MAN Magazine - Summer 2025

MAN FREE

“A £10 free bet led me to prison”

BOOST

TESTOSTERONE NATURALLY

EAT RIGHT FEEL GREAT COLD SHOWERS HYPE OR HEALING? BREATHE LIKE A NAVY SEAL

DUNCAN FERGUSON

Football’’s hardest man opens up

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Welcome to the Summer 2025 issue.

When I took over this magazine several years ago, my goal was simple: sneak a few wellbeing articles into the classic men’s mag mix of sport, cars, music, and fashion. Like hiding your medicine in a tasty doughnut.

But, from this issue on, we’re done hiding. You’ll notice a stronger focus than ever on subjects that can help you feel better – physically, mentally, and emotionally. That’s because, right now, we as men need support more than ever. Suicide is still the biggest killer of men under 50. Three-quarters of those who die by suicide are male. That’s too important to ignore – or to keep pretending that self-care has to be tucked away behind pages of horsepower and grooming products.

That doesn’t mean we’ve gone all serious. We still want this to be an entertaining read. But we’re no longer hiding our core aim: to help men navigate modern life – with all its challenges – and thrive, not just survive.

This issue takes a clear-eyed look at anxiety, loneliness, and body image. We also dive into practical tools – like cold showers, box breathing, and a 24-hour phone detox – that might just change how you feel.

I hope you enjoy the issue. More than that, I hope it helps – even just a little.

Rob Executive Editor

COVER CREDITS:

Cover Photographer: Sam Fielding/Alamy.com

Executive Editor: Lee Gatland

Art Director: Richard Hejsak

Managing Editor: Rob McGarr rob@sevenstarmedia.co.uk

Sales Team: 01959 543 650 sales@sevenstarmedia.co.uk

Published by

SEVEN STAR MEDIA LTD

184 Main Road, Biggin Hill, Westerham, Kent Tel: 01959 543659 sevenstarmedia.co.uk

Disclaimer: Man Magazine is published bi-annually (twice per annum) by Seven Star Media Ltd. No part of Man Magazine may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmitted to any form without permission. Views expressed in the magazine are not necessarily those of Seven Star Media Ltd, and are included to provide advice only. No content is a substitute for professional medical advice. During printing, images may be subject to a 15% variation. © Copyright of content belongs to individual contributors with the magazine copyright belonging to Seven Star Media Ltd. All rights reserved. Please either keep this magazine for future reference, pass it on for somebody else to read, or recycle it.

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HOW WE MAKE MAN MAGAZINE

First, we cherry-pick the world’s best writers in the fields of sport, style, cars, music, comedy, health & fitness, travel, adventure, and more.

Then we let them write the stories they want to tell.

The stories that matter.

And finally, we give it all away for free. Because when it’s this good, every man deserves to read it.

The result is the world’s greatest magazine for men who want the best of everything.

WHY WE MAKE MAN MAGAZINE

This is the important bit. We know that being a man can be tough sometimes. Looking after your mental health, and helping your friends and family do the same, has never been more important. That’s why we work with Mind and CALM, two of the UK’s leading mental health charities. We want to help end the stigma around mental health and ensure that every man gets the support he needs.

Heavy lifting for a lighter mind HEAVY LIFTING FOR A LIGHTER MIND

New research shows that stronger muscles are linked to lower rates of depression — and that hitting the weights might be just as good for your head as it is for your physique.

We all know exercise is good for our bodies – but a new study shows it can benefit your mental health too.

A study published in the Journal of Affective Disorders found that adults with more muscle mass and stronger grip strength were significantly less likely to experience depression.

Researchers looked at data from nearly

5,000 adults and found a clear connection: the stronger the muscles, the lower the risk of depression. People with the highest levels of muscle mass and grip strength had up to a 44% lower chance of being depressed compared to those with the lowest levels.

The benefits were most significant in adults aged 40 to 59 – the age when muscle naturally starts to decline – which shows the importance of staying active as we get older.

Resistance training does more than just build muscle – it can strengthen your defence against mental health struggles, too.

SEASON WE’RE GOING UP FROM 128 TO

A new study shows that losing just 37 minutes of sleep each night can noticeably lower your resilience, sense of purpose, and overall wellbeing – while turning in earlier can have the opposite effect.

REST ASSURED

REST ASSURED W

e’ve all been there. Thinking about heading to bed but instead opting for just one more episode, a few more scrolls of Instagram, or a late-night tumble down a YouTube rabbit hole. It doesn’t feel like a big deal. After all, we’re adults. No one can tell us when to go to bed. And what difference does half an hour really make? Well, according to new research, a much bigger difference than you might think.

In a study published in The Journal of Positive Psychology, young adults were randomly assigned to follow one of three sleep schedules over a five-day workweek: sleep restriction, sleep extension, or maintaining their usual routine. Using wristband monitors

and psychological surveys, researchers tracked how these subtle changes in bedtime impacted key aspects of mental health.

The findings were striking. Participants who slept 37 minutes less per night experienced declines in resilience, gratitude, and overall life satisfaction. In contrast, those who went to bed just 46 minutes earlier than normal showed significant improvements in all of those areas.

“Subtle changes in nighttime sleep influence the components that underlie mental wellbeing,” the researchers wrote. That means better sleep isn’t just a nice-tohave – it’s a powerful tool for boosting mental strength and emotional balance.

So next time you’re tempted to stay up late, remember: that extra episode might be costing you more than you think.

Discover the powerful breathing technique used by Navy SEALs, athletes, and top performers to stay calm under pressure. You can reduce stress, lessen anxiety, enhance focus, and improve performance — all in just a few minutes a day.

BE A BETTER YOU

Modern life is relentless. Whether you’re grinding at work, juggling responsibilities at home, or navigating the pressures of relationships, stress is an unavoidable part of being a man. But what if a simple breathing technique could help you master your mind, lower stress levels, and enhance focus?

Enter box breathing, a method so effective that it’s used by elite soldiers, top athletes, and high-performing executives to stay cool under pressure.

What is box breathing?

Box breathing, also known as foursquare breathing, is a deep breathing technique designed to regulate the autonomic nervous system. It’s a simple, structured exercise that involves four equal parts:

1. INHALE DEEPLY through your nose for a count of four seconds.

2. HOLD your breath for four seconds.

3. EXHALE SLOWLY through your mouth for four seconds.

4. HOLD your breath again for four seconds.

5. REPEAT the cycle for several minutes.

The goal is to create a steady, controlled breathing pattern that signals to your body that it’s safe to relax. Over time, this practice can help lower heart rate, decrease cortisol levels (the stress hormone), and improve overall emotional regulation.

Why box breathing works

Breathing techniques like box breathing aren’t just about mindfulness – they’re backed by science. According to research from Harvard Medical School, controlled breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which counters the body’s fightor-flight response. This helps lower

blood pressure, reduces anxiety, and promotes a sense of calm.

A study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that deep breathing exercises, including box breathing, significantly reduce symptoms of anxiety, enhance cognitive performance, and improve emotional regulation.

Another study from Stanford Medicine highlights how slow, controlled breathing can synchronise brain waves, leading to increased focus and mental clarity.

Elite military units, including the Navy SEALs, rely on box breathing to stay composed in high-stress combat situations. “The first thing we do when we’re about to enter an intense operation is control our breathing,” says former Navy SEAL commander Mark Divine. “If you can control your breath, you can control your mind.”

THE BENEFITS OF BOX BREATHING

Practicing box breathing for just a few minutes a day can yield powerful benefits:

1

REDUCED STRESS AND ANXIETY

A study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that controlled breathing techniques significantly reduce symptoms of anxiety and improve overall emotional well-being. By focusing on your breath, you shift your attention away from thoughts and stressors, creating a natural form of meditation.

2

ENHANCED FOCUS AND PERFORMANCE

Ever felt scattered before an important meeting, match, or test? Box breathing sharpens concentration by increasing oxygen flow to the brain. Many top athletes, including LeBron James and Michael Phelps, incorporate breathwork into their pre-game routines to optimise mental clarity and performance.

3

IMPROVED SLEEP QUALITY

Struggling to fall asleep? Box breathing slows the heart rate and quiets the mind, making it easier to drift off. Studies from the National Sleep Foundation show that deep breathing exercises before bed can lead to deeper, more restorative sleep.

4

BETTER PHYSICAL RECOVERY

After a tough workout, proper breathing can boost recovery by reducing muscle tension and increasing oxygen circulation. This is why breath control is a core component of yoga and many martial arts.

\\ IF YOU CAN CONTROL YOUR BREATH, YOU CAN CONTROL YOUR

HOW TO BUILD BOX BREATHING INTO YOUR DAY

The best part about box breathing? You can do it anywhere. Here’s how to make it a habit:

MORNING RESET (START YOUR DAY RIGHT)

Before grabbing your phone in the morning, take five minutes to practice box breathing. This sets a calm, focused tone for the day ahead.

PRE-PERFORMANCE (BEFORE A BIG MOMENT)

Feeling nervous before a big presentation, date, or workout? Take a few minutes to box breathe and centre yourself, then walk in with confidence and clarity.

WORK BREAKS (COMBAT THE AFTERNOON SLUMP)

Instead of reaching for caffeine at 3pm, try a few rounds of box breathing. It can re-energise you and improve focus without the crash you’ll get after the spike from an energy drink.

NIGHTTIME WIND-DOWN (BETTER SLEEP)

Use box breathing before bed to transition from the day’s stress to a state of relaxation. Try pairing it with meditation or light stretching for an even more powerful effect.

THE BOTTOM LINE

Life will always throw challenges your way. But the way you handle stress and adversity determines whether you thrive or struggle. Box breathing is a tool – one used by the world’s most elite performers – that helps you gain control over your mind and body.

It takes just a few minutes, requires zero equipment, and has been scientifically proven to reduce stress, enhance focus, and improve sleep. So why not give it a shot? Next time you feel overwhelmed, take a breath. Count to four. Control your mind.

With just a few minutes of box breathing, you can reduce stress, sharpen your focus, and improve your overall well-being.

\\ LIFE WILL ALWAYS THROW CHALLENGES YOUR WAY //

From a £10 free bet to prison: tookgamblingHow over my life – and how I took it back

No one plans to become addicted. But as Naman’s story shows, a single bet can spiral into something far darker – and much harder to escape. His journey from gambling harm to prison, and eventually to healing, is a powerful reminder that recovery is possible.

Just one bet – what could go wrong?

I was 18 when I placed my first bet. I’d never been into gambling, even though my mates did it. But one day, I saw an advert on TV that offered £10 for free if you bet £10 – and who says no to free money? That was the start of something that ultimately led me to prison.

We didn’t grow up with much. We lived in a council house. My dad was physically, emotionally, and psychologically abusive towards all of us. My mum worked hard but never had any money. I saw that as a child and I made it my aim – my goal in life – to be able to provide for her financially. And that’s where the gambling started.

I wanted to change my mum’s life. Instead, I destroyed my own

At the time, I had a really good job as an assistant psychologist. I was earning a decent amount of money. I could have quite easily, eventually, bought my mum a house within good time – but impatience just took over.

At first, I only bet on sports I knew –cricket, tennis, football, basketball, NFL. I was betting on things I knew and would win some money — but then I started losing. And that’s when things changed.

I got desperate. I started betting not just on things I knew, but betting on anything. I started branching out to baseball, hockey – sports I had never watched in my life. I was just really desperate to win and feel something within me. It was that adrenaline, that buzz, that high, that I really desperately

\\ I WAS GAMBLING ON

NEVER

– I JUST NEEDED THAT BUZZ

Fraud, prison, and the truth

When the losses started stacking up, I resorted to stealing money from family. I told myself I’d take the money, double it, and put it back. My family started to find out, of course. They showed me statements. At this point, I kind of knew something was wrong –but I couldn’t accept it.

I fell into depression, because I didn’t know how to get out of something that I knew was wrong. It felt like it was my job to wake up and gamble. I’d do anything to get money. And that’s sadly what I did.

I committed fraud and that landed me in prison. That’s when my family realised I wasn’t doing it for fun – which is what a lot of people think –they realised I couldn’t stop. They realised it was a serious issue that was harming me.

In our culture, addiction isn’t talked about

There is obviously a stigma with gambling harms in general, but in Asian communities –like mine – it’s layered. There’s two things that are always spoken about. One is “behsthi”, which means shame upon the family. The other main one is “log kya kehen gay” – what will people say?

And you worry about those things — because if you speak about your gambling harms, will you get the response you need? Which is: I will support you. I’m here to support you. I want to understand you. You’re scared that instead of help, you’ll be met with silence or shame.

Released… but not free

But when I came out of prison, I didn’t care about those things anymore. My mum had forgiven me, God had forgiven me – that’s all that mattered to me. And if my mum doesn’t like me speaking about my experience to help others, that doesn’t matter to me, because religiously we are encouraged to do so.

I threw myself into recovery. I was super motivated. I went to my probation meetings all the time. I told them: I want to get help, I want to do this, I want to do that. I’ll apply for any job, I’ll do any job. I just want to move forward.

Rock bottom – again

Then I got a letter saying I’d been placed on the adult barred list. That meant I couldn’t return to psychology. I couldn’t work as an assistant psychologist. And that came down on me like a ton of bricks. I felt lost all over again. And I turned back to gambling.

This time, it wasn’t just about making money. It was about escaping the reality I was going through at that point.

stuck in a hole. I was drowning in debt. I had lost friends and family. I thought there was no chance people would forgive me. I was depressed. I was suicidal.

But here I am. I’ve graduated from a Master’s. I’m helping others. I’m working for lived experience groups. I use my story to help others who are going through what I once was.

I spoke to my probation officer. I pleaded with her. I literally begged her. I said: I need your help because I’m gambling again. I need your help. But she didn’t contact me back. And my mum chucked me out of the house. She didn’t want me to go, but she knew she had to protect herself and my little brothers.

The win I never thought possible

If I was speaking to myself in the middle of my gambling, from where I am now, I wouldn’t believe me. Because, at that time, my whole life is gambling. There was no way out. I was

I’ve rebuilt those bridges with my family –and that means the world to me.

Back then, I couldn’t see a way out. But I’m proof that recovery is possible. It can happen. You have to be consistent with your journey. You’ve got to put yourself first

The life you want is still there. You just have to start moving towards it – and keep going.

If you’re worried about your own gambling, or someone else’s, visit GambleAware. org for advice, tools and support. You can also live chat or call the National Gambling Helpline 24/7 on 0808 8020 133.

TEST’ING TIMES

Tthat testosterone levels in men typically decline by about 1% per year after the age of 30.

1

lifestyles aren’t doing men any favours. High stress, poor diets, lack of exercise, and exposure to endocrine-disrupting chemicals (like BPA from plastics) have all contributed to a significant decline in testosterone levels compared to previous generations. Throw in excessive screen time and poor sleep habits – which also impact testosterone – and it’s no wonder many men are feeling sluggish and unmotivated.

It’s why four times as many men are taking TRT (testosterone replacement therapy) now compared to a decade ago. But not everyone wants to be injecting themselves if they can avoid it.

The good news? There are plenty of natural ways to keep your testosterone levels thriving. Let’s dive into it.

testosterone levels over eight weeks. Aim for 3-4 sessions a week, focusing on lifting heavy with proper form.

Get enough sleep

2

Think of sleep as your body’s recharge station. Your testosterone levels can plummet by up to 15% if you’re skimping on rest. Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night. Develop a bedtime routine, reduce screen time before bed, and keep your room dark and cool.

3

Eat a balanced diet

Nutrition plays a key role in hormone regulation. Focus on these testosterone-friendly foods:

Healthy fats: Avocados, olive oil, and nuts are excellent sources of monounsaturated fats that support testosterone production.

Lean proteins: Eggs, chicken, and fish provide amino acids for muscle growth.

Zinc and magnesium: Shellfish, seeds, and leafy greens are rich in these minerals, both of which are vital for testosterone levels.

Vitamin D: Getting enough sunlight exposure or supplementing with vitamin D can work wonders.

“A simple 15-minute walk in the sun can provide your daily dose of vitamin D, which is critical for testosterone production,” notes registered dietitian Emily Johnson.

Reduce stress levels

Chronic stress releases cortisol, a hormone that directly inhibits testosterone production. In fact, studies have shown that prolonged stress can reduce testosterone levels by as much as 20%.

Incorporate stress management techniques like yoga, meditation, or a daily walk in nature to keep cortisol in check.

Maintain a healthy weight

Carrying excess body fat, particularly around your belly, is like a testosterone killer. According

to research from the Endocrine Society, obese men are twice as likely to suffer from low testosterone. A balanced diet and regular exercise will not only help you lose weight but also restore hormone balance.

8 4 5 6 7

Stay sexually active

Here’s some fun news: maintaining a healthy sex life can give your testosterone levels a natural boost. Studies suggest that sexual activity increases testosterone, creating a beneficial cycle for both your body and mind.

Limit alcohol and avoid smoking

Alcohol and cigarettes are notorious for their testosterone-suppressing effects. Excessive alcohol can reduce testosterone by up to 23%, while smoking damages your blood vessels, further hindering testosterone production. If you enjoy a drink, do so in moderation. Red wine, which contains antioxidants, might be a slightly better choice than beer.

Supplement

While nothing beats a wellrounded diet, certain supplements can support testosterone levels.

Consider:

Ashwagandha: adaptogen known to reduce stress and increase testosterone by up to 17% in some studies.

Fenugreek: herb has shown promising results in enhancing strength and vitality.

DHEA: A precursor hormone that may support testosterone production.

Taking a natural approach to increasing testosterone doesn’t just boost your hormone levels — it enhances your overall health, vitality, and confidence. Consistency is key, so find the habits that work best for your lifestyle.

“Remember, boosting testosterone is a marathon, not a sprint,” says Dr. Smith. “Small, consistent changes add up to big results.”

\\ GET IT RIGHT AND YOU’LL BE FEELING STRONGER, SHARPER, AND MORE ENERGISED //

HEADBUTTS &HANGOVERS

TOHEALING &HOPE

Once dubbed football’s hardest man, Duncan Ferguson has lived a life of extremes – from red cards, prison time, and personal demons, to bullet headers and football folklore. Now, as he reflects on the past and embraces sobriety, self-awareness, and peace, Big Dunc shares his story with brutal honesty and disarming depth.

WORDS MATTHEW KETCHELL, FourFourTwo

No Scotsman has more Premier League goals than Duncan Ferguson’s 68 for Everton and Newcastle. Nobody has more red cards, either, though Richard Dunne and Patrick Vieira tie with Ferguson’s eight.

It’s believed by some – not least Ferguson himself – that the combative 6ft 4in forward could have broken Denis Law and Kenny Dalglish’s joint record of 30 goals for Scotland, had he not refused international selection from 1997 onwards. He did so in protest at treatment by the Scottish FA over his conviction for assault in 1995; Ferguson had headbutted Raith

Rovers’ John McStay in April 1994, which led to the 23-year-old serving a 44-day sentence in Glasgow’s notorious Barlinnie prison.

Upon his release, Ferguson returned down south to Everton – they had made his loan move from Rangers permanent by then, showing faith in the talented talisman at his lowest ebb.

He repaid them with goals, commitment, captaincy and even two spells as caretaker manager. He helped to save Everton from relegation on multiple occasions, and played his part in their last major trophy win: the 1994-95 FA Cup.

Ahead of the publication of his autobiography, Big Dunc sat down to answer some big questions. And, as with every header and tackle, he didn’t duck a single one…

\\ I NEVER GAVE MYSELF A CHANCE

THAT’S ONE OF MY BIGGEST REGRETS. A WEE BIT OF THAT WAS MY LIFESTYLE //

You made your professional debut for Dundee United at Ibrox when you were 18. Were you daunted, or did nothing intimidate you at that age?

I was fearless. I suppose we all are when we’re young. I came on as a sub and beat two or three players with my first touch. I felt great. The noise was incredible –incredible! You couldn’t talk to the player next to you. I’d never heard anything like it. I’d come from the youth team and reserves, so to go into that was tremendous – and we won! Rangers hadn’t been beaten there for two years. I made a difference, and I was made up.

\\

SOME OF MY RED CARDS WERE RIDICULOUS //

You were only 21 when you moved to Rangers for a British record transfer fee of £4 million, in 1993. Did that expectation weigh heavily on you, joining an already successful side?

Yes. It was something I couldn’t handle. I never gave myself a chance – that’s one of my biggest regrets. A wee bit of that was my lifestyle. I was getting a lot of injuries at the time. I was a young guy, I had a few quid in my pocket, and I followed Ally McCoist and Durranty [Ian Durrant] around like a wee poodle.

They were established players; I was just a kid learning the trade. You get caught up in it all. You’ve made it before you’ve really made it. You’re in the big time but, actually, I never performed on the pitch because I never had an opportunity to perform – I was never fit. It probably came a couple of years too early for me.

Do you regret what happened with John McStay in the April 1994 match against Raith Rovers?

I think it was harsh, what happened. So, regret? Yeah, I wish it hadn’t happened. There was slight contact – it wasn’t a full-blooded headbutt – and he went down, but I didn’t expect what came next. It was a big moment for me in my Rangers career and in Scotland, because it’s one of the reasons why I moved to the south. Walter Smith, God bless him, said I needed to get out of Scotland. In the end, it cost me my Scotland career. I don’t think I deserved to go to prison.

What drew you to Everton in 1994?

Clifford Finch and Peter Johnson were coming up to Ibrox to look at several players. They were keeping tabs on Ian Durrant, but my name got mentioned and it just happened, as quick as that [Clicks fingers]. I was upset. I cried my eyes out because Walter had shown a lot of faith in me, breaking the British transfer record to bring me in, and I’d failed. There were teams in London who were interested in me, but I didn’t think it was a good idea, for obvious reasons. I knew Everton played in blue, I knew there had been loads of great Scottish centre-forwards down there – Andy Gray, Alex Young, Graeme Sharp, so there was a tradition of No.9s – and I thought I’d get a game, get some minutes, so it was a brilliant move for me.

\\ I CRIED MY EYES OUT BECAUSE WALTER HAD SHOWN A LOT OF FAITH IN ME //

What’s your most cherished memory from your time at Everton? Is it the goal on your debut against Liverpool?

You always remember your first goal, but when your first one is against the enemy… and we were bottom of the league! It was Joe Royle’s first match in charge; I scored the first goal and it set us on our way. It was fantastic: a big step for me, to get the supporters on board, and we beat Liverpool. We don’t beat them very often. Another one was scoring a hattrick of headers, as captain. The great man, God bless him, Howard

Kendall, made me captain. We were fighting relegation against Bolton, a six-pointer at Goodison, and I scored three goals with headers. No one else did it in the Premier League for nearly 20 years.

But I’d put managing Everton above them all. In 2019, I was manager, we were in the relegation zone again, and we had to win. Things were getting a bit tight off the field, with the money. And we beat Chelsea at home: 3-1. That was a very special day – electric. Maybe it’s because it’s fresher in my memory, but that’s right up there, and maybe first.

A year into your time with Everton, you were jailed for 44 days as a result of the John McStay clash. How many people wrote to you in prison, and what did that support mean to you?

It was at least 10,000. Sue Palmer, the wee secretary at Everton, went through the lot and we wrote an open letter; I signed them all and we sent them to everyone who wrote to me in the nick. Obviously, you’re in there all f**king day and you’ve got plenty of time on your hands, so I went through every letter. It was unbelievable. I think everyone knew I shouldn’t have been there. I was only 23; it happened when I was 22.

Barlinnie prison had a reputation for violence. How bad was it?

There were loads of bad things in that prison. People getting slashed and cut to pieces, people hanging themselves, people putting their heads through glass windows – and I saw it all. Crazy things. People drinking shampoo to make themselves puke up drugs. It was f**king terrible. I worked in the hospital wing and people would always steal needles, drugs. People were s**tting out balloons full of drugs onto newspapers. They were swallowing the drugs, then going into the nick and s**tting it out.

SPORT

I only had about two matches or whatever to go, but they wanted me to miss the entire 12 again. When I went on international duty, the SFA were there in the dressing room – the same people who gave me the ban, trying to shake my hand. I told them to forget about it.

I regret it. I would have got to kick the first ball at the 1998 World Cup and I should have broken goal records. But it’s just words now. I never scored for my country.

How was the tension on the last day of the 1997-98 season, when Everton stayed up by drawing with Coventry?

I was sick leaving the house. Sick in the car park. I was going to be the captain of a relegated Everton. It was frightening.

How did you feel when Everton sold you to Newcastle?

My preference was to stay where I was. But

Everton needed a few quid, I was a saleable asset and Ruud Gullit had tried to get me previously, at Chelsea.

It came about quickly. Newcastle bid £7 million, with another million to come if I played 20 or 30 games; Everton were getting the £7m up front, and that was going to help the club. I was actually involved in negotiating a new contract to stay. In the end, it was explained to me and I thought, ‘Do you know what? If the board don’t f**king want me, what do you do?’

Gullit liked me. So did Glenn Hoddle when he was at Chelsea – I went to meet Glenn a couple of times.

\\ MY PREFERENCE WAS TO STAY WHERE I WAS. BUT EVERTON NEEDED A

FEW QUID //

How would you rate your time Newcastle?at

Was your turn and volley at the Leazes End against Manchester United the best goal of your career?

It’s up there. I normally headed them in. I enjoyed my time at Newcastle. Me and Alan Shearer were unstoppable.

My injury record was horrendous, and that’s upsetting. I struggled my whole career with injuries.

That goal was fantastic – probably one of the best of my career, technically. Bang! It was in the net before anyone realised. They’re the best ones, aren’t they? St James’ Park had a great atmosphere. I loved the punters and loved the club.

Our PE teacher used to tell us that the reason you were always injured at Newcastle was because he watched your warm-ups and felt you didn’t do them properly. Did he have a point?

[Laughs] Always listen to your teacher! I’m sure they’ve got a point in there somewhere, but I think it was just the way I was built. You need to say that to Alan – he hated warm-ups!

\\ THAT WAS LUDICROUS, WHAT GULLIT DID TO ALAN.

Neither you nor Alan Shearer were picked for Newcastle’s derby defeat at home to Sunderland in August 1999. Shearer has said he went into training early the next morning to have it out with Ruud Gullit, but you’d got in first and the door was off its hinges. Does that sound familiar?

Yeah, I got in early. I was upset. I was coming back from injury, Alan and Gullit were at loggerheads, and I felt that I’d got caught in the middle of it. He should have started me in that match, and obviously he should have started Alan – leaving out Alan Shearer was f**king ridiculous.

I didn’t like that I was getting dragged into an argument, so I went in early and gave it to him. He took it, to be fair. I stormed out and Alan was coming in – I think he’d been on the school run or something that morning.

That was ludicrous, what Gullit did to Alan. They wanted me to replace Alan at Newcastle – I think that was the strategy. Maybe they thought Alan was on the way out, but he scored another hundred goals for them! [Laughs] It doesn’t matter how good you are: when people try to erode your confidence and behave negatively towards you, your form can dip, and Alan was struggling. He didn’t like Gullit, and rightly so, given what happened to him. He was England captain and still a class player.

manmagazineuk.co.uk

Why did you go back to

Everton?

Because they offered – simple as that. There were other teams interested, but I loved Everton. I said to Bobby Robson, “I’m not going anywhere else unless it’s Everton.” He said they were selling me too cheap, that I was worth more, but he knew about the injuries. He was right: I was injury-prone. They smelled that and thought, ‘We’ll cut our losses and let him go for £4m’. I gave up my wage. I had three years left on my contract but went back to Everton for half the wage.

How do you feel about sharing the Premier League record for red cards? Is it a badge of honour, in a way?

A centre-forward getting the most red cards is no good, is it? I don’t see myself as that person. Some of my red cards were ridiculous. One was for singing to a referee. It was against Blackburn.I was singing, “Who’s a baldy bastard?” – just singing on the pitch, like a daft thing. [Sings, “Who’s a baldy bastard?”] Joe Parkinson was a baldy bastard in our team, but the referee was bald and he took offence to it. He was 30 yards away, but he ran up to me – red card. Tim Sherwood said, “F**king hell, ref, he was shouting at me.” Tim Sherwood looked like f**king Tarzan! [Laughs]

Have you talked to Steffen Freund since that game against Leicester, when you grabbed him around the neck after being sent off?

down on me there. Tactically, they set up well. They were blocking me and pushing me – they knew they could nudge me and had the centre-backs on me; the centre-mids on me. I probably grew frustrated and that was it – he got the brunt of it, unfortunately.

What do you remember of playing alongside a young Wayne Rooney?

You just knew right away that he had it. He was really strong, quick, aggressive – everything you expect in a top player. Everybody knew he was going to have a wonderful career, and he fulfilled that, didn’t he?

He came from a boxing family as well, off the streets. He was built like a f**king middleweight champion. He was a great player – I put him and Shearer as the best there have ever been in the Premier League.

If

you could go back and change one thing in your career, what would it be?

The drinking. That was my downfall: the booze. I was a binger. I had no excuse. My dad wasn’t a drinker – he stopped drinking at 35. I just fell into it, following everybody else. The best advice I could give any athlete is: do not drink. Keep off the booze, because I believe that led to my injuries.

I’ve not had a drink for 20 years. I didn’t have help; I simply wasn’t bothered. I did the school run, became a parent and moved to Majorca – it was easy. I’d had enough. I couldn’t take the hangovers, it was as straightforward as that. I woke up one day and said, “I’ll stop until Christmas.” Christmas came and went. New Year came and went.

I never touched another drop. I might drink again – I might get a drink when I’m 70, who knows? – but I don’t miss it. The booze dehydrated me, which led to my injuries, and I never played enough matches. If I’d played enough games, I reckon I’d have been up there with the best of them, no problem.

\\EVERYBODY KNEW HE WAS GOING TO HAVE A WONDERFUL CAREER, AND HE FULFILLED THAT, DIDN’T HE? //

No. Farcical – that was the old blue mist that came

\\ I DIDN’T WANT TO LOOK BACK AT MYSELF AS THAT PLAYER WHO WASN’T QUITE THERE, LIKE AN OLD BOXER LOSING YOUR LAST FEW FIGHTS //

Did you have any offers to carry on playing when you left Everton at 34?

Two or three. Harry Redknapp wanted to take me to Portsmouth and double my wage – I was on £12,000 a week at Everton. Wigan were just about to sign Emile Heskey, so I spoke to them, but I thought, ‘I’m not the same player; why pick up another 12 months or two years’ salary?’ I didn’t want to look back at myself as that player who wasn’t quite there, like an old boxer losing your last few fights. It’s just sad, so I went out at the top. I’m glad I did that.

Did you ever play against anyone who frightened you? Who was the hardest player you ever played against?

No, I never played against anybody who frightened me.

Hardest player I faced? I always found Sami Hyypia difficult. He wasn’t the quickest but he was as good as anybody in the air, and I’d started to lose my leap due to the injuries. I found it a wee bit tougher as I got older.

On two occasions, you confronted burglars who broke into your home and made them regret it. What are your top tips to deter them?

Don’t sleep. That’s one of the reasons I caught them, as I sleep with one eye open. Those incidents were frightening, and not a very nice experience. They’re probably more embarrassed than I am. They shouldn’t have been in my house. Unfortunately for them, they made an awful decision – possibly full of booze or something. I don’t hold it against them. It happened twice! The first time, they were trying to be smart. They knew it was my house. That’s what upset me.

I had a young baby at the time as well, and they did it at 1am. The first two lads got 15 months. The second time, the boy got four years because he was on licence. He was a druggie. He couldn’t help himself, because drugs are terrible and you can’t control yourself. A lot of people in my family have passed away because of drugs. It’s not nice.

How shook up were you after the burglaries?

My wife was more frightened than me. We had to move house. I was f**king fit as a fiddle, When you’re young, it’s just another incident and you don’t think that much. If they came through my door now, I might think, ‘F**king take my telly, who gives a f**k?!’ [Laughs]

Do you still keep pigeons?

I do. I’ve still got my pigeons in my back garden – I’m going home to feed them and water them after this. It all comes from my time on the estates when I was younger: I was brought up with animals. I had some ferrets, greyhounds, pigeons, rabbits, f**king budgies – I had the lot. I loved to go fishing as well. I love dogs.

I had a great mongrel. I picked it up off the street – it was a stray – and called it Lucky. That dog lasted 15, 20 years... it broke my dad’s heart when it went. But I love keeping pigeons. I’ve tried them everywhere; I dragged them to Majorca. They’re big wee babies and I enjoy being with them. It’s calming. They’re not like the things off the street. My pigeons are supermodels compared to them.

What’s one thing you took from your time working as assistant manager to Carlo Ancelotti at Everton?

He’s tactically spot on, as all of the top managers are. I think it was probably just his calmness. It’s clear thinking: he sees something and delivers it clearly at half-time. He’s seen it all before, and he’s got respect. His players love him.

Back in 2021, you recorded a video message on the pitch at Goodison which went viral, for a boy who had been slacking in his photography lessons. How did that happen? Did you take him for lunch as you promised?

What does Everton mean to you?

If I promise something, I do it, so of course I took him for lunch. Somebody sent me something, as Everton fans do, saying, “Do you mind recording a video for this pupil of mine?” I wasn’t aware that anybody was even going to see the video, but it looked good. It wasn’t edited – I just nailed it. I don’t know a lot about the internet. He had to keep up his end of the bargain and get stuck in, and he did. I took him to a Greek restaurant up in Wavertree. It was nice.

\\ IF I’D PLAYED ENOUGH GAMES, I’D HAVE BEEN UP THERE

Besides my family, it’s the main thing for me – I’ve got so much connection with the fans. It runs deep. I’ve been through a lot with them, and they wrote to me in prison and things like that. I’m still in the city. All of my mates are still here – the ones that are above the ground. Some others are behind a cell door. I’ve just been close to the city, close to fans on the street, and I reckon that’s why they took to me.

How will you feel when Everton move into the new stadium this year?

I’m sad about that. I love Goodison. I’ve not been in that new stadium yet. I’ll go at the start of next season. It won’t be the same, but it’ll be good for revenue. You’d think it would push Everton into the top eight teams in the league.

The three teams that come up are always going to go down – the points tally they accumulate now is shocking. Back in our day, you needed 40 points to stay up. Now, 30 points keeps you up, so you don’t actually have to invest that much to stay in the division. But if you want to break into the top four, you have to spend. I think Everton will comfortably be in the top half of the table forever.

Will you grab a souvenir of Goodison?

I wish I’d been more sentimental when I was younger. I’d have been swapping all of my shirts. I used to think that was a little snide, but wouldn’t it have been lovely to swap shirts with some of those amazing players? I never did that. I’ve got a few – Shearer, Rooney... it’s a nice thing to look back on and give to your children. Our generation didn’t f**king think about

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that. Perhaps stripping the stadium isn’t a bad idea. I’m sure the Scousers will be – I might take a spade and dig up a penalty spot or something!

What was Dale Vince like to work with when you took charge of Forest Green Rovers? You left after only six months, a few weeks after relegation...

I like Dale. Good guy. I did buy into the green thing. There is global warming. I don’t like what that lot do, throwing orange paint about and f**king glueing themselves here and there, but Dale’s got a message and I think it’s important. The planet is heating up. I don’t know the ins and outs of it all. The polar bears would tell you more than I could.

us and poured the poison in the ear, and it’s very difficult for owners not to listen. We could’ve built a great thing there. I took a massive gamble going to Forest Green: I’d managed in the Premier League, I’d coached at the top... I didn’t even know where Forest Green was. They were about five points adrift when I arrived in late January and they’d played three or four extra matches, so relegation was inevitable, but they didn’t want to hear those words. I thought I was getting a rebuild. I put my career in his hands. He should have protected me better than he did, but it was me who started the ball rolling because I didn’t agree with him bringing in a sporting director.

As manager, I think he should’ve stuck with me. People got between

\\ I PUT MY CAREER IN HIS HANDS //

What are your plans now, having left your managerial post at Inverness Caledonian Thistle in October?

I’m doing quite a bit of media work. I’ll promote my book. I’ll interview for jobs. I keep believing people will realise I’m a serious coach and not trying to be the hardest man to have ever walked this planet. I’m not a scary man. I think it’s tough for a lot of sporting directors to hire me because they’re younger than me, and that intimidates people. I have a massive CV – I’ve worked with the best in the world – and I’m hoping a sporting director will see that I’m not this big, aggressive mad man some people make me out to be, even if I was as a player.

I took a lot from Walter Smith, Howard Kendall, Carlo Ancelotti – all quiet men. I believe I’m a big, quiet man.

‘Big Dunc: The Upfront Autobiography’, written with Henry Winter, is available now in hardback, eBook and audiobook

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\\ MY ANXIETY DOES SPIKE IF I DO HAVE A BAD GAME OF FOOTBALL. IF I HAVE A BAD GAME, I WOULD TALK TO MY TEAMMATES AND MY MANAGER, SEE WHAT THEY’VE GOT TO SAY, BECAUSE IT COULD JUST BE ME OVERTHINKING ABOUT SOMETHING THAT MAYBE ISN’T THAT BAD. //

ENGLAND PARTIALLY-SIGHTED MEN’S

\\ QUITE COMMONLY I GET BUTTERFLIES BEFORE PLAYING A GAME, OR I OVERTHINK MISTAKES THAT I’VE MADE IN A [PREVIOUS] GAME. THE ONLY WAY I’VE REALLY GOT OVER IT IS ADMITTING TO MYSELF THOSE MISTAKES I’VE MADE OR BEING AWARE OF THE BUTTERFLIES IN MY STOMACH BEFORE A MATCH, AND REALLY JUST TRYING TO EMBRACE IT AND SAY, ‘THE ONLY REASON I’M GETTING THAT ANXIETY IS BECAUSE I CARE AND I WANT TO DO WELL – I WANT TO PERFORM WELL.’. //

JUDE BELLINGHAM LUCY BRONZE

\\ I THINK IT’S IMPORTANT TO FIND THE THINGS THAT WORK FOR YOU. THE MORE YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THOSE SITUATIONS THE MORE YOU CAN EXPERIMENT WITH THINGS. I USE MUSIC AND TALKING TO PEOPLE. I’VE GOT INTO A BIT OF MEDITATION AND IT HELPS ME GET INTO A ZONE WHERE I DON’T REALLY FEEL LIKE I CAN BE DISTRACTED OR PUT OFF. //

\\ I REMEMBER HAVING ANXIETY AT SCHOOL, BECAUSE I STRUGGLED WITH DYSLEXIA. I MOVED ABROAD WHEN I WAS 17 TO LIVE IN AMERICA. THE WAY I DEALT WITH THAT WAS MY MUM. MY MUM WAS SOMEONE I CAN OPEN UP TO AND TALK TO. YOU DON’T NECESSARILY HAVE TO TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU’RE ANXIOUS ABOUT, BUT JUST LETTING CONVERSATION COME OUT AND YOUR VOICE BE HEARD REALLY HELPS. //

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BIG LEAGUES

BOX ROOM BRANDON ROBINSONTHOMPSON FROM THE TO THE

Once broke, jobless, and sleeping in his mum’s box room, Brandon Robinson-Thompson is now one of golf’s fastest-rising stars. He opens up about the grind, the gratitude, and the wild journey from near rock bottom to shooting course records on the DP World Tour.

WORDS MICHAEL CATLING, Todays Golfer

Brandon RobinsonThompson is living the dream. He’s one of the hottest golfers on the planet right now. He’s breaking course records on the DP World Tour and has already earned over €400,000 in prize money from just 12 tournaments this season. He’s climbing the world rankings quicker than a squirrel up a freshly filled bird feeder.

But, rewind just two and a half years, and his life looked very different.

He was 27, living back home with his mum, claiming Universal Credit, with less than £500 to his name. He was battling mental health struggles, fighting to keep a long-distance relationship alive, and wondering if the dream of professional golf was already behind him.

Here he shares how it turned it all around…

\\ I LITERALLY WENT FROM HAVING NO MONEY TO FEELING LIKE I’D MADE IT //

My mental state was pretty dark during the pandemic. My visa in the United States got revoked, so I had to move back home to England. I left my girlfriend in the States and my plan was to go home, get a new visa, and come back in three months. But then Covid played out and a couple of months turned into 10 months. I ended up moving back in with my mum in this small little box room in the Isle of Wight. I think she loved having me there, but I felt like my career and life had been put on pause.

I went at least a year without playing. Although government guidelines did suggest that athletes could

practice and prepare for events, our local clubs weren’t allowing it. I did some roofing for a bit and I claimed Universal Credit for a couple of months, just so I had some money coming in. I don’t like labelling how I felt as ‘depressed’, but I felt like I was suffocating because I had all these dreams and aspirations that I couldn’t progress at the time. I just couldn’t see a way out for a good year or so.

Covid was a reset button for me. It’s not like I wasn’t trying before, but there was so much thinking time that it made me realise, ‘I’ve got to make something happen here.’ Luckily, I got my EuroPro Tour card at Qualifying School and I think I played every event that season in 2021. It was a weird situation because I was

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entering the events, but they couldn’t put me on the tee sheet because I hadn’t paid the entry fees. I somehow managed to get around it by playing well and earning enough money to pay for my next start. I was making 700/800 quid, and then the entry fee was £300. I was staying in a couple of hotels, so it was just enough to get by. It was fun to be back playing and people were in similar positions, so we were kind of on that journey together.

The financial side has never been easy for me. I don’t think it is for a lot of professional golfers, especially those who aren’t world beaters. I never had the backing to play professionally, and actually got very lucky that one of my home courses in South Carolina raised around $25,000 for me one year.

That essentially got me my first car at the age of 26, just so I could drive around and play events.

There were a couple of occasions when I got down to less than $1,000 in my account. But then I won a tournament which kept me afloat. That probably happened three or four times where I’ve got myself into a hole and somehow found my way out. It certainly moulded me into the man I am today. I wouldn’t be the same person if I had it easy.

The big turning point for me was the Qatar World Cup. My friend was living out there and I watched a bunch of games. I went back after Christmas for like two months and I remember saying to my buddy, ‘I don’t know where I’m going to play this year but when an opportunity arises, I’m going to be ready’. I then got chatting to the guy who was running the MENA Tour and even though I wasn’t a member, he invited me to play a couple of events in Egypt.

\\ I FELT LIKE I WAS SUFFOCATING. I HAD ALL THESE DREAMS AND NO WAY TO CHASE THEM //

I flew straight from Qatar and finished 11th in my first event, then won the second. In that moment, it felt like so much pressure had been lifted. Straight away, I signed up for eight events on the Clutch Tour, won three of them, and topped their mid-season Order of Merit. So, in the space of five months, I went from playing on the MENA Tour with no money to qualifying for the 2023 Open Championship and earning a second start on the DP World Tour. Fast forward a few weeks, I made the cut at Royal Liverpool and then won my first Challenge Tour event on my next start.

For so long I had been worrying about being able to fund my career.

of a sudden I won 15 grand on the MENA Tour, 40 grand on the Clutch Pro Tour, 40 grand at The Open, and another 40 grand from that Challenge Tour event. I remember almost laughing and thinking, ‘How has this happened? I literally went from having no money at the start of the year to then feeling like I’ve made it.

I feel like I belong out here on Tour now.

a strange dynamic when you first get your card because you’re just another guy until you start playing

\\

I KNOW I CAN FINISH IN THE TOP 10 AND GET MY PGA TOUR CARD //

well. Then, all of a sudden, people start saying hello and acknowledging you. These are the little things that don’t get spoken about, but you do notice. I’ve been going out for dinner a lot with Ross Fisher at events and I remember watching him in Ryder Cups. So that’s a little surreal, building friendships with people I used to watch on TV.

Today, I walked out of the players’ lounge and onto the range and I was just filled with gratitude. It was sunny and I’m at this incredible property, playing this insane golf course. I’m in my rookie season on the DP World Tour, have already got a bunch of top 10s, and have shot two course records now. I find it hard to believe that there is anyone more grateful than I am to be out here, living out my dream.

I am so focused right now on my performance and achieving my goals. A byproduct of that is that I’m going to be financially secure, which I want for myself, my wife, and our future family. One of the most fulfilling things I did was buying my sister her first car. Internally, it’s quite nice that I can do that and give her a helping hand.

I would love to play on the DP World Tour for a few seasons, but I know I can finish in the top 10 on the Race to Dubai and get my

My wife is from the States and I’ve lived there for eight years, so it’s a second home for me anyway. There are so many amazing events I’ve watched on TV, and I’d love to get the opportunity to play in them.

I’m already looking forward to playing the BMW PGA Championship at Wentworth because that was the first golf event I ever attended.

\\ I WOULDN’T BE THE SAME PERSON IF I HAD IT EASY //

My wife has just joined me on the road and is going to be with me for the whole of the summer. Our dream has always been to travel the world and visit all these amazing places and venues. Often what happens is that you don’t get to share these experiences with anybody when you’re competing on tour, but now we’re in a position where we can be together and share these nice experiences. Sadly, she hung up her caddie bib last year. When I won the Irish Challenge in 2023, she was on my bag that week and she was carrying again during the Challenge Tour Grand Final, when I won my card. So, our thinking is that she caddied for my first Challenge Tour event and hopefully my last.

I’ve said that I want to win twice on Tour this season. I know I can win, but I want to do it over and over again and make my grandad proud. I want him to see me do it because he’s always believed in me. It’s funny because he always used to tell me I was going to do this, that, and the other. Whenever we speak on the phone, he always brings it up and says, ‘I told you’. I used to think it was crazy when he made all these wild predictions, but now it doesn’t seem so wild. He’s one of the main reasons why I’m doing what I’m doing. I can’t wait for the day when I can call him up and tell him, ‘Today I did it, I won on the DP World Tour.’ He’ll be over the moon.

Get more great golf content at todays-golfer.com

AND YOUR MIND

“ I’ve always trusted Wellman - my wellbeing is a top priority.”

POWER SHOWERS

Cold showers are said to boost recovery, energy, and resilience. But do they live up to the hype, or are they just another wellness fad? We take a closer look at the science behind the chill.

Afew years ago, a cold shower would have been an unfortunate annoyance and reason to immediately call a plumber. But today they’re all the rage, with half the world turning the dial towards cold water.

Proponents claim that cold showers – or other cold-water exposure – can improve mood, boost resilience, and even sharpen mental clarity. But is there any real science behind the hype, or are shivery showers a waste of time?

THE SCIENCE OF COLD EXPOSURE

Cold exposure triggers a powerful physiological response. When your body is suddenly hit with freezing water, it activates the sympathetic nervous system – our fightor-flight response. This leads to a surge of norepinephrine, a neurotransmitter and hormone linked to improved mood, focus, and alertness.

“Cold exposure increases norepinephrine levels by two to threefold,” says Dr. Rhonda Patrick, a leading researcher in health and longevity. “This can have profound effects on mood, attention, and even pain tolerance.”

PUTTING DEPRESSION ON ICE

Studies have shown that regular cold showers can help reduce symptoms of depression. A 2008 study published in Medical Hypotheses found that exposure to cold water stimulates the production of endorphins, the body’s natural painkillers, which can create a lasting mood-boosting effect. A 2014 study in PLoS ONE, the Public Library of Science journal, found that cold exposure increases dopamine levels by up to 250%. Dopamine is a neurotransmitter associated with motivation and pleasure.

\\ IT’LL SAVE YOU A LITTLE BIT ON YOUR ENERGY BILLS TOO, SO WHAT’S NOT TO LIKE? //

BE A BETTER YOU

WHAT AN ICE MAN

Dutch extreme athlete

Wim Hof, known as ‘The Iceman’, gained fame for his ability to withstand extreme cold temperatures, including swimming under ice and running marathons in the Arctic Circle in minimal clothing. He’s widely credited with popularizing cold water immersion and the associated practices of the Wim Hof Method, which combines breathing techniques and cold exposure. “The cold is merciless but fair,” he says. “It teaches you to be comfortable with the uncomfortable and strengthens your mind and body.”

\\ THE COLD IS MERCILESS BUT FAIR //

MENTAL TOUGHNESS AND RESILIENCE

Beyond the physiological benefits, cold showers serve as a mental training ground for resilience. Voluntarily stepping into discomfort teaches you how to control your response to stress. The more you expose yourself to controlled discomfort, the better you become at handling unexpected stressors in everyday life.

A study from the European Journal of Applied Physiology found that regular exposure to cold water can lower cortisol levels, the hormone associated with stress. Lower cortisol means better emotional regulation and resilience in high-pressure situations.

Elite athletes, military personnel, and high performers often use cold exposure as a tool for mental fortitude. Former Navy SEAL and best-selling author David Goggins states, “The most important conversations you’ll ever have are the ones you’ll have with yourself. Facing discomfort, like cold showers, is a daily reminder that you are in control.”

HOW TO GET STARTED

If you’re new to cold showers, the idea of plunging straight into freezing water might be overwhelming – and doing too much cold exposure too soon can be dangerous. Instead, ease into it:

Start with contrast showers: Begin with warm water, then switch to cold for 30 seconds before returning to warmth. Gradually increase the cold exposure over time.

Breathe through it: Deep, controlled breathing can help you manage the initial shock and reduce the urge to panic.

Focus on the benefits: Remind yourself that the discomfort is temporary and that you’re actively strengthening your mind and body.

Make it a habit: Aim for at least 30 days of consistent cold showers to truly experience the benefits.

THE VERDICT: DO COLD SHOWERS REALLY WORK?

Cold showers are not a magic bullet, but they offer compelling benefits for mood, resilience, and mental clarity. The physiological response to cold exposure – boosting neurotransmitters like norepinephrine and dopamine – suggests real, science-backed advantages. And perhaps even more importantly, the practice of embracing discomfort can cultivate a tougher, more resilient mindset.

Dr. Susanna Søberg, a researcher in thermal medicine, explains, “Regular cold exposure can improve circulation, lower inflammation, and enhance stress tolerance – making it a simple yet effective tool for overall well-being.”

THE MEASURE

OF A MAN

Too fat, too thin, too soft, not enough – most men have felt at odds with their body at some point. Author Adam Farrer shares his experience with body shame and how he learned to create a body that works for him –one step and skipped biscuit at a time.

As a child, I didn’t worry about my body at all and, god, I miss those days. The reason I never worried was in part because I was never exceptionally anything. Not too short or too tall, never too skinny or too chubby. I was just the shape of a kid. I wasn’t sporty, but I burned a lot of calories cycling between friend’s houses and from climbing trees, falling from them, and then climbing them all over again. I could eat whatever I wanted without it altering my body too much.

Puppy fat

When my age hit double digits and I did start to pack on a little additional weight, I regarded it not with sadness but with a sense of wonder. My belly a new squidgable toy for me to play with. My friend Zoe and I would sit on the edge of the pool at our local swimming baths and lean forward, scrunching our stomachs, each of us competing to produce the greatest number of fat rolls from our midsections.

“I got… four,” she’d say. “I think… I’ve got… five,” I’d grunt, hunching over in my desperate effort to win.

BE A BETTER YOU

I could confidently do this because, as I child, no one expected me to look muscular or impressive. This was due to the fact that no one else my age looked that way either. But for a few exceptions, you could have produced recognisable versions of my friends and I using a boyshaped cookie cutter. While we spent our days watching Schwarzenegger movies and playing with action figures so inflated with muscle mass that they looked in real danger of a steroid-related coronary, none of us kids were expected to look that way.

Growing pains

Then, sometime in high school, all that changed. It seemed that I arrived for class one morning to find myself sitting alongside adults. In the same way that, in the blink of

an eye, young chimpanzees go from adorably harmless to being capable of easily yanking your arm from its socket, I found myself changing for PE and preparing to play rounders against boys who, seemingly overnight, had aged five years.

\\ I TREATED OUR BISCUIT TIN THE WAY A HEAVY DRINKER MIGHT TREAT A BOTTLE OF

WHISKEY //

They suddenly had recognisable abs, triceps, and pecs. Muscles so

clearly defined and solid looking I expected their thighs to creak like a wetsuit when they bent to tie their trainers. They’d not achieved these bodies at a gym or via extreme athletic training but apparently through absently kicking a football on the way to school while smoking the individual cigarettes that could be purchased, no questions asked, from our corner shop.

A shower of shame

More likely, though, these changes had been the results of sudden, rampaging puberty. A high velocity hormonal rush that very much separated the men from the boys. I found myself dropped without warning into a world where my once fun body, pudgy, boyish and undefined, was no longer

BE A BETTER YOU

acceptable. Something I really reckoned with after an experience in the school showers.

“Get in!” my PE teacher had said to me, pointing toward the shower block in our school’s changing room. “Everyone has to have one.”

I stood there at the entrance of the block, my towel wrapped around my waist, trying to build up the courage to remove it and step inside. As I did, boys who now looked as if they were old enough to qualify for mortgages confidently strode past me and disappeared into a cloud of steam. When they emerged, their skin flushed pink by the water, they grabbed their towels and scrubbed themselves dry, chatting easily with their equally massive friends. Seemingly confident and certain of themselves. My teacher shot me a withering look, despairing at the last

unwashed kid in his care.

“See,” he said, “They can do it. Get in. Now!” I dropped my towel obediently then darted into the block. My plan, one that I know other less confident boys had used, involved simply running from one end of the block to the other. Those of us who chose this method would not emerge clean, but we would at least be wet from the spray of the shower heads, and it got the whole dreadful thing out of the way in a few seconds.

But because I had waited so long for my turn, I wasn’t just running across wet tiles, but ones heavily slicked with soap. I managed to stride past the first shower head before I fell with a hard slapping sound, my momentum sending me awkwardly skidding on my back across the coffee-colour tiles, only stopping when my body collided

with the end of the block. I spent a couple of seconds laying there on my back, this shocked, upturned, pre-pubescent beetle, before coming to my senses and scrambling out into the changing rooms and the safety of my towel.

But it was no longer where I had left it. Instead, it was in the hand of Kevin, a much larger boy who smirked, enjoying the power he had over me while I stood there, naked, damp and desperate.

“Come on,” I pleaded. “Don’t muck about. Give me it.”

“Say ‘please’,” Kevin said.

“Please,” I said, the word leaving me as a pitiful groan.

“Say ‘pretty please’.”

“Come on, now,” our teacher said, finally intervening. Seeming to feel that my humiliation had lasted long enough. “Give it back to him.”

BE A BETTER YOU

“Okay,” Kevin said casually, and tossed the towel towards me but way over my head, where it landed on top of the lockers. I scrambled after it, hopping in my effort to reach it, one hand covering my modesty and the other flailing for the towel, the softer parts of my sore, pink, underwhelming physique jiggling with every hop. On display for everyone around me. Mocking laughter reverberated off both the tiles and the cold, wet embarrassment of my body.

A fork in the road (and mouth)

This could have been my origin story. If I had been a different kind of kid, I would have gone home that night seething with determination. Grabbed a note pad and started making a plan to build up my body and become a confident, unbullyable force. And the option had been there. My older brother, Robert, had exercise equipment in his room. A bull bar, a chest expander, a set of plastic dumbbells, the weight of which could be adjusted by filling them with water.

My problem, though, was that I was lazy. Cycling and tree-climbing were things of the past by the time I reached high school, and my body demonstrated this perfectly, no longer benefitting from an effort-free calorie burn.

sport were not compatible. In my school report, he’d written ‘Adam does not like PE, and he is not good at it’. Traditionally, PE teachers brutalise the weak and physically calamitous kids in their charge but mine had no appetite for brutality, much more interested in an easy life. So, rather than persist with a lost cause, he decided to give me a way out.

“There’s no point with you,” he told me after class one morning. “But if you just help get the equipment out at the start of lessons and put it away afterwards, you can do whatever you like.”

\\ I TRIED TO FIND THE IDEA OF NOT EATING A DOUGHNUT

DELICIOUS //

So, instead of hitting the weights, I sat down in front of the TV to watch pro wrestling and smother my misery with snacks. Washing down a KitKat and a bag of Wotsits with a can of full fat Coke while The Ultimate Warrior lifted Ravishing Rick Rude above his head then sent him crashing face first onto the canvas. I thought of how wonderful it would feel to have strength and a physique like that, then I got off my sofa and went to grab another KitKat.

An easy way out

Ironically, the laziness and lack of physical gifts that caused me so many problems would ultimately come to my aid. Long before the scene in the shower block, my PE teacher had started to suspect that me and

I was overjoyed. No more sport. No more showers. No need to parade my pitiful body in front of my peers. In classes, my role would be to drag the cricket equipment or the nets or footballs out onto the playing fields then settle down and read novels while the other boys thrashed around in the mud or kicked each other’s shins as they raced to score goals, my own goal already achieved. I thought I had beaten the system; I would never have to take part in PE again for as long as I lived. And when puberty finally took hold of me, stretching me to 5ft 11in and making my body skinny, I felt justified in having done nothing to achieve it. See, I thought, I knew I was right.

Heavy going

Fast forward twenty years and I was in bad shape. The effortlessly slim version of me a long distant memory. In the latter half of my thirties, I weighed nineteen stone and was hurtling towards twenty with no end in sight. My shirt buttons yawned. Then screamed. I started buying my shirts in XXL size until those buttons screamed too.

Depressed about the sight of my body when I looked in the mirror, I comfort ate. Returning from work each day, I’d throw myself onto the sofa with a pack of chocolate digestives, posting them into my mouth and swallowing them in single bites. I treated our biscuit tin the way a heavy drinker might treat a bottle of whiskey.

\\ I DON’T NEED TO BE RIPPED. I JUST NEED TO STAY OUT OF HOSPITAL //

During this period, relatives raised concerns that they could hear my breathing from the other side of the house and worried that I was going to have a heart attack.

When I fell ill during a family BBQ and was advised to go to A&E, a concerned nurse hooked me up to a heart monitor “just to make sure”. This terrified me. My grandfather died of his third heart attack, the end result of a lifelong romance with idleness and jumbo cooked breakfasts. My father’s sweet tooth saw him fall foul of diabetes during middle age then followed this up with a heart disorder that required the urgent fitting of a stent.

Now here I was, receiving looks of concern from medical professionals because I couldn’t

resist nipping into Gregg’s to inhale a two-pack of Yum-Yums on the regular. My clock ticking. Sitting in front of the TV one evening, an Oreo in my mouth and another in my hand ready to go, I learned that The Ultimate Warrior had died of a heart attack. This felt like a sign and a warning. I needed to do something drastic before I ended up as a statistic.

Doughnut denial

Exercise was not my first thought. Instead, I opted as always for what seemed like the easiest route. I would cut out the sugary, fat-drenched foods that were causing me so many problems. My hope was that I’d be able to transfer the comfort I got from eating into denial. I would try to find pleasure in rejecting junk food.

When colleagues would bring doughnuts into the office, I’d use a calorie counting app to scan the barcode on the pack, receiving a full breakdown of their nutritional value and an indication of how many steps I’d need to take in order to burn it off. I tried to find the idea of not eating a doughnut delicious, focusing on that fact in denying myself I’d avoided consuming 8g of fat and 16g of refined sugars. The childhood version of me screamed at the adult version, explaining that I could have that doughnut if I just cycled for a while and fell out of a few trees a few times a week.

Rubbish runs

Eventually, this dawned on me too, and I decided it was time for me and PE to try again. Not knowing where to start, I began following a military fitness programme that I found in a pullout supplement of my Sunday newspaper. The programme involved setting myself a base level of reps for sit-ups and press-ups along with a short run, then committing to this four times a week. Each week I had to double the numbers I’d achieved the previous week.

In week one, I grunted through four press-ups, the following week I was up to eight, then sixteen. It seemed kind of pathetic, but it was progress.

I chose to run at 5am, attempting to limit the number of witnesses to my laboured running and heavy breathing while I transformed myself into the kind of person who ran sub four-hour marathons.

I pounded along the pavement through my town, not feeling fitter or shrinking my body mass significantly but increasingly noticing the amount of litter I’d pass along the way. I began bringing a carrier bag with me on my route, stopping to pick up crisp packets and cans. After a while, my running had become light jogging while holding a bin bag.

My natural inclination to avoid exercise had me looking for noble excuses to undermine it. My pressup and sit-up reps slipped back to single digits, and I decided military fitness wasn’t working for me.

I signed up for Couch to 5K then quickly bored of that, choosing instead to try a programme of kettle bell squats that I could do while watching TV.

When this didn’t alter my body fast enough, I committed myself to a form of dynamic resistance yoga designed by a former pro wrestler named Diamond Dallas Page, which required me to complete a series of wrestling inspired stretches and poses three times a week, ending each sequence with a yell of “BANG!” or “HULK IT UP!” It felt absurd, but I was burning calories, defining my muscles and losing weight, so I decided to do it every day and speed up my progress.

Two weeks into this daily regime I was back to A&E, this time with a severely strained intercostal muscle and an understanding of my limits.

One step at a time

After this, a sensible friend reminded me of the proverb ‘slow and steady wins the race’, which I knew was right, even though it was the last thing I wanted to hear. But I listened to her advice and began walking around my local park three times a day. By the end of that first month, the number I’d

BE A BETTER YOU

\\ I POUNDED THE PAVEMENT AT 5AM, HOPING NO ONE WOULD SEE ME //

see when I stepped on my scales stopped being alarming and the button holes on my shirts started to look calm again.

It was frustrating for me, the discovery that there is no easy answer and no quick solution. To control my weight, regulate my health and get myself to a point where I am confident enough to remove my shirt in front of other people, takes annoyingly small and regular steps. Many of them literal.

Sometimes I let this slip, go back to my old ways and feel myself heading back in the wrong direction. I’m in the middle of one of those slips now, on a tour promoting a book called ‘Broken Biscuits’, which has almost guaranteed that I will be handed a plate of cookies everywhere I go. So, I tuck in, because it would be rude not to.

This morning, my phone presented me with a photo memory from last year and I was startled by what I saw. Back then, I had something approaching cheekbones but looking at my face in the mirror now, I’m beginning to look as if I’m storing food in my cheeks for later.

So, I’m beginning again. Cutting back the snacks, extending my walks and considering also reopening my Couch to 5K app with a ‘long time, no see’ apology. But importantly, I do now know who I am and what works for me. I am, by nature, an idle man with exercise commitment issues and a deadly fondness for snacks.

So, I ignored the physiques I admired in my youth, not setting myself a commitment to the body beautiful. The body acceptable is good enough for me. I don’t need to be ripped, I don’t even need a dad bod, but I do have to stay out of hospital and every step, every occasionally rejected biscuit, takes me further away from that.

Adam Farrer’s new book Broken Biscuits: And Other Male Failures is out now (HarperNorth, £16.99).

DIGITAL DETOX

HOW UNPLUGGING FOR 24 HOURS CAN REWIRE YOUR BRAIN

When was the last time you went 24 hours without looking at your phone? Logging off for a whole day might sound impossible, but it could be just what your mind needs. Discover how a 24-hour digital detox can reset your brain and boost well-being.

In today’s hyper-connected world, it’s nearly impossible to escape the constant buzz of notifications, the pull of social media, and the never-ending flood of emails. Our devices, while powerful tools, are often the very things that keep us tethered to stress, anxiety, and mental overload. But what if disconnecting for just 24 hours could completely reboot your brain and refresh your outlook on life?

\\ UNPLUGGING FOR A FULL DAY MIGHT SOUND DAUNTING AT FIRST //

The concept of a “digital detox” is becoming more popular, especially as people realise the toll constant connectivity takes on our mental and emotional well-being. Unplugging for a full day might sound daunting at first — especially for those of us who are glued to our screens for work, entertainment, or socializing.

But the benefits, as research and personal stories show, are well worth the effort.

WHY WE NEED A DIGITAL DETOX

Our brains were not designed to handle the constant stream of information that we experience today. Every ping, tweet, or like sends a tiny burst of dopamine to the brain, rewarding us and reinforcing our attachment to our devices.

Over time, this can lead to a form of addiction — our brains start to crave that constant hit of information and validation. This is why, when we go too long without checking our phones or computers, we start to feel anxious or uneasy.

“Our brains are wired to seek reward and pleasure, and social media taps into this,” says Dr. Genevieve Hayes, a neuropsychologist specializing in digital addiction. “Every notification, like, or share feels like a small victory. However, the constant stimulation overloads the brain’s reward system, leading to increased stress and anxiety.”

A digital detox interrupts this cycle, giving the brain a much-needed break from overstimulation. When we disconnect, our brains can reset, recharging our cognitive functions and reducing stress. Studies have shown that even short breaks from digital devices can enhance our focus, creativity, and overall mental clarity.

THE BENEFITS OF UNPLUGGING FOR JUST 24 HOURS

1ENHANCED FOCUS AND PRODUCTIVITY

One of the immediate benefits of taking a break from digital distractions is improved concentration. Without the constant pull of notifications, we can focus better on tasks and experience fewer interruptions. Whether you’re working on a creative project, solving a problem, or simply trying to get through a to-do list, unplugging helps you hone in on the task at hand, ultimately boosting productivity.

“When we take a break from digital devices, we allow our brain to enter a state of deep focus, where we’re less likely to jump between tasks,” explains Dr. Hayes. “It’s much easier to be productive when your mind is free from the constant barrage of information.”

BE A BETTER YOU

\\ WHEN WE TAKE

A BREAK FROM DIGITAL DEVICES, WE ALLOW OUR BRAIN TO ENTER A STATE OF DEEP FOCUS //

2

REDUCED STRESS AND ANXIETY

Digital overload is directly linked to higher levels of stress and anxiety. Constantly being “on” creates a sense of urgency and an inability to switch off. In fact, a 2019 study published in the Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology found that limiting social media use to 30 minutes a day significantly reduced feelings of loneliness and depression. Disconnecting for a full 24 hours allows you to step away from the noise and focus on your own well-being.

A study led by Dr. Jean Twenge, a psychologist at San Diego State University, revealed that excessive screen time, particularly on social media, leads to higher levels of anxiety and depression in young adults. Her research indicates that reducing screen time can alleviate these symptoms and help individuals feel more connected to their real-world surroundings.

IMPROVED SLEEP

The blue light emitted by our screens is notorious for disrupting sleep patterns. Exposure to digital screens before bed interferes with melatonin production, making it harder to fall asleep. When you take a 24-hour break from screens, your body naturally reverts to its regular circadian rhythm, allowing you to enjoy deeper, more restorative sleep.

“The blue light from screens mimics daylight, tricking your body into thinking it’s daytime and delaying your natural sleep cycle,” says Dr. Charles Czeisler, a leading sleep researcher at Harvard Medical School. “Disconnecting from devices before bed helps your body prepare for sleep in a way that promotes better quality rest.”

3 4

INCREASED MINDFULNESS

A day without digital distractions can also heighten your awareness of the present moment. Without the lure of scrolling through your phone or checking your email every few minutes, you may notice things you’ve been overlooking: the sound of birds outside your window, the taste of your food, or the feel of the wind on your skin. This heightened sense of mindfulness can leave you feeling more connected to yourself and the world around you.

“Mindfulness and digital detoxes go handin-hand,” explains Dr. Claire Smith, a clinical psychologist specializing in mindfulness techniques. “When we aren’t distracted by digital devices, we become more aware of the sensory experience in front of us, which leads to a sense of peace and presence.”

BE A BETTER YOU

MORE MEANINGFUL CONNECTIONS

It’s easy to think we’re staying connected when we’re chatting on social media or texting friends, but these interactions often lack depth. And letting phones interrupt time spent with friends and family robs us of the benefit of realworld connections.

Spending 24 hours without digital distractions means you’re more likely to engage in face-to-face conversations, have more meaningful interactions, and strengthen relationships that might have been overshadowed by virtual noise.

“We are increasingly substituting online communication for face-toface interaction, but true human connection often requires the richness of in-person communication,” says Dr. David Greenfield, founder of the Center for Internet and Technology Addiction. “Taking a break from digital devices can help us rekindle that lost sense of connection.”

like social media or email? Be clear about your goals so you can stick to them.

If you rely on your phone for work or personal communication, let your friends, family, and colleagues know that you’ll be unavailable for a day. This helps manage expectations and reduces the pressure of staying connected.

LOGGING OUT

For many, the first experience of going 24 hours without their devices is eye-opening.

HOW TO DO A DIGITAL DETOX

If you’re considering a 24-hour digital detox, it’s important to set yourself up for success. Here are a few tips:

Decide what “unplugging” means for you. Will you cut off all digital devices, or will you simply limit certain activities

Having offline alternatives planned for the day can make the detox more enjoyable. Try reading a book, going for a walk, journaling, or even cooking a new recipe. Keeping busy without screens can help you avoid the temptation to check your phone.

4.

GRADUALLY REDUCE SCREEN TIME

If a full 24-hour detox feels too intimidating, start by reducing your screen time in increments. Go a few hours without checking social media, or spend a few hours in nature, leaving your phone at home. Gradual steps can help you ease into the idea of disconnecting.

5.

Going without your phone or computer for an entire day can feel challenging, especially if you’re used to constant connectivity. Don’t be hard on yourself if you slip up. The goal is to create a balance, not to punish yourself.

“The first couple of hours were tough. I kept reaching for my phone without thinking, but after a while, I began to feel calmer. I spent more time reading and took a walk in the park. By the end of the day, I felt more energised than I had in weeks.”

Emma, graphic designer, London

“I wasn’t sure I could disconnect for 24 hours, especially because I rely on my phone for work. But after doing it, I realised how much time I was wasting on emails and checking my notifications. I felt more productive and less stressed.”

2. INFORM OTHERS

3. PLAN OFFLINE ACTIVITIES

1. SET CLEAR BOUNDARIES

BE KIND TO YOURSELF

BEAT

BURNOUT

When stress takes over your life, it’s time to take it seriously. Here’s how to spot burnout – and start bouncing back.

ur jobs do a lot more than

routines, our friendships, ourselves. So when work goes wrong – or becomes too much – it doesn’t just stay in the office. It follows us home, messes with our heads,

TALKING TO A MATE, PARTNER OR FAMILY MEMBER CAN BE A MASSIVE RELIEF //

What is burnout? And what can you do about it?

Burnout is a form of physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion linked to our jobs or work that we do. As well as employment, you may feel burnout around parenting, caring, school, or voluntary responsibilities.

Burnout can happen when you’re under constant pressure or stress, but it can also happen if you’re not set up for success in your role or are unable to meet the

potential you have.

In short, it sucks. So we asked the experts at CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably)

prioritise, de-prioritise, ask for help, and figure out what to do next. And hopefully your brain will feel a little less full. You can even try the ‘Offload Your Thoughts’ tool on the CALM website.

\\ YOU CAN ONLY CONTROL WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL //

3. CHECK IN WITH YOURSELF

If you’re burnt out, you may need to take some time to check in with yourself. Why are you feeling how you’re feeling? Have you got too much on? Is money stressing you out? Do you feel under pressure or unable to cope with your workload? Maybe you don’t feel like you’re living up to your potential, or to expectations that

Whatever it is, being able to pinpoint what’s getting you down is the first step in finding solutions to feel better. It might not be an overnight fix, but you can start to build a plan and get back to feeling

4. FOCUS ON WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL

Let’s be honest, sometimes you can’t control the stuff that’s stressing you out. Workplace politics, promotions, pay, workloads and capacity… no. This isn’t a list of boring words, it’s just some of the stuff that can get your goat during the 9-5, 5-9, or any of the times you put in a shift.

You can only control what you can control. Spending effort and energy on stuff that you can’t change is a surefire way to make yourself feel crap.

So if something’s stressing you out, ask yourself: ‘What can I do to change this situation?’ If the answer is nothing, or you’ve already done all you can, then trying to go with the flow and move past the situation is probably your best bet.

And if it’s really impacting you, it might be time to think about long term ways to change the situation – whether that’s a new job, a new focus, or talking to someone at work about your concerns.

5. SET BOUNDARIES

Checking an email under the table while your mates chat about the footy. Scheduling a parent-teacher meeting and missing the plot of your current Netflix binge. Popping into work to check the team is doing okay on your day off. They might seem like small things, but when the line between work and home begins to blur, it can be hard to get real recovery time.

We all need time to recharge, and if we’re checking our emails, or even just worrying about work around the clock, our bodies and brains aren’t able to get the rest they need. Setting boundaries is essential for staying healthy.

Boundaries will be different for everyone, but they might look like setting a deadline for when you check emails, or removing work group chats from your phone. It might be giving yourself a limit to how many times you check in on work when you’re on holiday, or how many children’s parties you can attend in a month.

You might find scheduling a set time to relax with no distractions is helpful. Or putting your phone on do not disturb after 10pm. Find what works for you –you’ll never truly know what situation another person is in.

\\ BOUNDARIES WILL BE DIFFERENT FOR EVERYONE, BUT THEY MIGHT LOOK LIKE SETTING A DEADLINE FOR WHEN YOU CHECK EMAILS, OR REMOVING WORK GROUP CHATS FROM YOUR PHONE //

6. TAKE A BREAK

Being overwhelmed or burnt out means you’ve been burning the candle at both ends for too long. While we’re able to meet tough deadlines or intense workloads for a short time, long term exposure to high stress conditions is a recipe for exhaustion.

If that’s you, taking a break is really important. That might be taking time off for a holiday, or if you’re struggling to get on with daily life, you might need to speak to a GP about what you’re feeling. They might recommend time off from work for a short period so that you can rest and recover.

Of course, the best option is to make sure you take regular breaks from work and your responsibilities before you reach burn out. If you recognise things are getting too much, try to organise breaks and time to switch off.

that’s with a good old hike or sitting in the local park and taking a breather. Connecting with mates, gaming, heading down the pub for a catch up, or taking the kids to the zoo were all up there. The long and short of it? Find something you enjoy and make time to do it. It sounds counterintuitive but taking breaks can actually help you get more done by improving work performance and focus.

8. YOU ARE NOT DEFINED BY YOUR JOB

Our jobs and the work we do can become really linked to our sense of who we are. After all, most of us spend the majority of our time doing them. But mixing up who we are and what we do for work too much can lead to issues – including, you guessed it… burnout.

If your job is part of your identity and way of viewing success, you’ll

It’s great to care about the work you do but your body and your mind need a chance to switch off and reset. If you are working around the clock, you’re less likely to take those breaks and set those important boundaries.

\\ OUR JOBS AND THE WORK WE DO CAN BECOME REALLY LINKED TO OUR SENSE OF WHO WE ARE //

Blurring the lines between your value and your job can also make work harder in other ways. Setbacks are more likely to get you down, and feedback or disagreement can feel like it’s personal.

So how can you stop your job

BE A BETTER YOU

Why brotherhood matters

Every man needs people. Real people. Not just colleagues, drinking buddies, or acquaintances. Brotherhood is about having a tribe – the kind of group that sees through the front, calls out self-deception, and backs you up without question.

A tribe isn’t measured by the number of friends; it’s about the quality of those connections. Brotherhood is built on trust, accountability, shared laughter, struggle, and honesty. While it takes work to maintain, it’s worth it.

\\

SOMEWHERE ALONG

THE

LINE, WE TRADED BROTHERHOOD FOR BRAVADO //

There’s something a lot of men won’t say out loud – but more of us are feeling it than we care to admit: we’re lonely.

This isn’t the kind of loneliness that can be fixed with a night out or a few texts. It’s the quiet, gnawing kind – the sort that creeps in as life gets busier, friendships get thinner, and the emotional walls we’ve been taught to build get taller.

It’s not because we don’t want connection. It’s because we’ve been raised in a culture that rewards self-reliance, emotional distance, and a kind of performative toughness. Somewhere along the line, we traded brotherhood for bravado. And a lot of us are now paying the price.

The silent epidemic

The stats are alarming. Nearly 1 in 3 men report having no close

friends, while 1 in 5 say they don’t have anyone they can confide in when times get tough. This trend, observed across various age groups, suggests a widening gap in emotional connection.

Clinical psychologist Dr. Joshua Klapow highlights the problem with this lack of connection: “Loneliness isn’t just an emotional experience; it has profound effects on a man’s physical health and wellbeing.”

Men are often told that needing support is a weakness. That reaching out signals failure. That real men simply “deal with it”. But this narrative is a lie. And it’s costing lives. Suicide is the leading cause of death for men under 50. Men account for nearly 75% of all suicide deaths. One of the reasons? Women often share their feelings and experiences with each other; while men tend to internalize. The stigma around male vulnerability has made it harder for men to open up.

When men have a tribe, it’s not just about receiving support during tough times. It’s about becoming a better version of themselves – not only for their own benefit but for the people around them. As sociologist Dr. William J. Robinson states: “The strength of a community lies in the strength of its members. Brotherhood is an engine for personal growth.”

HOW WE LOST CONNECTION – AND HOW TO GET IT BACK

So why is it so difficult for men to form deep friendships in adulthood?

A few things get in the way: We move. For work, for family, for opportunity. We get consumed by careers and responsibilities.

We fear rejection, or awkwardness, or being “too much.”

We wait for someone else to make the first move.

However, connection doesn’t happen by accident. It has to be built intentionally. And forming a tribe doesn’t require a large social circle. It could be as simple as three close friends who really understand you, two mates you can call at 2 a.m., or one friend who’s seen your worst and still sticks around.

BE A BETTER YOU

HOW TO BUILD YOUR BROTHERHOOD

1

BE BRAVE ENOUGH TO GO FIRST

Reach out to someone. Suggest a catch-up. Ask how they’re really doing. It takes courage to start the conversation, but someone has to – why not you?

MAKE IT REGULAR

2

Brotherhood isn’t sustained by occasional messages or yearly meetups. It requires consistent effort. Create regular opportunities to connect – weekly meetups, monthly dinners, or Sunday walks.

3

TALK ABOUT MORE THAN SURFACE-LEVEL TOPICS

Light conversations have their place, but at some point, someone needs to

Ask, “How’s your head?” It doesn’t have to be a therapy session – just real.

4

BUILD TRUST, SLOWLY

Not every connection will develop into a deep friendship – and that’s okay. Invest in the ones who understand your needs, respect the boundaries of those who don’t, and focus on the people who share your desire for deeper connection.

DROP THE MASK

5

The pressure to be always “on” –funny, successful, unshakeable – is exhausting and gets in the way of people connecting with the real you. Brotherhood thrives when men show up as their full, authentic selves, with all their strengths and vulnerabilities. That’s where the magic happens.

NO LONE WOLVES

The world often tells men to be lone wolves. But the truth is, lone wolves don’t last long. The ones who thrive – who grow, heal, and weather life’s storms – are the ones who run in packs.

If a man has been feeling burdened, lost in his thoughts, or something seems missing – it may not be weakness. It may just be the absence of brotherhood.

So maybe it’s time to find your tribe – or

Over 70%.

That’s how many registered suicides in 2023 were male.

Men aren’t seeking help until they get to crisis point. We need to be open to seeking help and talking. “ ”

Gavin is a scriptwriter and mental health advocate, and also a Trustee for Derbyshire Mind. He lives with borderline personality disorder and post traumatic stress disorder, and turned to Mind in some of his darkest times.

How to talk about mental health this Christmas It might not always be clear when someone’s unwell. But if you’re worried, there’s ways to start up that conversation.

Ask open questions

That’s a question that invites someone to say something more than ‘yes’ or ‘no’. It could be something like ‘How have you been feeling?’

Give them time

You might be anxious to hear their answer, but it helps if you let the other person take their time to talk.

Reach out

You can get support through Mind’s Infoline. It’s open 9am-6pm, Mon-Fri (except bank holidays) on 0300 123 3393 and info@mind.org.uk

In an emergency always call 999.

For more advice and support about managing mental health, scan this QR code.

Please consider donating to Mind this Christmas. With your help, we can be there for everyone who needs us, so everyone can find support for themselves or someone they love while there’s still time.

Photo by Matt Wellham Mind, 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ. Mind (The National Association for Mental Health) Limited by Guarantee Reg. Charity Number 219830 Registered in England and Wales Number 424348.

EAT WELL FEEL BETTER

James Collier, one of the world’s leading nutritionists and co-founder of Huel, explains how simple changes can transform your body – and your mind.

What does a “good” diet look like in 2025?

When it comes to our health, what could be described as a “good” diet covers a range of ways of eating. However, in 2025, we should acknowledge that we’re bigger than ourselves: what we choose to eat affects not just our own bodies, but also other people and the planet. That’s the heart of my dietary philosophy.

\\ WEIGHT-LOSS DRUGS ARE NOT RISK-FREE //

That said, a good diet has a few common features. It should prioritise fibre and protein-rich foods to keep you full, and include a broad range of vitamins, minerals, and essential fats like Omega-3. And while it doesn’t need to be entirely plantbased, it should be plant-rich – full of wholegrains, legumes, nuts, seeds, fruits, and vegetables.

We should prioritise our physical

and mental health – because a diet isn’t sustainable if it can’t sustain an individual.

Is there one food group most of us should be eating more of?

Definitely fibre. We have a serious fibre crisis. Just 9% of UK adults are getting enough, yet it plays a critical role in everything from digestive health to appetite regulation and disease prevention. Whole foods like oats, beans, and veg are ideal sources – but some fortified, processed options can help too.

In a busy life, is there a place for ultra-processed foods?

I’m betting five or six years ago, most people hadn’t heard the term “ultraprocessed food”. Now, it’s an everyday term! Yet the term “ultra-processed food”, or ‘UPF’, lacks a suitable definition.

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Many highly processed foods can be highly nutritious, like so-called UPF wholewheat breads, plant-based meat alternatives, baked beans, and high-fibre breakfast cereals.

It’s the junk food UPFs – those high in fat, sugar, and salt, and low in fibre and micronutrients – that we should be reducing our intake of. These are hyper-palatable, convenient, cheap, high in calories, and low in nutrition. Most of us are consuming too many of these foods. For sure, these can be included as part of a healthy diet, but their intake should be limited. This is why I prefer the term “junk food” to “ultra-processed food”. The term ‘junk’ implies that they aren’t nutritious, rather they’re extras you can enjoy as long as you’re otherwise eating sufficient high-quality foods.

Should we be supplementing on top of a healthy diet?

It depends. Most of us who are consuming a varied diet shouldn’t need to supplement. Certain supplements can have a role in certain conditions. For example, Vitamin B12 in vegans (as most plant foods are devoid of this essential vitamin), Vitamin D3 in cooler climates during the winter months, or Omega-3 in non-fish eaters.

But remember that supplements do exactly that – supplement – you can’t fix a poor diet with supplements!

Where do you stand on the increasingly popular weightloss drugs?

They shouldn’t be used if you just want to trim a little unwanted podge. Someone who’s otherwise in good health and with a BMI of, say 28, should be asking themselves if they really need these medications.

Weight loss drugs like Ozempic and Wegovy are brand names for semaglutide, a type of GLP-1 agonist that suppresses appetite.

Tirzepatide – commonly known by the brand names Mounjaro and Zepbound – is even more effective than semaglutide because it mimics other hormones as well as GLP-1.

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The drugs are not risk-free and there’s a lot we don’t know about them. They are not for people who just want to slim down or lose a bit of weight before a holiday. They are for those who have continuously tried to lose weight and whose health might be at risk as they age. The BMI criteria for them to be prescribed is typically over 30, but could be lower with at least one weightrelated health condition.

How do they actually work?

These drugs help turn down food noise. People with a lot of food noise constantly think about food. Their subconscious brain constantly reminds them to seek out food. Hundreds of genes have been identified to be associated with a greater degree of food noise. This was useful when food was scarce, but now we live in a food environment where food is easy to acquire and delicious, food noise can be a constant struggle. While eating a meal, people with high food noise might already be thinking about their next one. GLP-1 drugs help to muffle this food noise and that’s why they’re so effective.

However, you’ll likely require these drugs long-term unless you change your lifestyle. So this means choosing nutrient-dense foods to ensure you’re getting the nutrients you need.

What’s your advice for someone considering trying weight-loss drugs?

Crucially, seek advice from your doctor and do not buy these drugs from online pharmacies or, worse, the black market. You might not be getting semaglutide at the correct dose or even the correct compound at all. Yet, the vast majority of GLP-1 prescriptions are currently coming through online pharmacies. One reason for this might be that people struggle to access their GP – getting an appointment can be a nightmare! These drugs should be prescribed by a health professional who knows the drugs and your medical history, and together, you can weigh up the risks.

While they’re useful to control diabetes and weight loss, GLP-1s are not a cure. Choosing good foods and being physically active will be crucial to success. They are drugs for life.

Stopping the injections will result in your appetite and cravings coming

back, unless you take measures to mitigate this and adopt changes to your lifestyle.

So what is the best way to live healthier in 2025?

Trying to make multiple changes in one go is likely setting yourself up for failure. Change your behaviours one at a time. For example, start by exercising for just 15 minutes at the same time every day –while making no other changes. When you’re used to this, try limiting chocolate to just one small bar a week. A month later, add five minutes to the exercise session. Don’t “go on a diet” – slowly and surely make changes that will result in health improvements. And be patient!

What’s more important – diet or exercise?

Having a good diet and being physically active are both important, but the

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evidence points to being active as the bigger predictor of living well as you get older. Exercise helps reduce stress, strengthens muscles and bones, and helps us feel good. It also helps to boost our mental health and focus.

What’s your numberone piece of advice for someone trying to stay on top of their health?

There’s a reason I named my dietary approach ‘contemplative nutrition’. I want to urge people to pause and consider – just a little – why they’re choosing the foods they do. Learn to recognise feelings of hunger and satiety. As well as this, try to be physically active, as this will massively help to reduce the risk of illness and boost you mentally.

But there’s one thing that’s often overlooked. Eating is not just what we eat; it’s also about how we eat. There are huge benefits from enjoying food in the company of others. Research has shown that mealtimes help us make healthier food choices, make us more connected to other people, reduce stress, and boost brain chemicals associated with happiness. Whenever possible – even if it’s just once or twice a week – try to sit down for a family meal or share food with a friend.

Well Fed: How Modern Diets are Failing Us (and what we can do about it) by James Collier (HarperNonFiction) is out now.

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