THE KOSHER OYSTER MAGAZINE
HOW TO D E S I G N T HE P E RF E C T N E W YE AR S RE SO LUT I O N By Rebecca Hertzman
Why do we make resolutions? We are all fully aware of the ineffectiveness of the New Years resolution – so why do we make these promises that are destined for failure year after year? Maybe it’s because they provide us with the hope of self-improvement. Even if we struggle to follow through with our resolutions they do provide us with the motivation to better ourselves, and that’s never a bad thing. It has wisely been said that the biggest room in the world is the room for self-improvement. The Vilna Gaon proposes that we must always be progressing from one level to another, because “if one does not ascend, he will inevitably fall.'' When should I make my resolution? While New Years resolutions are firmly linked with the Gregorian New Year (January 1st), the tradition of making resolutions is not a foreign concept within Judaism, but we call it Cheshbon HaNefesh - Accounting of the Soul. In this practice we look back at the person we were in the year that has passed, and ask if we have lived up to Hashem’s expectations, as well as the expectations that we set for ourselves. Rosh Hashanah may not mark the start of the secular year, but who says that resolutions have to be made at the beginning of the (secular) year? Constructing resolutions later on in the year, after you’ve started to stray from your ideals, is in fact the perfect time to re-evaluate and improve oneself.
So, how do we account our souls? Step 1: Find an area in your life that’s lacking Self-knowledge is a prerequisite for selfimprovement. Think of all the different aspects of your personality i.e. kindness, tolerance, arrogance, honesty, compassion, greed etc. Once you have a list that you feel accurately summarises all existing character traits, determine whether you have achieved a “profit” or a “loss” in each area over the past year. Step 2: Make it specific Take one of these areas in which you feel that you made a significant “loss” and ask yourself the following questions: Why did I go downhill in this characteristic? Is this having a negative impact on my life? How can I improve this aspect of myself? When you feel that you have decided on the aspect that you want to work on, make sure that you have a fully formed understanding of what the deficiency is and exactly how you can improve it. Step 3: Get your willpower going It is well known that the biggest barrier to change is a lack of willpower. It’s easy to get side tracked, to want to take the ‘easy way out’ instead of pushing until the end. There’s no simple way to get around this. You just have to focus on the end goal and imagine
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