GKT HOCKEY CLUB ALUMNI NEWSLETTER December 2010
FOREWORD Mark Pendrey, Alumni Officer
As the inaugural Alumni Officer (rumours of me creating the position as last year’s club captain for myself are completely unfounded) allow me to welcome gentlemen to the first ever GKT Hockey Club Alumni Newsletter. The aim of all of this is to let you know what’s going on with the GKT teams with reports from the respective team captains, updates from the social secretary on the freshers’ trials and tour as well as other goings on within the club as a whole. However, one of the most important pieces of news contained within this newsletter comes within this next couple of paragraphs and this is regarding the President’s Match. Last year, with help from Sam Heaton, we managed to get a full day of hockey shenanigans arranged and we hope to continue this in the coming years. Like last year, we plan to do this the day after AGM which this year is pencilled in for Friday 18 th March (it’s early due to NAMS and The Royal Wedding – how inconsiderate of them) so the President’s Match will be the following day. With regards to AGM itself, more details will be made available nearer the time but old boys’ tickets will be very limited due to the restriction on numbers we have and it is only fair that current members get priority. With fair warning, I hope to see as many of you there this year as we managed to get along last year and hopefully the hangovers won’t impede the current students giving the old boys a bit more of a run for their money this year.
A Message from the Club Captain Kaanthan Jawahar, Club Captain Greetings all. I hope this newsletter finds you well. It’s about time we made our alumni newsletter official and I for one am very excited as we have so much to tell you! Just halfway through the season and so much has happened. New traditions have been made, old traditions have been rigorously enforced and even a new tour has been adopted into our calendar. Have a read and let us know what you think. Contacting me is easy. Send me an email at kclms.mhc@gmail.com and I will get back to you ASAP. I also urge you to check out the facebook group (search “GKT Hockey Club”) as well as our website: http://www.kclmshockey.wordpress.com A big thanks goes out to all the contributors to this newsletter. I hope it grows in the years to come. We are still in the process of compiling our alumni database so please forward this on to any other alumni you may come across. I have very much enjoyed my year so far as club captain. Highlights so far include beating KCL 2s on penalty flicks, with their pained expressions as Shin Kim sealed the win in the top left hand corner literally made my year. Also the tosser nominations have been monumental. And the majority of them feature in the resurrected GKT Bar. You can find them all on the MedSoc website: http://www.kclmedsoc.org GKT Hockey is more than just a club. We create the leaders at Guy’s, we are Guy’s Bar and we are special. GKT till I die? It goes far beyond that.
Honor Oak Park Kaanthan Jawahar, Club Captain
For those of you that have not heard, GKT Hockey returned to HOP last season. KCL finally realised that paying thousands to hire out the ghetto that is Kennington Park Astro was not the smartest move. They redeveloped HOP and now we have two Astros. Hurrah! They did run out of money though and so we currently have ‘high quality’ porta-cabins for changing rooms and drinking facilities. Nevertheless, it is a truly magical place. What’s more is that the new pavilion will be built from February 2011. The plans look impressive. And with GKT Hockey resident, it will be the place to be. One down side though. As it is a KCL ground, KCL Hockey also play here. But their lack of banter, misplaced arrogance and generally disappointing personalities mean that they feature in a very small way (if at all) at HOP. And we also put their 2s out the cup on penalty flicks. BOOM!
The Merger Kaanthan Jawahar, Club Captain
After years of collaborating with GKT Women’s Hockey on the social side and in the mixed team, it has finally happened. GKT Men’s Hockey and GKT Women’s Hockey are now one and the same. What does this mean in real terms though? Well we are now one of the biggest sports clubs at King’s College London. We put out 7 competitive sides in ULU, UH and BUCS (formerly known as BUSA), as well as our ever more active mixed team who are campaigning for ULU to introduce a mixed league. Our socials are now even bigger (if that’s possible), embarking on at least 2 tours per season, the iconic Xmas Dinners and AGMs as well as dominating Guy’s Bar each and every Wednesday night. We have made ourselves an indispensible part of life at Guy’s. It’s a special thing and I for one am honoured to be a part of it.
Logistically, we still operate two committees per se, simply due to the sheer size of the club (100+ members). However, though we operate as two committees, we are essentially one super committee with common goals and so far (touch wood) we are achieving them.
We have made Honor Oak Park our home away from Guy’s. Many a social take place in the portacabins on site (they are actually quite nice) and these are soon to be replaced with a shiny new pavilion, which clearly won’t stay shiny for long. The merger has made this transition from Kennington even easier and things look bright for the future of GKT Hockey Club.
PS. King’s College London changed GKT’s name to KCLMS (King’s College London School of Medicine and Dentistry), as such on official correspondences we must call ourselves KCLMS Hockey. The reason behind this was the research community had trouble attributing GKT to KCL. Who cares? We are GKT (or UMDS for the older amongst you). And that is how it will stay.
Freshers’ Trials Joe Keighley, Social Secretary Wednesday 29th September was the date etched into the minds of all associated with GKT Hockey Club; it was of course time for Fresher’s Trials 2010. My instructions from the top were to ‘socialise the shit out of the day’ and, as such, I spent the morning (and £50) in the pound shop and lots more in the juniper aisle of Elephant & Castle Tescos. Other supermarkets are of course available. As always the afternoon’s entertainment commenced with a little session of chaotic hockey, as shambolic as the coalition government, to give us older chaps some time to find a location for the revelry and to fend off the advances of any overly keen rugby boys. Following an appalling display from the freshers in the P-Flick challenge they all received their first proper ginning and the scene was set for what lay ahead. We progressed to our table and began the introductions. As always one unwise fresher thought it clever to whip-out the old “I love gin” chat... 8 shots later he had quietened down. The other introduction of note came from Fresher SJ, or to give him his proper title: Token *The events which followed are currently under investigation by the GMC fitness to practice board so shall not be discussed further here+. The HOP merriment was brought to a finish with the now traditional assault course incorporating the usual nudity and degradation but with the novel addition of bobbing for apples. In gin. A delight for all involved. I will bring this account to a conclusion with my personal highlight of the day. Upon returning to Guy’s Bar the Men’s Hockey Club reclaimed their rightful crown as the best social team at GKT with many rousing renditions of drinking games and songs alike. Socialise the shit out of the day? Done.
T.I.T.S Callum Baxter, Hockey Girl Liaison Services
It was the afternoon of Saturday 6th November that 16 pioneers from GKT Hockey Club set out to Southampton where a new adventure awaited us: Tournament In The South (TITS) 2010. Surprisingly, we were one of the first teams to arrive and so promptly set about making new friends. Methods for this included loudly laying into the people watching rugby in the SU Bar, making casual conversation in the toilets and, of course, introducing anyone and everyone to Flabongo. What followed was the classic Curry then night out combo, ending up at a little club called “Jesters” which exceeded expectations and somehow was indeed dirtier and sweatier than Belushi’s. Astounding. After a morning of recovery and gossip, the hockey part of TITs began… Coming up against opposition including the Home team and Peninsula we had to pull out some great hockey, and our results from the group stages were – W1 D2 L1. However, one of our Tour Freshers got confused when relaying a result to the organiser and it was recorded that our 1-0 loss was actually a 1-0 victory. This then meant that we were put into the Cup competition with all the “Big Teams”. We managed to get knocked out sharpish by a rather rapid Cardiff team, but with a great defensive display our defeat was only by 1-0. Not to be disheartened, we watched the rest of the day’s hockey and, at one point, got involved in the biggest pile-on ever witnessed. After some teary goodbyes from the ladyfolk of Southampton, we headed back to London where for the more hardy of the group, the weekend officially ended at the Dover Castle. All-in-all, it was a great success: Bring on TITS 2011!
A New Tradition? Flabongo Joe Keighley, Social Secretary
Fresh off the heels of winning Playboy Magazine’s coveted ‘Best Drinking Innovation’ award 2010 is a brand new tradition here at the worst hockey club in the world... the Flabongo. Don’t let its harmless exterior lull you into a false sense of security, this bird is lethal (especially when filled with gin, as yours truly discovered when turning 20-22). The Flabongo’s curvaceous body can hold just under 2 pints of any beverage you choose to fill it with, which are then dispensed via the medium of its elongated neck and delicate mouth. As with all traditions, they must be observed properly and with respect. To ensure that you are never caught out I will now talk you through the perfect Flabongo-ing:
Social Secretary carrying Flabongo surveys Guy’s Bar Social Secretary sees Fresher with pitcher Social Secretary approaches Fresher and empties large quantity of said pitcher into the Flabongo, before returning the snakebite to its owner in a new and exciting container. (The beauty of the Flabongo is that the recipient need not have done anything particularly good, bad or anything. If you are handed a full Flabongo it is your duty to empty it) A countdown is initiated *crowd involvement encouraged+: 3... 2... 1... FLABONGO Upon the completion of this countdown the recipient must stand on one leg (a la flamingo) and finish the delicious elixir in his hands When this is finished he (remaining on one leg) puts the empty Flabongo atop his head and echoes the shouts of his audience... FLABONGO
(An honourable mention to Mr Hew Torrance for providing us with this beautiful item)
I ♥ TOUR! Liverpool Joe Keighley, Social Secretary GKT Hockey Tour 2010 was, as always, another highlight of the calendar. This year we ventured up North, to a land where everything is cheap and the vods are quad; it could only be Liverpool. With the fancy dress theme decided as ‘Under The Sea’ we met in Guy’s Bar at lunchtime on Friday 26th November. There were some excellent efforts on display (Callum Baxter’s jellyfish was particularly enjoyable) and some less so, while the Fresher’s had been instructed to arrive simply in beachwear (further honourable mentions to Dan Cromb and Roy Wheeler are due here Speedos are always a good shout). Then followed an epic journey, both in duration and alcohol consumption. To be honest I don’t remember much of this so shall move swiftly on. Upon arrival we went for the standard all-youcan-eat followed by inebriation - both were successful. After enjoying some delicious £1 shots we found ourselves in ‘The Raz’. After experiencing Belushi’s and then Jester’s (see T.I.T.S. report) I thought nothing could surprise me. The combination of pungent smell and sweat dripping from the ceiling soon changed my mind. As is apparently the norm for a hockey tour, we had organised no hockey. Instead we decided that (after the gin patrol had awoken the Freshers from their slumber) Saturday was the perfect day to go on a boat tour of the River Mersey before settling in a pub to prepare ourselves for the evening. The evening itself included horrendous amounts of vodka, whether deliciously flavoured or served in a foursome with an alcopop, and again ended up in us being ejected from The Raz in the early hours. Sunday morning truly was one to remember. You really can’t visit the European city of culture without going to a museum, so we did, proving that aquariums really are the finest cure for a hangover. We then headed, once again, for a pub where we stocked up on supplies before another debaucherous journey home culminating in one of the most hideous ginnings ever and a photograph of us all nakedly straddling some Boris Bikes outside the Dover Castle. Excellent.
Christmas Dinner! Kaanthan Jawahar, Club Captain The annual GKT Christmas Dinner served a higher purpose this year. The weather conditions intervened this term, meaning we had to postpone many games. As such, November somewhat disbanded the Hockey Club. We still maintained a presence in Guy’s Bar, but HOP and the hockey itself were sorely missed. That was all soon forgotten as on Wednesday 8th December, GKT Hockey hit back hard and rewrote the rule book on fancy dress at the Kennington Roebuck. The 3s came as bananas in pyjamas. A very surreal thing to see I assure you. The 1s, a traditionally more ‘reserved’ side, certainly impressed. In a move that saw Heath Ledger’s Joker meet Ronald McDonald, passengers on London’s public transport were certainly intrigued. But this pales in comparison to the 2s. Picture 17 flamingos taking over the upper deck of a (rather full) bus at Elephant & Castle and you will start to see what I mean. In conclusion, the fancy dress was, for lack of a better word, astonishing. I applaud the gentlemen of the Hockey Club. The night was a rousing success. The Roebuck holds a special place for the older members of the club and we want to make sure the younger members are aware of our previous roots at Kennington. The food was ace, the drinks were flowing, flabongos and ginnings were everywhere and the karaoke was memorable (not that I remember much of the night). VomTV featured Greg Nussbaum as he fell foul of the N-Money 9 Shot Nightmare (a tradition created by Nick ‘NMoney” Marsden to give 9 single juniper shots to Greg Nussbaum each year—I’m not sure if this actually qualifies as a tradition but it’s hilarious nonetheless). A memorable evening indeed. Massive thanks are due to the social secretaries (Joe, Jet & Kate) for organising a suitably festive shindig.
1st XI Report Jay Pachchigar, 1st XI Captain
With over 20 freshers attending hockey trials, our hunt for more players was looking hopeful. However, as half of them had never played hockey before or had just come along for the social, our hopefulness was short lived. With a squad of 12 players, the season started off well. Convincing victories against Kent and our 2’s led the way, yet with 3 weeks between them, and at least 2 weeks between all our other matches, we simply weren’t playing enough games. Our inevitable long list of Sunday matches started against RUMS 1’s in the ULU cup. With all due respect to our previous oppositions, we would now have to step up our game. Luckily we did just that. Our ability to finally score some goals showed and we won 4 -2. For our match against Portsmouth 3’s in Bucs Cup, we called up Joe ‘The Goal Machine’ Keighley, and he definitely lived up to his name scoring 2 of our 3 goals and consequently grabbing the man of the match award. 3 weeks later was the show down of the season….KCL 1’s. Our lack of matches and training meant nothing here. Pride was at stake. With them being 2 leagues above us, we had a point to prove. With us playing some of the best hockey we’ve played all season, a 1 – 1 score line does seem a little disappointing. But with that being the 5th match we’ve played, I was happy with the result. All in all, a goal difference of +24 is always nice. Lets hope we can maintain that for the next half of the season.
2nd XI Report Shinwoo Kim, 2nd XI Captain
After another unprecedented fresher intake, we formed a 2nd XI like never before. With our 20 man squad of regulars, the same team has never been played twice. Overall, a total of 25 players have participated to varying degrees of success, including a cameo appearance from the rugby club captain. We've had a few wins, a few losses and one amazing draw. Overall, an impressive level of hockey has been displayed, considering our recent promotion. Our highlights include an 11-2 win and a 50 loss. The 2s have maintained their reputation as the social kings of GKT Hockey. The calibre of fancy dress has been astonishing (immortalised on the flabongo website—see Christmas Dinner article) and looks set to continue for the foreseeable future.
3rd XI Report Saarth Shiralkar, 3rd XI Captain
After a successful 09/10 season with the 3s where we narrowly missed out on promotion in both ULU and BUCS, we were hoping for another successful season this time out. Things haven’t really gone to plan and the results (5 losses and a win via a walkover) don’t exactly make for happy reading. In our defence we lost some key players over the summer and the fixture list hasn’t been favourable. This has resulted in a pretty embarrassing goal difference, although the largely inexperienced squad has battled valiantly against much stronger opposition. Ironically our better performances have come in the matches where we have been battered by more experienced and skilful teams and we have been frustratingly wasteful against the teams we should have beaten easily. On a positive note, we are still in the ULU Cup and can still finish in a respectable position in the ULU League. The team is starting to gel together and play some good hockey so I’m quite confident that we can perform much better in the second half of the season.
Mixed Hockey Report Theo Muth, Mixed Captain The mixed team at GKT is known for being one of the more established mixed teams in the area. Whilst pushing for a mixed league for London teams, we have always enjoyed playing relaxed but competitive matches on a Sunday. The team came together for our first match against The Strollers earlier in the season, confidently beating them 10-1. Unfortunately, due to a series of cancellations and a questionable ‘all-weather’ pitch at HOP we have not been able to push out any more matches, and had to postpone a couple of matches until next term. With a lot of matches set up for next term, a successful first tour to T.I.T.S and a much-anticipated tour to NAMS, we look forward to furthering the club’s reputation of a strong mixed team and, of course, furthering relations with the ladies of GKT Hockey.
Contact Info Club Email: kclms.mhc@gmail.com
Club Website: http://www.kclmshockey.wordpress.com
Club Facebook Group: Search “GKT Hockey Club”
Club Group Spaces Group: http://www.groupspaces.com/KCLMSHockeyClub
Men’s Committee 2010—2011: Club Captain—Kaanthan Jawahar Treasurer—Mark Shimmings Social Secretary—Joe Keighley Alumni Officer—Mark Pendrey 1st XI Captain—Jay Pachchigar 1st XI Vice Captain—Dan Cromb 2nd XI Captain—Shinwoo Kim 2nd XI Vice Captain—Greg Nussbaum 3rd XI Captain—Saarth Shiralkar 3rd XI Vice Captain—Caolan Roberson Mixed Team Captain—Theo Muth
Epilogue Mark Pendrey, Alumni Officer
I hope that you enjoyed the rest of this little publication and I hope to see as many of you as possible at the President’s Match! I hope the previous pages of this little magazine have been interesting or at least mildly amusing for you to read. As someone now in my final year (at last) it does seem an odd thought that my playing days for GKT are almost at an end, especially after being so heavily involved over the last few years as treasurer, club captain and now alumni officer. This will be especially jarring for me as I head off to take up my foundation post in the Severn Foundation School, finals and OSCEs pending of course (see you in Taunton Karl?). Admittedly, it’s no Aberdeen but still a very abrupt ending to what has been a big part of not just my uni life but my life in general. I’m not one for clinging onto the past and I hope that you don’t see this newsletter in that way but that it at least reminds you of the good times you had in the chapter of your life you spent as part of UMDS/GKT Men’s Hockey Club. As I said in my intro, I hope to see as many of you at the President’s Match as possible as I play as a student one last time!