Medical Examiner 5-17-24

Page 1

CRASH COURSE

More Americans have died on US roads since 2006 than in World Wars I & II combined

One of the most maddening and puzzling things about highway driving is getting stuck in a traffic jam. “Stuck” is the operative word. The last exit is miles behind you, the next one miles ahead. There is nothing to do but wait, either for traffic to completely clear and let people get rolling again, or to inch forward enough to reach an exit ramp and break free.

That’s the maddening part.

The puzzling part is the odd experience of enduring a huge slowdown or stoppage, but as the flow eventually returns you never see any reason for the problem. No orange cones; no construction zone; no speed traps; no wreck or any lingering evidence of one.

{ { TAILGATING CREATES TRAFFIC JAMS

The whole thing was a complete mystery, its cause a phantom.

To traffic engineers, these unexplained traffic jams are no mystery. They know exactly why traffic can slow to a crawl for miles for no apparent reason.

Believe it or not, it’s all about those four bracketed words above. Or to save time we

could go with just one: tailgating. It’s true, and there is an abundance of research from all over the world to prove the point. The science of traffic flow is heavy on math — and the numbers offer plenty of reasons to avoid tailgating — but a tremendous amount of real world and test track evidence clearly establishes that tailgating is the sworn enemy of smooth traffic flow and the people who want it. Tailgating is by far the most common cause of phantom traffic jams. It works like this in heavy, congested traffic: Driver #1 is sailing along minding his own business, although he’s closer to the car ahead than he should be. But that front car slows down, or a car moves between the front car and Driver #1. Driver #1 taps his brakes, maybe for just a second. What happens next: the car behind Driver #1 brakes for two seconds, the person behind him for four, then the next car six seconds, the one after that for ten seconds, then 12, then 20. The slowdown

DO SOMETHING GREAT BEFORE IT‘S TOO LATE

I’m sitting here wondering will a matchbox will hold my clothes.

I ain’t got no matches, got a long way to go.

I’m ole poor boy, a long way from home.

Guess I’ll never be happy, everything I do is wrong.

(Carl Perkins)

Carl Perkins spent a lifetime making a fortune singing his songs. He toured the world with his guitar and his wig, making us all happy as our hearts thumped to the rhythm of rockabilly.

But I think Carl was on to something. He might’ve had an insight into this simmering insecurity that dwells in most of our souls. While growing up, we tend to look at those around us and think they may be taller, prettier, smarter, richer, or happier. It ain’t so. In reality, they have the same insecurities that each of us suffer from. It is a human thing.

Gradually, through education and maturity, we come to understand that all of us are pretty much the same. That which makes us differ is our work ethic, our understanding

BASED ON A TRUE STORY

(most of the time) A series by

of personal limitations, and more importantly, how we excel with the talents that we are born with. But talent alone is not enough. You must develop your talent. It is said that being a genius is not enough. You must be a genius at something. Carl Perkins took his innate insecurity and developed it into a rockabilly song that makes your toes tap and your fingers snap. He could have sat at home and worried about his receding hairline. But he didn’t do that.

Carl heard Big Joe Turner’s line: Like a one-eyed cat peeping in a seafood store, I see you ain’t a kid no more (Shake Rattle & Roll). Carl did not need the “glass half full vs. glass half empty” lecture in a college psychology class. He developed what he felt. It was

HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS AUGUSTARX.COM AIKEN-AUGUSTA’S MOST SALUBRIOUS NEWSPAPER • FOUNDED IN 2006 TMMEDICALEXAMINER MAY 17, 2024 FREETAKE-HOMECOPY! Please see CRASH COURSE page 10 GOT MEDICARE? A LOCAL AGENT CAN STILL HELP! • Personal, local answers and assistance
Review your current plan for optimum benefits
Call to see if there is an enrollment for you
All services provided at no cost to you Serving Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina and Michigan • Email: srsoos@yahoo.com Independent Medicare Broker Renea Soos 706-399-1989 • soosbenefitsgroup.com RENEA SOOS
+
Bad Billy Laveau
Please see BAD BILLY page 9
AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 2 + IS YOUR FAVORITE PILLOW THESE DAYS DONUT-SHAPED? AUGUSTA VASCULAR CENTER 630 13th St., Suite #250 • Augusta 30901 PHONE 706-724-2500 AUGUSTA VASCULAR CENTER WEST 3623 J. Dewey Gray Circle, Suite #100 • Augusta 30909 PHONE 706-854-9932 AugustaVascularCenter.com WE CAN HELP HemorrhoidEmbolizationisanon-surgicaloptionwithaquickerrecovery. CALL FOR AN APPOINTMENT TODAY! STERNUM

PARENTHOOD

Around dinner time, it can get pretty hectic at home. You’ve been working and the kids have been in school. It starts settling down when your teenage daughter grabs some food from the refrigerator and takes it to her room. Your tween son sits in front of the television with what you have picked up at a drive-through. Your young son is sitting at the dinner table with you while he plays games on his phone and you are catching up on Facebook and Instagram. Seems like you’ve handled it all pretty well. Have you?

A. Yes. Everyone is busy and calm and doing what he or she likes to do.

B. Yes. I need a little time to catch up on what I’ve missed all day online before I have to get after the kids to get homework done and get ready for bed.

C. No. Mealtime should be a time for everyone to talk to each other and catch up on what happened during the day.

D. Yes. We tried the mealtime thing, but everyone was always checking their phone and fighting and getting up and down constantly. This is best for us.

If you answered:

A. Everyone may be calm, but it’s not a family. It is a few people under the same roof each doing his or her own thing.

B. It’s not about you. It’s about what is best for your children. Each of them going in a different direction is not in anyone’s best interests. And, teens should not isolate themselves in their rooms, especially with electronics.

C. This should be your goal at least three or four times a week. It is difficult with kids who are in extracurricular activities (a positive thing) or who are addicted to electronics (a very negative thing). Good scheduling, clear expectations, and advanced planning can make it happen.

D. You abandoned an important family activity. Set rules, such as no electronics at the table; we share the table until the parent is finished eating; we use kind language only.

Good habits start early. Even with very young children, they should be exposed to eating as a family without distractions around. Evidence shows that eating dinner as a family has long term benefits for the children, such as decreased rates of depression, eating disorders, teen pregnancy, substance abuse, and obesity, and better self-esteem and academic performance. Families that eat together also tend to eat healthier foods. It is a good time for each family member, young and old, to share what happened during the day. A good question to start off: “What’s the best thing that happened to you today?”. It’s worth the challenges of getting the routine going. Everyone benefits from the increased communication, learning manners, and the togetherness.

Dr. Umansky has a child behavioral health practice in Augusta.

MEDICAL MYTHOLOGY

CEREAL IS HEALTHY

Well of course it is! Was there ever any doubt? If there was, all anyone needs to do is watch some commercials for breakfast cereals. All of these products are just about the healthiest thing a person could eat.

Still doubtful? Look at the picture accompanying this article. That should settle things. Or not.

The problem with breakfast cereals is all the trade-offs. Virtually every box of cereal, even Lucky Charms, prominently features all of the purported health benefits of the product inside. The first thing you may see on a box of Lucky Charms is “whole grain” in big letters. Also prominently featured: “Gluten Free;” “0g Saturated Fat,” and that a serving has just 110 calories. Front panels will variously trumpet no preservatives or artificial flavors, announce how much fiber a serving contains and how little fat and sugar, and how

Here is some serious food for thought: what healthy food do you know that offers exactly 10% of the Daily Value of a nice list of vitamins and minerals? How could such a thing even be possible?

Reading between the Nutrition Facts lines, if every nutritional value of a cereal is exactly 10% or 25% or 50%, that means the cereal itself contributes nothing. If it did, wouldn’t some of the values be 11%, some 14%, others 21%?

beneficial the cereal is to help lower cholesterol and promote heart health. They often boast something like “50% (or some other high percentage) of the daily value of 7 (or 10 or 12) vitamins and minerals.”

The trade-off is that, while everything on the front of cereal boxes is true, so is everything on the side of the box in the nutrition label.

The labels usually have two columns, like the one shown below, one with the nutrition facts of the cereal alone, the other including the added nutrition provided by 3/4 of a cup of skim milk.

The bottom line: the headline to the left is absolutely a myth, at least when it comes to most store-bought mass market cereals.

One thing that is not a myth, though, is that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. After all, it comes after 12 hours or so of fasting, so that oft-repeated phrase is not just marketing. A breakfast that is actually healthy is vital. What are some better options than cereal? Among the healthier choices: eggs, oatmeal, Greek yogurt, berries, whole wheat or rye toast, nuts or nut butter, cottage cheese, and smoothies. Oh, and coffee.

www.AugustaRx.com

www.AugustaRx.com • E-mail: Dan@AugustaRX.com

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER 3 MAY 17, 2024 + + Opinions expressed by the writers herein are their own and/or their respective institutions. Neither the Augusta Medical Examiner, Pearson Graphic 365 Inc., nor its agents or employees take any responsibility for the accuracy of submitted information, which is presented for general informational purposes only. For specific medical advice, diagnosis, and treatment, consult your doctor. The appearance of advertisements in this publication does not constitute an endorsement of the products or services advertised. © 2024 PEARSON GRAPHIC 365 INC.
The Medical Examiner’s mission: to provide information on topics of health and wellness of interest to general readers, to offer information to assist readers in wisely choosing their healthcare providers, and to serve as a central source of salubrious news within every part of the Augusta medical community. AIKEN-AUGUSTA’S MOST SALUBRIOUS NEWSPAPER Direct editorial and advertising inquiries to: Daniel R. Pearson, Publisher &
Dan@AugustaRx.com AUGUSTA
Editor E-mail:
MEDiCAL EXAMINER P.O. Box 397, Augusta, GA 30903-0397 (706) 860-5455
TMMEDICALEXAMINER
www.Facebook.com/AugustaRX
THE FIRST 40 YEARS ARE ALWAYS THE HARDEST
+ THANKS FOR READING!

Who is this?

For t he first time in the 212-installment history of “Who is this?” we’re going for a do-over. Does that sentence have a familiar ring to it? It should. Last time we profiled the noted German scientist Paul Ehrlich, adding details we missed when we did a brief bio of him in installment #2 of this series back in June 2015. This time it’s only sort of a do-over. The name of the man above is Paul Ehrlich. The differences? This one clearly wasn’t born in 1854. And he’s usually referred to with his middle initial: Paul R. Ehrlich.

To answer the obvious question first, these two Paul Ehrlichs are not related. And while Paul the 1st was known for advances in chemotherapy and immunology, Paul the 2nd is famous for being an environmental prophet, although not a very good one.

Back in 1968, he released a book — The Population Bomb — that got a tremendous amount of attention. Its warnings and predictions were dire and terrifying: in the decade to come (that would have been the 1970s) hundreds of millions of people will starve to death due to overpopulation and the inability to feed Earth’s multitudes; he argued that the situation in some countries like India and Egypt was “hopeless,” so further efforts to help their populations was a waste of resources; in 1970 he warned that within ten years, all important sea life would be extinct; coastlines all over the world would be uninhabitable because of the stench of dead fish; by the year 2000, England will not exist, he predicted, hanging on as “a small group of impoverished islands inhabited by hungry people.”

We didn’t say that he was an accurate environmental prophet. On the other hand, neither Paul Ehrlich nor his wife and co-author Anne have ever renounced any of their predictions or recommendations or admitted any errors in their basic arguments, and they seem oblivious to any and all criticism from the academic community. The Ehrlichs maintain that their only major errors (not their word) are in specific dates.

Maybe they have a point. Well, some points.

Millions of people continue to die of hunger every year, all these decades after the warnings of 1968. The malnutrition death toll is well beyond 3 million at this moment en route to a year-end total expected to be around 9 million. Globally, some 822 million people don’t make it to the table long enough or often enough to avoid hunger and malnutrition. It is a fact: we have too many people and not enough food for the people we have. Paul Ehrlich said not long ago that if he were to rewrite his book today, he would use language that would be even more apocalyptic.

In some respects, it is a wonderful thing to have people who sound alarms that need to be sounded. Hunger and overpopulation are definitely huge problems that need solutions. On the other hand, “The Boy Who Cried Wolf” syndrome can negate the effectiveness of future warnings that may be accurate and that very much need to be heard and heeded. +

EVERYONE HAS A STORY

AWhat is a biopsy?

biopsy is not an autopsy. Sometimes when we hear that we need a biopsy, our mind can race forward to a negative conclusion.

MayoClinic.org defines biopsy as “a procedure to remove a piece of tissue or a sample of cells from your body so that it can be tested in a laboratory. You may undergo a biopsy if you’re experiencing certain signs and symptoms, or if your healthcare provider has identified an area of concern. A biopsy can determine whether you have cancer or another condition.”

A nodule on my upper left lung was found in a CT scan when I was in the hospital in September due to a severe concussion.

My primary care physician referred me to a doctor who is a specialist in diseases of the lungs and respiratory system. This pulmonologist ran a CT scan and took a biopsy in November. The news was good, although a no-cancer diagnosis was uncertain.

The biopsy procedure to collect tissue from inside the lung is called a bronchoscopy. An endoscope (“a thin, flexible tube with a light and camera on the end to see structures inside your body” according to MayoClinic.org) was inserted into my mouth and down.

I was asked to make another follow-up appointment in February, which involved another CT scan and a second biopsy. The doctor telephoned me the next week after he received the results of the biopsy. I received his report on March 15.

The biopsy did indicate a type of cancer which had grown from 3 cm to 6 cm. It is in an early stage, and the doctor said it is treatable with surgery, chemo, and radiation.

How could I have lung cancer? I have nev-

er smoked. After doing research on the topic, I learned that second-hand smoke can also cause this type of cancer.

When I was growing up, my father, brother, and sister smoked. Mother and I never did. Our family had a country general store, and most customers smoked. As a young adult, I was again exposed to second-hand smoke for another seventeen years.

How do I cope with my situation and diagnosis?

• Be active As a high energy person, I am in motion most of the day and only slow down after dinner.

• Pamper myself with a manicure, a pedicure (or both); being out in nature; having quiet time.

• Listen to music and sing along or dance inside my home.

• Rest and relax Take a nap; meditate; read a book, soak in the tub.

• Breathe deeply. The February 2 Medical Examiner suggested the following 4-7-8 process: inhale while counting to 4; hold while counting to 7; then slowly exhale while counting to 8. The process is helpful, for example, before having blood pressure taken. I can feel my shoulders and body physically relax.

• Treasure those who care and uplift my spirits with prayers; encouraging words; sharing a meal; offering to drive me to doctor appointments; sending cards; calling to see how I am doing; sending flowers from the church; and especially sharing hugs.

I am blessed.

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 4 + +
#212 IN A SERIES
1349 Druid Park Ave at Wrightsboro Rd. (across from Augusta Cup) Jeremy Garrard, NP Practitioner & Owner SUBSCRIBE TO THE ONLINE EDITION! IT’S FREE! Just go to www.issuu.com/medicalexaminer and enter your email address.

Middle Age

Last time, if you recall, I shared how I had just wrote a column saying that we need to protect our health by protecting our wealth, and then I immediately turned right around and spent a lot of money on a zero-turn lawn mower. The scarlet letter embroidered on my chest is an “H.”

The counterpoint to that is encompassed in YOLO (You Only Live Once). Last issue, I also pointed out how spending money on things that make life easier for us may be money well spent. You know, like that mower with the comfy seat and the ability to cut large acreage faster than a speeding bullet, and jump tall ditches with a single bound?

In this issue, let’s talk about another area where we have to balance prudent use of money with keeping joy in our life, because a life without joy may not seem worth living and it certainly won’t help your mental, emotional, or physical health either.

case with some families I know who hardly vacation at all, even though they could afford to. They just don’t make it a priority.

{ THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE NOT THINGS

One of the traps that people easily fall into is materialism. We think things will make us happy, and so we go into debt to get that beautiful automobile or that huge house on the hill. Sure, there is the initial joy, but it is a never-ending game you can’t win. Trust me, I know. If we were sitting in a circle in a YMCA meeting room right now, I’d be standing up and telling you my name, that I am a materialaholic, and my credit card has been sober for… well, let’s not get into that in case my wife reads this column. Shhh! Not a word!

Anyway, when I’m down, my tendency is to buy something that I think will lift my spirits. It’s called retail therapy, and it is strongly encouraged by advertisers. The fact is that it is exciting to get something new, and sometimes there is a brief period of happiness associated with acquiring said thing. However, most of the time it is very brief. There are exceptions of course, like if you buy a musical instrument, but only if you follow that up by actually investing the time to learn how to play it instead of it just being another thing you have to dust.

So I want to focus on buying experiences as a way to spend our money. Things like vacations, concerts, sporting events, parties with friends, hikes in the woods, strolls on the beach, fishing, etc. In my youth and now, I have always enjoyed a vacation, but I have tended to go back to the same familiar places that I know well and love. Places like Hilton Head Island, the Great Smoky Mountains National Park, Myrtle Beach, Hunting Island, Clarks Hill, Orlando, and other Florida destinations. We have travelled to other places as well though, like California, Washington, DC, and even Hawaii, but by and large, we repeatedly go back to familiar places. There is nothing wrong with that and in my opinion it is better than not traveling at all, as is the

Early in our marriage, my better half and I attended a lot of concerts, but as we got older, the thought of being out “late” (after sunset) and in the midst of loud, boisterous crowds just wasn’t as appealing. We’ve still been to a few in recent years from local venues to the Fox Theatre in Atlanta to see some musicals. Some of which I loved and others not so much, but it was still cool to see the Fox Theatre. Our second real date was a Georgia Bulldogs football game, and we even attended the G-Day game in Athens in 2023, and we have seen a few Augusta Green Jackets games, but by and large, we just haven’t felt much motivation to get out there. When we actually do it, we enjoy it, but we’re worn out afterward and we seem to remember that part the most.

All that said, when you look back on your life, there will be times when a purchase meant enough that you still remember it, like your first car, or your home. But what about concerts, football and baseball games, paddling on a river or lake? Traveling to an exotic locale? Those things stand out in our memory. I have referred to them before as mountains in life. When you turn around and look back, you don’t always see the valleys and the plains, but the mountains stand out and demand to be seen. Even if you just want to go to the same places, that’s fine too, but take that time to spend with your family and friends and make more memories to look back on while you enjoy it in the moment. And don’t worry too much about capturing every moment in a photo or on video. Live in that moment. At the most recent concert I went to it seemed like everyone had their cameras up to capture the experience. I think it is better to live the experience and take just a few photos or videos. How about you? Maybe even leave the phone on your nightstand or in your car sometimes while you enjoy actually talking to people or have some uninterrupted peace if you are alone.

You don’t even need to spend a lot of money to “buy” experiences. We are blessed to live within a comfortable day trip to ocean, mountains, zoos, aquariums, theme parks, lakes, rivers, and more. Even a staycation with a visit to the Augusta Museum, the Morris Museum of Art, the Lucy Craft Laney Museum, a local park, or some other local option with friends and/or family can be a great experience to store away in your book of memories.

A couple of weeks ago, with all of that in mind, I did something I’ve never done before. I talked one of my old friends into going to a

IS VAPING SAFER THAN SMOKING CIGARETTES?

Maybe. But does anyone really know for sure?

Cigarettes became popular in the US in the early 1800s, but it took until the 1940s and 50s before they were linked to lung cancer and other diseases. By comparison, vaping has only been around for 20 years.

Yes, so far the consensus of the healthcare community is that vaping is less dangerous than smoking, but that really isn’t saying much. Cigarette smoking is the #1 cause of preventable death in the United States. It kills almost half a million people every year, playing some role in almost 20% of all deaths. Just about everything is less dangerous than cigarette smoking. There is no expert who has the data to confirm that vaping is less dangerous than smoking who would further add that vaping is safe.

One of the issues scientists are looking into is the respiratory effect of various flavorings used in vape cartridges. For starters, there are many different formulations in use from one manufacturer to the next, and that presents its own set of problems. On the plus side, the two most common solvents used in flavorings are considered safe enough to eat. However — and this is a key point — they are not meant to be inhaled, and they are proving to be at the very least airway irritants. As an example, in an unrelated situation workers at a microwave popcorn factory developed severe respiratory disease (known informally as “popcorn lung”) from inhaling a safe-to-eat butter-flavoring chemical.

Scientists have identified formaldehyde (classified as a probable human carcinogen) as one of the toxic byproducts generated by vape pen solvents and flavoring agents, and studies have already found such formaldehyde levels to exceed safe and acceptable limits established by the Environmental Protection Agency.

Some of the current areas of investigation connected to e-cigarettes include tooth decay and damage to tooth enamel, eye diseases, and the expected lung diseases, cancer, and damage to DNA.

As a super-quick summary, health scientists say people who smoke cigarettes would be better off switching to e-cigarettes, but someone who has never smoked would be better off not only continuing to not smoke, but never start vaping either. There is too much about e-cigs that falls into the realm of the unknown. Simply put: inhale fresh air as close to 100% of the time as possible. +

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 5 Please see MIDDLE AGE page 6 +
ADVENTURES IN
{
Lessthan a million people can’t be wrong! Advert ise here Advert ise here ehtnioJ snet fo seinapmoc ohw ydaerla !sutroppus Call us today! (706) 860-5455 + +

WHENEVER YOU HEAR AUTO CORRECT

OF US.

DOWNTOWN 990 Telfair

706-724-0900 W. AUGUSTA W. AUGUSTA 3954 Wrightsboro Rd 706-863-9318

MIDDLE AGE

from page 5

803-649-1341

MARTINEZ MARTINEZ 4014 Washington Rd 762-685-5555 COLUMBIA 4031

803-590-8606

concert to see a band we both loved back in 1982 when they first came on the scene. I didn’t just get him to buy a ticket for the concert. I got him to join me in buying a VIP ticket at over $200! That ticket lets us be at the soundcheck. We get in early, we get a ton of memorabilia, and the cherry on top is that we get to sit front row center, because I camped out virtually on my computer the day they went on sale and I struck fast. I surprised myself by spending this much to see one of my favorite old bands, especially since at the moment only one original member is even in the band for this tour. The band I am talking about is the super-group Asia. Originally it was Geoff Downes on keyboards (formerly of The Buggles and Yes), John Wetton on vocals and bass guitar (formerly of UK, Uriah Heap, and King Crimson among others), Steve Howe on lead guitar (formerly of Yes), and Carl Palmer on drums (formerly of Emerson, Lake, and Palmer). Sadly, John Wetton passed away a few years ago, but Geoff has found a great singer who sounds more like John Wetton than any other I’ve heard. Carl Palmer, though technically still considered a member of Asia, couldn’t make this tour due to other obligations, but Geoff got an amazing drummer who has played with these people and is familiar with the music. Ditto for the lead guitarist who even played extensively with John Wetton and is also a virtuoso as all of these gentlemen are. It is happening in July at the Evans Performing Arts Center, and I can’t wait for the experience. I did get to see my two favorite bands in the past couple of decades, one of them even multiple times, and this is another check mark on my bucket list. Sadly, it is too late for some of them now and I will have to satisfy myself with tribute bands, but some of the tribute bands are very good and I am determined to budget more of my money on experiences than I have in the past.

Like they say, “you only live once.” Of course, some would argue that point with beliefs about resurrection, reincarnation, etc. but none of us can be certain of our future prospects once we have taken a dirt nap, so why not enjoy ourselves now… within reason.

J.B. Collum is a local novelist, humorist and columnist who wants to be Mark Twain when he grows up. He may be reached at johnbcollum@gmail.com

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 6 +
Augusta Office: 2283 Wrightsboro Rd Augusta, GA 706.733.3373 Aiken Office: 2110 Woodside Executive Ct Aiken, SC 803.644.8900 GADERM.COM
+ CATCH THE C&C AUTOMOTIVE SHOW SATURDAY MORNINGS FROM 8-10 ON 580 AM OR 95.1 FM • Customer shuttle • 6 months same-as-cash financing • 3-year/36,000 mile warranty • ASE Certified technicians • 24-hour towing & key drop • www.ccautomotive.com WARRENVILLE WARRENVILLE
Jefferson Davis Hwy
DOWNTOWN
2355
803-593-8473
St
Broad River Rd
AIKEN AIKEN
East Pine Log Rd
NOW IN THOMSON! 1213 Washington Road (706) 986-5427 OUR NEWEST LOCATION! Courtesy Shuttle Financing Options 24-Hr Towing Available 24-Hr Key Drop-Off Rental Cars Available & & & &
536
NO APPOINTMENT NEEDED! THE MONEY
EVERY OTHER MONTH
THINK
DOCTOR

TRYTHISDISH

Olé! Made with chile-flavored, lycopene-rich tomatoes, zesty cilantro, buttery avocado and more, this chicken omelet is filled with plenty of south-of-the-border flavor. Enjoy it with tropical fruit and steamy corn tortillas for a quick mealtime solution.

Ingredients

• 3 large eggs

• 1 tablespoon water

• Pinch of freshly ground black pepper

• 2 teaspoons olive oil

• 1/2 cup diced, canned tomatoes with jalapeños (or with green chiles), drained, divided

• 1 can (5 oz.) of chicken in water, drained; or 1/2 cup chopped leftover cooked chicken breast**

• 1/4 cup shredded Monterey Jack cheese

• 2 tablespoons chopped, fresh cilantro

• 1/2 teaspoon oregano

• 1/2 avocado, sliced cilantro sprigs, for garnish

Directions

Combine eggs, water and pepper in a small bowl; whisk gently to blend the

whites and yolks, but not to make them frothy.

Melt the olive oil in a 10inch, non-stick skillet over medium-high heat, tilting to coat the bottom and sides. Once the oil is hot, pour the eggs in.

As eggs start to set, lift the edges so the uncooked egg mixture flows underneath. Cook until the eggs are set and no visible liquid egg remains, about 1 1/2 to 2 minutes.

Top half the omelet with 1/3 cup tomatoes, chicken and cheese; sprinkle with cilantro and oregano. Flip the

unfilled half of the omelet over the top.

Heat until lightly browned on the bottom, then slide onto a plate to serve.

Top with remaining tomatoes and avocado slices. Garnish with cilantro.

Yield: 2 Servings.

Nutrition Breakdown: Calories: 140, Fat 2g (0g saturated fat), Cholesterol 30mg, Sodium 350mg, Carbohydrate 10g, Fiber 1g, Protein 22g

Recipe courtesy of Mealtime. org, on behalf of the “Canned Food Alliance.”

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 7 + 461 Greene Street at 5th • www.gregleopardlaw.com • 706-724-7511 GREG LEOPARD PC ATTORNEY AT LAW CRIMINAL DEFENSE • FAMILY LAW • PERSONAL INJURY He just looks friendly. Your fierce defender Events by Deborah, LTD Complete, affordahle, local weddings, beautiful settings, $100 Rev. Deborah Page PO Box 1961• Augusta GA 30901 (762) 383-2981 GA Business License #23118854 • Established 2013 IF YOU CAN READ THIS please thank MEDICALEXAMiNER advertisers + PLEASE SUPPORT THEM. THEY MAKE THIS NEWSPAPER POSSIBLE. OVERHEAD DOOR COMPANY OF AUGUSTA/AIKEN (706) 736-8478 / (803) 642-7269 WWW.OHDAUGUSTA.COM TM These businesses all started in a GARAGE Garages matter. Make yours an Overhead garage. +
OMELET CON POLLO LIFE IS COMPLICATED Death doesn’t have to be. Caskets & More 706) 738-2999 • WWW.CANDMAUGUSTA.COM OUR NEW ADDRESS 4212 WHEELER RD • BLDG D, UNIT 1• MARTINEZ LIKE THE MEDICAL EXAMINER ON FACEBOOK! FACEBOOK.COM/AUGUSTARX.COM
Follow

TO MOTHERS WHO SUFFER IN SILENCE

Last week’s Mother’s Day prompts me to dedicate this column to those moms who are discovering, against all willpower, that alcohol is beginning to erode their lives. I recently interviewed a mother who wishes to remain anonymous about her journey. Here is the redacted version:

Ken: Winni, thanks for sharing your story with Medical Examiner readers. How did your relationship with alcohol begin?

Winni: I began drinking at parties in high school, later learning that for women, the earlier they begin drinking the faster their dependence on alcohol progresses. When I became the mother of two children I remembered how good alcohol made me feel, so I started sipping wine while preparing dinner for the family. It made meal prep fun for a change! After six to eight years, though, I started messing up the recipes, holding onto the counter to deal with dizziness, and drinking during meals. My family started calling me, teasingly at first, Winette Winni! That’s when I quit drinking at the table

and started hiding wine for later. Don’t ask me where I hid it!

Ken: When did things start really going south?

Winni: That was the day I picked up my kids from school and had a minor fender-bender in the car pool line. I had started drinking during the day but felt ok to drive. The public safety officer was nice to me, letting me exchange insurance info with the other driver and driving on home. I don’t think he suspected I was intoxicated. My husband knew the deal and went ballistic on me. That just made me drink more secretively. I didn’t drink during the day for awhile, but decided the solution was to be more careful when I did drive after drinking.

Ken: And then what?

Winni: Things went from bad to worse. I figured I worked hard during the day being a good mom and deserved a wine break as a reward after I got the kids to bed. I tried to control my drinking but just could not. It was as if one was too many and a thousand was not enough. Once I took that first drink it was like the old saying “Katie, bar the door.” I later learned that wine ignited a chemical in my brain

that would not allow me to stop drinking anymore til I passed out on the bed with my clothes on. My husband was exasperated with me and told me to stop “or else.” I was ready for “or else” becau se I didn’t think I could live without wine. Ever. He arranged for a family intervention with a professional interventionist and somehow I agreed to go to treatment. After a few days of detox my insurance wouldn’t authorize further inpatient services, but did authorize an intensive outpatient program here in town.

Ken: How did that go?

Winni: Better than I expected. Treatment made stopping drinking much easier than trying on my own. I learned about “relapse triggers” and how to deal with them and learned, for instance, that “it’s easier to drink none than one.” I also got a support system –other mothers who banded together with me who understood me. They became closer than sisters as we did social things together. My husband also got help in the program’s weekly Family Workshop, learning how he was part of the problem. That was hard for him, but it has paid off in our much-improved marriage relation-

ship. I actually like him now! I always loved him of course.

Ken: How long ago were you in treatment, Winni?

Winni: I’ve been sober for 10 years now! I do go to support meetings – not as often as at first – but I still go. It reminds me from whence I have come and lets me help other moms who struggled as I used to. Sober living is much better than drinking living. I’m grateful every day for my life.

If any part of this interview resonates with you or someone you know and love, do call a treatment professional and see how you can get help or learn how to help your friend.

Because suffering in silence is really miserable.

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 8 +
A monthly series by an Augusta drug treatment professional THIS IS YOUR BRAIN
3835 WASHINGTON RD • COMPUTEREXCHANGE.COM • 706-651-1900 WE RECYCLE SALES • INSTALLATION • SERVICE We service all PCs and laptops. Including Apple. COMPUSERVE ISN’T COMING BACK. But is your CompuServe-era computer * still in your garage or attic? * plus other gaming and electronics gear IT’S A FREE SERVICE, AND YOUR DATA IS ALWAYS SECURE (EITHER DESTROYED/ERASED, OR YOUR DRIVE RETURNED TO YOU) YOUR SUPPORT OF OUR ADVERTISERS MAKES THIS NEWSPAPER POSSIBLE +

FOODISMEDICINE

Tasty tips from registered dietitians with the Augusta Dietetic District Association

SPRING INTO HEALTHY HABITS

As we proceed through spring, our days become longer and the weather gets warmer. We can also expect our gardens to bloom with produce and flowers, and we may spend more time outside. The change of season can even encourage us to continue to follow a balanced pattern of healthy and physical activity, both of which are essential in supporting our overall health. Here are four healthy habits that can really help us swing into spring.

Stay Hydrated

• A water first approach will ensure you can avoid getting dehydrated. If you need more flavor, there are ways to add flavor without excessive sugar.:

• Fruit-infused water, unsweetened tea

• Cucumbers, citrus fruits, melons, and mint flavor water almost immediately. Apples, cinnamon, fresh ginger root, and rosemary need an overnight soak in the fridge.

• Pro tip: You can also get fluids from foods such as fruit, vegetables, and salads. Berries are in season for the month of May.

Spring Into Action

• Incorporating regular physical activity as you’e individually able can help reduce the risk of chronic conditions such as heart disease, diabetes, cancer, and depression. Other benefits include increased mobility and building muscle.

• Adults need at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity aerobic activity per week (walking, playing doubles tennis, jogging, or swimming). Activities that strengthen muscles are recommended at least two days a week. These include lifting weights, heavy

gardening, and exercises with body weight resistance/resistance bands.

Aim to Eat a More Balanced Diet

• An eating pattern that emphasized a variety of foods will support overall health.

The 2020-2025 Dietary Guidelines for Americans recognize the following core elements for a healthy diet pattern:

• All vegetable types - aim to eat the rainbow: dark green, orange, red, blue, white, brown etc.

• Fruits - aim for whole fruits for more fiber.

• Dairy - include low-fat or fat free dairy such as yogurt, cheese, and fortified alternatives such as soy milk and almond yogurt.

• Grains - emphasize lean proteins such as lentils, beans, nuts, soy products, poultry, and eggs.

• Oils – include sources of oils such as vegetable oil, olive oil, avocado, nuts, and seafood.

• Pro tip: Eating foods in season is typically fresher and more flavorful. If food is harvested in season, it will have more nutrients. Some foods in season for spring include spinach, strawberries, melons, broccoli, collard greens, carrots, and corn.

Get Adequate Sleep

• Chronic conditions and diseases such as type II diabetes, depression, obesity, and heart disease are linked to lack of sleep. Adults need at least seven hours of sleep per night. For better sleep, avoid large meals, caffeine, and alcohol before bedtime.

• Pro tip: Aim to go to bed and wake up at the same time on both weekdays and weekends.

inside him. He brought it out and polished it. We all have talents and insecurities in the deep cupboards of our minds. It is up to you to open the door and let the real you flow out. The problem today is that we have the “me generation” being taught that everything is about “how you feel right now.” Few people, other than you, care anything about how you feel The world is interested in what you do. How did you make your life better? How did you make those around you happier? How did you make the world better?

Brother Dave Gardner said: Tell me something you believe in. I got enough doubts of my own. He made me laugh with that line. Later on, I wondered if he was dead serious and I was too dumb to understand at the time.

Nobody cares what you are capable of. The world cares what you do. Sir Alexander Fleming could have thrown out the mold growing on petri dishes in his lab. Everybody else called the mold a contaminate and a hinderance. Fleming took the penicillin mold and changed the world. Everyone was capable of making Fleming’s observation. But Fleming did something constructive with what others thought was hinderance.

What did Carl Perkins and Fleming have in common? They ignored limitations and made lemonade out of lemons. (Yes, I know that line is trite, but fits here.) You tend to find what you look for.

John Anderson had the right idea when he sang:

I‘m just an old chunk of coal, but I will be a diamond someday. Hey I’m just an old chunk of coal but I’m gonna be a diamond some day

I’m gonna grow and glow till I’m so blue pure perfect

I’m gonna put a smile on everybody’s face

I’m gonna kneel and pray every day

Lest I should become vain along the way

I’m just an old chunk of coal now Lord, but I’m gonna be a diamond someday.

Life is not about the altitude you hold your head. Life is about the attitude within your head. Life is not about what you can do. Life is about what you do.

Don’t just stand there. Do something. But make sure it is something worthwhile. There is more to life that just eating and excreting. You have an obligation to do something worth repeating by generations to come. If you have not found it yet, keep looking like a one-eyed cat peeping in a seafood store. It is there, somewhere, right before you.

Are you an old chunk of coal? Or a diamond? It is up to you. The world is waiting.

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 9 + BAD BILLY… from page 1 + Hometown. Not big box. parkspharmacy.com 437 Georgia Avenue, North Augusta, SC 803-279-7450 ARKS HARMACYP We passed our drug test! It’s true! Our customers gave us 5 stars! H H H H H
+

wave can continue traveling backwards until cars are actually forced to stop. Does it seem hard to believe? This exact scenario has been observed from the air by researchers and in traffic cam studies countless times.

The solution to this butterfly effect phenomenon is simple: drive in a manner that minimizes the need for braking, even for a second. Obviously that means avoiding tailgating, moderating speed to maintain a healthy distance between you and the car ahead.

Think of two drivers, one practicing this advice and the other following too closely. When the first driver sees brake lights tapped ahead, he takes his foot off the gas to maintain a safe distance. By the time he reaches the point where brakes had been applied ahead, those cars have resumed normal speed. He never needs to touch his brake pedal, which means no one behind him needs to either. Phantom traffic jam avoided!

By contrast, the driver who speeds ahead or is following too closely becomes the next driver to apply brakes, and the one behind him applies his (albeit for a second or two longer), and the one behind him also brakes, as does the one behind him and the one behind him. First thing you know, a phantom traffic jam is well on its way. And once one of them really gets going in heavy traffic, it can last for hours, all from just one quick tap on the brakes.

The whole thing is counterintuitive. You’re late or in a hurry, so it seems like the fastest way to your destination is to step on the gas. The closer cars are to each other, the more traffic that road can handle. Spread everyone out and the roadway is not at its max capacity, and at any given moment you’re farther from your destination, not closer to it.

The irony is that all those extra spaces between cars (assuming everyone did this) and even slighly slower speeds will result in faster travel time and a huge reduction in the chance a traffic jam will erupt — out of nowhere.

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 10 + + CRASH COURSE… from page 1 Call (706) 860-5455 This space available. If interested, please call the number above. mercadolandscapingservice.com Residential & Commercial LAWN MAINTENANCE IRRIGATION DECKING • Guaranteed Full-Service Work Call us today! (706) 220-8118 Free estimates MEDICAL VILLA PHARMACY Reliable Prescription Service • Fast Free Delivery 1520 Laney -Walker Blvd. | Augusta, GA 30901 phone: 706.722.7355 | fax: 706.722.7357 email: CurtisRX@aol.com Marshall Curtis Pharmacist/Owner Baron Curtis Pharmacist Headquarters for the well dressed man since 1963 451 Highland Ave in Surrey Center • (706) 733-2256 • www.gentrymensshop.com ThE On CAN YOU SOLVE THIS REBUS?
The best way to support the Medical Examiner is by supporting our advertisers. WE THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT Like this newspaper?

The blog spot

— posted by

on May 6, 2024 (edited for space)

APPRECIATING A PATIENT’S NAME

I limped into work one morning, tired from the day which had yet to begin. I paused when I did not recognize the name of my first patient. This likely meant that I saw him once, enough to maybe remember the basics of his health care, but not his name.

I pulled up his chart and—oh yeah—I totally remember this guy . I reviewed our initial visit and cataloged four, maybe five, major organ dysfunctions, none of which I could fix. The most obvious was his kidney function. At the time, he was in a zip code just north of dialysis. I stared at the computer, unsure of where, exactly, that left me.

My office note reminded me he had a large abdominal hernia that no sober surgeon would touch. He struggled to walk and had shiny, swollen legs, which hurt to look at. I sat behind my desk, not sure if I had the emotional strength to do something, anything, meaningful for this man. But, I put on my white coat with the knowledge that my patients expected me to face uncertainty with them. I walked into his room and did just that.

Once seated, I was at eye level with a sullen and exhausted man, the one I remembered. I fumbled through some small talk, unsure what could be achieved at today’s visit. Before I collected my thoughts, the patient uncorked a meandering story, one that was hard to follow. Mind you, I had not figured out if today’s visit was a follow-up or a new problem-oriented visit. This fact did not matter as, once he gathered momentum, there was no stopping him.

A bit confused but aware that something significant had started, I pushed back from my computer and listened. I didn’t often do this since I needed to take notes and prepare for what a patient asked of me. This interaction seemed different, and it was.

His story was not a tale of woe, pity, or sympathy. What was it about?

Over the next ten minutes, I received a mini-review of the life events that brought this patient to his current state. Delivered without sadness or blame, it was refreshingly candid, and its honesty shined through the awkward delivery. Its importance landed hard with me.

When I tried to clarify some things, my patient waved me off. At one point he even said, “You need to know these things; that’s why I am telling you.” He stared hard at me, through me, the body language of shut the hell up. I received his message loud and clear—listen and understand—who I am and how I got this way.

When the thirty-minute visit was over, I had not prescribed any medications, ordered any tests, or changed any medications. And I had barely typed on my computer. Viewed through that lens, it was not typically what happened during my workday.

And yet, here is why I cannot stop thinking about this whole affair: he welled up with tears at various points in the story but did not actually cry. I felt a deep—even profound— connection to this patient.

Had this story of survival and persistence ever been told to anyone else? I don’t know. But it was told to me, the internal medicine doctor who would be involved in starting and then stopping his dialysis. To do this properly, I needed to employ humanity and compassion, and more importantly, I needed to know this man. I did not expect it, but that’s exactly what happened when I shut my mouth, sat in my seat, and gave a fellow human being my attention. I learned far more than just his name, James.

+

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 11 +
Ryan McCarthy is an internal medicine physician.
I SHUT UP AND LISTENED Sparkle Wash FREE ESTIMATES! HOUSE • ROOF • DRIVEWAY • WALKWAYS • DECK • PATIO 10% OFF MENTION THIS AD AFTER YOUR FREE ESTIMATE FOR 10% OFF! 706 863.5050 LIKE US ON FACEBOOK! PRESSURE PROFESSIONALS OUR GUARANTEE IF ANY ISSUE OF THIS NEWSPAPER EVER FAILS TO MEET YOUR EXPECTATIONS AS A READER FOR ANY REASON, YOU MAY OBTAIN A FREE REPLACEMENT COPY AT ANY MEDICAL EXAMINER NEWSSTAND AT NO CHARGE, NO QUESTIONS ASKED. HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS • HEALTH • MEDICINE • WELLNESS AUGUSTARX.COM AIKEN-AUGUSTA’S MOST SALUBRIOUS NEWSPAPER • FOUNDED IN 2006 MEDICALEXAMINER APRIL 21, 2023 the JEWELRY SURGEON EYEGLASSES REPAIRED IN THE UPTOWN VA BY THE RETAIL STORE CALL AHEAD: (706) 284-0190 To view my work visit scscja.org. Click on resources, then merchandise. Click on the ring photo, then the PDF link. WE REFURBISH AND REPAIR ROLEX WATCHBANDS AND LOUIS VUITTON PURSES & HANDBAGS Welcome COSTCO and EyeGlass World customers, and former Murphy & Robinson customers! JEWELRY REPAIR CAN PREVENT not reading the Medical Examiner SALUBRIE NOBODY OUT-SALUBRIOUSNESSES THE MEDICAL EXAMINER

There are no decent ENT doctors in this town.

What makes you say that?

CROSSWORD

PUZZLE

ACROSS

1. Jump

5. Fundamental

10. Riverwatch TV station

14. Scratch

15. Bacteria

16. Inwardly (literary)

17. Cougar

18. Mamie had one

19. Jeweler’s magnifier (var.)

20. _____ Club

22. Fish or dress starter

23. Leg joint

24. Tread ending

26. Magician or learned person (archaic or literary)

28. Founder of Islam

32. Braves’ old home

36. Egg

37. ______ Cinemas

39. Top movie network

40. Dull grayish-brown

41. Christian or Doug

43. Mars’ color

44. Medical College beginning

45. Poetic or literary word for a bottomless chasm

46. ____ liner

47. Local historian Ed

49. Effortlessness

53. On sheltered side

55. Tibetan oxen

56. _____ duct

59. Chatter

61. Well-being

65. Ardent; eager

66. Fragrance

68. Hawaiian honeycreeper

69. Basic monetary unit of Ghana

70. Male singing voice

71. Like some pockets

72. Family diagram

73. Swelling

I have this constant buzzing in my ears, but every doctor says my hearing is fine.

Let me ask you: is the buzzing worse outdoors?

As a matter of fact it is. Why do you ask? Just a hunch.

THE MYSTERY WORD

The Mystery Word for this issue: UNSRETM

Simply unscramble the letters, then begin exploring our ads When you find the correctly spelled word HIDDEN in one of our ads — enter at AugustaRx.com

We’ll announce the winner in our next issue!

X A M I N E R S U D O K

DIRECTIONS: Every line, vertical and horizontal, and all nine 9-square boxes must each contain the numbers 1 though 9. Solution on page 14.

74. Takes to court DOWN

1. Kissers

2. Sewing case

3. Peak

4. Drug prefix

5. Pacify

6. Obamacare acronym

7. Weeps

8. Hip bone

9. Vermilion

10. County not too far up the road

11. Soon, in poetry

12. Adhesive

13. Class

21. Outer edge

25. Mr. Sconyers

27. Element #79

28. McCormick County town

29. Throat dangler

30. Clock pointers

31. Compact

33. Opposite of nine?

34. Follows orders

35. Lymph structures

38. Wine grape variety

41. Post _____

42. Renounce or reject

48. Mr. Davis of Augusta

50. World’s largest desert

51. Eisenhower’s nickname

52. Class of drugs that includes aspirin

54. Dog-______

56. Diplomacy

57. At any time

58. Helper

60. Skeleton piece

62. Stead

63. Affectedly dainty (British)

64. Rose fruit

67. Dad’s partner

DIRECTIONS: Recreate a timeless nugget of wisdom by using the letters in each vertical column to fill the boxes above them. Once any letter is used, cross it out in the lower half of the puzzle. Letters may be used only once. Black squares indicate spaces between words, and words may extend onto a second line. Solution on page 14.

Use the letters provided at bottom to create words to solve the puzzle above. All the listed letters following #1 are the first letters of the various words; the letters following #2 are the second letters of each word, and so on. Try solving words with letter clues or numbers with minimal choices listed. A sample is shown. Solution on page 14.

The Exam
iners
AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 12
Click on “MYSTERY WORD” • DEADLINE TO ENTER: NOON, JUNE 2, 2024 + +
NUMBER BY SAMPLE: 1 2 3 4 1 2 1 2 3 4 5 LOVE BLIND IS 1. ILB 2. SLO 3. VI 4. NE 5. D = by Daniel R. Pearson © 2024 All rights reserved. Solution p. 14
WORDS
by Daniel R. Pearson © 2024 All rights reserved. E
QUOTATIONPUZZLE
U
by Daniel R. Pearson © 2024 All rights reserved © 2024 Daniel Pearson All rights reserved.
EXAMINER
by Daniel R. Pearson © 2023 All rights reserved
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 I E R D L R K A T N E E A B S B W F L A W S S P R R E F P T P R U L I A E U J E L H S C W N E M Y I — Anonymous 1. BIWIWIMIMLLDNT 2. EEEEETTHHHOO 3. CAAVEEESS 4. DTTEENNAS 5. RUST 6. VS 7. EE L D D 1 2 3 4 T ’ E 1 2 3 4 5 L C 1 2 3 4 1 2 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 1 2 3 4 1 2 1 2 3 4 5 1 1 2 1 2 3 4 8 6 3 9 5 1 4 7 4 3 2 8 6 4 2 7 4 3 2 8 7 6 9 5 9 1 8 7 9 6 2 5 2 4 1 7 3 8 3 5 6 1 9 4 1 9 4 5 6 3 6 8 3 9 7 2 5 2 7 4 8 1 4 3 2 8 1 7 9 1 8 3 5 6 7 6 5 2 4 9

BTHEBESTMEDICINE

ack in the Sixties a guy from Atlanta was cruising at high speed down a Georgia back road when he crested a hill and hit two hitchhiking hippies.

One flew 50 feet off the road and into a field, the other smashed through the windshield and ending up in the back seat.

The redneck sheriff showed up and the very nervous city guy asked the sheriff what the charges were going to be.

After the sheriff surveyed the scene, and considering that the man hit two long-haired hippies, he turned to the driver and said, “Well son, we’ll charge the first one with leaving the scene of an accident and the second one with breaking and entering.”

A parenting class was held for couples having their second child. The instructor discussed the issue of how to break the news to the first child, and offered this warning: “Some parents tell their child, ‘We love you so much we decided to have another child just like you.’ But think about that for a minute. Ladies, what if your husband came home one day and said, ‘Honey, I love you so much I decided to bring

home another wife.’”

One of the women spoke up immediately. “Does she cook?”

Paramedic: How would you rate your pain on a scale of 1 to 10?

Patient: Zero stars. Would not recommend.

Moe: Joe, you’ve got to stop fighting with people. Not every problem can be solved with a fist.

Joe: I know. That’s why we have two.

Moe: I was cheated on five times. So I cheated Joe: Why?

Moe: To get even.

Moe: My new girlfriend thinks I’m a stalker. Joe: I haven’t seen you two together

Moe: Well, she’s not actually my girlfriend. Not yet.

Moe: How are you and your girlfriend doing with your long-distance relationship?

Joe: If you make one more joke about that restraining order...you’re going to need one too.

Moe: How are you and your new girlfriend getting along?

Joe: Not good. She’s been giving me the silent treatment.

Moe: Joe, for the last time, you told me she’s a mime!

Moe: When the handyman had to make repairs at the French bakery, what tool did he use?

Joe: Probably a croissant wrench.

Staring at my phone all day has certainly had no Effect on ME!

you live beyond the Aiken-Augusta

hate

NAME

or

when that happens? — we’ll command your mail carrier to bring every issue to your house!

Choose six months for $24 or one year for $42 . Mail this completed form with payment to Augusta Medical Examiner, PO Box 397, Augusta GA 30903- 0397

Dear Advice Doctor,

The Advice Doctor

My parents were the greatest. They are in their late 70s now, but all these many decades beyond my childhood, my appreciation for the way they raised me continues to grow almost by the day. I regularly find myself in situations where the wisdom they taught me is still ringing in my ears as though they just told me yesterday, guiding me to make good decisions in my career and my family life. I feel sorry for many of the kids these days and the way they are raised.

— Thanks, Mom & Dad

Dear Thanks,

Thank you for sharing this very timely issue, one that should not be ignored — as if anyone could! Persistent ringing in the ears is practically impossible to ignore. It can cause a lot of stress and anxiety and seriously interfere with everyday living.

The medical term for “ringing” in the ears that has no extermal cause is tinnitus. There are two acceptable pronunciations, but the one I prefer is tih-NITE-us. The ringing might sound more like buzzing, roaring, whistling, hissing or something else, and might be in just one ear (have that checked) or in both. It’s usually internal: in most cases no one can hear it but you.

There are various causes, some known, some unknown. Did you just leave a loud concert or spend an hour with a chainsaw and no hearing protection? You may have tinnitus for a short time. Some medications can cause tinnitus, but in most cases the ringing disappears when the medicine does. Some people say their tinnitus is worst at night when the noise of the day is gone and any ringing is most noticeable. It’s often an issue as we get older, since our vascular system can become less flexible as the years go by, meaning that blood rushing through our ears makes more noise than it used to.

When there is no obvious cause, and when the ringing is disruptive or has been happening for as long as six months, it’s time to have things checked out by a doctor to see if a specific cause can be found and treated.

Sometimes tinnitus is accompanied by hearing loss, so it isn’t something to ignore if it continues. But don’t stress: tinnitus isn’t dangerous. But it is something to have checked out if it has been ongoing.

I hope this answers your question. Thanks for writing!

Do you have a question for The Advice Doctor about health, life, love, personal relationships, career, raising children, or any other important topic? Send it to News@AugustaRx.com. Replies will be provided only in the Examiner.

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 13 ha... ha...
+ By
we’re
of our readers.
popular demand
making at-cost subscriptions available for the convenience
If
area,
miss issues between doctor’s appointments — don’t you
it
ADDRESS CITY
STATE ZIP
+ SUBSCRIBE TO THE MEDICALEXAMINER + Because try
might, no one can stare at their phone all day.
as they
Why subscribe to the MEDICALEXAMINER?
© + +
Why read the Medical Examiner: Reason #192 BEFORE READING AFTER READING

THE MYSTERY SOLVED

The

...cleverly hidden on the kid’s sweater in the p. 8 ad for MEDICAL ASSOCIATES PLUS THE WINNER: TERRY SHIBLEY! If that’s your name, congratulations! Send us your mailing address using the email address in the box on page 3. The new Mystery Word is on page 12. Start looking!

The Celebrated MYSTERY WORD CONTEST

...wherein we hide (with fiendish cleverness) a simple word. All you have to do is unscramble the word (found on page 12), then find it concealed within one of our ads. Click in to the contest link at www.AugustaRx.com and enter. If we pick you in our random drawing of correct entries, you’ll score our goodie package!

SEVEN SIMPLE RULES: 1. Unscramble and find the designated word hidden within one of the ads in this issue. 2. Visit the Reader Contests page at www.AugustaRx.com. 3. Tell us what you found and where you found it. 4. If you’re right and you’re the one we pick at random, you win. (Winners within the past six months are ineligible.) 5. Prizes awarded to winners may vary from issue to issue. Limited sizes are available for shirt prize. 6. A photo ID may be required to claim some prizes. 7. Other entrants may win a lesser prize at the sole discretion of the publisher. 8. Deadline to enter is shown on page 12.

PROFESSIONAL DIRECTORY

Dr. Eric Sherrell, DACM, LAC

Augusta Acupuncture Clinic 4141 Columbia Road

706-888-0707 www.AcuClinicGA.com

Evans Chiropractic Health Center Dr. William M.

Wheeler Rd, Suite 365

30909 706-432-6866 www.visitrcp.com

Karen L. Carter, MD 1303 D’Antignac St, Suite 2100 Augusta 30901 706-396-0600 www.augustadevelopmentalspecialists.com

AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 14
Mystery Word in our last issue was: KITCHEN + READ EVERY ISSUE ONLINE WWW.ISSUU.COM/ MEDICALEXAMINER Thank you for supporting our advertisers! Thank you for supporting our advertisers! CHIROPRACTIC
DEVELOPMENTAL PEDIATRICS COUNSELING
Rice 108 SRP Drive, Suite A 706-860-4001 www.evanschiro.net DERMATOLOGY Georgia Dermatology & Skin Cancer Center 2283 Wrightsboro Rd. (at Johns Road) Augusta 30904 706-733-3373 www.GaDerm.com SKIN CANCER CENTER Resolution
Professionals Steppingstones to Recovery 2610
Augusta 30909 706-733-1935 DRUG REHAB Parks Pharmacy 437 Georgia Ave. N. Augusta 29841 803-279-7450
PHARMACY P ARKS HARMACY DENTISTRY Jason H. Lee, DMD 116 Davis Road Augusta 30907 706-860-4048 Steven
Wilson, DMD Floss ‘em or lose ‘em! ACUPUNCTURE
Counseling
Commons Blvd.
www.parkspharmacy.com
L.
LONG TERM CARE WOODY MERRY www.woodymerry.com Long-Term Care Planning I CAN HELP! (706) 733-3190 • 733-5525 (fax) Zena Home Care Personal Care|Skilled Nursing|Companion 706-426-5967 www.zenahomecare.com IN-HOME CARE Everyday Elder Care LLC Certified Home Health/Caregiver 706-231-7001 everydayeldercare.com Sleep Institute of Augusta SLEEP MEDICINE Bashir Chaudhary, MD 3685 Wheeler Rd, Suite 101 Augusta 30909 706-868-8555 +
3633
Augusta
EMF Safe Homes Sheila Reavill Certified Building Biology Specialist 209-625-8382 (landline) SURVEY•ASSESSMENT•REMEDIATION EMF PROTECTION Augusta Area Healthcare Provider 4321 CSRA Boulevard Augusta 30901 706-555-1234 CALL 706.860.5455 TODAY! YOUR LISTING YOUR LISTING HERE Your Practice And up to four additional lines of your choosing and, if desired, your logo. Keep your contact information in this convenient place seen by thousands of patients every month. Call (706) 860-5455 for all the details! CALL THE MEDICAL EXAMINER (706-860-5455) TO BE LISTED HERE 3K BODY CONTOUR (NON-SURGICAL) WEIGHT LOSS/DETOX BYE BYE BELLY • Detox Juice/Tea 233 Davis Road Suite H Augusta GA 30907 706-403-7536 Family Dentistry 4059 Columbia Road Martinez 30907 706-863-9445 + TheSUDOKUsolution SEE PAGE 12 THE PUZZLE SOLVED Quotation QUOTATION PUZZLE SOLUTION: Life was simpler when apple and blackberry were just fruits. — Anonymous WORDS BY NUMBER Love me when I least deserve it because that’s when I need it most. — Swedish proverb L E A P B A S I C W A G T I T C H E C O L I I N L Y P U M A C A B I N L O U P S I E R R A S U N K N E E M I L L M A G E M U H A M M A D B O S T O N O V A R E G A L H B O D U N B A R N A R D R E D O L D A B Y S M E Y E C A S H I N E A S I N E S S A L E E Y A K S T E A R G A B H E A L T H A V I D A R O M A I I W I C E D I T E N O R D E E P T R E E E D E M A S U E S 9 5 9 1 8 7 9 6 2 5 1 4 3 2 4 1 7 3 8 6 5 9 3 5 6 1 9 4 7 2 8 1 9 4 5 6 3 2 8 7 6 8 3 9 7 2 5 1 4 5 2 7 4 8 1 3 9 6 4 3 2 8 1 7 9 6 5 9 1 8 3 5 6 4 7 2 7 6 5 2 4 9 8 3 1
Stanley A. Cooper NOTARY • LOAN SIGNING AGENT Have Notary Will Travel AVAILABLE 24/7 706.535.8484 scoopu48@gmail.com AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER 15 + ROLLED SANDWICHES • SOUPS • SALADS 3626 Walton Way Extension (Walton’s Corner) Phone: 706.736.1099 Fax: 706.736.4401 OrderRolyPoly.com THINK INSIDE THE WRAP MAY 17, 2024 Our advertisers make this free newspaper possible. Please thank them with your business and patronage. FREE! OUR NEXT ISSUE DATE: JUNE 7 2024 Free estimates! Call us today at 706-828-1919 WINDOW CLEANING • PRESSURE WASHING WINDOW CLEANING • PRESSURE WASHING Free estimates! Call us today at 706-828-1919 526 Georgia Avenue • North Augusta • 803.441.0144 ART & FRAME Custom Framing Custom Mirrors Art Installation Reframing www.facebook.com/ AugustaRx your IT WAS FUN FOR A WHILE Ready to get your life back? Steppingstones to Recovery 2610 Commons Blvd. Augusta GA 30909 706-733-1935
AUGUSTAMEDICALEXAMiNER MAY 17, 2024 16 + AIYAN DIABETES CENTER AIYAN DIABETES CENTER 462 FURYS FERRY RD • AUGUSTA, GA 30907 (706) 868-0319 • AIYANDIABETES.COM FAX: (706) 868-3719 ENDOCRINOLOGY DIVISION Call 706-868-0319 for SAME DAY appointments
David LaChance, DO
DIABETIC RETINOPATHY DIVISION
Guillermo Gallardo, MD Ophthalmologist and Retina Specialist Paul Butros, MD Salman Mufti, MD Thomas Wehmann, DO Vascular Surgeon
ENDOVASCULAR & WOUND CARE DIVISION
Alain Domkam, MD Vascular Surgeon
PODIATRY DIVISION Diabetic Neuropathy Treatment
Harold Coleman, DPM Podiatrist, Foot & Ankle, Heel Pain Chanelle Duchaussee, DPM Janaki Nadarajah, DPM Wound Care Specialist Leg Pain, P.A.D. Risha Malik, MD Komal Quershi, MD

Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.