Prudential Center.

Stevens has not yet released

HOLIDAY

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1

train miniature show.

The whole season - Countless classic holiday activities and sights in New York

Small New Jersey Towns Livingston Township - Camuso Christmas Display: A beloved an

DEAN

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1

tion at Wingate University, earning an educational specialist degree and a Doctorate of Education in Higher Education and Higher Education Administration.

In his professional career, Dean has been working in higher educa tion for nearly 20 years. He began working in residential administra tion at institutions like Seton Hall University, North Carolina Central University, and The Julliard School. He returned to his Alma Mater at Montclair State University as a com munity director and then as Assitant to the Dean. He then went to Passaic County Community College as the Director of the Center for Student Involvement, Allen University, and Johnson C. Smith University as the Dean of Students. Before coming to Stevens, he worked at Union College he started as the Dean of Students before changing positions to be the Assistant Vice President of Student Development and the deputy Title IX Coordinator.

In a recent email, Student Af fairs praised Dean “has experience in nearly all facets of student life, including student conduct, athlet ics, campus recreation, student life, disability services, Title IX, diversi ty, equity and inclusion, residence life, admissions, student leadership, counseling services, veteran’s afairs, fraternity and sorority life, and career and professional development.”

either team to take a shot at the goal, doing so during the 11th min ute of the frst half. The Ducks had a strong presence in the midfeld, which prevented UChicago from pushing forward. This pressure contributed to UChicago only be ing able to make four shots against the Ducks, none of which were on goal.

The second half of regulation was more defensive for the Ducks. UChicago increased their ofensive pressure and nearly scored, but the Ducks successfully cleared the ball of the goal line to preserve the 0-0 score and force overtime. The sec ond half resulted in UChicago tak ing 11 shots and senior goalkeeper Justin Cross making three saves.

The pressure only increased in the frst half of overtime. Cross stopped two shots on goal that were 30 seconds apart only seven minutes into the overtime period. During the second half of overtime, UChicago scored the frst goal of the match in the 106th minute of the game. However, Cross’s per formance this season was stellar. With 21 saves over seven postsea

student experience here on cam pus.”

When talking about the stu dents, Morgan stated that “while it was cold outside, that didn’t stop them from climbing to new heights (both fguratively and literally).”

Overall, the retreat was a success. Students appreciated the oppor tunity to step away from campus and try something that they hadn’t experienced before. When doing

who will give the commencement address. The school is also com piling a list of hotels, parking lo cations, eateries, and other venues for families, friends, and guests of graduates. In the past, the com mencement ceremonies included music, the procession of students and staf, a commencement speak er, speeches from students, and

nual Christmas display created by toymaker Ernie Camuso will run until New Year’s Day. There will also be an event for children with special needs and their families on Saturday, December 17th, and a Menorah lighting on December 18th.

Maplewood - Dickens Village: This annual recreation of scenes from A Christmas Carol with a col lection of dioramas in miniature

son games, he fnished the season with a 0.44 goals-against average and a 0.863 save percentage as being named the 2022 MAC Free dom Tournament’s Most Valuable Player.

Men’s Soccer Head Coach Dale Jordan was very grateful for such an impressive season. He added, “What an incredible season! I am so proud of what the guys have achieved this year; they are an exceptional group of student-ath letes who are fantastic embassies for the soccer program, the athlet ic department, their school, their families, their communities, and for the state of New Jersey. I want to thank each of them for giving everything possible this season.” The coaching staf continued by thanking the graduating seniors and graduate students, the ath letes’ families for their continued support, the Stevens athletic de partment, and the sports medicine department and athletic train er. Though Men’s Soccer season comes to a close, it will be remem bered as one of the most successful in Stevens’ history.

the sometimes challenging or in timidating activities, they beneft ed from the support of classmates who were cheering them on. Giv en that it was a success, there are plans for another retreat in the Spring when it is warmer outside, so stay tuned for updates. Also, students should be on the lookout for the launch of the L.I.T. Lead ership Program if they are looking for more leadership opportunities.

other celebrations.

As part of commencement, Ste vens ofers resources for under graduates, graduates, and doctor al candidates whose degrees will be conferred. The school will post more resources for help with their yearbook photos, diplomas, and general information regarding the day and event itself.

houses will be open on the frst three Saturdays of December. De cember 10th and 17th will feature wagon rides and a petting farm, and a Menorah lighting will be held on December 21st.

Millburn - Winter Walk: Vis itors to Millburn will fnd Taylor Park illuminated by thousands of Christmas lights. Enjoy holiday music while walking through tun nels of lights until January 15th.

PHOTO COURTESY OF NJCU.EDU

Baby Pictures

Ofce Cleanup

Stute’s First TikTok

RRR-ing: The Stute edition

BY SANJANA MADHU, EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Welcome to the last issue of The Stute for the Fall 2022 semester. Inside you will fnd some end-of-the-semes ter news, photos from EC’s Winter Wonderland event, a few select opinion columns, a monthly calendar, a semes ter recap of what The Stute has accomplished this se mester, and wrapping paper. We encourage you to wrap your gifts to loved ones in this year’s wrapping paper, or utilize the paper as craft ing paper!

The last issue of the se mester also means it’s the last week you’ll hear from me about all things Stevens, The Stute, and life in gener al. The last issue also means that The Stute takes a break from printing and has time

to Rest, Remember, and Re fect (RRR). If you read my editorial last week, you’ve already been introduced to the concept of RRRing. But for those of you who are un familiar, RRR is a concept useful for recollecting your thoughts at the end of major events or periods of time in your life. Last week, I talked about how to RRR as a stu dent, so this week, I want to take some time to RRR for The Stute.

This year has been the frst year that The Stute was fully back in person since the COVID-19 pandemic. While last year had most of the nor malcy we were used to, there were still widespread mask mandates, canceled classes, and a variety of other chang es caused by the pandemic. Last year, we were also still

in the process of readjusting to in-person classes and our new printing schedule. But this year, we came back with strong momentum and new goals we wanted to accom plish.

Our frst goal before be ginning the semester was to hold our annual summer recruitment event, Stute Weekend. This year, we in vited 12 incoming freshmen to campus for a weekend to learn more about The Stute and contribute to our frst issue this academic year. The event has always been a sort of bonding experience for both the students and The Stute staf members who help run the event.

One of our largest goals this semester was to increase the size of our staf. Each is sue of The Stute is flled with

a Masthead and a Staf Box, showing you all the people who have contributed to that specifc Stute issue. A prob lem we noticed last year was that the number of contribu tors began to dwindle as the semester went on. Howev er, this year, we’re proud to have retained many writers, editors, photographers, etc. for The Stute! We’ve also in creased the number of stu dents on our minor board by flling two News Editor posi tions, a Sports Editor (which also allowed us to reinstate our sports section this year), an Assistant Layout Editor, an Assistant Copy Editor, an Assistant Business Manager, and another Social Media Manager. We also added a new “Comic Corner” to The Stute and have two comic strip artists!

Another goal for The Stute was to increase our presence online. While printed newspapers are cer tainly our strong suit, The Stute understands the im portance of having a strong digital footprint. One way we are accomplishing this goal is by increasing our social media presence. Through the hiring of a new social media manager, The Stute has started a Tik Tok ac count @thestute which we hope will be a fun way for students to get to know the inner workings of The Stute. The Stute has also taken on three student developers to start a self-guided project of developing a mobile applica tion!

The last goals for The Stute were more adminis trative. Firstly, we worked

last semester to order new, sturdier distribution racks around campus. This semes ter, we were able to install them across multiple cam pus hot spots. Additionally, another main task for this semester was moving into our new ofce in the UCC. After some organizing and cleaning, we’ve fnally re verted to using our ofce for newspaper production days.

To refect, this semester has been quite tumultuous, yet rewarding. I am incredi bly proud of the work that the staf members at The Stute put into our publication this semester, and I am curious to see what we accomplish within our 14 issues sched uled for next semester. As a closing note, good luck with fnals, and on behalf of The Stute, have a great holiday!

EDITOR IN CHIEF SANJANA MADHU

MANAGING EDITOR

KEENAN YATES

LAYOUT EDITOR ISABELLA ZIV BUSINESS MANAGER JORDYN RAMELLI

OUTREACH CHAIR

KATIE BLOOMER

DIGITAL MANAGER

BEMIN SHAKER SECRETARY ZANE THUMMBORST

The minorboard submitted old pictures of themselves in costumes to feature in the Halloween issue

Sanjana

The E-Board created our frst TikTok introducing themselves and their positions by “passing the phone”

ENTERTAINMENT COMMITTEE HOSTS ANNUAL WINTER WONDERLAND

Photos by Olof Persson and Ethan Che for The Stute

DEAR CLAIRE AND ETHAN...

Q: What should I get my friends for the holidays?

BY CLAIRE HANNAN ‘24

Now that we’ve entered December and the holidays are right around the cor ner, it’s ofcially the season of giving! While some peo ple fnd it easy to pick out considerate and thought ful gifts for all their friends, some (like myself) struggle

with the task. I personally fnd it hard to predict what things my friends will fnd valuable and worry that the gift might just wind up in the back of a drawer or the trash in a few months. For people with similar worries, I would recommend think ing about what things your friends might need or want, like some decorations for their rooms or some selfcare items they wouldn’t buy themselves. You could also make something by hand if you’re a creative person, but that’s usually better for fam ily members than friends. But the best way to fgure out what your friends might want is to listen to what they complain about and think

MIND OF A FRESHMAN Til next time

through the act of accepting.

about what you can do to make that better.

It’s also important to not put too much pressure on yourself to get the perfect gift, because usually, the per fect gift doesn’t exist. Your friends probably already have everything that they need, so it’s ok to get them a silly gift that will make them laugh for a few weeks, or something nice that they might have bought for them selves anyway. Also, if all else fails, don’t be ashamed to get your friend a gift card to their favorite store. By choosing a place you know they use of ten, you can show that you’re paying attention, and you don’t have to worry about it not being used.

BY ETHAN KLESCHINSKY ‘24

It’s that time of the year again when your Secret Santa is approaching and you haven’t managed to decide on a gift, and like normal you have come to me to receive my advice. I assume you are plan ning on a budget because

you don’t have money like that, but we can make it work. At this point, you’re cutting it close. You can try to expedite shipping to the Stevens mailroom, but they’ll just lose your package, putting you back at square one. After the mailroom falls through, you can probably try the Newport Mall in Jer sey City, but I don’t have much advice outside of that. When it comes to what to get them, you have to know your audi ence. I do not know your friends so for you to ask me to pick a gift for them is crazy.

You know your friends, just get them something

OFF THE PRESS

and I’m sure they’ll ap preciate it — and if they don’t, I’m fairly confident they won’t be comfortable enough to tell you that. Get your friends bad gifts to test if you are close enough to tell each oth er the truth, that is my advice for this week. You should get me a gift for giving you all this advice. I need to start accepting tips and donations. Feel free to leave me a gift in The Stute office if you feel so inclined. With this be ing the last issue of the semester I will wish you a happy holiday and have fun with finals!

BY TANISHKA KAPOOR ‘26

The days pass by as we rush towards fnals week, almost crossing the fnish line for this frst semester. It’s funny how it seems like just yesterday we all were trying to settle into college. Now, our residence halls have become like our second homes.

The year began with what I would describe as a scram ble for acceptance. In an arid land devoid of a proper support system, we wanted to feel a sense of belong ing. After all, this was go ing to be the place we would spend the majority of our time existing. We also went

SENIORITIS

As we met new people, each with their unique stories, we learned to accept their presence and friendship. I always like to say, “you nev er know who you are going to meet and what they will teach you,” and college has proven that to be true. Each person here has broadened my perspective so much that I have grown to value people a lot.

I think probably the toughest part of acceptance was coming to terms with the fact that we are growing and moving on as we took a huge step towards indepen dence. For some, college is just what they had desired. A break from home, no reg ulations, and the ability to live on your own terms.

For others, it started with a surge of homesickness and difculties in adjusting to this new environment.

Regardless of the type of person, we all have at some point felt the lack of comfort and warmth, which can only be found in what we call our

home by the people that we feel a sense of belonging with.

By the time we felt like we had relatively settled in, midterms rolled around. It was not only the frst real test of our academic abilities, but it also was a trial of how well we managed our sched ule. With so many options for activities and things to do, midterms asked us the question, “Will you priori tize me?” Of course, we need to remember that at the end of the day, college is here to provide an education and an experience. For some, midterms were not the most challenging, while for others they really tested students’ mental strength and disci pline.

As midterms ended and time led us into Novem ber, I feel like we entered the calmest part of the frst semester: a change into cooler weather, earlier nights, and a scent of fes tivities. November marked the time when we under stood what it meant to be

at college and realized our strengths and weaknesses. We took a breath of fresh air as we progressed towards Thanksgiving with feelings of gratitude.

They say before every good thing comes challeng es. On the brink of our frst semester, we will be chal lenged once again with f nals. After that, however, we break free into winter break, which I hope will be flled with joyous moments and happy memories.

As we approach the com pletion of many of our col lege frsts, I would like to end this last piece by telling you that you should be proud of yourselves. The frst semes ter at college is probably one of the toughest adjustments, and you made it! Whether you stumbled across this fnish line or briskly ran through it, you should be proud of your accomplish ments and hardships.

So, until next time, I wish everyone happy holi days and the best of luck for this last step.

The app sampler, pt. II: and now I wait

BY CHARLES BEALL ‘22

This past Saturday, I hit the submit button on all my applications for Ph.D. programs in mathematics.

I ended up applying to fve schools, which was nar rowed down from the 10 or so schools I had on the shortlist for much of the fall semester. It will be a while until I hear back — March at the latest — as if, after my appetizer, the cook is taking a lot of time on a surprise main course.

My initial feeling was one of true excitement and

relief. I had been working on these applications for a few months, hoping to submit them a little sooner, but I’m very happy with how they came out. Even with the non-refundable application fees and flling out the same personal information, past experiences, and letter writ er pages fve times, it was a very worthwhile and fairly enjoyable endeavor.

After that frst wave of good feelings, I’ve gotten a bit more ponderous about the app process, and what it means for my future. My favorite thing about appli cations is that I know no one else will be submitting one under the name Charles Beall. My app is my own, and I feel very proud of the work I’ve done to get to this point. But the darker side of that is, now people I don’t know will have to judge the small representation of my entire personality and skill set against a slew of strong and impressive applications.

Will I be able to stick out from all the others? And if not, what does that mean?

I’ve spent my whole time at Stevens with the expectation of continuing school at the graduate level, and eventu ally getting a Ph.D. But now is the moment of truth, and after I hit that submit but ton, it’s all out of my hands. The statistics aren’t much in my favor, either—many peo ple who apply to Ph.D. pro grams do not get in.

I have to take a step back and realize that now is the time to wait, but not to worry. Submitting these applications was a big ac complishment for me, and now I have the opportunity to make more achievements in other areas. I can focus on fnishing out my fall se mester strong, on my senior research project, which I have more time to commit to now, and on enjoying my last semester as a Stevens undergrad in the spring.

And I hope that the sur

prise main course comes out to be a beautiful display of food. That is the best op tion, but even if it happens, there are many more things to think about. Will the food actually be good, or does it just look really nice? What if there turn out to be multiple options—how will I choose? These are tough questions, but I will be better equipped to answer them in a little while. Right now, I plan to answer the questions right in front of me, and that’s all any of us can do.

If you are applying for job or research opportu nities, or (for some of my fellow seniors) who have already accepted ofers, I want to shout out all of you for the hard work you are doing. I believe in you, and I hope you get to celebrate once you hit that submit button, and again when you hear back good news. More importantly, in between, I hope that we’ll be ok in the waiting.

Student becomes corporation

BY OFF CENTER

—SATIRE—

After hearing about how “corporations and people are basically the same,” and “corporations make a lot of money,” one entrepreneurship-minded business student saw an opportunity to get first hand startup experience and has now become a corporation. We caught up with Big Money Corps Inc. for more on how he went from “Dave” to a major multinational corporation traded on the NYSE.

“It started as a senior design project back when I was a person and a fi nance major,” Big Money Corps said in an official company statement, “but it’s really annoying filing all these extra forms with the SEC and having to tell all my shareholders every thing I’m doing with my life.” Shareholders have the chance to buy stock in Big Money Corps Inc. and can vote on decisions like if Dave should become a vegetarian or if he should walk through the park on his way home this week. The easiest part so far has been having an HR de partment, but the compa ny has struggled to raise capital since no one really cares if Dave goes through the park or not. Also, be cause corporations are le gally separate from their owner, which is the stock holders and not Dave, it becomes a very existential crisis of identity.

In his spare time now, Big Money Corps Inc. has begun doing more things that corporations and people do. He’s al ready filed thirty lawsuits against people infringing on his intellectual proper ty and plans to file more even though we told him that what most people call “thoughts” can’t be legal ly owned. The most inter esting lawsuit out there right now is a trademark infringement on everyone else named Dave. We, un fortunately, cannot com ment on it due to its on going nature and the fact

that one of our reporters, the one who interviewed Big Money Corps, is named Dave himself.

Dave/Big Money Corps has enjoyed contributing to elections far beyond what anyone should be allowed to donate to po litical campaigns and has started paying himself a salary. He’s asking him self for a raise next week and remembered to ask for a little more than he real ly wants so he has room to negotiate down. Mean while, Big Money Corps is expecting Dave to ask for a raise next week and is worried because as the only employee, he has a lot of leverage. The largest internal dispute within the company is the poten tial for unionization due to the low number of em ployees (one) that would need to vote in favor of a union for it to pass. Dave is planning on filing a workplace malpractice suit against Big Money Corps but is running into issues with conflict of in terest in the courts, and no judge wants to let a guy walk back and forth between the plaintiff and defendant desks argu ing with himself in their courtroom.

Dave plans to commit tax fraud and misrepre sent the financial state of the company to investors. He also wants to start pay ing investors using other investors’ money in what many of us call a Ponzi scheme. Big Money Corps denies the allegations by the rogue employee, but would not comment on why he is still employed by the company. With im peccable logic, Dave told us that “they’d never fire me because they are me.”

As a show of good will, we bought 10% of Big Money Corps and are planning on voting for him to become a vegetar ian. We think we can form a coalition with some of the other owners to force Dave to become a TikTok influencer as well.

Opinion

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

BY VICTORIA YASHCHUK ‘26

Challenge is one of the best and most critical com ponents of life. While chal lenge is perceived to be an tagonizing and inevitable, it allows us to develop in in teresting ways. The beauty of challenge is its ability to change perception and ma turity, and the best thing about challenge is that it motivates us to push for ward, to challenge, and be challenged in ways that did not seem possible before.

The most painful yet sentimental obstacle for anyone is when they are challenged by another, for we do not roam the grounds of Earth to live in loneli ness. Everyone has heard the phrase “opposites at tract,” but how diferent are we really from each other?

SPOILER ALERT

Objectively speaking, we are always curious about things we deem impossi ble, based on restraints we set for ourselves. Those re straints and limitations are what make the perception of living a long and difcult one, and when boundaries are tested, the perception of a difcult and extensive life becomes one of cold ness and the need to guard oneself.

The classic novel Pride and Prejudice, by Jane Aus ten, is a powerful represen tation of love and emotion, as Austen leads the reader through an experience of strong personalities and stubborn attitudes. Austen takes a diferent approach to the term “love,” in the sense that perception over powers every feeling and emotion possible.

The reader is presented with a menagerie of char acters that contribute to the plot. Austen introduces us to the heroine and hero of the story, Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Fitzwilliam Dar cy. Elizabeth is the main protagonist, as the story centers itself around Eliz abeth’s lack of self-aware ness and lack of ability to

fnd a husband, for mar rying is the best thing a woman can do, according to history. Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth challenge each other’s calibers in a way that creates a tangible ten sion and competitiveness leading them to become the ideal pair. The novel con tains numerous characters, each one contributing to the tension between Bennet and Darcy, as betrayal ac companies love.

When they frst meet, Elizabeth’s perception of Mr. Darcy is cynical and negative, as her interpreta tion of Mr. Darcy was based on his closed-of manner accompanied by the sto ries she heard from George Wickham, the godson of Mr. Darcy’s late father, break ing any relations Wickham and Mr. Darcy had. Adding onto Mr. Darcy’s antago nizing caliber, he separated his best friend, Mr. Bing ley, from Elizabeth’s sister, Jane Bennet, due to false observations and assump tions.

Darcy’s newfound devo tion to Elizabeth becomes conspicuously undeniable, but his overly proud and en titled character is rejected

by Elizabeth, causing him humiliation. Elizabeth’s re jection was obvious enough, until her reasons to dislike Darcy were found to be completely false and based on unjust accusations. The judgmental, introverted, and intuitive manners of Elizabeth and Darcy frst caused their separation, but eventually caused them to come together as Eliza beth begins reciprocating Darcy’s afection. With the world being full of people who do not understand Darcy and Elizabeth, the misunderstood understand each other perfectly.

With Austen captivat ing Darcy’s and Elizabeth’s romance as the major oc currence of the plot, Aus ten simultaneously utilizes Elizabeth’s point of view to show how the life of a woman drastically difers from that of a man’s. As Elizabeth and Darcy create their story, the attempts at romance of other feminine characters, that being Eliz abeth’s sisters, are shown, illustrating how diferent the life of a married wom an is compared to a single woman. With each charac ter representing masculin

Die Hard: The Greatest Christmas Movie of All Time

BY COLE GARDELLA ‘24

That’s right folks, I am one of the many people that know Die Hard is a Christ mas movie, and no, it’s not just because it takes place during the holidays. Is there some potential bias in my belief because Die Hard is my favorite movie of all time? Potentially. However, I’m not here to argue about the genre of movie that this flm is, I’m here to review this classic action flm, so let’s get on with it.

Directed by John Mc Tiernan, Die Hard takes place during an ofce Christmas party in which

New York City cop John McClane, played by New Jersey native Bruce Willis, visits his estranged wife Holly and unexpectedly fnds himself in the wrong place at the wrong time when thieves come into the ofce building and hold the party hostage, leaving only McClane to take all of them down single-handedly. Wil lis’s comedic chops shine through with his quick wit ty remarks about the situ ation he has found himself in, but that’s not to say his performance is one-note. In particular, a scene in a bathroom where he admits he should have handled his separation from his wife better is masterfully done and isn’t cut short by action or comedy, truly allowing the dramatic weight of the moment to sink in.

As much as I love Bruce Willis and his performance in this movie, it is the late great Alan Rickman, who I’m sure most of you know from his portrayal of

Severus Snape in the Harry Potter franchise, who has the best performance in the movie as the leader of the group of thieves, Hans Gruber. In his frst feature flm role, Rickman deliv ers what is, in my opinion, the greatest villain perfor mance in any movie ever, aside from a particular Sith Lord. Rickman has a very calm presence as Gru ber, rarely raising his voice and preferring to use his actions and weapons to in still fear into the hostages. In my opinion, the perfor mances of Willis and Rick man are the movie’s great est strengths.

In addition to being the greatest Christmas mov ie in history, Die Hard is also a fantastic action mov ie. The setting of an ofce building that’s under con struction is fairly unique and leads to some unique set pieces as well as some gnarly deaths that like ly wouldn’t be possible in a diferent setting. While

it may be a bit of a tired trope nowadays, the gener al plot of an everyman hero against a large group of vil lains was popularized by Die Hard, which would end up redefning the action genre as we know it; plen ty of movies follow simi lar plot lines. Speed ? Die Hard on a bus. Air Force One? Die Hard on a plane. Paul Blart: Mall Cop? You guessed it, that’s just Die Hard in a mall. McTier nan’s masterpiece has in fuenced and will continue to be an infuence on action flms for a long, long time.

In summary, Die Hard is undoubtedly a classic flm, regardless of genre. Captivating performances from Bruce Willis and Alan Rickman, as well as some of the best action scenes in cinema history, are just a few of the numerous rea sons to check this fick out no matter the time of year. Until next semester, Yippee Ki-Yay and Happy Holidays Ducks!

BY VITAK SABATH

PHOTO COURTESY OF THEMOVIEDB.ORG

ity and femininity in their own way, every character carries their power grace

fully and is the most real istic romance novel I have read thus far.

PHOTO COURTESY OF BARNESANDNOBLE.COM

ROVING REPORTER

By Rafael Lee Li

Brendan Probst ‘22 “Imma work on Quae and go skiing at least once.”

Marcos Salazar ‘23 “Not fexing, but I’m going to France, Switzerland, and Spain.”

Kieron Ampaw ‘26 “Play Valorant.”

Bryn Kanagy ‘25 “Spend time with family and friends from high school.”

India Roemlein ‘24

Kayleigh Bowler ‘24 “Recover”

Noah Miller ‘26 “Relax, travel, and catch up with friends and family.”

Kristen Williams ‘23 “I run track so I will work out. And read stories.”

Stephen