Nobody teaches you how to console families, especially in a situation like this, so you have to improvise. Sometimes their situations are so sad and you really feel for them. I would think to myself: If I was that person, what would I want For seven months I someone to say, or what would I need? Sometimes I would just listen, because words were not enough, and they didn’t see my parents, just needed to feel like someone was there for them, because both are at-risk, which made them feel better. Feeling listened to and understood helped them more than words. Yet you had as they have cancer. to console them whilst social distancing, and that is I preferred not to see difficult. I would hug you if I could, but I can’t. But I am them because I love here. Nobody prepares you for such a time, for such them. It was hard. a huge health crisis. Your emotions are complicated. Sometimes you say to yourself: Marcela in room 540 could be my mother and she is going through this. It is really shocking. You cry afterwards because you don’t want to make things worse - you are there to help. But it’s difficult, and it gets to us all. Even though it is hard, I have enjoyed this role, although there are things I didn’t know, but the experience has helped me develop. Midwives have some autonomy and this prepares you for decision making, which you have to do constantly in this crisis. On a personal note, it was quite difficult to leave my daughters 24-hours a day. I did all my work at the hospital and during my breaks, I had to express milk, because my little one was allergic to milk protein, so I couldn’t stop giving her breast milk. My husband was massively supportive. He told me he would look after the girls. He is a dentist and at the beginning he couldn’t open his surgery. He was with them for the first month. Then he was able to go back to work and my cleaner helped with the girls. She and my husband were a tremendous help. My 4 year old daughter found it difficult not having mama there at night. I usually lie down with them and read them a story. The littlest one cried a lot before going to sleep, but my husband was able to give her lots of comfort. When I got home, I had been awake for 24-hours, but I would take a shower and start the day playing with my daughters. At the end of such a long period of time awake, I was very tired. For seven months I didn’t see my parents, because both are at-risk, as they have cancer. I preferred not to see them because I love them. It was hard not to have them there for me, and my daughters didn’t really understand why they couldn’t see their grandparents. It was tough, but it was a good opportunity, because it has helped
78
SANTIAGO — CHILE
Bearing witness to a pandemic BUPA | SANITAS
me get where I am today, a supervising midwife with shifts that suit me much better and no more night shifts. At the clinic we are getting ready for the second wave. Someone said, we are going back into this really difficult situation, perhaps with a different perspective but also perhaps more tired, because we all had such a big shock. The biggest impact it has had on healthcare workers is stress. We are exhausted. Some people still can’t see their family, and that is very stressful, because family are often your support circle, and the people you would normally count on. I am grateful for the experience of working with really good teams who gave 200% of themselves to help us through this crisis. I confirmed that midwifery is what I love, especially as I got to work in management. I think I was able to make a contribution. �
79
