Redditors short Canvas stock in shocking new development

Who is Trenchcoatmaster and how has he won multiple battles against Wall Street?

After Redditors, users of a popular social news platform, battled against major hedge fund Jaime and Sons, everyone was on pins and needles to predict their next move. The FBI turned over almost 100 chatrooms with the Redditors to try and see if the public had any information about the users and their next plan. Seeing that most of the Redditors were either in school or just out of school the motive was clear at least to the head investigators.

“We know that most of the groups are younger and have a motive against school and any sort of structure that confines them,” said lead agent on the case Suzan Adamick. Their next target was Canvas and other school platforms like Google Classroom and Schoology. The stock has been slowly declining over the past few days but this wasn’t anything to be alarmed about. This morning the stock plugged more than 100 points making the value of each stock less than a dollar. This set the DOW down by almost 30 points, losing almost a billion dollars for large investors and investment firms again.

“This is unacceptable, they took 100 million dollars from me, that’s 1/100th of my weekly spending!” said the handsome debonair billionaire Jeff Bezos.

As to what’s going to happen after this ensuing madness, we’re not sure. The FBI and CIA have launched probes into all chat rooms on Reddit that involve stocks and the handsome Jeff Bezos. The head of one one of the largest stock chat rooms, “Trenchcoatmaster,” was linked with a Ventura High School clique known as the Trenchcoat Mafia. More and more of the Trenchcoat Mafia has come out against Wall Street and late capitalist America.

“The middle man has no way of building up wealth in America, we just live under the thumbs of our capitalist overlords,” said Trenchcoatmaster. Public opinion of the Trenchcoat Mafia has long been divided. Their political beliefs, ambitions, and how they act at school has always been a hot button topic with the students of VHS and other neighboring schools.

“They’re cool, but I’ve heard some weird stuff about them” said senior Jocelyn Lee.

More and more plans have been exposed by the FBI trying to thwart the Trenchcoat Mafia and its leaders’ plans, but they keep coming up with new and innovative ways to outsmart the FBI while making sure they have the last laugh.

“I’m not compelled to tell the public my plans for the next couple of months, it’s very volatile information that the Wallstreet of the FBI wouldn’t take kindly to,” said Trenchcoatmaster.

Whatever the future holds in regards to these brave men fighting against the capitalist agenda and the many demons that plague it, they will always find a way to make sure all of the hudgefunds and the billionaires are afraid of them and the power they wield.