October 2021 OutreachNC by OutreachNC

OCTOBER 2021 - 1

O C T O B E R

Feature Intro: Aging Around the World: In our series Aging Around the World, we’ve explored what it means to age and thrive in the second half of life from multiple cultural perspectives. The people we’ve interviewed have allowed us windows into cultures across the globe, from Ghana to Greece. Now, we conclude our series with a special interview from our own country. Born and raised in the United States, Roman Jacobs talks about his life as a Native American, part of the Lumbee Tribe, here in the Sandhills. Jacobs talks about his life in his early years, which have shaped so much of how he lives today, in his 77th year, still on the same land with his family. This interview has been edited for length. OutreachNC: Thank you for sitting down with us, Mr. Jacobs. Have you always lived in North Carolina? Roman Jacobs: Yes ma’am. I was born in Red Springs, NC. We moved to Hoke County in 1960.

continued page 6

CONTENTS

ASK THE EXPERT: DO YOU HAVE THE TIME?

2 0 2 1

FEATURE: AGING AROUND THE WORLD EAT RIGHT: LACTOSE INTOLERANCE FAITH: BUILDING UP

LETTER FROM THE EDITOR

Amy Phariss, Editor-in-Chief, OutreachNC | editor@outreachnc.com

OCTOBER 2021 - 2 The days are officially cooler. I walk out each morning and am hit by a jolt of fresh, crisp air. The leaves are turning, and I’ve begun packing away my summer clothes. October has arrived. If there is a more beautiful time for the Sandhills, I’m not sure what it is. Our counties are alive with color; the sky is bright and clear, and it finally seems appropriate to order the pumpkin spice latte – hot. This month, we have our last Aging Around the World interview with Roman Jacobs of Hoke County, North Carolina. As a Lumbee American Indian, Mr. Jacobs describes aging from the perspective of his culture and shares with us the stories and memories from his childhood. We especially appreciate Mr. Jacob’s insight and lessons learned. Colette Bachand offers hopeful words on the inevitable wearing down of life but also the beauty in building up. You’ll understand it when you read Bachand’s words, which express this idea with humor and grace.

Age the Way You Choose. We can help! • Accredited caregiver registry • Placement and transition • Crisis Intervention • Ongoing dementia care • Assistance with meals & transportation • Coordination of legal, financial & health care professionals • 22 years eldercare experience

Finally, Callie Yakubisin writes about lactose intolerance, which so many of us have struggled with! Just in time for holiday meals and parties, Yakubisin explores the many myths of lactose intolerance and offers tips for how to enjoy dairy foods without pain. I’ve been on a short story kick as of late. I’m all wrapped up in Flannery O’Conner, J.D. Salinger and Eudora Welty. One of Welty’s characters sums up October perfectly:

“Only today”, he said, “today in October sun. It’s all gold, sky and tree and water. Everything just before it changes looks to be made of gold.” Indeed,

facebook.com/agingoutreach/ instagram.com/agingoutreachservices/

OCTOBER 2021 - 3

Fall in Love with Fox Hollow Senior Living

190 Fox Hollow Road Pinehurst, NC 28374

910-695-0011

Fox Hollow Senior Living has a dedicated team of professionals, beautiful decor and grounds, and daily stimulating activities designed to enhance the lifestyle of our residents. We make every day more exceptional than the last, for the amazing people who call us home.

Experience Our Lifestyle • Assisted Living offering exceptional senior living experiences

• Weekly housekeeping and personal laundry

• Award-winning Memory Care Program – Bridge to Rediscovery™

• Assistance with tasks of daily living, such as bathing, dressing and medication management

• Daily resident safety checks

• Five Star Dining Experience, featuring chef-prepared meals • Lifestyle360 activities for well-rounded days

• Scheduled local transportation available • Emergency response system

• All utilities included • On-site rehabilitation and therapy

• Secure outdoor courtyard and gardens

Pet Friendly

Ashley Seace, Care Management Associate | ashleys@aoscaremanagement.com

ASK THE EXPERT: DO YOU HAVE THE TIME?

OCTOBER 2021 - 4 I was recently prescribed a new medication regime. I’m unsure why it’s important for me to stick to specific times for taking the medications, as long as I am taking them daily. Can you explain? This is a great question! Taking your medications at the time recommended by your doctor can prevent conditions from worsening and help you feel your best. Also, taking medications asprescribed helps avoid hospitalization and even death. The reason your doctor gave you very specific instructions is because it can make the medication more effective. Sometimes, though, it’s hard to keep track and manage multiple medications. There are several common reasons people don’t take medication as prescribed: • • • • • • • •

not understanding the directions forgetting to take the medication forgetting if/when medication was taken uncertainty about how to take the medication (with food, for example) having several medications to take each day desire to avoid negative side effects uncertainty about medication effectiveness the cost of the medication is too high

All of these reasons can make medication management challenging. Here are tips to stay on track with your medication. Helping a loved one manage medication in person can go a long way to keeping a schedule on track. Having a caregiver come into your home around the time you take your medicine is helpful. They ensure your medicine is taken correctly and help keep track. Another option is hiring an Aging Life CareTM manager to come weekly to help set up your medication box and make sure that you are following directions. Care managers also help find ways to afford medication by providing resources that lower the cost of prescriptions. They’re also a good resource for communicating with doctors about side effects or dosage adjustments. Medication boxes with alarms are also great options. You can set the alarm for the specific

time you have to take your medication. The alarm will go off and will get increasingly louder until you take your medication. You can also put timer caps on pill bottles, which go off when you are supposed to take your dose. Picking a set day each week to refill your box will help maintain your schedule. When picking up your medications, pharmacists recommend ways to adhere to a routine or even provide medication management therapy to get you on a schedule. Some pharmacies offer a program to simplify the pickup process by having all medication available on the same day each month. Several pharmacies offer a delivery service that bring the medications straight to your door. Pharmacists can also ask questions at pickup to help organize your routine and offer solutions. These questions might include “how do you remember to take your medications,” “how would you know if you missed a dose,” or “how do you organize your medications?” Regardless of how you manage your medication, it’s an important routine to implement and give attention. Your health can be impacted by taking medication properly, and medication management can prevent or slow the progression of disease. Maintaining open communication with your doctors and pharmacists can provide you with clear steps for taking your medications as prescribed.

The Gerald Claude KirbyFriday-Sunday Trust Family Event December 10-12 Advertising Sponsored by Sponsored byTrust 11:00 AM The –Advertising 4:00 PM Gerald Claude Kirby December 10-12 Friday-Sunday The Gerald Claude Kirby Trust Any monetary donation to enter the festival!

De • sit OCTOBER 2021 - 5 A 11:00 AM – 4:00 PM Miracles at Weymouth Holiday Festival will include events for the whole family. ’s Any monetary donation to enter the festival! Miracles at Weymouth Ho WE WILL BE ADHERING TO CURRENT CDC GUIDELINES Miracles at Weymouth Holiday Festival will include events for the whole family. e, WE WILL BE ADH Enjoy the decorated windows • on’t WE WILL BE•ADHERING TO CURRENT CDC GUIDELINES Enjoy ManyJoin vendors and artisans Visit Us for an All Outdoors Many v as Enjoy the decorated windows • Santa and Mrs. Claus at Santa’s Family Event Santa for Many vendors and artisans • Visit toy shop • Enjoy hot chocolate, December 10-12 Friday-Sunday Join Us for an All Outdoors Join Us for an All Outdoors toy sh coffee, cookies, food AM boxes •Santa Don’t and Mrs. Claus at Santa’s ed 11:00 – 4:00 PM

Miracles at Weymouth M i r a c l e s a t W e y m o u t h s a t W e y m o u t h Holiday Festival

HolidaayyFFeesstitvivaal l

FamilyEvent Event Family

Any monetaryown donation to enter the festival! miss Weymouth’s Christmas toy shop • Enjoy hot chocolate, Miracles at Weymouth Holiday Festival will include events for the whole family. December 10-12 Friday-Sunday December 10-12 Friday-Sunday Shoppe • Decorated Red Truck for cookies, coffee, food boxes • Don’t e WE WILL BE ADHERING CURRENT CDC11:00 GUIDELINES AM 11:00 AM– –4:00 4:00PM PM Christmas • BlueTO Truck Decorated Any monetary donation to enter the festival! miss Weymouth’s own Christmas Any monetary donation to enter the festival! Enjoy the decorated windows • for Hanukkah • Various Miracles at Holiday Festival include events for thethe whole family. ManyMiracles vendors and artisans • Visit at Weymouth Weymouth Holiday Festival include events for whole family. Shoppe •willwill Decorated Red Truck for Entertainment throughout the Santa WE and WILL Mrs. Claus at Santa’s TO GUIDELINES WE WILL BE BEADHERING ADHERING TOCURRENT CURRENT CDC GUIDELINES Christmas • Blue CDC Truck Decorated toy Three shop • Day EnjoyEvent hot chocolate, Enjoy the decorated windows • decorated windows • ● Many vendors and artisans for Hanukkah • Various coffee, cookies, food Enjoy boxes •the Don’t Enjoy the decorated windows Many vendors and artisans • Visit ● Visit Many vendors andSanta artisans Visitat Santa’s and throughout Mrs.•Claus toy shop ● Enjoy miss Weymouth’s own Christmas Entertainment the Santa and Mrs. Claus at Santa’s ● Don’t miss hot chocolate, coffee, cookies, food boxes andforMrs. Claus at Santa’s Shoppe • Decorated Santa Red Truck ● Three Day Event Weymouth’s own Christmas Shoppe Decorated Red Truck toyDecorated hot chocolate, Christmas • Blue Truck toyshop shop••Enjoy Enjoy hot chocolate, ● Blue Truck Decorated for Hanukkah ● for Christmas cookies,Various food boxes • Don’t for Hanukkahcoffee, • Various throughout the Three Day Event coffee, cookies, foodEntertainment boxes • Don’t manities miss Weymouth’s own Christmas Entertainment throughout the miss Weymouth’s own Christmas Weymouth CenterThree for the Arts Humanities Weymouth for theRed Arts Truck & Humanities Shoppe Decorated for Day Event&•Center 555555 E. Connecticut Avenue Shoppe • •Decorated Red NC Truck for E. Connecticut Avenue Southern Pines, • weymouthcenter.org Christmas • Blue Truck Decorated Southern Pines, NC Christmas • Blue Truck Decorated for Hanukkah • Various weymouthcenter.org for Hanukkah • Various Entertainment throughout the Entertainment Weymouth for thethe Arts & Humanities DON’T JUST LIVE HERE... ThreeCenter Daythroughout Event 555 E. Avenue Three DayConnecticut Event

coffee, miss W Shoppe Christm fo Enter

Weymouth C 555

Weymouth Center for the Arts & Humanities LOVE IT HERE. Southern Pines, NC 555 E. Connecticut Avenue Southern Pines, NC weymouthcenter.org

weymouthcenter.org

Weymouth Center for the Arts & Humanities 555Center E. Connecticut Avenue Weymouth forPines, the Arts & Humanities Southern NC 555 E. Connecticut Avenue weymouthcenter.org Southern Pines, NC

weymouthcenter.org

Schedule a Tour Today. Call to learn more.

Residents of Quail Haven Village love the living choices, abundant resort-like amenities and nearly endless social engagements available to them. Here, residents and their families will love the emphasis on nutritious dining options, whole-person wellness and the peace of mind that comes from having continuing care in place should they need it.

Call 910.295.2294 to schedule a private tour and don’t just live here...LOVE IT HERE. 155 Blake Blvd., Pinehurst, NC 28374 QuailHavenVillage.com A Life Plan Community offered by Liberty Senior Living.

121081 quail haven love it here flowers ad-onc.indd 1

6/11/21 9:43 AM

d n u o r A g n i g A d l r o W e h t

OCTOBER 2021 - 6

by Amy Phariss ONC: What brought you here to Hoke County? RJ: Farming. My father sharecropped. He did that pretty much all his life. He did a 2-year tour in World War II just before I was born. He left out of New York and went to England on the Queen Mary. He loved to tell about that. He’d tell you stories. He’s told me several times about a time when they were going over, and due to the Japs and the Germans, they liked to destroy life. There were so many people on that ship because it was turned from a cruise line to a military ship. They had gunships follow them to protect them. It got real stormy one night. The ship started leaking and they had to lower their anchors until they could get it fixed. Sometimes he’d tell about that and cry. You hear these stories sometimes and you think of it, and it has more of a sensitive meaning to it when the person is gone and not around to tell you of it anymore. It bothered him a lot. It would bother me.

The thing about those soldiers was there was no second chance. Now it’s sad that people don’t care, younger people. Back in those days, people had to stick together. It didn’t matter your race or religion. The people next to you were your family. My daddy remembered those men even after the war. WE don’t have people growing up now who are that patriotic anymore, you know? ONC: What was your childhood like? RJ: Well, I experienced quite a bit of tragedy in my life. Because of Daddy’s inability to provide adequately (no disrespect to him…as I grew older I got more respect for Daddy because he had PTSD). So, he wasn’t able to hold a job. He just had the sharecropping. That’s just to get by. I’ve seen Christmas go by and it would be just another day. There’s not too many people my age that have seen that, but I did. And knowing the condition he had, as a child, it was hard to understand. As I grew up…I understand now.

OCTOBER 2021 - 7 I remember him sitting by himself a lot. I think there was loneliness. And he would try to save money. He’d try to hide from the children that there wasn’t enough money. There was dignity and pride. They don’t want to acknowledge that they’re a failure, that they can’t keep up with the standards of his community, of his neighbors. There weren’t that many jobs out there to get, so we had to stay with sharecropping. That’s just survival. I went to school when the lunchroom was 10 and 15 cents to eat lunch. You can probably count it on your fingers how many times I ate in the lunchroom. A lot of times I went to school without breakfast, and there wasn’t money for that lunchroom. You can imagine what it felt like to sit in that school and smell that lunchroom. Even though the school was pretty small, you could just sit there feeling hungry. It’s really hard to try to explain what that can do to you. It is bound to affect any child’s ability to learn. You’re thinking: I’m hungry. I’m hungry. But Daddy’s thing was to go to school and get an education. Daddy was for us going to school and got real upset if we messed around and the bus left us. We didn’t have a car, so if we missed the bus, we had to walk. It really done him good if he saw us doing well in school. He had a fifth-grade education, but he could do pretty much anything that a high school graduate could do as far as reading, writing and arithmetic. He could sign and write a letter. In fact, he did a lot of that for people. He picked that up in the Army. He was only in about two years or so, but there were a lot of things he had to grasp and do it quick. You didn’t have your entire lifetime to debate on. ONC: Do you think, in the end, the Army was good for him or bad for him? RJ: I’d say it was good for him because it instilled a lot of pride. He honored this country. That’s something, as an older person, it’s sort of like taking the gospel out of your church or taking the Lord out of your services, you know, you’re worshiping in vain. Sort

of like our country – and I love this country and have patriotism. For someone who never served, I don’t think you could find anyone would loved this country more. I’ll do anything to see this flag fly. There is a certain honor that you just don’t depart from. I think of the people who have served and died and lost their lives to be able to raise that flag. I don’t take that lightly. They don’t get to see this homeland again. My daddy was a living example to me, like a signature on a check. If you didn’t sign it, it doesn’t mean a thing. He loved this country so much. ONC: What was your mom like? RJ: She was the hustler. She had to take the reins. No disrespect to dad, but she had to be the frontrunner in a lot of cases. She worked on the farm. She had too many children. I’m the oldest of 11. ONC: What was life like for your parents as they got older? RJ: They got closer. When Daddy was real sick, you could tell she wanted us to do nothing that she thought was not in his best interest. He was the same way. We’d take him out but he’d say he had to get back to the house to get Mamma her medicine. ONC: How are older people viewed in Lumbee culture? RJ: I think they’re honored and respected, but I think a lot of older people in our culture feel sometimes neglected. In my expectations of life, you grow up and you can to help yourself, you don’t sit around and wait for a handout so much. For my own experience, society, I don’t believe, realizes the effect it has, when you work all your life, say you own your home or whatever, you’re decided how to debit out what you’ve got. That is difficult. One of the harder things is that giving up. It’s not so much like doing wills and all to your family and children, but giving up your control of your dominion, you know what I mean? It’s something like, you’ve been the man or the woman of the house all your life, and now I’m going to be

OCTOBER 2021 - 8 living in somebody else’s home. I try not to let it bother me, but that has been very difficult. I’ve had to leave my home. Staying at a retirement home would be one of the last things I’d want to do. That would be difficult for most older people in the Lumbee culture. I just pray to the Lord it never happens to me. ONC: What would that mean to you, not being in your own home? RJ: It would bother you mentally. I think of depression and stress. I like getting out and going. All my life, I’d take my daughter’s kids to school. They’d live with me sometimes, so when she moved out, the boys would still spend a lot of time with me, at least one-third of the time probably. I’ve had people ask me if I didn’t get tired of the children being around me all the time. I said, “No. No. I feel lost when they ain’t around. I enjoy them.” To me, I see my grandparents in myself. My grandmother especially. Now my granddaddy was good too, but my grandmother would tear your rear-end up and then give you a bottle the next time. She taught you the love of the Lord and the love of each other. She didn’t like to hear you hating or discriminating or destroying things. You don’t ever forget these things. I hope these principles get passed down to my own grandkids. It never bothered me to have the grandkids around. There’s never been a time when any one of them has violated the trust I put in them. They all have keys to my house now. They’d never allow any other kids to be in my house and disrespect it. I take the grandkids to school now. It’s something I look forward to. It gives me a chance to talk to my grandkids, and it gives them a chance for them to ask me questions. My mama’s dad was born in 1886. You think of

the things he could have told me if I’d thought to ask. You can’t read that in a textbook. It’s gone now. I told my grandsons, “You know, there’s a lot of things that you’ll think about asking when I’m not around anymore. So, if you think of something to ask me, ask it now. If I don’t know it, I’ll find out.”

When you read a story in a book, it doesn’t have the same meaning as talking to the person who lived that. Most of our people grew a lot of the food. We raised hogs, chickens and had a milk cow. We raised the vegetables. The women, mostly, had the task of canning. Older women would have a half-gallon jar, and I’d hear them talking about jarring a fruit or vegetable for every day of the year so the children would have something to eat. At least there’d be one container a day. I remember my mom would take a jar of tomatoes and a big bottle of rice and dump those tomatoes in there. I eat it now. At least you had something to put in your stomach. You could survive. You’d have chicken and eggs. And every once in a while, you’d kill a chicken. Potatoes. Lord knows, that’s a hard job. They’d be out there digging sweet potatoes. My granddaddy was big on raising those potatoes.

That was hard work, but it was quality work. People loved each other. And people would take care of each other’s property. We used to live over there where Thunder Valley is; it’s over there near Shannon. There was an old military graveyard. My uncle found a skull. Back in those times, my granddaddy, we had tobacco barns fired with wood to cure that tobacco. We’d sleep in those barns at night. We took a quilt and a pillow. To me that was quality living. You don’t see much

OCTOBER 2021 - 9 of that anymore.

ONC: Why not?

The Native Americans like traditional farming. It’s part of the culture. My daddy had that – it was hard to break away from the culture he grew up with. He wasn’t much into the tractors. He’d have his mules any day. Native Americans like to stay more traditional.

RJ: Well, there was never a reservation for the Lumbee. That’s what the government uses. People act like it’s a handout, but it’s about your dignity.

ONC: What matters most to Native Americans or Lumbee as you get older?

RJ: A lot of Lumbee feel neglected and forgotten.

RJ: I know one of the things that mean a lot to Lumbee, but the one thing I’d like to see is to have the Lumbee Tribe to be recognized. What would matter the most would probably be a healthcare system where people could get proper medical care and you won’t have to forfeit your home. I don’t think anybody should have to do that.

I think we strive for a higher education to better ourselves. The first medical Lumbee doctor I knew of was Dr. Brooks in Pembroke. Back in his day, it was unfounded to hear of a Native American doctor.

Back in my day and time, there were fewer of our people educated enough to have a job to where you would have retirement with insurance. With those jobs, you don’t feel protected. Again, that’s taking away from quality of life as we get older.

ONC: What do Lumbee seniors like to do in retirement?

Think of how much it would affect me to think: I can either sell my house or get medical treatment. Nobody should have to think of that. I pray to the Lord to see the Lumbee Tribe recognized in my life. There’s a pride in it. Pride and dignity go together. It’s like love and respect. You can’t tell me you love me and then disrespect me all the time. I think if our presidents, and I ain’t saying it selfishly, but if they’d put their priorities in order, for everyone, it would help us all. It’s not a handout. It’s not something made up. It may have been the late 1800s that it was suggested the Lumbee be recognized. The state of North Carolina recognizes that. Back in ’55 the government recognized it but it was partial. We wouldn’t be entitled to the same programs.

ONC: What is unique to the Lumbee Tribe?

When I was in high school, I thought: If Dr. Brooks could be a doctor, why do I have to be a farmer?

RJ: Hunting and fishing. A lot of the women like homemaking stuff. I’m speaking from the elders. The younger ones like to dance and get out. Women are getting more into the hunting and fishing and going to the beach. The seniors, I belong to a senior’s group, and they like quilting and canning. I know one lady she can make about anything. She can survive. If you got to the point where you couldn’t buy anything, she could make it.

OCTOBER 2021 - 10 ONC: What do you do in your senior group? RJ: The men will do wood craft, like making chairs, birdhouses and other wooden things. Women mostly quilt. They do needlework and stuff. Beadwork is important. Jewelry and crafts are something the Lumbee like to put a lot of emphasis on. I made a dream catcher. It’s simple when they show you how to do it.

™

lp?

o W E Do T

Thank you for supporting Mums for Memory! ™

™

Your donations allow AOS & Friends Care to provide a a variety of services to older adults, focusing on those with dementia, ™ care grants, including direct personalized music players, robo companion pets, resources, and education.

™

The need for funds and community support is yearround. We invite you to include AOS & Friends Care in your end-of-year donations. ™

ALL DONATIONS ARE TAX-DEDUCTIBLE.

aosfcare.org/donations

That’s one thing the Lumbee people have pride in: jewelry. ONC: What part of the Lumbee Heritage, if any, is being lost? RJ: Our tribal culture, I believe. A lot of younger people don’t care so much about that. It seems like it just doesn’t matter to them as much. If they’re connected to the older people, they might care more or be more interested. ONC: What is the role of elders is the Lumbee culture? RJ: More of a counselor and consultant. I like to say it that way. That’s what I like the best. A lot of things you’re confronted with in your life |experiences helps you with your decision making and the advice you give to people. ONC: If you could pass on any knowledge or lessons to the younger generation, what would they be? RJ: Well, the love of the Lord, that’s above anything else. Love and respect for our native culture and heritage. Never forget who you are, where you came from and where you want to go. Never forget you’re a Native American and a Lumbee and hold that pride. Be a person who is proud of who you are. Never be ashamed of that. Treat everyone as you would like to be treated; the nationality doesn’t matter. I love everybody. If he’s your friend, he’s your friend. When I worked in the prison, there were good people in prison. |

fundraiser thank you!

™

Always treat people right. Do what’s right. Don’t ever muzzle your beliefs.

™

Callie Yakubisin, RD, LDN | cyakubisin@thedairyalliance.com

EAT RIGHT: LACTOSE INTOLERANCE

Can you think of someone in your life (maybe it’s you!) that avoids some or all dairy foods because of lactose intolerance? I know I can. Lactose intolerance can occur to varying degrees and happens when the body isn’t able to fully breakdown milk sugar (lactose). I understand that no one wants to worry about having an upset stomach after enjoying a meal, but lactose intolerance doesn’t have to mean complete dairy avoidance. As a registered dietitian that knows the value dairy foods can bring to a diet, I want to clear up a few misconceptions.

All dairy foods contain high amounts of lactose. Thankfully this is not true. In addition to dairy foods specifically made for those with lactose intolerance, like lactose-free milk, natural cheeses like Swiss, Cheddar, and Parmesan have minimal amounts of lactose and are another option for those with lactose intolerance to try. That means you can serve a beautiful charcuterie board that pairs natural cheeses with juicy fresh fruit, crunchy roasted nuts, and a warm wholewheat baguette knowing even those with lactose intolerance should be able to enjoy it. Plant-based yogurts are my only option if I have lactose intolerance. Not quite. Although yogurt does contain lactose, because it is a fermented food it also typically contains beneficial bacteria that helps digest the lactose. Those with lactose intolerance may find they tolerate real yogurt with live active cultures better than other dairy foods because of this. Yogurt is a great way to add both protein and beneficial bacteria to smoothies; a green smoothie made with Greek yogurt, spinach, apples, and aromatic ginger is a perfect way to wake up your taste buds in the morning or repair your muscles after a workout! You don’t miss out on much if you eliminate an entire food group like dairy. Food provides more than just calories; it provides a wide range of minerals and vitamins along with other important components our bodies need to thrive. When entire food groups are eliminated, there is a risk of not getting enough of the nutrients your body needs to thrive. We see evidence of this in the fact that the Dietary Guidelines for Americans points out that about 90% of Americans are not meeting dairy recommendations and that calcium, potassium, and vitamin D (which can be found in dairy foods) are being under consumed by Americans. A milk allergy is the same as lactose intolerance. This is false. A milk allergy, which is a response to the protein in milk, is not as common and requires an

OCTOBER 2021 - 11 avoidance of dairy to prevent a potentially serious allergic reaction. For those faced with this challenge, a registered dietitian can help provide guidance. Alternatively, when you have lactose intolerance you are dealing with symptoms related to your body not properly digesting the milk sugar. Unlike milk protein, you can find many dairy foods that either naturally occur with very low levels of lactose or have the lactose filtered out. Using lactose-free milk in a fall favorite like Butternut Squash Soup is an easy way to make a more inclusive soup that people of all lactose-digesting abilities will be able to enjoy! If you’re avoiding dairy because of lactose intolerance but miss the delicious taste and nutritious benefits, try lactosefree milk, natural cheeses, and fermented yogurt. They may be just the right fit for you!

Butternut Squash Soup

Make a festive soup for the holiday season with roasted and pureed butternut squash. Garnish with smoked paprika and roasted squash seeds for a special touch. Total Time: 1.75 hour | Servings: 6

Ingredients

• 1 large butternut squash (about 1 pound) • 2 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil • 1 medium onion, chopped • 4 cloves garlic, minced • 2 cups chicken broth • 1 tsp sweet smoked paprika plus more for garnish

• 2 dashes cayenne pepper • ¼ tsp sea salt (or to taste) • 4 fresh sage leaves, chopped • 2 cups lactose-free milk • Pepitas or roasted squash seeds (optional)

Instructions

1. Cut off ends of squash, quarter, remove seeds and stringy pulp (save the seeds and roast them). 2. Place in lightly-greased baking dish. Roast at 350˚ for one hour or until tender. 3. Allow to cool then scoop out squash. Set aside. 4. Heat oil in heavy-bottomed stock pot over medium heat. 5. Add onion and garlic to stock pot and sauté about 3 to 5 minutes until onions are tender and translucent. 6. Stir in butternut squash. 7. Add chicken broth, paprika, and cayenne. Use sea salt to taste. 8. Reduce heat and simmer 15 to 20 minutes. 9. Stir in sage and milk. Cook until heated. 10. Puree with immersion blender. 11. Taste and adjust seasoning as desired. 12. Serve warm. Garnish with roasted squash seeds, if desired.

Notes

Source of recipe: thedairyalliance.com

The Rev. Colette Bachand | cwood@penickvillage1964.org

FAITH: BUILDING UP

OCTOBER 2021 - 12 Sometimes we have no idea we are being built up, especially when we are certain we are being beaten down. My sneakers taught me this lesson recently. To cope with the stresses of pandemic life, I’ve walked more than ever. Eleven months ago, I bought a new pair of sneakers, nothing fancy or fashionable, just something to keep me walking, lest, as they say, “move it or lose it.” I was determined not to lose it. So, for nearly a year, I’ve strapped them on to go … to walk off my stress, worries and fears. I became a sort of Forrest Gump of walkers. When I was overwhelmed, I just walked. Most of the walks were around my neighborhood or at the reservoir. The furthest those sneakers ever took me was back in March on Sunset Beach, NC, where I rented a small room. The morning I arrived, I didn’t know what to do to “unwind” so I just started walking. I clocked 10 miles one day, which to greater athletes may not seem impressive, but to me it signified something bigger. For three days I didn’t stop walking, until finally, at some point, I met myself somewhere where the waves met the sand. “All shall be well,” it whispered, words of the great mystic woman theologian Julian of Norwich. Fast-forward to a few weeks ago. One morning I sat down to lace up my sneakers and I realized the entire heels had been worn off. There was no sole left. There was no sole left.

The past year and a half has tried to do this to us, to literally wear down our souls. The word “weary” is one I hear in my travels and ministry with older adults. They are weary of all the pandemic has stolen from these years called “golden.” But in the seniors, I see what I saw in my sneakers. Though well worn, my sneakers represented survival, resiliency, stamina and faith. Perhaps when we are at our lowest, we don’t realize how strong we are becoming. Perhaps it isn’t until much later we realize the tough thing we went through gave us wings and strength and a new soul. We are in the season of autumn, a bittersweet time that reminds us the planting is done and the harvest begins.

I wonder what you might harvest in yourself right now? Though it has tried to wear you down, I guarantee something beautiful has grown inside of you in this season of pandemic. Perhaps it is gratitude, or patience, or love, or confidence, or a new self-awareness. Psalm 61 begins by saying, “Truly my soul finds rest in God.” Everything in nature, including our souls, will rest this next season, that we might be ready for the time of new life in spring. The pandemic may have tried to wear down our souls, but God has been with us. We have been building strength, wisdom, clarity, and now we harvest those gifts. Yes, I’ve bought a new pair of sneakers, Praise the Lord, and spent a little extra money this time on a pair with thicker soles. A thicker soul has grown in each of us, and along with new sneakers, we are ready for the road ahead.

GRAY MATTER GAMES

ACROSS 1. Hits hard 6. Discompose 11. Provokes 13. Weak 15. Timid, childish man 16. “So soon?” 17. “___ alive!” (contraction) 18. College fee 20. “Fantasy Island” prop 21. Locale 23. Apprehensive 24. Hacienda hand, maybe 25. Fishhook line 27. Ballad 28. Shoulder gesture 29. Mourner 31. Category 32. Contemptible one 33. Grimace 34. Letters 36. Betting information

seller 39. “Silly” birds 40. Greyhound, e.g. 41. Hang 43. Absorbed 44. Ringlets 46. Back of the neck 47. “To ___ is human...” 48. Layered ice cream dessert 50. Blazer, e.g. (acronym) 51. Run away lovers 53. Not worth using 55. Differing from accepted standards 56. Thaw 57. E-mail option 58. Detroit’s county DOWN 1. Literary composition 2. Handgun sheath 3. Arctic bird 4. “Check this out!”

5. 1988 Olympics site 6. Fusion 7. Building near a silo 8. Trick taker, often 9. Those who climb up and over 10. Repulsive 11. Awry 12. Out of proper order 13. Tinker Bell, e.g. 14. Eager 19. Get misty-eyed 22. Snob 24. Four-wheeled horse-drawn carriage

26. Freetown currency unit 28. Kind of fund 30. Big wine holder 31. Bluecoat 33. Lost 34. Mollusk diver 35. Scold 36. Gang land 37. Dodging 38. Drive back 39. Excessive desire for wealth 40. Explode 42. Retain with stone

OCTOBER 2021 - 13

44. Traveling amusement show 45. Strength 48. Clap 49. Soft porous rock deposited from springs 52. Lulu 54. “Don’t give up!”

Open Arms Retirement Center

“Making a Difference in the Lives of Others” Assisted Living | Memory Care | Music & Memory Certified

Let us help you in making a decision about the care you are seeking.

612 Health Drive | Raeford | 910-875-3949 www.openarmsretirement.com

OCTOBER 2021 - 14

RESOURCES. EXPERIENCE. SOLUTIONS.

We’re here to help you navigate all things aging! www.AOSNC.com info@AOSNC.com | 910.692.0683 Find current & previous issues of OutreachNC Read the latest from our blog Join our free digital mailing list Sign up for home delivery of OutreachNC; Only $16 for 12 issues Send us your questions

Cataracts • Cornea Diabetic Eye • Glaucoma Dry Eye • LASIK • Retina Macular Degeneration Cosmetic Botox Eyelid & Brow Lifts 910.295.2100 • 800.733.5357 www.carolinaeye.com

Gray Matter Games Solutions

OCTOBER 2021 - 15

• Pay Bills • Track income & expenses • Maintain accurate ﬁnancial records • Organize tax information • Manage the administrative tasks surrounding your checkbook

We value your trust and loyalty. Our commitment to your safety remains our number ONE priority. We're excited to welcome you back to a safe We are happily accepting new patients!

"As daily money managers, we create and maintain a road map of your ﬁnances."

Anne Seline 910.683.0606

305 Page Road | Pinehurst, NC

APSeline@EDCNB.com EveryDayChecksandBalances.com

4 SIGNS YOU MAY NEED A CAPTIONED TELEPHONE

Our Practice Is Your Solution 1 With 28 years of service under her belt, Mia Lorenz has just about seen and tackled it all. Lorenz consistently shows that she gets the job done with care, passion, and vigor.

Margaret “Mia” Lorenz Attorney at Law MLorenz@LorenzCreedLaw.com

She is with you “every step of the way” in your quest to maintain control and dignity as you age and/or experience illness; she advises on resources available including legal documents, to make sure your goals are achieved during life and after your passing.

You frequently ask your caller to repeat themselves. Caller voices seem quiet or muffled, even at max volume.

You struggle to catch every word over the phone.

You avoid making phone calls.

Get your CapTel phone at

captelnc.com

CAPTEL 840i

FEDERAL LAW PROHIBITS ANYONE BUT REGISTERED USERS WITH HEARING LOSS FROM USING INTERNET PROTOCOL (IP) CAPTIONED TELEPHONES WITH THE CAPTIONS TURNED ON. IP Captioned Telephone Service may use a live operator. The operator generates captions of what the other party to the call says. These captions are then sent to your phone. There is a cost for each minute of captions generated, paid from a federally administered fund. No cost is passed on to the CapTel user for using the service. CapTel is a registered trademark of Ultratec, Inc. NC Department of Health and Human Services • Division of Services for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing • ncdhhs.gov/divisions/dsdhh • NCDHHS is an equal opportunity employer and provider. • 04/2021

H STA O Y AN M E I N D LO YO SA N U FE G E R R R

OCTOBER 2021 - 16

910.499.0399

Your Cer tifie d Accessibilit y Spe cialist s Ser ving All of Nor th Carolina

ACCESSIBILIT Y SOLUTIONS TO FIT YOUR NEEDS

• Ramps (purchase & rental) • Grab Bars • Handrails • Stairlifts • Vertical Platform Lifts

• Bedroom & Bathroom Safety Products • Ceiling Lifts • Pool Lifts • Home Safety Automation • And More!