CY Family Mag #202 by Country Yossi

APRIL 2016

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APRIL 2016

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APRIL 2016

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Message From the Publisher Hi everybody, As we begin, be”H, our 29th year of publication we take time to reflect on all the wonderful blessings that Hashem has bestowed upon us over the course of 28 tumultuous but memorable years. When we first began publishing in the spring of 1988, we and Good Fortune (remember them?) were the only content-driven, Jewish family magazines out there. One of our key goals was to advance the budding careers and publicize the exciting musical creations of Jewish Music’s new generation of superstars! With our popular Top Ten lists and Personality Spotlights we encouraged many now familiar names to greater heights of creative excellence. Over the years, stellar Jewish Music performers such as Yerachmiel Begun, Eli Gerstner, Lipa Shmeltzer, Dedi, MBD, Avrohom Fried, Yakov Shwekey, Uncle Moishy, The Maccabeats, Shelly Lang, Shloimy Dachs, Shlomo Simcha, Shlomo Carlebach, and a long list of others have graced our front covers. We were there when Jewish Music concerts evolved from the traditional Brooklyn College/Art Raymond MC venue to the hi-tech, state-of-the-art mega events being staged today! In these last 3 decades we have seen the emergence of highly talented, sophisticated frum recording engineers, sound people, musicians, lighting technicians, videographers, producers et al, all supported by a superb list of top-of-theline advertising agencies and graphic artists producing work that equals that pro-

duced by world class Madison Ave agencies! So now, here we are 28 years later with a growing list of slick, glossy, weekly Jewish publications with huge staffs and payrolls on display. And here we are, old reliable, still churning them out the old fashioned way and helping our loyal readers smile while we wait daily for the coming of Moshiach and the fast approaching Geulah Shlaimah! Thank you Hashem and thank you my sponsors and friends for our lifetime together both here and on the radio. It’s been a deeply rewarding and unforgettable experience. L’chaim! Like the 10 pieces of chometz, this half-baked Pesach issue is all over the place! From Uncle Moishy to Senator Felder and beyond we feature more Gebrokts than any other publication guaranteed, or we’ll refund triple your purchase price! We boldly spotlight the unique Chometz Gemach, then switch gears to fret over the looming civil war! Undaunted, we forge ahead with a look at a Nazi’s table and then offer some surprising tips to avoid Alzheimers, lose weight while you sleep and survive sitting in the middle seat on an airplane! What more can you ask for? Enjoy! Wishing you all a Chag Kasher V’sameach, Your friend,

Country Yossi

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ISSUE 202

“New York’s Premier Jewish Magazine”

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“What’s it called when ten Jewish men order steak together? Filet Minyan!” – CY April 2016 /u"ga, ixhb

Table of Contents

Volume 29 Number 1

LET’S SHMOOZE ...................................................................................................................................................................................27 SPOTLIGHT • One Man’s Trash is Another Man’s Chesed, by Binyamin L. Jolkovsky . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36 • Easy-Flow: Litt’e One’s Serenity, Mother’s Best Remedy, by Chaya Sara Schlussel. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40 TIMELINE ................................................................................................................................................................................................46 FELDER FOCUS .....................................................................................................................................................................................47 SOUND OFF • The Looming Civil War, by Joe Good. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 48 • Lost in Cyberspace, by Berel Wein . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50 OPINION

• The Seder is a Mother, by Avi Shafran. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52 • The Price of Exclusion, by Rabbi Jonathan Rosenblum . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54 INSPIRATION • Prophetic Name . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 56 TORAH • Moshe Rabbeinu: A Disruptive Biblical Leader, by Rabino Pynchas Brener. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58 • Chometz! Again? by Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62 • The Short Vort: Bigger and Holy Group, by Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 64 REAL LIFE • The Nazi’s Table, by Robert Sussman. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 68

SPECIAL REPORT • Surviving the Middle Seat, by Country Yossi . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 72 HEALTH AND ADVICE • Dear Bubby . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 76 • Mind Your Words: What You Said is Not What I Heard, by Sheri Toiv, LMHC. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 77 • 8 Ways to Lose Weight While You Sleep . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 78 • Preventing Alzheimer’s by Learning Gemara, by Amanda Bradley . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 80 • 10 Dumb Mistakes that Smart Couples Make: Mistake # 6, by Rabbi Benzion Shafier . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 82 ISRAEL • Pesach: Taking the ‘Miskane’ out of Am Yisroel, by Dov Shurin . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 86

CONTROVERSY • YWN Coffee Room: Mishing on Pesach. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 90 JEWISH BOOKS • Top 10 in Jewish Books . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 93 JEWISH MUSIC • Top 3 in Jewish Music . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 96 • CY Songbook: No Prayer Goes Unanswered . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 99 HUMOR • Pesach Innovation, by Chaptzem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 100 • Can’t You Just Plotz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 103 • Ah Poifect Fit, by Kayla Kuchleffel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 105

COUNTRY YOSSI FAMILY MAGAZINE • 1310 48th Street, Suite 308 • Brooklyn, New York 11219 Telephone: (718) 851-2010 • Email Address: country@countryyossi.com COPYRIGHT © 2016 - Country Yossi Family Magazine, Inc. All rights reserved. Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for unsolicited submissions. Unsolicited manuscripts, photographs, and other submitted materials must be accompanied by a stamped self-addressed envelope. We reserve the right to print all letters in part or in full unless specifically requested otherwise. No articles, photographs, artwork or other material in this magazine may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever, without prior written permission of the publisher. Country Yossi Family Magazine will not be responsible for typographical errors or advertisers’ claims.

Cover Design: R.A. Stone

website: www.countryyossi.com Follow countryyossi on Twitter

Interior Layout: H. Walfish

YESHIVISH Dear Country Yossi, A bochur asks his friend to take his picture standing in front of a yeshiva. When asked why, he replied: “The girl I want to date is looking for a bochur with a yeshiva background.” P.G. Flatbush

this after she got to her first destination. Understandably, she was frantic. She called the central bus station hoping that it would be in a lost-and-found, but of course it wasn’t. She finally decided to call her mother in the States and tell her what happened. When her mother answered, she said “They found your wallet.” The girl was stunned. “How do you know what happened?”

YOM TOV EATING Dear Country Yossi, There’s nothing like our holidays: On Pesach - there is nothing to eat. On Sukkos - there is nowhere to eat. On Rosh Hashana there is no time to eat. On Yom Kippur - we’re not allowed to eat. On Purim - we’re too drunk to eat. On Chanukah - it’s too fattening to eat. On Shavuos - we’re too tired to eat. And when Tu B’Shvat finally comes around, the fruit is all dried up! Chag Sameach B.R. Boro Park

SHARING Dear Country Yossi, Recently a young American girl in seminary in Eretz Yisroel was traveling on a bus. As she got to her stop and disembarked she accidentally left her wallet on the seat next to her. She only realized

opened it. She found the girl’s driver’s license and saw that, “as luck would have it,” the girl was from the same city as her neighbor. This woman’s neighbor was from Chicago. So she went to her neighbor and asked her if she recognized the family name. Again, “as luck would have it,” the neighbor said she not only knew them, she even had their contact information. The woman called them on the spot and they thanked her and told her which seminary the girl was in. The seminary turned out to be around the block from where the woman lived. There is no “as luck would have it.” As has been said time and again, Hashem runs the world. All He wants is that we start the chessed ball rolling. Hashem will continue to roll the ball until the chessed works out. All the woman had to do is pick up the wallet. The rest is anything but luck. L.C. Boro Park

SHOWER CAREFULLY she asked. The following is what actually took place: There was an older woman on the bus who noticed the wallet. She also noticed some Arabs on the bus who were eyeing the wallet. She decided to grab it herself, and when she did, the Arabs protested. She explained to them that it was her friend’s and she planned to return it. The woman then brought the wallet home, and

Dear Country Yossi, This is a warning to us all! I don’t know why I didn’t figure this out sooner! I use shampoo in the shower. When I wash my hair the shampoo runs down my whole body. And printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning: “FOR EXTRA BODY AND VOLUME” No wonder I’ve been gaining weight!

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Well, I’ve gotten rid of that shampoo and I’m going to start showering with Dawn dishwashing soap instead. Its label reads: “DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE.” Problem solved! S.R. Flatbush

MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT Dear Country Yossi, On the morning of my birthday, I told my husband Chaim Yankel, “I just dreamed that you gave me a diamond necklace for my birthday. What do you think it means?” “Maybe you’ll find out tonight,” he said, smiling. That evening, my Chaim Yankel came home with a small package and gave it to me. Breathlessly, I ripped off the wrapping paper and inside I found a book, titled “The Meaning of Dreams.” Chaim Yankel’s swelling is starting to go down and the doctor said hopefully he soon will be able to stop sipping his meals through a straw! N.N. Received via email

A TEXT FROM TATTY Dear Country Yossi, I was late getting into the cellphone culture. In fact, I wrote two letters that were published in your magazine listing the dangers of cellphones. I tried to stick to my rules, but eventually I caved. One benefit of the cellphone that I enjoy is texting. It has brought back, to a small extent, the letter writing we once did to family and friends. A letter was always more personal than a phone call, it took more effort and thought. We were able to touch people on a deeper level and its influence was enormous. Take a Shana Tova card, for example. In it you can express what you are thankful for about the recipient from years past. Or take a consolation card. I remember when we were sitting shiva for my father a’h and an

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old friend sent a letter about his memories. Through the tears, we read and reread that letter. We had much nechama from it. So too it is with all letters and cards. Even birthday cards, if we enclose a few personal words, go a long way toward bonding us. This, I think, can be reproduced with today’s texting. We have the power to make others think, smile, laugh, wonder, consider, learn, be uplifted, take action, etc. When I text my kids I take my time. I think about what to write, how it will be taken, how I can say the most in the fewest number of characters. A phone call needs spontaneity, but with texting you become the author of messages specifically to the recipient. Be careful what you write. I.R. Flatbush

THE MEANING OF DREAMS Dear Country Yossi, Iranian Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei calls Trump and tells him, “Donald, stay out of the race for President, because last night I had a fantastic dream. I could see America, the whole beautiful country, and on each house I saw a banner.” “What did it say on the banners?” Trump asks. Khamenei replies, “UNITED STATES OF IRAN.” Trump says, “You know, Ali, I am really happy you called, because believe it or not, last night I had a similar dream. I could see all of Tehran. The city was more beautiful than ever and on each house flew an enormous banner.” “What did it say on the banners?” Ali asked. Trump replies, “I don’t know. I can’t read Hebrew.” H.T. Crown Heights

NEXT TO A WOMAN Dear Country Yossi, I sat next to a Chasidic man on a flight, and this happened. Since an earlier flight to LGA was delayed, a lot of people switched to our flight at the last

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minute, including a woman who was separated from her little child. So she timidly asked him to switch seats, saying “I know it might be against your religious beliefs to sit next to a woman.” He responded, “It’s against my religion to keep you apart from your child on a flight. Sitting next to a woman is fine!” He then proceeded to help her put her huge bag in the overhead compartment. There’s hope for humanity! Received via email

EYERONIC Dear Country Yossi, Eyelashes are supposed to prevent things from getting into your eyes, but when I do have something in my eye, it’s always an eyelash! I.C. Boro Park

ADDRESSING THE LETTERS Dear Country Yossi, There are two letters from the

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December 2015 issue that I would like to comment on. In a letter titled “The Test” the writer described how he/she witnessed a woman who was shopping and obviously had little money to complete her purchases. The writer stepped in to offer her $100. I congratulate him/her immensely for doing that. The same has happened to me many times, when I came to the register and realized that I could not buy everything for a lack of funds and I needed to put things back on the shelf. I would look around and see if there were people I could borrow from, and often there would be people I knew, but I wouldn’t have the courage to ask them. So when you see a frum person with a shopping cart returning items to the shelf it should be clear that he/she needs your intervention. If you can afford it, ask if you can lend the money they need with the intention to turn that loan into a gift, because he/she most likely cannot add more debts to those they already have. You will have done a great mitzvah. The next letter I would like to address is “A German View on Islam.” The writer shows how throughout history the few extremists have caused havoc and bloodshed while ruling the silent majority as they run across continents. The Nazis, the Communists, and now the Moslems. His facts are true but I didn’t get the message. What is this writer exactly telling us we need to do? Are we supposed to arm ourselves and face these fanatics or are we supposed to force our governments to do so? Being aware of the situation is good but what is the point? What are we to do? According to our gedolim, we should be improving our davening, doing teshuva, giving more tzedakah, and in that way we will win over the extremists of every generation. H.B. Crown Heights

FEEDBACK Dear Country Yossi, I would like to present my feedback on three of the articles that

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were printed in your Chanukah issue (Dec. 2015). I never realized the importance of holding on to difficult relationships, as explained by Sheri Toiv. One example of this is a divorced spouse. We must keep that relationship positive, for the benefit of the kids. New spouses must understand that the connection with the old spouse, though limited, is essential and this must be discussed when dating. Another example is a friend who you like for their company but some things about them cause you both to part ways and then reunite months later. Mrs. Toiv explains how not to let this happen by defining boundaries, thereby avoiding the trouble spots in the relationship. This same idea can also improve our relationship with Hashem. When we become cognizant of the things that separate us from Hashem, we can plan to eliminate those barriers. I really like Dov Shurin’s articles. He always comes up with great chiddushim. I am sure he makes his grandfather z’l and uncle Rabbi Avrohom Kamenetzky z’l very proud. When, on occasion, I would daven at the 7:30 shachris minyan at Rabbi Landau’s shul, it was a privilege joining R’ Avrohom at his table. He had a warm smile and a kind word for all. We miss him dearly. If there is one thing we can take from these special people it would be to impart our warmth to the next generation. It will go a long way in making people feel good and inspired. Another thing about Dov Shurin is his great music. If I had money I would bring his band to the US to tour the country. His ahavas Yisroel and emunas Hashem come through in each song. May he continue to play and sing for many years to come. Lastly, I disagree with Heshy Walfish’s assessment about Obama. He was hand-picked by Hashem to become president so that Jews would stop feeling that their security comes from America. Obama is setting the stage for Moshiach. Start packing. L.B. Flatbush

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S P O T L I G H T

One Man’s Trash is anOTher Man’s Chesed By BinyaMin L. JOLkOvsky IT’S THE DAY AFTER PESACH. The Chassidishe “yungerman,” with several kids - all under the age of eight - in tow, makes his way to a garage located on the outskirts of Boro Park. The children believe they’re on an outing. The father knows better it’s anything but. He’s secured an appointment. Unlike the many recent others, this one he’s actually looking forward to. He’s at ease, knowing friends or neighbors won’t spot him or mind his business. As they walk, the father, in his 30s, expresses his gratitude to Yitzchak Relkin, the founder of The Chametz Gemach. But not before expressing his relief. “Pesach,” he starts, “is wonderful but financially draining. The community helps us ‘make yom tov.’ Then the expenses start again.” As the yungerman begins to select the food he will eventually take home - staples that will come to good use - Mr. Relkin is asked by a reporter to describe the genesis of his undertaking. In a community of kindness, his organization is certainly among one of Brooklyn’s most unusual expressions of chesed. Yitzchak Relkin could be called an accidental visionary. Like many who toil uncompensated Down Here, he didn’t decide one fine day to think up an idea that would be copied and adapted in several communities nationwide, with more added every year. He saw a problem and created a solution that many people - almost all of them strangers - are grateful for.

t was six years ago - on “garbage day” - that Yitzchak Relkin stumbled upon a scene that left him troubled. As he made his way to work, a disgruntled garbage man was calling out to his co-worker. He nearly bumped into him. “What’s up with all the food the Jews are throwing away? Good food, too!” he yelled over the din of the truck, complaining about the increase of refuse he was being forced to haul. Even spoken out of frustration, it was still a good question. One that Mr. Relkin had actually wondered about. Consciously or not, this gentile was sensitive to the very Jewish notion of “ba’al tashchis.” Nothing in life is coincidental. Mr. Relkin took his message - or was it His message? - to heart. There are “gemachim” for all sorts of needs. Why not a “ba’al tashchis” prevention one - a “chametz gemach?” That year, The Chametz Gemach was born. It started with two families that Yitz Relkin personally knew. He enjoyed their hospitality as a steady - and still unmarried - Shabbos guest. But the families would never accept anything in return. This time was different. “Instead of being the recipient of a mitzvah, folks - both those who give as well as those who accept - can honestly say they are helping to fulfill a mitzvah by preventing waste,” Mr. Relkin explains. “That’s not just a rationalization. It’s the truth.” To date, Mr. Relkin has single-handedly distributed ten thousand pounds of food. That’s 5 tons. This year he’s hoping to make it six. Continued on Page 107

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S P O T L I G H T

EASY-FLOW: LITTLE ONE’S SERENITY, MOTHER’S BEST REMEDY BY CHAYA SARA SCHLUSSEL

t’s 2:20am. Two weeks ago at this time, I was pacing the floor of my living room, wearing my rug threadbare as I trudged back and forth with my eyes drooping in sleep-deprivation. In my arms was my chronically screaming infant daughter. I patted her, sang to her and begged her to calm down. She just continued howling. It was almost 4am by the time we both finally succumbed to an exhausted sleep. That was the routine I had been blindly following for more than two months, despairing of ever finding rest, and giving up on the hope of a happy, content baby. I lovingly nursed her, but it was a monumental sacrifice for me, rather than a relaxing exchange between mother and child. I was never sure if she had eaten enough, as she never seemed satisfied. Both my daughter and I were miserable - which is why I will be forever grateful to the friend who finally introduced me to an incredible product called Easy-Flow. I’m sure my story will sound familiar to many. After my first 2-week stint of insomnia, I seriously contemplated switching from nursing to formula. It just wasn’t working out, and I was ready to quit. But once I learned about the many benefits of mother’s milk, bottle feeding became a far less optimal option for me. Aside from the incomparable bonding experience it creates, breastfeeding stimulates the immune system, protecting against invasive diseases, viruses and cancers - even lowering the risk of Leukemia by 30%. Additionally, nursing has been scientifically proven as an IQ-booster, providing proper nourishment for the brain in its earliest stages. It prevents obesity and eating disorders later on in the baby’s life and significantly lowers baby’s risk of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). With all its natural benefits, nursing was inarguably the superior feeding alternative. So instead of jumping ship,

I set out to find a way, if at all possible, to continue nursing without the crankiness. I began asking people for advice and soon found that many women shared similar circumstances to mine. Some complained about colic and gassiness in their infants. Others sighed over nursing-induced irritation and soreness. Many were despairing of ever enjoying their “bonding experience.” And then finally, I met my friend Mimi at the park. I casually mentioned that my nursing was not all I had hoped it would be. She nodded knowingly, and then whipped a bottle of Easy-Flow out of her pocketbook. “Easy-Flow,” she confidently asserted, “will change your life. Trust me. Just try it.” I began taking Easy-Flow twice a day, and I’ve never looked back since. During my 2-month quest for answers, I learned many things about nursing that I’d previously been unaware of. I learned that some women have a low milk supply, which results in an unsatisfied, unhappy baby. Other women have plentiful milk, but still fail to satiate their baby’s hunger due to poor milk consistency, diluted quality, bitter taste or lack of nutrients. In some cases, mother’s milk cannot travel properly for lack of conduit fluency - and the frustrated baby cannot get enough. At times, superficial sores and skin conditions can cause severe discomfort to the mother both during and after nursing sessions. Amazingly, the one natural, centuriesold antidote for all of these complications is Easy-Flow. This prize product from Smiling Herbs both enhances and enriches mother’s milk to its greatest advantage. It’s a healthy supplement that provides instantaneous, positive results in many areas of difficulty. Easy-Flow aids smooth movement of the milk by ensuring consistency and conduit clearance. It eliminates irritation by targeting internal infection. It in-

creases baby’s appetite, making nursing sessions longer and more productive. Vital minerals and nutrients give both mother and baby a healthy boost, as mom’s immune system is strengthened and resistance to infection and disease is fortified. One mother confided that she only began using Easy-Flow after twelve months of nursing, when her milk supply gradually began to decrease. Easy-Flow reversed the decline. With absolutely no side effects, Easy-Flow does not cause any reactions, allergic or otherwise. And best of all, EasyFlow has a soothing effect on babies, targeting pressure points and eliminating headaches, upset stomachs, colic, gassiness, and other causes of stress or interference. It’s a favorite of mothers worldwide, who cannot help but rave about the incredible transformation that Easy-Flow has brought to their nursing sessions. Recently, this standard herbal supplement was redesigned to contain a high-potency extract that is easy to take, with revolutionary results. The Smiling Herbs Company saw the tremendous need for a product that would aid mothers significantly in their nursing. Using a precise processing system overseen by a highly trained staff of field experts with extensive knowledge of herbal history, Smiling Herbs reintroduced Easy-Flow to their exuberant customer base. The all-natural ingredients are hand-selected for their physical and chemical potential. Now small, easy-to-swallow capsules provide instant relief in manageable dosages. While every mother needs to regulate her own dosage, most people see a definite improvement with just two capsules a day. The feedback that Easy-Flow has received is overwhelmingly positive from their many satisfied clients. Now it’s 2:25am and the only reason I’m still up is that I had to finish writing this article, letting all the feeding-forlorn mothers out there know about this unparalleled product, so they too can upgrade their nursing from bleary-eyed to beautiful. Mommies, don’t quit. Take Easy-Flow and get to enjoy the beauty, bounty, and blessing of your baby. Thank you, Smiling Herbs, for the miracle of quiet and contentment that you’ve given me. Good night! Smiling Herbs 347-546-2792 smilingherbs@gmail.com

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• Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

T I M E L I N E

• If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? • When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?

AN ECLECT IC COL LECTION OF NEWS ITEMS, FEATURES AND HUMOR WE JUST COULDN’T FIT ANYWHERE ELSE!

• If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed? • Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's?"

A STRANGE LANGUAGE

• If people from Poland are called "Poles," why aren't people from Holland called "Holes?"

• If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

• Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites? • Why do overlook and

oversee mean opposite things? • If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible? • Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?

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• "I am." is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I Do." is the longest sentence? • Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

SENATOR FELDER HIGHLIGHTS PESACH SANITATION PICKUPS/ CHOMETZ BURNING SCHEDULE

enator Simcha Felder is happy to inform the community that there will be additional sanitation pickups in his district.

IN FLATBUSH (COMMUNITY BOARD 14)

The entire district will also receive a regular garbage pickup on Friday morning, April 22nd, from 6:00 am until 2:00 pm.

IN ALL AREAS: Mattresses and box springs must be completely wrapped (use bed-bug

For areas with regular pickups on Mondays/Thursdays, there is an additional collection on Friday, April 22nd. For areas with regular pickups on Tuesdays/Fridays or Wednesdays/Saturdays, there is an additional collection on Thursday, April 21st. For all residents, there will be an additional Friday recycling collection from 12 midnight to 8:00 am. All recycling materials must be placed at curbside on the evening of Thursday, April 21st for collection on Friday, April 22nd. All regular refuse materials, including chometz, should be placed at curbside no later than 11:00 am on Friday, April 22nd.

CHOMETZ BURNING SCHEDULE FOR FRIDAY, APRIL 22, 2016 All chometz burning must be completed by 11:34 am. The Fire Department will strictly enforce this curfew. Please burn only chometz. Do not burn flammable or combustible items or chometz enclosed in foil wrap. Do not use paint thinners, aerosol cans, sprays, lighter fluid or any flammable liquids to ignite the fire. These items have caused serious accidents in the past. Only official fires with permits will be allowed. For information on fire locations, contact: Shomrim of Boro Park (718) 831-7080

IN BORO PARK (COMMUNITY BOARD 12) Sanitation is now picking up bulk items and will continue to do so until Friday, April 22nd. Items should be placed out for collection as early as possible. Cardboard boxes should be tied up and placed outside neatly. The entire district will receive a recycling pickup on Thursday night, April 21st, into Friday morning, starting at midnight until 8:00 am.

the local garage on 19th Avenue and 56th Street. Department of Sanitation policy requires a special appointment for removal of discarded refrigerators and/or air conditioners. Arrangements can be made by calling 311 prior to the week of April 18th to ensure pickup before Pesach.

Shomrim of Flatbush (718) 338-9453 Chaveirim (718) 431-8181 bag or plastic). If a mattress or box spring is unwrapped, Sanitation will not collect it and you may be fined $100. Electronic items will not be picked up by the Sanitation Department and you may be fined $100. Electronic items should be brought to

Community Board 12 (718) 851-0800 Community Board 14 (718) 859-6357 Best wishes for a kosher and freilichen Pesach! Simcha

APRIL 2016

SOUND OFF

THE LOOMING CIVIL WAR BY JOE GOOD

ndoubtedly, the historic and social ingredients that gave rise to the Trump phenomenon will be studied by social historians and scholars for decades to come.

But a few things are already obvious: The vile and violent nature of the popular anti-establishment revolt, the raw emotionalism of the message, shorn of its garb of civility and decency, the social schism and fundamental breakdown of all societal norms

does not bode well for the future of our republic! The founding fathers feared just such a scenario. And while they warned of such an eventuality, unfortunately our current political system is ill-equipped to handle it. Indeed, our increasingly polarized two party system, frozen in impotence, unable to legislate and unwilling to perform their constitutionally proscribed duties has set the stage for what I fear will be a violent realignment of political forces. There may very well be riots; not the limited, focused ones Trump has predicted but rather a widespread, bloody unrest inspired by disillusionment with the current system and stoked by a rabid, jingoistic new nationalism that will threaten to tear the nation asunder! The divide between right and left has never been more pronounced. The reasonable centrist compromises of the past have been replaced by ever-increasing implacability and a macho unwillingness to compromise, resulting in government shutdowns. The differences between Republicans and Democrats have become more pronounced and toxic - the discourse more shrill! The dumbing down of the American electorate, for whatever reason, has engendered an atmosphere of suspicion, disappointment and rage, allowing a candidate with no clear plan of action, no cogent program, no specific remedy for the ills of the nation to rise to national prominence with vacuous but fiery rhetoric as his only solution! Should Trump be the Republican nominee I fear events will inexorably unfold that will result in a democratic sweep of the presidency as well as both houses of Congress! Following shortly thereafter, the amnesty of millions of illegal aliens who will be granted the right to vote and continued loose border controls will contribute to a situation where, by dint of sheer numbers alone, the geo-political landscape will be forever altered - a permanent majority of Democratic voters will assure one party rule for the foreseeable future. Half the country will be disenfranchised and frustrated, leading to violent demonstrations! Looking down the road to the not-toodistant future I see riots and violence that will make the Civil War seem like childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s play! Talk of Red state secession from the union will threaten our republic and the permanent political division of the country into 2 ideologically opposed entities will follow! Am I overreacting? Perhaps, but I fear not by much!

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APRIL 2016

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SOUND OFF

LOST

CYBERSPACE BY BEREL WEIN

o help me with my weakening eyesight, I purchased an iPad last week. After having my resident expert set the gadget up with the necessary applications, I began to enjoy this new wonder of our age. One of the applications installed on my iPad is Microsoft Word. I like the keyboard of the iPad as I find it easier to see the letters than on my regular computer keyboard. So I wrote my usual brilliant op-ed article for this week on my new iPad. Somehow, in spite of all of my efforts and technological genius, this finely crafted essay just simply... disappeared. Numerous experts on iPads and their uses attempted to help me find and restore the lost article. But it has all been to no avail. Somewhere in cyberspace, a great article (about taxation) is floating around, inaccessible to all concerned. I wonder, where is it? Is it still in existence? Or perhaps it has disappeared forever, making no impression, of no value, as though it never was. My frustration at losing an essay that I had worked on for some time was great and I think understandable. But as I reconciled myself to its loss and steeled myself to the task of writing another essay, my rabbinic bent of mind started to kick in. I, for one, always attempt to see if there is a deeper message hidden in apparently mundane and everyday occurrences. And so, I began to ruminate about my essay floating somewhere in the heavens of cyberspace. I thought to myself that this is perhaps what happens to many of our prayers. I am not certain that all of them reach their intended goal or are even recognized by Heaven. Since we are not always at the top of our games as far as daily prayers are concerned, it can very well be that many of them are just simply floating around in the ether of the universe, of little help or consequence. It could also be this is too pessimistic a viewpoint of the matter. After all, what do I know about Heaven and how it operates? In Kabbalistic thought, one finds all sorts of ref-

erences and images of ill-formed angels that have been created by improper thoughts, actions and lack of concentration while reciting prayers. Perhaps many of our prayers seemingly go unanswered and somehow get â&#x20AC;&#x153;lostâ&#x20AC;? in transmission because of our lack of concentration when those words of prayer are first uttered. If this be the case, then there must be an awful lot of clutter in the unseen space before the gates of prayer. The rabbis have taught us that even if we are unsuccessful in entering those gates of prayer with our words, nevertheless our emotions and tears, which come from the heart and not just the eyes, will always arrive and be counted. One of the great liturgical poems creates for us the image of our tears being stored in a Heavenly container that is eternal and of constant merit. Losing our prayers in cyberspace is far more frustrating and sad than losing an article about taxation. Prayer is hard work and the fact that it is a thrice-daily activity makes it susceptible to the dangers of rote and habit. This is so true that in Chasidic and Kabbalistic thought, one of the tasks and abilities of the righteous, holy person, is the ability to somehow gather all of those lost prayers and to raise them, by his power of prayer, to enter the holy gates and become meaningful and effective. Due to this type of thinking and worldview, prayer in the Chasidic world took on a role equal to and - according to its more radical wing - an even greater one than Torah study. In the famous quip popularized in the Lithuanian yeshiva movement, prayer is when we speak to G-d and Torah study is when G-d speaks to us. Be that as it may, it is obvious that prayer is compared to archery, where the arrow must be well directed in order for it to reach its target. But, even the greatest archer sometimes misses. So too, at times our prayers require a greater sense of concentration than we accord them. Let us hope that, unlike my iPad essay on taxation, our prayers will not be eternally lost and will be able to enter the Heavenly gates.

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APRIL 2016

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O P I N I O N

THE SEDER IS A MOTHER BY AVI SHAFRAN

n a traditional nuclear Jewish family, there’s no denying that the father is the apparent authority figure. To be sure, it’s often, if not always, the case that the mother’s will and wisdom are what persevere. But, at least concerning appearances, it’s Dad who’s the “boss.” And perhaps never as obviously as at a traditional Seder, when the male parent leads the proceedings, and his wife is, all too often and lamentably, barely awake as the result of her preSeder labors. Might we suspend, just for the moment, our righteous indignation over that admittedly sexist narrative? There will be plenty of time later for howling and putting kumquats or whatever on the Seder plate. Let’s focus here, rather, on something intriguing about the role of the father as Seder leader: He’s acting as a mother. How so? Consider: The Seder is not a Talmud lesson, or even a Bible studies class. Some Torah verses are cited, but the role the Seder leader plays on Passover night, vis-à -vis the younger Jews - who, the Talmud tells us are the focuses of the night - is a very specific one. We are teachers, to be sure, but it is not so much information that we are imparting; it is identity. At the Seder, in other words, we seek to instill in our children and grandchildren the realization that they are not mere independent individuals but rather parts of a people, members of a nation geographically unconstrained but fused by history and destiny. We impress on them the fact that they are links in a human chain stretching back to the birth of the Jewish nation, back to the time when

our people were divinely redeemed from mundane slavery in Egypt and entered a sublime servitude of a very different sort - to G-d - at Sinai. That’s an immeasurably important mission, and likely a large part of the reason that so many Jewish parents who are alienated from virtually every other Jewish observance still feel compelled, often without realizing why, to have at least some sort of Seder. On Passover, as we celebrate the birth of the Jewish nation and plant the seed of Jewish identity in the minds of smaller Jews, we are in effect birthing the Jewish future. And so, while the father may be presiding over the proceedings, he is acting not as an instructor but in a decidedly maternal role, as a spiritual nurturer of the children present. Indeed, in Jewish religious law, or Halacha, Jewish identity is in fact dependent on mothers. While a Jew’s tribal connection - say, whether he is a Kohein or she a Kohenes - follows the paternal line, whether a child is a member of the Jewish people in the first place or not, depends entirely on the status of the mother. That technical maternal determination of identity reflects a sociological reality: Mothers are the parents who instill the most fundamental identity awareness in their children. All of which may be the key to one of the Haggadah’s many mysteries. Despite the late hour and exhaustion (not to mention four cups of wine), many a Jewish mind has wondered during a Passover Seder about all the book’s “fours.” Four questions, four sons, four expressions of redemption, those four cups. The author, or authors, of the Haggadah (whose basic structure is delin-

eated by the Mishna but was enhanced with other material over ensuing centuries) employed an array of pedagogical methods, including songs, riddles and puzzles, as means of subtly conveying deeper ideas to the children at the center of the night (and to the adults, too). And they left us some clues to the puzzles. One, hinting perhaps to the deeper meaning of the recurrent fours, may lie in the number-decoder that, as it happens, is built right into the text, toward its very end, where most good books’ keys and indexes are found. We’re a little buzzed and a lot tired once it’s reached, but the hint is unmistakably there, in “Echad Mi Yodea,” or “Who Knows One?” - a song that provides Jewish associations with numbers. “Who knows four?” the song asks. If you don’t remember the answer, well, why don’t you look it up? Rabbi Avi Shafran has served as Agudath Israel of America’s director of public affairs since 1994, and also blogs at his own site. He received ordination from Rav Yaakov Yitzchok Ruderman, the founding Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshivas Ner Yisrael in Baltimore, and was a student of Rav Ruderman’s son-in-law Rav Yaakov Weinberg, who followed his father-inlaw as Rosh Yeshiva. Rabbi Shafran served as a high school rebbe for close to twenty years before assuming his current position, writes widely in the Jewish and general press and is the author of several books, including “Migrant Soul: The Story of an American Ger” (Targum/Feldheim) and, most recently “It’s All in the Angle” (Torah Temimah Publications/Judaica Press), a collection of selected essays.

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APRIL 2016

O P I N I O N

THE PRICE OF EXCLUSION BY RABBI JONATHAN ROSENBLUM

n acquaintance accosted me recently. “Whatever happened to ahavas Yisrael?” he wanted to know. While I sometimes doff my defender-of-the-faithful hat at the gym, I assumed he was talking about Emmanuel and dutifully trotted out all my proofs that no ethnic discrimination was involved. Though Emmanuel was as I had guessed - the impetus for his question, the issue he raised was far larger than Emmanuel. “When I grew up in Detroit,” Max told me, “there were barely enough kids from Shomer Shabbos families to support one day school. We all went to school together. I remember Rabbi Avrohom Abba Freedman, a devoted disciple of Reb Shraga Feivel Mendlowitz, going from bed to bed in hospitals, asking people if they were Jewish. If they were, he would beg them to send their children to Bais Yehudah. Many important talmidei chachamim from that era came from non-shomer Shabbos homes.” As the frum community has grown, schools have become more and more selective. The emphasis today is on refining the criteria for exclusion, not bringing in as many Jewish children as possible. Rav Aharon Leib Steinman has quipped that Avrohom Avinu would not be accepted in our schools today because of his father, but Yishmael and Esav would be. Much has changed from the ‘40s and ‘50s. The average non-frum student of those days was more innocent than many students from Orthodox homes today. Schools can no longer simply employ an open-door policy. Internet and handheld devices are game-changers. One child with internet access can corrupt an entire class. (Nor is it always in the best interests of children of recent ba’alei teshuva or from weaker backgrounds to be integrated immediately with children from veteran religious families. In such circumstances, the recent ba’alei teshuva will often feel like second-class citizens, just

because they are lacking so many basics their peers have absorbed at home.) But our emphasis on tiny differences goes far beyond protecting our children against the ravages of internet. In both the United States and Israel, many schools look askance at any child whose father is not learning in kollel. Even children of English-speaking kolleleit are persona non grata in some Israeli schools. In a famous clip, a school principal boasts to Rav Steinman that the school employs someone with a special talent for ferreting out those who lack the proper signon (style). Rav Steinman replies that what the principal calls signon is only ga’avah (conceit). Community-wide schools for children from a variety of backgrounds have largely gone the way of the dodo bird - at least apart from smaller communities. Some of the reasons are valid; others less so: Like everything connected to chinuch, matters are complicated and the dividing lines thin. But we should at least have our eyes open about what has been lost. Idealism is the first casualty. In former times, children from stronger backgrounds were eager to be a positive influence on the children from weaker backgrounds. They consciously viewed themselves as mashpi’im (sources of influence), and that, in turn, strengthened their own religious identity. I have been told by the daughters of highly respected rabbis in communities where a more “right-wing” Bais Yaakov opened up that they would not want to go to the new school precisely because they would miss the opportunity to be a positive influence. (The potential benefits for religious identity of defining oneself in juxtaposition to the surroundings is still found today in many children of rabbis in smaller American communities and among Israeli children who grow up in more mixed communities.) The most common justification for ever more stringent entrance requirements to our educational institutions is the need to protect our children. Certain-

ly no responsible Jewish parent would knowingly expose their child to a host of negative influences. We do not wantonly subject ourselves to tests in order to strengthen ourselves. But it is possible to cripple our children by sheltering them to such a degree that when they are exposed to challenges as adults they will have developed no tools for dealing with those challenges. Healthy bodies develop immunities through controlled exposure to viruses, and there is a spiritual parallel. Not everyone we meet in life will be pre-selected to think exactly like us, and a school where everyone is so selected risks producing vulnerable products. Part of a Torah chinuch is providing our children with the tools that they will need to confront challenges. Parents of girls from Israeli kollel families living in the utmost simplicity and intent on preparing their daughters for such a life rightly fear that exposure to other girls living at a much higher standard might cause discontent among some of their daughters. But income differentials have been a fact of life since time immemorial. Better for the school to mitigate the challenges by developing parietal rules - e.g., putting strict limits on what can be served at a birthday party and/or limiting birthday parties to school. But ultimately there is no escape from the necessity of developing in our children a deep appreciation of Chazal’s definition of “who is happy.” Another defense of schools limited to students from one Chassidic group or who meet a long checklist of criteria is the desire to transmit a particular mesorah. The challenge, however, is finding ways to instill pride in one’s own traditions, without becoming contemptuous of everyone else’s. Such contempt is a natural by-product, however, when the mesorah can only be transmitted by excluding everyone with a slightly different one. Homogeneity can also cause the atrophying of a Klal Yisrael consciousness. The less we are exposed to Jews who are different from us, the less aware we become of their existence. And the less aware we are of Jews outside of our narrow circle, the greater the chance that we will not take them into account when making decisions about our conduct.

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Inspiration Prophetic Name

Is giving your baby a name a “small prophecy?” Read this timely story…

e just passed the yahrtzeit of Reb Elimelech of Lizhensk, who passed away on the 21st day of Adar in the year 5547 (1787). Reb Elimelech was a prominent student of the Maggid, Rebbe Dov Ber of Mezeritch, and was brought under his tutelage by his illustrious brother the famous Tzadik and Rebbe, Reb Meshulam Zushya of Anipoli. Reb Elimelech is most commonly known by the name of his popular sefer ‘Noam Elimelech,’ a commentary on the Torah. This book is one of the principal works of Chassidus. Each year, for his yahrzeit, close to 35,000 people travel to the remote corner of Poland where he is buried. It is said that anyone who prays at his grave on the day of his yahrzeit will not leave this world without being given a chance of achieving complete repentance. One of the travel agents arranging the pilgrimage for Reb Elimelech’s yahrzeit to Poland, once recommended to a friend of his - who for many years after his marriage was still childless - that he take the trip with him to Lizhensk. He said to his friend (a non-religious Jew) that the day of Reb Elimelech’s yahrzeit is a very auspicious day, and to pray on this very day at the grave site of this holy man will bring him the blessing he so desperately needs. His friend politely declined. “I will pay for the entire trip,” said the travel agent, “all expenses are on me. Please come, I guarantee you won’t regret the trip.” After just minutes of persuasion he finally convinced his friend to come along with him. However, he made two conditions. “First, you must name the baby Elimelech (if it is a boy),

and second, you must give me the honor of being the Sandek at the bris.” His friend agreed to both conditions and off to Lizhensk they went. About a year passed and this friend called to say that his wife gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, and he was calling to tell him the good news. The travel agent reminded him about the two conditions he had committed to before the trip to Lizhensk, but his friend told him that although he would fully oblige to the second condition and gladly give him the honor of being Sandek, he did, however, have an issue with the first. Being non-religious, his wife was strongly opposing the name Elimelech. She said it was an old fashioned name and she wanted to give her kid a more modernized name. The travel agent, disappointed with his friend, fought back and pressed that all commitments be met. After a week of argument, persuasion and convincing, the new parents finally agreed to give the name Elimelech, but with the condition that it would be the baby’s subordinate name. The baby’s first name would be the name of their choice, and they would call him by his first name as he grew to adulthood. On the eighth day Mr. Travel Agent got the honor of being the Sandek, and when the baby’s name was announced he froze in shock. The modernized name the couple was so passionate to give the baby was - “Noam.” The baby’s full name was given as “Noam Elimelech.” Without knowing why, the new parents chose the name of Reb Elimelech of Lizhensk’s most popular sefer, the “Noam Elimelech.”

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T O R A H Pynchas Brener is the Ashkenazi Chief Rabbi of Caracas, Venezuela, since 1967. He received his Bachelor of Arts and Rabbinic Ordination from Yeshiva University and his Master’s degree from Columbia University, and is a PhD honoris causa of Bar Ilan University. He has an internet project and a website: www.pynchasbrener.com.

MOSHE RABBEINU: A DISRUPTIVE BIBLICAL LEADER

ow can one opt for leadership? One way to do it is by offering solutions to the collective’s problems. Moshe Rabbeinu could have risen to a role of leadership by alleviating the suffering of our ancestors in Egypt. We cannot forget the reality of those times: “Avadim hayinu leFar’oh beMitzrayim.” We were enslaved and under torment, and surely would have appreciated any kindness that could make a terrible situation more tolerable. Moshe Rabbeinu could have declared: “We are going to do away with 14-hour-days of toil.” “We will demand to work only 10 or 11 hours daily.” He could have argued that it would benefit the Hebrews as well as the Egyptians. No one can produce effectively in such a long and strenuous work day. In fewer hours, he could have pointed out, the Hebrews will become more efficient and that would benefit their taskmasters. “If we must go out to look for straw to elaborate the bricks, there will be fewer hours of production and the proposed structures will not be finished on time,” he would further argue. The above could have been a basic political platform for Moshe. He was thereby addressing the angst of the people. His suggestions would permit

more time to cement family ties, let fathers bond with sons. He would have been acclaimed by all had he succeeded with these petitions before the Pharaoh. Moshe, however, chose a different path. He did not argue for a lighter work load and for more materials of construction. He was a disrupter. He just said: “Let’s get out of here;” better framed in the familiar “Let my people go.” Moshe Rabbeinu challenged the absolute authority of a Pharaoh or anyone else. No human being had a right to impose a yoke upon someone else, he preached. No people could become the master or overlord of another people. All humans are created in the image of G-d. We are all equally free. We are all endowed with dignity. As soon as our ancestors left Egypt they were faced with the waters of the Red Sea on one side and on the other side, the war chariots of the Egyptians in full pursuit to take them back. Pharaoh had previously argued: “Vehaya ki tikrena milchamah,” in case of war, they may join our enemies and ascend from the land in escape. Obviously, the Egyptians were not ready to do without the cheap labor, the slave labor provided by the Hebrews that actually was not cheap, it was for free. However, in a moment of

anger and pain, seeing his own firstborn killed, the pharaoh felt he had enough and literally expelled the Hebrews from the land. On the morrow, after a sobering reflection, the Egyptian ruler realized he erred. In fact, he had made a stupid economic decision. He rescinded from his former edict and led his chariots in hot pursuit of his Hebrew slaves. But G-d thought otherwise. He parted the waters of the Red Sea, permitted the Hebrews to escape while drowning the Egyptians who were following behind, thinking that the miracle included them as well. The Hebrews came to Mara, where they found the waters to be bitter. Another miracle was performed for them and the waters sweetened, making them drinkable. “Sham sam lo chok umishpat” - there, in Mara, laws and judgments were placed before them. Our rabbis speculate as to the nature of these laws and judgments. Their answer is that the Hebrews were instructed about Shabbat, social laws and the ritual of the Red Heifer, the Para Adumah. The previous were a set of disruptive instructions. Through Shabbat they were taught that it is not a question whether the amount of daily hours for labor was fair or just, leaving time to be spent with family and friends. The Hebrews were told that there is an inherent right applicable to all, including servants. Humans and animals had a right to rest one day a week, without having to perform any tasks. Not only is this a right, it is an obligation. We thereby give testimony that G-d created the world, because even the Almighty rested the seventh day of Creation, thereby teaching humanity a basic truth. Work is important. Man was placed in Gan Eden “leovda uleshomra” - to work and guard the Garden of Eden. Yet, man is also a spiritual being who has to rise above the rest of creation. Man needs a day to evaluate the road he travels and his accomplishments and failures. He needs to reflect upon this question: Through the study of G-d’s Torah and deeds of Chesed, am I getting closer to the Almighty? Are my deeds and thoughts elevating my spirit, so that I come nearer to the original source: The Cre-

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ator that blew into my nostrils nishmat chayim? Furthermore, man cannot be subjected to the whims of any other human being, including the capricious decisions of a ruler. Even kings must obey laws. They are not above the law, let alone be the law, as Luis XIV was to argue centuries later with the often quoted: “L’Etat c’est moi.” A Jewish King was a constitutional king. He was instructed to write an additional Torah that he was to carry with him at all times. It was a clear lesson: The King is not infallible, he is mortal. Only Gd’s Laws comprise the totality of truth, laws that everyone, including a King, must live by. When we go back to our initial quote: “Avadim hayinu leFar’oh beMitzrayim,” we note from the wording of the text that we were the personal slaves of a man, the pharaoh. We were not the Egyptians’ slaves. Our Rabbis already pointed out that the edict to throw every baby boy into the Nile included the Egyptian children as well. Apparently, the pharaoh’s astrologers had told him that a leader was about to be born, and he did not have any misgivings about killing innocent Egyptian children as well. Such was the power of a despot, whose will had to be obeyed without reservation. Under such circumstances Moshe Rabbeinu came with a disruptive set of laws: “Chok umishpat,” rules that apply to all men, the ruled and their rulers. “Heashir lo yarbe vehadal lo yam’it” rich and poor are treated equally under the law. A judge dare not have one of the litigants stand while the other sits when in a court of law. Kings and despots were surely not sympathetic to this new worldview. It meant a rejection of assumptions centuries old that had given cruel chieftains supposedly supernatural legitimacy. A “no” to slavery and a “no” to absolute power became a disruptive and very potent message. As kings and autocrats were repressive, so were their gods who constantly solicited tribute and blind obedience. The “Parah Adumah” should be evaluated against this backdrop. The main function of the ashes of this animal was not to challenge our intelligence by formulating an apparently

self-contradictory process, because while the ashes serve to purify the impure, they make impure the Kohen that participated in its elaboration. The function of the ashes of the “Parah Adumah” was not only to be a counterweight to impurity. Its basic function was “letaher,” to purify. In Egypt and in other idol worshipping nations, the gods were forever demanding total obedience. Bribes had to be offered to obtain their favors and goodwill. Moshe Rabbeinu, however, presents a different, nay a unique deity, a G-d that is not visible, Who has no needs that humans can satisfy. He cannot be bought or bribed. This G-d does not demand human sacrifices, as Akeidat Yitzchak proclaimed to all. He demands that you love Him: “veahavta et HaShem Elokechah,” and “V’ahevchah,” He will love you back. The ashes of the Parah Adumah are meant not only to forgive and erase past misdeeds, they purify. They come not only “lechaper,” to atone, they come to “letaher,” to cleanse, to elevate you. The G-d that Moshe presents, loves the widow and the orphan, and protects them. He instructs to love the stranger, because “we were strangers in Egypt.” Even though we were enslaved, we were also fed and should not forget that. When famine struck the entire geographical area, the Egyptians took us in and saved us from starvation. While Amalek is the archenemy of the Jewish people, the Egyptians are not portrayed as an evil that has to be eradicated forever. Even though they enslaved us, we also have a debt of gratitude, because they kept us alive.

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Yet, slavery is not compatible with human dignity and we should never return to Egypt. Egypt is the cult of the dead; we are inspired by life. While Egypt adores edifices and palaces like the pyramids, we sanctify time. The dark period of enslavement was temporary, when viewed with the lens of history. Maybe even necessary, because suffering brings people together and allows them to understand, firsthand, the lot of the downtrodden, empathize with the less fortunate who cry out for understanding and recognition. The pharaoh realized that the Hebrews were becoming an entity when he reasoned: “Hinei am Benei Yisrael…” and became the first one to call the Hebrews a people, a nation. Exile and the future enslavement became the catalysts to forge a brotherhood and a commonality of purpose, a shared destiny, indispensable for nation-building. It is no wonder that the expression “Zecher liTziat Mitzrayim” is ubiquitous, present at every recitation of “Kiddush” and prayer on all holy days. This event, together with the giving of the Torah at Sinai, became the defining experiences that manifested the uniqueness of the Jewish people. So profound were these experiences that centuries of diaspora have not succeeded in weakening the resolve for their survival, notwithstanding hate and persecutions, along with rejection by the other monotheistic faiths. Unlike the Greeks and Romans of antiquity, the Philistines and Amalekites, the Jewish people was blessed with continuity and vitality to this very day, as wonderfully expressed by the modern Medinah, the State of Israel.

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T O R A H

Chometz! Again? by Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss

he annual seek and destroy mission for all kinds of chometz has begun! For many, there is an attitude of same ole, same ole, here we go again. We’ll be opening up the suitcases to get rid of cookies before going on Pesach trips, looking in the front pockets of our jackets near the lapels to ferret out crumbs, cleaning out the couch, vacuuming the children’s knapsacks from leftover lunches, scouring the hood of the stove for traces of residual chometz, and all of the scores of other chometz pursuits that we do from year to year. It has become almost a spiritual drudgery, a painful rite of passage to get to the seder finish line. Yet other people have managed to almost completely rid themselves from the manacles of cleaning nearly altogether. They get a cleaning service and four women come in for six hours while they go for a manicure and pedicure. Then the husbands tell them, “That’s enough, I’ll take care of the rest with the saying of bitul (the nullification of the chometz) and as a backup I’ll also empower the rabbi to sell any chometz that we might have missed.” And with that, presto, thousands of years of sacred minhag, whence holy women, world over, have toiled to seek out every crumb, is threatened with extinction. We must understand that this annual occupation is in no way an example of been-there-done-that! Most of us are familiar with the fact that chometz, leaven, symbolizes the yeitzer hara, the evil inclination - because just as the leaven agitates the dough to rise, so too the yeitzer hara agitates us to rise up against our Creator. And it is because of this very symbolism that the symbolic search for chometz takes on, for every individual, a different meaning each and every year. For it is of the utmost importance for one to realize that every

year there are new and different yeitzer haras that challenge each of us. This should be obvious as we go through different life changes. Before a bar mitzvah a boy doesn’t even have a yeitzer hara, so after bar mitzvah his cleaning for chometz is altogether more meaningful. When one becomes of marriageable age, there are new yeitzer haras galore. How they treat the people they date, how they interact with their shadchan, if what they are looking for is Torahdig; these are just some of their new challenges. When they get married, the chometz becomes even more complex. How do they treat their spouse, their in-laws, etc. And the plot just thickens when children come along. Then, the children become teenagers and there’s a veritable mountain of chometz to deal with. Then come daughters-in-law, sons-in-law, weddings - all of the stuff that the yeitzer hara has so much fun with. Later on in life, how one adjusts to one’s spouse in an empty nest or in the sickness of advanced age might produce chometz. The varieties of chometz never stop. So, as you can see, for the thinking person, the chometz experience is never just humdrum. It’s always changing as we mature. The truth of the matter is that Chazal assures us that as long as we live there will be new tests thrown into our paths by the yeitzer hara. As the Mishnah in PirkeiAvos says, “Al ta’amin b’atzm’cha ad yom mos’cha - Do not trust yourself until the day you die,” for one of the major purposes of life is to widely exercise our bechirah, our freewill. It is in this area that we are more than the animals who have no freewill. But, in order to have bechirah, we always need to have challenging choices so it should come as no surprise to us that, as we advance in our character perfection and religious conviction, Hashem will up the ante and provide us with new tests along

our journey through life. As we are taught, “Kol hagodol mei’chaveiro yitzro godol heimenu - Whoever is greater than his fellow has a bigger evil inclination than his companion.” This is because when he is on a higher spiritual level, his tests must be grander in order for him to be at least tempted to make the wrong decision. That’s why the great generation of the Dor Dei’ah, the generation of the Jews in the desert, was confronted with such great challenges. They went three days without water, for after seeing the ten plagues and the miracle of the Red Sea, for them to be tested at all, it needed to be a whopper of a test. So, as we clean for chometz this year, let’s ponder what new challenges we have in life. Is it the beginning of a middle-aged crisis? Is our marriage becoming a bit stale? Are we too busy for our parents? Are we becoming disconnected from our children? Are we starting to cut some shady corners in our business? Are we becoming too busy to learn and is our davening just a burden? Are we losing touch with Hashem? Are we misbehaving with the internet? When we finally get to the finish line of biur chometz, burning or destroying our chometz, let’s pray to Hashem that we can rid ourselves of these new temptations and in that merit may He bless us with long life, good health, and everything wonderful. Sheldon Zeitlin takes dictation of, and edits, Rabbi Weiss’s articles. This past week Rav Weiss finished Shas Mishnayos on the phone. You can start the new cycle with him by dialing 718.906.6471. Or you can listen to his new daily Shiur on Orchos Chaim L’harosh by dialing 718.906.6400, then going to selection 4 for Mussar and then to selection 4. Both are FREE services. Rabbi Weiss is currently stepping up his speaking engagements. To bring him to your community, call now 718.916.3100 or email RMMWSI@aol.com. To receive a weekly cassette tape or CD directly from Rabbi Weiss, please send a check to Rabbi Moshe Meir Weiss, P.O. Box 140726, Staten Island, NY 10314 orcontact himat RMMWSI@aol.com. Now back in print is a large-size paperback edition of Power Bentching. To order call him at 718-9163100 or email at above. Attend Rabbi Weiss’s weekly shiur at the Landau Shul, Avenue L and East 9th in Flatbush, Tuesday nights at 9:30 p.m. Rabbi Weiss’s Daf Yomi and Mishnah Yomisshiurim can be heard LIVE on KolHaloshon at (718) 9066400. Write to KolHaloshon@ gmail.com for details. They can now also be seen on TorahAnyTime.com.

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T O R A H

THE SHORT VORT

BIGGER AND HOLY GROUP BY RABBI RON YITZCHOK EISENMAN

pilgrimage to Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Hospital is a prerequisite for anyone considering a career which involves

chesed. On second thought, it is a prerequisite to being a compassionate human being. If you are looking for a model of compassionate care and unconditional acceptance of all, spend an hour at “Sloan.” On Friday morning February 12th, with the temperature struggling to reach double digits, I returned to the place where so many people from all over the globe turn their hopes and their prayers. On this day it did not look like the world class cancer center that it is; rather, it was akin to a third world field hospital. There were patients on gurneys lining the halls. Many of these patients had spent the night in the hallway. This was because the hospital never turns anyone away. They were functioning at 118% capacity, as every single bed in the hospital was occupied! I saw nurses patiently attempting to communicate and calm patients whose mother tongue was Hindi, or Punjabi; the nurses struggled to make themselves understood and to help the patients. The fellow whom I was visiting informed me that he would be staying over Shabbos. When I inquired as to what he would be eating, he said there was nothing to worry about as there are Shabbos rooms stocked with supplies, chulent and kugel. He also mentioned that Satmar Bikur Cholim provides individual Shabbos containers, including a silver-like Kiddush

becher, a small tablecloth and disposable hospital-approved candles. I marveled at the chesed the Bikur Cholim societies provide to Jews they don’t even know. On the way out I noticed the Shabbos rooms and could not resist taking a peek to see for myself. I was awed. In the refrigerator were individual portions of gefilte fish with small individual containers of horseradish, mayonnaise and many other dips. I was impressed by the care that was put into making each serving just right. There were stacks of newspapers in Hebrew, Yiddish and English; all for the taking. Suddenly I realized I only had one hour on my meter and as anyone in New York knows: never be late for your meter! As I reached the vehicle I noticed a policeman removing his large ticket-issuing device from his back pocket. As I approached him he said, “I’m sorry, but your time is up.” However, before he actually wrote the summons, he eyed me in a strange sort of way. He was looking at my beard and studying my face. Suddenly, he asked, “Hey, are you one of those guys who works for the “Bigger and Holy Group?” I had no idea what he was referring to; so I asked him, “What is the Bigger and Holy Group?” “You know; the group of people who look like you with the beards and hats, who visit the sick and distribute food to those in the hospital and their families. They always tell me they are the ‘Bigger Holy Group.’” I slowly said to myself, “Bigger and holy… bigger and holy…? What could he mean?” Then suddenly, like a light bulb, I began to hear myself say, “Bigger n’

Holy… Biggur n’ holim… Bikur Cholim!!” “You must mean the Bikur Cholim Group!” I said. The officer looked at me and answered, “Yes, that’s what I said, the Bigger and Holy Group!” “No, sorry, I’m not part of the Bigger and Holy Group; however, I’m familiar with their work.” “So even if you are not an official part of the group you are still ‘one of them,’ isn’t that correct?” “Yes Officer, I know what you mean, I am one of them.” “Well, in that case, you can go. No ticket for you today.” “Officer, I don’t understand. What does the Bigger and Holy Group have to do with my not getting a summons?” The officer explained, “This morning, when it was about 9 degrees, a guy approached me who looked like you; you know - big guy with a big hat and a big beard. And he said, ‘Excuse me, it’s very cold today, please take this thermos of hot coffee and these Danishes.’ “I said, ‘You know I’m not Jewish; why are you giving me this food?’ “He said, ‘All of us, Jew and nonJew, are created in G-d’s image. (See Avos 3:14) It’s freezing outside, you need to stay warm; please take this.’ “If he could do that for me on a cold day like today, I can do a nice thing back to one of his friends, no? After all, we’re all connected.” I looked at the policeman and thought back to the hospital full of people of all religions and ethnicities and of the equal and compassionate care they all receive. “Yes Officer, you are so right, we are all connected.” Ron Yitzchok Eisenman, Rabbi, Congregation Ahavas Israel, Passaic, NJ

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R E A L

orman Eisen met Barack Obama as law school classmates at Harvard University, where they became friends, remaining in touch even after their school days ended. When Obama eventually won the US Presidency, he appointed Eisen, in 2009, to serve as his Special Counsel for Ethics and Government Reform. Only a couple of years later, in 2011, the president tapped Eisen to be the US ambassador to the Czechs. It was no coincidence that Obama chose Eisen to be ambassador in Prague of all places: “The president thought it would be a remarkable thing for the son of a Czechoslovak Holocaust survivor to return and represent the US.

L I F E

“No one from my immediate family had returned since my mother fled Communism in 1949, and the symbolism of returning there was just too unique an opportunity to pass up.” In 1944, Frieda - along with her parents, siblings and other family members was sent to Auschwitz. Although she and two siblings miraculously survived, their parents and other relatives weren’t as fortunate.

THE NAZI INSIGNIA UNDERNEATH THE TABLE On his first day as ambassador, following all of the formal greetings and arrival ceremonies, Eisen sat alone in the li-

brary of his new home reflecting on the events of the day. The head of the ambassador’s household, Miroslav Cernik, came into the room and informed the ambassador that there was something Cernik wanted to show him. Cernik led Eisen to a small, ornate table and asked Eisen to look underneath the table. The ambassador, who thought it a rather unusual request, complied nonetheless, and got down on his hands and knees, crawling under the table. Nothing could have prepared Eisen for what he found there: a sticker with the clearly discernable image of an eagle and a swastika, the formal symbol of the Nazi party, emblazoned upon it, thus marking the table as former Nazi property. Cernik explained that he had not wanted Eisen to make the upsetting discovery for himself by chance. Eisen, who had envisioned carrying out the many responsibilities of his office, was unprepared for such a thing and described seeing the sticker as “a punch in the gut,” hitting him on an emotional, as well as a physical, level. In an ironic twist, Eisen would later use that very table during his tenure as ambassador as the stand for his Chanukah menorah.

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THE PETSCHEK VILLA The Nazis were not the original owners of that table or that house. The US ambassador’s residence in Prague, named Petschek Villa, was originally built by a wealthy Jewish industrialist by the name of Otto Petschek in the late 1920s. Petschek, who made his money from coal mine holdings as well as banking, was one of the wealthiest men in Czechoslovakia, before his untimely death in 1934. With Germany’s designs for Czechoslovakia clear and the threat of an invasion on the horizon, Petschek’s family fled the country in 1938. The property was subsequently seized by the Germans and commandeered for use as the headquarters of the Wehrmacht (German armed forces) commander of Prague, General Toussaint, his staff, and other Nazi officials and aides during their seven-year occupation of Prague. Occupied afterwards briefly by the Russians and then the Czechoslovak General Staff, the US leased the property in 1945 before eventually buying it from the Czechoslovak government in 1948. On his arrival at the Petschek Villa,

Eisen had the home returned to its Jewish roots and made suitable for a Torah-observant Jewish family to live in, kashering the kitchens and affixing mezuzos to the doorposts of the residence where he and his family would be staying. The kitchen staff “went into overdrive mastering the Jewish dietary laws,” learning to make traditional Jewish foods like challah and matzah ball soup, and sourcing kosher products, especially a variety of kosher meats, which were unavailable in Prague and had to be ordered from either Berlin or Vienna. Eisen and his family kept Shabbos in their new Czech home each week, sometimes in the company of various dignitaries and dining in a room and at a table that were once in the hands of the Nazis. As Eisen describes it: “It was mind-blowing, to eat on kosher State Department china where the commander of the Nazi Wehrmacht used to live.” Frieda opted not to return to her homeland, even when her son was there serving as the ambassador. She passed away in 2012, during her son’s tenure in Prague, but not without a “tremendous sense of triumph” at the fact that her son

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had returned to the country of her birth as the representative of the most powerful nation on earth. Frieda was fond of telling people, “The Nazis deported us in cattle cars and my son flew back on Air Force One,” a reference to a trip that Eisen made to Prague with Obama in 2010 for an international treaty signing ceremony. Joe Lieberman testified regarding Eisen’s appointment in the US Senate: “It is indeed a profound historical justice that the ambassador’s residence in Prague, which was originally built by a Jewish family that was forced to flee Prague by the Nazis, (which), in turn, the Nazis took over as their headquarters, now 70 years later is occupied by Norman and his family. And I might, on a point of personal privilege, add that they observe the Sabbath there every Friday night and Saturday. So if you need any evidence that there is a G-d, I offer that to you.” Eisen ended up serving in Prague for almost four years, one of the longest tenures of any recent US ambassador there. Reprinted from Jewish Life Magazine, http://www.jewishlife.co.za/

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APRIL 2016

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APRIL 2016

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SPECIAL REPORT

SURVIVING THE MIDDLE SEAT By Country Yossi

hat’s worse: sitting in a middle seat on a long flight or having a hole drilled into your head? More than half of respondents to a recent survey would rather go to the dentist than tell a seatmate, “Excuse me; I need to go to the bathroom.” The survey, commissioned by Yichud Mosdos and run by the Chelm Strategy Group, also found that: • A majority of Americans would rather get stuck in traffic on 13th Ave. (56 percent) or go on a blind date with a blind date (also 56 percent) than sit in the middle seat on a full flight. • People dislike the middle seat so much that they go to great lengths to avoid it altogether. Fifty percent of Hungarians say they would be likely to take an aisle seat being offered on the next available flight, while one in five Chareidim (20 percent for those who flunked Math) say they would actually stay overnight at a Glatt Kosher airport hotel for an aisle seat on the first flight the next morning. • Nine percent of Poilisher report

that they would refuse to sit in the middle seat on a full flight if it were more than 24 hours while 18 percent of Galicianers said they would rather have pins stuck in their eyes. 12 percent of Yehkis preferred Root Canal and an astounding 56 percent of Israelis didn’t understand the question! The survey also determined the top five middle seat annoyances as follows (the survey allowed multiple answers, so the stats below reflect the percentage of people who chose each option): • Having a nosy seatmate peering over your shoulder (84 percent) • Crawling over someone to get to the bathroom (83 percent) • Not being able to stretch out (83 percent) • Not having room to Fall Koirim • Having an overweight seatmate on either side of you (80 percent) • Not having a place to rest your head (71 percent) • Fighting on both sides for rights to the armrests! As airlines try to maximize the number of people on each plane, continue in the old practice of overbooking, and reduce and eliminate (or

charge for) opportunities to make changes to our airline reservations, frequent travelers are almost doomed to a middle seat experience at some point. Here are Country Yossi’s tips for avoiding and, if need be, surviving the dreaded middle seat on your next flight. 1. Make a narrow escape. Typically, your first chance to avoid the middle seat is to select an aisle or window when you first book your flight. (This is free on some airlines and available for a fee on others.) If only middle seats are available or you’re pre-assigned to one despite your preferences, it might still be possible to make a last-minute escape not only out of that middle seat, but into a far better seat. A few days before you fly, contact the airline to inquire if any better seats have become available, or even if you can pay for an affordable upgrade. If this fails (it often will), you can try again at check-in, where you may have much better success. I would suggest giving this a try using online check-in, which is available up to 24 hours before most flights. You can often pick your seat assignment

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during online check-in, although, as noted above, it costs an extra fee on some airlines. If you hate the middle seat as much as the survey suggests most people do, the fee may be worth it. In my own experience, however, I have frequently found the option to change to a better seat unavailable using online check-in, as the best seats are hard to come by - bad seats are easy! If you don’t have any luck online, you can try again at the airport checkin counter - just be sure to arrive early to get ahead of everyone else trying to do the same thing. You can increase your chances by not only asking for a seat change or an affordable upgrade, but also inquiring whether you might be booked into an exit row seat (which may cost extra). If the check-in agents are unable to do this for you, I suggest you try shmearing! If this doesn’t work try again at the gate. These folks have final say on seating arrangements, and in my experience this last opportunity is also your best opportunity. Your odds get better if you are among the first in line, are polite, don’t have cholent on your beard (especially if you’re a woman) and have some mitigating circumstance (this is the time to speak up if you frequently suffer from flatulence or if you’re so tall or fat that sitting in a middle seat is particularly uncomfortable for you).

3. 2-3-2 beats 3-3. If you do end up in a middle seat, hope that it is on a plane with 2-3-2 seating configuration rather than 3-3 or the like. There are two reasons for this: first of all, there are far fewer middle seats (only one per row) on a 2-3-2 plane than on a 3-3 plane (which have two per row), and if any seats are open, chances are better that you can slip into an aisle or window seat. Second, in the 2-3-2 configuration, your neighbors are both in aisle seats, so chances double that at least one of them will be

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awake and amenable to allowing you to get up now and then. 4. Go before you go. If ever there was a time to behave like a 4-year-old and visit the lavatory in the airport immediately before leaving, this is it. 5. Beat feet before they sleep. If you do need to get up from your seat, do so before the person in the aisle seat starts watching the movie, pulls out a book, opens her laptop, falls asleep, etc.

2. Assume priority placement on the armrests. Travelers get confused about proper armrest etiquette on full planes, but my rule of thumb has worked well for me over many years and countless flights: the person in the middle seat has priority when it comes to positioning on the armrests on both sides. If that person prefers to stake out the space closest to the seatback, he gets it, and other folks in more comfortable seats get the slightly less comfortable part of the armrest. I’ve only sat next to a few folks who seemed to think they were entitled to all the space around them irrespective of seat assignments, and they had no respect for personal space of any stripe or type - I think a couple of them would have put on my headphones or eaten my food if I had allowed it.

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6. Look both ways. If your aircraft has a windowmiddle-aisle configuration, you might also want to get up and out of your seat before the person in the window seat falls asleep, giving him the opportunity to get up at the same time you do. Otherwise, not only might you get trapped beside a sleeping person in the aisle seat as described above, but when you finally settle in yourself, you may also be forced to get up by the person in the window seat.

7. Use sleep and comfort aids. By this I don’t mean drugs, but rather neck pillows, eye covers, noise-canceling headphones and other products that make it possible to sleep or rest fully while sitting straight up with nothing to lean on. Check out our 10 tips for Sleeping on Planes for more helpful ideas. 8. Hide in plain sight. In a middle seat, your exposure to neighbors is doubled, thereby also doubling your chances of having

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an overly talkative or prying neighbor. This is great if you’re interested in shmoozing with your neighbor, but if not, employ some of the products above, even as a decoy, to telegraph your unavailability to garrulous seatmates. Again, think eye masks, books, CY magazines, iPod earphones, surrounding yourself with a cardboard box… anything that closes off some of your senses to your neighbor’s invasive utterances will do the trick. 9. Hide in your Sefer. This is a perfect time to catch up on your Daf Yomi! Being Maaver Sedra or whipping out your Tikkun to prepare the laining is another great suggestion. Saying Tehillim can be very inspiring and finishing the whole sefer will be very rewarding! Whatever you do, don’t watch the shmutz they’re showing on the screen! Burying yourself in the sefer directly in front of you can grant you some escape from the close quarters of Tuma on all sides. 10. Lighten your carry-on load. Now that the airlines are charging to check any and all bags, this tip may win you some legroom but lose you some money. Even so - if you are already checking bags, consider putting a bit more of your belongings into those checked bags so you have little or no stuff to cram under the seat in front of you. The middle seat is cramped enough without also giving up all of your legroom to a shopping bag filled with absolutely nothing you need in flight. 11. Surrender. If you end up in a middle seat for a flight of any duration, it will help if you accept early on that it ain’t gonna be fun, easy or comfortable, so you might as well make the best of it. It’s going to be a slog, but sooner or later you will find yourself on the ground, with no one banging your elbows or slamming your knees. In other words, as the story says, “Gam Zeh Yaavor… this too shall pass!”

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TEN TIPS FOR SLEEPING ON PLANES

ith many of our readers flying somewhere for Pesach, as a public service we offer these - Ten Tips for Sleeping on Planes Some air travelers have an almost magical ability to conk out as soon as the plane engine revs, and then stay asleep until landing. If you’re not one of the blessed few, here are some ideas for making it easier to catch some zzz’s on your next flight. 1. Book a window seat. Not only can you prop your head against the cabin wall or window, you won’t have seatmates waking you up every time they have to go to the bathroom. 2. Dress comfortably. Wear loose-fitting, breathable clothing and comfortable shoes. Wear layers, as airplane cabins have an amazing ability to change from hot and stuffy to cold and breezy and back again over the course of a flight. 3. Avoid caffeine. It might be tempting to whittle away your time with a latte while waiting to board, but you’ll pay for it later. Also skip the tea and coffee service onboard the plane. 4. Drink water. While you don’t want to drink so much that you’ll have to keep getting up to use the restroom, staying hydrated will make it easier for your body to rest. As water may not be readily available to you throughout a flight, buy your own bottle in the airport. 5. Bring pillows and blankets. Nowadays, with some airlines charging for pillows and blankets or removing them from the plane to save money, it’s best to bring your own. That way you can also be sure to have a product that works for you, whether it be a neck pillow, an inflatable cushion, or fleece blanket. If you forget yours at home, most airports have shops that sell them. 6. Bring an eye cover. Some airlines may give you eye covers for international flights, but you can’t count on it, so bring your own. You’ll

look silly, but it’s amazing how blocking out light can make it easier to nod off. 7. Bring ear plugs. If you plan to use ear plugs, try out a few different brands before you fly. Everyone’s ear canals are shaped differently and not all brands may work for you. 8. Read a Sefer! As soon as you start learning the Yeitzer Hora will make sure you fall asleep! 9. Fasten your seat belt over your blanket. The flight attendants will wake you up if they can’t see it.

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10. Consider sleep aids, but be careful. Before you take any sleep medication, talk to your doctor about which might work for you. Melatonin is a mild, natural sleep aid many travelers find helpful, although it may not be enough for some. If you’re going to take anything stronger, make sure the flight is long enough (eight or more hours) so the product can work through your system. The last thing you want to do is wake up in another country feeling like you just chugged a bottle of Shnapps.

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HEALTH & ADVICE

Dear Bubby If you would like advice from Bubby send your letters to: Bubby, c/o Country Yossi Family Magazine, 1310 48th Street, Suite 308, Brooklyn, New York 11219

UNPRODUCTIVE COMPARISONS Dearest Bubby, I am happily married to a wonderful man for the past three years. We have two beautiful children and I am truly happy with my life. However, it seems that as soon as we are around other couples I am immediately insecure and unhappy. I am always comparing my husband to my friends’ husbands. If my friend calls me and tells me about the nice, thoughtful gesture her husband has made, although I am truly happy for her, my next thought is always on my husband and why he’s not doing that same thing for me. Recently my friend called me and told me that for her birthday her husband bought her the most thoughtful and generous gift. For the rest of the evening, I was harboring resentment toward my own innocent husband. Even though I knew it was unfair and that I should control myself, I simply could not help feeling bad for myself. Last week I was on the phone with my sister on a Sunday morning, when she informed me that she would be spending the day relaxing and taking it easy. Her husband thought that she deserved a break and decided to take the kids for the day to give her some time for herself. Honestly, the first thought that consumed me and prevented me from being truly happy for my sister, whom I love, and who does in fact deserve a break, was hey, wait a minute - I work hard, don’t I deserve that same thoughtfulness? Bubby - please understand that my husband is genuinely a good man. I know he doesn’t deserve the constant comparison. Not only does it affect the way I treat him, but it also

takes a toll on my happiness. When I see this pattern repeating itself again and again, what can I possibly tell myself to avoid the constant cycle of bitter comparisons and self pity? All I want is to be content with my life and to feel genuine happiness for others. Please help! Wife in Strife Dearest W in S, Being happy for others is one of the most challenging issues that we face; coming in as a close second is being happy with ourselv es. These two concepts are actually one and the same - for if we can truly find inner happiness and contentment, we are automatically inclined to hav e true joy for others’ good fortune. It is human nature to assume that other people are happier than we are and that the grass is alway s greener in somebody else’s y ard. The irony of it all, of course, is that while we look at them they are look ing at us, assuming that we must hav e all that they lack . “Ay zehoo ashir - Hasameach B’chelk o.” Wiser words hav e y et to be spok en. Perhaps if ev ery one could implement these words of wisdom into their liv es, there would be a lot less depression and jealousy. Marriage isn’t easy. It tak es a lot of hard work and compromise. It is quite natural to idealize the liv es of others, assuming that they are happier than us. People whom we do not liv e with tend to seem wonderful and flaw-free. Obv iously no one is perfect and this misconception can deceiv e us into think ing that others are far happier than we are, when in fact

most people deal with the same difficulties and challenges. Married couples (the honest ones) will be the first to tell y ou that marriage is not a walk in the park . This is not to say that it’s not wonderful, but in truth there are the tough times and the occasional spats. Recognizing that no marriage is perfect and that all couples ex perience some amount of tribulation is the first step in allev iating y our jealous tendencies. You must also realize that one nev er truly k nows what goes on behind closed doors. This is a fundamental rule in marriage. While a couple may portray an image of bliss and harmony on the outside, this is not an indication that they conduct themselv es the same way when no one is look ing. Furthermore, who’s to say why a person behav es the way he/she does? Perhaps the sister y ou refer to in y our letter has earned her ‘Sunday off ’ due to her husband’s wrongdoing. Someone who receiv es an ex pensiv e gift may seem lik e the luck y one, when in fact they might prefer to trade it in for a k ind word or compliment. The point is that we nev er k now why someone is on the receiv ing end - and we should therefore waste no time with env y, but rather assume that all is as it should be. You are only hurting y ourself by comparing y ours to others. This holds true for ev ery thing from children to spouses to monetary gain. Focus on y our own, appreciate what y ou hav e, and alway s k now in y our heart that Hashem is in control. We must trust that all is for the best. Behatzlacha, Lov e, Bubby

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HEALTH & ADVICE

MIND YOUR WORDS WHAT YOU SAID IS NOT WHAT I HEARD

alking. Few things come as naturally to us humans once we learn the basics and get the hang of it. We do few things as much as we talk, so most of us tend to think we’re pretty good at it. From the moment we open our eyes in the morning we talk… to our kids, and their teachers, and their friends, the barista at Starbucks and the lady beside us at the gym, or the guy next to us in shul, to our friends, and our co-workers and spouses… all day long, each and every day, so what could possibly be wrong? Quite a bit, actually, if we stop to consider how often our high stakes communications go wrong, somehow leaving us hurt, misunderstood, at odds, and generally feeling that things could have gone better. Talking, it turns out, is not the same as communicating. The act of talking is simple; communicating, on the other hand, involves the exchange and sharing of information and ideas - and to do the latter well takes thoughtfulness, mindfulness of the goal and practice. The words we use when communi-

cating are important, but not as important as what we communicate through our body language, which makes up a whopping 90% of our communication. The human brain is taking in and deciphering all sorts of sensory input at lightning speed, taking in not just our words but our posture, body movement, eye contact and tone, to name just a few. The simple statement, “let’s talk,” can convey numerous things depending on how we say it and the perceptions of the listener. If our tone is soft and we have chosen our timing well, if we are making gentle eye contact and our body posture is open and relaxed, we convey a desire to communicate. Change the tone, adopt a direct stare or lack of direct eye contact, fold your arms around your body and with those same words you have communicated a fight message that is likely to raise defensiveness and inhibit an open exchange of ideas or feelings. You can try it right now and see for yourself the difference you feel when you cross your arms firmly or drop them freely at your sides. Depending on what the goal of this conversa-

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tion is, these are important differences. Once we’ve taken the time for selfawareness and have adjusted our body language accordingly, we’re in the perfect position to remind ourselves that empathy is an important aspect of good communication. Empathy is the ability to put yourself in the other person’s shoes - and this is important because perception is reality. Two sides of an argument can both be equally real and true to the people who hold those opposing positions and no amount of arguing or explaining is going to make their truth less real to them. We gain nothing when we speak at each other and only move closer to resolution or compromise when we accept the validity of the other side. By valuing the relationship above the desire to be right or gain the upper hand, we make room for both parties to win or at the very least save face and feel valued. In any relationship we inevitably have to choose: Do you want to be happy or do you want to be right? Most often you can’t have both. An aspect of communication that often gets lost in the yearning to be heard is the ability to listen well. When the other party speaks we often make assumptions about where they’re going with this and dismiss it out of hand. We judge and adjourn before ever hearing the testimony. Our body language might kick in with a roll of the eyes, or we turn away rather than toward and in numerous ways we show indifference, intolerance or frustration. We can’t hear what someone wants to share because our mind is already busy forming a counter argument based on the assumptions we already made. We respond without ever having developed an open, honest dialogue. Worse, we’re unaware of our fabrications and believe we’ve listened. To listen well there are three steps: • Listen. Really, truly listen with an open mind. If you are already preparing your rebuttal as you listen, you haven’t listened. • Ask questions to clarify your understanding of their message. This is necessary both to show that you’re listening and to help you understand a position that might very well feel completely foreign. • Restate the message. “You feel stifled and want more flexibility.” Continued on Page 84

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HEALTH & ADVICE

WHERE’S THE BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD TO LOSE WEIGHT?

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he gym!” say the muscle-bound personal trainers, raising their hands (but not really getting that far because their deltoids get in the way). “The (huff!) track (puff!)” say the distance runners, bicyclists, triathletes, and other types trucking along with sweat in their eyes and numbers stuck on their chests. “The kitchen!” say the nutritionists, dieticians, organic produce purveyors, and washed-up chefs slinging faux diet plans to the masses. But they’re all wrong. Because real, successful, sustainable weight loss comes from achieving excellence in a completely unexpected realm: the bedroom. Yes, it’s true! You can absolutely sleep your way to slender. In fact, no matter how many pounds you press, how many miles you log, how much kohlrabi you crunch, it won’t get you anywhere near your weight-loss goals unless you’re also getting enough quality sleep. A recent study found sub-par sleep could undermine weight loss by as much as 55 percent! The good news

is that just a few simple tweaks to your p.m. routine can mean serious weight loss success. So open your eyes: Here are eight science-backed suggestions to lose while you snooze. Try your sleep switch. Don’t count sheep, eat lamb! (Or better yet, a bit of turkey.) Tryptophan, an amino acid found in most meats, has demonstrated powerful sleep-inducing effects. A recent study among insomniacs found that just 1/4 gram about what you’ll find in a skinless chicken drumstick or three ounces of lean turkey meat - was enough to significantly increase hours of deep sleep. And that can translate into easy weight loss. Researchers from the University of Colorado found that dieters consumed 6 percent fewer calories when they got enough sleep. For someone on a 2,000-calorie diet, that’s 120 calories per day, which could amount to nearly a one-pound weight loss in a month! The National Sleep Foundation suggests seven to eight hours of sleep for most adults. 1. Set strict kitchen hours Nighttime fasting - aka closing

the kitchen early - may help you lose more weight, even if you eat more food throughout the day, according to a study in the journal Cell Metabolism. Researchers put groups of mice on a high-fat, high-calorie diet for 100 days. Half of them were allowed to nibble throughout the night and day on a healthy, controlled diet, while the others only had access to food for eight hours, but could eat whatever they wanted. The result of the 16-hour food ban? The fasting mice stayed lean, while the mice who noshed ‘round the clock became obese - even though both groups consumed the same amount of calories! 2. Shake things up Having a protein shake before hitting the sack may boost your metabolism, according to one Florida State University study. Researchers found that men who consumed an evening snack that included 30g of either whey or casein protein had a higher resting metabolic rate the next morning than when eating nothing. Protein is more thermogenic than carbs or fat, meaning your body burns more calories digesting it.

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3. Make a mint Certain scents can make your mouth water, and others can actually suppress your appetite. One study published in the Journal of Neurological and Orthopedic Medicine found that people who sniffed peppermint every two hours lost an average of 5 pounds a month! Banana, green apple, and vanilla had similar effects. Consider burning a minty candle until you head to bed to fill the room with slimming smells. If you don’t want to bother with blowing out candles before you turn down the covers, try adding a few drops of peppermint oil to your pillow.

cal venues painted different colors: red, yellow and blue. Participants reported the red and yellow rooms to be equally appetizing (and ate the most in the yellow room), but found the food in the blue room only half as appealing. 7. Hide the iPad Research suggests that the more electronics we bring into the bedroom, the fatter we get - especially among children. A study in the Pediatric Obesity journal found that kids who bask

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in the nighttime glow of a TV or computer don’t get enough rest and suffer from poor lifestyle habits. Researchers found that students with access to one electronic device were 1.47 times as likely to be overweight as kids with no devices in the bedroom. That increased to 2.57 times for kids with three devices. Leave your iPad in the living room. 8. And switch off the tube, too Did you know lean people watch less TV?

4. Let in the cold A striking new study published in the journal Diabetes suggests that simply blasting the air conditioner or turning down the heat in winter may help us attack belly fat while we sleep. Colder temperatures subtly enhance the effectiveness of our stores of brown fat. Fat keeps you warm by helping you burn through the fat stored in your belly. Participants spent a few weeks sleeping in bedrooms with varying temperatures: a neutral 75 degrees, a cool 66 degrees, and a balmy 81 degrees. After four weeks of sleeping at 66 degrees, the subjects had almost doubled their volumes of brown fat. (And yes, that means they lost belly fat.) 5. Throw out the night light Exposure to light at night doesn’t just interrupt your chances of a great night’s sleep; it may also result in weight gain according to a new study published in the American Journal of Epidemiology. Study subjects who slept in the darkest rooms were 21 percent less likely to be obese than those sleeping in the lightest rooms. 6. Get the night-time blues There’s a reason why Fast Food restaurants all have the same redand-yellow theme colors. Those tones supposedly send us subliminal messages that help make us hungry. Does the same trick work at home? An experiment published in the interior design magazine Contract presented partygoers with three identi-

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HEALTH & ADVICE

Preventing Alzheimer’s By Learning Gemara BY AMANDA BRADLEY

t is estimated that 1 in 8 Americans over the age of 65 develop some form of dementia. There is still no cure. However, while doctors have not yet succeeded in preventing dementia, it is possible to delay the onset for a number of years by adopting a combination of lifestyle changes: eating a healthy, Mediterranean-type diet, taking regular exercise, and undertaking activities that stretch the brain.

WHY ‘BRAIN-TRAINING’ WORKS New research into brain plasticity has revealed that when we force our brains to master new ideas, learn a new language, or understand a new concept, we create new connections in the brain which can then be used to create other thought-patterns and expand our mental possibilities. Creating new active brain connections can counteract the effect of having lost connections through the build-up of the amyloid protein which is thought to be a cause of Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia. There are many different activities which create these new brain connections. Going dancing, doing the crossword, learning a new language, and playing brain training games have all been highlighted as good for the brain. But Jewish seniors have another option. Learning Talmud (made up of the Gemara and the Mishna, and often used as a term interchangeably with ‘Gemara’) can play an equally effective role in preventing Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia in Jewish baby boomers. According to Dr. Ben

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Keene, MRCPsych, Consultant Psychiatrist in London, UK, “The regular study of Gemara in a pair or group provides both social interaction and cognitive exercise. There is evidence that both regular cognitive activity and social engagement are neuro-protective.” It is now well-known that South Korea encourages their children to learn Talmud in order to sharpen their brains. Their logic, that since Jews are smart, and Jews learn Talmud, therefore learning Talmud will make South Koreans smart too, is still untested. However, if they keep it up into old age, South Korea will probably be very successful at reducing dementia.

the (usually unstated) arguments force the brain to create new neural pathways and boost one’s powers of analysis. 4. Boosting Expressiveness and Speed of Thought: The powerful impact that learning Talmud has on pushing off the onset of dementia and sharpening the brain is enhanced by the fact that it is traditionally learned in chavrusa. In chavrusa learning, two people discuss, dissect, debate and really argue with each other in the course

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of coming to understand the meaning of a text. In the course of chavrusa learning, one’s flexibility of argument is increased as one responds to the other’s suggestions. Having to listen to the other person’s theories, and explain one’s own, stretch the fluency of expression and speed of thought. So, before you turn to Sudokus, online brain training games, or the crossword, think about starting - or re-establishing - a chavrusa in Gemara. It might just change your mind entirely!

4 WAYS THAT LEARNING GEMARA IS GOOD FOR BRAIN HEALTH IN JEWISH SENIORS 1. Sustaining Mental Effort: The Gemara is written as a combination of shorthand and a stream-ofconsciousness work, with millions of different, inter-connecting pieces of information encoded within it. Hundreds of commentaries and other Jewish works branch off of the Gemara, with references and ideas interwoven within them. To understand Gemara requires conscious, sustained mental effort, which is proven to increase brain connections and lower harmful amyloid depositions. 2. Learning a New Language: To learn the Gemara/Talmud, one needs to master a new language Aramaic - and hold it in mind, which is challenging even for Jewish seniors who are wellversed in classical Hebrew. Learning a new language has been shown to be extremely beneficial for preventing cognitive decline. 3. Creating New Neural Pathways: Jewish baby boomers who learn Gemara also need to remember several contradictory strands of debate, which exercises both the memory and the brain’s ability to consider two things in relation to each other. The logic and reason that is required to keep track of

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HEALTH & ADVICE

By Rabbi Bentzion Shafier

I’m Not Ready to ChaNge

he station that almost everyone in western civilization is tuned into is W.W.I.I. - FM or What’s In It For Me? W.W.I.I. - FM, however, isn’t just a wavelength or something that people occasionally listen to. It’s actually a lifestyle that we are trained in from birth. You see, from the moment that you arrived into this world, it’s been all about you. What do you need? What will serve you well? What’s best for you? As an infant, it was all about your schedule and your nap. When it was time for school, the first question your parents asked was, “What’s the best school for you?” Then came camp. Again, one focus: where would you gain the most? When it came time for high school, the criteria was which environment would be best for you? Where will you grow the most? Then came seminary and once again where would you flourish? And that’s pretty much the way life goes. What’s best for you, where will you gain the most, etc. And then you get married. And presto - the world changes. There’s someone else in the picture. Now, it’s not just where I want to go for Shabbos. She also has an opinion. It’s not just what color I think the living room should be painted. He also has feelings about it. Suddenly, there’s another human being who has his own set of needs and desires, a person who has her own wants and preferences. For most people, marriage is the first time in their lives that they actually have to take someone else into account. That’s not to say that you didn’t do things for others up till now. Of course, you were a good friend, and did favors for people, and helped out at home. But that’s the point - it was chesed, helping others, doing for others. Marriage is different. Your wife isn’t someone who you have to take into account sometimes. She’s someone who is there all the time. Your husband is not someone that you’re generously volunteering to help. It’s someone you have to take into consideration. All the time. And, out of nowhere, you find yourself sharing everything from toothpaste to vacations to home furnishings. From what time you go to sleep at night to which car you drive. And this other person doesn’t do things the way that you do.

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The adjustment is especially difficult because you marry someone from the opposite gender. It’s not until you get married that you begin to realize quite how different men and women really are. “He does everything, I mean everything, differently than I do…” “She cares so much about the smallest, pettiest things…” And suddenly you realize that the individual you are married to thinks differently and values different things than you do. It’s like he comes from a different planet. There is, however, a bigger part to this.

you like a particular trait or not. Marriage demands adjustment. But it’s not because “He’s so difficult,” or “She’s so demanding.” And it’s not because “He just does things to annoy me,” or “She just has to have her way all the time.” It’s because each person has a different nature, temperament and interests. HASHEM matches couples perfectly for their ultimate success. That success includes much growth and much change. If they both are willing to change, they will live together in peace and harmony. If they aren’t - they will suffer.

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And this is the sixth really dumb mistake that very smart couples make. They aren’t willing to change. And if you’re not willing to change, you’re not ready to get married. The Marriage Seminar, a 12-part comprehensive guide to a successful marriage, is available at the Shmuz.com. You can download it, listen online, or access it on the Shmuz APP - for Iphone and Android. CDs of the Marriage Seminar can be obtained by calling the Shmuz office at 866-613-TORAH (8672).

PART OF A SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE IS ABOUT GROWTH If you’ve ever been to an orthodontist, think back to when he first put spacers on your teeth and then tightened the wires on your braces. A day or two later, your entire mouth was sore. It was difficult to chew. It was difficult to talk. And it felt that way for a while. It hurt because the dentist was nudging your teeth to move. He was asking them to change position. And change often comes with pain. This is a good analogy for marriage. Before you were born, HASHEM chose the ideal person for you to share your life with, build your home with, and grow with. Growth doesn’t come easily. Often it’s your spouse’s very nature that forces you to change. It’s the fact that he’s so disorganized or that she’s always late. That he’s so self-conscious, and she’s always nervous. One thing is guaranteed - your spouse’s disposition, way of doing things, and attitudes will be different than yours. And you’re not going to change them. Many of us get uneasy with this. We’re comfortable in the zone we’re in. And now we are being asked to do things differently - and it’s not pleasant. Rather than accept it, we let out the battle cry, “She should change!” “Let him stop doing things that way, and the trouble will go away.” But that is exactly what it is: a cry that leads to a battle. Because these are things that can’t be changed. It’s part of who your spouse is. For your marriage to succeed, you have to be flexible enough to make room for him or her - whether

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Sheri Toiv… Cont. from Page 77 When we set out to communicate our own thoughts and feelings to another it’s important to avoid a similar pitfall; the expectation that others will mindread and intuitively know what we are thinking, feeling or needing. Sometimes we believe they can read it on our faces or through our body language. They can’t. Body language isn’t an exact science and people misread these messages regularly. If you want someone to know it, it is your responsibility to say it. If you want to avoid misunderstandings, say it and say it clearly. How many arguments end with one party saying, I had no idea that’s what you wanted…? Use direct language to deliver a clear picture of your thoughts, feelings or expectations. Being nice is important, but don’t let it get in the way of assertive, unambiguous expression. If you’ve followed the first three rules you have already established that you are caring and empathetic, that you value the relationship and are ready to hear people out. Now is not the time to speak in half-truths, or sugar coated niceties that don’t convey your ideas candidly. Take the time to express yourself and maintain confidence in yourself, your position and your opinions. You’ll find that people are apt to listen better and be more open to working with you when you speak confidently. Now, before Pesach, as families everywhere are preparing to spend lots of time together in close quarters, sharing time and resources and managing each other’s expectations, we would all save ourselves considerable frustration by reaching out to communicate with each other in new and improved ways. Keeping the relationship as the foremost priority, communicate your feelings and expectations clearly and with compassion, making sure you have the time for a real dialogue. And be mindful of body language and tone. Sheri Toiv, LMHC is a psychotherapist who maintains a private practice where she works with individuals, couples and adolescents to achieve greater satisfaction in their life and relationships. She can be reached at 917-332-7508 and at sheritoiv@gmail.com. For more information see her on the web at sheritoivlmhc.com

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I S R A E L

Pesach: Taking the Miskane Out of Am Yisroel By Dov Shurin

hat are you thinking when you declare, “And if The Holy One, Blessed be He, would not have taken us out of Egypt, then we, and our children, and our children’s children would still be slaves to Pharaoh in Egypt!” Are we saying these words to the children who just asked us 4 questions? When addressing children we tend to exaggerate. Is that why we’re making such an extreme statement, or do we really believe that we would, almost 3,000 years later, still be under the rule of an Egyptian leader, still titled ‘the Pharaoh?’ In the Kol Menachem Haggadah, this question is asked in the ‘Classical Question’ section. And quoting the Rebbe’s sefer, titled ‘Likutei Ta’amim U’Minhagim,’ the haggadah brings the Rebbe’s answer; that we are not saying that the SAME Pharaoh would still be alive, but that Egypt would still be the same superpower and the leader would still be called a Pharaoh. My kid was getting his tooth pulled the other day, and I questioned the dentist about this topic. He quoted Rav Kook z”l, who said that history is established by our Nation of Israel. Each of our National Journeys established history in its wake. I asked the dentist, smiling, “Jackie, are you sure you’re not just pulling teeth?” “No,” He quickly said. “When we were exiled from Spain in 1492, suddenly Turkey opened its border to us for the first time. History was being shaped!” “And,” we stated together, “Columbus discovered America in that same year, 1492!” “Right,” Dr. Jackie added, as he laid my son’s baby tooth on the dentist’s tray. “But Tatty,” my son asked through his numb and puffed up lips, “How was the Egyptian Exile different from ALL the other Exiles of our whole history?” A very good question, my son, and the

answer is that Pharaoh wanted the Jews to stay in Egypt for ALL TIME. He realized that Joseph, and his father, and the whole family of Israel, had been a blessing for his nation, and he must now do everything in his power to keep the Jews from leaving. Joseph purchased all the land, possessions, and even the people for the Pharaoh, in exchange for food. Yaakov Avinu blessed the Pharaoh that the Nile would overflow towards his feet, ending the famine and turning the Pharaoh into a deity. And Joseph added a ‘separation of church and state,’ making clear that the children of Israel, being a priestly family, wouldn’t be affected by the standard laws, and they would be able to sit and learn the Torah, even before it was actually given to us. But now Joseph and his brothers and the first generation had all died. And Pharaoh, worried that his blessing - the Jews - might leave, said to his advisers, “Hovu nis’chakma lo” - Let us deal wisely with THIS WISE NATION! Let us treat them all like a bunch of Josephs, deserving to run our money system. Pharaoh told the Jews, “We need you to build Arei Miskanos - Treasury Cities. Two cities: Pisom and Ramses.” What an honor, the Jews thought. But they were soon to learn a very hard lesson. They would soon become ‘MISKANIM!’ The same root word for ‘treasury’ is also the root word for people of ‘limited funds’ or Miskanim. Even the title of the most powerful bank in the world today, namely, The American Federal Reserve Bank, bears the word ‘reserve,’ meaning isolated. My father z”l used to teach us how dangerous money is. He said “The more money you have, the more you need; there’s just never enough.” The holy Rabeinu R’ Nachman once said that when the urge to worship idols left us, this urge didn’t disappear; it subtly

switched to an urge for money. This can help us understand why, with all their suffering, the Jews still did not want to leave Egypt. And after leaving, they were always looking back, thinking, “How good it was in Egypt! Why, Moshe, did you take us out?” After all the makkos, Moshe was able to answer them, “But Pharaoh kicked us out!” Otherwise, of their own free will they might never have left. So clearly, we can assume that if Hashem didn’t take us out, assisted by Pharaoh’s throwing us out, we would truly STILL BE THERE! Now we find ourselves in the USA, of which my holy Zaideh, Harav Yaakov Kamenetsky zt”l, once told me, “We see something in common, comparing the first Golus Egypt - with this, the last Golus - America. The similarity is in the Separation of Church and State! This allows us many privileges, which we also received in Egypt, during Joseph’s period!” To this I add that America is so inviting to the Jews, why would we ever leave? Why would we ever leave when the ‘Buck Stops Here?’ America too, says “Come, help us build cities, run the banks, the media is in your hands. Assimilation welcomes you to replace ‘missing bricks’ with your children intermarrying.” And we see that we’ve become MISKANIM because the more money you have, the more you lack! And even if you are WISE, you have a PH.D. and you know the Torah, you may find that your children still do not properly respect you. Why? Let me end with what a brilliant Torah scholar once told me, after meeting my holy Grandfather. He said, “Your Zeideh explained to me the pshat in the posuk in Koheles(chapter 9) “Chuchmas Ha’Miskane B’zuya,” - the wisdom of a poor person is scorned. Your grandfather asked, “If a wise man speaks wisely, why should it be scorned?” And then he answered his own question: This posuk is speaking about the children of a wise man! No matter how wise he may sound, his family scorns him if he doesn’t have the means to ‘keep up with the Joneses!” Therefore, no matter how wise we may be now, or how wise our MISKANE forefathers were in Egypt, our PEH SACH - meaning the MOUTH TELLS - must be relative to our leaving the bondage of worshipping the BUCK! A kosher, freilichen Pesach to all! dovshurin.com

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CONTROVERSY

TODAY’S TOPIC: Mishing on Pesach The minhag not to “mish” on Pesach stems from where and for what purpose? And what constitutes mishing? Dovid HaMelech: Due to the various minhagim between families, as related to how to conduct Pesach, what to eat, et cetera, (which are of much greater variance than the rest of the year) it is a common minhag (itself) not to mix (or mish) so as not to have to break one’s own Pesach minhagim. Adorable: Mishing means eating anything that was made outside of your home, including store-bought products. Avram in MD It sounds like a minhag that can spare some hurt feelings. It prevents the situation of Reuven Lo-Gebrokts turning down an invite from Shimon Gebrokts, but accepting an invite from Levi Kol-haChumros, hurting Reuven’s feelings in the process. We personally do invite and get invited for Pesach meals. If we feel that questions need to be asked, we ask them openly. Health: You can buy products made by companies, and that isn’t mishing. Not eating manufactured stuff is a different chumra. Not mishing started because of so many different minhagim and it’s nearly impossible to find someone who does exactly the same as you. Instead of grilling other people about their minhagim, if they invite you to a meal, people just said “I don’t mish” and it solves a lot of problems. (That’s my version of mishing.) Shticky Guy: People today are machmir for no reason. They try to be frummer than the next guy. The first Belzer Rebbe did not brok. His mother did. They ate soup from the same plate, with his mother eating the kneidlach and he leaving them for her. Who would do such a thing now? I guess the Belzer Rebbe was not frum…

Sam2: This might be the saddest minhag I have ever heard of. Goodbye “Kol Dichfin Yeisei V’yeichol.” Big deal: sam2: Not mishing is a chumra people keep for themselves. It does not mean that they don’t invite other guests. I know plenty of people who would not eat at others’ on Pesach but have plenty of needy people at their own table. Stuck: I have a great uncle, an emes tzadik, who only eats food his rebetzin prepares ALL year round. Cherrybim: Everyone mishes to some degree today. Yitzchokm: Cherrybim: What makes you say so? I don’t. Cherrybim: Yitzchokm: If you use any product that isn’t produced in your own kitchen from scratch; that is mishing. Think first: Every year in my home the afikomin goes mishing; then we find it! Shticky Guy: LOL! Yesh, in our houshe alsho, we get a little drunk at sheder night. Or were you referring to those who take their teeth out for matzah?

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Bygirl93: It’s because of kashrus!! That is the original reason for no mishing. No one knew what other people did in their kitchens and to avoid embarrassment, they all just said they don’t “mish” - especially because many people have extra chumros on Pesach. It’s a minhag that is still followed a lot, and if it’s your minhag not to mish and you do, you have to be mater neder beforehand because you are taking away a chumra - unless your husband’s family does mish, in which case you are simply accepting his minhagim.

I heard the following directly from the person in the story: He was a talmid of Rav Pam. He and other talmidim went to Rav Pam on Pesach. He was offered something to eat, which he declined because his minhag was not to mish. He started getting ribbed for not eating in Rav Pam’s house. Rav Pam told the person to not chepper this bochur, because his minhag is legitimate. He also offered a reason. He said that not eating chametz on Pesach requires Mazel, and your own Mazel you have no choice but to rely on, but why do you have to rely on others’ Mazel?

WolfishMusings: We eat out at other people’s homes and they come to us as well. I understand that one of the reasons for not mishing on Pesach is that there are so many different legitimate minhagim and chumros on Pesach that people don’t have all year, so it is very likely your friend or neighbor has certain Pesach customs that are not in accordance with your own. If so, then they’re welcome to tell me so when I invite them. I won’t be offended if they tell me “I’m sorry, our minhag is not to eat by others on Pesach. Can we take a raincheck?”

Yekke2: The way I understand it, the minhag comes about as a result of various stringencies accepted in different households over Pesach. I don’t use some ingredients that you do; you don’t use some ingredients that I do. Some differences are famous - eg. gebrokts, kitniyos, garlic, chickens; others are more personal. Some people won’t use chocolate in their products on Pesach. Some people won’t use anything they cannot produce themselves. In my mother’s family, they wash every piece of meat/fish before beginning any work; thus eliminating any processed meats or minced products. Most people I know don’t do that. Some people rely on hechsherim that others don’t (not necessarily because they are more or less frum, but because the Rabbi I follow advised me against it and his Rabbi didn’t). As a result of that, I might not want to eat in your house on Pesach, due to suspicions that your cooking doesn’t fit exactly with my kashrus requirements. (Not standards, requirements.) That could be solved by discussing everything properly, but (a) people get offended that you question them, (b) if you go to some but not to others, you will end up offending those whom you turn down. Therefore, people make a blanket rule not to eat in other people’s houses over Pesach. Is this so terrible?

LanderTalmid: Chazal were misaken that during Yom Tov an am haaretz has the status of a talmid chacham regarding being trustworthy about certain areas of tumah and tahara (kol yisroel chaveirim baregel) in order to allow people to eat with each other and create achdus in Yerushalayim. (Ir shechubrah loh yachdav) I don’t want to bash minhagim, but this should be mentioned. Sam2: This thread depresses me every year. Yekke2: Sam2: You honestly don’t understand the concept of not mishing? Not mishing and not inviting guests are, of course, two separate things. We don’t mish (except for very close family), but we have guests almost every meal on Yom Tov! Cherrybim: If you can’t trust your own Rav’s kashrus on Pesach or your relative’s kashrus on Pesach, then what is the reason for trusting them when it’s not Pesach (such as shalach manos on Purim or eating at simcha events)? Joseph: Cherrybim: Indeed I know people who will never eat food that is not prepared in their own house - year-round. (Not even in relatives’ homes.) On Pesach things are much more complex and there are many more minhagim and stringencies in food preparation and acceptability that some people have and others don’t, so it makes even more sense to take this precaution.

mik5: From Shulchanaruchharav Website: It is stated in the name of the Alter Rebbe: “On Pesach one does not invite others to eat and drink; however, it is permitted for one to take on his own.” This means that the host is not to offer or pressure others to eat his foods on Pesach, as perhaps he (the guest) is stringent regarding this food. However, from the perspective of the guest there is no issue in eating another person’s food if he so chooses. Furthermore, a host is to make his food available for guests that desire to eat from his foods. Nevertheless, some are accustomed not to eat at other people’s houses, or partake in other people’s foods, throughout Pesach.

Ubiquitin: Joseph: Are those people Open Orthodox? To be so meikel regarding giving people neemanus and chezkas kashrus… I love kulos as much as the next guy. But being meikel to the point of not eating by anyone ever? That is far too lenient. Cherrybim: It does not mean that they don’t trust their Rav. It means their minhag is not to eat out of the house on Pesach.

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1. Simchas Hachaim 5 - Aderet 2. Kol Haderech - Mordechai Schapiro - Aderet 3. Yamim Baim - Shuky - Aderet

1. We Are a Miracle - Yaakov Shwekey - Aderet 2. Not Shayach - Shloime Daskal - Nigun 3. Yiddish Nachas - Yossi Green - Nigun

1. We Are a Miracle - Yaakov Shwekey - Aderet 2. Thankful - Shalsheles Jr. 3 - Aderet 3. Simchas Hachaim 5 - Aderet

APRIL 2016 1. Yiddish Nachas - Yossi Green - Nigun 2. Ah Nekidele - Michoel Schnitzler - Nigun 3. A Gitte Hartz - Yonasan Schwartz

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1. Thankful - Shalsheles Jr. 3 - Aderet 2. Not Shayach - Shloime Daskal - Nigun 3. We Are a Miracle - Yaakov Shwekey - Aderet

1. Simchas Hachaim 5 - Aderet 2. Yiddish Nachas - Yossi Green - Nigun 3. We Are a Miracle - Yaakov Shwekey - Aderet

1. Not Shayach - Shloime Daskal - Nigun 2. We Are a Miracle - Yaakov Shwekey - Aderet 3. Kol Haderech - Mordechai Schapiro - Aderet

1. Twins from France Cholent - Aderet 2. The Golem to the Rescue 3. Siam and I - Regal Productions

1. Mali - Malky Weingarten - Nigun 2. Siam and I - Regal Productions 3. Twins from France Cholent - Aderet

1. Twins from France Cholent - Aderet 2. Siam and I - Regal Productions 3. Maharal and the Golem of Prague

APRIL 2016 1. Imgloiblach - Nigun 2. Catch a Butterfly - Teck Productions 3. Wishes - Nigun

IMPORTANT NOTE 1. Siam and I - Regal Productions 2. Wishes - Nigun 3. Catch a Butterfly - Teck Productions

1. Siam and I - Regal Productions 2. Wishes - Nigun 3. Twins from France Cholent - Aderet

1. The Golem to the Rescue 2. Mali - Malky Weingarten - Nigun 3. Siam and I - Regal Productions

These ratings are supplied by the 7 major Jewish music outlets listed here, based on their actual sales over the last thirty days in the Greater New York area. The list does not reflect total sales of any DVD. It does not include sales in other stores, cities or countries (Israel!). The list is designed to be an indication of whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s currently popular in New York. Although every effort has been made to ensure fairness and accuracy, this list is published for entertainment purposes only and Country Yossi Family Magazine is not responsible for any inaccuracies or misrepresentations. 97

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H U M O R

Pesach InnovatIon

here’s an old adage that people of every generation inevitably repeat. It goes something like this: “Remember when we were young, politicians were honest and housing was affordable?” There are some things that always change and some things that just never do. For instance, talking about the past in a wistful manner is one of those things that never change. While looking back at the past, clearly many things have changed, yet in many cases it is merely our perspective of the past that has changed the most. All of this notwithstanding, each and every year you can count on being thoroughly and completely surprised by what you will find at the store when you do your Pesach shopping. Every year, cunning retailers will break their heads and stay awake for days thinking up sly new ways for boosting their revenue during the Pesach shopping season. These enterprising entrepreneurs will come up with new ideas for unique products to hock to the consumer for Pesach. As the Yom Tov approaches, store owners along each avenue in Boro Park are seen running around all over town performing intense research on what unmet needs the people of the neighborhood possess. Deep meaningful conversations will be held with people of all ages and walks of life, regardless of race, creed or color as long as they hail from Boro Park. These shopkeepers will spend much precious and valuable time in the local shuls, mikvahs, kollelim and batei din observing and schmoozing up the people in the hopes of coming up with the next master idea to present to the community. Some of these products will be designed completely brand new from the ground up, while other times these ideas will be mashups or re-appropriations of other ideas. Sometimes it won’t even be a new product but rather some new service designed to make your life easier for Pesach. There are so many different directions and

paths for the creative mind to take this year to bring their ideas to fruition. Here are some of the winning product ideas to be introduced to the community for Pesach this season. This year’s top new product is the Pillow-kittel - or Pittel. Instead of having to wear a kittel and lean on a separate pillow during the seder, this product puts them both together in one. By utilizing Boro Park’s best seamstresses to sew a seder pillow directly into the kittel, you can effectively have both mitzvahs accomplished with one single product. The beauty of this is that you can be yotzei the mitzvah not only when you are sitting but even when you are walking around. This product is expected to be this year’s top seller. Another amazing new Pesach product to be introduced this year is the magic matzah. The magic matzah is so simple yet so useful. The magic matzah is made from genetically modified wheat that instantly softens and melts upon any human contact. This is extremely helpful for those with gastro-intestinal issues. A fringe benefit of the magic matzah is that you no longer need to hide the afikomen. All you have to do is touch the matzah and - poof - it just melts and disappears. Here’s another winning new product that store owners will be putting out this year. The retractable kos. This special becher, which was actually invented by the president of the Boro Park Kiddush Club, is easily made larger or smaller according to your alcohol tolerance levels. As you progress with the four cups of wine at the seder and you start feeling uneasy on your feet, you just collapse your becher according to your liking. An invisible layer inside the becher will allow you to shrink your kos up to a quarter of its capacity without anyone knowing the difference. This way you can have less alcohol yet still brag about how much you had to drink at the seder. It’s a win, win situation for everyone. Another amazing idea this year is the seder clock. This clock works almost like

any ordinary clock except that it moves twice as fast. This way the next morning, when you go to shul and everybody brags about what time they finished their seder, you are sure to be the winner. This product has already received thousands of advance orders. Order yours now while you still have time. One of the most original and innovative new products, however, is the ‘Faltche Pesach Cookbook.’ This is a most complete tome with an eclectic series of special Pesach recipes, most of which have been handed down mother to daughter for thousands of years since the exodus from Egypt. What is special about all of these recipes, however, is that every single dish is completely and unequivocally faltch. That is that every recipe in the book is actually a fake version of what it is really supposed to be, all dishes made with only one single ingredient - potatoes. By making everything faltch and staying away from the real stuff, so many serious sheilos and kashrus problems can be avoided. Sometimes these ideas don’t always work out as expected. At times the best ideas come out from the biggest flops of the previous year. Take for instance the idea of the kneidel-former. Most people thought this would be a best seller for gebroktz on acharon shel Pesach. As it turns out, however, demand just wasn’t high enough to warrant a flight to China for production of this product. This year, however, the same product is being reintroduced as a macaroon-former. It is already receiving rave reviews for creating the most perfectly shaped macaroons ever. There are so many new products hitting the shelves this year for Pesach. One Boro Park resident is actually in talks now for creating an ‘As Seen on Pesach’ store to showcase all of these products. So while there are so many important things to do for Pesach this year, don’t forget that demand is high and supply is never enough. So run out and get your special Pesach products this year, lest you end up coming home empty-handed with nothing but borscht and schmaltz to drown your sorrows in. Chaptzem is a heimishe blogger that authors the Chaptzem Blog, the most popular heimishe website. The Chaptzem Blog has been quoted many times in the mainstream media and is viewed by thousands daily. www.chaptzem.blogspot.com

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H U M O R Precious Cargo A wealthy woman from California telephones El Al Airline requesting a firstclass ticket for her dog. The airline attendant is astonished and promptly advises the lady that she cannot have a seat for her dog. The lady is very upset, but at the end of the discussion the airline attendant agrees to personally carry the pampered poodle in a suitable cage on the plane. The plane lands in Israel and the service people remove the cage, they notice to their horrified surprise that the poodle is dead. They immediately dispatch someone to fetch another poodle which looks the same as the demised dog. They happily hand over the cage to the lady who looks at the cage and flatly rejects it on the ground that: “This is not my dog!” The airline personnel are surprised - they thought the substitute poodle looked like an exact match, whereupon the lady replies: “My dog was dead and I was taking her to Israel to be buried.” R.F. Williamsburg

Credit for the Cake

WHICH SIDE OF THE

arrived at the sale (late as usual), my attractive cake had already been sold. I was beside myself! A couple of days later, I was invited to a friend’s home for a vort. You can just imagine my horror when there, prominently displayed on the table, was my gorgeous cake! And to top it off, they were about to start slicing it! I jumped out of my chair to rush into the kitchen to tell my hostess all about it, but before I could get to my feet, one of the other ladies said, “What a beautiful cake!” Then I heard the hostess (a prominent shul member) say, “Thank you. I baked it myself.” I sat back down, smiled to myself and waited! S.L. STREET? Flatbush

ne winter morning a couple heard over the radio there was going to be 8 to 10 inches of snow that day. “Cars must be parked on the right side of the street, so that snowplows can get through.” The blonde wife goes out and moves her car. A week later - the same announcement, only this time it was the left side of the street. The wife goes out and moves her car again. The next week the radio announcer says, “We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park…” Then the power goes out. The wife says, “Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snowplows can get through?” With the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are married to blondes exhibit, the husband says, “Why don’t you just leave it in the garage this time?”

I was asked to bake a cake for the shul’s ladies’ auxiliary bake sale, but I forgot to do it until the last minute. I baked an angel food cake and when I took it from the oven, the center had dropped flat. I said, “Oy vey, there’s no time to bake another cake.” So, I looked around the house for something to build up the center of the cake. I found it in the bathroom - a roll of toilet paper. I plunked it in and cov-

ered it with icing. The finished product looked beautiful, so I rushed it to shul. I then gave my daughter some money and instructions to be at the sale the minute it opened, and to buy that cake and bring it home. When my daughter

What is Your Name A gabbai approaches a guest in the shul and says, “I want to give you an aliyah. What is your name?” The man answers, “Esther bas Moshe.” The gabbai says, “No, I need your name.” “It’s Esther bas Moshe,” the man says. “How can that be your name?” The man answers, “I’ve been having serious financial problems, so everything is in my wife’s name.” F.B. Boro Park

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H U M O R

“

it. I look at him like he’s crazy. What’s them do all the climbing while they don’t know - something is there not to like? Every suit looks exshout up orders from below. “Two over very wrong. I just came actly alike, especially from a distance. to the left - three over to the right. No! across my husband’s list of Granted, if you take it outside in the Not that one. Yeah! That’s the one!” things to do for Pesach. Are sunlight one may have a white, red or The boy climbs down, the mother inyou ready for this! blue pinstripe, but 1. Buy Matin the closet, they zohs. all look alike! That’s it! He ANOTHER KAYL A CL ASSIC By mistake, I has nothing else once gave my to do! husband’s new I have the suit away with the cleaning, the old clothing and food shopping, he ended up the shlepping of wearing his old the clothes to and suit - I never told from the shatnes him and he never lab, the hemknew the differming, the cookence. Just goes to ing, shopping for prove my point. clothes for the I told my son kids, etc., etc., that we’re buying etc. the suit and that’s What would that! Then who be so terrible if should we meet HE took the on the way out? BOYS for None other than clothes? No my husband. He that’s my job too! decided he needSo after a whole ed a new suit for day of working in Pesach. the house, I still I made an have to shlep out about-face and at night because headed for the that’s when the rear of the store. boys get home Too my utter disbelief, he stopped at spects it and in three seconds flat gives from yeshiva. Farshtaytzach, the store the rack size that he was when we got a p’sak, “No good” and she sends him was packed. Never fails. The size I married and tried on a suit. The button back up. This could go on for hours. need is always at the rear of the store. on the jacket couldn’t close. The pleat By the time she finds something that I want to meet the person that made up in the back was spread wide open and SHE likes, her son is totally wiped out the rule that the racks start out with the then he asked me, “How does it look?” and dropped at least 5 pounds. smaller sizes first and you work your I burst out laughing, told him he But my boys are too young to way up. Why can’t you start with the looked like a nerd and suggested he climb up the ladder, so I end up doing large sizes and work your way down? visit the “portly” department, considit myself. This is no mean feat considI went into a store recently and if ering he put on 50 pounds since our ering I suffer from “vertigo.” I tell you I walked an entire avenue wedding. Needless to say, he didn’t apI finally find something for my block before I got to the size I needed, preciate that. By evening’s end he had sons to try on but have no idea if it fits I would not be exaggerating. bought two beautiful suits (they both properly. So we start walking around Then the fun really began. Either I looked the same to me) in the “portly” the store looking for a salesman. Ten had to climb up a ladder because the department (on the salesman’s suggesminutes later, I spot him in front of the size suit that I needed was hanging on tion). store. He takes a look at my son, gives a rack three inches from the ceiling, or As we headed home, he turned toa little pull here, a little tug there - “Try I ended up sitting on the floor because ward me and said “Kayla, this year, the next size.” the suits were hanging from a rack please be careful not to give my NEW So, we walk all the way back. We made for midgets. suits away with the old clothes.” finally find a suit that fits and my son Of course, you have those mothGulp!!! has the nerve to tell me he doesn’t like ers that come with older sons and let

K ay l a Kuchle f fe l AH POIFECT FIT!

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Chesed… Continued From Page 36 With space at a premium in Orthodox and Chassidic neighborhoods, every year families discard chametz or safek chametz before Pesach. Sometimes the food goes to the hired help. More often, though, it winds up wasted; hauled away by overworked sanitation workers. This is a shame, observes Mr. Relkin. “The groceries - many, non-perishable - could have just as easily been accepted by families who are struggling financially and will gladly take them, particularly if somebody else is offering to store them during the week of Pesach.” Once out of earshot from his children, the “yungerman” confides in Mr. Relkin about the financial challenges he’s confronting; ones that are looming larger than past years. There’s a new daughter, cutbacks at work, higher healthcare premiums and even higher food prices. Mr. Relkin shows him 140 triple and quadruple stacked boxes containing flour, pasta, cereal, rice, beans, condiments, canned goods, drinks of all types, along with spices and other cooking ingredients. When the children see the boxes labeled “nosh” and “Shabbos treats” their eyes light up. Immediately they begin lobbying. “Tatty, can we choose some?” they ask in Yiddish. The yungerman wants to be sympathetic - you can see it in his eyes but he pauses to contemplate the entreating. He tenderly says no, focusing instead on food basics. He takes an empty box and, with his children’s help, begins filling it with various pastas - and even thirty pounds of flour. “Sometimes, even when people are in need,” explains Mr. Relkin, “they still feel guilty about taking away resources from others in even greater need than themselves.” When people come over, they only do so one at a time so they can have their privacy and not, chas v’shalom,

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be embarrassed, Mr. Relkin stresses. Yes, a very different - and worthy - form of chesed, indeed.

on the right side of the house. Accepting donations till the day of b’dikas chametz.

Flatbush Chametz Gemach: Between Purim and Pesach, the gemach accepts non-perishable, sealed-container chametz and sells it. After Pesach, the food is distributed to people in need. Also accepting donations to purchase supplies or extra food. Generally flexible hours; call before coming; if no one available to accept packages, leave donations by the side door

Contact: Yitzchak Relkin 1101 East 3rd Street (I/J) (718) 377-6361 Email: yitzchak@relkin.com (“Chametz Gemach” in subject line) Binyamin L. Jolkovsky, veteran Chareidi journalist, is Editor in Chief of the popular JewishWorldReview.com

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YITZCHAK WEISSMAN ..................................(347) 522-3272 ................................12

KAUFMAN’S DESIGN JEWELRY ..................(718) 871-3575 ................................15

YOSSI NEUMAN ONE MAN BAND................(718) 483-5092 ................................70

KOBY’S TRANSPOTOURS INC.....................(800) 872-5629 ................................46

YOUR TOP PRIORITY ....................................(718) 853-1576 ................................13

KOL SIMCHA ..................................................(800) 336-7848 ................................45

ZELDA’S ART WORLD ...................................(718) 377-7779 ................................63

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