This book is intended to provide motivational and informational content to inspire personal growthandpurpose-drivenliving.Theexperiences,opinions,andinsightssharedarethoseofthe authorandarebasedonhisownjourneyandperspectives.Thisbookisnotintendedasasubstitute forprofessionaladvice,beitmedical,Rnancial,orother. eadersareencouragedtoseekappropriate professionalguidanceforanyspeciRcconcerns.Theauthorandpublisherdisclaimanyliabilityfor risksorlosses,personalorotherwise,incurredasaresultoffollowingthesuggestionsprovidedin thisbook.
Acknowledgement
Iwouldliketothankthefollowingindividuals:
MyBestRoleModels:
Myparents:
Mr.SihKiaChoon,John
Mdm.ChuaKweeEng,Mary
MyGreatestInspiration:
Mydaughters:
ClarissaSih
ClarabelleSih
MyMentors:
Mr.SamChoo
Mr.NicholasTan
MyFavouriteTeachers:
Mrs.RoseLiu
Mr.E.Joseph
Mr.JosephDeCruz
MyIdol:
Mycousin:CharlesSih
Foreword by Sam Choo
When I joined the Toastmasters movement over 20 years ago, I had the privilege of meeting John Sih, who became my public speaking mentor. John was instrumental in helping me establish the Simei Toastmasters Club,andhisguidanceleftanindeliblemarkonmyjourney.Today,itis myhonourtoreciprocatebycontributingtothissigni:cantmilestonein hislife’thepublicationofhisbook.
xislifestoriesresonatedeeplywithmyown,ignitingadesirewithinmeto documentmyeOperiencesaswell.I:rmlybelievethateveryonehasastory worth telling. ;ur life eOperiences hold invaluable lessons, and sharing themcaninspireandupliftothers.
This book is more than just a collection of lessonsE it is a model for us alltoemulate.—achchapteroMersinsightsdrawnfromlivedeOperiences, remindingusthatthereisalessontobefoundineverymoment,whether joyfulorchallenging.
Tothereaders,Iencourageyounotonlytoabsorbthewisdominthisbook butalsotoconsiderwritingyourownlifestories.Sharethemwithfriends and loved ones it is a powerful way to impact others while preserving yourlegacyforfuturegenerations.
It is my sincere wish to share these principles with you, so that they positivelyimpactyourlifeaswell!Ihopethatsomeofmyexperienceswill resonatewithyours.
Ibelievethatitisimperativetokeepgrowing,learning,andprogressing, tolivelifetothefullest.Equallyimportantistoknowthatyouarespecial! Youareblessedwithuniquetalents.Itismyintentiontohelpyoudiscover your talents, hone them, and help others with them. 2nce you develop thesetalents,youwilldeveloppassion.Thenyoucan ass–I–2n!You willbegintoinspireotherstodothesame–passingapartofyourselfon toothers.
Lesson 1: Start to Be Great (Part 1)
"You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great."–ZigZiglar
Back in 1996, I took a similar leap of faith. I started my training and consultingbusinesswithnotraining,noqualiAcation,andnoexperience intheAeld.TogainexposureandbuildmyconAdence,Igavefreetalksat librariesandcommunitycentresaroundtheisland.2sIlookbackonmy 8j-yearzourney,Ifeelanimmensesenseofprideandgratitude.HadInot followedmyheartandstartedbackthen,Iwouldn’tbewhereIamtoday. Istartedwithnothing,butnowIamrich–richwithfriendshipsforged, experiences to share, success stories to tell, and the profound realiYation thatgreatnessbeginsbysimplystarting.
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Lesson
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fmovessionkp sfekdem, I wks kcjisec to be k sfegikpist mkthem thkn .lst k uenemkpistS!fegikpiststenctohkjeaomegmecibipitykncekmnaomeT’hktqs whenIsktaysepvcownkncksdecaysepvwhktIsholpcsfegikpiseinS’hkt -lestionfmoaftecsoaesolpxsekmghinukncnktlmkppypecaetobegoainu ksfegikpistingoaalnigktionsdippstmkininuS
ow is the tiae to stkmt ksdinu -lestionsS lst pide k sdippec intemjiewem, pekmn to ksd -lestions to sopigit kpp the invomaktion yol neec knc wknt—slbtpy,saoothpy,kncfmovessionkppyT
I was driving with my two daughters sitting in the back seats, chatting abouttheimportanceofbeingNo.1inlife,whenmyelderdaughterasked me, “Daddy, if I am your No.1 daughter, how about Mei Mei?” I was taken by surprise by that question. After composing myself, I replied, “Darling, you are my No.1 elder daughter, and Mei Mei is my No.1 youngerdaughter.”
I once conducted a seminar for a group of dental surgeons titled “The ImportanceofBeingNo.1.”Inthemiddleofmyseminar,aseniordoctor raised his hand and asked, “What’s wrong with being No.2, or No.3? WhymustIbeNo.1?Isn’titverystressfulhavingtochaseaftertitlesand positions?”
Asatrainingconsultant,myaimistoestablishinmyparticipants’minds that: “John Sih is the No.1 trainer compared to others I’ve met. He’s professional,entertaining,knowledgeable–asubjectmatterexpert.Ilike hisapproach;he’shumble,humorous,andhisclassesareinteractiveand fulloffun!”
Not necessarily because I’m the best (being the best is subjective), but becauseIamtheir6rstchoice.Becauseofthat,Igetmanyclientswhogive merepeatbusiness–andthat’sveryimportantforme!
Lesson
It is imperative that we establish ourselves as No.1, especially with our lovedones,relatives,colleagues,valuedclients,andclosestfriends.
IfmydaughtersdonotregardmeastheirNo.1daddy,Iwouldlosealltheir love and respect for me! Therefore, working relentlessly to maintain my statusastheirNo.1daddyismytoppriority.
Howaboutyou?WhatareyouNo.1at,andwhoareyouNo.1to?
Action
Make a decision now to determine who is most important to you and beginworkingonearningyourplaceastheirNo.1.Yourspouse,children, relatives,businesspartners,superiors,peers,subordinates,closefriends?
From 1988 to 1996, I worked as a cnanliav ad.isorT bo ue sfllesspfv, I needed to ue more lom–etent and ejelti.e ; not !fst a –ropessionav savesmanH I needed to ue a –ropessionav in saves? qow did I alhie.e thisg I needed toovs, and I needed to alyfire skivvsT I attended avv the trainin: lofrses a.aivauve in mW lom–anW, –artili–ated in saves seminars, uof:ht uookstoread,a––ointedsavesmentors,andhadrovemodevstoemfvateT qerearesomeopthe.avfauveti–sIrelei.ed,whilhIstivvfsetodaWO
6T“e a saves –ropessionav, not an order”takerT brfe savesmanshi–ue:inswhenWofr–ros–eltsaWs,75o,IGmnotinterested?EbhatGs whenWofr–owerop–ersfasionkilksinT
UT3o:ilo–ensa–ersonGsmindTAmotiono–ensthewavvet?
8TA.erW save has c.e oustalvesO 5o need, no moneW, no hfrrW, no desire,notrfstTFindawaWarofndtheseoustalvesandveadthem tothelvoseT
Lnle Wof alyfire the art op sevvin: Wofrsevp, Wof lan meet anWone, wavk intoanWlom–anWoror:anisation,inanWsitfation,atanW–valeoronanW ollasion, and en:a:e themT 4of wivv eRfde lrediuivitW, –ropessionavism, loncdenle,lharisma,andwinthemo.er?
I am li—e a mirrorC I have the apility to reBe.t pa.— to you whatever you send outC I .an get along with anyone, yet I .an see through ceocle and understandtheirtruemotivesCTheenvironmentdi.tateshowIpehaveCI .an read the energy around me and ad:ust a..ordinglyC I am always two stecsaheadjthat’smycowerC
Iecitomisewhat“ru.eLeeusedtosay”PBeformless,shapeless,likewater. Youputwaterintoacup,itbecomesthecup.Youputwaterintoabottle,it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot… water can flow,oritcancrash.Bewater,myfriend!-
I have learned to harness that cower and tea.h it to others through Gsy.ho™4eometri.sYCIt’sthes.ien.eofunderstandingceocleandtheart of.ommuni.atingwiththemC
I have a genuine interest in ceocleC I en:oy meeting them and instantly .onne.tingpystartingtoPscea—theirlanguageC-Thisispe.ausePpeople like people who are like themselvesC- I love ma—ing others feel good
apout themselves and derive great satisfa.tion from highlighting their talents,strengths,and.acapilitiesCIen:oypeingtheirmirrorC
Uext, develoc the apility to sceed™read the cersonality styles of those around youjyour scouse, .hildren, siplings, in™laws, friends, suceriors, supordinates, .ustomers, and .lientsC Dpserve and intercret their pody languageC
Hnderstand why some ceocle :ust P.li.—- with you while others do notC
It is a cra.ti.al tool to helc you understand your dominant pehavioural stylesandidentifythestylesofothers,esce.iallythosewhoare signib.ant inyourlifeCNoulearnthesestylesthroughshacesC
Gsy.ho™4eometri.sY will helc you puild long™lasting and meaningful win™winrelationshicsjpothso.iallyandcrofessionallyC
Learn how to ma—e ceocle li—e you py nurturing the .harisma withinyouC
“e.ome irresistiple in the eyes of your loved ones, relatives, .olleagues,andfriendsC
5eveloc a.ute sensitivity in fo.using on others’ strengthsjma—ingthemirresistipletoyouaswellC
The se.ret is to .ommuni.ate with aclomp through the art of Jhace ElexingC
This is my se.ret to su..ess, and it is my cleasure to imcart it to youC It might:ustpeyourtrumc.ard!
Iam:ustanemail,atext,ora.allawayC
@ohnJihC9mail”:sysih6gmailC.omC SG”83 83 K 2
Lesson 7: It’s OK to Be Kiasu!
"It’s not about being better than others; it’s about being better thanwhoyouwereyesterday."
Whatdoes"kiasu"meaninSinglish?
In Singlish, a colloquial language spoken in Singapore, kiasu describes a personwhoisoverlycompetitive,afraidofmissingout,orexcessivelyeager to win or stay ahead of others. The term originates from the Hokkien phrase,kiameaning"afraid"andsumeaning"lose."
Story
Why is it OK to be kiasu?There is Positive Kiasuism and Negative Kiasuism.
When we focus on honing our natural talents and skills, the process becomeslesspressuredandmorepleasurable.Aswedevelopourabilities, wecultivatethepassionneededtoexcel!
I have two daughters. I was actively involved in bringing up my elder daughter and deeply treasure the father-daughter bonding sessions we shared.Itookituponmyselftofetchhertoandfromschooleveryday.This savedheratleastanhouroftraveltimecomparedtotakingthebus.After pickingherup,wewouldhavedinnertogether,gowindowshopping,or
Sometimes, she would suddenly say, “Oh Daddy, I have homework to do,andit’sduetomorrow.”Shewouldthenbemotivatedtocompleteit withoutneedingareminder.Ideliberatelyencouragedhertoplay,easing thepressureofschoolwork,andshe,inturn,feltagreaterurgetostudy. Thisreversepsychologyworkedbeautifullyforus!
Ey daughter has always been athletic. She is also taller than her peers. Whenshestartedsecondaryschool,shenarroweddownherchoiceofCUA to either basketball or softball. The coach of the softball team saw her potentialandinvitedhertojoin. Lndertheguidanceofthemostinspiring coachI’veeverknown,herschoolemergedthechampions.
Ey daughter was taking 2 mathematics subjects - Additional Eath and Clementary Eath. After her “O” Fevel prelims, she felt it was way too muchtocope.WediscussedaboutitandshedecidedtodropAdditional Eath,withherteacher’sblessing.(inally,shepassedherClementaryEath at“O”levels!HerstrongestsubjectwasCnglish.Andsheloveswriting!
WhensheenteredPolytechnic,shequaliMedforDirectSchoolAdmission )DSA9. When she entered Lniversity, she was oYered the Wee Kim Wee
Scholarship. —es, Singapore’s Rth President was a journalist. (rom then on, she has been Mnancially independent. I’msuper proud of my elder daughter!
Apositivelykiasuparentwantstheirchildrentosucceed,butthey do so without piling on unnecessary pressure. Instead, they guide theirchildrenindiscoveringtheirtalents,capabilities,andpassions.Such aparenttakesanactiveroleindecision-makingandprovidesunwavering support. They avoid blame, criticism, or belittlement, choosing instead to encourage, praise, and empower their children. If things don’t go as planned,it’ssimplyanoutcome:achancetoreturntothedrawingboard and re-strategise together. This approach helps children handle setbacks positivelyandwithresilience.
Ey younger daughter majored in Cnglish Fanguage and Cnglish Fiterature.Sheisananimallover!Duringherschoolholidays,sheworked as a dolphin trainer at 3esorts World Sentosa. Her love for animals eventuallytookhertoKorea,whereshetrainedBelugawhales.
Now, she works with horses, employed by a company whose tagline is0 “Sometimes,ittakesananimaltomakeusabetterhuman.”Iamequally proudofmyyoungerdaughter!
Lesson
Being kiasu is part of our Singaporean identity:be proud of it! Be PositivelyKiasu!Byembodyingpositivekiasuismasaparent,youcanbea rolemodelforyourchildrentoadoptthesamemindset.Thisensuresthat both you and your children achieve success by maximising your natural talents and capabilities, while developing an unquenchable passion to excel.
goualsoyndthem!qaskinxpeopleclosetoqou:Whathaveqounoticed a!out what I can do !etter than others? What have qou o!served I do eRceptionallq well? gou can askyoursefH these Auestions too. Le-ect on theseAuestionsferventlqandoftenenouxhbandtheanswerwilleventuallq revealitselftoqouN gesNSuccess=Talent+Passion=Profession
Shin dou!le0ma5ored in piano and telecommunications. Howeverb in 2&11battheaxeof2&bhewasdiaxnosedwithcarpaltunnelsqndromein !othhands.Hehadtomakeachoice:PianoorMaxic.HechoseMaxicN
MisNostbotaAfepcco!:fism!entsL
1.2&17 F 2&1U Y,ppeared twice on Penn F Teller: 8ool ’sN and fooledthem!othtimesN
Shinisself0tauxhtNHelearntmostofhiscardtricks!qwatchinxgouTu!e and practised for eixht hours a daq. Todaqb he is the headline act at a lonx0termresidencqattheMiraxe“asinoHotelinjas”exas.
Shin jim discovered his talentb turned it into his passionb and made it his profession. He had two loves: Music and Maxic. He took the road less travelledb worked hard on his craftb and perfected it to entertainb mesmerisebandwowhisaudienceeverqtimeheperforms.
"iscover qour talentb nurture qour passionb turn it into qour professionb andshareitwithothers.That(showqouachievetruesuccessN
Iesson
’nderstandinxwhatqouarepassionatea!outcanhelpqouyndqourself and xive qour life direction. "iscoverinx qour passion is essential if qou wanttolivealifeylledwithpurpose.
Peleb Most Well0 nown 8oot!aller: 4Success is no accident. It is hardwork,perseverance,learning,studying,sacrificeand,mostof all,lovingwhatyouaredoingorlearningtodo.B
Charlesistheonlychildofmydad’sfourthbrother.Heisanintellectual andextremelysuccessful.Wewerebothbornin1961.Heusedtotopthe class, while I used to fail. He loved studying, while I loved playing. My granddad was a brilliant man. He gave both Charles and me tuition –in every subject! Charles would always complete his homework, while I wouldattendtuitionclasseswithoutdoingmine.Charleslookedforward totuition,whileIplayedtruant.Needlesstosay,Ihadtobearthebruntof mygranddad’sdisappointment.
At the age of 17, Charles had already obtained a Private Pilot Licence (PPL),takinghisproudparentsupforjoyridesinaCessna.Afterhis“A” Levels, Charles joined the Republic of Singapore Air Force (RSAF) as a Oghter pilot. I failed my “:” Levels, so I had to retake them. My mum cameuptomeandaskedY“?ourcousinCharleshasjoinedtheRSAFasa Oghterpilot.Whatareyougoingtodo4”
I knew my mum loved me. After all, I was one of her favourites, being the youngest son. I always wanted her to be proud of me! After the secondattempt,Iobtainedmyfull“:”LevelcertiOcate.Iappliedtobea OghterpilotintheRSAFbutwasrejectedbecauseIwastoldI’mpartially
Ifailedto5ualifyasamechanic,soIwasneverpromoted.Ifailedthesame exam seven times! Still, I had to serve the full seven years. I remained a Privateforsevenyears!Myincomeduringthosesevenyearswasameagre 0G3G.3G.
Forsevenyears,Ifeltlost,angry,helpless,resigned,anddejected.Ihated the RSAF, I hated my colleagues in 1qD S5uadron, and I hated Charles! ItoldmyselfthatifIwaseverpostedtohiss5uadron,Iwouldmakehis aircraftcrash!2errible,terriblethoughts.
Charles was promoted to Veneral, with his appointments including BeputyCommanderof2engahAirbaseandCommanderofPayaLebar Airbase, overseeing a few thousand soldiers! He retired as the Chief of Sta$,AirSta$.
We did not contact each other during our tenure in the RSAF. It lasted more than 1q years. I was too embarrassed, and I felt guilty. After both ofuscompletedourserviceintheAirForce,Isummonedthecourageto inviteCharlestodinner.ItoldhimhowIhatedbeingcomparedtohim.I explainedthatitwasnothisfaultandapologised.Heacceptedmyapology, andwehavebeenhavingregularmealssince.
?ou see, I was secretly admiring my cousin. He was a highTEier. He has alwaysbeenmyinspirationandrolemodel.Ilookeduptohimandtook himasmybenchmark.IconvincedmyselfthatIcouldbeassuccessfulas him.Afterall,wesharethesamegranddadandsurname!
My mum had never been to school, and the only way she knew how to motivate me was to compare me with Charles. She did it with the best intentions,butItookitveryhardandbecameverynegative.Ihadverylow selfTesteemandbelievedIwouldnevermakeitinlife.IthoughtIwould nevermakemymumproudbecauseIwasdestinedforfailure.
AfterleavingtheRSAFin19--,IjoinedAIAasaOnancialadvisor.Mylife started to turn around. I began to achieve. :ne of the best books I have ever read wasY 2hink and Vrow Rich by Napoleon Hill. Another book thatstartedmeonthepathtosuccessisY2hePowerofPositive2hinking byBrNormanJincentPeale.2heultimatebookthattrulychangedmy lifeisYCommunicating…eyond:urBi$erencesbyBrSusan .Bellinger.
In 1996, I started my own training consultancy business, specialising in interpersonalcommunicationskills.Ihaveneverlookedbacksince!
MumpassedoninqDDG.…eforeshepassed,Ioverheardhertellingoneof my auntsY “I don’t know what ohn does. He says he’s a trainer, but he doesn’ttraindogsorpeopleingyms.Hesayshe’sateacher,buthedoesn’t teachinschools. …utIknowthatwhenmysonJohnopenshismouth, peopleputmoneyinhispockets!”
Finally,MumunderstoodwhatIdo.
Lesson
All of us are blessed with talents that are special and uni5ue. Bon’t play yoursongstosomeoneelse’stune.Createyourownmelody,thenshareit withtheworld. ntertainotherswithyouruni5uebrandofmusic!
Special gifts and talents are blessings that children are born with. 2hese can manifest in noticeable areas, such as music, maths, technology, drawing,orsports.Lessnoticeablegifts,suchastheabilitytounderstand others’ feelings, caring for others, or even remembering past events and conversationsindetail,aree5uallyimportant.
Everyone has at least one thing they are great at.Asparents,youare the best people to help your children discover and develop their uni5ue giftsandtalents.
Lesson 10: 10 Ways to Love
“Let
the love you give come back and find a place in you.”
1. Listen without interrupting. I xnd this e,tremely di-cult to do! I tend to jump in and interruptW especially when I disagree with what the other person is saying. I once had a discussion with a business partner. It started o: cordially but soon escalated into a verbal sparring sessionW
with each of us interrupting the other. Tension built upW and it became heated until one of us called for a time5out. “e never called a truceW and thepartnershipwasdissolved.
2. Share without pretending. Ephesians 4”1K” To Vshare without pretending' in a biblical sense means we are called to speak the truth withlove.Itinvolvese,pressingourselveshonestlyandgenuinelyWwithout deceitorfalsehood.
3. Speak without accusing. E,pressing feelings in a non5judgemental or non5blaming way can help to create healthy relationships and avoid argumentsandresentment.
4. Enjoy without complaint. This means being patient and accepting hardshipscalmly.PhilippiansN”14says”—Doallthingswithoutgrumbling ordisputing.—Thisverseemphasisestheideathatweshoulddoeverything withoutcomplainingorarguing.
5. Give without sparing. This means being generous and sel8ess in givingW without holding back or hesitating. It implies a willingness to provideassistanceWresourcesWorsupporttootherswholeheartedly.
“hateveryouhaveinabundanceWshareit”
IfyouhavemoneyWgivemoney.
IfyouhaveloveWgivelove.
IfyouhavetimeWlendalisteningear.
IfyoumeetsomeoneinneedofcompassionWgivefreely.
IfsomeoneneedsahelpinghandWe,tendit.
6.Trust without wavering.Thismeansholdingfasttoone"shopeand confessionwithouthesitationorcompromise.
Bo one has truly failed until they give up! I started my speaking and training career with no qualixcationsW no trainingW and no e,perience.
ArmedwithpassionWbeliefWandconviction7almostlikeaprophecythat Iwouldbecomeane,emplarytrainingconsultant7Ibeganknockingon doors. Some doors openedW and that was all I needed. That was NR years agoWandIOmstillgoingstrong.
7. Pray without ceasing.Thismeanshavingaheartinclinedtoprayer andmakingitahighpriority.ItinvolvesprayingoftenWrelyingonGodfor strengthWholdingtemptationsbeforeHimWandaskingforHishelp.
6onsider what it would be like to be in the other person"s position.
FocusonthejourneyWnotjusttheoutcome.
Evenifyoudon"talwaysagreeWberespectful.
“orktogethertocreatecommitment.
Focusonestablishingwin5winrelationships.
9. Answer without arguing.Ixndthise,tremelyusefulandrelatively easy to do. As a trainerW I always encourage my class to ask questions. It isafactthattwopeoplecanhavecompletelydi:erentopinionsaboutthe sameissueandbothcanbecorrect!
10. Promise without forgetting. This means making a commitment or pledge to do something and diligently following through without neglectingit.
Thisishowtrustisbuilt.Ibelieveinpromisingalotanddeliveringeven more.
9eing consistent7consistently doing what you say you will do7builds accountabilityandmakesyousomeoneeveryonewantstoworkwith.
Lesson
Loving is listeningW sharingW givingW trustingW prayingW forgivingW not accusingW not complainingW not arguingW and keeping promises. Love makestheworldgoround.Lifebecomessomuchbetterwhenpeopletreat oneanotherwithloveandcare.
I started practicing positive thinDing, but I realised it wasn—t enoughk It taughtmetothinDpositively,butsomethingwasmissingkThenitdawned onmeWIneededtobelievepositivelykFhenIpositivelybelieveIcando something,mymindconvincesmybodythatIcanachieveitk
1or eBample, I plan to go for a run today, but it starts to rain heavilyk
weatherkFhatifitdoesn—tstopMPositivebelievingensuresthatregardless oftheweather,Iwillstillgetmyrunk7ybeliefpushesmetoruninthe rain, drive to the Vational Stadium to use the sheltered tracD, or run up anddownmy?-!storeyblocDthreetimeskPositivebelievingensuresIget mytrainingdone4
IbelieveIcanWandthat—showImaDeithappenk
Fhen I was selling life insurance, I used to spend 7onday evenings maDing calls to (ll my appointment booD for the following weeDE two appointments a day, ?6 appointments a weeDk Positive thinDing told me thatifIputinthehardworDofcallingprospectsfromYpmto?0pm,I would(llmyappointmentbooDk;et,thatdidn—talwayshappen4
Positive believing, however, told me that if I couldn—t secure all ?6 appointments on 7onday, I should continue calling on Tuesday, Fednesday, and even Thursday and 1riday if neededWuntil all the appointmentsweremadek
It—s not about the number of hours spent calling or the number of calls madeO it—s about maDingas many calls as necessary to hll t1e 4p a..ointmentsT g1at is .ositive believin!P uositive believin!
!Larantees sLccessk 2nce I found this missing linD, success naturally followedk
Aesson
It—snotonlyabouthowhardweworDbutalsohowpersistentlyweworD until we achieve the desired resultsk 3est if you are tired, but giving up shouldneverbeanoptionkPositivebelievingprovidestherelentlessdrive to reach the results we desirek ’nd when success comes, it will feel truly sweetk
ction
Fe fail only when we give upk Start thinDing positively and practicing positivebelieving,andsuccesswillbeguaranteedk
Beforeembarkingonmytrainingandspeakingjourney,Iapproachedafew localprofessionals,askingthemtomentorme.Unfortunately,allofthem turned me down. In the 1990s, the Seld of local speaking and training professionalswasstilllimited.
-o, I started on my journey the best way I could. I began by giving free presentations and training sessions to nonxproSt organisations, communitycentres,andlibraries.IneededtobuildmyconSdence,skills, andeTperience.
I joined qoastmasters in 1990, which provided me with incredible eTposure and a uni(ue opportunity to eTperiment and develop my eTpertise.qoastmasterswasmylaboratory.Ipracticeddeliveringprepared speeches, impromptu speeches )speaking o6 the cu6A, and honed my evaluationskills.
Ibeganwithshortseminarslastingonetotwohoursandgraduallymoved on to delivering workshops that spanned one to three days. qhrough qoastmasters, I gained the courage to transition from free speaking engagementstopaidones.
In199C,siTyearsafterjoiningqoastmasters,IregisteredMccentqraining —onsultants on 1st :ay. Before charging fees for my courses, I used
qoastmasters as a safe environment to eTperiment, eTplore, and eTpand. I approached inxhouse qoastmasters clubsHthose belonging to speciSc organisationsorcompaniesHando6eredtoconductfreetrainingsessions for them. I participated in speech contests at various levels, challenging myselfagainstsomeofthebestspeakersqoastmastershadtoo6er.
Ms I grew, I developed fullxday courses that gained popularity among participants. I asked myself? Oow can I stand out from the rest of the trainersE
I enrolled in courses speciSc to communication skills, not only to learn from eTperts but also to evaluate their training skills and techni(ues. I neededtounderstandmycompetition.:ystrategywastoidentifythebest intheSeldandthenstrivetosurpassthem.
Oowever, I made sure to emulate rather than imitate. I observed their speaking styles, delivery skills, and training methodologies and then developed my own uni(ue style. qhat’s how I stood out, how I became di6erentfromtherest,andhowIearnedmyplaceasasoughtxaftertrainer.
Lesson
Di6erence makes us uni(ue, unrepeatable, and valuable. ”mbracing uni(uenessfosterspersonalgrowthandinnovation.
“nce you stand out from the crowd, you become a role model, an icon, andabeaconHaforcetobereckonedwith.
“Smart people learn from their own mistakes; the smartest peoplelearnfromothers’mistakesandstrengths;stupidpeople keep repeating the same mistakes, because they are either unawareofthosemistakesortheyrefusetochange.”–JohnSih
Story
A common mistake lecturers and trainers make is asking their students or trainees to reserve their questions until the end of the lesson. This discourages students or trainees from developing the habit of asking questionsduringclass.
Herearethekeydisadvantagesofthisapproach:
1.LimitedTwo-WayCommunication:E,ectivecommunication thrives on interaction. Encouraging questions during the lesson fosters lively discussions2 deeper understanding2 and a vibrant learningenvironment.
W.Missed Opportunities for ClariAcation: xhen trainees need further ewplanation2 the best time to address their questions is immediately23hilethetopicisfreshintheirminds.
Q.Ussessment of gnderstandinB: 'uestions during the lesson allo3trainerstogaugetheirtraineesjlevelofunderstanding.This feedbackhelpstrainersad4usttheirdepthandbreadthofteaching toelevatelearning.
’.ConAdenceQuildinB:Ans3eringquestionsearlyande,ectively demonstrates the trainer9s competence and conIdence. This reassurestraineesthattheyareincapablehands.
“fyouareateacher2lecturer2trainer2oreducator2encourageyour students to ask questions throughout the lesson. This fosters meaningfult3o 3ayinteractionandaddsmorefuntotheclass.
When I was in secondary school, I had two classmates, A1 and A2, whom I considered my best friends. We did almost everything together—shopping, bowling, going to shows, and visiting tourist attractionsinSingapore.Ourfriendshipseemedunbreakable,butithad neverbeentrulytested.
We went shopping at Metro in Ear Past zla"a and found a bin of cheap wallets. While browsing, I shoved my own wallet into my back pocket.
Aswewereleaving,twoburlymenstoppedusandaccusedmeofstealing awallet.Withoutidentifyingthemselves,theydraggedmeintoanoKce, searched me, and found my wallet. After con-rming it was mine, they dismissedmewithacurt3OY,youcango,3withoutevenapologi"ingfor thehumiliation.
When I emerged, A1 and A2 were nowhere to be found. They had abandoned me without a word! At that moment, I reali"ed that true friendshipistestedintimesofneed,andtheyhadfailedthetest!
The older I get, the fewer friends I keep. But that’s really -ne! I prefer ?ualityover?uantity!
WithagecomeseLperience.Asyoupassthroughlife,yougothroughmany trials. As you get older, you -nd that there are a few friends who have supportedyouduringthesediKculttimes.Roulearntodependonthose selectfewandhavelittleornotimeforpeoplewhowerenottherewhen youneededthem.
1.The Hi! And Bye! Friends4 These are ac?uaintances. Ac?uaintances are people with whom we have surfacejlevel interactions, without any signi-cant emotional involvement in therelationship.
2.Casual Friends: These are social friends—people we might befriendattheoKce,gym,orsocialclub.Thefoundationofthis relationshipoftenrestsonsharedenvironmentsoractivities,such asasportsteam,aworkplace,orahobbygroup.Theconnection
x.Close Friends4 These are our besties—the people in our inner circle. These are the friends that we bond with instantly, talk withoften,shareourstruggleswith,andcon-deourdeepestand darkest fears in. These are often the friends whose values most closelyalignwithourown.
“.Lifelong Friends4 qifelong friends are the people we’ve been friends with since childhood. These are often the friends with whomyoucanbeyourmostauthenticself.
zobegreatfeanstoinmreaseinsixe,toev’andbecondcourmurrentle“el, tobebecondtheordinarcora“erage.zhefeaningoTbeinggreatistobe evme’tional,if’ortant,ordistinguished.Manc’eo’le,intheorc,yantto be”greatY.Detfanc’eo’leinliTe,realistimallc,donotyantto’utinthe e?ort o“er a sustained ’eriod oT tife to amtuallc amhie“e greatness. zhec arelookingTorthe”semretstosummessYthat,infancyacs,donotevist.Bo couknoyyhatbringssummessGHardworkbringssuccess.
Story
Seinggreat,tofe,isbeingmonsistentlcgood.Creatnessinasingleinstanme man be redumed to lumk. Creatness is not instantaneous. Creatness is amhie“edoneste’atatife.Creatnessisearned.Seing”greatYisnotabout beingbetterthansofeoneelse.Itisaboutbeingtrustworthy,reliable, dependable,disciplinedandhard-working.
Mcdad,!ihKia8hoon,John,yasagreatfanjIha“ese“ensiblings.Mc dadyastheonlcbreadyinneroTourTafilc.Mcfufyasahofefaker. !he su’’orted fc dad bc looking aTter us at hofe, ’ro“iding a yarf, ’eameTul, lo“ing and semure en“ironfent, so Bad had the ’eame oT find
Bad ser“ed the moffunitc bc being a grassroots leader. Pe hel’ed our Mefber oT Earliafent bc going on yalkabouts yith hif and arrangingfeetAtheA’eo’lesessions.Pesatonfancmoffittees,likethe 8offunitc8entreqvemuti“e8offittee.PeyasthemhairfanoTthe!t. Jose’hwsBcingFidFssomiation,andheyasamhurmhyardentoo.Seing yellAedumated,Badusedhisabilitiestohel’theunder’ri“ilegedandthe unedumated.Eeo’leusedto“isitusyithallkindsoTre(uestsTorBadto ask the go“ernfent Tor hel’. Fnd fc dad yould hel’ thef tc’e letters and’osttheftotherele“antauthoritiesontheirbehalT. )orthoseyhosere(uestsyeregranted,thecyould“isittothankfcdad, bearing giTtsj zhe nuferous giTts ye remei“ed attested to the nufber oT indi“iduals fc dad had hel’ed in his liTetife. Pe yorked hard, hel’ing ’eo’le,tillhis“erclastdacj
Bad yas ayarded the Eingat Sakti Mascarakat RESM9 Eublim !er“ime MedalasyellastheSintangSaktiMascarakatRSSM9Eublim!er“ime!tar. I af su’er ’roud oT fc dad Tor being fc shining star and fc best role fodel.PeyasfcUomkoTCibraltarjIafevtrefelchonouredthatfc dadnafedfeaTterhif.zhankcou,Badj
"At the end of life, what really matters is not what we bought but what we built; not what we got but what we shared; not our competence but our character;notoursuccess,butoursignificance.Livealifethatmatters.Live alifeoflove!"
"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people alwaysdothat,butthereallygreatmakeyoufeelthatyoutoo,canbecome great."–Markzyain
Lesson 16: Health is Wealth
“Health is like money. We never have a true idea of its value untilweloseit.”–JoshBillings
Introduction
Intoday’sratrace,everyoneisworkinghardtoestablishasuccessfulcareer andacquirewealth.Theratracebeginsalmostthemomentweareborn–fromgettingintoagoodschooltosecuringthatprestigiousjob.However, millions now want to break free from this cycle, with these two words sheddinglightonthefrustrationfeltbytheyoungergeneration.
Many people neglect their health by not engaging in a regular exercise programme, maintaining a healthy diet, or taking care of their mental health.Toleadahealthylife,wemustbeCtandwellbothphysicallyand mentally.
Ifyouareconstantlyeatingjunkfoodyetdonothaveanydiseases,itdoes not mean you are healthy. !onsuming unhealthy food naturally implies thatyouarenothealthyATherefore,toliveahealthylife,youneedthebasic essentialsthatconstituteahealthylifestyle.
ShenIjoinedYIYasaCnancialadvisor,thecompanywasregularlythe top performer in the industryA My colleagues were very ambitious and highly focused on acquiring wealth. 3ome of the top performers were
They led holistic and balanced lives – they inspired meA I took them as my role models. I worked hard to establish my career and continued my exerciseregime.
In my second year, I bought my Crst car – a brandznew black Honda !ivicA3ixmonthslater,IalmostdiedAIstoppedatatraPclightzcontrolled pedestrian crossing, and a drunken van driver crashed into me from behindA My car lunged forward and hit the taxi in front of me. I was sandwichedbetweenthetaxiandthevan.
I was unconscious for a few seconds. Shen I regained consciousness, I realisedthatmyforeheadwasbleeding.MyseatbeltsavedmeAIonlyhad a cut on my right eyebrow. My car was a total wreckA I had to sell it and boughtanotherbrandznewcarAThistime,aMa1daYstina–asaloonwith concealedheadlampsthatlookedsportyA
Shat did not kill me made me strongerA Sith renewed hope, drive, and enthusiasm, I started focusing on selling 0ersonal Yccident policies. I believedthatgettingcoveredforpersonalaccidentsshouldbeeveryone’s top priority. My life became much more precious to me, so I started workingharder,exercisingmoreregularly,andeatingmorehealthily.
Shen I went back to 3embawang Yirbase for reservist training at 42E 3quadron, my former colleagues and reservist comrades saw the transformationinme.Iwaswealthier,healthier,morepositive,andamuch
Holisticlivingisabouttrulyunderstanding,supporting,andhonouring the interconnectedness, uniqueness, and overall wellzbeing of the SH—R( person from all angles, on all levels – physically, mentally, emotionally,socially,spiritually,andenergetically.
Istartedmyworkinglifeasaregularinthe8epublicof3ingaporeYirforce F83Y$5. Ys career soldiers, we were supposed to be physically Ct, but someofmycolleagueswereobese.3omeledunhealthylifestyles,indulging in smoking, drinking, and neglecting their diets. Rife in the Yirforce was really ideal in many ways) good pay and job security. However, my colleagueswerewealthybutnotveryhealthyA
3o, I focused on studying hard – taking night classes – and exercising to keep myself Ct. It became a lifestyle for me) continuous studying and upgradingmyselfwhilemaintainingahealthyandbalancedlifestyle.
Y balanced lifestyle is a way of living in which a healthy balance exists between the time and e ort spent working, the time spent with family andfriends,andpersonaltimeforyourself.Itinvolvesmakingdecisionsin variousareassuchaswork,leisure,relationships,andpersonalhealththat promoteoverallwellzbeing.
Having a balanced lifestyle is essential for achieving optimum levels of physicalandmentalhealth.
“When you start taking care of yourself, you start feeling better, looking better,andattractingbetter.Itallstartswithyou.L–IdilYhmad 8egardlessofyourcurrenthealthorwealthstatus,worktowardachieving equilibrium Cnancial, physical, and mental health. This balance is the keytoatrulyfulClling,complete,andsuccessfullife.
Because the most important relationship in your life is with yourself.
Condcenpe is a vositiue anc assrmec hincset tbat enafles veovle to gape pballen,esk ta.e mis.sk anc vrmsre tbeim ,oalsI ’t-s ogten pbamaptemisec fy a sense og selgwfeliegk selgwjomtbk innem stmen,tbk anc a vositiue ortloo.I
’t also inuolues bauin, gaitb in one-s pavafilitiesk pohvetenpek anc –rc,ehentI
?oj pan soheone jbo bas lihitec gomhal ecrpation fepohe pondcent ancsrppessgrlT…bisishystomy:’felieuetbemeameonlytjotbin,stbat ,iueavemsonpondcenpe1
KI(nojlec,e)anctberseogit2I
EIx!vemienpeI
…bat-sitJqrsttjoI
1)Knowledge:
’ co not baue a bi,b leuel og gomhal ecrpationI …o ha.e rv gom tbatk ’ mealisec tbat ’ bac to ap8rime a bi,b leuel oginformal educationI ’ meac uomapiorslyancponcrptece!tensiuemeseampbontbetovipstbat’teapbI’ attencecpormsestoleamngmohtbee!vemtsanctoap8rimehomecevtbanc
fmeactb in hy cohain .nojlec,eI Continrin, ecrpation is an on,oin, –ormneygomheI
—t tbe fe,innin, og hy svea.in, anc tmainin, pameemk ’ cic not baue e!vemienpek so ’ bac to jom. bamc on ,atbemin, .nojlec,e jbile slojly ancsrmelyap8rimin,tbenepessamye!vemienpeI
’ahabi,blyuisralanc.inestbetipleamnemI’li.etoofsemueveovleanchy srmmorncin,sI’baueanaprtesenseogsitrationalajameness'tbeafility tovempeiuekrncemstanckancmesvonctoanysitrationI’tmainhyselgtofe ajame og jbatzs ,oin, on amornc he anc rse tbat ingomhation to ha.e cepisionsancauoicbaPamcsI
…o leamn eNeptiuelyk ’ neec to ,et fotb geet jet'to ,et into tbe tbip. og tbin,sancvmaptisekvmaptisekvmaptiseJx!vosrmeis.eyIOmaptipecoesNOT ha.e he vemgeptk feparse vemgeption coesNOT e!ist in hy jomlcI —s a brhank’ahihvemgeptJ?ojeuemk’jill.eevstmiuin,tojamcsvemgeptin, hypmagtIOmaptisin,pommepttepbni8resanchetbocolo,iesonlyha.eshe fettemI
’alsomealisectbat.nojlec,ealoneis"B…vojemI’t-stbevmovemrseog .nojlec,etbatha.esrsvojemgrlJ(nojin,alotisnotenor,bIWeneec to sbame jbat je .nojI …be home je sbamek tbe home pohgomtafle anc pohvetentjefepoheinsbamin,I
EIHeponck to fe fettem tban hek yor neec to ap8rime .nojlec,e anceamnyorme!vemienpeinahrpbsbomtemtihetban’cicI“om e!ahvlekig’celiuemKAsveepbesahontbkyorpanceliuemEAI…bat jaykyorjillta.ebalgtbetihe’too.to,aintbesaheahorntog e!vemienpeI’g’too.oneyeamkyorporlcapbieuetbesaheleuelin si!hontbsJ3orjillsoonsrmvasstbee!vemienpeancpohvetenpe ’baueIG
— hrpb easiem jay to leamn is tbmor,b otbem veovle-s e!vemienpesI Meamn tbmor,btbevojemogofsemuationIBfsemuejbatotbemscoeNeptiuelyanc ehrlatetbehIBfsemuejbatotbemscoineNeptiuelyancauoicha.in,tbe
“Onceyou’vegainedenoughdepthandbreadthinyourknowledge,combined with sufficient experience, you will acquire the competence, inner strength, andself-beliefthatnaturallyleadstoaheightenedlevelofself-confidenceIG RqobnHib
Lesson
KI4atbem as hrpb cevtb anc fmeactb og .nojlec,e as yor panI
Fepoheasrf–epthatteme!vemtI
EI4ain as hrpb e!vemienpe as yor panI x!vemienpe is sohetbin, nofocypanta.eajaygmohyor'it-syormsrvemvojemJ
—ccitionallyke!empisebasavojemgrleNeptonpondcenpeISe,rlame!empise meleasesencomvbinskjbipbintemaptjitbtbeoviatemepevtomsintbefmaink vmocrpin, a vleasrmafle state og hincI ’n trmnk yor-ll uiej yormselg in a home vositiue li,btIWben yor e!empise me,rlamlyk yor not only ihvmoue vbysipally frt also geel home hotiuatec to apt in jays tbat frilc yorm selgwpondcenpeIWbenyorloo.,oockyorgeel,ooctooJ
Action
KIUa.e ligelon, leamnin, a ligestyleI Ua.e pontinrors ecrpation yorm,oalI
EI4et as hrpb e!vosrme as yor panI Omaptisek vmaptisek vmaptiseJ "otbin, mevlapes e!vemienpe'it-s bamcweamnec frt jomtb euemy eNomtI
Iwasfortunatetohaveacquiredtheartofpublicspeakingearlyinmylife. Idiscoveredthispassioninschool.MythreefavouriteteacherswereMrs. Rose Liu, Mr. Joseph DeCruz, and Mr. E. Joseph. They were the three whohelpedmediscovermypassionforspeaking.
Mrs. Liu was my form teacher when I was in Secondary 3 and 4. She was our English Language and Literature teacher. She would choose six students, divide us into two teams, write down the motion on the
chalkboard,andaskustodebateonthemotion.Thosewereimpromptu sessions that I enjoyed the most! Mrs. Liu called me “The Dark-Light Horse.”Iaskedherwhy.ShesaidIwasveryquietinclass,butwhenIspoke up,Imadeanimpact!Imademyclassmatessitupandtakenotice.Iloved it!Sheselectedmetorepresentmyclassintheinter-classdebates.
Mr. Joseph DeCruz and Mr. E. Joseph were the teachers in charge of ourLiterary,Drama,andDebateSociety(LDDS).Theyselectedmeand trained me to represent Montfort Secondary School in the inter-school debates.
My three favourite teachers instilled in me the courage, conNdence, and conviction to speak up and be heard! I went on to obtain a Licentiate fromTrinityCollegetoteachE:ectiveCommunicationSkills.Ichoseto becomeatrainingconsultantandeducatorbecauseofthem!Yow,Iwant tobeMrs.Liu,Mr.DeCruz,andMr.Josephtoallmytrainees,toinstill inthemtheimportanceofspeakingup,lettingtheirvoicesbeheard,and verbalising their beliefs and convictions. I aim to inspire my trainees to discovertheirtalentsandpassionsinlife.
WhyArePublicSpeakingSkillsSoImportant?
Professionally’Thehigheryouclimbuptherungsofyoursuccessladder, the more you will be required to speak. Oou might have to talk about your work, specialty, product, or organisation at a conference, make an acceptancespeechafterreceivinganaward,makeanonlinepresentation, give a report to management about your teamAs performance, or even
takepartinanoratoricalcontestinthefuture!CreatingtheNrstpositive, memorable, and impactful impression is an art that you will need to acquire.
MostoftheclientsthatIcoachinpublicspeakingskillsengagedmeonly when they became CEQs, managing directors, managers, or leaders in society.ItAstoolate!Thebesttimetopickupthisskilliswhileyouare still climbing the success ladder,notwhenyouAvereachedthehighest rungsoftheladder!
Gccording to the father of EH, Dr. Daniel Boleman, Emotional Intelligence or EH is the ability to understand and manage your own emotionsaswellasrecogniseandin9uencetheemotionsofthosearound you.
TheNveelementsofEmotionalIntelligenceare’
Self-Awareness’ The ability to recognise and understand your ownemotions.
Self-Regulation’ The ability to regulate and manage your emotions.
Self-Motivation’ Faving the passion to fulNl your inner needs andgoals.
Emotionalintelligencehelpsyouhandleemotions,connectwithpeople, make good choices, and stay calm when life gets complicated. EH is one ofthefactorsthatallowspeopletonavigatecomplexsocialsituationswith easeormaintaincomposureunderpressure.
“Communicationisaskillthatyoucanlearn.Ifyouarewillingtoworkat it, you can rapidly improve the quality of every part of your life.” –Wrian Tracy
E:ective communication is the process of exchanging information, thoughts, and emotions in a way that ensures the intended audience understands the message. It involves both speaking and listening, and it—smorethanjustconveyinginformation.E:ectivecommunicationalso involvesmakingsuretheotherpersonfeelsheardandunderstood.
Gn e:ective communicator is someone who can clearly and completely expresstheirideaswhilealsobeingreceptivetotheinputofothers.They canunderstandtheemotionsandintentionsbehindwhatisbeingsaidand makeothersfeelheardandunderstood.
Develop good interpersonal skills’ We patient, be an active listener,andstaymotivated.
Gnadaptablepersoncankeepupwithshiftingpriorities,projects,clients, and technology. They are skilled at dealing with changes at work or processingupdatesintheirenvironmente:ectively.
“)xeing:onsistent
"Successdoesn'tcomefromwhatyoudooccasionally.Itcomesfromwhatyou do consistently. Success isn't always about greatness. It's about consistency. Consistenthardworkleadstosuccess.Greatnesswillcome."–Gnonymous
Personal Life’ Wrushing your teeth twice a day, 9ossing daily,
going for a walk in the garden, jogging every morning, eating healthily, exercising a minimum of three times per week, and readingabookforhalfanhourdaily.
Professional Life’ Biving 1UU commitment, being dedicated to constant growth and improvement, consistently delivering qualitywork,andalwaysbeingpunctual.
xuilding Relationships’ Regularly nurturing deep and meaningfulrelationships.
Prioritising Tasks’ Vsing the GWCDE technique to prioritise tasks,whereGisthehighestpriority,Wisaverage,andsoon.
Working Through :hallenges’ Identifying the cause of a disruptionandworkingthroughittoavoidfuturedisruptions.
The recommended amount of sleep for a healthy adult is at least seven hours. Most people don—t need more than eight hours in bed to be well-rested. Bo to bed and get up at the same time every day, including weekends.Weingconsistentreinforcesyourbody—ssleep-wakecycle.
Betting enough sleep is important for your health and well-being, including’
Physical Health. Sleep helps you maintain a healthy weight, improve your heart health, and lower your risk of chronic conditions like diabetes. It also helps your body repair damage fromstress.
Mental Health. Sleep can help you reduce stress, improve your mood, and enhance your relationships with others. It also helps youthinkmoreclearly,improvelong-termmemory,andperform betterinschoolandatwork.
Safety. Sleep can help you avoid injuries and motor vehicle accidents.Drowsydrivingisacauseofthousandsofcaraccidents eachyear.
Athletic Performance. Sleep provides the energy and motivation to perform well in sports, especially in endurance
activitieslikerunning,swimming,andcycling.
Browth and Development. In children and teens, sleep supportsgrowthanddevelopment,particularlyintheprefrontal cortex, which is responsible for problem-solving, reasoning, and regulatingemotions.
Bettingmoresleepisakeypartoftheequation,butrememberthatitis not just about sleep quantity. Huality sleep matters too! It is possible to getthehoursyouneedbutnotfeelrefreshedifyoursleepisfragmentedor non-restorative.Improvingyourbedroomsettingandsleep-relatedhabits isane:ectivewaytoachievebetterrest.
Empathyistheabilitytoemotionallyunderstandwhatotherpeoplefeel, see things from their point of view, and imagine yourself in their place. Essentially, it is putting yourself in someone elseAs position and feeling whattheyarefeeling.
Gpatientwithdementiawasatamedicalappointmentwithherdaughter. Thedoctorgavethedaughteralotofmedicalinformationandadvice,but the mother with dementia waited patiently for him to Nnish. /hen the doctoraskedthedaughterifshehadanyquestions,themothersaid,“I—m still in here. So now that youAve told my daughter all that stu:, can you pleasetellmeK”
Emotional Regulation. Empathy can help you regulate your emotionalresponses,maintainingyourpsychologicalwell-being.
:ompassion. Empathy allows you to understand and assess a person—s feelings and circumstances, while compassion involves doingsomethingtoalleviatethosecircumstances.
Emotional Intelligence. Emotional intelligence enables you to practice empathy without being overwhelmed by emotion or havingyourjudgmentcloudedbyyourownbeliefs.
Thepowerofempathyistheabilitytounderstandandsharethefeelings of others, which can help people build stronger relationships, resolve con9icts,andcreatesocialchange.
Practicing empathy allows you to inspire, in9uence, and connect with others.
Lesson
Qnce we have acquired and internalised these eight skills, our lives will improve exponentially. Personally, my life has become more fulNlled, energised, and complete. I feel more conNdent, insightful, adaptable, proNcient,ande cient.
Action
Learning hard-to-acquire skills will deNnitely pay o: because they are valuable,priceless,andrare.Weopenandwillingtolearn.Investthetime inacquiringthem.Wepatient RomewasnAtbuiltinaday.Theseskillsare importantforyour resumetoo.
Lesson 19: You Have a Choice Each and Every Single Day
“I choose to feel blessed. I choose to feel grateful. I choose to feel excited.Ichoosetofeelthankful.Ichoosetofeelhappy.”–Amber Housley
Story
I feel blessed! I feel grateful to have good health, unconditional love, su.cientfame,goodfortune,andrecognisedtalentsp
2pThinkbiggerthanmyself.Iwndand:ursueasenseofmeaning and :ur:ose outside of myself in the form of my community, faith,career,interestgrou:s,andorganisationsp
Gracticing gratefulness can hel: Pith de:ression, anYiety, and im:rove slee: and heart healthp It can also create a :ositive social environment byencouragingotherstoeY:ressthan3fulnesspTratefulnessreducesyour
Ichoosetofeelthankful.Iamthan3fulforthesekTod,myreligion,laughter, a good nightJs slee:, holidays Pith family, good neighbours, wnancial savings, insurance :olicies, teachers, music, giving and receiving gifts, receivingthan3Fyoucardsandnotes,andold:hotogra:hsp
joday, I am than3ful and thin3 of hoP rich I really amp Ly family and friends are :ricelessp Ly ha::iness is :reciousp Ly time is goldp And my healthisPealthp
7eing than3ful is the act of eY:ressing a::reciation for the :eo:le and thingsinourlivespIt5salso3noPnasgratitude,a:ositiveemotionthatcan havemanymentaland:hysicalhealthbenewtsp
I constantly remind myself that ha::iness is not a state of constant eu:horiap Ha::iness is a sense of eY:eriencing more :ositive emotions thannegativeonesp
Ha::y :eo:le still feel the Phole range of human emotions li3e anger, frustration, boredom, loneliness, and even sadness from time to timep
7ut even Phen faced Pith discomfort, they have an underlying sense of o:timism that things Pill get better, that they can deal Pith Phat is ha::ening,andthattheyPillbeabletofeelha::yagainp
“Ha::iness is a choice, not a resultp Kothing Pill ma3e you ha::y until youchoosetobeha::yp”–Cal:hLarston
Theseare-ScienceBCackedSecretsto5appiness’
Kurtureyourrelationshi:sp
Gerformrandomactsof3indnessp
!urroundyourselfPithha::y:eo:lep
!milemorep
Doo3fordailyeY:eriencesofaPep
Phoosingtofeelhappymeans’
La3ing decisions that encourage ha::y moments, even though it5s not :ossibletofeelha::yallthetimep
Uractice aLrmationsk jhin3 :ositive thoughts and :ractice :ositiveselfFtal3p
Aake up on your termskWonJtletothersJeY:ectationsdictate yourschedulep
esson
Watch your thoughts; they become your words. Watch your words; they become your actions. Watch your actions; they become your habits. Watch your habits; they become your character. Watch your character; it becomes yourdestinyp –Daoj e
ction
Gracticingmindfulnessormeditationcanhel:usbecomeaPareofPhat Pe feel in the momentp Lindfulness involves noticing our thoughts, emotions,andbodyatanygiventimePithout'udgingortryingtoma3e senseofthempInstead,Peac3noPledgesensations,feelings,andideasas theyha::enp
IlovethisreminderfromAmberHousleyp hilePecannotchoosehoP Pe feel, Pe can choose hoP Pe Pant to res:ond to our feelingsp e can choosetobeblessed,grateful,eYcited,than3ful,andha::yE
Respectisearned,honestyisappreciated,trustisgained,andloyalty is returned. -isrespect erodes selIjesteem. 6t damages mental health. 6t ma8es you believe that disrespect is normal. 6t can lead to constant and unavoidabledisrespect,lostIriends,’obs,oropportunities,anddamageto trust.
-onRt let people waste your time repeatedly. -onRt let them tal8 down to you in a conversation. Loo8 Ior behavioural change and not ’ust an apology.—espectisnRtdemandedOitRsearned.
AvoidingNegativeFeedbackSCharingourgoalscansometimes lead to s8epticism or criticism Irom others, which might discourageusorcreateselIjdoubt.
Focus and ClarityS Keeping our goals private allows us to concentrate on our vision and re5ne our plans without e7ternal distractionsorinYuences.
“So many of our dreams at first seem impossible, then they seem improbable, and then when we summon the will, they soon become inevitable.”—Ahristopher—eeve
-onRt let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do based on their preconceivednotions.?henyoustoplettingothersde5neyou,youopen thedoortodiscoveringyourtruepassionsandpurposeinliIe.6nsteadoI IollowingsomeoneelseRspath,youcanIorgeyourown.
!void choosing a partner who doesnWt meet your needs, e7pectations, or desires. Cettling can be dangerous and lead to Iuture problems, such as missingoutontheopportunitytobewithsomeonewhoisabettermatch.
Gene5tsoIwaitingS
Fewer chances oI separationS ?aiting to meet the right person can reduce the chances oI marrying someone youWre not compatiblewith.
6appier marriageS ?aiting to marry can lead to a happier marriage.
They drain your mental and emotional resources, hi’ac8 your sense oI selI,inIectyourmoodandoutloo8onliIe,createstressandunhappiness, ma8e you doubt your Ieelings and e7periences, slow down or sabotage yourprogress,andpullyouawayIromhealthy,empowering,andupliIting relationships.
!pproach your goals with unwavering determination and perseverance, viewingobstaclesaschallengestoovercomeratherthanasreasonstoaccept deIeat,toensuresuccess.
In a religious context, faith can mean belief in God, the teachings of a religionorthetraditionaldoctrinesofareligion.Itcanalsomeanputting yourtrustinGodandhavingcon:dencethathewillful:lhispromises.
Faith and hope are complementary. Faith is grounded in the past, while hopelooWstothefuture.
Without faith, there is no hope and without hope there is no true faith.
Story
Bhen I bought the rights toPsycho - GeometricsTM, it was a huge :nancial investment. jut deep inside, I Wnew that it was a worthwhile investment,becausewithinayearafterobtainingtherights,IearnedbacW theinvestment,byconductingtalWs,seminarsandcoursesonthesubMect.
IhavetoconfessthatitwasallbecauseofmyfaithinGodAIprayedvery hardforhisguidanceandIasWedhimforsigns. He gave me condwence anwheshobewmesignsanwheluessewmebiths!ccessL3ndbecause
Yo act on our faith means to pray, believing that we have received our answer,themomentthatweprayedandtobegintotaWeaction,Wnowing thatwehavereceivedwhatweSveasWedfor.
“The mystery of human existence lies not in just staying alive, butinfindingsomethingtolivefor.”–FyodorDostoyevsky
A sense of purpose in life is a driving force that guides your actions and decisions and gives meaning to your life. It's a long-term goal that's personallymeaningfulandcanmakeapositiveimpactontheworld.
It is the extent to which a person experiences his or her life as having meaning,signiMcance,andcoherence.
Eo7odywantsa7oringlife.Lveryonewantsto7ehappyandalive.…his canonlyhappenifyouhaveapurposeinlife.–ivingameaningfullifeis more fun compared to a life where you donbt en’oy what you are doing. Forlifeto7eworthliving,ithasto7efun8onpurposej
Ynowing your purpose in life can improve your self-worth, your well-7eing, give more meaning to your life experiences, and help you overcomeo7stacles.
Lxplore your passion. Hour passions and interests can lead you to discoveringyourpurposeinlife.Nuttheycan7ehardtoidentify.…heycan 7esoingrainedinyourwayofthinkingthatyou7ecome7lindtothem.If you'reunsurewhatyourpassionsare,askthepeoplewhoknowyou7est.
One right book at the right time can change your life forever. Books are oneofthebestsourcesofeducatingyourself.
Story
There are many books that I consider my favourites! I do not like borrowing books; I prefer to buy them. I believe that when I own these books,Iownthecontents—theyaremoreprecious,morevaluable,andI -nditeasiertointernalisethecontent!
One of the earliest books I read to kickjstart my Dourney to discover my passion and life mission isHow to Win Friends and Influence People by CaleWarnegie.
:hatIlearntN
qever criticise, never argue, show appreciation, be genuinely interested in people, smile, express my opinions, ask ’uestions, understand othersA perspectives, use a personAs name, be a good listener,andmakepeoplefeelimportant.
Leep my heart free from hate and my mind from worry. Sive simply,expectlittle,andgivemuch.2cattersunshine,forgetself,
thinkofothers.
Believe in myself and in everything I do. Cevelop the power to reachmygoals,breaktheworryhabit,andachievearelaxedlife. Improve my personal and professional relationships. Be kind to myself.
qicholas Boothman teaches facejtojface communication skills to ’uickly bond with people. He explains how to make a good -rst impression, start a conversation with almost anyone, establishinstantrapport,andbuildbetterbusinessandpersonal connections.
Overcome di”erences and personality traits that can cause friction.
Inspireotherstoexcellenceandsuccess.
Being a leader means working with people, and thatzs not always easy! :hether in the o4ce, church, neighbourhood, or elsewhere, our interpersonalrelationshipscanmakeorbreakusasleaders.Thatzswhyitzs soimportanttobea5peopleperson5anddevelopourskillsintappingthat mostpreciousofallresourcesNpeople.
Soadedwithlifejenriching,lifejchangingprinciplesforrelatingpositively and powerfully with our families, friends, colleagues, and clients, Be a KeopleKersoniscertaintohelpusbringoutthebestinothers—andthatzs whattrueleadershipis.
HowtoMastertheArtofSellingbyTomHopkins
:hatIlearntN
Tomismyguruinselling!
Tom provides guidance on building relationships, closing sales, andmaintainingapositivemindsetthroughoutthesalesprocess.
This is a truly inspiring book by an extraordinary man. Born withoutarmsorlegs,qickPuDicicovercamehisdisabilitytolive notDustindependentlybutarich,ful-llinglife,becomingarole model for anyone seeking true happiness. qick is my greatest inspiration!
Thenumberoneruleyoumustadheretowhensomeonecheats you—not only to avoid it happening again, but to pave the way forfuturewins.
:hy the traditional view of positive mental attitude doesnzt work—and how to develop a true positive mental attitude that wonztdesertyouwhendisasterstrikes.
The six maDor obstacles to taking action and how to overcome them.
7our speci-c steps to e”ective delegation that will allow you to worklessandexponentiallymultiplybothyourincomeandyour ’ualityoflife.
It is the person you become, not the things you achieve, that is mostimportant.
oumustwalkbyfaithandnotbysight.
If you summon the courage to go after your dream, life will providetheanswers.
I believe that you can do things you never imagined if you challengeyourself.
ToughtimesdonAtlast,buttoughpeopledo.
Kress on. qothing can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; the world is full of unsuccessful people with talent. enius willnot;unrewardedgeniusisalmostaproverb.Educationalone will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Kersistence and determinationaloneareomnipotent.?WalvinWoolidge8
:hen people have that kind of motivation, when obstacles are notafactor,andwhenonlythedreammatters,theymakethings happen. The universe has no choice but to yield to that sort of energy.
KeyLessons:
oumust-ndapowerfulmotivationtodriveyou.
“any of us go through life with brakes on—the brakes of fear,procrastination,unworthiness,andnegativethinking.These preventusfromgivingallthatwehavetogiveandsharingallthat wehavetoshare.
I am good at learning a skill, internalising it, and teaching it. I am good at reading people. I am good at communicating with people. I am good at building rapport with people. I am a good listener. I have learnt and masteredtheartofreadingandexudingbodylanguage.Ihavelearntand masteredtheartofpublicspeaking.Ihavelearntandmasteredtheartof selling.Vndnow,Iamteachingtheseskills.
Mental eVerciseN Feading is a mental exercise that can improve brainfunctionandconnectivity.Itcanalsohelpkeepyourbrain operatingmoree”ectivelyasyouage.
Stress reductionN Feading can help reduce stress and promote relaxation.
Improved memoryN Feading can help improve your concentrationandmemory.
Eocabulary eVpansionN Feading can help expand your vocabularyandstrengthenyourwritingabilities.
Anhanced knowledgeN Feading can help enhance your knowledgeandunderstandingoftheworldaroundyou.
Increased imagination and creativityN Feading can help increaseyourimaginationandcreativity.
nalytical thinking skillsN Feading can help strengthen your analyticalthinkingskills.
Feading is a habit that can improve your lifespan by reducing stress, enhancing mental health, developing new neural pathways, helping you learnempathy,improvingyourabilitytocommunicate,andprovidingyou withhealthyentertainment.
“Lifeisnotfair.Itneverwas.Itisn’t.Anditwon’teverbe.Do not fall into the trap—the entitlement trap of feeling like you areavictim.Youarenot.”—MatthewMcConaughey
Manypeopleworkhardbutnevergetwhattheyfeeltheydeserve.Many people are incredibly decent but always seem to get the short end of the stick. Many people are smart but never seem to apply their academic excellencetoprofessionalorentrepreneurialachievement.
U grew up dreaming of having a beautiful and happy family of my own. Bnfortunately, U had to go through a painful divorce after the birth of my second daughter. Those were the darkest moments of my life! jutI recovered.Isurvived.Ithrived!
RhenU“oinedtheAepublicofSingaporeFir(orce)ASF(9,Uwasnever promoted because U failed my qualifying exams. U remained a private throughout my military career. jecause of that, U worked harder than
anyone else. U was determined to succeed. U have learnt to succeed. I am successful!
“Laws of nature do not make exceptions for nice people. A bullet has no conscience; neither does a malignant tumour or an automobile gone out of control.Thatiswhygoodpeoplegetsickandgethurtasmuchasanyone.”—
Once you understand the power of words, you won’t say just anything.Onceyouunderstandthepowerofthoughts,youwon’t just think anything. And once you understand the power of presence,youwon’tjustbeanywhere.
Knowyourworth.
Knowing your self-worth is something very personal, and it really has nothingtodowithanyoneelse.It’syourinternalmeasureofhowyouvalue yourself,regardlessofwhatotherpeoplemightthinkaboutyouorsayto you.Apersonalmanifestoisadeclarationofyourbeliefsandapowerful setofstatements.
Story
I could have published this book many years ago. After all, I have been advised many times that if I want to be an authority in training, I need towriteabook.Beinganauthormakesmeanauthorityonmysubject.I feelthatthisistheperfecttimebecauseIhaveearnedenoughknowledge, experience,andauthoritytoEnallypublishthisbook.
—achtimeIspeak,conductatalk,seminar,orcourse,IbelievethatIdeserve to be listened to, learnt from, and emulated. I walk my talk. I speak the truthPopenly, sincerely, and unreservedly. I have put in many years of study and research into designing these courses. And I am still adding valuebyconstantlyrevampingthem.IamneversatisEed.!lus,theyears ofexperienceI’veearnedcanneverbetakenawayfrommeq
I constantly ask myself this :uestion“ W(ill I pay the same amount of money )I charge? to attend my own courses”T Yhe answer is always WS—4qT In fact, I would pay much morePdouble, even triple the amountPbecause of the life-changing experiences I share, as well as the
Be clear about your self-worth and your value.Rowdoyouwantto impacttheworld”(hatdiLerencedoyouwanttomakeinthelivesofthe peoplearoundyou”Rowwouldyouliketoberemembered”
Practice self-care. Yake care of yourself mentally, emotionally, socially, and physically. 4elf-care activities can include relaxation techni:ues and spendingtimeinnature.
Cultivate self-compassion. Cnderstand your own value and treat yourselfinalovingway.
1. Stay active and don’t retire. Staying active can help people avoid thenegativee:ectsofretirement,suchasloneliness,cognitivedecline,and poorhealth.Somereasonspeoplemaychoosetostayactiveandnotretire includeP
Continuing to contributeP !eople may want to continue contributingtosocietyintheirownway.Forme,Iendeavourto touchasmanylivesasIcanW
PursuingapassionP!eoplemay-ndthatworkingonsomething they are passionate about aligns with their purpose and keeps themgoing.
2. Leaveurgencybehindandadoptaslowerpaceinlife.'heJapanese concept of ikigai is a philosophy that emphasizes -nding balance and purpose in your life, which can include adopting a slower pace. Ikigai is a search for your passions, aspirations, and purpose, often achieved by exploring the intersection of what you love, what you are good at, what theworldneeds,andwhatyoucanbepaidfor.Itotallyresonatewithand fullyendorsethisphilosophyW
4. Surround yourself with good friends. Surround yourself with people who inspire you with their enthusiasm, positive outlook on life, boundlessenergy,andtrustinyourcapabilities.
and support. 'ry beginnerqfriendly activities like walking, yoga, cycling, swimming,orgroupexerciseslikea"uaaerobicsorpickleball.
6. Smile more and acknowledge people around you. Interact more withpeopleandsmileatstrangersWScienti-cresearchtellsusthatsmiling andcomplimentingotherscansigni-cantlyimproveourwellqbeing,and newstudiesshowthatpositivefacialexpressionscanhavebene-ciale:ects onmentalhealth.
7. Connect with nature. Connecting with nature can have many bene-tsforourmentalandphysicalhealth.
Each time I get to connect with nature, I thank God for creating this beautiful world we live in! Most of the time, we take it for granted. I love hiking in the forest reserves in Singapore as well as around the reservoirs. 'hese are the places with the freshest air in our country. It is alsopeacefuland"uiet.ItreasurethesemomentsinnatureW
9. Liveinthemoment.Livinginthepresentmomentmeansnolonger worrying about what happened in the past and not fearing what will happeninthefuture.ItmeansenHoyingwhatBshappeningnowandliving fortoday.Choosingtoliveinthepastorthefuturenotonlyrobsyouof enHoymenttoday,butitalsorobsyouoftrulyliving.
One of the most signijcant benejts of living in the moment is the pureenFoymentofthenow.Lifeisaseriesofmoments,andwhenweare constantlyfocusedonwhat’snext,wemissoutonsomuch.Meoverlook theHoyinsmallthings,likethewarmthofthesunonourfaceorthetaste ofourmorningco:ee.
Dy practicing mindfulness and living in the present, we can fully experienceandappreciatethesemoments.Insteadofrushingthroughlife, wesavouritW
10. Nollow your passion. Following your passion means building your career plans on your interests and what you care about. → passion is an activityyouenHoyoravaluethatholdssigni-cantpersonalmeaning.
SomebenejtsoffollowingyourpassionincludeP
NuljllmentP !ursuing your passion can lead to a happier, more ful-llinglife.
Skill developmentP Rou can develop skills and talents you may nothaverealizedyouhad.
ConjdencePRoucanbuildyourcon-denceandselfqesteem.
ew opportunitiesP !ursuing your passion can lead to new opportunitiesandexperiences.
Growth can be intentional or unintentional: We can grow
by making changes to our habits and lifestyle or by overcoming eventsthatarebeyondourcontrol.
The pain of losing my marriage helped me focus on Lnding out why it failed. ’earning to understand myself and the other party–s character and idiosyncrasies through Psycho™Geometrics! was the keyO jnce I understoodtherootcause,IwasabletoLndclosure,moveon,andgrowO
Worrying and complaining change nothing. Those who complain the mostaccomplishtheleast.Itisalwaysbettertoattempttodosomething greatandfailthantoattempttodonothingandsucceed.
It–s not over if you–ve lost8 it–s over when you do nothing but complainaboutit.
"Regardlessofwhathappensinthelongrun,rememberthattruehappiness begins to arrive only when you stop complaining about your problems and startbeinggratefulforalltheproblemsyoudon’thave.;™YitishSingh
zour scars are symbols of your strength. zou should wear your scars proudlyassymbolsofyourstrengthandcourage.
Struggles can make us stronger in both physical and psychological ways. For example, struggling against heavy weights in the gym can make muscles grow bigger, and hiking up a steep mountain can help us build
cardiovascular Ltness as well as the belief that we can conHuer other mountains.
jther people–s negativity is not your problem. Yegativity is often a re0ectionofsomeone'sownstrugglesandnotaAudgmentonyou.
Keep your power: Don't let negative people dictate your emotions.zouareresponsibleforyourownmoodandoutlook.
Counterattackwithpositivity:Respondpositivelytonegative comments. For example, if a co-worker says something negative aboutyourshoes,youcouldrespondbysayingsomethingpositive abouttheirdress.
What–s meant to be will eventually be. This is a belief that events or outcomes in life are predetermined or fated and will ultimately happen regardless of one–s e4orts or actions. Sometimes we wish for something sobadly,andyetitdoesn'thappenforvariousreasons.Wemusttrustthe timingoflifeandwhatitsendsourway.
“Imagination is everything; it is the preview of life's coming attractions.”—AlbertEinstein
The law of attraction is a philosophy that states positive thoughts and actions lead to positive outcomes, while negative thoughts and actionsleadtonegativeoutcomes.Itisbasedontheideathat"likeattracts like"andthatourthoughtsandemotionshaveapowerfulimpactonour reality.
Itisthebelief that a person's thoughts have a magnetic power that determines the order of the universe and what they experience in life.Inessence,whatapersonthinksaboutbringsabout.
There is no scienti,c evidence to support the law of attractionH and it is often considered pseudoscience or religion. YoweverH some researchers suggestthatpositivethoughtscanleadtopositiveactions.
Fou can manifest your desires by focusing on them and believing they willhappen.xoreLampleHyoucancreateavibrationalpullthatattractsa personorthingtowardyoubyfocusingonit.
Origin
The (aw of Attraction O()AB has origins in ancient religions and philosophiesH with similar concepts found in YinduH JuddhistH CewishH and6hristianwritings.
Story
Ibelievethatthisphilosophyworks“Ihavenotcountedhowmanytimes it has worked for meH but it has been on many occasions. I have a few scrapbooksinwhichIcollectmySJest”peaker3ribbonsfrommy4jyears as a Toastmaster. I ,ll in the details to remind myself of each Swinning occasion.3
EachtimeIdeliveraspeechoraspeechevaluationHIeLpectthemaWorityof theaudiencememberstovoteformeastheJest”peakerorJestEvaluator. I convince myself that I deserve to win the ribbon because I have put in thehardestworkandmostdiligentpreparation.AndwhenIeLpectitto
6reate your own reality. The main theory behind the law of attraction is that you create your own reality through your thoughtsanddesires.
”end out positive energy. Mhen you feel eLcitedH enthusiasticH passionateH happyH WoyfulH appreciativeH or abundantH you are sendingoutpositiveenergytotheuniverse.
zeali0eyouhavethepowertochangeyourreality.Foucanchange your reality by reorienting your thoughtsH mindsetH and feelings andfocusingonthethingsyouwant.
“Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.38 zalphMaldoEmerson
Habit 1: Speak with Condcenle anc C–arity D S–ow Yown uogr
SpeakinP.ale23henweupeakOitiubetteytoleribeyater–urowlownogy upeakin. yate uo that we can take the ti4e to pyonognce anl engnciate ogy woylu creayr–2 vgy liction wirr ine!itabr– i4pyo!e tooA fruoO ix we upeakuroweyOwetenlto4akexewey4iutakeu26hebeutwa–tobgirlogy condlenceiuthyog.hconutanteIpougyetoupeakin.anlpyactiueOpyactiueO pyactiueA
Habit W: shen YiTlgTTinP Cha––enPinP mopilT D Speak the mrgth2 qnxactOqal!ocateupeakin.thetygthata––ti3eT26heyeiunoneeltorie2 qxuo4ethin.iutoopeyuonartouhayeOwecanarwa–uchoouetokeep'giet abogtit26heyeiuabi.liYeyencebetweenkeepin.auecyetanlterrin.arie2
HabitF:NolgTonthe.roleTTDJotOgTtthe'gtlo3e26hiupyincipre 4eanuxocguin.ontheutepu–ogtaketoachie!ea.oaryatheythanthe.oar ituerx2Heyeayeuo4eyeauonuwh–xocguin.onthepyoceuuiui4poytant: uogvre in lontro–: 3hen –og xocgu on the pyoceuuO –ogPye in chay.e ox what –og can contyorO rike –ogy eYoytO actionuO anl reaynin.2
uog lan le–ebrate efort anc Prowth: -og can cerebyate –ogy eYoytOconuiutenc–Oanlthe.yowth–og4akeOyatheythanmgutthe ogtco4e2
uog lan Ttay 3oti4atec:zyoceuu.oaruherp–oguta–4oti!atel anlco44ittel2joyeIa4preOix–ogwanttoi4pyo!e–ogypgbric upeakin. ukirruO –og can uet a pyoceuu .oar to pyactiue a ceytain a4ogntoxti4eeachweekanluee–ogyuerxi4pyo!e2
uog lan be open to ’ai–gre: 6eutin. ogt ileau to i4pyo!e –ogy pyoceuu 4a– real to xairgyeO bgt it iu an i4poytant payt ox i4pyo!e4ent2
Habit j: make 6p Spale D .roGelt Condcenle2 zeopre oxten pyomect theiy xeayu onto –ogO pracin. ri4itationu on what the– think –og can lo2 3hen –og take gp upaceO –og arrow –ogyuerx to be !ocarO !iuibreO anl condlentinutealoxuh–in.awa–xyo4–ogypowey2
Habit I: Show -engine 7ntereTt D Ue .reTent2 Showin. inteyeut herpu–oggnleyutanlanle4pathiRewiththeupeakeyOrealin.toutyon.ey connectionuanli4pyo!elyerationuhipu2
“Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.”—NapoleonHill
This is my secret to success! When I qrst came across this buotation ,y NapoleonHilldIha..ou,tswHovegerdI.eci.e.topracticeitanyvaywI qSure.therevasnoharmintryinS—Iha.nothinStolosewfoondI,eSan toachiegepositigeresults—an.Ineverstopped!
I starte. my traininS an. spea9inS career in 166Aw :t the same timed I create. my taSline“ ”Speaking is my passion. Selling and training is mylife,andsharingismyfortew2ThistaSlinenotonlyhelpsremin.me okvhoIaman.vhatI.od,utalsohelpsmetosellmyselk,ysuccinctly inkorminS others a,out my prokessionw It opens .oors kor mew When I intro.uce myselk vith itd I usually Set the responsed ”Tell me more.2 It spar9scongersationsthatlea.tonev,usinessopportunitiesw Ilogespea9inS!ThestaSeismysecon.homewIconstantlyremin.myselk thatIamalvayssellinSmyselkdcontinuinStotraintoma9ealiginSdan. mostimportantlydhoninSmys9illsinsharinS—vithhumilitydconq.enced an. competencew I hage ,een liginS this like kor the past …8 years an. countinSzIlogeegerystepokthisamajinS"ourney!Yes—I am what I thinkabout!
Lesson
The i.ea that xve ,ecome vhat ve thin9 a,outx is a principle that emphasijesthepoverokthouShttoshapeourrealitywItsuSSeststhatour thouShts are not "ust PeetinS imaSes ,ut rather poverkul korces that can inPuenceoureOperiencesdligesdan.kuturew
Here are some lessons krom the i.ea that xve ,ecome vhat ve thin9 a,outx“
Thoughts are powerful. Rositige thouShts can lea. to positige outcomesdvhileneSatigethouShtscancreate,arriersw
Thoughts can change realityw 'ur thouShts are the ,lueprint korourrealitydan.chanSinSourthin9inScanchanSeourligesw
Thoughts can alter brain structurew Uepetitige thin9inS can alterthe,rain-sstructurethrouShneuroplasticityw
Mind-body connectionw En.erstan.inS the min.G,o.y connectioncanhelptranslatethouShtsintoa.esire.realityw
Growth mindset. Bm,racinS a Srovth min.set can help turn thouShtsintotanSi,leachiegementsw
Uea. it alou. many times egery .ayw Uea. it until you start to ,eliegeit!
Uemem,er“ourthouShtscontrolouractionsw
'urkeelinSsinPuenceouractionsw
ThouShtsd keelinSsd actionsd an. results are all connecte. in a cyclew The enerSyveemitthrouShourthouShtscanattractsimilareOperiencesinto ourligeswThisis9novnasthe–avok:ttractionw
)Rleaserekerto–esson…80The–avok:ttraction
About the Author
SpeakingishisPASSION,
SellingandTrainingishisLIFE,and
SharingishisFORTE.
JohnSihisatrainedpublicspeakerandeducatorinpublicspeakingand interpersonal communication skills. He holds an Honours CertiPcate in fublic Speaking Lrom the Mondon College oL (usic )MC(T and a yeaching and ferLormance CertiPcate Lrom yrinit1 College. He is also a
ws a sales proLessionalv John Das a (illion Iollar Club (ember and achieAed the Qnternational Eualit1 wDard Lor x-cellence )QEwT during his eightq1ear tenure in the liLe insurance industr1. He deAeloped the techni“ue knoDn as 5yhe ”q(inute Closev6 Dhich he has taught to thousandsoLsalesproLessionalsandnonqsalesproLessionalsalike.
Qn 9FFOv John became the Cxz oL wccent yraining Consultants. He specialiYes in helping indiAiduals become eGectiAe interpersonal communicators and public speakers. wdditionall1v he trains sales proLessionals in the wrt oL Selling and e“uips Lrontqline o™cers Dith CustomerSerAiceSkills.wsacertiPedMaughterQnstructorvJohnteaches MaughterUogatechni“uesandisLondl1knoDnas5yheMaughterKuruoL Singapore.6
ws a fs1choqKeometrics2 practitionerv John imparts practical insights intothefs1choqKeometrics2S1stem.HeisthePrsttraineroutsidethe 0nitedStatesvCanadavandthe0nited7ingdomtobelicensedtoteach thiss1stemvandheisnoDthe(aster,ranchiseeLorSoutheastwsiavhaAing masteredandinternaliYeditsusesince9FF9.
yotheclientshecoachesvJohnisknoDnas5yheQnspirator.6HemotiAates them to reach their ma-imum potentialv talentsv and skills b1 serAing as a 5mirror6 Lor selLqre@ection. yo enhance his training eGectiAenessv John obtainedaIiplomainCounselingfs1cholog1inwugustj33 . ,orin“uiriesvcontactJohnat s1sih gmail.com.
