If only after you then me by Amadeus Regucera

If only after you then me [Voice/Mezzo Soprano & Violin] Amadeus Julian Regucera 2015

If only after you then me (or, Litanies) ! Voice"(Mezzo"soprano)" Violin" " Approximate"duration:"7â&#x20AC;&#x2122;"or"9â&#x20AC;&#x2122;"with"litany"(2012)" Written"for"and"dedicated"to"Rachel"Calloway"&"Ari"Streisfeld" for"the"2015"Resonant"Bodies"Festival" Premiered"11"September"2015"at"Roulette,"Brooklyn,"New"York" Text"by"the"Composer" "

Voice!

! ! !

Violin! ! !

! AUDIENCE! ! The"piece"should"be"performed"in"relative"darkness"with"LED"standlights"for"the"performers." The"performers"should"face"each"other,"standing"or"seated,"approximately"two"feet"away"from"one"another."

! ! ! ! ! !

Performance!Indications:::! ! General:! This"piece"is"to"be"performed"by"the"two"performers,"facing"each"other."The"music"is" both"singular"(homophonic)"as"well"as"conversational"(antiphonal,"contrapuntal)" and"it"reflects"the"anxietyWaddled,"prescription/illicit"drugWaddled"mind"of"someone" in"a"romantic"(in"the"original"sense"of"the"word)"relationship"—"prone"to"emotional" flights"and"mood"swings,"the"inability"to"articulate"feelings"and"thoughts,"the" repetition"of"mantra,"the"stream"of"words"that"accompany"love"and"lust"and" infatuation"and"sadness"and"insecurity,"et"al."The"subtitle"Litanies*relates"to"the"listW like"nature"of"much"of"the"text."The"music"should"be"haunting"and"sentimental," though"retaining"both"irony"and"sarcasm"in"its"earnestness."Dramatically,"we"should" be"unsure"whether"this"music"is"for"two"people"or"one." " If*only*after*you*then*me"is"an"expansion,"or"explication/prologue"of"my"piece"litany" (written"in"2012)."At"the"end"of"this"score,"the"performers"may"choose"to"begin" (attacca)"litany.""

! Voice:!

Text:* every"graphic"thought"narcoleptic"fantasy"" in"my"memory"you're"a"rare"creature"jagged"apparition"swollen"body"desperate"predator"" If"only"after"you"then"me"" I"wake"I"breathe"I"wait"I"want"I"need"I"watch"I"sleep"I"dream"I"kill"I'm"born"I"die"I"eat"I"watch"I" touch"I"fuck"I"feel"I"feel"I"need"I"want"I"feel"I"need"I"kill"I"kill"I"fuck"I"want"(cut,"my"mouth"my" tongue"my"lips"my"face"my"neck"my"skin"your)"Memory,"like"a"deep"wound"carved"into"my" mind;"I"remember,"you,"like"a"scar."Running"my"hand"over"the"dead"flesh."our"lives,"an" abattoir."meaningful."lying"there,"awake."sitting."" here" " I"can"see"you"sleep"eyes"turned"inward"I"can't"join"you"so"I"watch"" so"close"you"are"too"far"(sweetly"towards"a"dream"I"feel"your"eyes"on"me"you"are"too"far)"" " if"you"don't"hear"from"me"send""help" " don't"promise" don't"choke" " your"memory"like"a"scar" " a"destructive"love"airtight"cotemporary"periodic"chaos" a"memory,"a"scar,""your"memory,"a"scar"" " your"mouth"and"eyes"your"skin"your"skin"your"flesh"wet"flesh"a"rare"creature"a"jagged" apparition"swollen"body"desperate"predator"gorgeous"teen"flesh"a"black"cigarette"blood"red" razor"blades"mouth"eyes"eyes"face"eyes"face"lips"flesh"a"rare"creature"gorgeous"teen"flesh" every"fiction"every"collision"a"composite"disaster"love"is"a"fashionable"emotion"eyes"mouth" lips"eyes"face"eyes"your"mouth"our"lips"your"mouth"our"eyes"your"face"my"hand"your"eyes"my" mouth"your"neck"our"skin"your"hair"our"lips"your"sweat"my"mouth"your"ear"our"skin"your" hands"my"mouth"your"neck"your"mouth"your"skin"your"sweat"your"room"your"city"your"city" your"your"body"is"our"bodies"bodies"are"we"are"bro"ken"we"we"bro"ken"we"are"we"we"are" help"please"every"graphic"thought"don't"help"send"don't"hear"from"me"send"help"if"only"don't" don't""don't"CUT"CUT"CUT"CUT"CUT"CUT"CUT"you're"too"far"so"tell"me"your"words"one"text" message"at"a"time"me"please"your"body"is"bodies"are"we"are"me"please"

* !

A*note*on*the*text:** Most"of"the"piece"is"performed"in"a"free,"sprechstimmeWlike"manner."The"emphasis" is"on"vocal""acting""and"conveying"mood"and"emotion."Oftentimes,"the"vocal"part"is" broken"down"and"recomposed"in"discrete"parts"that"rapidly"change"technique," color,"and"character."At"these"points"(i.e."mm."83W98),"emphasizing"the"contracts"is" important."That"is,"the"music"should"have"“edges,”"individual"gestures"performed"as" if"they"are"in"boxes"and"then"rearranged."Performance"and"mood"indications"are" given"when"they"are"needed." The"text"is"fragmented"in"many"instances"throughout"the"piece"in"a"sort"of"musical" aphasia."The"pronunciation"in"these"instances"should"remain"consistent"as"if"the" whole"word"were"to"be"pronounced."" Words"may"also"be"fragmented"into"single"vowel"and"consonant"sounds"and"are" contained"within"brackets"[!]."These"should"be"pronounced"according"to"the"context" given." " Vowels:" [a]"–"as"in"alm,"altar" [E]"–"as"in"elevator,"enter" [I]"–"open"“i”"as"in"sit,*will,*myth" Consonants:" [t] –"as"in"tea* [d] –"as"in"dead [k] –"as"in"cup [s] –"as"in"switch [F] –"as"in"fly* " Other:" [m]"–"closed"mouth"singing"(humming)"" +"º""–"closed/open"mouth" " "

Vocal*Staff*&*Symbols:* !

" The"staff"and"clef"that"is"most"prevalent"for"the"vocalist"is"a"3WlineWstaff" accompanied"by"an"arrow"clef."The"clef"indicates"low"to"high"“pitch”"or"“frequency”" of"the"sound"performed."The"middle"line"indicates"roughly"the"normal,"comfortable" speaking/singing"range"of"the"vocalist;"the"lower"line"indicates"a"tessitura"that"is" located"around"the"lowerWhead/chest;"and"the"higher"line"indicates"a"tessitura"that" resides"mainly"in"the"head."Any"of"the"following"symbols"can"be"placed"on"this"staff." This"“relative”"staff"is"often"juxtaposed"(and"sometimes"rapidly)"with"the"normal"5W line"staff"with"treble"clef."" " " Sung"pitch" " Sung"at"notated"pitch"with"a"mixture"of"“breathy”"timbre/noise" " Sung/spoken"at"given"pitch"(sprechstimme)" "

ii"

" "" Sung"at"the"vocalist’s"highest"possible"pitch"for"given"vowel/word" " " Performed"in"a"“speaking”"timbre"at"approximate"“pitch”"(“pitch”"here"refers"to"the" place"in"the"vocal"range"where"the"speaking"is"the"be"performed)" "

" Performed"in"a"“speaking”"timbre"with"some"breathiness"

"" " Performed"in"a"very"breathy,"whispered"way" "

! Noteheads"indicate"“breath"only.”"Upbow"and"downbow"markings"indicate"inhale" and"exhale,"respectively."This"breathing"should"be"done"with"the"mouth"open"in" order"to"be"audible"and"at"a"“pitch”"relative"to"its"position"on"the"staff." " Breathing"is"articulated"using"one"of"four"different"sounds:" [hE]!–"the"“e”Wsound"in"heaven,"wet! [ha]!–"the"“a”"in"father,"water! [F]"–"giving"the"breathing"a"stronger"sound"as"the"air"hits"the"teeth" [S]"–"giving"the"breathing"a"stronger"sound"as"it"hits"the"roof"of"the"mouth"

" An"inhalation"on"[F]"that"is"accompanied"by"a"gradual"broadening"of"the"harmonic" spectrum"as"air"is"continuously"filtered"through"the"teeth"and"the"dynamic" increases."The"result"is"a"breathy"sound"that"is"rich"with"partials"and" inharmonicities."" "

" Rolled"tongue"on"“R”""–"performed"in"the"lowest"register" "

" Lowest"possible"sound;"guttural"–"performed"on"any"vowel"or"syllable" "

Vibrato:*

The"vocal"part"is"to"be"sung"WITHOUT"VIBRATO.""

Vocalist’s*Hand*Gestures/Sound*Augmentation:* " Throughout"the"piece,"the"vocalist,"facing"the"violinist,"augments"her"voice"using"her" hands."By"cupping"her"hands"around"her"mouth"in"different"ways,"the"sound"is" obscured"or"amplified."The"symbols"represent"the"hands"as"they"are"placed"around" the"mouth"and"correspond"to"the"vocalist’s"hands"as"she"reads"the"score." " LEFT"HAND"CUP:"curve"the"left"hand"and"place"against"the"leftWside"of"your"mouth." The"result"will"amplify"the"sounds"towards"the"audience." " RIGHT"HAND"CUP:"curve"the"right"hand"and"place"against"the"rightWside"of"your" mouth."The"result"will"amplify"the"sounds"away*from*the"audience" " TWOWHAND"CUP:"curve"both"hands"and"place"them"around"your"mouth."The"result" will"muffle"the"sound"a"little"but"amplify"it"towards"the"violinist" " " NO"CUP:"Hands"are"away"from"the"mouth;"ordinario."The"hands"may"be"anywhere," but"for"dramatic/theatrical"purposes,"perhaps"best"left"on"the"vocalist’s"lap."

" MOUTH"MUFFLED:"one"or"both"hands"cover"the"mouth"and"all"sounds"produced"are" muffled"or"dampened." "

NOTE:!Arrows!between!hand!gestures!indicate!gradual!transitions! between!different!hand!gestures.!These!transitions!should!be!undertaken! as!smoothly!as!possible.!They!should!not!look!jerky!or!too!hasty.!In!this! regard,!it’s!OK!to!come!to!a!gesture!late!or!early.!! !

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! iii"

Violin:! ! ord.*–*ordinario* s.p.*–*sul*ponticello* a.s.p.*–*alto*sul*ponticello"(“almost”"ON"the"bridge,"rich"in"harmonics/noise)" s.t.*–*sul*tasto* a.s.t.*–*alto*sul*tasto"(on"the"fingerboard,"as"close"as"possible"to"the"left"hand)" " " The"dottedWarrow"between"bow"positions"indicates"a"gradual"movement"from"one" position"to"another" " cl*ric.*–*col*legno*ricochet*(throw"the"wood"of"the"bow"across"the"strings)" cl*tratto*–*col*legno*tratto"(bow"with"the"wood)" cl*batt.*–*col*legno*battuto"(strike"with"the"wood"of"the"bow"in"a"straight,"downward" motion)" " " “General"Mute”"Indicates"that"the"strings"are"to"be"fully"dampened"with"the"left" hand;"there"is"to"be"NO"pitch"–"only"noise."" " Gestures"performed"while"the"strings"are"dampened"are"articulated"on"the"staff"as" the"open"strings"(Violin:"GWDWAWE,"Viola/Cello:"CWGWDWA,"Bass:"EWAWDWG)" " "" Highest"possible"pitch" " " """" Explosive"gesture;"similar"to"glissando"or"a"“crazy,”"exaggerated"vibrato" " " Gradual"transition"from"normal"LH"pressure"to"harmonic"pressure" " " Indicates"a"sound"devoid"of"pitch"(ex."“noise”);"this"can"relate"to"extreme"bow" pressure,"dampened/muted"strings,"knocking"on"the"body"of"the"instrument" !

! Aggressively"slap"the"strings"against"the"fingerboard"with"the"LH"palm,"making"a" percussive"sound" " " " "

! Vertical*jété"–"aggressively"bring"the"bow"down"on"the"strings"directly"vertical," allowing"the"bow"to"bounce"but"not"drawing"in"horizontally"as"you"would"with"a" regular"jété"

! Bartók"(snap)"pizzicato"

" Pizzicato"strum"(always"dampened)" """" Explosive"gesture;"similar"to"glissando"or"a"“crazy,”"exaggerated"vibrato" " Indicates"a"“breathy”"or"“toneless”"timbre;"this"can"relate"to"col*legno*tratto,* rubbing"dampened/muted"strings,"bowing"dampened"strings,"bowing"the"bridge"or" tailpiece,"or*extremely"light"bow"pressure"

" Longitudinal"bow"tremolo,"“windshield"wiper”"–"pitches"are"played"while"the"bow" sweeps"the"strings"longitudinally,"resulting"in"a"“phasing”"and"breathy"timbre" "

Bow*Pressure:* "

Sudden,"bow"overpressure" "

"" The"above"indicates"a"transition"from"normal"playing"bow"pressure"to"extremely" strong"pressure"(snoring,"perforated,"or"scratch"timbre"where"there"is"no" discernible"pitch)"" "

The"above"indicates"a"transition"from"a"medium"bow"pressure"(mixture"of"pitch"and" noise)"to"extremely"strong"pressure"(no"discernible"pitch)" "

* * !

iv"

Glissando* * " Indicates"a"normal"glissando;"if"indicated,"pitches"are"not"to"be"reWarticulated"and" simply"serve"to"aid"orientation"and"finger"position" "

" Very"slow"upward"glissando" " " Very"slow"downward"glissando"

* Vocalizations* " The"violinist"is"also"asked"to"vocalize"in"the"score."See"the"notes"above"for" indications"on"the"performance"of"the"text."

! ! "

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text & music: amadeus julian regucera

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∏ ,delivered slowly, serenely, with a ﬂat aﬀect 8nged with nostalgia and dread.

Memory, like a deep wound carved into my mind; i remember, you, like a scar. running my hand over the dead flesh. our lives, an abbatoir. excessive. meaningful. lying there, awake. sitting. here.

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_≤

2 ‰ 8

b œ ..

≈

[F]

y fl

≤ > y

from

hear

"f "

_≤

∏

œ.

e _

_. [S]

‰

Ö̈

[dE]

} }

y < don'

∑

2 8

f poss.

y̆

≈

end

≤

[tE]

_ >

[S]

.. 3

3 ≈ y. ® 8 π

≈.

y-_

[F]

b >y

don't

3 y. _ 8

send

cl ric.

Vln.

_ 4 &8 æ

"f "

≈

‰

≈

e b_

cl tratto

_ J

arco ord.

_. ® 3 b œ f

you

4 8

œ̆ _æ _

[pE]

‰

pizz. s.p.

.. 3 ≈ .

≥ ≤ ≥ ≤ ≥ ≤ & 4 _. _. _. _. _. _. 8

∑

ä _

≤ _ fl [F]

-y

∑

.. 3 ≈

≈

hel

‰

(

"f "

f poss.

ä _

≈

hel

≈

5 _ b_ _ 4 8 æ æ æ

__ æ

2 8

[pE]

‰

y-_

≈

2 8

don't

œ œ. ≈ a.s.p.

2 8

≤ ≥≤≥≤ _ 2 28 ≈ _- > _. _. _. _. ≈ & œy F

49 Voice

(

i [F] you

Vox/Vln

2 _y. 8

send

Vln.

&2 8

55 Voice

j œ-

don't

≈

°j bœ

hear

° œ

œ.

œ-

from

≥ ≤

≈

j œ â

ä ® _ _ ®& b œ J y. y .

& bœ ≈ fl

59 Voice

} F

ord.

a.s.p.

µœ e J

bœ. >

j œ â

∏

≈

hear

y._ y_ y_ . -

from me don'

j œ œ >

œ bœ fl

∏

≥ ≤ ≥ ≤ ä & œ _. _. _. J

2 38 _.

you

œ &3 8 J °

≈

‰

_. _. _. _.

you

µœ

don'

y fl

≈

y._ y._

[tE]

)

[tE] [ha]

youdon't

don'

2 8 ≈

from me

> b b Tœ J

ord.

œ J

y y

‰

y fl

° ≤ y

a.s.t.

Tœ

> œ J

‰

[S]

T 2 œ

_ _- > _. _.

[tE]

b œ- œ-

(≤≥≤

≈

f poss.

[en]

≈.

y fl [dE] œ.

pizz. s.p.

[F] you

arco ord.

≈

≥ ≤ ≥ ≤ _. _. _. _. ≈ y-

y_ <

® ≈.

y_ <

hear

3 8 y.

don'

3 8 b œ.

y fl

[tE]

œ.

3 8

3 b œ. b œ œ œ b œ . . . . œ. œ 8 . 5

bœ

<> sen

hear

œ.

‰

jété

≈.

œ J

y fl

œ œ œ ≈ >

[tE]

> œ J

≈

bœ fl

don'

‰

œ.

≈

bœ œ >

fÍ

œ #œ œœ œ. . . >

‰

4 œ 8 J

# ˘œ

arco pizz.

œ J

≤ F 3 _ 4 y fl > 8 ≈ y-

‰

hear

arco s.p. Vln.

≥ ≤ ≥ ≤

_. _.

II. pizz.

Vln.

)

‰

∏

from me

}

If only after you then me

b ˘œ

‰ 3

œ.

≈

y &4 fl 8

[dE]

4 8

If only after you then me

sub. e = 60-54 suddenly quiet, very sustained, broad

p poss.

62 Voice

˙ y &4 8

sing [m] with closed mouth

≈

≈.

˙ ≈

≈

3 with R.H. ﬁst, beat chest while sustaining sung pitch; the bea:ng should be ﬁrm but not jerky/violent— in unison with violin

Vox/Vln

4 œ.

œ.

œ. .

œ.

you

don't

b œ¯

œ̄

œ̄ .

œ̄

≈

pizz.

Vln.

&4 8 64

Voice

Vox/Vln

Vln.

≈

molto sostenuto

˙ ≈

œ.

≈

œ.

don't

help

œ̄

b œ¯

≈

® ®

° _

[en]

f sub.

> y J

‰

help

Vln.

you

don't

œ̄

b œ¯

œ̄

≈.

≈

, & b yj > ƒ

œ̆

œ.

hear

don't

œ̄

≈

y œ.

≈

˙ y.

≈

arco

≈

œ̆ hear

≈

œ̄

≈

œ.

send

don't

hear

from

œ̄

≈

f poss.

> y. _ J

y fl

hel

≈

cl ric. ¨ ¨ ¨5 ¨ >y y ® J # y y y

≈

3 œ.

≈

[S]

[en]

(

f poss.

y̆

[dE]

> bœ

œ.

send

≈

œ̄

y 2

3 8

y. if

3 ‰ 8

≈

≈ 3

œ.

œ̆

œ. .

œ.

don't

help

≈

œ̄

≈

œ̄

œ̄ .

œ̄

≤ 3 _ _ _ y_ y_. 8 y. y. y. >

pizz.

œ̄ .

b œ¯ .

[pE]

œ.

≈

[dE]

} [S]

Vox/Vln

you

≈

& ≈

œ.

≈.

sub. a tempo e = 104-96

Voice

œ.

≈

≥ ≤ ≥ ≤

y _ _ _ _ fl . . . .

[AF]

ter

≈

[ter] you

≈

‰

f poss.

≥

2 j 8 >_

[en]

2 8

∑

[S]

≤ _ y. >

5 16

[dE] [hE]

5 16

you

arco a.s.p.

>œ

Sffz

o ‰

2 ≈ 8

_ _5 _ _ ® 5 _ b_ 16 æ æ æ æ æ æ

"ff "

}

69 Voice

f poss.

5 j 2 16 y

ff poss.

>_≤ _ ® ≈.

‰

> help

[F]

r yy

‰

r yy

(only slight breaks between re-takes)

5 & 16 yy

≤ >_ R

>_≤ 3 _ ®≈ ®

[F]

Vln.

(

If only after you then me

‰

_ fl

[F]

3 j 16 yy ..

≈

‰

send

3 8 yy

non-decresc. (grainy, grinding, slow bow) voice should be audible over this sound

3 _ ≈. 8

yy . .

‰

yy fl

}

ff sub.

y fl help

9 ®& 4

4 8

stay on string

sub. e = 60-54 suddenly quiet, very sustained, broad

p poss.

74 Voice

Vox/Vln

y &4 8 J

œ.

4 œ̄ . 8

hear

œ.

œ. œ. œ. œ. ®

if you

a.s.t.

&4 8

76 Voice

Vox/Vln

≈

œ.

≈

send

don't you

œ.

≈

send

‰ ≈

œ( & J

3 œ. œ. ≈

œ̄ .

œ.

‰

≈

3 œ. œ. ≈

‰

° œ

y J œ.

≈

œ.

don't

send

please

œ π

hear

‰

from

œ̄ .

œ.

hear

œ& (

≈

you don't

don't hear

Vln.

don't

Vln.

≈

j œ

pp )

p poss.

≈.

‰̇

≈.

œ.

y J

‰

œ̄

please

‰ ≈

‰

don't

Bœ J

y J

œ. œ. œ. œ. œ. œ. ® if

on ly

af ter you

If only after you then me

j œ & ≈.

78 Voice

Vox/Vln

‰ ≈

≈

≈.

≈

80 Voice

)

like the beginning: secre8ve, s8ll

√

‰

œ. &3 8 _

‰

_≤

> .y _y

[S] don't pro

Vln.

œ &3 8

‰

_y mi

_≤ [S]

y̆ f

y. >

y }

∏

‰

_. _.

√ j __

p toneless

f sub.

[UH]

bœ

≈.

don't

y J

[UH]

you

help

≈.

gra phic nar co lep tic lul la by thought

‰

y â

ff sub.

don'

‰

cho

‰

ff poss.

≈

≤> _y y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ y_ _RÔ ‰ . . . . . a. . . . . . . . ev' ry

j __

send

[tE]

≈.

q ∏ j

y̆ U

pp sub.

y â

≈.

® ‰

j __

√

‰

cl ric.

stay on string

pro-mise

2 ‰

‰

& ‰

help

[tE]

83 Voice

(F )

poco

send

‰

don'

Vln.

≈

≈.

y̆ U

≈.

® ‰

y 3

≈

hear

Bœ( J

don'

Vox/Vln

≈

send

œ & J

p poss.

then

Vln.

‰ ≈

°j œ ≈.

f sub.

- -

[ha]

pro mise

(

y̆

≈.

b œ.

pizz.

œ.

arco a.s.p. N

≈

3 8

a tempo e = 60-54 prismatic, constantly changing character & color

≤ ∏ ≈ _ _ J [S]

œ̆ ≈

b œ. . 3

plea

3 8

_ J

‰

y̆ _≤

_. 5

[kE] pro mi [S] don't pizz. a.s.p.

& 3

‰

[tE]

≈.

‰

y. y. m

_y y_ & b œ_. 5

‰

[ka] [ha]

86 Voice

& æ y. R

≤ _ _

y. _≤

~~~~ [F] [S]

arco ord.

& bœ œ >œ 5

Vln.

≈

)

≈

b œT .. °

≈ ® œ. ≈

œT

memory

œ̈

4 œ̆ ≈ 8 f

œ̈ ≈

fß

bœ

[kE] [F]

œ œ. ≈ F

}

y _≤ ≈

° ®& b œ œ

arco

your

pizz.

≈

4 ®_ ≈ 8 > _ _. _. _.

[ka] [ha] your

∏

& bœ J

‰

≈ Tœ J

Voice

∏

j _ bœ .

& ≈

Vln.

‰

3 ≈ 8

93 Voice

‰

∑

7 2 32

des truc

b œ. œ.

>1 .

dic

2y 8

cha

Vln.

7 j & 32 œT

a.s.p.

3 Tœ #œ 8 ff sub.

2 8

œ.

y. æj & bœ J y [ka] R ~~~~~~~ [m] 5

bœ œ œ > Ï

˘ 4_

≈ &

[a]

[vE]

‰

p sub.

7 y̆R 32

[S]

1 Ï

7 ≈ 32

‰

by >

tigh

4 ® y y by ≈ b œ 8 y > . Ï

‰

3 b œ œ äœ œ y 7 2 . y y y. y 32 . fl . y.

air

‰

_. _. U‰ _ __. m> _. . .

[UH] [ha]

arco a.s.p.

˘ bœ J

≥ ≤ ≥6 ≤ ≥ ≤

pizz.

≈

arco a.s.p.

molto vib.

arco

ti [F]

pp sub.

Tœ ≈ .

monotone, decisive, cuGng 4

[S]

≤ _ œ y. _ & ® b œ 2 2 œ pizz. a.s.p.

≈. & y y by b œ y > .

Tœ J

3 8 œ.

Tœ J

pp sub.

œ J

[a]

q 90

If only after you then me

[tE] co tem po ra

œ.

pizz. a.s.p.

œ.

jété

# œ. # œ. . # œ œ.

7 32

giggle

≈

≈.

5 œ. œ. œ. _ _ _ ® 2 œ y. y. y. m 16 [hm] > me mo ry [hm [hm]

3 j 8 bœ [a]

[UH]

¨ ¨ y y by 3 y œ 8 œ œ ≈. . Ï p ff sub. 5

pizz. a.s.p.

b œ. p

œ.

n œ. f

≈

5 16

12 98

Voice

If only after you then me

f- p

° 5 _J

j y & 4 ‰ æ yæ 8 y fl [ka] R ~~~~~~~~~~

2 16

[S]

Vln.

5 & 16 b œ.

œ.

n œ.

œ̆

œ.

4 ≈ 8

each fragment should be delivered naturally

‰

œ-_

≈

œ._ œ_. œ_.

your

Vln.

‰

& ≈

‰

≈.

œ.

≈

b œ. œ.

arco a.s.p.

œ̈ œ̈ ‰

œ_ .

and

‰

≈

‰

œ-_

‰

œ_ a

‰

≈

‰

œ-_

‰

scar pizz. a.s.p.

‰

≈

b œ. œ. π

‰

≈

œ_ œ-_ .

your skin

‰

b œ. œ.

≈

≈ œ œ . .

≈.

>_≤

[ha]

‰

≈

œ_ œ-_ .

≈.

& ‰

≈. œ.y œ.y œ-y œ.y a rare crea ture

Vln.

& ≈.

œ.

‰

≈

œ. œ.

‰

≈ œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y a

≈

jag ged ap pa ri tion

œ.

_ œ._ œ- ≈ your mouth

‰

œ. œ. ≈

>_≤

‰

your skin

≈ ≈ œ .

cresc.

≈.

≈

œ_ œ-_ .

[ha]

‰

your flesh

‰

b œ. œ.

≈

‰

≈

‰

≈ œy œy œy œy

- . . .

swollen bo dy

œ. œ.

® ‰

œ. .

œ.

≈.

gor geous teen flesh

œ.

‰

a black ci ga

œ.

≈

≈. œ-_ ®

‰

œ.

® ≈

b œ. œ.

b œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y

blood red

œ-_

wet

cresc.

® ® œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y œ.y 16 œ.y

des pe rate pre da tor

‰

≈

106

Voice

≈

quasi parlando

eyes

≈.

≈

memory

102

Voice

‰

yœr .

flesh

≈

2 16

zorblades

rette

5 ≈ 16

œ. œ b œ. . f

≈

2 16

If only after you then me

110

Voice

Vox/Vln

2 ≈ & 16

b äœ

2 ® 2 16

arco a.s.p.

Vln.

2 ® & 16

117

Voice

> 3 y

fle

Vln.

b äœ

shouted, exaggerated, cuGng 3

≈

mouth

y̆

y̆ CUT

b ¨y

b ÿ ÿ

y̆

≈

‰

[E]

rare

a.s.p.

≈.

y̆

≈

-y y. y. y.

y. y. ≈ crea ture

5 16 b œT

y by

b œT

gor geous teen flesh

œT ..

yœ

3 ≈ 16

y̆

≈

ä. 3 yJ

≈

3 8

® ≈

3 8

3 ® y̆ ≈ 16

≈

b ¨y ÿ

2 38

CUT

b ÿ ÿ

‰

≈

y y

lips

‰

3 ® 16 R

empha8c, pleading

>y R

ev'

äy J

fic

tion

r Tœ -

3 j 8 b b Ty ..

œT ..

b äœ œ

face

‰

CUT

b ÿ ÿ

ord.

y by

b äœ

≈

CUT

5 y 16

≈.

b ÿ ÿ

‰

yœ

eyes

b äœ

≈

CUT

y̆

yœ

y̆

≈

[SH]

‰ &3 8

b ÿ ÿ

b äœ

≈

face

CUT 3

yœ

eyes

CUT

ÿ

b äœ

≈

eyes

≈

yœ

2 8

N 4

Ty .. â

œT Ty .. â

œT

2 8

accel. cresc.

120

Voice

ä 2 yJ 28

äy . J

ev'

Vln.

&2 8 Ty .. â

>y R

j Tœ Ty â

col

œT

>y . . . >y y ®y y 7 5

li sion

a compo

y. si

ä y̆ y. y y. 7 y . ® ® 8

[tE]

di sas ter

äœ Ÿ~~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~ œ. œbe Ÿ~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~ j #œ 7 r œ be œ j 7 J J R e # œ R R #œ ne 16 b b œT 8 5 3 N

Ty â

p sub.

with the violin; dynamics, energy should be the same or similar

‰

[vE]

-y3 y ≈ ≈ is

œ œ J

y ˘œ äœ y y œ œ y N

äy . . yy. . y ≈ 3

- äy -y ≈ ≈ y ≈ 3

fashio nable

˘œ œ. œ. >œ œœœœ J

œ. ˘œ >œ œ œ œ

& 4

mo tion N

y y 3

4 8

If only after you then me

a tempo e = 104-96

ppp poss.

123

Voice

_ &4 # œ 8 .

œ_

‰

Vox/Vln

‰

eyes

œ_ .

mouth

# œ_

‰

œ_

‰

eyes

_ _ _

≈.

_ _ _ _ _

& # œ_

‰

>y & J

œ_

your

mouth

≈ quasi parlando

‰

# œ_ n œ_

‰

& # œ_

‰

œ_

your

neck

mouth

eyes

œ̈ ¨ ¨ œ̈ ¨ b œ ® bœ ≈. œ̈ #œ

‰

œ > f

œ.

‰

œ.

‰

œ.

# œ.

‰

œ.

our

® ≈

text message

_ _

y. y. y_.

≈

a time

j œ

#œ

our

skin

# œ_

‰

b >y

≈

your

œ_

‰

face

b >y

‰

hand

# œ_

j œ

œ_

eyes

‰

your

¨ ¨ ®bœ œ ® ≈

j y ß>

œ_ 3

¨ œ

‰

œy 3

your

N >y y¨ y¨ y y y ‰

mechanical, violent; similar to "shotgun ﬁgure" from m. 10 [slap ﬁngerboard with L.H. at the end of the glissando]

‰

œy

‰

hair

pizz. a.s.p.

œ.

‰

our

# œ.

œ.

œy

‰

lips

arco a.s.p.

œ.

1 1 J

‰

¨ œ̈ . ® œ ≈

y > ß

œ-

# œ3

your

‰

sweat

N >y y ç

>œ yy¨ yy¨ œ ≈ Í

œ-y

‰

¨ œ̈ œ≈

molto tenuto, "singing" is broader

œy

>1 1

‰

# œy 3

arco a.s.p.

œ̆

œ_

pizz.

our

¨ ¨ ‰ bœ œ

œ_

# œ_

‰

130

Vln.

_ _ _

‰

poco cresc.

Voice

one

œ.

mouth

y. y. y.

lips

Vln.

y_.

‰

œ.

a.s.p.

∑

126

Voice

≈

so tell me your words

∑

&4 8

# œ.

your

y. y. y. y. y.

you're too far

Vln.

‰

eyes

≈

y. y. y.

‰

face

≈.

∑

2 48

‰

lips

œ_

œ œ

>œ œ J f

œ̈ ƒ

If only after you then me

134

Voice

œ-

& y

œ-

‰

Vln.

>œ œ

‰

mouth

3 œ-

1 1 J

œ-

‰

ear

>œ œ J

‰

your

œ-

our

œy

skin

your

yj #œ

‰

yœ

‰

hands

N >y y

as before

‰

>1 . N >y y¨ y¨ ® 1 . y y y

y¨ y

y¨ y ®

>1 1

äœ

ä yœ

‰

yœ

mouth

your

N >y y

yœ

y¨ y¨ y y ®

>1 1

‰

neck

yœ

your

mouth

>1 N >y y y¨ y¨ 1 y y y y ® J

. .

3 œy-

poco rall. 138

Voice

Vln.

‰

Vln.

& &

äœ

‰

œ3

yœ

N >y y

‰

skin

y¨ y¨ ® y y

>1 . 1.

‰

yœ your

äœ b œ ‰ bo dy

y y fl â

your

-œ œ

sweat

N >y y

œ-

‰

j y â

n œy -

your

}b y

¨y ÿ ÿ J b ÿ ÿ

‰

j by â

3 8

bo dies

≈

y y fl â

3 8 by

äœ

y >

by y fl â

äœ b œ œ

y y y

your

slight portamento aIer each aJack; "mel8ng" 3

(unison with the voice)

j by â

n œ-

œ 3

your

y y fl â

y â

sub. e = 60-54 desperate, exhausted, contemplative

n äœ b œ œ bo

arco a.s.p.

äœ3 b œ ‰

3 œ- b œ ‰ y y

‰

room

our

‰

œ-

y y

your

y¨ y¨ y y ≈.

by fl

‰

äœ œ y y ‰

cl ric.

œ-

‰

your

142

Voice

cresc. ma non troppo

dies

y fl â

j n œy â are

j y fl

n äœ

b œ.

‰

4 ‰ 8

‰

are

y â

‰

2 48

y fl

If only after you then me

} π

146

Voice

‰

≈

y. y.

)

≈.

‰

broken

Vox/Vln

Vln.

pizz.

& ‰

≈

≈ ‰

b œ. œ. ∏ ∏

œ.

‰

®__≈ 5

y. y.

∑

150

Voice

‰

}

‰

≈

‰

œ.

‰

≈ œ ≈ .

‰

Vln.

. & ® œ

‰

≈

b œ. œ.

≈

∑

≈.

≈

‰

b œ.

≈ 3

‰

are

œ.

‰

(

y- .

hel

‰

œ.

≈

® ‰ y_. y_.

∑ ‰

‰

∑

® ‰

‰

we are

∑

® ‰

‰

bro ken

Vox/Vln

‰

(

‰

[pE]

‰

≈

‰

≈

b œ. œ.

≈

œ. ≈

œ. ≤ -_

≈ 3

& 2

please

‰

≈ ∑

≈

2 4

please

2 4 ATTACCA Litany

If only after you then me

q= 76-66, uneasy, menacing ∏ sotto voce

Voice

≈ ≈ ≈ &2 œ- œ œ 4 b œ- œ < screa

screa

pizz. pont.

Vln.

&2 ‰. 4 b œ. π

Voice

œ. œ. ‰ .

‰ &3 4

≈ bœ œ ‰

≈ œ œ ‰

& Œ

≈ b >œ .

Vln.

≈

œ.

œ ‰.

œ̆

# œ. ≈ ≈ n œœ œœ œ # œ œ & œ . . . œ > º

≈

3 8 œ.

œ.

f sub

‰

œ. b œ.

tee

‰

screaming

arco pont.

. œ. # œ. œ. œ

œ̆

ming

‰

≈ ≈

œ.

screa

œ.

swea ting

œ.

blood

>œ

œ- b œ

œ Œ R

œ>œ œœ .. f º

whi

>œ œ. ≈ œ. ≈ ≈ clenched teeth

. œ. ≈ ‰ # œ 4 5

clenched

œ Œ R

œ œ œ bœ y ‰ fl

white

[na]

[k]

œ. œ b œ œ œ b œ . . . . >

‰

ming head

˘ .œ œ ≈

teeth

[a]

[k]

œ >

‰

ppp sub

1̆

œ- œ ‰

[a]

‰

œ- œ ‰

[a]

‰

3 4

œ- œ

[a]

‰

freely, half-whispered, low...

‰

œœœœ œ œ œ y 2 fl

[na]

4 ‰ b œ- œ ‰

pizz. pont.

ming

screa

œ. œ. œ. b œ. œ. . . œ b œ œ. œ. .. 3 j œ. .. 8 œ. J 5

œ. œ. œ. b œ. œ. . . œ. œ. n œ. b œ. œ. > œ œ œ œ œ b œ œ. œ.

teeth

. . .œ # œ. œ. # œ. œ. n œ. # œ. n œ. œ. # œ. œ œ 4 œ

clenched

œ.

œ. ≈ ‰

˘1 ≈ .œ bœ œ ≈ ≈ 3 R .. 3 8 4 œ.

pizz. pont.

œ̆

ƒp

œ.

œ. Œ R

head

‰

shot screa

œ.

ming

2 4 ‰

œ. ≈

white

arco pont.

head screa

screa

œ.

.. Œ

white

arco pizz.

œ.

head

≈ œ œ

œ. œ. œ. # œ. œ. œ # œ œ &3 4 . . .

ing

pizz. pont.

Voice

œ ≈ 3 œ 2 ≈ ≈ ≈ ≈ ≈ b œ. b œ- œ . œ- œ 8 . b œ- œ œ- œ 4 b œ- œ œ- œ

b œ. œ. ‰

cle

Vln.

≈

œ <

sempre con sord.

≈

SCREAMING HEAD...

swe

arco pont.

bœ œ ≈ œ œ œ bœ œ œ >

∏

whispered

≤ ≈ œ. arco

ric.

If only after you then me

15 Voice

Vln.

CLENCHED TEETH...

œ.

‰

≈

b œ. œ œ œ

‰

WHITE

œ œ œ bœ œ

‰.

j œ.

KNUCKLES

œ̆

≈

bœ œ

∏

≤

arco

cl ric.

≈ ‰

bœ > ß

œ œ.

sub. q= 80, strident p-

19 Voice

IMAGES FALL... SLOW.

2 58

œ- œ ‰ .

œ œ ≈ ‰. & 3 .. ≈ 4

SILENT...

swea

Vln.

≈ œ. ≈ ‰ &5 b œ. 8 π

≈

b œ. œ.

≈

b ˘œ

≤. 3 .. œœ .

œœ≤ œœ

f sub

œœ≤

fº

bœ ß>

≤ œ̆ ≈ ‰ œ œ.

.. 5 .. 4

≈ œ.

œ̆

≈

œ.

≈

f sub

b ˘œ

œ.

‰.

b ˘œ ß

‰

bœ œ 8 5

π ƒ

b äœ

e .. 4

brow

œ.

pizz.

œœ œœ≤ ..

.. 5 ..

f º

fº

SILENT,

arco pont.

cl ric.

ted

(pont.)

‰

AND.

5 AND. 8

SLOW.

œ.

œ. b œ.

5 œ. œ. n œ. b œ. œ. . . œ b œ œ. œ. œ. œ. b œ. œ. b œ œ .. 4 . . 4 5

œ.

pont.

p sub

Tempo 1 q= 72-66, hypnotic

Voice

sotto voce

[na]

arco tasto

Vln.

3 5 5 5 . ≈ y. ≈ y. ≈ y. y. ≈ y. y. ≈ 4 ‰ b œ- œ ‰ 4 3 ≈ y & 4 œ œ œ œ œ bœ œ œ œ œ nœ œbœ y œ nœ œ y 4 2 & 4

æ &4 4 ˙˙ ..

ppp sub

[k][na]

[k]

[s]

[k] [s]

cl batt.

y y fl ß

3 y ≈ y ≈ y ≈ y y ≈ y y≈ 4 y y y y y y y . . . . . . . f

pizz. pont.

4 4 œ . f

œ.

≈

≈ œ. ≈ œ œ

œ. haus

œ.

ted

œ.

≈

œ. œ.

‰

and

≈ ‰

b œ-

bœ

emp

ty and

‰ ‰

œ.

b œ.

œ.

‰

œ.

‰

≈ œ. emp

œ.

‰

≈

œ.

≈

If only after you then me

26 Voice

bœ ≈

Vln.

œ. œ.

Voice

&5 4

f sub

‰ bœ œ ≈ ≈ œ œ ‰.

emp

‰ ‰.

p sub 1.

œ.

‰.

# äœ

‰ ‰

œ.

minate

f P

œ- œ œ. ≈ ‰

œ ≈ ‰

. . . . .œ # œ. œ. # œ. œ. # œ. œ œ œ. n œ. # œ. n œ. n œ. # œ. œ œ

œ.

. . . ≈ œ ≈ œ œ ‰.

# œ. ‰ .

≈

n œ- œ

≈

# œ-

# œ. ≈ ≈ œ. ‰

œ.

end

less

œ. ‰ .

≈ Œ

. . . ≈ #œ ≈ œ œ ‰.

. # œ. œ. œ. . . œ . . œ # œ œ#œ œ. # œ. œ. œ. œ œ # œ œ. . . .

#œ ≈ #œ

œ̆

‰

di ca

œ̆

‰

fff poss.

œ̆

‰

œ̆

&5 4

‰

5 4

5 8

late

Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ >œ # e >œ >œ >œ œ >œ œ œ >œ œ œ >œ œ œ Í

œ̆

‰

arco pont.

Vln.

5 4

ted

œ ≈ ≈ n œ- œ ≈ ≈ # œ- 7 n œ ≈ ‰

mas

œ.

‰

7 8

r œœ œœ >

ric.

≈

bœ >

œ œ

arco 1.

pizz.

≈ œ̆ 5

accel. poco a poco 33 Voice

.. &5 8 œ. e

arco pont.

Vln.

.. ‰ . &5 8 b œœ > f

œ. b œ. b œ. n œ.

∏

.. 3 œ œ ‰ b œ œ ‰ .

œ œ ≈ ‰

Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~ # œ≤ e œ œ̆ ≈ .. 3 J J 4 œ. º

sotto voce

phal

lic

5 .. œ 8 . e

arco pont.

‰

œ.

‰

œ.

‰

5 .. œ ‰ . 8 bœ

œ. b œ. b œ. n œ.

F disgusted 5

œ- b œ

‰

pizz. Ÿ~~~~~~~~~~~ pont. ≤ e # œ œ œ̆ œ. ≈ .. b œ. J J

n œ- b œ

‰.

2 œ ‰ n œ- b œ 4 - œ

œ.

pha

b œ.

œ.

œ- b œ

‰

tis

œ̆ ˘œ ˘œ 2 ≈ ≈ bœ œ ≈ y. y. 4 5 â arco pont.

≈

sempre

If only after you then me

accel. poco a poco

Voice

Vln.

& ‰.

Voice

y fl

sce

œ-

emphallic

embolism

rate

j yj j y y y y y 3

y â

‰

œ. œ.

becoming frantic

by ‰ fl

2 . . . . ≈ yj yj yy yy yy yy y y j j j j fl fl 5

q = 112-108, wild

y. y j >œ

arco

y. R

ric. 5

y̆ 2. . . . . . y. y. b y y. ≈ yy yy yy yy yy

j j j j j

cresc. e accel. poco a poco

repeat words as desired, ad nauseum

encephali8s

Vln.

œ-

(from here until the end, vocalizations should become more frantic, desperate, panicked, unhinged, dramatic)

œ-

œ. e

j & yy ..

freely, ad lib – vary rhythm & dynamics

& ≈

y. b y.

eviscerate

n y. y.

ex8rpate

‰.

y fl

(cresc. poco a poco)

≈

# ˘y

entropy

‰.

j y .

b y.

n y. y.

ephedrine

. y. b y. ≈ . y. n y. y y y. y. 5

46 Voice

Vln.

excrescence

enuresis

y̆ y.

≈

y̆ y.

≈

y̆ y.

eternal return

encyst

≈

y̆ y.

≈

# y.

≈

y̆

≈

y b y. .

# y.

y̆ ≈

y. y.

end with violin!

repeat ad nauseum!

b y.

y̆ y. y.

‰

j y .

y. # y.

≈

y b y. . fl ffff poss.

˘ y̆ b y

‰