CY Family Mag #199

SEPTEMBER 2015

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Message From the Publisher Hi Everybody, In my almost 30 years of publishing this magazine, we have never featured a front cover like the one we have on this issue. No picture! No new CD! No smiling performer! Only the stark headline proclaiming the tragic death of a Jewish girl. As you read the heartbreaking details inside you will understand the full depth of this tragedy and how, together with the help of Yad L’Achim, we can hopefully avoid similar misfortunes in the future.

As the carefree echoes of summer recede into that section of our psyches called “fond memories,” only to be replaced by the shock and awe of the impending High Holidays, we are also, at the same time, facing a fateful vote in congress on the nuclear deal with Iran.

As of this writing it seems the President has enough votes to override a veto and thus assure passage of this highly problematic deal. We feature a variety of well-respected Jewish thinkers and analysts including R’ Berel Wein, Jonathan Rosenblum, Y.Y. Jacobson and others to give us their take on this existential threat to Israel and the global ramifications to America, its interests and its very security!

But if you can get past these ponderous and weighty issues, there are still some things in life that are light,

bright and enjoyable. Unfortunately, I can’t think of any! Just kidding.

To inspire you and help lift your sagging spirits, we feature a beautiful story of Hashgacha Prutis that will restore your faith in humanity. Notwithstanding President Obama’s nuclear deal with Iran, which many consider a really dumb mistake, Rabbi Bentzion Shafier continues his popular “The Shmuz” column with 10 Really Dumb Mistakes that Very Smart Couples Make. Don’t miss his take on Mistake #3! He might just be talking about YOUR case!

In “A Pound of Cure,” R’ Yaakov Horowitz reflects on some very hard questions. His sage analysis and advice will comfort and resonate with you.

And just when we’ve succeeded in calming you down and lowering your blood pressure, our YWN Coffee Room percolates with a Boro Park Extra Bold Dark Roast question that’s guaranteed to get your blood boiling once again: How do I pay for my kid’s wedding?

But not to worry, Der Eibershter vet helfen!

Wishing all a k’siva v’chasima tova.

Your friend,

Country Yossi

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SEPTEMBER 2015

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ISSUE 199

“New York’s Premier Jewish Magazine”

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“Wherever you go, there you are - your luggage is another story!” – CY September 2015 /

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Table of Contents

Volume 28 Number 3

SPOTLIGHT • Easy Flow: Little One’s Serenity, Mother’s Best Remedy, by Chaya Sara Schlussel. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26 • Avi’s Rent-a-Car, by Chaya Sara Schlussel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34 COVER STORY • Yad L’Achim - The Death of a Jewish Girl . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26 LET’S SHMOOZE ...................................................................................................................................................................................37 OPINION • The Sunshine Patriots, by Rabbi Berel Wein . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48 • A Very Bad Deal: Let Us Count the Ways, by Jonathan Rosenblum . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50

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SOUND OFF • I Also Trust Iran, by Rabbi Y.Y. Jacobson. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52 INSPIRATION.........................................................................................................................................................................................54 TORAH • The Short Vort: His Name Was Dov Ber, by Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60 • Ki Savo, by Rabbi Berel Wein. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 61 • An Elul Primer, by Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62 TIMELINE ................................................................................................................................................................................................64 REAL LIFE

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• A Must-Read Story of Hashgacha . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66 • The Hebron Massacre . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72 HEALTH AND ADVICE • Dear Bubby . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76 • Mistake #3: It’s Respect First, Love Second, by Rabbi Bentzion Shafier . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77 • A Pound of Cure, by Rabbi Yakov Horowitz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 78 ISRAEL • MVP Award, by Dov Shurin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 84 CONTROVERSY • YWN Coffee Room: How Do You Pay for Your Child’s Wedding? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 86

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JEWISH BOOKS • Top 10 in Jewish Books . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 89 JEWISH MUSIC • Top 3 in Jewish Music . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 92 • CY Songbook: Havdallah . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 95 HUMOR • Zoology: Boro Park Style, by Chaptzem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 96 • Can’t You Just Plotz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99 • Home Sweet Home, by Kayla Kuchleffel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 101

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COUNTRY YOSSI FAMILY MAGAZINE • 1310 48th Street, Suite 308 • Brooklyn, New York 11219 Telephone: (718) 851-2010 • Email Address: country@countryyossi.com COPYRIGHT © 2015 - Country Yossi Family Magazine, Inc. All rights reserved. Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for unsolicited submissions. Unsolicited manuscripts, photographs, and other submitted materials must be accompanied by a stamped self-addressed envelope. We reserve the right to print all letters in part or in full unless specifically requested otherwise. No articles, photographs, artwork or other material in this magazine may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever, without prior written permission of the publisher. Country Yossi Family Magazine will not be responsible for typographical errors or advertisers’ claims.

Cover Design: R.A. Stone

website: www.countryyossi.com Follow countryyossi on Twitter

Interior Layout: H. Walfish

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S P O T L I G H T

EASY-FLOW: LITTLE ONE’S SERENITY, MOTHER’S BEST REMEDY

BY CHAYA SARA SCHLUSSEL

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t’s 2:20am. Two weeks ago at this time, I was pacing the floor of my living room, wearing my rug threadbare as I trudged back and forth with my eyes drooping in sleep-deprivation. In my arms was my chronically screaming infant daughter. I patted her, sang to her and begged her to calm down.

She just continued howling. It was almost 4am by the time we both finally succumbed to an exhausted sleep. That was the routine I had been blindly following for more than two months, despairing of ever finding rest, and giving up on the hope of a happy, content baby. I lovingly nursed her, but it was a monumental sacrifice for me, rather than a relaxing exchange between mother and child. I was never sure if she had eaten enough, as she never seemed satisfied. Both my daughter and I were miserable - which is why I will be forever grateful to the friend who finally introduced me to an incredible product called Easy-Flow.

I’m sure my story will sound familiar to many. After my first 2-week stint of insomnia, I seriously contemplated switching from nursing to formula. It just wasn’t working out, and I was ready to quit. But once I learned about the many benefits of mother’s milk, bottle feeding became a far less optimal option for me. Aside from the incomparable bonding experience it creates, breastfeeding stimulates the immune system, protecting against invasive diseases, viruses and cancers - even lowering the risk of Leukemia by 30%. Additionally, nursing has been scientifically proven as an IQ-booster, providing proper nourishment for the brain in its earliest stages. It prevents obesity and eating disorders later on in the baby’s life and significantly lowers baby’s risk of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). With all its natural benefits, nursing was inarguably the superior feeding alternative. So instead of jumping ship,

I set out to find a way, if at all possible, to continue nursing without the crankiness.

I began asking people for advice and soon found that many women shared similar circumstances to mine. Some complained about colic and gassiness in their infants. Others sighed over nursing-induced irritation and soreness. Many were despairing of ever enjoying their “bonding experience.” And then finally, I met my friend Mimi at the park. I casually mentioned that my nursing was not all I had hoped it would be. She nodded knowingly, and then whipped a bottle of Easy-Flow out of her pocketbook. “Easy-Flow,” she confidently asserted, “will change your life. Trust me. Just try it.” I began taking Easy-Flow twice a day, and I’ve never looked back since.

During my 2-month quest for answers, I learned many things about nursing that I’d previously been unaware of. I learned that some women have a low milk supply, which results in an unsatisfied, unhappy baby. Other women have plentiful milk, but still fail to satiate their baby’s hunger due to poor milk consistency, diluted quality, bitter taste or lack of nutrients.

In some cases, mother’s milk cannot travel properly for lack of conduit fluency - and the frustrated baby cannot get enough. At times, superficial sores and skin conditions can cause severe discomfort to the mother both during and after nursing sessions.

Amazingly, the one natural, centuriesold antidote for all of these complications is Easy-Flow. This prize product from Smiling Herbs both enhances and enriches mother’s milk to its greatest advantage. It’s a healthy supplement that provides instantaneous, positive results in many areas of difficulty. Easy-Flow aids smooth movement of the milk by ensuring consistency and conduit clearance. It eliminates irritation by targeting internal infection. It in-

creases baby’s appetite, making nursing sessions longer and more productive. Vital minerals and nutrients give both mother and baby a healthy boost, as mom’s immune system is strengthened and resistance to infection and disease is fortified.

One mother confided that she only began using Easy-Flow after twelve months of nursing, when her milk supply gradually began to decrease. Easy-Flow reversed the decline. With absolutely no side effects, Easy-Flow does not cause any reactions, allergic or otherwise. And best of all, EasyFlow has a soothing effect on babies, targeting pressure points and eliminating headaches, upset stomachs, colic, gassiness, and other causes of stress or interference. It’s a favorite of mothers worldwide, who cannot help but rave about the incredible transformation that Easy-Flow has brought to their nursing sessions.

Recently, this standard herbal supplement was redesigned to contain a high-potency extract that is easy to take, with revolutionary results. The Smiling Herbs Company saw the tremendous need for a product that would aid mothers significantly in their nursing. Using a precise processing system overseen by a highly trained staff of field experts with extensive knowledge of herbal history, Smiling Herbs reintroduced Easy-Flow to their exuberant customer base. The all-natural ingredients are hand-selected for their physical and chemical potential. Now small, easy-to-swallow capsules provide instant relief in manageable dosages. While every mother needs to regulate her own dosage, most people see a definite improvement with just two capsules a day. The feedback that Easy-Flow has received is overwhelmingly positive from their many satisfied clients.

Now it’s 2:25am and the only reason I’m still up is that I had to finish writing this article, letting all the feeding-forlorn mothers out there know about this unparalleled product, so they too can upgrade their nursing from bleary-eyed to beautiful.

Mommies, don’t quit. Take Easy-Flow and get to enjoy the beauty, bounty, and blessing of your baby. Thank you, Smiling Herbs, for the miracle of quiet and contentment that you’ve given me.

Good night!

Smiling Herbs 347-546-2792 smilingherbs@gmail.com

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COVER STORY

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S P O T L I G H T

BY CHAYA SARA SCHLUSSEL

I

f you can visualize driving off to your destination in a perfect set of wheels, you can count on one car rental company to make that vision a reality. No matter what your personal automobile preferences are, Ari Rent-a-Car will put you comfortably and conveniently in the driver’s seat. They’ll make sure your rental experience is worry-free, hasslefree, and totally free of mishaps from beginning to end! With hundreds of makes and models to choose from, all of their vehicles are guaranteed top-of-the-line. The moment you put your key in the ignition, you’ll see what sets Ari apart from the competition.

Ari’s beautiful, multi-lot, state-ofthe-art showroom at 5801 Flatlands Avenue in Brooklyn is chock-full of both new and pre-owned cars, minivans and 17-ft trucks to fit any budget or style.

From Hummers and Beemers to Hyundais and Fords - Ari Rent-a-Car has the ride of your choice. Feel free to browse through their incredible selection. With a variety that vast, it’s no wonder they always have cars available. Whether you’re visiting relatives for Yom Tov, going on a dream vacation or taking the family on a Chol

Hamoed outing, you can steer the car you’ve always wanted, right out of the lot. Run your hand over the sleek contours of a brand new convertible, or test drive a two-year-young Toyota.

Kick the tires, check the mileage, and be assured of seamless, sophisticated quality. The proprietors at Ari’s treat their used cars with the same care and consideration as those hot off the assembly line - and they treat their potential customers with the respect and personal attention that every individual deserves. Best of all, they’re just a short drive away from anywhere in Brooklyn!

A h a r o n Itzkowitz (a.k.a. Ari) has been in the car rental business for fifteen years, so he can boast of significant experience in the industry. His impeccable reputation was built by providing certified, quality vehicles to all his clients - from high-income doctors and lawyers, to eighteen-year-olds with no credit history at all. No good credit? No big deal. While most rental companies will restrict drivers under age 21, at Ari’s, if you have a license you’re welcome to wield the wheel. As far as credit goes, anyone looking for a car from Ari’s will, in all probability, be approved.

You wouldn’t take a lemon from just any guy in a garage. It’s important to research the reliability and past performance of any car dealer before tendering a payment. Thankfully, the profile of Ari’s Rent-a-Car stands up to close scrutiny. They are experts in the field, knowledgeable in every aspect of auto rentals, and can meet any specific request or particular requirement.

Their service is legendary, and the bottom line is this: They can procure the car you want, when you want it, at the price you’re willing or able to pay.

Compact, mid-size or luxury sedans; two-doors, four-doors and four-wheeldrives - you name it, Ari’s got it. Just decide on a color and you’re good to go. You don’t even have to lift the phone to order your new rental vehicle in advance. Ari welcomes same day walk-ins, so you can just stop by and pick up the fully loaded, 2015 or older car of your choice. How’s that for expedient customer service?

Why wait to take your dream car for a spin? Experience the sound of a flawless engine purring to life, as you drive blissfully off into the sunset.

Make your way to Ari Rent-a-Car and in minutes, you could be holding the key to your perfect long or short term rental. With super rates all year round and unbeatable specials for Sukkos, now is the time to get to Ari’s and hit the road!

5801 Flatlands Avenue Brooklyn, NY 11234 718-887-4581/718-872-7134

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A LIFELINE

AS WE GROW OLDER

Dear Country Yossi, While I know your summer issue should be coming out soon, I am writing to you hoping that you will print the enclosed letter in your next edition.

As the letter states, in November 2001 my wife Robin and I were told that our son Jonah, who was then eight years old, had cancer. Our son has since been cured, but Chai Lifeline stood by our side helping both Jonah and us tremendously.

This wonderful organization provided our children with big brothers and a big sister for our daughter, brought us home-cooked meals in the hospital and sent Jonah to Camp Simcha, in the mountains, where he always had a blast.

Chai Lifeline has also provided important emotional support to the entire family, and continues to be a part of our lives. Every year the camp offers 450 kids a chance to forget about illness and just be kids again.

As the father of a child who had cancer, I can never do enough to help the organization.

In November 2014 I had a total knee replacement and I believe if my son could undergo chemotherapy and two surgeries, I can attempt to do the marathon to raise money.

Howard Adelsberg

Dear Country Yossi, As we grow older and hopefully wiser, we slowly realize that when wearing a $300 or

Whether you fly first or economy class, if the plane goes down - you go down with it.

Therefore, when you have mates, buddies and old friends, brothers and sisters who you chat with, laugh with, talk with, sing songs with - that is true happiness!

N.D. Flatbush

FIVE UNDENIABLE FACTS OF LIFE:

$30 watch - they both tell the same time.

Whether we carry a $300 or $30 wallet/handbag - the amount of money inside is the same.

Whether we drink a bottle of $300 or $10 wine - the hangover is the same.

Whether the house we live in is 300 or 3000 sq. ft.- if you live in it on your own, loneliness is still the same.

You will realize, as you grow older, that true inner happiness does not come from the material things of this world.

Dear Country Yossi, The following are some of the best tips for life.

1. Don’t educate your children to be rich. Educate them to be happy. So when they grow up they will know the value of things, not the price.

2. Best awarded words in London - “Eat your food as your medicines. Otherwise you have to eat medicines as your food.”

3. The one who loves you will never leave you because even if there are 100 reasons to give up, he or she will find a reason to hold on.

4. There is a big difference between a human being and being human. Only a few really understand it.

5. You are loved when you are born. You will be loved when you die. In between, you have to manage!

If you just want to walk fast, walk alone. But if you want to walk far, walk together!

J.Y. Monroe, N.Y.

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HASHEM’S CAKE Dear Country Yossi, Sometimes we wonder, “What did I do to deserve this?” or “Why did Hashem have to do this to me?” Here is a wonderful explanation!

A daughter is telling her mother how everything is going wrong, she’s failing algebra and her best friend is moving away.

Meanwhile, her mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack. The daughter says, “Absolutely Mom, I love your cake.”

“Here, have some cooking oil,” her Mother offers.

“Yuck” says her daughter.

“How about a couple of raw eggs?”

“Gross, Mom!” “Would you like some flour then?

Or maybe baking soda?”

“Mom, those are all yucky!”

To which the mother replies: “Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake!

Hashem works the same way.

Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But Hashem knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good!

We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful.

Hashem loves you. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, He’ll listen.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

W.B. Boro Park

SUNSHINE THOUGHTS Dear Country Yossi, I just wanted to share some sunshine with your vast readership to start the New Year.

Answering machine message: “I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life.

Please leave a message after the beep.

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If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes.”

My wife and I had words, but I didn’t get to use mine.

Frustration is trying to find your glasses - without your glasses.

Blessed are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting.

The irony of life is that, by the time you’re old enough to know your way around, you’re not going anywhere.

Hashem made man before woman so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.

I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.

Every morning is the dawn of a new error.

Aspire to inspire before you expire.

R.E. Staten Island

MY FAVORITE DOCTORS Dear Country Yossi, The six best doctors in the world are: 1. Sunlight 2. Rest 3. Exercise 4. Diet 5. Self Confidence and 6. Friends Maintain them at all stages and enjoy a healthy life.

R.P. Boro Park

BEWARE OF PEOPLE BEARING GIFTS Dear Country Yossi, The following is a recounting of an incident from the victim.

Wednesday a week ago, I had a phone call from someone saying he was from some outfit called “Express Couriers.” (The name could be any courier company.) He asked if I’d be home because he had a package for me that required a signature. He said the delivery would arrive in roughly an hour.

Sure enough, about an hour later,

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a uniformed delivery man turned up with a beautiful basket of flowers and a bottle of wine. I was very surprised, since there was no special occasion or holiday, and I certainly wasn’t expecting anything. Intrigued, I inquired who the sender was. The courier replied, “I don’t know, I’m only delivering the package.” Apparently a card was being sent separately… the card has never arrived! There was also a consignment note with the gift.

He explained, because the gift contained alcohol there was a $3.50 “delivery/verification charge,” providing proof he had delivered the package to an adult (of legal drinking age), and not just left it on a doorstep where it could be stolen or taken by anyone, especially a minor.

This sounded logical, and I offered to pay him cash. He said the delivery company required payment by credit or debit card only, so everything is properly accounted for, and to create a legal record of the transaction. He added that couriers don’t carry cash to avoid loss or create likely targets for robbery.

My husband, who by this time was standing beside me, pulled out his credit card. The delivery man had him swipe the card on a small mobile card machine with a small screen and keypad. My husband entered his PIN number and a receipt printed out. He was given a copy of the transaction.

The guy said everything was in order and wished us good day.

To our horrible surprise, between Thursday and the following Monday, $4,000 was charged/withdrawn from our credit/debit account from various ATM machines.

Apparently the “mobile credit card machine” the delivery man carried now had all the info necessary to create a “dummy” card with all our details, including the PIN number.

Upon finding out about the illegal transactions on our card, we immediately notified the bank, which issued us a new card, and our credit/debit account was closed.

We also went to the police, where they confirmed it is definitely a scam because several households had been similarly hit.

WARNING: • Be wary of accepting any “surprise gift or package,” which you neither expected nor personally ordered, especially if it involves any kind of payment as a condition of receiving the gift or package. Also, never accept anything if you do not personally know or there is no proper identification of who the sender is.

• Above all, the only time you should give out any personal credit/debit card information is when you yourself initiated the purchase or transaction!

Pass this on; it may just prevent someone else from being swindled.

T.C. Flatbush

GOOD NEIGHBOR Dear Country Yossi I was at the Home Depot hoping to buy a large planter and flowers for the deck as a surprise for my wife. I had no idea what to get. I did not know

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how large a planter I wanted, how much soil I would need and, most important, which flowers would be a knockout for Mother’s Day. I asked the busy staff a question or two and was pointed this way and that.

Clearly, I was on my own.

As I was selecting a planter (One? Two? Would planters for the railing be better?) a Hasidic guy (I am not Jewish and I live north of 17) came up and asked me a question about plants.

When I explained that I didn’t work there, he started asking me questions about what I was buying.

I asked if he worked there, and he laughed.

“No,” he said, “but I know something about flowers. I can help you make a nice arrangement.”

So he walked around with me, selecting seven nicely compatible plants and some potter’s soil. “Why not get three, just to be safe. Besides, it’s on sale.”

I asked if he had a card. He didn’t.

I woke up at five on Mother’s Day morning, quietly putting my purchases together on the deck. I felt like Santa.

The results were beautiful. The surprise was perfect.

“I didn’t know you had such good taste in flowers,” my wife smiled. I could have taken credit, but I told her the story.

“Well,” she laughed. “Instead of thanking you, I should be thanking him!”

And so I am thanking him. Whoever you are, you make the world a better place.

A good neighbor is a good neighbor - no matter what!

K.J. Walters Monroe

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O P I N I O N

THE SUNSHINE PATRIOTS

BY RABBI BEREL WEIN

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he Jewish communities and individual Jews living in the Diaspora, in the United States and the Western world particularly are currently faced with having to make a difficult and almost fateful decision regarding the signing of an admittedly bad deal with Iran. As this would pave the way for that nation to become a nuclear power in the very foreseeable future, does continued Jewish opposition to the deal contribute to Jewish interests worldwide?

To put the matter more boldly and painfully, is it right and necessary to advocate a Jewish interest over the national policy of governments of nations where Jews are citizens but are only a rather small minority?

There is no question that Iran is not only an enemy of the State of Israel but that it openly and repeatedly declares that its intention is to wipe the Jewish state off the face of the world map. Experience, bitter experience, has taught the Jewish people that we should take these threats at face value.

Enabling Iran, with the blessings of the West, to possess nuclear weapons is an existential threat to the survival of the State of Israel.

Even Thomas Friedman, never noted for his favorable reviews regarding Israel generally and Netanyahu personally, has written that if he were living in Israel he would have just cause for concern over this deal with Iran. So now the moment of test and truth has arisen for American Jewry. Its loyalty to the policies of the United States and especially its blind faith in

President Obama and the Democratic Party is well known and proven over the past electoral cycles.

In the face of the Hobbesian choice now presented before it, American Jewry has split badly. And this split reflects not only policy regarding Iran but reveals the deeper divide that exists within American Jews and the conflicts that this rift engenders.

J Street has been exposed as being the anti-Israel lobby that it always was from its inception. The fact that it is now headed by a Moslem woman only contributes to the comedic façade of it somehow attempting to defend Jewish interests and the State of Israel.

Now it naturally defends the Iranian deal at all costs.

A substantial number of Reform rabbis have written the American Congress to express their support for the Iranian uranium and nuclear deal.

These people have always proven themselves to be socially liberal first and, at best, Jewish second. Reform was a bitter opponent of Zionism until the Six Day War and their DNA still contains vestiges of their great slogan of the nineteenth and early twentieth centuries that “Berlin is our Jerusalem!”

They blithely believe that they are safe and that their fate and future is somehow not tied up with the State of Israel and its welfare and security.

Their own long road of encouraging assimilation, intermarriage and a religion of radical liberalism have brought them to this state of self-deception.

Whatever they do stand for, they do not stand for the Jewish people!

The Orthodox world has its own anti-Jewish detractors. The ferociously anti-Zionist factions within Orthodoxy, while not necessarily espousing support for the Iran deal, proclaim that Jews have no right to publicly oppose the policy of President Obama and the United States government.

The problem with these groups is that the main tenet of their faith is to deny and decry the existence of the State of Israel. They allowed this issue - and this issue solely - to define their society and their behavior. No recital of realistic facts, no empiric observation of the realities of the Jewish world today will change their minds, policies or behavior. They are the ultimate true believers. And their belief in Judaism is somehow obsessively founded on their dismay and disappointment that the Jewish state has arisen and is successful… and will always remain controversial. So they are anti-Israel first and Jewish second.

All of those who are Jewish second, who are sunshine patriots and not willing to stand up for the Jewish people in unpopular circumstances, are always judged harshly in Jewish history.

In 1933, the Orthodox Jewish rabbinate in Germany sent a letter of congratulations to Adolf Hitler when he assumed the post of the Chancellor of Germany.

Reading that letter today, in perfect historic hindsight, makes one weep. But as Lincoln said, “we should not judge lest we be judged.” But there is no question in my mind that Jews throughout the world will be judged by history as to their reaction to this Iranian nuclear deal.

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O P I N I O N

A VERY BAD DEAL: LET US COUNT THE WAYS

BY JONATHAN ROSENBLUM

U

pon the signing of an Agreed Framework with North Korea in 1994, President Bill Clinton addressed the American people and assured them, “This is a good deal for the United States.” He explained that “North Korea [would] freeze and then dismantle its nuclear program” and that “U.S. and international inspectors will carefully monitor to make sure it keeps its commitments.”

Well, we know how well that worked out. Eight years later, North Korea kicked out international inspectors, and in 2006, it tested its first nuclear weapon underground. Wendy Sherman, the State Department policy coordinator for North Korea at the time of the signing of the Agreed Framework, just happens to have been the lead U.S. negotiator in nuclear talks with Iran since late 2013.

But it would be a mistake to make too much of the North Koran precedent. The Iranian deal that the U.S. is poised to sign, as I write, is worse, much worse, in every way than that with North Korea. North Korea at least had to kick out inspectors to go nuclear. The P5+1 agreement with Iran now on the table is so porous that inspections would be nearly useless. After first insisting that inspections would be “robust and intrusive,” anywhere and anytime, the final agreement now speaks of “managed access,” which would allow the Iranians to indefinitely stall the process of dispute resolution long enough to get rid of telltale signs of cheating.

Not only did the U.S. officials, including the president and secretary of state, cave on the issue. They proceeded to defend Iran’s position on

the grounds that the United States would also not allow inspectors into its military installations. Hello! If Iran were the United States, the P5 would not have spent the last twelve years trying to defang its nuclear program, for which it has no conceivable civilian need.

But one must step back from the details of what President Obama has wrought to truly appreciate the full magnitude of the catastrophe. When the United States joined the P5 negotiations with Iran, it was the world’s sole superpower, as even the Iranians say in their anti-America demonstrations.

The disparity between the military and economic power of the United States and Iran was enormous. As a result of the sanctions regime, Iran’s economy was in shambles, with runaway inflation coupled with a severe economic slowdown. (That slowdown was reversed in 2014 by the first sanctions relief.)

The pending agreement almost suggests that Obama has sought to grant Iran parity, to turn it not only into a “successful regional power,” in the President’s words, but into a fullfledged threat to the United States. The agreement does little, if anything, to limit Iran’s ballistic missile program, which means that Iranian submarines will be able in the not-too-distant future to strike from just a few hundred miles off America’s coast.

Moreover, the United States has apparently caved as well on removal of the arms embargo on Iran. As a consequence, Iran will within five years be able to purchase all the goodies, both defensive and offensive, in bankrupt Russia’s arsenal. And it will have plenty of cash with which to do so, thanks

to up to $100 billion in near-term sanctions relief.

With its new toys - e.g, cruise missiles - Iran will be a lot closer to being able to make good on its constant threats to close the Straits of Hormuz, through which 30% of the world’s oil supply passes. The U.S. Fifth Fleet will soon be incapable of insuring freedom of passage through the Straits.

President Obama has dramatically upped the danger to the United States, and set the stage for an aggressive Iran to become a regional hegemon, by pursuing an agreement with open desperation, as if the West were supplicants suing for peace. And he has continued to do so, even as the crowds in Teheran on last Friday’s Al-Quds day howled “Death to America,” in the presence of Iran’s “moderate” president Rouhani.

In his speech, Rouhani blamed the Zionist entity and the Global Arrogance (i.e., America) for bankrolling the internecine conflicts roiling the Muslim world. A Teheran newspaper pined for the day when the U.S. “which currently terrorizes the world will one fine day cease to be visible on the map of the world.”

As the signing loomed, Supreme Leader Khameini addressed the Iranian people to assure them that the battle against the Global Aggressor would never end: “The campaign against arrogance is one of the principles of the 1979 Islamic Revolution and the Holy Quran mandates the drive against arrogance.”

While the U.S. was serially capitulating to Iranian demands, the administration published a study that concluded that Iran’s support for international terrorist groups had not declined, and, in some respects, had even

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grown in the course of the negotiations.

Nor has Iran refrained from cheating on its commitments under the provisional agreement, as it continued to prevail at every stage in the negotiations. Despite administration claims that Iran has “frozen” enrichment under the provisional agreement, the Institute for Science and International Security estimates that it has enriched another four tons of low-enriched uranium, and has turned into oxide form (which cannot be easily weaponized) only about 5% of what was expected under the provisional agreement. And Germany’s domestic intelligence agency revealed last week that Iran has continued its efforts to procure technology for its ballistic missile and nuclear programs.

Nevertheless, the State Department continues to insist that Iran has met all its commitments under the provisional agreement. That willingness to whitewash violations and act as Iran’s lawyer bodes poorly for the efficacy of any inspection regime if a final agreement is signed.

All President Obama’s capitulations are based on a whack-a-doodle theory that by rolling over and exposing our stomachs to the Iranians they will come to love us. The unremitting insults against America and assurances of perpetual enmity from Iran’s Supreme Leader should have put to rest that theory. But they didn’t.

Beyond the President himself, the chief exponent of this theory has been Deputy National Security Council advisor Ben Rhodes, whose academic expertise in national security consists of a MFA in creative writing. An agreement, he told the ubiquitous Jeffrey Goldberg, would make much more likely “an evolution in Iran’s behavior.” He points to the election of president Rouhani as an example of moderating trends in the Iranian population.

Rhodes is no doubt right that the majority of the Iranian population thoroughly detests the mullahs. But Rouhani is not the proof. He is a thoroughly vetted and completely controlled creature of the regime. If the administration were really concerned about the views of the population, it

should have supported the 2009 Green Revolution against the regime for election fraud. But the agreement on the table now will only strengthen the regime by allowing it to decrease economic discontent with its sanctions windfall, and makes regime change less, not more, likely.

Ultimately, what neither Rhodes nor his boss can wrap their heads around is that not everyone or every group is motivated by pleasure and profit. The 1979 Islamic Revolution established a theocracy in Iran, which

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defined its purpose from the beginning as cleansing the Middle East of America’s corrupting influence. Only those who deny that religion can be the most powerful motivating factor - as we learn from suicide bombers - could fool themselves into thinking that the mullahs will ever transform themselves into a more congenial group.

Even president hope and change, however, would have a hard time selling the dream of future amity between the U.S. and Iran. Instead President Continued on Page 63

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SOUND OFF

I ALSO TRUST

IRAN

BY RABBI YY JACOBSON

P

resident Barack Obama may genuinely believe that the Iran nuclear agreement will foster world peace and stop Iran from getting the

bomb.

Perhaps he is right; perhaps he is wrong. But if he is making an error, the effects for him are not the same as the consequences for the Jewish people.

A few months ago, President Obama met a number of American Jewish leaders concerning the Iran deal. One of the people present at the White House meeting shared with me the following day that the President remarked: “If Iran attacks Israel, we will defend it.”

To which this Jew responded: “But that initial attack might claim 700,000 Jewish lives. We can’t afford that.”

In 1938, British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain went to Munich to negotiate with Adolf Hitler. He left believing Hitler’s promise of peace in exchange for Germany being allowed to annex large parts of Czechoslovakia. Chamberlain returned to England and announced that he had brought “Peace in our time.” Winston Churchill denounced him as a naive appeaser who believed that he could buy Hitler’s good will by giving in to his immoral demands: “You were given a choice between war and dishonor. You chose dishonor and you will have war.”

Today, people mock Chamberlain.

But might we not be making the same error?

Many maintain that the agreement with Iran is good as it has the capacity to bring Iran into “the community of nations.” We will no more isolate Iran

and will thus be able to influence the Republic to be more peaceful and logical.

If only. The entire state apparatus of the Islamic Republic, from the Revolutionary Guards to the supreme leader Ayatollah Khamenei, genuinely believe that their God craves “Death to America,” as they have been chanting for decades. The Iranian regime is composed of religious fanatics with similar ideologies to ISIS, al-Qaida, Boko Haram and all the other massmurdering Islamist movements, for whom human life means absolutely nothing.

We are about to award Iran $150 billion in currently frozen assets, plus the right to keep its nuclear program.

Would we do this for ISIS? Would we do this if Iran was just at our border?

And Iran is far more dangerous than ISIS. Iran openly calls for genocide, for wiping out six million Jews living in Israel from the map. Its Supreme Leader said a few weeks ago that the destruction of Israel is non-negotiable. No other country in the world is committed to annihilating another country, besides Iran. In Iran you have mass demonstrations, with the participation of its leaders, chanting “death to America!” Iran is the world’s greatest funder of terror organizations. Iran funds and directs the Lebanese terror organization Hezbollah, the most powerful military organization in Lebanon.

Iran is the major funder of Hamas, which plans on a daily basis the destruction of Israel. Would we give 150 billion to Hamas?

TRUST YOUR ENEMY Our people endured a long and tu-

multuous history - perhaps longer than any other People. If there’s one thing that we have learned over the past 4000 years it is this: When a regime or a leader pledges to wipe the Jews off the face of the earth, we should take them seriously. We have been here before.

Within days of signing this agreement, Iran’s Supreme leader Ayatollah Khamenei couldn’t help himself and strongly reiterated Iran’s mission to annihilate Israel. Just four days after the deal was announced, Iran’s Supreme Leader declared: “Whether the deal is approved or disapproved, we will never stop supporting our friends in the region and the people of Palestine, Yemen, Syria, Iraq, Bahrain and Lebanon. Even after this deal our policy towards the arrogant US will not change.”

Logically he should have waited a few months, till the money started flowing in. But the hate Iran has to Israel is so profound and runs so deep, that it could not be contained even as the world agreed to remove the sanctions.

Should we trust Iran? Of course!

Trust Iran when it declares: “The Holocaust is an event whose reality is uncertain.”

Trust Iran, when it states: “The cancerous tumor called Israel must be uprooted from the region.”

Trust Iran when it proclaims: “The foundation of the Islamic regime is opposition to Israel and the elimination of Israel from the region.”

Trust Iran as the world refused to trust last century’s Nazi propaganda machine.

The negotiations and deal never required the Iranian leadership to halt

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its relentless incitement for the destruction of the United States and Israel. Yes, one has to negotiate with one’s enemies. But that is with enemies who demonstrate some good will; not with enemies who continue to seek your demise and will use your money and appeasement to achieve that goal. Even as the talks proceeded, and since they were concluded, the poisonous rhetoric - rhetoric with inevitable violent consequence - has continued unabated.

The negotiations never stipulated that Iran cease its encouragement, training and arming of terrorist organizations such as Hamas and Hezbollah.

Iran promised all of this will continue.

Since 1945, when the horrors of the Holocaust became known, many good people - non-Jews and Jews alike - asked themselves, “what if?” What if we would have taken Hitler’s “Mein Kampf” seriously? What if we would have believed him? What if we would have done more to stop him?

The people who could have done more to prevent the Holocaust died with guilt, but they could claim ignorance. We aren’t going to have that excuse. We can’t afford to sit around in twenty years and ask: What if we had taken Iran seriously?

If there’s another thing that we’ve learned over the past millennia it is that we Jews tend to agree about almost nothing. The U.S. has 50 states and 2 parties; Israel is 1 state with 50 parties. And yet, on this issue - and I can’t recall another one like it - there is unanimous consensus among each and every Jewish party in the Knesset, from the left to the right. This is not about Netanyahu. This is not about oil or money. The People who stand to lose the most stand united in asking the US leadership not to aid, reward and embolden the enemy.

THE DEAL The President maintains that even if Iran will not change, the deal will do the job. It will prevent Iran from getting the bomb.

I fail to see how.

Inspections?

As Charles Krauthammer wrote in a Washington Post article: “Everyone now knows

that ‘anytime, anywhere’ - indispensable for a clandestine program in a country twice the size of Texas with a long history of hiding and cheating has been changed to “You’ve got 24 days and then we’re coming in for a surprise visit.” “New York restaurants,” observed Jackie Mason, “get more intrusive inspections than the Iranian nuclear program.”

The only type of inspection that matters is ‘anytime, anywhere;’ but that does not exist. If the International Atomic Energy Agency suspects cheating, it gives Iran up to 24-days’ notice. What is more, the United States is prohibited from ever sending in its own inspectors.

Plus, no military sites can ever be inspected. Iran can establish or move nuclear facilities to whatever area it wishes and label those areas “military.”

Which brings us to Wednesday’s Associated Press report that one of the side deals reached between Iran and the UN’s International Atomic Energy Agency provides for Iran to carry out its own inspection work at the Parchin military facility where the IAEA has long alleged it experimented with high-explosive detonators for nuclear arms. This is beyond absurd. As David Horowitz put it, “It’s akin to having Bernie Madoff scrutinize his own business practices, or Tour de France cyclists conduct their own doping tests… except it has global life-and-death implications.”

Why did Obama not share this with the American People? Olli Heinonen, who was in charge of the Iran probe as deputy IAEA director general from 2005 to 2010, told the AP on Wednesday he could recall no previous instance where a country being probed for nuclear wrongdoing was allowed to conduct its own investigation.

Even if one believes the agreement to be effective, it does little or nothing to prevent Iran from making nuclear weapons in 10 years.

During his speech a few weeks ago at the American University, the President said: “There will be 24/7 monitoring of Iran’s key nuclear facilities.”

He left out one detail. There is no 24/7 monitoring of anything Iran does-

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n’t want monitored 24/7 and no monitoring at all of any facility Iran labels “military.”

Alexander the Great reportedly once said, “I am not afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion; I am afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep.”

We are a nation of lions, but it feels like we are being led by sheep.

A TIME TO ACT This is a moment that calls on every one of us, particularly people of influence, to contact our representatives in Congress and ask them to, in the words of the President at his American University speech, “leave behind a world that is more secure and more peaceful for our children.” Ask them to trust Iran.

Churchill once said, “An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.”

“The Guardian of Israel will neither slumber nor sleep,” said the Psalmist. But we must do our part to deny the crocodile the freedom and money to prepare his next feast.

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Inspiration A TRUE HERO

F

or half a century, the world has applauded John Glenn as a heart-stirring American hero.

He lifted the nation’s spirits when, as one of the original Mercury 7 astronauts, he was blasted alone into orbit around the Earth. The enduring affection for him is so powerful that even now people find themselves misting up at the sight of his face or the sound of his voice.

But for all these years, Glenn has had a hero of his own, someone who he has seen display endless courage of a different kind: Annie Glenn.

They have been married for 68 years.

He is 90; she just turned 92.

There has been recent news coverage of the 50th anniversary of Glenn’s flight into orbit. We are being reminded that, half a century down the line, he remains America’s unforgettable hero.

He has never really bought that.

Because the heroism he most cherishes is of a sort that is seldom cheered. It belongs to the person he has known longer than he has known anyone else in the world.

John Glenn and Annie Castor first knew each other when - literally - they shared a playpen.

In New Concord, Ohio, his parents and hers were friends. When the families got together, their children played.

John - the future Marine fighter pilot, the future test-pilot ace, the future astronaut - was pure gold from the start. He would end up having what it took to rise to the absolute pinnacle of American regard during the space race; imagine what it meant to be the young John Glenn in the small confines of New Concord.

Three-sport varsity athlete, most admired boy in town, Mr. Everything.

Annie Castor was bright, was caring, was talented, was generous of spirit. But she could talk only with the most excruciating of difficulty. It haunted her.

Her stuttering was so severe that it was categorized as an “85%” disability -

85% of the time, she could not manage to make words come out.

When she tried to recite a poem in elementary school, she was laughed at. She was not able to speak on the telephone.

She could not have a regular conversation with a friend.

And John Glenn loved her.

Even as a boy he was wise enough to understand that people who could not see past her stutter were missing out on knowing a rare and wonderful girl.

They married on April 6, 1943. As a military wife, she found that life as she and John moved around the country could be quite hurtful. She has written: “I can remember some very painful experiences especially the ridicule.”

In department stores, she would wander unfamiliar aisles trying to find the right section, embarrassed to attempt to ask the salesclerks for help. In taxis, she would have to write requests to the driver, because she couldn’t speak the destination out loud. In restaurants, she would point to the items on the menu.

A fine musician, Annie, in every community where she and John moved, would play the organ in church as a way to make new friends. She and John had two children; she has written: “Can you imagine living in the modern world and being afraid to use the telephone? ‘Hello’ used to be so hard for me to say. I worried that my children would be injured and need a doctor. Could I somehow find the words to get the information across on the phone?”

John, as a Marine aviator, flew 59 combat missions in World War II and 90 during the Korean War. Every time he was deployed, he and Annie said goodbye the same way. His last words to her before leaving were: “I’m just going down to the corner store to get a pack of gum.”

And, with just the two of them there, she was able to always reply: “Don’t be long.”

On that February day in 1962 when

the world held its breath and the Atlas rocket was about to propel him toward space, those were their words, once again.

And in 1998, when, at 77, he went back to space aboard the shuttle Discovery, it was an understandably tense time for them.

What if something happened to end their life together? She knew what he would say to her before boarding the shuttle. He did - and this time he gave her a present to hold onto: A pack of gum.

She carried it in a pocket next to her heart until he was safely home.

Many times in her life she attempted various treatments to cure her stutter.

None worked.

But in 1973, she found a doctor in Virginia who ran an intensive program she and John hoped would help her. She traveled there to enroll and to give it her best effort. The miracle she and John had always waited for at last, as miracles will do, arrived. At age 53, she was able to talk fluidly, and not in brief, anxiety-ridden, agonizing bursts.

John has said that on the first day he heard her speak to him with confidence and clarity, he dropped to his knees to offer a prayer of gratitude.

He has written: “I saw Annie’s perseverance and strength through the years and it just made me admire her and love her even more.” He has heard roaring ovations in countries around the globe for his own valor, but his awe is reserved for Annie, and what she accomplished: “I don’t know if I would have had the courage.”

Her voice is so clear and steady now that she regularly gives public talks. If you are lucky enough to know the Glenns, the sight and sound of them bantering and joking with each other and playfully finishing each other’s sentences is something that warms you and makes you thankful just to be in the same room.

Monday will be the anniversary of the Mercury space shot, and once again people will remember, and will speak of the heroism of Glenn the astronaut.

But if you ever find yourself at an event where the Glenns are appearing, and you want to see someone so brimming with pride and love that you may feel your own tears start to well up, wait until the moment that Annie stands to say a few words to the audience.

And as she begins, take a look at her husband’s eyes.

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56

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59

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T

O

R

A

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H

THE SHORT VORT

HIS NAME WAS DOV BER

BY RABBI RON YITZCHOK EISENMAN

(Editor’s note: This Vort is about me and about you.

You may recognize certain people in this Vort and you will think you know who they are. And you may be correct; however, equally correct is everyone else who is ‘sure’ they know the person I am referring to. The truth is that I am referring to everyone and to no one; to you and to me; to us as a whole. If you recognize yourself in this article, you are truly blessed.)

H

e was named Dov Ber at his bris; however, everyone called him

Beryl.

He was the ninth of eventually eleven children, the youngest boy of seven brothers and his oldest sister already had two children of her own when he came into the world.

His family was one of the jewels of their neighborhood. The father Rav Simcha was an accomplished Talmid Chochom and was well respected for his insightful Torah thoughts and was often asked to speak in the local shul.

He was now a Rebbe in one of the local Mesivtas and he had high hopes for Beryl as he did for all his children.

Rav Simcha had good reason to be hopeful; all Beryl’s six brothers were either ‘holding in learning’ or were already regarded as budding Talmidei Chachomim.

Despite the established family track record, and notwithstanding the cliché that ‘the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,’ Beryl, already from an

early age, never displayed the same enthusiasm to learning as was anticipated.

He preferred tinkering with tools to studying the Talmud and when he reached Bar Mitzvah he preferred pushing a plunger to polishing up his “Pshetl.”

Needless to say, his parents, and particularly his father, was frustrated with “Beryl the budding plumber” as opposed to one who plumbs the depth of a difficult Sugya.

Rav Simcha and his wife began to take their son to various ‘educational experts;’ however, they were little or no help. Beryl was Beryl and as he entered his middle teens, he struggled more and more in Yeshiva.

Perhaps words were said which never should have been; perhaps voices were raised when they should have been lowered; and perhaps feelings were hurt when healing should have occurred. Whatever the reason and without pointing fingers, by the time I met Beryl he was known as Brian and suffice to say he had drifted far from the “Pshetyl peroration”

days of his youth.

I met Brian when he came once for Shabbos to Passaic.

He was actually quite helpful when he ran into me outside of my office and helped me carry in some Seforim without even being asked.

I forgot about Brian until I received a phone call from Rav Simcha about two months later requesting an appointment.

Later that week Rav Simcha and his wife were sitting across from me in my office.

I was immediately impressed by their sincerity and their concern for their son. I realized that they wanted their son to be happy and to be living a Torah-true life and they were willing to do almost anything to achieve that goal.

They had spent thousands of dollars on private tutors and on sending him for a year to a yeshiva in Eretz Yisroel for ‘kids at risk’ and were not giving up.

I asked them why they were coming to me, as they did not live in Passaic and we had never met before.

The father replied that he enjoys my articles in Mishpacha and considers me a sensitive person. I replied that words can be deceiving and I possessed no insight to offer any creative original ideas and I certainly had no rabbinic wand to wave and make their problems disappear.

“We understand; however, will you at least hear us out?”

I listened as they told me how

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much love and attention they had wrapped Beryl in and how whatever he needs, “he knows that we will be there for him.”

I listened and asked just one question. “I know that Beryl knows that you love him and will do whatever it takes for him to be like you; however, does he know that even if he does not ‘end up’ like you that you will still always accept him and love him just like any of your other children?”

“Are you suggesting that we settle for a non-Torah lifestyle for our son?”

“I never said that. I just asked, does he know that whatever he will be will always be valued by you?”

A month passed and Brian’s mother called me.

She did not tell me that Beryl is back in yeshiva, learning twenty hours a day or that he regrew his payos and is now in Eretz Yisroel ‘shteiging’ away.

She said: “We took your advice and began to accept Beryl for who he is and stopped attempting to make him into a clone of his father.

Beryl’s birthday was last Sunday, June 14th, and although we always buy our children Seforim for their birthdays, this time we went to the hardware store and bought Beryl a power drill which we knew he had his eye on for a while.

That was in the morning. In the afternoon Beryl called us up and asked if he could come over. He hadn’t asked to come over in months.

When he arrived in the house he said, ‘Thank you so much for the drill.

I also have something to give you. I bought Abba a little present.’

He presented his father with a new Siddur which he purchased, as he knew his father would enjoy it.

As Beryl gave his father the siddur, my husband said, ‘Beryl, I am very proud of you, and I love you.

Thank you.’

Beryl looked at his father and said back, ‘Abba, I am very proud of you and I love you too.’

And with that they fell into each other’s embrace and they cried.

I know we are still far from where we want to be. However, I also know that we are a lot closer today than we were yesterday.”

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T O R A H

KI SAVO

BY RABBI BEREL WEIN

T

he next few parshiyos of the Torah, leading up to the final uplifting and glorious conclusion, portray for us a somber picture of the experiences that the Jewish people will undergo in their march through history.

The descriptions of the horrors that will overtake the Jewish people, when their national entity is destroyed and they embark on a long and painful exile of millennia, are graphic, frightening… and tragically accurate.

As we read in the Torah, the Jewish people wondered how it was possible for the world to worship with intense loyalty the false gods and imperfect faiths. Because of this vexing question, the Jewish people as a whole also succumbed to such worthless worship and falsity. This in turn led the Jewish people to wonder why they suffered such an onerous fate in their history.

The Torah itself will teach us in a later chapter that the nations of the world will also wonder in amazement as to the extent of the destruction that the Jewish people and their land will suffer at the hands of others. And even though the Torah proposes an answer to this question - that the Jewish people were guilty of forsaking their G-d and faith - they seem to be entitled to complain that the punishments inflicted upon them were unduly harsh and cruel.

The descriptions of these punishments that appear in this week’s Torah reading, in their graphic detail, leave little room for imagination of the disasters that will fall upon the Jewish people individually and nationally. If

there is a portion of the Torah that truly rattles our cage, this week’s reading is certainly the one.

There are no easy words of comfort that can be offered to ameliorate the stark accuracy of the parsha or soften its impact. The only slight comfort that I can derive is that all of this, which has transpired literally before Jewish eyes over the last century, was predicted long ago, and that the words of the Torah remain true for all eternity.

Ramban, writing in the thirteenth century, stated then that the accuracy of the words of Moshe uttered seven hundred and fifty years earlier should be sufficient to renew the faith of every Jew in the veracity of Torah and the tenets of Judaism. How much more so is this relevant to our time and generation, living as we do nine hundred years after the time of Ramban. The total accuracy of what Moshe prophesied is itself a proof of that truth as well as the greatness of his character and leadership.

Rabbi Akiva taught us that the fulfillment in every detail, of the prophecies of doom and destruction, is itself a confirmation of the accuracy of the prophetic writings about our redemption and restoration to physical and spiritual greatness and serenity. I had a history teacher who said that Jewish history is really mainly a story of pogroms and books. That is far too somber an assessment. It is much more than that. It is more importantly the history of loyalty and tenacity, creativity and purpose, faith and achievement and an undying belief in a better tomorrow for the Jewish people and all of humankind.

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T O R A H

An Elul Primer by Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss

T

he month of Elul is upon us with all of its seriousness and high stakes. First of all, it is the last month of the year and in Yiddishkeit this is very significant for we have a Talmudic concept, “Hakol holeich achar hachosom - Everything goes according to the finale.” So, in a very real way, in the month of Elul we get a golden opportunity to correct the past year’s mistakes. Additionally, it is crucial to reflect before Rosh Hashanah on the many gifts that Hashem gave us during the past year so that we can say “Thank You” for the past before petitioning for the future. This is why, when we start saying Selichos, we say the refrain, “Lishmoah el ha’rina v’el hatefilah - Hashem should hearken to the song and to the prayer.” It is imperative that we sing our appreciation before we pray for more of Hashem’s benevolence. So, let’s make our Modim in Shemone Esrei more meaningful this month and thank Hashem for not being in the hospital, for having a job, for having a spouse, and other blessings.

As we hear the shofar every morning during Elul, the Rambam tells us that it’s an alarm to remind us to take stock of our behaviors and to repent.

My single biggest recommendation for this time of year is that people should make a “To-Do-Better-List,” to have in their Machzor on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. On the Day of Judgement, we don’t simply ask Hashem for another year. We want a better year: Better health, better parnassah (livelihood), better marriages, better, better, better. Hashem responds, “No problem, I have infinite treasures in Heaven to fulfill all of your requests. Just

one thing! Tell Me how you are going to be better. That’s only fair. If you want better, you have to give Me something in exchange.” It’s a quid pro quo arrangement. So, in order to make this list, one must sit down and attend to a rather painful assignment - and that is the making of a Cheshbon HaNefesh, a personal accounting of our behaviors.

This inspection is not enjoyable, for we never like to shine a light upon our flaws. But it’s the only way that we can properly craft an honest To-DoBetter-List. The proper way to make such an examination is to review the entire day from Modeh Ani in the morning to Krias Shema Al HaMitah at night and see what needs improvement. Don’t become depressed or dismayed if the list is long, for this also means that with a solid campaign of improvement, you can expect great improvement in the quality of your life for the coming year.

Here’s another thought. We will ask Hashem for many things for the coming year. Let me offer some advice on how to petition Hashem more wisely. In the Hagadah Shel Pesach, right before the Mah Nishtana, we find the instructions, “Kahn haben sho’el Here, the son asks.” We find these instructions in almost every printed Hagadah. Is it written only for the absolute novice? I mean, who doesn’t know the function of the Mah Nishtana? The great Chassidic Admorim of yesteryear explain that there is a much more profound message: Here is the place to ask for a son. When we ask Hashem for something, why should He fulfill our request? We need to give Him a reason, so explains the Admorim. We ask for a son by Mah Nish-

tana, give us a son so that we should be able to fulfill the mitzvah of teaching our son about the Exodus. Now, that’s the way to ask for something.

This is a guide on how to successfully petition Hashem for all of our needs - so that if someone wants a bump in their salary, they say to Hashem, “If I wouldn’t be worried about my bills all of the time I would be able to spend more time learning Torah.” Or “If I had better Shalom Bayis, marital harmony, I’d be able to give a better example to my children for their future marriages.” Or “If I had an easier commute, I would be able to daven longer and put my tefillin on with more concentration.” Or how about “If I had more money, there is so much chesed I would like to do.” This is the way we should approach our prayers.

Finally, let’s not wait until erev Yom Kippur when we say Tefilah Zakeh to forgive people. Let’s forgive them now, before the Day of Judgement, and make a deal with Hashem: Just like I forgive others, even though they might not deserve it, please Hashem forgive me as well, even if You find me undeserving. In the merit of our Elul preparation, I’d like to wholeheartedly wish my readership and your families a very healthy, happy and wonderful New Year.

Sheldon Zeitlin takes dictation of, and edits, Rabbi Weiss’ articles.

Rabbi Weiss is available to speak in your community before the High Holy Days. To bring him to your community, call now 718.916.3100 or email RMMWSI@aol.com.

To receive a weekly cassette tape or CD directly from Rabbi Weiss, please send a check to Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss, P.O. Box 140726, Staten Island, NY 10314 or contact him at RMMWSI@aol.com.

Now back in print is a large size paperback edition of Power Bentching. To order call him at 718916-3100 or email at above.

Attend Rabbi Weiss’s weekly shiur at the Landau Shul, Avenue L and East 9th in Flatbush, Tuesday nights at 9:30 p.m. Join him on Mondays and Thursdays at the famous Woodbourne Shul, and on Sunday night at the beautiful Woodridge Shul.

Rabbi Weiss’ Daf Yomi and Mishnah Yomis shiurim can be heard LIVE on Kol Haloshon at (718) 906-6400. Write to KolHaloshon@gmail.com for details.

They can now also be seen on TorahAnyTime.com.

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Jonathan Rosenblum… Continued from Page 51 Obama, ably assisted by his Secretary of State and the latter’s team, has told a series of whoppers besides which, “If you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor,” pales in comparison. Stephen Hayes of the Weekly Standard helpfully breaks down some of those whoppers.

In April, President Obama insisted in a Rose Garden statement that “American sanctions on Iran for its support of terrorism, its human rights abuses, its ballistic missile program will continue to be fully enforced.” Treasury Secretary Jack Lew made the same promise at the Jerusalem Post conference at which he was booed in June. In the final agreement, however, virtually all sanctions and the United Nations arms embargo are removed.

Secretary of State Kerry emphatically insisted in April that Iran would detail all military dimensions of its nuclear program: “They have to do it. It will be done. It will be part of a final agreement. It has to be.” But in late June, Kerry said the P5+1 is no longer “fixated” on the past, about which it has “absolute” knowledge, and focused only on the future.

Details of past nuclear work, however, are very much about the future, for without a baseline of past work, it is impossible for nuclear inspectors to assess what the Iranians are up to now. The claim of absolute knowledge of Iran’s past program is total nonsense. Gen. Michael Hayden, former CIA Director under President Obama, said at a June conference sponsored by the Foundation for Defense of Democracies that American intelligence alone “will be insufficient to build up enough confidence that an agreement is being honored.” The United States has in every instance been caught by surprise by other countries going nuclear e.g. the Soviet Union in its day, China, India, Pakistan, and North Korea.

As early as December 23, 2013, President Obama correctly noted that the Iranians had no need for an underground, fortified facility like Fordow in order to have a peaceful program. But under the agreement, the centrifuges in Fordow will all remain in place, and be capable of being quickly reconverted to enriching uranium, according to Olli Heinonen, former International Atomic Energy Agency deputy-director for safeguards.

National Security Council spokesman Tommy Vietor described the “clear” American position in April 2012 that Iran must fully suspend enrichment as required by multiple U.N. Security Council resolutions. Under the agreement, those Security Council resolutions will be history and Iran’s right to enrichment expressly recognized. The deal merely limits the number of centrifuges Iran can operate for a period of years.

Chief negotiator Wendy Sherman testified before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee that Iran’s ballistic missile program would have to be addressed as part of a comprehensive agreement. Now, she says, only ballistic missiles capable of carrying nuclear warheads are of concern.

Most important, as mentioned above, the anytime, anywhere inspection regime has been replaced by “managed access” that the Iranians will be able to manipulate with ease.

Each of the original American positions reflected the Continued on Page 111

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TODAY

T I M E L I N E

Today was the worst day ever And don’t try to convince me that There’s something good in every day Because when you take a closer look, This world is a pretty evil place.

Even if Some goodness does shine through Once in a while Satisfaction and happiness don’t last.

And it’s not true that It’s all in the mind and heart Because True happiness can be obtained Only if one’s surroundings are good.

It’s not true that good exists I’m sure you can agree that The reality Creates My attitude

AN ECLECT IC COL LECTION OF NEWS ITEMS, FEATURES AND HUMOR WE JUST COULDN’T FIT ANYWHERE ELSE!

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It’s all beyond my control And you’ll nevers hear me say that Today was a good day Now read it from the bottom up

SEPTEMBER 2015

S

ometimes you wake up in the morning and you have to ask yourself, “Am I living in the United States or in some third-world, backwater, banana republic?” What is going on here?! It’s getting harder and harder to remain optimistic about the direction in which this country is headed, not to mention the direction the whole world is taking.

Let’s just visit, in no particular order, a few of the headline issues bedevilling this country, indeed the world, and see if we can find any commonality among them.

1. Planned Parenthood and the wholesale selling of baby body parts: It doesn’t seem possible that anyone could see these undercover videos and not be totally repulsed by the callous disregard for the sanctity of human life on blatant display. It’s one thing to acknowledge the reality of abortion (even we will protect the life of the mother); it is quite another to objectify and commercialize a precious human life. Sickening!

2. The Supreme Court finding unconstitutional, State laws defining marriage as a union between one man and one woman: Five unelected lawyers (at least two of which should certainly never have been allowed to rule on the case, as they presided over same gender marriage ceremonies while the case was being heard) took it upon them-

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selves to not only overturn the will of the people, freely expressed in election after election where ballot initiatives codifying marriage as between one man and one woman were overwhelmingly passed, but to change the basic definition of thousands of years of civilization. What hubris!

What unmitigated gall! What... CHUTZPAH!!!

3. The infamous “deal” with Iran: Here we have the latest in a long and disheartening string of foreign policy disasters engineered by this corrupt and malevolent administration. It would be stretching the dictionary definition of “negotiation” beyond recognition, to apply that term to the discussions that led to this deal. Everything the Iranians wanted they got; anything the Americans wanted was soundly and emphatically rejected! Just another nauseating display. My two-year old granddaughter could have done a better job.

At least she knows how to say no!

While this list is hardly comprehensive, it is enough to demonstrate the truly distressing commonality that exists among them, namely that there is a substantial portion of our population that agrees with and defends each of these positions. That an overwhelming percentage of this population calls the Democrat party home, and could tip the balance in an election and keep them in power, is something that keeps me up at night. I’m not sure this country is safe anymore.

DECLINE

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R E A L

L I F E

A Must-Read Story of Hashgacha

T

he Chovos Ha’levavos writes in the Sha’ar Ha’bitachon section that Hashem never takes His mind, as it were, off of us.

Not even for a second. He knows everything about us, He knows precisely what we need, and He plans the salvation that we need long before we ever know about the problem. When

we look back and see how Hashem was planning and working behind the scenes, we receive so much encouragement and inspiration, and we feel so close to Him. We are reminded that He is with us at all times, and is constantly looking out for us.

This past Motza’eh Tisha B’Av, a Rabbi from our community woke up at 3:30am with some chest pains. He woke up his wife, and they were uncertain whether he was just experiencing some indigestion, or if perhaps this was something serious. Just to be safe, they decided to call Hatzalah. They were renting a home in Lakewood for the summer, and they did not have the number for the Lakewood division of Hatzalah. However, the wife saw that on the phone, staring her right in the face, was the word “Hatzalah” next to the speed dial. She called and asked that they send somebody, adding that this was not an emergency and no sirens should be sounded so as not to wake anybody up.

The Rabbi went downstairs to wait for the knock on the door, and within 30 seconds Hatzalah members, along with paramedics, were at the door. They brought with them a special high-tech machine that tests the heart, and they detected that the Rabbi was in the midst of a massive heart attack.

Then, suddenly, the Rabbi lost consciousness.

He had no pulse, and he looked lifeless. The paramedics switched a button on the machine and immediately started shocking him.

Thankfully, they were able to bring him back to consciousness.

It turned out that the Rabbi at that moment suffered the most severe type of heart attack. The LAD artery was fully blocked. This artery is nicknamed “the widow maker” because if it abruptly becomes blocked, it causes a massive heart attack that generally leads to sudden death.

In describing the Rabbi’s condition, the doctor who treated him said that normally, at the time of a heart attack, the electric current is dimmed, and machines can bring it back to regular strength. In the Rabbi’s case, however, the lights were completely out, and they could come back on only if Hashem turned the switch. Even if one

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SEPTEMBER 2015

does not want to accept that this was an open miracle, the only way the Rabbi could be saved was by being shocked immediately at the time of the heart attack. The Hatzalah members reported that they had never before succeeded in bringing somebody back after that kind of heart attack. Moreover, this kind of heart attack is very difficult to detect. The Rabbi’s symptoms were not signs of a heart attack.

The paramedics were able to detect it only because they had with them a special machine, which was then able to immediately start the shocking. If they had not detected the heart attack with this machine, they would have started CPR. The amazing thing about this story is that Hatzalah trucks are never equipped with this special machine.

They have defibrillators, but not detectors. Why did the Hatzalah volunteers have that detection machine with them? And why were they so close to the rabbi’s house at 3:30 in the morning when they received that call?

The first part of the answer is that during the previous day, Tisha B’Av,

the Rabbi’s wife viewed the Chafetz Chaim Heritage Foundation video, and was very inspired. She committed herself to putting into practice the message she learned from the video - the message of being forgiving and indulgent. At 1:30am, two hours before her husband’s heart attack, the woman received a text message which made her upset, and could have potentially caused a fight. But she immediately gave in and did not make any issue of the matter at all. She later said that perhaps Hashem gave her this opportunity to earn the merits she needed to save her husband.

After her husband’s heart attack, she called the Chafetz Chaim Heritage Foundation to thank them for the inspiring video, and told them about her husband’s heart attack. The person on the other line enthusiastically informed her that there is much, much more to this story. That person’s brother-in-law is a member of Lakewood’s Hatzalah division, and on the morning of Tisha B’Av he received a call from his son’s sleepaway camp that his son’s blood pressure had dropped dras-

tically, the result of an infection that harmed his heart.

The clinic where his son was treated wanted to transfer him to a nearby hospital, but the father asked that the diagnosis be emailed to him so he could show it to his doctor. His doctor saw the diagnosis and determined that the condition was quite serious. The boy, he said, needed to be transferred as soon as possible to the Children’s Hospital in Philadelphia.

The clinic refused to transport the boy so far away when there was a hospital nearby, so the father, who had an ambulance, decided he would pick up his son and bring him to Philadelphia. It would take him three hours to get to the camp, and then four hours to reach Philadelphia. His doctor told him that he must bring along with him special heart equipment and a team of paramedics in case they are needed along the way.

This is how the special machine, which was ultimately used to save the Rabbi’s life, ended up in an ambulance of Lakewood Hatzalah.

After a full day of traveling, the

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SEPTEMBER 2015

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ambulance and paramedics made their way back to Lakewood. Everybody was exhausted. They reminded the driver not to miss their exit - exit 89 but the driver somehow missed the exit anyway. He had to proceed to exit 91, get off the highway there, and then drive back. When they got off the highway at exit 91, they received the call about the Rabbi. At that moment they were just 20 seconds away from the house. They sensed that this was Min Hashamayim as they had reminded the driver to get off at the right exit, but he missed it. And so, despite the fact that the call did not sound urgent, they nevertheless brought in the entire team of paramedics along with the special machine.

It was used the second it was needed.

So many things had to happen for the Rabbi’s life to be saved. He woke up, the phone number was on the phone, and a Hatzalah vehicle with a team of paramedics and the exact equipment the Rabbi needed ‘happened’ to be practically at his doorstep at 3:30am.

Hinei lo yonum v’lo yishan shomer Yisroel - Hashem never sleeps, and is always watching over us to protect us.

After this incident, the owner of the Lakewood home which the Rabbi and his wife were renting phoned to see if the Rabbi was alright. The Rabbi’s wife thanked her for having Hatzalah’s number saved on the phone.

“Wow,” the woman said, “that is my old phone. I had a new phone system in the house, and I was planning to buy another one to bring to the mountains for the summer, but I never got around to it. So, I decided to take my new phones with me, and I plugged in that old phone right before I left.”

The new phone did not have Hatzalah’s number on it. Hashem was planning this salvation months in advance. Also, it turned out that the boy in sleepaway camp was misdiagnosed and his problem had nothing to do with the heart. Baruch Hashem he is recovering nicely.

We are so fortunate that we have Hashem taking care of us at all times, and working to solve our problems well before we even know about them.

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R E A L

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L I F E

RemembeRing the hebRon massacRe of 1929

I

t is 77 years since the Brutal Massacre of the Jewish Community of Chevron, and I thought it would be important to provide the following recently found letter from a survivor who recounts the horrors of the pogrom. The letter’s author requests that his surviving children read the account every year to recall the survival and the massacre.

Following is an introduction, and then the letter itself.

The massacre of the Jews of Chevron in 1929 put an end to the ancient Jewish community at the burial site of the patriarchs.

The riots which erupted throughout the country were an organized Arab attack against the entire Zionist enterprise with the aim of preventing the eventual establishment of a Jewish state. They were the most violent eruption until that time in the conflict that has been termed “one long war between Arabs and Jews comparable to the Hundred Years War in medieval Europe.”

Unlike other parts of the country, where Jews resisted with force, the Chevron community reflected the mindset of the pre-modern Jew, conditioned by almost 2,000 years of Jewish powerlessness. The reaction of the local leadership to the impending attack was to turn to the authorities - the British appointed governor and the Arab notables - for protection, which, when it arrived, was much too late.

The events in Chevron and my grandparents’ miraculous rescue are vividly described in a letter written by

my grandfather nine days later to my mother, Blanche Greenberg.

In 1907, the peak year of Jewish immigration into the United States, my maternal grandfather, Aharon Reuven Bernzweig, his wife Breine Zuch Bernzweig, and their six children left Stanislaw, Galicia (then Austrian Poland), and settled in New York City.

Twenty years later, in 1927, after their children were grown and they had accumulated a modest capital, they were in a position to fulfill the dream of many traditional Jews - to spend their retirement years in Eretz Hakodesh, the Holy Land.

Late in the spring of 1929, my grandparents travelled to the United States in order to attend my brother’s bar mitzvah. Upon their return they decided to escape the heat of a Tel Aviv summer by vacationing in Chevron.

Five days later the riots broke out.

Zeide Bernzweig’s health was affected by the Chevron ordeal, and he died of a heart attack in 1936. Baba Breine continued to live at 16 Bialik Street in Tel Aviv until her death in 1945. That is where I would visit and spend Shabbat in 1937-38, when I studied at Hebrew University.

Aharon and Breine Bernzweig were buried on the Mount of Olives. In the summer of 1967, after the reunification of Jerusalem, my wife and I found and restored their desecrated graves.

While members of the family knew that Zeide had written a letter about Chevron, we were not familiar with the actual text. I found the original in my parents’ papers after their death. The Yiddish is closely written on ten pages and is difficult to read. I am therefore greatly indebted to Helen G. Meyrowitz, who deciphered the text and prepared the initial translation, which I have revised and edited.

While preparing the letter for publication, I found clarifying and corroborating information in the testimonies of other eyewitnesses, preserved in the Central Zionist Archives in Jerusalem.

From the survivor documents I was able to identify others who were in the group of 33 who shared the same hiding place, as well as the names of the Arabs who saved their lives.

MEGILLAT HEBRON With the help of G-d, Monday, Torah portion Shoftim V’shotrim, 5689 (September 2, 1929), Tel Aviv, may it be built up and firmly established, speedily in our days, Amen.

My dear children, may you live and be well.

Even before I begin writing, my hand is already shaking, my head swims, and every limb is trembling. I am unable to get control of myself, be-

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SEPTEMBER 2015

cause the cries are still ringing in my ears. It is one week today since we came back from the bitter tragedy.

Each day I want to write to you, but when I sit down to write, all my limbs start to quiver and tears pour from my eyes, so I have to stop. Today for the first time I was able to pull myself together, with all my strength, with superhuman effort. I got up at dawn and sat down to write. I hadn’t started yet, but even before I could begin, my pen was already soaked with tears. Although it seems that I am writing this letter with ink, you should know that it is not ink, but tears.

Now, let me get to the point. I don’t really know where to start and where to finish, because my blood is still churning inside me. But I will begin my Megillah of Hebron. Children, as you already know from my earlier letter, Mama, may she live and be well, had been feeling very weak, ever since we came back from our trip to America. Moving to a new apartment and all the hard work involved added to it. The apartment wasn’t finished and there was endless aggravation because the work was not being done to her liking. On top of everything else, she couldn’t bear the terribly hot weather. It was awful; the perspiring was beyond human endurance. She lay in bed all day because she was too weak to walk about. I kept begging Mama, may she live and be well, with tears in my eyes, that we needed a change of climate. It was impossible to convince her because she didn’t want to abandon the house and leave it hefker. Finally she realized that she had no choice and she agreed. She did not want to go by herself, only with me. So we left home and went to the country - to Hebron.

We arrived on Sunday, August 18th. There we went to a guest house, where we got a very nice room and came to an agreement on the charges.

We paid for one month in advance, since we planned to stay for several months, until after all the holidays, when it would be cooler.

From the very beginning, things did not go well. Although the air was very good and the weather cool, and Mama, may she be well, did not perspire any more, she caught a severe

cold and had to stay in bed. In addition, there were swarms of biting mosquitoes. We had no choice but to hope that things would get better. Unfortunately, things don’t always turn out the way we would like, and no one knows what the future holds.

Ever since we arrived in Hebron, we had heard talk of disturbances in Jerusalem, that Arabs and Jews were fighting. We didn’t have any specific details, but there were rumors in the air, so we were not in a happy state of mind. But what could we do about it?

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On Friday, the 23rd, we heard that things had gotten worse in Jerusalem.

Everyone became very uneasy and walked about without a head. We had forebodings that something terrible was about to happen - but what, exactly, we did not know. I was fearful and kept questioning the local people, who had lived there for generations. They assured me that in Hebron there could never be a pogrom, because as many times as there had been trouble elsewhere in Eretz Israel, Hebron had remained quiet. The local population had

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SEPTEMBER 2015

always lived very peacefully with the Arabs.

But my heart told me that the situation was serious. Hebron alone, without the surrounding villages, has a population of 24,000. Including the villages, there are 60,000 people. Of what significance is the Jewish community there, a mere 100 families?

What could we do to protect ourselves? We could only comfort ourselves with the hope that G-d, blessed be He, would have mercy, and the troubles would run their course quietly.

Friday afternoon the situation worsened. We heard that on the street Arabs had already beaten several Jews with clubs. Next we heard that all the Jewish stores had closed. The atmosphere was explosive. Everybody was afraid to go out into the street, and we locked ourselves in our rooms. Things looked really bad. What should we do?

“No one could go out, and no one could come in “[Joshua 6.1]; everybody was fearful. By now the local Jews too were saying that the situation was serious.

Suddenly, just one hour before candle lighting, pandemonium broke loose. Window panes were smashed on all sides. In our building, they broke every window and began throwing large stones inside. We hid ourselves.

They were breaking windows in all the Jewish homes. Now we were in deathly fear. As we were blessing the Shabbos candles, we heard that in the Yeshiva one young man had been killed. It was bitter, the beginning of a slaughter.

In the meantime, mounted policemen arrived, and all became still outside. We thought that our salvation had come. All through the night the police patrolled the streets. But it seemed that they were having problems. You can understand that I walked the floor all the night terribly worried, with my heart in my mouth. On Shabbos morning, we saw that the situation was getting worse. Cars kept racing back and forth through the streets. They were filled with Arabs armed with long iron bars, long knives, and axes. The Arabs kept screaming that they were going to Jerusalem to slaughter all the Jews.

Soon many Jews gathered in our house. We held a meeting and talked over the situation, but couldn’t think of anything we could do to protect ourselves, since none of us had any weapons. Many of the people remained in our house, because by then it was too dangerous to try to go home.

Now let me tell you about the massacre. Right after eight o’clock in the morning we heard screams. Arabs had begun breaking into Jewish homes. The screams pierced the heart of the heavens. We didn’t know what to do. Our house had two floors. We were downstairs and a doctor lived on the second floor. We figured that we would be safe in the doctor’s apartment, but how could we get up there?

The stairs were on the outside of the building, but it wasn’t safe to go out.

So we chopped through the ceiling and that way we climbed up to the doctor’s house. Well, after being there only a little while, we realized that we were still in danger because by that time the Arabs had almost reached our house.

They were going from door to door, slaughtering everyone who was inside.

The screams and the moans were terrible. People were crying Help! Help!

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SEPTEMBER 2015

But what could we do? There were thirty?three of us. Soon, soon, all of us would be lost.

Just then, G-d, blessed be He, in His great mercy, sent us an Arab who lived in back of our house. He insisted that we come down from the doctor’s apartment and enter his house through the back door. He took us to his cellar, a large room without windows to the outside. We all went in, while he, together with several Arab women, stood outside near the door. As we lay there on the floor, we heard the screams as Arabs were slaughtering Jews. It was unbearable. As for us, we felt that the danger was so great that we had no chance of coming out alive. Each one of us said his vidui (his confession in anticipation of death). At any moment we could be slaughtered, for double?edged swords were already at our throats. We had not even the slightest hope of remaining alive. We just begged that it should already be done and over.

Five times the Arabs stormed our house with axes, and all the while those wild murderers kept screaming at the Arabs who were standing guard to hand over the Jews. They, in turn, shouted back that they had not hidden any Jews and knew nothing. They begged the attackers not to destroy their homes.

We heard everything. In addition, the little children in our group kept crying. We were in deadly fear that the murderers outside would hear them.

As for me, I was already 99 percent in the next world. All the time that we were in the Arab’s house, I lay there on the floor in terrible pain (from a heart attack). It just happened that there were two doctors in the house.

They sat near me and they saved my life.

Well, I cannot continue describing the destruction any longer. It took several hours - to us it seemed like years until all became quiet outside. We still lay there, waiting for the Angel of Death to finish with us as quickly as possible.

But G-d heard our prayers. Suddenly, the door opened, and the police walked in. They had been told that we were hidden there. They demanded that we go along with them, and they

would take us to a safe place. We were afraid to go, because we thought they themselves might slaughter us. Eventually, they succeeded in convincing us that they had our good in mind. Since we couldn’t walk there, they brought automobiles and took us, under police guard, to the police station, which was in a safe location.

When we reached the police station, there was acted out a real?life dance of the devils, for the police had brought together those who were still alive, the surviving remnant. During the earlier confusion, naturally, no one could have known what was happening to anyone else, but there in the police station, everyone first discovered whom he had lost. As people told each other about their misfortunes and how many casualties they had suffered, there burst out a terrible cry, everyone shrieking and crying at the same time.

It was unbearable. Blessed G-d, give us strength! It was beyond human endurance. Three women went out of their minds right there.

In short, we were in the police station three days and three nights. We couldn’t eat and we couldn’t sleep. We lay on the ground in filth, just listening to the crying and the groaning. Finally, G-d, blessed be He, had mercy on us and on Monday night the police again transferred us - to Jerusalem. There we stayed in the Nathan Straus Health Center for two days and two nights, and on Wednesday we came back to Tel Aviv.

I am writing you only about our troubles. I don’t have the strength to write about the additional troubles of the whole Jewish community. That you will surely read in the American newspapers. It is very tragic, but everything is from G-d.

Now I will tell you the total number of people who were slaughtered in Hebron. As of today, there are 63 holy martyrs. While we were still there, 58 were buried in a common grave, 51 males and 7 females; up to today, there are 5 more martyrs from among the wounded. Of the wounded, 49 are in serious condition, and 17 slightly wounded. Who knows how many more fatalities there will be? The Yeshiva suffered 23 killed and 17 wounded.

Eight of the dead and 14 of the wound-

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ed from the Yeshiva are American boys. Gevald! Twenty?three living Torah scrolls were burned! May the heavens open and avenge us.

All the houses of study with their Torah scrolls and holy books were burned; everything in them was destroyed. All the homes were plundered; not even a straw was left!

We ourselves were left practically naked and barefoot. Since we had planned to stay there a few months, we had taken along all our clothes. Mama, may she live and be well, was left with only the one dress she was wearing and I, too, had only what I was wearing. They even took my talis and tefilin. Before Shabbos, I gave the money that I had brought along to the innkeeper for safekeeping. The Arabs took that money too, quite a large amount.

To make matters worse, the situation in the entire country is very bad, and no one is paying his debts. I have notes for several thousand dollars. Last week, notes for $750 came due, but no one paid. Who knows what will happen in the future? G-d forbid that we shouldn’t be ruined altogether. We’re trying to keep our heads above water while we keep hearing that here things are bad and there things are bad. May G-d, blessed be He, have mercy and help all the Jews, including us, that we should at least be well and be able to bear up under these trials. We Jews have had enough troubles!

I have no patience to write about family matters because my hand is still trembling.

Just one thing, my dear children, may you live and be well, I ask of you that you put away this letter for the generations. Each year, at an agreed?upon day, you should all meet and give thanks and praise to G-d, blessed be He, who saved your parents from this great catastrophe, and each one of you should make a generous contribution to charity. The miracle took place on Shabbos, Torah portion Ekev, the 18th day of the month of Av, 5689 9August 24, 19290, in Hebron.

Your father, who wishes you the best, writing to you through tears.

Aharon Aharon Reuven Bernzweig (Wife) Breine Zuch Bernzweig

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HEALTH & ADVICE

Dear Bubby If you would like advice from Bubby send your letters to: Bubby, c/o Country Yossi Family Magazine, 1310 48th Street, Suite 308, Brooklyn, New York 11219

BABY BLUES Dear Bubby, I feel bad to be complaining because Baruch Hashem I have recently been blessed with an adorable baby girl. But there is something that has been bothering me and I was wondering if you could shed some light on the dark clouds looming all around me.

From the day I came home from the hospital I have been completely amazed at how much joy and love I suddenly feel when I look into my daughter’s eyes. The problem is that my daughter wakes up every hour for a feeding, which at first I was more than happy to comply with. But after a few weeks the exhaustion began to take a toll on my physical and emotional wellbeing. I pride myself on being a good mother and a dedicated wife, but lately it all just feels like it’s too much. How can one person be expected to do the cooking, cleaning, hourly feedings - all on no sleep and drained energy. Bubby - I don’t mean to imply that my husband isn’t helpful. When he comes home from work he holds the baby and plays with her, but that’s just not enough. I look at other women who are in the same situation as me, plus they have 3 or 4 older children. I am completely in awe of how they seem to effortlessly juggle all of their responsibilities.

I knew having a child would drastically change my life. I knew life would now revolve around the baby and not me, but even with all the love and support I get I still feel so alone.

My husband is already looking forward to child #2, and Beezras Hashem when that time comes, I worry that there will be nothing left of me to give.

The funny thing is that my whole life I always wanted a large family. But now the idea frightens me. Bubby, what can

I do to change my perspective and to turn the negative into positive?

Sincerely, Mother in Distress Dear Mother in Distress, Ahhh! The joys of motherhood!

Welcome to the profession that lends no breaks, vacation time or monetary benefits. The profession that deprives of sleep, and will consume every moment of your life. Quitting or retiring is out of the question no matter how much you feel you need a break. It’s also the profession that is by far the most rewarding and inspiring. Motherhood is all about giving, and while that’s not always easy, somehow it ends up giving back so much more than you could ever have imagined!

Newborns require constant attention. They are completely dependent upon you for everything. In essence they are helpless; it is only through your constant care that they can survive. You need to begin recognizing your role in this child’s life as precious and crucial. Granted, you are deprived of sleep and down time, but with that time you are doing the most valuable deed a human being can do. However, you do need to keep up your energy in order to truly give your all. Don’t try to be a wonder woman and run yourself ragged. Try to nap when the baby naps, the dusting and cleaning will still be there waiting for you. Hiring cleaning help once in a while is a luxury worth investing in. Your husband and baby will benefit tremendously by having you happy and well rested. Most importantly, you will feel ready to embrace motherhood. Bear in mind that as time goes by you will find that you’ll have more time for yourself and

more hours a night to sleep. As a mother your responsibilities will change, as will the needs of your little girl. Try to appreciate each unique stage of your child’s life. Take it from an old bubby - children grow up so fast and before you know it this will all be behind you!

You are already worrying about the next baby; why not try taking life one day at a time. Don’t rush things and worry about things that haven’t happened yet. Face each new challenge as it is presented to you and always try remembering why you are feeling the way you do. When you’re exhausted and frustrated, ask yourself what’s causing it? Look at your beautiful, perfect little girl and remind yourself that it’s all for her - and she’s worth it, a million times over!

You mention that when you look at other mothers you are in awe, and can’t imagine how they do it. I want to tell you a little secret - every mother experiences the same difficulties, worries and fatigue. No one is perfect and everyone does the best that they can.

Never compare yourself to anyone else - you must work at being the best mother that you can be! Your worry and concern are in fact a wonderful indication that you are already a great mom with lots of potential. Every great mom has doubted herself and wondered if she’s doing enough. You are a new mother and all of your insecurities stem from the newness of your position. In time you will be a pro, giving advice to other new moms! And in the meantime be thankful for the precious gift you have been handed and try your best to enjoy it for all its wonder and delight!

Love, Bubby

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HEALTH & ADVICE

z u m

h S e

Th

Rabbi Bentzion Shafier

It’s Respect FIRst, Love second

A

husband and wife are walking when suddenly he trips.

“Oy!” she cries out. “Are you OK?! I hope you’re not hurt.”

“It’s OK. It’s OK,” he responds.

“I’m fine.”

Let’s revisit the scenario. The same man and woman. The same street. They are walking when suddenly he trips, and she cries out: “Klutz! What’s wrong with you?

Can’t you even walk without tripping?”

What’s the difference between Scenario One and Scenario Two? In the first scene, they are a newly-married couple. In the second, they have been married for three years already.

While this is an anecdote, it illus-

trates a critical point. When a couple begins a marriage, there is a sense of newness and excitement.

They are anxious to see each other; they enjoy each other’s company.

They are in the infatuation stage.

But that stage was designed to be short-lived. Their job is to now build the real bond of love. And while many couples do focus on the love in their marriage, they allow one area to slip: respect. And when respect slips, the relationship starts to fray. Sadly, it’s almost natural.

Dr. John Gottman, renowned marital therapist, did an eye-opening study. He studied interactions between couples and then compared their reactions to other people. To do this, he sat a husband and wife across from each other and videotaped them while they discussed certain issues.

Then he asked the wife to step outside, and he asked another woman to come in. He then asked the husband to converse about a similar subject with this stranger. He then brought the wife back in, and asked the husband to leave. Again, he introduced another man and asked the wife to have a conversation with this stranger.

Here is what he found: regardless of whether the couples were newly married or long-time veterans, over and over, they were less polite towards each other than they were to utter strangers. They were also quicker to

argue and less likely to accept the opinion of their spouses, as opposed to that of someone they had never met before.

Why is this? One reason is that we are socialized to be polite. Since childhood, we’ve been trained to use our manners and be courteous, and we remain true to that - outside the house.

The problem is that often, within our own homes, we forget how we are supposed to act.

Interestingly, the Rambam gives us a formula for a beautiful marriage.

“Our Sages commanded that a husband must respect his wife more than himself and love her as much as himself. Likewise, they commanded a wife to treat her husband with exceeding amounts of honor. If a couple does this, their union will be beautiful and praiseworthy. (Rambam Hilchos Ishus 15:19) The order the Rambam put things in is illustrative. “A man must respect his wife more than himself and love her as much as himself.” It’s respect first, and love second. This point becomes a major obstacle in many marriages. After a few months, or a few years, the common courtesy and basic respect starts to weaken.

This is the third really dumb mistake that very smart couples make.

They allow the respect to slip, and once that happens, the relationship starts to unravel.

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HEALTH & ADVICE

I told her to simply inform her son that I am a placement counselor, who assists teenagers.

A POUND OF CURE

HARD QUESTIONS

BY RABBI YAKOV HOROWITZ

T

he telephone rang. A woman was calling to discuss her concerns regarding her seventeen-year-old son. After a minute or two, she began sobbing uncontrollably as she described his downward slide throughout his High School years. The “bad friends;” the constant bickering with his parents over dozens of issues large or small; the tension and friction with his siblings; being asked to leave the four yeshivos that he had attended during those three years. Now he had hit rock bottom.

During the past six weeks, he refused to even consider enrolling in yet another yeshiva. He sleeps until noon, “hangs around the house” until suppertime, then, with a curt farewell, leaves the house. He returns in the early hours of the morning, goes to sleep, and begins the day in the same fashion as the previous ones. Any attempt by his parents to determine where or with whom he is spending his time is met with a disrespectful or downright rude retort.

Her voice became practically inaudible as she described the events of that particular morning. She had entered his room in a futile attempt to wake him up for Shachris. He became verbally abusive to her, and ordered her out of his room. When she refused to leave, he swore at her and physically removed her from the room, threatening her with bodily harm if she dared to enter again. “Rabbi Horowitz,” she cried, “My son was the sweetest child you could imagine. Now I am afraid that he is becoming clinically depressed. What should I do?!”

At this point, it was obvious to me that due to the mother’s distress, a serious, protracted discussion was impossible. After a few more minutes of

conversation, I hung up the telephone, with the promise of returning the call as soon as possible.

REFLECTION Later that evening, I began the second conversation by asking the woman how many times she had asked her son, that day, any of the following questions: “Why aren’t you going to yeshiva?”

“Why are you wasting your time?”

“When are you finally going to do something with your life?”

She mumbled an evasive response. I politely informed her that it would be simply impossible for me to assist her without her complete cooperation. She hesitantly answered “About ten or fifteen times.”

Fifteen times six (days) equals ninety comments per week. Ninety times six weeks totals five hundred and forty hurtful attacks on her son’s self-confidence. I explained to the woman that although her son’s disrespectful behavior is inexcusable, she must keep in mind that he is in as much agony as she is, perhaps more so. He feels that no yeshiva actually wants him, and that he has nowhere to go. Each time that she reminded him of this painful fact, she was inadvertently causing him needless anguish, and adding to the chasm that exists between them. His antisocial behavior is his clumsy response to his perception (real or imagined) that our society has rejected him.

After extracting a promise from her to refrain from any further barbs directed to her son, I offered to meet him in my home on Sunday afternoon.

A handsome, well-dressed young man swaggered into my study. After making small talk for a few minutes, I began by discussing his secular education. He had only completed the second year of High School (he maintained an 85 average), and was currently not enrolled in any program at all. I asked him if he had any computer skills; he answered that he did not. I chided him for not pursuing his quest for a High School diploma, or at least attaining a G.E.D., (an equivalency diploma). He was very agreeable, and we spent several minutes discussing his options.

We then shifted the conversation to his limudei kodesh (religious studies) pursuits. He grew visibly agitated as we discussed the reasons for his failure to achieve success in yeshiva.

He conceded that he was often uncooperative and had “an attitude” during his past two school placements, despite having caring rabbis who truly tried to communicate with him. I then probed into the current situation.

“Why don’t you make a serious effort to find a yeshiva where you can grow intellectually?” I asked.

“No yeshiva wants me; and even if I got accepted, I’m just not cut out for learning.”

I informed him that I disagreed with both statements. Besides, I asked him, “What do your parents say to this?”

“My mother said that I should join a yeshiva; any yeshiva, so that I can do a decent shidduch.”

“What do you say to that?” I asked.

“I refuse to waste my life. If I am not going to be successful in school, I’m better off just not going at all.”

We sat quietly for a few moments.

I then told him, “You never told this to your parents in the manner that you are speaking to me now.”

“How do you know?!” he angrily asked me.

I softly responded, “That’s obvious. They keep asking you to go to

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SEPTEMBER 2015

yeshiva. You have convinced me in a few minutes that with your current mindset, you will be unable to achieve success in any yeshiva. You haven’t done that with them yet.”

He then admitted that throughout the past few difficult and stressful months, he had not had one serious conversation with his parents. All dialogue took place in the midst of a shouting match about any one of a host of flashpoints in their relationship.

ROUND TWO

his boys to. He responded with the name of a Brooklyn yeshiva, similar to the one that he attended as a child (I’m not surprised; that is what most “dropout teens” tell me. However, to the public at large, this response would be met with widespread disbelief.)

“Are you aware that your parents are convinced that you are on the path to abandoning an Orthodox lifestyle?” I gently asked him.

“No way. They don’t think that… do they?” was his immediate and passionate response.

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I responded, “You see, when I and your parents - went to yeshiva, dropping out of school was almost immediately followed by an abandonment of Torah and Mitzvos.”

I told him that he would be well served to inform his parents of his ironclad commitment to an observant life, as it would reduce their anxiety greatly - and immeasurably lower the tension level at home. I then advised him to go home, take the telephone off the hook, and to have a long talk with his parents

I changed the subject. “Nice shirt you’re wearing.”

“Thanks.”

“How much did it cost you?”

“Twenty four bucks. It’s a forty dollar shirt, but I got it at a closeout.”

“How many hours did you have to work to pay for that shirt?” I innocently ask.

“Wadda you mean? My parents give me.”

Ignoring the now hostile stare, I informed him that common decency required that so long as he was spending his parents’ money, and eating at their table, he should inform them of his whereabouts when he left home at night, even if they would be annoyed at his choice of destination. A telephone call home before his parents’ bedtime informing them that he was safe, and would be returning home at whatever hour, would help calm their nerves. Additionally, he should be more considerate of his parent’s feelings when engaging in antisocial behavior in or near their home. This last comment drew a swift and passionate response.

“I couldn’t care less what anyone thinks of me!” he forcefully said.

“In that case, why don’t we exchange clothing with each other?” I asked with a smile (I wear traditional Chassidic garb). “If you truly don’t care what people think, it shouldn’t be a problem.” I hammered home the point. “You care greatly what your friends think of you. What you have made peace with is insulting your parents in front of their friends.”

It was clearly time for a break, so I went out, made myself a cup of coffee, and we went for a walk. I asked him what yeshiva he planned to send

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about the many issues we discussed.

SOME POINTERS After he left my house, I called his parents and gave them a quick primer on dealing with their son’s crisis of confidence: • “Ein chovush matir atzmoi mibais asurim” (a prisoner cannot extract himself from his bondage without the assistance of others). Do not hesitate to take advantage of the greatest asset that your community has - its dedicated mechanchim (or lay people) - and find someone whom your son can confide in and speak frankly with. Few teenagers, even in the best of situations, can do this with their parents.

• Establish an ongoing dialogue with him. That includes, but should not be limited to, serious discussions about present yeshiva and/or work possibilities, aspirations for the future, etc.

• Never discuss serious issues during an argument.

• Never, ever, engage in vicious personal attacks on your son’s friends when their names come up during an argument. Firstly, despite your instructions to the contrary, every word that you utter will unquestionably be repeated to that friend. You will have earned yourself a sworn enemy at a time when you need every ally you can get. Additionally, bear in mind that at this stage in your son’s life, he is more closely aligned with his friends than he is with you. By attacking his friends, you are positioning them - and him - on the opposing side of a very formidable fence.

• Do not beat up on yourselves as parents (Where did we go wrong?). This will accomplish nothing productive. The brutal reality is that these situations arise in every type of home and at every income level. More importantly, doing this in front of your son will only add to his feeling of inadequacy.

• After some time has passed, and you have established a working

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relationship, set a firm, but reasonable set of house rules for him, regarding his leaving, and returning, home at night. You will be pleasantly surprised by his response. • Explain to him that you are willing to make some accommodations to meet the needs of his current lifestyle. However, ask him to understand that you have other children, parents, etc. and that he should be considerate of that reality as well. If you are unhappy with the music that he listens to, for example, ask him to close the door to his room, and insist that he wear headphones while the music is playing. • Finally, think positive. The vast majority of these teens outgrow this temporary stage in their lives.

(One is reminded of the classical story of the sixteen-year-old who, after months of tension and fighting with his parents, ran away from home for a period of three years. Upon returning home, he remarked to his close friend that he just could not get over how much his parents matured during the time that he was away). Your son may not become everything that you had originally hoped for him, but he will, with the help of Hashem, grow to be a wonderful adult; a source of nachas to himself, to you, and to Klal Yisroel.

HOPEFUL SIGNS Several weeks later, this young man called me at home to thank me for assisting him. He is currently working part time, attending shiurim at a local yeshiva, and with the help of an accommodating Menahel, working to achieve his High School diploma. He and his parents have spent many hours speaking to each other, and have met several times with their Rav to discuss the many issues at hand. By the way, he adds, things are much less stressful at home now. I smile, and thank the Ribbono Shel Olam for guiding me in formulating the proper responses in helping this young man.

Just as I sit down to eat supper, the telephone rings again‌

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83

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I S R A E L

MVP Award Will Again Be Given to Writey Strikeout Artist and Star of the Pen

By Dov Shurin

Y

es, once again the MVP award will go to the manager of the smallest team on earth, Israel’s “Am Sgula,” that has AGAIN won the world championship.

The game is called life, and it needs to be played by the rules. The rule book is called ‘The Torah,’ as interpreted by the umpires - ‘Chazal,’ in the Medrash, Mishnayos, and Gemarah.

In the second perek of Pirkei Ovos, in the first Mishna, we are asked to ‘SEE’ three things in order to avoid falling into the hands of sin. a) an eye sees. b) and ear hears, and c) all your actions are recorded in a book This means that we should IMAGINE this, because we can’t actually see this. The holy tzadik Reb Yisroel Salanter used to teach that a person should sanctify his IMAGINATION for serving Hashem, and this Medrash is a perfect example of that concept.

When Rosh Hashana comes, preceded by days of saying selichos and doing tshuva, Hashem strikes out our sins of the previous year and the Writey, with perfect control, writes us down for a Happy New Year. He signs it on Yom Kippur, and this earns Him our MVP award, which is presented to Him by a faithful Jewish team when we enter the succah, proving our trust in Him, and waving our lulavim which are secured by our pennant rings.

Anyway, let’s discuss the Great Writer, and His great book, the Holy Torah, which favors the Am Segulah His cherished nation. The way it favors us? If we do tshuva out of fear, our sins are forgiven. But if we do tshuva out of LOVE then our sins become MITZVOS! In Israel, at every army checkpoint, they always stop cars and ask, “Hakol

b’seder?” In order to hear if the driver has an Arabic accent. I always answer with my American Hebrew accent, ‘Hakol b’sefer’ (it’s all in the book) and therefore ‘Hakol b’seder’ (everything is good)!

Because our nation is considered to be ‘Sons of G-d your G-d’(Devorim 14,1), we are treated according to our refined humanistic nature, just like we really are sons of G-d! But, in regard to the nations in general, a violation of one of the seven Commandments for the children of Noach finds them punished more severely, like a servant rather than a son.

It’s so important to consider that our G-d, our MVP, has given us a Book that guides us to truthful decisions in every situation.

An example is found in the words of David Hamelech in Tehilim 149 which we recite daily. “Hodor hu l’chol chasidov Halliluka.” (meaning: ‘this is beautiful to all His followers’).

The verses state: “We have praises of G-d in our throats, and a double edged swords in our hands… to bind kings in chains and important people in metal ropes, in order to judge them according to the ‘Mishpat Kosuv’ (the proper written judgement). Then we declare: This is ‘Hadar’ beautiful. Which part of this do we declare to be beautiful? Is it our praises? The double edged sword? Our victory and revenge?

Or is it for capturing their leaders?

NO! What’s beautiful is that after we capture our bitter enemies we STILL have to judge them according to the ‘Mishpat Kosuv.’ We are not savages. We always follow the Torah! By the Goyim, when they capture their enemies, they torture them savagely and slice them to pieces. We see this all over the world, every day! By us? What is prescribed in the Torah (Mishpat kosuv) we follow.

THIS is what we see as being beautiful!

“Hodor hu l’chol chasidov.”

I had the merit of doing the first night of selichos in Kever Rochel. And afterwards a Chasid, with his tired son holding his hand, started sharing Torahs with me. I told him the chidush which I just wrote. He loved it, and he, too, shared two great teachings with me that will definitely prove that Hashem is the MVP of the game called LIFE. He told me that in Pachad Yitzchok, by the renowned Harav Yitzchok Hutner zt’l, a story is brought of a rich man whose bathroom pipes were stuffed. So he called a plumber who worked for an hour and he handsomely paid him 300 dollars. The worker was happy until he heard the doorbell ring, and in came a shlepper who started listing his troubles to the rich man.

The host took out 3,000 dollars and handed it to the beggar, who left, dancing happily.

The plumber gasped and said, “I worked so hard and got only 300 dollars, and this guy got 3,000?”

The rich man said; “You worked and got paid nicely for your service. The man who came doesn’t have work, is poor and has many needs! What I gave him is with a different cheshbon. I paid you for your work and gave him for his needs.”

So too with selichos. One person comes as a worker. He says every word, he sways back and forth, he fixes what needs to be fixed. He works hard for forgiveness.

Another person comes in and can’t possibly keep up with all the words.

While everyone is working, he’s begging, “Hashem please forgive me, I mamish don’t know what I’m doing.”

Our Strikeout Artist hangs him a curve and he hits a homer, rounding the bases for a happy new year!

I said to him, “Look at your tired son, hanging on to your hand.” I pointed to the child at his side. “Come,” I said.

“In the trunk of my car I have a music album of mine to give him for a present.”

As we walked he topped off my article with the following beautiful story: Once there was a young, disrespectful boy whose father was also his teacher.

So one day, in school, he answered his father with chutzpah and his father slapped him.

When they got home, his son Continued on Page 103

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85

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CONTROVERSY

TODAY’S TOPIC: How do you pay for your child’s wedding?

Shuli: I don’t know how people make these big, fancy weddings without filing for bankruptcy the next day. Do you take out a loan? Remortgage your home? Is this a normal thing to do in the yeshivish world?

And why are the parents paying for this?

Is there a source for this anywhere in Torah, that the parents of the chosson and kallah make them a wedding? Or are the couples paying for it as well?

Is there a reason we don’t make the weddings in a shul or in a home, like a bris or Bar Mitzvah?

I’m trying to figure out how the whole system works, and after being at a few frum weddings (which were all beautiful, by the way) I don’t understand how this is being done. Especially when these parents are also paying tuition for their younger children, seminary, etc.

Popa_bar_abba: When each kid was born we put $5,000 in an investment account, and then we don’t let them get married until it equals $20,000.

Lesschumras: You can’t have it both ways. If you have shidduch dating starting at 19 and neither the boy or girl has worked, how do they pay for even the simplest wedding?

The prevailing custom among many non-Jews is for the couple to save and pay for their own wedding.

Blubluh: I think it’s a really important question. Even in towns where the local Vaad instituted cost caps on such affairs and the community adhered to them, the costs are still very high.

While I do like the idea of putting aside money each year for each child, that takes a lot of commitment and sacrifice (mazal, too) considering other major expenses a family typically faces over the same period, housing and tuition being obvious examples.

I think it will take a lot of courage on the part of well known, respected and wellto-do families to trail-blaze a new approach to weddings and make them less about the pomp and circumstance and more about emotionally supporting the new couple. Once classy, wealthy people make it fashionable, there will be

far less pressure on those of lesser means to over-extend themselves to keep up appearances.

Cherrybim: Some very important items to know if you are worried about paying for weddings: Don’t concern yourself about making a wedding; marriages take place whether the family is dirt poor or wealthy.

When the children are getting engaged, don’t obligate yourself to anything. Inform the parties that the matter needs discussion and you will let them know about the details at a later time.

Concerning support; unless the fellow is a super talmid chochom and learns 24/7, the sacrifice is not worth it.

Poster: Shuli, Boruch Hashem there are many yidden that are very well to do. They have good going businesses and have a lot of money.

I spoke to someone that made a lavish wedding and he told me he doesn’t even feel that he is missing any money now after the wedding. All the money he spent was extra money that he has.

Skripka: I find the simchas that aren’t lavish and fancy and are actually geared towards the chosson and kallah’s enjoyment, rather than the parents’ kovod, to be a lot more enjoyable.

Abba S: Either plan ahead and start saving about $100 a month when the kids are 10, or borrow the money. Take a loan against insurance, second mortgage, etc.

Make a budget and stick to it. Don’t have a fancy wedding, have it during the week when it’s cheaper. Ask about the package deals that include hall, photographer, florist and band for one price. Ask the other parents to chip in.

As far as supporting the newlyweds, if you are having problems paying for the wedding which is $7,000 - $20,000 on the low side, I don’t think you are in a position to support them financially and you should explain it to them.

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RebYidd23: If you have problems paying for the wedding, you shouldn’t be forced to pay.

It’s not your wedding.

From Long Island: I married off 3 daughters. We put aside 10 dollars a week for each (in an envelope, and put into an account every couple of months). You would be surprised how much we accumulated.

While it did not cover the cost of everything, it was a great start.

Shuli: Thanks for the responses, guys.

I would love to see, as someone suggested, a well-to-do/classy family making a simple wedding and setting a trend.

Flyer: Why should the well-to-do make a simple wedding just because you (the not wealthy) think they have to have everything that others do? The same way I tell my kids they don’t need/can’t have a, b, or c - make a wedding within your own budget. There are so many ways today where you can make a wedding within a budget. Yes, you do need some money and it is very hard to save up. I think most of the time it is the parents who want the fancier things by the weddings not the chosson and kallah.

Cherrybim: If my son-in-law is not a serious learner, I’d rather he work and learn. Like I do.

I could use the support money to pay my own bills.

u"ga, hra,

Debater: When will people finally understand that it isn’t the fancy hall, the exotic flowers, the décor or the expensive meal that make a beautiful simcha. It’s the people! I made two chasunas already and I find that whenever I’m surrounded by close family and friends, people who really want to be there and share in my simcha, that’s when the chasuna is most enjoyable for everyone. There’s no reason to spend a fortune and make a lavish event that people in the street, who don’t really make any difference in your life, will talk about all over town. A quieter, simpler event with the people who really count - that’s what makes a simcha wonderful.

Hindsite: In the Chassidishe world, there are takanos that limit the amount of spending.

There are packages that include everything for the night of the chasuna, including flowers, band, photographer and a badchan. It’s a shame that those same takanos were not widely accepted throughout the frum world, as they help a lot to lower the price of the evening. Another Chassidishe custom is for both sides to evenly split the cost of the wedding rather than using the idea of FLOP. Of course, the price of making a wedding is still outrageous, but at least with these takanos in place, there’s a limit to how much one needs to spend to make a beautiful simcha.

Newbie: I personally know of two people who had heart attacks brought on by the stress of having to make a wedding “like the Schwartzes,” without having any money to pay for it. I wish something would change.

Nfgo3: Best way to marry them off: Have only boys and follow the old goyishe practice of requiring the bride’s family to pay.

Second best way: Cash. Most caterers insist on it.

Happy Go Lucky: How to pay for a child’s wedding?

Simple.

If you can cook up a storm, that’s one way. If you can host all the guests on your own, that’s another way. If you can play music for them (and dance too), that will also do.

Technical20: I don’t know, it seems to me that the standards we have nowadays for weddings are outlandish. Why is it necessary to make a wedding with a minimum of 400 people? Why must we make our weddings in halls whose costs fly through the roof?

Why does every event surrounding a wedding - l’chaim, vort, Shabbos kallah, aufruf, sheva brachos - have to be so elaborate and expensive?

Obviously, when I get married, I’m going to want my simcha to be on par with everyone else’s. But, you know what? As I have attended more and more of my friends’ simchos, I have been mentally keeping track of what costs I think are unnecessary and can be cut out. I would keep a wedding small, more intimate, and more focused on the simcha rather than the accoutrements.

And my parents would be absolutely thrilled! I have a friend whose parents forced her to have a wedding in an extremely fancy and pricey hall, just as a show for her father’s business contacts. My parents are low-key and would love to make a small wedding.

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Country Yossi Family Magazine

SEPTEMBER 2015

DREN HEROIC CHIL TELLER - FELDHEIM HANOCH SWEET SOMETHING PASCAL - ARTSCROLL MIRIAM TSCROLL LATTER THE SILVER PGILLETZ, DANIELLA SILVER - AR NORENE

- FELDHEIM DIARY UNFINISHED AIM YITZCHOK WOLGELERNTER RABBI CH S E LANGUAGE OLLOCK M.S THE FIVE LOV APMAN - RABBI MORDECHAI P GARY CH AH LIVING EMUNAVID ASHEAR - ARTSCROLL RABBI D COOKBOOK BAIS YAKOV FELDHEIM OUR HEARTS TSCROLL E IT N U T A H T R STORIES PRUZANSKY - A RABBI BINYOMIN RY FOR YOU O T S G IN Z A ARTSCROLL I HAVE AN AM N SELTZER A M H C A N I B RAB FINGERPRINT REENBAUM - ARTSCROLL CHAIM G

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1. Segulah - Ohad Moskowitz - Aderet 2. Miracles - Pearlman and Neuhaus - Aderet 3. Kol Haneshama Sheli - Benny Friedman - Aderet

1. Simcha Leiner 2 - Yochi Briskman 2. Classics - Shimmy Engel - Nigun 3. Hakol Letova - Yosef Chaim Shwekey

1. Simcha Leiner 2 - Yochi Briskman 2. Project Relax 3 - B. Levine & S. Leiner - Yochi Briskman 3. Inner Flame - 8th Day - Aderet

SEPTEMBER 2015 1. Pianesque - Mendy Portnoy - Yossi Green 2. Simcha Leiner 2 - Yochi Briskman 3. Achakeh Lo - Levy Falkowitz - Avrum Mordche Schwartz

IMPORTANT NOTE These ratings are supplied by the 7 major Jewish music outlets listed here, based on their actual sales over the last thirty days in the Greater New York area.

The list does not reflect total sales of any CD. It does not include sales in other stores, cities or countries (Israel!).

The list is designed to be an indication of what’s currently popular in New York.

Although every effort has been made to ensure fairness and accuracy, this list is published for entertainment purposes only and Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for any inaccuracies or misrepresentations.

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1. Inner Flame - 8th Day - Aderet 2. Hakol Letova - Yosef Chaim Shwekey 3. Bishvili Nivra Haolam - Boruch Sholom Blesofsky - Aderet

1. Pianesque - Mendy Portnoy - Yossi Green 2. Simcha Leiner 2 - Yochi Briskman 3. Segulah - Ohad Moskowitz - Aderet

1. Simcha Leiner 2 - Yochi Briskman 2. Hakol Letova - Yosef Chaim Shwekey 3. Project Relax 3 - B. Levine & S. Leiner - Yochi Briskman

1. Pollyanna - Regal Productions 2. Aldecot - Rachel's Place 3. Itchy and Mitchy - Chofetz Chaim Heritage Foundation

1. Uncle Moishy Vol. 14 - Nigun 2. Aldecot - Rachel's Place 3. Sisters 4: The Challenge - Toby Tessler - Nigun

1. Uncle Moishy Vol. 14 - Nigun 2. Aldecot - Rachel's Place 3. Mitzvah Blvd: Wonders of Hashem Under the Sea - Aderet

SEPTEMBER 2015 1. Pollyanna - Regal Productions 2. Aldecot - Rachel's Place 3. Sisters 4: The Challenge - Toby Tessler - Nigun

IMPORTANT NOTE 1. Rebbetzin Tap 3 - Kerry Bar-Cohn 2. Sisters 4: The Challenge - Toby Tessler - Nigun 3. Mitzvah Boulevard: Bella Brocha - Aderet

1. Pollyanna - Regal Productions 2. Rebbetzin Tap 3 - Kerry Bar-Cohn 3. A Blessing in Disguise - Einhorn & Klein - Teck Productions

1. Uncle Moishy Vol. 14 - Nigun 2. Aldecot - Rachel's Place 3. Mitzvah Blvd: Wonders of Hashem Under the Sea - Aderet

These ratings are supplied by the 7 major Jewish music outlets listed here, based on their actual sales over the last thirty days in the Greater New York area.

The list does not reflect total sales of any DVD. It does not include sales in other stores, cities or countries (Israel!).

The list is designed to be an indication of what’s currently popular in New York.

Although every effort has been made to ensure fairness and accuracy, this list is published for entertainment purposes only and Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for any inaccuracies or misrepresentations.

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H U M O R

Zoology: Boro Park STyle

W

here do you go on Chol Hamoed with your family when they’re crawling on the walls from boredom? To the Bronx Zoo, of course.

And on what day of the week do you and the rest of Boro Park go? On Wednesday, of course. Why? Because it’s free.

That’s right, on Wednesday Chol Hamoed is the only time when the greatest attraction at the Bronx Zoo is not the animals. Maybe this is just me, but I find it extremely exhilarating to see literally thousands of heimishe people storming a zoo and mingling with the monkeys.

It’s always nice when you go somewhere for a trip and the atmosphere is like at home; it makes you feel comfortable. That’s why I like to go to the Bronx Zoo for trips. I actually would not feel welcome at the zoo if I didn’t experience that familiar feel of double and triple parked cars in the zoo parking lot.

What I really love is that as soon as you enter the neighborhood of the zoo you know that you are in the right place. I mean, how often do you see a minivan full of kids with a shtreimel on the dash in the Bronx. Sometimes there may be another hint that you’re nearing your destination. It is usually the occurrence of, at first, a loud summoning honk, followed with a holler of “antchildigt, kent ihr mir efsher zogen vi di zoo iz?”

Now you’ve finally made it to the zoo and you think you’re safe, right?

Well, guess again. Now you have to navigate the separate lanes that take you into the parking lot so you can go

through the booth and hear the man say “Hi and welcome to the Bronx Zoo” for the two thousandth time that day. Is this lane quicker? Is that one quicker? I wonder if they take e-z pass here. Then you see someone’s wife stick her hand out the window right over your car and you hear the husband yelling, “Zoog eim er zull inz arein lozen.” Before you can even think about answering, there’s a minvan right in front of you.

Now you have finally made it in.

You’re in the parking lot. You’re trying to find a spot to park your car. Of course you want to park right at the entrance, just like everyone else. So you start your journey weaving around pop-up succahs, stopping short in front of runaway two-year-olds. The obstacles never end. You are now looking for the entrance. Lo and behold, there it is, somewhere hidden behind about seven rows of cars. Nice try, you think to yourself, until your thought is interrupted by three kids simultaneously screaming for the bathroom. You try to console yourself by thinking of how great it will be to get back to your sixteen-hour workdays next week. You quickly throw the car into reverse and head for the nearest construction site where they hopefully have some portajohns and something close enough to sanity can be restored.

Ok, now everyone is feeling better and the car is parked. The only thing separating you from the zoo is about a two-and-a-half mile trek. You get out all the nosh and dangle it in front of the kids like a carrot in front of a donkey.

You can almost imagine that this ploy might work.

Almost instantaneously, as if with

some uncanny intuition detecting you are almost at your wits end, Rifkie realizes that nothing will challenge your patience and love for her more than if she disappears on you. All of a sudden panic mode kicks in. Family members are running in all directions yelling at the top of their lungs for Rifkie. No, Rifkie of course does not respond to her name being called frantically. Actually, even the elephants from the African section respond quicker than Rifkie with an ear shattering “weeeonk!” Your dear wife Freidel is yelling for you to call the police before Rifkie gets too far. All you are trying to do is keep your cool and try to find your daughter. You decide to take charge of the situation. The first thing you do is yell at your wife and tell her to stop giving ideas.

Now you are in charge. Your next executive order is to have your wife hold onto the rest of your gang. Now all eyes are on you. The alpha male.

The capable patriarch, leader of the clan. The pressure is on. Your wife will keep quiet, but she wants results. Now you have to come through. So you take drastic measures. You hold your yarmulke down onto your head with one hand and you begin to scream at the top of your lungs, “Rifkie, if I don’t see you here in two seconds, you will never leave the house again in your life.” Within half a second Rifkie comes strolling by with the most innocent face you have ever seen. Beet red and holding off a heart attack, you ask in a pseudo-controlled voice, “Where on earth were you?” Without batting an eye, and with a look of innocence, Rifkie responds, “You were looking for me? I was with my friend. Could

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you believe it, Esty is here too? She came all the way from Lakewood.”

Ok, now you are planning your trip back to Boro Park. What! You realize, you’re not done yet, you can’t leave. Why not? Because you didn’t even go into the zoo yet.

You enter the zoo. All of a sudden you feel yourself being pick-pocketed.

It’s your kids; they want money for the train, for the sky-ride, for the butterflies. But I thought this place was free?

That’s why I came here. Welcome to reality. You get taken for eighty bucks at the free Bronx Zoo. But don’t worry, nobody wants you to come along with them, they just want to be treated to the rides. You ask in a naive voice, “Hey that looks like fun…” Before you can even finish your sentence, your kids all answer in unison, “Ta, you’re too big for this. Why don’t you come and find us at the other side of the zoo when we’re finished.”

By now you are looking for a friend to run off with. Another father that has had it already. No such luck.

You are fantasizing about being eaten by the tigers. For some reason it seems like a peaceful end to you at this point.

Ok, the kids have finished their rides and all the money. They have all eaten and used the rest room and are ready for you to take them around now.

It’s time to have fun. Where do you go first? To the tigers, of course. Because every Jewish kid loves to see an oversized kitten rip apart some meat. So you push your way through, all the

way up to the glass. You are met by the deafening noise of two-hundred kids pounding on the glass trying to get the tigers’ attention. You say a quick tefillah that the glass doesn’t shatter and that you don’t become tiger food.

You put your little sheffelech on your shoulder so that they can see every little drop of blood pour out of the tiger’s piece of meat. You hear a kid saying to his friend, “You think this is something, you should have been here last year, boy was the tiger fressing then.”

You show your kids Hashem’s handiwork, and their reaction to this is something you can never forget. They are on shoulders holding on to your head, your hair, your face, and every time the tiger just sways in your direction, you get clawed by them.

Ok, time to move on. On to the predatory birds, another toddler favorite. The mammoth-like birds are oblivious to the chaos going on around them. All they are focusing on is the nice white mice that they are ripping apart. You hear your wife tell your kids, “You see that bird, he’s eating up all of his hommies. He’s not going to leave anything over. Right you’ll eat up all your food next time?” You almost get sick, you think you have finally figured out what that was that she served you for supper last Tuesday.

Now, off to the giraffes. You have every kid ripping branches off the pine trees to feed the giraffes. This is all despite a big sign that says in bold black letters, “DO NOT FEED THE GI-

u"ga, hra,

RAFFES.” That must be just a suggestion, you think. Probably because the zoo doesn’t want you to work too hard.

Wow, what nice considerate people.

It’s almost midnight, even the monkeys are vomiting from all the visitors and the ensuing chaos by now. It’s time to go. Or maybe not. “But Totty, we haven’t seen the this or the that, we can’t leave yet.”

“We are leaving and that’s all!” you say with your toughest, most authoritative voice. And guess what?

Two hours later you actually do leave the zoo. Who said you weren’t the boss.

You drag all your kids into the car and seat-belt them in. Before you can even start the motor, you get this feeling of alone-ness. All of a sudden you hear the peaceful, soothing sound of six children and a wife snoring. For one brief, fleeting moment, you contemplate taking the train home. But then you realize how lucky you are to have such a beautiful family that is there for you in every way and to insure that you don’t maintain any resemblance to that young man in your chasunah pictures who got married only nine short years ago.

Chaptzem is a heimishe blogger that authors the Chaptzem Blog, the most popular heimishe website. The Chaptzem Blog has been quoted many times in the mainstream media and is viewed by thousands daily. www.chaptzem.blogspot.com

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H U M O R Goodbye Kiss

from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in.

Noticing them before I did, Moshe whispered, “It’s no use, Tatty. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights.”

P.B. Boro Park

I was in the bathroom, putting on my makeup under the watchful eyes of my young granddaughter, as I’d done many times before. After I applied my lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, “But Bobby, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!” I will probably never put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye.

K.R. Flatbush

Living in Terminal A A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived. “Oh,” he said, “she lives at the airport, and when we want her, we just go get her. Then, when we’re done having her visit, we take her back to the airport.”

K.O. Lakewood

Forever Young A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like. “We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods.”

The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, “I sure wish I’d gotten to know you sooner!”

J.G. Flatbush

Some Compliment

NO FEAR A few minutes before shul started, the members of the congregation were sitting on the benches and talking. Suddenly, the Suttun appeared at the front of the shul.

Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate.

Soon the shul was empty except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his seat without moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that the Suttun was in his presence.

So the Suttun walked up to the man and said, ‘Do you know who I am?’

The man replied, ‘Yep, sure do.’

‘Aren’t you afraid of me?’ the Suttun asked.

‘Nope, sure ain’t.’ said the man.

‘Don’t you realize I can kill you with one word?’ asked the Suttun.

‘Don’t doubt it for a minute,’ returned the old man, in an even tone.

‘Did you know that I can cause you profound, horrifying AGONY for all eternity?’ persisted the Suttun.

‘Yep,’ was the calm reply.

‘And you are still not afraid?’ asked the Suttun.

‘Nope,’ said the old man.

More than a little perturbed, the Suttun asked, ‘Why aren’t you afraid of me?’

The man calmly replied, ‘Been married to your sister for 48 years.’

My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, “Bubby, do you know how you and Hashem are alike?”

I mentally polished my halo and I said, “No, how are we alike?”

“You’re both old,” he replied.

H.Y. Boro Park

Battery Operated Bugs When my grandson Moshe and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep

The Hero Walking down the street, I saw 6 men attacking my shvigger.

My wife asked me, “Won’t you go help?”

I said, “Nah, 6 is enough.”

S.C. Flatbush

Brainwaves A man buying a radio asked the blonde saleslady, “Where was it manufactured?”

She answered, “Uh - it says right here: Built in antenna.”

Y.B. Boro Park

Send your true anecdotes, embarrassing moments, bright sayings, real life experiences, or any interesting incident relating to Jewish life in America to: COUNTRY YOSSI MAGAZINE, 1310 48th Street, Brooklyn, New York 11219. All printed submissions will receive free tapes or another valuable prize. Winners should bring legal I.D. PRIZES WILL NOT BE MAILED

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H U M O R

S

o - how did you enjoy our rainy summer? I was invited to four barbeques and each one was cancelled on account of rain. I’m sick of Walmart! I’m sick of Shoprite! I’m tired of creeping into a damp bed. I’m tired of waiting for twelve pairs of smelly sneakers to dry out.

I’m tired of clean clothes falling into a filthy puddle of water as I remove it from the washer or dryer, and my husband is tired of looking for a ride home on Sunday night.

I fail to understand why people can’t give you a straight answer when you ask them a simple question like, “when are you leaving?”

“Weeeellll - I’m not so sure when I’m leaving - I may go before Mincha, after Mincha, before Maariv, after Maariv, very early tomorrow, very late tonight, I may have a full car, my wife may be sending back some things...” (the second week??)

One guy actually had the key in the ignition and was slamming the car door shut when my husband ran over to him and asked, “Are you leaving to the city?”

“Weeellll - I’m not sure - I may stop on the way...” (Where, on the bridge??)

I ended up borrowing a car and driving my husband over to a friend who took him home.

This friend just bought a beautiful four bedroom bungalow with a huge kitchen and deck. My bungalow looks like an outhouse in comparison.

“So,” I asked, “How was your first summer as an owner?” I was sorry I asked.

First of all, when they came up, they discovered their bungalow had been broken into during the winter.

They had to replace a hi-riser, washer-dryer and refrigerator.

No sooner did they settle in,

when the guests started to arrive.

First her parents came for a week, then her in-laws. Then her sister with nine kids, including one set of triplets, age one. Then her sister-inlaw came with three kids. Then the great Tanta Dinka came in from out of town. Then the next door neigh-

ANOTHER KAYL A CL ASSIC

tually counting the days to go home so that she can “relax.”

But me, being the good friend that I am, reminded her what’s waiting for her back home.

First comes all the unpacking.

Did you ever notice how you don’t have space to put anything away? It all fit into a two room bungalow, so how come it won’t fit into our large homes?

Then starts the shopping for shoes, clothes, school supplies, sheitel appointments, doctor and dentist appointments and before you turn around, Yom Tov is here and it’s time to put up the Succah.

Do you remember the old Succahs? They were made out of a million different doors or just wood, and you hung up sheets to cover the walls? Remember when all the decorations were made of colored crepe paper and when it rained, the colors ran and stained the walls? Remember when a small decoration cost a quarter and you splurged and spent a dollar?

Remember making decorations in school for free?

You either made a chain out of colored paper, or a lantern. So what if it fell apart in the first rain - you knew next year you would make another one.

Not anymore! Today, right away the teacher sends home a note to send in ten dollars for a “special” Succos project. Me, personally, I feel that for the tuition I’m paying, they should send me ten dollars!

But the truth of the matter is they bring home a stunning decoration. Some of them are even laminated and we use it from year to year. So what if I have ten b’ruchim habaim signs and six mizrach signs hanging! The kids are happy and that makes me happy.

Ah k’siva v’chasima tova and a sweet new year to all!

K ay l a Kuchle f fe l

HOME SWEET HOME bor from the city came and brought along two friends for company.

Then the newlywed daughter and son-in-law came, then her other married daughter came and left her baby for a week while she and her husband went on a little vacation. To top things off, the baby got sick and was up crying all night. Then the machatonim came.

She was busy changing linen and doing laundry all week. Everybody took showers twice a day and she had to go and buy another dozen bath towels.

And the shopping!! The checkout clerk asked her if she’s running a day camp!! She bought canned food in jumbo sizes. Her husband got a killa from shlepping soda and seltzer. She would spend half-anhour in the cereal aisle deciding which one to buy and then another half-hour by the Entenmann’s and Freihoffer’s aisle. At night she plops into bed exhausted. She’s ac-

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SEPTEMBER 2015

Jonathan Rosenblum… Continued from Page 63 minimal requirements for a tenable Fars agency reported, the final agreedeal. The fact that each has been total- ment met all of Supreme Leader ly reversed demonstrates what a great Khameini’s requirements, including the full removal of the arms embargo deal this is for Iran’s Supreme Leader.

A bipartisan group of American and all economic, financial, and diplomats, legislators, policymakers banking sanctions, and the removal of and experts - including former CIA Di- all previous UN Security Council rector David Petraeus, State Depart- Resolutions relating to Iran’s nuclear ment nuclear proliferation expert program.

Stephen Hayes points out that the Robert Einhorn, Dennis Ross, who oversaw Iran policy in Obama’s first Iranians gained a wish list of all their term, and Gary Samore, Obama’s for- policy objectives: international legitmer chief advisor on nuclear policy - imization of a rogue state, a massive issued a statement on June 24 setting shift of power to an aggressive state forth the minimum standards for an ac- sponsor of terror, the strengthening of ceptable agreement. Those conditions the mullahs’ hold on power, and fully tracked the initial American stance, sanctioned nuclear threshold status.

Somewhere along the way, acand none of them were achieved.

They listed five conditions: any- cording to former CIA director Haytime, anywhere inspections; full dis- den, the President’s mantra went from closure by Iran of previous weaponiza- “no deal is better than a bad deal” to tion efforts; sanctions relief must begin “any deal is better than no deal.” And only after the IAEA certifies that Iran that’s what we got. “Any deal.” Once has fully complied with its commit- again, “process” took over, until the ments; the deal must last for decades; worst nightmare for American negotiaand Iran must fully dismantle its nu- tors was that Iran might say no. So we made them an offer they couldn’t reclear infrastructure.

Instead, as Iran’s semi-official fuse - their entire wish list.

u"ga, hra,

Shuirn… Continued from Page 84 again acted disrespectfully, and his father shook his finger at him, hugged him and said, “Now, now, my child, that’s no way to act!”

His son was baffled and asked, “When I said that to you in school, you slapped me. And now you were so nice?”

His father answered, “Yes, because in school I am your teacher. And that’s the way a teacher acts. Here at home I’m your father!”

The son, looking very serious, then said, “Dad, I have a problem at school that I think you can help me with.”

“What is it?” asked his father.

“Could you possibly come to my school with me tomorrow and ask my teacher to treat me more like a father than like a teacher?”

As we say in selichos, ‘K’rachem av al bonim.’ Like a father has pity on his son, so too, Hashem, have pity on us. In other words, don’t strike us, Hashem, just strike away our sins!

Kesiva v’chasima tova. dovshurin@yahoo.com

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JUMPSTART EARLY INTERVENTION...........(718) 853-9700 ................................35

AD ART PRESS ..............................................(718) 438-7200 ................................58

KATZ TRIMMING.............................................(718) 436-5198 ................................67

ALEXANDRA’S SALON AND SPA.................(718) 438-5114 ................................74

KAUFMAN’S DESIGN JEWELRY ..................(718) 871-3575 ................................21

ALL-STATE MOTOR VEHICLES ....................(718) 436-5956 ................................45

KING’S COUNTY AUTO BODY ......................(718) 339-9500 ................................91

ALLSTATE INSURANCE ................................(718) 859-7900 ................................14

KOBY’S TRANSPOTOURS INC.....................(800) 872-5629 ................................97

AMBIT..............................................................(845) 525-5511 ................................71

KOLLEL CHIBAS YERUSHALAYIM...............(718) 633-7112 ..................................9

ARI RENT A CAR............................................(718) 513-3838....Outside Back Cover

KUPAT HA’IR...................................................(866) 221-9352 ......Inside Front Cover

BETH SHIFRA.................................................(718) 449-1397 ................................88

LAYETTE 4 LESS............................................(917) 710-2021 ................................87

BORO PARK AUTO BODY.............................(718) 435-5556 ..............................103

LEITMAN WATCH REPAIR.............................(718) 744-7711 ................................55

BORO RUG AND CARPET.............................(718) 853-3600 ................................43

MATERNICHIC MATERNITY ..........................(718) 258-6193 ................................41

BRANDS..........................................................(917) 893-8300 ..................................6

MEAL MART OF AVE M .................................(718) 998-0800 ................................79

CHESED CENTER ..........................................(347) 837-8256 ................................82

MEFOAR..........................................................(718) 436-0707 ................................46

CHINA GLATT .................................................(718) 438-2576 ................................36

MEIR KESSLER,RPA-C ..................................(718) 252-9066 ................................13

COUTURE OFF THE RACK ...........................(347) 404-7737 ................................25

MILLER’S LOCKSMITH..................................(347) 613-0546 ................................42

DELUXE PASSPORT EXPRESS....................(718) 387-5441 ..................................8

MOFIT ..............................................................(347) 439-7760 ................................42

DJYITZY ..........................................................(347) 598-6780 ................................58

NY iPHONE REPAIR.......................................(718) 677-4343 ................................87

DO-ALL TRAVEL ............................................(718) 972-6000 ..................................1

OZER NEUMAN OPTICIANS..........................(718) 435-1253 ................................94

DR STEVEN DAVIDOWITZ.............................(718) 376-1606 ................................47

PEDULLA CERAMIC TILES ...........................(718) 377-7746 ..................................4

DR. MELINDA KELLER ..................................(718) 854-9292 ................................39

PIZZA PLUS ....................................................(718) 377-4992 ................................11

DR. TABICK.....................................................(718) 745-8177 ................................28

POWERHOUSE...............................................(347) 432-4141 ................................83

DROP SMOKE.................................................(513) 273-7671 ..................................6

QUALITY CARPET..........................................(718) 941-4200 ................................85

EMERYL BRIDAL............................................(718) 972-1860 ................................82

RATZON PROGRAM.......................................(718) 258-5391 ................................51

EUROPEAN CLOSET & CABINET ................(800) 640-2567 ................................40

RENAH APPLIANCE REPAIR ........................(718) 694-0900 ................................39

EXPEDITE PASSPORT...................................(718) 782-4700 ................................30

SHAKLEE ........................................................(718) 851-9478 ................................97

EZRAS YISROEL ............................................(718) 877-4644 ................................23

SHIRTS PLUS .................................................(718) 252-4488 ................................69

FASTPORT PASSPORT .................................(877) 910-7277 ................................82

SIMONE’S WIGS.............................................(718) 339-5616 ................................29

FIT ME .............................................................(718) 375-6666 ................................68

SLEEPTIGHT BEDDING.................................(718) 438-3933 ................................98

FLORIDA GRILL .............................................(305) 535-6077 ................................58

SMILING HERBS.............................................(347) 546-2792 ................................27

FREE MY MILES .............................................(516) 569-3257 ................................16

SURGICAL SOCK SHOP II.............................(718) 436-7880 ................................38

FREUND’S FISH..............................................(718) 438-3773 ................................31

TABLE PADS...................................................(917) 776-7371 ................................80

GALINA’S CUSTOM DESIGN.........................(718) 252-2138 ................................66

THE FAMILY DRUG STORE ...........................(845) 794-2345 ................................65

GANEINU.........................................................(718) 377-1770 ................................73

THE WINE BARREL .......................................(718) 436-1031 ................................20

GEMACH ROFEH............................................(888) 623-8854 ................................80

THE WINERY...................................................(718) 436-3323 ................................15

GLATT MART ..................................................(718) 338-4040 ................................18

TRAFFIC VIOLATIONS ...................................(917) 988-5800 ................................42

GOLDSTEIN PRESS.......................................(718) 252-5685 ................................41

W.W.& SONS...................................................(718) 633-4540 ................................59

GREATER WINDOW AND DOOR ..................(718) 972-2626 ......Inside Back Cover

WHOOPI ..........................................................(718) 853-5411...............................100

HAIR DESIGN ACADEMY ..............................(800) 944-4966 ................................81

WILLIAMSBURG SEWING & VACUUM.........(718) 384-0851 ................................22

HATS PLUS .....................................................(718) 377-5050 ................................28

WISHES ....................................................................................................................70

HI-TECH 2000 .................................................(718) 851-7300 ................................10

YAD L’ACHIM ..................................................(866) 923-5224 ................................32

J DRUGS .........................................................(718) 258-6686 ..................................5

YERACHMIEL BEGUN & THE MBC ..............(718) 998-4972 ................................17

JAMIE BEAUTY SUPPLY CORP. ...................(718) 258-6968 ..................................2

YITZCHAK WEISSMAN ..................................(347) 522-3272 ................................12

JCC MP ...........................................................(718) 407-1832 ................................44

YOUR TOP PRIORITY ....................................(718) 853-1576 ................................13

JCC SIMCHA HALL ........................................(718) 407-1832 ..............................102

ZELDA’S ART WORLD ...................................(718) 377-7779 ................................49

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