CY Family Mag #203 by Country Yossi

SUMMER 2016

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SUMMER 2016

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Message From the Publisher Hi Everybody, With summer now officially here, we are all busily preparing for two months of fun and excitement. But for many the summer season is filled not with joy and sunshine, but with sadness and frustration. For those desperately seeking their zivug, the long days and sleepless nights seem interminable. But now there’s hope! Yad L’Achim has arranged for a minyan of Talmidei Chachamim to pray in Amuka, the resting place of Reb Yonasan ben Uziel, for all those who contribute to pidyon shvuyim (redeeming of captives)! This tefillah will be recited on the noted day of segulah for shidduchim - Tu B’Av! If this applies to you I encourage you to join the many whose bakashos were answered after last year’s tefillah. Elsewhere in this sizzling issue, R’ Berel Wein discusses a sweltering summer in Yerushalayim, R’ Emanuel Feldman whips out his thesaurus and Y. Menken goes bananas about the gorilla megillah! Our Real Life section features a heartwarming Holocaust love story and, in a stunning expose, we reveal why a rabbi wore jeans and a wig! In his Short Vort, R’ Ron Yitzchok Eisenman finally answers the

eternal question: Where is Hashem? In our beloved Torah department, R’ Pynchas Brener and Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss offer valable insights and wise counsel. In a startling and frightening Special Report we analyze the resurgence of virulent anti-Semitism in Germany! As George Santayana once said, “Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it!” ch’v. Our Health and Advice section bubbles over with uncommon common sense and, in keeping with our shidduch motif, Jewish World Review kindly supplied us with a penetrating analysis of the shidduch conundrum. Dov Shurin shares his unique perspective and the Yeshiva World News Coffee Room offers some truly dark roast as they discuss: Who is worse - Trump or Clinton? Our award-winning literature section features an excellent excerpt from Meir Wikler’s new book, “Wikler Classics.” You just might learn something! Wishing you all a happy, healthy and altogether wonderful summer. Your friend,

Counry Yossi

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ISSUE 203

“New York’s Premier Jewish Magazine”

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“A closed mouth gathers no feet!” – CY Summer 2016 /u"ga, ct-zun,

Table of Contents

Volume 29 Number 2

LET’S SHMOOZE ...................................................................................................................................................................................27 COVER STORY • Yad L’Achim: Tu B’Av: Segula for Shidduchim . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32 SOUND OFF • Motherless, by Miriam Weiser . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46 • Please Help! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47 • Life of a Democracy. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48 OPINION • The Thesaurus Problem, by Rabbi Emanuel Feldman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50 • Gone to the Gorillas, by Yaakov Menken . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52

• Summertime, by Rabbi Berel Wein . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54 • The Short Vort: Where is Hashem? by Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56 INSPIRATION.........................................................................................................................................................................................58 TORAH • Never Again with Teeth, by Rabbi Pynchas Brener. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60 • A Sample of Wisdom from the Orchos Chaim l’Harosh, by Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62 FUN PAGE ................................................................................................................................................................................................64 REAL LIFE • A Holocaust Love Story, by Rabbi Yosef Wallis . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72 • When a Rabbi Wore Jeans and a Wig, by Hillel Fendel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 74

HEALTH AND ADVICE • Dear Bubby . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76 • Misunderstood, by Sheri Toiv-Ellenberg, LMHC . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77 • Man-Up! by I.M. Gerecht . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 78 SPECIAL REPORT • A Gentile’s View of Today’s Germany, by William E. Grim . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 82 ISRAEL • 33 Years of Heaven on Earth, by Dov Shurin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 90 TIMELINE ................................................................................................................................................................................................92 FELDER FOCUS .....................................................................................................................................................................................93 CONTROVERSY

• YWN Coffee Room: Who’s Worse - Trump or Clinton? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 94 JEWISH BOOKS • Book Excerpt: Wikler Classics, by Dr. Meir Wikler . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 96 • Top 10 in Jewish Books . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 97 JEWISH MUSIC • Top 3 in Jewish Music . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 100 • CY Songbook: A Boy Named Zlata . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 103 HUMOR • Summertime Fun, by Chaptzem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 104 • Can’t You Just Plotz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 107 • Who Started This Mishugas? by Kayla Kuchleffel. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 109

COUNTRY YOSSI FAMILY MAGAZINE • 1310 48th Street, Suite 308 • Brooklyn, New York 11219 Telephone: (718) 851-2010 • Email Address: country@countryyossi.com COPYRIGHT © 2016 - Country Yossi Family Magazine, Inc. All rights reserved. Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for unsolicited submissions. Unsolicited manuscripts, photographs, and other submitted materials must be accompanied by a stamped self-addressed envelope. We reserve the right to print all letters in part or in full unless specifically requested otherwise. No articles, photographs, artwork or other material in this magazine may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever, without prior written permission of the publisher. Country Yossi Family Magazine will not be responsible for typographical errors or advertisers’ claims.

Cover Design: R.A. Stone

website: www.countryyossi.com Follow countryyossi on Twitter

Interior Layout: H. Walfish

GOTCHA! Dear Country Yossi, A rabbi told his congregation, “Next week I plan to give a shiur about the evils of lying. To help you understand my speech, I want you all to read Shemos chapter 41.” The following Shabbos, as he prepared to deliver his shiur, the rabbi asked for a show of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Shemos Perek 41. Every hand went up. The rabbi smiled and said, “Shemos has only 40 chapters. I will now proceed with my shiur about lying.” S.N. Flatbush

“May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?” Moishe licked his ice cream cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game’s over!!” H. S. Boro Park

FROM LIBBY

BARBERSHOP Dear Country Yossi, I was getting a haircut when a young boy entered the barbershop and the barber whispered into my ear: “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.” The barber put a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other. Then he called the boy. “Moishe, come over here. Which of these do you want?” Moishe took the quarters and left. “What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!” Later, when I left, I saw the same young boy Moishe coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, Moishe!” I yelled.

anorexics and Sukkos is for the homeless. Simchas Torah is for those in their happier stages of bipolar. Mi K’Amcha Yisroel! And people still wonder why the Jews invented psychology! M.B. Flatbush

YOM TOV HEALS ALL Dear Country Yossi, Jewish holidays are for people with illnesses: Purim is for alcoholics. Pesach is for OCDs. Shavuos is for insomniacs, and Lag B’omer is for pyromaniacs who weren’t satisfied with Chanuka. Tisha B’Av is for manic depressives and Rosh Hashana is for people who obsess over dying. Yom Kippur is for

Dear Country Yossi, My name is Libby but I know that many of you only know me as Liba Yehudis bas Yocheved. I am a 16-year-old 10th grader in Prospect Park Yeshiva high school and in a hospital bed in the pediatric ICU at Weil Cornell Medical Center in Manhattan. I have been here for almost four weeks, though I don’t remember much of it. My parents have told me that since my episode, many people in our community and throughout the world have davened for me and kept me in their thoughts and tefilos. I also learned that many people have done things as a zchus for me to have a refuah shelaimah. I never knew so many people in Klal Yisroel loved me. That makes me really happy. I am thankful to so many people: the great doctors and wonderful nurses who are taking care of me, and my family and friends who have been by my side. But I am also thankful to all the people like you, whom I can’t see, who have helped me get better. As I lie here, all that I keep on thinking is how grateful we

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should be for what Hashem gives us. Enjoy and live life to the fullest. Don’t take it for granted. And smile. Also, people in hospitals enjoy visitors. It’s really the nicest thing. Please continue to daven for me to have a refuah shelaimah. You’ve helped me come this far, but I know I still have a long way to go. Sincerely, Libby P.S.: After this experience, I promised my parents that I would never put them in a nursing home.

HOLY DAY INN Dear Country Yossi, I received this before Yom Tov and thought your readers would enjoy it! Looking forward to having your married children come for Pesach? Holy Day Inn We wish to extend a warm welcome to our seasonal guests (married children) from far and near. The following regulations have been provided

by the management in order to eliminate all confusion that may arise during your stay. 1. Due to our chambermaid’s current indisposition, guests are respectfully requested to make their own beds and maintain premises in an orderly fashion. Towels which are found on the bathroom floor will regretfully stay there for the duration of your stay. 2. Due to our maintenance manager having reached retirement age with all its physical limitations, the job of garbage technician is open to all able-bodied males. The usual requirements of a college degree or semichah will be waived under the circumstances. The job description only calls for a willingness to notice overflowing receptacles and a sense of direction to find the trash cans located in the front of the building. 3. Since our expertise is not cheese manufacturing, management reserves the right to dispose of bottles found under the sofa, cribs and other obscure places. 4. When serving matzah, please consider that other residents might not like crunch underfoot. Our professional architects and designers have planned the space so that every few steps you will find a broom and mop to alleviate the snap-crackle-pop situation created by multiple breakfast shifts. 5. Those males or females making use of the diapering center are kindly requested to properly dispose of the diapers etc. as a courtesy to fellow guests. 6. Spacious playing space has been provided in the nearby parks. Our local employment agency has informed us that currently there is a shortage of toy picker-uppers in the job market. Each family is kindly requested to designate a responsible person to retrieve and reorganize the recreational objects before other guests sink and drown in them. 7. A vast library has been created on premises for your reading and learning pleasure. Since our current librarian is on strike, patrons are advised to return items to

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proper shelves. 8. Please note that our hotel is located in a retirement community. Noise levels must never exceed deafening levels. Violation of the above will result in the breakdown of frazzled nerves of the residents. 9. The kugel in the oven has been provided for your gustatory pleasure. Please be aware, however, that more than one piece per hour might be hazardous to your health. 10. ‘Do Not Disturb’ signs are not available at our hotel. The management has endeavored to provide our guests with every modern comfort and convenience. We hope your stay will be a very pleasant one and we look forward to hosting you again in the future. Gut Yom Tov. With love, Your devoted parents

cially good when it comes to spreading Torah. My sons and I sent each other vertlach each day of Chanukah and throughout the Purim and Pesach seasons, regarding each of those holidays. My daughters like to receive interesting Torah ideas and stories as well. When used correctly, to help others and spread the right information, a cell phone can become a Torah and chesed machine! P.H. Flatbush

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THE DEEP MEANING OF PARKING PROBLEMS Dear Country Yossi, One of the top topics on New Yorkers’ minds is their problem with parking. It’s hard to have a gathering of family or friends where that subject does not come up. So I got to wondering what it’s all about. We know Hashem is precise in the challenges that He sends us, so what message is He sending from all this obsession with parking? When Chazal dissect an

A TEXT FROM TATTY PART II Dear Country Yossi, In the first part of this letter, published in the Pesach issue of Country Yossi Magazine, I extolled the benefits of texting - especially to one’s children - in order to enhance that relationship. Now I would like to write about some rules of texting which I find necessary so that the phone does not come to control us or abuse us. Firstly: never text while walking in the street. It is dangerous, not respectful, and can cause a chillul Hashem. If you must, move over to the side of the sidewalk, by the curb or buildings, and do it there. Second, if you are having a texting conversation and for some reason you couldn’t respond in a reasonable time at one point, you should apologize and explain the delay. The person is waiting for your response and is wondering what happened to you. Third, I prefer to write out words completely and make an effort to spell correctly. That shows respect to your texting partner and it keeps precision alive - something that affects everything you do. It’s important to do things correctly and thoroughly. The medium of texting is espe-

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issue they always visit the middah kineged middah factor. What is caused by an elusive parking space? Aggravation, time loss, gas loss, lateness, fights over spots and more. Hashem is giving us an opportunity to correct our middos in these areas. Do we aggravate other people? Are we wasting time or resources? Do we come late to davening, to a shiur, to a wedding, to a funeral? Do we provoke fights with our spouses, our neighbors, coworkers, employees, fellow shul-goers or Rabbis? If you answered no to all of the

above, you probably don’t have parking problems. You are also probably a malach because to avoid these shortcomings takes a lot of effort in selfcontrol and middos-building. However, that’s exactly the point. Hashem is forcing us to take a good look at ourselves through our parking experiences so that we get cracking at improving ourselves and those around us. Another symptom of this daily regimen is circling around and around to find that spot. Don’t we do the same

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when Yom Kippur comes and we make promises to Hashem? Soon enough, we have circled right back to where we were, unchanged, unholy. You may ask: If this is a true evaluation of the situation, then why are out-of-towners free from all this parking madness? It could very well be that we can learn something from our outof-town brothers and sisters. Their slower, softer pace of life may include qualities that we need to cultivate. Something to think about while you’re looking for a spot… T. N. Boro Park

LESSONS LEARNED FROM A CAT Dear Country Yossi, You already published a few letters I wrote titled “Pet Peeved,” about our experience with a family of cats that came into our lives. It’s been about three years since that all started and I wanted to update that story. The mother cat, which we named Greyka (Russian for Grey) had three litters of offspring: first six kittens, then five, then four. From all of those, there are still three hanging around our backyard. Two are unfriendly and one is friendly enough to even bring him into our house so the mice stay in their holes. Just like everything else that Hashem created, this cat teaches us many lessons in life. The Gemara says that we can learn tznius from cats because they are private and they cover their messes with dirt. We also should aim to lead a clean life, shameful of exposing what’s private. I observed another thing from Blaika (Russian for Black), a kitten from the first litter. He is very patient when waiting for his food. He will meow, rub up against my legs, lie on the floor, look me right in the eye and wait. If he doesn’t get food he eventually just walks away. But the most important thing we can learn from cats is the way they take precautions against danger. Before they eat or drink they take a few sniffs to make sure it’s fresh. When they hear noise they freeze and listen to determine if a predator is lurking.

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This teaches us how we must be vigilant against the Yetzer Hara. We must sniff him out before we proceed with whatever we’re doing; listen carefully for danger before we act. Maybe then we can also have nine lives? L.C.R. Flatbush

HOSTING A HOST Dear Country Yossi, This past Yom Tov I had the opportunity to be a guest for some of the meals. Normally I would be on the other side of the table, literally, by hosting others at my own home. That’s why this experience was so important. It has been a while since I came as a guest to people who are not family members. The opportunity just didn’t present itself. But this Pesach, I worked as a mashgiach and my wife worked elsewhere so the schedule for the night meals found me eating by others. It is good for all hosts to do this once in a while so we can all review and update our hachnosas orchim. I have tremendous gratitude to my hosts for their generosity and I truly thank them for taking me in. But that being said, there are some things I would like to point out so we can all learn what to do, and what not to do when we have guests. I realized that, when holding a conversation with your guests, one should never let the topic go off into personal family information that the guest would rather not reveal. Also, don’t discuss people, places or memories that the guest is not privy to, or he will feel left out. This puts the guest outside the discussion and makes him feel uncomfortable. Instead, ask the guest direct questions so that he feels you’re interested in him. Obviously, those questions should be very general so the guest doesn’t feel like he’s being interrogated.

It is cute to focus on a baby or a child at the table, but not for too long or guests will feel ignored. Besides, a youngster cannot add much depth to the conversation so you are bringing everyone down to infant or toddlerlevel. Instead, move on to other, more stimulating topics. As far as the food goes, please make sure it circulates well when you’re doing things buffet-style. A guest may be shy to take too much so he’ll take less than he really wants. Pass the serving plate around more

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than once and encourage the guest to eat a lot so he feels comfortable taking more. Refill the serving plate so he knows there is more left for others too. Most importantly, have a potpourri of divrei Torah streaming from your table so your guest comes away not only gastronomically, but also spiritually satisfied. In appreciation to all who perform the mitzvah of hachnosas orchim, J.F. Five Towns

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COVER STORY

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u"ga, ct-zun,

SOUND OFF

Motherless By Miriam Weiser

any amazing and remarkable things have happened over the last year and a half in my immediate family and only some of them good. I suppose I should be feeling confused, to say the least. I suppose I should be feeling sad and melancholy. Many people would, in my circumstances, snuggle under a blanket and shut the mean world out. Many would hurt, physically. I always thought I would be the type to hurt badly, to be unable to raise my voice in song ever again; to hate the sunshine in the morning and cry again with the darkness at night. I thought I would weep uncontrollably for an endless amount of time, until after a while, as the hurt slowly abated, I would crawl back to humanity and continue to be where I was needed. I would do what I was expected to do. But that is not the case. It seems I crave normalcy. I have a need, now more than ever, to live my life the way I’ve always dreamed. A few months ago my mother passed away at the golden age of 65, after an eighteen-months-long battle with brain cancer. A few short months before that, my nephew, at age 12, lost his battle with some rare disease. During these unbearable times, I married off my first child and also gave birth to a baby boy. Amidst tears and prayer, frustration and serious discussion, we had blessings and mazel tovs, more tears and laughter. Confused? Yeah. I have anger in me. I don’t want to hear about other people’s tragedies. I don’t want to hear sad stories of death or sickness.

I’ve had enough of all that. I am not angry at anyone per se. I am just disinterested. I also have a fear always niggling in the pit of my stomach. A fear of medical symptoms in my children, in my husband or in me. That headache evokes inconceivable thoughts. This foot pain brings forth an unusually creative and frightening imagination. It could be anything. Hopefully it’s just strep. Hopefully the pain goes away and it turns out to be nothing. But what is it then? I conjecture. What if there’s something brewing in the body and this pain, this symptom, is just a warning that if ignored, could turn into something horrifying. For how long, I ask myself in the stillness of the night, was this tumor growing in my mother’s brain? What if she’d gotten an MRI the first time she forgot a simple thing like a phone number she used daily? Of course that’s unrealistic, I tell myself. We forget things all the time. I do. But still, who knows? It’s quite confusing. But I’m fine. Too fine, I think. Is there something wrong with me? Why am I not thrashing about in constant angst? Why do I keep forgetting that I need to keep a solemn and somber appearance? I catch myself smiling, even laughing, and quickly wipe the smile off my face as though I’ve committed a grave misconduct. Am I not upset that my mother has left us, and in such a terrible and dreadful way, at such a young age? Does it not bother me that our family has suffered blow after blow and is now trying, with great difficulty, to get up off the dirty floor, wipe ourselves clean and start anew? I tell every-

one, with a slight grin, that I’m still in denial. But I know and understand perfectly well what has happened and how tragic it all is. Still, I do not let myself, most of the time, think too much about it. It gets me nowhere but down. And I don’t want to be down. I want to live. I want to enjoy whatever time I have left. I wonder if that’s wrong. Physically and mentally I am still in mourning. I am not shopping for new clothes for myself. I am not attending any simchas or parties. I am not listening to music; which may even be the hardest of all. But is staying indoors and crying, moping, and feeling sorry for myself also part of the laws of mourning? Am I being selfish for wanting to go on with my life, to finally be able to enjoy a little bit of sunshine after such a long and dreadful winter? I want to walk out and enjoy the warm spring weather. I want to go to parks and have lunches and see the world. I used to do that with my mother, who loved these things as well. She really wasn‘t the type to stay indoors if there was an opportunity to go out. I do miss my mother. We spent a few hours in Prospect Park walking around enjoying the scenery. It wasn’t like she didn’t have things to do, or goals to accomplish. She just knew how to enjoy something as simple as a wonderful spring day. When the official diagnosis came down over a year ago, my siblings and I tried to internalize the horrific new development. I remember making a pleading statement over the six-way telephone conference line:

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“Let’s get through this with laughter. It’s the better of the two. I refuse to be miserable and hysterical if it will not help the situation.” Most of us, if not all, were in proper denial, with me at the top of the list. And as the state of affairs worsened, sometimes slowly and sometimes rapidly, we joked. And we cried. I suppose, now that I think about it, I cried plenty. Have I used up my tears? There are many ways to mourn. One of them is to cry nonstop and create a macabre scene for those nearby. But, my way of thinking has led me to be happy as my mother would have wanted me to be. It isn’t always easy; a sense of fear and sorrow jolts me into reality at irregular intervals. Like a few times every hour. And, as I learned during the shiva, as thousands of people poured through my house, my mother always made everyone laugh. Not that I didn’t know that before. It confirmed what her life was mostly about and what she would have wanted for her children. In the beginning, when she was still aware and cognizant of her condition, she realistically told one of my siblings with her trademark little grin, “You could cry just a little bit.” She didn’t have an easy life, as a lot of us can attest to on our own, since we’re in galus as it is. But she smiled and cracked jokes as though she led the life of Riley. It was her simchas hachaim that brightened her completely wrinkleless face and touched all people with hope and a chance for a better day. If you saw a woman walking on the avenue, barely holding herself together, trying not to look stupid while smiling to herself, it was because she’d met my mother. And my mother cracked a joke just as they parted. This, among a lot of other things, is what I learned from my mother. And this is what I want to keep with me as I traverse the oilam hazeh, motherless. There, my tear ducts aren’t as dried out as I thought. I’m crying again.

u"ga, ct-zun,

SOUND OFF

Please HelP!

am trying very hard to help someone who used to be a member of our West Hempstead community a number of years ago. His name is Yosef Busner. He now lives in Israel and is in desperate need of a kidney transplant operation. The problem is he has to pay out of pocket. The cost of the kidney transplant is $250,000. Any and all donations are welcome as everything adds up, and G-d willing we hope to have a good response from this article. Yosef is currently on dialysis three days a week, but his body is weakening and the dialysis treatments can only go so far. Where do I begin to tell you about the chesed he does for others in Israel? He is constantly bringing food to the poor and underprivileged in remote areas; bringing Purim, Passover and Rosh Hashonah needs for those who can’t make the holidays; helping soldiers in need; going into hard-to-reach areas where Katushya rockets are flying, and risking his own life to help others. He is always there to lend a helping hand, and now it is time to help him. Some of you might remember that I had been involved in helping a young man named Jay Feinberg in his quest for a bone marrow transplant, and we made a

bone marrow drive in YIWH a number of years back. Baruch Hashem he is cancer-free for 25 years after finding a match, and now those efforts are helping others in need also. Let’s help Yosef get well so he can continue to do his wonderful chesed for others on a daily basis. I vowed to help him and I will. There are two ways donations can be made: l. There is a link to a funding page for him online. The link is https://www.gofundme.com/kidneyforyosef 2. The second way is to make donations out to: Friends of B’Ahavat Yisrael and to enclose a sticky note on the check or a regular piece of paper enclosed. Please write on the paper to earmark: YOSEF-KIDNEY (not on the check itself) and send the donations to: Friends of B’Ahavat Yisrael 4809 Avenue N PMB #284 Brooklyn, New York 11234 There is an adage that saving one life is as though you save the entire world. Thanking you in advance, Joyce Simantov Rabbi Kellemer Rabbi Goller’ Shimmie Ehrenreich

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SOUND OFF

THE LIFE OF A DEMOCRACY

THE OBITUARY FOLLOWS:

“UNITED STATES OF AMERICA BORN 1776, DIED 2016.”

rofessor Joseph Olson of Hamline University School of Law in St. Paul, Minnesota, points out some interesting facts concerning the last Presidential election: Number of states won by Obama: 19 Romney: 29 Square miles of land won by Obama: 580,000 Romney: 2,427,000 Population of counties won by Obama: 127 million Romney: 143 million Murder rate per 100,000 residents in counties won by Obama: 13.2 Romney: 2.1 Professor Olson adds: “In aggregate, the map of the territory Romney won was mostly the land owned by the taxpaying citizens of the country. Obama territory mostly encompassed those citizens liv-

ing in low income tenements and living off various forms of government welfare.” Olson believes the United States is now somewhere between the “complacency and apathy” phase of Professor Tyler’s definition of democracy, with some forty percent of the nation’s population already having reached the “governmental dependency” phase. If Congress grants amnesty and citizenship to twenty million criminal invaders called illegals - and they vote then we can say goodbye to the USA in fewer than five years. If you are in favor of this, then by all means, ignore this message. If you are not, then pass this along to help everyone realize just how much is at stake, knowing that apathy is the greatest danger to our freedom.

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O P I N I O N

THE THESAURUS PROBLEM BY RABBI EMANUEL FELDMAN

hesaurus exercise: locate synonyms for the word “thuggish.” What you will find is bully, uncouth, vulgar, coarse, gross. But in every thesaurus one synonym is missing: Trump. It is possible that the owner of all these sobriquets could become the leader of the most powerful country on earth and thus the leader of the free world. That a person who has no experience in elected office, no knowledge of history or foreign affairs, who thinks that everything revolves around making some “deal” or another that he might become president of the USA is more than worrisome; it is frightening. I used to think that Hitlerism and Fascism could never find a home in America because, unlike Germany, America does not have a history of aggression and militarism. But with the dehumanizing elements of society now crawling out from under the rocks and being legitimized, one can no longer be sanguine. Ten million people have voted for him in the primaries. Not all of them are noxious, but millions clearly are. Granted, much of the pro-Trump sentiment is a reaction both to the ultra-left-wing proclivities of the Obama administration, and to the moribund, self-serving politics that today govern America. The people are exasperated; they have had their fill. The Diogeneslike search for an honest man has found no one. And the masses are revolted by the liberal erosion of tradi-

tional family norms. So they have turned to a person who, like every politician, promises to change things in Washington. And because this demagogue says whatever they want him to say at any given moment, they support

him - even though his weekly outbursts would make it difficult to elect him sheriff of a little town. Beyond the dangers that he poses for America as a nation, Trump has unleashed a poison-pill in human relationships. That which was once unacceptable in human discourse, because it was vulgar and uncouth, is now admissible in civil conversation. Thoughts which we used to bury and never express, have now been resurrected and become part of daily discourse. Once upon a time, if a person could not always control the random ruminations that flit across the mind, he could control their verbalization. But with Trump’s vulgarisms, that which among decent people was better left unsaid is now becoming normal. Even if America should somehow survive his politics, the degradation of discourse and the violence to our sense

of decency could be beyond repair. One often wonders: In a nation of 300 million people, are these two candidates the best we can produce for our highest office? Clearly, the system - in which money buys and elects unqualified candidates - is corrupt, dysfunctional, and badly in need of repair. It is said that a nation gets the leaders it deserves. Does America deserve this? Legitimate question: If you are so unhappy with Trump, why not vote for the other candidate? Answer: the other candidate also has a thesaurus problem. Look up “untrustworthy.” What springs up is crafty, calculating, dishonest, unethical. Again, the missing synonym is Hillary. Her list is not as long as Trump’s, but it is just as troubling. The very worst thing about this election is that one of them will win. The American voter is faced with what has been called the evil of two lessers. I still don’t know what I will do on Election Day. My right hand faileth when it considers pulling the lever for Trump; and my right hand cleaves to itself when it considers the lever for Hillary. There is only one comfort: that famous verse in Mishle 21:1: “Lev melech b’yad HaShem, the heart of a king is in the hand of G-d.” Ultimately, kings and kingdoms are not in our hands. We can only do our best to try to affect our future, but the final outcome lies in a realm far beyond us. One remains worried, but King Solomon in Mishle offers a measure of solace.

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O P I N I O N

Gone to the Gorillas By yaakov Menken

n Saturday, a 4-year-old child got away from his parents and crawled over a barrier. Sadly, he tumbled 20 feet and was killed. This was reported on page 20 of the local news and buried on a few local websites, but nowhere else. The parents blamed the people responsible for the barrier and filed suit, while the other party insisted they were not to blame. Those few who read the news reports sighed about the tragic accident, and moved on with their lives. No one called the mother negligent or horrible; no one picketed the other party. We know so little about this story that I’m not even sure it happened. Probably something like this did somewhere in the civilized world, but we don’t know about it because no one paid attention - we all know of similar stories from the past, even the recent past. From which we learn that society now cares more about the life of a gorilla than the life of a young boy. Because something quite similar to the above did happen on Saturday, but the boy wasn’t actually harmed, at least not seriously. He fell, however, into the gorilla enclosure at the Cincinnati Zoo. One of the gorillas, called Harambe, came over to him and initially seemed to care for the child, but then grew agitated and dragged him away from people. After several minutes trying unsuccessfully to calm Harambe, the animal care team realized the child was in imminent danger, and shot the gorilla. “Animal rights activists” held a vigil at the Cincinnati Zoo. Never, in

the 143 years since the Cincinnati Zoo opened, has anyone previously entered an animal enclosure - and most zookeepers are reluctant to shoot the animals under their care. But they are taking the zoo to task, claiming, of course, “excessive force” - that it should have been possible to retrieve the child unharmed from an agitated 450 pound gorilla if they had simply asked nicely enough.

A different school of thought launched a petition at change.org calling for “the parents to be held accountable for the lack of supervision and negligence that caused Harambe to lose his life.” The undersigned even “actively encourage an investigation of the child’s home environment in the interests of protecting the child and his siblings from further incidents!” And this petition crossed the 400,000 signature mark during the time this post was written. Not only are newspapers displaying the names and the pictures of the boy’s parents, Deonne Dickerson and Michelle Gregg, but they are discussing the father’s “criminal history” as if this were somehow relevant. Those of us who have actually been parents should know how ridiculous this all is. Michelle and Deonne

have four children, the littlest of whom was not delighted to learn that mommy thought it was time to leave the zoo. During the moments that it took to attempt to mollify her, the four-year-old dove for the barrier - and, yes, a fouryear-old is going to find his way past reasonable barriers if he puts his young mind to it. Anyone who thinks this requires parental negligence has never parented. Or, it is as my own young son suggested: people are holding vigils and signing this petition because they know the gorilla was more intelligent than they are. Chazal tell us that when Migdal Bavel, the Towel of Babel was under construction, the people cried if a brick fell and broke, but they didn’t cry if a person fell and was killed. It seems beyond illogical. If nothing else, a person is able to make and carry more bricks, so why wasn’t the death of a person at least as important as the brick? But here it is: hundreds of thousands of people, none of whom would have blamed the mother of a child who escaped her attention and fell to his death, are calling for Gregg to be held responsible because her child’s fall led to the death of a gorilla. The entire Western ideal of care for animals, of course, comes from our Torah. But once taken outside of a Torah context, that same principle can be horribly misused. We know that a human life is of infinitely greater value than an animal‘s life - and fortunately the staff of the Cincinnati Zoo does as well. Not so, apparently, hundreds of thousands of people in the United States and elsewhere.

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O P I N I O N

SUMMERTIME BY RABBI BEREL WEIN

o matter what official calendars may say, there is no question that the summer has arrived here in Israel. We have had quite a number of hot spells already and there will undoubtedly be many more over the coming months. Summer generally has become synonymous with leisure, vacations, trips and a more relaxed view of life. Naturally, there are always uncertain events, completely unpredictable and unforeseen, that can interfere with this idyllic view of the season. Yet, we still all hope that this will be a hot summer only in terms of weather and not of politics, government, or strife, G-d forbid. The hallmark of summer is that schools are pretty much shut down and children are freed from their daily scholastic chores. There is a responsa written in the late twelfth century in France by Rabbi Isaac of Dampiere (RI), a great-nephew of Rashi and one of the chief editors of the Tosafot, that discusses the necessity to grant children time off from study. It seems that a certain father had hired a tutor to teach his child Torah studies. The tutor did so on a daily basis but after a period of time he demanded the right to take off for a dayâ&#x20AC;Ś and not to be caged-in teaching the child during that particular time. The father was angered by this behavior of the tutor and attempted to discharge him, even though he admitted that otherwise the tutor was doing a good job. The tutor appealed to Rabbi Isaac for his wages

and his position. The great Rabbi Isaac decided that the tutor was wrongfully injured in this manner and should be restored to his position and livelihood. In addition, Rabbi Isaac commented that it is beneficial for students to have a certain period of time free from studies in order to refresh and be able, therefore, to become better students when their studies resume. I had the opportunity of repeating this to a certain educator here in Israel who complained that teachers have too much time off. I told him that I thought that it all depends on the teacher, the students and the circumstances that accompany that free time. Here in Israel, summertime is travel time both within and without the country. We Israelis are a restless, traveling population. Believe it or not, I have already heard a number of friends of mine complain that they have been everywhere, seen everything, and that there is nowhere new to go. I have held my tongue and not recommended any potential new sites for them to visit. But I am convinced that for many, traveling itself is the experience, not the destination or the museum or the scenery that is advertised in the travel brochure. There was a time when travel was a much more difficult chore than it is today, as the automobile and the airplane have combined to shrink the world. And summer usually provides the best time of the year to satisfy this travel lust. Israelis leave to see the world in the summer and there are a large number of tourists who

arrive to visit Israel and see its splendor during the warm summer months. The feel of the streets of Jerusalem in the summer is different than it is the rest of the year. It is somewhat more carefree, more relaxed and certainly louder than it is during other times of the year. Air-conditioning was a late arrival in the Israeli lifestyle, but now that it has arrived it is exploited with a vengeance. One wonders how even a few decades ago people functioned and were satisfied with their lives during the hot summer before air-conditioning became available. Electricity is relatively expensive in our country and therefore people are rather frugal in deciding whether or not to turn on the air conditioning in their homes and apartments. However, by now, all public buildings and most commercial establishments have air-conditioning and use it to a considerable and constant extent during the summer months. Jerusalem usually has cool nights even in the summer, so the use of air-conditioning in order to sleep comfortably is not an absolute necessity. The Talmud records for us that there was an evening breeze that daily swept up any debris that may have collected during the day on the Temple Mount. There are echoes of that breeze that still occur during the summer months here in present-day Jerusalem. It comes to remind us of our heritage and of the fact that we have been here a long time and that, in many ways, things really have not changed over the millennia of our history.

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O P I N I O N

THE SHORT VORT

WHERE IS HASHEM? BY RABBI RON YITZCHOK EISENMAN

was walking to shul this morning and suddenly I heard a voice calling frantically, “Rabbi Eisenman, Rabbi Eisenman, please wait, I must speak to

you.” I was sure the person must have a life and death situation and that must be the reason for his frantic attempt to get my attention. I stopped walking and waited for the fellow to catch up with me. As he breathlessly caught up to me he announced while still panting, “Rabbi, I must tell you what happened to me last night. You won’t believe it! You are certainly going to write about it in your next Short Vort. You just can’t believe what happened to me! This is certainly an amazing story of Hashgacha Protis!” I waited until he caught his breath and then allowed him to continue. Here is what he related to me as best as I can recall it: “I had a chasunah last night in Brooklyn and when I got there, I realized there was no valet parking. Where would I possibly find a parking spot? I knew the chosson really wanted me to be at the chupah and here I was in the middle of Brooklyn without a place to park my car. I decided to say a perek of Tehillim and go once around the block. Well, you won’t believe what happened; as I finished the last word of the perek I suddenly saw a

man pulling out of a perfectly legal and wide spot! I quickly put on my directional, and I pulled right in. I have to add that it was not a moment too soon as I noticed that behind me were two other cars filled with other frum people from Passaic. If I would not have said the perek in Tehillim which caused me to drive slower, I never would have arrived at the exact moment I did and some other person would have gotten the spot! Isn’t that an amazing story of Hashgacha Protis? I bet you’ll want to use it for today’s Short Vort. Please, of course leave out my name because I know others might be jealous of me because Hashem is always watching over me!” After keeping me captive for six minutes as he related the story with all of its self-congratulatory details, he finally released me to go on my way. The man was right in one respect: I will write about his story. However, not in the way he expects. Was he correct in assuming that

this anecdote really represents Hashgacha Protis for him? Am I to assume from the story that all the other frum people who were ‘denied’ the spot are not on the level of receiving Hashgacha Protis? Do we only recognize Hashem’s dominion over the world when He does what we want Him to do and He finds us a parking spot? Are all of the times when we don’t find the ‘perfect spot’ indicative of Hashem’s lack of running the world? And what about celebrating your own success if by doing so you are comparing and contrasting yourself to other fine and good Jews who were not privileged to see Hashem’s hand as clearly as you were? Is that what Hashem wants us to do? Of course we should always look for ways to thank Hashem for watching over us and for taking care of our needs; however, I am not sure that finding a parking spot merits a special Short Vort on the elusive and somewhat cryptic concept of Hashgacha Protis. Think about Hashem and be thankful for all that He does for you. At the same time, perhaps we all should be a little bit more discreet and use greater discretion when we declare with certainty that Hashem is specifically and uniquely showering me with a double dosage of Hashgacha Protis.

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Ron Yitzchok Eisenman, Rabbi, Congregation Ahavas Israel, Passaic,

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Inspiration Time For Hugs

fter all of these years I can still remember the first time I placed my newborn baby son into my grandmother’s arms. Nana by that time was 77 years old and needed a walker to get around her tiny home. Yet, the second I came in the door she stretched her arms out to me for a hug and kissed me. When she had settled into her favorite chair I placed my son into her arms and watched her rock him gently while her eyes sparkled with joy and her face filled with smiles. By that time Nana had already been through so much in her life. As a little girl she had survived a German U-boat attack on the transport ship tak-

ing her to America from Italy during World War I. She’d learned English as a second language and worked hard, even as a child, to help her poor family survive in their new home. She’d married and raised four sons, growing four huge vegetable gardens to help feed them. Then she’d helped to raise me and my two brothers when my Dad and Mom moved back into her home after Grandpa died. When I was 11 years old she’d watched in tears as a fire destroyed that home in the middle of the night. She’d also survived brain surgery to remove a cancerous tumor from her head. As I watched her hold my baby son in her arms I wondered how much

longer she would be with us and hoped it would be for a long time. Thankfully, Nana lived to be 92. I guess G-d knew she still had more babies to hold, more kisses and hugs to give, and more love to share. Now my newborn baby is 28 years old and I have gray hair and wrinkles. Still, I don’t feel old. Like Nana, I know that I have more kisses, hugs, and love inside of me to share. Life may have pain, struggles and sorrows, but G-d loves us and helps us through them all. Life here may be brief, but there is always time for love. There is always time for learning. There is always time for joy. And there is always time for hugs.

A Simple Lesson

any years ago, Emotions and Character Traits gathered to spend their vacation on a coastal island. Each of them was having a good time, but one day a storm warning was announced and everyone had to leave the island. This caused a panic, as all the Emotions and Feelings rushed to their boats. Only Love did not wish to be in a hurry. There was so much to do that Love was the last one who realized it was time to leave. By then, there were no free boats left and Love looked around for someone who would offer him a seat. Vanity passed by in a classy boat, all decked out with gold and dia-

monds. Love asked: “Please, take me in your boat.” But Vanity replied: “My boat is full of my own wants and desires. There is no place for you.” Then Greed came by in a lovely boat. Love asked: “Greed, could you take me in your boat? Please, help me.” Greed said: “I have nothing to share with you. My beautiful boat is all for me.” A bit later Sorrow was passing by and Love called for help. But Sorrow answered: “I am too immersed in sadness; I do not want your company. I want to be by myself.” Then Happiness came by, and Love asked for help. But Happiness was too wrapped up in his joy of the moment to even notice Love’s predicament.

Suddenly, somebody called out: “Love, I will take you with me.” Love did not recognize its savior, but it gratefully jumped onto the boat. When everyone had reached a safe place, Love got off the boat and met Knowledge. Love asked: “Knowledge, do you know who helped me when everyone else turned away?” Knowledge smiled: “That was Kindness. Because only through caring and giving to another, can one really appreciate Love. The message of this story is that when we are Vain and Greedy, we cannot find Love. It isn’t Happiness or Sorrow that engender Love, either. Love can only come from concern and compassion for another.”

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T O R A H Pynchas Brener is the Ashkenazi Chief Rabbi of Caracas, Venezuela, since 1967. He received his Bachelor of Arts and Rabbinic Ordination from Yeshiva University and his Master’s degree from Columbia University, and is a PhD honoris causa of Bar Ilan University. He has an internet project and a website: www.pynchasbrener.com.

NEVER AGAIN WITH TEETH

he late great Jewish historian Salo Baron complained against “The lachrymose history of the Jewish People,” because of the emphasis that is placed upon Jewish persecution and suffering during the two millennia of exile. What about the many accomplishments? And there are many, starting with the monumental Babylonian Talmud, the encyclopedic compendium that investigates, explains, gives direction and represents the geist of the Jewish people. As some point out: the Torah is G-d’s gift to the Jewish people, the Talmud is the response to G-d’s gift. We can add to the above contributions, the many commentaries and super commentaries composed about this formidable Talmud. The “Sheilot uTeshuvot,” the epistles and innumerable novellas in response to new situations and unforeseen events. And what about the poetry and philosophy, history and science that Jewish minds produced during this long period of exile from Eretz Yisrael? Many lands benefited socially, economically and politically from Jewish genius and learning. And when Jews were expelled from these territories, their respective societies suffered because of their absence. Yet, one cannot minimize the impact of persecutions and pogroms. The same Salo Baron, while complaining about the over-emphasis on persecution, estimated that Jews would have numbered well over 200,000,000 in the twen-

tieth century were it not for the catastrophes and murders that curtailed their number. There are striking events such as the Crusades that sowed violations and murder. The Inquisition and expulsion from Spain, the Chmelnitski hordes of destruction and assassination, and, of course, the horrendous Holocaust of only decades ago only deepened the sadness and suffering of the Jewish People. These episodes are prominent and, at the same time, cast a shadow over innumerable smaller events recorded in different communities, and by now mostly forgotten. Rambam’s Igeret Teiman, the letter he addressed to the Jews of Yemen that deals with the then contemporary issue of forced conversions to Islam, is only symptomatic of local episodes that brought about uncertainty and terror that often concluded in murder or expulsion. Where was our G-d when all this was happening? Great minds, including those of the Talmud, have wrestled with this issue. Is not the book of Job the paradigm of this kind of dilemma that resists satisfactory resolution? “Eizehu ben Olam Haba? Who will be included in the World to Come?” posits the Talmud. According to Rabi Yochanan: “HaSomech Geulah liTefilah,” he who puts close together the notion of salvation with that of prayer. This is why in many a synagogue, the Baal Tefilah, prior to the Amida, says in a low voice the ending of the berachah Gaal Israel. It is done in this manner in order not

to invite the Amen response and thereby evoke a separation between the two. Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik explained that by not interrupting between Geulah and Tefilah we indicate that our prayers in the Amida are directed to Him Who, in the past, responded to our cries, to the laments of our ancestors in Egypt. That is, we are not praying to the Creator, the G-d of Bereshit, to “Him Who Spoke” and the universe was created. We are praying to the G-d that intervenes in History: proof thereof, when our forefathers were enslaved He responded and sent 10 plagues to force the Egyptians to free us. Of course, we know that it is the same G-d who created, and the G-d who took us out of Egypt. There is only one G-d. It is only a matter of emphasizing certain attributes of G-d necessary for better human understanding. Our lament only becomes sharper then. G-d already showed in the past that He is interested in our welfare and willing to act when necessary. As cruel as was avdut in Mitsrayim, as oppressing as the yoke in ancient Egypt may have been, the Nazi Holocaust is of a different and most disturbing order. So why did G-d absent himself from history at such a crucial time? Obviously, I have no satisfactory answer. Nevertheless, let me make some brief history. G-d sent 10 plagues to Egypt to force the Egyptians, or better yet, to force the Pharaoh to “let My people go.” Our ancestors did not conceive by themselves an alternative. They knew there was no escape from slavery, save for Divine intervention. Our ancestors had not coalesced yet into a people. Pharaoh may have called them an “am,” a people, but they were composed basically of family groups, tribes that tried to survive. It would be centuries later, under the leadership of Shmuel haNavi that they evolved and consolidated into a nation. After leaving Egypt our ancestors were confronted by an inhospitable sea in front of them and by Egyptian carriages in hot pursuit behind. This time, G-d performed a miracle for them by parting the waters of the Red Sea. The Egyptians drowned only as a consequence of their pursuit. The waters were parted to enable the escape of the Jewish People. G-d told us: “Don’t worry, I will take care of you. HaShem yilachem lachem veatem tacharishun. Keep quiet, I am here for

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you. I will wage war for you.” However, during the confrontation with Amalek, the situation changed. G-d would continue to fight, but this time together with the people. Our ancestors had to battle and Moshe had to pray, simultaneously. And finally, when Yehoshua led the conquest of the Land of Israel, they had to take matters into their own hands. G-d had been present at all times, but was behind the scenes. We had become the main protagonists. What brought about this change? Har Sinai, which we commemorated again recently on Shavuot. The giving of the Torah was momentous in many respects. G-d revealed to us, and through us to mankind, the secret of success and growth. The Mitsvot would insure personal development and spiritual strength and set the foundation for a society ruled by justice and mercy. G-d could now “lead from behind,” because he had shown the way to victory over jealousy and strife. The way of the Torah would defeat confrontation and lead to understanding and harmony among people. This may be the meaning of the Midrash that has the angels questioning Divine wisdom in revealing the Torah to humankind, because it contains the definitive recipe for understanding, wellbeing and peace for all. Centuries later, during the times of Mordechai and Esther, our ancestors renewed the Brit, the covenant with G-d, after having a taste of assimilation that did not lead to equality. Considered by Haman and Achashverosh as strangers and “others,” they wanted to annihilate them and steal their possessions. Our ancestors came to the conclusion that only by staying united, by living to the tune of the Mitsvot did the Jewish people gain the necessary strength, determination and ability to overcome its enemies. We jump forward to the Inquisition and the Holocaust, and the innumerable tragedies to which we were subjected. What is the lesson we derive? The world came to the conclusion that we were basically helpless, weak and defenseless. “Am levadad yishkon, a people that dwells alone,” as Bilam had prophesized. In this sense then, the establishment of the State of Israel is the response of the Jewish people to their previous helplessness. “Never again” now has teeth,

because there is a strong Tzahal behind this affirmation. Threats made against the physical integrity of Jews anywhere in the world, can receive immediate military response as the Entebbe episode of 1976 demonstrated. G-d may have seemed to be absent during our latest tragedies. But He still leads the destiny of mankind, only that He does not find it necessary to intervene overtly. Because as long as we follow what was taught at Har Sinai we have the means to bring about change and become a beacon unto the nations. Maybe

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that is the meaning of “Lo bashamayim hi,” the Torah is no longer exclusively in G-d’s domain. He revealed its content to us and gave clear instructions as to how to go about creating a more just society where eventually the visions of the Prophets will become reality: the lion and the sheep will dwell together in harmony. The Talmud teaches that prophesy is no longer the order of the day. With Malachi we concluded that period. Why is that so? Are we less deserving Continued on Page 111

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A Sample of Wisdom from the Orchos Chaim l’HaRosh by Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss

ecently, I started a new series of lectures on the ancient sefer, Orchos Chaim l’HaRosh, which details in 154 concise segments the Rosh’s, zt”l, zy”a, advice on how to live one’s life. (One hundred fifty-four is the same gematria as Olam Haba - the Afterlife!) My dear readers can view these shiurim free of charge by going to TorahAnytime.com and going to the section ‘mussar/self-improvement.’ There are already thirty shiurim archived there, each about fifteen minutes in length perfect to watch during a coffee break or while eating lunch. You can also hear these lectures on the KolHaLoshon Network by dialing 718906-6400, selecting ‘1’ for English, ‘4’ for mussar, then ‘4’ for Orchos Chaim l’HaRosh. In this incredible sefer, the Rosh teaches us all kinds of disciplines such as: to minimize a person’s accomplishments in his or her own eyes so as not to become full of oneself and also to avoid resting upon their laurels. He advises us to think often of the day of death, thereby ensuring that we always have our priorities straight and that we avoid procrastination. He recommends always considering the consequences of our actions carefully before embarking on any ventures. He cautions us to utilize the counsel of others and not to rely solely on our own opinions, which are adulterated by self-interest and the whisperings of our Evil Inclination. Much, much more profound advice awaits the student of this marvelous study. I’d like to zoom-in on two highlights of advice that the Rosh suggests, which I found to be ‘game-

changers’ in my own life. The Rosh teaches in Number 38 that one should close one’s eyes when saying a bracha. This recipe of shutting one’s eyes to activate concentration is suggested by the commentators when davening the Shemone Esrei and, of course, we know that we close our eyes when accepting the yoke of Heaven in the all-important proclamation of Shema Yisroel. The Rosh takes this a step further and suggests that all our blessings should be intoned with our eyes shut. As I started to practice this, I found that there is a clever advantage concealed in this recommendation. Many people, when saying for example an Asher Yotzar when coming out from the restroom, say it while they are booting-up their computers or making a cup of coffee. Thus, they are distracted from concentrating on the blessing. Furthermore, it is disrespectful to clean your desk or put the clothes away while talking to Hashem. But when your eyes are shut, you can’t very well do anything else. So, besides helping you to hone-in better on the meaning of “Shehakol nihiyeh bidvaro - That everything comes about because of His words,” closing the eyes also forces us to stop what we are doing when talking to Hashem. It’s interesting that the Manchester Rosh Yeshiva, Rav Segal, zt”l, zy”a, also grappled with the challenge of proper concentration when making our blessings. He used to have index cards which he carried with all of the different blessings printed upon them and he would read from the card when making a particular blessing. This method has an added benefit for it includes one’s eyes in the mitzvah of making

the blessings. But, if you don’t have a set of bracha cards available, the Rosh’s method will add much more meaning to your bracha experience. This is not a small thing. In a very real way the expression, “Give a blessing, get a blessing,” applies to our brachos. For the posuk says, “Bechol makom asher askir es Shmi Avo eilecha uberachticha - Any place that you mention My Name, I will come to you and bless you.” So, we can greatly enhance the amount of Divine blessing that we have in our lives by increasing the quality of the way we bless Hashem. In another passage of deep wisdom, the Rosh teaches us to consider the consequences of any course of action before embarking upon it and he eloquently adds the verse, “V’hachochom einov b’rosho - And the wise man has his eyes in his head.” At first glance, this seems to be an absurdity. Everyone has their eyes in their head; it’s not solely the anatomy of one who is wise. But, here is what the Rosh means. Most people react immediately to what they see. The wise person responds to what he thinks about what he saw. So it is only the man of wisdom whose eyes are in their head. The Rosh advises us to take this precaution, not be hasty with our reactions. When Yaakov was on his deathbed, he told Reuven, “You were the first of my strength and as such you were slated to have both the monarchy and the priesthood. However, “Pachas k’mayim, al toser - You were hasty like water, and therefore you will not excel.” Just like if a dam ruptures, the water does not ponder whether it should rush out and cause a flood. Rather it bursts out without any

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concern. So too, since Reuven acted impetuously, he lost all privileges of leadership. The Rosh is guiding us to always consider the consequences of our actions before making a move. This is the trait of the wise. As it says, “Eiza hu chacham? Haroeh es hanolad - Who is the wise man? He who can see the results of his actions.” The fool behaves according to his instincts and chooses the path of immediate gratification. The Rosh cautions us not to be rash but rather to look before we leap. So, for example, when couples argue, one of the spouses can say something that will ‘win’ the fight but then he will be stuck with the ‘loser’ the entire evening. Not a pleasant prospect. With a modicum of foresight, one can react in a more conciliatory manner and save a nighttime of unhappiness. Similarly, a parent might scream at a child in frustration and, while the ability to vent affords temporary relief, the loss of the child’s respect or the damage to the tranquility of the home can have long lasting detrimental effects. As well, a nasty retort to a friend can give one a

fleeting sense of relief but the damage of such a comment will linger in his colleague’s memory bank for decades. So too, in the financial arena, hasty risks can embroil one in years of regret. In public school, they do a drill with kindergarten children. They give them a choice of three M&Ms now or a handful a week from now. Most children opt for the immediately available three. They are not able to look ahead. Successful life in Yiddishkeit is all about considering the consequences. Lashon hara leads to

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Gehenom. Giving away our hard earned money, to a charitable cause, leads to Gan Eden. Choosing a spouse solely because she has a beautiful face, or because he has a bulging financial portfolio, is a possible recipe for marital disaster. Thus, we should try to train ourselves to think before we speak and to consider the consequences before we react. If we are retorting and responding in anger or in a bad mood, it is oh so true that “Haste makes waste.” Continued on Page 111

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R E A L

L I F E

A HolocAust love story RABBI YOSEF WALLIS, DIRECTOR OF ARACHIM OF ISRAEL, TALKS TO PROJECT WITNESS ABOUT HIS FATHER, JUDAH WALLIS, WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN PAVENITZ, POLAND:

hile he was in Dachau, a Jew who was being taken to his death suddenly flung a small bag at my father, Judah Wallis. He caught it, thinking it might contain a piece of bread. Upon opening it, however, he was disturbed to discover a pair of tefillin. Judah was very frightened because he knew that were he to be caught carrying tefillin, he would be put to death instantly. So he hid the tefillin under his shirt and headed for his bunkhouse. In the morning, just before the appel (roll call), while still in his bunkhouse, he put on the tefillin. Unexpectedly, a German officer appeared. He ordered him to remove the tefillin and noted the number on Judah’s arm. At the appel, in front of thousands of silent Jews, the officer called out Judah’s number and he had no choice but to step forward. The German officer waved the tefillin in the air and said, “Dog! I sentence you to death by public hanging for wearing these.” Judah was placed on a stool and a noose was placed around his neck. Before he was hanged, the officer said in a mocking tone, “Dog, what is your last wish?” “To wear my tefillin one last time,” Judah replied. The officer was dumbfounded. He

handed Judah the tefillin. As Judah put them on, he recited the verse that is said while the tefillin are being wound around the fingers: “Ve’eirastich li le’olam, ve’eirastich li b’tzedek uvemishpat, ub’chessed, uv’rachamim, ve’eirastich li b’emunah, v’yodaat es Hashem.” I will betroth you to me forever and I will betroth you to me with righteousness and with justice and with kindness and with mercy and I will betroth you to me with fidelity, and you shall know G-d.” It is hard for us to picture this Jew with a noose around his neck, wearing tefillin on his head and arm - but that was the scene that the entire camp was forced to watch, as they awaited the impending hanging of the Jew who had dared to break the rule against wearing tefillin. Even women from the adjoining camp were lined up at the barbed wire fence that separated them from the men’s camp, forced to watch this horrible sight. As Judah turned to watch the silent crowd, he saw tears in many people’s eyes. Even at that moment, as he was about to be hanged, he was shocked. Jews were crying! How was it possible that they still had tears left to shed? And for a stranger? Where were those tears coming from? Impulsively, in Yiddish, he called out, “Yidden, I am the victor. Don’t

you understand, I am the winner!” The German officer understood the Yiddish and was infuriated. He said to Judah, “You dog, you think you are the winner? Hanging is too good for you. You are going to get another kind of death.” Judah, my father, was taken from the stool and the noose was removed from his neck. He was forced into a squatting position and two huge rocks were placed under his arms. Then he was told that he would be receiving 25 lashes to his head - the head on which he had dared to position his tefillin. The officer told him that if he dropped even one of the rocks, he would be shot immediately. In fact, because this was such an extremely painful form of death, the officer advised him, “Drop the rocks now. You will never survive the 25 lashes to the head. Nobody ever does.” Judah’s response was, “No, I won’t give you the pleasure.” At the 25th lash, Judah lost consciousness and was left for dead. He was about to be dragged to a pile of corpses, after which he would have been burned in a ditch, when another Jew saw him, shoved him to the side, and covered his head with a rag so people didn’t realize he was alive. Eventually, after he recovered consciousness fully, he crawled to the nearest bunkhouse that was on raised piles and hid under it until he was strong enough to come out under his own power. Two months later he was liberated. During the hanging and beating episode, a 17-year-old girl had been watching the events from the women’s side of the fence. After liberation, she made her way to Judah. She walked over to him and said, “I’ve lost everyone. I don’t want to be alone anymore. I saw what you did that day when the officer wanted to hang you. Will you marry me?” My parents walked over to the Klausenberger Rebbe and requested that he perform the marriage ceremony. The Klausenberger Rebbe, whose Kiddush Hashem is legendary, wrote out a kesubah (marriage contract) by hand from memory and married the couple. I have that handwritten kesubah in my possession to this day.

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R E A L

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L I F E

WHEN A RABBI WORE JEANS AND A WIG TO SAVE A JEW BY HILLEL FENDEL

abbi Yitzchak David Grossman, legendary head of the Migdal Ohr Institutions in Migdal HaEmek in the Jezreel Valley - known as the “Disco Rabbi” because of his practice of entering noisy nightclubs to find potential returnees to Torah - related the following extraordinary incident in his most recent column in the weekly BaKehillah. In the days preceding Yom Kippur one year, a man came to Rabbi Grossman and tearfully told him that his grandson had been caught in the clutches of missionaries. “My son and his family live in Europe,” the man said, “and they sent their son to study in Israel. He ended up renting an apartment with a missionary, who convinced him to move to a monastery in Dir Hana to learn Christianity. How can I pray on Yom Kippur when my own grandson is sitting in a monastery?!” Dir Hana, located not far from Migdal HaEmek, is a predominantly Muslim village, with a Christian monastery perched on a hilltop at the edge of town. Rabbi Grossman contacted the village mukhtar and asked for his help in entering the monastery. The mukhtar said that his son is in charge of bringing food up to the site, and that he could give him a lift up the hill. But in order not to attract attention, the distinguished Hassidic-look-

ing rabbi, originally from Meah She’arim, put on a wig and jeans and made his way up to the monastery on a tractor loaded with bread, vegetables and other victuals. The disguise worked; the Christians thought he was a new recruit and allowed him to enter. Rabbi Grossman

quickly located the young man in question, and asked to talk with him privately. They entered a side room, Rabbi Grossman took off his wig, and the astonished boy exclaimed, “Rav Grossman?! What are you doing here?!” “What are you doing here?” the rabbi countered. “Your grandfather

survived the Nazi camps - does he deserve this? He came to me crying and cannot be comforted!” The boy began to cry and complain about things his family had done to him, but Rabbi Grossman was insistent: “I hear you, but you have gone too far. Yom Kippur is two days from now. How can you remain here on that holy day?” The boy said, “No matter what, I eat on Yom Kippur.” Rav Grossman said, “I have a full refrigerator at home - just come! Be with us in Migdal HaEmek on Yom Kippur.” The boy refused to commit himself, yet they still parted warmly, and Rav Grossman got back on the tractor to return home. Yom Kippur came with no sign of the boy. “I was very tense,” the rabbi related, “and with a very heavy heart, I began reciting Kol Nidre… “But the next night, after the fast, I received a very emotional call from the grandfather, who told me that his grandson had spent Yom Kippur in the synagogue with him, full of remorse at what he had done and resolved to start on a new path.” Many years later, Rabbi Grossman continued, “I was in a shtiebel in Monsey, New York, when a local man came up to me, dressed as a typical Orthodox Jew. He bent down to me with a smile and whispered, ‘Rabbi Grossman, where’s your wig?’”

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HEALTH & ADVICE

Dear Bubby If you would like advice from Bubby send your letters to: Bubby, c/o Country Yossi Family Magazine, 1310 48th Street, Suite 308, Brooklyn, New York 11219 or Fax to (718) 851-2510

LOST THE WEGHT, STILL DON’T FEEL GREAT! Dear Bubby, I am 20 years old and for as long as I can remember I have been struggling with a weight problem, the problem being that I’m fat! Here’s the background. Both my parents are overweight, as well as many of my aunts and uncles. My two brothers are thin, and always have been. So the genetic tendency to gain weight seems to have fallen on me. I will not blame my heaviness solely on bad genes; truth is, my family has poor eating habits. My mom has never made any effort to cook healthy; her motto is “good food, happy people.” Over the years, as many of my friends began to eat whole wheat and drink water, my mom continued to fry up almost everything and buy soda and the like. For most of my life I was the chubby girl, then the overweight teen, and finally the fat girl with a pretty face. At 19, when I returned from seminary and knew I’d begin dating, I decided enough was enough and for the past year have worked so hard to shed the weight. I am proud to report that as of today I have lost over 40 lbs. I joined a gym and made most of my own meals following a Weight Watchers plan. So you’re probably wondering, with all the good news, what the problem is. It’s twofold. First, I am still living at home, and am therefore subjected to my mother’s meals and her kitchen. She makes no effort to prepare meals that would enable me to keep off the weight; rather, she continues to cook fattening and unhealthy foods that she and my father enjoy. In response to my weight loss, she says I look great and that I am old enough to prepare my own meals. She is right about that, but Bubby - try coming home to a kitchen full of doughnuts, pizza, fries… and resolving to eat your salad. The second part of my dilemma seems hopeless, but I’ll share it with you all the same. Since I’ve started dating I have been turned down several times and I have heard

through the grapevine that many potential guys are afraid to date someone with such an overweight mother. Although I am now down to a size 6, they claim that by looking at my mother it is obvious what I will look like given time and children. I feel this is so unfair, as I am someone who cares greatly about my image and will work very hard to maintain a nice figure. Furthermore, I have tried to convince my mother to lose weight for my benefit, to which she responds, “When there’s a wedding to make, I’ll have an incentive!” Bubby - am I wrong to expect my mother to change her lifestyle and her figure for me? After all, if she’s happy and my father’s happy, who am I to butt in? Then again, it’s affecting me in more ways than one! Any helpful words of advice? Yours Truly, S.E. (Flatbush) Dearest S.E., Congratulations on an amazing accomplishment! So many people go through their whole lives without ever having the willpower to shed the pounds. Not only are you now in position to feel better about your physical appearance, but you are also much healthier. Your testimony is proof that even in the most challenging of circumstances, when there’s a will there’s a way. Despite the temptations provided by your mother’s kitchen, you were able to persevere. It is going to take the same continuous efforts to maintain the weight loss. So long as you are living under your parents’ roof, you are continuously exposed to their various habits. However much you’d like them to change their eating habits, there is simply no way to ensure their cooperation. So instead of all your futile efforts, which will no doubt be met with your mother’s wise cracks and sarcasm, why not take matters into your own

hands. Fill the kitchen with healthy snacks and products that you can enjoy. Today, the options for healthy eating are so expansive. There is really very little reason for self deprivation. Even diets like Weight Watchers allow for low fat desserts and occasional treats like pizza, for example. Now that you have shed the weight, the key is moderation and exercise. Reserve a shelf in the kitchen and a space in the fridge just for you. Sometimes the most powerful way to encourage change in somebody else is through example. So save your breath and continue doing what you’re doing. Through your initiative, your parents may just begin to imitate. As far as part two of your concern, it is very unfortunate that we live in a world in which we are judged not solely on our own merits, but rather on those around us as well. Today, so many singles get caught up on various aspects of parent and sibling details that they are no longer focusing on the individuals with whom they would actually share their lives. Guys who are turning down a date with you based on your mother’s weight are missing out on a potentially wonderful outcome. It is they who are missing out, and not you. When it comes to the world of shidduch dating, it is important to take on the perspective of basherte. Anyone who doesn’t come into your life for whatever reason was not meant for you. The guy that you will ultimately end up with will marry you and love you and not be sidetracked by the insignificant minutia. Is it wrong to assume that someone with overweight parents has a tendency to be overweight themselves? No! This is a definite possibility. What’s wrong is ruling out an individual based solely on this chance, especially when so often it works quite to the contrary! There is no guarantee when it comes to the future, and so to all singles out there I beseech you to judge someone based on who they are today and not who they were or who they might become. In closing, I’d like to address the parents out there who are reading this. It is of the utmost importance that as parents we encourage and support our children in all of their positive efforts at change. It does not diminish your role as parent to learn from your child and make changes to accommodate his/her growth. It speaks volumes about your love and dedication, that you are willing to alter your lifestyle in the name of love. Behatzlacha! Love, Bubby

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HEALTH & ADVICE not a personal affront? She speaks about appreciation and it becomes clear that what she yearns for is for him to value what she values and put action behind it. To want what she wants for the kids and their relationship and to help create the picture of the family life she envisioned creating. In her mind’s eye she always saw in clear detail what her home would be like. She knew exactly how to execute it too. She wondered if he was the wrong partner for her, he seems like the weak link. Without his efforts she finds it hard to respect him. Her judgments about his fathering and anxiety leave her filled with contempt, though she doesn’t use that word. It’s palpable in the room, though. He wonders why her overflowing love for the children doesn’t extend to him. He too wants to feel appreciated. She knows everything, has all the answers, except the ones that he believes would solve their problems and he’d like her to make some room for his ideas, for him. He wants to be accepted and loved just as he is. Imperfect, but no more imperfect than she, or anyone else in his estimation! She does know most everything. It’s part of who she is, helping people find pragmatic ways to deal with and solve problems. With a few insightful questions and some wittiness, she usually gets right to the crux of an issue and from there a quick but thorough analysis usually leads to the right answer. People love that about her. She makes everyone happy, except her husband. She is in pain, it’s his fault; she is sad, then angry and defensive. They want peace and love but they aren’t sure anymore that they want it with each other. More likely they’ve lost faith in their ability to be happy together, to

MISUNDERSTOOD

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feel so misunderstood,” she said. “Not just in this instance, but often.” She sighed and took a moment to hold back the tears. It’s very painful to feel unknown. She said she knew with certainty so many things about who she was and her husband just didn’t see it, couldn’t appreciate what she thought of as her greatest assets. He was anxious and nervous so often and so caught up in his own stuff, his needs so prominent that hers always had to fade into the background. Often she didn’t mind, part of what made her so wonderful was her ability to cope, to manage so many things well and juggle responsibilities while still maintaining her good nature, her effervescence bubbling over so that her children would see so much joy in life and at home. Only, she wanted him to see that she did all this and appreciate it; appreciate her and the home she was creating. He is anxious about work, a lot is going on that he knows he can’t control and so much is riding on his income. Hers is helpful but his pays the lion’s share, including the mortgage and most of the bills. He appreciates her work immensely; he says he knows they wouldn’t make it without her help. He thinks she’s the greatest mother ever and he can’t understand why she would think otherwise. Why can’t she understand that his stress is

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bring joy to the other. That is, after all, a deep and common human fear that stirs up our insecurities, bringing the defenses roaring to life and quickly building up walls of defense. Our ability to reach out with love is shuttered tightly behind them. “See me and love me!” It is the battle cry of relationships, and one of the most difficult things to do. To see without judgment, to know not what we know, but adopt the perspective of another and hold it in esteem. To implement a stance of conscious compassion and honor someone else’s needs even if we don’t understand them yet. Love is an action. When the feeling is lacking you must put it to work, before giving up. You can choose to give more or give smarter. Too often we follow the golden rule and treat our spouse as we hope to be treated. In marriage the rule changes: Do unto your spouse as he would have done unto himself. Don’t give what you want, give what s/he wants. If she wants you to engage more with the children, put aside some time for it in the evening or make Tuesday night story night, or the last Sunday of every month ice cream day. The point is: Do something, do it wholeheartedly, and do it for her. If he craves time with you, make it a priority and let the kids know it. If he is anxious, offer him a cup of tea and some time to unwind, let him know that his feelings, roiling with testosterone as they may be, are not a threat to you. It’ll be easier for him to express himself or work through it. The strongest teams focus on strengths and find ways to utilize each individual’s unique set of skills; the weakest break each other down. To be a team builder you must see the skills, you must look at your spouse often, pay attention, notice and comment on what they bring to the table that enhances your life, and build on that. Don’t try to change each other, embrace each other. Sheri Toiv, LMHC is a licensed mental health counselor whose practice serves adolescents, adults and couples. For more information visit on the web at sheritoivlmhc.com or call 917-332-7508 for an appointment.

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HEALTH & ADVICE

Man-Up! It’s tIMe for the Less-faIrer Gender to take ControL of the ‘shIddUCh CrIsIs’ By I.M. (ItChe MeIr) GereCht JewIshworLdrevIew.CoM

ust in case we’ve forgotten, frum media won’t let us: There’s a “Shidduch Crisis” raging, one in which there’s a shortage of men for women to date who meet their criteria. One good thing about shortages of all types is that it forces you to prioritize; to focus on what’s really important and thereby - in theory - to understand yourself better. For instance, if you only have enough money for either a new home entertainment system or a trip to an exotic location, you must decide which one is more important to you, and in doing so, obtain a deeper understanding of yourself. People who can just purchase anything they want lose out on this important introspection. Baruch HaShem, our current crisis has been with us long enough for women to have finally whittled down their list to a laser focus on the most essential qualities to find in a potential mate. In fact, the list has shrunk so much that now there are only five attributes. And they are: rich, learned, muscular, young and tall. It is insulting to tell women at this

point to stop looking for that which they want and to settle for something even less. Therefore, it is up to the men to become that which women are looking for, and this is possible as follows: 1. Rich: Become a workaholic! Spend twenty years focused on nothing but financial success, and with Hashem’s help you will become rich. 2. Learned: Become a “masmid!” Get up an hour early every day and go to a daf yomi shiur. In the evening after work, review the daf with a chavrusa. Also learn the commentaries and the halachic ramifications from the poskim. Review this on Shabbos with a chavrusa instead of taking a nap. After seven years or so, you will be learned. 3. Muscular: Become a gym rat! Go to the gym every day and hire a personal trainer. Learn the science of muscle building and hang out with other (experienced) gym rats to learn various techniques. Learn to enjoy protein shakes. 4. Young: Obviously, you can’t change your age. But you can still

develop a youthful disposition! Hang out with young people and take on their interests. Listen to young people music. Learn to dress, speak and “text” like a young person. Learn to use the technologies that young people prefer. Keep a pulse on the trends. And live a stress-free lifestyle! People who live with stress tend to age faster. This last item is most important. A woman will not be happy if you are too busy and stressed out to pay attention to her and your children. 5. Tall: Of course, you can’t change your height. But you can still do things that will make you look taller. Wear elevator shoes, a hat, and stand straight all the time. Walk with a swagger. Do this and you will at least appear taller. This is an exciting time for men who are rich, learned, muscular, young and tall and wish to get married, as they can have their pick of excellent women in their peer group. Select one of these women and she is sure to agree to spend the rest of her life with you. If not, there is still more you can do: Become an expert on subjects that are of interest to women (shopping, the science of child raising, cooking, etc.). Become stylish and develop a flair for fashion, and learn to play a musical instrument. No matter who you are, there are always ways in which you can improve yourself. If you are single, you have only yourself to blame! The author, a seasoned shadchan with a sense of humor (imagine that!) is a regular contributor to JewishWorldReview.com He (yes, he’s male) appreciates your feedback.

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SPECIAL REPORT

A Gentile’s View of todAy’s GermAny By williAm e. Grim

’m not Jewish. No one in my family died in the Holocaust. For me, anti-Semitism has always been one of those phenomena that doesn’t really register on my radar, like tribal genocide in Rwanda, a horrible thing that happens to someone else. But I live in a small town outside of Munich on a street that until May of 1945 was named Adolf Hitler Strasse. I work in Munich, a pleasant metropolitan city of a little over a million inhabitants whose Bavarian charm tends to obscure the fact that this city was the birthplace and capital of the Nazi movement. Every day when I go to work I pass by the sites of apartments Hitler lived in, extant buildings in which decisions were made to murder millions of innocent people, and plazas in which book burnings took place, SS troops paraded and people were executed. The proximity to evil has a way of concentrating one’s attention, of putting a physical reality to the textbook narratives of the horrors perpetrated by the Germans. Then the little things start to happen that over a period of time add up to something very sinister. I’m on a bus and a high school boy passes around Grandpa’s red leather-bound copy of Mein Kampf to his friends who respond by saying “coooool!” He then takes out a VCR tape (produced in Switzerland) of “The Great Speeches of Joseph Goebbels.” A few weeks later I’m at a business meeting with four young, highly educated Germans who are polite, charming and soft-spoken to say the least. When the subject matter changes to a business deal with a man in New York named Rubinstein, their nostrils flair, their demeanor attains a threatening mien and one of them actually says, and I’m quoting verbatim here: “The

problem with America is that the Jews have all the money.” They start laughing and another one says, “Yeah, all the Jews care about is money.” I found that this type of anti-Semitic reference in my professional dealings with Germans soon became a leitmotif (to borrow a term made famous by Richard Wagner, another notorious German anti-Semite). In my private meetings with Germans it often happens that they will loosen up after a while and reveal personal opinions and political leanings that were thought to have ceased to exist in a Berlin bunker on April 30, 1945. Maybe it’s because I have blond hair and my last name is of German origin that the Germans feel that I am, or could potentially be, “one of them.” It shows how much they understand what it means to be an American. Whatever the reason, the conversations generally have one or more of these components: 1. It was unfortunate that America and Germany fought each other in World War II because the real enemy was Russia. 2. Yes, the Nazis were excessive, but terrible things happen during wars, and anyway, the scope of the Holocaust has been greatly exaggerated by the American media, which is dominated by Jews. 3. CNN is controlled by American Jews and is anti-Palestinian. (Yes, I know it sounds incredible, but even among the most highly intelligent Germans, even those with a near-native fluency in English, there is the widespread belief that the news network founded by Fidel Castro’s friend Ted Turner, who was married to Hanoi Jane Fonda, is a hotbed of pro-Israeli propaganda.)

4. Almost all Germans were opposed to the Third Reich and nobody in Germany knew anything about the murder of the Jews, but the Jews themselves were really responsible for the Holocaust. 5. Ariel Sharon was worse than Hitler and the Israelis are Nazis. America supports Israel only because Jews control the American government and media. For the first time in my life, then, I became conscious of anti-Semitism. Sure, anti-Semitism exists elsewhere in the world, but nowhere have the consequences been as devastating as in Germany. Looking at it as objectively as possible, 2002 was a banner year for anti-Semitism in Germany. Synagogues were firebombed, Jewish cemeteries desecrated, the No. 1 bestselling novel, Martin Walser’s Death of a Critic, was a thinly-veiled roman a clef containing a vicious anti-Semitic attack on Germany’s best-known literary critic, Marcel Reich-Ranicki (who was a survivor of both the Warsaw ghetto and Auschwitz); the Free Democrat Party unofficially adopted antiSemitism as a campaign tactic to attract Germany’s sizeable Muslim minority; and German revisionist historians began to define German perpetration of World War II and the Holocaust not as crimes against humanity, but as early battles (with regrettable but understandable excesses) in the Cold War against Communism. The situation is so bad that German Jews are advised not to wear anything in public that would identify them as Jewish because their safety cannot be guaranteed. How can this be? Isn’t this the “New Germany” that’s gone 60 years without a Holocaust or even a pogrom, where truth, justice and the German way prevail amidst eco-

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nomic wealth, a high standard of living that is the envy of their European neighbors, and a constitution guaranteeing freedom for everyone regardless of race, creed or national origin? Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s changed? The answer is: absolutely nothing. My thesis is quite simple. While Germany no longer has the military power to enforce the racist ideology of the Nazis and while all extreme manifestations of Nazism are officially outlawed, the internal conditions - that is, the attitudes, world view and cultural assumptions - that led to the rise of Nazism in Germany are still present because they constitute the basic components of German identity. Nazism was not an aberration; it was the distillation of the German psyche into its essential elements. External Nazism may have been utterly defeated in May of 1945; internal Nazism, however, remains, and will always remain, a potential threat as long as there exists a political and/or cultural entity known as Germany. Now hold on a second, I hear many people saying. You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t possibly claim that Germans are as anti-Semitic today as they were during the years 1933-1945. It is true that Germany today is much different than during the Third Reich. What is different is that due to its total defeat by the Allies, Germany today is a client state of America and must do its bidding. That means repression of overt antiSemitism. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bad for business. The other thing that has changed is that, even though Hitler lost World War II, he was phenomenally successful in carrying out his ideological agenda. Germany, indeed virtually all of Europe, is essentially Judenfrei (free of Jews) today due to the efficiency and zeal of the Germans as they perpetrated the Holocaust during the Third Reich. In fact, a very convincing case can be made that Nazism is one of the most successful political programs of all time. It accomplished more of its goals in a shorter amount of time than any other comparable political movement and permanently changed the face and political structure of several continents. Germany is wealthy, stable, relentlessly bourgeois, and for all intents and purposes, free of Jews. Yes, there

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is a tiny minority of Jews, mostly centered in Berlin, and yes, there have been a number of Jews from the former Soviet Union who have emigrated to Germany, but most of the immigrants from Russia are not practicing Jews and do little if anything to promote a unique Jewish-German identity. The result of all this is that Germans today are able to reap the benefits of Hitler’s anti-Semitic policies while paying lip service to the “need to remember.” Young Fritz doesn’t have to be overtly anti-Semitic today because his grandfather’s generation did such a bang-up job of the Holocaust. There just aren’t that many Jews left to hate anymore, and besides, the Germans have their old buddies, the Arabs, to do their hating for them. You might call the overwhelming German support for the Palestinians to be a form of antiSemitism-by-proxy. The German government has made cash payments to the State of Israel, as well as to individual Jews, to settle claims of murder, torture, false imprisonment, slave labor and genocide. Talk to most Germans and you’ll soon discover that they think that the score has been settled between Germany and the Jews, that somehow the return of just a portion of what the Germans stole from the Jews is fair recompense for the deliberate murder of millions of people. If you think the Germans are truly sorry for what they did to the Jews, think again. There’s never been an official “tut mir leid” offered by the Germans to the victims of the Holocaust and their descendants because that would admit culpability. Germany has paid off all claims against it without acknowledging responsibility in the same way that the Ford Motor Company engages in recalls of automobiles. It’s all done to avoid liability. I have previously mentioned that Germans overwhelmingly support the Palestinians as opposed to the Israelis, and that this overwhelming support represents a form of anti-Semitism-byproxy. Germans may claim to be supporting the Palestinians because they think they are an “oppressed people,” but let’s be honest - they are supporting the Palestinians and their Arab handlers because the Palestinians and Arabs share the same ideals as the

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Nazis. There’s a long-standing history of German co-operation with the Arabs. In 1942 Hitler personally assured the Grand Mufti of Jerusalem that as soon as German forces conquered Great Britain, the Jews in Palestine (which was then under control of the British Mandate) would be exterminated. We should also keep in mind that the Arab terrorists who perpetrated the 9/11 atrocities did their planning in Germany. There are several reasons for this. The first is the well-known bungling and de-centralized chaos of the German federal bureaucracy where literally the “linke” hand doesn’t know what the “rechte” hand is doing. The second is that Arab terrorists can count on a substantial number of Germans who share their anti-American and anti-Semitic views. The former members of the SS and Hitler’s praetorian guards, along with their neo-Nazi supporters, who gather weekly in Munich beer halls, made Osama bin Laden an “honorary Aryan” after the 9/11 attack. Mein Kampf is also a bestseller in the Arab world, especially in Saudi Arabia, America‘s putative “friend.” Indeed, there is very little difference between the anti-Semitic rantings of Hitler and those of the so-called “spiritual leaders” of al-Qaeda, Hamas, and Fatah. The Arabs also owe Hitler and the Germans big time. Hitler killed off the Jews, and Konrad Adenauer and his “democratic” descendants replaced them with the Turks. Yes, the Turks aren’t Arabs, but they are Muslim, and although Turkey is a member of NATO and has relations with Israel, many Turks identify and support their radical Arab co-religionists. Turkey remains as fragile a democracy as Weimar Germany during the 1920s. It wouldn’t take much for Turkey to fall into the dark side of Muslim extremism. The end result of Muslim immigration into Germany has been twofold: 1. It allows the Germans to feign liberalism and being open to freedom and diversity; and 2. By replacing the Jews they murdered with Muslims, who for the most part are as viciously anti-Semitic as were the Nazis, the Germans have cynically assured that those few Jews who remain in

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Germany will be unable to reassert political power even in a minority role. A final point I would like to make concerning the reasons for the resurgence of anti-Semitism in Germany is one that many will find at odds with the prima-facie evidence, or even appear to stretch the boundaries of common sense. Yet, I ask you to consider carefully my line of reasoning. In many respects Germany got away with the Holocaust without paying much of a price. Yes, many Germans died as a result of German perpetration of World War II and the Holocaust, and yes, there was much physical destruction in the country, but the situation is like the little boy who steals a cookie from the tray when it is cooling on the kitchen table. For his efforts he may have gotten his hand slapped by his mother, but the stolen cookie remains eaten nonetheless. After having committed the worst crimes in the history of humankind, the Germans were allowed to regain their sovereignty after only ten years; their infrastructure was completely rebuilt thanks to the generosity of the American people; and relatively few Germans were brought to trial for their monstrous crimes. Even those who were tried and convicted received relatively short sentences or had those reduced or commuted in general amnesties. For example, some members of the Einsatzkommandos, those Germans who, before the construction of the death camps, hunted and murdered Jews by the hundreds of thousands, received sentences of as little as five years imprisonment. If there were true justice in the world, Germany would no longer exist as a separate country, but would have long ago had its territory divided up and dispersed among the Allies. It was an unfortunate historical coincidence that the Cold War began just as Germany was at last being brought to task for its many crimes and atrocities extending back to the First World War. The new threat of the Soviet Union took precedence over a just settling of accounts with Germany. The tragic result is that many of the countries raped and despoiled by Germany, such as the Czech Republic and

Poland, are just now coming out of decades of economic decline, while Germany - fat, sassy, arrogant, selfsatisfied and essentially Judenfrei - has enjoyed four decades of undeserved economic prosperity. We canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t turn back the clock to redress all of the historical wrongs that have been committed by the Germans, but there are a number of things that can be done to assure that Germany can never again be in a position to threaten the rest of the civilized world. First and foremost is the realiza-

tion that, while not all Germans are anti-Semitic, there is an anti-Semitic tendency within German culture that extends back to the time of Martin Luther. Germans are instinctively antiSemitic in the same way that Americans are instinctively freedom-loving. Anti-Semitism has been and unfortunately remains the default ideology of the German people. All things being equal, Germans will instinctively support the enemies of the State of Israel. Therefore, America will need to monitor closely and be ready and politically

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willing to intervene at a moment’s notice in German affairs when it appears that Germany is back-sliding into antiSemitism. Additionally, it should be a goal of American foreign policy to oppose and to accelerate the dismemberment of the European Union. We must not allow German domination of the EU to accomplish through parliamentary maneuvering and brokered deals what Hitler and the Germans were unable to accomplish during the Third Reich. Given Germany’s resurgent antiSemitism (and that of France as well), a strong, German-dominated EU that tolerates and even benignly encourages anti-Semitism, and is diplomatically allied with the Arab world, is potentially the greatest threat to Judaism since Nazi Germany and a major threat to the United States as well. The enemies of Israel are the enemies of the United States. Let all Jews and Americans stand united as we proclaim “Never again” to both the Holocaust and 9/11. William E. Grim is a writer who lives in Germany and is a native of Columbus, Ohio.

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I S R A E L

33 Years of Heaven on Earth By Dov Shurin

here’s nothing like Lag (33 days) B’Omer in Meron, right? Yes, I went this year, as I do every year. And my prayer this year was that Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai should break a ‘Gizehra’ and send a baby boy to a childless couple whom I’m acquainted with. As I see the bonfire on the roof above the tomb of the great Tanna, I pray that Rabbi Shimon should intercede on their behalf, and that the sefer in my hands, full of Rashbi stories, should open to the perfect page related to that prayer. Sure enough, I opened to a page that tells of how Rashbi succeeded in getting the Roman Caesar to nullify the decrees forbidding bris mila and taharas hamishpacha!! What a promising sign and message that was; that the great Kabbalistic giant WILL intercede for the couple. This is one of many successful Lag B’Omer tefilos I’ve had in Meron. But now I was just thinking, “Hey, I’m starting my 33rd (Lag) year in Eretz Yisroel. I’ll call my next Country Yossi Magazine article, “33 Years of Heaven on Earth.” After Lag (33) B’Omer we count seventeen more days till the holiday of Shavuos and the giving of the Torah. 17, in numerology, adds up to the word TOV meaning good. But things weren’t very good for the 49 people who were shot down in cold blood in Orlando Florida on Shavuos night, while Jews the world over spent the entire night studying the Holy Torah in preparation for ‘seeing the sounds and the lightening and the sounds of the Shofar, the mountain smoking… (Shmos,20, verse 15). On Shavuos we hear the Ten Commandments from Hashem, the most obvi-

ous of which, for all the people of the entire world, is the commandment, “Thou shalt NOT MURDER!” And America experienced its worst single slaughter ever, exactly on Shavuos night! Violating, 49 times, the “Thou shalt not murder” commandment! This commandment is reminiscent of the 6th day of creation, and the very first murder - When Kayin murdered his brother Hevel in a religious quarrel, over sacrifices they both brought! Hevel is, in fact, a hint to Islam. How? The first letter Heh (5) is the amount of times that Muslims pray each day. Beis (2), the second letter, hints to the two major Muslim holidays, and Lamed (30) is the amount of days that they fast during their holy month, Ramadan, which happened to fall this year in the month of Sivan, and on the night of what the Islamic State, Isis, would term, the ‘holy’ massacre in Orlando! Let’s also take note that since ‘Hevel’ is a hint to Islam, in our ‘Aleinu’ prayer, the words, “For they bow down to Hevel (meaning ‘a vapor-like- nothingness’)” were forced out of our prayer by the Muslim ‘censor,’ during our long exile. And remember the great significance of how the Torah ends the sixth day of creation by stating, “And it was evening and it was morning, Yom HaShishi, (THAT special 6th day).” The final day of creation was stated so emphatically that Chazal, our sages, explained the secret of this reference. Yom HaShishi refers to the fact that Creation was all about the giving of the Torah on Shavuos, the 6th day of Sivan. And from the first Rosh Hashana, which was our first ‘Seventh day,’ all of the creation was in a motionless, frozen state, until the arrival of the ‘Yom HaShishi’ - the sixth day of the month of Sivan - the special day that the Torah was to be formally given to the Jews 2448

years after the world’s creation! Now let’s zero in on the peculiarity of the Shavuos massacre. We Jews count 49 days of the Omer from the night after the Pesach Seder until Shavuos, which is the 50th day. Now this Muslim, for religious reasons, murdered 49 goyim and he became the Atzeres (meaning ‘held over’), the 50th victim. AND HIS NAME WAS ‘OMER!’ So what does this mean to us? We have to conclude, with a sigh and a hope: “May this be a great kapora for all of Am Yisroel!” With Trump leading the battle cry, we need to be prepared for the three wars that the Bnei Yishmael will start at the end of time. One war at sea, one war on land and one war near Jerusalem, as stated in the Zohar of Rashbi, regarding the Posuk, “Lu Yishmael yichyeh l’fonecha” (Bereshis 17, verse 18). These wars are all hinted to, in the 3 strikes in Orlando: 1) The day before Shavuos a female singer was shot in cold blood while signing autographs in Orlando. This is a hint to the Muslim war near Jerusalem, which is constantly associated with singing and song (Od Yishama). 2) On the day after Shavuos, a crocodile came out of the sea and, nebach, pulled a child to his death in the water, at Disney World in Orlando! This is a hint to the Muslim war at sea. 3) The club massacre being, of course, a hint to the eventual Muslim land campaign. The first tragedy involved a woman, the second tragedy involved a child, and the third involved men. And, as Trump states, “The Islamic State doesn’t differentiate. They abuse EVERYONE: Men, women and children.” May we, who have received the Holy Torah on that 6th day, Shavuos, all merit to return to our land and to see the fulfillment of the last words of the 2nd blessing of the Shema: “That your days and the days of your children shall be many, on the land that Hashem promised you.” And it ends with the amazing assurance that we will have “K’yimay HaShomayim al ha’aretz,” which translates to ‘Heaven on Earth!’ That’s what I’ve lived and felt in Eretz Yisroel: 33years of Heaven on earth. Thank You so much, Hashem! A gut zummer. dovshurin.com

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little bit of their own… in order to create this common ground.”

T I M E L I N E

A. Mao Tse Tung B. Hugo Chavez C. Barack Obama D. None of the above 5) “I certainly think the free-market has failed.” A. Karl Marx B. Lenin C. Barack Obama D. None of the above 6) “I think it’s time to send a clear message to what has become the most profitable sector in (the) entire economy that they are being watched.”

Six trivia questions to see how much history you really know. Be honest; it’s kind of fun and revealing. If you don’t know the answer, make your best guess. Answer all of the questions (no cheating) before looking at the answers. Who said the following? 1) “We’re going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good.”

A. Lenin B. Mussolini C. Barack Obama D. None of the above 3) “We can’t just let business as usual go on, and that means something has to be taken away from some people.” A. Nikita Khrushchev B. Boris Yeltsin C. Barack Obama D. None of the above 4) “We have to build a political consensus and that requires people to give up a

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1. D. None of the above. Statement was made by Hillary Clinton 6/29/2004

NOW A SHORT TEST:

2. D. None of the above. Statement was made by Hillary Clinton 5/29/2007

Self-evident truths: It is the poor who habitually elect Democrats… yet they are still POOR. “You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich. You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong. You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift. You cannot lift the wage earner up by pulling the wage payer down. You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred. You cannot build character and courage by taking away people’s initiative and independence.

2) “It’s time for a new beginning, for an end to government of the few, by the few, and for the few… and to replace it with shared responsibility, for shared prosperity.”

Ok, now turn over for the answers…

3. D. None of the above. Statement was made by Hillary Clinton 6/4/2007

instein once said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

A. Karl Marx B. Joseph Stalin C. Barack Obama D. None of the above

4. D. None of the above. Statement was made by Hillary Clinton 6/4/2007

You cannot help people permanently by doing for them, what they could and should do for themselves.” - Abraham Lincoln “Any man who thinks he can be happy and prosperous by letting the government take care of him had better take a much closer look at the American Indian.” - Henry Ford

5. D. None of the above. Statement was made by Hillary Clinton 6/4/2007

AMERICA’S CHOICE?

NO PEEKING!

6. D. None of the above. Statement was made by Hillary Clinton 9/2/2005

AN ECLECT IC COL LECTION OF NEWS ITEMS, FEATURES AND HUMOR WE JUST COULDN’T FIT ANYWHERE ELSE!

A. Pinochet B. Saddam Hussein C. Barack Obama D. None of the above

Please do something for your country, and pass this on!

SIMANOWITZ BILL PROTECTS UNCLAIMED BODIES

or three years, Senator Simcha Felder and Assemblyman Mike Simanowitz have been working together to protect the dignity of the deceased. Now the New York State Senate and Assembly have passed their bill to prohibit the release of unclaimed bodies without the consent of the deceased’s spouse or next of kin. “Currently, unclaimed bodies can be released after only 48 hours,” said Senator Felder. “In many cases, family would object to what takes place after the body is released. People want to bury their loved ones accord-

ing to their own traditions, but by the time they discover their loss, it’s often too late. Our bill would require the written consent of a spouse or next of kin before an unclaimed body can be released.” “Our current laws do not protect the religious or personal rights of New Yorkers,” said Assemblyman Simanowitz. “We have seen repeated cases of unclaimed bodies delivered for dissection without consideration of religious or personal wishes. This has caused much grief for loved ones who are already mourning their loss. Our legislation would ensure that without consent from next of kin or the

deceased, all unclaimed bodies would be respectfully buried. “This is about respect for the dead - it’s about decency,” said Rabbi Yaakov Meyer, Director and Founder of Misaskim in applauding Senator Felder’s bill. “Just as New York State requires a signed consent for donating organs, it should certainly require consent before allowing a body to be used for teaching purposes.” Simanowitz and Felder recognized Dr. Barbara Sampson, the Chief Medical Examiner, New York City, as well as Simcha Eichenstein from Mayor De Blasio’s Office of State Legislative Affairs, for their efforts on behalf of the bill. “I’m very pleased that both the Senate and Assembly agreed overwhelmingly that unclaimed bodies should be treated with respect,” added Senator Felder.

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CONTROVERSY

TODAY’S TOPIC: Who’s Worse - Trump or Clinton? Mw13: I don’t think either of these two candidates are particularly good choices for running our country, but it does look like these are the options that we’re going to have come November. So who do you think would be worse in regards to: The American economy? American foreign policy and national security? Supporting Israel?

CopyMachine: Going out on a fence here… But looking at everything from an outside point of view, I don’t think it’s so radical for a Presidential candidate to endear himself to all different sorts of people. He wants the votes from anyone and everyone - even if they have a shady, disgusting following. Okay, you can stone me now - but use only small pebbles please.

Akuperman: Clinton will be eight more years of Obama, though perhaps the first two with a Democratic Congress since 2009-2010 and all the mischief that was done, also assume several radical left-wing Supreme Court justices, which will seriously threaten our community. Trump is unknown. He’s basically a Nixon or Eisenhower-type Republican, but with made-for-TV clown behaviors. His anti-immigration and anti-trade policies could cripple the US, but Hillary won’t be all that different. He might back down from those policies, and especially from his anti-Muslim and anti-Hispanic policies, since Trump’s nativism seems to be a media stunt. His actual policies probably will be normal for a moderate Republican, and he might throw some bones to the conservatives. Sanders would be devastatingly bad.

Yytz: Louis Farrakhan did not actually endorse Trump. Actually, he wrote on his Facebook wall recently that a Trump presidency would make the country go to the dumps, or some such nonsense. Trump’s seeming-encouragement of violence among his supporters is the main thing that troubles me (since there are certainly parallels with Mussolini’s blackshirts and Putin’s thugs). Building a wall with Mexico is actually a pretty reasonable security measure and administrative policy (Hillary was even for it at some point).

Charliehall: You would have supported anyone against Mussolini had you known what he was going to do to you. This is no different. That even a single Jew could consider a vote for the candidate of Louis Farrakhan and David Duke shows that we do not learn the lessons of history. MDG: Dr. Hall, I believe that you know that Trump has a Jewish daughter and Jewish grandchildren. Why anti-Semites will vote for him is beyond me. BTW a grand wizard of the KKK in California just recently endorsed Hillary.

Squeak: Charlie - you are raving. I don’t know if you actually believe what you say about Trump or if you are just so in love with your candidates that you are willing to spew whatever drivel you think helps discredit their opponents. Remember, Farrakhan supported Obama openly… called him the messiah. Lots of super shady characters endorse and fawn over your favorite characters, and I don’t think it bothers you a bit there. Mdd: Squeak, if Trump declares war on Mexico to make it pay for the wall, are you volunteering for the Army? Avi K: Trump says so many different things that it is hard to know what he thinks. He rails against corporations leaving America but his name-brand clothes are made in China. He was endorsed by Duke (although he repudiated him) but is proud of his frum gioret daughter and Jewish grandchildren (kashia on

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Duke). Clinton, on the other hand, is a known enemy of Jewish rights to Eretz Yisrael, a professional liar (she was fired from a staff position on the Watergate committee for unethical behavior) and may just be indicted (if Obama doesn’t pardon her just before he steps down). Redleg: This is what politics in the U.S. has come to: A bloviating bully or a female Richard Nixon. The evil of two lessers. I have voted in every general election since 1964, either in person or by absentee ballot, but I think I may sit this one out. Akuperman: Trump is a media personality based on the character he developed for his show. What he’ll be like when he decides to “get real” is anyone’s guess, but it’s unlikely that it’s as bad as the loudmouth bully he played on TV. Schwartzy: We have a good sense of who Hillary Clinton is and who she would surround herself with in office. Trump, on the other hand, is much harder to read. I would expect him to do what Ross Perot did when we get closer to the general election time in the fall, and that is to try to unify the country by bringing in some Dems as aides like Perot did with the late Hamilton Jordan. Rabbiofberlin: Akuperman: There is not a scintilla of evidence that The Dumpster is anything else than what we see. He is a bully, a narcissist, a liar and he has already destroyed the Republican Party. If you doubt that, note what he said one morning on one of his favorite TV programs -I heard it on radio, btw. He was asked who he consults with on important matters. His answer? “Myself - I have a good brain.” Narcissism on steroids and totally unsuitable to be President. Akuperman: Rabbiofberlin: If Trump is such a nativist, why did he marry two foreign women, and why did he not disown his daughter for converting to Judaism - unless his nativism is just part of the act. Trump claims to be against foreign trade, yet he’s an international businessman whose global businesses depend on free trade. Most politicians will “say” what their listeners want to hear, and most politicians tend to be highly narcissistic (honestly, humility in a politician would be a severe handicap). We can tell from his record, in areas where his past actions match his rhetoric, that Trump is for big government, does not worry about debts, and has no problem with government confiscating people’s property - positions that would make him into a liberal Republican or a Democrat (think Rockefeller or Nixon - not Goldwater or Reagan). While we can be certain of Hillary’s mediocrity, we can’t be certain what we would be getting with Trump, which may or may not be good. Rabbiofberlin: Akuperman: You cannot have it both ways. If you think that he is such a practical person and that he is only telling people what they want to hear, then how can you trust him on anything? Neither Eisenhower nor Nixon was ever that cynical. In my eyes - and many other people’s eyes - he is crass, crude, and has no principles whatsoever. Not exactly the kind of person you want to become President. We may not like Hillary but she is a pretty constant figure - not mediocre at all - and sometimes you prefer the devil you know to the devil you don’t know.

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Ocho sinco: The difference between Trump and Clinton is like, if you have to get to your sister’s wedding and your car broke down. You can either take a $150 car service and pay lots of money and it’s bad cuz you have to lose a lot of money. But you know it’s bad and how bad it is. Or you can hitchhike, which could mean you get there for free and it’ll be awesome. But the amount of potential disaster is unknown because you could find yourself at the end of the night in someone’s trunk tied up, or worse, in Baltimore. (And Bernie Sanders is like taking your $150 for the cab and burning it, then hitchhiking.) Do I need to explain the nimshal?

Squeak: All the name calling in the world won’t help your cause. As American politicians sink lower and lower, people keep saying how frustrated they are, and how disgusted they are, and how disconnected they feel. People want change. That was even a campaign slogan once. Here you have someone who stands up and says I can do better. He is transparent, he is different, he is famous, he is interesting, he is exciting. People want that more than they want another bland corporate puppet chanting tired and empty slogans. I believe Trump will be interesting. I do not believe for one second that he will discriminate against Muslims or against Hispanics. I do not believe that he will build a wall with Mexico, but even if he does I don’t believe he will ever even suggest declaring war on Mexico to pay for it. That is just an absurd fabrication by the media to manipulate the weak-minded. If nothing else, as I’ve said before, I prefer Trump to any of the politicians simply because at this point it’s clear that anyone who is capable of getting himself elected President has no business being president.

Sam2: Squeak: Trump’s attacks against freedom to protest, free speech, and (most importantly, by far) freedom of the press set a terrifying dictatorial precedent.

Squeak: Hillary is a hands-on murderer. Whether it’s actively bumping off whitewater threats or taxi drivers in NY, or through negligence by ignoring impending terror threats, she has more layers of blood than skin on her hands. Hillary is a liar. She says whatever works in the moment, whether it’s defending her husband or pretending snipers attacked her. Today she says Israel is her priority, tomorrow she’s bowing to Arab terrorists. Hillary is as corrupt and as buyable as they come, whether it’s selling pardons for votes or taking absurd fees for speaking from Wall Street companies. There is nothing she won’t do for the right price. If anyone is a potential Mussolini, it’s her. Imagine if Hitler came to power while she was president. Do you think she would oppose him or befriend him? Only blindness or expectation of personal gain could bring you to vote for her.

Doomsday: Clinton is worse. Democrats and Establishment Republicans want to establish tyranny in the US. Google and YouTube: Agenda 21 (UN Proposal). Since both Democrats and Establishment Republicans HATE Trump he gets my vote - enemy of my enemy is my friend (usually).

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SUMMER 2016

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B O O K E XC E R P T

A RAINY DAY

he’atta… mashiv haruach umorid hageshem… liv’rachah v’lo lik’lalah… L’chayim v’lo L’maves. You (Hashem) cause the wind to blow and the rain to fall… for a blessing and not for a curse… for life and not for death. - Mussaf, Shemini Atzeres Rain is both a brachah in and of itself and also the source of many other blessings, such as drinking water for plants, animals, and human beings. As such, rain is something which we Jews are encouraged to never take for granted and for which we daven three times each weekday during the winter. Without rain, life would cease to exist. There are times, however, when rain is not seen as the blessing that it is. When it rains on our parade, picnic or party, for example, the water pourReprinted and excerpted with permission of Feldheim Publishers © 2016.

ing down from the sky is most unwelcome. There is, perhaps, no other time and place where rain is more unwelcome than at summer camp. It is there that activities are interrupted, events are canceled, and boredom threatens to rear its ugly head. Summer camp is a wonderland which is generally bustling with activities to delight, instruct, and entertain children. But when it rains at camp, most of these things are unavailable. Campers can easily become bored and the counselors become desperate in their search to find productive, satisfying activities for their charges. One August day in 1995, the heavens opened up and the rain came pouring down in a typical, runof-the-mill summer storm in the Catskill Mountains of New York State. This sudden change in weather was most undesired by campers as well as counselors, who saw the rain as a great misfortune. As it turned out, however, the rain eventually led to an enormous blessing, as can be seen from the following two stories. The twelve eleven-year-old girls in Bunk 3 of the Junior Division of Camp Kayitz were getting especially rambunctious. This was the third rainy day in less than a week. So when a thunder clap had suddenly brought the girls to attention, they had all chimed in with, “Oh, no, it’s raining again!” The two teen-aged counselors of Bunk 3, Shoshana Bloom and Rina Erenreich, looked at each other and rolled their eyes. “If we have another water fight in this bunk like we had on Monday, I think I’m going to quit this job,”

Shoshana warned her co-counselor. Rina, always the more practical of the pair, leaped off her bed and announced to the bunk, “If any of you have a bathing suit on the line, you’d better bring it in quickly.” Twelve girls immediately scurried out into the rain, squealing with delight. They retrieved their bathing suits from the clothesline behind the bunk and rushed back inside. Dripping from the rain, they draped their half-dry bathing suits over hooks, nails, and any protrusion they could find. The thrill of running out in the rain seemed to whet the girls’ appetites for more excitement. “Let’s see who can jump up and reach the light bulb,” Zissy, a tall, athletic girl with braces, challenged her bunk mates. “Uh, not so fast, Zissy,” Rina cautioned, as she dodged the dripping water from a wet bathing suit hanging over the rafters. “That might not be such a safe thing to do.” Rina reached for her poncho and threw it over her head. “Where are you going?” asked Shoshana, suddenly feeling abandoned. “I think I’ll run over to the social hall and see if we can use it for a game of machanayim,” Rina replied, as she pulled on the drawstrings of her poncho hood. A few minutes later, Rina returned, soaked from the rain. From her dejected expression, Shoshana immediately understood the outcome of her friend’s expedition. “Another bunk got there first, right?” Shoshana asked. “How’d you guess?” Rina replied. “Do you have any idea what we can do with these kids today? We’ve just got to figure out something to keep them busy.” “Did you check to see if the family dining room is empty? Maybe we could do something there.” “Na, that’s taken too. Mrs. Chayal is using the family dining room for one of her C.P.R. classes. She must teach there every Thursday during this period.”

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SUMMER 2016

“But she probably doesn’t need the whole dining room for her class. Maybe we could use the other end?” “You don’t know Mrs. Chayal very well, do you? She insists on absolute quiet during her classes. I remember when I was a camper and took C.P.R. with her - she was very strict about not allowing even the slightest disturbance. Believe me, she’d never let our bunk play in the dining room at the same time that she’s giving one of her classes.” “Hey, I’ve got an idea!” Shoshana announced excitedly. “Why don’t we ask Mrs. Chayal if our bunk can observe her C.P.R. class? If the girls promise to keep absolutely quiet, maybe she’ll agree.” “Hmm… it’s definitely worth a shot. I’ll go back and ask her. I don’t mind going out again because I’m soaked already anyway. Maybe if I explain to her how desperate we are to find something for our bunk to do, she’ll take pity on us.” All that could be heard as Rina entered the large family dining room was the clear voice of Mrs. Sterna Chayal, the camp nurse. Rina tried to walk in quietly but the squishing of her wet sneakers announced her arrival. She asked her question politely. “I’m sorry,” the nurse replied sincerely, “but New York State law requires that no one under the age of fourteen is allowed to take C.P.R. classes. And the girls in Bunk 3 are eleven-year-olds.” Mrs. Chayal peered over her glasses for emphasis. “Only I’m not asking for you to teach them C.P.R.,” Rina explained. “I’m only asking if you’ll let them watch your class just for today. These girls are bored out of their minds because this is the third rainy day this week… If Shoshana and I assure you that they won’t make a peep, would you please let them come?” Much to Rina’s surprise, Mrs. Chayal relented, and Rina ran back to Bunk 3 with the good news. Together with Shoshana, Rina herded the excited campers into their raincoats, out of the bunk and quietly into the dining room. The two counselors and twelve campers took off their raincoats and practically tiptoed over to the back row of the C.P.R. class which was already

under way. Mrs. Chayal had just finished her introduction to cardiopulmonary resuscitation, and now she was in the midst of demonstrating how to apply the appropriate maneuver to save a choking infant. The bored campers suddenly had something to do, and they absorbed the lesson with great interest. When the class was finished, Rina and Shoshana went over to Mrs. Chayal and enthusiastically thanked her on behalf of the grateful girls of Bunk 3. They then brought the girls back to their bunk to daven Minchah and get ready for supper. Five months after the end of camp, on a bitter cold winter evening, Sterna Chayal received a phone call from Mrs. Tova Sherman, whose daughter Zissy was in Bunk 3 during the summer. Mrs. Sherman was calling to express her gratitude and to relate an episode which took place earlier in the week at the Sherman home. The Shermans had just sat down to dinner; a hectic day was winding down and a peaceful sense of calm settled over the family. Dinner was ready on time and the older children had gotten a head start on their homework. In addition, Yaakov Sherman had come home earlier than usual from his office in Manhattan, which put his wife Tova in a better frame of mind. Suddenly this peaceful scene was shattered by Tova’s bone-chilling, shrill scream as she stared into tenmonth-old Duvi’s playpen. “Duvi, Duvi, what’s the matter?” Tova shrieked, scooping up her infant son. “He’s turning blue, he must be choking,” she shouted at the rest of the family. “Quick, call Hatzolah!” Yaakov leapt up from the table and ran to his wife, staring at his choking baby. He froze in panic. The other children also ran to see what was happening, as a sense of terror and confusion filled the Sherman home. “Call Hatzolah, call Hatzolah!” Tova kept shouting, now in tears. Yaakov lurched for the phone. In the midst of all the commotion and chaos, one still, calm voice stood out: Zissy’s. “Why don’t you try the choking infant maneuver on Duvi first?” she asked. “I’ve never even heard of that ma-

neuver,” Tova shouted back in panic. “But I have,” Zissy replied softly. “Then do it!” Tova cried, thrusting Duvi into Zissy’s arms. The eleven-year-old girl confidently took her baby brother into her arms. With the heel of her hand, she delivered five sharp blows to his upper back, counting them out loud. Then she quickly turned him around and pushed her forefinger and middle finger into his upper chest five times, again counting out loud. The entire Sherman family stood mesmerized, gaping in awe at Zissy’s confident command of the situation. She appeared to know exactly what to do. After banging on Duvi’s back and then pushing on his chest, Zissy repeated the procedure. Suddenly everyone heard a soft gurgling sound, followed by a cough. Then a penny flew out of Duvi’s mouth and rolled across the floor. Duvi took a deep breath and let out a loud wail as his natural color returned immediately. Everyone gasped in amazement, and the room resounded with expressions of joy, relief and gratitude to Hashem. When Tova finally calmed down, she dried her tears and turned to her daughter. “Where in the world,” she asked, “did you learn how to do that?!” Zissy then explained that her bunk had been allowed only to observe one C.P.R. class during the summer, which just “happened” to be learning about the proper maneuver for saving choking infants… And her bunk only “happened” to be allowed to listen in on that class because they had nothing else to do on a rainy day. About six weeks later, Mrs. Chayal received a call from Mrs. Bracha Lerner, another mother of a Camp Kayitz camper… also from Bunk 3. She too had an amazing story to relate about her eleven-year-old daughter, Chanie. And she wanted to say thank you. Chanie had been babysitting for some neighbors’ children the night before. While both parents were out, their infant son began to choke. His brothers and sisters became hysterical, and Chanie came running. Some of the children were crying while others started screaming in panic.

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Taking immediate command of the crisis, Chanie walked over to the wiggling, blue baby and picked him up in her arms. She then went through the proper procedure for saving a choking infant. Something became dislodged from the baby’s throat, and a few seconds later he spit out a small piece of Lego. Later that night, Mrs. Lerner heard how her daughter had literally saved the life of their neighbor’s baby by calmly and correctly applying the appropriate maneuver. It was then that Mrs. Lerner first learned of how Chanie had spent part of one rainy afternoon the previous summer at Camp Kayitz. Bursting with pride and a desire to give the camp nurse some much-deserved nachas, Mrs. Lerner called Mrs. Chayal the next day to tell her what resulted from one hour of one of her C.P.R. classes. Little did Mrs. Lerner know that Mrs. Sherman had called a few weeks earlier to give Mrs. Chayal similar dividends for her one-hour investment. “Thank you so much for calling,”

Mrs. Chayal said, flushed with emotion. “It was so thoughtful of you to call and tell me what happened. You should be very proud of your daughter. It takes a lot of courage and confidence for an eleven-year-old to respond so well to such an emergency.” “Oh, no, Mrs. Chayal, it is I who must thank you for allowing the girls from my daughter’s bunk to sit in on one of your C.P.R. classes this past summer. If not for that, my story might have had a very different ending.” Within two months, on two separate occasions, the lives of two innocent infants hang in the balance. They each have ingested a common household object. In one case, the parents helplessly watch in horror as their baby turns blue. In the other case, the parents are not even home at the time. In each case, the infant’s siblings look on in fear and shock. At such times, help is needed immediately. Even the lightning speed of a Hatzolah ambulance may not be fast enough to save these lives. How can these tiny souls be saved and who can save them?!

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The One Who “never slumbers or sleeps,” Hashem, is always there, watching and guarding His people. And in order to make sure that the help arrives just where and when it is needed, other events sometimes need to take place many months earlier to pave the way. These events, in the form of the righteous acts of others, are planted well ahead of time to ensure that the help that is needed arrives on time. In these two cases, what was needed was someone - anyone! - familiar with the proper procedure to save choking infants, to be on hand to save these tender, precious souls. And in these two cases, one of the events which paved the way was the willingness of a camp nurse to open her C.P.R. class to a bunk of bored eleven-year-olds. And, sometimes, in order to prompt the seeds of righteousness to sprout forth at just the right time in order to save lives, Hashem has to irrigate the seeds in a common, yet miraculous way, by causing some unwelcome weather… like a rainy day. As heard from Mrs. Sterna Chayal Far Rockaway, New York

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1. Bring the House Down - Avraham Fried - Aderet 2. Energy - Eli Marcus - Aderet 3. Chaim Yisrael - Asafti Rega'im - Aderet

1. Bring the House Down - Avraham Fried - Aderet 2. We are a Miracle - Yakov Shwekey - Nigun 3. Energy - Eli Marcus - Aderet

SUMMER 2016 1. Bring the House Down - Avraham Fried - Aderet 2. Shira Pinchas - Nigun 3. Tzaddikim - Farkas - Nigun

IMPORTANT NOTE These ratings are supplied by the 7 major Jewish music outlets listed here, based on their actual sales over the last thirty days in the Greater New York area. The list does not reflect total sales of any CD. It does not include sales in other stores, cities or countries (Israel!). The list is designed to be an indication of whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s currently popular in New York. Although every effort has been made to ensure fairness and accuracy, this list is published for entertainment purposes only and Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for any inaccuracies or misrepresentations. 100

1. Bring the House Down - Avraham Fried - Aderet 2. Energy - Eli Marcus - Aderet 3. Hakhel - 8th day - Aderet

1. Bring the House Down - Avraham Fried - Aderet 2. We are a Miracle - Yakov Shwekey - Nigun 3. The Ungrateful Guest - Rabbi Meir Erps

1. Bring the House Down - Avraham Fried - Aderet 2. Energy - Eli Marcus - Aderet 3. Chaim Yisrael - Asafti Rega'im - Aderet

1. Shtetl - Rachel's Place - Aderet 2. Twins from France Cholent - Aderet 3. Bella and the Baroness - Aderet

1. Shtetl - Rachel's Place - Aderet 2. Barons and Bankers - Aderet 3. Mali - Malky Weingarten - Nigun

1. Shtetl - Rachel's Place - Aderet 2. Mali - Malky Weingarten - Nigun 3. Roots: Journey Home - Aderet

SUMMER 2016 1. Shtetl - Rachel's Place - Aderet 2. Mali - Malky Weingarten - Nigun 3. Roots: Journey Home - Aderet

IMPORTANT NOTE 1. Roots: Journey Home - Aderet 2. Bella Bracha Goes to a Wedding - Aderet 3. Twins from France Cholent - Aderet

1. Mali - Malky Weingarten - Nigun 2. Shtetl - Rachel's Place - Aderet 3. Bella Bracha and the Talent Show - Aderet

1. Very Best of Uncle Moishy - Suki and Ding 2. It's Amazing - Suki and Ding 3. Roots: Journey Home - Aderet

These ratings are supplied by the 7 major Jewish music outlets listed here, based on their actual sales over the last thirty days in the Greater New York area. The list does not reflect total sales of any DVD. It does not include sales in other stores, cities or countries (Israel!). The list is designed to be an indication of whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s currently popular in New York. Although every effort has been made to ensure fairness and accuracy, this list is published for entertainment purposes only and Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for any inaccuracies or misrepresentations. 101

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H U M O R

Summertime Fun

t’s amazing how time flies. Days, weeks and months seem to just meld into each other, leaving you with just a blur of a memory. Seasons quickly come and go, and years just pass you by at lightning speed. It almost feels like you’ve boarded a rocket to Mars with no stops. Truth be told, some times of the year go by quicker than others. Summer is one of those seasons that just always passes by at hyper-speed. Summer is undoubtedly the nicest time of year in New York and yet it has to go by so quickly. Why can’t the cold winter ever go by as fast? To add insult to injury, New York City is one of those regions that basically have only two seasons each year. For the larger portion of the year you have the extremely long, extremely cold winter. Then, in the blink of an eye, you move right into the scorching hot summer weather. No warning, no smooth transition, just boom - it’s the toasting, roasting summer. Then again, after only a couple of short weeks of the unbearable hot weather you’re hoisted and foisted right back into the frigid cold. These sudden and abrupt changes are enough to throw off anyone’s equilibrium. The oddity is that as quick as the two months of summer go by, that’s exactly the inverse-correlation to how slowly the week before and after the summer season goes by. Those two isolated weeks, the one before and the one after camp, seem to take place in their own individual time zone. As soon as school is out and the kids are

home, time seems to come to an absolute crawl. During these two weeks of noman’s-land time, children take the liberty to completely and entirely goof off. It’s as if time does not exist for them. They make no plans to do anything, or even to wake up, for that matter. So while parents are stuck in their regular schedule, burdened with their usual daily responsibilities, they now have to become both a school principal and a camp head counselor to motivate and entertain their kids. During this odious time of year, children like to imagine that they don’t have to do anything at all. Children think that during this time period the whole world does not exist. Or maybe they believe that it does exist except that everyone else is operating on the same abnormal schedule as they are. Why is it that when there’s no school, children think they can wake up at any time of the day? Why is it that children think that when there’s no school they are exempt from all work and no longer have to do their chores? Why is it that when there’s no school children think they can spend all day out on trips, shopping and eating out at cafes and restaurants? In what parallel universe are we excused of all duties and devoid of any and all responsibilities just because there is no school? In what crazy world is a year ten months? On what insane planet do children get to have so much free time while the adults slave away? In what wacky reality do children get to spend all of their day squandering their parents’ hard-earned money with no re-

gard? For the entire adult human population, the world functions on a timetable of a twelve-month-year. As far as we know it the world spins on an axis that takes twelve months to complete fully - school schedule notwithstanding. Why is it that if you’re a minor a different rule applies? Truth be told, this is not actually the case for children all over the world. There are still some parts of the world where children don’t act this way. There are still some places where, even when there is no school, children don’t slack off. There are still some places in the world where children know that even though they are not within the confines of a school building and under the strict rule of their principal, they have to continue holding up their end and are responsible for taking care of their duties. In most of the Asian cultures you will not find any children gallivanting around aimlessly in the street just because school is out. In these parts of the world you will see children who are focused and regimented. This is because in these countries, when the school year ends the sneaker factory opens with full-force. So while bratty little American kids search the streets creating needs for themselves, their Asian counterparts are hard at work fabricating those actual items that they are about to buy. So, the lesson is quite clear. If you want to be a good parent and want to make it through the summer season with your cerebral cortex intact, some planning is in order. This year, when your children are let out of school and they close the building down for the summer, your first item on the agenda will be to visit your travel agent and buy tickets to China for your little sheffellech. This way they can spend their free time being productive by working eighteen hours a day at a factory making sneakers. Chaptzem is a heimishe blogger that authors the Chaptzem Blog, the most popular heimishe website. The Chaptzem Blog has been quoted many times in the mainstream media and is viewed by thousands daily. www.chaptzem.blogspot.com

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SUMMER 2016

u"ga, ct-zun,

H U M O R Shoulda Let Him Nap

Dig Deep

A lawyer and a senior Rebbe to his Chassidim: I citizen are sitting next to got good news and bad each other on a long flight. news. The good is, we The lawyer is thinking have money for a new that seniors are so dumb building! The bad news that he could get one is, it’s in your pocket. over on him easily. R.W. So, the lawyer asks if Flatbush the senior would like to play a fun game. Obama’ s New The senior is Tax Plan tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to From now on, the catch a few winks. The lawyer government keeps all paypersists, saying that the game is a checks and sends the working lot of fun: “I ask you a question, and class the CHANGE they asked for! if you don’t know the answer, J.P. you pay me only $5.00. Then Flatbush you ask me one, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay Lakewood you $500.00,” he says. Pirkei Avos This catches the senior’s attention and, to keep the The world stands on lawyer quiet, he agrees to 3 things: SHABBOS GOY play the game. TORAH - the boy has The lawyer asks the first to learn. wo guys have been learning together for question. “What’s the distance AVODA - the girl has 20 years. One of them is making a Bar from the Earth to the moon?” to work. Mitzvah, so he invites his chavrusah. The senior doesn’t say a GIMILUS CHASA“I’m sorry, but I can’t come.” word, but reaches into his DIM - the parents have to “But I really want you to.” pocket, pulls out a five-dollar support them. “You don’t understand. I just can’t come.” bill, and hands it to the N.R. “Why not?” lawyer. Boro Park “I’m not Jewish.” Now, it’s the senior’s “What do you mean? We have been learnturn. He asks the lawyer, Long Life ing together for 20 years!” “What goes up a hill with “I enjoy the intellectual stimulation.” three legs, and comes down A doctor told Sammy “But we learned that a goy who keeps with four?” he had only 6 months to Shabbos is chayav misah (gets the death The lawyer uses his laplive. “How will you spend penalty).” top to search all references he the time?” “I never kept Shabbos. Every time I was can find on the Net. He sends Sammy: “I’ll move in ready to leave my house, I put a key in my emails to all the smart friends with my Shvigger, ‘cuz pocket.” he knows; all to no avail. Afliving with her for 6 “But we have an eruv here.” ter an hour of searching, he fimonths will seem like for“I don’t hold from that eruv.” nally gives up. ever.” He wakes the senior and V.T. hands him $500.00. The senBoro Park comes down with four?” ior pockets the $500.00 and goes Send your true anecdotes, embarrassing moments, bright sayThe senior reaches into his right back to sleep. ings, real life experiences, or any interesting incident relating to pocket, hands the lawyer $5.00, and The lawyer is going nuts not Jewish life in America to: COUNTRY YOSSI MAGAZINE, 1310 48th Street, Brooklyn, New York 11219. All printed submissions goes back to sleep. knowing the answer. He wakes the will receive free tapes or another valuable prize. Winners should senior up and asks, “Well, so what P.H. bring legal I.D. PRIZES WILL NOT BE MAILED goes up a hill with three legs and Boro Park e-mail: country@countryyossi.com

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H U M O R

et me tell you something contrary to popular belief life was a lot “easier” for our parents. Remember when you had to get ready for camp? You packed your stuff a few days before because this huge truck was coming to pick it up. Then you spent one whole day waiting for the truck. You didn’t dare leave home because you were afraid you might miss it. Finally at 7:00 p.m. two young guys would show up, strong like bulls, lift up your trunk on one shoulder and leave in 3 seconds flat. Today it’s a whole different story. To begin with, they don’t come to pick up the luggage anymore. You have to shlep it yourself to the designated bus stop. And who ends up doing all the shlepping? You got it - US MOTHERS! Who started this mishugas? All the husbands wake up in the morning, give the kids a kiss goodbye and leave to work. There I am, left with six kids, six duffel bags and six trunks that weigh 500 tons each! Those that go up to the country and send their kids off from there have the same problem. All the husbands go back to the city and the women do all the shlepping like “ferds!” They even have it worse. First, they have to shlep the luggage to the parking lot (which is usually at the other side of the colony) because the owner doesn’t allow any cars on the grounds (except his own) because you might, G-d forbid, burst a pipe in the ground. So you get your “good friends” to help you shlep the stuff half way across the colony into the car. Of course, the trunk doesn’t close once everything is in, so you shlep everything out again and start rearranging for another half hour. Eventually you find all the luggage fits but there is no room for the kids. Some end up wedging themselves in on top of the duffel bags you threw onto the back seat. The others you tie down to the roof! You arrive at the camp and once

again you have to shlep the stuff into the bunkhouse. I won’t discuss the fact that it’s usually 99 degrees, the shvitz is pouring off you and you find yourself mumbling “endearments” about your husband in the city. Our parents had none of this aggravation! And what about visiting day? Most of our parents didn’t have cars. They rode up to see us on the camp ANOTHER KAYL A CL ASSIC

boys keep the soda cold? Are you ready to “brech?” They store it in the water of the toilet bowl tank! Do you know what would happen to me if I tried that in MY house? Could you imagine entertaining machatunim and telling your son - “Uh, Chaim, could you go get some more soda from the toilet tank!” What about the linen? My mother saved all the “torn” linens and towels for me to take along to camp. Today the kids not only bring along stunning linen - they also bring along matching dust ruffles! The towels are all velour - Who started this mishugas? My sons refuse to take along any linen with flowers, ruffles or anything that may look “girlish.” After wrecking my linen closet, they decided nothing was suitable. Totally disgusted, I told them to “Fahdray Zach Zeir Kup” and told them to sleep in their duffel bags!! Do you remember when going to camp meant just that going to camp! Sometimes, maybe, they took you roller-skating or bowling. Not any more! Now for only $250 extra per child, they take you on a 1 or 2 day overnight excursion to Hershey Park, White Water Rafting, Niagara Falls - Who started this mishugas? And let me let you in on a little secret. All this is nothing compared to the laundry situation! In my days, the camp did your laundry once or twice a trip. If you ran out of stuff, too bad. You either washed it out by hand in the sink or you wore it dirty. So what if you smelled a little - so did everyone else. “Hontigeh Mamas” are mamash meshuga! They actually come to camp to pick up their kids’ laundry, bring it back to the bungalow colony to wash and iron it and bring it back the SAME DAY!! Who started this meshugas?! Yes, my friends, I repeat, life was A LOT easier for our parents, but what I wanna know is - WHO STARTED THIS MESHUGAS?????

K ay l a Kuchle f fe l

WHO STARTED THIS MISHUGAS? provided bus. All the kids sat by the road anxiously awaiting its arrival. When the bus finally did arrive, you spent quality time with your family. If it rained, which 99% of the time it did - everyone shtupped into the bunkhouse and you stayed there until the bus left 5 hours later. Today on visiting day, the baseball field gets turned into a tremendous parking lot. Girls or boys stand with flags and megaphones directing you to a specific spot. Then you have to walk a mile back to the camp. In some camps, there is no one to visit. All the kids leave the grounds. And where do they want to go? To their parents’ bungalow colony (where parents originally wanted them to be for the summer but they just wanted to go to camp), or to the pizza shop or bowling. Who started this mishugas? Did you notice the nosh under the beds? Huge bags of popcorn the size of duffel bags and cases and cases of cans of soda. And do you know how the

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Rabbi Brener… Cont. from Page 60 than other generations who produced individuals who received direct messages from G-d? There is an axiom that teaches that as the separation in time between Har Sinai and the Jewish people increases, generations become less worthy or prominent. Yet, it is a fact that there was never a time in our post-Talmudic History when Torah was learned in every corner of the world. Yeshivot are producing Talmidei Chachamim that can hold their own and surpass in number those of previous generations. We have every reason to be proud and at the same time bear responsibility for producing a better world. We have the “kelim,” the instruments to do so, while at the same time the knowledge that the G-d of our ancestors will never abandon us, and that He will make Himself present after we exhaust all our own efforts. Medinat Israel gives muscle to our battle cry of “Never Again.” It puts teeth into this affirmation, and steadfast Torah study insures the continuous spiritual growth of the Jewish people.

Rabbi Weiss… Cont. from Page 62 Perhaps this is one of the reasons that the Torah defines the location of the teffilin on one’s head as, “L’totafos bein einecha - Frontlets between the eyes.” Of course we know this means that this is on the area of the front of the head that is parallel to between the eyes. Why does the Torah describe the location as between the eyes? Perhaps it is teaching us that when we see with our eyes we should think with our head! As we get in the habit of closing our eyes when saying our brachos and “seeing with the eyes in our head,” we will find that soon it will become second nature for us to consider our options carefully, especially before any important endeavor. In the merit of doing so, may Hashem bless us with long life, good health, and everything wonderful. Sheldon Zeitlin takes dictation of, and edits, Rabbi Weiss’s articles.

Start the new cycle of Mishna Yomis with Rabbi Weiss by dialing 718.906.6471. Or you can listen to his new daily Shiur on Orchos Chaim

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L’harosh by dialing 718.906.6400, then going to selection 4 for Mussar, and then to selection 4. Both are FREE services. Rabbi Weiss is currently stepping up his speaking engagements. To bring him to your community, call now 718.916.3100 or email RMMWSI@ aol.com. To receive a weekly cassette tape or CD directly from Rabbi Weiss, please send a check to Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss, P.O. Box 140726, Staten Island, NY 10314 or contact him at RMMWSI@aol.com. Now back in print is a large size paperback edition of Power Bentching. To order call him at 718-916-3100 or email at above. Attend Rabbi Weiss’ weekly shiur at the Landau Shul, Avenue L and East 9th in Flatbush, Tuesday nights at 9:30 p.m. Rabbi Weiss’ Daf Yomi and Mishnah Yomis shiurim can be heard LIVE on Kol Haloshon at (718) 906-6400. Write to KolHaloshon@gmail.com for details. They can now also be seen on TorahAnyTime.com.

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